1 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:09,718 ‎NETFLIX 原创剧集 2 00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:46,379 ‎(在线虚拟真人挑逗 爽完有钱收) 3 00:00:46,921 --> 00:00:47,881 ‎嘿 4 00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:50,884 ‎我开始熟悉了 5 00:00:52,260 --> 00:00:55,513 ‎真不敢相信让那些饥渴的家伙爽一下 ‎我就有钱拿 6 00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:56,473 ‎而且是虚拟的 7 00:00:56,556 --> 00:01:01,227 ‎小心了 互联网 图卡上线了 ‎感谢柏蒂的无线网密码 8 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:02,270 ‎(图卡非色情) 9 00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:07,609 ‎好的 我们开始 10 00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,235 ‎你好 我是康妮 11 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:12,363 ‎友好的虚拟“真人挑逗”在线助手 12 00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:14,949 ‎看来你是第一次交易 13 00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,910 ‎要来点不带鄙视的帮助吗? 14 00:01:16,993 --> 00:01:19,162 ‎闭嘴 电脑 别告诉我要怎么做 15 00:01:19,245 --> 00:01:23,583 ‎我这样做只是因为 ‎我拒绝再向阿姨啃老 16 00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:24,584 ‎你好 17 00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:28,296 ‎-你好 流氓山羊 想玩玩吗? ‎-当然 18 00:01:28,379 --> 00:01:29,255 ‎打飞机吧 19 00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,925 ‎太好了 第一位顾客 20 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,260 ‎飞… 21 00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:35,470 ‎飞… 22 00:01:35,553 --> 00:01:39,099 ‎磨…飞… 23 00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:41,059 ‎我的腰好痛 24 00:01:43,603 --> 00:01:46,523 ‎听起来不太好 也许你应该去看医生 25 00:01:46,606 --> 00:01:47,440 ‎好主意 26 00:01:47,565 --> 00:01:49,359 ‎呼叫大蒜医生 27 00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,611 ‎别停下 我还没到呢 28 00:01:51,694 --> 00:01:52,862 ‎飞 29 00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:54,531 ‎极度高潮 30 00:01:54,614 --> 00:01:56,282 ‎-谢谢 ‎-太棒了 31 00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:58,368 ‎(流氓山羊付你8元) 32 00:02:08,545 --> 00:02:10,839 ‎太漂亮了 33 00:02:10,922 --> 00:02:13,800 ‎甩下时慢了 这是垃圾 34 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:16,136 ‎我一定要为酵母周做好完美准备 35 00:02:16,219 --> 00:02:17,345 ‎酵母周 36 00:02:17,428 --> 00:02:20,890 ‎烘焙界中最大胆最亮眼精英的聚会 37 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:22,767 ‎我们要把甜面糕介绍给全世界 38 00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:25,270 ‎甜绵糕不是已经世界闻名了吗? 39 00:02:25,353 --> 00:02:29,566 ‎不 那是甜绵糕 ‎炸甜糕和圆海绵蛋糕的结合 40 00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,651 ‎这是甜面糕 41 00:02:33,027 --> 00:02:35,613 ‎是牛角面包和圆海绵蛋糕的结合 42 00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:37,699 ‎我明白了 43 00:02:39,450 --> 00:02:40,326 ‎嘿 44 00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:43,705 ‎太棒了 聊天洞 45 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:45,582 ‎现在不必用电话了 46 00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:48,960 ‎这比我在这栋楼弄的其他洞有用多了 47 00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:53,673 ‎我必然会写的回忆录可用书名如下 48 00:02:54,549 --> 00:02:55,550 ‎第一 49 00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:59,220 ‎“如何上升 上升 ‎再攀登 从未摔落 50 00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:01,764 ‎衣冠楚楚狗的故事” 51 00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:04,017 ‎天啊 我站在天花板上 52 00:03:06,477 --> 00:03:09,480 ‎我正在练习甜面糕单足旋转四周 53 00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:13,318 ‎糕点皮特让我在酵母周上进行展示 54 00:03:13,401 --> 00:03:14,402 ‎在公众场合 55 00:03:14,485 --> 00:03:15,987 ‎在许多观众面前 56 00:03:16,070 --> 00:03:17,906 ‎还有网上直播 57 00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:21,367 ‎是的 酵母周 58 00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:23,745 ‎记得去年我们想偷偷溜进去吗? 59 00:03:23,828 --> 00:03:26,539 ‎你以为是另一种大会 60 00:03:26,623 --> 00:03:28,166 ‎对 你犯罪那次 61 00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:31,002 ‎我需要永久性借走以下物品 62 00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:34,339 ‎大蒜…洗碗剂 ‎大蒜 还有装大蒜的袋子 63 00:03:34,422 --> 00:03:39,010 ‎图卡 你又在按照 ‎大蒜医生书上的内容自己制药吗? 64 00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:41,095 ‎太过分了 65 00:03:41,179 --> 00:03:44,015 ‎这项指控太过分了 66 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,561 ‎只是轻微痉挛 你看 67 00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:49,938 ‎看上去很严重 68 00:03:50,021 --> 00:03:51,773 ‎也许你应该去看医生 69 00:03:51,856 --> 00:03:52,690 ‎我来看看 70 00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:57,904 ‎对 和平时一样 柏蒂说得对 71 00:03:57,987 --> 00:04:00,740 ‎这太恶心了 我走了 72 00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:07,163 ‎天啊 73 00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:13,378 ‎图卡 我担心你 74 00:04:13,461 --> 00:04:16,422 ‎-我知道你害怕医生… ‎-除了大蒜做的医生外我都怕 75 00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:18,716 ‎但我今天能带你去看医生 76 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,135 ‎-真的医生 ‎-没必要 77 00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:22,637 ‎请你考虑一下 78 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:24,555 ‎因为酵母周 我这周末会很忙 79 00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:25,473 ‎酵母周 80 00:04:25,556 --> 00:04:26,766 ‎但今天下午我有空 81 00:04:26,849 --> 00:04:29,352 ‎我不需要什么政府批准的 ‎粗暴手术和赶快出院程序 82 00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:32,397 ‎我不需要西药和大多数东方药 83 00:04:33,564 --> 00:04:35,483 ‎瞧?解决了 84 00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,529 ‎(酵母周前18小时) 85 00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:42,031 ‎柏蒂…大蒜让我舒服些了 86 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,449 ‎就像大蒜面包更好吃一样 87 00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:45,451 ‎太好了 图卡 88 00:04:47,161 --> 00:04:48,204 ‎(酵母周前13小时) 89 00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:51,749 ‎柏蒂…28公克是多少勺? 90 00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:54,919 ‎算了 我喝整瓶得了 91 00:04:58,172 --> 00:04:59,007 ‎拜托 92 00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:01,759 ‎柏蒂 医生说的一打创可贴是多少? 93 00:05:02,468 --> 00:05:05,054 ‎柏蒂 我能挤出柠檬汁 ‎滴在伤口上吗? 94 00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:08,349 ‎柏蒂 你有能装满浴缸的芥末吗? 95 00:05:09,892 --> 00:05:11,060 ‎(酵母周前10小时) 96 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:13,438 ‎柏蒂… 97 00:05:13,521 --> 00:05:15,273 ‎-什么事? ‎-我爱你 98 00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:19,777 ‎什么?这怎么能… 99 00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:22,113 ‎汩汩… 100 00:05:22,530 --> 00:05:23,364 ‎我感觉很好 101 00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:24,574 ‎我的药起作用了 102 00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:27,452 ‎是时候来打虚拟飞机了 103 00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:29,287 ‎我应该去创作贺卡 104 00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:30,705 ‎好了… 105 00:05:30,788 --> 00:05:33,916 ‎我来了 男生去哪里了? 106 00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:36,669 ‎你害羞吗?你这个可爱的小变态 107 00:05:36,753 --> 00:05:38,713 ‎没有 有点吧 108 00:05:38,796 --> 00:05:39,839 ‎我很孤单 109 00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:44,010 ‎我的初恋女友抛弃我了 我想找人陪 110 00:05:44,093 --> 00:05:45,219 ‎你看起来人不错 111 00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:46,346 ‎(多毛种马69请求加好友) 112 00:05:46,429 --> 00:05:47,263 ‎名字真不错 113 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:51,142 ‎这不是我的第一选择 ‎但已经有人叫多毛种马68了 114 00:05:51,225 --> 00:05:53,978 ‎很好 我们去下流宾馆吧 115 00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,397 ‎这样我可以摩擦你的那根棍儿 116 00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,901 ‎我们要抱抱吗?看起来不错 117 00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:03,112 ‎你要我做被抱的小勺子吗? 118 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,490 ‎好的 我就不客气了 119 00:06:05,656 --> 00:06:08,409 ‎我不是大汤勺 我是小茶匙 120 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:09,827 ‎这是抱抱笑话 121 00:06:10,828 --> 00:06:12,288 ‎喂?你还好吗? 122 00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:14,957 ‎-柏蒂… ‎-图卡 是你吗? 123 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,710 ‎斯贝克 快过来 通过洞她会听到的 124 00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:18,961 ‎出什么事了? 125 00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:22,006 ‎我快疯了 她一整天都是这样 126 00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:22,924 ‎她… 127 00:06:23,591 --> 00:06:25,760 ‎太黏人了 128 00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:28,388 ‎见鬼 通风孔 ‎你为什么非得让我听到? 129 00:06:28,471 --> 00:06:30,181 ‎我快速问一下她 130 00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:33,643 ‎图卡 你还好吗? 131 00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:35,645 ‎还好 我只想说… 132 00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:37,730 ‎晚安 133 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,858 ‎晚安 图卡 134 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,822 ‎你在吗?有人吗… 135 00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:47,240 ‎救命 136 00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:49,075 ‎在吗? 137 00:06:49,575 --> 00:06:52,286 ‎你的虚拟性交易需要帮助吗? 138 00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:53,204 ‎在吗? 139 00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:03,756 ‎我终于来到了酵母周 140 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,676 ‎好像全世界就在我的鸟嘴尖 141 00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:10,888 ‎真像一场梦 而我却醒着 142 00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,933 ‎在这个烘焙精英聚集的地方 143 00:07:14,016 --> 00:07:17,603 ‎柏蒂 别这样 ‎只有第一次来的才会在喷泉旁唱歌 144 00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:23,359 ‎-太美妙了 我这一周如此甜美 ‎-我要和我老公离婚 145 00:07:28,906 --> 00:07:29,740 ‎你好 146 00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:31,451 ‎-你活着吗? ‎-什么? 147 00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:34,078 ‎你好 我是多毛种马69 148 00:07:34,162 --> 00:07:35,705 ‎记得吗?我是小勺子 149 00:07:35,788 --> 00:07:37,582 ‎-你向我求救 ‎-我有吗? 150 00:07:37,665 --> 00:07:38,958 ‎然后你喊出了你的地址 151 00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:41,419 ‎还点了个披萨 要求很复杂 152 00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:44,088 ‎-你真的过来救我了? ‎-是的 153 00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,090 ‎只是七小时车程而已 154 00:07:46,174 --> 00:07:48,426 ‎第一小时我想:“感觉是对的事” 155 00:07:48,509 --> 00:07:50,261 ‎第二小时我纳闷:“这奇怪吗?” 156 00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:53,181 ‎第三小时 ‎我想:“对 这绝对很奇怪” 157 00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:56,225 ‎第四小时 我想: ‎“一个陌生人在这残酷冷漠的世界 158 00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:59,061 ‎表现出友好 也许这是好事” 159 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,022 ‎第五小时 我停下加油 吃点心 160 00:08:01,105 --> 00:08:05,359 ‎现在我来了 七小时后依然不确定 161 00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:08,279 ‎真高兴知道这世上还有人关心我… 162 00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:13,075 ‎也许我们应该去医院 对吗? 163 00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:22,126 ‎欢迎来到酵母周的神经中枢 164 00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:26,297 ‎全世界最有名的大厨都来了 165 00:08:26,380 --> 00:08:27,840 ‎那是斯蒂尔劳伦大厨 166 00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:30,843 ‎第一个在饼干上加盐的糕点大厨 167 00:08:30,927 --> 00:08:32,553 ‎那是温特加西亚大厨 168 00:08:32,637 --> 00:08:35,473 ‎第一个把腌黄瓜塞进点心的大厨 169 00:08:35,848 --> 00:08:40,144 ‎如果你看仔细一点 ‎会发现她作品中的性暗示 170 00:08:41,479 --> 00:08:43,856 ‎那是但丁法拉利大厨 171 00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:47,360 ‎他是第一个食谱全偷自祖母的大厨 172 00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:48,945 ‎那是他的祖母 173 00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:51,656 ‎但丁 过来亲亲你的祖母 174 00:08:51,739 --> 00:08:54,492 ‎快来 但丁 我要亲亲 175 00:08:54,575 --> 00:08:56,160 ‎快来亲亲我 176 00:08:57,161 --> 00:09:00,331 ‎我认识这些人 但我喜欢精彩的简介 177 00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:03,000 ‎那是我想的那样吗? 178 00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:08,256 ‎柏蒂 我真希望 ‎通过你那甜美天真的双眼看世界 179 00:09:08,339 --> 00:09:09,715 ‎(后台门) 180 00:09:09,799 --> 00:09:10,758 ‎大礼堂 181 00:09:10,841 --> 00:09:13,594 ‎这地方以严禁用闪光灯拍照而闻名 182 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,472 ‎我以为关掉闪光灯了… 183 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:19,308 ‎鸟先生和鸟女士 还有植物 人类 184 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,769 ‎偶尔还有能说话的无生命体 185 00:09:21,852 --> 00:09:22,979 ‎真是一个奇怪的世界 186 00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:26,399 ‎请欣赏甜甜圈跳油 187 00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:32,280 ‎(飞溅区) 188 00:09:37,451 --> 00:09:39,829 ‎请看 太棒了 189 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:45,001 ‎在这里我们将向全世界介绍 ‎我最新的甜面糕 190 00:09:46,502 --> 00:09:49,922 ‎柏蒂 你要做的 就是比这个人优秀 191 00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:02,435 ‎图卡?在吗? 192 00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:05,062 ‎柏蒂让我来看看你 所以… 193 00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:06,397 ‎那是我的杯子 194 00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:08,065 ‎(我真的喜欢周一) 195 00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:09,567 ‎这是我的笔记本电脑 196 00:10:12,778 --> 00:10:15,615 ‎好玩 好像是开放式电子游戏 197 00:10:16,324 --> 00:10:19,285 ‎过来给我吹箫 你这只下流的鸟 198 00:10:19,368 --> 00:10:20,578 ‎肯定是什么反派 199 00:10:20,661 --> 00:10:23,664 ‎-飞 ‎-这是我出拳的效果吗? 200 00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:26,042 ‎飞… 201 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,835 ‎没错 电脑 他是个阿飞 202 00:10:27,918 --> 00:10:29,462 ‎-天啊 ‎-接招 203 00:10:29,545 --> 00:10:32,048 ‎飞… 204 00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:33,341 ‎(现在按Q 成功) 205 00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:34,717 ‎飞倒 206 00:10:35,092 --> 00:10:36,385 ‎太棒了 207 00:10:40,389 --> 00:10:43,142 ‎(医院) 208 00:10:43,601 --> 00:10:46,479 ‎打扰一下 我正在等我害怕的朋友 209 00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:50,566 ‎你这里有以太网线 ‎让我开个局域网派对吗? 210 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:54,820 ‎稍等 先生 我看看能找到什么 211 00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:07,416 ‎你好 我是谢尔曼医生 ‎我来给你做检查 212 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,502 ‎你要把我切开 把我的肛门 213 00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:11,003 ‎缝在另一个人的肛门上吗? 214 00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:13,339 ‎告诉我…女人 215 00:11:15,132 --> 00:11:16,884 ‎你很紧张 216 00:11:17,593 --> 00:11:20,554 ‎你好 我是超声山姆 超声波机器 217 00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:22,306 ‎我被植入了安抚你的程序 218 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:25,184 ‎我们尝试过教医生同理心 但是没用 219 00:11:25,267 --> 00:11:27,561 ‎别担心 一切都会好起来的 220 00:11:27,645 --> 00:11:30,523 ‎柏蒂就会这样说 ‎她生来就是安抚我的 221 00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:31,774 ‎至少以前是这样 222 00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:34,151 ‎现在她只会说什么爱尔兰黄油 223 00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:37,321 ‎“发酵奶油能提升风味 图卡” 224 00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:41,200 ‎好消息 医生已经快检查完你的内脏 225 00:11:41,283 --> 00:11:42,410 ‎没什么可担心的 226 00:11:42,493 --> 00:11:44,829 ‎她需要和其他同事商量一下… 227 00:11:44,912 --> 00:11:47,373 ‎好了 废话少说 ‎我需要你帮我老婆插上电源 228 00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:48,916 ‎她就在那边 229 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:52,002 ‎-她是落地台灯? ‎-她远远不止是台灯 230 00:11:52,086 --> 00:11:54,880 ‎你眼前的她没在最美的光线下 231 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:58,300 ‎这个梗一定会让她大笑的 232 00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:00,386 ‎珍惜你所爱的 图卡 233 00:12:00,469 --> 00:12:03,514 ‎你永远不知道 ‎他们何时也许就会离开你的生活 234 00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:04,765 ‎求你了 给她插上插头… 235 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,058 ‎见鬼 她回来了 236 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:08,102 ‎见鬼…冷静… 237 00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:11,772 ‎所以如果那处奇怪的凸起是癌症… 238 00:12:11,856 --> 00:12:16,318 ‎有时候生活给了你瘤子 ‎你可以做成沙朗瘤排… 239 00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:18,320 ‎好了 需要去照X光 240 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:19,655 ‎你要做个勇敢的大姑娘? 241 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:22,032 ‎还是说你需要机器人? 242 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:30,166 ‎大家都熟悉 ‎我美味无敌大奖的得奖发明 243 00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:34,211 ‎炸甜糕和圆海绵蛋糕的美妙结合 ‎甜绵糕 244 00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:36,839 ‎今天 我为大家带来了新作品 245 00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,340 ‎甜面糕 246 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,885 ‎牛角面包 圆海绵蛋糕 247 00:12:40,968 --> 00:12:43,345 ‎从历史上来说 它们是天敌 248 00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:45,806 ‎有人问为什么让二者结合? 249 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:48,225 ‎我问 为什么不行? 250 00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:50,144 ‎因为这样很危险 251 00:12:50,227 --> 00:12:53,397 ‎我已经完善了制作过程 ‎从科学的利益出发 252 00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:56,776 ‎我将会把我的技法慷慨地分享给大家 253 00:12:56,859 --> 00:13:02,156 ‎展示这一技法的是我可爱的助手 ‎欧歌鸫罗柏塔 254 00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:08,287 ‎大家好 255 00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:11,165 ‎但首先 展示我可爱食材的 256 00:13:11,248 --> 00:13:14,126 ‎是我更可爱的无人机 257 00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:23,093 ‎完美的鸡蛋是至关重要的 258 00:13:23,177 --> 00:13:26,722 ‎蛋黄和蛋白必须是阴和阳 259 00:13:26,806 --> 00:13:28,891 ‎狂热的对称… 260 00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:31,352 ‎好了 柏蒂 你不紧张 261 00:13:31,435 --> 00:13:32,812 ‎你不紧张 262 00:13:34,021 --> 00:13:36,232 ‎手 你们为什么要背叛我? 263 00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:38,943 ‎我用乳液养护你们这么久 264 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:42,530 ‎以下技法 很多人尝试过却失败了 265 00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:44,281 ‎我参加过他们的葬礼 266 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:46,700 ‎闭棺葬礼 每个人都是这样 267 00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:49,662 ‎甜面糕单足旋转四周 268 00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:04,718 ‎(甜面糕) 269 00:14:12,726 --> 00:14:14,061 ‎好了 270 00:14:14,186 --> 00:14:17,898 ‎我尽量说得委婉一些 ‎你的子宫里有个蛋 271 00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:21,235 ‎你不把它切出来 你就是个白痴 272 00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:23,946 ‎好吧 多谢你告诉我 273 00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:26,782 ‎我将拒绝接受手术 274 00:14:27,449 --> 00:14:28,284 ‎听着 女士 275 00:14:28,367 --> 00:14:30,703 ‎蛋深埋在你的卵巢里 276 00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:34,456 ‎如果不切除 它会破裂 你会死 277 00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:37,251 ‎但是别担心 这里的医生是最好的 278 00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:44,133 ‎你妈就是这样 不系安全带 279 00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:46,719 ‎阿姨 我妈妈会没事吗? 280 00:14:46,802 --> 00:14:50,931 ‎别担心 亲爱的 ‎这里的医生是最好的 281 00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:01,442 ‎敬甜面糕 282 00:15:01,525 --> 00:15:04,695 ‎愿它成为最新的美食时尚 ‎所有人爱它 283 00:15:04,778 --> 00:15:07,156 ‎爱到开始厌恶它 因为它象征了 284 00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:09,199 ‎脑满肠肥者的轻浮 285 00:15:09,283 --> 00:15:10,618 ‎干杯 286 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,411 ‎干杯 287 00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:15,331 ‎太激动了 288 00:15:15,414 --> 00:15:18,667 ‎现在我要回酒店 拿上冰桶 289 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,170 ‎我考虑邀请某人 290 00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:24,256 ‎参加只限大厨的晚宴 291 00:15:25,966 --> 00:15:28,552 ‎面包碗 我听说过 292 00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:30,971 ‎欢迎 您的座位准备好了 293 00:15:33,515 --> 00:15:35,893 ‎全世界的烘焙精英吃着最精美的食物 294 00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:38,896 ‎谈论点心 抱怨没用的烘焙师 295 00:15:38,979 --> 00:15:42,024 ‎然后 最后一滴红酒喝完后 296 00:15:42,232 --> 00:15:44,026 ‎他们会吃桌子 297 00:15:44,193 --> 00:15:47,488 ‎是 对我已知事情的完美总结 298 00:15:47,571 --> 00:15:48,989 ‎你打算邀请谁? 299 00:15:49,073 --> 00:15:52,993 ‎你啊 柔弱的小傻瓜 就是你 300 00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:56,372 ‎我的天啊 真的是面包碗 301 00:15:56,455 --> 00:15:58,457 ‎你是认真的吗? 302 00:15:58,540 --> 00:16:00,960 ‎是 我相当认真 303 00:16:05,172 --> 00:16:06,548 ‎(斯贝克 接听 拒绝) 304 00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:09,259 ‎那么 你来吗? 305 00:16:13,222 --> 00:16:14,515 ‎稍等 306 00:16:14,682 --> 00:16:18,435 ‎斯贝克 我的展示相当成功 ‎所有人都说… 307 00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:20,396 ‎柏蒂 图卡进医院了 308 00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:22,690 ‎慢着 出什么事了?你陪着她吗? 309 00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:24,400 ‎不 没有 310 00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:25,651 ‎那你怎么知道的? 311 00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:29,488 ‎(两分钟前) 312 00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:33,117 ‎兄弟们 看我晃悠我的东西 313 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:36,787 ‎图卡 你还在医院吗?我在等待室 314 00:16:36,870 --> 00:16:37,705 ‎什么? 315 00:16:39,707 --> 00:16:41,583 ‎-别人说的 ‎-我的天 316 00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:42,710 ‎她还好吗? 317 00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:44,378 ‎我不知道 她快做手术了 318 00:16:44,461 --> 00:16:45,504 ‎你要马上来 319 00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:54,763 ‎糕点皮特 非常感谢你 ‎但我家里有急事 320 00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:55,723 ‎我得走了 321 00:16:55,806 --> 00:16:58,934 ‎机会只有一次 但做你必须做的事 322 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,477 ‎你是成年鸟女性 323 00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:04,857 ‎我不能强迫你 ‎为你的事业做出正确的决定 324 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:20,164 ‎我觉得自己像是被剥了壳的虾 325 00:17:20,247 --> 00:17:23,250 ‎感觉我吃了一辆怪物卡车 326 00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:27,004 ‎一块接一块 现在我完蛋了 327 00:17:29,631 --> 00:17:32,634 ‎我开车穿过毒垃圾 328 00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:35,596 ‎在我身体里它卡住了 329 00:17:35,679 --> 00:17:39,558 ‎我弄得一团糟 现在倒霉了 330 00:17:42,352 --> 00:17:48,942 ‎我无法忍受失去控制的感觉 ‎我觉得好害怕 好无助 331 00:17:49,026 --> 00:17:54,740 ‎没有朋友 面对恐惧太痛苦 332 00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:58,410 ‎等等 不要开始 333 00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:00,954 ‎我还没准备好 334 00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:05,542 ‎这是终点吗? 335 00:18:12,966 --> 00:18:15,511 ‎但我们从高中起就开始约会了 336 00:18:15,594 --> 00:18:17,888 ‎我只希望知道自己哪里做错了 337 00:18:18,388 --> 00:18:20,891 ‎通常 我不会这样说一个女人 338 00:18:20,974 --> 00:18:25,646 ‎但你前女友听起来是个刻薄鬼 339 00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:29,483 ‎也许你不是分手 而是成长 340 00:18:31,985 --> 00:18:33,529 ‎我尽快赶来了 341 00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:35,197 ‎出什么事了?我能见她吗? 342 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:36,365 ‎她还在做手术 343 00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:38,700 ‎医生说我们只能等 344 00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:47,167 ‎我跟她说了不能再喝了 ‎我跟她说了喝得太多了 345 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:48,836 ‎我们得给她洗胃 346 00:18:48,919 --> 00:18:51,755 ‎-我能做什么? ‎-你只能等 347 00:18:51,839 --> 00:18:53,257 ‎(鸟镇大学) 348 00:19:16,864 --> 00:19:19,950 ‎图卡 我真高兴你没事 349 00:19:20,033 --> 00:19:22,953 ‎什么?我一直都没事 350 00:19:23,036 --> 00:19:26,206 ‎我没事 我是图卡 351 00:19:34,631 --> 00:19:35,924 ‎我会想你的 斯贝克 352 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:38,635 ‎我也会想你的 多毛种马69 353 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,721 ‎你可以叫我乔尔 354 00:19:42,222 --> 00:19:43,098 ‎不 355 00:19:44,391 --> 00:19:45,851 ‎我永远不会这样叫 356 00:19:46,852 --> 00:19:49,021 ‎我爱你 宝贝 我们快离开这 357 00:19:54,735 --> 00:19:57,154 ‎到了 来吧 你没事了 358 00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:22,137 ‎-柏蒂 你在做卫生吗? ‎-对 稍微打扫一下 359 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:24,514 ‎-你不必这样做 ‎-没事 360 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:26,475 ‎如果我不打扫 谁来呢? 361 00:20:26,808 --> 00:20:29,686 ‎-你在生我气? ‎-没有 362 00:20:29,770 --> 00:20:31,980 ‎只是…看这个地方 363 00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:34,399 ‎没有我 你就是这样生活吗? 364 00:20:34,483 --> 00:20:36,610 ‎我知道怎么回事了 365 00:20:36,693 --> 00:20:38,487 ‎你觉得我无法照顾自己 366 00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:40,822 ‎-什么? ‎-我知道你觉得我黏人 367 00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:44,910 ‎没错 我从对话通风孔全听到了 368 00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:48,080 ‎图卡 你希望我说什么?你就是黏人 369 00:20:48,163 --> 00:20:49,206 ‎你总是需要我 370 00:20:49,289 --> 00:20:51,875 ‎你永远是有趣 无忧无虑的派对狂 371 00:20:51,959 --> 00:20:53,585 ‎但我必须做杞人忧天的那个 372 00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:55,462 ‎但你不在我身边时 你猜怎样? 373 00:20:55,545 --> 00:20:57,965 ‎我风趣 我勇敢 374 00:20:58,048 --> 00:21:01,176 ‎-你在说什么? ‎-我完美地展示了甜面糕的制作 375 00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:02,761 ‎所有人都喜爱我 376 00:21:02,844 --> 00:21:04,680 ‎糕点皮特邀请我参加大厨专享晚宴 377 00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:07,057 ‎而且他冲我眨眼 378 00:21:07,140 --> 00:21:10,352 ‎你听到自己在说什么吗? ‎柏蒂 你有男友 379 00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:12,437 ‎你想做什么? 380 00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:13,814 ‎你到底是什么人? 381 00:21:13,897 --> 00:21:17,276 ‎为什么糕点皮特的新糕点 ‎和原来的糕点一个名字? 382 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,111 ‎他为什么不取名叫糕包甜? 383 00:21:19,194 --> 00:21:20,737 ‎我没求你来这里 384 00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:22,406 ‎我可以照顾好自己 385 00:21:22,489 --> 00:21:24,783 ‎我有一个认识的怪人送我去医院 386 00:21:24,866 --> 00:21:27,744 ‎我几次主动提出送你去医院 387 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:29,746 ‎以前在大学时 你也是不听我的 388 00:21:29,830 --> 00:21:31,540 ‎最终被送到急诊室 389 00:21:31,623 --> 00:21:34,251 ‎那不同 我现在不喝酒了 390 00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:36,795 ‎图卡 你刚做完手术 391 00:21:36,878 --> 00:21:38,755 ‎我还是让你休息吧 392 00:21:41,049 --> 00:21:45,220 ‎但我只多说一件事 393 00:21:45,554 --> 00:21:48,223 ‎别忘了那次你自己剪的短裤 394 00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:50,350 ‎完全毁了我的暑假 395 00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:52,978 ‎要算旧账吗?因为我也有事可以提 396 00:21:53,061 --> 00:21:55,314 ‎你害我们被赶出阿妮塔的婚礼 397 00:21:55,397 --> 00:21:57,774 ‎因为你坚持自助餐是任你吃形式 398 00:21:57,858 --> 00:21:59,318 ‎图卡 那是你 399 00:21:59,401 --> 00:22:01,028 ‎是 是我 400 00:22:01,486 --> 00:22:04,698 ‎这是我的润唇膏 这是我买的 401 00:22:04,781 --> 00:22:06,408 ‎谁会买润唇膏? 402 00:22:06,491 --> 00:22:09,786 ‎你觉得润唇膏是哪里来的? ‎它不会突然变出来 403 00:22:09,870 --> 00:22:11,330 ‎那只怪你看得不够仔细 404 00:22:11,747 --> 00:22:13,915 ‎斯宾塞根本配不上你 405 00:22:13,999 --> 00:22:16,418 ‎他只是愚蠢的兄弟会鹈鹕 406 00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:18,045 ‎多谢你这样说 407 00:22:18,378 --> 00:22:20,297 ‎你永远不会开心谈恋爱 408 00:22:20,380 --> 00:22:22,382 ‎因为没人配得上你 409 00:22:22,466 --> 00:22:24,259 ‎你为什么这样说? 410 00:22:24,468 --> 00:22:27,179 ‎你为什么觉得你比我强? ‎我帮你升职了 411 00:22:27,262 --> 00:22:31,183 ‎没有我 你根本无法走出家门 ‎因为你是个胆小鬼 412 00:22:31,266 --> 00:22:33,894 ‎我总是放下一切去帮你 413 00:22:33,977 --> 00:22:37,022 ‎我祈祷有一天你无法放下一切来帮我 414 00:22:37,105 --> 00:22:39,816 ‎因为你真的有一份工作 415 00:22:41,985 --> 00:22:44,196 ‎看你让我变得多刻薄 416 00:22:45,864 --> 00:22:47,157 ‎现在怎么办? 417 00:22:47,574 --> 00:22:49,701 ‎我不知道 这一切太难受了 418 00:22:49,785 --> 00:22:52,079 ‎以前事情有趣多了 419 00:22:52,162 --> 00:22:55,499 ‎但现在 我们的友谊感觉需要好多… 420 00:22:55,665 --> 00:22:56,625 ‎努力 421 00:22:56,708 --> 00:22:59,002 ‎这是你对我的看法? ‎要努力才能跟我做朋友吗 422 00:22:59,086 --> 00:23:00,545 ‎不 只是… 423 00:23:00,921 --> 00:23:02,964 ‎也许我们只是渐行渐远 424 00:23:03,548 --> 00:23:06,009 ‎也许我们需要分开一段时间 425 00:24:44,858 --> 00:24:47,027 ‎是我 但丁大厨… 426 00:24:47,110 --> 00:24:50,822 ‎只是普通男人 我准备好乐一下了 427 00:24:51,198 --> 00:24:52,741 ‎你是谁? 428 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:55,744 ‎是你吗?我的但丁大厨? 429 00:24:55,827 --> 00:24:57,078 ‎我亲爱的宝贝 430 00:24:57,162 --> 00:24:59,414 ‎过来给祖母一点亲亲 431 00:24:59,498 --> 00:25:01,082 ‎给我亲亲 我要你亲我 432 00:25:01,166 --> 00:25:03,668 ‎我要亲亲 我一定要你亲亲 433 00:25:03,752 --> 00:25:06,880 ‎我喜爱那些亲亲 亲我… 434 00:25:06,963 --> 00:25:07,964 ‎亲亲 435 00:25:08,048 --> 00:25:11,927 ‎字幕翻译:陈天