1 00:00:01,268 --> 00:00:02,667 - You guys are useless. What are you even doing? 2 00:00:02,803 --> 00:00:04,402 - I'd like to see you do something for once. 3 00:00:04,404 --> 00:00:06,538 - What, are you scared? - All right, here we go. 4 00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:08,540 - What's going on, shit face? - Eat a dick, penisi. 5 00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:10,475 - Hey, check yourself, polonsky. 6 00:00:10,477 --> 00:00:13,278 - Check yourself, crystal. - All right, all right. 7 00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:14,413 Jerry. - Terry. 8 00:00:14,548 --> 00:00:15,748 - Nice to see you. - You as well. 9 00:00:15,882 --> 00:00:17,215 What brings you out? 10 00:00:17,351 --> 00:00:18,883 - Looks like we have a jurisdictional problem. 11 00:00:18,885 --> 00:00:21,286 - Yeah, he wants us to take care of these guys, 12 00:00:21,421 --> 00:00:23,221 But they're his problem, not ours. 13 00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:24,222 - Drunks, huh? - Yep. 14 00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:25,557 - Looks like a police problem. 15 00:00:25,692 --> 00:00:27,159 - Exactly. - What's with the wet pants? 16 00:00:27,294 --> 00:00:29,294 - The wet your pants challenge, bitch! 17 00:00:29,429 --> 00:00:30,763 [laughter] - he called you a bitch! 18 00:00:30,897 --> 00:00:32,431 [laughter] - what's that supposed to mean? 19 00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:34,767 - What, you never heard of it, chief queef? 20 00:00:34,901 --> 00:00:37,902 [chuckles] step one, you piss your pants. 21 00:00:37,904 --> 00:00:40,705 Step two, film it. [laughs] 22 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,374 - It's a new social media craze. 23 00:00:42,509 --> 00:00:44,176 You piss yourself in an unexpected place and film it. 24 00:00:44,311 --> 00:00:45,644 All the influencers are doing it. 25 00:00:45,646 --> 00:00:47,312 - Kylie jenner pissed her yoga pants 26 00:00:47,447 --> 00:00:49,648 At london bridge last week. Broke the internet. 27 00:00:49,650 --> 00:00:51,916 - It was pretty dope. - Have you done it? 28 00:00:52,052 --> 00:00:53,718 - I'd rather not say. 29 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:57,189 - We wet ourselves five times at the tacoma terriers game 30 00:00:57,324 --> 00:01:00,392 And three times just now. [laughter] 31 00:01:00,527 --> 00:01:02,060 - They are not getting in my ambulance. 32 00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:03,395 - Yeah, they are. - Yeah, they are. 33 00:01:03,530 --> 00:01:05,063 - Public intoxication, graffiti, 34 00:01:05,199 --> 00:01:06,598 Vandalism--take 'em to jail. 35 00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:10,669 - Well, I'm sorry to have to play this card, but... 36 00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,537 Guys... 37 00:01:12,673 --> 00:01:13,872 I'm gonna have to take you to jail. 38 00:01:14,008 --> 00:01:15,340 - Thank you. 39 00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:17,209 - For doing the wet your pants challenge? 40 00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:19,544 Be cool, brah. Social meeds. 41 00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:21,946 - Or you could tell these firefighters 42 00:01:21,948 --> 00:01:24,148 About your chest pain. 43 00:01:24,150 --> 00:01:25,417 - I don't have chest pain. 44 00:01:25,552 --> 00:01:27,085 - Or you can tell these firefighters 45 00:01:27,221 --> 00:01:29,554 About your chest pain, and legally, 46 00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:32,825 They have to take you to the er instead of jail. 47 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:34,092 - No, no. 48 00:01:34,228 --> 00:01:35,227 Both: We have chest pain! 49 00:01:35,362 --> 00:01:36,561 Ah, my chest! 50 00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:38,697 - Oh! - Ow, my chest! 51 00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:40,499 - Yeah! - You heard it. 52 00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:44,236 Chest pains, or as I call it, incarceritis. 53 00:01:44,371 --> 00:01:45,770 - No, no chance. We're not taking these guys. 54 00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:47,639 Absolutely not. - Nope, he's right. 55 00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:49,041 We gotta take 'em. Load 'em up. 56 00:01:49,176 --> 00:01:50,642 - Are you kidding me? Come on. 57 00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:52,444 - We have no choice. Those are the rules. 58 00:01:52,579 --> 00:01:54,446 Load 'em up. - Chief. 59 00:01:54,581 --> 00:01:56,248 - All right, granny. - Cap. 60 00:01:56,383 --> 00:01:57,649 - Might want to put on a life jacket 61 00:01:57,784 --> 00:01:59,451 For the waterworks. [laughs] 62 00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:01,386 - And by water, he means piss. 63 00:02:01,388 --> 00:02:02,721 - Yeah. - Oh, really? 64 00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:05,390 - Wait, wait, wait, take a video of me 65 00:02:05,392 --> 00:02:07,926 Wetting myself in the ambulance. 66 00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:09,662 - No, I just cleaned that ambulance out. 67 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:12,597 No. - Hey, you mind? Just one. 68 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:14,132 - Come on. - Want it vertical. 69 00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:16,601 - Oh, shit. - Ah, my phone's all wet! 70 00:02:16,603 --> 00:02:19,071 [laughs] - come on, let's go. Hurry up. 71 00:02:19,206 --> 00:02:21,273 [both imitating sirens] 72 00:02:21,408 --> 00:02:24,276 [foreigner's "hot blooded"] 73 00:02:24,411 --> 00:02:29,748 ♪ ♪ 74 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:32,617 - ♪ well, I'm hot-blooded ♪ 75 00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:35,220 ♪ check it and see ♪ 76 00:02:35,222 --> 00:02:38,623 ♪ I got a fever of 103 ♪ 77 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:40,559 ♪ I'm hot-blooded ♪ 78 00:02:42,696 --> 00:02:45,029 [slamming gavel] 79 00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:46,364 - Hear ye, hear ye, 80 00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:48,300 This kangaroo court is now in session. 81 00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:50,635 Let justice be served for the crimes committed 82 00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:53,438 Within these walls, may they be real or perceived. 83 00:02:53,574 --> 00:02:55,440 - Mm, good word, your honor. 84 00:02:55,442 --> 00:02:56,909 - [chuckles] thank you very much, bailiff. 85 00:02:57,043 --> 00:02:59,444 - My first kangaroo court. I'm a little nervous. 86 00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:01,045 - Eh, don't worry about it, probie. 87 00:03:01,047 --> 00:03:03,715 It's all in good fun. Nobody takes it too seriously. 88 00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,517 - Bailiff, you may call the first case. 89 00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:08,052 - All right, your honor, the court of station 24 90 00:03:08,054 --> 00:03:10,122 Recognizes lucy mcconky. 91 00:03:10,257 --> 00:03:12,657 - Aha. 92 00:03:12,659 --> 00:03:16,461 - Your honor, theft is a heinous crime, 93 00:03:16,597 --> 00:03:18,397 And no thievery is lower 94 00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,199 Than firefighter on firefighter theft. 95 00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:22,667 - Mm. - You can say that again. 96 00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:23,736 - Deplorable. 97 00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:26,070 - As someone who enjoys looking "noice," 98 00:03:26,072 --> 00:03:29,474 I recently bought a very expensive bottle 99 00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:32,076 Of shampoo to add extra body to my hair. 100 00:03:32,078 --> 00:03:35,614 Someone in this station has been stealing 101 00:03:35,616 --> 00:03:37,882 That very expensive shampoo. 102 00:03:38,018 --> 00:03:40,352 Your honor, I bring before the court 103 00:03:40,487 --> 00:03:44,823 The case of the people versus ike crystal! 104 00:03:44,959 --> 00:03:47,760 [dramatic music] 105 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:51,029 Both: Murmur, murmur, murmur, murmur. 106 00:03:51,031 --> 00:03:54,433 - Your honor, two weeks ago, I bought this bottle 107 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:57,302 Of maurice pasqual extra volumizing 108 00:03:57,304 --> 00:04:01,840 Ultra full body shampoo for $189.99. 109 00:04:01,976 --> 00:04:04,643 - $189? For shampoo? 110 00:04:04,779 --> 00:04:06,645 - May I remind you that you're the judge right now 111 00:04:06,781 --> 00:04:08,647 And not my father? - Yeah, but that's crazy. 112 00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:10,048 - [chuckles] - what's in that thing, gold? 113 00:04:10,184 --> 00:04:11,916 - Well, it's pretty common for high-end shampoo 114 00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:13,852 These days, your honor. - Is that right, bailiff? 115 00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:16,655 - Indeed, and that right there is the low end of the high end. 116 00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:19,191 - Shut the front door! Maybe I am crazy. 117 00:04:19,326 --> 00:04:20,925 - No, no, you're not crazy. 118 00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:22,394 - Thank you for your shampoo expertise, bailiff. 119 00:04:22,529 --> 00:04:23,862 - Well, I appreciate your appreciation 120 00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:25,864 Of my expertise. [both chuckle] 121 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:29,134 - As you might note, the bottle is almost empty. 122 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,469 [bottle rattles] 123 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,204 - Inspect that, bailiff. - Yes, sir. 124 00:04:32,339 --> 00:04:33,806 [bottle rattles] 125 00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:35,407 Yep, that's empty. - I thought the same thing. 126 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:36,475 - Mm-hmm. 127 00:04:36,477 --> 00:04:37,876 - Ike asked me to use it, 128 00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:40,212 And I declined given its lofty price. 129 00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:44,416 Soon, the levels began to lower and his hair became fluffier. 130 00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:46,551 - Objection. Circumstantial. 131 00:04:46,687 --> 00:04:48,620 - Sustained. Very good, ike. 132 00:04:48,755 --> 00:04:50,355 That's good legalese. - Yeah! 133 00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:51,623 - Murmur, murmur, murmur. - Murmur, murmur. 134 00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:53,692 - Your honor, I would like to call 135 00:04:53,694 --> 00:04:55,427 To the stand an expert witness, 136 00:04:55,562 --> 00:04:57,629 Andres mickleberry! 137 00:04:57,764 --> 00:04:59,364 [upbeat rock music] 138 00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:01,233 Mickleberry, are you familiar 139 00:05:01,368 --> 00:05:03,435 With maurice pasqual extra volumizing 140 00:05:03,570 --> 00:05:04,969 Ultra full body shampoo? 141 00:05:05,105 --> 00:05:07,572 - I am. My mom uses it. It smells like home. 142 00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:09,307 - Mickleberry, will you smell ike's hair 143 00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:10,775 And tell me what it smells like? 144 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,444 - I don't think we need to do that, your honor. 145 00:05:12,579 --> 00:05:14,013 - I'll allow it. - Mm. 146 00:05:15,582 --> 00:05:17,916 - [sniffs deeply] 147 00:05:18,052 --> 00:05:19,984 Ah, dios mío. 148 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:23,388 Maurice pasqual. I'd bet my life on it. 149 00:05:23,524 --> 00:05:25,590 - Objection! Uh, speculation. 150 00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,592 - He is an expert witness. Overruled. 151 00:05:27,594 --> 00:05:28,861 - [chuckles] he is an expert. 152 00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,395 - Yeah. - Good call, your honor. 153 00:05:30,531 --> 00:05:31,996 He had his nose in that thing 154 00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,798 Like it was another dog's ass. - [laughs] 155 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:36,268 - Yes, I think he could smell what he was thinking. 156 00:05:36,403 --> 00:05:38,603 [both laugh] 157 00:05:38,739 --> 00:05:42,807 - And, your honor, I actually saw ike use the shampoo. 158 00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:44,809 - What? - Murmur, murmur. 159 00:05:44,811 --> 00:05:47,812 Both: Murmur, murmur, murmur, murmur. 160 00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:49,681 - We were showering after a call 161 00:05:49,816 --> 00:05:51,816 When ike mentioned his dry hair. 162 00:05:51,818 --> 00:05:55,888 - Ugh, these fires make my hair so thin and flat and dry! 163 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,022 Does that happen to you? - Not really. 164 00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,224 [bottle whistles] 165 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,426 - Thanks a lot, obama. 166 00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,629 ♪ ♪ 167 00:06:04,631 --> 00:06:08,633 Oh, hello, you. [laughs] 168 00:06:08,635 --> 00:06:09,768 - Ike, don't! That's lucy's. 169 00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,436 - Yeah, no shit it's lucy's. 170 00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:13,638 Chick shampoo fucking rules. 171 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:15,039 - You shouldn't steal from other people. 172 00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:16,374 - It's fine. Don't worry about it. 173 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,910 I do this all the time. 174 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,644 "ike, that's not yours. That's lucy's." 175 00:06:19,780 --> 00:06:21,780 Shut up, bro! God. 176 00:06:21,916 --> 00:06:23,782 - I think that stuff is really expensive. 177 00:06:23,784 --> 00:06:25,450 - By the way, if you say anything about this, 178 00:06:25,452 --> 00:06:27,119 I'm gonna waste you, bro. 179 00:06:27,254 --> 00:06:28,653 Snap, crackle, pop! 180 00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:30,989 - Murmur, murmur. - Murmur, murmur, murmur. 181 00:06:31,125 --> 00:06:32,725 - Ugh, how do we know he didn't do it? 182 00:06:32,859 --> 00:06:34,393 He probably used it. Look at his wavy, curly hair. 183 00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:36,528 Look at how wavy it is. - I have naturally curly hair. 184 00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:39,531 - Your honor, we know it wasn't mickleberry. 185 00:06:39,666 --> 00:06:40,933 - And how do we know that? 186 00:06:41,067 --> 00:06:42,400 - Because mickleberry is allergic 187 00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:44,402 To maurice pasqual shampoo! 188 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:45,604 - It's true. 189 00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:47,139 I'm allergic to the cleansing agent 190 00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:50,275 In maurice pasqual, cocamidopropyl betaine. 191 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:51,944 It irritates my skin. 192 00:06:52,079 --> 00:06:53,979 Here's a note from my mother stating such. 193 00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:56,681 - Bailiff, enter that into evidence. 194 00:06:56,817 --> 00:06:58,817 - Entering to evidence, your honor. 195 00:06:58,819 --> 00:07:00,819 "my son is allergic to the cleansing agent 196 00:07:00,821 --> 00:07:04,823 "cocamidopropyl betaine in maurice pasqual shampoo. 197 00:07:04,959 --> 00:07:07,960 Maria mickleberry." looks legit, your honor. 198 00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:09,361 - It does look legit. 199 00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:10,895 All right. [slams gavel] 200 00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,898 This court is ready to rule. - Judge ruling. 201 00:07:14,034 --> 00:07:18,503 - I hereby find ike crystal guilty of the crime of theft. 202 00:07:18,639 --> 00:07:19,704 - What? 203 00:07:19,706 --> 00:07:20,973 - I sentence you to reimburse 204 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:25,310 Lucy mcconky $189.99 using the cashmo app. 205 00:07:25,312 --> 00:07:27,112 - Wait, whoa, whoa, that's a lot of money! 206 00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:29,114 - Furthermore, upon recess of this court, 207 00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:31,183 I order you to wash that shampoo 208 00:07:31,318 --> 00:07:34,519 Right out of your hair, and I also ban you 209 00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,454 From using any volumizing shampoo 210 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:37,922 For one month. - Yes. 211 00:07:38,058 --> 00:07:39,724 - What? I need to volumize. 212 00:07:39,726 --> 00:07:40,859 I'm gonna look ridiculous. 213 00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:42,527 [slams gavel] - next case. 214 00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:43,862 [alarm blaring] - alarm, engine 24. 215 00:07:43,998 --> 00:07:46,064 Rescue 42, respond to unknown odor. 216 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:49,001 - Okay, this court is adjourned until the crew returns. 217 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,536 Thank you very much, everybody. That was fun. 218 00:07:51,672 --> 00:07:54,072 ♪ ♪ 219 00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:55,140 [slamming gavel] 220 00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:56,541 Hear ye, hear ye, 221 00:07:56,677 --> 00:07:58,543 This kangaroo court is back in session. 222 00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:00,813 - Kangaroo court sucks. - You suck. 223 00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:02,147 - You suck. - You suck. 224 00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:04,149 - And the court will now recognize 225 00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:06,218 Captain edward penisi jr. 226 00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:08,620 [smooth guitar riff] - ♪ eddie ♪ 227 00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:10,355 - Your honor... 228 00:08:10,491 --> 00:08:15,093 We can all agree that treason is a most heinous crime. 229 00:08:15,229 --> 00:08:17,229 - Oh, very heinous. Isn't that right, bailiff? 230 00:08:17,364 --> 00:08:18,497 - Most heinous crime I know. 231 00:08:18,632 --> 00:08:20,098 - And if we sit by 232 00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:21,900 While acts of treason are committed, 233 00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:24,969 Are we not ourselves traitors? - We are traitors. 234 00:08:24,971 --> 00:08:26,971 Isn't that right, bailiff? - Dirty dogs. 235 00:08:26,973 --> 00:08:29,041 - It is with this weighing on my heart 236 00:08:29,176 --> 00:08:33,311 That I accuse chief terry mcconky of treason. 237 00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:36,181 - Murmur, murmur. - Murmur, murmur, major murmur. 238 00:08:36,316 --> 00:08:37,382 - What? How? 239 00:08:37,518 --> 00:08:38,783 - I am accusing you 240 00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:41,253 Of being friends with the enemy, 241 00:08:41,388 --> 00:08:43,055 Police captain jerry polonsky. 242 00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:44,789 - Murmur, murmur. - Oh, shit, murmur, murmur. 243 00:08:44,925 --> 00:08:46,991 - Oh. - Murmur, baby, murmur. 244 00:08:47,127 --> 00:08:50,395 - That's ridiculous. Me friends with polonsky? 245 00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:51,663 I can't wait to hear this one. 246 00:08:51,798 --> 00:08:53,131 - If it pleases the court, 247 00:08:53,133 --> 00:08:55,934 The prosecution will now present its case. 248 00:08:55,936 --> 00:08:57,469 - It pleases the court. Isn't that right, bailiff? 249 00:08:57,604 --> 00:08:58,803 - Oh, from the rootie to the tootie. 250 00:08:58,939 --> 00:09:00,239 - This'll be good. 251 00:09:02,676 --> 00:09:03,909 [slams gavel] 252 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,978 - Oh, ye, oh, ye. Court is in session. 253 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,515 The honorable bailiff granfield smith 254 00:09:09,649 --> 00:09:10,982 Will now preside over the case 255 00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:13,118 Of the people versus terry mcconky. 256 00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:14,052 Counselor. 257 00:09:14,188 --> 00:09:16,722 - Chief mcconky, you stand accused 258 00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:19,191 Of being friends with captain jerry polonsky. 259 00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:20,926 - Oh, boy, this is gonna be a classic. 260 00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,994 - Oh, yeah. - Okay, go ahead. 261 00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:24,996 - Terry, today I am going to prove 262 00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:27,265 That the two of you have a wealth of things in common, 263 00:09:27,401 --> 00:09:30,536 And that that has lead you to become secret close friends. 264 00:09:30,670 --> 00:09:32,003 - [laughs] come on. 265 00:09:32,139 --> 00:09:34,139 He's a redhead. They smell like mothballs. 266 00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:35,473 I mean, give me a break. 267 00:09:35,609 --> 00:09:36,542 Why would I be friends with that? 268 00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:37,809 - Mm-hmm, indeed. 269 00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:39,077 The other day, 270 00:09:39,213 --> 00:09:40,879 When we greeted the cops with insults 271 00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:42,814 At the incarceritis imbroglio, 272 00:09:42,950 --> 00:09:46,352 You not only greeted polonsky with a very friendly, 273 00:09:46,486 --> 00:09:50,088 "nice to see you," but you also sided with him 274 00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:52,758 Against the tfd, did you not? 275 00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:54,960 - Murmur, murmur. - Murmur, murmur, murmur. 276 00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:57,429 - Okay, that's what this is about? 277 00:09:57,431 --> 00:09:59,164 Great. All right. Let's do it. 278 00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:01,233 - Terry, would you state for me the name 279 00:10:01,235 --> 00:10:03,435 Of your favorite country and western 280 00:10:03,437 --> 00:10:04,903 Music recording artist please? 281 00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:06,838 - Well, I think we all know it's leigh weigh. 282 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:08,840 - And did you not attend the leigh weigh concert 283 00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:10,708 Last month on the 29th? 284 00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:12,378 - You freaking know I did. 285 00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:14,512 They closed with "fresh cut grass 286 00:10:14,514 --> 00:10:15,914 And a piece o' ass." 287 00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:18,984 Nobody left. - Your honor, exhibit a. 288 00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,452 - Oh, great, you're a tech guy now? 289 00:10:20,588 --> 00:10:23,121 - This photo was posted to jerry polonsky's 290 00:10:23,257 --> 00:10:26,658 Boi-oi-oing page the morning after the leigh weigh concert. 291 00:10:26,660 --> 00:10:28,727 - So what? He's a weigh watcher. 292 00:10:28,862 --> 00:10:29,928 Maybe I should be friends with him. 293 00:10:30,063 --> 00:10:31,397 - But hold on one second. 294 00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:33,331 I think you were there together. 295 00:10:33,467 --> 00:10:34,866 [laughter] 296 00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:36,734 - Oh, murmur, murmur. - Murmur, murmur, murmur. 297 00:10:36,736 --> 00:10:38,136 - It's a good one. - Whoo! 298 00:10:38,272 --> 00:10:39,738 - Yeah, I went straight from work. 299 00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:41,473 - Chief mcconky, do you recall that, 300 00:10:41,609 --> 00:10:43,875 At our most recent charity auction, 301 00:10:43,877 --> 00:10:45,611 There were two unclaimed tickets 302 00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:47,413 To the bonney lake arts & crafts fair? 303 00:10:47,547 --> 00:10:49,681 - Can't say that I do. - Hm, that's very interesting, 304 00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:50,882 Considering that those two tickets 305 00:10:51,018 --> 00:10:52,350 Were pinned to the bulletin board 306 00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:53,685 Outside of your office for some time 307 00:10:53,687 --> 00:10:55,020 Until they went missing. 308 00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:57,689 - Objection, your honor. Who gives a shit? 309 00:10:57,691 --> 00:10:59,357 [laughter] 310 00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:01,827 - Counselor, you better be going someplace with this. 311 00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:03,228 - Oh, I am, your honor. I am. 312 00:11:03,363 --> 00:11:05,897 Your honor, the bonney lake arts & crafts fair 313 00:11:06,033 --> 00:11:08,166 Was on Saturday the 2nd of this month. 314 00:11:08,302 --> 00:11:11,369 Now, the night of the 2nd, chief mcconky was caught 315 00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:14,973 Running a red light camera in the town of bonney lake. 316 00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:16,108 - [gasps] - oh. 317 00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:18,844 - Murmur, murmur. - Okay, so what? 318 00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:20,312 - And how do you know this, counselor? 319 00:11:20,448 --> 00:11:23,515 - I know this because terry showed me 320 00:11:23,517 --> 00:11:24,850 The red light ticket photo. 321 00:11:24,985 --> 00:11:27,052 He thought it was funny. - Big deal. 322 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,987 I think red light photo cameras are funny. 323 00:11:29,122 --> 00:11:30,722 - It's pretty funny. - Yeah. See? 324 00:11:30,858 --> 00:11:32,190 Everyone thinks they're funny. 325 00:11:32,326 --> 00:11:35,060 - The thing we never discussed was the identity 326 00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:38,130 Of this person obscured in the photo 327 00:11:38,132 --> 00:11:39,597 Sitting next to terry in his car. 328 00:11:39,599 --> 00:11:41,799 - It's probably vicky. - You don't recall? 329 00:11:41,801 --> 00:11:43,401 - Probably vicky. 330 00:11:43,403 --> 00:11:45,070 - Lucy, what did terry tell you about that ticket? 331 00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:47,139 - He bragged about how he pulled some strings 332 00:11:47,274 --> 00:11:49,207 To get out of it. - Oh. 333 00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:52,277 Pulled some strings, did he? Well, well, well. 334 00:11:52,412 --> 00:11:55,413 It must be very easy to get out of a traffic ticket 335 00:11:55,415 --> 00:11:58,083 When the passenger in your car is a police captain. 336 00:11:58,218 --> 00:12:01,820 Both: Murmur, murmur, murmur. - Murmur, murmur, murmur. 337 00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:03,755 - Okay, this is stupid, all right? 338 00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:05,623 Now it's getting boring. That was your best joke. 339 00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:06,825 Let's move on now. 340 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,227 - Your honor, I demand a retrial. 341 00:12:09,363 --> 00:12:11,830 I was blatantly framed for that shampoo crime. 342 00:12:11,832 --> 00:12:13,098 I didn't do it. - And if you were framed 343 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,901 For the shampoo, why is your hair so flat now? 344 00:12:16,036 --> 00:12:18,436 - I--stop. I-- 345 00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:21,840 [sighs] look, I request a short recess 346 00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:23,441 So I can get my case in order, please. 347 00:12:23,577 --> 00:12:25,711 - Your case is over. - But I'm innocent, I tell you! 348 00:12:25,846 --> 00:12:27,713 I'm innocent! I was framed! 349 00:12:27,848 --> 00:12:29,715 - Ike, I got the chief on the ropes. 350 00:12:29,850 --> 00:12:31,183 - What? Whatever, "on the ropes." 351 00:12:31,318 --> 00:12:32,851 [alarm blaring] fresh alarm, engine 24... 352 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:34,119 - Okay, roll it out. 353 00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:36,054 - We will resume when we return. 354 00:12:36,056 --> 00:12:37,989 - [laughs] - oh, man. 355 00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:39,457 Did you see his face 356 00:12:39,593 --> 00:12:40,792 When you brought up the red light ticket? 357 00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:42,060 - Hysterical. 358 00:12:42,196 --> 00:12:43,862 Terry has five minutes of fun in him, 359 00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:46,398 And then he gets cranky. - And defensive. 360 00:12:46,534 --> 00:12:49,067 - Yeah, about me saying he's friends with polonsky. 361 00:12:49,203 --> 00:12:50,602 Tell you what I'm gonna do. 362 00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:52,470 When we get back in there, I am gonna hit him 363 00:12:52,472 --> 00:12:54,340 With some really stupid stuff just to piss him off. 364 00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:56,808 - Who is in this photo? - Probably vicky. 365 00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:58,810 - It doesn't really look like her. 366 00:12:58,946 --> 00:13:01,146 I'ma text her. 367 00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:03,815 "were you with dad in the car 368 00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:05,951 When he got the red light ticket?" 369 00:13:06,086 --> 00:13:07,619 - It's gotta be her. 370 00:13:07,621 --> 00:13:09,955 Who else would terry go to an arts & crafts fair with? 371 00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:11,223 - She said "what ticket?" 372 00:13:12,159 --> 00:13:13,959 Guess it's not her. [knock at door] 373 00:13:14,094 --> 00:13:17,363 - Sorry, uh, you know I didn't use the maurice pasqual, right? 374 00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:19,898 - Yes, you did, ike. - No, I didn't, lucy. 375 00:13:20,033 --> 00:13:22,234 - You look like a scarecrow. - Oh, come on. 376 00:13:22,236 --> 00:13:23,569 Okay, maybe I used it once 377 00:13:23,703 --> 00:13:26,504 Because my husky 3-in-1 men's body wash was out. 378 00:13:26,506 --> 00:13:27,439 I used it one time, 379 00:13:27,575 --> 00:13:29,107 But there's no way I used that much. 380 00:13:29,243 --> 00:13:30,442 That's impossible. 381 00:13:30,444 --> 00:13:31,709 Somebody else is using it, okay? 382 00:13:31,845 --> 00:13:32,911 And it wasn't me, lucy, 383 00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:33,979 So stop looking at me like that. 384 00:13:34,114 --> 00:13:35,513 It wasn't--you know what? 385 00:13:35,649 --> 00:13:37,182 I'm gonna find out who, and you can bet your ass 386 00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:38,850 I'm gonna find out, and we're gonna solve it. 387 00:13:38,852 --> 00:13:40,786 - Mickleberry caught you red-handed! 388 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:43,121 - Well, mickleberry is a liar! 389 00:13:43,257 --> 00:13:44,790 - Guys, guys, it's kangaroo court. 390 00:13:44,925 --> 00:13:45,924 It's kangaroo court. Calm down. 391 00:13:46,059 --> 00:13:47,325 - Cap, I'm calm, 392 00:13:47,461 --> 00:13:49,395 But I got robbed in there! This is bullshit! 393 00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:51,463 - Cap, can you kick him out of our private lunch. 394 00:13:51,465 --> 00:13:53,198 - Did you guys go to blobby's without me? 395 00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:54,466 - Yeah, we did. - Awesome. 396 00:13:54,602 --> 00:13:57,135 You know it's my favorite. - [laughs] 397 00:13:57,271 --> 00:13:58,870 [upbeat rock music] 398 00:13:58,872 --> 00:13:59,871 - Blobby's sucks! 399 00:14:00,007 --> 00:14:01,473 ♪ ♪ 400 00:14:01,609 --> 00:14:02,674 [slamming gavel] - oh, ye! 401 00:14:02,810 --> 00:14:04,610 Oh, ye, oh, ye, oh, ye! 402 00:14:04,745 --> 00:14:06,077 We resume the case 403 00:14:06,079 --> 00:14:07,745 Of the people versus chief mcconky. 404 00:14:07,747 --> 00:14:09,415 - Okay, eddie, are we gonna keep going with this? 405 00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:11,617 I thought we got all the laughs out of it, hm? 406 00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:13,351 - Oh, your honor, I would like 407 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,020 To call another witness to the stand. 408 00:14:15,155 --> 00:14:17,889 - Oh. Hey, sorry. You guys having a meeting? 409 00:14:17,891 --> 00:14:19,491 Well, what'd you want, lucy? 410 00:14:19,493 --> 00:14:23,695 - Your honor, the people call viccolina penisi-mcconky. 411 00:14:23,831 --> 00:14:24,963 [dramatic musical sting] 412 00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:27,499 - Oh, no, not kangaroo court again 413 00:14:27,635 --> 00:14:29,501 - Mom, please, just one quick question. 414 00:14:29,637 --> 00:14:31,637 - Yeah, but last time, eddie accused terry 415 00:14:31,771 --> 00:14:33,571 Of wearing spanx, and then-- 416 00:14:33,573 --> 00:14:35,173 Then he tricked me into testifying. 417 00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:36,174 I don't want to do that again. 418 00:14:36,310 --> 00:14:37,643 - I don't wear spanx. 419 00:14:37,778 --> 00:14:38,977 - Okay, let's not talk about it. 420 00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:40,178 - It's super important. 421 00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:41,313 - Five minutes, that's it. 422 00:14:41,315 --> 00:14:43,115 - Mrs. Penisi-mcconky, 423 00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:44,983 Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule 424 00:14:45,118 --> 00:14:47,519 To accommodate us. - Let's get to it, eddie. 425 00:14:47,655 --> 00:14:49,587 - Mrs. Penisi-mcconky, 426 00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:51,990 Do you remember terry going to the leigh weigh concert 427 00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:53,459 Last month? - Of course. 428 00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:55,327 He's still singing that "ass in the grass" song. 429 00:14:55,463 --> 00:14:58,396 - Honey, it's "fresh cut grass and a piece o' ass." 430 00:14:58,398 --> 00:14:59,998 - Yeah, you know what I mean. 431 00:15:00,134 --> 00:15:01,667 - I used to sing that song to you when you rubbed my feet. 432 00:15:01,801 --> 00:15:03,469 - We don't have to tell everybody that. 433 00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:06,271 - Do you remember with whom terry went to the concert? 434 00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,474 - Ike. - Yeah? 435 00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:10,275 Oh, me ike? 436 00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:12,678 No, you're probably thinking of a different guy named ike. 437 00:15:12,812 --> 00:15:14,212 - I actually said mike. 438 00:15:14,214 --> 00:15:15,681 Mike penkenten from the treasurer's office. 439 00:15:15,816 --> 00:15:17,282 - No, you said ike. 440 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,685 - I specifically said mike. Mike penkenten. 441 00:15:19,820 --> 00:15:22,954 - Murmur, murmur, murmur. - No, not--not now. 442 00:15:22,956 --> 00:15:24,690 - Wait, terry, did you lie to me? 443 00:15:24,824 --> 00:15:26,624 - Are you kidding me? Are you falling for this? 444 00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:28,226 This is a joke. 445 00:15:28,228 --> 00:15:30,963 - Vicky, is this you in the car with terry? 446 00:15:32,166 --> 00:15:36,101 - No, this is a man, eddie. - Indeed. Indeed. 447 00:15:36,236 --> 00:15:37,635 - Terry, who did you go to the concert with? 448 00:15:37,637 --> 00:15:40,105 - Mike penkenten! - Who is this in this picture? 449 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:41,373 - It's probably mike penkenten. 450 00:15:41,509 --> 00:15:42,974 - Mike penkenten is not a white guy. 451 00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:44,910 - Okay, joke's over. Come on, all right? 452 00:15:45,045 --> 00:15:46,444 Lookit--she's getting mad at me now. 453 00:15:46,580 --> 00:15:47,979 Are you happy? - All right, counselor. 454 00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:49,314 Where are you going with this? 455 00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:51,183 - Your honor, it is the prosecution's belief 456 00:15:51,185 --> 00:15:53,185 That terry mcconky is secretly attending events 457 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:54,652 With jerry polonsky. 458 00:15:54,788 --> 00:15:56,788 They went to the leigh weigh concert together. 459 00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:59,325 They went to the bonney lake arts & crafts fair together, 460 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:02,660 And if you'd look at these two photos side-by-side, 461 00:16:02,662 --> 00:16:05,397 They reveal that the mystery passenger 462 00:16:05,399 --> 00:16:09,000 In terry's car is none other than his open-mouthed friend 463 00:16:09,136 --> 00:16:10,335 Jerry polonsky. 464 00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,604 - Oh! - Murmur, murmur. 465 00:16:12,740 --> 00:16:13,805 - Murmur, murmur. 466 00:16:13,941 --> 00:16:15,207 - Vicky, this is a joke, okay? 467 00:16:15,209 --> 00:16:16,742 This is a joke, all right? 468 00:16:16,877 --> 00:16:20,011 - Your honor, the prosecution brings to the stand 469 00:16:20,013 --> 00:16:23,148 Police captain gerald mcrainey polonsky. 470 00:16:23,283 --> 00:16:24,416 - Yeah, right. 471 00:16:25,553 --> 00:16:26,752 He's actually here. [chuckles] 472 00:16:26,887 --> 00:16:28,420 - The hell do you want, penisi? 473 00:16:28,422 --> 00:16:29,621 You said there was a crime being committed here. 474 00:16:29,757 --> 00:16:31,890 - There is-- the crime of treason, 475 00:16:31,892 --> 00:16:34,026 And terry mcconky is guilty! 476 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:36,895 All: Murmur, murmur, murmur, murmur, murmur, murmur, murmur. 477 00:16:36,897 --> 00:16:39,164 - Yeah, we don't arrest people for treason. 478 00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:41,467 You need to call the feds. 479 00:16:44,105 --> 00:16:45,504 [upbeat rock music] 480 00:16:45,639 --> 00:16:48,573 - Jerry, would you consider yourself to be friends 481 00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:52,177 With terry mcconky? - Us? Friends? 482 00:16:52,313 --> 00:16:54,245 I'd sooner eat a rat, crap that out, 483 00:16:54,247 --> 00:16:56,982 Eat that, crap that out, feed that to another rat, 484 00:16:56,984 --> 00:16:58,850 And then eat that rat. 485 00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:00,251 - Objection, your honor! 486 00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:02,654 Super gross and mildly confusing. 487 00:17:02,790 --> 00:17:04,189 - Sustained, ike, but this isn't your case. 488 00:17:04,325 --> 00:17:05,524 You can't object. 489 00:17:05,659 --> 00:17:06,725 - Well, now that I've got your attention, 490 00:17:06,860 --> 00:17:08,527 Can I just tell you, I'm innocent! 491 00:17:08,662 --> 00:17:10,529 I paid lucy a lot of money for that shampoo. 492 00:17:10,664 --> 00:17:12,331 A lot of money! - And there it is. 493 00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:14,133 [cash register chimes] thanks, ike. 494 00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:17,002 - Jerry, who did you go to the leigh weigh concert with? 495 00:17:17,004 --> 00:17:18,804 - Joe. - I'm not falling for it. 496 00:17:18,939 --> 00:17:21,072 - Joe mama! Ooh, ooh! 497 00:17:21,208 --> 00:17:23,008 - Oh, joe mama. That was awesome. 498 00:17:23,144 --> 00:17:24,943 Like, joe--joe mama. 499 00:17:25,078 --> 00:17:27,412 It's like a knock-knock joke. Forget it, man. Try to keep up. 500 00:17:27,414 --> 00:17:29,280 - Were you in terry's car 501 00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:31,282 The night he got the red light camera ticket? 502 00:17:31,284 --> 00:17:32,684 - No, that was probably your mom. 503 00:17:32,820 --> 00:17:34,686 - Oh, zing. He got her twice in a row. 504 00:17:34,688 --> 00:17:36,488 - Yeah. - Man, he's vicious. 505 00:17:36,490 --> 00:17:38,157 - I'm sorry, terry, did you want to be friends? 506 00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:40,359 Maybe our kids can date again with the... 507 00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:42,093 [singing, trilling] 508 00:17:42,095 --> 00:17:43,895 - Okay. - Hey. 509 00:17:43,897 --> 00:17:45,697 - That's offensive. - Her mother is here. 510 00:17:45,833 --> 00:17:47,632 - Oh, my god. 511 00:17:47,768 --> 00:17:49,368 Uncle eddie, you gotta see this. 512 00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:52,371 [soft dramatic music] 513 00:17:52,506 --> 00:17:53,638 ♪ ♪ 514 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,374 - [gasps] 515 00:17:55,509 --> 00:17:57,176 - All right, cap, can you wrap this up? 516 00:17:57,310 --> 00:17:58,777 - Not just yet, your honor. 517 00:17:58,912 --> 00:18:01,112 I call terry mcconky back to the stand. 518 00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:03,314 - Okay, eddie, joke's over. All right? Really. 519 00:18:03,316 --> 00:18:05,184 - Terry, did you recently purchase 520 00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:07,452 A wicker basket? 521 00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:09,588 [dramatic musical sting] 522 00:18:09,723 --> 00:18:13,392 - I don't recall. - Honey, yes, you did. 523 00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:14,726 It's in the bathroom. 524 00:18:14,728 --> 00:18:16,195 It's holding your boat magazines. 525 00:18:16,329 --> 00:18:18,597 - Oh, thanks, honey. 526 00:18:18,732 --> 00:18:21,533 - Everyone, this is lucy's cashmo app. 527 00:18:21,535 --> 00:18:24,603 Note the top payment, ike crystal to lucy mcconky. 528 00:18:24,738 --> 00:18:27,606 Terry, are you aware that cashmo allows you 529 00:18:27,741 --> 00:18:29,541 To view your friends' transactions 530 00:18:29,543 --> 00:18:31,276 As well as your own? - How? 531 00:18:31,412 --> 00:18:32,811 - That's just the way cashmo works. 532 00:18:32,946 --> 00:18:35,214 - Everybody knows that. - Why would they do that? 533 00:18:35,348 --> 00:18:36,681 - Social media. - It's not social media. 534 00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:38,483 It's banking transactions. 535 00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:42,754 - Terry, did you reimburse jerry for a wicker basket? 536 00:18:42,756 --> 00:18:46,091 ♪ ♪ 537 00:18:46,093 --> 00:18:49,428 Did you or did you not reimburse jerry polonsky 538 00:18:49,563 --> 00:18:51,563 For a wicker basket that you purchased 539 00:18:51,565 --> 00:18:54,165 At the bonney lake arts & crafts fair? 540 00:18:54,301 --> 00:18:55,967 - Objection! Your honor, objection. 541 00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:58,037 - Overruled. I want to hear this. 542 00:18:58,171 --> 00:18:59,971 - If it pleases the court... 543 00:19:00,107 --> 00:19:02,373 ♪ ♪ 544 00:19:02,509 --> 00:19:04,443 Everybody, notice the bottom payment 545 00:19:04,578 --> 00:19:05,977 From one month ago. 546 00:19:06,113 --> 00:19:07,779 ♪ ♪ 547 00:19:07,915 --> 00:19:10,715 [all gasp] 548 00:19:10,717 --> 00:19:13,385 - Chief. 549 00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,520 - Dad, was polonsky in the car with you? 550 00:19:15,656 --> 00:19:18,323 - Terry, is that who you went to the concert with? 551 00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:21,927 - Terry, are you friends with polonsky? 552 00:19:22,062 --> 00:19:23,662 - That's ridiculous! 553 00:19:23,797 --> 00:19:25,730 - No, I'm not friends with polonsky. 554 00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:27,999 - You are under oath. - No, I'm not under oath. 555 00:19:28,135 --> 00:19:30,335 This is kangaroo court. - Tell us the truth. 556 00:19:30,471 --> 00:19:32,537 - You want the truth? - Yeah, I want the truth. 557 00:19:32,673 --> 00:19:35,140 - You want the truth? - Yeah, I want the truth! 558 00:19:35,276 --> 00:19:36,875 - I can't handle the truth. - Yes. 559 00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:38,677 Yes, I went to the arts & crafts fair 560 00:19:38,812 --> 00:19:40,545 With polonsky! 561 00:19:40,681 --> 00:19:43,815 We called it our crafternoon, and we got baskets, 562 00:19:43,951 --> 00:19:47,086 And we got dreamcatchers, and we watched glassblowing, 563 00:19:47,220 --> 00:19:49,420 And we had funnel cake, and you know what? 564 00:19:49,422 --> 00:19:52,557 We had a great time because we're friends! 565 00:19:52,693 --> 00:19:55,360 - We are friends. - There, I said it. 566 00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:58,163 And I feel free now! How's that? 567 00:19:58,299 --> 00:19:59,898 - How long has this been going on? 568 00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:02,101 - I ran into him at the bert kreisher concert 569 00:20:02,235 --> 00:20:03,435 In February. 570 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,837 We chatted. We laughed. We hit it off. 571 00:20:05,839 --> 00:20:08,173 He's hysterical. - He's hysterical. 572 00:20:08,175 --> 00:20:09,508 - Oh, and you know what? 573 00:20:09,643 --> 00:20:11,910 I went to the leigh weigh concert with him too, 574 00:20:12,045 --> 00:20:13,512 But you'd know that if you'd just looked 575 00:20:13,647 --> 00:20:15,380 At your picture more closely. 576 00:20:15,382 --> 00:20:18,049 My reflection is in the sunglasses! 577 00:20:18,051 --> 00:20:20,719 ♪ ♪ 578 00:20:20,854 --> 00:20:23,989 I had the time of my life. 579 00:20:23,991 --> 00:20:25,791 - Why have you been keeping this from us? 580 00:20:25,793 --> 00:20:27,392 - He's a cop! It's like "romeo and juliet." 581 00:20:27,528 --> 00:20:28,860 - With a dude every weekend? - It's so weird. 582 00:20:28,996 --> 00:20:30,796 - Besides, you're not supposed to make friends 583 00:20:30,931 --> 00:20:32,597 Over 40 with random new people. - Watching netflix by myself. 584 00:20:32,599 --> 00:20:33,999 - Why is it any different? - Nobody accepts it! 585 00:20:34,001 --> 00:20:35,600 - This is crazy! - You think I'm weird? 586 00:20:35,736 --> 00:20:36,935 - There's a tradition of the fire department 587 00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:38,470 Hating the police. - You guys have been 588 00:20:38,605 --> 00:20:39,671 Coming at me forever! 589 00:20:39,807 --> 00:20:41,740 - Order! Order in the courtroom! 590 00:20:41,875 --> 00:20:45,076 - And I don't wear spanx! - Order! Order! 591 00:20:45,078 --> 00:20:48,613 - [sniffing] 592 00:20:48,615 --> 00:20:51,082 - Mom? - [sniffs] 593 00:20:51,218 --> 00:20:53,618 Eddie, have you been using 594 00:20:53,754 --> 00:20:56,488 Maurice pasqual extra volumizing 595 00:20:56,490 --> 00:20:58,557 Ultra full body shampoo? 596 00:20:58,692 --> 00:21:00,892 - What? - Lucy uses it. 597 00:21:00,894 --> 00:21:03,094 - You were using it? - No, it's not maurice pasqual. 598 00:21:03,230 --> 00:21:05,364 It's not maurice pasqual. It's not maurice pasqual. 599 00:21:05,499 --> 00:21:06,565 - [sniffs] I smell it 600 00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:08,767 All over the place here. Wow, you guys. 601 00:21:08,902 --> 00:21:10,502 [sniffing] it's there. It's there. 602 00:21:10,504 --> 00:21:12,437 We got it-- - what are you, a bloodhound? 603 00:21:12,439 --> 00:21:14,706 - [sniffing] 604 00:21:14,842 --> 00:21:17,576 Mickleberry, you too? 605 00:21:17,711 --> 00:21:20,779 Terry, what are you paying these guys? 606 00:21:20,914 --> 00:21:22,247 - What? 607 00:21:22,383 --> 00:21:23,849 You said you were allergic, bro! 608 00:21:23,851 --> 00:21:26,385 - Okay, so what? It makes my curls look awesome. 609 00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:30,589 - You owe me $189. You both owe me $189.99. 610 00:21:30,724 --> 00:21:34,325 [laughs] oh, baby, yes! 611 00:21:34,461 --> 00:21:37,196 - Wait, what--ow. - [sniffs] 612 00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:40,932 I cannot believe this! This is rampant collusion! 613 00:21:40,934 --> 00:21:42,801 - He's the ringleader. He always has been. 614 00:21:42,936 --> 00:21:45,937 - Mickleberry did it! [slamming gavel] 615 00:21:46,073 --> 00:21:47,940 - Order in my courtroom! 616 00:21:49,276 --> 00:21:52,343 Looks like I got a lot of sentences to hand down. 617 00:21:52,345 --> 00:21:53,945 - And some to retract. 618 00:21:53,947 --> 00:21:57,482 - And I'm the only one who's not a shampoo thief. 619 00:21:57,618 --> 00:21:59,551 Cap, you should be ashamed of yourself. 620 00:21:59,553 --> 00:22:01,620 - Eh, I'm not sorry. My hair's sweet. 621 00:22:01,755 --> 00:22:03,354 - I hope you go bald. 622 00:22:03,490 --> 00:22:06,357 - Chief terry mcconky, this court finds you guilty 623 00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:10,429 Of secretly being friends with captain jerry polonsky. 624 00:22:10,564 --> 00:22:13,698 We're gonna take a short recess to figure out your punishment. 625 00:22:13,700 --> 00:22:15,067 [slams gavel] 626 00:22:17,170 --> 00:22:19,238 - Ooh, embroidered mushrooms. Look at that. 627 00:22:19,372 --> 00:22:20,639 - Hey. - Huh? 628 00:22:20,774 --> 00:22:22,441 - You're a fun guy. - [laughs] 629 00:22:22,576 --> 00:22:23,642 That's a good one. - Thank you. 630 00:22:23,777 --> 00:22:25,510 - Oh, man. Ooh, candles. 631 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:27,246 Look at this. [laughs] 632 00:22:27,380 --> 00:22:29,314 - I love fragrances. 633 00:22:29,316 --> 00:22:30,582 - Ah. [sniffs] 634 00:22:30,717 --> 00:22:31,650 Mm. - Hit me. 635 00:22:31,785 --> 00:22:33,985 [sniffs] sand and fog. 636 00:22:33,987 --> 00:22:36,521 I'd bet anything. - Oh! 637 00:22:36,657 --> 00:22:38,189 Huh? Nailed it. 638 00:22:38,191 --> 00:22:40,725 - Hey, guys, wait up. Check it out. 639 00:22:40,727 --> 00:22:42,928 Dreamcatchers, tons of 'em back there. 640 00:22:42,930 --> 00:22:43,929 - Sweet. 641 00:22:44,064 --> 00:22:45,797 - Also, there's a booth back there 642 00:22:45,799 --> 00:22:48,267 With homemade sleep masks with animal faces on 'em. 643 00:22:48,402 --> 00:22:51,603 I'm talking, like, owl eyes, racoon eyes, and whatnot. 644 00:22:51,738 --> 00:22:53,605 - Shut up. - I've gotta get one of those. 645 00:22:53,607 --> 00:22:55,206 - Me too! [laughter] 646 00:22:55,208 --> 00:22:56,942 - I gotta tell you something, eddie. 647 00:22:57,077 --> 00:22:58,677 When granny handed down that sentence 648 00:22:58,812 --> 00:23:00,145 And said that you couldn't use hair product 649 00:23:00,147 --> 00:23:01,880 And that we should spend the day together 650 00:23:02,015 --> 00:23:03,882 At the arts & crafts fair, I thought it was a punishment, 651 00:23:04,017 --> 00:23:06,084 But your hair looks great, and this has been a lot of fun. 652 00:23:06,219 --> 00:23:07,218 - It really has. 653 00:23:07,220 --> 00:23:08,820 I have to be honest. 654 00:23:08,822 --> 00:23:10,422 I didn't think I could hang out with a cop, 655 00:23:10,557 --> 00:23:12,023 Specifically this cop. 656 00:23:12,159 --> 00:23:14,559 - You. - But this has been terrific. 657 00:23:14,695 --> 00:23:16,495 - Really terrific. [chuckles] 658 00:23:16,630 --> 00:23:18,297 Hey, homemade bookmarks. 659 00:23:18,432 --> 00:23:19,698 - What? - You guys read? 660 00:23:19,833 --> 00:23:20,966 - Of course. - Okay, okay, hold on. 661 00:23:21,102 --> 00:23:22,834 I'll get some. - I'll catch up with you. 662 00:23:22,970 --> 00:23:24,369 - Hey, anyway, I wanted to thank you 663 00:23:24,505 --> 00:23:26,905 For being so cool about terry and I being friends, 664 00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,907 And who knows, maybe one day, the three of us, 665 00:23:29,042 --> 00:23:31,110 Maybe we'll be a trio. [chuckles] 666 00:23:31,244 --> 00:23:33,112 - Not on your life. 667 00:23:33,246 --> 00:23:36,648 I'm gonna bide my time like a lion in tall grass, 668 00:23:36,650 --> 00:23:38,717 And then poof, I'm gonna eat you, 669 00:23:38,852 --> 00:23:41,920 Bones and all, and you're gonna be gone, 670 00:23:42,055 --> 00:23:44,790 And no one will ever miss you. 671 00:23:44,925 --> 00:23:47,159 Hey, terry, wait up! I love bookmarks! 672 00:23:49,130 --> 00:23:50,996 - That's not a very nice thing to say to somebody. 673 00:23:51,132 --> 00:23:52,731 - Here, let's come back here. Let's come-- 674 00:23:52,866 --> 00:23:53,932 There's something I want to show you down here. 675 00:23:54,067 --> 00:23:55,134 - Yeah. - The dreamcatchers. 676 00:23:55,268 --> 00:23:56,868 - Oh, where are the dreamcatchers? 677 00:23:57,004 --> 00:23:58,337 - They're right back here. - Oh, great, okay. 678 00:23:58,471 --> 00:23:59,404 Should we get jerry or-- 679 00:23:59,540 --> 00:24:01,173 - Nah, nah, nah. He'll be fine.