1
00:00:00,521 --> 00:00:05,761
All right!
2
00:00:03,998 --> 00:00:08,408
Oh, yeah, there she is.
3
00:00:06,213 --> 00:00:10,323
Look at you looking just like me...
4
00:00:08,696 --> 00:00:12,896
Strong, dark and smokin' hot.
5
00:00:10,355 --> 00:00:16,215
So what do you say, girl?
6
00:00:14,412 --> 00:00:19,262
You ready to bring a little
flavor to the neighborhood?
7
00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:22,679
Well, uh, I was just going
for a jog, but sure.
8
00:00:20,002 --> 00:00:26,852
I was talking to my smoker, Dave.
9
00:00:24,832 --> 00:00:28,092
Getting ready for the Yardecue
10
00:00:26,878 --> 00:00:29,318
- this weekend.
- Oh, yeah.
11
00:00:28,121 --> 00:00:32,031
That's right. Your last Yardecue
was the day we moved in.
12
00:00:29,337 --> 00:00:34,487
Can you believe that we've
been neighbors for a year?
13
00:00:32,058 --> 00:00:38,028
I know. It feels like
so much longer, right?
14
00:00:34,690 --> 00:00:41,620
So, what can I do to help?
15
00:00:39,664 --> 00:00:47,144
Uh, you can start by
wearing longer shorts.
16
00:00:43,993 --> 00:00:51,353
The only sausage I want to see
around here is on my grill.
17
00:00:48,397 --> 00:00:54,347
Look,
18
00:00:52,911 --> 00:00:57,051
besides, Dave, I'm the
big dog around here.
19
00:00:54,372 --> 00:00:59,552
It's my neighborhood, my Yardecue.
20
00:00:57,085 --> 00:01:02,755
Yeah, well, now that
I've been here a year,
21
00:00:59,935 --> 00:01:04,565
isn't it our neighborhood?
22
00:01:02,778 --> 00:01:06,078
Couldn't it be our Yardecue?
23
00:01:04,587 --> 00:01:08,467
Or dare I say, Our-decue?
24
00:01:06,101 --> 00:01:10,371
[LAUGHS]
25
00:01:08,490 --> 00:01:12,820
That's... that's funny, man.
26
00:01:10,405 --> 00:01:14,355
No.
27
00:01:12,836 --> 00:01:16,456
Well, hold on. Calvin, come on.
28
00:01:15,059 --> 00:01:19,249
- I really want to be a part of it.
- [SCOFFS]
29
00:01:16,476 --> 00:01:20,886
All right, fine. What
do you want to do?
30
00:01:19,272 --> 00:01:22,672
Well, you know, I don't mean to brag,
31
00:01:20,953 --> 00:01:24,123
but back home in Kalamazoo,
32
00:01:22,696 --> 00:01:27,066
I was kind of known for my barbecue.
[LAUGHS]
33
00:01:24,154 --> 00:01:29,674
We called it "Kalama-Q."
34
00:01:27,499 --> 00:01:32,749
Yeah, you're on napkins.
35
00:01:30,871 --> 00:01:36,661
Come on. An-Any chump could
bring a bag of napkins.
36
00:01:33,868 --> 00:01:38,088
You said it, I didn't.
37
00:01:36,690 --> 00:01:41,710
Well, at least put me in
charge of desserts or drinks,
38
00:01:38,337 --> 00:01:43,637
or what about music?
39
00:01:41,733 --> 00:01:46,413
Okay. Okay, fine.
40
00:01:44,093 --> 00:01:47,913
May-Maybe not music,
41
00:01:46,437 --> 00:01:50,377
but putting me on napkin
duty feels like...
42
00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:52,892
I don't know... a waste of my talents.
43
00:01:50,422 --> 00:01:55,092
Okay, well, uh,
44
00:01:53,179 --> 00:01:56,409
you want to do plates, too?
45
00:01:55,117 --> 00:01:57,897
All right, plates.
46
00:01:56,429 --> 00:01:59,289
Got my foot in the door.
47
00:01:58,046 --> 00:02:00,386
[LAUGHS]
48
00:01:59,313 --> 00:02:03,113
Great. Now go put your
foot in some pants!
49
00:02:00,415 --> 00:02:07,145
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
50
00:02:04,816 --> 00:02:09,206
♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪
51
00:02:07,172 --> 00:02:12,412
- Hey, Ma.
- Hi, Mama.
52
00:02:10,891 --> 00:02:14,571
- Hey, boys. How was work?
- Oh, it was great!
53
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:16,090
One of our satellites
discovered water...
54
00:02:14,602 --> 00:02:17,832
Not you, Marty. I meant Malcolm.
55
00:02:16,107 --> 00:02:21,957
Oh, it was kind of cool, Ma.
56
00:02:20,246 --> 00:02:23,456
I like being a security guard.
57
00:02:21,978 --> 00:02:24,718
Today, I got to handcuff somebody
58
00:02:23,483 --> 00:02:26,623
who tried to sneak in
without their ID badge.
59
00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:27,655
Ooh.
60
00:02:26,652 --> 00:02:29,862
Hey, man, I told you,
I left it in the car!
61
00:02:27,684 --> 00:02:34,564
Well, how was I supposed to
know you was telling the truth?
62
00:02:31,755 --> 00:02:36,595
You saw it in the cup holder
63
00:02:35,331 --> 00:02:38,101
when I drove you to work.
64
00:02:36,625 --> 00:02:39,655
[LAUGHS]
65
00:02:38,130 --> 00:02:42,600
You know what? Thank you for
getting me the job, little bro,
66
00:02:40,209 --> 00:02:45,889
and, uh, don't forget your
badge tomorrow. [LAUGHS]
67
00:02:42,617 --> 00:02:47,927
Yeah, Marty. Be more professional.
68
00:02:45,910 --> 00:02:49,380
What?!
69
00:02:47,946 --> 00:02:51,386
All right.
70
00:02:50,024 --> 00:02:54,344
Well, my smoker's clean,
my knives are sharp,
71
00:02:51,415 --> 00:02:55,815
and my playlist is ready.
72
00:02:54,373 --> 00:02:57,513
I'm gonna start out with a
little Earth, Wind & Fire.
73
00:02:55,844 --> 00:02:58,334
Okay.
74
00:02:57,539 --> 00:03:00,039
And I'm gonna end it
with some Jimmy Buffett.
75
00:02:58,365 --> 00:03:01,615
- Jimmy Buffett?
- Jimmy Buffett?
76
00:03:00,062 --> 00:03:04,552
It cracks me up to see Dave dance.
77
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:07,342
- Okay.
- Okay.[LAUGHTER]
78
00:03:04,578 --> 00:03:09,448
Okay. Okay.
79
00:03:07,515 --> 00:03:10,545
Okay.
80
00:03:09,475 --> 00:03:12,125
- All right.
- Aw. Baby,
81
00:03:10,572 --> 00:03:15,472
I'm so proud of you for letting
him be a part of the Yardecue.
82
00:03:12,149 --> 00:03:17,699
Whoa. Wait a minute. You're
letting Dave help out?
83
00:03:15,503 --> 00:03:18,923
Oh, it's nothing.
84
00:03:17,718 --> 00:03:20,758
I'm just letting him bring
napkins and plates.
85
00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:24,559
Uh, wait, wait, Wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
86
00:03:22,328 --> 00:03:26,778
You gave Dave napkins and plates?
87
00:03:24,580 --> 00:03:29,680
I've been stuck on folding
chairs for ten years!
88
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:31,984
And when you get that right,
89
00:03:30,097 --> 00:03:34,317
I'll give you napkins and plates.
90
00:03:32,010 --> 00:03:36,310
Uh, wait a minute.
91
00:03:34,929 --> 00:03:38,789
Admit it, Pop. You like Dave.
92
00:03:36,334 --> 00:03:40,994
- [SCOFFS]
- Yeah.
93
00:03:39,006 --> 00:03:43,096
- What?! What?!
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.
94
00:03:41,024 --> 00:03:44,314
- ALL: Yeah.
- [SCOFFS]
95
00:03:43,118 --> 00:03:46,558
Don't nobody like no damn Dave.
96
00:03:44,344 --> 00:03:47,904
[LAUGHTER]
97
00:03:46,584 --> 00:03:49,504
Baby, you two look pretty happy
98
00:03:47,931 --> 00:03:51,631
in your photo at the top
of Splash Mountain.
99
00:03:49,527 --> 00:03:52,967
MALCOLM AND MARTY: Mm-hmm.
100
00:03:51,656 --> 00:03:54,536
He just got sprayed in the face
101
00:03:52,987 --> 00:03:56,127
by the mechanical rabbit.
102
00:03:54,559 --> 00:03:58,069
It's why I bought the photo.
103
00:03:56,150 --> 00:04:01,460
Okay, uh, what about
that farmer's market
104
00:03:59,061 --> 00:04:03,631
- y'all went to last Sunday?
- Ah. Oh.
105
00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:06,430
It's a farmer's market. You
got to take a white dude.
106
00:04:03,663 --> 00:04:10,693
Baby, there's no shame in
admitting that you like him.
107
00:04:08,111 --> 00:04:12,531
- Yeah, he's a good guy, Dad.
- TINA: Yeah.
108
00:04:10,719 --> 00:04:13,969
And he's a good neighbor.
109
00:04:12,557 --> 00:04:17,417
Fine. I mean, maybe he a'ight.
110
00:04:14,306 --> 00:04:19,266
He's all right.
111
00:04:17,436 --> 00:04:20,906
ALL: Oh...
112
00:04:19,289 --> 00:04:22,969
you love him!
113
00:04:20,935 --> 00:04:24,105
You love him!
114
00:04:22,992 --> 00:04:25,672
- [LAUGHS]
- Want to be together.
115
00:04:24,128 --> 00:04:26,878
MARTY: Oh, that feeling.
116
00:04:25,696 --> 00:04:28,736
[LAUGHS]
117
00:04:26,901 --> 00:04:34,171
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
118
00:04:31,970 --> 00:04:37,670
- Hey, Tina.
- What's up, Gemma?
119
00:04:35,768 --> 00:04:39,088
Can I borrow some milk?
120
00:04:37,691 --> 00:04:40,381
Sure. What kind do you want?
121
00:04:39,109 --> 00:04:43,199
We have almond, oat,
coconut, macadamia.
122
00:04:40,407 --> 00:04:44,967
Oh, so you don't have milk?
123
00:04:43,526 --> 00:04:46,236
I'll just go to the store.
124
00:04:44,988 --> 00:04:49,138
Hang on, hang on! Before you go,
125
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:50,983
I got you a present.
126
00:04:49,243 --> 00:04:53,883
It's for our one-year
anniversary as friends.
127
00:04:51,347 --> 00:04:55,407
Oh, that's so sweet.
128
00:04:53,909 --> 00:04:57,789
I didn't get you anything. I feel bad.
129
00:04:55,429 --> 00:04:59,259
Oh, you don't have to feel bad.
130
00:04:57,812 --> 00:05:01,432
- I...
- Let me see what you got!
131
00:04:59,276 --> 00:05:04,136
[LAUGHS]
132
00:05:02,129 --> 00:05:07,589
It's a... It's a, uh...
133
00:05:04,579 --> 00:05:08,949
Peasant blouse!
134
00:05:07,614 --> 00:05:10,894
Exactly!
135
00:05:08,969 --> 00:05:14,039
It's just like the one I have
that you complimented me on.
136
00:05:11,494 --> 00:05:17,494
Oh, what a good memory you have.
137
00:05:14,062 --> 00:05:20,862
Do you love it?
138
00:05:19,269 --> 00:05:23,529
Well, to be honest...
139
00:05:20,892 --> 00:05:25,232
not really.
140
00:05:23,670 --> 00:05:26,790
No, no, no, but listen.
141
00:05:25,262 --> 00:05:29,462
I really appreciate the
thought, honestly.
142
00:05:26,806 --> 00:05:32,126
Oh. I'm sorry.
143
00:05:30,341 --> 00:05:34,721
I just... I figured you would like it.
144
00:05:32,154 --> 00:05:37,194
And maybe we'd be twinsies.
145
00:05:35,258 --> 00:05:39,698
Gemma, you don't have to be sorry.
146
00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:41,500
I mean, we're not gonna
always like the gifts
147
00:05:39,717 --> 00:05:42,577
that we give each other.
148
00:05:41,519 --> 00:05:45,159
Like those hoop earrings that
I gave you that you hate.
149
00:05:42,604 --> 00:05:46,924
[LAUGHS]
150
00:05:45,182 --> 00:05:49,082
I don't hate those earrings.
151
00:05:47,632 --> 00:05:51,692
I love them.
152
00:05:49,108 --> 00:05:55,028
Please.
153
00:05:53,614 --> 00:05:58,084
Well... I do.
154
00:05:55,810 --> 00:05:59,720
So why don't you ever wear them?
155
00:05:58,109 --> 00:06:02,619
I was just waiting for
a special occasion.
156
00:05:59,999 --> 00:06:04,079
- Okay.
- Like
157
00:06:02,637 --> 00:06:07,107
Grover's third grade
graduation, or his wedding.
158
00:06:04,103 --> 00:06:10,453
All right, I'll see you later.
159
00:06:08,544 --> 00:06:12,924
Wait. Since you don't like the
blouse, I'll just take it back.
160
00:06:10,479 --> 00:06:15,439
No, no, no. I'm gonna save
it for a special occasion,
161
00:06:12,954 --> 00:06:17,394
like Grover's wedding.
162
00:06:15,458 --> 00:06:23,158
[OLD-FASHIONED ROCK INSTRUMENTAL PLAYS]
163
00:06:20,229 --> 00:06:25,419
[WHISTLES]
164
00:06:23,183 --> 00:06:28,843
[DOOR CLOSES]
165
00:06:27,627 --> 00:06:30,537
DAVE: Hey, Calvin, you in the kitchen?
166
00:06:28,980 --> 00:06:34,000
Oh, we just letting ourselves
into each other's houses now?
167
00:06:30,560 --> 00:06:37,130
Picked up the napkins and the plates.
168
00:06:35,150 --> 00:06:38,610
Went with the clear ones
169
00:06:37,298 --> 00:06:40,568
so you can see the
food from both sides.
170
00:06:38,629 --> 00:06:43,139
[LAUGHS]
171
00:06:40,659 --> 00:06:45,199
Ooh, looks like you're
making your sauce.
172
00:06:43,253 --> 00:06:46,853
Yeah, that's right.
173
00:06:45,287 --> 00:06:49,317
Everyone back at home loved my sauce.
174
00:06:46,897 --> 00:06:51,397
I have a secret ingredient.
175
00:06:49,592 --> 00:06:53,562
Oh, good. Why don't
you keep it a secret?
176
00:06:51,539 --> 00:06:55,289
[LAUGHS]
177
00:06:53,587 --> 00:06:57,507
All right, you dragged it out of me.
178
00:06:55,371 --> 00:07:01,091
It's Worcestershire sauce.
179
00:06:59,332 --> 00:07:02,672
Look, Sorry, Dave,
180
00:07:01,274 --> 00:07:04,754
but I'm not using anything in my sauce
181
00:07:02,705 --> 00:07:06,865
that has the word "worst" in it.
182
00:07:04,776 --> 00:07:08,696
Are you sure?
183
00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:11,616
Because this stuff gives
the meat a certain tang.
184
00:07:08,721 --> 00:07:12,661
Hey, hey.
185
00:07:11,643 --> 00:07:14,253
You keep your tang away from my meat.
186
00:07:12,693 --> 00:07:17,303
Okay, Calvin, you know,
you're not the only one
187
00:07:14,769 --> 00:07:19,469
around here who knows how to make ribs.
188
00:07:17,326 --> 00:07:20,686
Come on, Dave.
189
00:07:19,486 --> 00:07:23,366
I mean, how would you feel
if I showed up in Kalamazoo
190
00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:27,658
and started hosting one of
your, uh, pumpkin festivals?
191
00:07:23,390 --> 00:07:31,000
Calvin, one call, and I
can make that happen.
192
00:07:27,682 --> 00:07:35,012
That's a big no-go to both, okay?
193
00:07:31,899 --> 00:07:37,399
All right, but, uh,
194
00:07:35,044 --> 00:07:40,614
you don't know what
you're, uh, "Michigan."
195
00:07:37,422 --> 00:07:45,992
Come on. You laughed at that
at the farmer's market!
196
00:07:43,082 --> 00:07:51,072
[UPBEAT ROCK PLAYS, INDISTINCT,
OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
197
00:07:47,841 --> 00:07:53,921
Calvin, why do you tell
everyone to show up at noon
198
00:07:51,216 --> 00:07:55,866
if the ribs aren't ready till 3:00?
199
00:07:53,947 --> 00:07:58,137
Because I know this neighborhood,
200
00:07:55,959 --> 00:08:01,429
and if I told y'all 3:00, you
wouldn't show up till 5:00.
201
00:07:58,165 --> 00:08:05,035
Why? 'Cause we black?
202
00:08:02,797 --> 00:08:06,507
Yeah.
203
00:08:05,292 --> 00:08:09,062
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
204
00:08:06,535 --> 00:08:14,005
Hey, Grover.
205
00:08:12,609 --> 00:08:15,789
I like your haircut.
206
00:08:14,031 --> 00:08:17,591
What are you talking about?
207
00:08:15,811 --> 00:08:19,191
I didn't get a haircut.
208
00:08:17,624 --> 00:08:21,924
Well, it looks nice.
209
00:08:20,132 --> 00:08:25,032
I'm gonna be over here.
210
00:08:22,213 --> 00:08:27,693
Hey, Grover, Grover.
211
00:08:26,350 --> 00:08:29,320
Come on over here, man.
212
00:08:27,722 --> 00:08:31,812
We saw you over there
talking to Kayla Watkins.
213
00:08:29,470 --> 00:08:34,420
- Mm-hmm.
- No. Blech!
214
00:08:31,838 --> 00:08:36,978
I think she likes you.
215
00:08:35,466 --> 00:08:38,346
Really?
216
00:08:37,002 --> 00:08:40,722
[LAUGHS] Yeah, man.
217
00:08:38,370 --> 00:08:42,210
Are you sure?
218
00:08:40,755 --> 00:08:45,295
'Cause she punched me
in the arm yesterday.
219
00:08:42,227 --> 00:08:47,677
BOTH: Oh.
220
00:08:45,713 --> 00:08:49,763
You got a girlfriend.
221
00:08:47,934 --> 00:09:02,024
Oh. Hey, Tina.
222
00:09:00,046 --> 00:09:05,656
Oh. I see you're wearing the earrings.
223
00:09:03,162 --> 00:09:08,022
I didn't know Grover was
getting married today.
224
00:09:05,683 --> 00:09:10,833
Well, I realized
225
00:09:09,472 --> 00:09:13,242
a lot of the neighbors
here don't know my name.
226
00:09:10,863 --> 00:09:16,133
They will now.
227
00:09:14,185 --> 00:09:18,035
Oh, come on, Gemma.
228
00:09:16,614 --> 00:09:20,744
I told you you don't have
to pretend to like them.
229
00:09:18,061 --> 00:09:22,871
I got them for you before
I knew your style.
230
00:09:20,772 --> 00:09:25,502
How can you say that?
They are totally me.
231
00:09:22,903 --> 00:09:27,483
- Ow.
- Oh.
232
00:09:26,231 --> 00:09:29,121
Ow, ow, ow! It's caught on my sleeve.
233
00:09:27,512 --> 00:09:31,482
- Oh. Uh, okay, okay.
- Ow. Ah, ow.
234
00:09:29,146 --> 00:09:33,296
- Ow. Ow!
- Okay, well, don't...
235
00:09:31,512 --> 00:09:36,792
Calvin, how much longer we got
to wait for those ribs, man?
236
00:09:33,697 --> 00:09:38,217
Ten minutes.
237
00:09:36,817 --> 00:09:40,237
You said that ten minutes ago!
238
00:09:38,282 --> 00:09:43,652
And what you gonna do about it?
239
00:09:41,599 --> 00:09:46,049
I'm gonna go get some chips.
240
00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:50,345
See, all y'all need to
learn some patience.
241
00:09:47,316 --> 00:09:53,116
You get ribs when I give you ribs.
242
00:09:50,371 --> 00:09:55,491
It ain't like you got another choice.
243
00:09:53,141 --> 00:09:58,761
Come on, everybody. Who's
ready for some ribs?!
244
00:09:56,104 --> 00:10:03,374
Take Jimmy Buffett off the playlist!
245
00:10:01,299 --> 00:10:09,879
Get back. Get-get-get, y'all get
away from them ribs. Get back.
246
00:10:06,861 --> 00:10:12,821
You! You. You.
247
00:10:09,903 --> 00:10:14,693
Calvin, what are you doing?
248
00:10:12,924 --> 00:10:17,214
What am I doing? What are you doing?
249
00:10:14,719 --> 00:10:18,539
Oh, I-I know, I know.
250
00:10:17,239 --> 00:10:20,149
But I just... I couldn't help myself.
251
00:10:18,557 --> 00:10:22,037
Besides, what's wrong
with a little variety?
252
00:10:20,174 --> 00:10:23,924
Variety sound good to me.
253
00:10:22,059 --> 00:10:26,129
Stop testing me, Trey.
254
00:10:24,355 --> 00:10:28,405
Calvin, come on.
255
00:10:26,785 --> 00:10:29,695
People want to try them.
256
00:10:28,431 --> 00:10:32,041
Let them have a little
taste of my tang.
257
00:10:29,769 --> 00:10:35,859
I told you not to do this.
258
00:10:33,952 --> 00:10:37,622
Come on, man, you
crossed the line here.
259
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:39,905
Why are you making such
a big deal out of this?
260
00:10:37,879 --> 00:10:41,779
Calvin, I'm a part of
this neighborhood, too.
261
00:10:39,998 --> 00:10:42,748
[CHUCKLES]
262
00:10:41,797 --> 00:10:43,877
Just because you live here
263
00:10:42,773 --> 00:10:46,023
doesn't mean you're a
part of the neighborhood.
264
00:10:43,898 --> 00:10:48,238
- Well, I disagree.
- Oh, really?
265
00:10:46,233 --> 00:10:51,263
- Uh, what's Trey's real name?
- Leslie.
266
00:10:48,301 --> 00:10:58,971
And what did Old Miss Kim's
third husband die of?
267
00:10:55,080 --> 00:11:00,640
Diabetes, but...
268
00:10:59,002 --> 00:11:02,922
some say Old Miss Kim.
269
00:11:00,949 --> 00:11:07,019
Which neighbor danced with MC Hammer?
270
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:08,501
Again, Old Miss Kim.
271
00:11:07,036 --> 00:11:10,786
Oh, so we just telling
272
00:11:09,306 --> 00:11:12,886
everybody business now?
273
00:11:10,806 --> 00:11:15,326
You know,
274
00:11:14,113 --> 00:11:17,913
maybe I'm more a part
of this neighborhood
275
00:11:15,355 --> 00:11:19,125
than you thought, Calvin.
276
00:11:17,936 --> 00:11:20,786
You know what, I don't care.
277
00:11:19,151 --> 00:11:22,571
I want you and your ribs
278
00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:24,304
to get out of my yard.
279
00:11:22,603 --> 00:11:25,823
Go.
280
00:11:24,635 --> 00:11:27,875
Okay, fine. Fine.
281
00:11:25,846 --> 00:11:30,866
But if anybody wants some,
they'll be right over here.
282
00:11:27,899 --> 00:11:32,429
In my yard.
283
00:11:30,892 --> 00:11:33,842
[CHUCKLES]: You know what?
284
00:11:32,453 --> 00:11:35,713
You can stay out there all day.
285
00:11:33,868 --> 00:11:37,968
Nobody's gonna eat your barbecue
286
00:11:35,736 --> 00:11:39,896
because they'll be too busy
287
00:11:37,989 --> 00:11:40,959
eating mine!
288
00:11:39,917 --> 00:11:42,577
- All right! All right, yeah!
- Hey, yeah!
289
00:11:40,985 --> 00:11:44,235
In, like, ten minutes, guys.
290
00:11:42,601 --> 00:11:46,181
[ALL GROAN]
291
00:11:44,256 --> 00:11:50,486
Come on, Grover. Don't be shy.
292
00:11:48,448 --> 00:11:52,698
Just go over there and talk to her.
293
00:11:50,511 --> 00:11:54,131
Okay.
294
00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:57,500
But do I tell her she's
stupid or she's gross?
295
00:11:54,161 --> 00:12:00,611
Uh, fair question.
296
00:11:59,011 --> 00:12:03,341
I was thinking "I like your smile,"
297
00:12:00,636 --> 00:12:05,606
- but you do you, man.
- Yeah.
298
00:12:03,367 --> 00:12:06,937
Hey, listen, man,
299
00:12:05,722 --> 00:12:08,892
opening lines are always
the hardest part.
300
00:12:06,965 --> 00:12:10,085
Yeah, you just got to be cool.
301
00:12:08,921 --> 00:12:12,121
A-And tell her something
about yourself.
302
00:12:10,108 --> 00:12:14,828
Well, I'm starting third grade,
303
00:12:12,151 --> 00:12:16,581
and I like lizards.
304
00:12:14,850 --> 00:12:18,230
- Oh!
- Sounds to me
305
00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:20,031
like you got this in the bag.
306
00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:23,000
- I got you, little brother.
- No? Okay, all right.
307
00:12:20,508 --> 00:12:27,118
What are you doing?
308
00:12:25,344 --> 00:12:29,554
Icing my ear.
309
00:12:27,894 --> 00:12:31,544
I hugged Old Miss Kim,
and it got caught
310
00:12:29,581 --> 00:12:34,281
on what everyone now knows is a wig.
311
00:12:31,566 --> 00:12:37,446
Gemma, just take them off.
312
00:12:35,544 --> 00:12:40,664
No. I was taught that when
someone gives you a present,
313
00:12:37,695 --> 00:12:43,305
the right thing to do is
to show you appreciate it.
314
00:12:40,693 --> 00:12:46,103
Well, I was taught that
honesty is the best policy.
315
00:12:43,329 --> 00:12:48,429
Well, then, I guess I was
just raised differently.
316
00:12:46,126 --> 00:12:51,096
ALL: Ooh!
317
00:12:48,795 --> 00:12:55,125
She just call your mama a ho.
318
00:12:53,506 --> 00:12:58,146
What?! No, I didn't!
319
00:12:55,153 --> 00:12:59,463
That's what I heard.
320
00:12:58,174 --> 00:13:01,964
No! No, no, no, no. Wait!
321
00:12:59,659 --> 00:13:05,749
Wait, I-I just meant that we
were raised in separate worlds.
322
00:13:01,993 --> 00:13:07,933
You know, separate but equal.
323
00:13:05,767 --> 00:13:10,767
[ALL GROAN]
324
00:13:08,198 --> 00:13:12,658
Okay, let's get you inside
325
00:13:11,072 --> 00:13:15,122
before you have to ice more
than your ear. Come on.
326
00:13:12,677 --> 00:13:17,437
- This way. This way.
- Okay.
327
00:13:15,153 --> 00:13:18,753
- Don't you...
- Smell that?
328
00:13:17,456 --> 00:13:21,176
Delicious Michigan
barbecue right over here.
329
00:13:18,776 --> 00:13:23,956
Hey! Hey, you keep the smell
of your ribs off my property.
330
00:13:21,204 --> 00:13:26,444
Come on, everyone. Try something new.
331
00:13:24,054 --> 00:13:30,044
Or stick with tradition
and don't be a sellout.
332
00:13:26,469 --> 00:13:32,409
What the hell are you doing, Uncle Tom?
333
00:13:30,685 --> 00:13:33,645
Whoa!
334
00:13:32,429 --> 00:13:35,369
Calvin, don't you think
that's a little harsh?
335
00:13:33,669 --> 00:13:37,059
No.
336
00:13:35,622 --> 00:13:38,902
That's my Uncle Tom.
337
00:13:37,078 --> 00:13:42,408
And you would know that
338
00:13:40,709 --> 00:13:44,779
if you were really a part
of this neighborhood.
339
00:13:42,431 --> 00:13:47,161
- Man, forget this. I'm hungry.
- Trey,
340
00:13:44,845 --> 00:13:48,365
if you cross that line,
341
00:13:47,192 --> 00:13:50,572
I'm-a tell child support you got a job.
342
00:13:48,392 --> 00:13:55,412
Now, Dave, you can stand
out here all day.
343
00:13:52,455 --> 00:13:58,655
But as long as I'm here,
nobody's crossing that line.
344
00:13:55,438 --> 00:14:00,488
Okay, fine, Calvin.
345
00:13:58,814 --> 00:14:04,484
It's your neighborhood, your Yardecue.
346
00:14:01,424 --> 00:14:10,574
But I'm taking these napkins with me!
347
00:14:08,315 --> 00:14:12,735
Somebody find Marty.
348
00:14:11,483 --> 00:14:14,423
He just got a promotion.
349
00:14:12,763 --> 00:14:18,963
Uh, hey, Kayla.
350
00:14:16,874 --> 00:14:20,314
Hey, Grover.
351
00:14:19,007 --> 00:14:23,227
So, uh... you like lizards?
352
00:14:20,356 --> 00:14:25,246
No.
353
00:14:23,975 --> 00:14:27,655
[SCOFFS] Me, neither.
354
00:14:25,271 --> 00:14:30,861
Um...
355
00:14:29,346 --> 00:14:33,596
are you excited about
starting third grade?
356
00:14:30,894 --> 00:14:34,674
Totally.
357
00:14:33,624 --> 00:14:36,344
Yeah, me, too.
358
00:14:34,700 --> 00:14:43,190
I asked you about lizards, right?
359
00:14:41,094 --> 00:14:46,264
Check out little man.
360
00:14:44,795 --> 00:14:47,635
Got her over there smiling.
361
00:14:46,291 --> 00:14:48,671
Yeah, man.
362
00:14:47,663 --> 00:14:50,653
Clearly our swag is contagious.
363
00:14:48,697 --> 00:14:53,297
[LAUGHS] We do make a pretty good team.
364
00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:54,881
Hey, Malcolm. Hey, Marty.
365
00:14:53,322 --> 00:14:56,342
Looking good.
366
00:14:54,913 --> 00:14:58,693
- Yeah, thank you.
- Oh, thank you.
367
00:14:57,292 --> 00:15:00,162
Appreciate that, young lady.
368
00:14:58,717 --> 00:15:01,577
- I was...
- [CHUCKLES, CLEARS THROAT]
369
00:15:00,186 --> 00:15:02,736
Oh, wait, why were you
saying thank you?
370
00:15:01,598 --> 00:15:03,808
She was talking to me.
371
00:15:02,757 --> 00:15:06,387
Uh, no, she wasn't. She was
clearly talking to me.
372
00:15:03,827 --> 00:15:09,207
Well, if she was talking to
you, why was she looking at me?
373
00:15:06,407 --> 00:15:11,027
Uh, because I am so good-looking,
374
00:15:09,230 --> 00:15:13,030
she couldn't believe we're related.
375
00:15:11,055 --> 00:15:16,575
Damn, Calvin.
376
00:15:14,915 --> 00:15:18,415
Your ribs are worth the wait.
377
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:20,880
That's what I been
trying to tell y'all.
378
00:15:18,444 --> 00:15:23,494
Who does that guy think he is?
379
00:15:21,639 --> 00:15:26,029
Bringing his weak-ass
ribs to your Yardecue.
380
00:15:23,518 --> 00:15:27,438
[LAUGHS] I know, right?
381
00:15:26,049 --> 00:15:29,079
And who buys clear plates?
382
00:15:27,457 --> 00:15:31,927
You're showing the ants
exactly what you got.
383
00:15:29,101 --> 00:15:35,211
I'm glad you put him in his place.
384
00:15:33,091 --> 00:15:37,401
Now he knows not to
show up here next year.
385
00:15:35,237 --> 00:15:39,487
Well, I didn't say all that.
386
00:15:37,435 --> 00:15:41,525
That's what I heard.
387
00:15:39,683 --> 00:15:46,123
Well, if you ask me,
that dude's a clown.
388
00:15:43,690 --> 00:15:48,860
Whoa. Whoa, Dave is not a clown.
389
00:15:46,152 --> 00:15:50,502
He may overstep,
390
00:15:48,876 --> 00:15:53,616
but actually, he's kind of my friend.
391
00:15:50,534 --> 00:15:55,834
If that's how you treat your friends,
392
00:15:53,714 --> 00:15:57,654
I hate to see how you treat your enemy.
393
00:15:55,856 --> 00:16:00,066
Well, let me show you. Give me that.
394
00:15:57,884 --> 00:16:02,864
Go on, now. Go.
395
00:16:00,762 --> 00:16:08,002
Mmm.
396
00:16:06,498 --> 00:16:09,458
Yeah.
397
00:16:08,031 --> 00:16:11,741
That's all right right there, boy.
398
00:16:09,752 --> 00:16:15,452
TINA: Okay.
399
00:16:13,672 --> 00:16:17,942
I've got some rubbing alcohol for you
400
00:16:15,481 --> 00:16:20,141
and some drinking alcohol for me.
401
00:16:17,973 --> 00:16:21,873
[CHUCKLES]
402
00:16:20,174 --> 00:16:23,814
Tina, I'm so sorry for what I said.
403
00:16:21,897 --> 00:16:24,867
Oh.
404
00:16:23,842 --> 00:16:27,142
Could you please explain
to me what I said?
405
00:16:24,889 --> 00:16:31,069
Look, when a white person
says to a black person
406
00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:32,820
they were raised "different,"
407
00:16:31,093 --> 00:16:35,413
it's like saying they
were raised better.
408
00:16:32,928 --> 00:16:37,228
Oh, my God.
409
00:16:35,746 --> 00:16:39,176
I wasn't raised better than you.
410
00:16:37,269 --> 00:16:40,709
I'm from Hickory Corners.
411
00:16:39,205 --> 00:16:42,205
My mom chews tobacco.
412
00:16:40,726 --> 00:16:43,696
[LAUGHS]
413
00:16:42,226 --> 00:16:46,556
- It's okay. You didn't offend me
- .Ow.
414
00:16:44,472 --> 00:16:47,982
I know your heart.
415
00:16:46,578 --> 00:16:49,798
But if anybody asks, I beat your ass.
416
00:16:48,008 --> 00:16:52,348
[CHUCKLES] Deal.
417
00:16:49,820 --> 00:16:53,510
All right.
418
00:16:52,371 --> 00:16:55,961
And I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to offend you
419
00:16:53,528 --> 00:16:57,818
by telling you I didn't like your gift.
420
00:16:55,992 --> 00:16:59,282
That's okay.
421
00:16:57,923 --> 00:17:00,833
I know your heart, too.
422
00:16:59,313 --> 00:17:02,163
Thank you.
423
00:17:00,862 --> 00:17:04,872
But why did you tell me
it looked cute on me?
424
00:17:02,501 --> 00:17:06,791
Okay.
425
00:17:05,456 --> 00:17:09,786
Here we go. See, on you,
426
00:17:06,822 --> 00:17:12,052
Little House on the Prairie.
427
00:17:09,967 --> 00:17:14,847
On me, 12 Years a Slave.
428
00:17:12,077 --> 00:17:17,647
- Get it?
- Oh.
429
00:17:16,123 --> 00:17:19,573
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
430
00:17:17,673 --> 00:17:27,373
I don't care what he thinks.
431
00:17:25,614 --> 00:17:29,114
I like the tang.
432
00:17:27,461 --> 00:17:33,031
Hey, Dave.
433
00:17:31,382 --> 00:17:36,682
Oh, I guess we're just walking
into each other's houses now.
434
00:17:33,462 --> 00:17:39,102
[CHUCKLES] Come on, man.
435
00:17:36,708 --> 00:17:40,748
Now, it doesn't have to be like this.
436
00:17:39,132 --> 00:17:42,072
Are you kidding?
437
00:17:40,770 --> 00:17:44,720
You humiliated me in front of everyone.
438
00:17:42,383 --> 00:17:47,843
Well, you disrespected me when
you showed up with your ribs.
439
00:17:44,848 --> 00:17:49,658
Oh, you want to talk about disrespect?
440
00:17:47,866 --> 00:17:52,846
I offered to help you out,
and you gave me napkins.
441
00:17:49,689 --> 00:17:54,989
I mean, sure, I knocked napkins
442
00:17:53,029 --> 00:17:57,219
straight out of the park, but...
443
00:17:55,011 --> 00:17:59,251
Come on, Dave.
444
00:17:57,728 --> 00:18:01,408
Look, you got to look at this
from where I'm standing.
445
00:17:59,276 --> 00:18:04,326
I've been hosting the
Yardecue for a decade.
446
00:18:01,587 --> 00:18:07,217
Now, here you come, just
trying to take it over.
447
00:18:04,354 --> 00:18:09,844
That's not what I'm
trying to do at all.
448
00:18:07,238 --> 00:18:11,878
I just want to be a part
of the neighborhood.
449
00:18:09,997 --> 00:18:13,587
Look, I know, all right?
450
00:18:11,899 --> 00:18:15,359
But you just got here.
451
00:18:13,612 --> 00:18:16,902
You haven't earned it yet.
452
00:18:15,378 --> 00:18:18,508
It took me 20 years
453
00:18:16,931 --> 00:18:20,181
to be put in charge of the Yardecue.
454
00:18:18,528 --> 00:18:22,388
Three people had to die.
455
00:18:20,211 --> 00:18:26,611
Two of old age and one of Old Miss Kim.
456
00:18:23,286 --> 00:18:30,826
Look, man, what I'm saying
457
00:18:29,347 --> 00:18:34,837
is that people have been
waiting a long time,
458
00:18:30,852 --> 00:18:36,952
and you just can't go
skipping the line.
459
00:18:34,865 --> 00:18:38,915
That's not what you
told me at Disneyland.
460
00:18:36,997 --> 00:18:45,397
But I gotcha.
461
00:18:43,927 --> 00:18:46,557
Good. We're cool?
462
00:18:45,419 --> 00:18:48,379
- Yeah, we're cool.
- Cool, man.
463
00:18:46,579 --> 00:18:50,269
Come on, let's go back
outside and have a beer.
464
00:18:48,399 --> 00:18:51,749
- Man, come on.
- Okay.
465
00:18:50,290 --> 00:18:53,100
Hey, so, next year...
466
00:18:51,768 --> 00:18:54,148
potato salad?
467
00:18:53,118 --> 00:18:55,708
I'll give you ice.
468
00:18:54,169 --> 00:18:59,789
Marty's gonna be so jealous.
469
00:18:57,451 --> 00:19:07,941
Hey, Vanessa.
470
00:19:06,355 --> 00:19:09,465
Hey, guys. What's up?
471
00:19:07,971 --> 00:19:10,911
When-when you walked by,
472
00:19:09,491 --> 00:19:13,901
- uh, earlier...
- Earlier, we was just wondering...
473
00:19:10,941 --> 00:19:15,771
You know, um... Which one of us...
474
00:19:13,930 --> 00:19:17,500
Amateurs.
475
00:19:15,796 --> 00:19:23,176
See? I told you
476
00:19:21,644 --> 00:19:24,634
you could rock those earrings.
477
00:19:23,198 --> 00:19:26,528
You just needed to adjust your look.
478
00:19:24,659 --> 00:19:28,559
And I told you you could
rock that blouse.
479
00:19:26,549 --> 00:19:30,419
You just needed the right accessories.
480
00:19:28,582 --> 00:19:32,782
- [CHUCKLES]
- What up, Harriet Tubman?
481
00:19:30,444 --> 00:19:37,064
Aw, hell, no.
482
00:19:35,828 --> 00:19:42,578
- Synced and corrected by martythecrazy -
- www.addic7ed.com -
483
00:19:37,577 --> 00:19:45,117
So? What do you think?
484
00:19:42,874 --> 00:19:48,584
I got to admit, Dave, not bad.
485
00:19:46,004 --> 00:19:51,584
I told you you'd like my tang.
486
00:19:49,521 --> 00:19:53,991
That's it. I'm done.