1 00:00:20,461 --> 00:00:25,981 (upbeat music) 2 00:00:30,821 --> 00:00:32,021 - Cheers, mate. 3 00:00:35,221 --> 00:00:36,381 (car horn honks) 4 00:00:42,701 --> 00:00:44,101 Hello, how are you doing? 5 00:00:44,181 --> 00:00:46,061 - I'm good, how are you? - I'm good, yeah. 6 00:00:48,741 --> 00:00:50,741 I need to get this inside. 7 00:00:54,981 --> 00:00:56,581 - [George] Hi, everyone. 8 00:00:56,661 --> 00:00:59,541 We gonna rehearse at the top of the show in 20 minutes. 9 00:00:59,621 --> 00:01:01,541 Please let Danny and Deepak know. 10 00:01:01,621 --> 00:01:04,301 That's 20 minutes in TV one. 11 00:01:04,381 --> 00:01:05,901 - (sighs) - Thanks very much. 12 00:01:33,821 --> 00:01:36,101 - What the fuck! 13 00:01:36,181 --> 00:01:38,141 Oi! Rioja? 14 00:01:38,221 --> 00:01:40,861 - Do I look like Antonio Banderas? - Danny! 15 00:01:40,941 --> 00:01:44,701 - Give me a couple more, and get me something Argentinian. 16 00:01:44,781 --> 00:01:46,901 Don't look at her, she's not Mom. 17 00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:50,861 Cheryl won't let me see my boy again, I know it. 18 00:01:50,941 --> 00:01:53,901 One thing, keep her and the boy out of the press. 19 00:01:53,981 --> 00:01:54,981 I promised her! 20 00:01:55,061 --> 00:01:56,501 - We can fix this. 21 00:01:56,581 --> 00:01:57,821 - Fix it? Fix it? 22 00:01:57,901 --> 00:01:59,461 It's happened, Robyn. 23 00:01:59,541 --> 00:02:01,581 These papers are being printed. 24 00:02:01,661 --> 00:02:03,821 Semi-retired codgers are gonna be driving them 25 00:02:03,901 --> 00:02:06,021 up and down the country in their Renault KANGOOs 26 00:02:06,101 --> 00:02:07,821 so the nation can enjoy my fucking breakdown 27 00:02:07,901 --> 00:02:10,061 with a Sunday morning crumpets. 28 00:02:10,141 --> 00:02:11,061 It exists. 29 00:02:11,141 --> 00:02:12,461 It's solid. 30 00:02:12,541 --> 00:02:14,141 It's matter. 31 00:02:15,141 --> 00:02:16,901 - Hey, Danny! 32 00:02:16,981 --> 00:02:18,581 Take it easy. 33 00:02:18,661 --> 00:02:19,861 - I need a line. 34 00:02:19,941 --> 00:02:21,501 - Danny! 35 00:02:21,581 --> 00:02:23,181 Danny! Hey, you can't do that here. 36 00:02:23,301 --> 00:02:24,381 What if someone sees you? 37 00:02:24,461 --> 00:02:25,781 - What, what? What are they gonna do? 38 00:02:25,861 --> 00:02:27,141 Go to the papers? (laughs) 39 00:02:27,181 --> 00:02:28,461 Hey, come on! 40 00:02:28,541 --> 00:02:30,301 Bring it on, on you dumb bastards! 41 00:02:30,381 --> 00:02:32,741 - Get a load of this. - Get down! 42 00:02:35,301 --> 00:02:37,981 - Sit. - (panting) 43 00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:42,741 - I fucked it. 44 00:02:42,821 --> 00:02:44,061 I fucked it. 45 00:02:44,141 --> 00:02:46,901 - Okay, Danny... 46 00:02:47,021 --> 00:02:48,861 I know that it may feel like 47 00:02:48,901 --> 00:02:52,901 the house is falling down right now, but... 48 00:02:52,981 --> 00:02:56,021 sometimes we need that so that we can rebuild 49 00:02:56,101 --> 00:02:57,901 on the foundations. 50 00:02:57,981 --> 00:03:00,541 (deep breaths) 51 00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:05,501 - It was him. - What? 52 00:03:07,221 --> 00:03:08,701 - Deepak did this. 53 00:03:08,781 --> 00:03:09,901 - What do you mean? 54 00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:11,461 - He's the only one that knew. 55 00:03:11,541 --> 00:03:15,221 The little cock-nosed wombat. 56 00:03:15,301 --> 00:03:17,861 Yeah, he's making a play. 57 00:03:17,941 --> 00:03:19,581 He's jealous. 58 00:03:19,661 --> 00:03:20,701 Yeah, he's jealous. 59 00:03:20,781 --> 00:03:22,381 He's jealous of me 60 00:03:22,461 --> 00:03:23,941 because everyone likes me 61 00:03:24,021 --> 00:03:25,901 because I've got the charm. 62 00:03:25,981 --> 00:03:28,101 Yeah, yeah. What he doesn't realize-- 63 00:03:28,181 --> 00:03:31,141 He thinks he's Billy big balls, 64 00:03:31,221 --> 00:03:33,861 but what he doesn't know is that nobody likes Ernie Weiss. 65 00:03:33,941 --> 00:03:35,461 You take the funny man away 66 00:03:35,541 --> 00:03:38,541 and you're just left with a boring wally. 67 00:03:38,621 --> 00:03:41,181 Yeah, you can't have Kenan without Kel. 68 00:03:41,261 --> 00:03:42,621 You can't have Cannon without Ball. 69 00:03:42,701 --> 00:03:44,861 You can't have one Ronnie. 70 00:03:44,941 --> 00:03:46,261 - Calm down. 71 00:03:46,341 --> 00:03:49,021 Yeah, nobody wants the Olsen sister, 72 00:03:49,101 --> 00:03:51,181 they want the Olsen twins. 73 00:03:51,261 --> 00:03:52,861 Yeah, except for Elizabeth Olsen 74 00:03:52,941 --> 00:03:53,981 but that's a different thing. 75 00:03:54,061 --> 00:03:55,741 He'll never be Elizabeth Olsen. 76 00:03:55,821 --> 00:03:58,301 - I'm gonna kill him, the prick. - No, Danny! 77 00:03:58,381 --> 00:04:00,501 - Hey! - Get off. 78 00:04:00,581 --> 00:04:01,861 - Get inside. 79 00:04:01,941 --> 00:04:03,821 - No! - Calm down. 80 00:04:03,901 --> 00:04:05,621 Why are you so strong? 81 00:04:05,701 --> 00:04:07,541 (cries out) 82 00:04:11,621 --> 00:04:13,941 Saggy baggy bullet bags! 83 00:04:15,581 --> 00:04:18,461 Help me! 84 00:04:18,541 --> 00:04:19,621 (cackling) 85 00:04:25,261 --> 00:04:26,661 (whimpering) 86 00:04:26,741 --> 00:04:28,861 - Oh, shut up! - (mumbles) 87 00:04:30,701 --> 00:04:32,341 - What are you doing? What's that? 88 00:04:32,381 --> 00:04:36,941 - You're gonna calm down and let me handle this. 89 00:04:37,021 --> 00:04:38,341 Don't fucking move. 90 00:04:40,221 --> 00:04:41,581 - Sounded like it went well. 91 00:04:41,661 --> 00:04:43,141 - You, stay here. 92 00:04:43,221 --> 00:04:45,221 Don't let him leave. Where's Deepak? 93 00:04:45,261 --> 00:04:47,381 - He's got this pious "I told you so" thing going on. 94 00:04:47,501 --> 00:04:49,381 I think part of him is relieved that the world's finally gets 95 00:04:49,461 --> 00:04:51,261 to see the darling he needs to work with, 96 00:04:51,381 --> 00:04:52,701 which I get because it's a fucking nightmare 97 00:04:52,781 --> 00:04:53,741 being partners with an addict. 98 00:04:53,821 --> 00:04:55,541 Sorry, I didn't mean you. 99 00:04:55,621 --> 00:04:56,741 - Don't tell me you don't have a choice to run it. 100 00:04:56,821 --> 00:04:58,381 - I take it Caroline's here. 101 00:04:58,501 --> 00:05:00,501 - I thought she was setting up mission control downstairs. 102 00:05:00,581 --> 00:05:02,101 - Fine! Then I won't have a choice 103 00:05:02,181 --> 00:05:04,181 when I nail your ears to the front of a dirt bike 104 00:05:04,261 --> 00:05:06,901 and ride you face-first through a field of un-detonated shit mines. 105 00:05:06,941 --> 00:05:10,381 - Fuck! - What's the temperature? 106 00:05:10,461 --> 00:05:12,781 - Catastrophic climate change. 107 00:05:12,821 --> 00:05:16,021 She's raging at Reese for pulling this shit. 108 00:05:16,101 --> 00:05:18,461 - You haven't heard anything from her, have you? 109 00:05:18,541 --> 00:05:19,621 - Reese? 110 00:05:19,701 --> 00:05:21,501 No. Why would I? 111 00:05:23,781 --> 00:05:25,821 - Have you got that deceitful monster on the phone yet? 112 00:05:25,901 --> 00:05:27,261 - She's not picking up. 113 00:05:27,341 --> 00:05:28,621 - I'm going to break into a sperm bank 114 00:05:28,701 --> 00:05:30,341 and forcibly impregnate her with a fire hose 115 00:05:30,381 --> 00:05:32,461 just so I can murder her children. 116 00:05:33,821 --> 00:05:35,141 (clatters) 117 00:05:35,221 --> 00:05:36,621 We had a deal! 118 00:05:36,701 --> 00:05:38,741 I want to know who her source is 119 00:05:38,821 --> 00:05:41,581 and how in the name of Dame Maggie Smith's bleached asshole, 120 00:05:41,661 --> 00:05:42,821 we did not know about it. 121 00:05:42,901 --> 00:05:44,941 - Danny's status? - Not great. 122 00:05:45,021 --> 00:05:47,741 - He's flying over the cuckoos nest. - I'm not surprised. 123 00:05:47,821 --> 00:05:49,701 Within 24 hours, the nation's going to be reading 124 00:05:49,781 --> 00:05:51,861 about the adventures of Danny Davis and his "Wee Willy Winkie" 125 00:05:51,941 --> 00:05:53,981 whilst taking their Sabbath morning dumps. 126 00:05:54,061 --> 00:05:56,421 - So, what's the plan? - Well, I spoke with the channel controller, 127 00:05:56,501 --> 00:05:58,981 and they have pulled him from the show. 128 00:05:59,061 --> 00:06:01,581 - Really? - They can't take a risk of him having a meltdown on air. 129 00:06:01,661 --> 00:06:03,701 And I think Danny, he is on his ninth life. 130 00:06:03,781 --> 00:06:05,741 - What about Deepak? 131 00:06:05,821 --> 00:06:08,461 - Deepak... 132 00:06:08,541 --> 00:06:10,381 will be presenting with Ashley Dylan. 133 00:06:10,461 --> 00:06:13,381 - The warmup girl? - Yes, it's all sort of a reduction. 134 00:06:13,461 --> 00:06:16,021 She's green, but she's got charm. 135 00:06:16,101 --> 00:06:17,661 Either way, her profile will rocket after this 136 00:06:17,741 --> 00:06:19,101 so we need her locked in. 137 00:06:19,181 --> 00:06:20,821 Bell, Bell, Bell, go pick this... 138 00:06:21,941 --> 00:06:23,221 Also, I want you to write Deepak 139 00:06:23,301 --> 00:06:25,101 a heartfelt statement for the top of the show. 140 00:06:25,181 --> 00:06:28,941 Ride the, um, male mental health angle hard. 141 00:06:29,021 --> 00:06:30,541 Eve, he's yours. 142 00:06:30,621 --> 00:06:32,781 - I was just heading over there to check on him now. 143 00:06:32,861 --> 00:06:34,541 - Oh, are you waiting for your Uber? 144 00:06:34,621 --> 00:06:37,141 - Go! - Jenny from Sky News is on hold. 145 00:06:37,221 --> 00:06:40,901 - Warm and genial or Jenny with the gay husband? - Gay husband. 146 00:06:40,981 --> 00:06:44,301 - I want you to talk to Reese. - She wouldn't listen to me. 147 00:06:44,381 --> 00:06:46,781 - Make her. Hi, Jenny. - (phone rings) 148 00:06:46,861 --> 00:06:49,981 Thanks calling back. How's things with Fabian? 149 00:06:52,301 --> 00:06:53,741 Ouch! 150 00:06:53,821 --> 00:06:55,101 Mm-hmm. 151 00:06:55,181 --> 00:06:58,381 - You can not call me, say. 152 00:06:58,461 --> 00:07:00,221 - You need to tell Caroline to back off. 153 00:07:00,301 --> 00:07:02,621 She keeps leaving these angry voicemails. 154 00:07:02,701 --> 00:07:05,141 She makes Alec Baldwin sound like a Buddhist monk. 155 00:07:05,221 --> 00:07:07,461 - You haven't told her when I stayed over at yours, have you? 156 00:07:07,541 --> 00:07:09,541 - Well, I did post this cute picture of you asleep, 157 00:07:09,621 --> 00:07:12,421 but I only posted it to close friends. 158 00:07:12,501 --> 00:07:14,461 - I'm serious. If this comes back to me-- - Chill the hell out, Robyn. 159 00:07:14,541 --> 00:07:16,501 - I'm a journalist. We have anonymous sources. 160 00:07:16,581 --> 00:07:18,741 - Why are you calling me? - I want an exclusive with Danny. 161 00:07:18,821 --> 00:07:20,981 - What! Caroline is never gonna go for that. 162 00:07:21,061 --> 00:07:22,661 You just stabbed her in the back, 163 00:07:22,741 --> 00:07:25,341 and now you want us to give you an exclusive? 164 00:07:25,421 --> 00:07:27,701 - No, you just stabbed her in the back. 165 00:07:30,621 --> 00:07:32,221 I'm sure you'll figure it out. 166 00:07:52,461 --> 00:07:55,541 - Robyn! I've been looking for you everywhere. 167 00:07:55,621 --> 00:07:58,701 - Everything all right? - Yeah. I, um... 168 00:07:58,781 --> 00:08:01,981 I need you to draft a speech for Deepak for the beginning of the show. 169 00:08:02,061 --> 00:08:03,941 - Me? - Yeah, just the draft. I'll prep and proof. 170 00:08:04,021 --> 00:08:05,461 But there's stuff I needed to do. 171 00:08:05,541 --> 00:08:06,981 It needs to say that with great regret 172 00:08:07,061 --> 00:08:08,741 that Danny will not be appearing on tonight's show, 173 00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:10,501 and then over the next few days, 174 00:08:10,581 --> 00:08:12,941 there will be some revelations on the press, 175 00:08:13,021 --> 00:08:14,501 that he's seeking treatment because he doesn't want his personal issues 176 00:08:14,581 --> 00:08:15,981 to get in the way of your entertainment, 177 00:08:16,061 --> 00:08:17,421 insert joke here, blah, blah, blah, 178 00:08:17,501 --> 00:08:19,661 something about forgiveness, love, 179 00:08:19,741 --> 00:08:21,661 friendship, poor Danny, poor Deepak, 180 00:08:21,741 --> 00:08:23,861 big finish, standing ovation, got it? 181 00:08:23,941 --> 00:08:27,461 - No, not really. - And I need you to get Ashley Dylan to assign this. 182 00:08:27,541 --> 00:08:29,261 - Ashley Dylan, the comedian? - Yeah, she's co-presenting 183 00:08:29,341 --> 00:08:30,701 and Caroline wants her on the books. 184 00:08:30,781 --> 00:08:32,901 - Counting on you. - (phone rings) 185 00:08:32,981 --> 00:08:34,261 I have to take this. 186 00:08:35,621 --> 00:08:37,141 Ruth! 187 00:08:37,221 --> 00:08:39,301 Oh my God, thank you so much for calling me back. 188 00:08:39,381 --> 00:08:40,741 - Rob, it's me. 189 00:08:42,461 --> 00:08:44,941 - Mark! 190 00:08:45,021 --> 00:08:46,741 Can you put Ruth on the phone, please? 191 00:08:46,821 --> 00:08:48,501 - I'm afraid she doesn't want to talk to you, Rob. 192 00:08:48,541 --> 00:08:50,301 I'm just ringing to say, 193 00:08:50,381 --> 00:08:53,021 I'll drop your stuff off at your office on Monday. 194 00:08:53,101 --> 00:08:54,901 - Mark, put Ruth on the phone. 195 00:08:54,981 --> 00:08:56,661 - She's not gonna speak to you, I'm sorry. 196 00:08:56,781 --> 00:09:00,141 - Oh, what? So, she's forgiving you, then? 197 00:09:00,221 --> 00:09:02,621 She can let you back in, but she can't forgive her own sister? 198 00:09:02,661 --> 00:09:04,221 - Because you've made one mistake 199 00:09:04,301 --> 00:09:06,901 and you've spent the last three months regretting it. 200 00:09:06,981 --> 00:09:09,021 - I think because, I made a mistake 201 00:09:09,101 --> 00:09:10,461 and I've spent every moment since that mistake 202 00:09:10,541 --> 00:09:12,461 trying to make up for it. 203 00:09:12,541 --> 00:09:14,541 - Whilst she just makes a mistake and then another mistake, 204 00:09:14,621 --> 00:09:17,021 and they just get bigger and bigger and bigger. 205 00:09:17,101 --> 00:09:19,661 - And unfortunately when you make a mistake, 206 00:09:19,741 --> 00:09:21,661 you tend to follow it up with another 207 00:09:21,741 --> 00:09:24,141 and another and another and it just keeps going on and on. 208 00:09:24,221 --> 00:09:26,101 - And then when you do finally forgive her, 209 00:09:26,181 --> 00:09:27,861 she just reoffends. 210 00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,381 - Look, I think essentially what I'm trying to say 211 00:09:30,461 --> 00:09:32,661 is that forgiveness doesn't seem to help you. 212 00:09:32,741 --> 00:09:34,741 It just lets you go on and on. 213 00:09:34,781 --> 00:09:36,621 - Okay, I know I fucked up. 214 00:09:38,781 --> 00:09:40,101 I have a problem. 215 00:09:40,181 --> 00:09:41,901 - You do, and you have my sympathy, 216 00:09:42,021 --> 00:09:44,261 but you have got to fix it, 217 00:09:44,341 --> 00:09:45,901 because it is hurting people. 218 00:09:45,981 --> 00:09:48,541 - It's hurting Ruth... - Hey, do not, don't. 219 00:09:52,781 --> 00:09:55,861 But there's a bigger picture, Rob, here that we have to consider. 220 00:09:55,901 --> 00:09:59,981 We cannot allow volatility into our children's lives. 221 00:10:00,061 --> 00:10:02,781 It'll screw them up. 222 00:10:02,861 --> 00:10:05,381 You know that more than anyone. 223 00:10:09,181 --> 00:10:10,781 - Ruth, please, 224 00:10:10,861 --> 00:10:12,781 please can you hear me? 225 00:10:12,901 --> 00:10:15,501 Ruth, honey, please, just speak to me. 226 00:10:15,541 --> 00:10:18,781 - Your sister, loves you more than you can imagine... 227 00:10:18,901 --> 00:10:20,541 more than she'll ever love me, 228 00:10:20,661 --> 00:10:23,621 but she can't have you in her life, not like this. 229 00:10:26,541 --> 00:10:29,541 - Ruth, please. (sobs) 230 00:10:29,661 --> 00:10:31,981 - It's gonna break her heart, Rob. 231 00:10:32,061 --> 00:10:34,541 This is on you, it's not on her. 232 00:10:34,621 --> 00:10:37,221 And I'm begging you, if you do love her, 233 00:10:37,301 --> 00:10:39,741 you will not contact her unless she could guarantee 234 00:10:39,781 --> 00:10:41,301 that you won't let her down again. 235 00:10:46,341 --> 00:10:48,661 I'm rooting for you, Robyn. 236 00:10:48,741 --> 00:10:49,781 I really am. 237 00:10:52,021 --> 00:10:54,501 - (sobs) - (beeps) 238 00:11:25,621 --> 00:11:28,461 - (knocks) - Come in. 239 00:11:28,541 --> 00:11:29,421 - Hi, ya! 240 00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:31,221 I'm Melody. 241 00:11:31,301 --> 00:11:34,381 I hear that you are co-presenting today. 242 00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:36,741 - (sighs) Jesus! I haven't presented a full show before. 243 00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,741 I'm absolutely dropping me donuts here. 244 00:11:38,821 --> 00:11:42,181 I've been shaking like a cat, crapping an avocado stone. 245 00:11:42,261 --> 00:11:43,581 So what do you do, Melody? 246 00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:45,621 - Well, I am actually part of MPPR. 247 00:11:45,701 --> 00:11:47,261 We represent Danny and Deepak. 248 00:11:47,341 --> 00:11:49,421 - What are you doing here talking to me? 249 00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:52,181 Shouldn't you be manning the lifeboats? 250 00:11:52,261 --> 00:11:53,621 - No, actually, I was just wondering 251 00:11:53,701 --> 00:11:56,301 if you had anyone looking after your PR. 252 00:11:56,381 --> 00:11:58,381 - Me? I had to get the boss here, Melody. 253 00:11:58,461 --> 00:12:00,741 I can only afford single ply toilet paper. 254 00:12:00,821 --> 00:12:03,021 I do not have anyone looking after my PR. 255 00:12:03,101 --> 00:12:04,341 - Well, I think maybe, 256 00:12:04,421 --> 00:12:06,501 in light of everything, you might wanna 257 00:12:06,581 --> 00:12:09,421 think about having someone to look after your interests. 258 00:12:09,501 --> 00:12:11,621 - And is that what you want to do, Melody, 259 00:12:11,701 --> 00:12:13,141 look after my interests? 260 00:12:14,381 --> 00:12:15,741 I... 261 00:12:26,221 --> 00:12:28,061 Okay, um... 262 00:12:28,141 --> 00:12:30,741 I saw you performing at the Edinburgh Festival, 263 00:12:30,821 --> 00:12:32,221 it was in a wine bar, 264 00:12:32,301 --> 00:12:35,101 like six people on the Free Fringe, 265 00:12:35,181 --> 00:12:38,461 and you made me laugh so hard that I farted 266 00:12:38,541 --> 00:12:41,101 and I had to tell the guy that I was on a date with that 267 00:12:41,181 --> 00:12:42,941 it was just a squeaky chair. 268 00:12:43,021 --> 00:12:45,021 - I'm very sorry about that. (chuckles) 269 00:12:45,101 --> 00:12:46,581 - You've got more fun in your bones 270 00:12:46,661 --> 00:12:48,101 than both of those clowns out there. 271 00:12:48,181 --> 00:12:50,461 This is a real opportunity for you. 272 00:12:50,541 --> 00:12:52,221 We both know these stupid straight white guys 273 00:12:52,301 --> 00:12:53,581 are just gonna fuck fondle 274 00:12:53,661 --> 00:12:55,621 full power their way out of a job. 275 00:12:55,701 --> 00:12:57,821 And when they do, which they will, 276 00:12:57,901 --> 00:13:01,941 we need people like you in the wings waiting to capitalize. 277 00:13:02,021 --> 00:13:04,141 We can make sure that you're at the front of the queue. 278 00:13:05,581 --> 00:13:07,181 - What do you cost? 279 00:13:07,261 --> 00:13:08,741 - First three months we work for free 280 00:13:08,821 --> 00:13:10,101 and then once we've tripled your earnings, 281 00:13:10,181 --> 00:13:11,661 we'll talk about fees. 282 00:13:11,741 --> 00:13:13,701 - Ooh, I like your confidence. 283 00:13:13,781 --> 00:13:16,221 I've got to say, Melody, that was one hell of a speech. 284 00:13:16,301 --> 00:13:18,621 I feel like I'm in Wolf of Wall Street. 285 00:13:18,701 --> 00:13:21,221 I wanna go out and punch a door for something. 286 00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:22,861 - Excellent! 287 00:13:22,941 --> 00:13:27,181 Right, I'm gonna leave you to prepare. 288 00:13:27,261 --> 00:13:29,941 Hopefully we'll be working together again very soon. 289 00:13:30,021 --> 00:13:31,461 - Yeah. I certainly hope so. 290 00:13:34,421 --> 00:13:35,461 Here! 291 00:13:37,221 --> 00:13:38,141 What happened to your nose? 292 00:13:38,221 --> 00:13:40,341 - Ooh, it's just a spot. 293 00:13:40,421 --> 00:13:42,901 (chuckles) 294 00:13:45,581 --> 00:13:48,341 Do you know what? Actually, no, it's not. It's not just a spot. 295 00:13:48,421 --> 00:13:52,741 I got my nose pierced a week ago and I panicked, 296 00:13:52,821 --> 00:13:56,181 so I've just been wearing this plaster on it ever since. 297 00:13:56,261 --> 00:13:58,581 - Show. Come on, Melody, 298 00:13:58,661 --> 00:13:59,821 you're gonna have to rip off the Band-Aid 299 00:13:59,901 --> 00:14:01,861 both literally and figuratively. 300 00:14:08,741 --> 00:14:09,821 I love it. 301 00:14:09,901 --> 00:14:11,621 - Really? - I do. 302 00:14:11,701 --> 00:14:14,501 Stop walking around like you've been punched in the nose, 303 00:14:14,581 --> 00:14:16,821 and wear it with pride. 304 00:14:16,901 --> 00:14:19,021 You are cool. 305 00:14:19,101 --> 00:14:20,701 You are hard, 306 00:14:20,781 --> 00:14:22,101 you will a Baked Alaska. 307 00:14:26,421 --> 00:14:28,341 - Okay, thanks. 308 00:14:32,061 --> 00:14:33,061 Break a leg. 309 00:14:35,221 --> 00:14:37,501 - (chuckles) - (rock music) 310 00:14:51,741 --> 00:14:54,701 - Eve, relax. This is Danny's mental health we're talking about. 311 00:14:54,781 --> 00:14:56,901 Look, all I want is for my friend to get better. 312 00:14:56,981 --> 00:14:58,301 It's all the masters, right? 313 00:14:59,821 --> 00:15:01,421 - Where's the teabag? - Took it out. 314 00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:04,221 - You took it out? Why would you take it out? 315 00:15:04,301 --> 00:15:06,461 Get the fuck out of here! No, no no! Leave the tea! 316 00:15:06,541 --> 00:15:08,701 - I want tea! - Okay. 317 00:15:08,781 --> 00:15:10,821 Have you heard from the channel head yet? Does it affect our contracts? 318 00:15:10,901 --> 00:15:13,141 'Cause the contract refers to us both 319 00:15:13,221 --> 00:15:14,821 and I'd like to know if one of us breaches, does it void it for the pair. 320 00:15:14,901 --> 00:15:17,501 - There you are. Where the hell is everyone? 321 00:15:17,581 --> 00:15:19,981 Okay, so, I need to start talking through the set pieces. 322 00:15:20,061 --> 00:15:21,941 - Yeah, I've just signed up 323 00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:23,741 to a fixed-rate, five-year mortgage, digging into my basement, 324 00:15:23,821 --> 00:15:25,341 - got a resistance pool. - How nice. 325 00:15:25,421 --> 00:15:27,221 We just had a three and a half year legal battle 326 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:29,581 with the drummer from Def Leppard to get that pool 327 00:15:29,661 --> 00:15:31,421 I had let them build a driving range. 328 00:15:31,501 --> 00:15:33,301 He's got one arm, how does he even hold a golf club. 329 00:15:33,381 --> 00:15:35,301 - Darling, I really need you to focus. 330 00:15:35,381 --> 00:15:37,701 Danny's not going to be doing the show. 331 00:15:37,781 --> 00:15:39,621 - Excuse me? - Yeah, excuse me? 332 00:15:39,701 --> 00:15:41,141 - The whole bloody time, I've been saying Deepak 333 00:15:41,221 --> 00:15:42,741 should be doing this on his own for enough time. 334 00:15:42,821 --> 00:15:44,461 Haven't I been saying that, Deepak? 335 00:15:44,541 --> 00:15:46,181 - He's not doing the show? - He's a liability. 336 00:15:46,261 --> 00:15:48,021 He just relies on Deepak to do all the hard work, 337 00:15:48,101 --> 00:15:50,061 - while he's off at the club hanging out with strippers 338 00:15:50,141 --> 00:15:52,581 and getting women to blow cocaine up his ass with a straw. 339 00:15:52,661 --> 00:15:54,861 - (clears throat) - What? You told me 340 00:15:54,941 --> 00:15:56,861 he got a girl to blow cocaine up his ass with a straw. 341 00:15:56,941 --> 00:15:58,581 - And I told you that in confidence. 342 00:15:58,661 --> 00:16:00,861 Can we just rewind a second? 343 00:16:00,941 --> 00:16:03,381 Danny's not doing the show, at all? 344 00:16:03,461 --> 00:16:05,741 - No. Ashley Dylan's gonna do it. 345 00:16:05,821 --> 00:16:07,181 - What! - Ashley Dylan? 346 00:16:07,261 --> 00:16:08,861 - Is she even funny? - Oh, she is great. 347 00:16:08,941 --> 00:16:11,981 - Have you not seen her? - Oh wait, no, no, no, no, wait! 348 00:16:12,061 --> 00:16:14,941 Mine and Danny's energy is a very much boy-on-boy chemistry. 349 00:16:15,021 --> 00:16:18,021 We have a very laddy, cheeky, chappy boys, next door thing going on. 350 00:16:18,101 --> 00:16:20,861 - Girls can live next door. - Girls aren't funny. 351 00:16:20,941 --> 00:16:22,901 - Huh? - Sorry, I don't... 352 00:16:22,981 --> 00:16:25,381 Don't tweet that. I didn't mean. 353 00:16:25,461 --> 00:16:28,461 What I meant was, on the whole, 354 00:16:28,541 --> 00:16:31,501 the general public doesn't find girls funny. 355 00:16:31,581 --> 00:16:33,581 That's what I meant. 356 00:16:33,661 --> 00:16:36,021 - Sure. That's much better. 357 00:16:36,101 --> 00:16:39,221 Look, Ashley's great. We have a script. 358 00:16:39,301 --> 00:16:41,661 You just need to make sure you get through the show without any major meltdown. 359 00:16:41,741 --> 00:16:45,141 (rustles) 360 00:16:50,021 --> 00:16:52,941 - I'm sorry, dear. Who actually are you again? 361 00:16:53,021 --> 00:16:54,861 'Cause I'm George, I'm the director, I'm running the show, 362 00:16:54,941 --> 00:16:56,701 and this is the first I'm hearing about it. 363 00:16:56,781 --> 00:16:58,621 So maybe you could tell me who's making these decisions. 364 00:16:58,701 --> 00:17:00,741 - I'm Eve. We look after Danny and Deepak's PR. 365 00:17:00,821 --> 00:17:02,581 - PR? - Right. 366 00:17:02,661 --> 00:17:04,861 So we're employed by them and the network, 367 00:17:04,941 --> 00:17:07,741 so that's essentially, yes, your boss' boss' boss, 368 00:17:07,821 --> 00:17:10,701 to make sure that they remain the unstoppable moneymaking presenting duo 369 00:17:10,781 --> 00:17:13,621 that bring in 75% of this channel's advertising revenue. 370 00:17:13,701 --> 00:17:16,101 Oh, and keep shit-kickers like you in a job. 371 00:17:16,181 --> 00:17:17,221 Yeah. 372 00:17:26,581 --> 00:17:28,101 - I'm not sure about this. 373 00:17:28,221 --> 00:17:30,181 - Danny is in no fit state to present a TV show. 374 00:17:30,261 --> 00:17:31,821 - I've seen him present four hours of children's television 375 00:17:31,941 --> 00:17:33,701 on a gram and half of ketamine, the man's a machine. 376 00:17:33,781 --> 00:17:36,661 - Why can't he just do the show on his own, huh? 377 00:17:36,741 --> 00:17:39,021 - Anyone's hot? - Eve, have you seen Melody? 378 00:17:39,101 --> 00:17:40,581 I haven't seen her since earlier. 379 00:17:40,701 --> 00:17:42,421 What happened to your face? Did a pollen bomb go off? 380 00:17:42,501 --> 00:17:44,181 - Where is Danny, have you seen him? 381 00:17:44,261 --> 00:17:47,301 - Yeah, he's in his room. He's feeling a little stressed. 382 00:17:47,341 --> 00:17:50,501 - He's stressed? Of course he is. 383 00:17:50,581 --> 00:17:52,341 Classic Danny fucking Davis. 384 00:17:52,421 --> 00:17:54,341 He's stressed 'cause I've got to go out there 385 00:17:54,461 --> 00:17:57,421 and present a show live to nine million people without him. 386 00:17:57,501 --> 00:17:58,501 Excuse me, excuse me. 387 00:18:00,061 --> 00:18:02,541 - (vomits) - (sighs) 388 00:18:02,581 --> 00:18:04,941 - He fine. He always does this. 389 00:18:05,021 --> 00:18:07,501 It's good luck. 390 00:18:07,581 --> 00:18:09,581 - Could we get a runner in there, please? 391 00:18:09,701 --> 00:18:14,301 It needs sorting out, 'cause I threw up in the sink. 392 00:18:14,341 --> 00:18:15,981 I don't know why I threw up in the sink, 393 00:18:16,061 --> 00:18:17,341 'cause there's a toilet right next to it. 394 00:18:17,421 --> 00:18:19,341 - Okay, Deepak, dude, you gotta 395 00:18:19,461 --> 00:18:20,781 - get your shit together. - Yeah. 396 00:18:20,821 --> 00:18:22,781 - You got this, okay? - Okay. 397 00:18:22,821 --> 00:18:24,741 - We'll sort the sink Deepak, okay? 398 00:18:24,821 --> 00:18:27,541 Just, have yourself a little sit down. 399 00:18:27,581 --> 00:18:29,021 Get yourself together. 400 00:18:29,101 --> 00:18:31,061 - Hey look, if he does do the show on his own, 401 00:18:31,101 --> 00:18:32,941 does that mean he gets paid more? 402 00:18:38,421 --> 00:18:39,741 - Can I steal a cigarettes? 403 00:18:41,261 --> 00:18:42,461 - Back on the hot stuff, eh? 404 00:18:42,541 --> 00:18:43,941 - Is Deepak gonna be okay? 405 00:18:44,021 --> 00:18:45,261 - (sighs) He's gonna have to be. 406 00:18:45,341 --> 00:18:47,181 (slight laughs) 407 00:18:47,261 --> 00:18:50,101 So, turns out you were right. 408 00:18:50,221 --> 00:18:53,181 Gabriel is as much of a pro tool as all the others. 409 00:18:53,261 --> 00:18:54,341 - I know, right? 410 00:18:54,421 --> 00:18:55,941 - Handsome sexy billionaire 411 00:18:56,021 --> 00:18:58,901 turns out to actually be a massive dick. 412 00:18:58,981 --> 00:19:01,541 - I don't actually enjoy being right about these things. 413 00:19:01,581 --> 00:19:03,061 - Well, I know that's a lie. 414 00:19:03,101 --> 00:19:04,341 - Are you okay? 415 00:19:04,461 --> 00:19:05,541 - Yeah. 416 00:19:05,581 --> 00:19:06,821 Are you? 417 00:19:06,901 --> 00:19:07,941 - Oh, there's Melody. 418 00:19:09,581 --> 00:19:11,821 - Did you and Ruth work things out? 419 00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,341 - Yep, all sorted. 420 00:19:13,461 --> 00:19:15,261 - Oh, see? What did I tell you? 421 00:19:15,341 --> 00:19:17,661 Sisters, you'll always work it out. 422 00:19:18,821 --> 00:19:20,741 - Melody! 423 00:19:25,501 --> 00:19:28,101 Hey, you finish Deepak's statement? 424 00:19:28,181 --> 00:19:30,461 - I thought you were doing that. - I'm just a bit stuck. 425 00:19:30,541 --> 00:19:31,941 - What's the matter with you? 426 00:19:32,021 --> 00:19:34,101 You look like you've been caught masturbating 427 00:19:34,181 --> 00:19:36,461 - over your brother's baby album. - I'm just working. 428 00:19:36,541 --> 00:19:38,181 - Why are you covering your face? - I'm not. 429 00:19:38,261 --> 00:19:39,461 - Why are you holding your laptop like that? 430 00:19:39,541 --> 00:19:40,741 - I'm reading. 431 00:19:42,821 --> 00:19:45,821 - What in Tina Turner's tiny tits 432 00:19:45,901 --> 00:19:48,541 has happened to your nose? 433 00:19:48,581 --> 00:19:50,541 - Is that a piercing? 434 00:19:50,581 --> 00:19:53,061 - Is that Winnie-the-Pooh getting a neck tattoo? 435 00:19:53,101 --> 00:19:55,021 (sarcastic laughs) 436 00:19:55,101 --> 00:19:57,581 - Okay guys, come on. What have you got so far? 437 00:19:59,341 --> 00:20:02,661 - Hello, ladies and gentlemen. - Is that it? 438 00:20:02,741 --> 00:20:05,501 - Well, I tried a bunch of other stuff and it all sounded disingenuous. 439 00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:08,061 - It's disingenuous. You're a 25-year-old Scottish girl 440 00:20:08,101 --> 00:20:10,101 writing a heartfelt speech on behalf of a 441 00:20:10,221 --> 00:20:13,541 37-year-old half-Pakistani male TV presenter. 442 00:20:13,581 --> 00:20:15,101 We are disingenuous. 443 00:20:15,221 --> 00:20:18,021 - You can't spell unscrupulous, without a P and an R. 444 00:20:18,101 --> 00:20:19,981 - (slight laughs) - Very clever. 445 00:20:20,061 --> 00:20:22,661 - Yes, I know. Caroline said it once. 446 00:20:22,741 --> 00:20:25,341 I've been waiting for an opportunity to use it since. 447 00:20:26,421 --> 00:20:27,661 - Can I have one of those? 448 00:20:27,741 --> 00:20:29,341 - But if you have one of these 449 00:20:29,461 --> 00:20:31,021 will the smoke come out of the hole in your nose 450 00:20:31,101 --> 00:20:32,501 like a Pixies chimney? 451 00:20:32,581 --> 00:20:33,821 - Oh! - (laughs) 452 00:20:33,941 --> 00:20:35,941 (phone rings) 453 00:20:37,741 --> 00:20:40,261 (sighs) Oh God, Jesus! 454 00:20:40,341 --> 00:20:41,541 But she's just gonna leave it on a message 455 00:20:41,581 --> 00:20:43,341 saying absolutely nothing. 456 00:20:43,461 --> 00:20:45,781 Just, "It's Mom!" 457 00:20:45,821 --> 00:20:47,501 She's already left messages saying, 458 00:20:47,581 --> 00:20:49,501 "It's Mom," three of them. 459 00:20:49,581 --> 00:20:51,701 I mean, she has a phone. She knows how, voice mail works. 460 00:20:51,781 --> 00:20:53,701 She knows that leaving multiple messages 461 00:20:53,781 --> 00:20:56,221 just means I have to sit through, "It's Mom! " 462 00:20:56,301 --> 00:20:58,541 - That's the thing about mothers. 463 00:20:58,581 --> 00:21:00,781 They're like terminators. 464 00:21:00,821 --> 00:21:03,301 They can't be bargained with, they can't be reasoned with, 465 00:21:03,341 --> 00:21:05,701 they don't feel pity or fear or remorse, 466 00:21:05,781 --> 00:21:09,501 and it absolutely will not stop, ever, 467 00:21:09,581 --> 00:21:11,181 until you're dead. 468 00:21:12,581 --> 00:21:14,661 - I'm sorry about your dad. 469 00:21:14,741 --> 00:21:17,741 - Um, sorry about your stuff. 470 00:21:19,661 --> 00:21:21,101 - I'm going to request 471 00:21:21,221 --> 00:21:22,701 that neither of you is sorry 472 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,661 about my breakup. 473 00:21:24,741 --> 00:21:26,301 Dodged a bullet, definitely, 474 00:21:26,341 --> 00:21:28,981 and I got three pleasantries out of it, so ultimately, 475 00:21:29,061 --> 00:21:30,741 I'm up. 476 00:21:33,741 --> 00:21:36,261 - So anyone want a fun size Milky Way? 477 00:21:38,421 --> 00:21:41,301 (upbeat music) 478 00:21:46,101 --> 00:21:48,701 - Where's my fucking coffee? Oh! 479 00:21:48,781 --> 00:21:50,701 - Why's my Dexy's Midnight Runnere here? 480 00:21:50,781 --> 00:21:52,261 - Well, clean her up and get me another coffee. 481 00:21:52,341 --> 00:21:54,821 - Actually, it's they. - Excuse me? 482 00:21:54,941 --> 00:21:57,101 - I mean, it's not her. It's they. 483 00:21:57,181 --> 00:21:59,301 Oh, is it? I'm dreadfully sorry. 484 00:21:59,341 --> 00:22:02,021 But if they don't get off their skinny little beret-wearing ass 485 00:22:02,101 --> 00:22:03,821 and make us another coffee, 486 00:22:03,941 --> 00:22:07,141 proper pronouns will be the least of their worries. 487 00:22:07,221 --> 00:22:09,221 Coffee! And I want it blacker and stronger 488 00:22:09,301 --> 00:22:10,661 than a Senegalese bodybuilder. 489 00:22:10,741 --> 00:22:12,501 - Got it? - Yeah. 490 00:22:14,181 --> 00:22:15,781 (sighs) 491 00:22:15,861 --> 00:22:18,061 What's Twitter saying about Cheryl and Danny. 492 00:22:18,141 --> 00:22:20,141 - I'd say, on the whole, it's still supportive. 493 00:22:20,221 --> 00:22:24,141 30%, I don't believe it, 20%, boys will be boys 494 00:22:24,221 --> 00:22:25,741 and 40%, it's entrapment. 495 00:22:25,821 --> 00:22:27,421 - And the other 10%? 496 00:22:27,501 --> 00:22:28,661 - She's naughtier than that fit. 497 00:22:28,741 --> 00:22:30,581 - (phone rings) - Shit! 498 00:22:32,941 --> 00:22:35,261 - Yes. - How's my favorite stepmom? 499 00:22:35,341 --> 00:22:37,181 - Damian, I'm right in the middle of something so 500 00:22:37,261 --> 00:22:38,221 - I can't really... - Big finally. 501 00:22:38,301 --> 00:22:39,661 - I thought you might be. 502 00:22:39,741 --> 00:22:40,901 What a nightmare, eh? 503 00:22:40,981 --> 00:22:42,621 Still, boys will be boys. 504 00:22:42,701 --> 00:22:44,261 - As much as I'd love to chat... 505 00:22:44,341 --> 00:22:45,581 - Don't worry, this won't take long. 506 00:22:45,661 --> 00:22:47,661 I just wanted to pick up a few documents 507 00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:49,381 so I'd drop by the office. 508 00:22:49,461 --> 00:22:51,341 I hope you don't mind. 509 00:22:51,421 --> 00:22:52,741 - What did you just say? 510 00:22:52,821 --> 00:22:54,901 - The doorman was cool about letting me in, eh? 511 00:22:54,981 --> 00:22:57,221 I guess it helps when your name's on the sign, right? 512 00:22:57,301 --> 00:22:58,741 - Damian, Damian! 513 00:22:58,821 --> 00:23:01,381 - This is a cute picture of you and Dad. 514 00:23:01,461 --> 00:23:03,861 - Can I get a copy? - Get out of my office. 515 00:23:03,941 --> 00:23:05,381 - It's a shame you're not around for coffee, 516 00:23:05,461 --> 00:23:06,981 it would have been nice to catch up. 517 00:23:07,061 --> 00:23:08,981 - If you touch anything in my office! 518 00:23:09,061 --> 00:23:11,501 - So anyway, I had a chat with our lawyers, 519 00:23:11,581 --> 00:23:14,461 and apparently if a major shareholder wanted to get rid 520 00:23:14,541 --> 00:23:16,941 of a company director without risking a major litigation 521 00:23:17,021 --> 00:23:18,661 for unfair dismissal, 522 00:23:18,741 --> 00:23:22,341 then they'd have to offer proof of gross misconduct. 523 00:23:22,421 --> 00:23:24,741 - Damian, don't do this. 524 00:23:24,821 --> 00:23:27,301 - What would constitute as gross misconduct, I hear you ask? 525 00:23:27,381 --> 00:23:30,421 Well, apparently, evidence of anything unprofessional 526 00:23:30,501 --> 00:23:34,181 or illegal, you know, like bribery, blackmail, 527 00:23:34,261 --> 00:23:36,581 interfering with police investigations, 528 00:23:36,661 --> 00:23:39,301 harassment, defamation. 529 00:23:39,381 --> 00:23:41,301 You know, all that kind of grubby stuff. 530 00:23:42,621 --> 00:23:45,501 - Damian, listen, I'm begging you. 531 00:23:45,581 --> 00:23:46,821 Don't do this. 532 00:23:46,901 --> 00:23:48,621 - It isn't easy, but apparently 533 00:23:48,701 --> 00:23:50,181 if you can offer proof of such behavior, 534 00:23:50,261 --> 00:23:53,661 then actually removing someone from their 535 00:23:53,741 --> 00:23:56,421 position is 536 00:23:56,501 --> 00:23:58,261 actually quite straightforward. 537 00:23:58,341 --> 00:24:00,381 Obviously what usually happens is 538 00:24:00,461 --> 00:24:02,661 both parties get into a room and talk to each other 539 00:24:02,741 --> 00:24:04,421 and try to come to some sort of 540 00:24:04,501 --> 00:24:07,381 mutually beneficial agreement which allows both parties 541 00:24:07,461 --> 00:24:08,821 to get what they want 542 00:24:08,901 --> 00:24:11,141 whilst not having to go through the embarrassing 543 00:24:11,221 --> 00:24:13,581 and costly rigmarole of a court case. 544 00:24:13,661 --> 00:24:16,181 So anyway, on a completely unrelated matter, 545 00:24:16,261 --> 00:24:17,541 I was wondering if I could take you for dinner. 546 00:24:17,621 --> 00:24:19,301 Are you around next week? 547 00:24:19,381 --> 00:24:21,301 How about Wednesday? 548 00:24:21,381 --> 00:24:22,301 You know, I think I might have a flair 549 00:24:22,381 --> 00:24:23,701 for this kind of work. 550 00:24:23,781 --> 00:24:26,421 I wonder if I get that from Dad or you. 551 00:24:37,461 --> 00:24:39,541 Bell, call the lawyers. 552 00:24:41,821 --> 00:24:43,021 We're going to war. 553 00:24:44,461 --> 00:24:45,861 (rock music) 554 00:24:56,941 --> 00:24:58,741 - Danny! 555 00:25:03,581 --> 00:25:05,381 What the fuck? 556 00:25:05,461 --> 00:25:07,861 Danny? 557 00:25:15,461 --> 00:25:17,021 (sniffs) 558 00:25:36,101 --> 00:25:37,621 - Okay. 559 00:25:37,701 --> 00:25:40,221 So, obviously, the script has changed to accommodate 560 00:25:40,301 --> 00:25:42,661 the new situation, 561 00:25:42,741 --> 00:25:44,501 but the set pieces are all as previously discussed. 562 00:25:44,581 --> 00:25:47,061 So the plan is just to run things absolutely as normal. 563 00:25:47,141 --> 00:25:48,661 Sound good? 564 00:25:51,941 --> 00:25:54,621 - Deepak, darling, I've got your opening statement here. 565 00:25:58,461 --> 00:26:01,181 - Are they going to change the autocue? 566 00:26:02,661 --> 00:26:05,181 - Sorry? - (stammering) 567 00:26:05,261 --> 00:26:08,701 - Are we still gonna have Danny's lines on the autocue? 568 00:26:08,781 --> 00:26:12,021 'Cause I think if he's not gonna be here, 569 00:26:12,101 --> 00:26:14,261 it's gonna be kind of confusing. 570 00:26:16,221 --> 00:26:19,141 - No, I'm sure they're going to change the autocue. 571 00:26:19,221 --> 00:26:20,741 - Deepak, are you okay? 572 00:26:20,821 --> 00:26:22,581 - Hmm? Oh, yeah. 573 00:26:22,661 --> 00:26:23,621 I'm good. 574 00:26:23,701 --> 00:26:25,581 - Mirinda gave me, like, 575 00:26:25,661 --> 00:26:27,301 quite a few of her beta blockers, 576 00:26:27,381 --> 00:26:29,821 because I was having a teeny-weeny panic attack. 577 00:26:29,901 --> 00:26:31,581 But I'm fine now. 578 00:26:31,661 --> 00:26:32,781 Feel good! 579 00:26:34,701 --> 00:26:36,861 Do I look okay? 'Cause I feel kind of thembly. 580 00:26:40,381 --> 00:26:42,101 - Sorry, darling, you feel what? 581 00:26:42,181 --> 00:26:44,061 - Thembly. Fambly? 582 00:26:44,141 --> 00:26:45,421 Is that a word? 583 00:26:45,501 --> 00:26:48,741 - I think that's a word. 584 00:26:48,821 --> 00:26:50,861 - Well, what am I thinking of? 585 00:26:50,941 --> 00:26:52,421 Fambly? 586 00:26:52,501 --> 00:26:55,101 Fumbly? 587 00:26:55,181 --> 00:26:57,101 - Deepak, darling, I really need you to get it together, 588 00:26:57,181 --> 00:26:59,501 because there are a of people counting on you here. 589 00:26:59,581 --> 00:27:02,501 - I can get it together. 590 00:27:02,581 --> 00:27:04,181 I'm a professional. 591 00:27:04,261 --> 00:27:05,821 - We need to get him some coffee. 592 00:27:05,901 --> 00:27:07,021 None of this instant, okay? 593 00:27:07,101 --> 00:27:10,421 Killer horse coffee! 594 00:27:10,501 --> 00:27:11,821 Would you check this and get it loaded in? 595 00:27:11,901 --> 00:27:14,181 - Yeah. 596 00:27:14,261 --> 00:27:16,901 - George, I'm feeling a little freaked out, man. 597 00:27:16,981 --> 00:27:18,541 Are you in there? 598 00:27:20,261 --> 00:27:22,221 - Okay, I've got the details on Danny's baby mama. 599 00:27:22,301 --> 00:27:23,981 Her name is Cheryl Beans, 600 00:27:24,061 --> 00:27:25,661 and I've lifted some photos from her Instagram. 601 00:27:25,741 --> 00:27:28,101 - She's a sex worker, there must be something sluttier. 602 00:27:28,181 --> 00:27:30,621 It's got to be filth. We need something that says desperate and dishonest. 603 00:27:30,701 --> 00:27:33,741 That's perfect, the Halloween one. 604 00:27:33,821 --> 00:27:35,621 Contact the unattractive boy she went to school with. 605 00:27:35,701 --> 00:27:37,461 They'll have something to say about her for sure. 606 00:27:37,541 --> 00:27:39,181 And make sure that no one is offering her anything, 607 00:27:39,261 --> 00:27:40,901 if they are, double it. 608 00:27:40,981 --> 00:27:42,301 We bring her into the fold. 609 00:27:42,381 --> 00:27:43,661 She becomes part of our strategy, 610 00:27:43,741 --> 00:27:45,381 and we use her as we see fit. 611 00:27:45,461 --> 00:27:46,261 - Understood. 612 00:27:47,901 --> 00:27:49,701 - Eve! Danny's gone. 613 00:27:49,781 --> 00:27:50,941 - What! - What do you mean gone? 614 00:27:51,021 --> 00:27:52,381 - He's gone, he's escaped. 615 00:27:52,461 --> 00:27:53,581 He's crawled out the fucking window. 616 00:27:53,661 --> 00:27:55,341 - Oh, Jesus Christ! 617 00:27:55,421 --> 00:27:57,261 - Okay, you check with security, you check the studio, 618 00:27:57,341 --> 00:27:58,901 I need to check the loft. 619 00:27:58,981 --> 00:28:00,301 - But the show is supposed to go live in 30 minutes. 620 00:28:00,381 --> 00:28:01,941 - Then we better fucking hurry! 621 00:28:05,701 --> 00:28:06,901 - Update! 622 00:28:06,981 --> 00:28:08,341 - Wait. - Danny disappeared. 623 00:28:08,421 --> 00:28:09,341 - Disappeared, how? 624 00:28:09,421 --> 00:28:10,741 - He crawled out of a window. 625 00:28:10,821 --> 00:28:12,101 - This is a new piercing? 626 00:28:12,181 --> 00:28:13,061 - Don't tell me I look like Minnie Mouse 627 00:28:13,141 --> 00:28:14,661 with a nipple ring, 628 00:28:14,741 --> 00:28:16,421 or a Bambi with a shaved head 629 00:28:16,501 --> 00:28:18,141 or an altar in a gimp suit. 630 00:28:18,221 --> 00:28:20,141 - I was going to say that one's nice. 631 00:28:20,221 --> 00:28:22,381 - Oh, oh, thank you. 632 00:28:23,661 --> 00:28:24,821 - Okay. 633 00:28:27,581 --> 00:28:30,621 - Hey, I've looking for you. 634 00:28:30,701 --> 00:28:32,701 - Oh, my goodness! Thank you, this is so exciting. 635 00:28:32,781 --> 00:28:34,781 - But, I'm only in on one condition. 636 00:28:34,861 --> 00:28:36,221 - What's that? 637 00:28:36,301 --> 00:28:38,461 - That I get to deal with you personally. 638 00:28:38,541 --> 00:28:40,541 - I don't really get my own clients yet. 639 00:28:40,621 --> 00:28:42,141 - Well, I guess I'm your first. 640 00:28:45,621 --> 00:28:47,221 All right, well, 641 00:28:47,301 --> 00:28:48,901 I'm off to disappoint nine million people 642 00:28:48,981 --> 00:28:50,341 by not being Danny Davis. 643 00:28:50,421 --> 00:28:52,381 - You'll smash it. 644 00:29:01,141 --> 00:29:02,741 - (vehicle horn beeps) 645 00:29:12,981 --> 00:29:15,461 - Oh my God! There you are. 646 00:29:15,541 --> 00:29:17,581 I thought I was gonna find you naked somewhere 647 00:29:17,661 --> 00:29:19,421 banging seven gram rocks, 648 00:29:19,501 --> 00:29:21,221 drinking tiger blood. 649 00:29:21,301 --> 00:29:23,661 - Not winning. - (chuckles) 650 00:29:23,741 --> 00:29:25,821 - Were you thinking about it? 651 00:29:25,901 --> 00:29:27,981 - Are you mental? 652 00:29:28,061 --> 00:29:30,661 If I was gonna kill myself, I wouldn't jump off a building, 653 00:29:30,741 --> 00:29:32,421 particularly a TV studio. 654 00:29:32,501 --> 00:29:35,261 What an extravagant act of egotism that would be. 655 00:29:35,341 --> 00:29:37,261 Besides, we're not high enough, are we? 656 00:29:37,341 --> 00:29:39,621 Probably just break both my legs. 657 00:29:39,701 --> 00:29:43,141 Do you know how embarrassing that would be? (chuckles) 658 00:29:43,221 --> 00:29:47,141 - Did you know that there's this volcano in Japan called Mount Mihara, 659 00:29:47,221 --> 00:29:50,861 and in the '30s, some chick killed herself by throwing herself into the crater. 660 00:29:50,941 --> 00:29:53,421 - Alfredo fell into a volcano. 661 00:29:53,501 --> 00:29:56,861 - Then the next year, 944 other people 662 00:29:56,941 --> 00:29:58,181 copied her, 663 00:29:58,261 --> 00:29:59,541 jumped into the same crater. 664 00:29:59,621 --> 00:30:01,221 - Smart move. 665 00:30:01,301 --> 00:30:03,461 - High drama, low maintenance. - Exactly. 666 00:30:03,541 --> 00:30:05,181 Sounds good too. "How did he die?" 667 00:30:05,261 --> 00:30:06,221 "Jumped into a volcano." 668 00:30:06,301 --> 00:30:07,581 "Oh fair." 669 00:30:09,261 --> 00:30:11,021 - How would you do it? 670 00:30:11,101 --> 00:30:13,101 - Cut myself. 671 00:30:13,181 --> 00:30:14,701 No. 672 00:30:14,781 --> 00:30:16,901 Pills, probably. 673 00:30:16,981 --> 00:30:20,701 The lethal cocktail of alcohol and drugs. 674 00:30:20,781 --> 00:30:23,341 That's what they say in the press, don't they? 675 00:30:23,421 --> 00:30:25,701 Go out in a four-day coke bender. 676 00:30:25,781 --> 00:30:28,021 Binging, banging, 677 00:30:28,101 --> 00:30:30,741 snorting, 678 00:30:30,821 --> 00:30:33,581 until my heart gives out. 679 00:30:33,661 --> 00:30:35,621 weird as plumb, 680 00:30:35,701 --> 00:30:37,501 teeth ground down to stumps. 681 00:30:39,221 --> 00:30:40,301 You? 682 00:30:41,301 --> 00:30:43,301 - Book myself a cruise, 683 00:30:43,381 --> 00:30:45,221 all inclusive, 684 00:30:45,301 --> 00:30:47,541 somewhere beautiful, somewhere remote. 685 00:30:47,621 --> 00:30:50,941 And then, one night put on a nice dress, 686 00:30:51,021 --> 00:30:53,341 go up on deck and all you'd see 687 00:30:53,421 --> 00:30:55,781 in any direction was just, 688 00:30:55,861 --> 00:30:59,541 the moon light rippling and reflecting off the dark water, 689 00:30:59,621 --> 00:31:00,941 infinite. 690 00:31:01,021 --> 00:31:03,221 Have a couple of Martinis, 691 00:31:03,301 --> 00:31:05,181 and then I'd pop a couple Xanax 692 00:31:05,261 --> 00:31:08,781 and just... 693 00:31:08,861 --> 00:31:10,901 step over the side and disappear forever. 694 00:31:14,101 --> 00:31:15,221 - Christ! 695 00:31:16,581 --> 00:31:18,821 I thought was morbid. 696 00:31:18,901 --> 00:31:20,421 I might have to read some Sylvia Plath 697 00:31:20,501 --> 00:31:21,981 just to cheer myself up. 698 00:31:24,701 --> 00:31:26,261 You know, in rehab, 699 00:31:26,341 --> 00:31:28,701 they're always talking about rock bottoms. 700 00:31:28,781 --> 00:31:30,461 This was my rock bottom. 701 00:31:30,541 --> 00:31:33,021 No, no. No, this was my rock bottom. 702 00:31:33,101 --> 00:31:34,901 Every time I think I've reached mine, 703 00:31:34,981 --> 00:31:38,021 I just seem to bounce straight back off it again. 704 00:31:38,101 --> 00:31:41,541 It's like a serial killer revisiting the scene of a crime. 705 00:31:43,021 --> 00:31:45,021 They wanna to get caught. 706 00:31:45,101 --> 00:31:46,741 They want it to stop. 707 00:31:49,381 --> 00:31:51,941 Or be stopped. 708 00:31:52,021 --> 00:31:54,301 But everyone just keeps the train on the tracks, 709 00:31:54,381 --> 00:31:56,261 'cause it's worth so much. 710 00:31:56,341 --> 00:31:58,741 Lawyers, managers, you. 711 00:32:01,141 --> 00:32:02,421 I've really fucked it, haven't I? 712 00:32:02,501 --> 00:32:04,701 - Bitch, join the club. 713 00:32:04,781 --> 00:32:06,421 (phone rings) 714 00:32:06,501 --> 00:32:07,901 Hang one sec. 715 00:32:12,141 --> 00:32:13,701 I can't do this right now. 716 00:32:13,781 --> 00:32:15,181 - I'm here. 717 00:32:15,261 --> 00:32:16,341 - What do you mean, you're here? 718 00:32:16,421 --> 00:32:17,621 - I'm at the studio. 719 00:32:17,701 --> 00:32:19,221 - Why? 720 00:32:19,301 --> 00:32:21,141 - I thought I could grab Caroline for a little chat 721 00:32:21,221 --> 00:32:23,181 about my exclusive. 722 00:32:23,261 --> 00:32:25,421 - If she sees you, she will kill you. 723 00:32:25,501 --> 00:32:27,501 - It's lucky I got you to look after me then. 724 00:32:27,581 --> 00:32:28,701 - Fuck you, Reese. 725 00:32:28,781 --> 00:32:30,261 You can't blackmail me. 726 00:32:30,341 --> 00:32:31,581 - I'm not blackmailing you. 727 00:32:31,661 --> 00:32:33,341 I'm using you to get what I want, 728 00:32:33,421 --> 00:32:35,341 which is exactly what you've always done with me. 729 00:32:35,421 --> 00:32:36,501 - That's not fair. 730 00:32:36,581 --> 00:32:37,861 - Life's not fair, babes. 731 00:32:37,941 --> 00:32:39,541 It wasn't fair when you ghosted me 732 00:32:39,621 --> 00:32:41,461 after eight fucking months together, was it? 733 00:32:41,541 --> 00:32:42,941 Shit happens, eh? 734 00:32:43,021 --> 00:32:44,541 Let's not pretend this is personal, yeah? 735 00:32:48,701 --> 00:32:50,501 - STD clinic? 736 00:32:50,581 --> 00:32:52,821 (chuckles) 737 00:32:55,701 --> 00:32:57,501 - James, I'm not being funny, but a man came 738 00:32:57,581 --> 00:32:58,821 - out through the window. - I've not seen him. 739 00:32:58,901 --> 00:33:00,341 - Sorry! - Where is he? 740 00:33:00,421 --> 00:33:02,101 - Let me in, I need to talk to Danny Davis. 741 00:33:02,181 --> 00:33:03,661 Danny Davis! 742 00:33:03,741 --> 00:33:05,661 - I know he's fucking in there. - Hello. Hi, there. 743 00:33:05,741 --> 00:33:08,221 - Where's Danny? - She can't come in without a pass. 744 00:33:08,301 --> 00:33:09,541 - Okay. Fine. She's with me. 745 00:33:09,621 --> 00:33:11,461 So we'll just... 746 00:33:11,541 --> 00:33:13,101 - You're Cheryl, right? - Who are you? 747 00:33:13,181 --> 00:33:15,621 - I'm Melody. I worked for Danny's PR. - What? 748 00:33:15,701 --> 00:33:18,661 - We do press and... - I know what PR is. I'm not an idiot. 749 00:33:18,741 --> 00:33:21,021 I mean, why am I talking to you? I wanna talk to Danny. 750 00:33:21,101 --> 00:33:23,701 - Well, you can't right now, because Danny is getting ready for the show. 751 00:33:23,781 --> 00:33:26,181 - Yeah, I don't care if he's having a high tea with the queen of fucking Denmark. 752 00:33:26,261 --> 00:33:28,461 Why have I got journalists calling my home, 753 00:33:28,541 --> 00:33:31,661 - talking about my son? - (phone rings) 754 00:33:31,741 --> 00:33:33,541 - Look, no, you can't. Stop! 755 00:33:33,621 --> 00:33:35,141 Right, stop! 756 00:33:35,221 --> 00:33:36,781 How much? 757 00:33:36,861 --> 00:33:37,901 - Excuse me? 758 00:33:37,981 --> 00:33:38,981 - How much, 759 00:33:39,061 --> 00:33:40,821 just to make it all go away? 760 00:33:40,901 --> 00:33:41,901 - Make it go away? 761 00:33:43,061 --> 00:33:44,621 Make what go away? 762 00:33:44,701 --> 00:33:46,901 My son? 763 00:33:46,981 --> 00:33:48,941 I don't want any of his money. 764 00:33:49,021 --> 00:33:51,661 I never did, I earn my money, thank you. 765 00:33:51,741 --> 00:33:53,021 That's the problem with you people. 766 00:33:53,101 --> 00:33:54,941 You just assume that everyone can be bought. 767 00:33:55,021 --> 00:33:57,301 - Oh, come on. That's a bit rich coming from-- 768 00:33:57,381 --> 00:33:59,221 - Coming from what? 769 00:33:59,301 --> 00:34:02,061 No, no, go on. Coming from what? 770 00:34:02,141 --> 00:34:04,261 Prostitute? 771 00:34:04,341 --> 00:34:06,221 A whore? 772 00:34:06,301 --> 00:34:07,541 Scarlet woman? 773 00:34:08,941 --> 00:34:10,501 (sighs) 774 00:34:10,581 --> 00:34:12,981 You know what? You're probably right. 775 00:34:13,061 --> 00:34:15,221 Maybe I should forfeit any highfalutin ambition 776 00:34:15,301 --> 00:34:17,661 for being treated like an actual human being. 777 00:34:17,741 --> 00:34:19,821 - No, I'm just asking that you don't speak to any media. 778 00:34:19,901 --> 00:34:22,741 - Why would I want to talk to the fucking media? 779 00:34:22,821 --> 00:34:24,661 So can be called a slag? 780 00:34:24,781 --> 00:34:26,061 I don't want to talk to anyone. 781 00:34:26,141 --> 00:34:27,621 I don't want my 15 minutes. 782 00:34:27,661 --> 00:34:30,301 I don't want anybody's money. 783 00:34:30,381 --> 00:34:34,501 I earned 120 grand last year, after tax. 784 00:34:34,581 --> 00:34:39,181 All I want is for me and my boy to be left alone... 785 00:34:39,301 --> 00:34:40,301 so he can be normal. 786 00:34:40,381 --> 00:34:42,501 That is all I've ever wanted. 787 00:34:45,581 --> 00:34:47,661 And he promised. (sobs) 788 00:34:48,821 --> 00:34:50,301 - Oh God, don't cry. 789 00:34:53,381 --> 00:34:56,661 I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean all that. 790 00:34:56,781 --> 00:35:02,101 Come on, let's just take a breather, will we? 791 00:35:06,901 --> 00:35:08,661 - Why do I behave like this? 792 00:35:08,701 --> 00:35:10,541 I go after people like me, like 793 00:35:11,661 --> 00:35:14,381 I'm the one ruining in his life. 794 00:35:14,461 --> 00:35:17,181 I just want him to take responsibility for their actions. 795 00:35:18,461 --> 00:35:20,661 And if there's no consequence, 796 00:35:20,701 --> 00:35:24,621 - he will never stop. - (phone rings) 797 00:35:26,141 --> 00:35:28,981 - I'm so sorry. 798 00:35:29,061 --> 00:35:30,141 Give me one minute. 799 00:35:32,061 --> 00:35:33,181 Mom, what! 800 00:35:33,221 --> 00:35:34,901 - Melody, I need to talk to you. 801 00:35:34,981 --> 00:35:36,461 - Mom, I'm at work. 802 00:35:36,541 --> 00:35:37,661 - It's important. 803 00:35:37,781 --> 00:35:39,661 - My job is fucking important. 804 00:35:39,781 --> 00:35:42,421 - Your dad's been moved to a hospice. 805 00:35:42,501 --> 00:35:44,301 He's been deteriorating over the last week. 806 00:35:44,381 --> 00:35:46,821 I mean, can't care for him and keep them comfortable so, 807 00:35:46,901 --> 00:35:48,381 they're gonna move him. 808 00:35:48,461 --> 00:35:49,941 If you want to make sure you get to see him, 809 00:35:50,021 --> 00:35:51,661 you should get on a train. 810 00:35:51,701 --> 00:35:55,381 It's hard to know exactly how much time he's got. 811 00:35:55,461 --> 00:35:57,461 - Danny! 812 00:35:57,541 --> 00:35:59,501 - Oh, fuck! 813 00:36:04,341 --> 00:36:05,701 - How you doing, man? 814 00:36:12,421 --> 00:36:14,301 Eve? Eve! 815 00:36:14,381 --> 00:36:15,901 Reese is here. 816 00:36:15,981 --> 00:36:18,061 - What! Why! 817 00:36:18,141 --> 00:36:19,661 - She wants to tell-all exclusive with Danny, 818 00:36:19,701 --> 00:36:21,021 all about his love for the child, 819 00:36:21,101 --> 00:36:22,461 and his shame and his recovery. 820 00:36:22,541 --> 00:36:23,701 - Are you having a fucking bubble bath? 821 00:36:23,821 --> 00:36:25,101 - She fucks over Caroline 822 00:36:25,181 --> 00:36:26,101 and know she wants another exclusive? 823 00:36:26,181 --> 00:36:27,181 - We need to fix it. 824 00:36:27,301 --> 00:36:28,861 We need to make a deal, come on. 825 00:36:28,941 --> 00:36:29,821 - Watch him. 826 00:36:29,901 --> 00:36:32,061 A deal! 827 00:36:32,141 --> 00:36:34,541 - We know Reese. - We know she is a snake, 828 00:36:34,621 --> 00:36:36,301 who would sell her own mother into sex trafficking ring, 829 00:36:36,381 --> 00:36:37,941 if it means she gets a story out of it. 830 00:36:38,021 --> 00:36:39,501 Caroline would never go for it. 831 00:36:39,581 --> 00:36:40,661 - I think Caroline is a little stressed 832 00:36:40,781 --> 00:36:41,861 and she's not thinking clearly. 833 00:36:41,941 --> 00:36:44,421 - Well, they already had a deal. 834 00:36:44,501 --> 00:36:46,141 - Or, I was just thinking that maybe 835 00:36:46,181 --> 00:36:48,461 if you and I could figure something out, you know. 836 00:36:48,541 --> 00:36:50,101 I know Reese. 837 00:36:50,181 --> 00:36:51,621 I know how to get what I want from her. 838 00:36:51,661 --> 00:36:53,101 - Oh, really? Because from what I've seen, 839 00:36:53,181 --> 00:36:55,461 she knows how to get what she wants from you. 840 00:36:55,541 --> 00:36:57,181 - You know what? I'll figure it out myself. 841 00:36:57,221 --> 00:37:01,301 - Rob! - Caroline, Reese is here. 842 00:37:01,381 --> 00:37:02,381 - Hey. 843 00:37:05,381 --> 00:37:07,421 - Your pal, Abigail here, 844 00:37:07,501 --> 00:37:10,301 was just offering an exclusive with Danny, 845 00:37:10,381 --> 00:37:12,461 letting him tell his side of the story, warts and all. 846 00:37:12,541 --> 00:37:16,221 Reckons we might even be able to tie it in with a book deal as well. 847 00:37:16,341 --> 00:37:19,501 What do you think we should do? 848 00:37:19,581 --> 00:37:22,141 - Well, I think, as the one who broke the story, 849 00:37:22,181 --> 00:37:24,021 gives the piece an interesting angle. 850 00:37:24,101 --> 00:37:26,861 She says that she genuinely believes in his repentance. 851 00:37:26,941 --> 00:37:30,221 It could land it a certain credibility. 852 00:37:34,541 --> 00:37:36,941 - I had the same thought exactly. 853 00:37:37,021 --> 00:37:38,421 Okay, Mrs. Reese. 854 00:37:38,501 --> 00:37:41,341 You can have your story on one condition. 855 00:37:41,421 --> 00:37:42,661 - And what's that? 856 00:37:42,781 --> 00:37:45,621 - You tell me who your source is. 857 00:37:45,661 --> 00:37:47,181 - Caroline, you know that as a journalist, 858 00:37:47,301 --> 00:37:50,821 my number one commandment is to protect my sources. 859 00:37:50,901 --> 00:37:52,301 (chuckles) 860 00:37:52,381 --> 00:37:55,501 - Take it or leave it. 861 00:38:00,301 --> 00:38:02,661 - Fine, she knew what she was getting herself into. 862 00:38:09,781 --> 00:38:10,901 It was Melody. 863 00:38:12,821 --> 00:38:15,021 - Melody? 864 00:38:15,101 --> 00:38:17,301 - The little Scottish one, that's her name, isn't it? 865 00:38:17,381 --> 00:38:19,541 Don't be too harsh on her. She's just playing the game. 866 00:38:19,621 --> 00:38:21,341 The plan was I tip her off next time something big was gonna go down 867 00:38:21,421 --> 00:38:22,781 with one of your clients 868 00:38:22,861 --> 00:38:25,421 and she'd swarm in and saved the day. 869 00:38:25,501 --> 00:38:26,661 - Deepak! 870 00:38:26,701 --> 00:38:31,381 - (screams) - (clatters) 871 00:38:31,461 --> 00:38:33,301 - Tits! 872 00:38:36,141 --> 00:38:38,141 - You told them about Cheryl. 873 00:38:38,181 --> 00:38:40,181 You promised, you fucking promised. 874 00:38:40,301 --> 00:38:41,701 - I never told them anything. 875 00:38:41,821 --> 00:38:42,901 Get off me. 876 00:38:48,021 --> 00:38:49,381 - Get off me, get off! 877 00:38:49,461 --> 00:38:51,341 - Go, go, go. 878 00:38:51,421 --> 00:38:54,101 - Daniel, get off him right now. 879 00:38:58,141 --> 00:39:00,141 - Why, eh? Why? 880 00:39:00,181 --> 00:39:02,861 Is it because I went on Graham Norton without you? 881 00:39:02,941 --> 00:39:05,021 - No, I never wanted to go on Graham Norton. 882 00:39:05,101 --> 00:39:06,821 I'm fine. I'm fine. 883 00:39:09,821 --> 00:39:11,301 - That's for breaking my Radio Times award. 884 00:39:11,381 --> 00:39:13,421 - I think you should go... - And Holly Willoughby 885 00:39:13,501 --> 00:39:15,501 - didn't forget to invite you to her fondue party. 886 00:39:15,581 --> 00:39:17,301 She didn't invite you because she thinks you're a twat. 887 00:39:17,381 --> 00:39:21,181 - Well, you only got this job because of affirmative action. 888 00:39:21,221 --> 00:39:24,101 - You only got this job because you got special needs. 889 00:39:24,181 --> 00:39:26,181 - ADHD, is not special needs! 890 00:39:26,301 --> 00:39:27,621 - Okay, enough, enough! 891 00:39:27,661 --> 00:39:30,181 - I never told him anything, you bloody idiot. 892 00:39:30,301 --> 00:39:31,941 - Just admit it. 893 00:39:32,021 --> 00:39:33,621 - Why would I want to do this without you? 894 00:39:33,661 --> 00:39:36,181 It's twice as much work. And you're the funny one. 895 00:39:36,221 --> 00:39:38,341 - When will you bloody realize how good you got it 896 00:39:38,421 --> 00:39:40,021 and stop messing everything up for yourself? 897 00:39:40,101 --> 00:39:42,061 This boy bloody loves you. 898 00:39:42,141 --> 00:39:44,341 - You were the only one that knew. 899 00:39:44,421 --> 00:39:47,421 - I swear on my baby's life, 900 00:39:47,501 --> 00:39:49,581 I never told them anything. 901 00:39:49,661 --> 00:39:51,861 - Really, I ain't got fucking time for this. 902 00:39:51,941 --> 00:39:53,661 Get them both out of here. 903 00:39:53,701 --> 00:39:54,941 - He started it. 904 00:39:55,021 --> 00:39:56,221 He literally started-- 905 00:39:56,341 --> 00:39:58,941 He rugby tackled me when I was on TV. 906 00:39:59,021 --> 00:40:01,301 - Ashley, the show is yours. - The what? 907 00:40:01,381 --> 00:40:03,141 - You're live in ten. The show is yours. 908 00:40:03,181 --> 00:40:05,621 - The whole thing? - Do you want it? 909 00:40:05,661 --> 00:40:08,221 - No, I mean, yes. Grant, I do. 910 00:40:08,341 --> 00:40:09,781 - Yeah, it's just... - Go 911 00:40:09,861 --> 00:40:11,181 - So get up there, tell a few gags and, 912 00:40:11,301 --> 00:40:13,181 for God sake, maybe... (mumbles) 913 00:40:13,301 --> 00:40:15,181 I haven't got a sched. 914 00:40:15,301 --> 00:40:17,581 - Ladies and gentlemen, Danny and Deepak. 915 00:40:17,661 --> 00:40:20,821 - Give it up for those guys. - (applause) 916 00:40:20,901 --> 00:40:24,181 - Oh, I love those guys. - Danny! 917 00:40:24,221 --> 00:40:25,781 - [Ashley] It's just backstage jokes, guys. 918 00:40:25,861 --> 00:40:28,141 Everyone, chill the flip out. 919 00:40:28,181 --> 00:40:30,181 - What did we miss? 920 00:40:30,301 --> 00:40:34,181 - Anyway, so, does anyone want to present the show with me? 921 00:40:34,301 --> 00:40:36,061 - You, sir? - (laughs) 922 00:40:36,141 --> 00:40:38,061 - Caroline, I'm so sorry. 923 00:40:38,141 --> 00:40:39,661 I tried to stop her, but she just... 924 00:40:39,701 --> 00:40:41,661 - Melody, we spoke to Reese. 925 00:40:41,701 --> 00:40:43,301 - Abigail Reese? Is she here? 926 00:40:43,381 --> 00:40:45,461 - Don't talk, just listen. 927 00:40:45,541 --> 00:40:47,461 She told us that you gave her the information 928 00:40:47,541 --> 00:40:50,141 - about Danny's kid. - What! 929 00:40:50,181 --> 00:40:51,661 Listen, I get it. We've all made deals with journalists. 930 00:40:51,781 --> 00:40:52,861 - I would never. 931 00:40:52,941 --> 00:40:54,581 - I know this isn't what you wanted to happen. 932 00:40:54,661 --> 00:40:55,861 - I didn't tell a soul, I swear. 933 00:40:55,941 --> 00:40:57,501 - This is my fault. 934 00:40:57,581 --> 00:40:59,301 It's not like I've set you a good example. 935 00:40:59,381 --> 00:41:01,421 - Caroline, I didn't. - I take full responsibility. 936 00:41:01,501 --> 00:41:03,661 She wouldn't even have been with Danny if it wasn't for me. 937 00:41:03,701 --> 00:41:05,301 And as much as she's been stupid... 938 00:41:05,381 --> 00:41:07,061 - I believe her. 939 00:41:08,901 --> 00:41:11,501 She's as smart as anyone in this room and twice as honest. 940 00:41:11,581 --> 00:41:13,061 And if she says she didn't tell anyone, 941 00:41:13,141 --> 00:41:15,621 then I believe her. 942 00:41:15,661 --> 00:41:16,861 - Nobody else knew. 943 00:41:16,941 --> 00:41:18,021 - Robyn, stop. 944 00:41:18,101 --> 00:41:19,661 - What? 945 00:41:19,701 --> 00:41:21,141 - Stop. 946 00:41:21,181 --> 00:41:23,541 - I don't know what... - Enough! 947 00:41:27,821 --> 00:41:29,541 - You're fired. 948 00:41:29,621 --> 00:41:30,981 - Caroline, please, I swear to God, I didn't. 949 00:41:31,061 --> 00:41:33,301 - Not you. You. - What? 950 00:41:33,381 --> 00:41:35,501 - Leave. 951 00:41:37,541 --> 00:41:40,981 - Caroline, please. Please. 952 00:41:41,061 --> 00:41:43,701 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! 953 00:41:43,821 --> 00:41:47,181 Don't cry, don't lie, don't beg. 954 00:41:47,221 --> 00:41:48,501 Just go. 955 00:41:49,901 --> 00:41:52,461 - (door opens) - Caroline, your lawyers 956 00:41:52,541 --> 00:41:53,661 are here. 957 00:41:55,301 --> 00:41:56,861 Send them in. 958 00:41:56,941 --> 00:41:59,581 We're done here. 959 00:41:59,661 --> 00:42:02,941 ♪ I've been everywhere I wanna go ♪ 960 00:42:03,021 --> 00:42:07,981 ♪ Seen everything I wanna see ♪ 961 00:42:09,061 --> 00:42:12,061 ♪ But baby I am tired ♪ 962 00:42:12,141 --> 00:42:16,901 ♪ Maybe I'm just tired of me ♪ 963 00:42:21,101 --> 00:42:24,181 ♪ I'm tired of cocaine, I'm tired of pills ♪ 964 00:42:24,301 --> 00:42:26,061 (song fades) 965 00:42:37,781 --> 00:42:39,501 (car brakes screech) 966 00:42:42,661 --> 00:42:45,901 ♪ I'm tired of running, I'm tired of sin ♪ 967 00:42:48,581 --> 00:42:52,221 ♪ I'm tired of seeing the state I'm in ♪ 968 00:42:54,661 --> 00:42:57,941 ♪ I'm tired of spinning, too tired to see ♪ 969 00:43:00,781 --> 00:43:05,581 ♪ I'm tired of the demons and they're tired of me ♪ 970 00:43:10,021 --> 00:43:14,901 ♪ Baby, I'm so tired of me ♪ 971 00:43:16,661 --> 00:43:19,541 ♪ I'm so tired of me ♪ 972 00:43:22,061 --> 00:43:25,701 ♪ Baby I'm so tired of me ♪ 973 00:43:25,821 --> 00:43:28,301 (guitar playing)