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(suspenseful music)
- What are you reading, Glory?
- [Glory] When a puppy's running from the bus, daddy.
- What is the square root of 31,329?
- [Glory] 283 and 177.
- Then what is the cubed root of 6,850?
- Mom, 19.
- Right.
Truth, what is the square root of 25?
- Seven.
- Truth.
- What?
What's the square root?
- [Dad] You know that.
(cars crashing)
- [Pastor] Death is thy victory.
Lord we thank you for the gift of your resurrection
and it's promise to us.
Lord, take unto thee the souls of your faithful
Anton and Gabriella Vinci,
eternal rest grant to the oh Lord,
and let perpetual light shine upon them.
May they rest in peace.
In the name of the Father, and of the Son,
and of the Holy Ghost, Amen.
- Amen. - Amen.
- [Cassie] It's just starting to sink in.
I'm gonna miss them so much.
- [Poppy] I just hope the kids will accept me
as their parent, Cassie.
- You'll be great, Poppy.
- I just wish you lived closer.
- I've been offered a position at a law firm here,
so we'll see.
(uplifting music)
- Dudes, check out the kiddie clothes.
- Cute, I love the straps with the buttons on the front.
- Makes it easier to change her diapers.
- Morning class.
- [Student] Morning Professor Goldstein.
- Everybody have your project updates?
- [Students] Boo
(screaming) (heavy guitar music)
- Ms. Vinci.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
- Very well.
Shall we begin?
Well Ms. Vinci, it looks like you're first and only.
- The project I'm developing is an electromagnetic wave
mood variance monitor, or mood gun for short.
It remotely measures primary human emotional levels
or moods with accuracy.
Each emotion generates an internal electromagnetic field
with a slightly different wavelength.
An EM signal beamed toward a person is modulated
by the internal emotional fields and front to back.
The modulated reflective wave is then compared
to pre-programmed parameters
and converted into a pie graph
which each color representing the six basic emotions.
- [Professor Goldstein] Ms. Vinci, can you enlighten us
as to how you differentiated between the emotion fields?
- [Glory] Quite simple, professor,
I've performed extensive tests on multiple volunteers,
exposing them to predetermined situations on video.
As I measured their response,
I noted each emotion generated a specific variance
in the EM field.
- Excellent, Ms. Vinci.
Fascinating project.
Please report to my office after class.
(phone rings)
- Hello?
- [Tom] Mr. Vinci?
- Yeah, it's me.
- [Tom] Tom Blater here, I told you about the rent.
And you're now three months behind.
- Okay, Mr. Blater.
- [Tom] My client has been very patient.
- I had some help.
- [Tom] I'll need the back rent plus next months rent
in two weeks and if you still do it again,
we will follow eviction proceedings.
Do you understand?
(uplifting music)
- Boo.
- Oh my God, Professor, don't do that.
You scared me, don't sneak up on me like that.
- Sorry I'm late.
- Am I in trouble?
- No, providing you keep your retaliation bloodless.
- They're bullies, they deserve it.
- Well, Ms. Vinci to your question,
the faculty were concerned you hadn't applied
to a graduate program.
- I gave it considerable thought, Professor,
but Poppy's getting on in years.
I worry about leaving him alone.
- I see.
I mean you've already identified the potential
for using a ray gun as a medical diagnostic tool.
That alone could qualify you for a fellowship.
- But Professor I just turned 12.
- Chronologically.
- And I'm unaware of any research groups
seeking pre teen staff.
Which grad school wants an adolescent in their program?
I'd be a huge legal liability.
- Maybe, but I'm sure they'd focus on your mental abilities.
You're extraordinary learning capacity.
- So Professor, would I be the researcher
or the lab rat?
- Oh.
Well?
Surprise, surprise.
And we don't have a suitable program for you at this college
so the faculty promoted your abilities elsewhere.
We've received inquiries from three prominent universities
and that came from Stanford U just yesterday.
- Thank you, Professor!
Thank you so, so much!
- It would be tragic to let
this opportunity slip away, Glory.
(techno music)
- Ciao, Dobo, do you wanna keep me company?
How are you my tiny friend?
Guess what?
I have such exciting news to share.
- Nice moves.
The ray gun project looks like it's coming along.
You're ready for me to review?
- I reconfigured the circuitry to increase effective range.
I think I got it now.
- Oh, well it looking real good sweetie.
So, what was that envelope?
Glory, why didn't you tell me?
Stanford invited to Glory to apply
to their graduate research program.
- Hooray, I get the bathroom all to myself.
- Argh, the smelly boy fouls the air.
- Hardy har, at least I changed my underwear this week.
- What are you doing in my lab?
- What's up Truth?
Soon.
Congratulations, mi angela, fantastico.
- I still need to apply.
- That's a formality, they want you.
- But the costs are huge, so it can't happen.
Maybe we could get a patent on the ray gun
and sell the rights, that could pay my costs.
- Well, then you need to finish this.
- [Glory] Stop that.
(driving music)
Here we go, Pops, ready, set.
Totally awesome, what do you feel like right now?
- Hungry.
- What's that?
- It's a pie graph, doofus, it shows Poppy's moods.
What's bugging you, Grandpa?
- Well no, I'm okay.
- Baloney, Pop, look sad is 40 percent.
- He was looking at the family photos this afternoon.
- All right.
All right, you gonna find out anyway.
The lawyer from the home owner's called
and we owe them three month's rent.
- Why didn't you pay?
- I had to pay for the new lab equipment,
I thought it was more important.
Now we got no money.
- So what then?
- I'm gonna get an eviction notice.
- We're being evicted?
Evicted?
- If we cant' pay.
- What's, where are we gonna go, Grandpa?
- I don't know, tutti.
If I can't take care of you,
they could put you both in foster homes
and I couldn't do nothing about it.
- But you're our legal guardian, right?
They can just farm us off to foster parents.
You should call Aunt Cassie.
- But if we could get a patent, huh?
We could make enough dough to pay the rent
and your tuition and we wouldn't need a lawyer.
- How do we do that?
(pounding on door)
- Where's our money, Giuseppe?
- Kitchen.
- Gotta stash in a cookie jar?
- Yeah, cookies are a buck each.
- You're two weeks behind dead beat.
There better be 10 grand in that jar.
Get him up, Bones.
Where's the rest?
- That's all I got, Mosey.
- This just covers the vig, and you still owe 60 large.
We're gonna need 10 grand next week
plus a grand for the vig or
- We play batting practice with your knees.
- Come on, Mosey.
I'm behind in the rent and I gotta take care of my kids.
- [Bones] Then you better sell a freaking kidney.
- Bad Grandpa.
I'll give you another week,
but you better find the dough, capiche?
- Hey boss.
This looks interesting.
(upbeat ukulele music)
- Hi sweetie, how was class today?
- Guess what?
Professor Goldstein's going to contact Stanford
and see if they can offer me a scholarship.
- Oh Glory, that's fantastic.
- He said no promises, but it's worth a try.
I'm gonna finish my mood gun.
They may want an example of my work.
- Okay.
Okay, Truth, you ready?
Here come a Pop fly.
(upbeat ukulele music)
(screaming)
- What's happening?
- The gun doesn't work anymore?
See, not working you clumsy, smelly, idiot.
- Hey, stop screaming before my head explodes, okay?
- Not okay, no baseball in my lab ever, understood?
- Hey, whoa, what the hell?
I thought you said it didn't work anymore?
- This isn't mood in flow.
- Is it fixed?
- It appears the mood gun has run Poppy's credit card data.
- Fantastico.
- I need to work on this.
(techno music)
Mood gun, functional.
Digital data reader, functional.
(shouting)
- I didn't do anything, sis.
- You okay?
- [Glory] I found another function for the ray gun.
- So you were celebrating?
- No, the ray gun made me ticklish all over
and I couldn't control myself.
- Oh mia, what next?
Can you do it to me?
- Sure, hold on to your pants.
(laughing)
And that boys, was the low power setting.
- That's three beers, Gramps.
- I'm celebrating.
(belches)
- What for?
- Glory's new invention.
- Which function do you think will be more popular?
- Well, the mood function is good for medical
and the tickle function could replace stun guns.
But a credit card reader could be huge.
- Someone could use it for illegal purposes.
- Well yeah, you're right, we don't want no trouble, but
credit card reader could be used by
by businesses like a busy super market.
You don't have to take out your card,
they just scan you with the credit card reader.
- But it reads all the cards.
How do they know which one to charge?
- They ask of course.
- What if it reads someone else's cards?
- Free food.
- But seriously, this function crosses into identity theft.
- What happened from the original design?
- Well, the impact disconnect the front
and linear integrator and converted from mood gun
to card reader.
So I installed a rotary switch that
manually performs the bypass.
Awesomely cool, huh?
The rotor switch also controls a compensator
that adjusts power output proportionate
to target distance, we don't any more butt burns.
- No, I got a credit card branded right here.
- Gee Gramps, whenever you go to the checkout,
you should pop your butt on the scanner.
(laughs)
(bright music)
I caught it.
- Better set the power switch on low.
- [Police] That kid has some kind of weapon.
- What the hell?
- He just shot at us.
- Freeze, drop your weapon immediately.
- [Police] Freeze girly, right now.
All of you, hands behind your head.
- Hey, you got no reason to search these kids.
- You got an ID old man?
- Yeah in my back pocket, you wanna reach back there
and tickle me a little?
- Quit being cute, old timer.
You got ID for these kids?
- Geez, I forgot my library card.
- That mouth is gonna get you in a heap of trouble
and you best not be pointing weapons at police cars.
- For goodness sake, it's not a weapon, it's a toy.
- Girly, do you know how many officers
are killed by so called toy guns every year?
- None.
- This is the female you want searched?
She's just a kid.
- Little kid, big mouth.
- Really?
It's quite evident that diplomacy
is not an element of your training regimen.
- I see what you mean.
Come on, come with me Ms. Smarty pants.
- Mama Mia, look at that, I thought we lost everything.
- Never disobey police officers.
We have lots of data, let's test your credit cards, Poppy.
- Looks okay.
♪ Sitting in my room thinking about ♪
♪ All the crazy things we love to do ♪
♪ Just me and you ♪
♪ Can't but smile and laugh because ♪
- Maddy, system on.
- Good evening, Glory, hope you are well.
System ready.
- [Glory] Thank you, Maddy, I am well.
Access file mood gun.
- [Maddy] File mood gun, ready.
- [Glory] Credit cards heating up and smoking.
Caused by interaction between electromagnetic field
and the ferrite module in card.
Solution, introduce frequency modulation circuitry.
- Research complete, no alternate solution.
- Thank you Maddy, end session.
Lights, turn off.
- [Dad] Pleasant dreams sweetheart, love you.
- Hi baby girl, I love you.
- [Dad] Pleasant dreams sweetheart, love you.
- [Mom] Hi baby girl, I love you.
- [Dad] Pleasant dreams sweetheart, love you.
- So, is this your invention Mr. Vinci?
- Actually, my 12 year old grand daughter invented it.
- [Mr. Dowds] 12 years old?
Very interesting indeed.
This mood gun has commercial potential.
Tell me, what's the other function?
- [Poppy] It's a card reader.
- Card reader. - A credit card reader.
You aim at someone, you pull the trigger,
the signal bounce off of the cards
and sends the data back.
- Remarkable, have you tested it?
- [Poppy] Yeah.
Now, we have a little trouble, but we fix it.
- But it read the cards?
- [Poppy] Accurately.
- All right.
Gentlemen, please excuse me just for one moment.
- [Mosey] Giuseppe, you never told us about the card reader.
- [Poppy] Yeah, my Glory.
My Glory invented that too.
- [Bones] The kid is worth her weight in diamonds.
- Mr. Vinci, we feel strongly that a card reader
would be illegal, however, the mood gun has potential.
- No card reader, huh?
- How much potential?
- Well we would need to do a marketing study,
but devices like this can have huge sales.
Tell you what, if you modify the drawings
to show just the mood gun, not the card reader,
we'll be happy to represent you for a fee of course.
- Mr. Dowds, if you think the mood gun has potential
then you should be happy to take this project.
Molto grazie for your time.
- [Mr. Dowds] Thank you sir.
- Just give me one more month, huh?
I got a great deal going.
- [Tom] The time limit on your payment is a disgrace.
No more excuses.
- Excuses, what excuse?
I don't need no stinking excuse.
- [Tom] We will receive them by the due date
or I'll file an eviction notice.
- My house, your stinking asshole client
stole it from me.
- [Tom] Now do it.
(somber music)
- This is for my family, Mosey.
And you too, Bones.
(screaming)
- [Bones] What are you doing, Pops?
- So, you called?
What do you got?
- I gotta pay you.
I gotta pay rent.
- Grazie.
- I need money.
- You know the program, right.
- Yeah, yeah, I hear all about the big fortune.
I get jail time if I get caught.
I told you, I got kids.
- [Mosey] Would you hear me out?
Or are we just gonna sip espresso and discuss the weather?
- I'm listening.
- All right, Giuseppe.
Here's what I'll do just for you?
Like I said, you deliver the data
and we provide you credit cards in return.
Use the cards at ATMs.
You pay us 10 G's a week until you finish paying off
the 60 G's you owe.
After that, we split the ATM 50 50.
Are you with me so far?
- Yeah.
- Good, now, you tap an ATM,
you do not return to that machine for a month.
Hit as many as you want, but one card per transaction,
and one card per ATM, one.
And wear a good disguise, not some Halloween crap.
They got you on camera.
And please, don't do drag.
Questions.
- Well yeah, two.
First, I'm gonna look crazy I go around
shooting people with a ray gun.
- Yeah, you're right.
An old man wondering around pointing a ray gun
would not look copacetic.
The kids need to be part of this.
- That's crazy.
You think I'm gonna let my kids go around
shooting people with a ray gun?
So I can steal money?
- They will if they don't wanna see Grampie in a wheelchair.
- What else?
- I'm gonna need a vehicle to get around to the ATM's.
- [Bones] Yeah, we'll send over a limo.
How about a freaking hearse?
- [Mosey] Buy yourself a clunker and add it to the vig.
But the kids, need to help you collect data.
- Here's 20 accounts.
- [Mosey] So Pops, what's the magic word, huh?
- Abracadabra.
(laughing)
Glory home?
Oh hey, Glory, sweetie, come in here a minute, huh?
- What's wrong?
- The lawyer called again today.
They gonna issue an eviction notice in one week.
No, but I get lucky.
I met two business men at the patent attorney.
- Business men?
- They're very interested in the ray gun, yeah.
They say if we collect lots of credit card data
and pass the information to them,
they gonna make credit cards and we can use them
to go get cash from the ATM's.
And they even give me a cash advance to buy a vehicle
so we can go visit the ATM's.
- That's a serious crime, Poppy.
- You're right.
But, I gotta keep us off the street.
If we don't go along with this plan,
we gonna have to find a vacant park bench.
- And if we do go along with this plan,
one day that park bench will seem like a five star resort.
- Bambini, I can't live without my family.
- If you go to jail, we won't have a family.
- Give it back.
Give it back.
- [Mosey] Let me be clear, signori Vinci,
we sealed our deal when you took the advance.
- [Poppy] But I just give it back.
- That deal involves illegal activities
which renders it null and--
- Excuse me, have you ever heard the expression
honor among thieves, huh?
- I thought you were business men?
- Hey, Giuseppe, put a muzzle on this one.
- Accrediting honor in thievery seems like a ploy
to justify illegal activities.
- Children should be seen not--
- Anyway, it's irrelevant.
I will not allow my invention to be used
for illegal purposes.
I will destroy the drives and the ray gun, so there.
- So there?
So.
So there?
Let's see if this will change your mind.
- No, stop, let go of him!
Stop, no, get off of him.
Stop!
Let go!
Leave him alone!
- Stop.
- Put it down, kid.
Put it down.
- Get
out of our house.
- Oh, what's this?
- Get out of our house
Get out or I'll shoot.
- Truthie, no, put it down, put it down.
- These are bad guys, Poppy.
I said get out.
Both of you.
- Don't, don't do it.
- Oh!
- You better stop kid, or I squeeze til your eyeballs pop.
Wow, four misfires, must be my lucky day.
- [Glory] Yes, Mr. Bones, very lucky for you
I disabled the firing mechanism.
You should thank me for saving you.
- Very clever, Glory.
How about this one?
(intense music)
Quite impressive, Glory.
And Truth, very brave to defend your Grandpa like that.
But, I think we got a communications issue here.
So children, listen to me carefully.
Your Poppy owes us 60 thousand dollars
he lost making bets.
And he also tells us that he's three months
behind in the rent and you're gonna be homeless.
So, if you find it immoral, illegal, or repulsive
to collect credit card data,
and then to get cash from ATM's using fake credit cards,
and this causes Poppy to skip out on his payments,
we'll need to employ
extremely unpleasant options.
Care to know what that entails?
Anyone?
Well then, I'll elaborate.
First, we pour concrete around Poppy's feet
and take him for a dip in the lake.
Next, there's a certain madam in town,
specializes in procuring young boys and girls,
especially young virgins for a mid east slavery.
You've heard of child trafficking haven't you, Glory?
Is that frightening, Glory?
You are a virgin, are you not?
Glory.
- Why did you gamble, Gramps?
- I don't know.
I don't know, I,
with Glory gonna graduate, you gonna be in high school,
I see this big empty space in my life.
So, I make some small bets and I win
and then I make some bigger bets and I win,
and I didn't think I was ever gonna lose.
- But then you did, so why didn't you tell us?
- I was ashamed.
I risked everything.
I put us all in danger.
I'm so sorry.
- Yes.
(rock music)
- Hey, no fair sneaking up from behind.
Wow, cool gun.
Can I try?
Let's look for aliens, you go that way.
- Where's my ray gun?
- I was playing with another kid and we swapped.
- Doofus.
There, it's moving towards the exit.
Poppy, meet us in the parking lot.
Truth and I need to catch them
before they get to their car.
- [Truth] Hey, hey, that's my ray gun.
- It's mine, we traded.
- Are you some kind of junior con man?
You traded fair and square.
- [Glory] It wasn't his to trade, it's mine.
So give it back.
- Oh no you don't.
You went and traded, so be on your way.
- Hey, enough, don't pushing my kids like that.
- Here's his toy mister, now give mine back.
- Your little brat brother traded
and now you want it back?
He needs a lesson.
- See, no trade, now give it back.
- Son.
Go get in the car.
(rock music)
- You give that back or else.
- Smoke her.
- Too close, tutti, no more swapping guns, okay?
- We have 52 uncorrupted files.
- [Poppy] A full deck, that ought to make Mosey happy.
(upbeat dance music)
- Run.
I almost peed my pants.
- Oops.
- Hospitality.
- Can I pour for you Signor Mosentano?
- And molti grazzi Signorina Vinci.
- Signor Bonaiotto?
- And some for Gramps.
Can't leave him out of the celebration, Ms. Vinci.
- No need to worry, Mosey, we're all out of arsenic.
- Arsenic, make mine a double.
Here's to a profitable relationship.
- Salut. - Salut.
- [Mosey] So, what's the occasion?
- I have a payment for you.
- Really?
For what?
- For the gambling bet he lost.
- Oh look, a lovely teddy bear.
Bones, take a look at that.
- Oh yeah, boss, real cute.
Solid too.
- Stop!
- Gee Boss.
I always wanted to whack a teddy bear.
- Now, who was the little genius rigged this, huh?
- Naughty girlie.
I ought to spank you til you can't sit for a week.
- If you hurt me, you'll regret it Mr. Bonaiotto.
Now let me go.
- Now, where were we?
Ah yes, Giuseppe, I believe you have something
that belongs to us.
Seven thousand, where's the rest?
- Mosey, I gotta pay the back rent or they gonna evict us.
- Where is it?
- Glory, Truth, please stand.
I said stand up.
- [Madam] Mosey.
- [Mosey] Hello Madam, I just wanted to show you
the young girl genius we spoke about.
- [Madam] Oh yes.
- [Mosey] Yeah, her and her brother are here with me now.
- [Madam] A choice candidate, top dollar.
The boy also.
- You bastard.
- [Mosey] Where's it at Pops or the bambini are next.
- Here, take your lousy money.
Just leave my kids out of this.
- Make your payments on time, Giuseppe
and don't lecture me about the kids.
You brought them into this.
Anything else?
See you next week.
Grandfather.
(whistling)
- I'm shocked that Blater's rushing to evict you
since you've paid so promptly in the past.
- We're gonna be homeless.
- Look, if you can pay even a small amount,
it'll show your intent to honor the rental contract.
- [Poppy] I told him, a month I can pay it all.
- Good, I'll prepare a notification of intent
and I'll come by tomorrow.
How are Glory and Truth?
I'm sorry I haven't been by I've just been so busy.
- The good news is that Glory
got an offer to join the graduate research program
at Stanford.
- [Cassie] Oh that's fantastic news Poppy.
I can't wait to see them again.
- Glory!
- Poppy, what's wrong?
- Can't breathe, I can't breathe.
- Call 911.
- [911 Operator] 911 Emergency operator here.
Can you describe the problem.
- My Grandfather's having a heart attack.
We're about to administer CPR.
Please send an ambulance.
- [911 Operator] Is an adult on the premises?
- It's just us adolescents.
- [911 Operator] Okay, so roll the--
- I know CPR, call the damn paramedics.
I'm applying rapid compression
He stopped breathing, he just stopped breathing,
help me, Truth.
Hurry, put your hands on mine.
When I press down, you do too.
- [911 Operator] Check his pulse.
- Oh my God, it's stopped.
- [911 Operator] Don't stop, keep doing the CPR.
- Don't you dare die.
Don't even think about it.
(gasping)
- [Glory] He's breathing.
He's breathing.
We got a pulse.
- Are you the Vinci kids?
First, you did great with the CPR.
Grandpa is doing well, but he needs a coronary bypass.
The good news is, we already have him scheduled
for tomorrow morning.
- Can he die?
- It's a serious surgery son, there's always a risk.
- Can we see him?
- Sure, hold on a minute.
He said the kids are in some kind of danger
and he's the guardian.
- Should we call child protective services?
- [Cardiologist] That's a good idea.
Hey kids, Grandpa's still under sedation,
but you can sit in the room with him, follow me.
(techno music)
(phone ringing)
- Don't answer that.
We need to leave now.
- Can you drive?
- How hard can it be?
- Are you allowed?
- Until I get caught.
- You the Vinci kids?
- Correct.
(smooth rock music)
- Children, do you understand that this is
for your own care and protection?
- We're quite capable of caring for ourselves Mrs. Armstrong
- Sorry dear, you both are underage
with no adult guardian.
So we're placing you with foster parents
until your Grandfather is well.
You should be grateful we have a nice home to care for you.
At that, they've just arrived.
- Well, well, well, what do we have here?
- Oh this is definitely kharma.
- [Mrs. Armstrong] Kids, meet your foster parents,
Mr. And Mrs. Benedict.
- Mrs. Armstrong we had an incident with these
people last week at the mall
and they accused us of cheating their son then--
- [Mr. Benedict] No, no, no, no, no,
see that's all been resolved.
And I am sure that Bobby will be very excited
to see you again.
- Yes, and he will have some new playmates.
It's bed time children, but before light's out,
let's have a little talk.
Agent Armstrong said that you attend college, Glory,
is that correct?
Don't you feel out of place?
It seems unfair to have a mere child
competing with college age students.
- It isn't a competition, Mrs. Benedict.
- You got quite the arrogant attitude there young lady,
if you ask me.
- Well Mr. Benedict, you weren't asked.
- My, what a snotty little twerp.
You just earned your first day in solitary.
- But I have a class project due tomorrow
and if I don't submit it I'll fail the course and--
- [Mr. Benedict] Well seeing as you're so much smarter
than everybody else, I don't see how much
that one day is gonna effect you.
- And what is this project?
- [Glory] The mood gun Bobby took from Truth.
- Are you serious?
A toy gun?
- [Bobby] I heard talk about the ray gun.
- It's a mood gun, but I have plan to develop it
into a medical diagnostic instrument.
- Seriously?
You're gonna make a medical diagnostic instrument
out of that piece of crap?
What are you on drugs?
- My sister isn't on drugs
and she's the smartest girl in the world.
- Shut up, boy.
If I want you to talk, I'll let you know.
- Actually, this medical thingy sounds interesting.
- Yeah, Bobby, your new space gun
can tell if people got zits or something.
- [Truth] It isn't his space gun.
- [Mr. Benedict] I said shut up.
Now go stand in the corner
or I'll take my belt to your hide.
I said now, boy.
- [Mrs. Benedict] Well since it's so important,
I'll take you to your house tomorrow before class
so you can pick up your project.
We'll postpone your stay in solitary.
- But I want it.
- [Mr. Benedict] Now, now, now, Bobby,
I am sure once she shows it to the class
Glory will be happy to let you play with it.
Ain't that right, Glory?
- [Mrs. Benedict] You should get a good night's rest.
Tomorrow will be a big day for you
and you've got lots of chores.
(suspenseful music)
- What do you want?
- How do you like your room?
- Cool room, it'd be nice if we had some video games.
- Or my cell phone so I can call the hospital
and check up on our Grandpa.
- My parents don't let me play video games.
They say they're too violent.
- [Glory] Bobby, I'm so worried about
my Grandpa in the hospital.
I really need to find out about him.
Can you get me my cell phone?
- [Bobby] My parents will kill me.
- Oh please, please, Bobby, he's so sick.
- Well, okay.
But swear you'll let me play with the ray gun
whenever I want.
- I promise.
- Hurry up and make the call and give it back.
- [Truth] Awesome sis.
(uplifting music)
- Van, start engine.
(tires screeching)
- Wow, that was awesome sis.
Can you teach me to drive.
- Sure, good idea, that could be useful.
(bright music)
Truth wake up.
Up and at em bro, we got lots to do today.
- I'm starving.
- I have lots to do today, so get moving.
- I can't get moving on an empty stomach.
It's been proven that other kids can't even--
- Here.
- I need food sis, food, food.
Food.
- We need to leave here.
Leave, depart, exit.
Now go do your morning thing.
Van, start engine.
Locate the nearest ATM machine.
No, don't turn around, don't turn around.
- Why are we going to an ATM?
We shouldn't sis.
We could go to jail.
- Van, stop engine.
Truth, this may be our last chance
and I am so done with us being victims, so listen up.
- Wow sis, who twisted your panties?
- Seriously?
Poppy had a heart attack and he's having heart surgery.
He owes the mobsters 60 grand,
and if he can't pay they'll pour him a pair of cement boots
and drop him in a lake.
- I'm so sorry I didn't shoot them.
I wish you didn't fix Poppy's gun.
- We're lucky I disabled it or we'd all be in jail.
Blater is going to possess our home
and boot us into the streets,
where we'd be fortunate to inhabit
a large cardboard box, but CPS wants to protects us,
so they'll send us to the psycho foster parents from hell.
And the greedy monsters will surely find us anyway
and they'll sell us to the malevolent Madame
who will deliver us to traffickers
is the primitive mid east.
So, yeah, I am so done with us being victims.
Besides doofus, you're hungry, we need gas,
and we have Poppy's credit cards.
- I knew that.
- And after the ATM, we have another stop.
GPS locate the spy shop.
(upbeat music)
Truth, go to the kitchen and start talking, over.
- [Truth] Are we having broccoli for dinner again?
- Okay, one more, go to the dining room, over.
- [Truth] I shot the Mosey,
but I swear it was in self defense.
- Awesomely cool, let's see you find this one Mosey.
Okay bro, we're good, over and out.
Testing, one, two, perfetto.
I'm inquiring about patient Mr. Giuseppe Vinci.
He had surgery today.
- Van, start engine.
- Oh crud.
Van, stop engine.
- Aunt Cassie.
I didn't know it was you.
- Hi Auntie.
- Hi kids, great to see you.
Is Poppy home?
- Sorry auntie, he had bypass surgery this morning
and he's in recovery.
- Oh my God, he just called me the other day
to help fight the eviction.
I'm so sorry.
Can he have visitors?
- Maybe, but we can't go because the hospital staff
ratted us to CPS.
They think we need foster care until he's well.
Last night we escaped the foster parents from hell.
- Yeah, baby, we're like desperadoes.
- That's outrageous.
Well, I can help with the CPS thing.
I also have some documents for Grandpa
to sign on the eviction so
if you can come with me to the hospital--
- So we don't have to stay with our psycho foster family?
- Well, I'm your aunt so I'm pretty sure
I can qualify as your legal guardian.
- Yes! - Yes!
- Come on.
I'll bet it was Blater caused this with his eviction grant.
- Oh my God, there's so much more.
Poppy, Poppy, they said you're going to fully recover.
- I'm gonna be okay.
- [Truth] They hooked you with all those tubes and wires.
- [Glory] Poppy, Cassie brought us here.
She's going to help us with the eviction, remember?
- Hi, Giuseppe.
- Thank you for helping with this Cassie.
- I'm glad to hear you're going to be well again.
- I got two guardian angels.
- Do you wanna talk about the house?
- I'm okay.
I just,
Just I, I got no money, Cassie.
- Poppy, we got this from an AtM.
- Oh mama mia, no, you're not supposed to do that.
- I told you.
- It's legal Grandpa, I used your credit cards.
- He's too excited folks.
Mr. Vinci, are you okay?
- I don't feel nothing, is that okay?
- If you don't feel any pain, you're okay.
- Giuseppe,
I'll gladly lend you the back rent.
That should hold Blater off until you recover.
- Grazie mia, Cassie,
I promise I gonna pay you back.
Even if I have to sell my soul.
- You already did that Gramps.
- You just focus on getting better
and let me worry about the kids.
I'll pay Tom and have him quash the eviction
or we'll file a suit asserting that
the stress that he created has caused you
personal injury and suffering.
- I should have called you sooner.
- Strike two people.
This man just had open heart surgery.
It's not like we removed a wart.
- Maybe we should go.
- Thank you, nurse, we won't upset him again.
Poppy, remember when we discussed
having a legal guardian for the children, just in case.
- Yeah, a long time ago.
- The chickens have come home.
- Lousy chickens.
- They want us protected and---
- They need a legal guardian now
and I would love to do that.
- You gonna do that too?
- [Cassie] I promise to take really good care of the kids.
I guess that's our exit cue.
Kids, why don't you meet me at the car,
I need to talk to Poppy for a minute.
This says that the children are my responsibility
until you are released.
- Thank you for all this.
- One more thing.
The kids told me about Bones and Mosey.
I can help with that as well.
- Now I have three angeli.
- I'll see you tomorrow, Poppy.
Okay, get better.
(screaming) (rock music)
- [Mrs Armstrong] Excuse me, are you attempting suicide?
Please move.
- [Cassie] You're abducting my children, let them go.
- Ma'am, you appear to be mentally unstable.
These are not your kids, now move it.
- [Cassie] I'm not budging 'til you let them go.
- [Woman] Off the hood and step out of the way ma'am,
this is official CPS business.
- It's not until you release my children.
- [Mrs. Armstrong] Your children?
I'm with CPS, they're Granddad is incapacitated
and reported they're in danger
so this is an official matter of CPS.
Officer, this woman is irrational
and she's endangering these children.
- I am their aunt and their attorney
and now I'm their legal guardian so back off.
- I don't care about your paper, I've got paper too.
- That changed, Mr. Vinci just gave me custody.
- They are in danger, Ms. Salvatori.
They need protection, so it's an official matter for CPS.
- They are now responsibility
and if they are in danger then I will
contact the police directly.
Officer, please remove this handcuff
or I will file a false arrest complaint.
- Officer, this woman is obstructing me
in the performance of my duty.
(applause)
- Thank you officer.
Now, if you don't mind.
(phone ringing)
- Hello Professor Goldstein.
- [Professor Goldstein] Hello Glory.
We missed you in class today.
Are you all right?
- [Glory] Sorry I couldn't be there.
Poppy had bypass surgery today.
- [Professor Goldstein] Oh, so sorry, did it go well?
- He'll be fine, he just needs time to recuperate.
Am I in trouble again?
- [Professor Goldstein] No of course not.
I have information about the grad school offer,
but maybe I should hold off.
- No, no, please, I'd love to hear about it now.
Can you come for dinner?
- There's definitely a disconnect
between your abilities and the way people relate to you.
- It's the story of my life, auntie.
People can't seem to reconcile my age
with my mental ability.
- That'll get better as you get older.
But in the mean time, we women must be strong and assertive.
We must fight for our rights and convictions
or else we'll wind up barefoot and pregnant
and chained to the proverbial kitchen stove.
Onions?
- You called me a woman.
- Oh Glory, you are a woman.
So much more than many others.
Professor Goldstein, you remember my brother, Truth.
And this is Cassie Salvatori,
our aunt, lawyers, and guardian.
- Pleased to meet you, Cassie.
- Likewise Bernie.
- So you mentioned the grad school offer?
- Cassie, what do you think?
- Well she's underaged so no dorm.
- Living off campus she'll need to be with an adult.
Glory, what if Poppy and Truth were to move there too?
- It's up to Poppy, but I think he'd love that.
- What about you, Truth?
- Well as long as Mosey and Bones don't find us.
- We need to put those vermin behind bars.
- Any ideas?
- I tried to secretly record their threats,
but Maddy got busted, literally.
So I totally bugged the house.
- I'm doubtful they'll wanna meet here again.
- Well see, Stanford could do more for them.
- It was good to meet you Bernie.
- Same here, Cassie.
- Call me.
- Stop it, that was nasty.
That was disgusting.
- Uh oh.
- Buena sera, very pleaded to meet you Ms. Salvatori.
- Delighted, Cassie.
- Good evening, pleased to meet you Mr. Mosentano,
Mr. Bonaiotto.
Two what do we owe this surprise visit gentlemen?
- Just checking to see the kids are okay.
We heard Grandpa is in the hospital.
- And we brought them something.
- Hey kids, you okay?
- Just peachy thank you.
- Can we talk.
- We were just leaving, so maybe tomorrow.
- We'll just be a minute.
We were shocked Poppy had a heart attack.
- Yeah, sure I'll bet.
Oops, bad choice of words.
- Can I get you something to drink?
- Coffee?
- I'm good.
- No thanks.
- So you brought us something?
- First a security check.
Cell phones, on the table ladies.
Turned off.
Glory, where's your brother?
He needs to hear this too.
- Truth, come here.
- Kid, you got a cell phone?
- No, but I want one.
- So.
Poppy's health is a problem,
but he still owes us 50 grand.
So we expect the payments to continue, capiche.
- Wait, you're expecting these children
to break the law--
- That's exactly what I'm saying, Cassie.
And now that these little demons have made you part of this
and ratted us out on all the details,
you're gonna take Poppy's place in helping them collect,
and you're all gonna pay of the debt or else.
I just gave you a stack of new credit cards.
So, next week we expect a payment of 10 grand
plus the vig and 50 files of new card data.
- And if I don't agree?
- If the cement shoes fit.
- Not my style of footwear, Mr. Bonaiotto.
And are you gonna try to sell us all
to your slave trader Mr. Mosentano?
- Fortunately for you Ms. Salvatori,
there's no demand for cougars.
But we still got that deal
with the Madame we don't get paid.
Are you clear on what you gotta do?
- Very clear, Mr. Mosentano.
- You got no idea what we could do to you, sweetheart.
- Did you get any of that, Glory?
- I'm checking.
Yeah, got it all, on the record.
Woohoo!
- Yes!
Got you Mosey and Bones, got you good.
Good job, Glory.
- [Truth] I wish we could send them to jail right now.
- Auntie, I have an idea.
Let's keep following them.
Truth, give me the mood gun.
Surprise!
(upbeat music)
(tires screeching)
- This a family recipe, Cass?
- My mom's, Sicilian style.
- It's the best lasagna I ever had.
- [Professor Goldstein] Well before everybody get
to groggy from eating this delicious Italian food,
I have an announcement.
This concerns a young lady I was privileged
to have in my class at Phoenix college.
I was notified yesterday that
Stanford University, the top medical research college
in the U.S. is offering Ms. Glory D. Vinci
a full graduate scholarship.
They're highly interested in your portable,
non invasive, medical diagnostic instruments,
and they'll move your entire home lab.
It gets better.
They're going to relocate the entire Vinci family
and provide them appropriate quarters near campus.
And they're offering Poppy a job as a lab assistant,
with benefits and Truth gets to attend
the private school with complete dependence.
I heard they have an excellent baseball team.
- I think I'm in Heaven.
Did I die?