1
00:00:15,056 --> 00:00:16,933
Hold all my calls.

2
00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,811
[giggling]

3
00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:21,479
♪ Boss Baby ♪

4
00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:25,442
♪ I'm the Boss, Boss Baby, boss, boss
Boss Baby, boss, boss ♪

5
00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:28,069
♪ Watch a itty-bitty kid get large ♪

6
00:00:28,153 --> 00:00:30,697
♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪

7
00:00:30,780 --> 00:00:33,158
♪ Stroller rolling
Up and down the boulevard ♪

8
00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:35,744
♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪

9
00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:39,080
♪ I run this house, I rule this crib ♪

10
00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:41,624
♪ Change my diaper, son
Where's my bib? ♪

11
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:44,419
♪ Don't pacify
You just got to pay me ♪

12
00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:46,963
-♪ Who's in charge? ♪
-♪ Me, the Boss Baby ♪

13
00:00:48,047 --> 00:00:50,467
-[birds chirping]
-[inhales deeply]

14
00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:51,843
[exhales]

15
00:00:51,926 --> 00:00:54,137
[chirping continues]

16
00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:55,889
That's what a bird sounds like.

17
00:00:55,972 --> 00:00:57,807
You wanna hear what a horsey sounds like?

18
00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,267
I very much do, but later.

19
00:00:59,350 --> 00:01:02,687
For now, let's all just bask
in the progress we've made

20
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:05,690
toward winning 100 percent
of the world's love.

21
00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:08,568
A slow, steady march
to Yellow 100.

22
00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:12,280
[chuckles] We're so good at this,
it's almost boring.

23
00:01:12,363 --> 00:01:14,115
Know what'd make
this moment perfect?

24
00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:17,619
-Spreadsheets fresh off the printer?
-Still warm!

25
00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:19,537
Ooh! Ah.

26
00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:22,040
I need approval
for the Binkle-Tinkleton merger.

27
00:01:22,123 --> 00:01:23,208
Love that merger!

28
00:01:23,291 --> 00:01:25,710
Uh, designs for the self-cleaning
high chair.

29
00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:27,045
More high, less chair.

30
00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:28,296
-Blip!
-Bleep.

31
00:01:28,379 --> 00:01:30,006
-Bloop.
-I got this one!

32
00:01:30,089 --> 00:01:32,926
[stammers] Um, what a robot sounds like?

33
00:01:33,009 --> 00:01:35,386
Uh-uh. That's what the big board
sounds like.

34
00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:38,223
-[screen trills]
-What the blip bleep bloop was that?

35
00:01:38,306 --> 00:01:41,518
[gasps] Did baby love just go... down?

36
00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:43,978
Maybe it's a programming glitch?

37
00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:45,980
Hang on, I'll punch a computer.

38
00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:47,524
-[Jimbo grunts]
-[baby] Hey!

39
00:01:53,905 --> 00:01:55,323
-[trills]
-[slurps, spits]

40
00:01:55,406 --> 00:01:56,950
It's real! It's happening!

41
00:01:57,033 --> 00:01:58,785
It's the first wave of a market crash!

42
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,453
Sound the alarm!

43
00:02:00,870 --> 00:02:03,331
Sir, we haven't installed
the new siren yet.

44
00:02:03,414 --> 00:02:07,836
You wanted that extra sireny one,
and it was on back order, so--

45
00:02:07,919 --> 00:02:09,295
-Triplets!
-Yes!

46
00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:11,339
[siren wailing]

47
00:02:11,422 --> 00:02:14,425
Emergency protocols!
Yellow 100 is under attack!

48
00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:17,303
[all screaming]

49
00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:19,597
Find me anything
that could have caused that dip.

50
00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:22,559
Diaper change in a restaurant?
Tantrum at a violin concerto?

51
00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:25,770
-Who's doing this?
-[Hendershot] Double-B, I got something.

52
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,856
[upbeat music playing]

53
00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:29,983
♪ It's Pyg, yeah, Pyg ♪

54
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:31,985
♪ Go, Pyg, the Pygmy Goat ♪

55
00:02:34,612 --> 00:02:35,947
♪ It's Tam, go, Tam ♪

56
00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:37,824
♪ Hey, Tam the Tamandua ♪

57
00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:39,242
♪ Maria-Maria ♪

58
00:02:39,325 --> 00:02:42,745
♪ Say, hey, Mari-Maria ♪

59
00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:45,707
♪ Go, babies, yeah, babies, go ♪

60
00:02:45,832 --> 00:02:48,293
[robotic voice] Pyg & Tam Love Babies.

61
00:02:50,795 --> 00:02:52,714
Permission to "aww," sir?

62
00:02:52,797 --> 00:02:54,257
Granted, but keep it short.

63
00:02:54,340 --> 00:02:56,009
[all] Aww!

64
00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:56,926
Done.

65
00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:01,472
That was the most adorable,
catchy thing I've seen in my life.

66
00:03:01,556 --> 00:03:03,141
Who was that?

67
00:03:03,766 --> 00:03:06,978
Pyg and Tam,
huge TV stars in South America.

68
00:03:07,061 --> 00:03:08,062
They say it's for babies,

69
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:11,566
but it's so dang precious,
folks all ages love the show.

70
00:03:11,774 --> 00:03:13,318
That was a TV show?

71
00:03:13,401 --> 00:03:17,322
Just started airing in the local market.
Probably what caused the dip in baby love.

72
00:03:17,405 --> 00:03:19,490
I thought puppies and kittens
were the worst.

73
00:03:19,574 --> 00:03:22,535
But they're no match for... exotic pets.

74
00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:23,953
Whoa, hang on.

75
00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,039
Says here they're actually taping locally,

76
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,166
in front of a live audience
at Channel Eight.

77
00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:30,209
Thanks, Hendo.
I'll get my team together.

78
00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:33,087
See what the hubbub is all about
and report back.

79
00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:34,714
[Boss Baby] Keep that tank in park.

80
00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:36,883
I'd like to do this recon myself.

81
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:40,845
With all due respect, sir,
I'm VP of field ops, you're CEO.

82
00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:43,514
Normally, I go out, you stay in.

83
00:03:43,598 --> 00:03:45,475
Love that Staci-brand moxie!

84
00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:48,770
But in a world
where a small goat in a sweater

85
00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:52,023
and an anteater in a hat
steal love from babies,

86
00:03:52,106 --> 00:03:54,817
-there is no normal.
-[elevator dings]

87
00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:59,364
[dramatic music playing]

88
00:03:59,447 --> 00:04:01,407
That's what drama sounds like.

89
00:04:01,824 --> 00:04:04,535
Ha! This is more adorable
than a dollop of cream!

90
00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:06,079
[shouting] Computer music!

91
00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:09,749
So this is the next thing
we have to listen to on all-day repeat

92
00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:11,542
to keep a baby happy?

93
00:04:11,876 --> 00:04:13,920
Look at these sheep, Templeton.

94
00:04:14,003 --> 00:04:16,923
It's like they're all drinking
the sugar cereal milk.

95
00:04:17,215 --> 00:04:18,091
Templeton?

96
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:21,052
I expected more from you.

97
00:04:21,135 --> 00:04:24,681
Sorry! You know how hard it is to find
a hat that fits my awesome-shaped head?

98
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,641
And the bobbing to the music?

99
00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:29,143
I have worms.

100
00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:30,520
Why can't I just be a fan?

101
00:04:30,728 --> 00:04:34,274
Some flash-in-the-pan goat
and tamandua hit my town,

102
00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:36,067
and baby love takes a dip?

103
00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:37,777
I don't like the way this smells.

104
00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:41,239
And that's coming from a baby who needed
a diaper change two hours ago.

105
00:04:41,322 --> 00:04:42,699
-Ew!
-I've been busy!

106
00:04:42,782 --> 00:04:44,158
[upbeat music playing]

107
00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:48,454
♪ A Pygmy goat and a tamandua, man ♪

108
00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:51,541
♪ Pyg and Tam, Pyg and Tam ♪

109
00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:54,544
♪ Tam likes the choo-choos
Pyg likes to eat cans ♪

110
00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:56,629
♪ Pyg and Tam, Pyg and Tam ♪

111
00:04:56,713 --> 00:05:00,341
♪ Maria-Maria is a very nice lady ♪

112
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,802
[robotic voice] Pyg & Tam Love Babies.

113
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:06,556
[chuckles] When you put words
to the pew-pew-skronk,

114
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:07,932
it's actually pretty catchy.

115
00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:11,978
Parent-friendly theme song?
Oh, you're good.

116
00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:13,688
Let's see how good.

117
00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:15,523
-[applause]
-Hey, kiddos!

118
00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:17,567
Maria-Maria here!

119
00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:20,737
I'm so happy you came over
to play with us!

120
00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:22,196
Hey, Pyg!

121
00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:23,906
[bleats]

122
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:27,368
-How are you feeling today?
-[bleats]

123
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:28,995
"Grumpy!"

124
00:05:29,370 --> 00:05:30,538
Oh, no!

125
00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:33,458
You've probably been inside too long.

126
00:05:33,833 --> 00:05:35,960
[Tam and Maria-Maria yawn]

127
00:05:36,544 --> 00:05:40,465
"And I'm feeling slumberous."

128
00:05:40,673 --> 00:05:44,093
Oh, hi there, Tam. Low energy, huh?

129
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:47,722
Well, when I feel blue
from staying inside all day,

130
00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:51,517
I feel better when I go out and play!

131
00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:54,062
♪ Who's got the squirmy
Squamy squirmies? ♪

132
00:05:54,145 --> 00:05:55,063
[giggles]

133
00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:57,690
♪ Like a giggly gaggly wormy ♪

134
00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:58,608
[giggles]

135
00:05:58,691 --> 00:05:59,734
[cheering]

136
00:06:00,359 --> 00:06:02,904
-Oh, wow!
-Yeah, yeah, yeah!

137
00:06:03,404 --> 00:06:04,238
[woman] Yeah!

138
00:06:04,322 --> 00:06:05,698
[gasps] Earthquake...

139
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:08,326
localized in my butt?

140
00:06:08,659 --> 00:06:11,162
[grunting] Gah!

141
00:06:11,245 --> 00:06:13,790
Stupid catchy squirmy worm,
tushie dance bewitchment!

142
00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:14,874
[giggles, gasps]

143
00:06:14,957 --> 00:06:17,043
[grunts, pants]

144
00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:19,796
Okay, they're dangerously good.

145
00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:23,466
"Maria-Maria, I am having so much fun.

146
00:06:23,549 --> 00:06:27,762
But do you know who's missing out
on the funshine?"

147
00:06:27,845 --> 00:06:31,057
-[bleats]
-"Babies, babies, babies!"

148
00:06:31,682 --> 00:06:36,771
Which of you babies wants to join
Pyg and Tam playing outside?

149
00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:38,731
How about...

150
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,650
that one!

151
00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:42,610
[gasps] They're onto me! Act stupid!

152
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:43,820
-Huh?
-Perfect.

153
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:47,198
-[giggling]
-[Mom] Oh, my gosh! They picked our baby!

154
00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:49,158
[Dad] I guess we're supposed to
take him down there?

155
00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:51,702
-[Tim] I got him!
-[Dad] Yeah!

156
00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:52,954
Yeah!

157
00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:56,290
[giggles]

158
00:06:56,374 --> 00:06:57,959
[all] Aww!

159
00:06:58,626 --> 00:07:02,713
Oh, what a cute baby!

160
00:07:02,797 --> 00:07:04,715
"Do you know what I want to play?

161
00:07:04,799 --> 00:07:08,970
My favorite outside activity
in the whole wide world!"

162
00:07:10,054 --> 00:07:12,640
-[bleats]
-[Maria-Maria] "Walk the puppy!"

163
00:07:13,057 --> 00:07:14,642
How dare you?

164
00:07:15,059 --> 00:07:18,604
[crowd] Walk the puppy! Walk the puppy!

165
00:07:18,688 --> 00:07:20,982
[all] Aww!

166
00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:24,235
That's our son down there
dressed like a puppy!

167
00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:25,570
Ready?

168
00:07:25,653 --> 00:07:29,490
Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk the puppy!

169
00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:30,992
Everybody!

170
00:07:31,075 --> 00:07:35,163
[all] Walk, walk, walk, walk,
walk the puppy!

171
00:07:35,788 --> 00:07:38,040
[scoffs] Should have sent me.

172
00:07:38,749 --> 00:07:40,209
[Tim] I can't believe you were on TV!

173
00:07:40,418 --> 00:07:41,544
That was so fun!

174
00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:44,088
About as fun as a stage III diaper rash.

175
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,132
Oof, which I also currently have.

176
00:07:46,215 --> 00:07:49,760
Free advice: do not neglect
a diaper change for two-plus hours.

177
00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:52,513
I... don't think that advice
applies to me.

178
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:56,809
Any two Pyg and Tam beach towels
for only five bucks!

179
00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,269
Mix and match!

180
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:00,980
There's no way
Maria-Maria picked me at random.

181
00:08:01,189 --> 00:08:03,107
-That was a setup.
-For what?

182
00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:06,027
They're clearly after Baby Corp's share
of the love market.

183
00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:08,112
Embarrassing me was the warning shot.

184
00:08:08,196 --> 00:08:10,406
So what are they firing at us next?

185
00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:15,203
Uppies, Templeton.
I wanna look my adversary in the eye.

186
00:08:15,286 --> 00:08:18,164
Wonderful job on the show today!

187
00:08:18,247 --> 00:08:21,751
Pyg and Tam would love
to say "thank you" in person.

188
00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:23,002
Sounds awesome!

189
00:08:23,085 --> 00:08:24,754
Is it all right with your parents?

190
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,839
[Mom] I love Pyg and Tam!

191
00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:28,382
I think they're good.

192
00:08:28,466 --> 00:08:32,303
[Tam slurping]

193
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:34,305
[gulps]

194
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:35,973
[bleats]

195
00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:39,602
Um, fun show!

196
00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:41,229
-Really good job.
-Thank you.

197
00:08:41,312 --> 00:08:44,148
Mr. Pyg and Mr. Tam are honored
by your presence.

198
00:08:44,232 --> 00:08:47,151
Also, we know the baby can talk
and runs a secret corporation.

199
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,570
Great, we don't have to pretend anymore,

200
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:52,198
so why don't you drop
the phony translation act,

201
00:08:52,281 --> 00:08:55,910
pack up these poor, dumb circus animals
you're exploiting for TV ratings,

202
00:08:55,993 --> 00:08:58,871
and clear out of town
before this gets messy?

203
00:08:59,038 --> 00:09:01,040
You have me all wrong, Boss Baby.

204
00:09:01,123 --> 00:09:04,794
I am Pyg and Tam's communications liaison,
their lawyer, their agent,

205
00:09:04,877 --> 00:09:08,297
and sometimes I suck the helium
out of balloons for their amusement.

206
00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:13,177
[high-pitched voice] But I would never
exploit them.

207
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:16,013
-[bleats]
-"Laughing! Laughing!"

208
00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:18,432
"Ha, ha, ha."

209
00:09:19,016 --> 00:09:23,521
"Make sure they understand my voice
is actually one of gravity and import."

210
00:09:23,604 --> 00:09:24,814
Of course, Mr. Tam.

211
00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:26,232
[clears throat, coughs]

212
00:09:26,607 --> 00:09:29,569
[normal voice]
"Now, shall we do business?"

213
00:09:30,861 --> 00:09:32,780
The anteater's in charge?

214
00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:34,115
[laughs]

215
00:09:34,198 --> 00:09:35,741
That's hilarious!

216
00:09:38,953 --> 00:09:41,372
That was insensitive.
I'm sure you're great.

217
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,708
"I am in charge.

218
00:09:43,791 --> 00:09:45,418
But I'm a tamandua.

219
00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:48,546
-Anteaters are hillbillies."
-Noted.

220
00:09:48,629 --> 00:09:50,006
But my warning stands.

221
00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:51,924
I don't know how you found out
about Baby Corp.

222
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:54,385
"We share a mutual acquaintance.

223
00:09:54,468 --> 00:09:56,554
A Mr. The Pug?"

224
00:09:56,929 --> 00:09:58,931
Well, thank you, Bug.

225
00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:01,058
But my warning still stands.

226
00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:03,394
You come after our love, be ready to--

227
00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:07,481
"No. We have no interest
in stealing love from babies."

228
00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:09,358
[gasps] They wanna steal babies!

229
00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:11,152
"What?"
[high-pitched voice] "What?"

230
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:14,030
No? Sorry, just guessing.
Please continue.

231
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:18,117
[normal voice] "People's love for babies
is the pumping heart

232
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,161
of our television program.

233
00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:23,039
We are not your competition.

234
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:25,499
We hope only to be your--"

235
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:27,001
[high-pitched voice] "Friends!"

236
00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,713
Well, that changes everything.

237
00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:35,092
[normal voice] "This is such a thrill.

238
00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:38,888
We are all huge fans
of your Baby Corp work, BB."

239
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:40,056
I'm so flattered.

240
00:10:40,264 --> 00:10:42,224
"Is it okay that I call you BB?"

241
00:10:42,558 --> 00:10:43,976
BB my guest. [chuckles]

242
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:46,395
-[bleats]
-"Laughing! Laughing!"

243
00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:49,440
"Ha, ha, ha, ha!"

244
00:10:49,523 --> 00:10:53,152
We really must be going.
So many fan letters to answer.

245
00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:54,904
-You know how it is.
-Of course.

246
00:10:55,112 --> 00:11:00,451
But Mr. Pyg and Mr. Tam hope we can make
these get-togethers a regular event.

247
00:11:00,534 --> 00:11:01,744
Sounds lovely!

248
00:11:01,827 --> 00:11:04,121
CEO socializing makes the world go round.

249
00:11:04,205 --> 00:11:07,625
-There's our guys!
-Hobnobbing with the big stars!

250
00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:09,960
-Can we take a picture?
-Of course!

251
00:11:10,169 --> 00:11:12,046
Everyone, gather round!

252
00:11:12,129 --> 00:11:14,173
Say "Pyg and Tam!"

253
00:11:14,256 --> 00:11:16,717
-[all] Pyg and Tam!
-[camera shutter clicks]

254
00:11:16,801 --> 00:11:20,346
And you guys talked through your issues,
and nobody tried to assassinate anybody,

255
00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:22,264
and now we're friends with TV stars!

256
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,642
I can't believe how great
everything worked out!

257
00:11:24,725 --> 00:11:27,603
-Staci, prepare the field team for war.
-Finally!

258
00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:29,605
Wait, what? War? Why?

259
00:11:29,688 --> 00:11:31,607
Templeton, did you not hear
anything in there?

260
00:11:31,690 --> 00:11:33,651
They just declared war,
and I accepted.

261
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:35,611
No, they didn't. And, no, you didn't!

262
00:11:35,694 --> 00:11:38,114
You guys were all smiles
and decided to hang out and stuff.

263
00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:39,990
[chuckles] CEO speak.

264
00:11:40,074 --> 00:11:42,034
Executives never say what they mean.

265
00:11:42,118 --> 00:11:45,621
"We're giving you a title promotion"
equals "You don't get a raise."

266
00:11:45,704 --> 00:11:49,041
"Workforce imbalance correction"
equals mass firings.

267
00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:51,460
"Let's make these get-togethers
a regular event" equals...

268
00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:54,171
[grunting, choking]

269
00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:55,923
[gasps] We can't let them do that!

270
00:11:56,173 --> 00:11:57,383
And we won't.

271
00:11:57,466 --> 00:11:59,468
This is what we train for, babies!

272
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,178
Light a fire in your guts

273
00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:04,807
and let it burn till our enemies smolder
in the shame of surrender!

274
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:08,519
-Baby Corp is going to war!
-[cheering]

275
00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:11,772
[Emiliano] I cannot sign off
on these war plans.

276
00:12:11,856 --> 00:12:14,233
Sir, I assure you
they're strategically sound.

277
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,277
I'm sure they're very good.

278
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,654
It's the war itself I cannot approve.

279
00:12:18,737 --> 00:12:20,823
Mr. Chairman, wh-why not?

280
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:22,408
Le lait de la maison.

281
00:12:22,491 --> 00:12:25,536
Would monsieur care to open up
the flavor with a knock-knock?

282
00:12:25,619 --> 00:12:27,163
Thank you, Dondre.

283
00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:33,085
[crying]

284
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,337
Exquisite.

285
00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:38,007
War is a nasty business, Boss Baby.

286
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:43,387
It's not for me to say "why not?"
but for you to prove "why should we?"

287
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:45,389
They-- The blip! Baby love!

288
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:46,348
You saw the blip!

289
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:49,185
You want to go to war over a blip?

290
00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:51,604
Do we even know
that Pyg and Tam caused it?

291
00:12:51,812 --> 00:12:54,982
Well, not know-know,
but I just... know, you know?

292
00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:56,275
They're planning something.

293
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:59,820
And if our love is attacked,
we will fight back and win.

294
00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:03,449
But Baby Corp does not start wars.

295
00:13:03,532 --> 00:13:05,075
The answer is no.

296
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:07,536
[groans]

297
00:13:08,454 --> 00:13:10,956
Look how stressed this war talk makes you.

298
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,709
You haven't even touched
your puffy snacks.

299
00:13:13,792 --> 00:13:16,879
Can I give you some advice?
Take up a hobby.

300
00:13:16,962 --> 00:13:18,672
I make yarn puppets.

301
00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:21,467
This one is me
and this one is my twin brother

302
00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:23,135
Board Baby Hermano Menor!

303
00:13:23,427 --> 00:13:26,096
"Hola, mi hermano."
"Hola, mi hermano."

304
00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:27,932
"Let us do business together."

305
00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:30,100
Clickety-clickety-click ka-ching!

306
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:32,019
Clickety-clickety-click ka-ching!

307
00:13:35,022 --> 00:13:36,982
-[fabric tears]
-[all gasping, screaming]

308
00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:41,237
And that's how you eviscerate a goat
with a toy block.

309
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:43,906
-[Boss Baby] Staci--
-I'm not saying we're gonna.

310
00:13:44,406 --> 00:13:46,784
Emiliano says we can't make
the first strike.

311
00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:49,328
[Staci groaning]

312
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:53,082
He thinks I'm stressed and overreacting,
suggested I take up a hobby.

313
00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,918
What if your hobby
is ignoring suggestions?

314
00:13:56,043 --> 00:13:57,711
So, you're not going to war?

315
00:13:57,878 --> 00:13:59,088
Well...

316
00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:01,882
Emiliano just said
we couldn't strike first,

317
00:14:01,966 --> 00:14:04,260
so I'm thinking
I actually will take up a hobby.

318
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:08,931
Annoying Pyg and Tam
until they hit us first.

319
00:14:09,014 --> 00:14:10,683
Then we can get away
with whatever we want.

320
00:14:10,766 --> 00:14:11,809
-Ooh!
-[toy squeaks]

321
00:14:11,892 --> 00:14:14,436
That's the most little-brother thing
you've ever said.

322
00:14:16,105 --> 00:14:19,525
So glad we could
finally get together like this!

323
00:14:19,733 --> 00:14:24,280
"We look forward to a pleasurable match
and a healthy exchange of ideas.

324
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:25,406
Kingfisher blue club."

325
00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:26,615
Right away, Mr. Tam.

326
00:14:27,074 --> 00:14:28,617
-What do you recommend?
-Putter.

327
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:29,743
Doi. It's minigolf.

328
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:33,080
I mean for Operation:
Drive These Two Yahoos to War.

329
00:14:33,163 --> 00:14:34,248
Ah, yes.

330
00:14:34,331 --> 00:14:38,127
May I recommend a "baby likes
the shiny golf ball" interruption?

331
00:14:38,210 --> 00:14:39,336
Excellent choice.

332
00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:40,421
Jimbo?

333
00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:51,765
Ooh! [giggles]

334
00:14:52,057 --> 00:14:54,184
[scoffs] Babies, am I right?

335
00:14:54,268 --> 00:14:56,979
"Return the ball to me, infant."

336
00:14:58,480 --> 00:14:59,899
[blows raspberry]

337
00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:02,109
[grumbles]

338
00:15:04,194 --> 00:15:07,239
-Watch out for Tam's club, innocent baby!
-[woman gasps]

339
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:09,909
-[whimpers]
-[bleats]

340
00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:13,996
-Did you see that?
-[bleats]

341
00:15:14,079 --> 00:15:16,916
Pyg just saved that kid
from a flying club!

342
00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:19,043
They really do love babies!

343
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,630
[babies giggling]

344
00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:25,507
Who do you like in the fifth race,
CEO friend?

345
00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:29,929
-I'm thinking sea tortoise, but--
-"Mm, I like the narwhal."

346
00:15:30,346 --> 00:15:33,182
You're missing the action,
other CEO friend!

347
00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:35,893
What you got, real estate section? Fun!

348
00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:38,979
I should warn you, we babies have
very short attention spans.

349
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,148
-Front page!
-[high-pitched voice] "Real estate!"

350
00:15:41,231 --> 00:15:43,525
I hear ya. Gotta diversify investments.

351
00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:45,194
-Local sports!
-"Real estate!"

352
00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:46,195
[Jimbo] Garbage!

353
00:15:46,528 --> 00:15:49,031
[laughing]

354
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,158
Look out, baby who did nothing wrong!

355
00:15:51,241 --> 00:15:53,077
I think Pyg's about to...

356
00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:54,912
Oh, wow.

357
00:15:54,995 --> 00:15:56,330
He will just eat anything.

358
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:59,541
-[baby cooing, squeals]
-[growls, bleats]

359
00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:02,586
This famous goat just saved my baby
from eating trash

360
00:16:02,670 --> 00:16:04,797
that I saw a dirty baby dump out!

361
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:07,633
By the way, I love your show!

362
00:16:08,509 --> 00:16:09,843
Sorry, Boss.

363
00:16:09,927 --> 00:16:12,930
Don't worry, big guy.
Pyg and Tam will crack.

364
00:16:13,013 --> 00:16:15,766
We just need to bring in
the really annoying babies.

365
00:16:15,849 --> 00:16:18,644
-[music playing]
-[door opens]

366
00:16:19,353 --> 00:16:21,772
See? Pyg and Tam love for us to visit.

367
00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,399
We're VIPs!

368
00:16:23,482 --> 00:16:25,943
Since you guys love babies so much,

369
00:16:26,235 --> 00:16:29,989
I thought I'd bring a few along
for today's CEO hangout. [chuckles]

370
00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:32,700
[babies giggling]

371
00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:34,994
[woman] Come back here, Scooter!

372
00:16:35,244 --> 00:16:36,620
[giggling]

373
00:16:37,121 --> 00:16:39,665
-[bleats]
-[man] I am so sorry.

374
00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:42,418
Get back here. Get back here!

375
00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:44,753
Staci, get the teams ready.

376
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,380
War's a-comin'.

377
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,007
-[cooing]
-[Tam growls]

378
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:55,889
Who's got the squirmy, squamy squirmies
like a giggly gaggly wormy?

379
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,684
♪ Ah, wiggle, go wiggle ♪

380
00:16:58,767 --> 00:17:00,769
♪ Can you giggle when you wiggle? ♪

381
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,271
[giggling]

382
00:17:02,354 --> 00:17:03,439
♪ Then listen to me ♪

383
00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:05,941
♪ When you wiggle like a wormy
Then you giggle 'cause you're squirmy ♪

384
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:08,318
♪ And you figure that the giggle
In the wiggles that you waggle ♪

385
00:17:08,402 --> 00:17:11,155
♪ Make the squirmy wormy giggle
And you wiggle some more ♪

386
00:17:11,989 --> 00:17:16,785
That's right!
Now everybody hug everybody!

387
00:17:17,661 --> 00:17:20,706
Look how much they love babies,

388
00:17:20,914 --> 00:17:23,751
even when the babies are naughty
and don't deserve it.

389
00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:27,296
[growls, grumbles]

390
00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:30,716
-Hey! That's my hat!
-[grunts]

391
00:17:31,383 --> 00:17:35,929
I know we can beat them in open war
if Emiliano would just give us permission!

392
00:17:36,013 --> 00:17:39,767
How do we annoy Pyg and Tam
into making the first strike?

393
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:42,770
You're gonna have to peel the fans off
with a spatula!

394
00:17:42,853 --> 00:17:45,105
[gasps] Templeton, you genius!

395
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:49,568
What? No, I was just talking to myself
about how handsome I am in this hat.

396
00:17:49,651 --> 00:17:51,278
Look how it hugs my head.

397
00:17:51,361 --> 00:17:53,238
Templeton, you accidental genius!

398
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:56,658
All I have to do is peel those two away
from their gushing public,

399
00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:59,328
set them free to be their awful selves.

400
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:00,496
Ooh, it's risky.

401
00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:03,290
If it goes wrong,
my career is in the potty for sure.

402
00:18:03,373 --> 00:18:07,336
But I know exactly where to hold
our next CEO get-together.

403
00:18:09,379 --> 00:18:10,464
-[elevator dings]
-[all gasp]

404
00:18:10,547 --> 00:18:11,632
Oh, my!

405
00:18:15,177 --> 00:18:19,098
Sir, you brought
those bogus baby lovers here?

406
00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:20,891
Why, yes, I did, Staci.

407
00:18:20,974 --> 00:18:23,685
A place with no fans,
no reason to hold back,

408
00:18:23,769 --> 00:18:26,396
and no filter between our new friends,

409
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:30,943
and an office full of loud,
bratty, stinking babies!

410
00:18:31,235 --> 00:18:32,528
"We'll take it."

411
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:34,154
Excuse me?

412
00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:37,366
Mr. Pyg and Mr. Tam would like
to purchase this location.

413
00:18:37,699 --> 00:18:39,159
-What?
-You can't!

414
00:18:39,868 --> 00:18:42,913
"Your office shall be
our new production hub.

415
00:18:42,996 --> 00:18:46,208
It has it all: huge windows
with natural light!"

416
00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:47,334
-[bleats]
-"Want!"

417
00:18:47,417 --> 00:18:51,463
"A factory downstairs to churn out
merchandise and accessories."

418
00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:52,673
-[head thuds]
-"Want!"

419
00:18:52,756 --> 00:18:54,842
"Chupie transport technology!

420
00:18:54,925 --> 00:18:56,635
The possibilities are endless!"

421
00:18:56,927 --> 00:18:58,929
-[bleats]
-[high-pitched voice] "Bored!"

422
00:18:59,179 --> 00:19:00,264
[whimpers]

423
00:19:00,597 --> 00:19:02,975
[normal voice]
"Pyg is the real estate expert.

424
00:19:03,058 --> 00:19:06,687
He knew straightaway
when Bug told us about this office.

425
00:19:06,895 --> 00:19:10,732
But I needed to be convinced,
see the place for myself.

426
00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:14,194
So, we figured
just annoy our enemy enough,

427
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:18,115
and he's bound to crack
and give us what we want."

428
00:19:18,407 --> 00:19:20,242
What a great plan!

429
00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:23,829
Ohhh-kay.

430
00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:27,875
Well played,
but this office isn't for sale.

431
00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:29,710
[snarls]

432
00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:33,630
Mr. Tam and Mr. Pyg feel
that's not your decision to make,

433
00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:36,592
so we will make
our very generous sales pitch

434
00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:39,261
directly to your board, if you don't mind.

435
00:19:40,304 --> 00:19:42,347
Sir, it's lose-lose.

436
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:45,934
If the board doesn't fire you
for bringing them here in the first place,

437
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:49,605
there's still a chance they say "yes"
and we're all out of a job!

438
00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:52,524
-I'll take my chances.
-[all gasping]

439
00:19:55,527 --> 00:19:56,361
Welcome.

440
00:19:56,445 --> 00:20:00,616
I confess, I was surprised to hear you
were in our offices.

441
00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:05,579
But in the spirit
of our mutual love of babies,

442
00:20:05,662 --> 00:20:08,790
let us break bread
and speak of business together.

443
00:20:09,082 --> 00:20:11,293
"The honor is ours."

444
00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:14,254
This board will hear your purchase offer

445
00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:17,549
and will give it
the full consideration it deserv-- [gasps]

446
00:20:17,633 --> 00:20:20,719
What the heck is that goat
doing to my mitten puppet?

447
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:26,058
[screams] Is that me in the goat's mouth?
Or you?

448
00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:28,185
I can't tell us apart in puppet form!

449
00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:31,313
-[bleats]
-"Hungry!"

450
00:20:31,563 --> 00:20:33,357
[sighs]

451
00:20:33,732 --> 00:20:35,734
Absolutely appalling.

452
00:20:35,817 --> 00:20:39,363
I guess they felt free
to be their awful selves.

453
00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:40,906
[snarls]

454
00:20:41,531 --> 00:20:46,078
You come in here and disrespect
a creation of my hands and my heart.

455
00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:49,957
So long as you own a fraction
of a sliver of the world's love,

456
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:51,416
make no mistake,

457
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:54,503
we are at war!

458
00:20:54,795 --> 00:20:56,755
Outstanding call, sir.

459
00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:58,215
War on, Staci!

460
00:20:58,298 --> 00:21:00,217
Release the photos.

461
00:21:00,509 --> 00:21:02,010
-"What photos?"
-[bleats]

462
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:05,639
-[high-pitched voice] "Confused."
-Staci took up a hobby, too.

463
00:21:05,722 --> 00:21:07,599
Paparazzi photojournalism.

464
00:21:07,683 --> 00:21:10,644
Good luck squirmy-wormy squiggling
your way out of this one.

465
00:21:10,852 --> 00:21:12,229
War over.

466
00:21:12,562 --> 00:21:16,108
[Marsha Krinkle] Pyg and Tam
have built an empire on loving babies,

467
00:21:16,191 --> 00:21:19,569
but these photos depict anything but love.

468
00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:22,572
Maria-Maria,
what do you have to say for these two?

469
00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:24,324
What do you have to say?

470
00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:25,909
I don't have to say anything.

471
00:21:26,159 --> 00:21:27,911
-Exactly.
-Say what?

472
00:21:28,078 --> 00:21:29,997
That's what I'm saying.

473
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:33,917
Look, Pyg and Tam never claimed
to be role models.

474
00:21:34,001 --> 00:21:37,337
They never said they "love babies."

475
00:21:37,421 --> 00:21:41,883
I believe the actual name of the show
is Pyg & Tam Love Babies.

476
00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:43,427
Angie, can we check on that?

477
00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:44,511
Yeah. Yeah.

478
00:21:44,594 --> 00:21:45,929
It is the name of the show.

479
00:21:46,221 --> 00:21:48,056
Are we about names now?

480
00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:51,310
Pyg and Tam reject society's labels.

481
00:21:51,393 --> 00:21:53,854
They're not
some wiggly-giggly playmate.

482
00:21:53,937 --> 00:21:57,566
No, they're the original
bad boys of media.

483
00:21:57,649 --> 00:21:59,818
I see a lifestyle brand.

484
00:21:59,901 --> 00:22:02,404
And I don't know if people
are ready for Pyg and Tam,

485
00:22:02,487 --> 00:22:05,782
but they are ready for Pyg and Tam.

486
00:22:07,534 --> 00:22:09,036
Do you sell hats?

487
00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:10,454
[snarling softly]

488
00:22:10,537 --> 00:22:13,999
"Yes, but you can only wear them
backwards."

489
00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:15,208
So cool.

490
00:22:15,459 --> 00:22:17,002
Oh, come on!

491
00:22:17,085 --> 00:22:19,755
Spun better
than a nuclear washing machine.

492
00:22:19,838 --> 00:22:22,591
I'm sorry in advance,
but I am gonna buy one of those hats.

493
00:22:22,674 --> 00:22:23,508
Tim, no!

494
00:22:23,717 --> 00:22:24,676
It's okay, big guy.

495
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:28,347
Maybe it's not "war over" yet,
but we knocked 'em back a while.

496
00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:31,433
It'll take Pyg and Tam
some time to rebrand.

497
00:22:31,516 --> 00:22:34,019
And when they do come back,
we'll be ready.

498
00:22:34,102 --> 00:22:36,980
Assuming I figure out how to finish off
this replacement yarn doll

499
00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:38,023
so I don't get fired.

500
00:22:38,106 --> 00:22:39,608
-Um, anybody know how to--
-[fabric tears]

501
00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:42,277
-[Jimbo screams]
-[Boss Baby] Nope, there goes the head.

502
00:22:43,361 --> 00:22:45,864
[theme music playing]

503
00:23:05,133 --> 00:23:07,260
♪ Boss Baby ♪