1 00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:15,649 [minister] Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God 2 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:17,585 of His great mercy 3 00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:22,489 to take unto Himself the soul of our dear sister Christine, 4 00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:25,592 we therefore commit her body to the ground. 5 00:00:27,394 --> 00:00:31,632 Earth to earth, ashes to ashes, 6 00:00:31,665 --> 00:00:33,667 dust to dust, 7 00:00:35,135 --> 00:00:37,504 in sure and certain hope 8 00:00:37,537 --> 00:00:40,473 of the resurrection to eternal life. 9 00:00:41,608 --> 00:00:42,610 Amen. 10 00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:45,278 [mourners] Amen. 11 00:00:50,150 --> 00:00:51,452 [Jackie] Kathy, love, 12 00:00:51,485 --> 00:00:54,455 sorry to bother you, but do you think 13 00:00:54,488 --> 00:00:58,192 I could just go back and say a final goodbye to your mum? 14 00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,660 [Kathy] Of course, Jackie, you must. 15 00:00:59,693 --> 00:01:01,629 You meant so much to her. 16 00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:02,796 Thanks, love. 17 00:01:04,798 --> 00:01:06,132 Go. You go on. 18 00:01:25,185 --> 00:01:27,755 So, Chrissy... 19 00:01:27,788 --> 00:01:29,155 here we are. 20 00:01:30,290 --> 00:01:33,294 And I just couldn't bear to leave your graveside 21 00:01:33,327 --> 00:01:35,161 without saying this. 22 00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:41,134 I'm glad you're fucking well dead. 23 00:01:50,644 --> 00:01:52,112 [Ally] When did we last decorate Ava's room? 24 00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:53,614 Dad helped me paint the ceiling. 25 00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:55,649 That shows you how long ago it was. 26 00:01:55,682 --> 00:01:56,750 -Jim up a ladder. -[laughs] 27 00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:58,218 -Christ. -Yeah. 28 00:01:58,251 --> 00:02:00,154 Should get a new bed as well 'cause she's had that 29 00:02:00,187 --> 00:02:02,089 since she was eight or nine. 30 00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:05,125 So, a... a... a double bed, honey? 31 00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:09,697 Yeah. Yeah, a double bed. 32 00:02:09,730 --> 00:02:11,098 -That makes... -Mm-hmm. 33 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,534 That makes sense for her now. A double bed. Yeah. 34 00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:17,438 Is either of us gonna mention how... significant that is? 35 00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:20,507 Uh, what, that our little girl's becoming a sexually active woman 36 00:02:20,540 --> 00:02:22,409 and where the fuck has the time gone? 37 00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:25,179 -Yeah, that sort of thing. -I just mentioned it, so... 38 00:02:25,212 --> 00:02:27,614 Good. That's all covered then. [groans] 39 00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:30,050 [laughter] 40 00:02:30,083 --> 00:02:32,253 -[Jay cooing] -[Jackie] Oh. 41 00:02:32,286 --> 00:02:34,154 How old is he now, Maya? 42 00:02:34,187 --> 00:02:36,056 Uh, just over five and a half months. 43 00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:37,157 -Mm. -Yeah. 44 00:02:37,190 --> 00:02:39,193 -He's very bonny. -[chuckles] 45 00:02:39,226 --> 00:02:42,263 They used to have competitions, didn't they? "Bonniest Baby," 46 00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:44,431 like Miss World, but for babies. 47 00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:46,667 -Jay would win hands down. -Yeah. 48 00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:49,503 'Cause he's a gorgeous boy, ain't you, Jay? 49 00:02:49,536 --> 00:02:52,139 Are you managing to study all right at the college? 50 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,241 Uh... just about. 51 00:02:54,274 --> 00:02:56,176 I can bring Jay onto campus for tutorials, 52 00:02:56,209 --> 00:02:58,011 and all my lectures stream online. 53 00:02:58,612 --> 00:03:01,448 And how is it with Luke being up in Liverpool? 54 00:03:01,481 --> 00:03:04,385 -Manchester. -Uh, Manchester, I mean. 55 00:03:04,418 --> 00:03:06,420 Uh, it's... it's not ideal, 56 00:03:06,453 --> 00:03:08,422 but I'm really glad he was given his place back 57 00:03:08,455 --> 00:03:09,656 -since he turned it down. -[doorbell rings] 58 00:03:10,657 --> 00:03:11,791 Excuse me. 59 00:03:14,094 --> 00:03:17,131 But yeah, he... he can't afford the train or to use the car, 60 00:03:17,164 --> 00:03:19,767 so he just lives on coaches, 61 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:22,069 and it's over six hours each way, door to door. 62 00:03:22,102 --> 00:03:24,305 Do they have toilets on these coaches? 63 00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:26,407 -[chuckles] Yeah. -Thank Christ. 64 00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:27,608 -[indistinct conversation] -[both chuckle] 65 00:03:27,641 --> 00:03:29,309 Look who I found. 66 00:03:29,743 --> 00:03:32,146 -Aha. -[Maya] Oh, hi. 67 00:03:32,179 --> 00:03:33,213 [chuckles] 68 00:03:33,246 --> 00:03:35,182 They're taking me out for lunch today. 69 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:37,585 -Lovely. -[Ava] Holly's treat. 70 00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,353 I'm off to a salon in Brighton for a couple of weeks 71 00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:41,088 to cover for one of their stylists. 72 00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:43,057 They pay me really nice money, so I'm gonna take us 73 00:03:43,090 --> 00:03:45,059 to that new Lebanese place by the park. 74 00:03:45,092 --> 00:03:46,327 -Oh. -Classy. 75 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:48,562 -[Jay fussing] -How old is he now, Maya? 76 00:03:50,197 --> 00:03:51,498 Uh, five... five and a half months. 77 00:03:51,531 --> 00:03:53,100 -[babbling] -[Maya] Yeah. 78 00:03:53,133 --> 00:03:54,034 [Jackie] Oh. 79 00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:56,337 Right. Where is Jay's car seat? 80 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:59,105 -Right over here. -Oh, I'll get it. 81 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:04,712 [packaging rustling] 82 00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:06,814 [crunching] 83 00:04:06,847 --> 00:04:11,585 [indistinct conversations] 84 00:04:11,618 --> 00:04:12,786 [cellphone beeps] 85 00:04:12,819 --> 00:04:15,055 [automated voice] Warning. Low battery. 86 00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:20,393 [continues crunching] 87 00:04:22,229 --> 00:04:24,531 Excuse me, pal. Do you know how long we got left to go? 88 00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:30,037 Um... just over four hours till we get into Victoria. 89 00:04:30,070 --> 00:04:33,106 Shit. Really? Four hours? 90 00:04:33,540 --> 00:04:35,509 Feels like I've already been on here four hours. 91 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:37,077 [resumes crunching] 92 00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:43,149 -Do you want a crisp? -Uh, no, you're all right. 93 00:04:45,485 --> 00:04:47,821 Not bothering you, am I, eating 'em? 94 00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:49,490 [crunches] 95 00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:52,393 No. No. All good. 96 00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:54,728 [indistinct conversation continues] 97 00:04:54,761 --> 00:04:56,429 [can top pops open] 98 00:04:58,131 --> 00:05:00,667 [slurping] 99 00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:05,105 -[indistinct conversations] -Um... 100 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:08,042 -Do you mind if I... -No, not at all. 101 00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:09,209 Thank you. 102 00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:12,746 I'm Rose, Chrissy's cousin. 103 00:05:12,779 --> 00:05:16,149 Pleased to meet you. I'm Jim, and this is Jackie. 104 00:05:17,351 --> 00:05:20,086 And how did you know Chrissy? 105 00:05:20,787 --> 00:05:23,223 She was a friend of mine for many years. 106 00:05:24,257 --> 00:05:25,726 Oh, yes, of course, Jackie. 107 00:05:25,759 --> 00:05:28,228 I've heard of you. You're one of her best friends. 108 00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:31,198 You'd visit her in the hospice towards the end. 109 00:05:31,231 --> 00:05:32,700 Yes, I went a lot. 110 00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:34,168 Mm. 111 00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:37,037 So, you must have known Chrissy well, too, Jim. 112 00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:39,373 -Yes, I did. -Mm. 113 00:05:39,406 --> 00:05:43,177 She was one of the sweetest people I ever knew. 114 00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:46,113 I mean, honest, no side to her. 115 00:05:46,146 --> 00:05:47,681 It's dreadful to think that she's gone. [sighs] 116 00:05:47,714 --> 00:05:49,717 Very sad. 117 00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:53,119 I might just get a bite to eat from the buffet. 118 00:05:54,588 --> 00:05:56,624 Try the ham, Jackie. It's a lovely bit 119 00:05:56,657 --> 00:05:59,293 of old-fashioned, thick-cut butcher's ham. 120 00:05:59,326 --> 00:06:02,062 [indistinct conversations continue] 121 00:06:02,095 --> 00:06:04,298 I thought it was a good service. 122 00:06:04,331 --> 00:06:06,066 Yeah, and good, solid hymns, too, 123 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:09,370 like the ones we used to sing at primary school. [chuckles] 124 00:06:09,403 --> 00:06:11,138 I don't like these modern hymns. 125 00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:14,141 No, too many tambourines, 126 00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:16,710 lyrics about being filled with joy. 127 00:06:16,743 --> 00:06:20,547 Exactly. A good hymn should make you remember your sins. 128 00:06:23,850 --> 00:06:26,220 -I like decorating. This is fun. -[Paul chuckles] 129 00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:28,222 Maybe you should do it for a living, like Maya's dad. 130 00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:30,457 I reckon I could rock a white van. 131 00:06:30,490 --> 00:06:34,328 [chuckles] Totally. Overalls, headscarf, lippy, 132 00:06:34,361 --> 00:06:37,197 smoking a rollie, cutting people up on roundabouts. [chuckles] 133 00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:39,233 Right. Um, Holly, can you give me a hand with that bed? 134 00:06:39,266 --> 00:06:40,401 -Oh, yeah. -Shifting it over here. 135 00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:41,635 -I need to get... -Yeah, sure. 136 00:06:41,668 --> 00:06:42,803 to the skirting board. Thanks, love. 137 00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,171 -Just this way. -Lift. 138 00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:45,439 Top. Oh. 139 00:06:45,472 --> 00:06:47,775 -She's strong. She's strong. -[laughs] 140 00:06:47,808 --> 00:06:50,377 We're getting you a new bed, by the way, Ava. 141 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,646 -Great. -[Paul] Uh, yeah. 142 00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:54,481 Yeah, it's the bigger bed. 143 00:06:54,514 --> 00:06:57,051 [clicks teeth] Double bed, if you like, uh, 144 00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:59,486 'cause there's... there's room, so... yeah. 145 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,521 Thanks. That'll be brilliant. 146 00:07:05,192 --> 00:07:06,327 Who'd like a tea? 147 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:08,162 -Yes, please. -Oh, please, I'm gasping. 148 00:07:08,195 --> 00:07:10,064 -[Ava] Yes, thank you. -[Paul] Oh. Thank you very much. 149 00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:11,398 I'll... I'll make a pot, bring it up. 150 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:17,171 Thanks for the double bed. 151 00:07:17,204 --> 00:07:18,606 And for not being awkward talking about it. 152 00:07:18,639 --> 00:07:20,608 -You're welcome. -We were a bit awkward. 153 00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:22,543 -[laughs] -Yeah, but it's fine. [laughs] 154 00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:24,278 Good. [chuckles] 155 00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:26,780 It's companionship as much as anything, isn't it? 156 00:07:26,813 --> 00:07:28,215 -[chuckles] -[Paul grunts] 157 00:07:35,289 --> 00:07:37,291 Well, they've been around forever, 158 00:07:37,324 --> 00:07:40,394 but they still seem like a novelty to me, 159 00:07:40,427 --> 00:07:42,229 like dimmer switches. 160 00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:45,566 Jackie, will I ever be able to make it up to you, 161 00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:46,834 make amends? 162 00:07:46,867 --> 00:07:50,337 No. No, you won't. 163 00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:52,406 Right. 164 00:07:52,439 --> 00:07:55,276 We'll muddle along like we always have, 165 00:07:55,309 --> 00:07:57,210 till one of us dies. 166 00:07:57,878 --> 00:08:00,147 But you having an affair with Chrissy, 167 00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:03,250 my best friend, and you never telling me, 168 00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:05,119 you can't make up for that. 169 00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:06,787 There's no redemption there. 170 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,823 -I'm so sorry, Jackie. -No, I know you are. 171 00:08:09,856 --> 00:08:12,626 You tried to top yourself, your daft sod, 172 00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:16,163 but I'm just telling the truth. 173 00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:17,797 And we'll be fine. 174 00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,834 In a few months, we won't mention this. 175 00:08:20,867 --> 00:08:23,404 We'll watch Midsomer Murders. 176 00:08:23,437 --> 00:08:25,139 You'll make me laugh, 177 00:08:25,172 --> 00:08:27,608 and I'll do us some cheese on toast, 178 00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:30,744 but you can't undo what's happened. 179 00:08:32,279 --> 00:08:36,082 That is chiseled like a fucking headstone. 180 00:08:39,453 --> 00:08:41,121 Mmm. 181 00:08:41,154 --> 00:08:44,724 [mouth full] Rose was right. That's a lovely bit of ham. 182 00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,132 [door closes] 183 00:08:52,165 --> 00:08:54,501 Hi. Sorry I'm late. 184 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,470 The, uh, the M6 was a disaster, and then the coach-- 185 00:08:56,503 --> 00:08:58,639 -[whispers] Shh! -[whispers] Sorry. 186 00:08:58,672 --> 00:09:01,141 Sorry. Jay's just gone down on the sofa. 187 00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:02,743 He's barely slept for like a day or so. 188 00:09:02,776 --> 00:09:04,211 [sighs] Oh, okay. 189 00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:06,146 Sorry. Hi. 190 00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:07,113 [exhales] 191 00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:13,354 Do you wanna come in and see him? 192 00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:15,188 -Yeah. -Okay. 193 00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:23,564 -I haven't cuddled him in days. -I know. 194 00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:25,332 But he'll be awake soon enough. 195 00:09:25,833 --> 00:09:28,068 He's a very wakey baby at the minute. 196 00:09:28,101 --> 00:09:29,236 [chuckles] 197 00:09:29,269 --> 00:09:30,737 When do you have to head back? 198 00:09:31,471 --> 00:09:34,275 Um... I need to get the 6:00 a.m. coach 199 00:09:34,308 --> 00:09:36,443 to make my 12:30 lecture. 200 00:09:36,777 --> 00:09:38,712 -6:00? -I know. 201 00:09:39,380 --> 00:09:40,781 -Luke, should you maybe-- -[raises voice] I don't... 202 00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:42,249 [whispers] Sorry. I, um... 203 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:47,254 I don't want to miss seeing him or you. 204 00:09:47,287 --> 00:09:48,622 I don't want to miss being a dad. 205 00:09:48,655 --> 00:09:50,491 No, I know, Lukey, but you're always 206 00:09:50,524 --> 00:09:52,259 on the road, and you're always exhausted. 207 00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:53,761 I just wanna be with you and Jay. 208 00:09:53,794 --> 00:09:56,196 Yeah, and I understand that, but... 209 00:09:57,531 --> 00:10:00,767 maybe you should just think about coming back a bit less. 210 00:10:18,151 --> 00:10:22,256 [metal tapping] 211 00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:23,223 [sighs] 212 00:10:36,270 --> 00:10:37,437 [exhales deeply] 213 00:10:39,673 --> 00:10:41,441 [door opens] 214 00:10:50,651 --> 00:10:52,219 [toilet flushes] 215 00:10:52,252 --> 00:10:53,520 [door opens] 216 00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,373 [exhales deeply] 217 00:11:12,406 --> 00:11:14,608 -[birds chirping] -[Jackie] Did I ask you how 218 00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:16,143 Paul was yesterday? 219 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:20,748 Yes. They'd been painting Ava's room, remember? 220 00:11:20,781 --> 00:11:25,219 Oh, yeah. Yeah, I remember. And I was staying with Holly. 221 00:11:25,252 --> 00:11:26,519 That's right. 222 00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:34,461 Jim, can I ask you something? 223 00:11:35,262 --> 00:11:36,463 Go on. 224 00:11:40,601 --> 00:11:41,601 Where am I? 225 00:11:48,308 --> 00:11:50,277 We're in our flat, love. 226 00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:51,311 Oh? 227 00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:55,282 Yeah. The Morrison Estate one? 228 00:11:55,315 --> 00:11:57,751 No, love, our new sheltered housing. 229 00:11:57,784 --> 00:12:01,488 Oh! Yes. Yes, Of course. 230 00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:04,625 -How silly of me. -Not silly at all. 231 00:12:04,658 --> 00:12:06,360 We all need to know where we are. 232 00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:08,762 I got confused for a second. 233 00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:11,131 I've been confused since decimalization, 234 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:14,167 -so we're well suited. -[sighs] 235 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:23,076 I'm not right, am I, Jim? 236 00:12:23,911 --> 00:12:27,248 You'll be fine, love. We'll get along fine. 237 00:12:27,281 --> 00:12:29,083 I don't wanna see a doctor. 238 00:12:29,116 --> 00:12:32,286 [Jim] We won't see a doctor. Can't anyway. 239 00:12:32,319 --> 00:12:34,355 You have to wait three weeks at that new practice, 240 00:12:34,388 --> 00:12:36,089 and then it's just a phone call. 241 00:12:36,723 --> 00:12:40,060 -Thanks, Jim. -It's all right, love. 242 00:12:41,028 --> 00:12:45,065 -How's your show? -[sighs] Dog shit. [laughs] 243 00:12:45,566 --> 00:12:47,167 -But it'll do. -Mm. 244 00:12:57,511 --> 00:12:59,747 -It's the worst of both worlds. -Yeah, it does sound rough. 245 00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:02,315 I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time, Lukey. 246 00:13:03,517 --> 00:13:05,386 You're polishing off those custard creams, 247 00:13:05,419 --> 00:13:08,155 -aren't you, mate? -Mm. I sometimes forget to eat 248 00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:09,623 'cause I'm always rushing to be somewhere. 249 00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,125 Do you want me to cook you something? 250 00:13:11,158 --> 00:13:13,294 No, no, no. Biscuits are good. 251 00:13:13,327 --> 00:13:16,263 -Sugar, syrup, fat, and salt. -All the main nutrients. 252 00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:17,364 -[chuckles] -The thing is, I don't 253 00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:19,767 really know anyone at college, not properly, 254 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,602 because I'm always, you know, I'm always coming back up here 255 00:13:21,635 --> 00:13:23,470 if I'm not in tutorials or lectures. 256 00:13:23,503 --> 00:13:25,239 And then when I'm back with Maya and Jay, it just... 257 00:13:25,272 --> 00:13:27,107 it feels like I'm, you know, 258 00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:28,108 I'm interrupting their routine.... 259 00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,610 -Yeah. -...like I'm a hindrance 260 00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,612 and not a help and that they're just better off without me. 261 00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:33,280 It was always gonna be difficult, lovely, 262 00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:34,481 but you're managing. 263 00:13:34,514 --> 00:13:36,550 I'm not, Mum! I can't do it. 264 00:13:36,583 --> 00:13:38,218 There's no way of making this work. 265 00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:42,156 I want to defer and then rejoin the course again in... 266 00:13:42,189 --> 00:13:43,824 I don't know, two years. 267 00:13:43,857 --> 00:13:45,793 And between now and then, I can get a job in London, 268 00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:48,395 and I can be a proper boyfriend and a proper dad. 269 00:13:48,428 --> 00:13:50,397 Mate, you've already turned this course down once, Luke. 270 00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:52,499 They're not gonna let you muck 'em about again. 271 00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:54,235 It's worth asking, though, isn't it? 272 00:13:54,268 --> 00:13:56,270 I can't keep feeling like this. 273 00:13:56,303 --> 00:13:58,472 Even if you can defer, and you get a job with decent money, 274 00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:01,141 then there's no way that you're gonna leave that 275 00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,277 in two years and go back to college. 276 00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:04,511 Maybe that's good! 277 00:14:04,544 --> 00:14:07,248 No, it's not! Lukey, it's not good. 278 00:14:07,281 --> 00:14:10,384 This course will get you to amazing places. 279 00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:13,487 Not just making a good living, but loving what you do. 280 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,155 It's what people dream of, 281 00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,291 doing what other people do as a hobby, 282 00:14:17,324 --> 00:14:18,592 but getting paid for it. 283 00:14:20,427 --> 00:14:23,264 Hey, I can see how difficult this is, 284 00:14:23,297 --> 00:14:26,267 'cause you feel like you're losing a bond with Jay. 285 00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:27,601 -Exactly! -Yes, but if you can 286 00:14:27,634 --> 00:14:29,470 just ride out the next three years, 287 00:14:29,503 --> 00:14:31,138 then you're gonna have so many more options. 288 00:14:31,171 --> 00:14:32,606 -I can't stand it! -No, I know. 289 00:14:32,639 --> 00:14:34,241 I'm gonna ask them if I can defer, 290 00:14:34,274 --> 00:14:36,277 and if they won't let me do it, then I'll just quit. 291 00:14:36,310 --> 00:14:37,745 -No, no, no, Luke. -Hey, mate, 292 00:14:37,778 --> 00:14:39,747 you have to think very seriously about this. 293 00:14:39,780 --> 00:14:42,582 It's what I have to do, okay? I'm sorry. 294 00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:46,353 I'm gonna go to Maya's. I'm on the coach 295 00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:47,621 again in the morning. I'll call you. 296 00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:49,490 Don't do anything silly, Luke, okay? I'm... 297 00:14:49,523 --> 00:14:52,192 No, I'm fine. I'm fine. I just... I need to go. Okay? 298 00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:55,729 -Eat. -Yeah. Proper meal. 299 00:14:57,164 --> 00:14:58,565 Fucking hell. 300 00:14:58,598 --> 00:14:59,532 Poor sod. 301 00:15:01,134 --> 00:15:03,070 -[inhales deeply] Hon? -Yeah. 302 00:15:03,103 --> 00:15:05,472 Do you... I'm just... just playing devil's advocate here. 303 00:15:05,505 --> 00:15:07,508 Do you think it might be for the best if he leaves? 304 00:15:07,541 --> 00:15:10,778 Absolutely fucking not. We have to stop him quitting. 305 00:15:10,811 --> 00:15:13,147 Look, it's... it's a good course. I know that. 306 00:15:13,180 --> 00:15:15,482 But you know, you can't be this miserable for three years. 307 00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:17,751 But he's midway through his first fucking term. 308 00:15:17,784 --> 00:15:19,286 They'll work it out. They just will. 309 00:15:19,319 --> 00:15:21,522 And it's... it's not just a good course. 310 00:15:21,555 --> 00:15:24,825 It is outstanding. He'd be crazy to give it up. 311 00:15:24,858 --> 00:15:26,527 We're agreed on that, right? Sure. Yeah. 312 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:28,495 Do you mean, "sure, yeah," as in, "not really, no"? 313 00:15:28,528 --> 00:15:31,131 -We have to be realistic, hon. -Oh, right. Do we? 314 00:15:31,164 --> 00:15:33,767 Okay. Well, great. That's great. 315 00:15:35,269 --> 00:15:37,805 Oh. I'll take another biscuit. 316 00:15:37,838 --> 00:15:39,172 [exhales deeply] 317 00:15:42,643 --> 00:15:46,347 I am taking so much shit for just 318 00:15:46,380 --> 00:15:47,647 This will be so good for you. 319 00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:51,184 Biggest gig I've done. Might open a few doors. 320 00:15:51,752 --> 00:15:54,622 Yeah. You'll have your own salon in a couple of years, 321 00:15:54,655 --> 00:15:56,423 -middle of Mayfair. -[laughs] 322 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:59,493 400 pound for a cut, 500 for a color, 323 00:15:59,526 --> 00:16:02,396 -free cup of tea. -But 50 pounds for a biscuit. 324 00:16:02,429 --> 00:16:04,064 [laughs] Yeah. 325 00:16:04,565 --> 00:16:07,067 -I'll miss you. -I miss you, too. 326 00:16:09,102 --> 00:16:11,438 -[laughs] It'll fly by. -[chuckles] 327 00:16:14,308 --> 00:16:16,576 -I'll call you tomorrow. -Great. 328 00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:20,781 [engine starts] 329 00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:22,249 Bye. I love you. 330 00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:24,351 Bye. Drive safe! 331 00:16:33,427 --> 00:16:34,728 [doorbell rings] 332 00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:41,468 -Oh, hi, Jim. -Is Paul in, Ally? 333 00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:44,204 No, he's giving Luke a lift back up to Manchester. 334 00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:46,507 -Can I come in? -Sure. 335 00:16:46,540 --> 00:16:49,109 Paul's never really talked about his grandparents. 336 00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:52,345 Well, both his granddads died before he was born. 337 00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:54,615 That was the way it was back then, 338 00:16:54,648 --> 00:16:56,417 if you were from the class we were. 339 00:16:56,450 --> 00:16:58,652 The men dipped out in their 50s. 340 00:16:58,685 --> 00:17:01,355 Jackie's mum went in her mid 60s. 341 00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:04,258 -And your mum? -She had a few more years, 342 00:17:04,291 --> 00:17:06,493 but her dementia got pretty bad. 343 00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:10,297 I stopped taking Paul up to see her at the care home 344 00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:12,099 'cause it worried him. 345 00:17:12,132 --> 00:17:14,368 Sometimes she thought Paul was me 346 00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:18,205 and that I was her brother or that I was me dad 347 00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:20,040 or Jesus. 348 00:17:21,075 --> 00:17:24,311 Difficult for an eight-year-old to make sense of that. 349 00:17:25,245 --> 00:17:26,079 Thanks, pet. 350 00:17:27,581 --> 00:17:29,250 -But Jackie's not... -Oh, no, no. 351 00:17:29,283 --> 00:17:31,318 -No. -She's nowhere near that. 352 00:17:32,252 --> 00:17:33,320 But it's coming over the hill. 353 00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:36,089 I can sense it. 354 00:17:36,723 --> 00:17:39,093 She asked me the other day where we were. 355 00:17:39,126 --> 00:17:41,095 Now, that's different from forgetting names 356 00:17:41,128 --> 00:17:43,130 or where you've left your glasses. 357 00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:44,365 I'm so sorry, Jim. 358 00:17:44,398 --> 00:17:50,471 I don't want Paul to know because I might be wrong. 359 00:17:50,504 --> 00:17:54,241 Jackie might be as right as rain and just be a bit forgetful. 360 00:17:54,274 --> 00:17:56,477 She might not have dementia 361 00:17:56,510 --> 00:17:58,646 or "Old-Timer's Disease," as she calls it. 362 00:17:58,679 --> 00:18:00,714 [chuckles] 363 00:18:01,148 --> 00:18:03,049 But I wanted to tell you 364 00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:05,352 that I'm gonna step up, 365 00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:08,355 care for her, look after her, 366 00:18:08,388 --> 00:18:10,056 learn to cook 367 00:18:10,824 --> 00:18:13,226 and how to do a whites wash in the machine 368 00:18:13,894 --> 00:18:17,131 -and how duvet covers work. -[sighs] 369 00:18:17,164 --> 00:18:18,666 It'd be nice 370 00:18:18,699 --> 00:18:21,335 to make up for all the crap I put her through. 371 00:18:21,368 --> 00:18:24,338 Oh, you'll do great, Jim. You will. 372 00:18:24,371 --> 00:18:26,106 But if Paul asks me about Jackie, 373 00:18:26,139 --> 00:18:29,677 I can't not tell him 'cause we don't lie to each other. 374 00:18:29,710 --> 00:18:31,244 Fair enough. 375 00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:33,814 [inhales deeply] I just don't want him frettin'. 376 00:18:33,847 --> 00:18:35,048 [Ally] Mm. 377 00:18:35,682 --> 00:18:37,217 I understand. 378 00:18:37,718 --> 00:18:40,087 A long way for him to go to give Luke a lift. 379 00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:42,389 He wanted to save Luke from another coach journey 380 00:18:42,422 --> 00:18:45,125 and to try and talk some sense into him. 381 00:18:45,158 --> 00:18:49,096 Luke's determined to defer or quit his place, 382 00:18:49,129 --> 00:18:51,798 and Paul's under strict instructions to stop him. 383 00:18:52,199 --> 00:18:54,335 You know, for an anxious boy, Luke makes a big dent... 384 00:18:54,368 --> 00:18:55,736 -[door opens] -...on the world, doesn't he? 385 00:18:55,769 --> 00:18:57,238 I know. He does. He always has. 386 00:18:57,271 --> 00:18:58,438 [door closes] 387 00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:00,307 Hi, love. 388 00:19:00,674 --> 00:19:01,809 Hello, Ava. 389 00:19:01,842 --> 00:19:03,310 Hi, Grandad. 390 00:19:04,111 --> 00:19:05,379 Is everything all right? 391 00:19:05,412 --> 00:19:07,214 Fine. 392 00:19:07,247 --> 00:19:08,381 I'll skedaddle. 393 00:19:09,249 --> 00:19:10,517 Thanks for the tea. 394 00:19:11,718 --> 00:19:13,554 Jay was up a lot in the night last night, 395 00:19:13,587 --> 00:19:15,823 and when he did go to sleep, I couldn't. 396 00:19:15,856 --> 00:19:18,259 [scoffs] Yeah, that's impossible, isn't it? 397 00:19:18,292 --> 00:19:21,461 Like trying to meditate on a fucking ghost train. 398 00:19:25,299 --> 00:19:27,368 Still thinking of quitting your course? 399 00:19:27,401 --> 00:19:28,502 [inhales deeply] 400 00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:31,104 Yeah, I've been thinking you're right. [sighs] 401 00:19:32,272 --> 00:19:35,109 They're not gonna let me defer after everything that went on, 402 00:19:35,142 --> 00:19:37,244 and, you know... 403 00:19:37,845 --> 00:19:39,346 I think, yeah, I'm just gonna quit. 404 00:19:40,514 --> 00:19:42,383 You realize how big a deal this is? 405 00:19:42,416 --> 00:19:44,752 I know, but I can't keep this up. 406 00:19:44,785 --> 00:19:48,389 And I need to prioritize Maya and Jay, and I need to... 407 00:19:48,422 --> 00:19:51,091 [inhales deeply] I don't know. 408 00:19:51,124 --> 00:19:53,360 You need to get it right. I understand that. 409 00:19:53,393 --> 00:19:55,496 Because you're at the stage as a dad 410 00:19:55,529 --> 00:19:58,365 where you can still... get it right. 411 00:19:58,398 --> 00:20:00,834 But just promise me something, please. 412 00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:02,803 -What? -[sighs] 413 00:20:02,836 --> 00:20:05,239 Leave it another week before you quit. 414 00:20:05,272 --> 00:20:07,408 Just... just one week. I wanna see if I can... 415 00:20:07,441 --> 00:20:09,343 do some... [exhales deeply] 416 00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:10,644 Like what? 417 00:20:10,677 --> 00:20:13,681 Pull some strings. I don't know. One string. 418 00:20:13,714 --> 00:20:17,317 -Okay. -Good. [sniffs] 419 00:20:17,985 --> 00:20:20,254 [inhales deeply] I'm just gonna close my eyes for a bit. 420 00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:22,322 -Keep talking, though. -No, go for it. 421 00:20:23,857 --> 00:20:27,361 If I pop into a service station, do not wake up and start crying. 422 00:20:27,394 --> 00:20:28,762 [chuckles] 423 00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:32,266 [Ava] I said it ages ago, but Holly didn't hear me. 424 00:20:32,299 --> 00:20:34,335 And then... I don't know, 425 00:20:34,368 --> 00:20:35,636 we were just having a fun relationship, 426 00:20:35,669 --> 00:20:38,339 and it... it didn't seem to get said. 427 00:20:38,372 --> 00:20:40,207 And she definitely said it earlier? 428 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:42,076 Loud and clear. 429 00:20:42,109 --> 00:20:44,245 And I don't know why I couldn't say it back. 430 00:20:44,278 --> 00:20:45,712 Well, do you love her? 431 00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:48,315 I don't know. 432 00:20:48,849 --> 00:20:50,050 I think so. 433 00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:52,085 No, I do... 434 00:20:52,853 --> 00:20:53,753 I think. 435 00:20:54,855 --> 00:20:56,357 All this stuff is new. 436 00:20:56,390 --> 00:20:58,358 I know, love. It's difficult, isn't it? 437 00:20:59,526 --> 00:21:01,428 Does it get easier as you get older? 438 00:21:01,461 --> 00:21:03,530 No, not really. [laughs] 439 00:21:07,367 --> 00:21:10,471 [indistinct conversations] 440 00:21:10,504 --> 00:21:12,205 Thank you. I'll see you next time. 441 00:21:12,539 --> 00:21:14,074 -Oh. -Andrew. 442 00:21:14,107 --> 00:21:15,509 -Paul, how are you? -Thank you for meeting me. 443 00:21:15,542 --> 00:21:16,810 I really appreciate it. 444 00:21:16,843 --> 00:21:18,345 It's a pleasure. It's lovely to see you. 445 00:21:18,378 --> 00:21:20,281 Um... [chuckles] you know those bastards 446 00:21:20,314 --> 00:21:23,550 in politics, in the media, who use their school connections 447 00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:26,487 to get preferential treatment and sail through life? 448 00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:28,222 Those bastards. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 449 00:21:28,255 --> 00:21:31,659 Well, I need to briefly be one of those bastards. 450 00:21:31,692 --> 00:21:33,394 -[chuckles] -[chuckles] 'Cause, uh, Luke, 451 00:21:33,427 --> 00:21:35,763 my... my Luke, uh, wants to defer his place 452 00:21:35,796 --> 00:21:37,264 on the music production and sound engineering course... 453 00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:40,367 -Okay. -...for... for two years. 454 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:41,501 -Two years? -Mm. 455 00:21:42,569 --> 00:21:44,505 -Hmm. Okay. -Um, but look, he's... 456 00:21:44,538 --> 00:21:46,640 he's a new dad, his partner lives in London, 457 00:21:46,673 --> 00:21:49,109 and the whole back and forth thing is just... I... 458 00:21:49,142 --> 00:21:51,211 well, it... it's killing him, basically. 459 00:21:51,244 --> 00:21:52,379 And, uh, I just thought, you're... 460 00:21:52,412 --> 00:21:54,348 you're a really senior member of staff here, 461 00:21:54,381 --> 00:21:56,817 so maybe you could put a word in 462 00:21:56,850 --> 00:21:59,086 so he doesn't get chucked out on his ear. 463 00:21:59,119 --> 00:22:01,255 -You know what I mean? -Yeah. Okay. 464 00:22:01,288 --> 00:22:03,357 Um... [sighs] 465 00:22:03,390 --> 00:22:05,659 I mean, I'm gonna need some more details. 466 00:22:05,692 --> 00:22:07,361 -Mm-hmm. -See? 467 00:22:07,394 --> 00:22:11,231 Um... shall we... go to the pub? 468 00:22:11,264 --> 00:22:14,501 -We can chat it through. -Oh, mate, lovely. Thank you. 469 00:22:14,534 --> 00:22:16,337 -All right, yeah, yeah, yeah. -Thanks so much. Thank you. 470 00:22:16,370 --> 00:22:18,239 I'm driving, so I'll... I'll just have a half one. 471 00:22:18,272 --> 00:22:20,341 Yeah. I'm on warfarin for a heart thing, 472 00:22:20,374 --> 00:22:21,742 so I'll just be on the pretendy lager. 473 00:22:21,775 --> 00:22:23,744 [chuckles] Christ. Do you remember living it large? 474 00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:26,680 Oh, no, I only ever really lived it small to medium, I think. 475 00:22:26,713 --> 00:22:28,249 -[Paul laughs] -[Jackie] Mmm. 476 00:22:28,282 --> 00:22:30,084 Lovely bit of toast, Jim. 477 00:22:30,117 --> 00:22:33,520 -Oh, thanks. I'm quite the chef. -[laughs] 478 00:22:34,788 --> 00:22:38,359 Ah! No, it's not a tree or his long johns. 479 00:22:38,392 --> 00:22:41,095 -It's the dog's ear. Right. -Mm. 480 00:22:41,128 --> 00:22:42,396 I'm looking for more dog's ear pieces. 481 00:22:42,429 --> 00:22:44,598 Mm. I'll help you. 482 00:22:57,277 --> 00:22:58,712 Right. What have we got here? 483 00:23:00,113 --> 00:23:02,349 Ha ha! Yes! 484 00:23:02,382 --> 00:23:04,218 -What's that? -The dog's bum, I think. 485 00:23:04,251 --> 00:23:06,353 [laughs] Try it.