1 00:00:14,513 --> 00:00:16,646 Oh, Lord, not today. 2 00:00:16,689 --> 00:00:18,865 Hey, Calvin, greetings... 3 00:00:18,909 --> 00:00:21,172 from the future. 4 00:00:21,216 --> 00:00:23,435 Goodbye... from the now. 5 00:00:23,479 --> 00:00:25,350 Just checking out this sweet ride 6 00:00:25,394 --> 00:00:27,309 to make sure it's safe for Grover. 7 00:00:27,352 --> 00:00:29,746 Have you fallenon your ass yet? 8 00:00:29,789 --> 00:00:31,313 Not yet. 9 00:00:31,356 --> 00:00:33,706 Oh, well, then,looks like I have a few minutes. 10 00:00:33,750 --> 00:00:38,189 Now, I always test out Grover's toys before I give them to him. 11 00:00:38,233 --> 00:00:39,582 I've swallowed every size Lego there is 12 00:00:39,625 --> 00:00:41,366 to make sure they're not a choking hazard. 13 00:00:41,410 --> 00:00:42,715 Turns out, some of them are. 14 00:00:44,761 --> 00:00:46,589 Dave, I got to get to work,so if you're gonna fall, 15 00:00:46,632 --> 00:00:48,112 you know, let's make it happen. 16 00:00:48,156 --> 00:00:49,766 Actually, 17 00:00:49,809 --> 00:00:52,464 I'm starting to get the hang of this thing. 18 00:00:52,508 --> 00:00:54,466 It's a lot easier than it looks! 19 00:00:54,510 --> 00:00:56,381 Whoa, whoa! Dave, watch out! 20 00:00:56,425 --> 00:00:58,122 [horn blaring, tires squealing]Oh! 21 00:00:58,166 --> 00:01:00,168 [thud] 22 00:01:01,517 --> 00:01:03,475 Hey, man, are you all right? 23 00:01:03,519 --> 00:01:04,911 Yes, but... [scoffs] 24 00:01:04,955 --> 00:01:07,349 Did you see that idiot out there? 25 00:01:07,392 --> 00:01:09,438 Yeah, that speeding caralmost hit him. 26 00:01:10,526 --> 00:01:12,876 Are you sure you're okay? 27 00:01:12,919 --> 00:01:14,704 Yeah, I'm-I'm fine, thanks. 28 00:01:14,747 --> 00:01:17,663 Well, good. Well, look,I'm late for work, but, um, 29 00:01:17,707 --> 00:01:19,578 this was totally worth it. 30 00:01:21,580 --> 00:01:23,495 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 31 00:01:23,539 --> 00:01:24,670 ♪ Welcome to the hood. 32 00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:32,765 Oh, hey, Dave. 33 00:01:32,809 --> 00:01:34,637 Hey, Calvin. I need your signature. 34 00:01:34,680 --> 00:01:36,421 I told you, I am not autographing 35 00:01:36,465 --> 00:01:38,249 that picture of us at Benihanas. 36 00:01:38,293 --> 00:01:41,209 I'm not here for that. 37 00:01:41,252 --> 00:01:43,167 But FYI, everyone else at the table signed it. 38 00:01:44,299 --> 00:01:45,561 Look, I'm sorry, Dave. 39 00:01:45,604 --> 00:01:47,215 I don't want Calvin signing anything. 40 00:01:47,258 --> 00:01:49,478 I'm still trying to get him outof that damn record club. 41 00:01:50,479 --> 00:01:51,741 Three years and 20 more CDs, 42 00:01:51,784 --> 00:01:53,177 and I'm scot-free. 43 00:01:54,831 --> 00:01:57,790 Well, you know, actually, after yesterday, 44 00:01:57,834 --> 00:01:59,444 I decided to do something about all the speeders. 45 00:01:59,488 --> 00:02:01,272 It turns out there's a new navigation app 46 00:02:01,316 --> 00:02:03,492 that's sending cars downour street to beat the traffic. 47 00:02:03,535 --> 00:02:05,537 You know, I usedone of those things once. 48 00:02:05,581 --> 00:02:07,452 The stupid thing told me 49 00:02:07,496 --> 00:02:09,976 to drive throughsomeone's backyard. 50 00:02:10,020 --> 00:02:12,805 But on the plus side,I saved about three minutes. 51 00:02:12,849 --> 00:02:14,807 Well, you know, 52 00:02:14,851 --> 00:02:17,288 I did some research, and the city will put in a speed bump 53 00:02:17,332 --> 00:02:19,247 if I get a signature from everyone on the street. 54 00:02:19,290 --> 00:02:20,509 You're my first stop. 55 00:02:20,552 --> 00:02:22,554 [chuckles] And your last one. 56 00:02:23,860 --> 00:02:26,689 A white guy goingdoor-to-door for signatures 57 00:02:26,732 --> 00:02:27,951 in this neighborhood? 58 00:02:27,994 --> 00:02:30,432 Nice knowing you, Dave. 59 00:02:30,475 --> 00:02:32,434 What Calvin is trying to say-- 60 00:02:32,477 --> 00:02:35,480 people around here are a little suspicious of getting scammed. 61 00:02:35,524 --> 00:02:37,613 You know? Dwayne Wilson thought he was signing up 62 00:02:37,656 --> 00:02:39,876 for free HBO and ended up in the Marines. 63 00:02:41,312 --> 00:02:43,358 Poor bastard just made colonel. 64 00:02:46,056 --> 00:02:47,884 Well, if door-to-door 65 00:02:47,927 --> 00:02:49,625 isn't gonna work, what should I do? 66 00:02:49,668 --> 00:02:51,540 Well, first,if you want people 67 00:02:51,583 --> 00:02:53,019 to sign anything around here, 68 00:02:53,063 --> 00:02:55,761 you got to earn their trust. Mm. 69 00:02:55,805 --> 00:02:57,067 Well, how do I do that? 70 00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:59,025 Well, I mean, they're all individuals, Dave. 71 00:02:59,069 --> 00:03:02,725 For example,Trey likes to talk about sports 72 00:03:02,768 --> 00:03:05,902 and how paternity tests can be wrong sometimes. 73 00:03:07,817 --> 00:03:10,515 And Old Miss Kim likestalking about Bingo, her garden 74 00:03:10,559 --> 00:03:13,562 and how her milkshakebrings all the boys to the yard. 75 00:03:15,868 --> 00:03:17,522 And whatever you do, 76 00:03:17,566 --> 00:03:21,309 do not ask Little Hatchet how she got her nickname. 77 00:03:21,352 --> 00:03:23,702 Or why she got a divorce, but they're 78 00:03:23,746 --> 00:03:25,791 basically both the same story.Basically the same story. 79 00:03:28,925 --> 00:03:31,449 Man, it sounds like I've bit offmore than I can chew. 80 00:03:31,493 --> 00:03:34,670 This is that Lego fireman all over again. 81 00:03:34,713 --> 00:03:36,715 Dave, just invite everybody over, 82 00:03:36,759 --> 00:03:38,587 give them some food, and they'll sign. 83 00:03:38,630 --> 00:03:40,763 It'll only work if you do one thing. 84 00:03:41,459 --> 00:03:44,332 Feed 'em catfish and cornbread. 85 00:03:44,375 --> 00:03:45,768 Why that? 86 00:03:45,811 --> 00:03:47,987 Because that's what I'm in the mood for. 87 00:03:56,561 --> 00:03:58,520 Hey, G-man, 88 00:03:58,563 --> 00:04:00,086 what are you doing? 89 00:04:00,130 --> 00:04:02,741 Just playing soccer in my head. 90 00:04:02,785 --> 00:04:04,395 Hey, I just scored! 91 00:04:05,962 --> 00:04:08,399 Well, I used to pretendlike that in my head. 92 00:04:08,443 --> 00:04:10,096 Except instead of soccer,it was girls. 93 00:04:10,140 --> 00:04:11,620 [both laugh] 94 00:04:11,663 --> 00:04:13,491 Yeah, but you never scored. 95 00:04:14,797 --> 00:04:16,799 So, why are you just pretending to play 96 00:04:16,842 --> 00:04:19,105 when you got this whole lawn right here? 97 00:04:19,149 --> 00:04:20,933 Since my dad almost got hit by a car, 98 00:04:20,977 --> 00:04:22,761 my mom won't let me play near the street. 99 00:04:22,805 --> 00:04:24,502 She's being crazy. 100 00:04:24,546 --> 00:04:27,331 No, I just think she's beingcautious and protective. 101 00:04:27,375 --> 00:04:28,985 No, she's being crazy. Watch. 102 00:04:31,422 --> 00:04:33,859 Grover, I told you to stay on the porch!Whoa! 103 00:04:36,166 --> 00:04:39,082 Wow, Gemma. You got here before your voice did. 104 00:04:39,125 --> 00:04:40,692 [sighs] Sorry. 105 00:04:40,736 --> 00:04:42,564 I'm just so worried about Grover getting hurt. 106 00:04:42,607 --> 00:04:45,131 You know, with all the cars zipping up and down the street. 107 00:04:45,175 --> 00:04:46,655 Yeah, we get it. 108 00:04:46,698 --> 00:04:48,831 Our mom was afraid of a lot of stuff, too. 109 00:04:48,874 --> 00:04:51,094 We spent half our childhood locked up like Grover here 110 00:04:51,137 --> 00:04:53,139 in porch jail.[laughs] 111 00:04:53,183 --> 00:04:55,446 Yeah, she put us in therefor earthquakes, pit bulls, 112 00:04:55,490 --> 00:04:56,969 that guywith the ice cream truck 113 00:04:57,013 --> 00:04:59,015 that never hadany ice cream. 114 00:05:03,193 --> 00:05:05,935 Well, hey, we are goingto check out the Pasadena fair. 115 00:05:05,978 --> 00:05:08,154 Why don't you let us take Grover with us? 116 00:05:08,198 --> 00:05:10,592 Can I, Mom, please? 117 00:05:10,635 --> 00:05:12,594 I don't know. 118 00:05:12,637 --> 00:05:15,161 Do you promise notto do anything dangerous? 119 00:05:15,205 --> 00:05:16,641 Oh, absolutely. 120 00:05:16,685 --> 00:05:18,164 I guarantee we will have 121 00:05:18,208 --> 00:05:21,864 a no-fun, danger-free, super-boring time. 122 00:05:21,907 --> 00:05:25,389 Uh, I'm not sure I want to go anymore. 123 00:05:27,217 --> 00:05:29,654 Hey, zip it, kid, we're trying to break you out. 124 00:05:34,833 --> 00:05:36,182 I haven't 125 00:05:36,226 --> 00:05:37,749 seen this much of the block in one place 126 00:05:37,793 --> 00:05:39,751 since Colonel Wilson got home from Iraq. 127 00:05:39,795 --> 00:05:41,666 [laughs] 128 00:05:41,710 --> 00:05:43,886 And everyone isloving my food. 129 00:05:43,929 --> 00:05:47,063 No one's even noticed thatthe catfish is actually tofu. 130 00:05:47,106 --> 00:05:49,892 Uh-uh. This ain't right. 131 00:05:53,112 --> 00:05:55,201 Calvin, you were right.This was the perfect way 132 00:05:55,245 --> 00:05:57,769 to get the whole streeton board for the speed bump. 133 00:05:57,813 --> 00:05:59,684 What can I say, Dave? These are my people. 134 00:05:59,728 --> 00:06:01,077 I love them, and they love me. 135 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:03,122 Out of the way, jackass. 136 00:06:04,907 --> 00:06:07,431 Who's that?Oh, that's Walter. 137 00:06:07,475 --> 00:06:09,520 That's the jerk that lives on the other side of me. 138 00:06:09,564 --> 00:06:11,783 Oh, man, I've never seen him outside of the house before. 139 00:06:11,827 --> 00:06:13,872 Yeah, because he only comes out at night, 140 00:06:13,916 --> 00:06:16,440 like bats and vampires. 141 00:06:16,484 --> 00:06:19,487 Well, now that everybody's here,let's... let's get started. 142 00:06:19,530 --> 00:06:24,448 Okay, uh, if I could have everyone's attention, please. 143 00:06:24,492 --> 00:06:27,973 An easel? Is he gonna talk abouta speed bump or paint one? 144 00:06:28,017 --> 00:06:29,497 [laughs] 145 00:06:29,540 --> 00:06:31,063 Dave lovesgiving presentations. 146 00:06:31,107 --> 00:06:32,587 One time I asked him why, 147 00:06:32,630 --> 00:06:35,981 and he answeredwith a ten-minute presentation. 148 00:06:36,025 --> 00:06:38,593 Okay, now, I don't want to taketoo much of your time, 149 00:06:38,636 --> 00:06:40,159 so I'll just get right to it. 150 00:06:42,553 --> 00:06:44,120 Pasadena. 151 00:06:46,644 --> 00:06:49,517 Jewel of the San Gabriel Valley. 152 00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:51,954 Established in 1874, but, you know, 153 00:06:51,997 --> 00:06:53,738 oddly, not incorporated until... 154 00:06:53,782 --> 00:06:56,088 How long is this gonna take? 155 00:06:57,263 --> 00:06:59,657 I have plans with a gentleman tonight, 156 00:06:59,701 --> 00:07:03,008 and I'm hoping he's not gonna be a gentleman. 157 00:07:03,052 --> 00:07:05,489 LITTLE HATCHET:Yeah. 158 00:07:05,533 --> 00:07:08,710 And I got a cable guy coming between now and Friday. 159 00:07:10,842 --> 00:07:12,888 Hey, hey, Dave, you-you maywant to speed this up. 160 00:07:12,931 --> 00:07:14,716 Yeah, got it. Okay, uh, 161 00:07:14,759 --> 00:07:16,848 skipping the Industrial Revolution, 162 00:07:16,892 --> 00:07:19,895 the sinking of the Titanic, uh, World War I... 163 00:07:22,201 --> 00:07:25,596 The automobile. 164 00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:27,119 I'm out. 165 00:07:27,163 --> 00:07:29,121 It's not worththe free food. 166 00:07:29,165 --> 00:07:30,601 I can come over earlier. 167 00:07:30,645 --> 00:07:32,298 Got to go. 168 00:07:32,342 --> 00:07:34,997 Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay. All right, hold up, everybody. 169 00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:36,607 Come on now. 170 00:07:36,651 --> 00:07:39,305 I want to walk out on Dave just as much as you do, 171 00:07:39,349 --> 00:07:42,308 but he actually has something important to say. 172 00:07:42,352 --> 00:07:45,660 More important than this sweet piece of meat right here? 173 00:07:49,185 --> 00:07:51,709 Okay, all right, guys. 174 00:07:51,753 --> 00:07:53,058 Look, we've all seen how fast 175 00:07:53,102 --> 00:07:55,017 these cars have beengoing down our streets. 176 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:56,801 And I think it's timewe do something about it. 177 00:07:56,845 --> 00:07:58,281 That's true.WOMAN: You got a point. 178 00:07:58,324 --> 00:08:00,022 That is true.CALVIN: Hey, come on out here, Dave. 179 00:08:00,065 --> 00:08:01,545 Come on now. Come on now. 180 00:08:01,589 --> 00:08:02,894 Thank you, Calvin, and, look, 181 00:08:02,938 --> 00:08:05,070 I'll-I'll cut right to the chase. 182 00:08:05,114 --> 00:08:07,551 To quote Henry Ford...Oh, you know what? 183 00:08:07,595 --> 00:08:10,162 To quote Calvin Butler,if you sign, you can leave. 184 00:08:10,206 --> 00:08:12,208 [overlapping chatter] 185 00:08:14,036 --> 00:08:16,168 ♪ 186 00:08:16,212 --> 00:08:18,344 So, how's thatdeep-fried pickle? 187 00:08:18,388 --> 00:08:21,957 It's pretty disgusting. Um, 188 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,872 some things should not be battered and put on a stick. 189 00:08:23,915 --> 00:08:25,177 [laughs] 190 00:08:25,221 --> 00:08:28,616 Ooh, deep-fried butter. 191 00:08:28,659 --> 00:08:30,705 [ride rumbling][excited shouting] 192 00:08:30,748 --> 00:08:32,184 Whoa!Oh. 193 00:08:32,228 --> 00:08:34,752 Can we go on that roller coaster? 194 00:08:34,796 --> 00:08:35,971 Uh, sorry, little man. We promised your mom 195 00:08:36,014 --> 00:08:37,363 we wouldn't do anything dangerous. 196 00:08:37,407 --> 00:08:39,801 And we already pushed our luckwith the petting zoo. 197 00:08:39,844 --> 00:08:41,672 That pygmy goat triedto eat my jacket. 198 00:08:41,716 --> 00:08:44,849 Hey, how about we go on the Ferris wheel? 199 00:08:44,893 --> 00:08:48,200 Ferris wheel? That's the lamest ride here. 200 00:08:48,244 --> 00:08:50,202 Well, we can go back to the bounce house. 201 00:08:50,246 --> 00:08:52,727 And if you promiseto be careful, 202 00:08:52,770 --> 00:08:55,773 this timewe'll let you jump. 203 00:08:55,817 --> 00:08:58,602 Fine, we'll go on the stupid Ferris wheel. 204 00:08:58,646 --> 00:08:59,995 But you guys are boring. 205 00:09:01,039 --> 00:09:02,867 [chuckles] 206 00:09:02,911 --> 00:09:05,000 That kid's not as cute as he used to be. 207 00:09:07,176 --> 00:09:08,830 Thank you. 208 00:09:08,873 --> 00:09:10,222 Oh, thank you so much. 209 00:09:10,266 --> 00:09:12,703 Yeah, good.Oh, here you go. 210 00:09:12,747 --> 00:09:14,400 Now, you surethis not for the Marines? 211 00:09:14,444 --> 00:09:16,402 Hmm. 212 00:09:16,446 --> 00:09:18,796 You'd be a lot safer joining the Marines 213 00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:20,885 than going over to Miss Kim's tonight. 214 00:09:22,887 --> 00:09:25,237 I know. Pray for me. 215 00:09:28,458 --> 00:09:30,329 Hey, thanks for backing me up, Calvin. 216 00:09:30,373 --> 00:09:32,114 Everyone's signing the petition. 217 00:09:32,157 --> 00:09:33,855 Well, nothing'smore important to me 218 00:09:33,898 --> 00:09:35,421 than the safetyof our neighborhood. 219 00:09:35,465 --> 00:09:37,423 I'll do anythingto protect these kids. 220 00:09:37,467 --> 00:09:39,121 Oh, hey, Walter. If you could just sign 221 00:09:39,164 --> 00:09:40,426 on the last spot right there. 222 00:09:40,470 --> 00:09:43,081 Oh, yeah, I'd...I-I'd be happy to 223 00:09:43,125 --> 00:09:46,911 if Calvin finally agrees to movehis fence off of my property. 224 00:09:47,912 --> 00:09:49,871 Well, Dave, we tried. 225 00:10:00,142 --> 00:10:01,970 [groans] 226 00:10:02,013 --> 00:10:04,015 Hey, Calvin, what was that all about? 227 00:10:04,059 --> 00:10:08,237 That fool thinks my fence issix inches onto his property. 228 00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:11,632 Is it?Whose side are you on, Dave? 229 00:10:12,937 --> 00:10:15,026 Calvin, Walter's the last signature we need 230 00:10:15,070 --> 00:10:16,680 to get the speed bump. 231 00:10:16,724 --> 00:10:18,769 Look, that fence has been theresince I moved in, 232 00:10:18,813 --> 00:10:20,292 and I'm not moving it now. 233 00:10:20,336 --> 00:10:23,295 Plus, if I give in to him once,it won't stop there. 234 00:10:23,339 --> 00:10:26,995 I'm telling you, Dave, kindness is a slippery slope. 235 00:10:28,736 --> 00:10:30,738 Well, okay, Calvin, that's not true. 236 00:10:30,781 --> 00:10:33,305 Oh, yes, it is. I said hello to you once, 237 00:10:33,349 --> 00:10:35,046 and look at us now. 238 00:10:37,092 --> 00:10:38,267 Okay, well, if you won't move, 239 00:10:38,310 --> 00:10:39,747 then how are we gonna get the speed bump? 240 00:10:39,790 --> 00:10:42,967 Oh, that's easy. Gonna wait for him to die. 241 00:10:43,011 --> 00:10:46,188 Hey, besides, I got youall those other signatures. 242 00:10:46,231 --> 00:10:47,798 Yeah, which mean absolutely nothing 243 00:10:47,842 --> 00:10:49,321 if we don't get Walter's. 244 00:10:49,365 --> 00:10:50,932 Well, I'm sorry, Dave. 245 00:10:50,975 --> 00:10:52,847 If it makes you feel any better, 246 00:10:52,890 --> 00:10:55,240 I'll sign the picture of us at Benihana. 247 00:10:56,241 --> 00:10:57,460 It's too late. 248 00:10:57,503 --> 00:10:59,157 I already forged it. 249 00:10:59,201 --> 00:11:00,245 ♪ 250 00:11:03,901 --> 00:11:05,207 Ha-ha! 251 00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:06,774 Wow! What a view! 252 00:11:06,817 --> 00:11:08,906 Yeah, check this out, little man. 253 00:11:08,950 --> 00:11:11,213 You can see everything from up here. 254 00:11:11,256 --> 00:11:13,519 Like how much fun they're having over there 255 00:11:13,563 --> 00:11:15,739 on the roller coaster! 256 00:11:15,783 --> 00:11:17,219 Are you kidding? 257 00:11:17,262 --> 00:11:18,829 That doesn't looklike much fun at all. 258 00:11:18,873 --> 00:11:20,048 [Marty and Malcolm chuckle] 259 00:11:20,091 --> 00:11:21,266 We are totally coming back heretomorrow. 260 00:11:22,180 --> 00:11:23,878 Whoa! Whoa! 261 00:11:23,921 --> 00:11:25,183 Whoa!Hey, now, hey! 262 00:11:25,227 --> 00:11:26,358 What just happened? 263 00:11:26,402 --> 00:11:27,708 Uh, I don't know. 264 00:11:27,751 --> 00:11:29,840 Hey, maybe they're just letting more riders on. 265 00:11:29,884 --> 00:11:31,102 Uh, or... 266 00:11:31,146 --> 00:11:32,538 maybe the motorjust caught on fire, 267 00:11:32,582 --> 00:11:35,150 and the operator triedto put it out with his beer! 268 00:11:35,193 --> 00:11:36,978 Seriously? 269 00:11:37,021 --> 00:11:39,197 Hey, hey, look, it's okay, little man. 270 00:11:39,241 --> 00:11:41,417 All right? Everything is gonna be fine. 271 00:11:41,460 --> 00:11:42,984 It's not fine. 272 00:11:43,027 --> 00:11:44,376 It's awesome! 273 00:11:44,420 --> 00:11:46,030 What? Oh!Finally, some realfun. 274 00:11:46,074 --> 00:11:48,163 Whoa!No! 275 00:11:49,164 --> 00:11:50,818 ♪ 276 00:11:52,167 --> 00:11:53,777 Calvin Butler. 277 00:11:53,821 --> 00:11:55,866 What is wrong with you? 278 00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:57,476 I would say nothing, but I'm sure 279 00:11:57,520 --> 00:11:59,087 you're about to tell me different. 280 00:12:00,305 --> 00:12:02,133 You're damn right I am. 281 00:12:02,177 --> 00:12:04,222 Dave just told mewhat happened. 282 00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,050 I cannot believe after all of these years 283 00:12:06,094 --> 00:12:08,052 you're still fighting over that stupid fence. 284 00:12:08,096 --> 00:12:11,229 Why does Walter care so much about six inches? 285 00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:12,883 Well, why do you care so much? 286 00:12:12,927 --> 00:12:14,450 It's six inches. 287 00:12:16,017 --> 00:12:17,932 Is it about the money? 288 00:12:17,975 --> 00:12:20,412 I mean, it can't bethat expensive to move a fence. 289 00:12:20,456 --> 00:12:22,414 No, it's not about that. It's about the principle. 290 00:12:22,458 --> 00:12:24,199 And it's like my father always said: 291 00:12:24,242 --> 00:12:27,028 "A man's fence is a man's fence." 292 00:12:27,071 --> 00:12:29,595 When did your father say that? 293 00:12:29,639 --> 00:12:31,989 Whose side are you on, Tina? 294 00:12:32,033 --> 00:12:34,252 Is your pridemore important 295 00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:37,081 than the safety of the kids in this neighborhood? 296 00:12:37,125 --> 00:12:40,084 Nah, babe. Don't try to make this whole speed bump thing 297 00:12:40,128 --> 00:12:41,564 about safety. 298 00:12:44,219 --> 00:12:45,350 Okay... 299 00:12:45,394 --> 00:12:47,439 when Malcolm and Marty were little, 300 00:12:47,483 --> 00:12:50,268 you did everything in your power to keep them safe. 301 00:12:50,312 --> 00:12:52,488 You even used to make Marty wear a helmet 302 00:12:52,531 --> 00:12:54,490 just to play hide-and-seek. 303 00:12:54,533 --> 00:12:57,188 I made him wear that thingall the time. 304 00:12:57,232 --> 00:12:59,538 The kid had no balance. 305 00:12:59,582 --> 00:13:01,323 [sighs] Okay. 306 00:13:01,366 --> 00:13:03,847 When Malcolm said that he was old enough 307 00:13:03,891 --> 00:13:06,545 to take his bike to the park, you followed him in your car 308 00:13:06,589 --> 00:13:08,460 just to make sure he got there safely. 309 00:13:08,504 --> 00:13:09,592 I had to. 310 00:13:09,635 --> 00:13:11,942 He was pulling Marty in a wagon. 311 00:13:11,986 --> 00:13:14,423 That boy fell out every two blocks. 312 00:13:15,641 --> 00:13:17,948 [sighs] 313 00:13:17,992 --> 00:13:19,210 Come on, babe. 314 00:13:19,254 --> 00:13:20,516 You love Grover. 315 00:13:21,647 --> 00:13:25,129 Doesn't he deserve to be just as safe as our boys were? 316 00:13:26,174 --> 00:13:27,610 Yeah, I guess. 317 00:13:27,653 --> 00:13:29,046 [chuckles] 318 00:13:29,090 --> 00:13:31,135 That's my big papa bear. 319 00:13:31,179 --> 00:13:33,529 Taking careof all the little cubs. 320 00:13:35,096 --> 00:13:36,924 Yeah, you know me, huh? 321 00:13:36,967 --> 00:13:38,969 Always looking out for the neighborhood kids. 322 00:13:39,013 --> 00:13:40,275 Mmm. 323 00:13:40,318 --> 00:13:41,624 Oh. You know what?What? 324 00:13:41,667 --> 00:13:43,278 That gives me an idea.What? 325 00:13:43,321 --> 00:13:46,107 I can underpay them to move the fence. 326 00:13:46,150 --> 00:13:48,152 ♪ 327 00:13:49,937 --> 00:13:52,113 [whoops] Yeah! 328 00:13:52,156 --> 00:13:53,679 [exclaiming] 329 00:13:53,723 --> 00:13:56,073 Whoa, whoa, whoa! You have got to cut that out, little man. 330 00:13:56,117 --> 00:13:57,988 You have got to stop.[groans] 331 00:13:58,032 --> 00:14:01,862 This rocking is not helpingthat deep-fried pizza stay down. 332 00:14:03,124 --> 00:14:05,648 What? When did you eat that? 333 00:14:05,691 --> 00:14:08,172 When you guys were in the bathroom. 334 00:14:09,217 --> 00:14:10,522 You two are no fun. 335 00:14:10,566 --> 00:14:12,524 You're just as bad as my mom. 336 00:14:12,568 --> 00:14:15,136 Hey, look, don't be so hard on her, okay? 337 00:14:15,179 --> 00:14:17,007 She just wants to keep you safe. 338 00:14:17,051 --> 00:14:19,575 Why? I'm not a baby. 339 00:14:19,618 --> 00:14:21,316 Yeah, I know. The only reason 340 00:14:21,359 --> 00:14:23,318 your mom is so overprotective 341 00:14:23,361 --> 00:14:25,973 is because of how much she cares about you. 342 00:14:26,016 --> 00:14:28,192 Yeah, i-if you see a kid having too much fun, 343 00:14:28,236 --> 00:14:30,238 that means his mom doesn't love him. 344 00:14:31,630 --> 00:14:34,285 So, that kid in front of the roller coaster 345 00:14:34,329 --> 00:14:36,592 with his hands up in the air... 346 00:14:36,635 --> 00:14:39,943 You mean the one eating that corn dog with no shirt on? 347 00:14:39,987 --> 00:14:42,990 Yeah. His mama don't even know he's here. 348 00:14:44,208 --> 00:14:46,297 Wow. That's sad. 349 00:14:46,341 --> 00:14:47,951 Exactly. 350 00:14:47,995 --> 00:14:50,954 So every time your mom tells you, stop running, 351 00:14:50,998 --> 00:14:53,304 tie your shoes, or be careful, 352 00:14:53,348 --> 00:14:56,568 what she's really saying is she loves you. 353 00:14:56,612 --> 00:14:59,093 I guess I'm pretty lucky. 354 00:14:59,136 --> 00:15:00,964 You sure are. 355 00:15:01,008 --> 00:15:03,967 Which means she's gonna besuper mad when she finds out 356 00:15:04,011 --> 00:15:05,316 you got me stuck up here. 357 00:15:06,578 --> 00:15:08,537 Uh, no, she won't, no, she won't. 358 00:15:08,580 --> 00:15:10,756 [forced chuckle]: Because we're fine. Right, Marty? 359 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,280 Yeah, yeah. We-We're-we're totally safe. 360 00:15:12,323 --> 00:15:13,585 This kind of thing happens all the time. 361 00:15:13,629 --> 00:15:14,847 [calliope music playing] 362 00:15:14,891 --> 00:15:17,111 Oh, thank you, Jesus!Ah, we are gonna live! 363 00:15:19,243 --> 00:15:21,680 Thanks so much for doing this, Calvin. 364 00:15:21,724 --> 00:15:23,595 Did Tina change your mind? 365 00:15:23,639 --> 00:15:26,424 No. I was alwaysgonna do it. 366 00:15:26,468 --> 00:15:28,470 I just needed to knowhow committed youwere. 367 00:15:29,775 --> 00:15:31,995 Well, you're doing the right thing, 368 00:15:32,039 --> 00:15:34,041 and I, for one, appreciate it. 369 00:15:34,084 --> 00:15:36,086 [chuckles] Do youappreciate it enough 370 00:15:36,130 --> 00:15:38,480 to give me six incheson yourproperty? 371 00:15:38,523 --> 00:15:40,090 Sorry, Calvin. 372 00:15:40,134 --> 00:15:42,005 It's like my dad used to say: 373 00:15:42,049 --> 00:15:43,964 "A man's fence is a man's fence." 374 00:15:47,402 --> 00:15:49,665 Damn. You're not Miss Kim. 375 00:15:51,319 --> 00:15:53,625 Look, Walter, I need to talk to you. 376 00:15:53,669 --> 00:15:55,497 Oh, wha-what are you here to steal now? 377 00:15:55,540 --> 00:15:57,151 My Wi-Fi password? 378 00:15:57,194 --> 00:15:58,500 I'll give youa hint. 379 00:15:58,543 --> 00:16:01,764 It's "Calvin" and four other letters. 380 00:16:02,808 --> 00:16:04,506 Look, man, 381 00:16:04,549 --> 00:16:07,639 I just came over here to say if you sign Dave's petition, 382 00:16:07,683 --> 00:16:09,598 I'll move the damn fence. 383 00:16:09,641 --> 00:16:12,340 Great. I was waiting for you to die. 384 00:16:13,645 --> 00:16:16,039 Walter, I really appreciate it. 385 00:16:16,083 --> 00:16:20,000 Just sign right under where Treywrote "Not joining Marines." 386 00:16:20,870 --> 00:16:22,524 Okay. 387 00:16:22,567 --> 00:16:24,656 But actually, since it took you this long, 388 00:16:24,700 --> 00:16:27,137 maybe I should charge you a little interest. 389 00:16:27,181 --> 00:16:29,661 How about we move that fence a full foot? 390 00:16:29,705 --> 00:16:31,054 What? 391 00:16:31,098 --> 00:16:33,143 I got a full foot for you. 392 00:16:33,187 --> 00:16:34,666 You know...Oh, okay, all right, all right. 393 00:16:34,710 --> 00:16:36,059 Calvin, calm down. 394 00:16:36,103 --> 00:16:37,539 We need that speed bump. Please. 395 00:16:37,582 --> 00:16:38,757 [chuckles] 396 00:16:38,801 --> 00:16:40,629 All right. But this ain't for you. 397 00:16:40,672 --> 00:16:43,153 This is for the kids. 398 00:16:43,197 --> 00:16:45,199 Well, in that case, let's move it two feet-- 399 00:16:45,242 --> 00:16:47,505 one for me and one for the kids. 400 00:16:47,549 --> 00:16:50,204 Oh, to hell with you! 401 00:16:50,247 --> 00:16:52,771 You know what, I can't believeyou're trying to pull this crap, 402 00:16:52,815 --> 00:16:55,209 after all the stuff I let you slide with over the years. 403 00:16:55,252 --> 00:16:57,080 What have you let slide? 404 00:16:57,124 --> 00:16:58,299 Are you kidding me? 405 00:16:58,342 --> 00:17:01,215 Do you know how many of your old roof tiles 406 00:17:01,258 --> 00:17:03,304 have flown over into my yard? 407 00:17:03,347 --> 00:17:06,089 And what about the floodlights you put up? 408 00:17:06,133 --> 00:17:08,439 They're just shining bright all night in my bedroom. 409 00:17:08,483 --> 00:17:11,181 Every time I get up to go to the bathroom, 410 00:17:11,225 --> 00:17:13,053 it feels like a prison break. 411 00:17:15,185 --> 00:17:17,144 Not my problem. 412 00:17:17,187 --> 00:17:19,233 A-Actually, Walter, it is. 413 00:17:19,276 --> 00:17:21,191 According to the Pasadena Zoning Manual, 414 00:17:21,235 --> 00:17:24,499 those are both residential C-1 violations. 415 00:17:24,542 --> 00:17:25,587 So? 416 00:17:25,630 --> 00:17:27,328 So, if the city inspector finds out, 417 00:17:27,371 --> 00:17:30,548 you're staring down the barrel of some pretty hefty fines. 418 00:17:30,592 --> 00:17:31,723 He is? 419 00:17:31,767 --> 00:17:34,465 You are. 420 00:17:36,206 --> 00:17:39,340 Yeah, you know, and now that I'mlooking around, there's no way 421 00:17:39,383 --> 00:17:41,733 that this half-saddle door threshold is up to code. 422 00:17:41,777 --> 00:17:44,345 And don't even get me started on the enclosed breezeway, 423 00:17:44,388 --> 00:17:48,131 which is clearly within fivefeet of a multi-person dwelling. 424 00:17:48,175 --> 00:17:50,220 [chuckles] 425 00:17:50,264 --> 00:17:52,788 Do not get him started on breezeways. 426 00:17:54,529 --> 00:17:57,140 Well, hold on, now, we don't have to get into all of that. 427 00:17:57,184 --> 00:17:58,576 You're right, we don't. 428 00:17:58,620 --> 00:18:00,839 Because you're gonna sign that petition, 429 00:18:00,883 --> 00:18:03,625 and we're gonna put up a speed bump to protect these kids. 430 00:18:03,668 --> 00:18:05,453 Are we clear? 431 00:18:05,496 --> 00:18:07,411 Crystal, baby. 432 00:18:11,415 --> 00:18:13,417 Fine. You win. 433 00:18:15,941 --> 00:18:17,552 But that catfish at your party sucked. 434 00:18:19,293 --> 00:18:21,121 Give me my pen. 435 00:18:23,384 --> 00:18:25,255 Damn, Dave,that was gangsta, man. 436 00:18:25,299 --> 00:18:28,258 Yeah, you want to hear something even more gangsta? 437 00:18:28,302 --> 00:18:30,391 I just made all that stuff up. 438 00:18:30,434 --> 00:18:30,826 I don't even know what a breezeway is. 439 00:18:38,834 --> 00:18:40,705 This is so great. 440 00:18:40,749 --> 00:18:43,317 That speed bump is really gonna slow people down around here. 441 00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:46,276 Yeah, and it's short enoughthat I could just zip around it. 442 00:18:48,409 --> 00:18:50,628 Mom, does this mean I can play outside again? 443 00:18:50,672 --> 00:18:52,761 Yes. But not near the street, 444 00:18:52,804 --> 00:18:56,199 not after dark, and never without supervision. 445 00:18:56,243 --> 00:18:57,896 I love you, too. 446 00:18:59,942 --> 00:19:01,770 Can I go inside and play on my iPad? 447 00:19:01,813 --> 00:19:03,511 Okay. 448 00:19:04,860 --> 00:19:07,167 What was I thinking? He could get carpal tunnel. 449 00:19:10,344 --> 00:19:11,997 Look at that speed bump. 450 00:19:12,041 --> 00:19:13,651 Isn't she beautiful? 451 00:19:13,695 --> 00:19:16,872 Yeah. It reminds me of you. 452 00:19:16,915 --> 00:19:18,308 Mm.Black, 453 00:19:18,352 --> 00:19:19,701 curvy... 454 00:19:19,744 --> 00:19:22,356 and makes me want to slow down and take my time. 455 00:19:22,399 --> 00:19:23,531 Oh... 456 00:19:25,272 --> 00:19:27,970 Oh, now I'm gonna feel guilty every time I run over it. 457 00:19:29,232 --> 00:19:32,322 But, seriously, you did a good thing for the community. 458 00:19:32,366 --> 00:19:34,237 You should be proud of yourself. 459 00:19:34,281 --> 00:19:36,326 Well, I'm glad you feel that way. 460 00:19:36,370 --> 00:19:38,981 Because I've decided... 461 00:19:39,982 --> 00:19:41,636 I'm not stopping here. 462 00:19:47,729 --> 00:19:49,252 What do you think? 463 00:19:49,296 --> 00:19:50,732 You're running for city council? 464 00:19:50,775 --> 00:19:52,603 Yeah.You're kidding, right? 465 00:19:52,647 --> 00:19:54,257 Nope. You know, getting this done 466 00:19:54,301 --> 00:19:55,998 really woke up my sense of civic duty. 467 00:19:56,041 --> 00:19:58,783 Plus, I've always wanted to seemy face on a button. 468 00:20:00,437 --> 00:20:02,396 So, if you win, 469 00:20:02,439 --> 00:20:05,312 won't that mean you'll be super busy doing government stuff 470 00:20:05,355 --> 00:20:09,272 and won't have the time to hang around here as much? 471 00:20:09,316 --> 00:20:10,621 I'm afraid so. 472 00:20:10,665 --> 00:20:12,667 Hmm. Well, in that case, 473 00:20:12,710 --> 00:20:13,972 you got myvote. 474 00:20:14,016 --> 00:20:16,975 Captioning sponsored by CBS 475 00:20:17,019 --> 00:20:18,716 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org