1 00:00:04,265 --> 00:00:04,482 . 2 00:00:04,526 --> 00:00:07,224 [gentle guitar melody] 3 00:00:07,268 --> 00:00:10,706 ♪ 4 00:00:10,749 --> 00:00:12,229 - Whoa. - Mm-hmm. 5 00:00:12,273 --> 00:00:14,057 - Whoa. - Oh, hello. 6 00:00:14,101 --> 00:00:16,190 - Oh, sorry, I had the TV on pause earlier. 7 00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:18,931 - Now it's not the only thing you have on pause. 8 00:00:18,975 --> 00:00:20,542 [laughter] 9 00:00:22,370 --> 00:00:24,546 What's wrong? - Where is that thing? 10 00:00:24,589 --> 00:00:27,331 I need to turn this off. There we go. 11 00:00:29,116 --> 00:00:30,639 Hey, Martin. 12 00:00:30,682 --> 00:00:32,075 [exhales sharply] 13 00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:36,688 ♪ 14 00:00:36,732 --> 00:00:38,908 - Hey. 15 00:00:38,951 --> 00:00:41,780 I like seeing you. 16 00:00:41,824 --> 00:00:47,264 ♪ 17 00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:49,223 - Okay. - Yeah. 18 00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:53,575 - Yeah, Martin, I can't. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 19 00:00:53,618 --> 00:00:55,185 I can't. 20 00:00:55,229 --> 00:00:57,274 - You don't have to apologize. 21 00:00:59,146 --> 00:01:02,062 - I'm sorry, I just, you know. 22 00:01:03,237 --> 00:01:05,674 I love you, I just-- these issues are-- 23 00:01:05,717 --> 00:01:07,980 - I know. I said... 24 00:01:08,024 --> 00:01:10,374 you don't have to apologize. 25 00:01:11,941 --> 00:01:13,986 - [sighs] 26 00:01:14,030 --> 00:01:15,901 - I get it. 27 00:01:15,945 --> 00:01:17,816 Really. 28 00:01:17,860 --> 00:01:19,862 It's late anyway. 29 00:01:25,824 --> 00:01:27,304 [exhales deeply] 30 00:01:27,348 --> 00:01:34,485 ♪ 31 00:01:41,188 --> 00:01:43,146 - "We have seen some dark days. 32 00:01:44,408 --> 00:01:46,758 "A deadly pandemic, its epicenter right here 33 00:01:46,802 --> 00:01:48,020 "in New York City. 34 00:01:48,064 --> 00:01:50,414 "Americans dying by the thousands, 35 00:01:50,458 --> 00:01:53,852 "forced to face their fates scared and alone. 36 00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:56,290 "Sometimes it feels like the storm will never end. 37 00:01:56,333 --> 00:01:58,292 "But believe this: 38 00:01:58,335 --> 00:01:59,945 "it will end. 39 00:01:59,989 --> 00:02:02,122 You will make it end." 40 00:02:02,165 --> 00:02:04,254 Those words were written in 1985 41 00:02:04,298 --> 00:02:05,864 as this hospital faced, 42 00:02:05,908 --> 00:02:07,127 not the crisis we're in now, 43 00:02:07,170 --> 00:02:09,259 but a different one: 44 00:02:09,303 --> 00:02:10,826 the AIDS epidemic. 45 00:02:10,869 --> 00:02:16,614 So, here to honor National HIV Testing Day, 46 00:02:16,658 --> 00:02:19,791 please welcome the man who wrote those words. 47 00:02:19,835 --> 00:02:21,924 My personal hero, 48 00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:24,840 the former Medical Director of New Amsterdam, 49 00:02:24,883 --> 00:02:26,015 Dr. George Helms. 50 00:02:26,058 --> 00:02:27,973 [cheers and applause] 51 00:02:28,017 --> 00:02:29,671 - Yes! All right! 52 00:02:29,714 --> 00:02:31,455 - Whoo! 53 00:02:31,499 --> 00:02:33,153 - Thank you, Dr. Goodwin. 54 00:02:33,196 --> 00:02:35,329 [chuckling] 55 00:02:36,808 --> 00:02:39,028 I'm so proud 56 00:02:39,071 --> 00:02:42,727 to be here on a day when we offer free care 57 00:02:42,771 --> 00:02:44,294 to every HIV patient 58 00:02:44,338 --> 00:02:46,644 that has come through these doors. 59 00:02:46,688 --> 00:02:50,779 Undocumented, uninsured, under-insured. 60 00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:54,522 It's top-to-toe coverage, and it's on the house. 61 00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:58,265 [pager beeping] - Yes, amazing. 62 00:03:02,443 --> 00:03:03,835 - Luna's banned from daycare. 63 00:03:03,879 --> 00:03:05,576 - Banned? 64 00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:07,665 C-can't you just give her a detention or something? 65 00:03:07,709 --> 00:03:09,885 - I'm sorry, Max, but we take biting very seriously. 66 00:03:09,928 --> 00:03:12,235 - Biting? - Especially repeat offenders. 67 00:03:12,279 --> 00:03:13,845 - She's teething. She's not a felon. 68 00:03:13,889 --> 00:03:15,760 Look, let me come up there, and I will calm her down, 69 00:03:15,804 --> 00:03:17,762 and then you can give her a second chance. 70 00:03:17,806 --> 00:03:18,937 - We've given her three. 71 00:03:18,981 --> 00:03:20,287 - [quietly] Three? 72 00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:21,505 - Is any family around? 73 00:03:21,549 --> 00:03:23,420 - My in-laws, but, uh, 74 00:03:23,464 --> 00:03:24,508 you know what our hours are like. 75 00:03:24,552 --> 00:03:27,250 If she's not here, I'm never gonna-- 76 00:03:27,294 --> 00:03:28,556 I'm never gonna see her. 77 00:03:30,601 --> 00:03:33,125 Marsha, I don't have a plan B. 78 00:03:33,169 --> 00:03:34,518 - Neither do I, Max. I'm sorry. 79 00:03:34,562 --> 00:03:35,954 I'll bring up Luna. 80 00:03:35,998 --> 00:03:38,870 [quiet emotional music] 81 00:03:38,914 --> 00:03:40,394 - [sighs] 82 00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:43,092 [upbeat Indian music playing] 83 00:03:43,135 --> 00:03:44,659 - Ig, Ig, look. 84 00:03:44,702 --> 00:03:46,965 I told Casey I'd be out of the E.D. for like, ten minutes. 85 00:03:47,009 --> 00:03:48,358 - Yeah, no, any second now he's gonna 86 00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:49,968 walk through that door and his sweet smile's 87 00:03:50,012 --> 00:03:51,840 gonna light up that perfectly round bald head of his, kay? 88 00:03:51,883 --> 00:03:52,971 [door opens] 89 00:03:53,015 --> 00:03:54,669 - Surprise! 90 00:03:54,712 --> 00:03:55,800 - Shut the door, shut the-- 91 00:03:55,844 --> 00:03:57,280 - He's not here yet? - Nope, nope. 92 00:03:57,324 --> 00:03:58,542 Ig, look, I really got to go. 93 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:00,109 - Fudge. No, no, no. 94 00:04:00,152 --> 00:04:01,589 Let me text Ella one more time. Don't--don't eat those. 95 00:04:01,632 --> 00:04:03,155 - Say hi for me. - Um, you know what? 96 00:04:03,199 --> 00:04:04,722 Actually I just wanted to pop my head in real quick, 97 00:04:04,766 --> 00:04:05,941 and I got to get back to work. - Wait, wait, guys. 98 00:04:05,984 --> 00:04:07,769 Have you forgotten that he almost died? 99 00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:09,684 Okay, he had COVID, he had open heart surgery, 100 00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:11,294 then he battled through a hellish rehab. 101 00:04:11,338 --> 00:04:12,730 Now today, our friend is coming back here 102 00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:14,341 and I want to celebrate him for ten minutes 103 00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:15,516 of your time, please. [door opens] 104 00:04:15,559 --> 00:04:16,647 - Surprise! - Aah! 105 00:04:16,691 --> 00:04:17,779 - Shoot! - Sorry I'm late, 106 00:04:17,822 --> 00:04:19,259 I was working on my toast. - Agnes-- 107 00:04:19,302 --> 00:04:20,738 - What, he's not here yet? - No. 108 00:04:20,782 --> 00:04:21,913 - Yeah, you know what? Give him my love. 109 00:04:21,957 --> 00:04:23,480 - Just give him my love. - C'mon, Floyd-- 110 00:04:23,524 --> 00:04:24,742 - Just tell him to come into the E.D. and say hey. 111 00:04:24,786 --> 00:04:26,570 Oh, Brunstetter, you're back on too. 112 00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:28,093 - Let me grab one more of these pastry things, 113 00:04:28,137 --> 00:04:29,878 and then I am right behind you. - They're called laddu 114 00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,314 and they're decorative, Brunstetter. 115 00:04:31,358 --> 00:04:33,011 God, what is wrong with you people? 116 00:04:33,055 --> 00:04:36,406 Ten minutes! Guys, ten min-- shut the door, at least. 117 00:04:36,450 --> 00:04:38,321 Just-- [door closes] 118 00:04:38,365 --> 00:04:40,236 Great, now it says "Kapoop." 119 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,412 - And then you start placing one on each of the seats. 120 00:04:42,456 --> 00:04:44,284 Oh, and please don't forget the pens, okay? 121 00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:46,111 Thank you. 122 00:04:46,155 --> 00:04:48,331 - Uh, why are you all jittery? 123 00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:50,115 - Because we're about to be hit 124 00:04:50,159 --> 00:04:51,726 with an influx of HIV patients, 125 00:04:51,769 --> 00:04:53,293 and with 6 feet between each chair, 126 00:04:53,336 --> 00:04:55,338 I'm not sure we have enough hallway to accommodate them. 127 00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:57,122 - No, you know what? This feels more like 128 00:04:57,166 --> 00:04:58,428 the kind of freak-out you have 129 00:04:58,472 --> 00:05:01,388 when you're 24 hours away from becoming a mum. 130 00:05:01,431 --> 00:05:03,259 - Yes, Mina is coming tomorrow 131 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,130 but I'm not her mum, I'm her aunt. 132 00:05:05,174 --> 00:05:07,568 And a cool aunt doesn't freak out, thank you. 133 00:05:07,611 --> 00:05:09,570 - Uh, she's a 16-year-old girl. 134 00:05:09,613 --> 00:05:11,789 You're never gonna be a cool anything. 135 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,748 - Oh, shush. I just mean I'm gonna provide 136 00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:15,750 a calm, accepting environment. 137 00:05:15,793 --> 00:05:18,361 My role isn't to control her life, it's to follow her lead. 138 00:05:18,405 --> 00:05:19,797 And whatever may come, this cool aunt 139 00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,321 is just gonna roll with it. - Ammeh Helen? 140 00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:24,280 [quiet plucky music] 141 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,542 ♪ 142 00:05:25,586 --> 00:05:27,283 - Mina. I'm-- 143 00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,416 - [chuckles] 144 00:05:29,459 --> 00:05:31,505 - I thought that you were coming tomorrow. 145 00:05:31,548 --> 00:05:33,811 - I flew standby. I thought I'd surprise you. 146 00:05:33,855 --> 00:05:35,378 - Hi. 147 00:05:35,422 --> 00:05:38,076 - Um, yes, yes, you did. I just, um-- 148 00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:41,776 Oh! I just wish you'd called. [chuckles] 149 00:05:44,474 --> 00:05:46,041 - I don't believe it. - Believe it. 150 00:05:46,084 --> 00:05:48,478 Full refund from the venue and from the caterer. 151 00:05:48,522 --> 00:05:50,480 - Damn. What'd you have to do to pull that off? 152 00:05:50,524 --> 00:05:51,960 - I played the 153 00:05:52,003 --> 00:05:54,354 "His mom has diabetes and he broke" card. 154 00:05:54,397 --> 00:05:56,181 - I'm not broke. - [laughing] 155 00:05:56,225 --> 00:05:58,706 Just say thank you, Floyd. - Oh, I thank you. 156 00:05:58,749 --> 00:06:01,883 So what's left on the cancelled wedding checklist? 157 00:06:01,926 --> 00:06:03,101 - Nothing. 158 00:06:03,145 --> 00:06:04,842 All our business is officially handled. 159 00:06:04,886 --> 00:06:06,888 We're done. - Good, all right. 160 00:06:09,151 --> 00:06:11,414 - How's Mama Nola? - Mama Nola's good. 161 00:06:11,458 --> 00:06:14,069 Yeah, she's, uh, she's good. 162 00:06:14,112 --> 00:06:15,375 - And what about Floyd? 163 00:06:15,418 --> 00:06:16,941 Is he good? 164 00:06:16,985 --> 00:06:18,856 - Uh... 165 00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:20,641 [door opens] - Incoming. 166 00:06:20,684 --> 00:06:21,816 - Oh, uh, Evie, we got incoming. 167 00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:23,731 I got to go. - Go do your thing. 168 00:06:23,774 --> 00:06:26,342 - Kwame Adu. Passed out at HIV testing upstairs. 169 00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,213 Pulse 140 and thready. 170 00:06:28,257 --> 00:06:29,606 - Kwame, I'm Dr. Bloom. 171 00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:31,521 You're in New Amsterdam E.D. We're gonna take 172 00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:32,957 good care of you, okay? - Okay. 173 00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:34,306 - Okay, let's get him on the bed. 174 00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:36,439 - Take a look at these. - Okay, nice and easy. 175 00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:37,919 - Okay. - Nice and easy. 176 00:06:39,224 --> 00:06:40,791 - Hey, Kwame. - Yes? 177 00:06:40,835 --> 00:06:43,315 - We got the results from the HIV test you just took. 178 00:06:43,359 --> 00:06:44,926 - Uh-huh. - It's positive. 179 00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,539 - No. 180 00:06:49,583 --> 00:06:52,412 No, that--that can't be true. 181 00:06:52,455 --> 00:06:55,632 - Kwame, I'm sure it's not the result that you wanted, 182 00:06:55,676 --> 00:06:58,243 but HIV isn't a death sentence anymore. 183 00:06:58,287 --> 00:06:59,723 It's manageable. 184 00:06:59,767 --> 00:07:01,682 - This can't be happening. - Hey, hey, hey. 185 00:07:01,725 --> 00:07:03,597 Look, just take it easy, all right? 186 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:05,120 - That test is wrong. 187 00:07:05,163 --> 00:07:07,165 - Okay, but the results also say that 188 00:07:07,209 --> 00:07:08,558 your pancreas is damaged. 189 00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:09,907 That's why you're sick, all right? 190 00:07:09,951 --> 00:07:12,780 You just need to relax. - That test is wrong! 191 00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:14,695 - Okay-- - Okay? Okay? 192 00:07:14,738 --> 00:07:17,437 - Just--Kwame, Kwame, just have a seat right here. 193 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,742 Kwame! - [gasping] 194 00:07:18,786 --> 00:07:20,614 - If you don't get treatment, you could die. 195 00:07:20,657 --> 00:07:22,050 - Okay, let him go, okay? 196 00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:23,747 You can't keep him here against his will. 197 00:07:23,791 --> 00:07:25,270 - His pancreas is gonna explode. 198 00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:26,707 - Then he's gonna be back. 199 00:07:26,750 --> 00:07:28,491 Mariana, get Trauma room one 200 00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:30,145 ready for an acute pancreatitis. 201 00:07:30,188 --> 00:07:31,233 - Yes. 202 00:07:33,148 --> 00:07:34,236 - Uh, look out. 203 00:07:34,279 --> 00:07:35,759 Oh, no, sorry about that. 204 00:07:35,803 --> 00:07:37,413 Hey. Hey, hey, Luna. 205 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,850 Running from Dada is a bad, bad move. 206 00:07:39,894 --> 00:07:41,591 It's not very good, okay? If you keep doing it, 207 00:07:41,635 --> 00:07:42,897 you're gonna be on time out. [crashing] 208 00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:45,552 Hey, that's just the way the world works. 209 00:07:45,595 --> 00:07:47,423 Come here. There are rules. 210 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:50,208 And we got to follow the rules, okay? 211 00:07:50,252 --> 00:07:51,471 And when people do bad things, 212 00:07:51,514 --> 00:07:53,211 they don't just get to-- 213 00:07:53,255 --> 00:07:55,823 to get away with it. 214 00:07:55,866 --> 00:07:59,000 [punchy drum solo] 215 00:07:59,043 --> 00:08:03,526 ♪ 216 00:08:06,747 --> 00:08:07,182 . 217 00:08:07,225 --> 00:08:10,228 - Dr. Val! Uh, any word on the blood bank records? 218 00:08:10,272 --> 00:08:11,360 - Yeah, here you go. 219 00:08:11,403 --> 00:08:12,796 All we got on Howie Cournemeyer. 220 00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:14,232 Interesting stuff. 221 00:08:14,276 --> 00:08:15,451 Cute kid. - Yeah, she is. 222 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,105 Until she gnaws your face off. 223 00:08:17,148 --> 00:08:19,716 Howie Cournemeyer donated blood in 1986. 224 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,805 This is interesting why? - Oh, it's much less the when 225 00:08:21,849 --> 00:08:23,285 than the how much. 226 00:08:23,328 --> 00:08:25,548 - A thousand pints in a month? What, is he a whale? 227 00:08:25,592 --> 00:08:28,333 His blood type keeps changing. Sometimes in a single day. 228 00:08:28,377 --> 00:08:29,813 - Oh, yeah, that whole thing's total B.S. 229 00:08:29,857 --> 00:08:32,599 - Not sure how it'll help you catch a vandal though. 230 00:08:32,642 --> 00:08:34,949 - Okay, check this out. His blood type changes, 231 00:08:34,992 --> 00:08:38,300 but his address stays the same on almost every donation. 232 00:08:38,343 --> 00:08:39,780 - Max with the detective skills. 233 00:08:39,823 --> 00:08:42,478 - Well, it's all about keen skills of observation. 234 00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:45,133 - Like I'm observing your kid eating a plant? 235 00:08:45,176 --> 00:08:46,961 - Hey, um... - Hey. 236 00:08:47,004 --> 00:08:48,484 What if I started chewing on you? 237 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:51,139 - That's enough plant-based eating for one day. 238 00:08:51,182 --> 00:08:53,968 Okay, come here. So we are daycare-less. 239 00:08:54,011 --> 00:08:57,319 And, uh, recent development, we don't have a plan B. 240 00:08:57,362 --> 00:08:58,668 - Great story. Sign these. 241 00:08:58,712 --> 00:09:01,149 - Um, you love kids. - Very much the opposite. 242 00:09:01,192 --> 00:09:02,542 - Right. Let me rephrase that. 243 00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,761 You love being my assistant, right? 244 00:09:04,805 --> 00:09:06,589 - Yes, it's my childhood dream come true. 245 00:09:06,633 --> 00:09:09,592 - We would love to hang out with you, Sandra. 246 00:09:09,636 --> 00:09:11,420 'Cause you're so cool. - No. 247 00:09:11,463 --> 00:09:13,509 - Really? Please? I'm begging you. 248 00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:15,729 - Kay, try cash. - Yeah, okay. I'll pay you. 249 00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:18,470 Double? Triple. Quadruple. Whatever it takes. 250 00:09:18,514 --> 00:09:20,037 Please. Please take my baby. 251 00:09:20,081 --> 00:09:21,517 You're the best. - What? 252 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:22,953 - She's the sweetest thing in the world. 253 00:09:22,997 --> 00:09:24,955 Watch out, she does bite sometimes. 254 00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:26,740 Don't drop her. Food, water. - I've-- 255 00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:28,829 [upbeat music] 256 00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:30,047 Hello. 257 00:09:33,181 --> 00:09:34,617 - So sorry. I'm sure this isn't 258 00:09:34,661 --> 00:09:39,622 how you imagined spending your first day in America. 259 00:09:39,666 --> 00:09:43,147 But I-I have a patient who's in rough shape 260 00:09:43,191 --> 00:09:45,410 so if you need me, I'll be in the Oncology-- 261 00:09:45,454 --> 00:09:48,718 - [chuckles] - What's--what's funny? 262 00:09:49,806 --> 00:09:52,722 - I'm sorry. 263 00:09:52,766 --> 00:09:53,723 It's just like watching 264 00:09:53,767 --> 00:09:56,204 Dr. Helen on TV. - Ah. 265 00:09:56,247 --> 00:09:59,207 - My father would watch you sometimes, and... 266 00:09:59,250 --> 00:10:01,688 he'd say, "Look, that's your Ammeh." 267 00:10:01,731 --> 00:10:03,385 But it just felt so odd. 268 00:10:03,428 --> 00:10:06,083 Like if he said my Amoo was 269 00:10:06,127 --> 00:10:08,129 Ryan Seacrest or something. 270 00:10:10,044 --> 00:10:13,003 - Uh, well. Look, if, um, 271 00:10:13,047 --> 00:10:16,528 if it feels odd, 272 00:10:16,572 --> 00:10:19,706 calling me "ammeh," then, um, 273 00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:21,272 p-please don't. 274 00:10:21,316 --> 00:10:22,578 - But that would be disrespectful. 275 00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,841 - No, no, no. No, I'm asking you to. 276 00:10:24,885 --> 00:10:27,061 Um, I should be more like your 277 00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:30,020 big sister or your friend. 278 00:10:30,064 --> 00:10:32,588 Your friend Helen. 279 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:33,894 That's what you should call me. 280 00:10:33,937 --> 00:10:35,939 Just Helen. 281 00:10:35,983 --> 00:10:37,506 - "Just Helen," 282 00:10:37,549 --> 00:10:40,727 I know it's rude to be so direct, 283 00:10:40,770 --> 00:10:43,077 but can I get some tea? 284 00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:45,296 - Oh, yes. 285 00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:48,560 Um, course. You don't even have to ask. 286 00:10:48,604 --> 00:10:50,780 The cafeteria's on the fourth floor. 287 00:10:50,824 --> 00:10:53,087 - Cool. - Yeah. 288 00:10:53,130 --> 00:10:54,915 It is cool. [chuckles] 289 00:10:54,958 --> 00:10:58,440 - Hi, yes, I am in desperate need of a nanny, 290 00:10:58,483 --> 00:11:00,398 and I heard you guys are the best agency around. 291 00:11:00,442 --> 00:11:01,922 No, thank you. 292 00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:03,924 Well, I'm looking for someone in the mid-town area. 293 00:11:03,967 --> 00:11:06,753 Uh, let's see, teaching experience is a must. 294 00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:08,145 Bilingual is great. 295 00:11:08,189 --> 00:11:10,191 Trilingual is better. 296 00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:12,541 Uh, what else? CPR certified, obviously. 297 00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:15,283 And, uh, oh! Like a wizard with vegetables. 298 00:11:15,326 --> 00:11:17,938 I mean an actual wizard. 299 00:11:17,981 --> 00:11:19,940 [buzzer sounds] 300 00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:21,376 Great. 301 00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:22,769 Oh, that's great. Yeah, that's amazing. 302 00:11:22,812 --> 00:11:26,294 Um, um, starting tomorrow, if you have it. 303 00:11:27,861 --> 00:11:29,079 [chuckles] 304 00:11:29,123 --> 00:11:32,126 What--when you say "ten-month waiting list," 305 00:11:32,169 --> 00:11:36,217 do you mean actual months or is that a figure of speech? 306 00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:39,699 - Yeah? 307 00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:41,483 - I'm gonna have to call you back. 308 00:11:41,526 --> 00:11:44,616 Hi, are you Howie Cournemeyer? 309 00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:46,444 - Yeah. - I'm Max Goodwin, 310 00:11:46,488 --> 00:11:48,011 medical director at New Amsterdam. 311 00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:51,275 - I knew you bastards would come for me one day. 312 00:11:55,366 --> 00:11:56,585 - I walk in this morning with HIV, 313 00:11:56,628 --> 00:11:58,282 and now I have cancer, too? [chuckles dryly] 314 00:11:58,326 --> 00:12:00,284 I mean this can't be happening. I can't even pronounce it. 315 00:12:00,328 --> 00:12:02,199 - Hemangiosarcoma. 316 00:12:02,243 --> 00:12:03,766 And we don't know for certain that's what you have. 317 00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:05,420 - Okay, then what do you think I do? 318 00:12:05,463 --> 00:12:07,161 I mean, you just found a lump. That could be anything, right? 319 00:12:07,204 --> 00:12:11,339 - Hemangiosarcoma often occurs when HIV goes undertreated. 320 00:12:11,382 --> 00:12:14,472 We won't know anything for sure until your MRI. 321 00:12:14,516 --> 00:12:16,605 - HIV is not supposed to be a big deal anymore. 322 00:12:16,648 --> 00:12:17,954 I mean, I've been on my cocktail for years 323 00:12:17,998 --> 00:12:19,782 and I've been fine. Now I miss a few check-ups 324 00:12:19,826 --> 00:12:23,351 and I might die? -Let's not jump to conclusions. 325 00:12:23,394 --> 00:12:25,919 - [coughs] 326 00:12:25,962 --> 00:12:27,834 Oh, my God, what's happening? 327 00:12:27,877 --> 00:12:29,879 - Okay, can somebody help please? 328 00:12:29,923 --> 00:12:31,707 Get her to the E.D.! [elevator bell dings] 329 00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:36,712 - He's back. No pulse. 330 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,192 They found him in a parking lot. 331 00:12:38,235 --> 00:12:39,541 - V-TACH. Charging at 360. 332 00:12:39,584 --> 00:12:41,282 - Shockable rhythm present. 333 00:12:41,325 --> 00:12:44,372 [AED charging] 334 00:12:44,415 --> 00:12:45,590 Clear. - Clear. 335 00:12:45,634 --> 00:12:47,027 - Shocking. [click] 336 00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:48,637 [monitor beeping] 337 00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:51,292 - Screen for [murmurs]. 338 00:12:51,335 --> 00:12:53,729 - Airway is patent. [beeping slows] 339 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:54,861 - He's back. 340 00:12:54,904 --> 00:12:57,211 Normal sinus rhythm. - Pulse ox, 97. 341 00:12:57,254 --> 00:12:59,082 [door slams open] - Kwame. 342 00:12:59,126 --> 00:13:00,736 - Whoa, whoa. Hey, hey! - Are you all right? 343 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,694 - No, out. You need to be out. - I'm responsible for him. 344 00:13:02,738 --> 00:13:04,000 - You don't have a mask! - I'm the president of 345 00:13:04,044 --> 00:13:05,306 his mission for the Church of Jesus Christ. 346 00:13:05,349 --> 00:13:08,309 - Elder Shumway. - It's gonna be okay. 347 00:13:08,352 --> 00:13:09,614 I'm here. 348 00:13:09,658 --> 00:13:11,399 - I'll get the lidocaine drip ready. 349 00:13:11,442 --> 00:13:12,574 - Tell me what happened. 350 00:13:16,143 --> 00:13:18,014 - I can't. 351 00:13:18,058 --> 00:13:20,887 - You can tell me anything. 352 00:13:20,930 --> 00:13:21,931 Remember? 353 00:13:24,107 --> 00:13:25,326 - I was... 354 00:13:28,895 --> 00:13:31,288 with a man. 355 00:13:37,468 --> 00:13:39,557 I have HIV. 356 00:13:45,085 --> 00:13:47,565 Please don't send me back. 357 00:13:47,609 --> 00:13:49,045 I want to finish my mission. 358 00:13:49,089 --> 00:13:52,614 The Church is all I have. God is all I have. 359 00:13:52,657 --> 00:13:55,356 - Then why did you turn your back on Him? 360 00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:59,012 Your mission is over. 361 00:14:01,971 --> 00:14:04,887 - Elder Shumway, please. 362 00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:07,368 Please! Please. 363 00:14:07,411 --> 00:14:09,674 - [whispers] Hey, it's okay, it's okay. 364 00:14:12,329 --> 00:14:14,984 - Vijay! Oh, hey. 365 00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:21,251 What's up? What's wrong? 366 00:14:21,295 --> 00:14:23,079 - He's not coming. 367 00:14:23,123 --> 00:14:25,603 - No, I don't know. He probably just forgot his glasses 368 00:14:25,647 --> 00:14:27,214 and he headed back to get them-- 369 00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:29,346 - I just got an email. 370 00:14:29,390 --> 00:14:31,696 The whole neurology department did. 371 00:14:31,740 --> 00:14:33,873 Dr. Kapoor just resigned. 372 00:14:38,747 --> 00:14:40,662 He's not coming back. 373 00:14:42,794 --> 00:14:44,535 Ever. 374 00:14:44,579 --> 00:14:47,451 [upbeat folksy music in background] 375 00:14:47,495 --> 00:14:54,067 ♪ 376 00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:56,983 . 377 00:14:57,026 --> 00:14:59,159 - Okay, here's what I think is happening. 378 00:14:59,202 --> 00:14:59,942 I think you're embarrassed because 379 00:14:59,986 --> 00:15:01,683 you and I talk every day. 380 00:15:01,726 --> 00:15:04,599 And now you're worried that I'm gonna be mad 381 00:15:04,642 --> 00:15:07,080 because you've been lying to me literally the entire time. 382 00:15:07,123 --> 00:15:08,820 But I'm not. I'm not mad. 383 00:15:08,864 --> 00:15:10,518 I know that you have one of those 384 00:15:10,561 --> 00:15:13,303 ancient answering machines that you can actually hear me 385 00:15:13,347 --> 00:15:14,826 leaving a message for you right now. 386 00:15:14,870 --> 00:15:16,828 You can hear me talking. So just pick up. 387 00:15:16,872 --> 00:15:18,265 I'm not mad, I swear I'm not mad. 388 00:15:18,308 --> 00:15:19,353 [line beeps] 389 00:15:20,876 --> 00:15:22,182 Okay, you know what? I am mad. 390 00:15:22,225 --> 00:15:24,010 I'm pissed. I'm furious with you 391 00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:25,620 because I'm your best friend. 392 00:15:25,663 --> 00:15:27,535 You told the entire neurology department 393 00:15:27,578 --> 00:15:29,537 that you were resigning before you told me. 394 00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:30,755 Y-you still haven't told me 395 00:15:30,799 --> 00:15:33,062 because you won't pick up the phone! 396 00:15:33,106 --> 00:15:34,672 Pick up the phone, Vijay! 397 00:15:34,716 --> 00:15:36,109 [line beeps] 398 00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:38,241 Do you want to know where I was when 399 00:15:38,285 --> 00:15:39,547 I heard your little announcement? 400 00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:42,376 I was at your surprise party. Surprise! 401 00:15:42,419 --> 00:15:44,160 I planned you a party that you didn't show up to. 402 00:15:44,204 --> 00:15:46,336 And you know, I don't-- I don't deserve this. 403 00:15:46,380 --> 00:15:47,990 Vijay, I do not deserve this. 404 00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:50,297 Unless I'm just your deluded work friend 405 00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:52,342 who's been putting himself on for years. 406 00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:53,691 In that case, by all means-- [line beeps] 407 00:15:53,735 --> 00:15:55,041 Oh, n-- 408 00:15:56,694 --> 00:15:57,826 [groans] 409 00:15:57,869 --> 00:16:00,437 - [loud slurping] 410 00:16:01,786 --> 00:16:04,180 Oops. I forgot yours. 411 00:16:04,224 --> 00:16:07,053 - Um, Mr. Cournemeyer. 412 00:16:07,096 --> 00:16:08,315 Howie, listen-- 413 00:16:08,358 --> 00:16:10,012 - No, you listen. I'm not scared of you. 414 00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:12,014 I knew what I was doing was against the law. 415 00:16:12,058 --> 00:16:13,276 That was the point. 416 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,104 You're way too young to remember any of this. 417 00:16:15,148 --> 00:16:17,367 But back in the '80s, at the height of AIDS? 418 00:16:17,411 --> 00:16:19,369 The healthcare industry failed its patients. 419 00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:21,893 New Amsterdam failed its patients. 420 00:16:21,937 --> 00:16:23,504 Gay men were treated like lepers. 421 00:16:23,547 --> 00:16:25,985 Your nurses wouldn't even touch friends of mine with AIDS. 422 00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,899 Just left them alone in the corners to die. 423 00:16:27,943 --> 00:16:29,379 - Let me assure you-- 424 00:16:29,423 --> 00:16:31,338 - Big pharma? Boy, do not get me started-- 425 00:16:31,381 --> 00:16:32,817 - I think that train's left the station. 426 00:16:32,861 --> 00:16:34,558 - Big pharma profiteered 427 00:16:34,602 --> 00:16:37,257 off the gay community's desperation to survive. 428 00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:39,607 So I decided to fight on behalf of those who had it. 429 00:16:39,650 --> 00:16:42,305 I became an activist. Then I joined ACT UP. 430 00:16:42,349 --> 00:16:43,741 And we did what we had to do. 431 00:16:43,785 --> 00:16:46,005 To make things right, to make some noise. 432 00:16:46,048 --> 00:16:47,745 And, so, yeah. 433 00:16:47,789 --> 00:16:50,052 That's why I stole the New Amsterdam seal. 434 00:16:50,096 --> 00:16:53,012 And why I encased it in a gigantic condom. 435 00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:55,057 And no, I will never give it back. 436 00:16:57,233 --> 00:16:59,235 - Wow, that's, uh, 437 00:16:59,279 --> 00:17:00,976 impressive, actually. 438 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,760 But not why I'm here. 439 00:17:02,804 --> 00:17:04,110 - No. 440 00:17:04,153 --> 00:17:06,982 Not for the...big condom. 441 00:17:08,810 --> 00:17:13,293 - Uh, Mr. Cournemeyer, I came here to ask you 442 00:17:13,336 --> 00:17:14,598 how, 443 00:17:14,642 --> 00:17:17,166 in March of '86, you orchestrated a scheme 444 00:17:17,210 --> 00:17:20,213 to donate a thousand pints of blood under your name? 445 00:17:20,256 --> 00:17:22,345 - What? I would never have 446 00:17:22,389 --> 00:17:25,740 donated a single drop of my blood to your hospital, 447 00:17:25,783 --> 00:17:26,915 even to make a point. 448 00:17:26,958 --> 00:17:28,308 - But then why is your name-- 449 00:17:28,351 --> 00:17:32,138 - Come to think of it, March of '86, I was in jail. 450 00:17:32,181 --> 00:17:36,055 I demanded a coordinated national policy to fight AIDS 451 00:17:36,098 --> 00:17:38,448 by chaining myself to the Statehouse doors. 452 00:17:38,492 --> 00:17:39,971 They heard me. 453 00:17:40,015 --> 00:17:41,190 - In jail. 454 00:17:41,234 --> 00:17:43,149 - Wrong guy, Doc. 455 00:17:44,976 --> 00:17:46,500 [alarms beeping] 456 00:17:46,543 --> 00:17:47,414 - Esophageal? 457 00:17:47,457 --> 00:17:49,764 - No negative interactions. 458 00:17:50,982 --> 00:17:52,332 - I'm thinking variceal bleeding, 459 00:17:52,375 --> 00:17:53,811 likely from liver cancer. 460 00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:55,117 [alarms beeping] 461 00:17:55,161 --> 00:17:57,467 BP's dropping. Have you got that tube in yet? 462 00:17:57,511 --> 00:17:59,295 - I'm trying. - STEMI ruled out at this time. 463 00:17:59,339 --> 00:18:01,645 - Looks a bit more distal. 464 00:18:01,689 --> 00:18:03,386 - About 2 centimeters should do it. 465 00:18:03,430 --> 00:18:05,867 Right... [indistinct chatter] 466 00:18:05,910 --> 00:18:08,565 there. - Got it? 467 00:18:08,609 --> 00:18:10,089 - I think so. 468 00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:12,265 We should know once the bleeding stops. 469 00:18:12,308 --> 00:18:14,005 [alarm silences] - It's good for now. 470 00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:17,008 Fingers crossed that it holds. 471 00:18:17,052 --> 00:18:19,750 - How did she let herself get so bad? 472 00:18:19,794 --> 00:18:22,492 - Because apparently "HIV isn't scary anymore." 473 00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,713 - Yeah, I guess some people need to be scared. 474 00:18:29,151 --> 00:18:30,631 - Have a seat. 475 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:36,811 I can't tell you about faith. 476 00:18:36,854 --> 00:18:39,030 But I saw what your Elder did. 477 00:18:39,074 --> 00:18:41,685 You shouldn't have to repent to someone who abandoned you 478 00:18:41,729 --> 00:18:44,514 at a time when you needed him the most. 479 00:18:44,558 --> 00:18:48,301 - Elder Shumway loves me like a father. 480 00:18:48,344 --> 00:18:51,086 He knew I was gay. 481 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:54,437 He treated me with grace and acceptance. 482 00:18:54,481 --> 00:18:57,571 All he asked of me was to not act on my desires. 483 00:18:58,876 --> 00:19:01,705 He did not turn his back. 484 00:19:01,749 --> 00:19:03,707 I did. 485 00:19:03,751 --> 00:19:06,884 I threw God away. 486 00:19:06,928 --> 00:19:09,539 And this disease, 487 00:19:09,583 --> 00:19:12,542 it means I will never get God back. 488 00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:21,725 Is there a pill? 489 00:19:21,769 --> 00:19:22,900 A surgery? 490 00:19:22,944 --> 00:19:24,598 Anything to scrape these 491 00:19:24,641 --> 00:19:26,208 disgusting urges out of my body? 492 00:19:26,252 --> 00:19:27,731 - Kwame, Kwame. 493 00:19:29,690 --> 00:19:31,300 Brother, this is not disgusting. 494 00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:33,781 This is who you are. 495 00:19:33,824 --> 00:19:34,738 - [scoffs quietly] 496 00:19:37,741 --> 00:19:40,701 Sex is not who I am. 497 00:19:40,744 --> 00:19:43,094 I am my community. 498 00:19:43,138 --> 00:19:44,966 My family, my faith. 499 00:19:45,009 --> 00:19:46,446 I am an Elder 500 00:19:46,489 --> 00:19:50,189 in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. 501 00:19:50,232 --> 00:19:52,016 That is who I am. 502 00:19:52,060 --> 00:19:54,410 - That is not that simple. 503 00:19:54,454 --> 00:19:56,760 - But it is that simple. 504 00:19:56,804 --> 00:19:58,501 Think of the one thing 505 00:19:58,545 --> 00:20:00,764 you can't live without. 506 00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:08,468 That is who you are. 507 00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:15,039 - Well, so I gave it some thought, 508 00:20:15,083 --> 00:20:16,345 and I realized I was being 509 00:20:16,389 --> 00:20:18,260 way too stringent with the nanny requirements, 510 00:20:18,304 --> 00:20:20,044 so here's what I'm looking for now. 511 00:20:20,088 --> 00:20:23,613 Anyone. I will take anyone. Do you--do you have anyone? 512 00:20:23,657 --> 00:20:25,441 Dr. Val! Ma'am, I will take 513 00:20:25,485 --> 00:20:27,400 a well-trained Saint Bernard at this point. 514 00:20:27,443 --> 00:20:28,705 Okay, thank you very much. 515 00:20:28,749 --> 00:20:31,317 So Howie couldn't really shed any light. 516 00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:34,102 He did have a giant condom situation. 517 00:20:34,145 --> 00:20:35,451 Not really sure what that's about, 518 00:20:35,495 --> 00:20:36,974 but I'll deal with that tomorrow. 519 00:20:37,018 --> 00:20:38,280 - Makes sense. - Does it? 520 00:20:38,324 --> 00:20:40,326 I need to track down the head 521 00:20:40,369 --> 00:20:43,242 of the blood bank from 1986, and problem is, 522 00:20:43,285 --> 00:20:45,331 his information on his W-2 is outdated, 523 00:20:45,374 --> 00:20:47,158 so I was wondering if you could ask the older staff. 524 00:20:47,202 --> 00:20:48,377 Maybe they know him? 525 00:20:48,421 --> 00:20:49,857 - Oh, yeah, sure thing. What's the name? 526 00:20:49,900 --> 00:20:51,598 - Uh, Dale Rustin. 527 00:20:51,641 --> 00:20:53,469 - You sure? - Yeah, why? You know him? 528 00:20:53,513 --> 00:20:55,732 - No, but the whole blood bank's been talking about him. 529 00:20:55,776 --> 00:20:58,257 He's upstairs. - He still works here? 530 00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:00,389 - No, he's a patient. He's dying. 531 00:21:05,655 --> 00:21:07,527 - I'm sorry about that last phone call. 532 00:21:07,570 --> 00:21:10,356 Um, I didn't mean to dump all that on you. 533 00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:16,275 I love you, and I hope that you are okay. 534 00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:21,628 But I gotta draw a boundary here, Vijay. 535 00:21:24,892 --> 00:21:28,025 You need to pick up the phone, right now, 536 00:21:28,069 --> 00:21:33,509 or you and I can't ever be 537 00:21:33,553 --> 00:21:36,469 the same kind of friends anymore. 538 00:21:36,512 --> 00:21:37,644 At all, really. 539 00:21:44,912 --> 00:21:46,783 So pick up the phone. 540 00:21:53,877 --> 00:21:55,749 Pick up the phone, Vijay. 541 00:21:58,099 --> 00:22:00,275 [line beeps] 542 00:22:02,756 --> 00:22:03,713 [call ends] 543 00:22:05,846 --> 00:22:07,282 [sighs deeply] 544 00:22:12,983 --> 00:22:13,201 . 545 00:22:13,244 --> 00:22:17,031 - Stage III Astrocytoma. 546 00:22:18,467 --> 00:22:19,903 I'm sorry to hear that. 547 00:22:22,210 --> 00:22:25,344 "New Amsterdam. Shame then, shame now." 548 00:22:27,128 --> 00:22:30,261 You wouldn't know anything about that, would you? 549 00:22:33,439 --> 00:22:38,705 - I had worse things to say about Medical Director Helms, 550 00:22:38,748 --> 00:22:41,838 but kids do use that hallway. 551 00:22:41,882 --> 00:22:44,363 - Dr. Helms is a pillar of this hospital. 552 00:22:44,406 --> 00:22:47,322 - [scoffs] 553 00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:48,454 - So you don't want to explain yourself? 554 00:22:48,497 --> 00:22:50,194 You just want to slander him anonymously? 555 00:22:50,238 --> 00:22:52,893 - I'd slander him to his face 556 00:22:52,936 --> 00:22:55,548 if I thought anybody would care. 557 00:22:55,591 --> 00:22:57,941 - Try me. 558 00:23:00,422 --> 00:23:05,558 - In 1986, this hospital needed blood. 559 00:23:05,601 --> 00:23:08,038 As so many did. 560 00:23:11,477 --> 00:23:15,263 But sexually active gay men 561 00:23:15,306 --> 00:23:18,179 were banned from donating it in this country, 562 00:23:18,222 --> 00:23:22,531 even if they knew they were HIV-negative. 563 00:23:22,575 --> 00:23:23,880 - That's not Helms' fault. 564 00:23:23,924 --> 00:23:25,969 It's... [sighs] 565 00:23:26,013 --> 00:23:27,101 it's the way the world was then. 566 00:23:27,144 --> 00:23:29,233 - Gay men can't donate 567 00:23:29,277 --> 00:23:33,412 convalescent plasma for COVID right now. 568 00:23:33,455 --> 00:23:35,414 So you tell me, 569 00:23:35,457 --> 00:23:38,373 what exactly changed? 570 00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:39,461 [gasps/groans] 571 00:23:40,636 --> 00:23:42,072 I'm fine. 572 00:23:45,989 --> 00:23:51,038 I was a gay HIV-negative man. 573 00:23:51,081 --> 00:23:53,170 My friends were dying. 574 00:23:55,825 --> 00:23:57,914 They needed blood. 575 00:24:00,482 --> 00:24:02,310 I couldn't donate. 576 00:24:05,226 --> 00:24:09,360 I was the head of the damn blood bank. 577 00:24:11,275 --> 00:24:15,323 You know what that feels like? 578 00:24:15,366 --> 00:24:18,805 A person has to do something. 579 00:24:18,848 --> 00:24:21,329 Has to act. 580 00:24:22,722 --> 00:24:24,637 - Like Howie Cournemeyer? 581 00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:27,944 - [chuckles] 582 00:24:30,860 --> 00:24:33,384 Howie was fearless. 583 00:24:33,428 --> 00:24:35,169 I never met him, 584 00:24:35,212 --> 00:24:40,522 but God, was he inspiring. 585 00:24:40,566 --> 00:24:43,786 He made it so simple. 586 00:24:43,830 --> 00:24:46,963 Just do something. 587 00:24:47,007 --> 00:24:49,662 Act up. 588 00:24:49,705 --> 00:24:51,533 And I did. 589 00:24:55,494 --> 00:24:59,280 - You had gay men hide their identities 590 00:24:59,323 --> 00:25:01,630 and donate 591 00:25:01,674 --> 00:25:03,632 using Howie's name. 592 00:25:05,025 --> 00:25:07,767 - That's the best thing to do in a plague. 593 00:25:07,810 --> 00:25:09,899 Give. 594 00:25:09,943 --> 00:25:12,554 Help. 595 00:25:12,598 --> 00:25:16,558 I got to see scared men going from 596 00:25:16,602 --> 00:25:19,822 helpless to heroes, 597 00:25:19,866 --> 00:25:22,651 drop by drop. 598 00:25:24,697 --> 00:25:26,960 Until... 599 00:25:27,003 --> 00:25:29,136 - Helms found out. 600 00:25:29,179 --> 00:25:31,965 - He said he'd fire me. 601 00:25:32,008 --> 00:25:35,011 My staff too. 602 00:25:35,055 --> 00:25:38,885 Howie Cournemeyer would have kept fighting, 603 00:25:38,928 --> 00:25:41,670 but I needed my job. 604 00:25:41,714 --> 00:25:44,020 So I shut the program down. 605 00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:49,156 And that's something I have to live with 606 00:25:49,199 --> 00:25:51,288 for the rest of my life. 607 00:25:59,166 --> 00:26:01,211 - You refilled this hospital's blood bank 608 00:26:01,255 --> 00:26:05,389 in under a month during a pandemic. 609 00:26:07,653 --> 00:26:09,611 You're a hero. 610 00:26:09,655 --> 00:26:13,615 - Yet you honor the man that made me a coward. 611 00:26:16,662 --> 00:26:20,622 The world is burning, Dr. Goodwin. 612 00:26:24,147 --> 00:26:27,107 And you spend your day hunting me down 613 00:26:27,150 --> 00:26:29,718 for defacing a photograph? 614 00:26:32,329 --> 00:26:36,986 Shame then, shame now. 615 00:26:43,471 --> 00:26:45,081 - You came back. 616 00:26:49,172 --> 00:26:51,044 - Reynolds? 617 00:26:52,698 --> 00:26:54,656 What was that? 618 00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:57,137 - What Kwame wants more than anything 619 00:26:57,180 --> 00:27:00,009 is to be a Mormon husband to a Mormon wife, 620 00:27:00,053 --> 00:27:01,620 and he thought he lost that. 621 00:27:01,663 --> 00:27:03,404 - He has lost that. He's gay. 622 00:27:03,447 --> 00:27:05,319 - No, no. He thought he lost that 623 00:27:05,362 --> 00:27:07,321 because he's HIV-positive, 624 00:27:07,364 --> 00:27:09,715 and he thought that meant that he couldn't have children. 625 00:27:09,758 --> 00:27:12,935 Which is the cornerstone of his spiritual community. 626 00:27:12,979 --> 00:27:14,894 - Gay people can have children. 627 00:27:14,937 --> 00:27:18,375 - But between HART therapy and PrEP, of course, 628 00:27:18,419 --> 00:27:21,074 HIV can be untransmittable and safe for conception. 629 00:27:21,117 --> 00:27:23,554 So I called the Elder, let him know that, 630 00:27:23,598 --> 00:27:25,644 and he feels there's a path for Kwame. 631 00:27:25,687 --> 00:27:28,037 He even suggested that he can marry a woman 632 00:27:28,081 --> 00:27:30,083 who knows about his struggles. 633 00:27:31,867 --> 00:27:33,695 - Are you kidding me? 634 00:27:33,739 --> 00:27:35,479 You used the science of HIV 635 00:27:35,523 --> 00:27:38,439 to put someone back into the closet. 636 00:27:38,482 --> 00:27:40,702 - Well, that's-- that's what he wants. 637 00:27:40,746 --> 00:27:43,444 - So if he wanted to shoot himself in the head, 638 00:27:43,487 --> 00:27:45,228 where would you have stood on that? 639 00:27:45,272 --> 00:27:47,317 - What if he wanted to leave the E.D. 640 00:27:47,361 --> 00:27:48,841 with a failing pancreas? 641 00:27:48,884 --> 00:27:51,234 You think I like this? I don't. 642 00:27:51,278 --> 00:27:53,846 But we can't pick and choose when to respect 643 00:27:53,889 --> 00:27:55,195 our patient's wishes. 644 00:27:55,238 --> 00:27:58,024 And being a Mormon is more important to Kwame 645 00:27:58,067 --> 00:27:59,503 than his sexuality. 646 00:27:59,547 --> 00:28:01,549 - Well, the guy he had unprotected sex with 647 00:28:01,592 --> 00:28:03,551 disagrees with you. - Oh, come on. 648 00:28:03,594 --> 00:28:05,858 Nobody's torturing him. He's choosing this. 649 00:28:05,901 --> 00:28:06,946 - Yes. 650 00:28:06,989 --> 00:28:09,339 Yeah, he is choosing a life 651 00:28:09,383 --> 00:28:11,472 based on the idea that he has to 652 00:28:11,515 --> 00:28:13,996 be somebody that he's not. 653 00:28:14,040 --> 00:28:17,217 Because there's something wrong with who he is. 654 00:28:17,260 --> 00:28:20,046 Look, I get what you were trying to do here, Floyd, 655 00:28:20,089 --> 00:28:23,353 but we're talking about his heart. 656 00:28:39,195 --> 00:28:41,154 - Well, hello there. 657 00:28:41,197 --> 00:28:44,592 So, I noticed that you went out earlier. 658 00:28:44,635 --> 00:28:47,334 - Yes. With Kevin. He's my old friend. 659 00:28:47,377 --> 00:28:49,553 - Your old friend? - Yes. 660 00:28:49,597 --> 00:28:51,164 You've been in New York five hours, 661 00:28:51,207 --> 00:28:52,382 and you've got an old friend? 662 00:28:52,426 --> 00:28:53,514 - He's a friend from the internet. 663 00:28:53,557 --> 00:28:55,255 From when we were kids. 664 00:28:55,298 --> 00:28:57,692 - I see. And he's, um, 665 00:28:57,736 --> 00:28:59,650 how old? 666 00:28:59,694 --> 00:29:02,436 - I'm not sure. Can I go to your office now? 667 00:29:02,479 --> 00:29:05,787 - Mina. Did you get my texts? 668 00:29:05,831 --> 00:29:07,615 - I was busy. 669 00:29:07,658 --> 00:29:09,138 - Busy. 670 00:29:09,182 --> 00:29:10,792 - Is there a problem? 671 00:29:10,836 --> 00:29:13,229 I thought you said to treat you like a friend. 672 00:29:13,273 --> 00:29:14,622 - Yep, absolutely. 673 00:29:14,665 --> 00:29:17,016 - And I didn't text any of my friends 674 00:29:17,059 --> 00:29:18,713 to tell them that I was hanging out with Kevin. 675 00:29:18,757 --> 00:29:20,367 - Yes, no, of course. It's just, um, 676 00:29:20,410 --> 00:29:22,499 you've never been to New York before. 677 00:29:22,543 --> 00:29:25,459 - Oh, it's a lot like Tehran, just a little less crowded. 678 00:29:25,502 --> 00:29:27,591 I'll see you when you're done? 679 00:29:30,725 --> 00:29:31,770 - [sighs] 680 00:29:33,032 --> 00:29:35,469 - Max, you wanted to see me. 681 00:29:35,512 --> 00:29:37,471 - Hey, George. I, uh... 682 00:29:39,690 --> 00:29:41,692 I heard about Howie Cournemeyer. 683 00:29:45,479 --> 00:29:49,222 - Oh, I know how that looks. 684 00:29:49,265 --> 00:29:51,790 If I let that continue for one more day, 685 00:29:51,833 --> 00:29:55,532 it would have been an unmitigated disaster. 686 00:29:55,576 --> 00:30:00,320 - It did circumvent a ugly, very discriminatory regulation. 687 00:30:00,363 --> 00:30:03,453 - No, no, it violated federal policy. 688 00:30:03,497 --> 00:30:04,672 I may have been a maverick, 689 00:30:04,715 --> 00:30:06,805 but I wasn't about to become a criminal. 690 00:30:06,848 --> 00:30:10,243 The liability alone would have crippled us. 691 00:30:10,286 --> 00:30:13,724 - What did you do with all that blood? 692 00:30:13,768 --> 00:30:15,422 - Disposed of it. 693 00:30:15,465 --> 00:30:17,511 - Even though all donated blood is screened? 694 00:30:17,554 --> 00:30:20,514 You threw it away, George. 695 00:30:20,557 --> 00:30:22,124 You could have helped people. 696 00:30:22,168 --> 00:30:24,257 And you chose not to. 697 00:30:30,350 --> 00:30:31,830 - You know, the last time I checked, 698 00:30:31,873 --> 00:30:35,137 those were still the FDA guidelines. 699 00:30:35,181 --> 00:30:37,009 And as far as I can tell, 700 00:30:37,052 --> 00:30:42,492 you aren't doing a damn thing about them either. 701 00:30:46,932 --> 00:30:51,675 [phone rings] 702 00:30:51,719 --> 00:30:54,330 - Ella? Hi. - Hey, hey, Dr. Frome. 703 00:30:54,374 --> 00:30:56,115 - Hi, are you okay? 704 00:30:56,158 --> 00:30:57,377 What about Vijay? What's happening? 705 00:30:57,420 --> 00:30:59,205 - No, hey, we're good. We're all good. 706 00:30:59,248 --> 00:31:00,902 Um, I just have to be quick 707 00:31:00,946 --> 00:31:02,208 'cause he doesn't know I'm calling you. 708 00:31:02,251 --> 00:31:03,862 I heard your messages. 709 00:31:03,905 --> 00:31:06,734 - Okay, well, I'm glad somebody did. 710 00:31:06,777 --> 00:31:10,042 - Yeah, uh, Iggy, you have been so good to him. 711 00:31:10,085 --> 00:31:12,044 To me. - [exhales] 712 00:31:12,087 --> 00:31:14,437 - You deserve to know what's going on. 713 00:31:16,613 --> 00:31:18,398 - You know, honestly, Ella, I don't-- 714 00:31:18,441 --> 00:31:21,314 I don't really care anymore, so-- 715 00:31:21,357 --> 00:31:24,056 - Vijay's doctor told him he's never gonna work again. 716 00:31:24,099 --> 00:31:27,973 Um, about a month ago. He didn't want to believe it. 717 00:31:28,016 --> 00:31:29,539 He kept saying that the guy was crazy, 718 00:31:29,583 --> 00:31:31,019 didn't know what he was talking about. 719 00:31:31,063 --> 00:31:33,761 But, um, a couple days after, he got ready, 720 00:31:33,804 --> 00:31:36,068 and decided to come into the hospital early, 721 00:31:36,111 --> 00:31:38,113 and surprise everybody. 722 00:31:38,157 --> 00:31:40,681 Um, he couldn't make it out the front door. 723 00:31:48,123 --> 00:31:50,734 He won't talk to me about it. 724 00:31:50,778 --> 00:31:52,649 He won't talk to anyone right now. 725 00:31:52,693 --> 00:31:55,261 So, um, 726 00:31:55,304 --> 00:31:57,785 that's why I had to call. 727 00:31:57,828 --> 00:32:00,266 You know, so you'd know. - Yeah. 728 00:32:00,309 --> 00:32:02,703 - Uh, a couple days ago, 729 00:32:02,746 --> 00:32:04,487 he told me a story about you. 730 00:32:04,531 --> 00:32:07,099 About a patient who thought he was dead? 731 00:32:07,142 --> 00:32:09,318 - Yeah. Yeah, I remember. 732 00:32:09,362 --> 00:32:11,799 - And Vijay said how much you helped the guy. 733 00:32:11,842 --> 00:32:15,194 Helped his fiancée to understand. 734 00:32:15,237 --> 00:32:16,978 And Vijay said that 735 00:32:17,022 --> 00:32:19,981 he might have saved the guy's life but-- 736 00:32:20,025 --> 00:32:22,679 but you saved his soul. 737 00:32:22,723 --> 00:32:24,072 That's what you do. 738 00:32:24,116 --> 00:32:26,857 Dr. Frome, you just go around saving souls. 739 00:32:29,469 --> 00:32:30,644 - [sighs] 740 00:32:30,687 --> 00:32:32,428 I learned from the best. 741 00:32:34,387 --> 00:32:36,867 [sniffles] 742 00:32:39,566 --> 00:32:39,958 . 743 00:32:40,001 --> 00:32:42,177 - Great news. It's just a hemangioma, 744 00:32:42,221 --> 00:32:43,483 which is a collection of blood vessels 745 00:32:43,526 --> 00:32:44,832 that should disappear on their own. 746 00:32:44,875 --> 00:32:46,181 - Oh, my God. Thank God. 747 00:32:46,225 --> 00:32:48,096 Okay. - So, next step is to 748 00:32:48,140 --> 00:32:49,837 adjust your antiretrovirals. 749 00:32:49,880 --> 00:32:51,360 I'll need to see you back here tomorrow. 750 00:32:51,404 --> 00:32:52,535 - Oh, my God, I'm so behind on work. 751 00:32:52,579 --> 00:32:54,407 There's no way I can come in tomorrow. 752 00:32:55,974 --> 00:32:57,279 Your HIV care is important, Karla. 753 00:32:57,323 --> 00:32:58,977 - Yes, I know it's important, 754 00:32:59,020 --> 00:33:00,761 but it didn't give me cancer, right? 755 00:33:00,804 --> 00:33:02,415 Didn't almost kill me. 756 00:33:02,458 --> 00:33:04,504 So can I call you when I come back up for air? 757 00:33:06,288 --> 00:33:08,987 - Perfect. Next time I see you, it'll be in the morgue. 758 00:33:11,859 --> 00:33:14,470 You are walking out of here. 759 00:33:14,514 --> 00:33:16,037 You're lucky, 'cause the kind of cancer 760 00:33:16,081 --> 00:33:17,430 we thought you had is deadly, 761 00:33:17,473 --> 00:33:20,433 and it's God's own luck that you don't have it. 762 00:33:20,476 --> 00:33:23,001 If what you take from this is that you can continue 763 00:33:23,044 --> 00:33:24,611 treating your HIV like it's hay fever, 764 00:33:24,654 --> 00:33:26,482 then I have no doubt I'll be seeing you very soon, 765 00:33:26,526 --> 00:33:28,484 whether you have room in your schedule or not. 766 00:33:29,877 --> 00:33:31,357 - Um, tomorrow's good. 767 00:33:35,752 --> 00:33:36,971 - I can take him from here. 768 00:33:37,015 --> 00:33:38,842 - Ah, this one. 769 00:33:38,886 --> 00:33:40,888 - This one, unfortunately. You mind? 770 00:33:40,931 --> 00:33:43,630 - I don't retract a word I wrote. 771 00:33:43,673 --> 00:33:45,849 Shame then, shame now. 772 00:33:45,893 --> 00:33:49,201 Yeah, well, I hope you don't, because you were right. 773 00:33:50,550 --> 00:33:53,901 Dale, I'd like you to meet Howie Cournemeyer. 774 00:33:58,340 --> 00:34:00,560 - Mr. Cournemeyer-- - Howie. 775 00:34:02,736 --> 00:34:04,607 Excited to meet you. 776 00:34:04,651 --> 00:34:06,566 - You know, the gay blood ban? 777 00:34:06,609 --> 00:34:08,046 It's not just a regulation. 778 00:34:08,089 --> 00:34:09,525 It's hate. 779 00:34:09,569 --> 00:34:11,919 We should be ashamed for allowing it. 780 00:34:11,962 --> 00:34:15,357 So I'm initiating a new policy regarding the gay blood ban. 781 00:34:15,401 --> 00:34:17,055 I'm ignoring it. 782 00:34:17,098 --> 00:34:19,579 And Howie is our first donor. 783 00:34:23,235 --> 00:34:25,672 - You can't. They'll strip your funding. 784 00:34:28,196 --> 00:34:29,980 - [whispers] Yeah. 785 00:34:30,024 --> 00:34:31,678 Well, then we'll just take them to court. 786 00:34:31,721 --> 00:34:33,201 And when we win, 787 00:34:33,245 --> 00:34:37,075 they will throw that bigoted law in the trash, 788 00:34:37,118 --> 00:34:39,077 thanks to you. 789 00:34:43,646 --> 00:34:47,172 - I've been screaming about this nonsense for 30 years, 790 00:34:47,215 --> 00:34:50,436 and nothing happened. 791 00:34:50,479 --> 00:34:52,264 Look what you did. 792 00:34:55,876 --> 00:34:59,619 - [sobs] 793 00:35:02,709 --> 00:35:05,103 - Hey, I'm finishing my chart on Karla. 794 00:35:05,146 --> 00:35:06,582 Any surprises at discharge? 795 00:35:06,626 --> 00:35:09,107 - Uh, no. She just needed a little bit of tough love. 796 00:35:09,150 --> 00:35:10,586 - Scared her to death, huh? - [chuckles] 797 00:35:10,630 --> 00:35:12,588 - Love it when you get all Mama Bear. 798 00:35:12,632 --> 00:35:14,112 - A quality that's deserted me now that 799 00:35:14,155 --> 00:35:16,549 there's a Baby Bear in my office. 800 00:35:16,592 --> 00:35:18,768 Um, honestly, 801 00:35:18,812 --> 00:35:20,335 Mina walked all over me today, 802 00:35:20,379 --> 00:35:21,858 and I'm just letting her do it. 803 00:35:21,902 --> 00:35:23,164 I--I don't know what to say. 804 00:35:23,208 --> 00:35:26,124 - Just talk to her like she's a patient. 805 00:35:26,167 --> 00:35:27,690 - But she's not. 806 00:35:27,734 --> 00:35:30,258 I mean her father's just died, she's in a new country. 807 00:35:30,302 --> 00:35:31,694 If someone should be playing bad cop with her, 808 00:35:31,738 --> 00:35:33,653 it really shouldn't be me. I barely know her. 809 00:35:33,696 --> 00:35:35,350 I'm not her aunt at all. Really, I'm just-- 810 00:35:35,394 --> 00:35:38,397 [chuckles] some woman. 811 00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:40,747 - My sister and I, we're both addicts 812 00:35:40,790 --> 00:35:42,618 who only trust chaos and 813 00:35:42,662 --> 00:35:45,708 are incapable of having intimate relationships. 814 00:35:45,752 --> 00:35:48,929 That's what happens when no one gives you boundaries. 815 00:35:48,972 --> 00:35:50,713 You're all Mina has now. 816 00:35:50,757 --> 00:35:53,542 You've got to be her mother, her aunt, her friend. 817 00:35:53,586 --> 00:35:54,891 Her everything. 818 00:35:54,935 --> 00:35:58,156 And if you can't do that then, yeah, you're right. 819 00:35:58,199 --> 00:36:02,247 You're just some woman who doesn't deserve her. 820 00:36:02,290 --> 00:36:05,511 - Those are wise words coming from someone that 821 00:36:05,554 --> 00:36:07,904 let a stranger live in our storage closet. 822 00:36:07,948 --> 00:36:09,993 - Well, you can't win 'em all. 823 00:36:10,037 --> 00:36:12,344 - [chuckles] - Good luck. 824 00:36:12,387 --> 00:36:13,388 - [sighs] 825 00:36:16,130 --> 00:36:17,175 [clears throat] 826 00:36:19,220 --> 00:36:21,179 - Hi! - Here's Baby Dahmer. 827 00:36:21,222 --> 00:36:23,050 - That bad? 828 00:36:23,093 --> 00:36:25,574 - When she wasn't gnawing on me, 829 00:36:25,618 --> 00:36:27,663 I checked out some parenting blogs. 830 00:36:27,707 --> 00:36:30,013 Um, apparently biting's pretty normal, 831 00:36:30,057 --> 00:36:31,928 so I wouldn't, like, beat yourself up. 832 00:36:31,972 --> 00:36:35,845 - Yeah, I guess it's their way of, I don't know, acting out. 833 00:36:35,889 --> 00:36:39,675 I--she's trying to tell me she's missing something. 834 00:36:39,719 --> 00:36:42,504 - Yeah, her data plan, by the looks of it. 835 00:36:45,725 --> 00:36:47,770 - Her grandma. 836 00:36:47,814 --> 00:36:49,381 - Oh, problem solved. 837 00:36:49,424 --> 00:36:51,165 Can't she just spend more time with her? 838 00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:53,341 - Uh... 839 00:36:55,082 --> 00:36:56,910 Gwen would love nothing more. 840 00:36:56,953 --> 00:37:00,087 - And that's bad because...? 841 00:37:03,308 --> 00:37:06,311 - Just means I can't do this on my own. 842 00:37:11,794 --> 00:37:14,057 - Max. 843 00:37:14,101 --> 00:37:16,234 I don't think you're supposed to. 844 00:37:21,935 --> 00:37:24,894 - Days like this make me think of His mysterious ways. 845 00:37:24,938 --> 00:37:28,550 [indistinct conversation] 846 00:37:34,121 --> 00:37:35,731 [click] 847 00:37:35,775 --> 00:37:37,864 [video call rings] 848 00:37:37,907 --> 00:37:39,431 - Hey. 849 00:37:39,474 --> 00:37:41,389 - Floyd. 850 00:37:41,433 --> 00:37:42,999 Did the Venmo not go through? 851 00:37:43,043 --> 00:37:44,740 - No, no, everything's all good. 852 00:37:44,784 --> 00:37:47,047 Uh, I was just thinking. 853 00:37:47,090 --> 00:37:49,005 Well, not thinking. 854 00:37:49,049 --> 00:37:50,703 I, uh... 855 00:37:52,618 --> 00:37:55,055 I know that-- 856 00:37:55,098 --> 00:37:57,013 - Know what? 857 00:37:57,057 --> 00:37:58,276 - That I made a mistake. 858 00:38:00,147 --> 00:38:01,322 - Floyd, I-- 859 00:38:01,366 --> 00:38:02,410 - You know that old school joint, 860 00:38:02,454 --> 00:38:04,282 "If loving you is wrong--" - Floyd. 861 00:38:04,325 --> 00:38:05,718 - I know you feel me. 862 00:38:07,285 --> 00:38:08,764 - I do. 863 00:38:08,808 --> 00:38:11,724 [chuckles] 864 00:38:11,767 --> 00:38:13,029 I do. 865 00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:15,945 But I also know that I'm nobody's wrong. 866 00:38:15,989 --> 00:38:18,600 And if I were your right, 867 00:38:18,644 --> 00:38:23,997 we wouldn't be having this talk thousands of miles apart. 868 00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:25,912 - But if our love was real, 869 00:38:25,955 --> 00:38:29,089 you know, we can cover that. 870 00:38:29,132 --> 00:38:31,309 - The "if" 871 00:38:31,352 --> 00:38:33,485 is doing all the lifting in that statement. 872 00:38:35,443 --> 00:38:37,750 - You saying it wasn't real? 873 00:38:37,793 --> 00:38:40,143 - I'm just saying 874 00:38:40,187 --> 00:38:43,233 that whatever it was, 875 00:38:43,277 --> 00:38:46,411 it obviously wasn't enough for you. 876 00:38:46,454 --> 00:38:48,195 You need to own it, Floyd. 877 00:38:50,937 --> 00:38:52,895 You made your choice. 878 00:38:54,462 --> 00:38:56,682 And so have I. 879 00:38:57,683 --> 00:38:59,075 - Evie-- 880 00:38:59,119 --> 00:39:02,035 [somber piano music] 881 00:39:02,078 --> 00:39:09,216 ♪ 882 00:39:11,044 --> 00:39:14,482 [line rings] 883 00:39:14,526 --> 00:39:15,744 - Hi, Gwen. - Is everything okay? 884 00:39:15,788 --> 00:39:17,267 - No, no, no, everything's fine. 885 00:39:17,311 --> 00:39:20,488 - Um, uh... 886 00:39:20,532 --> 00:39:23,186 Well, we were just wondering if, um, 887 00:39:23,230 --> 00:39:25,537 you might be able to come over. 888 00:39:25,580 --> 00:39:27,930 Uh, 889 00:39:27,974 --> 00:39:31,978 a few days a week? 890 00:39:32,021 --> 00:39:34,850 I think Luna really needs ya. 891 00:39:34,894 --> 00:39:38,680 And, uh, 892 00:39:38,724 --> 00:39:41,030 I think I really need the help. 893 00:39:41,074 --> 00:39:42,771 ["By the Time It Gets Dark" by Yo La Tengo playing] 894 00:39:42,815 --> 00:39:47,994 - ♪ Baby, every cloud has a silver lining ♪ 895 00:39:48,037 --> 00:39:53,869 ♪ Baby, every dog really has its day ♪ 896 00:39:53,913 --> 00:39:59,048 ♪ And it matters to me to see you smiling ♪ 897 00:39:59,092 --> 00:40:04,227 ♪ Why don't we blow all your cares away ♪ 898 00:40:04,271 --> 00:40:09,581 ♪ Yesterday's gone and will be forgotten ♪ 899 00:40:09,624 --> 00:40:15,021 ♪ And today is where every new day starts ♪ 900 00:40:15,064 --> 00:40:16,414 - Hey. - Hey. 901 00:40:18,590 --> 00:40:20,200 - How was your day? 902 00:40:20,243 --> 00:40:22,811 - Ugh, long. How 'bout yours? 903 00:40:22,855 --> 00:40:25,814 - Oh, my God, so long. So long. 904 00:40:28,643 --> 00:40:30,428 Can you remind me whose bright idea it was 905 00:40:30,471 --> 00:40:32,473 to put a full-length mirror in our bedroom? 906 00:40:32,517 --> 00:40:34,693 - Uh, yours? 907 00:40:34,736 --> 00:40:38,087 - [chuckles] Course. 908 00:40:38,131 --> 00:40:41,700 Glutton for punishment. 909 00:40:41,743 --> 00:40:45,007 [exhales deeply] 910 00:40:45,051 --> 00:40:47,836 Vijay resigned today. 911 00:40:47,880 --> 00:40:50,752 - Oh, no, really? 912 00:40:50,796 --> 00:40:52,537 - Yeah, I was really upset about it for 913 00:40:52,580 --> 00:40:54,452 most of the day, actually. 914 00:40:54,495 --> 00:40:57,455 Selfishly. 915 00:40:57,498 --> 00:40:59,500 He validates me, you know. - Mm-hmm. 916 00:40:59,544 --> 00:41:01,546 Waiting most of my life for a father figure 917 00:41:01,589 --> 00:41:03,939 to tell me that I'm good enough. 918 00:41:03,983 --> 00:41:05,506 Now he's gone. 919 00:41:05,550 --> 00:41:08,596 - Hey, I'm sorry. - [sighs] 920 00:41:11,120 --> 00:41:14,123 It's okay. 921 00:41:14,167 --> 00:41:16,561 Because I, um, 922 00:41:16,604 --> 00:41:19,520 I think it's time that I start to feel 923 00:41:19,564 --> 00:41:23,176 like I'm good enough on my own. 924 00:41:23,219 --> 00:41:25,744 I want to look in this mirror 925 00:41:25,787 --> 00:41:27,659 and I want to see someone... 926 00:41:30,313 --> 00:41:32,620 Good enough. 927 00:41:32,664 --> 00:41:38,496 - ♪ By the evening we'll be laughing ♪ 928 00:41:38,539 --> 00:41:42,848 ♪ Just wait and see all the changes there'll be ♪ 929 00:41:42,891 --> 00:41:47,809 ♪ By the time it gets dark 930 00:41:47,853 --> 00:41:50,072 - You are... 931 00:41:50,116 --> 00:41:51,378 more than good enough. 932 00:41:51,421 --> 00:41:55,121 - ♪ By the evening we'll be laughing ♪ 933 00:41:55,164 --> 00:41:56,992 - You're beautiful. 934 00:41:57,036 --> 00:42:01,475 - ♪ Just wait and see all the changes there'll be ♪ 935 00:42:01,519 --> 00:42:04,957 ♪ By the time it gets dark 936 00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:07,350 - No. No, no, no, 937 00:42:07,394 --> 00:42:09,178 Leave 'em on. 938 00:42:09,222 --> 00:42:12,442 Leave 'em on. 939 00:42:12,486 --> 00:42:17,622 - ♪ By the time it gets dark 940 00:42:17,665 --> 00:42:20,886 ♪ By the time it gets dark