1 00:00:00,960 --> 00:00:03,925 HULU PRESENTS 2 00:00:06,889 --> 00:00:09,978 I sometimes forget that you actually live here, bro. 3 00:00:09,978 --> 00:00:12,817 ‐ This bed, man. No wonder your posture's all fucked up. 4 00:00:12,817 --> 00:00:14,320 Explains your behavior, actually. 5 00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:16,742 ‐ Dude, my posture's fine. It's not a problem. 6 00:00:16,742 --> 00:00:19,163 MO: No, man, all seriousness, we're really proud of you, bro. 7 00:00:19,163 --> 00:00:21,376 Goin' back to Egypt, the motherland. 8 00:00:21,376 --> 00:00:23,631 ‐ Dude, I know. I haven't been there for, like, 15 years. 9 00:00:23,631 --> 00:00:25,050 AHMED: Just don't eat the street food, though. 10 00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:28,808 You can get a monster parasite. And don't pet any dogs. Or any animals. 11 00:00:28,808 --> 00:00:30,937 They're probably harboring some kind of anger or rage, 12 00:00:30,937 --> 00:00:32,857 bite you, and then you end up dying. Don't do that. 13 00:00:32,857 --> 00:00:34,903 ‐ No, dude, I'm not gonna eat any of the street food. 14 00:00:34,903 --> 00:00:38,243 I'm only gonna eat, like, authentic shit. 15 00:00:38,243 --> 00:00:40,748 Home‐cooked meals, I'm gonna go visit the mosques‐‐ 16 00:00:40,748 --> 00:00:43,295 I wanna be somewhere where I'm surrounded by Muslims. 17 00:00:43,295 --> 00:00:45,883 You know? It's like none of this confusion that we have here. 18 00:00:45,883 --> 00:00:48,639 Like, it's gonna be... it's gonna be amazing, man. 19 00:00:48,639 --> 00:00:50,475 ‐ That's beautiful, bro. 20 00:00:50,475 --> 00:00:52,856 Look, man, I need you to sell these three iPads for me. 21 00:00:52,856 --> 00:00:55,653 ‐ What? ‐ Look, the taxes in Egypt on electronics 22 00:00:55,653 --> 00:00:57,824 are through the roof. We mark these down a little bit, 23 00:00:57,824 --> 00:01:00,663 make a lot of money, and put my kid through another year of preschool. 24 00:01:00,663 --> 00:01:02,333 ‐ No, I'm not doing that. 25 00:01:02,333 --> 00:01:04,253 ‐ Come on, just put 'em in one of your bags. 26 00:01:04,253 --> 00:01:07,677 ‐ Dude, I have one bag, and I'm not gonna fill it with iPads. 27 00:01:07,677 --> 00:01:10,182 I don't even have room. See? I can barely even get my shoes in. 28 00:01:10,182 --> 00:01:12,269 ‐ [ laughing ] What do you mean you're taking just one bag? 29 00:01:12,269 --> 00:01:14,941 What, are you backpacking in Europe? You goin' on a canoe trip? 30 00:01:14,941 --> 00:01:17,822 You gotta bring stuff. You can't show up empty‐handed, bro. 31 00:01:17,822 --> 00:01:19,075 AHMED: You gotta bring shit back for me too. 32 00:01:19,075 --> 00:01:21,204 I told my wife you'd get us some pistachios. 33 00:01:21,204 --> 00:01:23,793 ‐ I'm not bringing stuff. I'm not even gonna be in Cairo, okay? 34 00:01:23,793 --> 00:01:25,838 I'm mostly gonna be in the village at my grandpa's. So‐‐ 35 00:01:25,838 --> 00:01:28,176 ‐ Take it easy, okay? ‐ Bro, you always do this, man. 36 00:01:28,176 --> 00:01:30,515 I'm doin' somethin' simple, and you're making it complicated. 37 00:01:30,515 --> 00:01:32,101 ‐ Can you stop being so stubborn about this? 38 00:01:32,101 --> 00:01:35,440 You need a SIM card for your phone. Roaming kills everybody. 39 00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:38,154 All right? You just go to the Vodafone in Cairo, 40 00:01:38,154 --> 00:01:39,741 you speak to my boy Misho. 41 00:01:39,741 --> 00:01:41,620 You give him the three iPads, he gives you cash. 42 00:01:41,620 --> 00:01:43,415 In return, you'll get a SIM card. 43 00:01:43,415 --> 00:01:45,586 I'm doin' you a favor here. 44 00:01:45,586 --> 00:01:47,507 I just can't believe you. 45 00:01:47,507 --> 00:01:49,928 Look. Look how easy this is. Boom. [ whistles ] 46 00:01:49,928 --> 00:01:51,515 This guy's constantly bitchin'. 47 00:01:55,105 --> 00:01:56,608 ‐ What is this? 48 00:01:56,608 --> 00:01:59,531 ‐ I thought you were flyin' by yourself, bro. The family's comin'? 49 00:01:59,531 --> 00:02:02,202 ‐ No, they're not. Mom, what is all this stuff? 50 00:02:02,202 --> 00:02:04,791 ‐ Habibi, there is only these three bags, okay? 51 00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:07,421 I told everyone in the family that you cannot bring anything. 52 00:02:07,421 --> 00:02:09,885 ‐ Who'd you say no to, exactly? ‐ Everyone. 53 00:02:09,885 --> 00:02:12,181 ‐ Mom, I'm not bringin' all this shit. It's crazy. 54 00:02:12,181 --> 00:02:14,895 ‐ Habibi, your father's family misses you. 55 00:02:15,772 --> 00:02:17,817 ‐ Mom, they're just gonna be happy to see me. 56 00:02:17,817 --> 00:02:19,445 They don't need me to bring all this stuff. 57 00:02:19,445 --> 00:02:21,073 NASEEM: They do need you to. 58 00:02:21,073 --> 00:02:22,911 It's how you show your love, habibi. 59 00:02:22,911 --> 00:02:25,457 ‐ Re‐‐ Bengay is how I show my love? 60 00:02:25,457 --> 00:02:27,211 ‐ Ah. Extra Strength. 61 00:02:27,211 --> 00:02:28,338 AHMED: I use it all the time 62 00:02:28,338 --> 00:02:30,593 and I don't even need it sometimes‐‐ helps me go to sleep. 63 00:02:30,593 --> 00:02:32,806 ‐ What? FAROUK: If you're gonna run away, 64 00:02:32,806 --> 00:02:34,726 take something with you for your family. 65 00:02:34,726 --> 00:02:36,688 MO: That's what I'm trying to tell him, khalo. 66 00:02:36,688 --> 00:02:39,401 ‐ When are you gonna travel and explore the world? 67 00:02:39,401 --> 00:02:41,280 ‐ I still haven't explored this town. 68 00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:42,742 Can't fucking go anywhere. 69 00:02:43,828 --> 00:02:47,459 ‐ Habibi, everything is labeled with everyone's name, okay? 70 00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:49,798 Make sure you get the right thing to everyone. 71 00:02:49,798 --> 00:02:50,925 MO: I didn't know you were takin' 72 00:02:50,925 --> 00:02:53,263 three or four bags, I coulda fit my GoPros in there, 73 00:02:53,263 --> 00:02:54,683 we coulda flipped 'em really easily. 74 00:02:54,683 --> 00:02:56,603 Khalto, can we squeeze 'em in there maybe? 75 00:02:56,603 --> 00:02:57,939 AHMED: No, no, no. We don't have time, man. 76 00:02:57,939 --> 00:02:59,275 You gotta be there three hours early. 77 00:02:59,275 --> 00:03:03,116 ‐ You got it, khalo? All right, cool. I'll get the other bags. 78 00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,161 NASEEM: Don't get up, Farouk. 79 00:03:15,432 --> 00:03:16,852 [ thud ] 80 00:03:19,816 --> 00:03:21,360 [ chatter ] 81 00:03:43,488 --> 00:03:45,158 I'm‐‐I'm over there. 82 00:03:52,005 --> 00:03:54,009 [ baby crying ] 83 00:04:20,395 --> 00:04:21,857 [ theme music playing ] 84 00:04:26,407 --> 00:04:28,202 [ on switch clicks ] 85 00:04:28,202 --> 00:04:34,089 [ Farouk on tape, speaking Arabic ] 86 00:05:28,532 --> 00:05:29,742 [ off switch clicks ] 87 00:05:34,878 --> 00:05:37,340 [ Arabic chatter ] 88 00:05:37,340 --> 00:05:39,011 [ cabbies clamoring ] 89 00:05:39,011 --> 00:05:40,096 MAN: Taxi? 90 00:05:40,096 --> 00:05:42,017 ‐ Uh, taxi? ‐ Hey, hey. Hey, Captain. 91 00:05:42,017 --> 00:05:44,522 Come with me. I give you a good rate. 92 00:05:44,522 --> 00:05:47,152 ‐ La shukraan. ‐ Listen to me. 93 00:05:47,152 --> 00:05:50,993 I take care of you, we go wherever together, you and me. 94 00:05:50,993 --> 00:05:52,955 ‐ La shukraan. ‐ No, no, no! 95 00:05:52,955 --> 00:05:54,374 You will come with me? 96 00:05:54,374 --> 00:05:55,961 ‐ Shukraan. ‐ No, no, no! 97 00:05:55,961 --> 00:05:57,632 ‐ I love you. ‐ I love you more. 98 00:05:57,632 --> 00:05:59,677 ‐ Hey, I‐‐ ‐ No, I love you more! 99 00:05:59,677 --> 00:06:01,138 [ in Arabic ] 100 00:06:03,894 --> 00:06:07,025 It's my motherfuckin' cousin. What up, my nigga! 101 00:06:07,025 --> 00:06:08,361 C'mere! 102 00:06:10,658 --> 00:06:11,701 ‐ [ in Arabic ] 103 00:06:11,701 --> 00:06:13,246 ‐ I can't believe I'm seeing you right now. 104 00:06:13,246 --> 00:06:14,624 My mind is just blown. 105 00:06:16,878 --> 00:06:19,132 Bro, you don't have to speak to me in Arabic. My English is premium. 106 00:06:19,132 --> 00:06:21,972 I went to AUC. American University in Cairo, baby! 107 00:06:21,972 --> 00:06:23,684 ‐ Oh. Yeah, no, of course. Yeah. 108 00:06:23,684 --> 00:06:26,355 ‐ Anyway, cuz, you got style. Look at you. Snapback. 109 00:06:26,355 --> 00:06:28,694 Hey, are those the OG editions? 110 00:06:28,694 --> 00:06:29,779 ‐ Yeah, they are. 111 00:06:29,779 --> 00:06:32,535 ‐ You pimp, man. You pimp. ‐ Thanks, man. 112 00:06:32,535 --> 00:06:34,664 ‐ And the whole family is just so excited to see you. 113 00:06:34,664 --> 00:06:36,584 I can't tell you. ‐ Man, I can't wait to see them. 114 00:06:36,584 --> 00:06:38,129 It's‐‐It's so amazing to be here. ‐ [ phone chiming ] 115 00:06:38,129 --> 00:06:39,924 ‐ That's her right now. This is Mama. 116 00:06:39,924 --> 00:06:41,970 Hello. Hi, Mom. 117 00:06:42,513 --> 00:06:44,767 [ in Arabic ] 118 00:06:48,734 --> 00:06:50,946 Okay. Bye, bye, bye. Bye. 119 00:06:50,946 --> 00:06:53,451 ‐ Hey, my Arabic's a little bit rusty, 120 00:06:53,451 --> 00:06:55,789 but what does "Kutcher" mean again? 121 00:06:55,789 --> 00:06:58,294 ‐ Like, Ashton, bro. Ashton Kutcher. 122 00:06:58,294 --> 00:07:00,339 You know, you were standing out there with the cabbies, 123 00:07:00,339 --> 00:07:02,678 you were like, "Dude, where's my car?" [ laughs ] 124 00:07:02,678 --> 00:07:04,222 Classic film though, right? 125 00:07:04,222 --> 00:07:05,851 ‐ Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. 126 00:07:05,851 --> 00:07:06,936 ‐ Yeah. ‐ It's been a while. 127 00:07:06,936 --> 00:07:09,609 ‐ Yeah, it's been a bit, but you've seen Two and a Half Men though, right? 128 00:07:09,609 --> 00:07:11,738 ‐ Uh... ‐ Dude, that shit got dope 129 00:07:11,738 --> 00:07:13,658 ever since they got rid of Charlie Sheen. 130 00:07:13,658 --> 00:07:16,664 Man, Ashton Kutcher just killed it! The transition was seamless! 131 00:07:16,664 --> 00:07:19,712 He's such a professional. ‐ Seems like they handled it really well. 132 00:07:19,712 --> 00:07:20,798 ‐ Yeah, yeah, yeah. ‐ True. 133 00:07:20,798 --> 00:07:22,383 ‐ All right. Let's do this. 134 00:07:23,427 --> 00:07:25,223 You only brought four bags? 135 00:07:25,223 --> 00:07:28,270 Travelin' light, pimp. I love it! ‐ Uh, thanks. 136 00:07:28,270 --> 00:07:29,649 ‐ Aw, man, 137 00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:31,861 I know the family was pressing you to get stuff, 138 00:07:31,861 --> 00:07:33,197 and that's why I didn't ask for anything. 139 00:07:33,197 --> 00:07:34,199 ‐ Thank you. 140 00:07:34,826 --> 00:07:37,540 ‐ Plus, one of my boys flies for Egyptian Air, 141 00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:39,417 and he hooks me up on the DL all the time. 142 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,046 ‐ Oh, dude. That's awesome. ‐ Yeah, man. 143 00:07:41,046 --> 00:07:44,261 Just last month he got me some, like, premium kush. 144 00:07:44,261 --> 00:07:46,181 Straight‐up narco shit. 145 00:07:46,181 --> 00:07:49,271 You know what? We're gonna roll that up and smoke it when we get home, inshallah. 146 00:07:49,271 --> 00:07:51,901 It's gonna be good. Dude, I'm gonna show you everything. 147 00:07:51,901 --> 00:07:54,030 I'm gonna give you the best tour of Egypt. You're gonna love it. 148 00:07:54,030 --> 00:07:55,784 ‐ Oh, man, dude, I can't wait, man. 149 00:07:55,784 --> 00:07:58,748 Just to hang out with the family and see all the sights, 150 00:07:58,748 --> 00:08:00,001 like, visit all the cool mosques. 151 00:08:00,711 --> 00:08:02,130 ‐ Wow, man, you don't even need the kush. 152 00:08:02,130 --> 00:08:03,550 You straight‐up cray‐cray. Let's go. 153 00:08:03,550 --> 00:08:04,677 ‐ Yeah. 154 00:08:08,977 --> 00:08:10,856 [ engine starts ] 155 00:08:15,699 --> 00:08:17,661 ‐ [ Arabic pop on radio ] RAMY: Are we close to downtown? 156 00:08:17,661 --> 00:08:20,499 Like, by Tahrir, where the revolution happened and stuff? 157 00:08:20,499 --> 00:08:21,961 ‐ No, no, we're not close. 158 00:08:23,130 --> 00:08:24,382 ‐ Wow, man. 159 00:08:24,382 --> 00:08:26,930 Can't wait to go to the village to see Grandpa. 160 00:08:26,930 --> 00:08:28,683 ‐ Village sucks, bro, 161 00:08:28,683 --> 00:08:30,353 and it's really fuckin' far. 162 00:08:30,353 --> 00:08:33,442 You drive all the way there, and Grandpa, I mean‐‐ 163 00:08:33,442 --> 00:08:35,446 Gedo is cool for, like, five minutes, man. 164 00:08:35,446 --> 00:08:37,283 You're way too pimp to hang out at the village, bro. 165 00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:39,830 Just follow my lead. I swear, I'll show you the best time. 166 00:08:39,830 --> 00:08:42,293 I'll show you the real Cairo, bro. 167 00:08:42,293 --> 00:08:43,462 ‐ Okay. 168 00:08:46,678 --> 00:08:49,600 ‐ Hey, you hungry? You wanna go grab a bite at Chili's or something? 169 00:08:50,727 --> 00:08:52,355 ‐ Chili's, like, the restaurant? 170 00:08:52,355 --> 00:08:55,069 ‐ Yeah, dude. I mean, you were on that flight for ages, 171 00:08:55,069 --> 00:08:57,115 and they only serve, like, hummus and shit. 172 00:08:57,115 --> 00:08:58,952 Let's get you some boneless B‐wings! 173 00:08:59,662 --> 00:09:02,918 ‐ Um...no, no, I'm‐‐ I'm good, man. 174 00:09:02,918 --> 00:09:06,258 I‐I figured we could have, like, some Egyptian food, ya know? 175 00:09:06,258 --> 00:09:08,555 My mom said Tant Ammah is, like, the best cook. 176 00:09:08,555 --> 00:09:11,769 ‐ Hey, whatever you want, homeboy. [ speaks Arabic ] 177 00:09:12,437 --> 00:09:13,940 Check it out. There's the Pyramids. 178 00:09:14,775 --> 00:09:16,320 RAMY [ laughs ]: Wow. 179 00:09:19,409 --> 00:09:23,292 [ music playing ] 180 00:09:29,387 --> 00:09:31,308 [ no audible dialogue ] 181 00:09:35,191 --> 00:09:37,529 [ Arabic pop music playing ] 182 00:10:09,217 --> 00:10:10,762 [ Ramy, in Arabic ] 183 00:10:13,142 --> 00:10:18,945 ‐ Wow! Bengay Extra Strength! Habibi, habibi, habibi. 184 00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:37,231 I just do it! [ laughs ] 185 00:10:45,498 --> 00:10:46,500 ‐ Mm! I just do it! 186 00:10:49,130 --> 00:10:50,550 WOMAN: Girls With Curls! 187 00:11:10,297 --> 00:11:11,299 ‐ Uh, Foreman. 188 00:11:26,329 --> 00:11:29,002 ‐ [ exclaims in Arabic ] 189 00:11:29,002 --> 00:11:30,004 iPad! 190 00:12:02,485 --> 00:12:03,613 MAN: That's good. RAMY: Mmm. 191 00:12:05,282 --> 00:12:06,911 MEN: Eee.... 192 00:12:06,911 --> 00:12:08,038 [ speaking Arabic ] 193 00:12:17,641 --> 00:12:20,187 Look at you, man. Don't worry, it's stuffed pigeon. It's really good. 194 00:12:20,187 --> 00:12:22,400 Just Anthony Bourdain that shit, you'll be fine. 195 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:23,653 RAMY: Hmm. 196 00:13:15,130 --> 00:13:16,842 SHADI: Hey, dude. Save your energy. 197 00:13:16,842 --> 00:13:18,470 Don't bother talking politics with them. 198 00:13:18,470 --> 00:13:20,725 This entire generation suffers from Stockholm Syndrome. 199 00:13:20,725 --> 00:13:21,727 They just love this shit. 200 00:13:41,224 --> 00:13:42,226 [ Ramy laughing ] 201 00:13:51,327 --> 00:13:52,329 Chinese? 202 00:13:52,329 --> 00:13:53,331 UNCLE: Ramy, 203 00:13:53,331 --> 00:13:57,298 why did Obama strike with his drones? 204 00:13:57,298 --> 00:13:58,843 He knew. [ speaks Arabic ] 205 00:13:58,843 --> 00:14:00,930 All American presidents 206 00:14:00,930 --> 00:14:03,310 have to attack the Middle East. 207 00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:07,777 If he doesn't do that, people will think he's Muslim. 208 00:14:07,777 --> 00:14:10,115 [ speaks Arabic ] ‐ So you're saying he killed Muslims 209 00:14:10,115 --> 00:14:11,744 so people wouldn't find out he's Muslim? 210 00:14:11,744 --> 00:14:13,371 Yes, of course! [ speaks Arabic ] 211 00:14:13,371 --> 00:14:15,375 ‐ [ speaks Arabic ] ‐ Ramy, 212 00:14:15,375 --> 00:14:17,254 don't be stubborn like your father. 213 00:14:19,133 --> 00:14:21,722 How's the pigeon, man? Try it. It's real good. 214 00:14:37,378 --> 00:14:40,008 ‐ Tell you what, just finish it real quick and let's go get changed, 215 00:14:40,008 --> 00:14:41,971 'cause I'm gonna take you to a sick party tonight. 216 00:14:41,971 --> 00:14:44,601 ‐ No, I'm all right, man, I think I'm just gonna lay low a little. 217 00:14:44,601 --> 00:14:46,730 I got, like, jet lag and stuff, and... 218 00:14:46,730 --> 00:14:50,070 ‐ One of my bros is, like, the best house DJ in the country. 219 00:14:50,070 --> 00:14:51,615 ‐ You know DJ Tiësto? ‐ Yeah. 220 00:14:51,615 --> 00:14:52,742 ‐ Yeah, he retweeted his shit. 221 00:14:52,742 --> 00:14:54,913 ‐ I'm good, dude. I might just maybe walk around a little bit. 222 00:14:54,913 --> 00:14:57,376 I think there's a mosque near here I wanted to see. Um... 223 00:14:57,376 --> 00:14:59,422 ‐ I have it on my phone. ‐ Mosque? 224 00:15:02,595 --> 00:15:04,181 I mean, if you're gonna be walkin' around town 225 00:15:04,181 --> 00:15:06,854 goin' to mosques and shit, we gotta at least get you a local number. 226 00:15:08,524 --> 00:15:10,402 ‐ Okay, yeah, I think I might know a guy. 227 00:15:10,402 --> 00:15:12,406 Um, I'm supposed to go see him. 228 00:15:12,406 --> 00:15:14,118 ‐ And give‐‐give the party a thought. 229 00:15:14,118 --> 00:15:15,747 What are you gonna do, hang out with these guys? 230 00:15:15,747 --> 00:15:16,749 Look at 'em. 231 00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:19,378 ‐ Yeah. 232 00:15:27,562 --> 00:15:28,814 UNCLE: I tell you, 233 00:15:28,814 --> 00:15:31,277 this iPad is gonna change my life. 234 00:15:32,362 --> 00:15:35,828 Something so precious needs protection. 235 00:15:35,828 --> 00:15:36,914 Oh... 236 00:15:36,914 --> 00:15:38,959 ‐ Hey, man, didn't you say you were gonna sell those iPads? 237 00:15:38,959 --> 00:15:41,339 ‐ Yeah. ‐ So we're gonna let him pick out a case? 238 00:15:41,339 --> 00:15:43,969 [ speaking Arabic ] 239 00:15:53,697 --> 00:15:55,660 ‐ [ kissing ] 240 00:16:01,337 --> 00:16:03,174 Welcome in the Egypt. 241 00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:09,395 ‐ Oh. Ah. 242 00:16:16,367 --> 00:16:19,206 [ all laugh ] 243 00:17:03,294 --> 00:17:05,633 ‐ [ stammering ] You‐‐You criticize Trump, 244 00:17:05,633 --> 00:17:08,221 but Trump loves his family! 245 00:17:08,221 --> 00:17:11,520 He‐‐He gives them hotel, he gives them work‐‐ 246 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:13,439 you don't think about your family! 247 00:17:13,439 --> 00:17:16,070 [ Misho in Arabic ] 248 00:17:17,740 --> 00:17:19,744 [ call to prayer over P. A. ] 249 00:17:19,744 --> 00:17:22,792 Man, I've never heard the call to prayer this loud, man. 250 00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:24,754 There's a mosque right there. We can pray Isha'a. 251 00:17:24,754 --> 00:17:28,303 ‐ Ramy, don't be so stubborn, nigga. 252 00:17:28,303 --> 00:17:30,056 I‐I told all my friends in there 253 00:17:30,056 --> 00:17:31,935 that I was gonna show up with my cousin from America. 254 00:17:31,935 --> 00:17:33,522 Don't make me look like a bitch, man. 255 00:17:33,522 --> 00:17:35,233 ‐ I'm not tryin' to, man, I'm just‐‐ 256 00:17:35,233 --> 00:17:37,572 ‐ Look, I promise it'll be awesome. 257 00:17:37,572 --> 00:17:40,035 Plus, there's a ton of hot chicks in there. 258 00:17:40,035 --> 00:17:41,872 ‐ That's, like, the last thing I want right now. 259 00:17:41,872 --> 00:17:44,628 Like, I came here to get clarity, not hook up. 260 00:17:44,628 --> 00:17:48,217 ‐ Look, man, I been dyin' to see you and hang out with you, 261 00:17:48,217 --> 00:17:50,514 and I kinda feel like you don't wanna hang out with me. 262 00:17:51,140 --> 00:17:52,810 ‐ Dude, I‐‐I just‐‐ 263 00:17:52,810 --> 00:17:55,608 ‐ Come on, man, I practically set up this whole thing for you, man. 264 00:17:55,608 --> 00:17:57,027 ‐ All right, man, thank you. 265 00:17:57,027 --> 00:17:59,239 Let's go. ‐ Awright, boy! 266 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:07,381 [ auto‐tuned voice singing in Arabic ] 267 00:18:18,486 --> 00:18:21,785 SHADI: Hey, yo, motherfuckers, this is my cousin Ramy from America! 268 00:18:21,785 --> 00:18:23,831 [ all cheer ] 269 00:18:23,831 --> 00:18:26,377 [ man, in Arabic ] 270 00:18:26,377 --> 00:18:27,797 What's up, man? 271 00:18:27,797 --> 00:18:29,759 ‐ Captain America! ‐ What up, my nigga! 272 00:18:29,759 --> 00:18:31,888 ‐ What's up. ‐ We used to live on the same block 273 00:18:31,888 --> 00:18:34,644 as Shadi, man. I remember you when you were this small, dude. 274 00:18:34,644 --> 00:18:36,147 ‐ Oh, okay, cool, yeah. 275 00:18:36,147 --> 00:18:38,819 It's‐‐It's.... It's been a while, sorry I don't remember. 276 00:18:38,819 --> 00:18:40,698 I was...eight. ‐ It's all good. 277 00:18:40,698 --> 00:18:42,242 How ya like Egypt, man? 278 00:18:42,242 --> 00:18:45,290 ‐ Uh, haven't really had the chance to see it yet, 279 00:18:45,290 --> 00:18:46,500 like, all of it, you know? 280 00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:48,421 So I'm lookin' forward to that. 281 00:18:48,421 --> 00:18:51,385 ‐ I mean, it's been complicated the last couple years. Thanks, man. 282 00:18:51,385 --> 00:18:53,682 ‐ You mean, like, like, since the revolution and stuff, yeah? 283 00:18:53,682 --> 00:18:56,646 I was asking Shadi earlier, I really wanna see Tahrir, man. 284 00:18:56,646 --> 00:18:58,734 It's‐it's so cool that you guys were all there, 285 00:18:58,734 --> 00:19:00,613 I mean, it's‐‐it's amazing. 286 00:19:00,613 --> 00:19:02,867 ‐ Yeah. Anyway, peace out, man. Cheers. 287 00:19:02,867 --> 00:19:04,913 SHADI: I'll see you in a bit. ‐ See you later, yeah. 288 00:19:04,913 --> 00:19:07,292 ‐ Bro, could you not talk about that shit? 289 00:19:07,292 --> 00:19:09,589 It just brings in a lot of negative energy. 290 00:19:09,589 --> 00:19:11,050 I'm just‐‐I'm just saying. 291 00:19:11,885 --> 00:19:13,806 ‐ Okay. Yeah. Um... 292 00:19:15,141 --> 00:19:16,937 I'm gonna‐‐ I'm just gonna get some fresh air. 293 00:19:16,937 --> 00:19:18,816 ‐ Sure, man. Do your thing. I'll be around. 294 00:19:18,816 --> 00:19:20,443 ‐ Yeah. ‐ All right. I'll be right here. 295 00:19:22,405 --> 00:19:24,702 [ house music playing ] 296 00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:29,879 [ Arabic chatter ] 297 00:19:38,730 --> 00:19:39,732 [ Woman in Arabic ] 298 00:19:44,784 --> 00:19:46,538 ‐ Uh...hi. 299 00:19:54,303 --> 00:19:56,558 ‐ Oh, okay. 300 00:20:17,975 --> 00:20:19,520 ‐ [ laughs ] 301 00:20:24,446 --> 00:20:25,448 Oh. 302 00:20:35,552 --> 00:20:37,263 ‐ Okay. 303 00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:44,612 ‐ It's, like, the Nile? 304 00:20:46,741 --> 00:20:48,285 ‐ Uh, okay. 305 00:20:52,753 --> 00:20:53,922 ‐ Okay, yeah. 306 00:20:57,012 --> 00:20:59,642 [ music continues ] 307 00:21:02,022 --> 00:21:03,190 RAMY: Yo. ‐ SHADI: Bro. 308 00:21:03,190 --> 00:21:07,198 Yo, man, I‐‐ I just met someone, I‐I think she's your friend? 309 00:21:07,198 --> 00:21:09,579 This, like, really...cute girl, she‐‐ 310 00:21:09,579 --> 00:21:11,624 she said they were going to another party that was more chill. 311 00:21:11,624 --> 00:21:12,960 Maybe we could go with them? 312 00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:15,423 ‐ Dude, that's fuckin' awesome. You found a chick already? 313 00:21:15,423 --> 00:21:17,010 I knew my cousin was a player! 314 00:21:17,010 --> 00:21:18,429 You're like fuckin' Hitch, man. 315 00:21:18,429 --> 00:21:20,099 Here. Try this. 316 00:21:20,099 --> 00:21:21,811 ‐ What? ‐ Hitch. 317 00:21:21,811 --> 00:21:24,692 Will Smith in that film? He's really good with chicks? 318 00:21:24,692 --> 00:21:26,236 ‐ No, yeah, but, du‐‐ 319 00:21:26,236 --> 00:21:27,238 [ snorting ] 320 00:21:27,238 --> 00:21:30,662 Shadi, I‐‐ ‐ It'll help with the jet lag. 321 00:21:30,662 --> 00:21:32,248 ‐ Are you serious, bro? 322 00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:34,044 ‐ What? 323 00:21:34,044 --> 00:21:35,213 ‐ I‐‐ 324 00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:39,764 [ places tray down ] 325 00:21:39,764 --> 00:21:42,603 Bro...can I talk to you outside for a minute? 326 00:21:51,996 --> 00:21:53,249 What the fuck, bro? 327 00:21:53,249 --> 00:21:55,253 Like, what are you on about? 328 00:21:56,004 --> 00:21:57,716 I thought you were cool, man, from New York‐‐ 329 00:21:57,716 --> 00:21:59,261 I thought you were my nigga, man. 330 00:21:59,261 --> 00:22:01,808 ‐ All right, dude, you really gotta stop saying that. 331 00:22:01,808 --> 00:22:03,603 ‐ Saying what? ‐ The N‐word. 332 00:22:03,603 --> 00:22:05,649 You can't say that shit, you can't just shout it. 333 00:22:05,649 --> 00:22:07,611 You realize how offensive that is to black people? 334 00:22:07,611 --> 00:22:11,160 ‐ Dude, Egypt's in Africa! We're African! 335 00:22:11,160 --> 00:22:13,330 You're black, I'm black‐‐ we can say that shit. 336 00:22:13,330 --> 00:22:15,084 ‐ No, dude, I am not black. 337 00:22:15,084 --> 00:22:16,921 ‐ I didn't know you were so judgy, bro. 338 00:22:16,921 --> 00:22:19,009 You judged me earlier for not prayin', 339 00:22:19,009 --> 00:22:21,430 and now‐‐ and now you tell me what I can say and what I can't say? 340 00:22:21,430 --> 00:22:24,060 ‐ I'm just worried about you, dude. You're doin' coke. That's dangerous. 341 00:22:24,060 --> 00:22:25,146 ‐ What do you think of us here? 342 00:22:25,146 --> 00:22:28,402 Y‐you're comin' in here, talkin' to people about the revolution and shit. 343 00:22:28,402 --> 00:22:32,661 Bro, we saw people die in front of our fuckin' eyes. 344 00:22:32,661 --> 00:22:34,540 You think we wanna keep talkin' about that shit? 345 00:22:35,542 --> 00:22:39,466 Man, Todi, his sister went to jail for holding up a sign, 346 00:22:39,466 --> 00:22:41,261 and she fuckin' died. 347 00:22:41,261 --> 00:22:43,474 And I see you being all spiritual and shit 348 00:22:43,474 --> 00:22:45,478 and trying to make meaning of all of this? 349 00:22:46,564 --> 00:22:48,777 Look, I don't know where God is, 350 00:22:48,777 --> 00:22:51,240 but I sure as fuck know he's not here right now. 351 00:22:53,244 --> 00:22:55,624 I'm lost, man. Everybody's lost. 352 00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:57,711 I'm like fuckin' Ashton Kutcher, 353 00:22:57,711 --> 00:23:00,258 but I'm like, "Dude, where's my country?" 354 00:23:00,258 --> 00:23:01,678 I don't know. 355 00:23:01,678 --> 00:23:03,138 I don't fuckin' know. 356 00:23:03,974 --> 00:23:06,854 So yeah, I thought you were my nigga. 357 00:23:06,854 --> 00:23:08,566 But I guess I was wrong, man. 358 00:23:20,214 --> 00:23:21,383 [ sighs ] 359 00:23:26,894 --> 00:23:29,024 [ chatter, music ] 360 00:23:31,821 --> 00:23:33,825 Dude, what the fuck are you doing? 361 00:23:35,411 --> 00:23:37,498 ‐ Dude, I‐‐ I'm sorry, man. 362 00:23:37,498 --> 00:23:39,503 I was being really selfish and‐‐ 363 00:23:39,503 --> 00:23:40,964 ‐ No, man, that's not what I'm talk‐‐ 364 00:23:40,964 --> 00:23:43,093 Did you just drink all that water out of the tap? 365 00:23:43,093 --> 00:23:44,346 ‐ Yeah. 366 00:23:44,346 --> 00:23:47,853 ‐ Shit, man, you can't be drinkin' water out of the sink in Cairo, bro. 367 00:23:47,853 --> 00:23:49,481 That shit'll fuck up your body. 368 00:23:50,692 --> 00:23:51,986 [ snorting ] 369 00:23:53,155 --> 00:23:54,449 Ahh. 370 00:23:54,449 --> 00:23:57,330 You're gonna be so fucked later, bro. 371 00:24:04,512 --> 00:24:06,181 [ flatulent sounds ] 372 00:24:08,185 --> 00:24:09,354 [ groans ] 373 00:24:12,193 --> 00:24:13,278 Okay. 374 00:24:36,450 --> 00:24:37,536 Yeah. 375 00:24:46,888 --> 00:24:48,098 Hey. 376 00:24:48,098 --> 00:24:50,729 ‐ Um... 377 00:24:50,729 --> 00:24:52,440 wh‐what are you doing here? 378 00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:55,780 ‐ I was just getting some water. Are you okay? 379 00:24:57,618 --> 00:24:59,788 What did my brother do to you you? 380 00:24:59,788 --> 00:25:01,709 I'm sorry, I know how Shadi gets. 381 00:25:03,003 --> 00:25:07,679 ‐ Yeah, Sh‐Shadi, your... your brother. Yeah. 382 00:25:07,679 --> 00:25:09,808 My, um, my cousin. 383 00:25:09,808 --> 00:25:11,436 I, um... 384 00:25:11,436 --> 00:25:13,232 I need to use the‐‐ Sorry. 385 00:25:18,283 --> 00:25:21,791 ‐ [ groaning loudly ] ‐ [ defecating ] 386 00:25:24,462 --> 00:25:26,216 [ continues defecating ] 387 00:25:27,301 --> 00:25:28,470 [ sighs ] 388 00:25:29,305 --> 00:25:33,272 [ amplified call to prayer in Arabic ] 389 00:25:41,371 --> 00:25:45,337 [ call to prayer continues ] 390 00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:41,366 [ call to prayer continues ]