1 00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:16,555 [theme music playing] 2 00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:36,081 -[crowd cheering, clapping] -[David Letterman] Thank you. 3 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:41,752 Thank you. Okay. 4 00:00:41,833 --> 00:00:43,963 [cheering, clapping continues] 5 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:45,134 Thank you very much. 6 00:00:45,795 --> 00:00:49,165 If you're in my position, and you come out, 7 00:00:49,257 --> 00:00:52,297 and you see people, and they're responding, 8 00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:53,925 even if it's artificial, 9 00:00:54,012 --> 00:00:54,972 even if it's… 10 00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:55,925 [laughing] 11 00:00:56,014 --> 00:00:57,774 …even if it's artificially provoked, 12 00:00:57,849 --> 00:00:58,889 the thrill… 13 00:00:58,975 --> 00:01:00,225 [laughing] 14 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:03,860 ...that runs up my spine is indescribable. 15 00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:06,688 [whistling, cheering, clapping] 16 00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:08,572 Thank you. Hi, how are you? 17 00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:12,566 Here we go, ladies and gentlemen. I'm very excited about this. 18 00:01:12,655 --> 00:01:15,445 It's gonna be fun, and you'll be home in time-- 19 00:01:15,533 --> 00:01:17,333 I don't know. Whatever you're gonna do at home. 20 00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:18,580 [crowd laughing] 21 00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:23,501 Do me a favor, please welcome two-time Academy Award nominee, 22 00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:27,924 Mr. Box Office, Robert Downey Jr. 23 00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:30,674 [cheering, clapping, whooping] 24 00:01:36,721 --> 00:01:38,681 Hey! Robert, nice to see you. 25 00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:40,515 -Been a long time. -Nice seeing you. 26 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:42,020 -Thank you very much. -Pleasure. 27 00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:43,812 [cheering, clapping continues] 28 00:01:45,730 --> 00:01:47,070 [whistling] 29 00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:51,315 Yeah. 30 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:01,041 -How are you? -Great. 31 00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:03,997 Ah… 32 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:05,672 Nice. Isn't it nice? 33 00:02:05,750 --> 00:02:07,630 [cheering, whistling] 34 00:02:07,710 --> 00:02:11,420 Thank you very much for your generosity. Thank you very much for being here. 35 00:02:11,506 --> 00:02:12,336 Yeah. 36 00:02:12,423 --> 00:02:15,683 And you know how this goes. I will ask you questions. 37 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:18,010 You can answer them. You don't have to answer them. 38 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,136 Uh, and I'll do most of the talking. 39 00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:22,603 -Just because that's the way I am. -Great. 40 00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:25,814 Uh, and I wanna start with something personal. 41 00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,396 I thought I had to have hip replacement surgery 42 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:29,571 because it's all the thing. 43 00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:32,689 -Everybody's getting something replaced. -Yeah. Yes, sir. 44 00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:36,317 So, I went to the orthopedist, and she said, "No, no, no, no, no." 45 00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:37,566 Are you paying attention? 46 00:02:37,657 --> 00:02:38,697 -Yeah. -Okay. 47 00:02:38,783 --> 00:02:40,743 -[crowd laughing] -Hold on a goddamn second. 48 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:43,197 Do you mind if I take one second for myself, 49 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:46,328 and make sure that this little look is okay here? 50 00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:48,543 I know you're on a roll. You warmed them up. 51 00:02:48,626 --> 00:02:50,916 -It's your night, baby. I'm just here. -I'm sorry. 52 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:53,054 -Go ahead. -That was rude of me. 53 00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:54,761 -Not now, we'll get there. -Okay. 54 00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:55,681 So… 55 00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:56,838 [crowd laughing] 56 00:02:56,926 --> 00:03:00,466 …she says, "No, you don't need the hip replacement surgery." 57 00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:02,515 "You got a thing that's torqued." 58 00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:05,769 "There's some kind of muscle that runs from here up here." 59 00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:08,062 -Yeah. -So, I thought, "Great." 60 00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:13,146 Because if you can avoid replacing major joints, 61 00:03:13,234 --> 00:03:14,694 you should avoid that. 62 00:03:14,777 --> 00:03:16,147 [crowd chuckling] 63 00:03:16,237 --> 00:03:17,657 So, I'm reading about you, 64 00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:20,739 and I come across a martial arts discipline, 65 00:03:20,825 --> 00:03:24,155 and I believe your discipline is Wing Chun. 66 00:03:24,245 --> 00:03:25,365 -That is correct. -Yes. 67 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:28,165 Now, given my problem… 68 00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:29,999 -Yeah. -What do you think? 69 00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:32,745 [audience laughing] 70 00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:40,465 You know, you try to anticipate what a starter question might be… 71 00:03:40,553 --> 00:03:42,353 [laughing] 72 00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:44,140 …and then there's Dave Letterman. 73 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,064 Yeah. 74 00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:46,772 I, uh… 75 00:03:46,851 --> 00:03:50,941 -Martial arts is good for everything. -Mm-hm. 76 00:03:51,022 --> 00:03:55,612 I would encourage you because it's a rather yin form, so it's not jujitsu, 77 00:03:55,693 --> 00:03:58,863 where it would be arm-barring each other and choking each other out. 78 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:01,317 And this T-band or this whole area here, 79 00:04:01,407 --> 00:04:03,447 and all th-- the, uh, the hip. 80 00:04:03,534 --> 00:04:05,874 Do you feel, uh, restricted in your hip movement? 81 00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:07,044 No, that's the funny thing. 82 00:04:07,121 --> 00:04:11,131 I can run and do everything, which isn't much, that I used to be able to do-- 83 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:13,709 But they tell you it's, like, turning to powder, and you gotta-- 84 00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:15,045 -It's a problem. -They just say-- 85 00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:17,879 They gave me a sheet of illustrated stretches. 86 00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:20,296 Now, you know, how long is that gonna last? 87 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:23,925 Yeah. I mean, you can do some stretches, or you can come fight. 88 00:04:24,013 --> 00:04:25,433 As long as you're doing something. 89 00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:26,595 -Yeah, but… -Yeah. 90 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:29,193 Let me go get my tools. Let me take a look at this. 91 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,439 -[Letterman laughs] -[audience laughing] 92 00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:33,311 I'm so happy you're here, 93 00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:36,438 and I know a lot about you now. 94 00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:39,316 And the more I know about you, the better I like you. 95 00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:41,614 -Aw. [chuckles] -Yeah. And, uh… 96 00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:44,028 I'll tell you, when I first came to California, 97 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,367 I knew of your father, 98 00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:47,621 and I don't think it was entirely accurate, 99 00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:49,084 but I felt and knew 100 00:04:49,163 --> 00:04:54,633 that he was kind of an erudite, esoteric filmmaker. 101 00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:55,631 Now, that's… 102 00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:58,302 That's not entirely apt is it? 103 00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:02,053 Uh, I mean, that's a glowing report, yes. 104 00:05:02,635 --> 00:05:06,755 Yeah, and he was, you know, kind of a counterculture filmmaker… 105 00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:11,727 from New York, and then we wound up out here for a while, and back and forth. 106 00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:12,651 -Right. -Yeah. 107 00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:15,939 And the-- Is it Greaser's Palace? 108 00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:17,194 -Greaser's Palace. -Yes. 109 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:19,685 And is that the best known of his works? 110 00:05:19,777 --> 00:05:22,607 Uh, there's a film he did in 1968 called Putney Swope. 111 00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:26,197 -Oh, Putney Swope, sure. -[Robert] Which is probably a seminal one. 112 00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:27,914 Greaser's Palace is one of my favorites. 113 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:31,464 There's another one called Two Tons of Turquoise to Taos Tonight, 114 00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:33,249 which I like very much. 115 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,003 -That's lovely. -Yeah, it's a good one. 116 00:05:35,084 --> 00:05:38,054 But Chafed Elbows, Babo 73, No More Excuses. 117 00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:39,089 A lot of, uh-- 118 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,922 The people like, you know, Paul Thomas Anderson, 119 00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:45,008 or the people who are big Downey Sr. fans, 120 00:05:45,511 --> 00:05:47,811 or my good friend Anthony Michael Hall… 121 00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:51,099 Like, we quote stuff from my dad's movies all the time. 122 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:54,484 And you were in several of these? Was one of those deals where, like, 123 00:05:54,562 --> 00:05:56,272 "We need a kid. Oh, what about Robert?" 124 00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,106 -Was it kind of like that? -A hundred percent. 125 00:05:58,191 --> 00:05:59,731 It was more like, "We need a kid"-- 126 00:05:59,817 --> 00:06:03,147 I think even in independent movies, there's child labor laws… 127 00:06:03,237 --> 00:06:04,197 Mm-hm. 128 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,820 …but with me, it's like, "It's my kid. He'll do what I tell him." 129 00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:08,788 "He'll go to bed later." So, that was… 130 00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:12,868 [laughing] And was it fun? Was it like what we just did at the house? 131 00:06:12,955 --> 00:06:17,745 It felt very natural, and, also, it's part of the family dynamic, 132 00:06:17,835 --> 00:06:21,455 and like anything else, you learn-- You start kind of learning about life 133 00:06:21,547 --> 00:06:23,587 through the lens of the stuff that your parents do. 134 00:06:23,674 --> 00:06:28,304 So, in your time growing up, did you ever think to yourself, 135 00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:31,718 "I'm gonna be-- Uh, I'm gonna go into computer programming. 136 00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:34,308 I'm gonna go into automobile design," 137 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,694 or was it always, "Well, I'm gonna be an actor." 138 00:06:36,771 --> 00:06:38,941 "I might as well. We're doing it here at the house"? 139 00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:40,610 Look at me. 140 00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:41,981 [crowd laughing] 141 00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:44,318 [Letterman chuckling] 142 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:45,914 No, what does that mean? 143 00:06:45,988 --> 00:06:46,818 I mean… 144 00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,156 [clapping] 145 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:55,456 I would jump the fence at Santa Monica High School. 146 00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:57,750 I would climb into school 147 00:06:57,834 --> 00:07:00,044 because I'd have missed the first few periods, 148 00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:03,048 go to my girlfriend Jenee's typing class, 149 00:07:03,756 --> 00:07:04,876 and kind of hang out. 150 00:07:04,966 --> 00:07:09,136 Maybe go be a teacher's assistant at Theater Arts, 151 00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:11,180 and then climb back over the fence. 152 00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:12,394 [audience laughing] 153 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:18,353 I was not squeezing in a lot of early computer engineering classes, or… 154 00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:21,475 Did you-- You graduated from high school, right? 155 00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:23,396 I almost graduated. 156 00:07:23,484 --> 00:07:25,154 [audience laughing] 157 00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:28,951 I would have been-- [laughs] 158 00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:33,120 I got a GED. We'll get into that later, but-- 159 00:07:33,202 --> 00:07:35,202 And what became of your girlfriend? 160 00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:36,618 Um… 161 00:07:37,331 --> 00:07:38,881 I don't know. 162 00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:41,788 Well, she's here tonight. Come on out! 163 00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:44,088 [laughing, clapping] 164 00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:48,974 -That would be a great surprise. -Yeah. 165 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,799 Imagine the forethought to have walked me 166 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,308 into the Jenee Gravino story… 167 00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:55,480 [Letterman chuckling] 168 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:58,138 …because she's the only one who was still local 169 00:07:58,227 --> 00:07:59,977 that he could get to do a walkout. 170 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:03,573 Now, were your buddies, your high school buddies, 171 00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:05,489 also interested in the theater? 172 00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:08,988 Uh, like, there's three Sheen brothers. 173 00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:11,701 There's Emilio, who we know of, 174 00:08:11,782 --> 00:08:14,332 and there's Charlie, who's the youngest, 175 00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:17,080 and the middle brother is Ramon. 176 00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:18,710 Ramon Estevez. 177 00:08:18,789 --> 00:08:22,289 And when I was going to SaMo High, we were doing Oklahoma. 178 00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:24,296 -I'm sorry, SaMo High? -Santa Monica High School. 179 00:08:24,378 --> 00:08:25,628 You know, it's SaMo High. 180 00:08:25,713 --> 00:08:27,053 [audience laughing] 181 00:08:27,757 --> 00:08:28,967 Sorry, my Nicorette gum. 182 00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:31,390 I parked it, and then it got stuck to my teeth. 183 00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:34,308 And, at some point, depending on how long this goes, 184 00:08:34,388 --> 00:08:35,968 I'll need to re-up my nicotine. 185 00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:36,927 All right. 186 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:41,345 Um, Ramon Estevez is this very kind of eccentric middle brother. 187 00:08:41,437 --> 00:08:43,607 And he said, "You got cast as Will Parker, 188 00:08:43,689 --> 00:08:47,029 you're gonna have to tap dance, so come over to my studio, 189 00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,817 and I'll start giving you tap lessons." I was like, "You're what?" 190 00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:52,235 [Letterman chuckles] 191 00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:55,583 And, at their house, they had a little dance floor and a bar, 192 00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:59,710 with Ramon Estevez just drilling me on these tap dance routines. 193 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:03,753 I was looking around and going like, "Well, this is not what I expected." 194 00:09:03,834 --> 00:09:07,004 -[Letterman] No, no. -It came in handy later, I'll tell you. 195 00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:10,168 I'm wondering-- I'm thinking of Chaplin. 196 00:09:10,258 --> 00:09:12,008 I bet some of those skills, 197 00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,053 and maybe not, maybe I'm making this up, 198 00:09:14,136 --> 00:09:16,216 but were useful in that film. 199 00:09:16,305 --> 00:09:18,265 Yeah, it used to be on your résumé. 200 00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:20,599 It'd be called special skills, right? 201 00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:22,095 So, it'd be like, "Fencing?" 202 00:09:22,186 --> 00:09:23,016 "Yep." 203 00:09:23,104 --> 00:09:24,024 [Letterman laughing] 204 00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:26,105 "Do you ride horses?" "Like the wind." 205 00:09:26,190 --> 00:09:27,070 [laughter] 206 00:09:27,149 --> 00:09:28,989 "Okay, tap dancing?" 207 00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:31,108 "Definitely tap dancing. I can do that." 208 00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:34,026 Um, you know, it was all that stuff. 209 00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,905 So, now, this is your father. 210 00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:37,952 -This is you up through high school. -Yeah. 211 00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:40,075 -Your mother an actress. -[Robert] Absolutely. 212 00:09:40,162 --> 00:09:43,872 And her continuing role, regular role, in, uh… 213 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,878 -Mary Hartman. -Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman. 214 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:48,960 Yeah. And that was the last project she did, right? 215 00:09:49,046 --> 00:09:52,296 Yeah, it was later, and she played a character named Muriel, 216 00:09:52,383 --> 00:09:57,263 who was Charlie's odd ex-wife, and she was a burn victim, and… 217 00:09:57,346 --> 00:10:00,976 And it was just a... It was just an odd… thing, 218 00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:02,808 because I was used to her 219 00:10:02,893 --> 00:10:05,773 always being in my dad's movies or being at home with us, 220 00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:09,395 and then she was out again, in California, doing a real part. 221 00:10:09,483 --> 00:10:11,153 And, obviously, 222 00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:13,735 I wasn't seeing her as much 'cause she was working. 223 00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:16,621 And what you knew of her, was she good at what she did? 224 00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:17,699 -[Robert] Fantastic. -Yeah. 225 00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:20,163 And like my missus, who's sitting right there… 226 00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:21,084 Hi, hon. 227 00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:22,002 …says… 228 00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:23,079 [clapping, cheering] 229 00:10:24,206 --> 00:10:26,036 Susan Downey, Esquire. Hi. 230 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,665 -Nice to see you. -[Robert] Hi. 231 00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:29,842 She won't stand. I know she won't stand. 232 00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:31,800 She's waving us off. 233 00:10:32,423 --> 00:10:35,133 -Waving us off. -How long have you been married? 234 00:10:35,217 --> 00:10:37,797 -How did you meet your wife? -Susan and I were-- 235 00:10:37,887 --> 00:10:41,177 Well, there's this movie called Gothika. 236 00:10:41,265 --> 00:10:43,595 It's a Halle Berry kind of horror movie, right? 237 00:10:43,684 --> 00:10:44,694 Remember that movie? 238 00:10:45,186 --> 00:10:47,356 At the time that I was cast in Gothika, 239 00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:51,358 I was at the height of my, let's say, less than hireability. 240 00:10:51,442 --> 00:10:53,112 -[audience laughing] -And, um… 241 00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:57,034 I think I was making about 0.4 cents on the dollar, 242 00:10:57,114 --> 00:11:00,334 'cause I was having to cover my own insurance and all that stuff, 243 00:11:00,409 --> 00:11:02,789 and they said, "Susan, this guy might be trouble." 244 00:11:02,870 --> 00:11:06,000 "You'll have to keep an eye on him." And she did exactly that. 245 00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:07,962 And how long have you been married? 246 00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:12,052 We got married in 2005, so I guess it'll be, uh… 247 00:11:12,129 --> 00:11:13,839 -That's about 15. -[Robert] That'll be 15. 248 00:11:13,923 --> 00:11:15,303 -About 15. Well… -Yeah. 249 00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:16,843 [audience cheering, clapping] 250 00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:20,506 It's funny you say that too, 'cause… 251 00:11:21,430 --> 00:11:24,520 my folks were married for 15 years, and that seemed-- 252 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:27,730 Like, back in the... '60s, '70s, that was a good run. 253 00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:30,442 -[Letterman] Mm-hm. -And I think we're gonna beat it. 254 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,023 -[Letterman] Good. -Yeah. Double it. 255 00:11:32,108 --> 00:11:34,148 -That's good. [chuckles] -Triple it. 256 00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:37,195 Now, you have, like, a menagerie at your house. 257 00:11:37,279 --> 00:11:42,659 -It's the LA County Zoo West or something. -Yes, I'm like Dr. Dolittle with a budget. 258 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,196 -[laughs] -[audience laughing] 259 00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:46,827 [country music playing] 260 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:50,750 [birds chirping] 261 00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:55,214 The place was an old dog and horse rescue. 262 00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:56,917 You know what I mean, it's negative space. 263 00:11:57,007 --> 00:12:00,677 You see a paddock over there. You're like, "I bet we could put some goats in there." 264 00:12:00,761 --> 00:12:02,561 And these are all rescue animals? 265 00:12:03,055 --> 00:12:05,265 [Robert] Some of them are, 266 00:12:05,349 --> 00:12:07,889 and some of them we just procured, 267 00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:11,647 but they're all treated as though they just won the lottery. 268 00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:18,779 What exactly are alpacas? Are they in the alpaca family? 269 00:12:19,363 --> 00:12:23,083 Yeah, yeah, they're, like, less aggressive llamas. 270 00:12:23,159 --> 00:12:25,289 -That's my limited understanding. -And what about yaks? 271 00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,119 Are they in the yak family? 272 00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:30,537 I don't know where-- How they stack up with a yak. 273 00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:33,504 And, geographically, why do you have them? 274 00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:36,006 -This is a hobby? -Right. 275 00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:37,208 It's-- 276 00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:39,548 -We're in acquisitions around here-- -May I touch this? 277 00:12:39,633 --> 00:12:42,143 I wish you would. She's Fuzzy. She's very friendly. 278 00:12:42,219 --> 00:12:45,099 -She'd like to smell your head, probably. -Oh, they're charging! 279 00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:46,471 -Holy shit! -[Robert chuckles] 280 00:12:46,557 --> 00:12:47,927 Look out. Who did that? 281 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,727 Hey, leave him alone. 282 00:12:50,227 --> 00:12:52,147 -What was that? -They want to be led. 283 00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:54,319 These are the most docile, 284 00:12:54,398 --> 00:12:56,898 thoughtful, lovely creatures. 285 00:12:56,984 --> 00:12:59,904 I know nothing about alpacas. 286 00:12:59,987 --> 00:13:02,447 -Clearly. [chuckles] -Except these are very cute. 287 00:13:02,531 --> 00:13:04,371 What part of the world? Where are they? 288 00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:06,540 -In South America? -I think South America, yeah. 289 00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:10,459 How do they get the paperwork to come from South America all the way up here? 290 00:13:10,539 --> 00:13:11,369 Duly noted. 291 00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:15,127 All of California is a place where there's a lot of alpacas, 292 00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:17,211 and there's these gals that deal in alpacas, 293 00:13:17,296 --> 00:13:20,086 and they collect the wool, and they knit. 294 00:13:20,174 --> 00:13:22,844 -I think we're gonna lead them out. -They're so cute. 295 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:25,047 -Hello. -Yeah, she's super friendly. 296 00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:27,217 -Is it all right to touch them? -It very much is. 297 00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:30,477 [Letterman] These are the strangest-looking alpacas-- 298 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:32,439 [Robert] Those are the kunekune pigs. 299 00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:34,727 [Letterman] Whoa, man! 300 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:36,114 Why do you have these? 301 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:39,360 -[Robert] Look at them. They're fantastic. -Okay, come on, boys. [clicks tongue] 302 00:13:39,443 --> 00:13:40,283 Here we go. 303 00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:43,861 It has kind of a biblical feeling to it, doesn't it? 304 00:13:43,948 --> 00:13:46,028 -We taking them into town? -We're taking-- 305 00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:47,196 [Letterman chuckling] 306 00:13:47,284 --> 00:13:48,704 What kind of excrement-- 307 00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:52,156 [Robert] I think that would be-- That's pig dookie right there. 308 00:13:52,248 --> 00:13:53,328 That's from the pigs. 309 00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:55,575 And if I were them, I'd want to drop a couple pounds 310 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,498 on the way down to the playground myself. 311 00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,706 Now, she's the friendly one right here. 312 00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:02,045 There you go. 313 00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,720 [chuckling] 314 00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:07,389 -The animals, they love me. -Wow. 315 00:14:07,471 --> 00:14:10,181 -The animals just love me-- -A real alpaca whisperer. 316 00:14:10,266 --> 00:14:12,346 Look at this. What kind of tree is this? 317 00:14:12,434 --> 00:14:14,984 Uh, is it some kind of oak or something? 318 00:14:15,062 --> 00:14:17,062 -[chuckling] -I don't know what it-- 319 00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,364 -It's a cedar. -Cedar! 320 00:14:20,442 --> 00:14:21,942 -Is it a cedar? -I bet you're right. 321 00:14:22,027 --> 00:14:24,147 How long have you and your wife lived here? 322 00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:25,698 [Robert] Since 2009. 323 00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:27,201 I was pretty much-- 324 00:14:27,783 --> 00:14:29,033 Showed up with a duffel bag 325 00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:31,118 and was freeloading off her for a bunch of years, 326 00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:36,083 and then we pooled our resources when our ship came in and wound up here. 327 00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:39,086 Did Susan know what she was getting into when you guys met? 328 00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:42,879 No, she had that lovely Midwestern naivete. 329 00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:43,965 -Uh-huh. -Yeah. 330 00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:46,259 And then she had a radical education. 331 00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:47,473 She met both of me, 332 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:51,183 and then she ousted one of them and said she'd stick with the other one. 333 00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,845 Was that it? Was that the whole thing? Was that the change? 334 00:14:53,934 --> 00:14:56,154 Nothing's ever the whole thing, but I think you know, 335 00:14:56,228 --> 00:14:58,768 when you find a great life partner, 336 00:14:58,856 --> 00:15:02,436 you understand that sacrifice is not only necessary. 337 00:15:02,526 --> 00:15:04,646 -And ultimatums tend to work. -[Letterman] Yeah. 338 00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:08,663 [Robert] You've got Dandy and Miss Brain, 339 00:15:08,782 --> 00:15:11,832 and I am leading Fuzzy and the alpha, Madre. 340 00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:14,621 Miss Brain is such a cute name. 341 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,205 -Yeah, Miss Brain is a sweetie. -Whoa! 342 00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:17,960 Oh, she's really had it. 343 00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:20,209 I think they know where they're going. 344 00:15:20,711 --> 00:15:22,761 Let them go, or should we take them off their chains? 345 00:15:22,838 --> 00:15:25,838 No no, you tell me, but I was told we were gonna brand them. 346 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,375 [chuckling] 347 00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:30,385 You wanna do a little DL? 348 00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:31,351 [laughing] 349 00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:33,520 -D slash L? -[Letterman] That was-- 350 00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:35,889 -I've never done that before. -[Robert] Nor I. 351 00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:37,266 [chuckling] 352 00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:39,443 -But they're yours. -I know. [chuckling] 353 00:15:43,317 --> 00:15:48,447 What was the first non-family film you were in? 354 00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:52,991 Uh, John Sayles was casting a movie called Baby It's You, 355 00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:55,697 and it was Rosanna Arquette and this guy named Vinnie Spano, 356 00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,918 and I got cast in a small part. 357 00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:00,384 And I told all my friends. 358 00:16:00,876 --> 00:16:05,966 I said, "Check it. I made it. Name in lights. Get ready." 359 00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:07,298 [audience laughing] 360 00:16:07,383 --> 00:16:09,303 "It's on like Konkey Dong." 361 00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:13,312 And then, in the movie, I think there's one scene where I walk by 362 00:16:13,389 --> 00:16:16,429 and another scene where I'm at a table, but there's this girl leaning forward, 363 00:16:16,517 --> 00:16:18,847 so you can see everyone at the table except me. 364 00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:23,896 And my friends, to their credit, coined the phrase, "Maybe it's you." 365 00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,323 [laughing] 366 00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,663 But were you difficult? 367 00:16:31,865 --> 00:16:32,695 You know what I… 368 00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:34,163 [audience laughing] 369 00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:39,460 -I've read things about you that-- -If you sit forward, I'm sitting forward. 370 00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:40,420 -Go ahead. -Okay. 371 00:16:41,291 --> 00:16:42,131 Um… 372 00:16:43,127 --> 00:16:45,127 [audience laughing, clapping] 373 00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,303 Um… 374 00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:52,387 Just between us. Come on, go ahead. Whisper it. 375 00:16:52,469 --> 00:16:54,679 -No, now I'm uncomfortable. -All right, good. 376 00:16:54,763 --> 00:16:56,273 [audience laughing] 377 00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:57,388 [audience clapping] 378 00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:02,981 When I-- And I've watched, uh-- 379 00:17:03,063 --> 00:17:05,483 Over the years, I would watch your films, 380 00:17:05,566 --> 00:17:06,776 and I noticed a quality, 381 00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:09,949 and you explain to me if I'm right or wrong about this. 382 00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,659 When I'm watching you in a film, 383 00:17:13,157 --> 00:17:18,077 I-- It's almost like you're looking at me, saying, 384 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,371 "Don't worry, this is just a film. 385 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:25,206 Everything's gonna be fine. Let me just take care of business here." 386 00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,304 Am I imagining something? 387 00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:29,379 [Robert] Um, no, I don't think so. 388 00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:30,625 It's a familiarity. 389 00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,966 Maybe that's a better way to describe this. 390 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:36,062 I've heard other folks say this. I think Tom Hanks will say 391 00:17:36,138 --> 00:17:39,478 that we're supposed to host the experience for people, 392 00:17:39,975 --> 00:17:41,225 which is I think a-- 393 00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:44,647 One way of saying if I get out of my own way 394 00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:48,570 so I'm not self-centered and corrupting my own energy field, 395 00:17:48,650 --> 00:17:51,530 'cause I'm only thinking about my performance 396 00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:53,912 or my, you know, neuroses, 397 00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:57,659 then I can actually invite you in to have an experience of your own. 398 00:17:57,743 --> 00:18:01,253 I've been in things where somebody has said, 399 00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:04,580 -"Okay, here's your part. Just read this." -[Robert] Yeah. 400 00:18:04,666 --> 00:18:07,036 Now, this is not the case with you, 401 00:18:07,544 --> 00:18:10,384 and this is one of those things that, uh… 402 00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:13,514 Legend about Hollywood, I think, that's mostly true. 403 00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:17,052 You alter scripts fundamentally 404 00:18:17,137 --> 00:18:20,347 to the point of just moving the plot. 405 00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:23,522 -Am I right about that or not? -When I can. 406 00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:25,062 [laughing] 407 00:18:25,145 --> 00:18:27,855 And what is the motivation of that? 408 00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:28,980 I… 409 00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:32,073 Having been raised by writers, 410 00:18:32,152 --> 00:18:35,662 having been in situations where you see, 411 00:18:35,739 --> 00:18:37,739 "Here was the idea for the joke. 412 00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:41,369 -And here's the better play on that joke." -Mm-hm. 413 00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,913 And there are certain occasions where you go like, 414 00:18:43,997 --> 00:18:45,997 "This big block, I'm not gonna touch it." 415 00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:50,463 "I'm just gonna learn as best I can because you just shouldn't play with it." 416 00:18:50,546 --> 00:18:53,666 But pretty much everything else, I think it can always be improved. 417 00:18:53,757 --> 00:18:57,587 I'm not precious, and I'm not into wasting time, 418 00:18:57,678 --> 00:18:59,598 and I'm not into, you know, 419 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,390 "Let me change everything. Everyone has to learn everything else." 420 00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:05,394 But you read the room and you say, 421 00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:08,937 "How much room for innovation is there here?" 422 00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:11,732 Also, in certain circumstances, you just suck it up, 423 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,527 and you just do it the normal way. 424 00:19:13,610 --> 00:19:14,700 Is, um… 425 00:19:14,778 --> 00:19:18,568 Are we talking about a resistance of contrivance? 426 00:19:18,657 --> 00:19:19,657 Obvious contrivance. 427 00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:24,245 There's a more organic way to get this across? 428 00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:25,909 Well, I'll give you an example. 429 00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:27,618 Half a lifetime ago, 430 00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:29,998 I went to, uh… 431 00:19:32,087 --> 00:19:35,417 Lord Richard Attenborough, we were about to start shooting Chaplin, 432 00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:36,627 and I said, "Dickie…" 433 00:19:37,217 --> 00:19:38,177 Ha! 434 00:19:39,052 --> 00:19:40,642 [in British accent] "Yes, darling?" 435 00:19:40,721 --> 00:19:43,061 -"Listen, your script is a joke." -[laughing] 436 00:19:43,807 --> 00:19:45,347 -No! -"Um, I fixed it." 437 00:19:45,434 --> 00:19:47,644 Wait, excuse me. How old were you when this-- 438 00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:49,058 -Twenty-five. -[Letterman] Yeah. 439 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:50,436 [crowd laughing] 440 00:19:50,522 --> 00:19:53,442 I was like, "The script is a joke. No offense, but it's an episodic." 441 00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:54,985 "You're not really getting a sense--" 442 00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:57,988 "Don't you know that before he started shooting The Kid, 443 00:19:58,071 --> 00:20:00,371 his wife had miscarried and he saw, 444 00:20:00,449 --> 00:20:02,949 that was why he went and cast Jackie Coogan?" 445 00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,405 He's like, [in British accent] "So?" And I was like, "Well, that's deep." 446 00:20:06,496 --> 00:20:08,866 "That's really good, evocative. That's what people wanna see." 447 00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:11,537 He goes, [in British accent] "No, we're not shooting that." 448 00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:16,627 And then I kind of did a read-through of my version of his movie, Chaplin, 449 00:20:16,715 --> 00:20:18,965 and then he, I guess, sat through it, and he said, 450 00:20:19,051 --> 00:20:22,051 [in British accent] "Right. Anyway, see you on set next Monday," 451 00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:22,967 And then we… 452 00:20:23,555 --> 00:20:24,595 -We went there. -Wow. 453 00:20:24,681 --> 00:20:28,811 So, I think part of this was, I jumped the gun 454 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:32,864 with how collaborative I thought people wanted to be. 455 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:35,320 Also, at the end of the day, it's just opinions. 456 00:20:35,817 --> 00:20:39,107 Well, two things wash over me here. 457 00:20:39,196 --> 00:20:42,986 Uh, one, the impression of Richard Attenborough. 458 00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,164 -Tremendous. -Thank you. 459 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:46,374 [audience clapping] 460 00:20:47,454 --> 00:20:48,624 The greatest. 461 00:20:49,831 --> 00:20:54,671 And also, what I was taken by in looking at your filmography… 462 00:20:54,753 --> 00:20:57,053 "Robert Downey Jr. did Chaplin?" 463 00:20:57,130 --> 00:20:59,970 "Yeah, Robert Downey Jr. did Chaplin." 464 00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:01,590 And I watched the movie. 465 00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:03,848 It's tremendous art. 466 00:21:04,346 --> 00:21:05,256 It's unbelievable. 467 00:21:05,347 --> 00:21:07,217 [audience cheering, clapping] 468 00:21:10,060 --> 00:21:10,890 Well… 469 00:21:12,646 --> 00:21:14,476 Yeah, a lot of contributing factors. 470 00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:18,364 Uh, one was the first time I met Dickie, 471 00:21:18,443 --> 00:21:21,283 he held up a picture of Tom Cruise to me and said, 472 00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:23,913 [in British accent] "Now, isn't that a remarkable resemblance?" 473 00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:26,451 "Wouldn't it be amazing if Tom Cruise played--" 474 00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:29,705 And I was like, "Was I called in for a humility session?" 475 00:21:30,455 --> 00:21:33,075 -What was this? -I don't know what was going on then. 476 00:21:33,166 --> 00:21:35,246 I just, I "S" you not, 477 00:21:35,335 --> 00:21:38,205 he held a picture of Tom Cruise and said, "That's who should play Chaplin." 478 00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:40,547 -I was like, "Yeah, probably." -[audience laughing] 479 00:21:40,632 --> 00:21:43,262 Yeah, well, what are you supposed to do? 480 00:21:43,343 --> 00:21:46,053 -But he passed, so now what? -Get a cab at that point? 481 00:21:47,097 --> 00:21:48,807 Well, how intimidating is that? 482 00:21:48,890 --> 00:21:52,390 Because I think actors, like other artists, 483 00:21:52,477 --> 00:21:55,977 are insecure to begin with, and you get Richard Attenborough saying, 484 00:21:56,064 --> 00:21:59,824 "Oh, it's too damn bad we couldn't get Tommy." 485 00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:01,821 [audience laughing] 486 00:22:01,903 --> 00:22:03,033 That's as close as I-- 487 00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:04,283 -That was not bad. -Thanks. 488 00:22:04,364 --> 00:22:06,914 That was a little more North London. Pretty good. 489 00:22:06,992 --> 00:22:08,082 [clapping] 490 00:22:09,286 --> 00:22:10,696 [soft rock music playing] 491 00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:17,837 -I mean, you've made quite a few films. -Yeah. 492 00:22:17,919 --> 00:22:21,339 And do you ever get tired of what makes it tiring? 493 00:22:22,507 --> 00:22:26,847 Um, the anticipation of hard work is exhausting. 494 00:22:26,928 --> 00:22:28,678 -Yeah. -The execution-- 495 00:22:28,764 --> 00:22:30,314 I'm always down for a good, hard time, 496 00:22:30,891 --> 00:22:35,941 as long as it feels like there's a good, orderly direction, 497 00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:39,021 and people are getting along and respecting each other, it's fantastic. 498 00:22:39,107 --> 00:22:39,937 Fantastic. 499 00:22:40,025 --> 00:22:43,815 But what you described there, in life itself, is nearly impossible. 500 00:22:44,321 --> 00:22:47,321 -Orderly pursuit. -Yes. 501 00:22:47,824 --> 00:22:49,164 Yes, we call it-- 502 00:22:49,242 --> 00:22:52,542 Usually, it's 50 monkeys fucking a football. 503 00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:53,541 -Hello! -And then… 504 00:22:53,622 --> 00:22:55,292 I'm sorry! What? 505 00:22:58,835 --> 00:23:01,915 You know what? Is there anything here that needs to be milked? 506 00:23:03,298 --> 00:23:07,218 I mean, we could take a run at the goats, but it's not my idea of a good time. 507 00:23:07,302 --> 00:23:08,222 [laughs] 508 00:23:12,974 --> 00:23:15,604 -[Letterman] Here we go. -Right in front of you is Cutie Boots. 509 00:23:15,685 --> 00:23:16,515 She's a rescue. 510 00:23:16,603 --> 00:23:18,063 Where did they come from? 511 00:23:18,146 --> 00:23:19,766 Uh… a shelter. 512 00:23:19,856 --> 00:23:22,476 As you know, they have the horizontal-- 513 00:23:22,567 --> 00:23:25,487 -[Robert] Horizontal slit. It's crazy. -Yeah, the iris is not round. 514 00:23:25,570 --> 00:23:27,200 -It's horizontal. -[Robert] Yeah. 515 00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:30,990 But does-- The mechanism for vision must essentially be the same, 516 00:23:31,076 --> 00:23:32,326 but why that difference? 517 00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:33,251 I don't know. 518 00:23:34,246 --> 00:23:35,786 [chuckling] 519 00:23:38,083 --> 00:23:40,003 -[Letterman] These are beautiful. -[Robert] Yeah. 520 00:23:40,085 --> 00:23:42,455 [Letterman] Holy cow. Literally, holy cow. 521 00:23:42,546 --> 00:23:44,206 I just put this in here. 522 00:23:44,297 --> 00:23:45,507 -Yeah, yeah. -Yeah. 523 00:23:49,553 --> 00:23:51,303 Thanks for pretending to help. 524 00:23:51,388 --> 00:23:52,888 [Robert laughs] 525 00:23:52,973 --> 00:23:55,893 -See this stuff that looks like cow shit? -Yeah, what is that? 526 00:23:55,976 --> 00:23:58,476 [Letterman] I was gonna ask you if you had any idea what that was. 527 00:23:58,562 --> 00:24:02,692 I don't know if that's plastique explosive, or some sort of uh… 528 00:24:03,483 --> 00:24:04,323 gel ignite. 529 00:24:04,401 --> 00:24:05,901 [chuckles] Come on, boys. 530 00:24:05,986 --> 00:24:08,816 But we do have the area mined pretty heavily. 531 00:24:09,322 --> 00:24:11,912 In a matter of fact, just so you don't step on this and ignite it, 532 00:24:11,992 --> 00:24:13,292 I'll leave a marker there. 533 00:24:13,368 --> 00:24:14,198 [Letterman chuckles] 534 00:24:14,828 --> 00:24:17,248 [Robert] Belted Galloways. We call them Oreos. 535 00:24:17,330 --> 00:24:20,080 -And what is the history of this breed? -Scottish. 536 00:24:20,167 --> 00:24:22,167 [Letterman] And these are beef cows. 537 00:24:22,252 --> 00:24:24,672 These are not dairy cattle here. 538 00:24:24,754 --> 00:24:26,424 -These are-- -I'm really not sure. 539 00:24:27,549 --> 00:24:28,629 Maybe-- Can we-- 540 00:24:30,218 --> 00:24:31,638 May we approach the animals? 541 00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:32,890 Yeah, sure. Let's go. 542 00:24:32,971 --> 00:24:35,221 Whoa, there. [chuckling] 543 00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:38,137 Wow, they're beautiful, though. Will they get bigger? 544 00:24:38,226 --> 00:24:39,806 [Robert] I think they're fairly big. 545 00:24:39,895 --> 00:24:42,895 What do we think? 800 pounds? 1,000 pounds? 546 00:24:42,981 --> 00:24:45,481 -[man] Around there. -Yeah, around there. Half-ton. 547 00:24:45,984 --> 00:24:49,574 This is going so much better than I had imagined last night. 548 00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:50,534 I can't tell you. 549 00:24:52,199 --> 00:24:53,579 Okay, no. No trampling. 550 00:24:54,409 --> 00:24:56,949 Sad news from Malibu today. 551 00:24:57,037 --> 00:24:59,657 -Film star, Robert Downey Jr.-- -Who'd get top billing? 552 00:24:59,748 --> 00:25:02,788 I would never let anything happen to you on my watch, Dave. 553 00:25:02,876 --> 00:25:04,376 You know, I feel the same way. 554 00:25:06,171 --> 00:25:07,921 Because you have your whole life ahead of you. 555 00:25:08,006 --> 00:25:09,666 -Aw, thanks. -Look at me, I'm 100. 556 00:25:09,758 --> 00:25:11,638 I'd throw myself in front of them. 557 00:25:13,261 --> 00:25:15,681 -Not really. I'd throw him in front-- -Have you had your fun? 558 00:25:15,764 --> 00:25:19,024 I'd throw him in front of-- All right, let's just back away now. 559 00:25:19,100 --> 00:25:20,690 How did you get them here from Scotland? 560 00:25:20,769 --> 00:25:23,399 People show me pictures and say, "What about these?" 561 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,110 And I go, "Is this all you got?" 562 00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:27,975 "Let me see some other ones." 563 00:25:28,068 --> 00:25:29,898 And then, it's kind of like casting. 564 00:25:29,986 --> 00:25:31,066 [audience laughing] 565 00:25:32,030 --> 00:25:34,030 "Now, these two are brother and sister." 566 00:25:34,115 --> 00:25:37,285 "Oh, but aren't the pigs brother and sister?" 567 00:25:38,203 --> 00:25:40,913 Cutie Boots, and what's the other pig's name? 568 00:25:41,706 --> 00:25:42,866 Pops. 569 00:25:42,958 --> 00:25:43,788 Pops. 570 00:25:44,292 --> 00:25:46,842 -The pig's name is Pops. -Pops and Cutie Boots. 571 00:25:47,587 --> 00:25:50,257 And Flash, and Trigger, and Memo. 572 00:25:52,133 --> 00:25:53,763 Now, let me interject, uh… 573 00:25:53,843 --> 00:25:55,723 -Am I getting names wrong? -[laughter] 574 00:25:56,721 --> 00:25:58,851 I'm not a farmer, am I? 575 00:25:58,932 --> 00:25:59,892 Sorry, hon. 576 00:25:59,975 --> 00:26:04,555 Yeah. Okay. So, then I watched Less Than Zero. 577 00:26:04,646 --> 00:26:05,976 -Oh, wow. -And, oh… 578 00:26:06,064 --> 00:26:07,444 [audience clapping] 579 00:26:12,195 --> 00:26:13,565 It killed me, 580 00:26:13,655 --> 00:26:18,325 because I have a 16-year-old son, younger than your character, 581 00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:19,740 but, nonetheless, 582 00:26:20,495 --> 00:26:23,955 headed in the direction of adolescence and beyond. 583 00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:26,330 -Yep. -And it's pretty goddamn frightening. 584 00:26:26,418 --> 00:26:27,248 [Robert] Yeah. 585 00:26:27,335 --> 00:26:29,205 I saw it again recently too, 586 00:26:29,296 --> 00:26:33,046 and it's just kind of so of its time, and yet, I think you're right. 587 00:26:33,133 --> 00:26:34,973 It is a cautionary tale 588 00:26:35,051 --> 00:26:37,681 for kind of what folks try to do to fit in. 589 00:26:38,305 --> 00:26:40,925 And this director, Marek Kanievska, 590 00:26:41,016 --> 00:26:46,056 um, he was exceptional. Exceptional, exceptional guy. 591 00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:48,606 And we did rehearsals where he said, uh… 592 00:26:49,316 --> 00:26:52,986 He said, "I want you to go out and try to get Andrew McCarthy in trouble." 593 00:26:53,987 --> 00:26:55,697 I said, "That won't be a problem." 594 00:26:56,323 --> 00:26:57,993 He said, "Good. It's important." 595 00:26:58,074 --> 00:27:01,454 "I want, like, contact with law enforcement." 596 00:27:01,536 --> 00:27:04,996 "I want him having to talk to the cops out of putting you in the car." 597 00:27:05,081 --> 00:27:07,831 I go, "Also, that's not gonna-- That'll be pretty easy." 598 00:27:07,917 --> 00:27:08,877 [audience laughing] 599 00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:10,380 And he said, "I want Andrew McCarthy 600 00:27:10,462 --> 00:27:13,212 to feel like he's responsible for whether you live or die." 601 00:27:13,298 --> 00:27:16,008 -Whoa. -And I was like, "Wow. Okay." 602 00:27:16,092 --> 00:27:19,262 And then enter McCarthy, who was like, "Marek has these crazy ideas." 603 00:27:19,346 --> 00:27:24,096 "Will you stop walking on the median on Santa Monica Boulevard 604 00:27:24,184 --> 00:27:25,354 and getting cops to pull over 605 00:27:25,435 --> 00:27:27,265 and think you're crazy, or drunk, or something?" 606 00:27:27,354 --> 00:27:28,194 I said, "No." 607 00:27:28,855 --> 00:27:31,725 While I was already a little bit ensconced, 608 00:27:31,816 --> 00:27:35,856 the depravity and the excess that that movie represented, 609 00:27:36,780 --> 00:27:38,990 it was kind of like I got to put on the mask 610 00:27:39,074 --> 00:27:41,204 of a worst-case scenario thing, you know, 611 00:27:41,868 --> 00:27:44,368 and kind of express myself through it a little bit. 612 00:27:44,454 --> 00:27:46,464 What was the step that you missed 613 00:27:46,539 --> 00:27:52,799 that caused you to over-experiment or overindulge, or indulge at all? 614 00:27:53,713 --> 00:27:57,303 First of all, I think it's always a cultural thing, you know? 615 00:27:58,009 --> 00:27:59,759 And, um, in-- 616 00:27:59,844 --> 00:28:03,644 As the AMA will say that alcoholism or addiction, 617 00:28:03,723 --> 00:28:05,853 it's essentially a brain disease, 618 00:28:05,934 --> 00:28:07,444 but it's a brain disease that… 619 00:28:09,062 --> 00:28:12,072 people don't wanna take the cure for when it's offered. 620 00:28:12,148 --> 00:28:13,938 So, it's a very insidious thing. 621 00:28:14,025 --> 00:28:16,815 But as far as where a tipping point was, I don't know-- 622 00:28:16,903 --> 00:28:21,953 You were a kid, relatively speaking, when this began in a serious fashion. 623 00:28:22,033 --> 00:28:23,623 -Yeah, and-- -Now, I don't-- 624 00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:26,659 I have no understanding of this other than my own-- 625 00:28:26,746 --> 00:28:30,246 I was an alcoholic, but it's-- And there are many-- 626 00:28:30,333 --> 00:28:32,003 -Wait, you were an alcoholic? -Yes. 627 00:28:32,085 --> 00:28:33,205 Yeah. Yeah. 628 00:28:34,796 --> 00:28:36,006 [audience laughing] 629 00:28:36,089 --> 00:28:40,139 I mean, wow. I'm gonna watch this back and say I actually learned something. 630 00:28:40,218 --> 00:28:42,428 [chuckling] But, uh… 631 00:28:42,512 --> 00:28:45,522 So, when you were at your lowest, and there are points-- 632 00:28:45,598 --> 00:28:49,388 And I did the chronology on this loosely, 633 00:28:49,477 --> 00:28:54,187 and the trouble seems to have spanned from 1996… 634 00:28:54,274 --> 00:28:55,114 Yes. 635 00:28:55,191 --> 00:28:56,281 …to about 2004. 636 00:28:56,359 --> 00:28:57,779 -Correct. -Now, we-- 637 00:28:57,861 --> 00:28:58,701 [audience laughs] 638 00:28:58,778 --> 00:29:02,408 We assume that because the records don't go back that far, 639 00:29:02,490 --> 00:29:04,120 that there was something prior-- 640 00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:07,410 -There's a prehistory there. -Yeah. And I'm thinking to myself, 641 00:29:07,495 --> 00:29:11,205 "He kept doing it, uh, and kept working." 642 00:29:11,291 --> 00:29:13,841 Was it fun to keep doing it? 643 00:29:13,918 --> 00:29:14,748 Nope. 644 00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:19,800 -So, that's interesting, isn't it? -Yeah, but, I mean, from roughly-- 645 00:29:19,883 --> 00:29:23,683 From the first time, the first cigarette, joint, you know, drug, whatever, 646 00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:25,602 from the ages of 8 to 38, 647 00:29:26,097 --> 00:29:27,717 that's a crazy-- 648 00:29:27,807 --> 00:29:29,847 Like, for my generation, and I-- 649 00:29:29,934 --> 00:29:32,444 -Eight to 38? -Yeah, basically eight to 38. 650 00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:34,480 -Eight to 38? -[Robert] You heard me. 651 00:29:34,564 --> 00:29:35,984 [audience laughing] 652 00:29:36,065 --> 00:29:40,105 Now, is this the often-cited situation at the-- 653 00:29:40,195 --> 00:29:42,315 Your father and you sharing marijuana? 654 00:29:42,405 --> 00:29:44,155 Yeah, you know, and… 655 00:29:44,866 --> 00:29:46,656 culturally speaking, 656 00:29:46,743 --> 00:29:51,963 the entire ecosystem we were in was all about, 657 00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:55,170 "If they're saying we shouldn't do this, we're doubling down." 658 00:29:56,085 --> 00:29:58,045 Because it was a time when-- 659 00:29:58,129 --> 00:30:01,009 How mysterious, things tend to repeat themselves. 660 00:30:01,090 --> 00:30:04,970 The distrust of the machinations of government, 661 00:30:05,053 --> 00:30:07,973 and society, and the haves and the haves nots-- 662 00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:10,386 So, to me, it was just a culture that I was raised in. 663 00:30:10,475 --> 00:30:15,055 Now, if we were to have a Robert Downey Jr. film festival… 664 00:30:15,146 --> 00:30:16,106 Yes. 665 00:30:16,189 --> 00:30:17,609 …uh, which is… 666 00:30:17,690 --> 00:30:18,900 [audience laughing] 667 00:30:18,983 --> 00:30:20,443 -Which is a-- -A bad idea. 668 00:30:20,527 --> 00:30:21,357 [chuckling] 669 00:30:21,444 --> 00:30:22,654 [audience clapping] 670 00:30:24,364 --> 00:30:28,284 Would you be willing, or could anybody else say, 671 00:30:28,368 --> 00:30:30,908 "Oh, I bet he's in trouble here." 672 00:30:30,995 --> 00:30:33,365 "This movie, he looks like he's not in trouble." 673 00:30:33,456 --> 00:30:34,286 -Right. -"This--" 674 00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:38,754 I mean, is it that apparent, or were you able to work through this, 675 00:30:38,837 --> 00:30:41,167 or you didn't use when you were working? 676 00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:45,586 Right. Yeah, I mean, there was a single crossover, 677 00:30:45,677 --> 00:30:49,057 and I call it the most relaxed performance in the history of cinema, 678 00:30:49,639 --> 00:30:50,599 -Um… -[chuckling] 679 00:30:50,682 --> 00:30:54,192 called Home for the Holidays, which is a movie I did with Jodie Foster, 680 00:30:54,811 --> 00:30:57,731 and she was really critical and just being like, 681 00:30:57,814 --> 00:31:00,734 "Well, looks like you're getting away with it on this one." 682 00:31:00,817 --> 00:31:04,647 "I wouldn't try this again, because we're kind of a forgiving group." 683 00:31:04,737 --> 00:31:06,487 And I was like, "Wasn't that last take great?" 684 00:31:06,573 --> 00:31:09,163 She goes, "Yeah, you're great." "It's going great." 685 00:31:09,826 --> 00:31:11,036 -Um… -[laughing] 686 00:31:11,119 --> 00:31:12,659 [audience laughing] 687 00:31:13,663 --> 00:31:16,583 And then when I was, you know, locked up in a penitentiary, 688 00:31:16,666 --> 00:31:17,826 she sent me a letter saying, 689 00:31:17,917 --> 00:31:20,837 "Let me tell you what I meant by 'It's going great.'" 690 00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:22,340 You know, but, uh… 691 00:31:22,422 --> 00:31:24,632 [Letterman] You're in prison for crap's sake, 692 00:31:25,091 --> 00:31:28,641 and what does it represent to you now, that period? 693 00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:31,060 I don't want the details of being in prison. 694 00:31:31,139 --> 00:31:32,269 Are you sure? 695 00:31:32,974 --> 00:31:34,644 [audience laughing] 696 00:31:34,726 --> 00:31:37,266 -I've been through some bad stuff too. -Yeah. 697 00:31:37,353 --> 00:31:41,863 And people who go overseas and fight come home with PTSD. 698 00:31:41,941 --> 00:31:42,941 A hundred percent. 699 00:31:43,026 --> 00:31:47,406 So, we assume that, at its worst, that stays with you the rest of your life. 700 00:31:47,906 --> 00:31:50,656 Well, first of all, I never thought when I was a kid-- 701 00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:54,912 Like, if someone had sat me down and said, "Listen, heh, you're gonna love this." 702 00:31:54,996 --> 00:31:56,366 [audience laughing] 703 00:31:56,456 --> 00:31:58,626 "Here's the way your life is gonna lay out." 704 00:31:58,708 --> 00:32:00,748 I would have screeched. 705 00:32:00,835 --> 00:32:03,125 But I knew-- 706 00:32:03,212 --> 00:32:04,712 And this judge, Judge Mira-- 707 00:32:04,797 --> 00:32:08,377 I knew that I was playing with a guy 708 00:32:08,468 --> 00:32:11,798 who was not kidding about the fact that a suspended sentence 709 00:32:11,888 --> 00:32:15,138 means if you do well, we won't send you away, 710 00:32:15,224 --> 00:32:18,564 and once that suspended sentence is no longer suspended, 711 00:32:18,645 --> 00:32:21,185 it drops on you, and you gotta go do your time. 712 00:32:21,272 --> 00:32:24,732 And I think it was just a sort of an arrested development 713 00:32:24,817 --> 00:32:28,817 of not believing that the repercussions-- 714 00:32:28,905 --> 00:32:31,405 Thinking I could sneak around and get away with it. 715 00:32:31,491 --> 00:32:33,371 So, I'll look back through some stuff, 716 00:32:33,451 --> 00:32:36,041 like Back to School, the Rodney Dangerfield movie. 717 00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:39,330 There was a scene or two there where I remember-- 718 00:32:39,415 --> 00:32:42,665 I was not blotto while we were shooting, 719 00:32:42,752 --> 00:32:47,262 but I had literally just been woken up out of a near coma 720 00:32:47,340 --> 00:32:49,760 to go do, like, a five-page scene. 721 00:32:50,259 --> 00:32:52,889 And back then, when you're a kid-- 722 00:32:52,971 --> 00:32:53,811 I was doing that 723 00:32:53,888 --> 00:32:57,018 and shooting Saturday Night Live, alternately. 724 00:32:57,517 --> 00:32:58,887 You could say it was "fun." 725 00:32:58,977 --> 00:33:01,307 -But it was pretty stressful too. -Mm-hm, mm-hm. 726 00:33:01,396 --> 00:33:03,226 We're talking about cocaine? 727 00:33:03,982 --> 00:33:06,402 -Yes. -Talking about other substances? 728 00:33:06,484 --> 00:33:08,074 -Oh, yeah, I mean-- -Heroin? 729 00:33:08,152 --> 00:33:12,032 Yes, but, by the way, I like drinking a lot too. 730 00:33:12,532 --> 00:33:14,662 I just wanna see if we can relate to each other. 731 00:33:14,742 --> 00:33:15,872 [audience laughing] 732 00:33:15,952 --> 00:33:19,292 Sometimes, if I was getting on one of those coast-to-coast flights, 733 00:33:19,372 --> 00:33:21,582 if the flight crew had gotten to know me, 734 00:33:21,666 --> 00:33:24,086 they would just empty out a whole-- 735 00:33:24,168 --> 00:33:27,298 like a little trough of little mini bottles just for me. 736 00:33:27,380 --> 00:33:28,720 Same thing happened to me. 737 00:33:28,798 --> 00:33:31,968 I'm coming back from a club date in Denver. 738 00:33:32,051 --> 00:33:33,801 Flying home, they get to know me. 739 00:33:33,886 --> 00:33:36,756 They just handed me the quart that they had up in the gallery-- 740 00:33:36,848 --> 00:33:40,018 There it is, service with a smile. Oh, my God. 741 00:33:40,101 --> 00:33:41,981 But then, uh… 742 00:33:42,061 --> 00:33:44,651 If what I read is accurate, 743 00:33:44,731 --> 00:33:47,861 uh, you talk to your mother, at a very low point… 744 00:33:47,942 --> 00:33:48,822 Yes. 745 00:33:48,901 --> 00:33:51,071 …uh, and that's when you stopped. 746 00:33:51,154 --> 00:33:55,744 And I assume that there had been rehab here, rehab there. 747 00:33:55,825 --> 00:33:57,075 Oh, you bet. 748 00:33:57,869 --> 00:33:59,289 I love a good rehab. 749 00:33:59,370 --> 00:34:01,580 -But it didn't-- -It's like a rest stop. 750 00:34:01,664 --> 00:34:03,214 It didn't take, did it? 751 00:34:03,875 --> 00:34:07,125 Well, I also think it takes what it takes, and-- 752 00:34:07,211 --> 00:34:09,761 'Cause I know a fair amount of people right now, 753 00:34:09,839 --> 00:34:10,839 because, guess what? 754 00:34:10,923 --> 00:34:12,883 You know, addiction, alcoholism 755 00:34:12,967 --> 00:34:15,547 are thriving as much today as they ever were. 756 00:34:16,429 --> 00:34:21,639 And you see them, you know, of a certain age, 757 00:34:21,726 --> 00:34:24,726 and they're just starting to get into the denial, 758 00:34:24,812 --> 00:34:28,072 and then the repercussions, and then, you know, the court cases, 759 00:34:28,149 --> 00:34:29,229 and then the this and that. 760 00:34:29,317 --> 00:34:32,027 It kind of just makes me reflective on what is that really about? 761 00:34:32,111 --> 00:34:33,611 And why do people ever change? 762 00:34:33,696 --> 00:34:38,236 And how much of it is luck, and how much of it is trying to develop 763 00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:39,696 a good moral psychology? 764 00:34:39,786 --> 00:34:42,366 'Cause you would do the gig, and then it used to be, 765 00:34:42,455 --> 00:34:44,365 "Well, we did our performance thing." 766 00:34:44,457 --> 00:34:45,957 -"Now, this is our time." -That's right. 767 00:34:46,042 --> 00:34:48,212 And our time in the community used to mean, 768 00:34:48,294 --> 00:34:50,214 "Let's get the bottle. Let's get the thing." 769 00:34:50,296 --> 00:34:53,926 We need to be rewarded for what we have done. 770 00:34:54,008 --> 00:34:55,678 But I-- I'm sorry to interrupt. 771 00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:57,800 -No, please. -Take a look at the monitor right there. 772 00:34:59,138 --> 00:35:02,228 [chuckles] Dave, do you want me to smooth the back of your hair? 773 00:35:02,308 --> 00:35:05,138 Will you take care of it? I have no idea what they're talking about. 774 00:35:05,228 --> 00:35:07,308 [Robert] Oh, my God. You're right. Hold on. 775 00:35:07,396 --> 00:35:09,146 [audience clapping, cheering] 776 00:35:09,232 --> 00:35:11,692 -Do you want me to dip coffee or water? -Whatever it takes. 777 00:35:12,193 --> 00:35:13,693 I'm just tired of being… 778 00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:15,108 [audience laughing] 779 00:35:15,947 --> 00:35:17,487 [laughing intensifies] 780 00:35:18,407 --> 00:35:19,367 Thank you. 781 00:35:19,867 --> 00:35:20,907 Thank you very much. 782 00:35:20,993 --> 00:35:22,163 [audience clapping] 783 00:35:23,496 --> 00:35:24,826 [Letterman] God bless you. 784 00:35:26,457 --> 00:35:28,957 Uh, but from my experience, and I can remember, 785 00:35:29,544 --> 00:35:32,304 uh, when I was nine or ten having my first drink. 786 00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:33,510 My dad just said-- 787 00:35:33,589 --> 00:35:36,929 It was Christmas time. He was drinking scotch and soda. 788 00:35:37,009 --> 00:35:40,299 "You want to?" "Sure, I wanna try it." And it was bang, zoom. 789 00:35:40,388 --> 00:35:41,888 It wasn't like, "No." 790 00:35:41,973 --> 00:35:44,103 It was, "Holy cow!" 791 00:35:44,183 --> 00:35:46,393 And I kept drinking, and I-- 792 00:35:46,477 --> 00:35:49,187 My experience, not that anybody cares, but I love talking about myself. 793 00:35:49,272 --> 00:35:51,022 We do. This is actually new information. 794 00:35:51,524 --> 00:35:53,324 I would go to the doctor for a checkup, 795 00:35:53,401 --> 00:35:56,571 and he'd say, "Oh, jeez, your liver seems a little swollen." 796 00:35:56,654 --> 00:35:58,244 And he said, "Do you drink?" 797 00:35:58,322 --> 00:36:00,742 And I said, "I have a beer every now and then." 798 00:36:00,825 --> 00:36:03,575 But that's not true. I was drunk every gosh dang day. 799 00:36:03,661 --> 00:36:04,501 Wow. 800 00:36:04,579 --> 00:36:08,459 And so, finally, when I get to be 34, and I had another shot at television, 801 00:36:08,541 --> 00:36:12,881 I realized the only thing I can do to throw this away 802 00:36:13,546 --> 00:36:16,466 is let alcohol run my life. 803 00:36:16,966 --> 00:36:18,756 And, boom, that was it. 804 00:36:18,843 --> 00:36:22,973 And have not had anything to drink ever since, and-- 805 00:36:23,055 --> 00:36:25,805 -[audience clapping, cheering] -Oh, thank you very much. 806 00:36:28,060 --> 00:36:32,270 This colors my understanding of you, 807 00:36:32,773 --> 00:36:35,403 because, maybe back in the day, I would've been like, 808 00:36:35,484 --> 00:36:37,364 "What's he looking at me all stern for?" 809 00:36:37,445 --> 00:36:41,365 "He's probably getting his liver pushed on saying everything's fine too." 810 00:36:41,449 --> 00:36:43,579 -No, it was-- -My gosh. You already had-- 811 00:36:43,659 --> 00:36:47,959 I'm so grateful not to have that as a control of me. 812 00:36:48,039 --> 00:36:50,039 -Oh, yeah. -For better or for worse. 813 00:36:50,124 --> 00:36:54,384 And so grateful that I didn't hurt someone else in the process. 814 00:36:54,962 --> 00:36:56,302 Absolutely, man. 815 00:36:56,380 --> 00:36:57,550 [audience clapping] 816 00:36:59,842 --> 00:37:01,092 [birds chirping] 817 00:37:01,969 --> 00:37:04,849 Um… do we have some feed for Dave? 818 00:37:05,806 --> 00:37:08,176 -Oh, my God. This is fantastic. -Oh, now, this was gonna be-- 819 00:37:08,267 --> 00:37:09,937 -Oh, look, the poor thing. -Yeah. 820 00:37:10,436 --> 00:37:15,816 Oh, by the way, it's kind of customary that I go make some Arnold Palmers 821 00:37:15,900 --> 00:37:17,860 when folks are here, and you put in some hard work. 822 00:37:17,944 --> 00:37:20,034 -I'll catch you in a bit. -I haven't broken a sweat. 823 00:37:20,112 --> 00:37:21,572 [Robert] Great. Well, you will. 824 00:37:21,656 --> 00:37:24,946 This-- This makes that Jack Hanna look like a dope, doesn't it? 825 00:37:25,034 --> 00:37:27,374 Here you go, buddy. Here, have some of this. 826 00:37:27,453 --> 00:37:30,503 If I had to do this all day… 827 00:37:31,958 --> 00:37:33,288 there are worse things. 828 00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:35,133 [guitar playing] 829 00:37:44,095 --> 00:37:44,965 Now, uh… 830 00:37:45,805 --> 00:37:48,425 We're in the pig, literally the pigpen, 831 00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:51,017 and I'm taking care of the, uh… 832 00:37:52,561 --> 00:37:53,401 you know. 833 00:38:11,414 --> 00:38:13,084 -Thank you. -There you go, Cedro. 834 00:38:13,165 --> 00:38:14,915 Thanks a lot. How's it going, Dave? 835 00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:18,634 Good. What the… [clears throat] 836 00:38:19,630 --> 00:38:20,460 Okay. 837 00:38:21,090 --> 00:38:22,050 I get round two? 838 00:38:23,592 --> 00:38:24,932 Oh, God. I'm sorry. 839 00:38:25,428 --> 00:38:26,298 Heh. 840 00:38:26,387 --> 00:38:27,427 Are you? 841 00:38:27,513 --> 00:38:30,103 -You ever do this, Robert? -Never once. 842 00:38:30,182 --> 00:38:32,102 But you know what? You've inspired me. 843 00:38:32,184 --> 00:38:37,234 I may start interacting more directly in the care of the animals. 844 00:38:37,315 --> 00:38:38,265 Now, look at that. 845 00:38:38,357 --> 00:38:40,227 -Goddang! Nice work, buddy. -Yeah, exactly. 846 00:38:40,318 --> 00:38:41,898 I'm not kidding around, pal. 847 00:38:41,986 --> 00:38:44,196 -[Robert] It is a meditation, isn't it? -It is. 848 00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:46,490 Chop wood, carry water, you know? 849 00:38:46,574 --> 00:38:49,294 This is me imparting my spiritual wisdom. 850 00:38:50,369 --> 00:38:51,999 Who does this when I'm not here? 851 00:38:52,079 --> 00:38:54,369 Is Conan O'Brien coming up next week? 852 00:38:54,457 --> 00:38:55,617 [laughing] 853 00:38:55,708 --> 00:38:57,838 -Look, who does that? -You wanna see this, trust me. 854 00:38:57,918 --> 00:38:58,748 Nobody. 855 00:38:59,337 --> 00:39:02,797 You think Ellen would be out here doing-- No, she has people to do it. 856 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:06,842 What about your-- You mentioned your kids. 857 00:39:07,345 --> 00:39:10,095 What about your parenting? You and your wife with your kids? 858 00:39:10,181 --> 00:39:12,561 I don't have all that much say in the parenting. 859 00:39:12,641 --> 00:39:14,271 -I just show up. -[chuckling] 860 00:39:14,352 --> 00:39:17,812 I show-- I'm like a limo driver from the '80s. 861 00:39:17,897 --> 00:39:19,817 "Be there at eight o'clock as directed." 862 00:39:19,899 --> 00:39:23,779 Here's a question you get all the time. Do the kids like seeing you in your films? 863 00:39:23,861 --> 00:39:25,031 Yeah, I guess so. 864 00:39:25,112 --> 00:39:28,492 They have a passing interest in me, generally. 865 00:39:28,574 --> 00:39:30,624 -A passing interest. -[audience laughing] 866 00:39:31,118 --> 00:39:33,748 But I can also tell, like, uh… 867 00:39:34,246 --> 00:39:38,126 Like, Exton, our boy, like, he has an Iron Man. 868 00:39:38,209 --> 00:39:40,459 A pretty dumb, cheap one too. I should get him a good one. 869 00:39:40,544 --> 00:39:43,674 A little Iron Man head by his bed, and I go like, 870 00:39:43,756 --> 00:39:46,756 "Does he have that 'cause he likes that-- Him better than Hawkeye?" 871 00:39:46,842 --> 00:39:49,602 "I think he likes Hawkeye better. Is he just trying to let me know 872 00:39:49,678 --> 00:39:53,928 that I'm still up there somewhere in the top ten superheroes he likes?" 873 00:39:54,016 --> 00:39:54,886 You know. 874 00:39:54,975 --> 00:39:55,935 I-- When they-- 875 00:39:56,018 --> 00:39:58,228 When that thing clamps onto your head, 876 00:39:58,312 --> 00:40:01,402 is that thing really there, or is it not really there? 877 00:40:01,482 --> 00:40:02,442 Excellent question. 878 00:40:02,525 --> 00:40:03,395 'Cause it-- 879 00:40:03,901 --> 00:40:05,031 [chuckling] 880 00:40:05,111 --> 00:40:06,571 [audience laughing, clapping] 881 00:40:08,030 --> 00:40:11,830 Initially, it was-- Everything was really there. 882 00:40:11,909 --> 00:40:14,499 They wanted to spend as little as they could 883 00:40:14,578 --> 00:40:16,538 on CG replacement. 884 00:40:16,622 --> 00:40:19,632 So I remember this helmet went on, and, like, 885 00:40:19,708 --> 00:40:22,708 there'd be a shot, and I'd be in this whole suit. 886 00:40:22,795 --> 00:40:25,625 And they'd say, "All right, Robert, it's like you landed on the roof, 887 00:40:25,714 --> 00:40:27,134 so when we say 'action,' 888 00:40:27,216 --> 00:40:29,716 just go like that, like he just landed, and start moving forward." 889 00:40:29,802 --> 00:40:31,182 So I put this helmet on, 890 00:40:31,887 --> 00:40:34,267 and it slammed closed, and I couldn't see anything. 891 00:40:34,348 --> 00:40:36,678 And then these LED lights went on, 892 00:40:36,767 --> 00:40:38,727 and it was like Manchurian Candidate. 893 00:40:38,811 --> 00:40:40,811 Like, I couldn't-- I was absolutely blinded. 894 00:40:40,896 --> 00:40:43,436 By the time were doing the last Avengers, they'd just be like, 895 00:40:43,524 --> 00:40:45,034 "Robert, would you mind putting on--" 896 00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:46,189 "Helmet?" "No." 897 00:40:46,277 --> 00:40:47,737 "Yes." "No." 898 00:40:47,820 --> 00:40:50,360 "No, put two dots here, and then you can paint it in later." 899 00:40:51,407 --> 00:40:53,617 -[Letterman] Do this from your house. -Yeah. 900 00:40:53,701 --> 00:40:56,871 Now, did I ask you about comics when you were a kid? 901 00:40:56,954 --> 00:40:59,424 Superhero, Marvel kind of comics when you were a kid? 902 00:40:59,498 --> 00:41:00,368 All comics. 903 00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:05,048 Archie Comics, Sgt. Rock, Spider-Man, Iron Man, Fantastic Four, X-Men. 904 00:41:05,129 --> 00:41:06,669 -All that stuff. -So all of-- 905 00:41:06,755 --> 00:41:09,085 None of this was new territory for you. 906 00:41:09,925 --> 00:41:11,135 Not really, I mean… 907 00:41:11,218 --> 00:41:14,258 I mean, the genre had already been kicked off 908 00:41:14,346 --> 00:41:16,136 a couple times, you know? 909 00:41:16,223 --> 00:41:20,903 It seemed like it was a genre that wanted to have more legs-- 910 00:41:20,978 --> 00:41:22,648 You changed it, you… 911 00:41:22,730 --> 00:41:26,690 Um, you humanized it in a very entertaining fashion. 912 00:41:26,775 --> 00:41:27,735 Okay. 913 00:41:27,818 --> 00:41:29,148 Don't you think? Now… 914 00:41:29,236 --> 00:41:30,606 [cheering, clapping] 915 00:41:33,365 --> 00:41:36,155 So, here's what I was talking about earlier. 916 00:41:36,243 --> 00:41:38,413 At the end of the first one… 917 00:41:39,288 --> 00:41:42,828 uh, you changed the script at the press conference. 918 00:41:42,917 --> 00:41:44,627 Have I got this correct? 919 00:41:45,628 --> 00:41:48,838 Jon and I changed the script every 45 seconds. 920 00:41:48,923 --> 00:41:49,763 -Jon Favreau? -Yes. 921 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:52,340 And I knew we're gonna try, "I am Iron Man." 922 00:41:52,426 --> 00:41:54,846 We knew we didn't want to have it be a "secret identity." 923 00:41:55,429 --> 00:41:56,929 And, at this point, your-- 924 00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:59,734 Anyone's guess is as good as mine to really whose idea it was. 925 00:41:59,808 --> 00:42:02,308 I'll say it was Jon's so I don't have to get a phone call later. 926 00:42:02,394 --> 00:42:04,734 Yeah. It's a pretty good story. 927 00:42:04,813 --> 00:42:06,693 I'm telling people that it was you, 928 00:42:06,774 --> 00:42:08,904 because the way it looks 929 00:42:08,984 --> 00:42:13,534 is we have a two, three hundred-million-dollar production, 930 00:42:13,614 --> 00:42:17,124 and it's going one way, and you say, "You know, we're going this way." 931 00:42:17,201 --> 00:42:18,491 And I love that. 932 00:42:18,577 --> 00:42:21,907 And, so, even if it's close to being true, nice going. 933 00:42:21,997 --> 00:42:22,917 Yeah. 934 00:42:22,998 --> 00:42:24,418 [clapping] 935 00:42:26,544 --> 00:42:29,464 So, are you working on a movie now? Is there another movie? 936 00:42:29,547 --> 00:42:33,837 Are you gonna be in the Marvel comic things anymore? 937 00:42:33,926 --> 00:42:35,966 -Is that part of your life closed? -No, I kind of-- 938 00:42:36,053 --> 00:42:38,183 -Will you go somewhere else? -I feel I'm done with that. 939 00:42:38,264 --> 00:42:39,974 Can you make a certain kind of movie, 940 00:42:40,057 --> 00:42:43,187 a well-written tightly scripted, 941 00:42:43,269 --> 00:42:46,269 nicely directed, simple film for a million? 942 00:42:46,355 --> 00:42:47,435 Could you do that today? 943 00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:51,193 -Five hundred thousand? -A million's tough. Uh… 944 00:42:51,277 --> 00:42:53,237 [Letterman] Well, no, not with you in it. No. 945 00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:55,610 That's my dry-cleaning budget. 946 00:42:55,698 --> 00:42:57,278 -[chuckling] -No, um… 947 00:42:58,158 --> 00:43:00,868 The truth be told is, nowadays, more than ever, 948 00:43:00,953 --> 00:43:03,713 you can do any project for any budget. 949 00:43:04,206 --> 00:43:06,376 -But it better be great. -Yeah. 950 00:43:06,458 --> 00:43:10,748 Because, nowadays, what I'm, you know, drawn to is, 951 00:43:10,838 --> 00:43:13,048 "Wow, that's a really cool new take on this," 952 00:43:13,132 --> 00:43:17,472 or, "I-- That gal is a fantastic director. I can't wait to see what she does next." 953 00:43:17,553 --> 00:43:20,513 Are you working on a movie now? What will you do? I guess-- 954 00:43:20,598 --> 00:43:21,678 What will he do next? 955 00:43:21,765 --> 00:43:24,175 Yeah, that's right. Here's the dumb guy question. 956 00:43:24,268 --> 00:43:27,728 "Well, jeez, now that you're not Iron Man, what will you be? 957 00:43:27,813 --> 00:43:30,443 I know. What are you supposed to do if you're not Iron Man anymore? 958 00:43:30,524 --> 00:43:33,534 Um, you know, I ask myself that same question. 959 00:43:33,611 --> 00:43:36,361 I'm on a bit of a forced rest, 960 00:43:36,447 --> 00:43:40,157 and just kind of paying attention, 961 00:43:40,242 --> 00:43:43,912 and trying to catch up with what everyone else is doing, 962 00:43:43,996 --> 00:43:45,456 and, you know, like-- 963 00:43:45,539 --> 00:43:49,499 I mean, I suspect I could probably do damn near anything I wanted. 964 00:43:49,585 --> 00:43:51,705 [Letterman] I know… [clears throat] 965 00:43:52,630 --> 00:43:54,260 [chuckling] 966 00:43:54,340 --> 00:43:55,800 [audience clapping, cheering] 967 00:43:57,718 --> 00:44:02,768 Um, I also-- I watched a series, starring you and produced by you, 968 00:44:02,848 --> 00:44:04,388 about artificial intelligence. 969 00:44:04,475 --> 00:44:06,975 -Yes. -Now, this is under the foot… 970 00:44:07,061 --> 00:44:10,561 -[sputters] The green footprint-- -Oh, the Footprint Coalition? 971 00:44:10,648 --> 00:44:12,398 -The Footprint Coalition. -It was more-- 972 00:44:12,483 --> 00:44:15,363 I wrapped up the Marvel contract, 973 00:44:15,861 --> 00:44:20,321 and I'd been kind of around versions of AI, 974 00:44:20,407 --> 00:44:24,157 at least, you know, in my day job for over a decade. 975 00:44:24,244 --> 00:44:26,464 And then YouTube had asked us 976 00:44:26,538 --> 00:44:29,628 if we had an interest in developing this series, which we did. 977 00:44:29,708 --> 00:44:33,168 And I found it just great because it was really educational for me. 978 00:44:33,671 --> 00:44:37,091 Um, the Footprint Coalition is this whole other thing 979 00:44:37,174 --> 00:44:38,634 that I'll spend a bunch of time on. 980 00:44:38,717 --> 00:44:42,467 And what is the Footprint Coalition? That's more environmentally directed? 981 00:44:43,055 --> 00:44:45,925 Yeah. Well, one part of it is a foundation 982 00:44:46,016 --> 00:44:50,476 where you give grants to nonprofits that are doing eco-friendly stuff, 983 00:44:50,562 --> 00:44:54,482 and then the part where I'll probably wind up spending the most time is-- 984 00:44:54,566 --> 00:44:57,106 There's a kind of a media company, 985 00:44:57,611 --> 00:45:01,201 where I would want to interview people who are making inroads 986 00:45:01,281 --> 00:45:05,241 for helping clean up the planet, and taking care of our environment. 987 00:45:05,327 --> 00:45:06,867 What-- When you say taking-- 988 00:45:06,954 --> 00:45:07,834 Yeah. 989 00:45:07,913 --> 00:45:09,003 [clapping, cheering] 990 00:45:10,916 --> 00:45:13,416 Can you extend that applause indefinitely? 991 00:45:13,502 --> 00:45:15,802 I think that's gonna help me with some of my investors. 992 00:45:15,879 --> 00:45:17,629 Put a little AI into this. 993 00:45:17,715 --> 00:45:18,965 -[chuckles] -Uh… 994 00:45:19,049 --> 00:45:21,589 But I'm very pessimistic. 995 00:45:21,677 --> 00:45:23,887 Uh, I believe that the… 996 00:45:24,888 --> 00:45:28,768 Trying to stop what is-- Has-- Is too late to stop. 997 00:45:28,851 --> 00:45:32,941 I believe it's adaptability, is the only hope we have. You? 998 00:45:33,021 --> 00:45:36,571 Well, they say that the definition of an optimist 999 00:45:36,650 --> 00:45:39,110 is someone who believes the future is uncertain. 1000 00:45:40,028 --> 00:45:42,488 -Hmm. Well, there you go. Yeah. -[chuckles] 1001 00:45:42,573 --> 00:45:47,123 And a pessimist is always right, but they derive no satisfaction. 1002 00:45:47,202 --> 00:45:49,962 So, adaptability for sure, 1003 00:45:50,456 --> 00:45:54,706 but also it is just as easy 1004 00:45:54,793 --> 00:45:58,303 to try to bring folks together and get in real conversations 1005 00:45:58,380 --> 00:46:02,050 about employing technology and AI in a way 1006 00:46:02,134 --> 00:46:04,014 that can have a quantum effect on this stuff. 1007 00:46:04,094 --> 00:46:06,724 But I think you're right. We have to become more adaptive, 1008 00:46:06,805 --> 00:46:08,805 and we also have to become more synergistic. 1009 00:46:08,891 --> 00:46:11,311 I talked to a friend of mine, a very good friend of mine, 1010 00:46:11,393 --> 00:46:13,353 a guy I've known for, like, 45 years. 1011 00:46:13,437 --> 00:46:14,267 Okay. 1012 00:46:14,813 --> 00:46:18,153 He's an actor, and he worked with you. 1013 00:46:18,233 --> 00:46:19,533 His name's Tim Thomerson. 1014 00:46:19,610 --> 00:46:23,200 Tim Thomerson, the insanely gifted comedian. 1015 00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:24,700 -Yeah. -I know him well. 1016 00:46:25,240 --> 00:46:29,240 I said, "Well, what was it like working with Robert Downey Jr.?" 1017 00:46:29,328 --> 00:46:30,998 -Here's what he said. -Okay. 1018 00:46:31,079 --> 00:46:34,119 "Good guy, easy to work with, 1019 00:46:34,958 --> 00:46:36,668 generous and funny." 1020 00:46:38,045 --> 00:46:40,295 "No bullshit actor crap." 1021 00:46:40,839 --> 00:46:42,839 [audience laughing, clapping] 1022 00:46:45,761 --> 00:46:46,891 [man whistling] 1023 00:46:46,970 --> 00:46:48,180 [Robert chuckling] 1024 00:46:48,889 --> 00:46:49,929 Ah! 1025 00:46:51,308 --> 00:46:54,478 Well, we've figured out my headstone, haven't we? 1026 00:46:54,561 --> 00:46:56,441 [Letterman chuckling] 1027 00:46:57,731 --> 00:47:01,191 -Again, thank you very much for your time. -Oh, dude, it's a pleasure. 1028 00:47:01,276 --> 00:47:04,856 And as a human being, I have great regard… 1029 00:47:05,614 --> 00:47:07,244 for your accomplishments as a human being. 1030 00:47:07,324 --> 00:47:08,204 Aw, man. Thank you. 1031 00:47:08,283 --> 00:47:10,413 Robert Downey Jr., ladies and gentlemen. 1032 00:47:10,494 --> 00:47:12,294 [cheering, clapping] 1033 00:47:12,371 --> 00:47:13,211 Yeah. 1034 00:47:15,666 --> 00:47:17,286 [Letterman] Thank you very much. 1035 00:47:17,376 --> 00:47:18,876 -Not bad, right? -[man] Yeah! 1036 00:47:20,379 --> 00:47:21,209 Yeah! 1037 00:47:24,091 --> 00:47:25,591 [theme music playing]