1 00:00:06,505 --> 00:00:08,072 Oh, hey. What are you watching? 2 00:00:08,116 --> 00:00:10,422 Oh, nothing. Now that Malcolm's moved out, 3 00:00:10,466 --> 00:00:13,208 I'm deleting all his shows off the DVR. 4 00:00:13,251 --> 00:00:16,036 [chuckles]: 60 Minutes,time's up. 5 00:00:17,081 --> 00:00:19,040 Documentary on the rain forest? 6 00:00:19,083 --> 00:00:21,259 Rain, rain, go away. 7 00:00:21,303 --> 00:00:23,131 Friends? 8 00:00:23,174 --> 00:00:26,264 I don't recall seeing any of ourpeople on that. 9 00:00:26,308 --> 00:00:28,049 Hey, hey! 10 00:00:28,092 --> 00:00:29,572 Iwas recording that show. 11 00:00:29,615 --> 00:00:32,575 You know I love watching white people invent problems. 12 00:00:34,664 --> 00:00:36,927 I just want the DVR to feel as free as I do. 13 00:00:36,970 --> 00:00:39,625 Like, no more arguments, no more backtalk. 14 00:00:39,669 --> 00:00:42,411 The memory of Malcolm living here is fading faster 15 00:00:42,454 --> 00:00:45,849 than his butt-print on that couch. 16 00:00:45,892 --> 00:00:48,286 Well, actually, that is exactly 17 00:00:48,330 --> 00:00:50,767 what I wanted to talk to you about. 18 00:00:50,810 --> 00:00:53,378 Now that Malcolm's gone, we're gonna have 19 00:00:53,422 --> 00:00:55,641 a lot more time where's it's just... 20 00:00:55,685 --> 00:00:57,121 you and me. 21 00:00:57,165 --> 00:01:00,124 Ooh. I get it.Mm-hmm. 22 00:01:00,168 --> 00:01:03,084 So you're saying we could get freaky wherever we want to. 23 00:01:03,127 --> 00:01:05,129 What about... what about this chair? 24 00:01:05,173 --> 00:01:06,783 I mean, or the kitchen? 25 00:01:06,826 --> 00:01:08,437 Maybe over by the fireplace. 26 00:01:08,480 --> 00:01:13,137 I mean, where do you want to make our first butt-print? 27 00:01:13,181 --> 00:01:14,921 That is not what I meant. 28 00:01:14,965 --> 00:01:17,663 What I mean is, we're free to focus on us. 29 00:01:17,707 --> 00:01:19,578 You know, try new things, 30 00:01:19,622 --> 00:01:21,580 expand our horizons. 31 00:01:21,624 --> 00:01:23,147 Oh. 32 00:01:23,191 --> 00:01:25,845 Yeah, that just sounds like a fancy way of saying: 33 00:01:25,889 --> 00:01:28,413 doing stuff that I don't like. 34 00:01:29,197 --> 00:01:30,850 Aw, come on, baby. 35 00:01:30,894 --> 00:01:33,417 I was looking at community college classes we could take. 36 00:01:33,462 --> 00:01:35,159 Like here. Look. 37 00:01:35,203 --> 00:01:37,205 An Introduction to Drawing. 38 00:01:37,248 --> 00:01:41,426 [sighs] Babe, look, I got all the fun I need right here. 39 00:01:41,470 --> 00:01:43,167 I got my chair, I got my remote, 40 00:01:43,211 --> 00:01:46,170 and an empty DVR to fill with blooper shows. 41 00:01:46,214 --> 00:01:48,259 I know that God loves all His children, 42 00:01:48,303 --> 00:01:51,566 but clearly, He loves me more. 43 00:01:52,568 --> 00:01:54,178 Okay, fine. 44 00:01:54,222 --> 00:01:56,048 You could sit at home and do nothing. 45 00:01:56,093 --> 00:01:59,314 I am going out and expanding my horizons. 46 00:01:59,357 --> 00:02:00,706 [chuckles] 47 00:02:00,750 --> 00:02:03,927 I'm expanding mine, too-- right here in this chair. 48 00:02:04,928 --> 00:02:07,060 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 49 00:02:07,104 --> 00:02:08,322 ♪ Welcome to the hood. 50 00:02:12,457 --> 00:02:14,024 This is gonna be so much fun! 51 00:02:14,067 --> 00:02:16,418 [laughs]I can't believe Calvin would rather sit at home 52 00:02:16,461 --> 00:02:17,810 than come with us. 53 00:02:17,854 --> 00:02:20,030 Yeah, his idea of fun is watching blooper shows 54 00:02:20,073 --> 00:02:21,336 with his buddy Ernie. 55 00:02:21,379 --> 00:02:23,599 I just don't understand why men go so nuts 56 00:02:23,642 --> 00:02:26,645 watching other men get hit in the nuts. 57 00:02:26,689 --> 00:02:30,301 Well, his loss is my gain. 58 00:02:30,345 --> 00:02:32,302 What could be more fun than spending an evening 59 00:02:32,347 --> 00:02:33,348 with my best friend, 60 00:02:33,391 --> 00:02:35,219 doing art and drinking wine? 61 00:02:35,263 --> 00:02:36,264 Oh. 62 00:02:36,307 --> 00:02:37,482 What are you talking about? 63 00:02:37,526 --> 00:02:39,136 They're not serving wine.I know. 64 00:02:39,180 --> 00:02:41,312 But I am. 65 00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:46,404 Just when I thought I knew you, more ghetto shows up. 66 00:02:48,276 --> 00:02:51,583 Okay. Welcome to Introduction to Drawing. 67 00:02:51,627 --> 00:02:53,890 I'm your instructor, Deborah. 68 00:02:53,933 --> 00:02:55,979 I apologize in advance. 69 00:02:56,022 --> 00:02:57,588 We were supposed to kick off tonight 70 00:02:57,633 --> 00:02:59,983 sketching a bowl of fruit, but my boyfriend was too busy 71 00:03:00,026 --> 00:03:03,073 playing video games to swing by Trader Joe's. 72 00:03:04,509 --> 00:03:06,816 So instead, we're gonna skip right to figure drawing. 73 00:03:06,859 --> 00:03:08,644 Please welcome our model, 74 00:03:08,687 --> 00:03:10,080 Antonio. 75 00:03:12,735 --> 00:03:16,086 Gemma, this guy's just wearing a robe. 76 00:03:27,793 --> 00:03:29,969 Not anymore. 77 00:03:32,102 --> 00:03:34,800 Bishop takes knight. 78 00:03:34,844 --> 00:03:36,672 Or, as I like to call it, 79 00:03:36,715 --> 00:03:38,108 "bish, please." 80 00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:40,719 Well, call it what you want, but... 81 00:03:40,763 --> 00:03:42,330 checkmate. 82 00:03:42,373 --> 00:03:43,939 Ha-ha! 83 00:03:43,983 --> 00:03:46,029 Son of a bish! 84 00:03:46,072 --> 00:03:47,900 Guys, you are never gonna believe 85 00:03:47,944 --> 00:03:49,902 what I found in the basement. 86 00:03:49,946 --> 00:03:51,991 [coughs, groans] 87 00:03:52,035 --> 00:03:53,384 Um, what'd you find? 88 00:03:53,427 --> 00:03:55,256 It's an old manuscript for a book Walter wrote. 89 00:03:55,299 --> 00:03:57,301 He must have forgotten it when he moved out. 90 00:03:57,345 --> 00:03:58,389 Seriously? 91 00:03:58,433 --> 00:04:00,261 That cranky old dude wrote a book? 92 00:04:00,304 --> 00:04:01,610 What is it? 93 00:04:01,653 --> 00:04:03,829 Calling People Dummies For Dummies? 94 00:04:03,873 --> 00:04:06,223 Actually, I think it's a mystery novel. 95 00:04:06,267 --> 00:04:08,573 Check out the title. [clears throat] 96 00:04:08,617 --> 00:04:11,620 Dead Because of Murder. 97 00:04:12,447 --> 00:04:14,536 Ha! Well, if the murder weapon 98 00:04:14,579 --> 00:04:17,843 was a terrible title, I think we found it. 99 00:04:17,887 --> 00:04:19,410 [chuckles] Yeah, you know what? 100 00:04:19,454 --> 00:04:20,802 Read a little bit, Marty. 101 00:04:20,846 --> 00:04:22,935 Oh, this is gonna be hilarious. 102 00:04:22,978 --> 00:04:25,416 Okay, here we go. Chapter one. 103 00:04:25,460 --> 00:04:28,332 "Standing there in the rain, lightning streaked the sky. 104 00:04:28,376 --> 00:04:30,508 "I stared at the woman in the red dress 105 00:04:30,552 --> 00:04:31,944 "and knew three things-- 106 00:04:31,988 --> 00:04:34,947 "she was young, she was gorgeous, 107 00:04:34,991 --> 00:04:37,079 and she was dead." 108 00:04:37,863 --> 00:04:40,649 Damn, Walter, that's pretty good. 109 00:04:40,692 --> 00:04:41,867 Are you kidding me? 110 00:04:41,911 --> 00:04:43,129 It's great. 111 00:04:43,173 --> 00:04:46,045 That old son of a bish can write. 112 00:04:46,089 --> 00:04:47,829 Yeah, keep reading, Marty. 113 00:04:47,873 --> 00:04:49,179 Oh, don't worry, man, there's no way 114 00:04:49,222 --> 00:04:50,485 I'm putting this down now. 115 00:04:53,009 --> 00:04:54,663 To us.Out loud, 116 00:04:54,706 --> 00:04:56,228 Marty, come on.To us, Marty. 117 00:04:58,710 --> 00:05:00,364 [loud clack on TV] 118 00:05:00,408 --> 00:05:01,496 Oh!Ooh! 119 00:05:01,539 --> 00:05:03,454 Ooh, a bat to the crotch. 120 00:05:03,498 --> 00:05:05,804 That is hard to look at. 121 00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:07,893 Yeah, I know. Let's watch it again. 122 00:05:07,937 --> 00:05:08,807 Yeah. 123 00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:10,069 [loud clack] 124 00:05:10,113 --> 00:05:11,375 Oh!Aah! 125 00:05:11,419 --> 00:05:12,811 Oh-ho-ho!Oh... 126 00:05:12,855 --> 00:05:14,509 Hey, babe. Hi, Ernie. 127 00:05:14,552 --> 00:05:15,945 Hey, Tina. 128 00:05:15,988 --> 00:05:17,728 Hi, baby. How was your art class? 129 00:05:17,773 --> 00:05:19,949 Ugh. It was crazy. You're not gonna believe this, 130 00:05:19,992 --> 00:05:21,820 but we had a nude model. 131 00:05:21,864 --> 00:05:24,345 Nude? Oh. How nude are we talking? 132 00:05:24,388 --> 00:05:26,695 North of the border, south of the border, 133 00:05:26,738 --> 00:05:29,001 or the whole country? 134 00:05:29,045 --> 00:05:31,003 Well, let's just say I saw everything 135 00:05:31,047 --> 00:05:32,788 from sea to shining sea. 136 00:05:32,831 --> 00:05:34,355 ERNIE: Oh-ho, 137 00:05:34,398 --> 00:05:37,619 in that case, allow me to take a peruse of the map. 138 00:05:37,662 --> 00:05:39,011 Oh. Okay. 139 00:05:39,055 --> 00:05:41,362 There we go. 140 00:05:41,405 --> 00:05:43,015 Wait. Hold on. 141 00:05:43,059 --> 00:05:45,017 This ain't no damn model. 142 00:05:45,061 --> 00:05:47,019 It's a naked dude! 143 00:05:47,063 --> 00:05:48,630 What? 144 00:05:48,673 --> 00:05:51,197 I know. I mean, I was surprised, too, 145 00:05:51,241 --> 00:05:53,852 but I did a really good job. Look, Calvin. 146 00:05:53,896 --> 00:05:55,941 Uh, yeah, almost too good. 147 00:05:57,029 --> 00:05:58,509 Baby, you're not even looking at it. 148 00:05:58,553 --> 00:06:01,991 Well, I will when you draw him some pants. 149 00:06:02,034 --> 00:06:03,209 Wait. Wait, wait, wait. 150 00:06:03,253 --> 00:06:04,646 You didn't know that your wife 151 00:06:04,689 --> 00:06:07,388 was gonna be staring at a naked dude all night? 152 00:06:07,431 --> 00:06:10,739 Talk about a bat to the crotch. 153 00:06:10,782 --> 00:06:12,393 It's not like that, Ernie. 154 00:06:12,436 --> 00:06:14,264 There's nothing sexual about it. 155 00:06:14,307 --> 00:06:16,875 It's just, to an artist, he's a beautiful specimen 156 00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,399 of the human form. 157 00:06:18,442 --> 00:06:21,837 Mm-hmm. You can say it's not sexual all you want, 158 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:23,404 but all my ex-wives 159 00:06:23,447 --> 00:06:25,188 would have left me for that. 160 00:06:25,231 --> 00:06:27,103 And I just mean the picture. 161 00:06:28,103 --> 00:06:30,498 Hey, are you cool with this, Calvin? 162 00:06:30,541 --> 00:06:31,368 Well, you know... 163 00:06:31,412 --> 00:06:33,109 Of course he's cool with it. 164 00:06:33,152 --> 00:06:34,893 He's not insecure like you, Ernie. 165 00:06:34,937 --> 00:06:36,852 He's not threatened by this. 166 00:06:36,895 --> 00:06:38,027 Right, Calvin? 167 00:06:38,070 --> 00:06:39,420 Of course not.Yeah. 168 00:06:39,463 --> 00:06:42,292 Huh. Why would I be threatened by him? 169 00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:44,555 I mean, any man that works out that much 170 00:06:44,599 --> 00:06:48,254 and is willing to pose nude in front of strangers, well, 171 00:06:48,298 --> 00:06:51,388 he's the one that's insecure. 172 00:06:53,390 --> 00:06:54,739 See? 173 00:06:54,783 --> 00:06:56,698 My baby gets it. Mwah! 174 00:06:56,741 --> 00:06:58,961 [chuckles] 175 00:07:00,484 --> 00:07:01,616 What? 176 00:07:01,659 --> 00:07:05,141 Notice she took the picture with her. 177 00:07:14,933 --> 00:07:17,022 Oh, man. This is intense. 178 00:07:17,066 --> 00:07:18,459 I know. 179 00:07:18,502 --> 00:07:21,374 I may need you to walk me home tonight. 180 00:07:23,159 --> 00:07:24,465 Will you two be quiet? 181 00:07:24,508 --> 00:07:27,032 I'm about to find out who the killer is. 182 00:07:29,382 --> 00:07:31,472 Hold up. The box is empty. 183 00:07:31,515 --> 00:07:32,255 What? 184 00:07:32,298 --> 00:07:33,474 The last page is missing! 185 00:07:33,517 --> 00:07:35,476 Just like the chauffeur's left eye! 186 00:07:36,607 --> 00:07:37,608 Are you kidding me? 187 00:07:37,652 --> 00:07:40,132 No, man, the very last line says... 188 00:07:40,176 --> 00:07:43,092 uh, "Standing there, bloody knife in hand, 189 00:07:43,135 --> 00:07:45,224 was none other than..." 190 00:07:45,268 --> 00:07:47,009 And then there's no more! 191 00:07:49,315 --> 00:07:50,621 Oh, man, this sucks. 192 00:07:50,665 --> 00:07:52,449 We just spent 12 hours reading a whodunit, 193 00:07:52,493 --> 00:07:55,017 and we don't get to find out who done it? 194 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:56,975 This is so frustrating. 195 00:07:57,019 --> 00:08:01,589 O-Okay, you guys, it's not that big a deal. 196 00:08:01,632 --> 00:08:04,156 I think it's pretty obvious to all of us that the killer 197 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:05,331 was the personal chef. 198 00:08:05,375 --> 00:08:06,507 What?!What?! 199 00:08:06,550 --> 00:08:08,509 No, man, it was clearly the pool boy. 200 00:08:08,552 --> 00:08:10,206 That's why there were bloody fingerprints 201 00:08:10,249 --> 00:08:12,643 all over the inflatable swan. 202 00:08:12,687 --> 00:08:14,427 You're both crazy. 203 00:08:14,471 --> 00:08:17,735 It was obviously the bastard son who was cut out of the will, 204 00:08:17,779 --> 00:08:19,737 whose name was Will... 205 00:08:19,781 --> 00:08:21,696 which was kind of confusing for a while! 206 00:08:21,739 --> 00:08:24,220 It was definitely not Will.Of course it was Will! 207 00:08:24,263 --> 00:08:26,527 [overlapping shouting]An inflatable swan? 208 00:08:26,570 --> 00:08:28,529 Okay, okay. 209 00:08:29,878 --> 00:08:32,184 Clearly, there is only one person 210 00:08:32,228 --> 00:08:34,752 who knows for sure what the answer is. 211 00:08:34,796 --> 00:08:36,232 And that's Walter. 212 00:08:36,275 --> 00:08:38,190 Yeah, but we have no idea where he is. 213 00:08:38,233 --> 00:08:39,496 Yeah, all we know 214 00:08:39,540 --> 00:08:41,106 is he moved to a retirement community 215 00:08:41,150 --> 00:08:44,240 in Palm Springs, and there's got to be hundreds of them. 216 00:08:44,282 --> 00:08:45,763 Okay, gentlemen, well... 217 00:08:45,807 --> 00:08:48,549 sounds like we have a mystery of our own to solve. 218 00:08:48,592 --> 00:08:50,681 But first lock the door-- they just found 219 00:08:50,725 --> 00:08:53,075 the chauffeur's missing eye, and I am freakin' out! 220 00:08:59,211 --> 00:09:01,562 Oh, hey, babe. Whatcha doing? 221 00:09:01,605 --> 00:09:03,607 Working some more on my sketch. 222 00:09:03,651 --> 00:09:07,045 Oh. So you're still doing that thing I'm totally cool with 223 00:09:07,089 --> 00:09:09,570 that doesn't bother me at all? 224 00:09:11,659 --> 00:09:14,400 I was looking at it again, and thought I could do a better job 225 00:09:14,444 --> 00:09:16,098 of shading Antonio's muscles out. 226 00:09:16,141 --> 00:09:17,403 Oh. 227 00:09:17,447 --> 00:09:19,231 Antonio? 228 00:09:19,275 --> 00:09:21,756 I'm guessing you didn't get that off a name tag. 229 00:09:24,715 --> 00:09:27,805 You know, for some reason, I just can't get this right. 230 00:09:27,849 --> 00:09:29,285 Oh, well, it'll be easier 231 00:09:29,328 --> 00:09:31,374 when I see him at class tonight. 232 00:09:31,417 --> 00:09:33,332 Uh, he's gonna be there again? 233 00:09:33,376 --> 00:09:35,247 Yeah. For the next couple of sessions. 234 00:09:35,291 --> 00:09:37,380 Last night was about basic form. 235 00:09:37,423 --> 00:09:39,121 Tonight we'll get more into detail. 236 00:09:39,164 --> 00:09:41,645 Well, how much more detail do you need? 237 00:09:41,689 --> 00:09:44,387 I can already tell the guy's religion. 238 00:09:48,304 --> 00:09:50,611 Wait a second, now. What's going on? 239 00:09:50,654 --> 00:09:53,091 I thought you said you were cool with this. 240 00:09:53,135 --> 00:09:54,310 Well, I was... 241 00:09:54,353 --> 00:09:56,486 until he's got a name 242 00:09:56,529 --> 00:09:59,141 and you're doing all this shading of muscles 243 00:09:59,184 --> 00:10:00,664 and highlighting. 244 00:10:00,708 --> 00:10:03,449 You know what, I'm starting to think Ernie might be right. 245 00:10:03,493 --> 00:10:05,451 [scoffs] What? Are you serious? 246 00:10:05,495 --> 00:10:07,323 You're gonna listen to Ernie? 247 00:10:07,366 --> 00:10:09,325 That man's been married five times. 248 00:10:09,368 --> 00:10:12,720 He's got more rings than LeBron James. 249 00:10:12,763 --> 00:10:14,373 Exactly. 250 00:10:14,417 --> 00:10:16,158 Which is why he knows the signs. 251 00:10:16,201 --> 00:10:19,204 And one of them is when your wife starts hanging out 252 00:10:19,248 --> 00:10:22,207 with a dude that's hanging out. 253 00:10:23,208 --> 00:10:25,210 So what are you saying? 254 00:10:25,254 --> 00:10:28,736 I'm saying that you're not going back to that art class. 255 00:10:28,779 --> 00:10:30,302 Oh. Excuse me? 256 00:10:30,346 --> 00:10:31,739 No, I mean it, Tina. 257 00:10:31,782 --> 00:10:33,697 I don't want you spending time with this guy. 258 00:10:33,741 --> 00:10:36,308 And I don't want you telling me what I can and can't do. 259 00:10:36,352 --> 00:10:38,397 [chuckles]: Oh, isn't that rich. 260 00:10:38,441 --> 00:10:40,661 You can tell me 261 00:10:40,704 --> 00:10:41,879 what I can't do, 262 00:10:41,923 --> 00:10:44,534 but I can't tell you what you can't cannot do 263 00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:46,492 if you was trying to do something and I said, "No," 264 00:10:46,536 --> 00:10:49,278 and you said, "Yes, I can," and I said, "No, you can't." 265 00:10:51,541 --> 00:10:53,586 You know what I mean. 266 00:10:57,852 --> 00:11:00,550 No. But what I know is 267 00:11:00,593 --> 00:11:03,684 you cannot not stop me from not doing what I want! 268 00:11:04,467 --> 00:11:07,122 Wait, wait a minute. Are you going or not? 269 00:11:07,165 --> 00:11:09,646 'Cause I need to know if I won this argument. 270 00:11:16,348 --> 00:11:19,656 All right, I'm meeting Gemma for dinner, then going to art class. 271 00:11:19,700 --> 00:11:22,093 Have fun watching your stupid blooper shows. 272 00:11:22,137 --> 00:11:25,967 Well, actually, we're not watching blooper shows tonight. 273 00:11:26,010 --> 00:11:28,665 We realize we've been close-minded, 274 00:11:28,709 --> 00:11:33,670 so we've decided to partake of some art ourselves. 275 00:11:33,714 --> 00:11:35,672 Oh, really? Where? 276 00:11:35,716 --> 00:11:38,631 The Wiggle Palace on 40th Street. 277 00:11:39,763 --> 00:11:43,549 So much classier than the Jiggle Barn on 12th. 278 00:11:43,593 --> 00:11:45,116 [both laugh] 279 00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:46,596 Seriously, Calvin? 280 00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:48,511 You're trying to tell me that going to a strip club 281 00:11:48,554 --> 00:11:50,774 is the same as going to art class? 282 00:11:50,818 --> 00:11:52,254 Isn't it? 283 00:11:52,297 --> 00:11:54,430 I mean, it's like you said. 284 00:11:54,473 --> 00:11:56,911 They're all just beautiful specimens 285 00:11:56,954 --> 00:11:59,174 of human form. 286 00:11:59,217 --> 00:12:00,915 Besides, Ernie tells me there's a girl there 287 00:12:00,958 --> 00:12:03,004 by the name of Monet. 288 00:12:04,179 --> 00:12:07,748 That's right, that's right. She, uh, she works in oils. 289 00:12:07,791 --> 00:12:09,010 [chuckles] 290 00:12:09,053 --> 00:12:10,881 Fine, do what you want. 291 00:12:10,925 --> 00:12:13,536 But you're acting like a child. 292 00:12:13,579 --> 00:12:14,711 No, I'm not. 293 00:12:14,755 --> 00:12:16,495 And even if I was, it wouldn't matter, 294 00:12:16,539 --> 00:12:19,803 because the Wiggle Palace has a day care! 295 00:12:22,327 --> 00:12:24,286 All right, buddy, you ready? 296 00:12:24,329 --> 00:12:27,811 Let's go give some "mo-ney" to Monet. 297 00:12:27,855 --> 00:12:29,552 Forget it, Ernie. 298 00:12:29,595 --> 00:12:32,033 We ain't going to no damn Wiggle Palace. 299 00:12:32,076 --> 00:12:34,426 Wh-What? 300 00:12:34,470 --> 00:12:37,908 No, I was just trying to bluff Tina to make a point. 301 00:12:37,952 --> 00:12:39,692 Now I got to think of something else. 302 00:12:39,736 --> 00:12:43,305 Trust me, Calvin, just-just let her do her thing. 303 00:12:43,348 --> 00:12:45,176 She'll get over it. 304 00:12:45,220 --> 00:12:47,352 Or she'll never come home. 305 00:12:47,396 --> 00:12:50,094 I've had wives do both. 306 00:12:52,444 --> 00:12:55,056 Okay. So, our missing person 307 00:12:55,099 --> 00:12:56,840 is Walter Brown. 308 00:12:56,884 --> 00:13:00,235 Yes. Last seen driving off in a moving van 309 00:13:00,278 --> 00:13:02,803 while giving us all the finger. 310 00:13:03,934 --> 00:13:05,370 We know 311 00:13:05,414 --> 00:13:08,025 he moved to one of 87 retirement communities 312 00:13:08,069 --> 00:13:09,287 in Palm Springs, 313 00:13:09,331 --> 00:13:11,681 but that is where the trail goes cold. 314 00:13:11,724 --> 00:13:13,248 I mean, I don't know if this gives us anything, 315 00:13:13,291 --> 00:13:15,816 but I'm pretty sure Walter is left-handed. 316 00:13:15,859 --> 00:13:18,819 Or at least left-fingered. 317 00:13:18,862 --> 00:13:20,081 Wait a second. 318 00:13:20,124 --> 00:13:21,125 That's it. 319 00:13:21,169 --> 00:13:22,823 Oh, what? What's it? 320 00:13:22,866 --> 00:13:24,172 Fingers. 321 00:13:24,215 --> 00:13:26,391 "Don't Lift a Finger Moving Company." 322 00:13:26,435 --> 00:13:27,871 It was written on the side of the truck. 323 00:13:27,915 --> 00:13:29,177 We should call them. 324 00:13:29,220 --> 00:13:30,482 Yeah, but they're not gonna give out 325 00:13:30,526 --> 00:13:31,875 personal information to just anyone. 326 00:13:31,919 --> 00:13:34,878 Which is why I'm not gonna be just anyone. 327 00:13:34,922 --> 00:13:37,315 I'm gonna be Walter. 328 00:13:37,359 --> 00:13:39,927 Oh. So, you telling us 329 00:13:39,970 --> 00:13:42,494 that you're gonna do Black voice? 330 00:13:47,804 --> 00:13:50,851 On second thought, one of you should do it. 331 00:13:54,855 --> 00:13:58,423 [imitating Walter]: Yeah, hey. This is Walter Brown. 332 00:13:58,467 --> 00:14:01,296 One of you jackasses lost my damn ottoman. 333 00:14:02,558 --> 00:14:05,300 Well, where the hell did you deliver it to? 334 00:14:05,343 --> 00:14:08,042 Rancho La Vista Senior Living, 335 00:14:08,085 --> 00:14:09,957 unit 31-B. 336 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:13,612 Oh, never mind. Here it is, right under my feet. Bye. 337 00:14:14,962 --> 00:14:17,921 Boys, looks like we're going to Palm Springs. 338 00:14:17,965 --> 00:14:19,575 Hell yeah, jackasses! 339 00:14:20,750 --> 00:14:22,404 [regular voice]: Sorry, I was still in character. 340 00:14:24,014 --> 00:14:27,452 Seriously? He thinks going to a strip club 341 00:14:27,496 --> 00:14:29,585 is the same thing as going to an art class? 342 00:14:29,628 --> 00:14:32,283 I know. It's like comparing apples to oranges. 343 00:14:32,327 --> 00:14:35,547 Or, in the case of Antonio, bananas. 344 00:14:37,071 --> 00:14:39,682 Well, don't let Calvin's negativity ruin your night. 345 00:14:39,725 --> 00:14:42,903 For the next two hours, don't even think about him. 346 00:14:48,604 --> 00:14:50,649 Which suddenly became much harder to do. 347 00:14:54,610 --> 00:14:56,960 Calvin, what? What are you doing here? 348 00:14:57,004 --> 00:14:58,222 Isn't it obvious? 349 00:14:58,266 --> 00:15:00,921 I'm the model for tonight's class. 350 00:15:05,621 --> 00:15:08,015 What did you do to Antonio? 351 00:15:08,058 --> 00:15:09,451 I bought him off. 352 00:15:09,494 --> 00:15:11,801 I gave him 40 bucks and a free oil change. 353 00:15:11,844 --> 00:15:13,803 Ironically, he was so oiled up, 354 00:15:13,846 --> 00:15:15,413 he dropped the coupon. [chuckles] 355 00:15:15,457 --> 00:15:18,155 You are unbelievable. 356 00:15:18,199 --> 00:15:20,201 What's wrong, Tina? 357 00:15:20,244 --> 00:15:22,638 It's like you said. It's only art. 358 00:15:22,681 --> 00:15:27,077 And we both know I'm packing one hell of an exhibit. 359 00:15:28,296 --> 00:15:30,994 You know what? Maybe I'll just sketch my shoes tonight. 360 00:15:31,038 --> 00:15:33,561 If you need me, I'll be the one looking straight down. 361 00:15:35,303 --> 00:15:37,044 Oh, please, Calvin. 362 00:15:37,087 --> 00:15:38,480 We both know there is no way 363 00:15:38,523 --> 00:15:40,917 you're actually gonna go through with this. 364 00:15:40,961 --> 00:15:43,267 [chuckles] Oh, really? 365 00:15:48,533 --> 00:15:50,361 Okay. That's it. 366 00:15:50,405 --> 00:15:53,060 I want to talk to you in the hallway now. 367 00:15:53,103 --> 00:15:55,932 Okay. Make it quick. All right, it's cold out there, 368 00:15:55,976 --> 00:15:57,934 and I got to model in a few minutes. 369 00:16:00,067 --> 00:16:02,286 Okay, this is it. 31-B. 370 00:16:02,330 --> 00:16:03,984 I hope he's home. 371 00:16:04,027 --> 00:16:06,682 It's 8:30. Where else would he be?Are you kidding me? 372 00:16:06,725 --> 00:16:08,597 They have shuffleboard, aqua aerobics 373 00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:09,902 and a puzzle room here. 374 00:16:09,946 --> 00:16:12,601 If you over 70, this place is lit. 375 00:16:13,384 --> 00:16:14,951 [laughs]: Hey! 376 00:16:14,995 --> 00:16:16,344 Walter! 377 00:16:16,387 --> 00:16:18,955 It's us. It is nice to see you. 378 00:16:18,999 --> 00:16:20,609 What the hell are you doing here? 379 00:16:20,652 --> 00:16:22,480 When I moved out, didn't you see me 380 00:16:22,524 --> 00:16:23,916 give you the finger? 381 00:16:24,700 --> 00:16:26,963 Yes, Walter. But, you know, 382 00:16:27,007 --> 00:16:29,444 we came to tell you that we found your book 383 00:16:29,487 --> 00:16:30,880 in the basement.MALCOLM: Yeah. 384 00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:33,404 We all read it, and it was amazing. 385 00:16:33,448 --> 00:16:34,449 Really? 386 00:16:34,492 --> 00:16:36,103 Yeah. The only problem is 387 00:16:36,146 --> 00:16:37,626 when we got to the end, 388 00:16:37,669 --> 00:16:39,280 the last page was missing.DAVE: Yeah, 389 00:16:39,323 --> 00:16:40,759 which is why we need you 390 00:16:40,803 --> 00:16:42,631 to tell us who the killer is. 391 00:16:42,674 --> 00:16:44,328 Well, since you guys went through all of the trouble 392 00:16:44,372 --> 00:16:46,069 of tracking me down, the least I can do 393 00:16:46,113 --> 00:16:47,810 is tell you who it is. 394 00:16:47,853 --> 00:16:50,291 For all the cash you got in your wallets. 395 00:16:50,334 --> 00:16:52,467 What? What? 396 00:16:52,510 --> 00:16:54,469 Yeah, you heard me. My name ain't Google. 397 00:16:54,512 --> 00:16:56,036 Information ain't free. 398 00:16:57,863 --> 00:17:00,301 All right, fine. Fine. Fine. 399 00:17:00,344 --> 00:17:02,651 We will give you the money. 400 00:17:02,694 --> 00:17:04,305 DAVE: All right, Walter. 401 00:17:04,348 --> 00:17:07,003 Tell them that the killer 402 00:17:07,047 --> 00:17:08,657 was the chef. 403 00:17:08,700 --> 00:17:10,485 Oh, no, no, no. He means the pool boy. 404 00:17:10,528 --> 00:17:12,486 It was the bastard son, right? 405 00:17:12,530 --> 00:17:14,924 You're all wrong. 406 00:17:14,966 --> 00:17:17,318 The murderer... 407 00:17:17,360 --> 00:17:18,927 is the butler. 408 00:17:19,711 --> 00:17:21,713 Who? The butler?[stammers] 409 00:17:21,757 --> 00:17:23,672 Well, there's no butler in the book. 410 00:17:23,715 --> 00:17:25,021 Oh, well, sure, there is. In the very first chapter, 411 00:17:25,065 --> 00:17:26,805 he opens the door for the detective. 412 00:17:26,849 --> 00:17:28,242 But that's the only time he appears 413 00:17:28,284 --> 00:17:29,765 in the entire book. He doesn't even speak! 414 00:17:29,808 --> 00:17:32,202 Exactly. That's why he's the very last person 415 00:17:32,246 --> 00:17:34,596 you'd ever suspect. 416 00:17:34,639 --> 00:17:36,032 Pretty good, right? 417 00:17:36,076 --> 00:17:38,513 No, it's not pretty good! 418 00:17:38,556 --> 00:17:40,515 It's a "screw you" to the reader! 419 00:17:40,558 --> 00:17:42,038 Why can't it be both? 420 00:17:42,821 --> 00:17:44,432 Oh, this is ridiculous. 421 00:17:44,475 --> 00:17:45,955 Yeah, any one of us could've written 422 00:17:45,998 --> 00:17:47,391 a better ending than that. 423 00:17:47,435 --> 00:17:48,740 Yeah, maybe. 424 00:17:48,784 --> 00:17:51,482 But would anybody pay you 200 bucks to hear it? 425 00:17:52,527 --> 00:17:55,530 I didn't think so. The end. 426 00:17:57,662 --> 00:17:59,403 [groans] 427 00:17:59,447 --> 00:18:01,405 I can't believe we drove all this way for that. 428 00:18:01,449 --> 00:18:03,494 And we got to drive all the way back. 429 00:18:03,538 --> 00:18:06,149 But you know what we can do on our way home? 430 00:18:06,193 --> 00:18:07,933 We can write our own ending to the book. 431 00:18:07,977 --> 00:18:11,154 I was gonna say play "I spy," 432 00:18:11,198 --> 00:18:13,330 but that is a way better idea. 433 00:18:15,071 --> 00:18:17,291 What is going on with you? 434 00:18:17,334 --> 00:18:19,206 And why are you acting so crazy? 435 00:18:19,249 --> 00:18:22,470 No, no, what's crazy is my wife rushing out every night 436 00:18:22,513 --> 00:18:23,906 to look at a naked guy 437 00:18:23,949 --> 00:18:25,647 when she's got a perfectly good one 438 00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:27,953 sitting at home watching TV. 439 00:18:27,997 --> 00:18:29,651 You are ridiculous. 440 00:18:29,694 --> 00:18:30,956 What do you think I'm gonna do, 441 00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:32,915 run off with some model half my age? 442 00:18:32,958 --> 00:18:35,483 What do you think I am, a man? 443 00:18:36,223 --> 00:18:39,008 Of course not. I don't think you're gonna run off with him. 444 00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,444 I just liked it better 445 00:18:40,488 --> 00:18:43,143 when the only man you were thinking about was me. 446 00:18:43,186 --> 00:18:45,319 [scoffs] Are you kidding? 447 00:18:45,362 --> 00:18:48,278 Baby, you are the only man I think about. 448 00:18:48,322 --> 00:18:50,106 You know the first thing that popped in my head 449 00:18:50,150 --> 00:18:52,064 the minute that guy dropped his robe? 450 00:18:52,108 --> 00:18:55,024 Yeah, I got a good guess. 451 00:18:56,112 --> 00:18:58,114 It wasn't that. 452 00:18:58,158 --> 00:19:00,638 It was that I wish you were there with me. 453 00:19:00,682 --> 00:19:02,031 It was? 454 00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:04,338 Yeah. Then I would've seen the look on your face 455 00:19:04,381 --> 00:19:06,122 and you would've seen the look on mine, 456 00:19:06,166 --> 00:19:09,169 and we would've laughed our asses off together. 457 00:19:09,212 --> 00:19:11,997 I mean, 'cause you know when that guy took off his robe, 458 00:19:12,041 --> 00:19:14,217 I would've said something really, really hilarious. 459 00:19:14,261 --> 00:19:16,828 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. 460 00:19:16,872 --> 00:19:18,395 And then I would've laughed too loud 461 00:19:18,439 --> 00:19:20,397 and fell out on the floor.I mean, who could blame you? 462 00:19:20,441 --> 00:19:23,357 It's my biggest flaw. I'm just too damn funny. 463 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:24,923 [laughs] 464 00:19:24,967 --> 00:19:26,229 You see, babe? 465 00:19:26,273 --> 00:19:27,752 This is what I'm talking about. 466 00:19:27,796 --> 00:19:30,494 When I said I wanted to go out and do fun stuff together, 467 00:19:30,538 --> 00:19:32,931 it wasn't about the stuff. 468 00:19:32,975 --> 00:19:35,760 The fun part was doing it with you. 469 00:19:35,804 --> 00:19:37,458 Mm. 470 00:19:37,501 --> 00:19:39,199 I'm sorry, babe. 471 00:19:39,242 --> 00:19:41,549 I should've come with you. 472 00:19:41,592 --> 00:19:43,855 The next time you want to do something together, 473 00:19:43,899 --> 00:19:46,293 I promise, I will. 474 00:19:46,336 --> 00:19:48,425 Thank you.[chuckles] 475 00:19:51,298 --> 00:19:53,343 So, what do you say? You ready to get out of here? 476 00:19:53,387 --> 00:19:56,868 Yeah, but we're leaving the class without a model. 477 00:19:56,912 --> 00:19:58,087 Don't worry, I got it. 478 00:19:58,130 --> 00:19:59,349 Okay.Yeah. 479 00:20:00,176 --> 00:20:01,612 Hey, Ernie. 480 00:20:01,656 --> 00:20:04,354 You want to make 40 bucks and get a free oil change? 481 00:20:12,101 --> 00:20:13,581 Oh, damn. 482 00:20:13,624 --> 00:20:14,712 Crazy, huh? 483 00:20:14,756 --> 00:20:16,845 Oh, no.Oh, yes. 484 00:20:16,888 --> 00:20:18,760 Get out of town. 485 00:20:18,803 --> 00:20:21,153 We actually had to. 486 00:20:23,025 --> 00:20:24,592 Okay, so, what do you think? 487 00:20:24,635 --> 00:20:27,290 [chuckles] I thought it was great.[whispers]: Yes. 488 00:20:27,334 --> 00:20:28,552 Up until the ending. 489 00:20:28,596 --> 00:20:30,293 What? 490 00:20:30,337 --> 00:20:34,297 I mean, the personal chef, the pool boy andthe bastard son 491 00:20:34,341 --> 00:20:36,386 all committed the murders together? 492 00:20:36,430 --> 00:20:39,607 What idiot would come up with that? 493 00:20:41,609 --> 00:20:42,653 Are you... 494 00:20:42,697 --> 00:20:44,699 Are you kidding? It was great. 495 00:20:44,742 --> 00:20:47,310 Yeah, yeah, yeah, the ending pulled the whole story together. 496 00:20:47,354 --> 00:20:49,225 Yeah, it's way better than what Walter had. 497 00:20:49,269 --> 00:20:51,619 Well, the ending's all wrong. 498 00:20:51,662 --> 00:20:55,318 The killer was obviously the shady-ass butler. 499 00:20:55,362 --> 00:20:57,059 I knew that 500 00:20:57,102 --> 00:20:58,843 the minute he opened the door. 501 00:21:03,239 --> 00:21:06,982 Captioning sponsored by CBS 502 00:21:07,025 --> 00:21:08,288 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org