1
00:00:02,536 --> 00:00:04,069
[laughter]
2
00:00:04,204 --> 00:00:05,804
- Wait.
You never pee in the shower?
3
00:00:05,940 --> 00:00:07,405
- Never. It's nasty.
- Really?
4
00:00:07,407 --> 00:00:09,207
Sometimes I hold it
until I'm in the shower.
5
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,209
- Yeah.
- Come on. How do you aim?
6
00:00:11,211 --> 00:00:12,611
- I don't.
- You don't have to aim.
7
00:00:12,613 --> 00:00:15,480
You're in the shower, bro.
- No, bro. What?
8
00:00:15,482 --> 00:00:16,615
- You are missing out on one of
9
00:00:16,750 --> 00:00:18,417
The finer things in life,
my friend.
10
00:00:18,552 --> 00:00:20,752
- What up, a-holes?
- Hey, what's up?
11
00:00:20,887 --> 00:00:22,521
- Hey.
- A-hole.
12
00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,291
- Whoa.
13
00:00:26,293 --> 00:00:28,160
What the hell's with all
the flavored seltzer water?
14
00:00:28,295 --> 00:00:31,095
- It was a gift from the guy we
uncoupled from the hot tub jet.
15
00:00:31,097 --> 00:00:33,432
- Yeah, but that doesn't mean
you have to drink it.
16
00:00:33,567 --> 00:00:35,300
I keep telling you,
that stuff sucks.
17
00:00:35,435 --> 00:00:36,769
It's a scourge.
Get rid of it.
18
00:00:36,903 --> 00:00:38,503
- No. I love it.
- Yeah, you got to try
19
00:00:38,639 --> 00:00:40,839
This fizzle froot
guava jalapeño, my friend.
20
00:00:40,975 --> 00:00:43,976
- And the lepleux pamplemousse
is always a solid choice.
21
00:00:44,110 --> 00:00:45,177
- But there's barely
any flavor.
22
00:00:45,312 --> 00:00:48,112
- Exactly.
[laughter]
23
00:00:48,114 --> 00:00:50,983
- Why would you drink something
with hardly any flavor?
24
00:00:51,117 --> 00:00:52,584
- I don't know.
'cause it's good.
25
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:54,186
Just a whiff.
26
00:00:54,321 --> 00:00:56,454
- Yeah, 'cause we like it.
[laughs]
27
00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:58,256
- You people never
listen to me.
28
00:00:58,258 --> 00:00:59,792
Those drinks are a scam.
29
00:00:59,926 --> 00:01:01,660
You only drink them
because they're trendy.
30
00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:02,995
Let me show you
how they make them.
31
00:01:03,130 --> 00:01:06,264
[upbeat music]
32
00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:13,439
♪ ♪
33
00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:18,577
[farts]
34
00:01:20,681 --> 00:01:23,882
Mm-hmm. There you go.
Penisi froot.
35
00:01:23,884 --> 00:01:25,283
Grape-eux.
36
00:01:25,285 --> 00:01:26,685
- Pfft.
- You're gross.
37
00:01:26,821 --> 00:01:28,687
- I'm not sure it works
like that, but, uh...
38
00:01:28,823 --> 00:01:30,289
- He's really cranky.
39
00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:36,695
Are you gonna make me try it?
- Obviously, yes.
40
00:01:36,831 --> 00:01:37,763
- Yup.
41
00:01:41,168 --> 00:01:42,701
[laughs]
so he drinks it.
42
00:01:42,837 --> 00:01:45,170
[laughs]
I can't believe you drank it.
43
00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,239
- Oh, boy.
44
00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:48,841
- Actually, pretty good.
- What?
45
00:01:48,975 --> 00:01:52,044
- Yeah, right.
Whatever.
46
00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:53,512
Ah, let me try.
[laughs]
47
00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:55,113
- Ike, what are you doing, man?
48
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:56,915
- Ah, it still smells
like farts.
49
00:01:57,051 --> 00:01:58,316
I'm drinking it.
50
00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:00,419
♪ ♪
51
00:02:03,057 --> 00:02:04,723
[exhales]
52
00:02:06,060 --> 00:02:07,192
That is nice.
53
00:02:07,327 --> 00:02:10,195
[foreigner's "hot blooded"]
54
00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:15,600
♪ ♪
55
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:18,603
- ♪ well, I'm hot-blooded ♪
56
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:21,339
♪ check it and see ♪
57
00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:25,009
♪ I got a fever of 103 ♪
58
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,680
♪ I'm hot-blooded ♪
59
00:02:29,884 --> 00:02:32,284
- What the hell?
Where's my soccer game?
60
00:02:32,419 --> 00:02:35,019
Hey, guys, I recorded
ac milan versus udinese,
61
00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:36,821
And it's not here.
You know what happened?
62
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:39,558
- We thought it was recorded
by mistake and we deleted it.
63
00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:41,426
- Mickleberry.
- Come on, man.
64
00:02:41,562 --> 00:02:43,027
- Don't admit it, man.
- Are you kidding me?
65
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:45,029
- Yeah, sorry, cap.
We needed to make room for this
66
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:47,366
Game show we've been watching
where people eat stuff
67
00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:49,501
To figure out if it's cake
or made of legos.
68
00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:51,704
[laughs]
it's really good.
69
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:53,638
- That was a huge match.
70
00:02:53,640 --> 00:02:56,441
Ac milan is currently
number one in calcio a,
71
00:02:56,443 --> 00:02:58,510
But sassuolo, juventus,
72
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:02,180
Atalanta, and udinese
are currently in contention.
73
00:03:02,316 --> 00:03:03,916
- Are those cars or...
74
00:03:04,050 --> 00:03:06,651
- They're soccer teams, bro.
- Kind of feel about soccer
75
00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:08,453
The way you feel about
flavored seltzers.
76
00:03:08,589 --> 00:03:09,922
- Aren't you mexican?
77
00:03:10,056 --> 00:03:11,523
- Is this gonna be
a gross generalization?
78
00:03:11,658 --> 00:03:13,258
- Mexican people love soccer.
- Not me.
79
00:03:13,260 --> 00:03:15,527
I think it's boring.
They just pass the ball around
80
00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:17,529
And the game ends
in a zero-zero tie.
81
00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:19,264
- I'm with him.
I want touchdowns,
82
00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:20,532
Scoring, homeruns, that's it.
83
00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:22,200
- No, that's the beauty
of the game.
84
00:03:22,336 --> 00:03:24,869
It's a chess match that's often
decided by just one goal.
85
00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:27,205
It's incredible.
The fans are going bananas.
86
00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:28,607
All: [snoring]
- you know, I keep saying
87
00:03:28,742 --> 00:03:31,209
We should watch a game
together sometime.
88
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:34,346
Fine. Okay. Fine. Fine.
89
00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:37,415
I try to broaden your horizons,
and this is the thanks I get.
90
00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:40,018
- My horizons are plenty
broadened, okay?
91
00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:41,886
I'm gonna be a star
because of this uke.
92
00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:43,221
I'm writing parody songs
93
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,423
And the first song
I'm parodying is "purple rain."
94
00:03:45,425 --> 00:03:48,693
I call it "carpool lane."
[laughs]
95
00:03:48,695 --> 00:03:53,031
♪ carpool lane, carpool lane ♪
[mimics electric guitar]
96
00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:55,700
- That's awesome.
- That was pretty great, man.
97
00:03:55,702 --> 00:03:58,437
- My god, granny, song parodies
are the lowest form
98
00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:00,438
Of entertainment
on the entire planet.
99
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,440
Any idiot can
"weird al" yankovic a song.
100
00:04:02,442 --> 00:04:03,776
- That's not true.
101
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,110
- Yeah?
Name a popular song right now.
102
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,578
- Uh, "smear my dick sauce"
103
00:04:06,713 --> 00:04:09,113
By changy b featuring
pdq zygote.
104
00:04:09,115 --> 00:04:11,249
- Smear my dick sauce. Okay.
105
00:04:12,119 --> 00:04:15,053
"shear my ticks off," and you
sing it in a sheep's voice.
106
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:17,522
Boom. It's that easy.
- Hey, can I use that?
107
00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:19,524
- Yeah, take it.
Do what you want with it.
108
00:04:19,660 --> 00:04:21,193
Throw it in the trash.
It's gonna suck.
109
00:04:21,328 --> 00:04:22,795
- Wait, wait, hold on a second.
Back up.
110
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:25,597
Are you saying that "weird al"
yankovic takes a song
111
00:04:25,732 --> 00:04:28,600
That's already popular and then
does his version of it?
112
00:04:28,735 --> 00:04:30,869
'cause I'm pretty sure
it's the other way around.
113
00:04:30,871 --> 00:04:33,738
- Are you telling me that you
think that "weird al" yankovic
114
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:36,941
Wrote a song called
"another one rides the bus,"
115
00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:39,478
And in response,
freddie mercury and queen wrote
116
00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,147
"another one bites the dust"?
- Yeah.
117
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:45,217
- Ikey, respectfully, you have
said some dumb things in
118
00:04:45,352 --> 00:04:48,286
Your life, but this one might
be the dumbest of them all.
119
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:49,822
- That's not respectful at all.
120
00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:51,956
- No, he's right.
I am super stupid.
121
00:04:52,092 --> 00:04:54,292
I say dumb shit all the time.
He's always telling me that
122
00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:56,628
I say dumb stuff and I'm like,
"thank you for pointing
123
00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:58,096
"that out because now
I know that I'm an idiot
124
00:04:58,232 --> 00:04:59,764
And I should probably
just stop thinking."
125
00:04:59,766 --> 00:05:01,033
- Hey, what's up, gang?
- Not much.
126
00:05:01,168 --> 00:05:03,368
Cap's just pissing in
everyone's cheerios.
127
00:05:03,504 --> 00:05:04,769
- No, I'm not.
I'm trying to give out
128
00:05:04,905 --> 00:05:07,172
Life advice, but no one
appreciates it.
129
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:08,907
For example,
130
00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:11,109
Mickleberry,
you sit around all day
131
00:05:11,111 --> 00:05:14,179
Eating onion bagels and you
wonder why your breath stinks.
132
00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:16,114
- [gasps]
edward caesar penisi.
133
00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:17,716
I know you're upset,
134
00:05:17,852 --> 00:05:19,718
But breath-shaming the probie,
that is a bridge too far.
135
00:05:19,854 --> 00:05:21,720
- Well, so is shame-shaming me.
136
00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:23,722
I'm trying to improve his life.
The kid is constantly
137
00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:25,590
Complaining about
his breath being bad.
138
00:05:25,592 --> 00:05:27,325
- He's right, chief. I am.
139
00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:29,794
But I still want that bagel.
- No, I'm doing you a favor.
140
00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:30,995
I'm trying to do
all of you favors.
141
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:32,397
- You are very ornery.
142
00:05:32,399 --> 00:05:33,798
Are you going through
man-opause?
143
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,333
- No, I'm not going through
man-opause.
144
00:05:35,469 --> 00:05:37,536
I sacrificed one of my nuts
for this station
145
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:39,538
And I don't get an ounce
of appreciation.
146
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,005
- Well, I made the same
sacrifice.
147
00:05:41,141 --> 00:05:42,741
You don't see me
running around here
148
00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:44,409
Rubbing my one testicle
in everyone's face.
149
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:47,212
- [laughs]
- okay, well, there's this.
150
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:50,215
[upbeat music]
151
00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:51,950
♪ ♪
152
00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:53,752
I said I wanted
this stuff gone,
153
00:05:53,754 --> 00:05:54,953
But nobody listens to me.
154
00:05:55,089 --> 00:05:57,355
So now, I'm gonna
dump it myself.
155
00:05:57,491 --> 00:06:00,358
- Oh, come on. Really?
- Don't.
156
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,426
- What are you doing?
- Cap!
157
00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,629
- What are you doing, cap?
158
00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:05,964
- No, no, no, no, no.
- No, don't, cap.
159
00:06:06,100 --> 00:06:07,566
Don't touch it!
- No, no, no, no!
160
00:06:07,568 --> 00:06:09,101
[all protesting, groaning]
161
00:06:09,236 --> 00:06:10,502
- I organized that.
162
00:06:10,637 --> 00:06:12,237
- There. Honestly,
163
00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:15,440
I would like to see you all
try to manage without me.
164
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:18,310
It would be a total disaster.
165
00:06:18,445 --> 00:06:20,546
All: [scream]
- [grunts]
166
00:06:22,983 --> 00:06:24,116
- [gasps]
167
00:06:24,251 --> 00:06:25,584
[groans]
168
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,452
Oh, boy. Okay.
169
00:06:27,588 --> 00:06:29,187
[hisses]
170
00:06:29,189 --> 00:06:31,390
[upbeat music]
171
00:06:31,525 --> 00:06:34,058
[groans]
wow. That hurt.
172
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,394
Oh, boy.
173
00:06:35,529 --> 00:06:36,729
Hey, ike,
do you wanna help me up?
174
00:06:36,863 --> 00:06:39,197
I kind of rang my bell.
[groans]
175
00:06:39,199 --> 00:06:43,468
- Man, this smidge banapricot
one is nice.
176
00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:45,203
- Ooh, I love smidge.
177
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:49,207
♪ just a smidge of flavor
means a smidge of taste ♪
178
00:06:49,343 --> 00:06:50,875
[laughs]
179
00:06:50,877 --> 00:06:53,278
- God, what the hell, guys?
You that mad at me?
180
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,147
- They're not mad at you,
eddie.
181
00:06:55,282 --> 00:06:57,882
How can they be mad at someone
who doesn't exist?
182
00:06:58,018 --> 00:06:59,351
- Who are you?
183
00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:02,955
- They can't be mad at you
because you were never born.
184
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,023
- Oh, are you from
softwood meadows?
185
00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:06,558
Hold on.
You got an id bracelet?
186
00:07:06,693 --> 00:07:07,960
- No, eddie, eddie,
187
00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:10,629
I'm not from the assisted
living facility.
188
00:07:10,765 --> 00:07:13,298
I'm your guardian angel,
lawrence.
189
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:14,833
- [laughs]
190
00:07:14,835 --> 00:07:16,701
Uh, hey, someone call
softwood meadows.
191
00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:18,703
See if they're missing
a patient.
192
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:20,839
Hey, joke's over.
This guy needs help.
193
00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:23,041
- You really are a thick one,
aren't you, eddie?
194
00:07:23,043 --> 00:07:25,644
Haven't you ever seen
a hallmark christmas movie?
195
00:07:25,780 --> 00:07:28,847
- [laughs]
okay, the prank's over.
196
00:07:28,983 --> 00:07:31,183
The prank's over.
- It's not a prank, eddie.
197
00:07:31,318 --> 00:07:33,918
Stick your hand down your pants
and find out.
198
00:07:34,054 --> 00:07:35,520
- [laughs]
199
00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:39,257
Okay, stick my hand down my
pants and this isn't a prank?
200
00:07:39,259 --> 00:07:41,193
Okay, I'm gonna put my hand
in my pants.
201
00:07:41,328 --> 00:07:43,862
You guys can take a photo.
We'll all have a nice laugh.
202
00:07:43,998 --> 00:07:45,998
Okay, here we go.
Here we go.
203
00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:48,000
Oh, yeah. Oh, that's
my kind of day right here.
204
00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:50,469
- Yeah, how many testicles
do you feel, eddie?
205
00:07:50,471 --> 00:07:53,271
♪ ♪
206
00:07:53,273 --> 00:07:56,408
- [gasps] oh, my god,
I've got two testicles.
207
00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:59,544
- You have two testicles
because you didn't pop one
208
00:07:59,546 --> 00:08:01,680
Pulling chief mcconky
out of that fire.
209
00:08:01,816 --> 00:08:05,484
Because you were never born.
210
00:08:05,486 --> 00:08:07,619
- Let's go.
- All right.
211
00:08:07,754 --> 00:08:09,822
- Eddie, I'm an angel,
212
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:13,358
And I'm here to show you
what life would be like
213
00:08:13,494 --> 00:08:15,093
Without you.
214
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:18,998
♪ ♪
215
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:24,536
- So am I a ghost?
- [chuckles] no.
216
00:08:24,672 --> 00:08:26,071
- Can I float?
- No.
217
00:08:26,206 --> 00:08:28,206
- Can I walk through people?
- No.
218
00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:31,143
- Can I haunt anyone?
- Eddie, eddie.
219
00:08:31,145 --> 00:08:34,146
I'm an angel,
and I'm here to show you
220
00:08:34,148 --> 00:08:38,550
What station 24 would be like
if you'd never been born.
221
00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:40,018
- Oh.
- Come on.
222
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,487
Now take your hand
out of your pants.
223
00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:43,755
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah. Okay.
224
00:08:43,891 --> 00:08:45,223
- [sighs]
- what--what are we doing?
225
00:08:45,225 --> 00:08:47,693
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
[whooshing]
226
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:51,163
Whoa. God, you just whooshed us
through that wall.
227
00:08:51,298 --> 00:08:53,365
I mean, you do realize you only
saved us, like, two seconds.
228
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:56,434
But still.
- Eddie, observe.
229
00:08:56,570 --> 00:08:58,436
- Oh, man,
this place is a mess.
230
00:08:58,572 --> 00:09:00,172
Well, they're packing up.
What?
231
00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:01,573
Oh, my god.
232
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:03,641
The station got shut down
without me?
233
00:09:03,643 --> 00:09:04,776
- Granny, can you believe
we're moving into
234
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:06,444
A brand-new deluxe station?
235
00:09:06,580 --> 00:09:08,847
- [chuckles] yeah, well, that's
what happens when you win
236
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:12,450
Best shift in america
three years in a row, baby!
237
00:09:12,452 --> 00:09:14,052
[laughs]
- oh, yeah.
238
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,522
- Best shift in america?
Without me?
239
00:09:16,656 --> 00:09:19,457
- Hey, ike, I'm really sorry
I won't be joining you.
240
00:09:19,593 --> 00:09:20,926
- Ah, I'm sorry too, granny.
241
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:23,395
- Oh, man,
granny didn't make the cut.
242
00:09:23,531 --> 00:09:25,263
- No, no, he quit.
243
00:09:25,399 --> 00:09:26,932
- [groans]
hey, thanks for letting me
244
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,666
Leave my platinum albums here.
245
00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:30,202
They're putting
solid gold bidets
246
00:09:30,337 --> 00:09:31,937
In every room in my mansion.
247
00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:34,072
- What did he just say?
- Without you shitting all over
248
00:09:34,208 --> 00:09:36,742
The fine art form
of song parody,
249
00:09:36,877 --> 00:09:40,011
Granny went on to be
even bigger than weird al.
250
00:09:40,147 --> 00:09:42,013
- Bigger than weird al?
- I got to say,
251
00:09:42,015 --> 00:09:44,416
That last multimillion
dollar-selling album
252
00:09:44,418 --> 00:09:46,084
That you made was so funny.
253
00:09:46,220 --> 00:09:48,620
"uptown skunk" instead
of "uptown funk?"
254
00:09:48,756 --> 00:09:50,088
How do you even think
of that stuff?
255
00:09:50,224 --> 00:09:51,489
It makes me laugh every time
I think about it.
256
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:53,024
- [laughs]
- "uptown skunk."
257
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:55,026
I'm just like, it's so funny.
- Oh, and did I tell you
258
00:09:55,028 --> 00:09:57,229
That disney is going to make
a animated movie about it?
259
00:09:57,231 --> 00:09:58,830
And they're going to give me
a piece of the merch.
260
00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:00,432
- Shut up.
- A piece of the merch.
261
00:10:00,434 --> 00:10:02,434
- I wonder if I could fit these
in my lamborghini.
262
00:10:02,436 --> 00:10:03,769
- A lambo?
263
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:05,837
- Guess I have to put them
in my other lambo.
264
00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:07,906
[laughter]
- I forgot you have two.
265
00:10:07,908 --> 00:10:08,974
Come on.
- Come on.
266
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:10,576
- Hey, can I drive one?
- Nah.
267
00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:11,977
- No, I know.
268
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:13,579
- I thought you were
supposed to show me
269
00:10:13,713 --> 00:10:15,313
That their lives were worse
without me, not better.
270
00:10:15,315 --> 00:10:17,182
- I have no control
over that, eddie.
271
00:10:17,317 --> 00:10:19,117
I'm just trying to help you
appreciate them.
272
00:10:19,253 --> 00:10:21,453
- I don't think their lives
are better off without me.
273
00:10:21,589 --> 00:10:23,922
And I do appreciate them.
- No, eddie, you don't.
274
00:10:24,057 --> 00:10:26,592
You think they should
all be like you.
275
00:10:26,726 --> 00:10:28,794
But if you really
appreciate them,
276
00:10:28,929 --> 00:10:31,263
Then I'll get my wings,
and you'll hear a bell.
277
00:10:31,265 --> 00:10:32,864
[bell ringing]
278
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,333
- Oh, and what happens
if you don't get your wings?
279
00:10:35,469 --> 00:10:37,669
- Then I'll go to hell.
280
00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:38,737
And you'll hear this.
281
00:10:38,872 --> 00:10:41,139
[trombone whomping]
282
00:10:41,275 --> 00:10:42,207
- Oh, man.
283
00:10:42,342 --> 00:10:43,541
That's a bummer.
Ok.
284
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:44,943
Well, I hope
I can help you out.
285
00:10:44,945 --> 00:10:46,344
By the way,
thank you for choosing me
286
00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:47,545
To be my guardian angel.
287
00:10:47,681 --> 00:10:49,080
- No, I--
I didn't choose you, eddie.
288
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:50,682
You were randomly assigned.
- That's weird.
289
00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:52,750
I feel like you'd be the kind
of guy that would choose me,
290
00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:54,152
You know, a fellow italian.
291
00:10:54,288 --> 00:10:55,621
And probably a
former firefighter, am I right?
292
00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:58,690
- No, no,
former travel agent from ohio.
293
00:10:58,692 --> 00:10:59,891
I'm actually a woman.
294
00:10:59,893 --> 00:11:01,159
They just have me
appear to you
295
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,161
In what's deemed
an appealing form.
296
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:04,963
- Is this what you
look like as a woman?
297
00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:07,032
- No, actually, I--
I looked like uma thurman.
298
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,366
[chuckles]
299
00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:09,835
- Well, honestly,
I would find that to be
300
00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:10,969
A more appealing form.
- [chuckles]
301
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:12,570
- Can I see?
- No.
302
00:11:12,706 --> 00:11:13,839
- Come on.
Give me a little taste.
303
00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:15,307
- Don't get weird.
Come on.
304
00:11:15,309 --> 00:11:16,775
Let's keep going.
- Where are we going?
305
00:11:16,910 --> 00:11:17,976
Whoa.
[whooshing]
306
00:11:17,978 --> 00:11:20,245
[laughs] I love the whoosh.
307
00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:22,780
It's amazing.
- Ok, eddie, observe.
308
00:11:22,782 --> 00:11:24,115
- How often do
you do the whoosh?
309
00:11:24,117 --> 00:11:26,652
All the time?
- Eddie, please, observe.
310
00:11:26,787 --> 00:11:29,387
- Hey, just out of curiosity,
how far could you whoosh us?
311
00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:30,922
Could you whoosh us
across town?
312
00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:33,325
- Eddie.
- Could you whoosh us anywhere?
313
00:11:33,327 --> 00:11:35,627
- [sighs] ok.
314
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:42,000
- Holy shit.
The waterfalls of zihuatanejo!
315
00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:43,335
- [chuckles]
- I always wanted to come here.
316
00:11:43,471 --> 00:11:45,737
It's on my bucket list.
- I know that.
317
00:11:45,873 --> 00:11:47,605
And I can whoosh you anywhere.
318
00:11:47,741 --> 00:11:48,674
[whooshing]
319
00:11:48,808 --> 00:11:50,342
- Oh, that was awesome!
320
00:11:50,344 --> 00:11:52,077
Zihuatanejo.
Are you kidding me?
321
00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:53,945
- Can we get on with this now?
- Yes.
322
00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:55,413
Yes.
- Whoops.
323
00:11:55,549 --> 00:11:56,548
Here we go.
324
00:11:56,684 --> 00:12:01,153
Yeah, call coming in
in 3, 2--
325
00:12:01,155 --> 00:12:02,488
[alarm blaring]
- attention 24,
326
00:12:02,622 --> 00:12:04,089
Rescue 42,
a marijuana dispensary.
327
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,823
Structure fire.
Respond...
328
00:12:05,825 --> 00:12:08,026
- You did it again.
That was the call.
329
00:12:08,162 --> 00:12:10,095
- How'd he do that?
- Now hold on now.
330
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,497
It's going to be a false alarm.
331
00:12:11,631 --> 00:12:13,298
[alarm blaring]
- station 24. False alarm.
332
00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,767
Now reported as
just a lot of weed smoke.
333
00:12:15,769 --> 00:12:17,569
- [chuckles]
ike, your psychic powers
334
00:12:17,571 --> 00:12:18,904
Never cease to amaze me.
335
00:12:19,039 --> 00:12:20,572
- Ike has psychic powers?
336
00:12:20,708 --> 00:12:22,174
- He does.
337
00:12:22,176 --> 00:12:24,242
Because you weren't always
telling him he was dumb,
338
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:25,711
He didn't believe he was dumb.
339
00:12:25,846 --> 00:12:28,046
And he exercised
his brain muscles.
340
00:12:28,048 --> 00:12:30,582
And now he can
predict the future.
341
00:12:30,718 --> 00:12:32,184
- [scoffs] son of a bitch.
342
00:12:32,319 --> 00:12:33,919
- Ike, I never
understand why you don't
343
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:35,653
Use your incredible gift
to make millions
344
00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:37,122
In the stock market.
345
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:38,323
- [chuckles] I knew you
were going to say that.
346
00:12:38,458 --> 00:12:40,926
So, granny,
I have psychic abilities.
347
00:12:41,061 --> 00:12:42,861
But I can't
travel back in time
348
00:12:42,996 --> 00:12:45,197
And change the value of stocks.
349
00:12:45,332 --> 00:12:46,398
You understand?
350
00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,200
- [chuckles]
psychic powers, yes.
351
00:12:48,202 --> 00:12:50,668
But still, some--
some trouble in other areas.
352
00:12:50,804 --> 00:12:52,137
- [chuckles] yeah, all right.
353
00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:54,472
Well, so ike is better off too.
354
00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:55,874
Where's mickleberry?
355
00:12:56,009 --> 00:12:57,743
- Ah, step this way.
356
00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,811
- Why are we walking?
- Because we're not whooshing.
357
00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:01,346
- Oh, come on.
Let's whoosh.
358
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:02,948
- Eddie.
359
00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:05,016
- Dr. Mickleberry,
tell me the story
360
00:13:05,018 --> 00:13:06,885
Of how you won
the nobel prize.
361
00:13:06,887 --> 00:13:08,286
- Dr. Mickleberry?
362
00:13:08,422 --> 00:13:10,222
- I was a rookie firefighter
in tacoma.
363
00:13:10,224 --> 00:13:12,558
One day, I was just
eating an onion bagel.
364
00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:14,960
And suddenly,
the inspiration hit me.
365
00:13:15,095 --> 00:13:17,095
I realized how
I could cure halitosis.
366
00:13:17,231 --> 00:13:20,165
- The onion bagel sparked
the cure for halitosis?
367
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,433
- It did.
368
00:13:21,435 --> 00:13:22,968
Since you weren't here
to snatch that bagel
369
00:13:23,103 --> 00:13:24,836
Out of his hand,
mickleberry went on
370
00:13:24,972 --> 00:13:27,105
To make the entire world
a better place.
371
00:13:27,241 --> 00:13:29,975
- My absence
eliminated halitosis
372
00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:31,509
Across the entire planet?
373
00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:33,245
That seems like kind of
a wild coincidence.
374
00:13:33,380 --> 00:13:34,646
- Ah, boy.
375
00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:36,048
You are a tough nut to
crack there, eddie boy.
376
00:13:36,183 --> 00:13:38,584
Why can't you appreciate
that your crew
377
00:13:38,718 --> 00:13:40,052
Has talents beyond you?
378
00:13:40,187 --> 00:13:42,054
- Maybe it's not me
who's dragging them down.
379
00:13:42,189 --> 00:13:43,721
Maybe the new captain
just happens
380
00:13:43,857 --> 00:13:45,057
To be a super cool,
exciting guy
381
00:13:45,192 --> 00:13:47,059
Who brings out the best
in everybody.
382
00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:47,993
- Maybe.
383
00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:49,661
- Hey, cap.
- Hey, guys.
384
00:13:49,663 --> 00:13:51,263
What's crackulating?
- There goes that theory.
385
00:13:51,398 --> 00:13:52,998
- [chuckles]
- granny, good to see you.
386
00:13:53,133 --> 00:13:56,001
Hey, I cannot stop
listening to your music.
387
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,737
That song "carpool lane,"
oh, I love it.
388
00:13:58,872 --> 00:13:59,871
- [chuckles]
- I only want to see you
389
00:14:00,007 --> 00:14:01,206
Driving in the carpool lane.
390
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:02,741
Carpool lane.
Carpool lane.
391
00:14:02,876 --> 00:14:04,342
It's brilliant.
It's brilliant.
392
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,811
It's a parody.
But it's like its own song.
393
00:14:05,946 --> 00:14:07,345
You know what I mean?
- Thanks, cap.
394
00:14:07,481 --> 00:14:09,547
But you know I got newer songs
than that, right?
395
00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:10,682
- Oh, I know that.
396
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:12,017
I listen to the new stuff too.
397
00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:13,418
Lou let the frogs out.
398
00:14:13,553 --> 00:14:15,287
Croak. Croak.
Croak. Croak.
399
00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:17,823
[laughter]
that's a great one.
400
00:14:17,958 --> 00:14:19,825
You bring so much joy to me.
I don't know how you do it.
401
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,293
You take someone else's song,
402
00:14:21,295 --> 00:14:22,428
You change the words
a little bit,
403
00:14:22,562 --> 00:14:23,962
And then you make it
your own.
404
00:14:23,964 --> 00:14:24,963
It's amazing.
405
00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:26,164
You're better than weird al.
406
00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:27,699
- [laughs] oh, my god.
407
00:14:27,835 --> 00:14:29,435
I'm going to--I'm blushing.
You just can't see it.
408
00:14:29,569 --> 00:14:31,102
- You know who else
loves your music?
409
00:14:31,104 --> 00:14:33,171
My son.
- His son?
410
00:14:33,173 --> 00:14:34,706
[rock music]
411
00:14:34,842 --> 00:14:37,309
- 'sup, dad.
412
00:14:37,311 --> 00:14:38,243
Hey, guys.
413
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,777
Here's the reports
you asked for.
414
00:14:39,779 --> 00:14:41,513
- Lukey, you never let me down.
415
00:14:41,649 --> 00:14:42,981
- Ah, thanks, dad.
416
00:14:43,116 --> 00:14:44,716
- Lucy is lukey?
417
00:14:44,718 --> 00:14:47,185
- Because terry didn't have
to pull you out of the fire,
418
00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:49,521
He never popped his boy nut,
and, therefore,
419
00:14:49,523 --> 00:14:52,390
Was able to sire the son
he always wanted.
420
00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:53,792
- That doesn't make sense.
421
00:14:53,927 --> 00:14:55,060
The whole boy nut,
girl nut thing
422
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:56,795
Is based on terry's
misunderstanding
423
00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:58,263
Of human biology.
424
00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,132
- Yes, but because you
weren't here to debunk it,
425
00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:03,735
His belief had a psychosomatic
effect on his own sperm.
426
00:15:03,871 --> 00:15:05,203
- I love having a son.
427
00:15:05,339 --> 00:15:06,604
- [laughs]
oh, man.
428
00:15:06,740 --> 00:15:09,274
I love being your son, dad.
Hey, think fast.
429
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:11,343
- Oh, jesus!
Ok, all right.
430
00:15:11,345 --> 00:15:13,011
- You're such a pussy, dad.
431
00:15:13,147 --> 00:15:14,813
- The kid's kind of
a douche, though, huh?
432
00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:16,414
- Yeah, a little bit.
433
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:19,151
- Ok. So if terry's the
captain, who's the chief?
434
00:15:19,153 --> 00:15:20,686
- Look alive, sausage party.
435
00:15:20,821 --> 00:15:23,689
♪ ♪
436
00:15:23,824 --> 00:15:25,757
The chief is on deck.
437
00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:26,892
[dramatic music]
438
00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:28,760
- [whimpers]
439
00:15:28,896 --> 00:15:31,163
- Dick tap.
- Oh, my balls!
440
00:15:31,165 --> 00:15:32,297
- I knew he was
going to do that.
441
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:33,866
He's a great kid.
- [groans]
442
00:15:35,902 --> 00:15:37,902
[laughter]
443
00:15:37,904 --> 00:15:41,573
- So then I say, hey, I know
you're lactose intolerant.
444
00:15:41,708 --> 00:15:42,975
Just don't milk it.
445
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:45,377
- Oh!
[laughs]
446
00:15:45,512 --> 00:15:48,180
Gee, that is the funniest
story I've ever heard.
447
00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:49,914
- That's a dumb joke.
That's not funny.
448
00:15:49,916 --> 00:15:51,049
- Eddie.
- You know, I've been thinking
449
00:15:51,185 --> 00:15:52,517
About the pickleball
tournament.
450
00:15:52,653 --> 00:15:54,452
What have we won?
Like, 10 years in a row now?
451
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:55,587
- At least.
452
00:15:55,722 --> 00:15:57,189
- Maybe we need to
handicap ourselves,
453
00:15:57,324 --> 00:15:58,723
Tie our shoelaces together.
454
00:15:58,725 --> 00:16:00,258
- Oh, like,
tie my shoelaces together?
455
00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:02,126
Or tie my shoelaces
to your shoelaces?
456
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:04,997
- [laughs] I hadn't
even thought about that.
457
00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:06,731
- [laughs]
- I love it.
458
00:16:06,733 --> 00:16:08,133
Hysterical.
459
00:16:08,268 --> 00:16:09,668
You just bought yourself
two more vacation days.
460
00:16:09,804 --> 00:16:11,603
- Thank you, chief.
- Where's the sniveling,
461
00:16:11,738 --> 00:16:13,872
Snarky pain in the ass
wolf boykins?
462
00:16:14,008 --> 00:16:16,074
Is this wolf cool?
- Yes, eddie.
463
00:16:16,210 --> 00:16:18,477
Because you never tormented him
at the academy,
464
00:16:18,479 --> 00:16:21,613
Wolf developed into a really
charming and confident guy.
465
00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:23,948
He also parts his hair
on the other side
466
00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:26,751
And has chosen to
stay uncircumcised.
467
00:16:26,753 --> 00:16:28,420
Don't ask me why.
468
00:16:28,555 --> 00:16:29,688
- Ok, yes,
469
00:16:29,690 --> 00:16:31,623
I foreskin-shamed him
once or twice.
470
00:16:31,758 --> 00:16:32,825
- 17 times.
471
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:34,959
- Ok.
But how did he become chief?
472
00:16:35,095 --> 00:16:37,229
- Hey, guys.
473
00:16:37,364 --> 00:16:39,832
- [chuckles] well, at least
vicky is still with terry.
474
00:16:39,966 --> 00:16:41,233
- Oh, hey.
475
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:43,635
- There she is.
Sweeter than a georgia peach.
476
00:16:43,770 --> 00:16:45,570
- Oh, come here.
477
00:16:45,572 --> 00:16:47,172
[both moan]
478
00:16:47,174 --> 00:16:48,907
- What? No.
479
00:16:49,043 --> 00:16:52,244
- Yep, without you here to
set your sister up with terry,
480
00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:53,846
She and wolf fell in love.
481
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:55,514
- Oh, my god.
It's disgusting.
482
00:16:55,516 --> 00:16:57,649
- Hey, vicky.
- Hey, tommy.
483
00:16:57,784 --> 00:16:58,851
- It's actually terry.
484
00:16:58,985 --> 00:17:00,318
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- [laughs]
485
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:01,653
- That's right.
I knew that.
486
00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:03,055
- People say that
all the time, so...
487
00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:04,923
- Of course,
once she married wolf,
488
00:17:04,925 --> 00:17:06,725
Commissioner penisi
fast-tracked him
489
00:17:06,861 --> 00:17:08,193
Into the chief spot.
490
00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:10,262
- Oh, yeah, that figures.
Same as terry.
491
00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:12,264
[flute playing]
- did you guys hear something?
492
00:17:12,399 --> 00:17:13,465
- What's that, cap?
- What do you mean?
493
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:14,933
- I felt a cold shiver
in the room.
494
00:17:15,069 --> 00:17:16,735
Did you feel that?
- Oh, that's us.
495
00:17:16,737 --> 00:17:18,002
- Ok.
- We haunted him.
496
00:17:18,138 --> 00:17:19,204
- Shh.
- Oh, hey, ms. Boykins.
497
00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:20,739
Good to see you.
- Hey.
498
00:17:20,875 --> 00:17:22,074
- Hey, chief.
499
00:17:22,209 --> 00:17:23,075
Here's the reports
you asked for.
500
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:24,476
- Lukey!
- Hey, dad!
501
00:17:24,611 --> 00:17:25,343
[both laugh]
502
00:17:25,479 --> 00:17:27,345
- Who is lukey mcconky's mom?
503
00:17:27,481 --> 00:17:29,147
- Oh, terry met
a very nice woman
504
00:17:29,283 --> 00:17:31,950
At his bagpipe class
named orla.
505
00:17:31,952 --> 00:17:33,618
- Ugh, "orla."
506
00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:35,687
You know, I don't think
any of these people
507
00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:36,955
Are better off without me.
508
00:17:37,091 --> 00:17:38,557
- Well, it all depends
who you ask.
509
00:17:38,559 --> 00:17:40,759
They are all very happy.
- Ok. Well, you know what?
510
00:17:40,761 --> 00:17:43,027
I've had enough.
I'm ready to go back.
511
00:17:43,029 --> 00:17:44,897
- Not quite yet.
There's more.
512
00:17:45,031 --> 00:17:46,298
- Hey, mom.
Hey, dad.
513
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:50,435
Someone call for the she wolf?
[howls]
514
00:17:50,437 --> 00:17:52,504
- [laughs] I love her so much.
- So proud.
515
00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:54,439
- Vicky and wolf
have a lucy too?
516
00:17:54,441 --> 00:17:56,174
- They do.
- And she's a local cop?
517
00:17:56,310 --> 00:17:58,711
- And not a very good one.
- Think fast, mcdorky.
518
00:17:58,845 --> 00:18:00,579
- [groans]
- [laughs]
519
00:18:00,581 --> 00:18:02,981
- I got the turkey
and the giblets on that one.
520
00:18:02,983 --> 00:18:03,982
- And she's a tool.
521
00:18:04,118 --> 00:18:05,584
- Hey, lukey, drinks tonight?
522
00:18:05,719 --> 00:18:07,185
- You know it, girl.
[bell dings]
523
00:18:07,187 --> 00:18:09,053
- Are they hooking up?
- Of course.
524
00:18:09,189 --> 00:18:10,655
[laughter]
525
00:18:10,657 --> 00:18:13,458
- Lucy is definitely not
better off in either form.
526
00:18:13,594 --> 00:18:15,594
- Well, it's not
an exact science.
527
00:18:15,729 --> 00:18:17,996
- Ok.
Well, I've seen enough.
528
00:18:18,132 --> 00:18:19,464
Please, no more.
- You're sure?
529
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:21,266
- Yeah, I'm sure.
I am sure.
530
00:18:21,268 --> 00:18:22,801
Please, I want to go back.
I can't handle this.
531
00:18:22,803 --> 00:18:24,803
Please, I want to go back.
- [moaning]
532
00:18:24,805 --> 00:18:26,671
- Yeah, mom!
Get some!
533
00:18:26,673 --> 00:18:27,740
- Eddie, remember,
534
00:18:27,874 --> 00:18:30,208
You have to appreciate
the people in your crew.
535
00:18:30,210 --> 00:18:31,876
- I do. I do.
I want to go back, though.
536
00:18:32,012 --> 00:18:33,478
[both moaning]
537
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:34,813
- Hit that chip, boss.
538
00:18:34,815 --> 00:18:36,348
- [howls]
- [shouts]
539
00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:37,616
- You sure?
- Yes, I'm very sure.
540
00:18:37,751 --> 00:18:39,084
- No, no, no,
are you sure, eddie?
541
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:40,218
- Very sure.
- You're sure?
542
00:18:40,354 --> 00:18:41,553
- I'm super sure.
- [howls]
543
00:18:41,688 --> 00:18:42,887
- Super sure?
- Super sure.
544
00:18:42,889 --> 00:18:43,956
- Say it.
- I'm super sure.
545
00:18:44,091 --> 00:18:45,290
- Say it one more time.
- [howls]
546
00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:46,358
- I'm super sure.
- One more time.
547
00:18:46,493 --> 00:18:47,492
- Lawrence, please!
548
00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:48,761
- Yeah!
[whooshing]
549
00:18:48,895 --> 00:18:50,095
- [breathes heavily]
550
00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:51,496
- Oh.
- Hey, buddy.
551
00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:52,965
- There's the sleepyhead.
- Boop.
552
00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:54,366
- Hello. [laughs]
- he's there.
553
00:18:54,501 --> 00:18:56,501
- There he is.
- Let's wake up. You ok?
554
00:18:56,503 --> 00:18:57,702
- Boop. Boop.
- There he is.
555
00:18:57,704 --> 00:18:58,971
Let's sit him up.
There you go.
556
00:18:59,105 --> 00:19:00,639
[chatter]
- easy, cap.
557
00:19:00,641 --> 00:19:02,707
Easy, man.
You bumped your old noggin.
558
00:19:02,709 --> 00:19:03,575
- Yep.
559
00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:04,977
- We were really
worried about you.
560
00:19:05,112 --> 00:19:06,845
- Yeah.
- You all right?
561
00:19:06,847 --> 00:19:08,847
- I'm back.
562
00:19:08,849 --> 00:19:10,649
I think.
563
00:19:10,651 --> 00:19:11,984
- Oop, oops, oops.
- Oh, oh.
564
00:19:12,119 --> 00:19:13,852
- Hey, cap, cap.
Still at work, pal.
565
00:19:13,854 --> 00:19:15,253
Don't do that.
- Yes!
566
00:19:15,389 --> 00:19:20,058
Oh, only one testicle,
one beautiful testicle.
567
00:19:20,060 --> 00:19:21,660
[soft music]
568
00:19:21,662 --> 00:19:23,195
- What are you doing?
Hey, stop it!
569
00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:24,596
- Oh, there's that
one beautiful nut.
570
00:19:24,731 --> 00:19:26,531
- Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa,
what are you doing?
571
00:19:26,533 --> 00:19:29,001
- Yes! Oh, I could just kiss
you, you little nut, ooh.
572
00:19:29,135 --> 00:19:31,203
- At least buy a guy
a meatball sub first, huh?
573
00:19:31,338 --> 00:19:33,672
- I just had
the most horrible dream.
574
00:19:33,674 --> 00:19:35,674
I dreamt that an angel
named lawrence
575
00:19:35,676 --> 00:19:38,143
Showed me what life was like
if I was never born.
576
00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:40,879
And you were there, granny.
And you were there, vicky.
577
00:19:40,881 --> 00:19:43,015
And you were there, terry.
And you were there.
578
00:19:43,149 --> 00:19:45,083
And so were you, mickleberry.
You were there.
579
00:19:45,219 --> 00:19:46,685
And, ike, you were there too.
580
00:19:46,687 --> 00:19:48,620
- Sure, pal.
[chuckles]
581
00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:51,490
- But you were all
better off without me.
582
00:19:51,492 --> 00:19:53,625
Granny, you were
a multiplatinum-selling
583
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:55,894
Recording artist.
- People still buy albums?
584
00:19:55,896 --> 00:19:58,831
- And, mickleberry,
you cured halitosis.
585
00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:00,232
- What's halitosis?
586
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:02,167
- And, ike,
you had psychic powers.
587
00:20:02,302 --> 00:20:04,903
- Oh, man, it would be so much
cooler if I could read minds.
588
00:20:05,039 --> 00:20:06,104
But that's still cool.
589
00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:08,106
- Oh, and, terry,
you had a son.
590
00:20:08,242 --> 00:20:09,574
- A son?
591
00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:10,843
- But it was just
a boy version of lucy.
592
00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:12,044
- Really?
593
00:20:12,179 --> 00:20:14,513
- Dad!
- Oh, and, vicky,
594
00:20:14,515 --> 00:20:17,182
You were married
to wolf boykins.
595
00:20:17,184 --> 00:20:19,718
- [retches]
596
00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:21,053
- Yeah, I know.
Tell me about it.
597
00:20:21,188 --> 00:20:22,587
I'll never be able
to unsee that.
598
00:20:22,723 --> 00:20:24,589
But you had a wolf version
of lucy.
599
00:20:24,725 --> 00:20:26,458
- There were two of me?
- Yeah.
600
00:20:26,593 --> 00:20:28,326
And you were hooking up
with yourself.
601
00:20:28,462 --> 00:20:30,995
- That tracks.
- It was an incredible journey,
602
00:20:31,131 --> 00:20:34,599
Where I learned that you all
weren't taking me for granted.
603
00:20:34,735 --> 00:20:38,336
It's me that's been taking
all of you for granted.
604
00:20:38,472 --> 00:20:40,072
- Hm.
- Aww.
605
00:20:40,207 --> 00:20:43,341
- Granny, I will encourage
your parody songs from now on.
606
00:20:43,477 --> 00:20:45,009
- You know, it reminds me.
607
00:20:45,011 --> 00:20:46,811
I just came up with a parody
jingle for fizzle fruit.
608
00:20:46,947 --> 00:20:49,948
It's called "fruit 66."
listen.
609
00:20:49,950 --> 00:20:52,885
But it's a play on "route 66."
[laughter]
610
00:20:53,019 --> 00:20:54,887
- That's awesome,
which is originally
611
00:20:55,021 --> 00:20:57,021
A "weird al" yankovic song,
"route 66."
612
00:20:57,157 --> 00:20:58,690
- No, that--ike, that's not--
613
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:01,359
- Uh, yeah, it is.
Look it up, cap. [chuckles]
614
00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:02,961
- Ike, it--
I'm not going to--
615
00:21:03,097 --> 00:21:06,231
- Eddie, you need to
appreciate your group.
616
00:21:06,366 --> 00:21:08,967
Appreciate your group!
617
00:21:09,103 --> 00:21:10,435
- I do. I do.
618
00:21:10,437 --> 00:21:11,770
I appreciate them.
I really do. I do.
619
00:21:11,906 --> 00:21:13,638
- Who are you talking to,
eddie?
620
00:21:13,774 --> 00:21:14,973
- No one.
621
00:21:14,975 --> 00:21:16,575
Hey, I want to make
breakfast for everyone.
622
00:21:16,710 --> 00:21:18,977
Who's in the mood
for some eggs penisi?
623
00:21:18,979 --> 00:21:20,779
- There you go. There you go.
- Yeah!
624
00:21:20,915 --> 00:21:23,648
- Me!
- Hey, I'll take some.
625
00:21:23,784 --> 00:21:25,049
- Oh.
626
00:21:25,051 --> 00:21:27,652
Hey, who put all this crap
back in the fridge?
627
00:21:27,654 --> 00:21:30,322
- I did. I "barely" had time
to restock it.
628
00:21:30,457 --> 00:21:32,657
[laughter]
- good one.
629
00:21:32,793 --> 00:21:35,193
- [laughs] ok.
That's fine. That's fine.
630
00:21:35,329 --> 00:21:36,661
You know, I can work with this.
631
00:21:36,797 --> 00:21:37,996
I'm sure there are
some eggs in here, huh?
632
00:21:38,132 --> 00:21:39,864
Let me take a look.
633
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,400
[all exclaiming]
634
00:21:42,402 --> 00:21:44,202
- Son of a bitch.
635
00:21:44,204 --> 00:21:46,338
Oh, god.
636
00:21:46,473 --> 00:21:48,673
- Appreciate your crew.
637
00:21:48,675 --> 00:21:51,543
Appreciate your crew!
638
00:21:51,678 --> 00:21:54,012
- You know what?
Fuck that shit.
639
00:21:54,014 --> 00:21:57,349
Granny, "fruit 66" is a
stupid idea for a song.
640
00:21:57,484 --> 00:22:00,285
And, ike,
"route 66" was written
641
00:22:00,420 --> 00:22:04,222
About 20 years before weird al
yankovic was even born.
642
00:22:04,224 --> 00:22:05,557
- I didn't even say that.
643
00:22:05,692 --> 00:22:06,758
- And I thought I told
you guys to get rid of
644
00:22:06,893 --> 00:22:08,160
All this fruity seltzer water!
645
00:22:08,295 --> 00:22:10,695
- Cap, cap,
what about the angel?
646
00:22:10,831 --> 00:22:12,697
Remember?
- There is no angel.
647
00:22:12,699 --> 00:22:14,099
Like, the whole thing
was a bad dream.
648
00:22:14,234 --> 00:22:15,233
- Okay.
- You get it?
649
00:22:15,369 --> 00:22:16,301
- Yeah, I get it.
- A dream.
650
00:22:16,436 --> 00:22:19,371
[trombone whomping]
651
00:22:19,506 --> 00:22:22,440
- [shouts]
652
00:22:22,442 --> 00:22:26,578
Fuck you, eddie penisi!
653
00:22:27,247 --> 00:22:28,647
- Eh, what are you going to do?
654
00:22:28,649 --> 00:22:30,515
Mickleberry,
clean the stuff up.
655
00:22:30,651 --> 00:22:32,717
- High-five, bro.
Best of friends.
656
00:22:32,853 --> 00:22:35,554
[rock music]
[sighs]
657
00:22:36,857 --> 00:22:38,590
[rock music]
658
00:22:40,126 --> 00:22:43,528
- I'm looking at it.
I'm giving it to you.
659
00:22:43,530 --> 00:22:45,798
- A pickle.
- Nope.
660
00:22:45,932 --> 00:22:47,065
- Cucumber.
661
00:22:47,201 --> 00:22:49,601
- No. Pickle and cucumber
are the same thing.
662
00:22:49,736 --> 00:22:51,670
- Sadness.
- No, no, they're all shapes.
663
00:22:51,806 --> 00:22:53,205
- Yes, I said sandwich.
- No.
664
00:22:53,340 --> 00:22:54,807
- Did you think I said
something else?
665
00:22:54,941 --> 00:22:56,541
- Concentrate.
Press your temples harder.
666
00:22:56,543 --> 00:22:59,077
- An armadillo with a bow tie.
- No, no, no, no.
667
00:22:59,213 --> 00:23:00,879
- A bow tie, I said.
- You know what? It's not.
668
00:23:00,881 --> 00:23:02,080
- I don't think you're
concentrating because
669
00:23:02,216 --> 00:23:03,482
I have to concentrate on you.
670
00:23:03,484 --> 00:23:04,749
Then you concentrate
on me, right?
671
00:23:04,885 --> 00:23:06,418
- Let's just take
a few minutes. Take five.
672
00:23:06,553 --> 00:23:08,086
I don't think this
is working right now.
673
00:23:08,088 --> 00:23:09,954
- Delivery for
captain eddie penisi.
674
00:23:10,090 --> 00:23:12,691
- Ooh, that's me.
Ha, ha, ha, free stuff.
675
00:23:12,827 --> 00:23:14,292
- Hmm.
Wonder what it could be.
676
00:23:14,428 --> 00:23:15,694
- Don't look at those cards.
Don't peek.
677
00:23:15,696 --> 00:23:17,362
- I'm not going to.
I never have.
678
00:23:17,498 --> 00:23:18,563
- I'm looking at you.
- I know.
679
00:23:18,699 --> 00:23:20,232
I can see you.
- Here we go.
680
00:23:20,367 --> 00:23:22,100
Thank you.
681
00:23:22,236 --> 00:23:24,569
[laughs]
flavored seltzer water.
682
00:23:24,571 --> 00:23:25,637
How did you know?
683
00:23:25,772 --> 00:23:27,039
[laughter]
- gotcha.
684
00:23:27,174 --> 00:23:29,508
- Oh, yeah.
- I suppose I deserve that.
685
00:23:29,510 --> 00:23:32,110
And just to show you
that I can take a joke,
686
00:23:32,246 --> 00:23:34,979
I'm going to drink some of this
crap you guys like so much.
687
00:23:34,981 --> 00:23:36,581
- Dig in, cap.
You're going to love it.
688
00:23:36,717 --> 00:23:38,650
- There you go.
- Mm-hmm.
689
00:23:38,785 --> 00:23:40,919
Mm. Mmm.
690
00:23:41,055 --> 00:23:44,857
[sighs] with the mere mention
of raspberry sriracha.
691
00:23:44,991 --> 00:23:46,124
[ding]
692
00:23:46,260 --> 00:23:49,127
- It's a hell of a new flavor,
don't you think?
693
00:23:49,129 --> 00:23:50,262
[ominous music]
694
00:23:50,397 --> 00:23:53,398
I got you a lifetime supply.
695
00:23:53,534 --> 00:23:57,503
[maniacal laughter]
696
00:23:59,139 --> 00:24:01,306
- [screams]