1 00:00:02,306 --> 00:00:03,866 So you're the only new kid. Big deal, right? 2 00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:06,274 You are gonna crush first grade, Soph. 3 00:00:06,397 --> 00:00:10,137 Thanks, Dad. A-A-And in case you doget nervous, 4 00:00:10,271 --> 00:00:12,191 I got you something special. 5 00:00:12,316 --> 00:00:14,276 A magical amulet. 6 00:00:14,405 --> 00:00:16,965 Nothing bad can happen to you when you got this guy on. 7 00:00:17,104 --> 00:00:20,284 [wizard voice] Careful! Ooh, don't let the magic out! 8 00:00:20,411 --> 00:00:22,151 [gasps] 9 00:00:22,283 --> 00:00:24,893 Did you make this out of Post-its? 10 00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,325 No! 11 00:00:27,375 --> 00:00:29,545 Yes. It's gonna be way worse for me 12 00:00:29,681 --> 00:00:31,551 if I'm wearing sticky notes around my neck. 13 00:00:31,683 --> 00:00:33,253 I'm good on my own. 14 00:00:33,381 --> 00:00:35,341 [normal voice] You're good on your own? 15 00:00:35,470 --> 00:00:38,040 Yeah. See you at pickup. 16 00:00:38,168 --> 00:00:39,128 Okay. 17 00:00:39,256 --> 00:00:41,346 Bye. [smooches] 18 00:00:42,390 --> 00:00:47,000 WILL [SOFTLY]: ♪ I've been staring at the edge of the water ♪ 19 00:00:47,134 --> 00:00:50,094 ♪ Long as I can remember 20 00:00:50,224 --> 00:00:52,924 ♪ Never really knowing why, cha cha cha cha cha ♪ 21 00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,143 Are you whisper-singing "Moana" at me? 22 00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:57,192 Well, yeah, 'cause it always calms you down. 23 00:00:58,362 --> 00:00:59,932 But not now. Bad timing. 24 00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:01,190 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on. 25 00:01:01,322 --> 00:01:03,152 Read the room, right? Okay, you got this. 26 00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:04,110 Bye, I love you. -Bye. 27 00:01:04,238 --> 00:01:06,108 -It's gonna be fun. -What if I miss you? 28 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:07,330 Look, buddy, we talked about this. 29 00:01:07,458 --> 00:01:09,768 It's only six hours. You're gonna do great. 30 00:01:09,895 --> 00:01:11,245 Can I have your scarf? 31 00:01:11,375 --> 00:01:13,245 Graham, we're not doing the scarf thing. 32 00:01:13,377 --> 00:01:15,807 Please. It helps when I have something of yours to sniff. 33 00:01:15,945 --> 00:01:19,115 Look, I don't want you sitting at your desk during recess sniffing my stuff. 34 00:01:20,863 --> 00:01:24,083 Okay, fine, but you're gonna eat vegetables tonight, 35 00:01:24,214 --> 00:01:25,094 the green bummer ones. 36 00:01:25,215 --> 00:01:27,215 [sniffs deeply] Mmm. 37 00:01:27,348 --> 00:01:29,608 Like coconuts and safety. 38 00:01:29,741 --> 00:01:31,741 Mom? I'm regretting the purple. 39 00:01:31,874 --> 00:01:33,754 I should have dressed like a normal kid. 40 00:01:33,876 --> 00:01:35,966 Hey. What's the one thing you always have to be? 41 00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:37,136 -Myself? -And who are you? 42 00:01:37,271 --> 00:01:39,191 Honestly, Mom, I don't even know right now. 43 00:01:39,316 --> 00:01:41,966 Hey, you are a smart, stylish young man 44 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:44,802 who could pull off jewel tones better than anyone I know. 45 00:01:44,930 --> 00:01:46,580 And you can cut a rug. 46 00:01:46,715 --> 00:01:47,975 Okay. 47 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:49,458 Today, I am a grape! 48 00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:52,197 You heard him. My kid's living his truth. 49 00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:54,289 Dad, you forgot our lunch boxes. 50 00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:56,288 Okay, tell you what. 51 00:01:56,420 --> 00:01:59,640 Take 20 bucks and buy yourself a burger from the grill, huh? 52 00:01:59,771 --> 00:02:01,901 Dad, this isn't the club. There's no grill. 53 00:02:02,034 --> 00:02:04,254 Right. Here, sweetheart. Get yourself some crap 54 00:02:04,385 --> 00:02:06,425 with a rainbow on it. My kid's taking your lunch. 55 00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:09,001 Hey!No one ever packed me snacks. Make it work. 56 00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:11,089 Dad, you can't call girls "sweetheart." 57 00:02:11,218 --> 00:02:12,178 It's not empowering. 58 00:02:12,306 --> 00:02:14,256 Okay, let me tell you what isempowering -- 59 00:02:14,395 --> 00:02:15,395 fending for yourself. 60 00:02:15,526 --> 00:02:18,266 Kids today, they're treated like morons. 61 00:02:18,399 --> 00:02:19,139 But not you two. 62 00:02:19,269 --> 00:02:21,139 I would share a foxhole with both of you, 63 00:02:21,271 --> 00:02:23,271 and that is the highest compliment I can give you. 64 00:02:23,404 --> 00:02:25,284 All right, hit me with the family motto. 65 00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:27,446 No weakness.Drain the swamp. 66 00:02:27,582 --> 00:02:28,632 [all exhale sharply] 67 00:02:28,757 --> 00:02:30,277 Excuse me. Sir? Are you supposed to be here? 68 00:02:30,411 --> 00:02:32,671 Do you have a child in this class? 69 00:02:32,804 --> 00:02:34,684 Oh, uh, he's my neighbor. 70 00:02:34,806 --> 00:02:37,456 He's 20, and he's raising a baby alone. 71 00:02:37,592 --> 00:02:38,642 He hasn't fully accepted 72 00:02:38,767 --> 00:02:40,157 that his life has changed forever, you know? 73 00:02:40,290 --> 00:02:42,290 Yeah, um, I'm not running a support group. 74 00:02:42,423 --> 00:02:44,473 You're a little mean. I like it. 75 00:02:44,599 --> 00:02:46,249 [Jack cries]Where am I? 76 00:02:46,383 --> 00:02:48,823 Oh, I had the strangest dream. 77 00:02:48,951 --> 00:02:50,131 [Jack cooing] 78 00:02:51,606 --> 00:02:52,476 Oh. 79 00:02:52,607 --> 00:02:54,437 Sir, I'm gonna ask you to leave. 80 00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:55,645 He goes where we go. 81 00:02:55,784 --> 00:02:57,874 Here you go. Get yourself something nice. 82 00:02:58,003 --> 00:02:59,273 I can't accept tips. 83 00:02:59,396 --> 00:03:02,046 Okay. It, uh, "dropped on the floor." 84 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:03,232 [Ringing] 85 00:03:03,357 --> 00:03:05,917 Attention! Excuse me! 86 00:03:06,055 --> 00:03:08,405 Hello, hi! Quiet coyotes. 87 00:03:08,536 --> 00:03:10,756 Quiet coyotes. Thank you. 88 00:03:10,886 --> 00:03:12,536 My name is Will Cooper, 89 00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:16,150 and I have the honor of being your Room Parent. 90 00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:17,943 -Nice. -That's exciting. 91 00:03:18,067 --> 00:03:19,237 -Oh, no. -Ooh, this is bad. 92 00:03:19,373 --> 00:03:21,943 Is he wearing a necklace made of garbage? 93 00:03:22,071 --> 00:03:24,291 Uh, Sophie and I are new to the school, 94 00:03:24,421 --> 00:03:25,941 and we are so looking forward 95 00:03:26,075 --> 00:03:28,205 to getting to know every one of you. 96 00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:30,908 I am single. 97 00:03:31,036 --> 00:03:31,946 Um... 98 00:03:32,081 --> 00:03:33,341 Always try to get that out there. 99 00:03:33,474 --> 00:03:35,354 Just never quite sure how to work it in. 100 00:03:35,476 --> 00:03:37,696 But that just means I have more time 101 00:03:37,826 --> 00:03:40,256 for creating a little hot lunch option I call... 102 00:03:40,394 --> 00:03:42,404 [Oprah-style singsong voice] ..."Taco Tuesday," y'all! 103 00:03:42,526 --> 00:03:44,136 [Applause][Normal voice] Right? 104 00:03:44,267 --> 00:03:45,307 Did he just "Oprah" that? 105 00:03:45,442 --> 00:03:46,312 He know he's white, right? 106 00:03:46,443 --> 00:03:47,443 Everybody knows. 107 00:03:47,575 --> 00:03:48,915 Come on! Give me fives! All right! 108 00:03:49,054 --> 00:03:50,324 Somebody tell me when it's safe 109 00:03:50,447 --> 00:03:52,227 for my nuts to return to my body. 110 00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:53,542 Now, I see a lot of you are wondering, 111 00:03:53,668 --> 00:03:55,448 "Where do I fit into the equation?" 112 00:03:55,583 --> 00:04:00,763 Five words -- "One hundred percent parent participation." 113 00:04:00,892 --> 00:04:02,502 He's got to be kidding.[Murmuring] 114 00:04:02,633 --> 00:04:04,293 -I am not kidding. -Not happening. 115 00:04:04,418 --> 00:04:06,768 I'm gonna be standing right outside that door 116 00:04:06,898 --> 00:04:08,768 with this sign-up sheet, okay? 117 00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:11,380 This is what's become of the American male. 118 00:04:11,512 --> 00:04:12,952 We used to make things. 119 00:04:13,078 --> 00:04:15,298 Empathy, Douglas. He's single. We're single. 120 00:04:15,429 --> 00:04:17,169 No, I've never been thatsingle. 121 00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:18,610 Do not try to avoid me, 122 00:04:18,736 --> 00:04:21,166 'cause I will hunt you down and circle you like a shark. 123 00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:22,264 [imitating shark][children gasp] 124 00:04:22,392 --> 00:04:27,532 ♪♪ 125 00:04:27,658 --> 00:04:29,358 Okay, guys, we need to talk babysitting. 126 00:04:29,486 --> 00:04:30,526 I'll need help Thursday because 127 00:04:30,661 --> 00:04:32,401 all the paralegals are going out to karaoke. 128 00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:34,583 Just kidding. We're staying late to file. 129 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:35,749 On Thursday, I'm busy. 130 00:04:35,884 --> 00:04:37,194 I got to 'Gram my new Yeezys. 131 00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:39,450 You're a ridiculous person.Thanks, man! 132 00:04:39,583 --> 00:04:40,583 Well, at least he doesn't eat steak 133 00:04:40,715 --> 00:04:42,625 with the same pasty old white guys night after night. 134 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:44,460 We're not pasty old white guys. 135 00:04:44,588 --> 00:04:45,418 We're dermatologists 136 00:04:45,546 --> 00:04:47,546 saving the lives of pasty old white guys. 137 00:04:47,678 --> 00:04:49,588 Hey, guys, I need some help. 138 00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,604 Found this in Graham's backpack. 139 00:04:51,726 --> 00:04:53,376 Aww, Graham wrote a love letter. 140 00:04:53,510 --> 00:04:54,600 Aww. 141 00:04:54,729 --> 00:04:55,639 -Oh, no, to Zoe? -Yes. 142 00:04:55,773 --> 00:04:57,043 That girl who always wears bunny ears? 143 00:04:57,166 --> 00:04:58,466 -She's crazy. -She runs the school. 144 00:04:58,602 --> 00:04:59,562 And if she breaks Graham's heart, 145 00:04:59,690 --> 00:05:02,040 I will chop off her feet and turn them into keychains. 146 00:05:02,171 --> 00:05:03,781 -Huh? -Just kidding. 147 00:05:03,912 --> 00:05:05,572 But I'll be really mad.[indistinct talking in distance] 148 00:05:05,696 --> 00:05:07,086 Oh, God, the new guy. 149 00:05:07,219 --> 00:05:09,439 ...field trips? Actually, are you insured drivers? 150 00:05:09,570 --> 00:05:11,490 We have got to deal with him. 151 00:05:11,615 --> 00:05:14,045 But I have no time to be handing out tacos all year.No. 152 00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:15,533 Word.I'm still in awe of how you did away 153 00:05:15,663 --> 00:05:17,403 with last year's Room Parent. 154 00:05:17,534 --> 00:05:19,414 You wiped all trace of us from that phone tree. It's kind of my thing. 155 00:05:19,536 --> 00:05:21,836 Parents! Will Cooper! 156 00:05:21,973 --> 00:05:23,503 I just wanted to, uh, circle back 157 00:05:23,627 --> 00:05:25,887 and see where we are vis-à-vis committees. 158 00:05:26,021 --> 00:05:27,461 You know what? Let me say it plain -- 159 00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:29,548 we're not gonna do anything you want us to do. 160 00:05:29,677 --> 00:05:31,027 No, man. We're single parents. 161 00:05:31,156 --> 00:05:32,976 We don't volunteer. We just try and survive 162 00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:35,505 until a time in the day when it's appropriate to open wine. 163 00:05:35,639 --> 00:05:37,859 I don't know if you heard my announcement, but I'm single, as well. 164 00:05:37,989 --> 00:05:39,299 -We heard. -We -- We heard. -We heard, bro. 165 00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:41,246 So I have no wiggle room on parent participation. 166 00:05:41,384 --> 00:05:43,564 You're in deep, aren't you? 167 00:05:43,691 --> 00:05:45,301 Deep in what? 168 00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:46,822 The vortex. 169 00:05:46,955 --> 00:05:49,435 That place where you're so wrapped up in your kid 170 00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:51,606 that you've lost all touch with your adult life 171 00:05:51,742 --> 00:05:53,272 and the person you used to be. 172 00:05:53,396 --> 00:05:56,826 I know, 'cause I've been there. 173 00:05:56,965 --> 00:05:59,445 ♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪[baby crying] 174 00:05:59,576 --> 00:06:01,926 ♪ Round and round, round and round ♪ 175 00:06:02,057 --> 00:06:04,837 ♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪ 176 00:06:04,973 --> 00:06:05,803 [thud] 177 00:06:05,930 --> 00:06:07,370 It happens to all of us. 178 00:06:07,497 --> 00:06:08,847 But [chuckles] I don't think I'm in a vortex. 179 00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:12,147 Will, when was the last time you stayed up past 10:00? 180 00:06:12,284 --> 00:06:13,374 In the nighttime? 181 00:06:13,503 --> 00:06:14,943 Okay, when's the last time you made love? 182 00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:15,940 [laughing] Oh, my... 183 00:06:16,071 --> 00:06:17,511 It's okay. There's no judgment here. 184 00:06:17,638 --> 00:06:18,938 This is a safe space. 185 00:06:19,074 --> 00:06:20,734 For real.Yeah, just tell us. Just ballpark. 186 00:06:20,858 --> 00:06:24,038 All right, ballpark... 187 00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:26,516 give or take a month, it's been about... 188 00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:27,867 five years. 189 00:06:27,996 --> 00:06:29,166 -Oh, baby, no. -Whoo! 190 00:06:29,301 --> 00:06:30,171 [indistinct shouting] 191 00:06:30,302 --> 00:06:31,352 -Dang! -Oh, my God. 192 00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:33,038 You guys said that this was a safe space. 193 00:06:33,175 --> 00:06:34,085 Not that safe. 194 00:06:34,219 --> 00:06:36,659 You know, what you need is a date. 195 00:06:36,787 --> 00:06:37,697 Poppy? 196 00:06:37,832 --> 00:06:39,362 There. I made you a Tinder account. 197 00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:41,616 How did you -- Is that my face on Putin's body? 198 00:06:41,749 --> 00:06:42,919 Pushing you into the deep end, Will. 199 00:06:43,054 --> 00:06:44,404 That's how we do this. 200 00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,454 If I'm being honest, the timing's not great. 201 00:06:46,580 --> 00:06:48,150 It's 120 days till Christmas -- 202 00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:50,107 Are you gonna hide behind that sign-up sheet 203 00:06:50,235 --> 00:06:51,585 or am I swiping right? 204 00:06:51,715 --> 00:06:52,925 I've got Room Parent responsibilities -- 205 00:06:53,064 --> 00:06:54,504 Swipe! Swipe!I have no investment either way. 206 00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:57,631 I've never done something like this before, okay?[chanting "Swipe!"] 207 00:06:57,765 --> 00:07:00,505 You know what? Do it. Swipe left! 208 00:07:00,637 --> 00:07:01,937 It's "swipe right." 209 00:07:02,073 --> 00:07:04,423 It's "swipe right," and you just said that. Sorry. 210 00:07:08,645 --> 00:07:10,725 Okay, okay, okay. We got Emma, we got Amy, 211 00:07:10,865 --> 00:07:12,865 we got Rory, we got Graham. Who are you? 212 00:07:12,997 --> 00:07:14,867 Wrong van, kid. Get out of here. Beat it. 213 00:07:14,999 --> 00:07:17,999 Angie! Hey! Will Cooper from yesterday. 214 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:19,573 So, tonight's date night. -Ooh. 215 00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:21,570 Remember, a real man pays for dinner. 216 00:07:21,702 --> 00:07:23,882 Is that true? I mean, I don't know by 2018's standards -- 217 00:07:24,008 --> 00:07:25,528 Will, I say this with an open heart 218 00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,192 and nothing but love -- 219 00:07:27,316 --> 00:07:28,536 you're a disaster. -Preach. 220 00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:30,535 Yeah, I don't know if I'm a disaster. 221 00:07:30,667 --> 00:07:32,537 I mean, yes, I'm experiencing some anxiety, 222 00:07:32,669 --> 00:07:34,189 but that's normal, okay? And I'm just -- 223 00:07:34,323 --> 00:07:35,593 Will. I don't have time for this. 224 00:07:35,716 --> 00:07:36,926 -Oh. -We got you the date, 225 00:07:37,065 --> 00:07:38,805 and now I have to babysit everyone else's kids 226 00:07:38,936 --> 00:07:40,976 so I can have a Saturday night to drink champagne out of a can 227 00:07:41,112 --> 00:07:42,722 and watch a bird documentary. 228 00:07:42,853 --> 00:07:44,333 Okay, 'cause I was actually coming over to say 229 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:45,424 I could babysit today if you wa-- 230 00:07:45,552 --> 00:07:47,952 -We'll be there in 15 minutes. -Oh, cool. 231 00:07:48,076 --> 00:07:49,026 ♪ That's right DIEGO: Yo, why did 232 00:07:49,164 --> 00:07:50,564 you bring your baby to the sneaker line? 233 00:07:50,687 --> 00:07:52,687 'Cause free babysitting doesn't just fall out of the sky. 234 00:07:52,820 --> 00:07:54,430 [scoffs][cellphone chimes] 235 00:07:54,561 --> 00:07:56,391 Oh, snap! Free babysitting! 236 00:07:56,519 --> 00:07:57,779 All right, yo, hey. Be right back. 237 00:07:57,912 --> 00:07:58,832 Wait -- Okay. 238 00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,176 I -- Imma come back. Hold my spot. 239 00:08:00,305 --> 00:08:01,735 I -- I'll be back without the baby. Just me. 240 00:08:01,872 --> 00:08:02,962 Hold my spot! 241 00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:04,351 ♪♪ 242 00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:06,624 [doorbell rings]Welcome, dudes! Will Cooper! 243 00:08:06,747 --> 00:08:08,707 Do you guys want to go play in my room? 244 00:08:08,836 --> 00:08:10,486 The theme is "tasteful unicorn." 245 00:08:10,620 --> 00:08:13,010 Thanks a lot. We'll be back in a few. Good God. 246 00:08:13,144 --> 00:08:15,634 -This place is a wonderland. -Every chair is a beanbag. 247 00:08:15,756 --> 00:08:18,056 There's no chair that isn't a beanbag. 248 00:08:18,193 --> 00:08:20,673 All chairs currently have beans. 249 00:08:20,804 --> 00:08:21,764 Indoor trampoline? 250 00:08:21,892 --> 00:08:23,462 So they can bounce when it's raining. 251 00:08:23,590 --> 00:08:25,720 [door closes]Will, sit down. 252 00:08:26,593 --> 00:08:28,163 [thud] 253 00:08:28,290 --> 00:08:30,640 What are you gonna wear on your date tonight? 254 00:08:30,771 --> 00:08:32,031 -This? -Oh, God. 255 00:08:32,163 --> 00:08:33,643 [chuckles] Oh, you're serious. 256 00:08:33,774 --> 00:08:34,784 Or -- Or... 257 00:08:34,905 --> 00:08:37,165 [Zipping]...I do have another option. 258 00:08:37,299 --> 00:08:38,429 Ah! 259 00:08:38,561 --> 00:08:39,611 Shorts![Jack cries] 260 00:08:39,736 --> 00:08:41,516 Y-Your pants are making my baby cry, man! 261 00:08:41,651 --> 00:08:43,521 Make it stop. Make it all stop. 262 00:08:43,653 --> 00:08:45,223 Here. Oh. I know. I know. 263 00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:47,830 Rock, squat, pause. 264 00:08:47,962 --> 00:08:49,492 Rock, squat, pause. 265 00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:50,616 [crying stops]Oh. There we go. 266 00:08:50,747 --> 00:08:53,267 Oh, my God. What did you do? 267 00:08:53,402 --> 00:08:54,402 It's a little something I call 268 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,194 rock, squat, pause. 269 00:08:56,318 --> 00:08:57,318 -"Puss"? -No. 270 00:08:57,449 --> 00:08:58,279 -"Puzz." -Rock, squat -- 271 00:08:58,407 --> 00:09:00,537 Listen -- rock, squat, pause. 272 00:09:00,670 --> 00:09:02,450 -Puh... -"Pause." "Pause." 273 00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:03,325 Oh, "pause"! 274 00:09:03,455 --> 00:09:04,275 Say it with me. Ro-- 275 00:09:04,413 --> 00:09:05,853 -Never. -Nah, man. 276 00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:07,020 What if I learn to do that 277 00:09:07,155 --> 00:09:08,765 and then Ihaven't had sex in five years 278 00:09:08,896 --> 00:09:11,026 and I'm wearing pants that zip off into shorts? 279 00:09:11,159 --> 00:09:13,029 Give me my baby.[Jack coos] 280 00:09:13,161 --> 00:09:14,601 Ah, you guys, you're right. 281 00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:16,688 I-I -- I'm clearly not ready, okay? 282 00:09:16,817 --> 00:09:18,727 I-I say we put the brakes on the date tonight, 283 00:09:18,862 --> 00:09:20,602 okay, just until after Taco Tuesday's figured out. 284 00:09:20,734 --> 00:09:23,264 I want to keep that guac from browning -- 285 00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:24,558 No. No. Focus. 286 00:09:24,694 --> 00:09:26,834 There's honestly a lot of fear that's creeping in. 287 00:09:26,957 --> 00:09:28,567 -Take a deep breath. -[exhales sharply] 288 00:09:28,698 --> 00:09:29,738 You're going on this date. 289 00:09:29,873 --> 00:09:31,833 [unsure] Good. I'm excited about that. 290 00:09:31,962 --> 00:09:33,362 DOUGLAS: Hey, so just making sure, 291 00:09:33,485 --> 00:09:35,525 you're gonna be taking Emma and Amy tonight? 292 00:09:35,662 --> 00:09:38,322 Because I'm getting together with my dermatologist pals. 293 00:09:38,447 --> 00:09:40,137 Oh, Rory wanted me to ask you to come 294 00:09:40,275 --> 00:09:42,095 to his dance party tonight. 295 00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:43,933 Aww, what a sweetheart. Pass. 296 00:09:44,061 --> 00:09:45,851 I told you, he's going through a thing. 297 00:09:45,976 --> 00:09:48,146 He won't even wear his favorite leotard to school 298 00:09:48,283 --> 00:09:49,943 'cause he's scared other kids will make fun of him. 299 00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:51,457 Well, of course they're gonna make fun of him. 300 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:52,681 When I was a boy, 301 00:09:52,809 --> 00:09:54,859 I got beaten up for smiling at a basketball game. 302 00:09:54,985 --> 00:09:56,325 All right, look. I don't know why, 303 00:09:56,465 --> 00:09:57,375 but my kid likes you. 304 00:09:57,509 --> 00:09:59,079 Okay? And in case you haven't noticed, 305 00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:00,637 he doesn't have another man in his life, 306 00:10:00,774 --> 00:10:02,784 so why don't you just show up for him? 307 00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:05,816 I don't dance, okay, especially with guys. 308 00:10:05,953 --> 00:10:08,523 You know, I still can't wrap my head around this place. 309 00:10:08,651 --> 00:10:10,741 Why does every book have to be on yoga and menopause? 310 00:10:10,871 --> 00:10:14,791 Douglas... you are why we march. 311 00:10:14,918 --> 00:10:16,488 Oh, God. 312 00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:17,916 Yo, why do we have to do this again? 313 00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:20,842 I just don't want to send him out into the world like this. 314 00:10:20,968 --> 00:10:22,528 I mean, it would be a crime. 315 00:10:22,665 --> 00:10:24,145 It's like leaving a baby on a doorstep 316 00:10:24,275 --> 00:10:25,625 and hoping for the best. 317 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:28,757 Miggy. Hmm? 318 00:10:28,889 --> 00:10:29,669 You can't actually do that. 319 00:10:29,803 --> 00:10:31,763 -[scoffs] I knew that. -Just checking. 320 00:10:31,892 --> 00:10:33,942 I just don't want him to bomb his date 321 00:10:34,068 --> 00:10:36,768 and start harassing us again about hot lunch. 322 00:10:36,897 --> 00:10:39,677 This is the third pair of earmuffs I have found. 323 00:10:39,813 --> 00:10:41,773 Who hurt this guy? 324 00:10:41,902 --> 00:10:45,782 "Zoe, I want to hug you and give you all my gum." 325 00:10:45,906 --> 00:10:47,556 That's a great start. 326 00:10:47,690 --> 00:10:50,740 I've been in love with Zoe since day one of kindergarten. 327 00:10:50,867 --> 00:10:52,607 Then she put those bunny ears on -- 328 00:10:52,739 --> 00:10:54,389 stick a fork in me, I'm done. 329 00:10:54,523 --> 00:10:55,613 -It's your first love. -[slurps] 330 00:10:55,742 --> 00:10:57,132 That's a big deal. It's exciting. 331 00:10:57,265 --> 00:10:59,135 You shouldn't be afraid to let your feelings out. 332 00:10:59,267 --> 00:11:00,177 Exactly. 333 00:11:00,311 --> 00:11:02,401 That's how I want to play it with Zoe. 334 00:11:02,531 --> 00:11:04,791 Raw, open, positive. 335 00:11:04,925 --> 00:11:05,705 Oh, by the way, 336 00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:07,799 don't let my mom scare you about the date tonight. 337 00:11:07,928 --> 00:11:10,318 She doesn't believe in love because... 338 00:11:10,452 --> 00:11:12,192 my dad is kind of a garbage human. 339 00:11:12,323 --> 00:11:14,543 That's good to know. 340 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,984 But I'm gonna cut you off on the juice boxes, 'kay, bud? 341 00:11:17,111 --> 00:11:20,031 Hey, Will? Angie says I have to give you a makeover. 342 00:11:21,028 --> 00:11:23,248 [sighs] This is my Everest. 343 00:11:23,378 --> 00:11:25,818 ANGIE: [in distance] Oh, my God! 344 00:11:25,946 --> 00:11:28,036 ♪♪ 345 00:11:28,165 --> 00:11:29,945 Angie, are you hurt? 346 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:31,600 Why do you have this? 347 00:11:31,734 --> 00:11:32,784 Oh. [scoffs] 348 00:11:32,909 --> 00:11:34,649 Honestly, I've never seen that before in my life. 349 00:11:34,781 --> 00:11:37,701 Dude, your wallet is in here 350 00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:39,997 and a bag of popcorn that's still hot. 351 00:11:40,134 --> 00:11:41,884 You've used this today. 352 00:11:42,005 --> 00:11:43,215 Yeah, I use it for snacks, okay? 353 00:11:43,354 --> 00:11:45,444 Nobody ever tells dads what to do about snacks, 354 00:11:45,574 --> 00:11:47,844 and this is a good snack holder. 355 00:11:47,968 --> 00:11:53,798 It was actually my wife's... before she left. 356 00:11:54,626 --> 00:11:57,846 Oh. I'm sorry. 357 00:11:57,978 --> 00:12:00,848 Do you think that maybe there's a reason -- 358 00:12:00,981 --> 00:12:02,071 I don't know, just throwing it out there -- 359 00:12:02,199 --> 00:12:07,379 that this is the bag she didn'ttake when she left? 360 00:12:07,509 --> 00:12:08,819 [both laugh] 361 00:12:10,642 --> 00:12:12,172 Do you miss her? 362 00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:13,946 No. 363 00:12:14,081 --> 00:12:15,821 But I miss having someone, 364 00:12:15,952 --> 00:12:18,832 and not just for the bad stuff or hard stuff or whatever, 365 00:12:18,955 --> 00:12:20,995 but -- but for all of the good things, 366 00:12:21,131 --> 00:12:23,261 like when she lost her first tooth 367 00:12:23,394 --> 00:12:25,014 and when she told her first joke 368 00:12:25,135 --> 00:12:27,525 and the week she demanded I call her 369 00:12:27,659 --> 00:12:28,969 "Jelly Bean Teen Machine." 370 00:12:29,966 --> 00:12:33,056 Nobody tells you how lonely it can be. 371 00:12:33,187 --> 00:12:37,227 One time, I made a boyfriend out of a pile of laundry... 372 00:12:37,365 --> 00:12:38,755 and I rolled around in him. 373 00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:39,928 [chuckles] 374 00:12:40,063 --> 00:12:41,113 It wasn't built to last. 375 00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:43,628 [both laugh] 376 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:47,243 But when you have kids, something happens to you. 377 00:12:47,375 --> 00:12:48,675 You become mush. Mm. 378 00:12:48,811 --> 00:12:50,731 But you got to hide that. That's what I tell Graham. 379 00:12:50,857 --> 00:12:53,687 Otherwise, that little weirdo's gonna get his heart broken. 380 00:12:53,816 --> 00:12:54,946 I-I honestly don't know 381 00:12:55,078 --> 00:12:57,858 if I'm capable of hiding my mush. 382 00:12:57,994 --> 00:12:59,134 I mean, you guys are lucky. 383 00:12:59,256 --> 00:13:00,906 You have each other to look out for one another, 384 00:13:01,041 --> 00:13:03,741 but it's just me. 385 00:13:03,870 --> 00:13:05,740 Do you ever look at each other and go, 386 00:13:05,872 --> 00:13:08,532 "Ah, it takes a vill--"Don't say it. 387 00:13:08,657 --> 00:13:09,787 Just throw out the bag. 388 00:13:09,919 --> 00:13:12,879 Hey. Did Angie text you her plan? 389 00:13:13,009 --> 00:13:14,579 Yeah, we help him get ready for the date, 390 00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:16,796 and then we never have to volunteer. 391 00:13:16,926 --> 00:13:17,876 Hello, ladies. 392 00:13:18,014 --> 00:13:19,674 -Hi, Dad. -Hey, Dad. 393 00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,839 -Hey, girls. What are you doing? -Will's floor mats. 394 00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:24,365 Would it kill him to shampoo them once in a while? 395 00:13:24,499 --> 00:13:26,499 People don't think that kids can buff and wax, 396 00:13:26,631 --> 00:13:27,851 but they're the perfect height. 397 00:13:27,981 --> 00:13:31,591 Before I can commit to a blazer, ask yourself -- 398 00:13:31,723 --> 00:13:33,163 can this man pull off this vest? 399 00:13:33,290 --> 00:13:34,550 I mean, he doesn't have the arms, 400 00:13:34,683 --> 00:13:36,083 but, you know, he might have the attitude. 401 00:13:36,206 --> 00:13:37,336 -No, no vest. -Vest. 402 00:13:37,468 --> 00:13:39,338 -For the love of God, no vest. -Mm-hmm. Vest. 403 00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:42,820 Maybe this wants to live here, 404 00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:45,562 for tonight's dance party? -I'm seeing it. 405 00:13:45,694 --> 00:13:47,134 -♪ Dance party -Oh, okay, please. 406 00:13:47,261 --> 00:13:49,091 Forget it. We've been trying to get him 407 00:13:49,219 --> 00:13:50,569 to sing and dance for years. 408 00:13:50,699 --> 00:13:52,349 They're right. I-I'm sorry, kid, 409 00:13:52,483 --> 00:13:53,923 but I'm not going to the party. 410 00:13:54,050 --> 00:13:57,400 That's okay. Maybe next time. 411 00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:58,752 [birds chirping] 412 00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:00,101 Nice, Douglas. Real nice. 413 00:14:00,230 --> 00:14:01,800 Rory, I'll wear your vest. -What? 414 00:14:01,928 --> 00:14:03,758 You don't have the right torso for a vest, Mom. 415 00:14:03,886 --> 00:14:05,366 Stop trying to make it happen. 416 00:14:05,496 --> 00:14:06,976 -Ah, I get it, Doug. -Douglas. 417 00:14:07,107 --> 00:14:09,497 Afraid to risk embarrassing yourself, 418 00:14:09,631 --> 00:14:11,071 but that's the greatest part of parenting is, 419 00:14:11,198 --> 00:14:12,898 it gets you out of your comfort zone. 420 00:14:13,026 --> 00:14:15,716 Look, I'm not interested in leaving my comfort zone, 421 00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,325 and I haven't been since my wife died. 422 00:14:17,465 --> 00:14:18,855 Oh, I'm --No, no, I see you want to hug me, 423 00:14:18,988 --> 00:14:20,948 and I'm gonna have to stop you right there. 424 00:14:21,077 --> 00:14:23,077 I can't imagine losing your best friend. 425 00:14:23,210 --> 00:14:25,210 She was a 26-year-old exotic dancer. 426 00:14:25,342 --> 00:14:26,392 She looked great in pants. 427 00:14:26,517 --> 00:14:28,037 Ain't love a funny thing. 428 00:14:28,171 --> 00:14:30,041 Anyway, I said, "Okay, I'll have kids," 429 00:14:30,173 --> 00:14:31,573 thinking I would change one diaper 430 00:14:31,696 --> 00:14:33,956 and get dementia right before they hit their teens. 431 00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:37,050 Instead, she dropped dead and left me with two baby girls. 432 00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:40,230 The point is, I don't need any more surprises. 433 00:14:40,357 --> 00:14:43,927 All right, but it's never too late to try something new. 434 00:14:44,057 --> 00:14:45,577 I think it'd be good for you, Doug. 435 00:14:45,710 --> 00:14:48,060 Douglas. I think it'd be good for your girls. 436 00:14:48,191 --> 00:14:50,191 You don't have to go it alone. 437 00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:51,894 I can be your friend, Doug. 438 00:14:52,021 --> 00:14:53,411 Douglas. It's Douglas. 439 00:14:53,544 --> 00:14:55,204 And I don't need any more friends. 440 00:14:55,329 --> 00:14:57,109 The only reason why any of us are here 441 00:14:57,244 --> 00:14:58,904 is so we can get out of volunteering. 442 00:14:59,028 --> 00:14:59,938 Wait, hold on. 443 00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:02,903 Angie, is that true? 444 00:15:03,032 --> 00:15:04,122 Look... [sighs] 445 00:15:04,251 --> 00:15:06,601 I told you about Jelly Bean Teen Machine. 446 00:15:06,731 --> 00:15:08,861 Wait. We wanted to help you. 447 00:15:08,995 --> 00:15:12,085 I mean, we do now. -No, it's fine, honestly. 448 00:15:12,215 --> 00:15:14,645 We're not friends, which is actually a good thing, 449 00:15:14,783 --> 00:15:17,263 'cause now I can admit I didn't throw away the mermaid bag. 450 00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:21,964 I hid it in the petticoat of Barbie B. Anthony! 451 00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:24,229 DOUGLAS: A man with a mermaid bag. 452 00:15:24,358 --> 00:15:25,268 I blame Obama. 453 00:15:25,402 --> 00:15:27,842 I don't know how to cover up my mush. 454 00:15:27,970 --> 00:15:29,060 But maybe that's not a bad thing. 455 00:15:29,189 --> 00:15:32,149 Maybe you guys could actually use a little bit more mush. 456 00:15:32,279 --> 00:15:34,109 Will, I will hand out tacos. 457 00:15:34,237 --> 00:15:36,277 No. Don't, okay? 458 00:15:36,413 --> 00:15:37,983 It's just disappointing. 459 00:15:38,111 --> 00:15:39,161 I thought I'd finally found 460 00:15:39,286 --> 00:15:41,286 a group that I could share this with. 461 00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:43,198 It takes a vill-- -Don't say it. 462 00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:44,513 It takes a vill-- 463 00:15:44,639 --> 00:15:45,599 -Stop! -No, no. 464 00:15:45,727 --> 00:15:47,207 Well, thanks for getting me a date, 465 00:15:47,337 --> 00:15:48,467 which I now have to go on. 466 00:15:48,599 --> 00:15:52,519 Sophie, I'm taking you to Nana's. 467 00:15:52,647 --> 00:15:54,737 It takes a village. Ha, I did it. 468 00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,697 Dang, girl. I just love you. 469 00:15:59,828 --> 00:16:01,608 I love you, too, honey. 470 00:16:01,743 --> 00:16:03,223 And also you told me five minutes ago. 471 00:16:03,353 --> 00:16:06,443 No, I was reading over an e-mail to Zoe. 472 00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:08,324 I think it's good. Send. 473 00:16:08,445 --> 00:16:09,965 [whoosh]What? You sent? 474 00:16:10,099 --> 00:16:11,669 You got to put yourself out there. 475 00:16:11,796 --> 00:16:15,236 Will gets it. He told me to go for it. 476 00:16:15,365 --> 00:16:17,015 That was a really fun dinner. 477 00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:18,500 I loved when you looked up from your phone. 478 00:16:18,629 --> 00:16:20,459 But it is good that you got to FaceTime with your sister. 479 00:16:20,588 --> 00:16:22,238 You guys worked through so many issues. 480 00:16:22,372 --> 00:16:23,202 [door slams] 481 00:16:23,330 --> 00:16:24,680 Should we make out now? 482 00:16:24,809 --> 00:16:25,719 Gah. 483 00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:26,864 ♪♪ 484 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,856 Mwah. Mwah. Oh, wow, this is happening. 485 00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:30,898 -Take your pants off. -Get these jeans down. 486 00:16:31,033 --> 00:16:33,213 There we go. Okay. 487 00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:34,210 Oh. 488 00:16:34,341 --> 00:16:35,731 Oh, the touch of a woman. 489 00:16:35,864 --> 00:16:38,434 [exhales sharply] I love you. 490 00:16:40,738 --> 00:16:41,778 You what? 491 00:16:41,913 --> 00:16:43,133 [door slams] 492 00:16:43,263 --> 00:16:46,013 Good night. 493 00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:47,655 [sighs] 494 00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:50,745 Oh, my keys. 495 00:16:50,879 --> 00:16:53,929 [knocks on door]Heather, please open the door. Please let me in. 496 00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:56,186 [pounding on door]I need to come into your apartment. 497 00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:57,019 I'm just a dad who says 498 00:16:57,146 --> 00:16:59,146 "I love you" a thousand times a day, 499 00:16:59,279 --> 00:17:01,239 and that's not a bad thing. 500 00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:04,148 Hi, are you in there? I don't love you. 501 00:17:04,284 --> 00:17:06,114 I'm not even sure I like you. 502 00:17:06,242 --> 00:17:07,332 My keys are inside! 503 00:17:07,461 --> 00:17:09,031 [cellphone rings]Heather -- Will Cooper. 504 00:17:09,158 --> 00:17:12,118 How could you tell Graham to put himself out there? 505 00:17:12,248 --> 00:17:15,298 He's gonna get hurt. Wait, why are you answering? 506 00:17:15,425 --> 00:17:17,245 Aren't you supposed to be on a date? 507 00:17:17,384 --> 00:17:18,344 Well, I let out my mush, 508 00:17:18,472 --> 00:17:21,392 and now there's mush all over this lady's apartment, 509 00:17:21,518 --> 00:17:23,388 and my keys are locked inside. 510 00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:24,960 You guys were right. I can't do this. 511 00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:26,607 [siren wails in distance]But maybe that's a good thing, 512 00:17:26,741 --> 00:17:28,311 because I actually like being single. 513 00:17:28,438 --> 00:17:30,138 It's gonna give me more time to figure out 514 00:17:30,266 --> 00:17:31,266 Sophie's Halloween costume. 515 00:17:31,398 --> 00:17:32,308 She's going as a princess, 516 00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:33,972 but I have to find my own spin on that. 517 00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:35,006 Uh, are those sirens? 518 00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:36,101 Yeah, but they're not for me. 519 00:17:36,229 --> 00:17:37,969 -Sir, don't move. -Oh, they arefor me. 520 00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:39,410 Oh -- Oh, my God. Will. Will -- 521 00:17:39,536 --> 00:17:40,796 -Hello, officers. -Will, what's going on? 522 00:17:40,929 --> 00:17:41,839 Will Cooper. 523 00:17:41,973 --> 00:17:43,243 ♪ That's right, hold it down 524 00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:46,106 [Jack coos]Miggy! Emergency! Get in! 525 00:17:46,239 --> 00:17:49,589 Dude, tell your weird parent friends to stay away. 526 00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:51,720 We got to earn respect on the sneaker line. 527 00:17:51,853 --> 00:17:53,163 [Jack coos] 528 00:17:53,289 --> 00:17:55,069 [indistinct conversations] 529 00:17:55,204 --> 00:17:58,774 ♪♪ 530 00:17:58,903 --> 00:18:01,383 So I cut off the skin tag on the green, 531 00:18:01,515 --> 00:18:03,775 and I still managed to make a birdie. 532 00:18:03,908 --> 00:18:05,948 [laughter]Douglas. 533 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:07,085 Will's in trouble. We got to go. 534 00:18:07,216 --> 00:18:09,126 What, I-I --I'm the only babysitter you got, 535 00:18:09,262 --> 00:18:11,532 and I'm not afraid to go on strike. 536 00:18:11,655 --> 00:18:14,135 ♪♪ 537 00:18:14,267 --> 00:18:16,227 My ex, she's in the Sudan. 538 00:18:16,356 --> 00:18:18,226 She's a human-rights lawyer. She's doing great work, 539 00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:19,878 and -- and, you know, I don't fault her for that. 540 00:18:20,011 --> 00:18:23,361 I just -- I-I never imagined raising a child on my own, 541 00:18:23,493 --> 00:18:28,413 and I think part of me still feels like she's coming back. 542 00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:31,682 Dude, she's not coming back. 543 00:18:31,806 --> 00:18:33,846 ♪♪ 544 00:18:33,982 --> 00:18:37,862 We all got left, but we're not alone. 545 00:18:37,986 --> 00:18:39,066 [gate closes] 546 00:18:39,205 --> 00:18:41,205 Officers, let him go. He's not dangerous. 547 00:18:41,337 --> 00:18:42,767 Look at his shoes. He's wearing Keds. 548 00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:44,434 OFFICER: His Keds are not the issue, ma'am. 549 00:18:44,558 --> 00:18:45,648 But they are anissue. 550 00:18:45,776 --> 00:18:47,076 Look, he didn't hurt anyone. 551 00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:48,823 Let's forget about this, officers. 552 00:18:48,953 --> 00:18:50,653 Go ahead. Get yourself something nice. 553 00:18:50,781 --> 00:18:51,781 I know what you make. 554 00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:53,573 Sir, put the money away. You, come with us. 555 00:18:53,697 --> 00:18:55,567 [cellphone ringing]I -- I'm so sorry. 556 00:18:56,570 --> 00:18:58,400 Sophie, hey. 557 00:18:58,528 --> 00:19:04,398 Dad, I know I said I didn't need the song anymore, but... 558 00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:06,884 Of course. 559 00:19:08,364 --> 00:19:13,114 ♪ I've been staring at the edge of the water ♪ 560 00:19:13,239 --> 00:19:15,719 ♪ Long as I can remember 561 00:19:15,850 --> 00:19:20,160 ♪ Never really knowing why 562 00:19:20,289 --> 00:19:25,899 ♪ I wish I could be the perfect daughter ♪ 563 00:19:26,034 --> 00:19:28,474 ♪ But I go back to the water 564 00:19:28,602 --> 00:19:33,132 ♪ No matter how hard I try 565 00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:36,349 BOTH: ♪ See the line where the sky meets the sea ♪ 566 00:19:36,479 --> 00:19:38,439 ♪ It calls me 567 00:19:38,568 --> 00:19:42,088 ♪ And no one knows 568 00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:44,664 ♪ How far it goes 569 00:19:44,792 --> 00:19:46,752 EMMA: I knew it. 570 00:19:46,881 --> 00:19:48,841 -♪ What's beyond that line? Will I cross that line? ♪ -He knows all the words. 571 00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:51,890 -♪ The line where the sky meets the sea ♪ -That beautiful bastard. 572 00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:54,496 WILL: ♪ It calls me 573 00:19:54,628 --> 00:19:57,718 ♪ And no one knows -Rory, would you like to dance? 574 00:19:57,848 --> 00:20:00,938 -♪ How far it goes -The answer is always yes. 575 00:20:01,069 --> 00:20:05,939 -♪ If the wind in my sail on the sea stays behind me ♪ -Hey. 576 00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:08,514 -♪ One day I'll know -You're looking so good, Rory! 577 00:20:08,642 --> 00:20:09,952 ♪ How far I'll go 578 00:20:10,078 --> 00:20:13,388 -Whoo! Go, baby! -Whoo-hoo! 579 00:20:13,516 --> 00:20:15,516 [vocalizing] 580 00:20:15,649 --> 00:20:19,309 What's happening? Who are these people? 581 00:20:21,655 --> 00:20:22,915 They're my village. 582 00:20:23,047 --> 00:20:25,137 -No, boo. -You ruined it. 583 00:20:25,267 --> 00:20:27,227 Dad, you've got to tighten up. 584 00:20:30,446 --> 00:20:32,266 ♪♪ 585 00:20:32,405 --> 00:20:34,705 Mwah. Look at you not asking for a scarf. 586 00:20:34,842 --> 00:20:35,712 Soph. 587 00:20:35,843 --> 00:20:39,113 -TOGETHER: No weakness! -Yes. Ow. 588 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:40,328 Rory. -Douglas. 589 00:20:40,456 --> 00:20:43,286 BOTH: Rock, squat, pause. Rock, squat, pause. 590 00:20:43,416 --> 00:20:45,326 -The -- The pause is a bounce. -Oh, a bounce. 591 00:20:45,461 --> 00:20:48,511 [gasps] Guys. Zoe. She's going for Graham. 592 00:20:48,638 --> 00:20:50,288 Don't let the bunny ears fool you. 593 00:20:50,423 --> 00:20:53,343 She's a cold-blooded killer! -Hey, hey, hey, hang on. 594 00:20:53,469 --> 00:20:54,819 He's got this. 595 00:20:54,949 --> 00:20:56,689 I got your e-mail. 596 00:20:57,952 --> 00:21:00,432 It shook me to my core. 597 00:21:00,563 --> 00:21:04,443 ♪♪ 598 00:21:04,567 --> 00:21:08,397 ♪♪ 599 00:21:08,528 --> 00:21:09,748 She likes him. 600 00:21:09,877 --> 00:21:13,447 [gasps] That Easter freak likes my kid! 601 00:21:13,576 --> 00:21:16,796 Aww, and they're sharing gum. That's huge. 602 00:21:16,927 --> 00:21:18,057 It's gross. -It is gross. 603 00:21:18,189 --> 00:21:19,409 But it's -- it's huge. 604 00:21:19,539 --> 00:21:22,279 I told you. Mush works. 605 00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,851 And from now on, I will eat at restaurants 606 00:21:24,979 --> 00:21:26,369 that don't give out crayons. -Whoo! 607 00:21:26,502 --> 00:21:27,552 -Yeah! -I'm gonna maybe 608 00:21:27,677 --> 00:21:30,457 start drinking coffee after 4:00 p.m. 609 00:21:30,593 --> 00:21:31,423 -Whoo! -Sounds fine. 610 00:21:31,551 --> 00:21:33,731 I am out of the vortex! 611 00:21:33,857 --> 00:21:35,417 -Yeah! -Yeah! 612 00:21:35,555 --> 00:21:36,505 Okay. 613 00:21:36,643 --> 00:21:38,253 Don't go up the slide. 614 00:21:38,384 --> 00:21:40,214 -♪ Oh, baby, please -He's a long way from sex. 615 00:21:40,342 --> 00:21:42,082 I am out of the vortex! 616 00:21:42,213 --> 00:21:44,743 -♪ Give a little respect -I watched a guy get crushed by a forklift, 617 00:21:44,868 --> 00:21:46,438 but this is worse. -Word. 618 00:21:46,566 --> 00:21:48,256 Third time's the charm. 619 00:21:48,394 --> 00:21:49,224 [grunts] 620 00:21:49,351 --> 00:21:52,221 ♪ To me 621 00:21:53,442 --> 00:21:55,312 I'm out of the vortex!