1
00:00:01,251 --> 00:00:02,786
NADJA:
Guillermo, I found another one!

2
00:00:02,820 --> 00:00:04,622
[LAUGHS]
Here. Right here.

3
00:00:04,655 --> 00:00:06,290
-LASZLO: Gizmo, here's one.
-Oh!

4
00:00:06,324 --> 00:00:09,927
Come on, boy.
Making it three to the Laszlo.

5
00:00:09,960 --> 00:00:10,994
NANDOR:
Guillermo.

6
00:00:11,028 --> 00:00:13,331
Big one here.

7
00:00:13,364 --> 00:00:15,265
-Right here.
-We are playing a game

8
00:00:15,299 --> 00:00:16,910
-that Guillermo made up.
-It's not a game.

9
00:00:16,934 --> 00:00:19,470
We have been burying bodies
out here for ages,

10
00:00:19,503 --> 00:00:21,138
thus creating sink spots.

11
00:00:21,171 --> 00:00:23,240
It's caused by decomposing
human cadavers.

12
00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:25,443
-It's a wonderful game.
-It's a safety hazard.

13
00:00:25,476 --> 00:00:28,779
I'm winning!

14
00:00:28,812 --> 00:00:30,414
And then my master
came into the room.

15
00:00:30,448 --> 00:00:32,983
It turns out it was Nadja
who had moved the couch, so...

16
00:00:33,016 --> 00:00:34,485
[SCREAMS]
What the fuck?!

17
00:00:34,518 --> 00:00:35,586
[SCREAMING]

18
00:00:35,619 --> 00:00:36,830
Give me your hand!
Give me your hand!

19
00:00:36,854 --> 00:00:39,089
[SCREAMS]
What the fuck?!

20
00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:41,024
-Get me out of here!
-[GAGGING]

21
00:00:41,058 --> 00:00:43,193
["YOU'RE DEAD"
BY NORMA TANEGA PLAYING]

22
00:00:43,226 --> 00:00:45,663
♪ Don't sing if you want
to live long ♪

23
00:00:45,696 --> 00:00:48,165
♪ They have no use
for your song ♪

24
00:00:48,198 --> 00:00:50,834
♪ You're dead, you're dead,
you're dead ♪

25
00:00:50,868 --> 00:00:53,737
♪ You're dead
and out of this world ♪

26
00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:58,342
♪ Now your hope and compassion
is gone ♪

27
00:00:58,376 --> 00:01:01,144
♪ You sold out your dream
to the world ♪

28
00:01:01,178 --> 00:01:03,447
♪ Stay dead, stay dead,
stay dead ♪

29
00:01:03,481 --> 00:01:06,149
♪ You're dead
and out of this world. ♪

30
00:01:06,183 --> 00:01:09,186
♪

31
00:01:15,593 --> 00:01:17,695
Hey, this one's extra juicy.

32
00:01:17,728 --> 00:01:19,397
I think it's a three-personer.

33
00:01:19,430 --> 00:01:21,307
-Three points for me! -Ugh, damn it.
-LASZLO: You're wrong.

34
00:01:21,331 --> 00:01:23,901
Graves are worth one.
Three is for the body.

35
00:01:23,934 --> 00:01:25,736
What the...?
Who threw a fucking dagger?

36
00:01:25,769 --> 00:01:26,804
COLIN:
Ooh.

37
00:01:26,837 --> 00:01:29,740
[CACKLING]

38
00:01:29,773 --> 00:01:30,741
Whoa.

39
00:01:30,774 --> 00:01:32,510
NANDOR:
Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay.

40
00:01:32,543 --> 00:01:35,546
[LAUGHS FIENDISHLY]

41
00:01:35,579 --> 00:01:38,248
I have waited ages for this.

42
00:01:38,281 --> 00:01:42,152
And now
I finally have you cornered.

43
00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:45,222
Please, Mr. Mystery Man,
do not harm me.

44
00:01:45,255 --> 00:01:48,025
If you wish to kill someone,
kill my familiar.

45
00:01:48,058 --> 00:01:51,194
It won't be as satisfying,
but it will be much easier.

46
00:01:51,228 --> 00:01:54,231
Silence!
I am not here for you.

47
00:01:54,264 --> 00:01:56,266
-NADJA: Oh.
-That's a relief. -Nor you.

48
00:01:56,299 --> 00:01:57,835
Thank you very much.
That's nice.

49
00:01:57,868 --> 00:02:00,270
Scuse me, are you possibly here
to kill me?

50
00:02:00,303 --> 00:02:01,338
-No.
-'Cause if you are,

51
00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:03,040
I just need to run in and...

52
00:02:03,073 --> 00:02:04,041
Silence.

53
00:02:04,074 --> 00:02:05,909
I am here...

54
00:02:05,943 --> 00:02:07,377
for him.

55
00:02:07,411 --> 00:02:09,246
For me?

56
00:02:09,279 --> 00:02:11,081
Well, why the hell
would you be here for me?

57
00:02:11,114 --> 00:02:12,550
And who the hell are you anyway?

58
00:02:12,583 --> 00:02:13,684
[CHUCKLES]

59
00:02:13,717 --> 00:02:16,954
I have gone by so many names,

60
00:02:16,987 --> 00:02:20,958
all of them feared
on the whispers of time.

61
00:02:20,991 --> 00:02:22,793
[CHUCKLES]

62
00:02:25,429 --> 00:02:27,465
Hello, Laszlo.

63
00:02:27,498 --> 00:02:29,467
Uh, hello.

64
00:02:29,500 --> 00:02:31,068
I can see by the look
on your face

65
00:02:31,101 --> 00:02:34,104
you were never expecting
to see me again.

66
00:02:34,137 --> 00:02:35,449
No, you can see
by the look on my face

67
00:02:35,473 --> 00:02:37,283
I haven't got a fucking clue
who the hell you are.

68
00:02:37,307 --> 00:02:39,610
[CHUCKLES]
Nice try.

69
00:02:39,643 --> 00:02:41,979
Like you don't remember
what went down in California.

70
00:02:44,114 --> 00:02:46,584
I rented you a guest room.

71
00:02:47,618 --> 00:02:49,152
Oh, yes.

72
00:02:49,186 --> 00:02:52,089
I did take a brief sojourn
to the Golden State.

73
00:02:52,122 --> 00:02:53,457
I didn't want to go.

74
00:02:53,491 --> 00:02:55,268
Well, you weren't invited.
It was a work trip.

75
00:02:55,292 --> 00:02:57,995
-And I wasn't invited.
-I was... I had agreed to meet the Devil

76
00:02:58,028 --> 00:03:00,063
at an intersection of roadways,

77
00:03:00,097 --> 00:03:02,265
where we'd do a deal
where I would become

78
00:03:02,299 --> 00:03:03,934
a much better guitarist.

79
00:03:03,967 --> 00:03:06,637
I thought the Devil's crossroads
was in Mississippi.

80
00:03:06,670 --> 00:03:09,106
Exactly. I was misinformed.

81
00:03:09,139 --> 00:03:10,974
-Oh, yes.
-Yes, yes, yes.

82
00:03:11,008 --> 00:03:12,409
Are you keeping well?

83
00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:14,578
Not good, Master Cravensworth.

84
00:03:14,612 --> 00:03:16,480
You remember I rented you a room

85
00:03:16,514 --> 00:03:18,916
in my beach house in San Diego?

86
00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:21,519
-I do. Beautiful part of the world.
-Yes.

87
00:03:21,552 --> 00:03:23,954
And you skipped out
without paying me

88
00:03:23,987 --> 00:03:25,322
the last month's rent.

89
00:03:25,355 --> 00:03:27,324
-[GROANS]
-And the security deposit.

90
00:03:27,357 --> 00:03:28,526
-Laszlo.
-Yeah.

91
00:03:28,559 --> 00:03:29,927
'Cause if I remember correctly,

92
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:30,928
I walked into the john,

93
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:32,863
and someone had left
a huge floater.

94
00:03:32,896 --> 00:03:36,700
That may be,
but you took me for a fool.

95
00:03:36,734 --> 00:03:37,768
You swindled me.

96
00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:41,805
I have spent
167 years searching for you.

97
00:03:41,839 --> 00:03:44,274
[LAUGHS]:
And now, oh-oh-oh...

98
00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:46,443
satisfaction will be mine.

99
00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:47,678
All right.

100
00:03:47,711 --> 00:03:49,647
Either you repay your debt now,

101
00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:51,715
or you will pay with your life.

102
00:03:51,749 --> 00:03:54,384
The money or a duel!

103
00:03:54,417 --> 00:03:56,286
-Pay him. Pay him the money.
-No. No, no.

104
00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:58,031
-Pay him the money.
-Pay him some money. Just pay the debt.

105
00:03:58,055 --> 00:03:59,356
I'm not paying for shit,

106
00:03:59,389 --> 00:04:01,792
so a duel it is.

107
00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:04,327
-Oh, no.
-NANDOR: Shitting...

108
00:04:04,361 --> 00:04:05,963
Hold this.

109
00:04:05,996 --> 00:04:07,731
-NADJA: Whoo! Go on, Laszlo!
-[BOTH HISSING]

110
00:04:07,765 --> 00:04:08,732
NANDOR:
Get it out, get it out.

111
00:04:08,766 --> 00:04:10,333
NADJA:
Very masculine.

112
00:04:10,367 --> 00:04:13,971
That's right.
Scare him with your circles.

113
00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:14,972
COLIN:
Give him hell, Laszlo.

114
00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:16,473
NANDOR:
Okay, okay. Thank you.

115
00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:18,075
[BOTH CONTINUE HISSING]

116
00:04:18,108 --> 00:04:21,044
What is done tonight
may not be undone.

117
00:04:21,078 --> 00:04:22,580
Do both combatants agree?

118
00:04:22,613 --> 00:04:24,481
Courage and honor.

119
00:04:24,514 --> 00:04:27,585
Aye. Courage and honor.

120
00:04:28,619 --> 00:04:30,487
Then the die is cast.

121
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:32,389
Both combatants, please,

122
00:04:32,422 --> 00:04:34,424
you will stand back-to-back.

123
00:04:34,457 --> 00:04:36,894
Then you will take ten paces.

124
00:04:36,927 --> 00:04:37,895
Then...

125
00:04:37,928 --> 00:04:39,597
you will unleash hell.

126
00:04:40,430 --> 00:04:42,532
And...

127
00:04:42,566 --> 00:04:44,234
one pace.

128
00:04:44,267 --> 00:04:46,436
Two. Good.
No peeking, now.

129
00:04:46,469 --> 00:04:47,838
Three.

130
00:04:47,871 --> 00:04:49,439
-Four...
-NADJA: Laszlo!

131
00:04:49,472 --> 00:04:52,109
-Laszlo, no! That's not courageous!
-Bat!

132
00:04:52,142 --> 00:04:54,177
[HORN BLARING] -He's
not coming back, you know.

133
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:56,013
Are you kidding me?

134
00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:57,223
-NANDOR: Sorry about that.
-[GROANS]

135
00:04:57,247 --> 00:05:00,550
Oops. He found the big one.

136
00:05:00,584 --> 00:05:03,153
-Cravensworth!
-Yeesh.

137
00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:10,127
♪

138
00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:11,962
LASZLO:
Am I a coward?

139
00:05:11,995 --> 00:05:13,463
Of course not.

140
00:05:13,496 --> 00:05:16,399
There is no honor in defeat.

141
00:05:16,433 --> 00:05:18,035
-[GRUNTS]
-I've never paid the piper

142
00:05:18,068 --> 00:05:19,803
in my life,

143
00:05:19,837 --> 00:05:21,271
and I won't start now.

144
00:05:21,304 --> 00:05:22,906
-[BLOWS]
-I suppose

145
00:05:22,940 --> 00:05:25,442
it won't surprise thee to learn

146
00:05:25,475 --> 00:05:28,445
that I've prepared
for a night such as this.

147
00:05:28,478 --> 00:05:31,982
-So, my sweet angel...
-[EXHALES SHARPLY]

148
00:05:32,015 --> 00:05:35,152
it is here
that I bid you farewell,

149
00:05:35,185 --> 00:05:37,554
for tonight is the night

150
00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:40,924
that I must disappear forever.

151
00:05:40,958 --> 00:05:42,259
Love,

152
00:05:42,292 --> 00:05:43,961
the man formerly known...

153
00:05:43,994 --> 00:05:45,428
as...

154
00:05:45,462 --> 00:05:47,097
Laszlo.

155
00:05:48,699 --> 00:05:51,134
Forgive me, my darling.

156
00:05:51,168 --> 00:05:53,671
♪

157
00:05:53,704 --> 00:05:55,472
[GROANS]
There we are.

158
00:05:55,505 --> 00:05:57,708
Blue jeans.

159
00:05:58,475 --> 00:05:59,977
And my toothpick.

160
00:06:00,010 --> 00:06:01,578
My foolproof human disguise

161
00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:04,347
for whenever
the shit hits the wind.

162
00:06:04,381 --> 00:06:05,983
Makes me
completely unrecognizable.

163
00:06:08,485 --> 00:06:10,821
[MOOS]

164
00:06:13,390 --> 00:06:16,226
[UPBEAT COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING]

165
00:06:20,563 --> 00:06:22,866
-How you diddling, Joe-Joe?
-Yep.

166
00:06:22,900 --> 00:06:26,136
Your wife still giving you shit
over that hammock?

167
00:06:26,169 --> 00:06:28,205
After all that nonsense
on Staten Island,

168
00:06:28,238 --> 00:06:30,674
I cut loose to Pennsylvania,

169
00:06:30,708 --> 00:06:32,843
because it sounded
like "Transylvania."

170
00:06:32,876 --> 00:06:35,145
And we all know
that sounds cool.

171
00:06:35,178 --> 00:06:37,380
I infiltrated the township
posing as

172
00:06:37,414 --> 00:06:39,382
your average
American Yankee Doodle Dandy.

173
00:06:39,416 --> 00:06:41,651
And I took over
Lucky Brew's Bar and Grill.

174
00:06:41,685 --> 00:06:43,453
-MAN: Yeah!
-The previous owner,

175
00:06:43,486 --> 00:06:44,688
he mysteriously disappeared...

176
00:06:44,722 --> 00:06:46,323
Because I killed him.

177
00:06:46,356 --> 00:06:49,659
-Drinks on the house!
-[SHOUTING, WHOOPING]

178
00:06:49,693 --> 00:06:51,328
And I have not
looked back since.

179
00:06:51,361 --> 00:06:53,463
I now go by the name of Daytona.

180
00:06:53,496 --> 00:06:54,865
Jackie Daytona.

181
00:06:54,898 --> 00:06:56,700
And I'll tell you something.

182
00:06:56,734 --> 00:06:59,636
Jackie Daytona's life,
it ain't so bad.

183
00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:01,338
Not bad at all.

184
00:07:01,371 --> 00:07:03,216
["SIMPLY IRRESISTIBLE"
BY ROBERT PALMER PLAYING]

185
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:04,341
MAN:
Yeah!

186
00:07:04,374 --> 00:07:07,177
[OTHERS SHOUTING, WHOOPING]

187
00:07:07,210 --> 00:07:08,746
♪

188
00:07:08,779 --> 00:07:11,481
LUCY: I've been in this town
a long time,

189
00:07:11,514 --> 00:07:14,151
and we've never really met
someone like Jackie.

190
00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:17,020
LASZLO: No one here
knows I'm a vampire,

191
00:07:17,054 --> 00:07:18,698
apart from the people
I've drained and killed,

192
00:07:18,722 --> 00:07:20,323
but they're dead now,
so that problem's

193
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:22,192
pretty much solved itself.

194
00:07:22,225 --> 00:07:24,027
♪ That kind of love
is mythical ♪

195
00:07:24,061 --> 00:07:25,162
This will blow your mind.

196
00:07:25,195 --> 00:07:26,830
-[BASS SINGING]
-Huh?

197
00:07:26,864 --> 00:07:28,007
LUCY:
He has a really big heart.

198
00:07:28,031 --> 00:07:29,266
How the hell does that work?

199
00:07:29,299 --> 00:07:30,934
Hardly anyone cared

200
00:07:30,968 --> 00:07:32,611
about the volleyball team
until he came around.

201
00:07:32,635 --> 00:07:34,137
COACH SWANSON:
Up, up, up!

202
00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:37,674
-[CHEERING]
-Yeah! Unlucky!

203
00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:40,010
We weren't doing real well.
Uh, we were losing a lot.

204
00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,679
♪ When there's no other course ♪

205
00:07:42,712 --> 00:07:45,248
And, uh, Jackie Daytona
shows up, and, suddenly,

206
00:07:45,282 --> 00:07:46,793
balls are going
where they're supposed to go.

207
00:07:46,817 --> 00:07:48,457
-You got this. Nice! Set!
-Come on, girls.

208
00:07:48,485 --> 00:07:50,720
I'm pretty sure
he's the X factor.

209
00:07:50,754 --> 00:07:52,022
LASZLO:
There we go!

210
00:07:52,055 --> 00:07:53,590
Superb!

211
00:07:54,792 --> 00:07:55,692
♪ Simply irresistible ♪

212
00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:57,194
LASZLO:
While I'm in disguise,

213
00:07:57,227 --> 00:07:58,428
I can't fly.

214
00:07:58,461 --> 00:08:01,398
So I got myself one of these.

215
00:08:01,431 --> 00:08:04,267
Let's go, Bucks.

216
00:08:04,301 --> 00:08:06,804
[GRUNTING] -I've truly
grown to love this township.

217
00:08:06,837 --> 00:08:08,806
So I have rid it of
some motor-bicycle criminals.

218
00:08:08,839 --> 00:08:10,740
You better hit the bricks

219
00:08:10,774 --> 00:08:12,709
before I put my foot
up your ass.

220
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:14,878
WAYNE:
Every year, me and the boys

221
00:08:14,912 --> 00:08:17,080
go on a charity run
to raise money for kids.

222
00:08:17,114 --> 00:08:18,381
We're just on a weekend ride

223
00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:20,617
to raise money
for Toys for Tots.

224
00:08:20,650 --> 00:08:23,086
And he came out of nowhere
and beat the shit out of us.

225
00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:26,056
How 'bout I put this toy
where the moon don't shine?

226
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:28,258
♪ She leaves me in awe,
she deserves the applause ♪

227
00:08:28,291 --> 00:08:29,426
He's really mysterious.

228
00:08:29,459 --> 00:08:30,660
And modest.
He covered up

229
00:08:30,693 --> 00:08:32,262
all the mirrors in the bar.

230
00:08:32,295 --> 00:08:35,665
♪ But now I find her ♪

231
00:08:35,698 --> 00:08:37,243
COACH SWANSON:
When you're Jackie Daytona,

232
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:39,402
you can do whatever you want,
'cause you change lives.

233
00:08:39,436 --> 00:08:41,104
LUCY:
Jackie Daytona really

234
00:08:41,138 --> 00:08:42,272
inspires me.

235
00:08:42,305 --> 00:08:44,842
LASZLO: It may have sprung
from necessity,

236
00:08:44,875 --> 00:08:47,777
but now I feel
as though I may never depart.

237
00:08:47,811 --> 00:08:50,480
♪ Simply irresistible. ♪

238
00:08:50,513 --> 00:08:52,682
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

239
00:08:52,715 --> 00:08:54,484
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING, CHEERING]

240
00:08:54,517 --> 00:08:56,119
LASZLO:
We made it!

241
00:08:56,153 --> 00:08:58,155
Drinks are on Jackie Daytona!

242
00:08:58,188 --> 00:09:00,257
-[CHEERING, APPLAUSE]
-Yes.

243
00:09:00,290 --> 00:09:02,860
Okay, okay, okay, everybody!

244
00:09:02,893 --> 00:09:05,162
Ah, you know,
we've had a rough year.

245
00:09:05,195 --> 00:09:06,496
But tonight...

246
00:09:06,529 --> 00:09:08,765
we qualified for State!

247
00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:10,467
[CHEERING, WHOOPING]

248
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:12,102
Great work!

249
00:09:12,135 --> 00:09:13,971
I want to take a second
to thank everybody

250
00:09:14,004 --> 00:09:17,640
and, most of all,
a huge, huge thank you...

251
00:09:17,674 --> 00:09:19,943
Yes... to our friend,
Mr. Jackie Daytona!

252
00:09:19,977 --> 00:09:22,880
ALL:
We love you, Jackie!

253
00:09:22,913 --> 00:09:25,215
Jackie, if it were not for you,

254
00:09:25,248 --> 00:09:26,984
we wouldn't be here.

255
00:09:27,017 --> 00:09:28,227
You're the heart and soul
of this team, sir.

256
00:09:28,251 --> 00:09:29,362
-Yes, you are!
-MAN: Yes, you are.

257
00:09:29,386 --> 00:09:31,621
I am just a regular human guy.

258
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:33,523
-Oh... -No, you're not.
-MAN: Come on.

259
00:09:33,556 --> 00:09:35,158
And, unfortunately, now...

260
00:09:35,192 --> 00:09:37,794
I got to deliver
some pretty tough news.

261
00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:40,663
Due to state budget cuts,

262
00:09:40,697 --> 00:09:43,901
we are no longer able to afford
this year's tournament fees.

263
00:09:43,934 --> 00:09:46,904
And, therefore, we...

264
00:09:46,937 --> 00:09:48,671
we're not going to State.

265
00:09:48,705 --> 00:09:50,240
-You what?
-[GASPING, MURMURING]

266
00:09:50,273 --> 00:09:52,075
I'm so sorry, Jackie.

267
00:09:52,109 --> 00:09:53,510
[GASPING]

268
00:09:53,543 --> 00:09:55,879
I need some air!

269
00:09:55,913 --> 00:09:58,248
It makes no sense to me either,

270
00:09:58,281 --> 00:10:00,383
that I would fall in love
with volleyball.

271
00:10:00,417 --> 00:10:02,685
But, you know what,
I've come to love those Bucks.

272
00:10:02,719 --> 00:10:04,854
I love the popcorn, the squeak

273
00:10:04,888 --> 00:10:07,824
of the tennis shoes
on the court.

274
00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:10,593
And I promised I'd never get
emotional in front of you chaps,

275
00:10:10,627 --> 00:10:12,195
but...

276
00:10:12,229 --> 00:10:15,398
I didn't scrape and murder
my way to Pennsylvania

277
00:10:15,432 --> 00:10:18,735
to watch those talented athletes
get fucked off.

278
00:10:18,768 --> 00:10:20,070
♪

279
00:10:25,742 --> 00:10:27,020
I don't mind saying
I need your help, Billy Bass.

280
00:10:27,044 --> 00:10:28,245
I'm shit out of ideas.

281
00:10:28,278 --> 00:10:30,580
Penny for your thoughts.

282
00:10:30,613 --> 00:10:33,283
I think we'll need more
than a penny, Luce.

283
00:10:33,316 --> 00:10:34,928
Those poor girls,
they didn't deserve that.

284
00:10:34,952 --> 00:10:37,220
You got a big heart, Jackie.

285
00:10:37,254 --> 00:10:38,788
Everyone in this town
knows that.

286
00:10:38,821 --> 00:10:39,856
Mm.

287
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:42,592
I just wish I understood you.

288
00:10:42,625 --> 00:10:44,294
You're such a mystery.

289
00:10:44,327 --> 00:10:46,463
You say you're from Tucson,
but you talk

290
00:10:46,496 --> 00:10:48,465
all fancy and Europe-like.

291
00:10:48,498 --> 00:10:51,068
This is the way we talk
in Tucson, Arizonia.

292
00:10:51,101 --> 00:10:54,904
If only there was some way
to help that volleyball team.

293
00:10:54,938 --> 00:10:57,240
♪ She's so fine ♪

294
00:10:57,274 --> 00:11:00,810
♪ There's no telling
where the money went ♪

295
00:11:00,843 --> 00:11:03,580
♪ She's all mine... ♪ -Whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, there.

296
00:11:03,613 --> 00:11:05,315
You never told me
you could sing like that.

297
00:11:05,348 --> 00:11:08,485
Not only that,
you can sing real damn good.

298
00:11:08,518 --> 00:11:10,087
That's given me an idea.

299
00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:12,956
I say, an incredible idea.

300
00:11:12,990 --> 00:11:14,491
♪

301
00:11:14,524 --> 00:11:17,260
Jackie Daytona has
a major-league plan.

302
00:11:17,294 --> 00:11:20,063
Talent show tomorrow,
here in the pub.

303
00:11:20,097 --> 00:11:21,764
We charge five bucks a ticket.

304
00:11:21,798 --> 00:11:23,977
Imagine the amount of money
we'll raise for these girls.

305
00:11:24,001 --> 00:11:25,468
Yes!

306
00:11:25,502 --> 00:11:27,904
This town's full of talent.

307
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:29,106
He's getting into it.

308
00:11:29,139 --> 00:11:30,673
This is gonna be spectacular.

309
00:11:30,707 --> 00:11:32,509
I know that you're
a first-rate singer.

310
00:11:32,542 --> 00:11:33,476
Talent show.

311
00:11:33,510 --> 00:11:34,511
Lucky Brew's.

312
00:11:34,544 --> 00:11:36,013
Take another one for your wife.

313
00:11:36,046 --> 00:11:37,256
You can do some impersonations.

314
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:38,291
[IMITATING BORAT]:
My wife!

315
00:11:38,315 --> 00:11:40,083
There you go. Henry VIII.

316
00:11:40,117 --> 00:11:42,252
-Support the Bucks.
-Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.

317
00:11:42,285 --> 00:11:43,920
Take a leaflet.

318
00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,422
See you tomorrow?

319
00:11:45,455 --> 00:11:46,623
Come on.

320
00:11:46,656 --> 00:11:49,526
Me, I'm pretty handy
at the old shadow puppetry.

321
00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:50,660
♪ Like a love revival ♪

322
00:11:50,693 --> 00:11:52,129
It's very scary.

323
00:11:52,162 --> 00:11:53,130
But watch this.

324
00:11:53,163 --> 00:11:54,864
[LAUGHS]:
How do you do that?

325
00:11:54,897 --> 00:11:56,133
LASZLO:
I won't goof it up.

326
00:11:56,166 --> 00:11:57,367
I promise.

327
00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:59,236
You can trust me.

328
00:12:01,238 --> 00:12:02,605
COLIN:
Playing cards

329
00:12:02,639 --> 00:12:04,841
actually were invented
by the Chinese

330
00:12:04,874 --> 00:12:06,809
in the ninth century.

331
00:12:06,843 --> 00:12:07,810
Please shut up.

332
00:12:07,844 --> 00:12:09,179
Nadja, it's your turn.

333
00:12:09,212 --> 00:12:11,981
[CRYING]

334
00:12:15,085 --> 00:12:17,487
-Yes, you should go speak to her.
-I can step in.

335
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:19,289
-No, you can't.
-All right.

336
00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:21,458
I just couldn't sit there
playing games

337
00:12:21,491 --> 00:12:25,462
when my Laszlo is so fragile
and out there just all alone!

338
00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:28,198
He survived this far, so...

339
00:12:28,231 --> 00:12:29,332
-COLIN: Hello.
-Oh, um...

340
00:12:29,366 --> 00:12:31,201
not now, Colin Robinson.

341
00:12:31,234 --> 00:12:32,702
I'm actually just checking in.

342
00:12:32,735 --> 00:12:35,472
You seem to be having
a difficult time

343
00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:37,307
now that Laszlo left you

344
00:12:37,340 --> 00:12:38,508
and is likely dead.

345
00:12:39,409 --> 00:12:42,512
You seem... you know, so lonely.

346
00:12:42,545 --> 00:12:45,082
-[CRYING]: I am so lonely!
-Yeah.

347
00:12:45,115 --> 00:12:47,784
You know,
you don't need to be lonely.

348
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,288
Thanks.

349
00:12:54,257 --> 00:12:56,059
No. No.

350
00:12:56,093 --> 00:12:57,660
-No?
-No.

351
00:12:57,694 --> 00:12:59,996
-No?
-No. No.

352
00:13:00,029 --> 00:13:02,832
[CHUCKLES]: No, I wasn't...
actually trying to kiss Nadja.

353
00:13:02,865 --> 00:13:05,935
It's just that
the unwanted kiss rejection

354
00:13:05,968 --> 00:13:08,004
is one of the most awkward

355
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:10,006
interactions you can have
and, therefore,

356
00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:12,442
the most delicious form
of energy draining.

357
00:13:12,475 --> 00:13:15,044
'Cause I w...
I was getting a bit of a-a vibe.

358
00:13:15,078 --> 00:13:16,613
-No way.
-Okay.

359
00:13:16,646 --> 00:13:18,515
It was like
a Thanksgiving feast.

360
00:13:18,548 --> 00:13:20,049
Mwah. [LAUGHS]

361
00:13:20,083 --> 00:13:21,551
If I wasn't married...
[CHUCKLES]

362
00:13:21,584 --> 00:13:23,720
And you were
a completely different person...

363
00:13:23,753 --> 00:13:27,757
You know, I wanted to check
on all the walls of the house.

364
00:13:27,790 --> 00:13:28,858
See you around.

365
00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:30,427
Every day in every room...

366
00:13:30,460 --> 00:13:31,561
Yeah.

367
00:13:31,594 --> 00:13:33,062
-...on forever.
-I live here.

368
00:13:33,096 --> 00:13:34,897
We're gonna be bumping
into each other a lot.

369
00:13:34,931 --> 00:13:36,099
[CHUCKLES]

370
00:13:36,133 --> 00:13:37,867
So, what's your deal?

371
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,970
I did, however, try to kiss

372
00:13:41,003 --> 00:13:42,805
the Nadja doll, and...

373
00:13:42,839 --> 00:13:45,308
its rejection, uh... stung.

374
00:13:45,342 --> 00:13:47,810
♪

375
00:13:48,845 --> 00:13:50,647
Come on, Joe, drink up.

376
00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:53,116
I don't want
Carol ringing here again.

377
00:13:54,951 --> 00:13:56,986
I'm about to close, friend-o.

378
00:13:57,019 --> 00:13:59,622
Anything quick
I can rustle you...

379
00:13:59,656 --> 00:14:00,890
up?

380
00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:03,726
Uh, one human alcohol beer,
please.

381
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,828
Coming right up.

382
00:14:05,862 --> 00:14:08,465
One human alcohol beer it is.

383
00:14:08,498 --> 00:14:10,333
You don't mind if I join you,
do you?

384
00:14:10,367 --> 00:14:11,401
Please do.

385
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:13,002
So, what blows you into town?

386
00:14:13,035 --> 00:14:14,337
Oh, just, uh...

387
00:14:14,371 --> 00:14:16,839
passing through.

388
00:14:16,873 --> 00:14:18,151
Judging by that look
on your face,

389
00:14:18,175 --> 00:14:19,685
I'd say there's something
on your mind.

390
00:14:19,709 --> 00:14:23,180
I suppose I can trust you.

391
00:14:23,213 --> 00:14:24,647
After all, you're clearly

392
00:14:24,681 --> 00:14:28,017
just a regular human bartender.

393
00:14:28,050 --> 00:14:30,153
-Mm.
-The jeans, the toothpick.

394
00:14:30,187 --> 00:14:31,921
Salt of the earth.

395
00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:33,122
-[CHUCKLES]
-That's all I am.

396
00:14:33,156 --> 00:14:35,758
Just a regular human

397
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:37,460
bartender.

398
00:14:37,494 --> 00:14:38,828
Ah.

399
00:14:38,861 --> 00:14:41,331
Mmm.

400
00:14:41,364 --> 00:14:43,099
To tell the truth,

401
00:14:43,132 --> 00:14:45,935
I've been scouring
the area for a while now.

402
00:14:45,968 --> 00:14:48,705
I'm hunting a shady character.

403
00:14:48,738 --> 00:14:50,673
Ah.

404
00:14:50,707 --> 00:14:52,809
- "Shady character," you say?
-Yes.

405
00:14:52,842 --> 00:14:54,010
Great pint.

406
00:14:54,043 --> 00:14:55,678
Laszlo's his name.

407
00:14:55,712 --> 00:14:57,514
A slippery heathen more vile

408
00:14:57,547 --> 00:14:59,616
than the most vile villain.

409
00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:02,118
A pestilence masquerading
as a man.

410
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,796
-A cowardly worm of a person!
-All right, all right, all right.

411
00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:05,788
I get your point, stranger.

412
00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:07,557
-Sounds like a regular wacko.
-[GROANS]

413
00:15:07,590 --> 00:15:08,858
A real son of a bitch.

414
00:15:08,891 --> 00:15:10,126
-Yes.
-I'll keep

415
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:12,229
my peepers peeled for that guy.

416
00:15:12,262 --> 00:15:15,798
Well, then, uh,
I will get out of your hair.

417
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,367
Thank you
for the strong beverage

418
00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:18,568
and your time.

419
00:15:18,601 --> 00:15:19,569
My pleasure.

420
00:15:19,602 --> 00:15:22,171
But if you see anybody

421
00:15:22,205 --> 00:15:24,241
that seems off...

422
00:15:26,075 --> 00:15:27,544
...give me a call.

423
00:15:27,577 --> 00:15:29,579
Nice to meet you,
Jim the Vampire.

424
00:15:31,414 --> 00:15:32,682
How...

425
00:15:32,715 --> 00:15:35,418
did you know my name?

426
00:15:38,255 --> 00:15:41,691
It's printed on your card
very clearly.

427
00:15:41,724 --> 00:15:43,693
Oh. Right.
[LAUGHS]

428
00:15:43,726 --> 00:15:46,162
-Eh, well, good night.
-Good night.

429
00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,498
-Oh.
-[CHUCKLES]

430
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:51,000
That was too fucking close
for comfort.

431
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:53,703
The smart thing to do now
would be to get out of town.

432
00:15:53,736 --> 00:15:55,705
I mean, that's what
Laszlo would do.

433
00:15:55,738 --> 00:15:58,174
But I'm not Laszlo.
I'm Jackie Daytona.

434
00:15:58,207 --> 00:16:00,610
And I made a promise
to this town.

435
00:16:07,149 --> 00:16:08,394
-LASZLO: Give me a "hell yeah!"
-CROWD: Hell yeah!

436
00:16:08,418 --> 00:16:09,586
[CHEERING]

437
00:16:09,619 --> 00:16:11,921
Wasn't that something?

438
00:16:11,954 --> 00:16:14,724
Now, listen, I want to thank
everyone for coming down.

439
00:16:14,757 --> 00:16:18,194
We have raised the money
to send these girls to State!

440
00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,796
[CHEERING, APPLAUSE]

441
00:16:19,829 --> 00:16:21,898
Way to go, Bucks!

442
00:16:21,931 --> 00:16:23,132
You enjoy yourself.

443
00:16:23,165 --> 00:16:24,243
If you want me,
I'll be at the bar.

444
00:16:24,267 --> 00:16:25,902
Take it away, Luce.

445
00:16:25,935 --> 00:16:28,104
[CHEERING, APPLAUSE]

446
00:16:29,439 --> 00:16:30,740
LUCY:
Hello, everyone.

447
00:16:30,773 --> 00:16:33,443
I, uh, don't normally do
much singing in public,

448
00:16:33,476 --> 00:16:37,280
but a very good friend gave me
the strength to be up here.

449
00:16:37,314 --> 00:16:39,549
This one's for you, Jackie.

450
00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:41,226
-["SIMPLY IRRESISTIBLE" PLAYING]
-GIRLS: We love you, Jackie!

451
00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:43,219
[CHEERING, APPLAUSE]

452
00:16:43,252 --> 00:16:46,055
♪ How can it be permissible? ♪

453
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:49,292
♪ Mmm ♪

454
00:16:50,593 --> 00:16:53,229
♪ She compromise my principle ♪

455
00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:56,098
♪ Yeah... ♪

456
00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:00,803
I'm guessing the jig is up.

457
00:17:00,837 --> 00:17:02,605
It certainly is,

458
00:17:02,639 --> 00:17:04,106
if by "jig,"

459
00:17:04,140 --> 00:17:07,009
you mean "the varsity
volleyball team's chance"

460
00:17:07,043 --> 00:17:10,112
of going to State,"
then, yes, the jig is up.

461
00:17:10,146 --> 00:17:12,281
Oh, you were talking
about the volleyball?

462
00:17:12,315 --> 00:17:13,416
Mm, yes.

463
00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:15,251
-[EXHALES]
-I read your flyer.

464
00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:17,687
I was so heartbroken
for the team,

465
00:17:17,720 --> 00:17:21,424
I decided to come back and spare
a few bucks to help them out.

466
00:17:21,458 --> 00:17:22,525
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

467
00:17:22,559 --> 00:17:24,427
Even though
I am extremely poor...

468
00:17:24,461 --> 00:17:28,698
-Ah.
-...due to someone swindling me years ago.

469
00:17:28,731 --> 00:17:30,833
Anyway,

470
00:17:30,867 --> 00:17:33,836
your fundraiser has been
my only source of hope

471
00:17:33,870 --> 00:17:35,772
in a long, long time.

472
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,383
Well, then you'll be pleased
to know that we've raised

473
00:17:37,407 --> 00:17:40,109
enough money to send
the girls to State.

474
00:17:40,142 --> 00:17:41,778
Oh, thank goodness!

475
00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:45,382
You don't know how it warms
my heart to hear that.

476
00:17:45,415 --> 00:17:46,616
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

477
00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,685
Would you like a drink,
old-timer?

478
00:17:48,718 --> 00:17:51,153
Yes, I'll have a...

479
00:17:51,187 --> 00:17:54,991
uh, one human alcohol martini,
please.

480
00:17:55,024 --> 00:17:57,126
-Martini? An aristocrat.
-Mm.

481
00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:58,528
-[CHUCKLES]
-I like that.

482
00:17:58,561 --> 00:18:01,230
♪ The trend is irreversible ♪

483
00:18:06,603 --> 00:18:07,870
Charlatan!

484
00:18:08,871 --> 00:18:10,248
-[PEOPLE GASPING]
-LASZLO: Oh, shit.

485
00:18:10,272 --> 00:18:13,843
I'm guessing I've come
to the end of the road.

486
00:18:13,876 --> 00:18:17,013
[GASPS]
It was you the whole time.

487
00:18:17,046 --> 00:18:20,417
Prepare for your punishment,
Cravensworth.

488
00:18:20,450 --> 00:18:23,052
It will not be swift.

489
00:18:23,085 --> 00:18:24,921
Not without a fight,
me old fruit.

490
00:18:24,954 --> 00:18:26,264
-[BOTH HISSING]
-WOMAN: Oh, my God,

491
00:18:26,288 --> 00:18:27,757
-they're vampires!
-[SCREAMING]

492
00:18:27,790 --> 00:18:30,126
[SHOUTING, CLAMORING]

493
00:18:34,063 --> 00:18:36,074
-WOMAN: Oh, they're gonna kill each other!
-You had enough, old man?

494
00:18:36,098 --> 00:18:38,334
-[HISSES]
-Shit!

495
00:18:38,367 --> 00:18:40,102
[SHOUTS]

496
00:18:40,136 --> 00:18:41,070
[SCREAMING]

497
00:18:41,103 --> 00:18:42,572
[GROWLS]

498
00:18:42,605 --> 00:18:43,906
[GROANS]

499
00:18:45,775 --> 00:18:46,943
[HISSING]

500
00:18:48,445 --> 00:18:49,546
Eh.

501
00:18:51,047 --> 00:18:54,116
[GRUNTING]

502
00:18:54,150 --> 00:18:55,552
[STRAINING, SHOUTING]

503
00:18:59,922 --> 00:19:01,558
JIM: Oh, that's
going to leave a mark!

504
00:19:01,591 --> 00:19:04,193
Hey, Jim the Vampire,

505
00:19:04,226 --> 00:19:07,263
-you're fired.
-That doesn't even make any sense.

506
00:19:07,296 --> 00:19:09,065
I don't work for you.

507
00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:12,769
[SCREAMING]

508
00:19:12,802 --> 00:19:15,071
Oh, fire. Now I get it.

509
00:19:15,104 --> 00:19:16,739
-Shit!
-The money for State!

510
00:19:16,773 --> 00:19:18,641
Oh, no!

511
00:19:18,675 --> 00:19:20,242
-No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
-Oh!

512
00:19:20,276 --> 00:19:21,377
No! Get out!

513
00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:22,479
LASZLO:
Hold on, hold on.

514
00:19:22,512 --> 00:19:24,246
I've got this covered.

515
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:25,882
[GROANS]
Shit.

516
00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:27,450
JIM [CRIES]:
Oh, no.

517
00:19:27,484 --> 00:19:28,885
Ugh, no.

518
00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:31,187
Look what we've done.

519
00:19:33,289 --> 00:19:37,293
All these years
of obsession and hatred.

520
00:19:37,326 --> 00:19:39,996
-Well...
-You know who the real losers are in all this?

521
00:19:40,029 --> 00:19:42,431
The girls volleyball team.
That's who.

522
00:19:42,465 --> 00:19:46,068
Kind of puts our whole beef
in perspective, doesn't it?

523
00:19:46,102 --> 00:19:48,471
-I should say it does.
-Mm.

524
00:19:48,505 --> 00:19:50,973
That debt I owe, I shall pay it.

525
00:19:51,007 --> 00:19:53,342
And I shall pay it in full.

526
00:19:53,375 --> 00:19:55,344
Even the most wealthy
of vampires would struggle

527
00:19:55,377 --> 00:19:57,446
-to pay what you owe.
-Ah.

528
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,448
But even the most wealthy
of vampires,

529
00:19:59,482 --> 00:20:01,050
they don't own what I own.

530
00:20:03,052 --> 00:20:06,122
-This.
-What is this?

531
00:20:06,155 --> 00:20:07,757
Do you remember
the Mechanical Turk?

532
00:20:07,790 --> 00:20:09,158
Ooh, yes.

533
00:20:09,191 --> 00:20:10,536
Well, this is the same thing
in fish form.

534
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:11,961
-[LAUGHS]
-Don't ask me to explain

535
00:20:11,994 --> 00:20:14,531
how it works,
'cause it's unexplainable.

536
00:20:14,564 --> 00:20:17,600
Because there's only one
in the whole world.

537
00:20:17,634 --> 00:20:19,011
♪ Will they say I've
spent my life ♪ -[GASPS]

538
00:20:19,035 --> 00:20:20,770
-Look, look.
-Isn't it splendid?

539
00:20:20,803 --> 00:20:24,707
Oh, I have never seen
such beauty.

540
00:20:24,741 --> 00:20:26,709
[LAUGHS]

541
00:20:26,743 --> 00:20:28,511
♪ Gonna take me down... ♪

542
00:20:28,545 --> 00:20:31,948
Your debt is paid,
Laszlo Cravensworth.

543
00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:33,716
-Excelsior.
-Excelsior.

544
00:20:33,750 --> 00:20:37,987
And I apologize for
the billiard ball to the head.

545
00:20:38,020 --> 00:20:40,189
-[CHUCKLES]
-Safe passage, sir.

546
00:20:40,222 --> 00:20:42,191
♪ Still bustin' moves,
still breaking... ♪

547
00:20:42,224 --> 00:20:44,160
[DOOR OPENS]

548
00:20:44,193 --> 00:20:45,394
[EXHALES]

549
00:20:46,428 --> 00:20:47,630
-Lucy.
-[SCREAMS]

550
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,165
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

551
00:20:49,198 --> 00:20:50,800
I just came to say goodbye.

552
00:20:50,833 --> 00:20:53,035
You're a very sweet girl,
but it never would've worked.

553
00:20:53,069 --> 00:20:54,470
One, I'm married.

554
00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:58,240
Two, I'm a vampire.

555
00:20:58,274 --> 00:21:00,076
Time to get the fuck out
of here.

556
00:21:02,278 --> 00:21:04,781
[ENGINE STARTS]

557
00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:12,722
Fucking hell!

558
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:20,329
I never learned to drive,
which is a pity,

559
00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:22,498
'cause that thing cost
a fortune.

560
00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:24,266
Bat!

561
00:21:24,300 --> 00:21:26,535
So it seems that
the winding path of life...

562
00:21:26,569 --> 00:21:27,737
Guess who's back!

563
00:21:27,770 --> 00:21:29,105
...has led me back to myself.

564
00:21:29,138 --> 00:21:30,707
[SQUEALING]

565
00:21:30,740 --> 00:21:32,341
Back to Laszlo.

566
00:21:32,374 --> 00:21:33,843
Yes!

567
00:21:33,876 --> 00:21:35,945
-Everybody, my Laszlo is home!
-[LAUGHS]

568
00:21:35,978 --> 00:21:37,546
Hello, Laszlo.

569
00:21:37,580 --> 00:21:39,048
What? Is that it?

570
00:21:39,081 --> 00:21:40,683
-What?
-I've been gone ages,

571
00:21:40,717 --> 00:21:42,418
and all you can do is,
"Hello, Laszlo"?

572
00:21:42,451 --> 00:21:44,754
Please. You've been away
for, like, one week.

573
00:21:44,787 --> 00:21:47,256
Are you kidding?
I was a different person.

574
00:21:47,289 --> 00:21:49,525
I was Jackie Daytona.

575
00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:52,261
I said "Welcome back," didn't I?
Fucking guy.

576
00:21:52,294 --> 00:21:53,462
-Who cares?
-Let's go.

577
00:21:53,495 --> 00:21:55,531
-To the boudoir.
-[LAUGHS] Ooh!

578
00:21:55,564 --> 00:21:57,233
Run! I'm so horny!

579
00:21:57,266 --> 00:21:58,534
LASZLO:
Some of Jackie Daytona's

580
00:21:58,567 --> 00:22:00,703
good-naturedness
has rubbed off on me.

581
00:22:00,737 --> 00:22:02,538
I set Lucky Brew's ablaze

582
00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:04,540
and picked up
the insurance money

583
00:22:04,573 --> 00:22:06,442
to put the girls volleyball team

584
00:22:06,475 --> 00:22:07,576
through to State.

585
00:22:09,078 --> 00:22:10,647
Thing is,

586
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,749
one of the waitstaff
was still in the building,

587
00:22:12,782 --> 00:22:15,584
so I had to set fire to another
building to pay for his funeral.

588
00:22:15,618 --> 00:22:17,820
And after hypnotizing
the entire town

589
00:22:17,854 --> 00:22:20,723
into forgetting vampires
ever existed,

590
00:22:20,757 --> 00:22:23,059
I put in a good word
for a new friend.

591
00:22:23,092 --> 00:22:25,227
Nice hustle, Jessica!

592
00:22:25,261 --> 00:22:27,429
Teamwork pays off!
Very good, very good!

593
00:22:27,463 --> 00:22:31,233
Yeah! Don't be afraid
to draw blood.

594
00:22:31,267 --> 00:22:32,835
Yes!

595
00:22:32,869 --> 00:22:34,070
LASZLO:
And you know what?

596
00:22:34,103 --> 00:22:36,305
I think we could all use
a bit of Jackie Daytona

597
00:22:36,338 --> 00:22:38,307
time and again.

598
00:22:39,341 --> 00:22:40,342
Oh, no.

599
00:22:40,376 --> 00:22:42,344
Who the hell are you?

600
00:22:42,378 --> 00:22:45,447
And what on earth
are you doing in my boudoir?

601
00:22:45,481 --> 00:22:48,484
-Relax, my darling. It's me.
-Laszlo!

602
00:22:48,517 --> 00:22:50,820
You scared me half to death.

603
00:22:50,853 --> 00:22:52,354
[GASPS]
Oh.

604
00:22:52,388 --> 00:22:56,525
You're back.
So, what is your name, stranger?

605
00:22:56,558 --> 00:22:57,827
My name is Jackie.

606
00:22:57,860 --> 00:23:00,496
-Jackie Daytona.
-[CHUCKLES]

607
00:23:00,529 --> 00:23:02,531
-Come here.
-LASZLO: Ooh.

608
00:23:02,564 --> 00:23:04,176
NADJA: I want to see
if your other toothpick

609
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,302
-is made of wood.
-[LAUGHS]

610
00:23:09,571 --> 00:23:12,809
♪ Born to travel ♪

611
00:23:12,842 --> 00:23:16,278
♪ Free to roam ♪

612
00:23:16,312 --> 00:23:17,847
Get ready!

613
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:19,615
-Oh, no!
-Oh! What the...?

614
00:23:19,648 --> 00:23:20,850
[PEOPLE GASPING]

615
00:23:20,883 --> 00:23:22,284
Oh, no!

616
00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:24,120
My Mechanical Turk!
[CRYING]

617
00:23:24,153 --> 00:23:25,988
-Hey. [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]
-Oh, no!

618
00:23:26,022 --> 00:23:27,790
Hey, hey, hey.
Don't worry about it.

619
00:23:27,824 --> 00:23:29,401
You can get those anywhere.
I'll just bring you a new one

620
00:23:29,425 --> 00:23:30,426
tomorrow, okay?

621
00:23:32,895 --> 00:23:37,633
Cravensworth...!

622
00:23:37,666 --> 00:23:40,636
♪ Born to travel ♪

623
00:23:40,669 --> 00:23:44,640
♪ Far and wide ♪

624
00:23:44,673 --> 00:23:49,712
♪ It's not the life fit
for a bride ♪

625
00:23:49,746 --> 00:23:52,481
♪ 'Cause he's a traveling man ♪

626
00:23:52,514 --> 00:23:54,851
Since then, I've found out
there's an indie band

627
00:23:54,884 --> 00:23:56,753
also called Jackie Daytona

628
00:23:56,786 --> 00:23:58,687
operating in Texas.

629
00:23:58,721 --> 00:24:00,089
I listened to their music,

630
00:24:00,122 --> 00:24:02,558
and I'm pretty confident
there's no conflict.

631
00:24:02,591 --> 00:24:04,226
And I have to say this,

632
00:24:04,260 --> 00:24:07,229
'cause someone called
Mark from Clearance told me to.

633
00:24:09,031 --> 00:24:13,936
♪ There's lots of places
to see that's new ♪

634
00:24:13,970 --> 00:24:18,174
♪ When you're a traveling man ♪

635
00:24:18,207 --> 00:24:21,210
♪ Traveling man ♪

636
00:24:21,243 --> 00:24:23,212
♪ Whoa, a traveling man. ♪