1
00:00:03,963 --> 00:00:05,327
They called them orangeries,
2
00:00:05,352 --> 00:00:06,835
but they didn't just grow oranges.
3
00:00:06,860 --> 00:00:08,396
They grew pineapples,
4
00:00:08,421 --> 00:00:10,455
- figs, peaches.
- Nice.
5
00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:11,900
- I could go on.
- Uh-huh.
6
00:00:11,925 --> 00:00:13,524
Pomegranates.
7
00:00:13,549 --> 00:00:16,638
Of course, you see here our
famous champagne and gin bar,
8
00:00:16,663 --> 00:00:17,795
and the French windows here
9
00:00:17,820 --> 00:00:19,945
open onto our ornamental lake
10
00:00:19,970 --> 00:00:21,543
- Wow.
- and gardens, which are perfect
11
00:00:21,568 --> 00:00:22,805
- for hog roasts...
- Mm-hmm.
12
00:00:22,830 --> 00:00:24,430
Or vegan equivalent
if that's your thing.
13
00:00:25,315 --> 00:00:26,849
Is there a vegan
equivalent to a hog roast?
14
00:00:26,873 --> 00:00:29,124
No, not really.
I'll just get the key to the garden.
15
00:00:29,149 --> 00:00:30,555
Thanks.
16
00:00:38,785 --> 00:00:40,666
- It's nice, isn't it?
- Sorry, won't be a minute.
17
00:00:40,690 --> 00:00:42,330
Darren's in a flap about something.
18
00:00:42,355 --> 00:00:44,432
- Mm. Can you do that later?
- It's my work.
19
00:00:44,457 --> 00:00:45,668
Yeah, I know. This is our wedding,
20
00:00:45,692 --> 00:00:47,170
and you don't seem that
engaged in the process.
21
00:00:47,194 --> 00:00:50,048
I am. I am engaged in the process.
22
00:00:50,073 --> 00:00:51,516
- Are you?
- Yeah.
23
00:00:51,541 --> 00:00:52,555
Fuck me.
24
00:00:52,580 --> 00:00:54,442
So can you just...
just chill out a little bit?
25
00:00:54,467 --> 00:00:56,532
No, I'm... I'm chill. I'm Mr. Chablis.
26
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:58,079
- You're the unchill one.
- What?
27
00:00:58,104 --> 00:01:00,094
Do you want to book this fucking venue?
28
00:01:03,264 --> 00:01:05,016
She doesn't like it.
29
00:01:05,798 --> 00:01:06,798
I didn't say that.
30
00:01:06,823 --> 00:01:08,415
You didn't say you liked it, either.
31
00:01:08,587 --> 00:01:10,821
That is true.
32
00:01:17,655 --> 00:01:20,696
This is all just lovely.
33
00:01:20,892 --> 00:01:22,158
It's really lovely.
34
00:01:30,238 --> 00:01:35,238
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
35
00:01:41,548 --> 00:01:44,148
I... look, I am keen on this...
36
00:01:44,173 --> 00:01:46,261
This, you know, getting married.
37
00:01:46,286 --> 00:01:47,866
- Mm-hmm.
- It's just that work
38
00:01:47,891 --> 00:01:49,190
is really mad at the moment.
39
00:01:49,215 --> 00:01:50,665
No, I get it. I... I do.
40
00:01:50,690 --> 00:01:51,967
I mean, you've done this before.
41
00:01:51,991 --> 00:01:53,260
- Done what?
- Got married,
42
00:01:53,285 --> 00:01:55,770
had the church wedding, the swanky
reception, the doves.
43
00:01:55,795 --> 00:01:57,128
- Peacocks.
- You had peacocks?
44
00:01:57,153 --> 00:01:59,107
Yeah, and a monkey riding a flamingo.
45
00:01:59,132 --> 00:02:00,526
Of course we didn't, or doves.
46
00:02:00,551 --> 00:02:02,310
- Uh-huh.
- Look, why don't we just get
47
00:02:02,335 --> 00:02:03,835
pissed and sign on the dotted line?
48
00:02:03,860 --> 00:02:06,247
Because I'd like our wedding
to be a bit less like applying
49
00:02:06,272 --> 00:02:08,229
for a car loan, while pissed.
50
00:02:08,433 --> 00:02:09,452
I'll bet that's Darren,
51
00:02:09,476 --> 00:02:10,676
- isn't it? Yeah.
- It's Darren, sorry.
52
00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:13,455
- Hello? Hi. Hello.
- Fuck's sake, man.
53
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:15,423
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
no, that's... okay, fine,
54
00:02:15,448 --> 00:02:16,881
just yeah, patch them through.
55
00:02:16,906 --> 00:02:19,670
- Patch them through.
- Transfer the call.
56
00:02:21,221 --> 00:02:22,838
Hello, Lothar.
57
00:02:23,479 --> 00:02:25,097
Oh, can you collect Luke
from Bear's house?
58
00:02:25,121 --> 00:02:27,092
- Bear?
- Yeah, he's a boy in Luke's class.
59
00:02:27,117 --> 00:02:29,273
- Called Bear?
- Yes.
60
00:02:30,967 --> 00:02:31,985
Bear, though?
61
00:02:32,010 --> 00:02:34,109
And Bear's having an eco-friendly party,
62
00:02:34,134 --> 00:02:36,134
so park round the corner
and say that you walked.
63
00:02:36,242 --> 00:02:38,236
Mm-hmm.
64
00:02:45,612 --> 00:02:47,411
Fucking Bear.
65
00:02:55,879 --> 00:02:56,912
Yeah?
66
00:02:56,937 --> 00:02:59,122
Hi, hey. I've come to pick up Luke.
67
00:02:59,147 --> 00:03:01,331
Oh, okay, Luke, right.
68
00:03:01,356 --> 00:03:02,567
You're his dad?
69
00:03:02,829 --> 00:03:05,196
- Yeah.
- Okay, thing is, dude,
70
00:03:05,221 --> 00:03:06,875
there's been a bit of an incident.
71
00:03:06,900 --> 00:03:08,243
Oh, is he all right?
72
00:03:08,268 --> 00:03:10,134
He can get a bit overwhelmed at parties.
73
00:03:10,159 --> 00:03:12,069
He's okay. It's just, uh...
74
00:03:12,564 --> 00:03:14,683
I don't really know how to put this.
75
00:03:14,708 --> 00:03:17,034
Luke pulled Bear's hair.
76
00:03:17,455 --> 00:03:19,956
- He...
- Pulled Bear's hair.
77
00:03:19,981 --> 00:03:21,203
Oh.
78
00:03:21,501 --> 00:03:22,971
Bear?
79
00:03:23,402 --> 00:03:26,594
Yeah, this is Luke's dad.
He's come to say sorry.
80
00:03:26,619 --> 00:03:29,278
No, I... no, I've actually
just come to pick up Luke.
81
00:03:29,303 --> 00:03:31,416
- All right, Luke?
- Hey, mate.
82
00:03:31,441 --> 00:03:33,535
- Can we go now?
- Yeah, one... one second, mate.
83
00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:35,803
So hi, buddy.
You ready to say sorry to Bear?
84
00:03:35,828 --> 00:03:37,993
I think I can ask my son that,
thank you, buddy.
85
00:03:39,085 --> 00:03:40,208
Did you pull Bear's hair?
86
00:03:40,233 --> 00:03:41,523
- No.
- Right.
87
00:03:41,548 --> 00:03:45,862
Yeah, see, the thing is,
though, that's not true, is it?
88
00:03:46,797 --> 00:03:49,584
- No, I did it.
- You did it?
89
00:03:49,609 --> 00:03:51,509
Okay. It was probably an accident.
90
00:03:51,534 --> 00:03:53,488
- Right.
- Well, okay, either way, mate,
91
00:03:53,513 --> 00:03:55,862
I think you should say sorry to Bear
92
00:03:55,887 --> 00:03:58,142
for pulling Bear's hair.
93
00:03:59,886 --> 00:04:01,452
- Sorry.
- Okay.
94
00:04:01,477 --> 00:04:03,431
Is the car parked round the corner?
95
00:04:03,456 --> 00:04:05,358
No, 'cause we walked.
96
00:04:05,758 --> 00:04:08,210
- I'll have a word with him.
- Right. Great. I appreciate it.
97
00:04:08,235 --> 00:04:09,610
I know it must be tough having a kid
98
00:04:09,634 --> 00:04:11,140
- who does this sort of thing.
- Fuck.
99
00:04:11,164 --> 00:04:12,540
Did Luke get a party bag?
100
00:04:12,565 --> 00:04:13,898
He doesn't want a party bag.
101
00:04:14,077 --> 00:04:15,910
Oi, felon.
102
00:04:18,594 --> 00:04:20,163
Pulling hair is wrong, mate.
103
00:04:20,866 --> 00:04:22,150
I mean, all violence is wrong,
104
00:04:22,175 --> 00:04:24,154
but, you know,
at least punching's a sport.
105
00:04:24,179 --> 00:04:25,713
- Is it?
- Yes, boxing.
106
00:04:25,738 --> 00:04:27,905
Boxing's in the Olympics.
Hair pulling isn't.
107
00:04:28,912 --> 00:04:31,853
- It would be funny if it was.
- It really would be.
108
00:04:35,288 --> 00:04:37,265
Look, launching a studio in Berlin
109
00:04:37,290 --> 00:04:39,367
would obviously be fantastisch,
110
00:04:39,392 --> 00:04:40,935
but I... I just... I can't.
111
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:42,293
- They love you out there.
- Ugh.
112
00:04:42,318 --> 00:04:44,239
And want you to set everything up.
113
00:04:44,264 --> 00:04:45,774
They know I've only
got schoolboy German,
114
00:04:45,798 --> 00:04:48,799
a thick schoolboy who
always bunks off German.
115
00:04:48,824 --> 00:04:50,224
If it wasn't for the... the wedding
116
00:04:50,249 --> 00:04:51,841
and the kids, then, you know.
117
00:04:51,866 --> 00:04:53,399
- I understand.
- Yeah.
118
00:04:55,546 --> 00:04:58,052
What if I offered you a 30K bonus
119
00:04:58,077 --> 00:05:00,655
- as well as the partnership?
- Darren, fucking hell.
120
00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:05,156
Seriously, 30,000 pounds in money.
121
00:05:08,171 --> 00:05:09,931
No. I can't.
122
00:05:09,956 --> 00:05:12,723
It's just... it's... sorry,
it's the wrong time.
123
00:05:12,748 --> 00:05:16,070
I get it. I really do,
and I respect your priorities,
124
00:05:16,095 --> 00:05:17,965
but let me just say one last thing.
125
00:05:17,990 --> 00:05:20,880
- Is it 40,000?
- No, it's not that.
126
00:05:21,556 --> 00:05:22,933
50.
127
00:05:25,053 --> 00:05:26,775
- God.
- You know what?
128
00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:30,402
Bear's dad is such a
passive-aggressive cockhead.
129
00:05:30,427 --> 00:05:32,144
- I've seen him. He looks it.
- Mm.
130
00:05:32,467 --> 00:05:34,589
He called me "dude"
and started going on about
131
00:05:34,614 --> 00:05:37,159
how Luke pulled Bear's hair.
132
00:05:37,184 --> 00:05:40,376
- Sorry, Luke did what?
- Pulled Bear's hair.
133
00:05:40,401 --> 00:05:41,879
Luke would never do anything like that.
134
00:05:41,903 --> 00:05:43,382
Yeah, I know, I told Daddy Bear that.
135
00:05:43,406 --> 00:05:45,172
- Good.
- But then Luke admitted
136
00:05:45,197 --> 00:05:46,839
he'd done it, so...
137
00:05:46,864 --> 00:05:49,048
Oh. Should I talk to him?
138
00:05:49,073 --> 00:05:50,178
No, it's all right. I talked to him.
139
00:05:50,202 --> 00:05:51,384
- I should talk to him.
- Why?
140
00:05:51,409 --> 00:05:52,607
Is my talking to him not enough?
141
00:05:52,631 --> 00:05:54,168
You're busy. I've got this.
142
00:05:54,613 --> 00:05:56,525
Oh, on the subject of busy,
you know that appointment
143
00:05:56,549 --> 00:05:58,546
I made to see that venue tomorrow?
144
00:05:58,571 --> 00:06:00,271
No, come on. This one was your choice.
145
00:06:00,296 --> 00:06:02,008
Yeah, no, exactly,
so I already know I like it.
146
00:06:02,032 --> 00:06:05,063
I don't need to go. You go.
You could take your mum.
147
00:06:05,454 --> 00:06:06,741
That's a great idea. It's brilliant.
148
00:06:06,765 --> 00:06:07,989
Except you know what?
149
00:06:08,014 --> 00:06:09,824
I'm not marrying my own fucking mum.
150
00:06:09,849 --> 00:06:11,092
All right. I am sorry.
151
00:06:11,117 --> 00:06:12,529
I just... I couldn't get
out of this meeting.
152
00:06:12,553 --> 00:06:14,028
- Mm-hmm.
- Come on.
153
00:06:14,053 --> 00:06:16,541
- You know what a twat work can be.
- Mm-hmm.
154
00:06:24,102 --> 00:06:25,296
I know.
155
00:06:25,321 --> 00:06:27,208
It's not a position I
wanted to put you in.
156
00:06:27,233 --> 00:06:29,433
I'm like Meryl Streep
in "Sophie's Choice."
157
00:06:29,458 --> 00:06:30,791
Sophie...
158
00:06:30,816 --> 00:06:32,762
Hmm? Doesn't matter. It's a film.
159
00:06:32,787 --> 00:06:36,548
She has to choose between
saving her son or her daughter.
160
00:06:36,576 --> 00:06:38,843
- Oh, right.
- I mean, she won the Oscar,
161
00:06:38,868 --> 00:06:41,522
but it was... it was a while ago.
Anyway, what I'm saying
162
00:06:41,547 --> 00:06:44,682
is how am I supposed to choose
who in my section to fire?
163
00:06:44,707 --> 00:06:46,178
Make redundant.
164
00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:49,772
I understand it's unbearable,
but we're spread way too thin,
165
00:06:49,991 --> 00:06:52,002
and next year's cuts in this sector...
166
00:06:52,027 --> 00:06:54,715
Will be brutal, I know. I do know.
167
00:06:55,133 --> 00:06:57,071
How about seeing if Ben
will take redundancy?
168
00:06:57,096 --> 00:06:58,643
He's got two-year-old twins.
169
00:06:58,668 --> 00:07:00,565
I mean twins who are two years old,
170
00:07:00,589 --> 00:07:02,070
not two twins who are a year old.
171
00:07:02,102 --> 00:07:04,379
I mean, obviously he's got two twins.
172
00:07:04,404 --> 00:07:06,470
Were Meryl Streep's children twins?
173
00:07:06,495 --> 00:07:07,794
I don't know.
174
00:07:07,819 --> 00:07:11,058
- How about letting Rachel go?
- She's just bought a flat.
175
00:07:11,083 --> 00:07:12,730
- Manish?
- Mum's having chemo.
176
00:07:14,974 --> 00:07:17,525
Look, I'm sorry, Paul.
I know it's tough,
177
00:07:17,550 --> 00:07:19,228
but I will need a name
by the end of the week.
178
00:07:19,252 --> 00:07:20,518
I know.
179
00:07:22,248 --> 00:07:23,625
Well, okay.
180
00:07:29,090 --> 00:07:31,339
Who does Meryl choose to save?
181
00:07:31,364 --> 00:07:34,265
Her son, but they all die in the end.
182
00:07:34,290 --> 00:07:36,990
Mm. Might stick with "Mamma Mia."
183
00:07:45,953 --> 00:07:47,625
Well, it's all right, Paul,
184
00:07:47,650 --> 00:07:50,161
but why do you want to
get married in a shed?
185
00:07:50,186 --> 00:07:51,819
Hmm? It's a barn.
186
00:07:51,979 --> 00:07:54,065
Why don't you do it
in a proper building?
187
00:07:54,090 --> 00:07:56,602
The church hall's only 20 pound an hour.
188
00:07:56,627 --> 00:07:59,904
Chemical toilet,
that'll reek like buggery
189
00:07:59,929 --> 00:08:01,521
by the end of the night.
190
00:08:01,938 --> 00:08:03,775
There's a Glade on the cistern,
191
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,968
but that's like sticking a
corn plaster on a head wound.
192
00:08:07,431 --> 00:08:09,347
Why do you want to
get married in a shed?
193
00:08:09,372 --> 00:08:11,138
Yeah, I just said that.
194
00:08:11,163 --> 00:08:13,351
Why don't you get married
in a proper building?
195
00:08:13,376 --> 00:08:14,752
Yeah, I said that too.
196
00:08:14,777 --> 00:08:17,044
We thought you'd never
get married, didn't we?
197
00:08:17,069 --> 00:08:20,037
All those girlfriends who
got away because you were...
198
00:08:20,062 --> 00:08:22,652
- Not needy but...
- No, not needy.
199
00:08:22,677 --> 00:08:24,722
- Needy?
- We said not needy.
200
00:08:24,747 --> 00:08:27,165
- Intense.
- Yes, intense.
201
00:08:27,190 --> 00:08:29,567
Your thing was always when you think
202
00:08:29,592 --> 00:08:32,460
someone's gonna leave you,
you won't let go.
203
00:08:32,485 --> 00:08:34,972
Like a ferret down some trousers,
204
00:08:34,997 --> 00:08:37,605
- jaws clamped to the old fella.
- Yeah.
205
00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:39,844
Right.
206
00:08:39,869 --> 00:08:41,535
But here you are getting married,
207
00:08:41,560 --> 00:08:43,183
- and it's a blessing.
- Oh.
208
00:08:43,208 --> 00:08:45,483
It's a blessing that
should happen in a place
209
00:08:45,508 --> 00:08:49,730
with decent heating and an actual floor.
210
00:08:53,949 --> 00:08:56,097
Your mother's just spending a penny.
211
00:08:56,900 --> 00:09:00,134
And by spending a penny
I mean spending a pound,
212
00:09:00,283 --> 00:09:02,402
- if you get my drift.
- Mm-hmm.
213
00:09:03,053 --> 00:09:05,519
Probably best turn the engine off.
214
00:09:10,442 --> 00:09:13,744
I meant to tell you Luke
pulled a boy's hair yesterday.
215
00:09:14,111 --> 00:09:15,417
Why?
216
00:09:16,057 --> 00:09:17,128
I'm not sure.
217
00:09:17,153 --> 00:09:19,617
No, I mean why are
you telling me about it?
218
00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:20,823
Oh...
219
00:09:21,106 --> 00:09:23,838
well, because he shouldn't be
pulling another kid's hair.
220
00:09:25,104 --> 00:09:27,698
It's good he stood up
for himself, though.
221
00:09:28,750 --> 00:09:31,745
- Maybe this boy needed his hair pulled.
- I'm sure he did.
222
00:09:31,770 --> 00:09:34,308
He seems like a spoiled little shit,
but still.
223
00:09:34,858 --> 00:09:36,501
Luke doesn't want to be a victim.
224
00:09:36,526 --> 00:09:39,093
Yeah, he doesn't want
to be a perpetrator either.
225
00:09:39,118 --> 00:09:40,605
You've gotta be one or the other.
226
00:09:40,630 --> 00:09:41,662
No, you haven't.
227
00:09:41,687 --> 00:09:43,508
What sort of nihilistic
bollocks is that?
228
00:09:43,533 --> 00:09:46,534
God, you were right about
that Glade, Jim.
229
00:09:46,559 --> 00:09:48,291
God in heaven.
230
00:09:52,308 --> 00:09:53,748
Thank you for coming in so quickly,
231
00:09:53,773 --> 00:09:55,606
but, uh, when there's been
a major incident,
232
00:09:55,631 --> 00:09:57,043
the school does need to act swiftly.
233
00:09:57,067 --> 00:09:58,627
Oh, my God, is Luke okay?
234
00:09:58,652 --> 00:10:00,191
There was an unprovoked attack.
235
00:10:00,216 --> 00:10:01,949
- Is he hurt?
- Luke was the attacker.
236
00:10:01,974 --> 00:10:04,562
Thank God. That he wasn't hurt.
237
00:10:04,587 --> 00:10:06,187
Sorry, are you sure it was unprovoked?
238
00:10:06,212 --> 00:10:08,476
Hang on, was it Bear?
Because they have a history.
239
00:10:08,501 --> 00:10:10,468
It wasn't Bear. I'm not allowed to say
240
00:10:10,493 --> 00:10:12,814
which child it was... Data protection.
241
00:10:12,839 --> 00:10:14,839
So you probably shouldn't
have said it wasn't Bear.
242
00:10:14,927 --> 00:10:16,026
That's true.
243
00:10:16,051 --> 00:10:19,104
So how did Luke
attack this mystery child?
244
00:10:19,453 --> 00:10:21,955
Luke pinched him. Or her.
245
00:10:21,980 --> 00:10:25,026
- Pinched him?
- Or her. It left a mark.
246
00:10:25,051 --> 00:10:26,932
- A bruise?
- A red mark.
247
00:10:26,957 --> 00:10:29,580
The child in question
was very distressed.
248
00:10:30,431 --> 00:10:31,979
- Well, then.
- Okay, well,
249
00:10:32,004 --> 00:10:33,357
- I'll speak to him.
- Mm-hmm.
250
00:10:33,382 --> 00:10:34,487
Thank you.
251
00:10:34,512 --> 00:10:37,518
As is our policy, Luke will
now be put on a watch list.
252
00:10:38,021 --> 00:10:40,097
- Sor...
- What? Like a terrorist?
253
00:10:40,122 --> 00:10:41,566
It's teacher observation.
254
00:10:41,591 --> 00:10:43,291
Come on, this is...
255
00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:45,492
Imagine it for a pinch.
256
00:10:45,517 --> 00:10:47,572
It's all getting a bit "1984."
257
00:10:47,597 --> 00:10:49,763
We are living in a world
in which nobody is free.
258
00:10:49,788 --> 00:10:51,854
That's from "The Road to Wigan Pier."
259
00:10:51,879 --> 00:10:53,446
Same guy, though, right?
260
00:10:57,705 --> 00:10:59,791
Luke, you can't hurt your friends.
261
00:10:59,816 --> 00:11:01,018
They're not my friends.
262
00:11:01,043 --> 00:11:02,943
Well, you can't hurt anyone, really.
263
00:11:02,968 --> 00:11:04,122
Well, unless they hurt you first.
264
00:11:04,146 --> 00:11:06,080
No, not even then. You tell an adult.
265
00:11:06,105 --> 00:11:08,002
But they don't listen.
266
00:11:08,027 --> 00:11:09,560
Well, we'll listen.
267
00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:11,666
You taught me to stand up for myself.
268
00:11:11,691 --> 00:11:13,971
Of course, and you should.
269
00:11:15,456 --> 00:11:18,846
Everyone runs away from
me in the playground.
270
00:11:22,038 --> 00:11:23,940
Okay, well...
271
00:11:24,345 --> 00:11:25,868
maybe it... maybe it's a game.
272
00:11:25,893 --> 00:11:28,602
It's not. They don't
want to play with me,
273
00:11:28,627 --> 00:11:30,815
so when they ran
away from me this time...
274
00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,268
- Mm-hmm.
- I pinched the slowest one.
275
00:11:33,891 --> 00:11:37,421
- It's not nice to pinch.
- Well, it felt nice,
276
00:11:37,446 --> 00:11:39,056
and it felt nice to pull Bear's hair.
277
00:11:39,081 --> 00:11:41,459
- Well, I get that.
- No, no.
278
00:11:41,484 --> 00:11:44,018
You can't hurt any other
children with your hands.
279
00:11:44,043 --> 00:11:46,564
- Can I hurt them with my feet?
- No. No.
280
00:11:46,589 --> 00:11:49,252
No pinching, no punching,
and no kicking.
281
00:11:49,746 --> 00:11:51,736
- Biting?
- No.
282
00:11:51,761 --> 00:11:53,894
No physical contact at all.
283
00:11:53,919 --> 00:11:57,174
Look, Mummy and Daddy are
gonna sort this out, okay?
284
00:11:57,199 --> 00:11:59,700
We love you so, so much,
285
00:11:59,725 --> 00:12:02,955
and I... I don't want you
to worry about any of it.
286
00:12:03,839 --> 00:12:05,299
I'm not.
287
00:12:07,380 --> 00:12:08,680
Okay.
288
00:12:08,705 --> 00:12:11,698
All right, well, go and...
go and see Granny Leah for a bath.
289
00:12:11,723 --> 00:12:13,289
Good boy.
290
00:12:13,314 --> 00:12:16,080
- My God.
- Hmm.
291
00:12:16,752 --> 00:12:18,118
I can't bear it.
292
00:12:18,143 --> 00:12:20,143
Nobody likes our little boy.
293
00:12:20,168 --> 00:12:21,667
Do you think there's
something wrong with him?
294
00:12:21,691 --> 00:12:23,110
- Like what?
- I don't know,
295
00:12:23,135 --> 00:12:25,192
like he'll become a mass
shooter or something.
296
00:12:25,217 --> 00:12:27,057
I don't think there's
a link between pinching
297
00:12:27,082 --> 00:12:28,639
and shooting, is there?
298
00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:30,574
Lee Harvey Oswald didn't pinch Kennedy
299
00:12:30,599 --> 00:12:32,132
on the arm first, did he?
300
00:12:32,157 --> 00:12:34,088
- Towels?
- Oh, on the towel rack.
301
00:12:34,113 --> 00:12:37,182
- Those are your towels?
- Don't towel shame us, Mum.
302
00:12:37,207 --> 00:12:39,450
We're off to try the
wedding taster menu.
303
00:12:39,475 --> 00:12:41,508
I don't understand why
you want to marry again.
304
00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:42,705
It's not again for me.
305
00:12:42,730 --> 00:12:45,756
Get married a second time
for a mortgage or a passport.
306
00:12:45,781 --> 00:12:47,491
First time round was so lovely, Ally.
307
00:12:47,516 --> 00:12:49,236
Yeah, I wasn't there,
if anyone remembers.
308
00:12:49,261 --> 00:12:52,062
The setting, the reception,
the lighting.
309
00:12:52,087 --> 00:12:53,731
The lighting?
310
00:12:53,756 --> 00:12:55,733
Oh, Christ,
this is about my photos, isn't it?
311
00:12:55,758 --> 00:12:58,225
I looked amazing in them, Ally.
I was 15 years younger.
312
00:12:58,250 --> 00:13:00,213
People asked me if I was your sister,
313
00:13:00,238 --> 00:13:02,994
and only part of that was
because you looked a bit baggy.
314
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:07,111
Wah-hah. Don't even...
315
00:13:07,136 --> 00:13:09,104
- It's just exhausting.
- I know that.
316
00:13:16,335 --> 00:13:19,300
It's like deconstructed
sushi but cooked.
317
00:13:19,521 --> 00:13:21,675
I mean, it's quite nice, but...
318
00:13:21,977 --> 00:13:24,095
It will be bigger than
this at the wedding.
319
00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:25,998
I mean, terribly, this is
just 'cause it's a taster menu?
320
00:13:26,022 --> 00:13:27,799
I hope so. I thought you're
supposed to starve yourself
321
00:13:27,823 --> 00:13:29,487
before a wedding, not at it.
322
00:13:29,512 --> 00:13:31,503
Excuse me. Is this the actual size
323
00:13:31,528 --> 00:13:33,138
it will be at the wedding,
or is this smaller?
324
00:13:33,162 --> 00:13:34,954
- Actual size.
- This is actual size?
325
00:13:34,979 --> 00:13:36,497
- Yeah.
- It's actual size.
326
00:13:36,522 --> 00:13:38,009
- I heard.
- I... I...
327
00:13:38,034 --> 00:13:39,620
I feel like the lamb felt bigger.
328
00:13:39,645 --> 00:13:41,946
Did you think that?
Did it feel bigger to you?
329
00:13:41,971 --> 00:13:43,648
Because you get more accessories
there, don't you?
330
00:13:43,672 --> 00:13:44,916
The potato, the carrots...
331
00:13:44,940 --> 00:13:46,580
Darren's offered me a 60,000-pound bonus
332
00:13:46,605 --> 00:13:49,190
to take a lead role in
the setting up the Berlin studio.
333
00:13:49,810 --> 00:13:53,657
Fuck my old boots, 60? Six-zero?
334
00:13:53,682 --> 00:13:56,227
I know, but it would mean
being away during the week
335
00:13:56,252 --> 00:13:57,618
for at least a month.
336
00:13:57,643 --> 00:13:58,956
Oh, okay.
337
00:13:59,809 --> 00:14:01,665
Maybe six weeks,
338
00:14:01,690 --> 00:14:04,300
and then three days
a fortnight after that.
339
00:14:05,209 --> 00:14:08,112
- How is the salmon?
- It is lovely.
340
00:14:08,137 --> 00:14:10,018
Can we try the chicken?
341
00:14:10,191 --> 00:14:11,761
Good times.
342
00:14:12,843 --> 00:14:14,995
So... so... when-when
would you have to go?
343
00:14:15,026 --> 00:14:17,048
- Monday.
- Monday?
344
00:14:17,073 --> 00:14:18,605
But that's fucking Monday.
345
00:14:18,630 --> 00:14:20,590
I know, and I've already
told Darren I can't go,
346
00:14:20,615 --> 00:14:22,653
and now Luke's going all
chocolate orange on us.
347
00:14:22,678 --> 00:14:25,279
I'm not exactly gonna leave you
to cope with that on your own.
348
00:14:25,304 --> 00:14:27,066
- You mean "Clockwork Orange."
- What did I say?
349
00:14:27,090 --> 00:14:28,181
Doesn't matter. You...
350
00:14:28,206 --> 00:14:29,894
do you want to go to Berlin?
351
00:14:29,919 --> 00:14:31,485
Chicken with a side of dauphinoise
352
00:14:31,510 --> 00:14:34,871
and a pop of leek in bacon sauce.
353
00:14:34,896 --> 00:14:36,567
Actual size.
354
00:14:38,012 --> 00:14:39,870
I'm happy as I am, you know?
355
00:14:39,895 --> 00:14:41,418
I don't want anything to change.
356
00:14:41,851 --> 00:14:44,434
- Okay. So you said no?
- Yeah.
357
00:14:44,459 --> 00:14:46,740
Yeah, which is... which is
the right thing. It's all good.
358
00:14:47,193 --> 00:14:48,425
Right.
359
00:14:52,394 --> 00:14:54,518
- It is quite small.
- It's fucking tiny.
360
00:15:03,029 --> 00:15:04,295
- Hey.
- Luke's teacher
361
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,030
sent a note home in
his observation book.
362
00:15:06,055 --> 00:15:07,375
Oh, Christ. What's happened now?
363
00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:09,731
He spat at someone.
364
00:15:09,860 --> 00:15:11,469
Right.
365
00:15:11,494 --> 00:15:14,004
Well, that's enough, isn't it?
Spitting is fucking awful.
366
00:15:14,029 --> 00:15:16,663
Uh, yeah, it is, but
we've got to hand it to him.
367
00:15:16,688 --> 00:15:18,142
- He's being clever.
- How?
368
00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:19,845
We said not to touch
anyone with his hands.
369
00:15:19,869 --> 00:15:21,146
He's touching them with his saliva.
370
00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:23,395
Sorry, are you actually being serious?
371
00:15:23,629 --> 00:15:25,195
Yeah.
372
00:15:25,407 --> 00:15:26,650
Ally, it's spitting.
373
00:15:26,675 --> 00:15:28,285
It's not exactly knife crime, is it?
374
00:15:28,310 --> 00:15:31,411
It's gross,
and it is completely unacceptable.
375
00:15:31,436 --> 00:15:33,958
Thank God I didn't take that
fucking job. I will deal with...
376
00:15:33,983 --> 00:15:36,650
No, I'll deal with it.
I'll deal with it.
377
00:15:36,675 --> 00:15:38,462
You're right. It's awful.
378
00:15:38,487 --> 00:15:40,043
I'll talk to him.
379
00:15:40,246 --> 00:15:41,632
You spat at someone?
380
00:15:41,657 --> 00:15:43,346
You dick, why would you do that?
381
00:15:43,371 --> 00:15:45,659
You said not to touch anyone.
382
00:15:45,761 --> 00:15:48,529
Right, is this behavior
because you've picked up
383
00:15:48,554 --> 00:15:50,063
on what's happening with Mummy's work?
384
00:15:50,087 --> 00:15:52,106
What's happening with Mummy's work?
385
00:15:52,644 --> 00:15:54,111
Right.
386
00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:58,739
Because if it is about that,
right, we can tell the school
387
00:15:58,764 --> 00:16:01,418
that you're under stress,
and they won't punish you.
388
00:16:01,443 --> 00:16:03,432
They'll just talk to you softly.
389
00:16:03,457 --> 00:16:05,051
Is it because of that?
390
00:16:05,427 --> 00:16:07,725
- Yes, it is.
- Good man.
391
00:16:07,750 --> 00:16:09,283
And if you keep upsetting other kids,
392
00:16:09,308 --> 00:16:11,248
I'm gonna burn all your toys.
393
00:16:28,262 --> 00:16:29,495
You awake?
394
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:43,719
Decision time.
395
00:16:43,744 --> 00:16:47,680
Well, that new grant-making
trust Helen mentioned,
396
00:16:47,705 --> 00:16:49,808
I think we could get
a taste of that money.
397
00:16:49,833 --> 00:16:51,696
- Mm-hmm.
- And...
398
00:16:51,866 --> 00:16:54,546
- I've already taken a pay freeze.
- Admirable.
399
00:16:54,571 --> 00:16:56,641
So you might not have
to let anyone go...
400
00:16:56,666 --> 00:16:58,766
- Great.
- If you'd be prepared
401
00:16:58,798 --> 00:17:00,716
- to take the same freeze.
- Ben, sack Ben.
402
00:17:00,741 --> 00:17:02,207
- He's fucking useless.
- Really?
403
00:17:02,232 --> 00:17:05,457
No. No. I'll take the freeze.
404
00:17:05,482 --> 00:17:07,282
I don't want to put anyone out of a job.
405
00:17:07,307 --> 00:17:09,574
Admirable.
406
00:17:16,312 --> 00:17:19,504
I'm at the top of my bounce,
407
00:17:19,529 --> 00:17:21,763
and I've not even bounced that high.
408
00:17:21,788 --> 00:17:23,021
What?
409
00:17:25,442 --> 00:17:28,977
Unless I change jobs, right,
410
00:17:29,002 --> 00:17:33,652
I'm not gonna get a pay
rise for three years,
411
00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:34,909
and I'm not gonna change jobs
412
00:17:34,934 --> 00:17:36,800
because no fucker is
gonna take me on at my age
413
00:17:36,825 --> 00:17:38,357
and pay me what I'm getting now,
414
00:17:38,382 --> 00:17:41,182
so if our financial situation
is going to improve,
415
00:17:41,207 --> 00:17:43,637
that needs to be down to
you and what you're doing.
416
00:17:44,043 --> 00:17:46,168
You need to go to Berlin.
417
00:17:50,327 --> 00:17:51,871
Well, how would you manage on your own?
418
00:17:51,895 --> 00:17:55,764
I wouldn't, would I?
It'd be a living hell.
419
00:17:55,789 --> 00:17:57,684
But Mum would help out.
420
00:17:58,435 --> 00:17:59,678
And it's not forever, is it?
421
00:17:59,703 --> 00:18:01,989
- Of course not.
- Mm.
422
00:18:04,974 --> 00:18:07,215
You want to do it, don't you?
423
00:18:15,085 --> 00:18:16,926
Mm.
424
00:18:17,171 --> 00:18:19,067
And you still want to be my wife?
425
00:18:19,456 --> 00:18:21,266
- Yes.
- Okay, then marry me now,
426
00:18:21,291 --> 00:18:22,800
before you go away, let's just...
427
00:18:22,825 --> 00:18:24,918
sign on the dotted line and get pissed.
428
00:18:26,129 --> 00:18:27,362
Mm.
429
00:18:29,132 --> 00:18:30,865
Did you tell me this in bed so...
430
00:18:30,890 --> 00:18:32,584
So I could get some sex out of it.
431
00:18:32,609 --> 00:18:34,770
I'm not fucking stupid.
432
00:18:40,544 --> 00:18:42,854
It won't be for long, I promise.
433
00:18:42,879 --> 00:18:45,390
Are you leaving because I spat at Angel?
434
00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:47,669
Oh, of course not. No, don't be silly.
435
00:18:47,694 --> 00:18:50,426
- Angel? Jesus.
- It is just that...
436
00:18:50,865 --> 00:18:52,431
Well, with more money
437
00:18:52,456 --> 00:18:55,534
we can go on, like,
nicer holidays and things.
438
00:18:55,559 --> 00:18:57,592
- Mm, Disneyland.
- Well.
439
00:18:57,617 --> 00:18:59,051
Paris.
440
00:18:59,653 --> 00:19:02,035
I'm gonna miss you both so,
441
00:19:02,060 --> 00:19:05,095
so, so much, but we can
speak on the computer,
442
00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:07,279
so you'll see my face every day.
443
00:19:07,304 --> 00:19:09,401
But we won't be able to touch you.
444
00:19:09,426 --> 00:19:11,356
Or smell you.
445
00:19:11,381 --> 00:19:14,231
- Oh.
- Hey, look, look,
446
00:19:14,256 --> 00:19:15,854
you'll still have me, right?
447
00:19:15,879 --> 00:19:17,912
I'll be here to look after you.
448
00:19:17,937 --> 00:19:19,176
Just you?
449
00:19:19,201 --> 00:19:21,926
Yes, just me, your father, hi.
450
00:19:34,431 --> 00:19:36,223
- We're really doing it.
- We really are.
451
00:19:36,248 --> 00:19:38,044
- And now look at me.
- We're not wedding wankers.
452
00:19:38,068 --> 00:19:40,410
- No, we're just wankers.
- Hey!
453
00:19:40,435 --> 00:19:43,215
- Oh.
- You do it after, Mum.
454
00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:45,388
Actually, you're not allowed
to throw confetti anymore.
455
00:19:45,412 --> 00:19:46,785
Isn't it politically correct?
456
00:19:46,810 --> 00:19:48,021
No, it's not good for the environment.
457
00:19:48,045 --> 00:19:51,348
Apparently fish choke on it, or pigeons.
458
00:19:51,373 --> 00:19:52,724
Right, kids, are you ready to see
459
00:19:52,749 --> 00:19:53,869
Mummy and Daddy get married?
460
00:19:53,894 --> 00:19:56,418
- Can we play on our iPad?
- Nope. Let's go.
461
00:20:04,832 --> 00:20:07,455
- Hi, I'm so, so sorry I'm late.
- Hey.
462
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:08,931
- That's all right. Hello.
- Hello.
463
00:20:08,956 --> 00:20:10,408
- Hello.
- Oh.
464
00:20:10,433 --> 00:20:12,431
- You okay?
- So what we seeing?
465
00:20:12,456 --> 00:20:15,313
We're gonna see that one,
"Open House." It's German.
466
00:20:15,338 --> 00:20:17,283
Oh, sounds really pretentious.
467
00:20:17,308 --> 00:20:20,085
- What's it about?
- I don't know, German things?
468
00:20:20,110 --> 00:20:23,689
Probably the war. I've heard
it was an abyss of anxiety, so.
469
00:20:23,714 --> 00:20:25,924
Well, that sounds like
the perfect first date film.
470
00:20:25,949 --> 00:20:27,470
That's what I thought.
471
00:20:27,495 --> 00:20:29,017
Uh, should we go in?
472
00:20:29,042 --> 00:20:32,831
Well, we could, or we could,
uh, get drunk on cheap wine
473
00:20:32,856 --> 00:20:34,856
in the park and throw
chips at the ducks.
474
00:20:37,479 --> 00:20:40,064
Yeah. Looks like it might
be a bit drizzly again.
475
00:20:40,089 --> 00:20:42,236
Yeah, but this is the moment, Paul.
476
00:20:42,261 --> 00:20:43,708
This is the moment where I found out
477
00:20:43,733 --> 00:20:46,478
if you're gonna live up
to that mind-blowing sex
478
00:20:46,503 --> 00:20:47,702
that we had at Lacey's party.
479
00:20:47,727 --> 00:20:49,714
- Oy, yoy.
- Or if you're gonna turn out
480
00:20:49,739 --> 00:20:51,260
to be a drizzly wanker.
481
00:20:53,009 --> 00:20:54,338
Well?
482
00:21:05,378 --> 00:21:09,801
See? This proves I'm not leaving you.
483
00:21:09,826 --> 00:21:10,960
Yeah, but you are leaving me.
484
00:21:10,984 --> 00:21:12,504
Sure, I'm literally leaving you,
485
00:21:12,529 --> 00:21:14,762
but I'm not literally leaving you.
486
00:21:14,787 --> 00:21:16,575
- Did I miss it?
- Yeah, you did, yeah.
487
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,077
- Yeah.
- Mind you, second time round,
488
00:21:18,101 --> 00:21:19,200
never as emotional.
489
00:21:19,225 --> 00:21:21,746
- So where are we eating?
- Nanny!
490
00:21:21,849 --> 00:21:22,849
- Ava.
- Hey, Darren,
491
00:21:22,874 --> 00:21:24,475
- I didn't know you were coming.
- Oh, I'm not a guest.
492
00:21:24,499 --> 00:21:26,154
I'm a interloper.
493
00:21:26,179 --> 00:21:27,255
Sods all, I'm afraid,
494
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:28,991
but the money guys pulled
the meeting forward.
495
00:21:29,015 --> 00:21:30,685
What? What? What are you talking about?
496
00:21:30,710 --> 00:21:31,843
To when?
497
00:21:31,868 --> 00:21:33,763
- First thing tomorrow.
- Oh, no, come on.
498
00:21:33,788 --> 00:21:35,053
We should get on the next flight.
499
00:21:35,077 --> 00:21:36,592
I'm so sorry. You must want to kill me.
500
00:21:36,616 --> 00:21:38,279
Yeah, I do, a bit.
501
00:21:40,098 --> 00:21:41,451
Paul?
502
00:21:41,476 --> 00:21:43,873
Look, go. It's fine.
503
00:21:43,898 --> 00:21:45,695
But I haven't even got any
of my stuff. I can't.
504
00:21:45,719 --> 00:21:47,529
Oh, Berlin is fantastic for shopping.
505
00:21:47,554 --> 00:21:49,771
You know, all-new wardrobe,
reinvent yourself.
506
00:21:49,796 --> 00:21:51,329
Ditch old Ally.
507
00:21:51,354 --> 00:21:54,380
- Listen, I love you.
- I love you too.
508
00:21:56,847 --> 00:21:58,966
- God. Kids, come over here.
- Hey, come here.
509
00:21:58,991 --> 00:22:01,258
Listen, so Mummy has to go
somewhere, all right?
510
00:22:01,283 --> 00:22:03,669
Eat your veg. Listen to Daddy,
and look after him,
511
00:22:03,694 --> 00:22:05,060
and mind the roads, all right?
512
00:22:05,085 --> 00:22:06,435
I love you.
513
00:22:06,706 --> 00:22:08,560
Are you really sure about this?
514
00:22:08,585 --> 00:22:10,420
Yes, I'm sure. Go.
515
00:22:10,890 --> 00:22:12,755
- Love you.
- I will take care of her.
516
00:22:12,780 --> 00:22:13,869
Not that she's a possession
517
00:22:13,894 --> 00:22:15,138
or that I own her or that you do.
518
00:22:15,162 --> 00:22:17,209
She's free to do as she pleases.
519
00:22:17,234 --> 00:22:18,960
Sorry, this is maybe
a throwaway farewell.
520
00:22:18,985 --> 00:22:21,099
- Happy wedding day.
- Yeah.
521
00:22:21,436 --> 00:22:23,021
Okay, let's go.
522
00:22:24,754 --> 00:22:26,841
Where's your new wife off to?
523
00:22:26,866 --> 00:22:29,365
Oh, she's going on
a honeymoon with her boss.
524
00:22:40,634 --> 00:22:43,404
This is too... Oh, man.
525
00:22:43,429 --> 00:22:44,857
Oh, for f...
526
00:22:45,550 --> 00:22:48,763
- Mummy knows who Jelly is.
- Well, can you describe her?
527
00:22:48,788 --> 00:22:52,349
- She's Jelly.
- Brilliant. Anything else?
528
00:22:52,374 --> 00:22:55,175
A dolly, a teddy bear, an actual jelly?
529
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,162
- Mummy knows.
- Yeah, I know Mummy knows.
530
00:22:57,187 --> 00:23:00,288
I know that, but Mummy's
not here, is she, Ava?
531
00:23:00,313 --> 00:23:01,713
Oh, God.
532
00:23:03,551 --> 00:23:07,153
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but hey,
533
00:23:07,419 --> 00:23:11,654
do you remember what
Mummy said on the phone...
534
00:23:13,708 --> 00:23:17,343
when she said that
535
00:23:17,593 --> 00:23:21,662
even though she isn't really here,
536
00:23:21,687 --> 00:23:23,120
actually,
537
00:23:23,145 --> 00:23:30,130
she also sort of is because
she's always thinking about us?
538
00:23:30,668 --> 00:23:32,367
Okay?
539
00:23:33,100 --> 00:23:35,584
I don't remember Mummy saying that.
540
00:23:35,609 --> 00:23:37,275
Go to sleep.
541
00:23:37,998 --> 00:23:41,998
Not surprisingly, we know
that people live beside them.
542
00:23:42,023 --> 00:23:44,896
Way back in the day from
hunting and gathering,
543
00:23:44,921 --> 00:23:49,373
when Britain was a wild,
less populated island,
544
00:23:49,398 --> 00:23:51,108
these would have been...
545
00:23:51,632 --> 00:23:52,888
In the landscape.
546
00:23:52,913 --> 00:23:54,913
I want Mummy!
547
00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:58,435
Yeah, don't we fucking all, mate?
548
00:24:04,794 --> 00:24:08,194
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com