1 00:00:01,201 --> 00:00:02,534 ♪ bertie & tuca and tuca & bertie ♪ 2 00:00:02,536 --> 00:00:04,203 ♪ tuca & bertie ♪ [vocalizes] 3 00:00:04,939 --> 00:00:05,870 [crowd cheers] 4 00:00:05,872 --> 00:00:07,539 -♪ tuca ♪ -♪ bertie ♪ 5 00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:09,775 [tuca and bertie vocalizing] 6 00:00:11,411 --> 00:00:14,546 [vocalizing continues] 7 00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:18,450 [gentle music] 8 00:00:23,023 --> 00:00:24,222 [sighs] 9 00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:26,358 What a wonderful regenerative way 10 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:27,359 To end the weekend. 11 00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,828 No obligations. No plans. 12 00:00:29,830 --> 00:00:33,898 That's why I chose to live a healthy, zero-plan lifestyle. 13 00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:35,433 [rumbles] 14 00:00:35,435 --> 00:00:37,302 -What's that cloud? -Oh. 15 00:00:37,304 --> 00:00:40,505 Huh. It's all looming and portend-y. 16 00:00:40,507 --> 00:00:42,141 [speckle and bertie scream] 17 00:00:43,577 --> 00:00:44,576 [mouse clicks] 18 00:00:47,314 --> 00:00:50,048 [loud thudding in distance] 19 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,985 [loud thudding continues] 20 00:00:52,987 --> 00:00:54,186 [angry sigh] 21 00:00:56,590 --> 00:00:59,257 Hi, dirk. Could you not do that right now? 22 00:00:59,259 --> 00:01:00,859 No dice, pumpkin spice. 23 00:01:00,861 --> 00:01:01,860 [chuckles] helps me focus. 24 00:01:01,862 --> 00:01:05,998 Yeah, about that, I noticed a lot of typos 25 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:07,466 In the last report you filed. 26 00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:08,733 Hey, it's not my fault, 27 00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:10,535 I don't know how to use an oxford comma. 28 00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:12,537 I only know princeton commas. 29 00:01:12,539 --> 00:01:14,807 And a year off in europe apostrophes. 30 00:01:14,809 --> 00:01:15,808 Can you just fix it, please? 31 00:01:15,810 --> 00:01:20,012 Ugh! Fine! After this free throw. 32 00:01:20,014 --> 00:01:21,279 [grunts] 33 00:01:21,281 --> 00:01:23,348 -[shatters] -[thuds] 34 00:01:23,350 --> 00:01:24,450 [clanks] 35 00:01:26,020 --> 00:01:27,152 Swish! 36 00:01:27,154 --> 00:01:28,753 [angry groan] 37 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:31,190 [upbeat music] 38 00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:37,930 [lively music] 39 00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:49,908 Bertie, you're shimmering so brightly this morning! 40 00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:52,244 Oh, sorry! Just finishing up! 41 00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:55,381 Try one! 42 00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:57,982 [crunches] oh, my god. 43 00:01:57,984 --> 00:01:59,051 Babe, you're gonna sell 44 00:01:59,053 --> 00:02:00,052 Like a million of these at work today. 45 00:02:00,054 --> 00:02:02,187 Babe, you're gonna sell 46 00:02:02,189 --> 00:02:04,590 Yeah! Let's cake it till we make it. 47 00:02:07,794 --> 00:02:10,328 What "office supplies" do you need? 48 00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:12,130 I'll take two binders 49 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,999 And a ream of your special paper. 50 00:02:15,001 --> 00:02:17,636 -And a stapler. -Hmm. 51 00:02:19,339 --> 00:02:20,739 [bell dings] 52 00:02:20,741 --> 00:02:23,141 -Mmm. -Ew. 53 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:27,011 Uh, hey, tuca, we're running low on "binders" so-- 54 00:02:27,013 --> 00:02:28,680 -Tuca, what are you doing here? -Eep! 55 00:02:28,682 --> 00:02:31,349 It's, uh, bring your toucan to work day? 56 00:02:31,351 --> 00:02:32,684 -It is? -[phone beeps] 57 00:02:32,686 --> 00:02:34,553 Harold, get down here immediately. 58 00:02:34,555 --> 00:02:35,888 I don't care about your job. 59 00:02:35,890 --> 00:02:39,491 I need my toucan at work today and that's you! 60 00:02:39,493 --> 00:02:41,626 -[fire crackles] -[crowd screams] 61 00:02:41,628 --> 00:02:44,429 Sorry, everyone. My friend needs me. 62 00:02:44,431 --> 00:02:46,164 Oh, it's okay. 63 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,966 Friends come first. 64 00:02:47,968 --> 00:02:50,102 [both giggling] 65 00:02:50,104 --> 00:02:51,770 Whew! That was a close one! 66 00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:54,573 [bertie] man, we barely break even on these, 67 00:02:54,575 --> 00:02:56,641 But I don't care. I love this shit! 68 00:02:56,643 --> 00:02:58,443 Duh! It's your passion! 69 00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:00,579 Baking makes your blood run hot! 70 00:03:00,581 --> 00:03:03,982 It does. It gets me so hot! 71 00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:06,251 I wish I had a driving force like that. 72 00:03:06,253 --> 00:03:07,185 A thing I'm so good at, 73 00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,788 I wish I had a driving force like that. 74 00:03:09,790 --> 00:03:12,190 But I'm equally exemplary at all things! 75 00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,526 Damn my extreme competencery! 76 00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:15,794 -[dings] -mm-mm. 77 00:03:15,796 --> 00:03:17,996 Bertie, you're on your own for the rest of the week. 78 00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:21,199 I gotta root out my own passion, like a passion pig. 79 00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:22,867 -[pig grunts] -okay! 80 00:03:22,869 --> 00:03:26,204 [upbeat music] 81 00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:29,007 Hmm. Garbage collector. 82 00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:32,677 I could easily get carried away with any of these jobs. 83 00:03:32,679 --> 00:03:34,813 Hey! The sign factory is hiring! 84 00:03:34,815 --> 00:03:37,449 Imagine all the crazy signs I could make. 85 00:03:45,292 --> 00:03:46,491 Stupid street! 86 00:03:46,493 --> 00:03:48,226 -[chuckles] -[horns honk] 87 00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:50,895 Eh! Hey! Watch it! 88 00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:52,698 [horns honking] 89 00:03:54,434 --> 00:03:56,034 Stop! 90 00:03:56,036 --> 00:03:57,502 Okay, now you go. 91 00:03:57,504 --> 00:03:58,971 You turn left. 92 00:03:58,973 --> 00:04:01,106 Okay, now hold for pedestrians. 93 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:03,508 Come on through! 94 00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:05,377 [engines revving] 95 00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:06,979 Yeah! 96 00:04:06,981 --> 00:04:08,913 Hey! You know what it is! 97 00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:10,515 It's brangley brangalang 98 00:04:10,517 --> 00:04:13,385 And this is called "running with bucket feet". 99 00:04:13,387 --> 00:04:14,620 Yeah! 100 00:04:15,455 --> 00:04:17,121 -[thuds] -[groans] 101 00:04:17,123 --> 00:04:19,123 [laughter] 102 00:04:19,125 --> 00:04:21,926 Oh, um, I reserved this conference room. 103 00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:24,129 All right. Got it, mom. 104 00:04:24,131 --> 00:04:26,264 First, just one more video? 105 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,265 Please, mom? 106 00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:29,334 [h.R. Lady] please, mommy? 107 00:04:29,336 --> 00:04:32,070 You are my birth mother and I am your widdle baby. 108 00:04:32,072 --> 00:04:35,340 Can we watch another video, pwetty pwease? 109 00:04:35,342 --> 00:04:38,276 Ugh, fine. Jeezus! 110 00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:39,944 Hey! Oh! Whoa! 111 00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:41,413 -Okay, that was so funny. - Hey! 112 00:04:41,415 --> 00:04:44,148 Haha, now let's turn it off. 113 00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:45,750 -[brangley] whoa! Whoa! -[buzzer buzzes] 114 00:04:45,752 --> 00:04:47,085 -[laughter] -I gotta give 115 00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,287 A slide presentation for the ad clients 116 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,890 -To understand our... The... - Hello, and welcome back 117 00:04:51,892 --> 00:04:55,227 To tasty bakes, hosted by me, pastry pete. 118 00:04:55,229 --> 00:04:57,896 You may remember I was recently "canceled" 119 00:04:57,898 --> 00:05:00,098 Due to a pattern of alleged behavior 120 00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:03,502 Towards several non-famous women. 121 00:05:03,504 --> 00:05:06,839 I want to respond by saying, "I'm sorry." 122 00:05:06,841 --> 00:05:09,174 But I don't just want to say it. 123 00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:10,709 I want to bake it! 124 00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:15,113 With my new recipe for "I'm sorry" strudels. 125 00:05:15,115 --> 00:05:16,915 [fireworks crackling] 126 00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:19,184 [pastry pete] step one. You must be accused 127 00:05:19,186 --> 00:05:20,719 Of doing something vaguely bad... 128 00:05:20,721 --> 00:05:21,920 [dirk] uh, bertie... 129 00:05:21,922 --> 00:05:23,722 Didn't you used to work for that guy? 130 00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:26,591 After your dessert and the alleged victims 131 00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:27,726 Have cooled off, 132 00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:29,461 You move on, a changed man. 133 00:05:29,463 --> 00:05:34,466 Remember, it's easy to cancel, it's sophisticated to forgive! 134 00:05:34,468 --> 00:05:36,635 So smash that subscribe button! 135 00:05:38,673 --> 00:05:40,405 [clicks] 136 00:05:40,407 --> 00:05:42,074 Dirk's driving me nuts. 137 00:05:42,076 --> 00:05:43,676 Men think they can just walk all over you, 138 00:05:43,678 --> 00:05:45,744 Waste your time, and make you feel small, 139 00:05:45,746 --> 00:05:47,479 And they think they can do whatever they want 140 00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:49,347 Just because they taught you how to bake! 141 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:51,349 -Bake? -[sighs] 142 00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:52,951 How about we try something? 143 00:05:52,953 --> 00:05:54,419 [gasps] this is super cool. 144 00:05:54,421 --> 00:05:57,489 It's a therapy technique called "inner bird systems". 145 00:05:57,491 --> 00:05:59,958 Let's get under the hood and poke around! 146 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,293 Okay. 147 00:06:01,295 --> 00:06:02,694 Close your eyes. 148 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,229 Clear your mind. 149 00:06:04,231 --> 00:06:08,032 Now, visualize a version of yourself 150 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:10,769 Who could easily handle your anxiety 151 00:06:10,771 --> 00:06:12,771 And deal with men like dirk. 152 00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:13,772 Mm. 153 00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:16,441 You can picture anyone andin the world, bertie.Irk. 154 00:06:16,443 --> 00:06:18,510 Anyone or anything. 155 00:06:20,114 --> 00:06:21,380 -Sup. -Uh... 156 00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:22,581 What do you see? 157 00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:25,049 It's... It's just a bro... 158 00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:27,319 The name's kyle. Don't wear it out! 159 00:06:27,321 --> 00:06:30,255 A bro? What's this bro doing? 160 00:06:30,257 --> 00:06:31,990 He's just, uh, chillin'. 161 00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:34,593 Chillin' like a good guy, or... 162 00:06:34,595 --> 00:06:36,328 No. Like a villain. 163 00:06:36,330 --> 00:06:37,462 Interesting. 164 00:06:37,464 --> 00:06:38,997 Every other time I've tried this, 165 00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:41,200 People just picture themselves in a power suit. 166 00:06:43,670 --> 00:06:47,239 [upbeat music] 167 00:06:51,145 --> 00:06:53,812 [tires screeching] 168 00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,149 Go. Now you. 169 00:06:57,151 --> 00:06:59,484 Don't be shy. I see you! 170 00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:01,353 Go ahead and accelerate, boo! 171 00:07:01,355 --> 00:07:02,621 -[bell rings] -[tires screech] 172 00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:06,224 Oh, hey! You almost hit my sexy new sports car! 173 00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:08,026 Nobody's impressed by your car, dude! 174 00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:09,494 [groans] there. 175 00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:10,695 Now it's not perfect 176 00:07:10,697 --> 00:07:12,030 So you don't have to worry anymore! 177 00:07:12,032 --> 00:07:13,165 Oh, my god. 178 00:07:13,167 --> 00:07:15,367 Heck, yeah! I'm free! 179 00:07:15,369 --> 00:07:16,835 [thumping] 180 00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,039 [whistle blows] 181 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:24,677 [upbeat music] 182 00:07:29,316 --> 00:07:30,582 [ducks quack] 183 00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:33,919 [horns honking] 184 00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:37,222 [ducks quacking] 185 00:07:38,659 --> 00:07:40,659 Thank you, traffic lady! 186 00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:43,128 Glory be! 187 00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,463 Our goddess of the road! 188 00:07:44,465 --> 00:07:46,231 [applause] 189 00:07:48,068 --> 00:07:50,268 Yeah, we can totally hook you up with that, my man. 190 00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:54,206 Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool... 191 00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:56,541 Dirk, could you stop dribbling for a minute? 192 00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:58,210 -I just have a headache and-- -ugh. 193 00:07:58,212 --> 00:08:00,212 Gonna have to call you back. 194 00:08:00,214 --> 00:08:02,147 [laughing] 195 00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:04,749 Don't let the pc police hear you say that. 196 00:08:04,751 --> 00:08:05,950 [laughs] all right. 197 00:08:05,952 --> 00:08:07,352 -Catch ya later. -[beeps] 198 00:08:07,354 --> 00:08:08,687 There. Happy? 199 00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:11,756 I, uh, that's not what I meant. 200 00:08:11,758 --> 00:08:13,758 [loud thudding] 201 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:16,761 Hey, kyle, do you have a minute? 202 00:08:16,763 --> 00:08:18,296 Sure. Whatever's clever. 203 00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:20,565 I just need help articulating an argument 204 00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:21,766 So that dirk empathizes with-- 205 00:08:21,768 --> 00:08:24,436 Nah, dude, just go like... "bro?" 206 00:08:24,438 --> 00:08:25,838 -That's it? -Shyeah. 207 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:28,373 It's a wicked versatile word. 208 00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:30,175 [thudding] 209 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:32,344 Um... Bro? 210 00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:34,312 Bro? 211 00:08:34,314 --> 00:08:36,581 Bro. Brah. 212 00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:38,183 Bro. Brah. 213 00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:39,317 Bro. 214 00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:41,220 Tsk. Bro! 215 00:08:45,926 --> 00:08:47,459 -[beeps] -hey, man, I'm back. 216 00:08:47,461 --> 00:08:48,527 Let's do it to it. 217 00:08:48,529 --> 00:08:50,795 Kyle, that was amazing! 218 00:08:50,797 --> 00:08:51,996 It's no big whoop. 219 00:08:51,998 --> 00:08:53,932 I can't believe that actually worked. 220 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:55,734 You're like my secret power! 221 00:08:55,736 --> 00:08:58,136 Yah. I'm good at a lot of things. 222 00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:00,605 Like people tell me I'd be good at stand-up 223 00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:02,541 'cause I'm always filling silences 224 00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,843 With like really funny jokes. 225 00:09:10,817 --> 00:09:13,218 [light music] 226 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:14,787 [gulps] 227 00:09:16,490 --> 00:09:17,423 -[gasps] -hey, bertie. 228 00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:22,561 Oh, are, are you sure? I have them right-- 229 00:09:22,563 --> 00:09:23,828 Okay, thanks, bye! 230 00:09:23,830 --> 00:09:26,065 [h.R. Lady] I don't need them anymore. 231 00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:32,304 Eek! 232 00:09:33,507 --> 00:09:34,406 Argh! 233 00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:36,875 [gasps] 234 00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:41,313 You're buying stuff at pastry pete's? 235 00:09:41,315 --> 00:09:42,647 How could you? 236 00:09:42,649 --> 00:09:45,183 Oh, yeah. He did something bad, right? 237 00:09:45,185 --> 00:09:47,519 It's so hard to keep track! 238 00:09:47,521 --> 00:09:49,388 He was a huge creep to me. 239 00:09:49,390 --> 00:09:50,923 And to other women! 240 00:09:50,925 --> 00:09:54,993 [gulps] well, he did say sorry. 241 00:09:54,995 --> 00:09:56,929 I mean, what do you want? 242 00:09:56,931 --> 00:09:59,531 Do you expect people like him to just disappear? 243 00:09:59,533 --> 00:10:00,933 Yeah. Yes! 244 00:10:00,935 --> 00:10:04,669 They should get sent to... Like an island 245 00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:06,005 For bad men! 246 00:10:07,073 --> 00:10:09,041 [thunder rumbling] 247 00:10:09,676 --> 00:10:10,976 [thuds] 248 00:10:13,547 --> 00:10:14,746 [both groan] 249 00:10:14,748 --> 00:10:18,250 [calypso music] 250 00:10:23,824 --> 00:10:27,126 [calypso music continues] 251 00:10:29,229 --> 00:10:31,430 [all moaning] 252 00:10:31,432 --> 00:10:33,165 Hmm... No. 253 00:10:33,167 --> 00:10:37,869 That, that's not quite right. 254 00:10:37,871 --> 00:10:40,072 Fancy an afternoon "calculator"? 255 00:10:40,074 --> 00:10:41,072 No? 256 00:10:41,074 --> 00:10:42,941 Need any "binders"? 257 00:10:42,943 --> 00:10:46,445 They're blueberry... Okay, jeez! 258 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:50,882 [groans] 259 00:10:50,884 --> 00:10:53,218 If only I had a pastry that could compete 260 00:10:53,220 --> 00:10:57,022 With pastry pete's stupid, gimmicky atonement donuts. 261 00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:59,424 Yah, you need a product that like, 262 00:10:59,426 --> 00:11:02,294 Cuts through the noise of the pastry industry. 263 00:11:02,296 --> 00:11:03,429 Like what? 264 00:11:03,431 --> 00:11:05,697 I dunno. Baking's for girls! 265 00:11:05,699 --> 00:11:08,700 [bertie] no. No. Not quite right. 266 00:11:08,702 --> 00:11:09,968 [chugs, burps] 267 00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:11,036 -[smashes] -[laughs] 268 00:11:11,038 --> 00:11:13,305 I like how cans crush. 269 00:11:13,307 --> 00:11:14,406 [bertie] hmm. 270 00:11:15,575 --> 00:11:17,776 Whoa, that looks sick. [grunts] 271 00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:19,244 [chugs] 272 00:11:19,246 --> 00:11:21,046 This is dope. 273 00:11:21,048 --> 00:11:22,848 [gulps] gets me frickin' pumped! 274 00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:24,249 Ultra pumped! 275 00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:25,951 [kyle groans] 276 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:27,453 Eep! 277 00:11:28,456 --> 00:11:29,921 -You're big. -Shyeah. 278 00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:31,923 Now, it'll be easier for me to help you. 279 00:11:31,925 --> 00:11:34,259 Oh. Dope! 280 00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:36,362 [upbeat music] 281 00:11:39,867 --> 00:11:41,933 -[thuds] -uh, what's going on? 282 00:11:41,935 --> 00:11:43,802 Kyle's helping me scale up 283 00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:45,537 By ditching my gourmet ingredients. 284 00:11:45,539 --> 00:11:48,740 Ooh. Kyle. 285 00:11:48,742 --> 00:11:50,275 -Who is kyle again? -Sup. 286 00:11:50,277 --> 00:11:52,077 He's a guy bertie created in therapy. 287 00:11:52,079 --> 00:11:53,411 How did you know, tuca? 288 00:11:53,413 --> 00:11:55,613 He's just one of the many basic brodies 289 00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:56,682 I follow on social media. 290 00:11:56,684 --> 00:11:59,485 [upbeat music] 291 00:11:59,487 --> 00:12:02,020 Hey, whatchu working on there, chief? 292 00:12:02,022 --> 00:12:02,954 Not much. 293 00:12:03,090 --> 00:12:05,957 Just helping this chick by putting rad art on her wall. 294 00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:07,893 Aw, it's like having a stepson 295 00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:09,761 I don't understand or relate to at all. 296 00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:11,429 You need any help, buddy? 297 00:12:11,431 --> 00:12:14,166 I'm gonna go get my level, okay, pal? 298 00:12:14,168 --> 00:12:16,168 Whatever tops your pizza, my dude. 299 00:12:16,170 --> 00:12:18,770 So... You look strong. 300 00:12:18,772 --> 00:12:21,707 Yeah. My muscles are my main hobby. 301 00:12:21,709 --> 00:12:24,242 Bertie, can I borrow him for a night of meaningless sex 302 00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,512 To help relieve the stress of my important new job? 303 00:12:26,514 --> 00:12:27,779 Hmm. Uh... 304 00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:29,381 He's a facet of myself 305 00:12:29,383 --> 00:12:32,317 And projection of my own insecurity. 306 00:12:32,319 --> 00:12:34,452 Why'd you project him to be so hot? 307 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:35,653 That's on you. 308 00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:36,855 [whistle blows] 309 00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:38,456 -Come on. Giddy-up! -[groans] 310 00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:41,326 Tuca! Don't have sex with my inner bird! 311 00:12:41,328 --> 00:12:43,462 [tuca] too late! Already did! 312 00:12:44,398 --> 00:12:48,066 [upbeat music] 313 00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:50,001 The people need me to exert power 314 00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:52,338 Over the congested chaos of their lives. 315 00:12:52,340 --> 00:12:54,806 Does it make me feel good? I won't lie. 316 00:12:54,808 --> 00:12:56,475 Yes. Yes, it does. 317 00:12:57,811 --> 00:12:59,277 But power carries weight. 318 00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:01,679 Should I use that power responsibly? 319 00:13:01,681 --> 00:13:04,950 Or should I have a little fun, tuca-style? 320 00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:06,151 [whistle blows] 321 00:13:06,153 --> 00:13:08,220 Wow. I don't understand you, 322 00:13:08,222 --> 00:13:10,822 But... I respect you. 323 00:13:10,824 --> 00:13:13,559 I wanna support you while you follow your dreams. 324 00:13:13,561 --> 00:13:15,493 I wanna build a life with you 325 00:13:15,495 --> 00:13:17,829 And take care of all the housework and childcare 326 00:13:17,831 --> 00:13:19,431 While you rise in power. 327 00:13:19,433 --> 00:13:20,632 Is this love? 328 00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:22,033 [whistle blows] 329 00:13:22,035 --> 00:13:24,035 You! Hot dumbass! Leave! 330 00:13:24,037 --> 00:13:25,103 Yes, ma'am. 331 00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:28,107 [upbeat music] 332 00:13:29,910 --> 00:13:32,444 Thank you, come again! [gasps] 333 00:13:32,446 --> 00:13:33,579 Oh! 334 00:13:33,581 --> 00:13:35,147 [suspenseful music] 335 00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,917 I'm still not sure about this design. 336 00:13:38,919 --> 00:13:41,719 -It's so... -[rattling] 337 00:13:41,721 --> 00:13:43,054 ...Confrontational. 338 00:13:43,056 --> 00:13:44,189 Don't worry, babe. 339 00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:46,592 [puka shell horn blows] 340 00:13:46,594 --> 00:13:48,660 [people clamoring] 341 00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:50,596 [overlapping chatter] 342 00:13:50,598 --> 00:13:53,165 [cash register dings] 343 00:13:55,068 --> 00:13:57,069 I am frickin' pumped! 344 00:13:57,071 --> 00:14:00,739 Cock-a-doodledoo! 345 00:14:00,741 --> 00:14:01,940 Oh! 346 00:14:01,942 --> 00:14:04,142 -Yes. -[cash register dings] 347 00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:06,211 You want more? Here you go. 348 00:14:06,213 --> 00:14:07,613 [chuckles] thanks! 349 00:14:07,615 --> 00:14:09,014 Have a good one, bro! 350 00:14:09,016 --> 00:14:10,682 -Bro! -Bro! 351 00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:11,749 -Bro! -Bro! 352 00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:14,886 -Bro! -Bro! 353 00:14:14,888 --> 00:14:18,556 ♪ and you can be a bro if you wanna be one! ♪ 354 00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:21,226 ♪ I can be a bro? I don't understand! ♪ 355 00:14:21,228 --> 00:14:22,894 ♪ girl, there's all kinds of bros ♪ 356 00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:24,762 ♪ all across the bro land! ♪ 357 00:14:24,764 --> 00:14:25,831 ♪ bro, bro ♪ 358 00:14:25,833 --> 00:14:27,833 ♪ all across the bro land! ♪ 359 00:14:27,835 --> 00:14:29,234 ♪ host talk shows can be bros ♪ 360 00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:30,902 [bird politician] ♪ men who shove, men who reign ♪ 361 00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:32,370 ♪ men unloved, men ordained ♪ 362 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:37,175 [dirk] ♪ a bro's a shmoe who can do anything! ♪ 363 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:39,511 [h.R. Lady] ♪ or you could be a simple sweetie ♪ 364 00:14:39,513 --> 00:14:41,246 ♪ and still uphold the patriarchy! ♪ 365 00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:43,849 [all the bros] ♪ we live life, free of strife ♪ 366 00:14:43,851 --> 00:14:47,453 ♪ if bros don't like their wages they can just ask for raises! ♪ 367 00:14:47,455 --> 00:14:48,987 ♪ now she's got it! ♪ 368 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:50,989 But being a bro isn't always easy. 369 00:14:50,991 --> 00:14:52,524 It's not? 370 00:14:52,526 --> 00:14:55,060 ♪ despite my status wealth and age ♪ 371 00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:58,330 ♪ I'm still a bitter ball of rage! ♪ 372 00:14:58,332 --> 00:15:01,467 ♪ why are all my jokes so sexist? ♪ 373 00:15:01,469 --> 00:15:04,602 ♪ out in public, I'm a leftist ♪ 374 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:07,605 ♪ my dad told me boys don't cry ♪ 375 00:15:07,607 --> 00:15:10,742 ♪ so I keep my eye-holes dry ♪ 376 00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:15,748 ♪ feel sad when drunk and don't know why ♪ 377 00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:21,019 ♪ but enough pity parties I'm sick of despair! ♪ 378 00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:23,889 ♪ why don't we all look at that chick over there? ♪ 379 00:15:23,891 --> 00:15:27,493 [kyle] ♪ look at her so sweet and happy! ♪ 380 00:15:27,495 --> 00:15:30,496 ♪ she must be why you feel so crappy! ♪ 381 00:15:30,498 --> 00:15:33,699 ♪ oh, I don't know my head is spinning! ♪ 382 00:15:33,701 --> 00:15:37,369 ♪ if she's not losing then you aren't winning! ♪ 383 00:15:37,371 --> 00:15:40,038 ♪ boys, line up! ♪ 384 00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:44,042 [all spitting] 385 00:15:44,044 --> 00:15:47,645 ♪ you can kick down any doors! ♪ 386 00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:51,583 ♪ you gotta fight and win your wars! ♪ 387 00:15:51,585 --> 00:15:55,387 ♪ be a bro and get what's yours! ♪ 388 00:15:55,389 --> 00:15:57,856 So, you work here long, beautiful? 389 00:15:57,858 --> 00:15:59,191 How can I help you today? 390 00:15:59,193 --> 00:16:00,859 I must make a simple choice. 391 00:16:00,861 --> 00:16:02,928 [bertie] to become someone who says noice. 392 00:16:02,930 --> 00:16:05,330 I'll wear the pants of the cargo. 393 00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:07,399 I'll be a bird who is a... 394 00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:11,603 [all the bros] ♪ she'll be a bird who is a... ♪ 395 00:16:11,605 --> 00:16:14,072 - ♪ bro ♪ -[phone buzzes] 396 00:16:14,074 --> 00:16:15,807 -One moment. -[phone beeps] 397 00:16:15,809 --> 00:16:17,275 Hi, pastry pete. 398 00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:19,411 Yeah, I know sales are down today, 399 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:22,080 But, but it's not my... Okay. 400 00:16:22,082 --> 00:16:23,815 Bye. [sighs] 401 00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:25,483 Aw, what's wrong? 402 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,553 You look prettier when you smile. 403 00:16:27,555 --> 00:16:29,755 [groans, yelps] 404 00:16:29,757 --> 00:16:31,423 [tense music] 405 00:16:31,425 --> 00:16:33,825 -[grunts] -bro! 406 00:16:33,827 --> 00:16:35,361 -Bro! -[groans] 407 00:16:35,363 --> 00:16:36,828 [grunts] 408 00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:38,897 [people clamoring] 409 00:16:38,899 --> 00:16:41,233 -[whistle blows] -only red cars! 410 00:16:41,235 --> 00:16:43,301 Now only black cars. 411 00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:45,103 No silver sedans shall pass today, 412 00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:46,304 Find a new route! 413 00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:48,039 -[whistle blows] -hey, you! 414 00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:49,441 That truck is a Sunday truck! 415 00:16:49,443 --> 00:16:50,508 What's a Sunday truck? 416 00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:54,112 That truck is a Sunday truck! 417 00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:55,781 It's Thursday, you silly bitch! 418 00:16:55,783 --> 00:16:56,714 Oh, no! 419 00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:58,183 It's Thursday, you silly bitch! 420 00:16:58,185 --> 00:16:59,717 They'll disown me! 421 00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:00,919 Ah! 422 00:17:00,921 --> 00:17:02,921 -[ducks quack] -[whistle blows] 423 00:17:02,923 --> 00:17:04,590 You! Waddle faster! 424 00:17:04,592 --> 00:17:07,192 Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! 425 00:17:07,194 --> 00:17:09,327 -[quacking] -[grunts] 426 00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,063 Whoa! 427 00:17:11,065 --> 00:17:13,131 You. You. Bumper cars. 428 00:17:13,133 --> 00:17:14,066 -[whistle blows] -let's see it! 429 00:17:14,068 --> 00:17:15,467 [crashes] 430 00:17:16,203 --> 00:17:18,069 [laughing] 431 00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:19,337 -[horn honks] -ew! 432 00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:20,738 You're mad with power! 433 00:17:20,740 --> 00:17:23,475 [laughing] 434 00:17:23,477 --> 00:17:25,677 I'll be right back, I'm just gonna go get lunch. 435 00:17:25,679 --> 00:17:28,013 [laughs maniacally] 436 00:17:28,015 --> 00:17:30,482 [upbeat music] 437 00:17:30,484 --> 00:17:32,818 What an amazing lunch break! [gulps] 438 00:17:32,820 --> 00:17:34,486 Now to resume my duties as... 439 00:17:34,488 --> 00:17:35,553 Aah! 440 00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:36,688 What the dick is this? 441 00:17:36,690 --> 00:17:39,825 Ah, the stop signs the city ordered finally arrived. 442 00:17:39,827 --> 00:17:42,828 Turns out there was an issue with the new guy they hired down 443 00:17:42,830 --> 00:17:44,362 At the sign factory. 444 00:17:44,364 --> 00:17:46,231 Dear automobilist, 445 00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:48,166 You are hereby mandated 446 00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:50,101 To discontinue the generation 447 00:17:50,103 --> 00:17:52,370 Of forward motion vis-a-vis 448 00:17:52,372 --> 00:17:55,307 Your motorized carriage expeditiously! 449 00:17:58,312 --> 00:18:00,178 [sighs] this passionless 450 00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:01,647 Yet graceful stop sign 451 00:18:01,649 --> 00:18:03,915 Does a better civic duty than I ever could. 452 00:18:03,917 --> 00:18:05,050 For now. 453 00:18:05,052 --> 00:18:07,453 Does a better civic duty than I ever could. 454 00:18:07,455 --> 00:18:09,587 Won't go mad with power too. 455 00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:10,989 I see you, stop sign! 456 00:18:10,991 --> 00:18:13,592 [ominous music] 457 00:18:16,130 --> 00:18:19,898 [people clamoring] 458 00:18:21,802 --> 00:18:23,736 [crunches, spits] 459 00:18:25,339 --> 00:18:26,572 [squelches] 460 00:18:29,009 --> 00:18:30,408 Eep! Stop! 461 00:18:30,410 --> 00:18:32,878 Trust me, you do not want to sell those! 462 00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:34,213 Back off, bitch! 463 00:18:35,549 --> 00:18:37,750 Whoa, these taste extra gloopy! 464 00:18:38,486 --> 00:18:41,619 Ew. Loogie strudels! 465 00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:43,288 -[fire crackles] -[gasps] 466 00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:45,557 I'm a pyromania bro! 467 00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:47,025 [laughs] 468 00:18:47,027 --> 00:18:48,160 -Hey, bertie. -[gasps] 469 00:18:48,162 --> 00:18:49,695 I came to check out your new cart. 470 00:18:49,697 --> 00:18:53,765 Oh, you've taken it in a really interesting direction 471 00:18:53,767 --> 00:18:55,501 And you have my full support. 472 00:18:55,503 --> 00:18:59,371 No, tuca. This is bad! Really bad! I need help! 473 00:18:59,373 --> 00:19:01,306 [people clamoring] 474 00:19:01,308 --> 00:19:03,842 Hmm. If I use my traffic cop skills, 475 00:19:03,844 --> 00:19:07,312 Will I once again be consumed by my own lust for power? 476 00:19:07,314 --> 00:19:09,915 Or can I channel it for the benefit of society? 477 00:19:09,917 --> 00:19:12,984 Is that not the lie all dictators tell themselves 478 00:19:12,986 --> 00:19:15,120 As they begin their dark journey towards-- ow! 479 00:19:15,122 --> 00:19:17,823 -Hard nope! -[whistle blows] 480 00:19:19,059 --> 00:19:21,793 [whistle blowing] 481 00:19:21,795 --> 00:19:23,995 [whistle blowing continues] 482 00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:26,365 [upbeat music] 483 00:19:30,204 --> 00:19:31,336 [loud splat] 484 00:19:31,338 --> 00:19:35,073 Bro, gentle. Gentle. 485 00:19:35,075 --> 00:19:38,009 [ducks quacking] 486 00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:40,345 Wow! How did you do that? 487 00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:41,547 I'm fluent in bro! 488 00:19:41,549 --> 00:19:42,680 I took a night class. 489 00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:46,752 Now, shush, this is just gonna hurt for a moment. 490 00:19:46,754 --> 00:19:49,020 [whistle blowing] 491 00:19:49,022 --> 00:19:51,657 -[grunting] -[yelps] 492 00:19:52,226 --> 00:19:53,325 [exhales] 493 00:19:53,961 --> 00:19:55,928 [fire crackling] 494 00:19:59,499 --> 00:20:02,167 [sadly whistles] 495 00:20:02,169 --> 00:20:03,101 You gonna rebuild your cart? 496 00:20:03,103 --> 00:20:06,972 [sadly whistles] 497 00:20:06,974 --> 00:20:10,175 I think integrity is more important to me than crushing. 498 00:20:10,177 --> 00:20:11,577 You're too sensitive to handle 499 00:20:11,579 --> 00:20:13,379 That much lime green graphic design. 500 00:20:13,381 --> 00:20:16,448 Bro taste is truly ass gross. 501 00:20:16,450 --> 00:20:20,252 Just super, duper, ass gross. 502 00:20:20,254 --> 00:20:21,587 Mm-hm. 503 00:20:21,589 --> 00:20:23,389 [spray hisses] 504 00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:27,659 [breathes deeply] 505 00:20:29,129 --> 00:20:31,196 Holland. I'm coming clean. 506 00:20:31,198 --> 00:20:32,397 [exhales] 507 00:20:32,399 --> 00:20:33,665 I've been secretly selling pastries 508 00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:35,667 Around the office as a side business. 509 00:20:35,669 --> 00:20:37,469 I understand if you need me to resign. 510 00:20:37,471 --> 00:20:39,404 -Well, that's all right. -It is? 511 00:20:39,406 --> 00:20:40,806 Everyone has a side hustle, bertie. 512 00:20:40,808 --> 00:20:42,740 I spend hours every workday 513 00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:44,542 Making cuckoo clock wristwatches. 514 00:20:44,544 --> 00:20:46,678 [cuckoo bird] side gig! Side gig! 515 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:47,879 I just had an idea. 516 00:20:47,881 --> 00:20:51,416 What if I baked all our employee birthday cakes? 517 00:20:51,418 --> 00:20:53,551 You could pay me from the office party budget. 518 00:20:53,553 --> 00:20:54,620 Bloody good idea, bertie. 519 00:20:54,622 --> 00:20:56,354 Next Monday is dirk's birthday! 520 00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:58,690 Oh! Uh... 521 00:20:58,692 --> 00:21:00,626 He asked for a cake in the shape of a football 522 00:21:00,628 --> 00:21:03,062 With the words, "you are loved." 523 00:21:05,032 --> 00:21:05,964 [sighs] 524 00:21:05,966 --> 00:21:08,834 Dirk, you are loved. You are loved. 525 00:21:08,836 --> 00:21:11,569 Your mommy and daddy are very proud of you, little dirky. 526 00:21:11,571 --> 00:21:12,971 You got it! 527 00:21:13,641 --> 00:21:15,574 [upbeat music] 528 00:21:17,311 --> 00:21:19,845 -[sighs] -[kyle groans] 529 00:21:19,847 --> 00:21:21,313 What's up, kyle? 530 00:21:21,315 --> 00:21:23,449 So bored. 531 00:21:23,451 --> 00:21:24,782 What should I do now? 532 00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:26,151 Hmm. 533 00:21:27,254 --> 00:21:29,120 There you go, bro. 534 00:21:29,122 --> 00:21:30,422 Aw, sick! 535 00:21:33,593 --> 00:21:36,595 [loud thudding in distance] 536 00:21:38,466 --> 00:21:40,966 [upbeat music] 537 00:22:09,429 --> 00:22:11,096 I don't know what it is, doc. 538 00:22:11,098 --> 00:22:14,432 I feel like I fail at everything I try 539 00:22:14,434 --> 00:22:17,369 And I just wanna be good at something. 540 00:22:17,371 --> 00:22:18,370 Oh! 541 00:22:18,372 --> 00:22:19,637 [laughter] 542 00:22:19,639 --> 00:22:21,106 [fire crackles]