1 00:00:08,246 --> 00:00:10,726 What? 2 00:00:10,770 --> 00:00:13,040 Baby, are you watching Real Housewives? 3 00:00:14,731 --> 00:00:17,381 I was gonna change the channel, but then somebody 4 00:00:17,429 --> 00:00:20,219 threw a glass of wine and somebody flipped a table 5 00:00:20,258 --> 00:00:23,088 and two hours later, I'm Team Teresa. 6 00:00:23,131 --> 00:00:25,001 Well, I'm Team Brandi. 7 00:00:25,046 --> 00:00:27,746 She could get hit by a table and keep on drinking. 8 00:00:29,746 --> 00:00:30,876 Where's Malcolm? 9 00:00:30,921 --> 00:00:32,661 Oh, he's on a date with Sofia. 10 00:00:32,705 --> 00:00:34,665 Again? 11 00:00:34,707 --> 00:00:36,407 Wow, this is getting serious. 12 00:00:36,448 --> 00:00:38,108 I can't believe I still haven't met that girl. 13 00:00:40,452 --> 00:00:42,102 And I can't believe Teresa thinks she can 14 00:00:42,150 --> 00:00:43,720 flip over that giant... 15 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,110 Oh, no, she did it. 16 00:00:48,330 --> 00:00:49,730 Oh, hey, guys. 17 00:00:49,766 --> 00:00:51,286 Tina, did we order two white people? 18 00:00:52,334 --> 00:00:55,294 Uh, no, uh, I did. 19 00:00:55,337 --> 00:00:57,127 But don't worry, I'll take 'em to go. 20 00:00:57,165 --> 00:00:59,425 So what's going on? 21 00:00:59,471 --> 00:01:01,121 Marty invited us to trivia night 22 00:01:01,169 --> 00:01:02,959 down at Ernie's Hot Spot. 23 00:01:02,996 --> 00:01:05,866 These Pasadena peeps can't wait to play. 24 00:01:05,912 --> 00:01:09,742 Who are the Johnsons? 25 00:01:09,786 --> 00:01:11,656 Let me grab my jacket and we'll go. 26 00:01:11,701 --> 00:01:13,041 Well, how about you guys? You want to join us? 27 00:01:13,094 --> 00:01:15,794 Uh, thanks, but I'm gonna stay in. 28 00:01:15,835 --> 00:01:18,835 I already took my bra off. 29 00:01:18,882 --> 00:01:21,842 Calvin, you want to come?Are you kidding me? 30 00:01:21,885 --> 00:01:23,795 The last thing I want to do is sit around 31 00:01:23,843 --> 00:01:25,233 with a bunch of eggheads 32 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:28,160 racing to answer "what's the biggest lake in Africa?" 33 00:01:28,196 --> 00:01:29,636 ALL: Lake Victoria. 34 00:01:30,894 --> 00:01:32,934 Trivia isn't exactly my dad's thing. 35 00:01:32,983 --> 00:01:35,683 The only facts he knows are the ones that he makes up. 36 00:01:35,725 --> 00:01:38,245 And a lot of the times he's wrong about those. 37 00:01:38,293 --> 00:01:42,163 Ho, ho. So y'all think y'all smarter than me? 38 00:01:42,210 --> 00:01:45,170 Ha. Smart enough not to answer that question out loud. 39 00:01:45,213 --> 00:01:47,953 Well, you don't know what I know. 40 00:01:47,998 --> 00:01:51,088 I know stuff that I don't know that I know I know. 41 00:01:51,132 --> 00:01:52,432 Well, so you're in? 42 00:01:52,481 --> 00:01:53,741 Hell yeah I'm in. 43 00:01:53,786 --> 00:01:56,786 And, uh, for your information, Tina, 44 00:01:56,833 --> 00:01:58,613 penguins can fly. 45 00:01:58,661 --> 00:02:00,701 They just cool where they at. 46 00:02:03,622 --> 00:02:05,582 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 47 00:02:05,624 --> 00:02:06,884 ♪ Welcome to the hood. 48 00:02:13,110 --> 00:02:16,290 Come on, Dad, think. We need your answer. 49 00:02:16,331 --> 00:02:17,541 Okay, hold on, hold on, now. 50 00:02:17,593 --> 00:02:20,333 You want to get this right, don't you? 51 00:02:22,467 --> 00:02:25,167 I'm gonna order the buffalo wings. 52 00:02:28,169 --> 00:02:29,299 I'm guessing this is a slightly 53 00:02:29,344 --> 00:02:31,734 different crowd than your dart night. 54 00:02:31,781 --> 00:02:34,131 Sure is. A lot younger. 55 00:02:34,175 --> 00:02:36,215 More man buns. 56 00:02:36,264 --> 00:02:38,354 And I heard some clown order a gin and juice 57 00:02:38,396 --> 00:02:40,486 with no gin. 58 00:02:40,529 --> 00:02:43,539 Where is my juice? I ordered it ten minutes ago. 59 00:02:45,403 --> 00:02:48,973 All right! Welcome to trivia night at Ernie's Hot Spot, 60 00:02:49,015 --> 00:02:51,105 sponsored by Carla's Fluff and Fold. 61 00:02:51,148 --> 00:02:54,938 Tell her I sent you and get one free fluff. 62 00:02:54,978 --> 00:02:57,248 Okay, y'all know how it works. 63 00:02:57,285 --> 00:02:59,595 I spin the wheel and read the questions, 64 00:02:59,635 --> 00:03:02,985 you write down the answers and order at least three drinks. 65 00:03:04,553 --> 00:03:08,073 "Astronomy." "Shakespeare." "Foreign Films." 66 00:03:08,121 --> 00:03:10,421 Shouldn't those all be under one category 67 00:03:10,472 --> 00:03:11,512 called "Who Cares?" 68 00:03:12,865 --> 00:03:14,915 Dad, I like all those things. 69 00:03:14,954 --> 00:03:16,694 I know. Who cares? 70 00:03:16,739 --> 00:03:18,399 ERNIE: Okay, 71 00:03:18,436 --> 00:03:20,436 first category is... 72 00:03:23,398 --> 00:03:25,488 Ooh, "World Flags." 73 00:03:25,530 --> 00:03:26,800 Okay, here we go. 74 00:03:26,836 --> 00:03:29,496 What is the only country 75 00:03:29,534 --> 00:03:32,494 whose flag has five sides? 76 00:03:32,537 --> 00:03:34,887 I got this one. 77 00:03:34,931 --> 00:03:36,621 Stop sign. 78 00:03:39,675 --> 00:03:42,325 Uh, Dad, that's an octagon. 79 00:03:42,373 --> 00:03:44,943 I don't care what kind of government it is. 80 00:03:46,986 --> 00:03:48,556 Okay, I know this one. 81 00:03:48,597 --> 00:03:49,777 It's on the tip of my tongue. 82 00:03:49,815 --> 00:03:51,515 I know it definitely starts with an "L". 83 00:03:51,556 --> 00:03:53,906 It's Nepal.Or ends with an "L". 84 00:03:53,950 --> 00:03:57,480 Don't worry, sweetie, you were about to get it. 85 00:03:57,519 --> 00:03:59,919 You weren't. 86 00:03:59,956 --> 00:04:01,916 Okay, everybody, boards up. 87 00:04:01,958 --> 00:04:03,398 The correct answer 88 00:04:03,438 --> 00:04:05,878 is Nepal.Yes! 89 00:04:05,918 --> 00:04:07,488 And for everybody who got that right, 90 00:04:07,529 --> 00:04:11,009 hike your way to the bar and buy yourself a Fuzzy Nepal. 91 00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:14,320 Okay, good warm-up. Just got to focus. 92 00:04:14,362 --> 00:04:15,622 Which would be so much easier 93 00:04:15,667 --> 00:04:17,537 if I had my juice! 94 00:04:17,582 --> 00:04:18,972 ERNIE: Okay... 95 00:04:22,326 --> 00:04:23,376 Ooh! 96 00:04:23,414 --> 00:04:24,984 Chemistry.Yes! 97 00:04:25,024 --> 00:04:28,284 Pb is the chemical symbol 98 00:04:28,332 --> 00:04:30,552 for what common element? 99 00:04:30,595 --> 00:04:32,205 Ah, I know this one. 100 00:04:32,249 --> 00:04:34,649 Plubonium. 101 00:04:34,686 --> 00:04:36,336 Final answer. 102 00:04:36,384 --> 00:04:37,734 Seriously, Dad? That's not even a... 103 00:04:37,776 --> 00:04:39,956 I said final answer. 104 00:04:39,996 --> 00:04:42,216 Gu-Guys, this is all me. Just give me a second. 105 00:04:42,259 --> 00:04:44,659 Pb. Pb. 106 00:04:44,696 --> 00:04:47,046 PB and J. Aw, great. 107 00:04:47,090 --> 00:04:49,100 Now I'm hungry, too. 108 00:04:50,615 --> 00:04:51,965 It's lead. 109 00:04:52,008 --> 00:04:52,968 Boards up. 110 00:04:53,009 --> 00:04:56,499 The correct answer is lead. 111 00:04:56,534 --> 00:04:58,234 Yeah. Nice, Marty. 112 00:04:58,275 --> 00:04:59,845 All right. You and me got this.Yeah. 113 00:04:59,885 --> 00:05:01,795 Hey, we're here, too. 114 00:05:01,844 --> 00:05:03,844 Yeah, I know, but I still think we can win. 115 00:05:07,980 --> 00:05:09,770 Hey, Ma. 116 00:05:09,808 --> 00:05:12,858 Hey. Did you have a good time with Sofia? 117 00:05:12,898 --> 00:05:14,858 Yes, I did. It was great. 118 00:05:14,900 --> 00:05:17,560 Oh. How long have you two been seeing each other? 119 00:05:17,599 --> 00:05:19,559 Uh, I don't know. Maybe like two... 120 00:05:19,601 --> 00:05:21,681 73 days! 121 00:05:25,563 --> 00:05:27,913 When am I gonna finally meet this girl? 122 00:05:27,957 --> 00:05:29,957 Look, I don't know, Ma. Uh, soon, okay? 123 00:05:30,002 --> 00:05:31,392 Well, what's the problem? 124 00:05:31,439 --> 00:05:33,969 You act like you're afraid to introduce her to me. 125 00:05:34,006 --> 00:05:36,226 I'm sorry if I wasn't clear on that, Ma. 126 00:05:36,269 --> 00:05:37,749 I am terrified. 127 00:05:37,793 --> 00:05:39,663 Oh, uh... 128 00:05:39,708 --> 00:05:41,148 Malcolm, why? 129 00:05:41,187 --> 00:05:43,107 Because every time I bring a girl home, 130 00:05:43,146 --> 00:05:45,406 you grill her like she knows who shot Tupac. 131 00:05:45,453 --> 00:05:47,413 Oh, please. 132 00:05:47,455 --> 00:05:49,235 All moms ask questions. 133 00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:51,712 Oh, really? Do all moms open with, 134 00:05:51,763 --> 00:05:53,413 "Hey, I'm Tina. Do you want 135 00:05:53,461 --> 00:05:55,371 and are you able to have kids?" 136 00:05:57,029 --> 00:06:00,209 Well, what can I say? I'm a people person. 137 00:06:00,250 --> 00:06:02,780 I want her to make me more people. 138 00:06:07,562 --> 00:06:08,862 Hey, Dave. 139 00:06:08,911 --> 00:06:10,651 Hey, Calvin. 140 00:06:12,567 --> 00:06:15,007 Congrats on the, uh, big trivia win last night. 141 00:06:15,047 --> 00:06:17,577 Yeah. You too. 142 00:06:19,704 --> 00:06:21,054 Marty was on fire. 143 00:06:21,097 --> 00:06:23,927 So was Gemma.Yeah. 144 00:06:23,969 --> 00:06:27,459 Did you see how smug he was?She was being such a show-off! 145 00:06:27,495 --> 00:06:30,015 I mean, just because I didn't go to college, 146 00:06:30,062 --> 00:06:31,542 he thinks he's smarter than me? 147 00:06:31,586 --> 00:06:33,676 Well, technically, it's not "smarter than me," 148 00:06:33,718 --> 00:06:36,678 it's "smarter than I." 149 00:06:36,721 --> 00:06:39,891 But yours sounds way more right. 150 00:06:39,942 --> 00:06:41,722 All I know is that game wasn't fair. 151 00:06:41,770 --> 00:06:44,730 It was rigged for book-smart nerds like Marty. 152 00:06:44,773 --> 00:06:47,293 I regret the day he learned to read.Yeah. 153 00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:50,650 You know, the only reason that Gemma beat me to those answers 154 00:06:50,692 --> 00:06:52,692 is because I always overthink things. 155 00:06:53,956 --> 00:06:56,656 Or do I? 156 00:06:56,698 --> 00:06:58,048 I mean, they may have book smarts, 157 00:06:58,090 --> 00:06:59,490 but we've got street smarts. 158 00:06:59,527 --> 00:07:01,177 Yeah, you know what, of we had another chance, 159 00:07:01,224 --> 00:07:03,314 we would bust a cat in their ass. 160 00:07:06,838 --> 00:07:09,448 It's-it's a "cap," Dave, not a cat. 161 00:07:12,409 --> 00:07:15,109 That does seem a lot easier. 162 00:07:16,544 --> 00:07:18,284 But like you said, 163 00:07:18,328 --> 00:07:20,288 what if we had another chance? 164 00:07:20,330 --> 00:07:22,160 You mean go back to Ernie's next week? 165 00:07:22,201 --> 00:07:23,551 No. No, no, no. 166 00:07:23,594 --> 00:07:24,634 I got a better idea. 167 00:07:24,682 --> 00:07:26,502 We're gonna level the playing field. 168 00:07:27,598 --> 00:07:29,998 Oh, I see where you're going.You do? 169 00:07:30,035 --> 00:07:32,125 Not at all, but I trust you. 170 00:07:35,563 --> 00:07:37,953 So, do you eat sushi a lot?Not often. 171 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:41,310 But I did once swallow Marty's goldfish on a dare. 172 00:07:42,526 --> 00:07:45,006 Oh, my... 173 00:07:46,530 --> 00:07:48,230 Oh, my goodness. 174 00:07:48,271 --> 00:07:50,441 Malcolm, what are you doing here? 175 00:07:50,491 --> 00:07:54,051 You mean eating at the place I told you I would be? 176 00:07:54,103 --> 00:07:56,803 You did? 177 00:07:56,845 --> 00:07:59,455 That must be why I'm in the mood for sushi. 178 00:08:02,285 --> 00:08:04,675 Ah... So, uh, 179 00:08:04,722 --> 00:08:07,892 aren't you gonna introduce me? 180 00:08:07,943 --> 00:08:10,333 Mom, this is Sofia. Sofia... 181 00:08:10,380 --> 00:08:11,780 prepare yourself. 182 00:08:13,818 --> 00:08:15,558 It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Butler. 183 00:08:15,603 --> 00:08:17,693 So nice to meet you, too. 184 00:08:17,735 --> 00:08:19,695 Scoot over, Malcolm. 185 00:08:21,043 --> 00:08:24,563 Uh, Ma, this is awkward. 186 00:08:24,612 --> 00:08:26,172 Ew, so is eating with sticks. 187 00:08:26,222 --> 00:08:28,442 A sister's gonna need a fork up in here. 188 00:08:31,183 --> 00:08:33,353 Thanks for helping us, Marty. 189 00:08:33,403 --> 00:08:35,233 Yeah, us two dummies, 190 00:08:35,274 --> 00:08:36,624 we tried everything, 191 00:08:36,667 --> 00:08:38,927 but we couldn't get the Wi-Fi to work. 192 00:08:40,715 --> 00:08:43,585 Routers can be pretty complicated, especially when 193 00:08:43,631 --> 00:08:45,371 you haven't plugged them in. 194 00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:49,949 Oh. Hey, guys. 195 00:08:49,985 --> 00:08:51,155 What are you all doing? 196 00:08:51,203 --> 00:08:52,813 Well, one of us is plugging in your router 197 00:08:52,857 --> 00:08:54,727 and the other two are acting super sketchy. 198 00:08:57,166 --> 00:08:58,866 Dave, what's going on? 199 00:08:58,907 --> 00:09:00,647 It's rematch time! 200 00:09:01,910 --> 00:09:04,790 You two are going down. 201 00:09:06,218 --> 00:09:09,308 Welcome to Trivia Night, Home Edition. 202 00:09:11,397 --> 00:09:13,487 Sponsored by 203 00:09:13,530 --> 00:09:15,190 Calvin made me do it. 204 00:09:22,626 --> 00:09:25,326 All right, it is game time. 205 00:09:25,368 --> 00:09:27,288 Calvin and Dave versus 206 00:09:27,326 --> 00:09:28,846 Gemma and Marty. 207 00:09:28,893 --> 00:09:30,323 Tonight's drink specials are 208 00:09:30,373 --> 00:09:32,593 make it yourself. This ain't my house. 209 00:09:32,636 --> 00:09:34,466 Dad, 210 00:09:34,507 --> 00:09:36,467 why are you doing this? 211 00:09:36,509 --> 00:09:39,689 To prove that me and Dave are just as smart as you two. 212 00:09:39,730 --> 00:09:42,390 Oh, so you two actually think you can beat us? 213 00:09:42,428 --> 00:09:44,608 Yeah, the guys who were both convinced 214 00:09:44,648 --> 00:09:47,998 the tallest peak in California was Space Mountain. 215 00:09:48,043 --> 00:09:50,523 Uh, hello? 216 00:09:50,567 --> 00:09:53,707 You start on land and end in space. 217 00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:58,410 All right, then. You asked for it. 218 00:09:58,444 --> 00:09:59,964 Let's do this. 219 00:10:00,011 --> 00:10:02,051 Ha. Okay. 220 00:10:02,100 --> 00:10:04,020 Before you get too cocky, 221 00:10:04,059 --> 00:10:05,759 we added a couple of new categories 222 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,110 about some actual important knowledge. 223 00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:10,370 Yeah.Okay. Uh... 224 00:10:10,413 --> 00:10:13,413 "Making Ends Meet." 225 00:10:13,459 --> 00:10:16,159 "Tools and Their Uses." 226 00:10:16,201 --> 00:10:18,201 "Famous Daves"? 227 00:10:18,247 --> 00:10:19,727 And I'll be one 228 00:10:19,770 --> 00:10:22,210 after I lay the snackdown. 229 00:10:23,426 --> 00:10:25,426 Dave, it's "smackdown." 230 00:10:25,471 --> 00:10:26,681 No, no, no, I know. 231 00:10:26,734 --> 00:10:27,774 I was just gonna put some food out. 232 00:10:30,476 --> 00:10:32,346 So, Sofia, you're a teacher. 233 00:10:32,391 --> 00:10:33,781 That means you must like children. 234 00:10:33,828 --> 00:10:35,528 Oh, yes, I love 'em. 235 00:10:35,568 --> 00:10:37,308 They're like little gifts from God. 236 00:10:37,353 --> 00:10:40,573 Ooh, a two-for-one answer. 237 00:10:40,617 --> 00:10:43,187 Oh. You got to keep this one around, Malcolm. 238 00:10:45,187 --> 00:10:46,847 I'm trying to. 239 00:10:48,756 --> 00:10:51,196 So tell me about your family. Do they live in town? 240 00:10:51,236 --> 00:10:52,626 Yes. Boyle Heights. 241 00:10:52,673 --> 00:10:54,763 Oh. It must be nice to have them nearby. 242 00:10:54,805 --> 00:10:56,025 Do you see them a lot? 243 00:10:56,067 --> 00:10:58,247 All the time. In fact, Malcolm and I 244 00:10:58,287 --> 00:11:00,077 just had dinner with them last week. 245 00:11:02,421 --> 00:11:04,771 Is that right? 246 00:11:06,034 --> 00:11:08,294 So you all just met last week? 247 00:11:08,340 --> 00:11:10,480 Can a brother get some sake up in here? 248 00:11:12,301 --> 00:11:13,731 Oh, no, that's not when they met. 249 00:11:13,781 --> 00:11:15,561 We all went to a Lakers game last month. 250 00:11:18,568 --> 00:11:21,308 Well, isn't that nice? 251 00:11:21,353 --> 00:11:23,923 You know, everybody just meeting and greeting 252 00:11:23,965 --> 00:11:25,575 and going to games. 253 00:11:25,618 --> 00:11:28,318 Ain't nobody met my ass. 254 00:11:29,797 --> 00:11:31,367 All right, look, Ma, I can explain. 255 00:11:31,407 --> 00:11:33,757 No, no, no, no. Don't bother. 256 00:11:33,801 --> 00:11:35,321 I've heard plenty. 257 00:11:35,367 --> 00:11:38,367 Sofia, enjoy the rest of your evening, and Malcolm, 258 00:11:38,414 --> 00:11:39,714 you're dead to me. 259 00:11:42,331 --> 00:11:46,021 Okay, the category is "Making Ends Meet." 260 00:11:47,379 --> 00:11:49,339 "You just moved, 261 00:11:49,381 --> 00:11:51,901 "you're trying to get your lights on, 262 00:11:51,949 --> 00:11:54,519 "but you got bad credit. 263 00:11:56,258 --> 00:11:57,518 What do you do?" 264 00:11:58,564 --> 00:12:00,304 Put the bill in your baby's name. 265 00:12:02,046 --> 00:12:04,266 Correct!Yes! Yes. 266 00:12:04,309 --> 00:12:06,879 What kind of trivia question is that? 267 00:12:06,921 --> 00:12:08,181 A good one. 268 00:12:09,184 --> 00:12:10,704 One that someone might 269 00:12:10,751 --> 00:12:12,791 actually use in their life. 270 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:15,320 Wait a minute, is that why my credit history 271 00:12:15,364 --> 00:12:17,364 goes back to when I was five? 272 00:12:19,542 --> 00:12:21,492 ERNIE: Okay. 273 00:12:21,544 --> 00:12:24,244 So the score is Calvin and Dave: eight, 274 00:12:24,286 --> 00:12:26,286 Gemma and Marty: three. 275 00:12:26,331 --> 00:12:30,071 And still zero dollars in my tip jar. 276 00:12:30,118 --> 00:12:33,208 Okay. Dave, can I talk to you in the kitchen for a second? 277 00:12:33,251 --> 00:12:34,811 Yeah, but we're right in the middle... 278 00:12:34,862 --> 00:12:36,122 Wrong answer. 279 00:12:40,302 --> 00:12:42,252 I can't believe you. 280 00:12:42,304 --> 00:12:44,524 I know. I totally pulled "Davy Crockett" 281 00:12:44,567 --> 00:12:46,827 out of my butt back there. 282 00:12:46,874 --> 00:12:49,044 That's not what I'm talking about. 283 00:12:49,093 --> 00:12:51,053 I'm talking about how important it is 284 00:12:51,095 --> 00:12:53,145 for you to prove that you're smarter than me. 285 00:12:53,184 --> 00:12:54,924 No, it's not. And... 286 00:12:54,969 --> 00:12:58,279 technically, it's "smarter than I." 287 00:13:00,104 --> 00:13:02,414 Maybe, when you're using "than" as a conjunction 288 00:13:02,454 --> 00:13:03,894 with an implied "am." 289 00:13:03,934 --> 00:13:06,324 But I just used it as a preposition. 290 00:13:09,679 --> 00:13:12,989 Okay, I owe Calvin an apology. 291 00:13:13,030 --> 00:13:16,260 So I'm better at trivia than you. Big deal. 292 00:13:16,294 --> 00:13:18,204 Why are you being so insecure? 293 00:13:18,253 --> 00:13:20,343 I'm not insecure. I'm the most secure. 294 00:13:20,385 --> 00:13:22,735 I-I'm the securest. 295 00:13:22,779 --> 00:13:24,219 Ugh. 296 00:13:24,259 --> 00:13:26,219 And I know that's not a word. 297 00:13:26,261 --> 00:13:28,431 That's just how secure I am. 298 00:13:30,265 --> 00:13:33,225 Fine, don't admit it to me, but at least admit it to yourself: 299 00:13:33,268 --> 00:13:35,318 you're being a giant baby. 300 00:13:37,185 --> 00:13:40,185 Well, you see, that's why you're losing. 301 00:13:40,231 --> 00:13:42,581 A giant baby is just a normal-sized adult. 302 00:13:52,069 --> 00:13:53,029 Hey. 303 00:13:53,070 --> 00:13:55,990 Ah. Look who's home early. 304 00:13:56,030 --> 00:13:58,080 I thought maybe you'd be out getting a family portrait 305 00:13:58,119 --> 00:13:59,859 with Sofia's parents. 306 00:14:01,905 --> 00:14:03,905 Ma, will you stop? 307 00:14:03,951 --> 00:14:05,951 You met her parents, Malcolm. 308 00:14:05,996 --> 00:14:09,306 More than once, but you wouldn't let her meet me? 309 00:14:09,347 --> 00:14:11,527 Your father I get, but me? 310 00:14:13,438 --> 00:14:15,268 Do I really embarrass you that much? 311 00:14:15,310 --> 00:14:17,230 Ma, you asked Sofia if she'll be wearing white 312 00:14:17,268 --> 00:14:18,968 on her wedding day. 313 00:14:19,009 --> 00:14:21,969 Malcolm, I'm sorry that you feel the need 314 00:14:22,012 --> 00:14:23,972 to protect your girlfriends from me. 315 00:14:24,014 --> 00:14:26,364 I didn't realize I was such a horrible mother. 316 00:14:29,324 --> 00:14:31,894 Look, Ma, I'm not just protecting them. 317 00:14:31,935 --> 00:14:33,895 I'm also protecting you. 318 00:14:33,937 --> 00:14:35,327 From what? 319 00:14:35,373 --> 00:14:37,373 Every time I introduce you to a girl, 320 00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:39,159 you get so invested. 321 00:14:39,203 --> 00:14:41,333 You get to know them, you get close to them, 322 00:14:41,379 --> 00:14:43,339 and when it doesn't work out, it breaks your heart. 323 00:14:43,381 --> 00:14:46,341 That is not true. 324 00:14:46,384 --> 00:14:47,814 Oh, really? 325 00:14:47,864 --> 00:14:49,904 When I broke up with Jessica, you kept 326 00:14:49,953 --> 00:14:53,083 sneaking out to see her for three more weeks. 327 00:14:53,130 --> 00:14:55,220 I just needed more time, okay? 328 00:14:57,178 --> 00:14:59,708 Look, Ma, you know I love you. 329 00:14:59,745 --> 00:15:02,135 But it's hard enough for me to get over a girl. 330 00:15:02,183 --> 00:15:04,743 I don't want to have to worry about you getting over her, too. 331 00:15:04,794 --> 00:15:07,494 I guess I just keep hoping every girl you bring home 332 00:15:07,536 --> 00:15:09,186 is gonna be the one. 333 00:15:09,233 --> 00:15:11,933 Ah, don't worry about it. One of them will be. 334 00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:15,325 Hey, maybe Sofia. We'll see. 335 00:15:16,414 --> 00:15:18,934 Okay. 336 00:15:18,982 --> 00:15:21,412 Well, as long as it's not that Jessica. 337 00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:24,723 No, that bougie skank totally ghosted me. 338 00:15:26,424 --> 00:15:29,474 Okay, we are neck and neck 339 00:15:29,514 --> 00:15:34,514 after an epic collapse from Calvin and Dave. 340 00:15:34,563 --> 00:15:36,603 What the hell is with you? 341 00:15:36,652 --> 00:15:38,742 You just blew four answers in a row. 342 00:15:38,784 --> 00:15:40,524 In a question about "Famous Daves," 343 00:15:40,569 --> 00:15:43,359 you answered Stephen King. 344 00:15:43,398 --> 00:15:45,318 Well, I'm sorry, Calvin. 345 00:15:45,356 --> 00:15:47,536 I guess I'm just not that smart. 346 00:15:47,576 --> 00:15:50,976 And I'm totally okay with it. 347 00:15:51,014 --> 00:15:52,534 You're an idiot. 348 00:15:52,581 --> 00:15:54,491 Exactly. 349 00:15:54,539 --> 00:15:56,069 Okay, am I missing something? 350 00:15:56,106 --> 00:15:58,366 I am. Tips in my jar. 351 00:16:00,589 --> 00:16:02,289 Here's a quarter. 352 00:16:02,330 --> 00:16:03,550 Spin the damn wheel. 353 00:16:03,592 --> 00:16:07,892 Okay, we are all tied up, 354 00:16:07,944 --> 00:16:10,854 and apparently, since I'm doing this for a quarter, 355 00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:12,383 this will be 356 00:16:12,427 --> 00:16:14,297 our last question. 357 00:16:17,780 --> 00:16:19,180 Ooh. "Auto Parts." 358 00:16:19,216 --> 00:16:21,046 MARTY: Come on. That's not fair. 359 00:16:21,088 --> 00:16:22,438 He's a mechanic. 360 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:24,440 Ah, guys, do you want to call it now, 361 00:16:24,482 --> 00:16:27,002 or do you want to go through the humiliation? 362 00:16:28,486 --> 00:16:31,616 I'm just kidding. I want to see the humiliation. 363 00:16:32,882 --> 00:16:36,842 Okay. "In a car's engine's cylinders, 364 00:16:36,886 --> 00:16:38,846 the valves..." 365 00:16:38,888 --> 00:16:42,458 Lets the fuel in and the exhaust out. 366 00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:43,460 Final answer. 367 00:16:43,501 --> 00:16:46,191 Incorrect.What? 368 00:16:46,243 --> 00:16:49,683 I did not finish asking the question. 369 00:16:49,725 --> 00:16:52,375 "In a car engine's cylinders, 370 00:16:52,423 --> 00:16:55,903 "the valves let the fuel in and the exhaust out. 371 00:16:55,948 --> 00:16:58,908 This part moves the valves." 372 00:16:58,951 --> 00:17:00,511 MARTY: Okay, okay, okay. 373 00:17:00,562 --> 00:17:02,172 Okay. I can figure this out. 374 00:17:02,216 --> 00:17:05,696 Um, the spark plugs ignite the fuel, 375 00:17:05,741 --> 00:17:08,391 which fires the pistons, which turns 376 00:17:08,439 --> 00:17:11,319 the crankshaft, which is attached to the timing belt, 377 00:17:11,355 --> 00:17:14,275 which turns the camshaft. 378 00:17:14,315 --> 00:17:16,445 Correct!Yes! 379 00:17:18,319 --> 00:17:22,019 Marty and Gemma win, and I am out of here. 380 00:17:25,848 --> 00:17:28,808 Well, looks like you were wrong. 381 00:17:28,851 --> 00:17:30,591 Clearly, I have nothing to prove. 382 00:17:30,635 --> 00:17:34,765 Which, if you think about it, proves I was right. 383 00:17:34,813 --> 00:17:36,813 You know what it proves to me? 384 00:17:36,859 --> 00:17:38,729 That you're sleeping alone tonight. 385 00:17:41,429 --> 00:17:42,779 Wait. I take it back. 386 00:17:42,821 --> 00:17:45,211 I was wrong about being right. 387 00:17:45,259 --> 00:17:48,399 Well, Dad, I guess I win again. 388 00:17:48,436 --> 00:17:50,696 Well, that's only 'cause I hit the buzzer too fast. 389 00:17:50,742 --> 00:17:52,172 You know what I mean? 390 00:17:52,222 --> 00:17:54,262 The problem is my cat-like reflexes. 391 00:17:55,660 --> 00:17:57,060 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 392 00:17:57,097 --> 00:17:59,757 Heads up.Hey... Oh, hey... 393 00:18:01,275 --> 00:18:03,755 You saw how I blocked that, right? I blocked that. 394 00:18:03,799 --> 00:18:06,329 Come on, Dad, what's really going on here? 395 00:18:06,367 --> 00:18:10,637 Look, son, just because you know a few random facts 396 00:18:10,675 --> 00:18:14,895 and have a degree, i-it's not all the smart that you need. 397 00:18:14,940 --> 00:18:16,160 What are you talking about? 398 00:18:16,203 --> 00:18:18,463 Not everybody gets to go to college. 399 00:18:18,509 --> 00:18:19,949 I mean, I was gonna go, 400 00:18:19,989 --> 00:18:21,599 but then your grandfather got sick 401 00:18:21,643 --> 00:18:25,513 and I had to go to work at his shop. 402 00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:27,440 I-Is that what this is about? 403 00:18:27,475 --> 00:18:30,655 Dad, I-I don't think I'm smarter than you. 404 00:18:30,695 --> 00:18:31,525 You don't? 405 00:18:31,566 --> 00:18:33,086 No. 406 00:18:33,133 --> 00:18:35,223 How do you think I knew all that car stuff? 407 00:18:35,265 --> 00:18:37,095 When I was a kid, I followed you around, 408 00:18:37,137 --> 00:18:38,657 soaking up everything you said. 409 00:18:38,703 --> 00:18:39,663 And then, because of all your hard work, 410 00:18:39,704 --> 00:18:41,054 I got to go to college, 411 00:18:41,097 --> 00:18:43,147 where I learned half of it was wrong. 412 00:18:45,580 --> 00:18:47,540 Well, 413 00:18:47,582 --> 00:18:50,362 thanks to me, you got out of kindergarten 414 00:18:50,411 --> 00:18:52,321 with an 800 credit score, so... 415 00:18:54,589 --> 00:18:58,599 Seriously, Dad, I'm only where I am because of you. 416 00:18:58,636 --> 00:19:00,336 So thanks. 417 00:19:00,377 --> 00:19:02,337 You're welcome, son. 418 00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:06,386 Well, would you look at that? 419 00:19:06,427 --> 00:19:08,957 Looks like there are no losers tonight. 420 00:19:11,258 --> 00:19:13,828 Well, looks like I'm sleeping on the couch. 421 00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:17,697 I stand corrected. 422 00:19:27,143 --> 00:19:28,403 Hey. 423 00:19:33,062 --> 00:19:35,492 I thought of another trivia question. 424 00:19:35,543 --> 00:19:38,713 "Which famous Dave acted like a total idiot tonight?" 425 00:19:42,289 --> 00:19:45,469 Me. 426 00:19:45,509 --> 00:19:47,469 Or I. 427 00:19:47,511 --> 00:19:50,121 I honestly don't know. 428 00:19:50,166 --> 00:19:52,906 Can you please just tell me why it was so important 429 00:19:52,951 --> 00:19:54,561 to prove you're smarter than me? 430 00:19:54,605 --> 00:19:56,655 Gemma, don't pretend like you don't know. 431 00:19:56,694 --> 00:19:57,824 Know what? 432 00:19:57,869 --> 00:19:59,439 Well, that everyone thinks 433 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:02,270 that you're so accomplished and smart and... 434 00:20:03,658 --> 00:20:05,658 ...I'm just some hot trophy husband. 435 00:20:08,140 --> 00:20:10,100 What are you talking about? 436 00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:14,012 Sweetie, you're the most amazing man I know. 437 00:20:14,059 --> 00:20:15,329 Really? 438 00:20:15,365 --> 00:20:18,325 Yeah. You've got this great big heart, 439 00:20:18,368 --> 00:20:20,638 you make me laugh all the time, 440 00:20:20,675 --> 00:20:22,415 and how can you not think you're smart, 441 00:20:22,459 --> 00:20:24,989 Mr. Treasurer of the Kalamazoo juggling team? 442 00:20:27,334 --> 00:20:29,634 I kept the budget low and the juggling clubs high. 443 00:20:31,686 --> 00:20:33,906 You know, you may have lost trivia, 444 00:20:33,949 --> 00:20:37,039 but if you go light some candles in the bedroom, 445 00:20:37,082 --> 00:20:39,252 you might win something else instead. 446 00:20:40,695 --> 00:20:43,345 Are you talking about what I think you're talking about? 447 00:20:44,742 --> 00:20:47,742 Correct. 448 00:20:47,789 --> 00:20:49,659 All right. 449 00:20:51,140 --> 00:20:53,450 Uh, uh... 450 00:20:53,490 --> 00:20:56,060 We are talking about sex, right? 451 00:20:56,101 --> 00:20:57,621 Yes. 452 00:21:00,236 --> 00:21:02,756 It's a good thing he's hot. 453 00:21:07,374 --> 00:21:10,414 Captioning sponsored by CBS 454 00:21:10,464 --> 00:21:13,464 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org