1 00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:15,063 -[boy grunts] -[phone dings] 2 00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:16,600 Hold all my calls. 3 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,810 -[giggling] -[lullaby plays] 4 00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:21,484 ♪ Boss Baby ♪ 5 00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:25,443 ♪ I'm the Boss, Boss Baby, boss, boss Boss Baby, boss, boss ♪ 6 00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:28,065 ♪ Watch a itty-bitty kid get large ♪ 7 00:00:28,153 --> 00:00:30,703 ♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪ 8 00:00:30,780 --> 00:00:33,160 ♪ Stroller rolling Up and down the boulevard ♪ 9 00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:35,743 ♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪ 10 00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:39,082 ♪ I run this house, I rule this crib ♪ 11 00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:41,624 ♪ Change my diaper, son Where's my bib? ♪ 12 00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:44,418 ♪ Don't pacify You just got to pay me ♪ 13 00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:46,962 -♪ Who's in charge? ♪ -♪ Me, the Boss Baby ♪ 14 00:00:49,966 --> 00:00:50,796 [stapler clicks] 15 00:00:53,428 --> 00:00:54,258 [stapler clicks] 16 00:00:56,931 --> 00:00:57,771 [stapler clicks] 17 00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:01,185 -[thuds] -[stapler clicks] 18 00:01:01,269 --> 00:01:02,149 [thumping] 19 00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:04,809 [thuds, clicks, thumping] 20 00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:08,570 [rhythmic noises continue] 21 00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:09,861 -What are you doing? -Aah! 22 00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:11,324 How long have you been listening? 23 00:01:11,404 --> 00:01:13,414 Long enough to make us feel weird. You coming home? 24 00:01:13,823 --> 00:01:15,703 Now? Why would I come home now? 25 00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:17,664 You seriously don't remember? 26 00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,004 Mom and Dad's anniversary! 27 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,369 You promised weeks ago you'd help with a gift. 28 00:01:21,456 --> 00:01:22,286 That's today? 29 00:01:22,373 --> 00:01:24,713 I mean... that's today? Yay! 30 00:01:25,460 --> 00:01:26,920 -You forgot. -Never! 31 00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:28,960 I-I'm just wrapping up here, 32 00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:31,337 then I'm home to wrap up that birthday gift. 33 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:34,264 -Anniversary. -Which is a relationship birthday. 34 00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:35,724 Leave! 35 00:01:36,095 --> 00:01:38,175 Top five power ties for winter. 36 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:40,020 -Ooh! -Now! 37 00:01:41,017 --> 00:01:43,597 -[elevator bell dings] -[preek] I don't like to do that! 38 00:01:43,686 --> 00:01:46,686 -[puppies barking, snarling] -[preeks babbling] 39 00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:49,730 -[knocks] -Hey, Boss. Cookie? 40 00:01:49,818 --> 00:01:50,858 [Boss] I'm headed out. 41 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,954 You guys are my eyes and ears while I'm gone. 42 00:01:53,029 --> 00:01:55,029 Just keep everybody pushing for Yellow 100. 43 00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:56,615 -[barking] -[Chip wailing] 44 00:01:56,699 --> 00:01:58,829 You plan on clearing those puppies and preeks 45 00:01:58,910 --> 00:02:00,870 out of the office any time soon? 46 00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:02,077 I'm working on it. 47 00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:03,578 -Hmm! -I am! 48 00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:06,460 I'm as bothered by this renter situation as the rest of you. 49 00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:11,593 Oh, yeah, I bet it's really hard up in that CEO ivory tower. 50 00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:13,803 It's mostly sandalwood and marble tile. 51 00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:19,183 But down here, the rest of us come to work every day in a stinking disaster zone! 52 00:02:19,264 --> 00:02:20,894 "Disaster zone," Stace? 53 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:22,434 That's a little dramatic. 54 00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:24,394 -[barking] -D'oh... 55 00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:27,017 -Give me back my shoe, you dingus! -[barking] 56 00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:30,982 ♪ I love ice cream, it's so good ♪ 57 00:02:31,234 --> 00:02:34,574 I actually put in a transfer request to Baby Corp Wichita. 58 00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:36,244 Wichita? What do you do there? 59 00:02:36,322 --> 00:02:38,282 Not deal with puppies and preeks. 60 00:02:38,366 --> 00:02:40,076 -Good point. -Makes sense. 61 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,080 It's bad enough that babies would rather work in Wichita? 62 00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:45,043 The Tulsa of Kansas? 63 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,788 We have to fix this, ASAP! 64 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,585 So, you'll kick the puppies out? 65 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:49,538 I wish. 66 00:02:49,627 --> 00:02:51,337 That rental agreement is airtight. 67 00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:53,381 Baby Houdini couldn't get out of it. 68 00:02:53,464 --> 00:02:56,384 No, I'm gonna boost morale! 69 00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:58,847 [Tim] After we do our thing, right? 70 00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:01,096 -Aah! -Bye, Tim. 71 00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:04,730 The one day I can't ditch Templeton is the one day I can't ditch Baby Corp. 72 00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:07,019 If only I could be in two places at once. 73 00:03:07,103 --> 00:03:08,613 No, that's madness. 74 00:03:08,688 --> 00:03:12,068 I'd need an exact doppelganger, someone so attuned to my mannerisms, 75 00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:15,950 their every word and action would mirror my own in perfect synchronicity! 76 00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:16,859 [sneezes] 77 00:03:16,946 --> 00:03:18,236 -Gesundheit! -Bless you! 78 00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:20,445 Ah, close enough. 79 00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:25,368 The A to Z's on everything Timmy T, 80 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:28,075 from food preferences specific to time and temperature, 81 00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:30,836 to a list of names that make him giggle for no reason. 82 00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:32,419 Spoiler: number one is Yolanda. 83 00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:34,342 -[laughs] -Right? [laughs] 84 00:03:34,422 --> 00:03:35,382 The kid knows funny. 85 00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:38,088 Do I really need a whole dossier on your brother? 86 00:03:38,176 --> 00:03:41,006 The job is to help him make an anniversary gift, right? 87 00:03:41,095 --> 00:03:44,675 Oh, Hendershot, so blissfully naive in the art of brotherhood. 88 00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:46,941 Sure, Templeton seems easy. 89 00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:48,653 He's adorable, loves pizza, 90 00:03:48,728 --> 00:03:51,808 and his favorite hobby is, and I quote, "family stuff." 91 00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:54,980 But he's also one giant, emotional volcano 92 00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,398 that could blow any minute! 93 00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:57,776 "Tee-hee-hee! 94 00:03:57,862 --> 00:03:58,912 Aah! 95 00:03:58,988 --> 00:04:02,028 Oh! Rawr! Ha ha!" 96 00:04:02,533 --> 00:04:05,703 -[sighs] Sorry, I love those things. -Always got your back, Beebs. 97 00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:08,037 -When do I start? -Twenty minutes ago! 98 00:04:08,122 --> 00:04:10,792 See you when the job is done. 99 00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:15,340 -[elevator bell dings] -Now, time to boost some office morale. 100 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:16,711 Jimbo, uppies! 101 00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:19,838 Jimbo, crayon! 102 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,390 -[clinks] -Baby Corp! 103 00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:24,557 Epic cupcake party! 104 00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:26,979 Five minutes from now, in Conference Room B. 105 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:29,638 Why? 'Cause that's the kind of boss I am. 106 00:04:29,727 --> 00:04:31,597 -Ooh, sounds fun! -Oh, I love cupcakes! 107 00:04:33,481 --> 00:04:34,441 Took you long enough. 108 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,824 [Hendershot] Sorry, traffic was a nightmare. 109 00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:38,031 Where's my brother? 110 00:04:38,194 --> 00:04:42,284 Problem at work, so he asked me to step in and help with this anniversary gift. 111 00:04:43,032 --> 00:04:44,492 Ugh! 112 00:04:44,575 --> 00:04:45,905 Uh... 113 00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:48,414 Sure, I'll just work with the baby my dumb brother sent 114 00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:52,501 because he's too dumb busy to do the thing he dumb promised he'd dumb do! 115 00:04:52,583 --> 00:04:54,173 He might be CEO at Baby Corp, 116 00:04:54,252 --> 00:04:58,922 but here at Home Corp, he's C-E-- C-E-- He's lame! 117 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:02,177 -[objects rattling] -Is this Football Mike? 118 00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:05,970 I've always wanted to play with one of these, but never actually held one. 119 00:05:06,055 --> 00:05:09,135 What? You've never played Sack Sack Fumble Fumble? 120 00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:11,015 The number one game with two names? 121 00:05:11,102 --> 00:05:12,022 We have to play! 122 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:15,516 Mm! I feel like a dang wizard. 123 00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,857 [chatter] 124 00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:21,449 Nicely done, BB! 125 00:05:21,529 --> 00:05:23,529 Seems like everyone's having a good time. 126 00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:24,874 Good time? 127 00:05:24,949 --> 00:05:28,159 This party's more fun than high-yield asset divestiture! 128 00:05:28,244 --> 00:05:31,214 Check it out. Light-hearted office banter: two o'clock. 129 00:05:31,581 --> 00:05:34,831 Who has ten thumbs and doesn't know which ones are thumbs? 130 00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:37,747 -This baby! -[babies laugh] 131 00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:39,627 Weekend planning: five o'clock. 132 00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:41,591 -Weekend plans? -Not yet. 133 00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:42,884 -You? -Same. 134 00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:44,427 I hear you, girlfriend. 135 00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:46,434 Puppies growling: ten o'clock. 136 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:47,596 [growling] 137 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,850 Wait, what the--? 138 00:05:49,265 --> 00:05:51,095 [snarling, snorting] 139 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,944 -What do you mean you booked the room? -[babies grumbling] 140 00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,400 Disappointed babies leaving at all the clocks! 141 00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:58,435 No, no, no, no, no! 142 00:05:58,524 --> 00:06:00,324 I'm not done boosting corporate morale! 143 00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:03,111 I still have to give a speech that's interrupted by some lackey 144 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:06,616 shouting out an old inside joke that we all laugh at unnecessarily! 145 00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:09,449 [Peg] Someone's got their diaper in a bunch... again. 146 00:06:09,535 --> 00:06:10,825 [laughs] 147 00:06:10,912 --> 00:06:13,082 -Not now, Peg! -Sorry, BB. 148 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:16,381 Guess that's just the way things go around here these days. 149 00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:18,001 Well, that stops now. 150 00:06:18,878 --> 00:06:19,958 We're not going anywhere! 151 00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:21,586 Everyone with an opposable thumb, 152 00:06:21,672 --> 00:06:24,632 turn around, pick up a cupcake, and stay put. 153 00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:27,347 You mean this baby? 154 00:06:27,428 --> 00:06:28,638 -Aha! -[babies laugh] 155 00:06:29,013 --> 00:06:31,223 -[grunting] -We're not leaving. 156 00:06:31,307 --> 00:06:33,727 [snarling, grunting] 157 00:06:33,976 --> 00:06:37,356 And you can have the room you booked... when we're done with it. 158 00:06:37,522 --> 00:06:39,862 Oh! Did he really just say that? 159 00:06:39,941 --> 00:06:41,781 [snarling, grunting] 160 00:06:41,859 --> 00:06:44,449 [scoffs] No, we're not just having a party. 161 00:06:44,529 --> 00:06:47,409 This is a very important company meeting. [chuckling] 162 00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:50,410 The cupcakes are a... business metaphor. 163 00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:51,873 Isn't that right, guys? 164 00:06:51,953 --> 00:06:55,083 [babies snickering and agreeing] 165 00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:59,461 As I was saying, a great business, like a great cupcake, 166 00:06:59,544 --> 00:07:02,514 will sprinkle shareholders with dividends. 167 00:07:02,588 --> 00:07:04,628 [babies laughing] 168 00:07:04,715 --> 00:07:06,175 [Bug snarling, grunting] 169 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:07,639 [Simmons] He's a riot! 170 00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:11,472 I want you to eat the cupcake at the rate baby love grew in Q2. 171 00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:13,683 -[munches] -[Boss] Slower. 172 00:07:13,891 --> 00:07:15,561 Cold months, stuck indoors. 173 00:07:15,643 --> 00:07:16,943 Lots of baby time. Slower. 174 00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:18,441 But then it's spring! 175 00:07:18,521 --> 00:07:20,271 Rain season. Babies splashing in puddles. 176 00:07:20,356 --> 00:07:21,766 So cute! So much baby love! 177 00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:22,978 Faster! Faster! 178 00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:27,160 They're still trying to get in. 179 00:07:27,363 --> 00:07:28,413 [snarling] 180 00:07:28,739 --> 00:07:32,329 -Are you sure you can keep this up? -I have to. [gulps] 181 00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:33,870 People are counting on me. 182 00:07:34,328 --> 00:07:35,498 [strains] 183 00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,790 This plan is madness, Dr. No-Sho-Bot! 184 00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:40,424 The Earth needs sunlight to tell time so people can show up 185 00:07:40,501 --> 00:07:41,841 for stuff they agreed to do! 186 00:07:41,919 --> 00:07:43,549 [electronic hum] 187 00:07:47,675 --> 00:07:48,545 All right, then. 188 00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:52,564 Since you like sunblock so much, you're about to get smothered with SPF 2. 189 00:07:52,722 --> 00:07:53,932 As in the two of us! 190 00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,345 Lance, now! 191 00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:57,306 I'm doing space stuff! 192 00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:03,478 That's right! It's me, Lance Windsorknot! 193 00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:05,735 More space stuff! 194 00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:06,902 Angry squirrel! 195 00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:10,196 Wait, we're fighting Angry Squirrel? Not Dr. No-Sho-Bot? 196 00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:11,911 No! Actual angry squirrel! 197 00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:14,911 -[shouting, grunting] -[squirrel chittering] 198 00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:17,464 -[laughs] That was awesome! -Right? 199 00:08:17,538 --> 00:08:19,748 Almost as fun as listening to all your invention ideas 200 00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:21,132 and playing Get That Baby! 201 00:08:21,876 --> 00:08:23,626 Ten times. I counted. 202 00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:27,051 It's like you know exactly what I love to do, and you keep suggesting it! 203 00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:29,125 I know. Crazy. 204 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:32,047 I was thinking for our next mission, though, we could maybe-- 205 00:08:32,136 --> 00:08:34,346 Take on an intergalactic chore monster? 206 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:36,637 Or an intergalactic toffee stealer? 207 00:08:36,724 --> 00:08:40,064 -Or-- -An intergalactic anniversary gift. 208 00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:40,984 I know that mission. 209 00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:42,685 The one where everything's planned, 210 00:08:42,772 --> 00:08:45,732 and then my brother abandons me on planet BP-233. 211 00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:48,490 The BP stands for "broken promises." 212 00:08:48,569 --> 00:08:51,199 The only space missions he cares about are office space missions. 213 00:08:51,572 --> 00:08:53,822 Magic! Show me all the magic! 214 00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:54,873 Great idea! 215 00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:58,201 I'll get my Jonathan Pumpernickel Junior Illusionist Magic Kit! 216 00:08:58,287 --> 00:08:59,117 [sighs] 217 00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,868 [slurring] Sometimes a business is acquired. 218 00:09:02,583 --> 00:09:06,963 And sometimes two businesses can... [gags] merge. 219 00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:09,838 And sometimes... business... 220 00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:11,684 Stuffed. 221 00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:15,301 -[babies gasp] -[groaning] 222 00:09:15,596 --> 00:09:16,886 [echoing] It's too much, Boss! 223 00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:19,353 You can't take any more cupcake business metaphors! 224 00:09:23,813 --> 00:09:25,523 [muffled heartbeats] 225 00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:26,903 Morale. 226 00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:28,435 Morale! 227 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:38,082 [Jimbo] But you can do cupcake sandwich business metaphors! 228 00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:42,292 -You can do it! Come on! -[all cheering] 229 00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:46,882 [grunting] 230 00:09:46,961 --> 00:09:47,801 [both gasp] 231 00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:49,630 -[babies groan] -Aw, man. 232 00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:54,045 [Boss grunting] 233 00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:56,215 Of course! A cupcake sandwich! 234 00:09:56,470 --> 00:09:59,310 Look at this thing. It's teeming with financial metaphors. 235 00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:00,220 Am I right? 236 00:10:00,558 --> 00:10:02,228 -Yeah, yeah, yeah! -Metaphors, ja! 237 00:10:02,351 --> 00:10:05,441 -[Peg] Just teeming! It's teeming, yeah! -[Bug growls] 238 00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:07,481 [Boss] Mmm! 239 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:09,275 -They're gone! -[spits] 240 00:10:09,358 --> 00:10:11,938 Great. I had zero cupcake sandwich metaphors. 241 00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:13,403 Also, I'm very ill. 242 00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:16,696 -Cupcake party on! -[all cheering] 243 00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:21,124 [Tim] Your card is... the queen of hearts! 244 00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:23,211 Nope. 245 00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:25,669 Because it's the two of clubs! 246 00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:27,499 Jack of clubs. 247 00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:28,535 Spades? 248 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,628 Something with a seven. King of hearts? 249 00:10:30,796 --> 00:10:31,706 King of hearts? 250 00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:33,507 Yes! Is it the king of hearts? 251 00:10:33,716 --> 00:10:35,216 It's the king of hearts! 252 00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:37,181 -I knew it! Let me see. -[gasps] 253 00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:38,801 [munching] 254 00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:40,888 Oh, you mean, mm, this card? 255 00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:42,563 [gulps] Oh, my bad. 256 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:46,772 It's okay. My magic tends to make people hungry... for more magic! 257 00:10:49,690 --> 00:10:51,900 Mm, I'd really like to make that anniversary-- 258 00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:56,744 Ladies and gentlemen, for my final trick, I will now read Hendershot's mind. 259 00:10:56,822 --> 00:10:59,492 On the count of six, we will both say the present we're gonna make 260 00:10:59,575 --> 00:11:01,075 for Mom and Dad's anniversary. 261 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:05,710 And if we don't say the same thing, no anniversary gift will be made. 262 00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:07,710 [gasps] Where'd those stakes come from? 263 00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:08,962 -One. -[gasps] 264 00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:10,843 -Gifts, gifts, gifts. -Two, three... 265 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,340 -Oh, why are you saying numbers so fast? -Four. 266 00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:16,093 "Usually it's a snow globe, but it could also be candy." 267 00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:18,678 -Five... six! -[wavering] 268 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:20,511 -Snow globe! -Ca-- Snow globe. 269 00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:21,603 It worked! 270 00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:24,230 Holy heck, that trick never works with my other brother! 271 00:11:24,308 --> 00:11:25,228 I mean, real brother. 272 00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:27,189 I mean-- Snow globe time! 273 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,646 -[monitor chiming] -What's up, Beebs? 274 00:11:30,731 --> 00:11:32,781 -[laughter, chatter] -You guys! 275 00:11:32,858 --> 00:11:34,318 Where's Tim? He's not picking up. 276 00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:36,742 -Here. -Templeton, I'm on my way. 277 00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,821 Also, please don't say "cupcake" for a month. 278 00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:41,486 -You don't have to come. -Tim, I'm coming. I mean it. 279 00:11:41,575 --> 00:11:43,035 And I mean I don't want you to. 280 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,499 Family time isn't something you do when it's convenient. 281 00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:47,079 -Who said it was? -You did. 282 00:11:47,164 --> 00:11:49,674 When you broke your promise to help with this anniversary gift. 283 00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:51,790 Don't worry. Hendershot and I are taking care of it. 284 00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:53,837 You're getting Mom and Dad an upside-down jar? 285 00:11:53,921 --> 00:11:55,011 It's a snow globe! 286 00:11:55,256 --> 00:11:56,506 Looks like an upside-down jar. 287 00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:59,050 It'll start as a jar, but it's gonna end as a snow globe. 288 00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,505 Because that's what we decided at the same time. 289 00:12:01,595 --> 00:12:02,675 Because Hendershot gets me. 290 00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,641 Oh! I see what's happening. 291 00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:09,194 Look, Tim, the only reason Hendershot knows you so well 292 00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:10,650 is because I do. 293 00:12:10,729 --> 00:12:11,979 What are you talking about? 294 00:12:12,189 --> 00:12:13,069 Show him, Hendo. 295 00:12:16,026 --> 00:12:19,606 Everything anyone could ever know about you is in that dossier, 296 00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:22,197 which I wrote, because I pay attention. 297 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:24,703 Because I'm a great brother. 298 00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,249 -[Tim growls] -Hey! That cost a fortune to bind! 299 00:12:27,329 --> 00:12:29,829 You wrote a file on me and gave it to your office buddy, 300 00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:31,785 and you think that makes you a good brother? 301 00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:32,956 I believe I said "great." 302 00:12:33,335 --> 00:12:35,085 Stay at work as long as you want! 303 00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:38,301 You love your job so much, why don't you marry it? [smooching] 304 00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:41,392 "I love you! Let's raise a family of job babies! Mwah!" 305 00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:45,387 Fine! Maybe I'd rather spend time with people who actually appreciate 306 00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:46,523 the hard work I do. 307 00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:47,809 -Good! -Great! 308 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,312 -Cupcake! -[gags] 309 00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:54,016 There are my favorite babies who appreciate everything I do. 310 00:12:54,106 --> 00:12:55,316 You bet we do! 311 00:12:55,399 --> 00:12:56,689 That stand-off, Boss? 312 00:12:56,775 --> 00:12:58,395 [laughs] Ooh, legendary! 313 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,776 Morale could not be higher. 314 00:13:00,946 --> 00:13:03,316 You saying I can't get it higher? I can get it higher. 315 00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:05,527 Because I care about all of you. 316 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,948 In fact, I'll do it right now. 317 00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:08,326 I'm free. I got time. 318 00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:12,496 -You really don't have to. -But I want to, and I will... to. 319 00:13:13,083 --> 00:13:13,963 So... 320 00:13:14,835 --> 00:13:17,665 Sir, is everything all right? 321 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,665 You bet it is! Watch! 322 00:13:20,549 --> 00:13:23,799 I said, "Lady, if you don't land that spoon of pudding in my mouth, 323 00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:25,466 I'm gonna call the FAA!" 324 00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:26,934 Ha! What did she say? 325 00:13:27,014 --> 00:13:29,644 She said... [speaks gibberish] 326 00:13:29,725 --> 00:13:31,475 'cause I broke her brain when I spoke! 327 00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:33,980 [babies laughing] 328 00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:37,937 -You are so good at picking crayons! -Aah! 329 00:13:38,025 --> 00:13:38,895 Thanks! Heh. 330 00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:42,485 Then I said, "Sir, this car seat's not gonna buckle itself!" 331 00:13:42,571 --> 00:13:43,741 Then what did he say? 332 00:13:43,822 --> 00:13:46,782 He was like, um... [speaks gibberish] 333 00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:48,287 'cause his brain was broken! 334 00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:50,663 -Oh, ja. -[forced laughter] 335 00:13:50,996 --> 00:13:54,076 In recognition of her grace under crayon pressure, 336 00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:58,836 this Brass Eagle of Courage goes to R&D Baby Simmons! 337 00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:01,916 [whines] I want one. 338 00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:03,717 -That's not fair! -Where's my Brass Eagle? 339 00:14:03,801 --> 00:14:05,841 -I'm courageous, too! -[babies grumbling] 340 00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:08,758 -Uh, it's fine. I don't need it. -I can fix this. 341 00:14:08,847 --> 00:14:09,807 Uh, good news! 342 00:14:09,932 --> 00:14:11,852 Everyone gets an eagle! 343 00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:13,774 [all cheering] 344 00:14:13,852 --> 00:14:15,482 Now I definitely don't want it. 345 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,113 It's not special anymore. 346 00:14:17,439 --> 00:14:20,359 So, I said, "Sorry, I'm a baby and you're a person, 347 00:14:20,442 --> 00:14:23,902 so your brain is broken." [laughing] 348 00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:27,868 I never thought I'd ask this, but can I please go to work now? 349 00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:31,119 Uh, the puppies are still in Conference Room B, 350 00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,873 so we're meeting in A now. 351 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:34,285 It's fine, NBD. 352 00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:36,923 -Yes, BD! -Ow! Watch it! 353 00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:40,671 Listen up! Peg just told me the puppies have taken back Conference Room B, 354 00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:43,094 where so many fun memories were made earlier! 355 00:14:43,173 --> 00:14:45,513 And she wants us to help her get it back! 356 00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:47,473 -Not what I said! -Her words. 357 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:49,603 And I say we help her! 358 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:53,100 Because we're a corporate family, and family never gives up on each other! 359 00:14:53,183 --> 00:14:54,893 Testify! 360 00:14:54,977 --> 00:14:56,937 -Uh, okay. -Okay. 361 00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:59,021 Now, come on! Hyah! 362 00:15:01,191 --> 00:15:02,031 We need to talk. 363 00:15:02,192 --> 00:15:05,032 About this awesome snow globe? Sure. 364 00:15:05,112 --> 00:15:08,322 I did take a couple creative liberties, but I have a feeling you'll like them. 365 00:15:08,407 --> 00:15:10,027 You don't know what I like! 366 00:15:10,534 --> 00:15:15,214 I know you're mad, but what do you say to pizza with ice cream on top, uh? 367 00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:18,829 I say, "Grumble, grumble," which is stomach for "awesome"! 368 00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:20,134 [gasps] 369 00:15:20,210 --> 00:15:21,670 You're cheating again! 370 00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:25,586 You say cheating, I say distracting in order to refocus on the task at hand. 371 00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:27,474 You know, tomato, tomahto... sauce... 372 00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:28,931 on pizza... with ice cream. 373 00:15:29,011 --> 00:15:30,431 Aah! Stop it! 374 00:15:31,722 --> 00:15:33,352 Go! I want you out! 375 00:15:34,141 --> 00:15:36,061 Look, dude, can we just finish this snow globe? 376 00:15:36,143 --> 00:15:37,773 I just need you to sign it, that's it. 377 00:15:37,853 --> 00:15:39,983 Then the job's done and I'll be out of your hair, okay? 378 00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:41,067 No-kay. 379 00:15:41,148 --> 00:15:43,688 Well, it's no-kay with me to leave a job unfinished. 380 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:46,236 I am Manager Baby Hendershot, baby! 381 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,110 -I deliver! -I'm not signing anything. 382 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,870 -Sign it! -I will not! 383 00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,239 Oh, yes, you will, 384 00:15:51,325 --> 00:15:53,535 right after you forget you're even mad at me! 385 00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:56,119 -Not happening! -Draw Marisol from memory! 386 00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:57,575 I genuinely would love to! 387 00:15:57,665 --> 00:15:59,495 Aah! Stop doing that! 388 00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:02,796 We don't have to dance this cha-cha, my man. 389 00:16:02,878 --> 00:16:05,918 I know you better than you even do, Tim. [echoes] 390 00:16:07,466 --> 00:16:10,256 You do know Tim, but you don't know... 391 00:16:11,011 --> 00:16:11,851 Mit. 392 00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:13,676 What are you doing? 393 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:15,064 Who's Tim? I'm Mit. 394 00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:16,310 I didn't even say "Tim." 395 00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:18,272 Mit doesn't wait for his name to be called. 396 00:16:18,352 --> 00:16:20,982 He's a stone-cold, back-of-the-class delinquent. 397 00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:22,823 Careful! You're gonna break that! 398 00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:24,608 You mean this thing Tim loves? 399 00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,194 Yeah, Mit don't care. 400 00:16:26,402 --> 00:16:27,532 Where's my homework? 401 00:16:28,070 --> 00:16:30,030 [laughs] Ooh-hoo, Mit loves homework. 402 00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,569 I don't know what's happening, but I'm not having it. 403 00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:33,528 Take the pen! 404 00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:35,908 Okay, I won't take the pen. 405 00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,825 I said take the pen! 406 00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:39,293 Right, don't take the pen. 407 00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:40,213 Got it. 408 00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:41,746 That's not what I said! 409 00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,170 Ah, church slacks. 410 00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:46,013 The favorite pants of Mit. 411 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,918 Uncomfortable everywhere is how Mit gets comfortable. 412 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:50,378 I can see how this is fun for you. 413 00:16:50,467 --> 00:16:51,427 This is not fun. 414 00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:53,180 Exactly. What I just said. 415 00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,562 Why don't you see what it says about Mit. 416 00:16:55,639 --> 00:16:57,309 It doesn't say anything about Mit. 417 00:16:57,474 --> 00:17:01,064 Trust me, I studied this thing front to back and back to-- [gasps] 418 00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:03,685 "Mit" is "Tim" back to front! 419 00:17:03,772 --> 00:17:05,232 You're doing opposites, right? 420 00:17:05,441 --> 00:17:06,651 -Wrong. -[growls] 421 00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:07,864 -Stop it! -Keep going? 422 00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:09,647 We are finishing this snow globe 423 00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:13,367 right after we go into the phone book and call everyone named... 424 00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:15,241 Yolanda! 425 00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:24,707 [strained] That's a very normal name. 426 00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:26,803 You weren't saying? 427 00:17:27,087 --> 00:17:28,007 [gasps] 428 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,758 [straining, sighs] 429 00:17:31,133 --> 00:17:31,973 No good. 430 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,681 These doors must lock from the inside. 431 00:17:34,011 --> 00:17:36,061 [knocking] Give us the room! 432 00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:39,393 [snarling] 433 00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:40,805 When you're done with it? 434 00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:43,273 That's my sassy tactic! How dare you? 435 00:17:43,353 --> 00:17:45,733 Sir, Conference Room A is fine. 436 00:17:45,939 --> 00:17:46,819 Fine? 437 00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:48,939 It's got that-- that jiggly door handle! 438 00:17:49,026 --> 00:17:51,946 And I don't know who threw out leftover sushi on a hot Friday night 439 00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:53,949 after the cleaning crew had already come through, 440 00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:55,571 but when the air blows just right... 441 00:17:55,657 --> 00:17:58,287 oh, you better believe you can still smell it. 442 00:17:58,368 --> 00:18:03,288 No, no, no, my superstar employees deserve Conference Room B. 443 00:18:03,373 --> 00:18:05,463 So, if those puppies won't come out, 444 00:18:05,542 --> 00:18:09,462 we'll just come up with a super-fun, morale-boosting way to get them out! 445 00:18:09,546 --> 00:18:10,916 Ooh, I have an idea! 446 00:18:11,173 --> 00:18:13,633 Also, no one else can come up with the solution but me! 447 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:19,683 Boss, is everything all right? 448 00:18:19,765 --> 00:18:21,135 Perfect! Why? 449 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:26,605 I just think this is getting to be a bit much... for everyone. 450 00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:28,904 Do you speak for everyone, Staci? 451 00:18:28,982 --> 00:18:30,232 Yes, she does! 452 00:18:30,317 --> 00:18:31,937 You made us crawl into a vent, 453 00:18:32,027 --> 00:18:35,067 and now I've got two co-workers' butts in my face! 454 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:36,660 Trust me, everyone. 455 00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:37,990 This is going to be great! 456 00:18:38,075 --> 00:18:40,115 One, we're a great team. 457 00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:42,912 Two... we have the element of surprise! 458 00:18:42,996 --> 00:18:44,206 [Boss laughing] 459 00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,957 To conference room victory and the spoils of morale! 460 00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:50,125 Surprise! Aah! 461 00:18:51,004 --> 00:18:55,434 -[groans] -[babies shouting] 462 00:18:55,592 --> 00:18:56,722 -[groans] -[Peg] Great! 463 00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:59,932 Now I've got three co-workers' butts in my face! 464 00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:01,135 [barking] 465 00:19:01,807 --> 00:19:03,767 -[monitor chiming] -Staci, I need backup! 466 00:19:04,268 --> 00:19:06,268 Tim's gone all Opposite Day on me. 467 00:19:06,353 --> 00:19:09,023 I am thirsty for vegetables. 468 00:19:09,898 --> 00:19:12,318 It's messing with my brain, and I love my brain! 469 00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:15,741 Sorry, but we've got our own off-the-wall Templeton to deal with. 470 00:19:15,821 --> 00:19:18,991 [Boss] We didn't fail; we succeeded at making a memory! 471 00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:20,874 -Everyone agree! -[sighs] 472 00:19:20,951 --> 00:19:24,251 Looks like we're both stuck in a Templeton brothers nightmare. 473 00:19:24,913 --> 00:19:25,963 -[gasps] Ow! -[thuds] 474 00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:27,169 My precious brain. 475 00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,079 But also, I have an idea. 476 00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:33,880 Hey, Mit, can you not hand me that dossier? 477 00:19:33,964 --> 00:19:34,974 I cannot. 478 00:19:35,048 --> 00:19:38,928 What if I didn't know a way to not get back at your brother? 479 00:19:39,303 --> 00:19:41,143 I'm not listening. 480 00:19:41,221 --> 00:19:44,351 Did you know there isn't one of these dossiers on BB 481 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:47,773 back at Baby Corp that you could not use to manipulate your brother 482 00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,273 the way he didn't manipulate you? 483 00:19:50,355 --> 00:19:52,315 There isn't? Don't take me to it! 484 00:19:52,399 --> 00:19:54,229 Good! I won't! 485 00:19:56,361 --> 00:19:59,361 I'm sort of confused and I really wanna take off these church slacks. 486 00:19:59,448 --> 00:20:00,738 So, fine, I'm Tim again. 487 00:20:00,824 --> 00:20:02,874 Now, take me to the dossier on my brother. 488 00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:04,486 You're sure this is right? 489 00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:06,248 Oh, yeah. 490 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:11,420 The secret entrance to Conference Room B is definitely this way. 491 00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:13,050 Definitely. 492 00:20:13,128 --> 00:20:16,218 Good! Those puppies are gonna have no idea what hit them! 493 00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:18,838 Then I'll tell them it was me, so they know! 494 00:20:19,051 --> 00:20:21,011 Sir, I have to say something. 495 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:23,644 -You're transferring to Wichita? -What? No! 496 00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,852 You're obsessing over the wrong thing. 497 00:20:25,933 --> 00:20:27,773 The puppies aren't the problem. 498 00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:29,191 Sure seems like they are. 499 00:20:29,269 --> 00:20:31,979 Well, yeah, they're today's problem. 500 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:34,484 But tomorrow it'll just be something else. 501 00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:36,026 Not seeing your point here, Stace. 502 00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:38,029 I can't just ignore today's problem. 503 00:20:38,111 --> 00:20:41,241 -Company morale-- -Is like any other relationship. 504 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:44,453 It's gonna have ups and downs, but you can't try to fix everything 505 00:20:44,534 --> 00:20:48,164 with a few super intense minutes of forced time together. 506 00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:50,417 -That makes a lot of-- -But right now's an exception. 507 00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:52,249 -Jimbo! -Aah! 508 00:20:53,543 --> 00:20:55,213 Hey, not cool! 509 00:20:55,295 --> 00:20:56,665 [sniffs] What is that? 510 00:20:57,047 --> 00:20:59,927 [gasps] Lingering hot weekend trash fish! 511 00:21:00,133 --> 00:21:01,843 This is Conference Room A! 512 00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:04,007 Hey! [shouting] 513 00:21:04,388 --> 00:21:05,218 [growls] 514 00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:08,272 [both] Oh. 515 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:12,190 Whatever's off with you two, it's wreaking havoc with Baby Corp. 516 00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:13,651 So, fix it! 517 00:21:18,860 --> 00:21:21,360 -[both shouting, grunting] -[objects crashing] 518 00:21:22,572 --> 00:21:25,412 Ooh! Is it weird that I feel bad for that chair? 519 00:21:25,492 --> 00:21:27,042 [shouting and crashing continue] 520 00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:28,829 -[blows landing] -[babies] Ooh! 521 00:21:29,204 --> 00:21:31,924 I didn't know an earlobe could bend that way! 522 00:21:32,207 --> 00:21:34,627 -Writing that one down for later. -[crashing] 523 00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:36,300 [Boss and Tim shouting] 524 00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:38,008 -[loud crash] -[babies] Ooh! 525 00:21:41,425 --> 00:21:42,425 Then what did he say? 526 00:21:42,509 --> 00:21:45,009 He said... [speaks gibberish] 527 00:21:45,095 --> 00:21:47,215 'cause I broke his brain when I spoke! 528 00:21:47,389 --> 00:21:49,809 [Boss and Tim laughing] 529 00:21:50,350 --> 00:21:51,230 [clears throat] 530 00:21:51,768 --> 00:21:53,558 Eh, right, apology time. 531 00:21:54,563 --> 00:21:56,233 I've learned a lot today about-- 532 00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:59,355 [Peg] Don't get your diapers in a bunch... again. 533 00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:02,195 [all laughing] 534 00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:04,779 Yeah, you guys get it. My bad. 535 00:22:04,865 --> 00:22:07,235 No more super intense bonding quick fixes. 536 00:22:07,492 --> 00:22:08,742 Take the rest of the day off. 537 00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:11,037 My brother and I have a bar mitzvah to get to. 538 00:22:11,121 --> 00:22:12,371 Anniversary! 539 00:22:12,706 --> 00:22:14,416 [gasps] The gift! We forgot! 540 00:22:14,499 --> 00:22:15,789 [Hendershot] No, we didn't. 541 00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:18,501 But there is one thing left to do. 542 00:22:19,379 --> 00:22:21,419 [wavering] Aah! 543 00:22:21,923 --> 00:22:24,223 -Who tosses two things? -Come on, man! 544 00:22:24,634 --> 00:22:25,934 [Tim] What are we gonna do? 545 00:22:26,178 --> 00:22:30,678 Eh, never underestimate how low parents will set the gifts-from-children bar. 546 00:22:38,231 --> 00:22:39,691 We love it so much! 547 00:22:40,358 --> 00:22:41,398 [Janice] Thank you! 548 00:22:43,361 --> 00:22:44,571 [theme music playing] 549 00:23:05,175 --> 00:23:06,965 ♪ Boss Baby ♪