1 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:09,718 ‎NETFLIX 原創影集 2 00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:48,631 ‎我身為康泰鳥巢公司的資料處理人員 ‎已經有三年了 3 00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:50,425 ‎我是整個流程中很重要的一環 4 00:00:50,508 --> 00:00:53,970 ‎但有時我不禁好奇 ‎若是成為更重要的一環會如何? 5 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:56,681 ‎我已經準備好要出人頭地了 6 00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:59,059 ‎我要升遷 7 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:02,228 ‎我是問妳早餐要吃什麼? 8 00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:03,146 ‎抱歉 9 00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:06,941 ‎我們有穀片、蛋、魚或是蛋糕 ‎何必選呢? 10 00:01:12,322 --> 00:01:16,534 ‎我公司裡有個職位剛缺人 ‎我是最適合做這份工作的人 11 00:01:17,202 --> 00:01:21,873 ‎-什麼職位? ‎-資深營運分析師 12 00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:28,421 ‎運用統計數據來優化 ‎長期發展的行銷策略 13 00:01:31,883 --> 00:01:33,510 ‎天啊 14 00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:36,012 ‎太好了 ‎妳今天會跟妳老闆提這件事嗎? 15 00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:39,599 ‎我相當確定我是最具資格的人 16 00:01:39,682 --> 00:01:42,936 ‎所以妳寄望妳老闆記得妳的存在 ‎知道妳的內心想法 17 00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:44,187 ‎然後如妳所願? 18 00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:46,856 ‎到目前為止 ‎我都以那種方式過人生,進行得… 19 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:48,274 ‎很不順利 20 00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:49,984 ‎妳應該開口要求,柏蒂 21 00:01:50,068 --> 00:01:52,904 ‎開口要求我要的東西不是我的風格 22 00:01:52,987 --> 00:01:55,698 ‎不過沒關係,我有個計劃 23 00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:59,202 ‎首先,我以穿著贏得好印象 24 00:02:00,161 --> 00:02:02,288 ‎妳沒有那套衣服,但衣服很時尚 25 00:02:02,372 --> 00:02:07,627 ‎然後透過風趣的閒聊和老闆打好關係 26 00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:12,423 ‎雖然工作很棒 ‎但你不會很想去海灘玩一天嗎? 27 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:16,469 ‎-大家都喜歡海灘 ‎-我工作有多拚,在海灘就有多狂 28 00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:18,471 ‎說得好 29 00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:23,101 ‎接著在會議中發言 ‎以展現我的領導能力 30 00:02:23,518 --> 00:02:26,187 ‎我是德克 ‎柏蒂既愚蠢又惹人厭的同事 31 00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:29,149 ‎我噴太多古龍水 ‎總是說“有其”而不是“尤其” 32 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:32,694 ‎我通常說話都比各位大聲 ‎我剛發現自己是個愚蠢的混蛋 33 00:02:33,278 --> 00:02:35,822 ‎現在我要滾了 34 00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:37,448 ‎謝了,德克 35 00:02:37,532 --> 00:02:39,534 ‎我做了市場調查,請看 36 00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:42,579 ‎如果我們增加媒體廣告支出 37 00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:45,206 ‎我們的收益就會增加25% 38 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:46,124 ‎充滿自信 39 00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:50,587 ‎柏蒂,妳願意接受 ‎資深營運分析師的職務嗎? 40 00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:51,921 ‎誰?我? 41 00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:55,091 ‎-拜託,柏蒂,求求妳 ‎-好吧 42 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,551 ‎柏蒂萬歲 43 00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:59,220 ‎這是妳的楓糖核桃拿鐵,柏蒂女士 44 00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:01,431 ‎-真美味 ‎-這是最新的分析資訊,柏蒂女士 45 00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:06,186 ‎早安,柏蒂女士,我餓了 ‎妳能餵我一些新檔案嗎? 46 00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,147 ‎-好吧 ‎-真好吃 47 00:03:09,230 --> 00:03:11,524 ‎再餵我多一點檔案 48 00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:16,654 ‎我一開始吃就會餓,永遠不會滿足 49 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:18,740 ‎那是我的詛咒 50 00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:21,784 ‎-柏蒂 ‎-今天會進行得很順利的 51 00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:23,369 ‎有好消息就傳訊給我,好嗎? 52 00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:26,664 ‎也許今晚我們可以慶祝一下 53 00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:31,127 ‎以我大鳥頭想出來的方法 54 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,087 ‎兩種不同的烤薯條 55 00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:36,132 ‎要不要我過去幫妳取得升遷的機會? 56 00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:38,885 ‎那會很有趣,圖卡 57 00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:41,179 ‎但我應該自己處理才對 58 00:03:41,763 --> 00:03:46,267 ‎好吧,但我已經準備好展現圖卡魔法 ‎並對世界有所貢獻 59 00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:49,687 ‎何不用雜務鵝應用程式 ‎找副業來做? 60 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:54,400 ‎好主意,我可以竭盡所能幫助陌生人 ‎同時還能賺錢 61 00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:57,820 ‎沒錯,我今天會完成不少工作 62 00:03:57,904 --> 00:04:00,156 ‎陌生人們,準備接受圖卡的魔法 63 00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:03,952 ‎(康泰鳥巢) 64 00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:07,538 ‎老闆…老闆在哪裡? 65 00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:12,085 ‎妳好,克勞黛,嚇我一跳 ‎妳光是出現就嚇人 66 00:04:12,877 --> 00:04:15,046 ‎(辦公室經理) 67 00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:18,341 ‎好,快展現魅力 68 00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,885 ‎與老闆閒聊的行動開始 69 00:04:22,553 --> 00:04:26,307 ‎-你好,何藍 ‎-早安,柏蒂 70 00:04:26,391 --> 00:04:29,727 ‎週末的天氣真是好得不得了,對吧? 71 00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:32,605 ‎讓人很想去海灘 72 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:33,898 ‎妳去海灘了嗎? 73 00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:37,443 ‎沒有,我是想去 74 00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:40,446 ‎不過車程很遠,而且我怕螃蟹 75 00:04:42,031 --> 00:04:43,658 ‎你們在聊海灘? 76 00:04:43,741 --> 00:04:45,910 ‎你要去衝浪嗎?何藍老兄 77 00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:48,329 ‎-你說對了,德克 ‎-太好了 78 00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:51,374 ‎水上運動 79 00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:55,378 ‎有時我會做關於海洋的噩夢 80 00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:58,548 ‎海洋如此之深,水的顏色變得超級黑 81 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:02,635 ‎萬一那裡有超大型螃蟹怪物 ‎等著掐我的屁股呢? 82 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,098 ‎我工作多拚,在海灘就多狂 83 00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:08,808 ‎算了 84 00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:14,981 ‎-週末看了運動比賽嗎? ‎-當然看了,非常好的運動比賽 85 00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,235 ‎(替體面狗聽打,鳥城鳥群東路) 86 00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,905 ‎你好,樓上鄰居,我來當你的雜務鵝 87 00:05:23,531 --> 00:05:26,534 ‎太好了,可以為我聽打嗎?親愛的 88 00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:27,452 ‎可以,先生 89 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,123 ‎“親愛的《鳥城報》編輯 90 00:05:32,206 --> 00:05:34,459 ‎由於預期增加的行車安全問題 91 00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:39,547 ‎鳥喙街上的黑色柏油坑洞 ‎無法被等閒視之” 92 00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:47,597 ‎妳都打好了? 93 00:05:48,890 --> 00:05:51,601 ‎“身為老舊旅行自行車的主人 94 00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:57,148 ‎我陷入險境,坦白說 ‎市政府輕率的鋪路工程令我很憂慮” 95 00:05:57,231 --> 00:05:58,483 ‎打好了 96 00:05:58,566 --> 00:06:02,528 ‎“誠如知名的都市計劃專家 ‎艾伯特衛斯薩曾經說過 97 00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:06,032 ‎‘道路是城市的淋巴系統’ 98 00:06:06,115 --> 00:06:11,788 ‎因此我奉勸盡速 ‎修理鳥城真實存在的裂縫 99 00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:16,209 ‎狂熱的自行車公民,體面狗上” 100 00:06:16,292 --> 00:06:17,335 ‎好,讀給我聽 101 00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:22,006 ‎“親愛的報紙,坑洞很糟 102 00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:23,591 ‎去湖裡手淫吧 103 00:06:23,674 --> 00:06:27,345 ‎城市迅猛龍,體面狗上” 104 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,723 ‎什麼?眼前這是什麼欺騙行為? 105 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:31,766 ‎可以寄出去了 106 00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:34,227 ‎妳肯定在開玩笑 107 00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:36,437 ‎剛出爐的新郵件 108 00:06:37,438 --> 00:06:38,648 ‎-收到 ‎-不行 109 00:06:38,981 --> 00:06:42,193 ‎這是詐欺 ‎那不是我所構思的完美無瑕文字 110 00:06:42,276 --> 00:06:44,112 ‎我認為我的版本比較單刀直入 111 00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:46,656 ‎我的最好朋友柏蒂 ‎總是喜歡我的編輯能力 112 00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:49,659 ‎-立刻出去 ‎-好吧 113 00:06:50,201 --> 00:06:52,620 ‎我下個工作在哪裡? 114 00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:02,713 ‎-妳在看什麼? ‎-一些想法 115 00:07:02,797 --> 00:07:05,716 ‎我想我們應該針對老鷹做行銷… 116 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,135 ‎很酷… 117 00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:10,012 ‎我也有一些很酷的主意 ‎是我想出的主意 118 00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:11,639 ‎(德克的酷主意) 119 00:07:11,722 --> 00:07:12,557 ‎大家早安 120 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:15,476 ‎我們開始討論下個月的行銷策略吧 121 00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:18,521 ‎-有人想先發言嗎? ‎-有,我有一些想法 122 00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:21,649 ‎如果我們檢視上一季的資訊 ‎其中顯示… 123 00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:23,860 ‎我想藉著柏蒂提供的資訊 124 00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:28,698 ‎進一步說明我們的讀者群正在擴展中 ‎“有其”在東南部 125 00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:31,826 ‎沒錯,而那些區域… 126 00:07:31,909 --> 00:07:33,536 ‎居住著大批老鷹 127 00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:35,788 ‎我們可以針對老鷹做廣告 128 00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:39,208 ‎我們可以試試找尋戰利品 ‎把老鷹鑄造在硬幣上 129 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,335 ‎為禿鷹提供植髮方式 130 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:45,131 ‎老鷹們喜歡這些玩意 131 00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:48,426 ‎老鷹確實相當極端,非常好,德克 132 00:07:48,509 --> 00:07:50,219 ‎柏蒂,妳有什麼要補充的嗎? 133 00:07:51,095 --> 00:07:54,098 ‎-沒有,德克都提到了 ‎-對 134 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:03,483 ‎-啾… ‎-妳能小聲一點嗎? 135 00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:04,609 ‎對,可以別叫了嗎? 136 00:08:04,692 --> 00:08:06,944 ‎-喵 ‎-喵 137 00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:07,862 ‎抱歉 138 00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:13,784 ‎混帳鳥 139 00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:25,922 ‎普通高湯跟大骨高湯有什麼不同? 140 00:08:27,548 --> 00:08:29,634 ‎其中一個多了骨頭? 141 00:08:29,717 --> 00:08:32,094 ‎達菲,我真高興妳打電話來 142 00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:36,641 ‎最好的骨頭農場 ‎已經生產骨頭兩百年了 143 00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:40,019 ‎農場當然鬧鬼了,拜託 144 00:08:43,689 --> 00:08:44,899 ‎柏蒂,說吧 145 00:08:44,982 --> 00:08:49,445 ‎圖卡,我的公雞男同事毀了我的一天 146 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,072 ‎現在忙著替顧客服務 147 00:08:51,155 --> 00:08:54,200 ‎把他的照片傳給我 ‎我一有空就策劃謀殺他 148 00:08:54,825 --> 00:08:57,286 ‎-妳在做什麼? ‎-修剪樹叢 149 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,205 ‎那邊發生什麼事了? 150 00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,624 ‎我在這裡幫助人,我得掛電話了 151 00:09:01,707 --> 00:09:05,878 ‎聽我說,達菲,骨頭會吸走橘皮組織 152 00:09:05,962 --> 00:09:10,800 ‎或許有些女人能全然接受自我體態 ‎我可辦不到 153 00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:19,308 ‎我直接問他,對,要有自信 154 00:09:20,142 --> 00:09:21,811 ‎(老闆) 155 00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:24,605 ‎他看起來很忙,我不想打擾他 156 00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:31,362 ‎柏蒂,謝謝妳先前幫忙 ‎妳在會議裡提供不少協助 157 00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:33,197 ‎不客氣 158 00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:34,657 ‎為何垂頭喪氣的樣子? 159 00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:38,953 ‎沒什麼,我只是需要鼓起勇氣 ‎向何藍要求一件事 160 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:42,039 ‎是嗎?所以妳今天才穿緊身毛衣? 161 00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:43,874 ‎什麼? 162 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:47,169 ‎我相信不論妳要什麼,何藍都會給妳 163 00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:50,631 ‎不行,絕對不行 164 00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:53,551 ‎我不會忍受這種騷擾的行為 ‎我受夠了 165 00:09:53,634 --> 00:09:55,011 ‎-我受夠了 ‎-真噁心 166 00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:57,847 ‎我今天受夠了,我得去喝一杯酒 167 00:09:58,222 --> 00:10:03,102 ‎要拼“酒”怎能沒有德克? ‎還有其他字 168 00:10:03,185 --> 00:10:06,606 ‎-等一下 ‎-右邊還乖乖待著,而且很迷人 169 00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,733 ‎不行,想都別想 170 00:10:08,816 --> 00:10:11,068 ‎(替凱蘿組裝傢具,鳥城鳥羽路) 171 00:10:12,069 --> 00:10:16,198 ‎完成了,妳要基本款的櫥櫃 ‎這就是我組裝完成的 172 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:17,533 ‎太棒了 173 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:19,785 ‎對,完全遵照說明書的指示 174 00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,787 ‎然後我還把它升級 175 00:10:22,246 --> 00:10:24,081 ‎這是放肉的抽屜 176 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,459 ‎這是放起司的抽屜 177 00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:30,838 ‎妳每天得更換新的冰袋兩次 178 00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:33,883 ‎否則妳所有的衣服都會發臭 179 00:10:33,966 --> 00:10:37,011 ‎我的天,這完全不是我想要的 180 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,431 ‎我的最好朋友柏蒂 ‎很喜歡我在抽屜裡放滿火腿 181 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,267 ‎我和柏蒂總是一起做有趣的事 182 00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:46,270 ‎上週她的男友吃下他自己的祖母 183 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,566 ‎哈瓦蒂起司在哪裡? 184 00:10:51,942 --> 00:10:52,777 ‎有了 185 00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:01,035 ‎妳是人力資源部門的員工吧? 186 00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:02,495 ‎對,那個洞是怎麼回事? 187 00:11:02,578 --> 00:11:04,914 ‎這就是我來找妳談的原因… 188 00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:07,875 ‎妳應該遮起來 ‎那不是合宜的上班服裝 189 00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:12,338 ‎有位同事針對我的身體 ‎發表了超級噁心的評論 190 00:11:12,963 --> 00:11:13,839 ‎是誰? 191 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:16,967 ‎是德克 192 00:11:17,051 --> 00:11:19,178 ‎他很帥,妳真幸運 193 00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:23,265 ‎他可能是想恭維妳 194 00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:27,478 ‎最好別把這件事說出去 ‎有損公司的聲譽,所以… 195 00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:30,940 ‎或許妳可以跟他談談 ‎合宜的辦公室行為? 196 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,775 ‎那聽起來是令人尷尬的對話 197 00:11:32,858 --> 00:11:34,276 ‎那不就是妳的工作嗎? 198 00:11:35,611 --> 00:11:36,570 ‎這裡有一本小冊子 199 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:40,282 ‎(如何在工作場所負責任地調情 ‎並擄獲夢中男人) 200 00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:41,951 ‎謝了 201 00:11:50,042 --> 00:11:53,838 ‎這些冷切肉從哪裡來的? 202 00:11:54,171 --> 00:11:57,758 ‎我不知道肉從哪裡來的 ‎我是食物教授嗎? 203 00:11:58,259 --> 00:11:59,468 ‎她回來了 204 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:03,889 ‎你們好嗎?圖卡,妳的副業還好嗎? 205 00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:06,684 ‎很好,也許我做得太好了 206 00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:09,103 ‎妳知道有時我會提供過多協助吧? 207 00:12:09,186 --> 00:12:12,231 ‎-知道 ‎-天啊,妳的胸部怎麼了? 208 00:12:12,314 --> 00:12:17,069 ‎妳以胸部交換升遷的機會? ‎真是冷酷的談判者 209 00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:19,405 ‎很愚蠢的事,我不想談這件事 210 00:12:19,488 --> 00:12:23,284 ‎我覺得妳胸部的洞看起來很酷 211 00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:24,744 ‎謝了 212 00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:26,787 ‎-升遷的情況如何? ‎-對,快說 213 00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:28,622 ‎一切都… 214 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:34,587 ‎很順利 215 00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:37,923 ‎我要求升遷的機會,然後… 216 00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:39,425 ‎我們正在努力中 217 00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:46,390 ‎該以烤薯條來慶祝了 218 00:12:47,975 --> 00:12:50,686 ‎-捲捲薯條被我烤焦了 ‎-太好了 219 00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:55,775 ‎我去床上吃,床上薯條 220 00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:58,944 ‎-妳還好嗎? ‎-很好,只是工作累了 221 00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:01,280 ‎好,去放鬆一下,我稍後就去床上 222 00:13:01,363 --> 00:13:05,367 ‎別以薯條堆出新男友,薯條男友 223 00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:08,370 ‎(《斯貝克》,週四晚間9點) 224 00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,624 ‎斯貝克,我能使用你的筆電嗎? 225 00:13:11,707 --> 00:13:14,084 ‎妳的公寓裡不是有電腦? 226 00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:16,545 ‎我在我的公寓裡嗎? 227 00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:20,466 ‎好吧,但別熬夜看車禍影片 228 00:13:20,549 --> 00:13:22,510 ‎-好 ‎-看了一整夜的車禍影片後 229 00:13:22,593 --> 00:13:24,595 ‎別清除瀏覽資料 230 00:13:24,678 --> 00:13:25,638 ‎好 231 00:13:29,683 --> 00:13:31,936 ‎不好了… 232 00:13:32,019 --> 00:13:33,103 ‎(冰上的車) 233 00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:34,063 ‎不好了 234 00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:41,445 ‎真難熬的一天 235 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,489 ‎妳回來了 236 00:13:43,572 --> 00:13:46,283 ‎浪子胸部回頭了 237 00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:49,912 ‎我對於離開感到過意不去 ‎但我真的需要喝杯酒 238 00:13:49,995 --> 00:13:51,622 ‎好了…小柏蒂胸部 239 00:13:51,705 --> 00:13:53,874 ‎快告訴圖卡阿姨怎麼回事 240 00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:57,628 ‎我發誓,柏蒂的老闆 ‎幾乎沒注意到我們的存在 241 00:13:57,711 --> 00:13:58,546 ‎天啊 242 00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:02,299 ‎今天那個討厭的公雞還性騷擾我們 243 00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:04,051 ‎令人感到恥辱 244 00:14:04,134 --> 00:14:04,969 ‎真糟糕 245 00:14:05,052 --> 00:14:06,470 ‎加上廁所臭得要死 246 00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:10,182 ‎有個女士還在裡面一直講電話 ‎我們連上大號都沒辦法 247 00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:12,852 ‎太糟糕了,柏蒂需要我的幫助 248 00:14:12,935 --> 00:14:15,229 ‎對,她真的需要一些支持 249 00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:16,897 ‎胸罩笑話 250 00:14:17,231 --> 00:14:21,068 ‎(《柏蒂的胸部》 ‎平日晚間11點35分) 251 00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:24,947 ‎(康泰鳥巢公司,工作機會) 252 00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:30,327 ‎這次會比我在水上樂園跳出來 ‎更加有趣 253 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,037 ‎沒錯 254 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:36,041 ‎-我跳,看看我 ‎-快收起來 255 00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:38,419 ‎-這裡有小孩 ‎-不行,提米,不行 256 00:14:38,502 --> 00:14:41,171 ‎-別看,寶貝,別看 ‎-不好了 257 00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:43,465 ‎甜美的自由 258 00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:52,141 ‎嚴重宿醉 259 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,812 ‎給妳的驚喜,妳的工作糟透了 ‎我來改善這個情況 260 00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:57,897 ‎-什麼? ‎-看看辦公桌 261 00:14:59,815 --> 00:15:00,649 ‎圖卡… 262 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:04,361 ‎不僅那樣,我是這裡的新臨時僱員 263 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,448 ‎妳的胸部告訴我所有的事 264 00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:11,827 ‎我們要好好清理這個地方 ‎首先要做的事 265 00:15:12,202 --> 00:15:16,165 ‎達菲告訴我,我的喙上卡了東西 266 00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:19,084 ‎那是我的喙亮白貼片 267 00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,962 ‎我去吃午餐時,忘了撕下來 268 00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:26,258 ‎仙黛爾,我發誓 ‎實在太好笑了,真是的 269 00:15:26,884 --> 00:15:29,261 ‎紅色絲絨高跟鞋,妳的時間到了 270 00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:32,097 ‎不好意思,我在講電話 271 00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:34,391 ‎這看起來像是電話亭嗎? 272 00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:35,309 ‎我只是… 273 00:15:35,392 --> 00:15:38,395 ‎中間的廁所?妳開什麼玩笑? ‎中間是緩衝區 274 00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:41,857 ‎不該使用這一間,大家都知道的事 275 00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:44,109 ‎妳得去廁所學校重新上課 276 00:15:44,568 --> 00:15:48,739 ‎等一下,妳在這一層樓上班嗎? 277 00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:53,202 ‎-我根本不是在這棟大樓上班 ‎-我也不是,出去 278 00:15:55,371 --> 00:15:57,122 ‎臨時範本們,進來 279 00:15:57,831 --> 00:16:00,292 ‎把廁所變得舒適點 280 00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,752 ‎他們是… 281 00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:04,213 ‎他們是辦公室裡的另外兩名臨時僱員 282 00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:05,589 ‎我稱他們臨時範本 283 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,132 ‎臨時範本 284 00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:10,636 ‎-他們為何由妳掌管? ‎-兩個詞,柏蒂,自信 285 00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:14,974 ‎其中一個詞是“柏蒂”?算了 286 00:16:15,057 --> 00:16:16,308 ‎我等一下要去開會 287 00:16:17,267 --> 00:16:19,478 ‎太好了,該執行我的下一步計劃了 288 00:16:20,646 --> 00:16:23,941 ‎各位,我們已經解決了日常辦公事務 289 00:16:24,024 --> 00:16:25,776 ‎現在來討論行銷策略 290 00:16:25,859 --> 00:16:27,403 ‎德克,從你開始吧 291 00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:30,572 ‎好,我查看了更多資訊,我… 292 00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:40,749 ‎我只想重申我昨天提出的老鷹策略 293 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,251 ‎還有老鷹們喜歡做的事 294 00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:44,878 ‎好,今天有任何新的想法嗎? 295 00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:48,090 ‎或許也對較小的鷹科做廣告? 296 00:16:52,136 --> 00:16:53,637 ‎當長達3分鐘沒有女性發言 297 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:56,974 ‎就會出現這種警報聲 298 00:17:01,770 --> 00:17:05,274 ‎我相信我的朋友柏蒂有話要說 299 00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:06,400 ‎說吧,柏蒂 300 00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:10,863 ‎根據我的調查 301 00:17:10,946 --> 00:17:15,075 ‎我們可以針對偏好呱呱叫 ‎大呼小叫與懶惰的族群做廣告 302 00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:17,036 ‎我指的可不是圖卡 303 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,913 ‎(《柏蒂》,週六早上10點) 304 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,790 ‎我指的是水禽 305 00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:26,962 ‎真是太棒了 306 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:29,590 ‎魯莽又再次救援成功 307 00:17:29,673 --> 00:17:32,676 ‎-打擾一下,妳叫什麼名字? ‎-圖卡,我是臨時僱員 308 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:36,472 ‎妳看起來似乎很有野心 ‎具有創意並跳脫傳統框架 309 00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:39,808 ‎女牛仔、吹雪機、冰棒 310 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:42,144 ‎抱歉,我以為我們只是列出東西 311 00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:44,521 ‎真迷人,我想聽聽妳的一些想法 312 00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:46,231 ‎或許稍後我可以向妳討教 313 00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:48,609 ‎好,不過我的腦袋裡只是一堆花生 314 00:17:49,693 --> 00:17:52,237 ‎天啊,我的老闆真的很喜歡妳 315 00:17:52,321 --> 00:17:54,490 ‎對,我只不過大聲喊叫 316 00:18:00,871 --> 00:18:06,585 ‎我午餐要吃玉米片,香辣玉米片 317 00:18:11,298 --> 00:18:14,009 ‎香辣玉米片… 318 00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:16,970 ‎香辣玉米片讓我脹氣,但我愛死了 319 00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:19,306 ‎-妳又把玉米片當午餐了? ‎-沒有 320 00:18:19,389 --> 00:18:21,433 ‎好,過來領午餐 321 00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:23,685 ‎肉丸子配菜,很棒的選擇,莎拉 322 00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:27,022 ‎早餐墨西哥捲餅 ‎週二瘋狂的選擇,辛蒂 323 00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:29,566 ‎素食驚喜,拿去吧 324 00:18:29,650 --> 00:18:31,652 ‎裡面有肉,那就是驚喜 325 00:18:31,735 --> 00:18:34,071 ‎-現在午餐變得有趣了 ‎-這是你的,何藍 326 00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:35,823 ‎做得好,圖卡 327 00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:38,909 ‎妳真的很擅長做這件事 328 00:18:38,992 --> 00:18:41,703 ‎對,我想我至少得做一件 329 00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:43,497 ‎辦公室經理交代我該做的事 330 00:18:43,580 --> 00:18:45,332 ‎交給我,克勞黛 331 00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:46,959 ‎放心交給我 332 00:18:49,044 --> 00:18:51,046 ‎克勞黛以前從沒笑過 333 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:53,423 ‎圖卡,妳能來我的辦公室聊一下嗎? 334 00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:55,551 ‎我想問問妳對某件事的看法 335 00:18:56,051 --> 00:18:57,511 ‎好,臨時範本 336 00:18:57,886 --> 00:18:59,221 ‎(彈跳床) 337 00:19:00,889 --> 00:19:03,308 ‎-你家有游泳池嗎? ‎-有,怎麼了? 338 00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,310 ‎我下週末可以在你家開派對嗎? 339 00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:08,188 ‎圖卡? 340 00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:16,655 ‎讓我知道你是否想把這裡變得更有趣 341 00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:19,032 ‎我可以利用義式香腸分配器 ‎替你建造書桌 342 00:19:19,199 --> 00:19:20,242 ‎那不是委婉的說法 343 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,953 ‎真是的,圖卡 344 00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:25,581 ‎柏蒂人呢? 345 00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:28,667 ‎柏蒂… 346 00:19:28,917 --> 00:19:30,752 ‎(尿、擦、沖,妳很美) 347 00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:31,879 ‎柏蒂 348 00:19:31,962 --> 00:19:35,299 ‎妳的臨時範本們把這裡整理得很舒適 349 00:19:36,758 --> 00:19:37,968 ‎怎麼了?好友 350 00:19:38,051 --> 00:19:41,930 ‎我以為我無法出人頭地 ‎是因為這裡有性別歧視 351 00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:45,726 ‎可是妳才來一天,妳卻令人驚艷 352 00:19:45,809 --> 00:19:47,102 ‎我知道,真是太瘋狂了 353 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:49,313 ‎妳老闆想把妳要的升遷機會給我 354 00:19:54,610 --> 00:20:00,991 ‎所以我沒有得到升遷機會 ‎是因為我很差勁? 355 00:20:01,074 --> 00:20:02,451 ‎妳一點都不差勁 356 00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:05,537 ‎妳是那個在會議中提出聰明建議的人 357 00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:07,080 ‎也應該獲得升遷 358 00:20:07,164 --> 00:20:08,540 ‎妳只是從來不居功 359 00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:11,752 ‎妳幾乎讓所有人踩著妳的胸部往上爬 360 00:20:11,835 --> 00:20:13,503 ‎我放棄了 361 00:20:13,587 --> 00:20:14,796 ‎柏蒂,不行 362 00:20:15,088 --> 00:20:17,883 ‎何藍得找人做那份工作 ‎我跟他說我會考慮 363 00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:19,551 ‎但我只是想讓妳有多一點時間 364 00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:21,970 ‎我很確定他的前兩位人選是我和德克 365 00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:24,765 ‎不行,德克是性騷擾者 366 00:20:24,848 --> 00:20:26,141 ‎我們得想辦法 367 00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:27,684 ‎我可能有個辦法 368 00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:33,232 ‎選擇好之後移到右邊 369 00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:36,109 ‎然後有品味的小插圖 370 00:20:36,693 --> 00:20:37,569 ‎一隻老虎 371 00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:40,280 ‎看起來真的很棒 372 00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:42,783 ‎-愛死那隻老虎 ‎-喵 373 00:20:42,866 --> 00:20:44,868 ‎我命令妳列印 374 00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:47,204 ‎(性騷擾研討會,下午4點 ‎強制參加) 375 00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:12,729 ‎(性騷擾研討會) 376 00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:17,317 ‎我沒有為研討會做充分準備 ‎不過我們從基本開始 377 00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:18,652 ‎誰能告訴我 378 00:21:18,735 --> 00:21:21,697 ‎可以對這個娃娃的哪個部位吹口哨? 379 00:21:23,907 --> 00:21:25,200 ‎接下來的計劃呢? 380 00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:28,704 ‎我不知道 ‎我以為德克在這個會議裡會感到愧疚 381 00:21:28,787 --> 00:21:31,039 ‎然後承認對我的性騷擾 382 00:21:34,459 --> 00:21:36,253 ‎妳這個純真的傻瓜 383 00:21:36,336 --> 00:21:40,590 ‎如果我們未經同意就被親吻 ‎也許有點碰到舌頭 384 00:21:40,674 --> 00:21:43,093 ‎真的有必要用到“襲擊”這個詞嗎? 385 00:21:43,176 --> 00:21:44,219 ‎感覺有點太嚴厲了 386 00:21:46,179 --> 00:21:47,097 ‎真是夠了 387 00:21:47,556 --> 00:21:51,977 ‎好,大家好 ‎我認為這個辦公室存在性騷擾的問題 388 00:21:52,060 --> 00:21:53,937 ‎我要談論這個問題 389 00:21:54,021 --> 00:21:54,896 ‎對… 390 00:21:54,980 --> 00:21:58,400 ‎柏蒂,說故事的部分 ‎是安排在我示範保險套之後 391 00:21:58,942 --> 00:22:02,446 ‎德克,你昨天對我說的話 ‎令我覺得不自在 392 00:22:04,197 --> 00:22:05,157 ‎我只是開玩笑的 393 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:08,368 ‎那是很不當的發言,我的胸部逃走了 394 00:22:08,535 --> 00:22:11,079 ‎很抱歉我的玩笑傷了妳的感情 395 00:22:11,163 --> 00:22:14,166 ‎-他對我的態度也很怪異 ‎-他摸我的屁股 396 00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:17,461 ‎他捏我的鵝,我是說胸,我是一隻鵝 397 00:22:17,961 --> 00:22:18,962 ‎真是個調皮的男子 398 00:22:19,046 --> 00:22:22,007 ‎你逼我在工作場所思考我的身體 399 00:22:22,090 --> 00:22:23,342 ‎真是噁心 400 00:22:23,425 --> 00:22:24,801 ‎-對 ‎-沒錯 401 00:22:24,885 --> 00:22:26,595 ‎身體太可怕了 402 00:22:26,678 --> 00:22:28,889 ‎大家先別進入暴民心態 403 00:22:28,972 --> 00:22:32,184 ‎德克,你應該去收拾東西 ‎今天就先下班吧 404 00:22:39,066 --> 00:22:40,400 ‎(會議室) 405 00:22:40,484 --> 00:22:43,111 ‎做得好,柏蒂,妳處理掉那個變態 406 00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:44,404 ‎對,感覺真好 407 00:22:44,488 --> 00:22:47,991 ‎-去向何藍要求妳應得的東西 ‎-好吧 408 00:22:48,658 --> 00:22:49,493 ‎臨時範本 409 00:22:49,701 --> 00:22:52,079 ‎(衛生棉條) 410 00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:59,461 ‎柏蒂,我要謝謝妳今天的發言 411 00:22:59,544 --> 00:23:02,255 ‎-如果妳有不愉快的經驗,我很抱歉 ‎-我能升遷嗎? 412 00:23:03,465 --> 00:23:05,300 ‎聽著,我想成為資深營運分析師 413 00:23:05,384 --> 00:23:06,968 ‎我會做得很好,我想要那份工作 414 00:23:07,052 --> 00:23:08,845 ‎真希望女洗手間裡增加一間廁所 415 00:23:08,929 --> 00:23:10,013 ‎為什麼我說個不停? 416 00:23:10,097 --> 00:23:13,058 ‎我一直希望妳會要求那個升遷機會 ‎妳是完美的候選人 417 00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:17,854 ‎-等一下,這表示… ‎-沒錯,克勞黛? 418 00:23:17,938 --> 00:23:20,857 ‎今天就讓柏蒂搬到那間空辦公室 419 00:23:20,941 --> 00:23:23,527 ‎什麼?成真了 420 00:23:23,777 --> 00:23:25,695 ‎去死吧,克勞黛 421 00:23:26,822 --> 00:23:27,739 ‎抱歉,克勞黛 422 00:23:31,118 --> 00:23:33,620 ‎天啊,我終於來到這裡了 423 00:23:34,496 --> 00:23:35,956 ‎我得到我想要的 424 00:23:41,336 --> 00:23:43,004 ‎(還好嗎?妳的新工作是否…) 425 00:23:46,675 --> 00:23:49,052 ‎要回家了?才6點半 426 00:23:49,136 --> 00:23:52,722 ‎妳有很多工作要做 ‎資深營運分析師女士 427 00:24:56,369 --> 00:24:59,247 ‎(《鳥城報》) 428 00:24:59,331 --> 00:25:01,166 ‎(親愛的報紙,坑洞很糟 ‎體面狗上) 429 00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:11,259 ‎字幕翻譯:黃琪芳