1 00:00:07,687 --> 00:00:12,687 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:51,861 --> 00:00:55,731 When I was a child, we would go to this cove 3 00:00:55,831 --> 00:00:59,367 under the cliffs called Hope Gap. 4 00:00:59,467 --> 00:01:04,872 When the tide was out, these little rock pools appeared. 5 00:01:04,971 --> 00:01:08,241 And in the pools were tiny sea creatures. 6 00:01:15,480 --> 00:01:17,883 My mother would sit on the rocks and wait 7 00:01:17,982 --> 00:01:19,016 for me while I explored. 8 00:01:22,186 --> 00:01:26,723 I never asked myself what she was thinking 9 00:01:26,823 --> 00:01:27,923 or if she was happy. 10 00:01:30,959 --> 00:01:32,227 You don't, do you? 11 00:02:03,420 --> 00:02:06,757 A lonely impulse of delight is it Gary. 12 00:02:06,857 --> 00:02:07,657 How is that? 13 00:02:07,758 --> 00:02:08,658 Oh, it's you, Grace. 14 00:02:08,758 --> 00:02:11,059 It's a poem, WB Yeats. 15 00:02:11,159 --> 00:02:14,095 Always with the poetry, eh, Grace. 16 00:02:14,196 --> 00:02:18,633 Nor law, nor duty bade me fight, nor public men, 17 00:02:18,733 --> 00:02:23,404 nor cheering crowds, a lonely impulse of delight 18 00:02:23,504 --> 00:02:26,039 drove to this tumult in the clouds. 19 00:02:26,139 --> 00:02:29,041 Oh, bollocks. 20 00:02:29,141 --> 00:02:33,378 I balanced all, brought all to mind. 21 00:02:33,479 --> 00:02:37,281 The years to come seemed a waste of breath. 22 00:02:37,381 --> 00:02:41,752 A waste of breath, the years behind in balance 23 00:02:41,853 --> 00:02:44,354 with this life, this death. 24 00:02:47,022 --> 00:02:47,791 Good day? 25 00:02:47,891 --> 00:02:50,961 Uh, much the usual. 26 00:02:51,060 --> 00:02:53,596 How was your day, Grace? 27 00:02:53,696 --> 00:02:54,563 Was? 28 00:02:54,663 --> 00:02:55,898 Oh, yeah. 29 00:02:55,997 --> 00:02:59,299 I did our walk to Hope Gap. 30 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:01,635 I haven't done it for ages. 31 00:03:01,736 --> 00:03:04,471 Remember how Jamie used to love going there? 32 00:03:04,571 --> 00:03:07,941 Yes, of course. 33 00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:10,443 Sometimes I miss him so much. 34 00:03:22,386 --> 00:03:24,555 Did you make me a cup of tea? 35 00:03:24,655 --> 00:03:26,422 I thought you had one? 36 00:03:26,523 --> 00:03:27,457 It's gone cold. 37 00:03:32,861 --> 00:03:36,197 Why is it you only ever drink half your tea I wonder. 38 00:03:36,297 --> 00:03:38,666 I wonder that, too. 39 00:03:38,766 --> 00:03:42,102 Ah, I suppose it's because I don't like things to end. 40 00:03:42,202 --> 00:03:44,070 You're a non-completer. 41 00:03:44,170 --> 00:03:45,605 Oh, am I? 42 00:03:45,705 --> 00:03:47,072 Are you a completer? 43 00:03:47,172 --> 00:03:49,375 Up to a point. 44 00:03:49,475 --> 00:03:52,511 Can one complete anything up to a point? 45 00:03:52,611 --> 00:03:53,379 I don't think so. 46 00:03:55,046 --> 00:03:57,482 Well, I do wish Jamie would come home. 47 00:03:57,582 --> 00:03:58,182 It's been months. 48 00:03:58,283 --> 00:03:59,717 He's got his own life. 49 00:03:59,817 --> 00:04:04,688 Well, of course, he has, but why doesn't it include us? 50 00:04:04,788 --> 00:04:05,489 Are you Wiki-ing? 51 00:04:05,589 --> 00:04:06,790 Yes. 52 00:04:06,890 --> 00:04:09,292 You never complete that. 53 00:04:09,392 --> 00:04:11,761 You can't complete Wikipedia. 54 00:04:17,298 --> 00:04:24,004 Napoleon marched 450,000 men across the Neman. 55 00:04:24,103 --> 00:04:27,674 Less than 20,000 came back. 56 00:04:27,774 --> 00:04:32,244 The surprisingly large number of the officers kept diaries. 57 00:04:32,344 --> 00:04:35,480 Over 150 have survived. 58 00:04:35,581 --> 00:04:38,583 Remarkable, really given the conditions on the retreat. 59 00:04:41,519 --> 00:04:45,255 As the men dropped in the intense cold, 60 00:04:45,355 --> 00:04:49,325 they were stripped of clothing by their own comrades 61 00:04:49,425 --> 00:04:53,329 and left naked in the snow still alive. 62 00:04:56,065 --> 00:04:58,833 It was a kind of survival strategy. 63 00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:02,636 In extremest, men can be cruel. 64 00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:03,670 Is that wrong? 65 00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:05,104 Do we blame them? 66 00:05:05,204 --> 00:05:08,674 Would any of us have behaved any better? 67 00:05:08,774 --> 00:05:09,375 Robbie? 68 00:05:12,912 --> 00:05:14,379 I wouldn't have stripped them. 69 00:05:14,479 --> 00:05:18,049 You'd have left them to die with their clothes on? 70 00:05:18,148 --> 00:05:19,350 Yes. 71 00:05:19,450 --> 00:05:22,853 Out of compassion or modesty? 72 00:05:22,953 --> 00:05:27,091 It's really hard getting people's clothes off. 73 00:05:27,190 --> 00:05:28,491 So it is. 74 00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:34,997 Well, it's been a while, and I was thinking. 75 00:05:35,097 --> 00:05:36,430 Oh, thank you, Jamie. 76 00:05:36,531 --> 00:05:39,634 Are you sure you can manage? 77 00:05:39,734 --> 00:05:40,334 I'll tell Grace. 78 00:05:40,434 --> 00:05:43,104 She'll be so pleased. 79 00:05:43,203 --> 00:05:45,205 Some time after lunch on Saturday. 80 00:05:48,273 --> 00:05:49,943 When men were wounded or frostbitten 81 00:05:50,043 --> 00:05:53,312 and men could no longer walk, orders were given to carry 82 00:05:53,412 --> 00:05:56,115 them on the baggage wagons. 83 00:05:56,214 --> 00:05:58,082 This slowed the wagons down, of course, 84 00:05:58,182 --> 00:06:00,450 and reduced the chances that the baggage train 85 00:06:00,551 --> 00:06:03,587 would make it to Smolensk. 86 00:06:03,687 --> 00:06:08,457 So the wagon drivers looked out for especially rotted ground 87 00:06:08,557 --> 00:06:11,360 and then drove fast over it so that the wounded 88 00:06:11,460 --> 00:06:16,264 would be jolted off the wagons without anyone noticing. 89 00:06:16,364 --> 00:06:20,567 Once left behind on the road, they froze to death. 90 00:06:20,668 --> 00:06:22,870 This was understood to be an accident. 91 00:06:25,438 --> 00:06:28,775 Nobody looked back. 92 00:06:28,875 --> 00:06:29,742 Nobody looked back. 93 00:06:32,945 --> 00:06:36,280 I have been here before. 94 00:06:36,380 --> 00:06:38,349 What's that? 95 00:06:38,449 --> 00:06:44,121 My anthology, that's what I should call it. 96 00:06:44,220 --> 00:06:46,056 The idea is whatever you're going through, 97 00:06:46,157 --> 00:06:49,525 someone's been through it before you, put it into words. 98 00:06:49,625 --> 00:06:52,061 It's the first line of a poem by Rossetti. 99 00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:53,762 What is? 100 00:06:53,862 --> 00:06:56,065 I have been here before. 101 00:06:56,165 --> 00:06:58,599 Jamie's coming for the weekend. 102 00:06:58,700 --> 00:07:00,902 Jamie's coming? 103 00:07:01,002 --> 00:07:04,071 Some time after lunch on Saturday. 104 00:07:04,172 --> 00:07:05,906 How do you know? 105 00:07:06,006 --> 00:07:07,941 We spoke on the phone. 106 00:07:08,041 --> 00:07:08,942 He rang you? 107 00:07:09,042 --> 00:07:09,842 Why? 108 00:07:09,942 --> 00:07:11,343 To say he was coming. 109 00:07:11,444 --> 00:07:12,745 Why did he ring you? 110 00:07:12,845 --> 00:07:13,378 I don't know. 111 00:07:13,478 --> 00:07:15,980 He does sometimes. 112 00:07:16,081 --> 00:07:17,247 Does he? 113 00:07:20,784 --> 00:07:22,886 When was the last time Jamie came home? 114 00:07:22,986 --> 00:07:24,054 April was it? 115 00:07:24,154 --> 00:07:25,989 He's got his own life to live. 116 00:07:38,232 --> 00:07:40,135 Hi, it's Kelly. 117 00:07:40,234 --> 00:07:41,402 I can't come to the phone right now 118 00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:42,870 but please leave me a message and I'll 119 00:07:42,970 --> 00:07:45,039 call you back as soon as I can. 120 00:07:45,139 --> 00:07:46,539 Hi, Kelly. 121 00:07:46,639 --> 00:07:47,841 It's Jamie. 122 00:07:47,941 --> 00:07:50,509 I'm away over the weekend. 123 00:07:50,609 --> 00:07:52,277 I'll be back by 6:00 on Sunday. 124 00:07:52,377 --> 00:07:54,947 If you're around, it'd be great to see you. 125 00:07:55,047 --> 00:07:55,748 OK, bye. 126 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:24,772 Hello, stranger. 127 00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:27,007 Hello, Mom. 128 00:08:27,107 --> 00:08:28,775 Hello, stranger. 129 00:08:28,875 --> 00:08:31,744 Hello, Mom. 130 00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:33,045 Jamie. 131 00:08:33,146 --> 00:08:33,945 Dad. 132 00:08:34,045 --> 00:08:35,380 Jamie, Jamie. 133 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:36,413 Thanks for coming. 134 00:08:36,515 --> 00:08:37,149 How was your journey? 135 00:08:37,249 --> 00:08:38,150 Not bad. 136 00:08:38,250 --> 00:08:39,617 I got the 3:46. 137 00:08:39,717 --> 00:08:40,684 Running late. 138 00:08:40,785 --> 00:08:42,052 Only just made the connection at Lewis. 139 00:08:42,153 --> 00:08:44,621 Can't trust the trains these days. 140 00:08:44,721 --> 00:08:46,790 I'll just... I'll drop my stuff off. 141 00:09:30,226 --> 00:09:31,861 Do you think he's happy? 142 00:09:31,961 --> 00:09:34,297 I think he's happy in that flat of his. 143 00:09:34,396 --> 00:09:36,231 Do you? 144 00:09:36,330 --> 00:09:37,364 All on his own? 145 00:09:37,464 --> 00:09:39,433 Well, there's that, of course. 146 00:09:39,533 --> 00:09:42,903 But he has it the way he wants it. 147 00:09:43,003 --> 00:09:44,871 No washing up to speak of. 148 00:09:44,972 --> 00:09:48,575 You use a plate, wash it, and there it is ready to use again. 149 00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:50,009 You do not run out of milk because you're 150 00:09:50,109 --> 00:09:51,910 the only one drinking it, so you know how much 151 00:09:52,010 --> 00:09:53,313 there is left in the fridge. 152 00:09:53,412 --> 00:09:56,281 Just little things, I know, but they have value. 153 00:09:56,380 --> 00:09:58,749 Well, you sound as if you envy him. 154 00:09:58,850 --> 00:10:00,151 No. 155 00:10:00,251 --> 00:10:03,653 Well, I don't think it's good for anyone, hiding in a hole, 156 00:10:03,753 --> 00:10:06,323 having everything always be the same. 157 00:10:06,422 --> 00:10:08,457 Jamie, are you going to be long? 158 00:10:08,557 --> 00:10:10,459 Not long. 159 00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:13,796 Let's have candles to celebrate Jamie coming home. 160 00:10:13,896 --> 00:10:15,530 Yes, why not. 161 00:10:15,630 --> 00:10:20,235 Next week, we'll have been married 29 years. 162 00:10:20,335 --> 00:10:21,969 Yes, I suppose we will. 163 00:10:24,638 --> 00:10:27,207 Do you have something in mind? 164 00:10:27,307 --> 00:10:29,141 What do you mean? 165 00:10:29,242 --> 00:10:31,509 Well, where we go out for dinner. 166 00:10:31,610 --> 00:10:35,747 If that's what you'd want. 167 00:10:35,847 --> 00:10:37,349 No, it isn't. 168 00:10:37,448 --> 00:10:38,316 It isn't? 169 00:10:38,415 --> 00:10:39,351 No. 170 00:10:39,450 --> 00:10:40,484 All right, then we won't go out. 171 00:10:40,584 --> 00:10:42,086 Oh, for God's sake, Edward. 172 00:10:42,186 --> 00:10:43,653 Did I say something wrong? 173 00:10:43,754 --> 00:10:46,156 Well, I say will we go out for dinner on our anniversary 174 00:10:46,257 --> 00:10:49,458 and you say if that's what you want and I say it isn't and you 175 00:10:49,558 --> 00:10:51,060 say then we won't. 176 00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:53,729 But I do want to go out for dinner on our anniversary. 177 00:10:53,829 --> 00:10:54,963 Why do you think I suggested it? 178 00:10:55,063 --> 00:10:56,497 Then why say you don't? 179 00:10:56,597 --> 00:10:58,733 Because I don't want to do it because I want to do it. 180 00:10:58,833 --> 00:11:01,468 I want to do it because you want to do it. 181 00:11:01,568 --> 00:11:02,869 So do you want to do it? 182 00:11:02,970 --> 00:11:03,803 Yes. 183 00:11:03,904 --> 00:11:05,138 So will you book somewhere? 184 00:11:05,238 --> 00:11:06,539 Yeah. 185 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:09,342 Not that awful place you chose last year. 186 00:11:09,441 --> 00:11:12,144 Maybe you should make booking. 187 00:11:12,244 --> 00:11:14,612 Do I have to do everything? 188 00:11:18,216 --> 00:11:20,484 Will you be coming to mass in the morning, Jamie? 189 00:11:20,584 --> 00:11:23,420 Mom, you know I don't do that anymore. 190 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:25,122 Why not? 191 00:11:25,222 --> 00:11:26,290 Have you stopped believing in God? 192 00:11:26,390 --> 00:11:27,757 More or less. 193 00:11:27,857 --> 00:11:28,891 Why? 194 00:11:28,991 --> 00:11:31,559 Is it because of all the suffering in the world? 195 00:11:31,660 --> 00:11:33,296 That's a part of it, yes. 196 00:11:33,396 --> 00:11:35,597 But don't you see, that's exactly 197 00:11:35,697 --> 00:11:37,799 why there has to be a God. 198 00:11:37,899 --> 00:11:40,034 If this world was all there is, how could we bear it? 199 00:11:40,135 --> 00:11:42,937 Edward, explain why God allows the suffering. 200 00:11:43,037 --> 00:11:47,507 It's, um... it's about free will, isn't it. 201 00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:48,408 Jamie knows all this. 202 00:11:48,507 --> 00:11:49,275 No, no, go on. 203 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:50,243 Explain. 204 00:11:50,343 --> 00:11:51,677 I do know the arguments. 205 00:11:51,777 --> 00:11:52,878 No, but if you understood properly, you'd believe. 206 00:11:52,978 --> 00:11:55,314 Look, as far as I can see, the world's 207 00:11:55,414 --> 00:11:59,016 a frightening place where things happen that aren't fair, 208 00:11:59,116 --> 00:12:01,685 and there isn't really any meaning to any of it. 209 00:12:01,786 --> 00:12:04,422 And in the end, we all get wiped out. 210 00:12:04,521 --> 00:12:06,189 We can't bear that, so we invent God 211 00:12:06,289 --> 00:12:09,858 and heaven to reassure ourselves it'll all work out in the end. 212 00:12:09,959 --> 00:12:11,660 I don't think that's a bad thing to do. 213 00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:14,330 I just happen to think it's not true. 214 00:12:14,430 --> 00:12:16,497 You're wrong. 215 00:12:16,597 --> 00:12:17,433 Tell him, Edward. 216 00:12:17,532 --> 00:12:19,000 Tell him what? 217 00:12:19,100 --> 00:12:20,301 That God exists. 218 00:12:20,401 --> 00:12:23,570 You can't tell people a thing like. 219 00:12:23,670 --> 00:12:25,305 God's not information. 220 00:12:25,405 --> 00:12:28,908 God's a conviction. 221 00:12:29,008 --> 00:12:30,543 It's like love. 222 00:12:30,643 --> 00:12:31,944 You don't tell love. 223 00:12:32,044 --> 00:12:33,012 You feel love. 224 00:12:33,112 --> 00:12:35,513 That's right. 225 00:12:35,613 --> 00:12:37,415 That's just how it is. 226 00:12:37,514 --> 00:12:38,316 Coffee? 227 00:12:38,416 --> 00:12:40,985 Yes, I'd like that. 228 00:12:41,085 --> 00:12:43,887 I can't bear to think you're unhappy, Jamie. 229 00:12:43,988 --> 00:12:45,255 I'm not unhappy. 230 00:12:45,356 --> 00:12:46,156 I'm fine. 231 00:12:46,256 --> 00:12:47,557 No, all on your own? 232 00:12:47,657 --> 00:12:49,292 I'm fine, Mom. 233 00:12:49,392 --> 00:12:50,326 All right. 234 00:12:50,426 --> 00:12:51,927 Fine isn't the same as happy. 235 00:12:52,027 --> 00:12:53,195 Well, who's happy? 236 00:12:53,295 --> 00:12:54,495 Fine's fine. 237 00:12:54,596 --> 00:12:57,432 No, we're happy, aren't we, Edward? 238 00:12:57,531 --> 00:12:59,867 Yes, we're fine. 239 00:12:59,967 --> 00:13:01,769 I hope you don't mind, but I'm 240 00:13:01,869 --> 00:13:03,304 under big pressure at work. 241 00:13:03,404 --> 00:13:04,604 I thought I'd give it a couple of hours 242 00:13:04,704 --> 00:13:06,072 before I call it a night. 243 00:13:06,172 --> 00:13:07,706 Whatever you want, darling. 244 00:13:41,935 --> 00:13:44,071 I don't think I'll make mass tomorrow morning. 245 00:13:44,171 --> 00:13:46,606 I've got all the coursework papers to mark. 246 00:13:46,706 --> 00:13:50,309 I'd rather get it done while I'm fresh. 247 00:13:50,410 --> 00:13:53,346 We are happy, aren't we? 248 00:13:53,446 --> 00:13:55,947 Why wouldn't we be? 249 00:13:56,048 --> 00:14:00,718 Sometimes I think we don't really talk. 250 00:14:00,818 --> 00:14:02,286 What do you mean talk? 251 00:14:02,386 --> 00:14:04,921 You know, talk the way people do. 252 00:14:08,557 --> 00:14:12,027 It's like magic, isn't it? 253 00:14:12,127 --> 00:14:14,430 You see, we don't talk. 254 00:14:14,530 --> 00:14:17,031 What? 255 00:14:17,131 --> 00:14:19,333 I say things. 256 00:14:19,434 --> 00:14:20,401 Why don't you say things? 257 00:14:20,501 --> 00:14:22,170 What do you want me to say? 258 00:14:22,270 --> 00:14:23,337 Anything. 259 00:14:23,438 --> 00:14:24,905 Whatever comes into your head. 260 00:14:25,005 --> 00:14:28,341 Well, I've become fascinated by the eyewitness accounts 261 00:14:28,442 --> 00:14:29,275 of the retreat from Moscow. 262 00:14:29,376 --> 00:14:31,277 Ugh, that's not talking. 263 00:14:31,377 --> 00:14:32,744 That's Wiki-ing. 264 00:14:32,844 --> 00:14:34,280 I mean talk, you and me. 265 00:14:39,616 --> 00:14:40,918 Is this what you want? 266 00:14:43,586 --> 00:14:45,155 No. 267 00:14:45,255 --> 00:14:48,191 If this isn't what you want, then what is? 268 00:14:48,291 --> 00:14:49,725 I know I annoy you sometimes. 269 00:14:49,826 --> 00:14:51,561 No, that's about how I feel. 270 00:14:51,660 --> 00:14:52,761 I want to know how you feel. 271 00:14:52,861 --> 00:14:55,230 Feel about what? 272 00:14:55,330 --> 00:14:58,866 What would make you happier? 273 00:14:58,966 --> 00:15:00,868 I suppose if you were happy. 274 00:15:00,968 --> 00:15:02,236 No, no, talk about you. 275 00:15:04,938 --> 00:15:06,606 I don't want anything special. 276 00:15:06,706 --> 00:15:08,841 But you do want something? 277 00:15:08,942 --> 00:15:12,377 There's something two people can have that we haven't 278 00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:14,812 got that you wish we had. 279 00:15:14,913 --> 00:15:15,514 Yes. 280 00:15:15,613 --> 00:15:16,848 What is it? 281 00:15:16,948 --> 00:15:18,517 I don't know how to explain. 282 00:15:18,616 --> 00:15:23,588 Well... think of a word, any word, the first 283 00:15:23,687 --> 00:15:25,088 word comes to your head. 284 00:15:25,188 --> 00:15:26,022 Sunny. 285 00:15:26,123 --> 00:15:27,124 Sunny? 286 00:15:27,224 --> 00:15:28,525 It's only one word. There's others. 287 00:15:28,624 --> 00:15:29,792 All right give me some other words. 288 00:15:29,892 --> 00:15:30,759 - I don't want to do this. - Why not? 289 00:15:30,860 --> 00:15:31,961 I'll only make it worse. 290 00:15:32,061 --> 00:15:33,195 How will it make things worse? 291 00:15:33,295 --> 00:15:34,629 Because whatever I say will be wrong. 292 00:15:34,729 --> 00:15:35,730 Well, it can't be wrong if it's true. 293 00:15:35,830 --> 00:15:36,865 Or not enough. 294 00:15:36,965 --> 00:15:38,133 What do you mean not enough? 295 00:15:38,233 --> 00:15:41,135 I think you want something I haven't got. 296 00:15:41,235 --> 00:15:43,669 What? 297 00:15:43,770 --> 00:15:47,974 I always somehow feel that I'm in the wrong. 298 00:15:48,074 --> 00:15:49,708 I don't care about who's right or wrong. 299 00:15:49,809 --> 00:15:50,742 I just want you to be there. Here. 300 00:15:50,842 --> 00:15:51,477 I am... I am here. 301 00:15:51,577 --> 00:15:52,211 No, you're not. 302 00:15:52,311 --> 00:15:52,978 I am here. 303 00:15:53,078 --> 00:15:54,346 No, you're not. 304 00:15:54,446 --> 00:15:56,248 It's like somehow you've sneaked away when I wasn't looking. 305 00:15:56,348 --> 00:15:58,617 I don't know how else to put it. 306 00:15:58,716 --> 00:15:59,817 What are you doing? 307 00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:02,685 I'm putting out the breakfast things. 308 00:16:02,785 --> 00:16:03,987 Put that down. 309 00:16:07,290 --> 00:16:07,924 Look at me. 310 00:16:12,728 --> 00:16:14,229 You say you don't tell love. 311 00:16:14,329 --> 00:16:15,497 You feel love. 312 00:16:15,597 --> 00:16:17,432 But how am I to know if you never say it. 313 00:16:17,533 --> 00:16:18,799 It's just assumed. 314 00:16:18,900 --> 00:16:20,268 It's just there. 315 00:16:20,368 --> 00:16:24,605 Even so, just to help me, please say it. 316 00:16:24,704 --> 00:16:25,906 I can't now. 317 00:16:26,006 --> 00:16:27,073 It wouldn't mean anything. 318 00:16:27,174 --> 00:16:28,341 Why not? 319 00:16:28,441 --> 00:16:30,142 I'd only be saying it because you asked me to say it. 320 00:16:30,242 --> 00:16:30,910 I don't mind. 321 00:16:31,010 --> 00:16:31,944 This is childish, Grace. 322 00:16:32,044 --> 00:16:32,645 Say it! 323 00:16:32,744 --> 00:16:33,978 Why are you doing this? 324 00:16:34,078 --> 00:16:35,146 Why are you making everything into a problem? 325 00:16:35,246 --> 00:16:36,247 This isn't anything to do with me. 326 00:16:36,347 --> 00:16:37,015 This is your problem. 327 00:16:38,049 --> 00:16:40,218 Don't ever say that to me again. 328 00:16:40,318 --> 00:16:41,319 You're part of this. 329 00:16:41,419 --> 00:16:43,253 You're involved whether you like it or not. 330 00:16:50,126 --> 00:16:51,726 Do something. 331 00:16:51,826 --> 00:16:54,329 Say something. 332 00:16:54,429 --> 00:16:55,897 If you hate me, say you hate me. 333 00:16:55,997 --> 00:16:57,165 Say you want to leave me. 334 00:16:57,265 --> 00:16:58,333 Say you want to kill me. 335 00:16:58,433 --> 00:17:00,301 Tell me something real. 336 00:17:00,401 --> 00:17:02,469 I'm tired. 337 00:17:02,570 --> 00:17:04,572 I want to go to bed. 338 00:17:04,672 --> 00:17:06,072 We'll talk about it in the morning. 339 00:17:49,675 --> 00:17:51,210 What happened? 340 00:17:51,310 --> 00:17:53,878 I did it. 341 00:17:53,979 --> 00:17:57,349 Were you going for him again? 342 00:17:57,449 --> 00:17:58,583 He should fight back. 343 00:17:58,683 --> 00:17:59,850 Is that what you want, a fight? 344 00:17:59,950 --> 00:18:01,919 I want a reaction. 345 00:18:02,019 --> 00:18:03,853 I want a real marriage. 346 00:18:03,953 --> 00:18:06,456 What is he so afraid of? 347 00:18:06,557 --> 00:18:07,991 Why does he walk away from me? 348 00:18:08,091 --> 00:18:08,925 Because you go for him. 349 00:18:09,025 --> 00:18:12,562 Oh, I don't go for him. 350 00:18:12,662 --> 00:18:14,363 But I did hit him just now. 351 00:18:14,463 --> 00:18:15,664 Oh, Mom. 352 00:18:15,763 --> 00:18:17,599 What else am I to do? 353 00:18:17,699 --> 00:18:19,100 How else am I to get through to him? 354 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:21,736 I feel like if I can only give him a big enough shock, 355 00:18:21,835 --> 00:18:22,936 he'll wake up. 356 00:18:23,036 --> 00:18:25,772 Well, hitting him won't help. 357 00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:27,674 What do you think I should do? 358 00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:30,242 I think you should be nicer to him. 359 00:18:30,342 --> 00:18:31,143 Nicer? 360 00:18:34,346 --> 00:18:35,314 You sound like Edward. 361 00:18:35,414 --> 00:18:37,448 I think you should stop going for him. 362 00:18:37,548 --> 00:18:38,782 You said that already. 363 00:18:38,882 --> 00:18:40,518 You don't listen, do you? 364 00:18:40,618 --> 00:18:43,020 Yes, well, we've all seen what a great success 365 00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:44,321 you've made of your love life. 366 00:18:48,024 --> 00:18:49,292 Oh, I'm sorry, darling. 367 00:18:49,392 --> 00:18:50,926 I'm sorry. 368 00:18:51,027 --> 00:18:52,894 I didn't mean it. 369 00:18:52,994 --> 00:18:55,430 Actually you didn't know anything about my love life. 370 00:18:55,530 --> 00:18:56,864 Don't I? 371 00:18:56,965 --> 00:18:58,767 Have you got a secret wife somewhere? 372 00:18:58,866 --> 00:19:00,267 Secret children? 373 00:19:00,367 --> 00:19:02,403 You don't have to have a family to have a love life. 374 00:19:02,503 --> 00:19:05,406 You must admit there's something odd about you living 375 00:19:05,506 --> 00:19:07,507 alone in that flat at your age. 376 00:19:07,607 --> 00:19:10,008 Lots of people live alone. 377 00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:12,344 Edward envies you, you know. 378 00:19:12,444 --> 00:19:13,345 Oh? 379 00:19:13,445 --> 00:19:14,845 Yes, he'd love to live in your flat 380 00:19:14,946 --> 00:19:17,349 and do the same thing at the same time every day. 381 00:19:21,218 --> 00:19:23,721 It's what I rescued him from. 382 00:19:23,820 --> 00:19:25,555 Don't try rescuing me. 383 00:19:25,655 --> 00:19:27,324 I do worry about you. 384 00:19:27,424 --> 00:19:29,392 I worry about you. 385 00:19:29,492 --> 00:19:30,694 Why? 386 00:19:30,794 --> 00:19:32,294 Because Edward and I have these little rows. 387 00:19:32,394 --> 00:19:34,996 I'm just trying to keep well out of the line of fire. 388 00:19:35,096 --> 00:19:36,898 You know I love him, don't you. 389 00:19:36,998 --> 00:19:39,634 Doesn't mean anything if we quarrel from time to time. 390 00:19:39,734 --> 00:19:42,102 Oh, throw the breakfast things around? 391 00:19:42,202 --> 00:19:45,038 Well, I tipped the table up. 392 00:19:45,138 --> 00:19:46,340 Had to do something. 393 00:19:47,541 --> 00:19:48,874 I thought maybe you'd thrown them at him? 394 00:19:48,974 --> 00:19:51,577 No, wouldn't do that, not cutlery. 395 00:19:52,645 --> 00:19:54,814 I'm relieved to hear it. 396 00:19:54,913 --> 00:19:57,449 I would have cleared it up if you hadn't done it. 397 00:19:57,549 --> 00:19:59,950 Well, it's was done now. 398 00:20:00,050 --> 00:20:02,553 Thank you, darling. 399 00:20:02,653 --> 00:20:03,687 Thank you. 400 00:20:03,787 --> 00:20:06,189 I'll see you in the morning then. 401 00:20:06,289 --> 00:20:09,459 I think I may go to early mass. 402 00:20:09,559 --> 00:20:10,493 You want me to wake you? 403 00:20:10,593 --> 00:20:11,394 No. 404 00:20:11,494 --> 00:20:12,695 No, let me sleep. 405 00:20:12,795 --> 00:20:14,830 All right then, darling. 406 00:20:14,930 --> 00:20:16,465 Good night. 407 00:20:16,565 --> 00:20:17,332 Good night. 408 00:21:04,838 --> 00:21:09,609 Glory to God in the highest and on earth, peace 409 00:21:09,709 --> 00:21:12,444 is a peaceful of good will. 410 00:21:12,545 --> 00:21:19,250 We praise you, we bless you, we adore you, we glorify you. 411 00:21:19,350 --> 00:21:22,919 We give you thanks for your great glory. 412 00:21:23,019 --> 00:21:26,890 Lord God, heavenly King, oh God almighty 413 00:21:26,990 --> 00:21:30,092 father, Lord Jesus Christ... 414 00:21:30,192 --> 00:21:33,195 Only God himself, Lord God... 415 00:21:33,295 --> 00:21:37,098 Lamb of God, son of Father, you take 416 00:21:37,198 --> 00:21:39,333 away the sins of the world. 417 00:21:39,434 --> 00:21:40,934 Have mercy on us. 418 00:21:41,034 --> 00:21:42,737 Have mercy on us. 419 00:21:42,837 --> 00:21:44,237 Have mercy on us. 420 00:21:52,745 --> 00:21:55,815 When do you have to go? 421 00:21:55,915 --> 00:21:57,916 After lunch? 422 00:21:58,015 --> 00:22:01,585 Right away after lunch. 423 00:22:01,685 --> 00:22:04,488 Three-ish. 424 00:22:04,588 --> 00:22:08,191 I don't suppose you could stay on a little longer? 425 00:22:08,291 --> 00:22:09,892 I'd rather not really. 426 00:22:09,991 --> 00:22:11,861 Why? 427 00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:16,063 It's just that things are coming to a head. 428 00:22:16,164 --> 00:22:18,733 I thought it might be better for Grace if you were here. 429 00:22:18,834 --> 00:22:20,968 What do you mean coming to a head. 430 00:22:21,068 --> 00:22:25,038 Well, I suppose you heard last night. 431 00:22:25,138 --> 00:22:27,207 She's not that all the time is she? 432 00:22:27,307 --> 00:22:28,541 No. 433 00:22:28,641 --> 00:22:30,075 No. 434 00:22:30,175 --> 00:22:32,177 Better that I'm here for what? 435 00:22:35,647 --> 00:22:36,748 I'm going to leave. 436 00:22:42,587 --> 00:22:43,253 I'm sorry. 437 00:22:43,353 --> 00:22:44,488 I can't make Grace happy. 438 00:22:44,588 --> 00:22:46,456 I've tried, but I'm the wrong person. 439 00:22:49,358 --> 00:22:55,463 Also, ridiculous as it may sound, I've fallen in love. 440 00:22:55,563 --> 00:22:56,331 What? 441 00:22:56,431 --> 00:22:59,334 It's not what I expected either. 442 00:22:59,434 --> 00:23:01,936 Jesus, Dad, how did this happen? 443 00:23:02,035 --> 00:23:05,339 Her name's Angela. 444 00:23:05,439 --> 00:23:09,709 She's the mother of a boy at school. 445 00:23:09,809 --> 00:23:12,545 He's been having problems, and I've been helping him. 446 00:23:12,645 --> 00:23:14,446 Oh, God. 447 00:23:14,546 --> 00:23:16,815 Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. 448 00:23:16,915 --> 00:23:19,083 Only what about Mom? 449 00:23:19,183 --> 00:23:22,186 She'll be better off without me. 450 00:23:22,286 --> 00:23:25,188 I don't give her what she wants. 451 00:23:25,288 --> 00:23:28,491 I didn't realize until I got to know Angela. 452 00:23:28,591 --> 00:23:31,226 With Angela, it's easy. 453 00:23:31,326 --> 00:23:33,862 The way I am seems to suit her. 454 00:23:33,962 --> 00:23:39,233 With Grace, everything I do is wrong. 455 00:23:39,333 --> 00:23:43,670 I'm nervous and clumsy. 456 00:23:43,771 --> 00:23:44,704 I annoy her. 457 00:23:47,306 --> 00:23:49,074 Does she know anything? 458 00:23:49,174 --> 00:23:50,809 Not about Angela, no. 459 00:23:55,113 --> 00:23:57,215 So it'll come out of nowhere. 460 00:23:57,315 --> 00:23:59,384 Well, hardly nowhere. 461 00:24:02,319 --> 00:24:03,954 It's been getting worse and worse. 462 00:24:04,053 --> 00:24:06,289 Several times, she's talked about separation. 463 00:24:06,389 --> 00:24:07,423 She doesn't mean it. 464 00:24:07,523 --> 00:24:09,158 Then why does she say it. 465 00:24:09,258 --> 00:24:11,827 She feels there's something not real about her marriage. 466 00:24:11,928 --> 00:24:13,094 Well, you she could be right. 467 00:24:13,194 --> 00:24:14,729 But I don't think she wants to be right. 468 00:24:23,437 --> 00:24:26,806 That's why I was hoping you could stay on a bit longer. 469 00:24:39,116 --> 00:24:42,687 Why didn't you change your mind? 470 00:24:42,787 --> 00:24:43,587 I'm sorry. 471 00:24:43,687 --> 00:24:44,922 It's all gone too far. 472 00:24:45,022 --> 00:24:46,990 Oh, God. 473 00:24:47,089 --> 00:24:49,826 She'll still have you. 474 00:24:49,926 --> 00:24:52,127 Sorry. 475 00:24:52,227 --> 00:24:56,130 I don't know that I can do this. 476 00:24:56,230 --> 00:25:00,902 Well, I have to tell her soon. 477 00:25:01,002 --> 00:25:03,470 What will you do, move out? 478 00:25:03,570 --> 00:25:04,338 Yes. 479 00:25:04,438 --> 00:25:05,839 When? 480 00:25:05,939 --> 00:25:09,809 Well, the plan was soon, very soon. 481 00:25:09,909 --> 00:25:11,711 Well, you don't mean today. 482 00:25:11,811 --> 00:25:14,914 Angela felt why drag it out. 483 00:25:15,014 --> 00:25:16,648 No, you can't. 484 00:25:16,748 --> 00:25:19,149 You have to break it to her more gently. 485 00:25:19,249 --> 00:25:20,651 How do I do that? 486 00:25:23,887 --> 00:25:26,189 She'll be back from church soon and I'm going to tell her 487 00:25:26,289 --> 00:25:31,259 and then I'm going to leave. 488 00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:35,430 You can be with her for a while and still be away by 4:00. 489 00:25:35,530 --> 00:25:40,267 I know the trains can be very slow on Sunday. 490 00:25:40,368 --> 00:25:42,469 This is why you asked me to come down. 491 00:25:48,775 --> 00:25:50,776 Have you packed a bag? 492 00:25:50,876 --> 00:25:52,745 Just the basics. 493 00:25:52,845 --> 00:25:54,379 So it's already happened. 494 00:26:04,321 --> 00:26:05,455 How long will it take? 495 00:26:05,555 --> 00:26:08,959 I don't want to be here when you do it. 496 00:26:09,059 --> 00:26:13,062 Give me half an hour. 497 00:26:13,161 --> 00:26:15,131 Half an hour then. 498 00:26:15,230 --> 00:26:16,197 Right. 499 00:27:03,037 --> 00:27:05,505 Ha, Jamie not up? 500 00:27:05,605 --> 00:27:07,974 He's gone out for a walk. 501 00:27:08,075 --> 00:27:10,177 A walk by himself. 502 00:27:10,276 --> 00:27:13,311 He never goes for a walk by himself. 503 00:27:13,411 --> 00:27:15,181 A cup of tea? 504 00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:16,047 Toast? 505 00:27:16,148 --> 00:27:16,848 Please. 506 00:27:20,085 --> 00:27:24,387 You know how we say in the mass, Lord have mercy on us. 507 00:27:24,487 --> 00:27:25,789 I found myself counting. 508 00:27:25,889 --> 00:27:29,125 We asked for mercy 17 times. 509 00:27:29,224 --> 00:27:33,695 Nine times in the curia alone, of course, three times in agnus 510 00:27:33,795 --> 00:27:37,398 dei, and it kept popping up everywhere else. 511 00:27:37,498 --> 00:27:40,768 I think it may have a sort of hypnotic effect, 512 00:27:40,868 --> 00:27:42,136 all that asking for mercy. 513 00:27:42,235 --> 00:27:44,704 After a while, it begins to strike you maybe you need it. 514 00:27:53,145 --> 00:27:55,180 I know I go for you sometimes. 515 00:27:55,279 --> 00:27:58,249 I'll try to stop. 516 00:27:58,349 --> 00:28:00,283 Really all I want is reassurance. 517 00:28:00,383 --> 00:28:02,853 All right. 518 00:28:02,954 --> 00:28:05,489 Hmm? 519 00:28:05,589 --> 00:28:08,290 Just to know that we're going through this thing together. 520 00:28:22,669 --> 00:28:25,705 It's not really working is it? 521 00:28:28,808 --> 00:28:31,043 What did you say? 522 00:28:31,144 --> 00:28:32,711 It's not really working. 523 00:28:32,811 --> 00:28:34,713 Thank God. 524 00:28:34,813 --> 00:28:36,347 You do see it. 525 00:28:36,447 --> 00:28:38,549 What's happened to us? 526 00:28:38,649 --> 00:28:42,352 I think what you said is true. 527 00:28:42,452 --> 00:28:43,586 I've been walking away. 528 00:28:43,686 --> 00:28:45,688 I've been avoiding things. 529 00:28:45,789 --> 00:28:47,357 Thank God. 530 00:28:47,457 --> 00:28:48,958 You're saying it at last. 531 00:28:49,058 --> 00:28:53,762 I suppose I felt I can't give you what you want, 532 00:28:53,862 --> 00:28:58,032 so I felt like I'm not very useful person really, 533 00:28:58,133 --> 00:28:59,299 for you at least. 534 00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:02,937 I seem to annoy you and do things wrong. 535 00:29:03,037 --> 00:29:06,773 That makes me feel, well, not much good really. 536 00:29:06,873 --> 00:29:09,942 So I try not to talk about it, which only makes it worse. 537 00:29:10,042 --> 00:29:11,744 Thank God. 538 00:29:11,844 --> 00:29:13,913 You understand. 539 00:29:14,013 --> 00:29:15,047 I've been praying for this. 540 00:29:17,615 --> 00:29:21,618 I think the truth we're different kinds of people. 541 00:29:21,718 --> 00:29:23,821 It may just be that we don't work very well together. 542 00:29:23,921 --> 00:29:25,155 But we can. 543 00:29:25,255 --> 00:29:27,790 If we understand each other and are real with each other 544 00:29:27,890 --> 00:29:28,991 and if you... 545 00:29:29,091 --> 00:29:31,294 if we have the will to make it work, it'll work. 546 00:29:31,393 --> 00:29:32,360 I know it. 547 00:29:32,460 --> 00:29:34,197 I'm not sure I have that will. 548 00:29:34,297 --> 00:29:35,897 Well, you have to. 549 00:29:35,997 --> 00:29:41,035 Marriages only work because both people want them to work. 550 00:29:41,135 --> 00:29:42,770 I'm not sure I want that. 551 00:29:42,870 --> 00:29:45,272 You're not sure you want our marriage to work? 552 00:29:45,371 --> 00:29:47,073 Edward, listen to me. 553 00:29:47,173 --> 00:29:48,507 This is terribly important. 554 00:29:48,608 --> 00:29:51,410 You must will or marriage, or it'll die. 555 00:29:51,510 --> 00:29:52,644 There's no in between. 556 00:29:52,744 --> 00:29:55,346 It's either alive, or it's dead. 557 00:29:55,446 --> 00:29:58,015 What if it's dead? 558 00:29:58,116 --> 00:29:59,750 Then we go our separate ways. 559 00:29:59,851 --> 00:30:02,652 No one can live in a dead marriage. 560 00:30:02,752 --> 00:30:07,023 Maybe that's what we should do, go our separate ways. 561 00:30:07,123 --> 00:30:09,092 But it isn't dead. 562 00:30:09,192 --> 00:30:11,994 Do you think it's dead? 563 00:30:12,094 --> 00:30:13,128 Well, I don't. 564 00:30:13,229 --> 00:30:15,363 It's not dead for me. 565 00:30:15,463 --> 00:30:16,198 I'm your wife. 566 00:30:16,298 --> 00:30:17,365 You're my husband. 567 00:30:17,465 --> 00:30:18,365 You can say anything you want to me, 568 00:30:18,465 --> 00:30:19,633 anything in the whole world. 569 00:30:26,974 --> 00:30:30,743 I want to leave. 570 00:30:30,843 --> 00:30:31,744 Leave? 571 00:30:31,844 --> 00:30:32,811 Yes. 572 00:30:32,912 --> 00:30:33,979 Leave to go where? 573 00:30:39,617 --> 00:30:43,120 There's someone else. 574 00:30:43,220 --> 00:30:45,421 Someone else? 575 00:30:45,521 --> 00:30:46,556 I'm sorry. 576 00:30:51,294 --> 00:30:53,363 How can there be some... someone else? 577 00:30:53,462 --> 00:30:55,197 What someone else? 578 00:30:55,297 --> 00:30:57,999 A parent at school. 579 00:30:58,099 --> 00:30:59,901 You don't know... 580 00:31:00,001 --> 00:31:01,401 What parent at school? 581 00:31:04,305 --> 00:31:07,374 Her name's Angela Walker. 582 00:31:07,473 --> 00:31:08,607 I didn't mean it to happen. 583 00:31:08,707 --> 00:31:12,410 It was an accident, but it's happened. 584 00:31:12,511 --> 00:31:14,479 An accident? 585 00:31:14,579 --> 00:31:15,480 How was it an accident? 586 00:31:17,782 --> 00:31:21,052 I met her to talk over her son's problems. 587 00:31:23,754 --> 00:31:25,588 She told me about the situation at home 588 00:31:25,688 --> 00:31:30,593 and that the boy's father left a year or so ago. 589 00:31:30,693 --> 00:31:34,196 She became quite emotional. 590 00:31:34,297 --> 00:31:43,103 And I said what I could, and that's how we became close. 591 00:31:43,203 --> 00:31:44,939 Became close? 592 00:31:45,039 --> 00:31:46,105 Yes. 593 00:31:46,206 --> 00:31:47,040 How close? 594 00:31:49,842 --> 00:31:51,244 No. 595 00:31:51,344 --> 00:31:53,612 I don't want to hear it. 596 00:31:53,712 --> 00:31:57,015 When did this accident happen? 597 00:31:57,115 --> 00:31:58,950 About a year ago. 598 00:31:59,050 --> 00:32:00,184 A year ago? 599 00:32:02,686 --> 00:32:04,188 And you went on just the same? 600 00:32:07,824 --> 00:32:09,758 I should've told you before. 601 00:32:09,858 --> 00:32:13,996 But it's not an accident. 602 00:32:14,096 --> 00:32:16,365 You're doing it. 603 00:32:16,464 --> 00:32:19,067 You don't have to do it. 604 00:32:19,167 --> 00:32:20,201 You can stop doing it. 605 00:32:20,301 --> 00:32:21,702 I'm sorry. 606 00:32:21,802 --> 00:32:23,103 I can't. 607 00:32:23,203 --> 00:32:26,039 You're not free? 608 00:32:26,139 --> 00:32:27,473 Don't you realize that? 609 00:32:30,543 --> 00:32:32,510 This woman may have lost her husband, 610 00:32:32,610 --> 00:32:36,047 but that doesn't give her the right to take mine. 611 00:32:36,147 --> 00:32:37,382 Edward, this is ridiculous. 612 00:32:37,481 --> 00:32:38,782 You must see that. 613 00:32:38,882 --> 00:32:41,251 Or are you just doing this to give me a fright, 614 00:32:41,353 --> 00:32:43,854 make me behave better? 615 00:32:43,954 --> 00:32:44,821 No. 616 00:32:47,557 --> 00:32:49,792 Does Jamie know? 617 00:32:49,892 --> 00:32:50,960 Some of it. 618 00:32:51,060 --> 00:32:52,161 I told him at breakfast. 619 00:32:52,261 --> 00:32:54,429 You told Jamie? 620 00:32:54,529 --> 00:32:57,332 I know this is all a shock. 621 00:32:57,432 --> 00:33:01,035 But I do truly believe you'll come to see it's for the best. 622 00:33:01,135 --> 00:33:03,536 For the best? 623 00:33:03,636 --> 00:33:05,505 I'm no good for you, Grace. 624 00:33:05,605 --> 00:33:08,208 I didn't give you what you want. 625 00:33:08,308 --> 00:33:12,745 You don't give me what I want because you're not even trying. 626 00:33:12,845 --> 00:33:14,679 You found a way to sneak out of it. 627 00:33:14,779 --> 00:33:16,080 Well, I won't let you. 628 00:33:16,181 --> 00:33:18,783 I'm sorry. 629 00:33:18,883 --> 00:33:20,451 I've made up... I've made up my mind. 630 00:33:20,550 --> 00:33:23,553 Well, you'll have to unmake it, won't you? 631 00:33:23,653 --> 00:33:25,756 This decision involves me. 632 00:33:25,856 --> 00:33:27,190 You have to consult me. 633 00:33:27,290 --> 00:33:28,291 Don't do this, Grace. 634 00:33:28,392 --> 00:33:29,558 It'll only make it worse. 635 00:33:29,658 --> 00:33:32,495 You can't just walk away after 29 years. 636 00:33:32,594 --> 00:33:33,496 You have to try. 637 00:33:33,628 --> 00:33:36,831 I have tried for 29 years. 638 00:33:36,931 --> 00:33:38,466 No. 639 00:33:38,565 --> 00:33:39,467 Don't say that. 640 00:33:39,566 --> 00:33:40,701 You don't mean that. 641 00:33:40,801 --> 00:33:43,536 No. 642 00:33:43,636 --> 00:33:44,837 No, I don't mean that. 643 00:33:44,938 --> 00:33:49,742 But you know how it's been. 644 00:33:49,842 --> 00:34:00,951 I... look, Edward, we had Tunbridge. 645 00:34:04,155 --> 00:34:10,659 We... when Jamie was little, those years at Tunbridge, 646 00:34:10,759 --> 00:34:12,661 they were good years. 647 00:34:12,761 --> 00:34:14,396 You mustn't take it all. 648 00:34:14,496 --> 00:34:15,297 You mustn't. 649 00:34:15,397 --> 00:34:17,098 You'll kill me. 650 00:34:17,198 --> 00:34:21,135 When Jamie was little, they were good years. 651 00:34:47,290 --> 00:34:48,925 Come here, darling. 652 00:34:54,062 --> 00:34:54,663 Oh. 653 00:35:00,434 --> 00:35:03,003 All right. 654 00:35:03,104 --> 00:35:04,338 You win. 655 00:35:04,438 --> 00:35:06,272 I'm sorry. 656 00:35:06,372 --> 00:35:08,475 I won't go for you ever again. 657 00:35:08,575 --> 00:35:09,375 Just don't leave. 658 00:35:09,476 --> 00:35:10,510 You know it won't work. 659 00:35:10,609 --> 00:35:11,377 Yes, it will. 660 00:35:11,478 --> 00:35:12,211 We'll make it work. 661 00:35:12,311 --> 00:35:13,512 Grace... 662 00:35:13,644 --> 00:35:15,680 I just want a chance to put things right. 663 00:35:15,780 --> 00:35:17,583 That's fair, isn't it? 664 00:35:17,682 --> 00:35:20,017 You owe me that at least. 665 00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:20,784 Sit down. 666 00:35:20,884 --> 00:35:23,186 Finish your breakfast. 667 00:35:23,286 --> 00:35:24,321 I have finished. 668 00:36:04,588 --> 00:36:06,557 It's me. 669 00:36:06,656 --> 00:36:09,658 I'm on my way. 670 00:36:09,758 --> 00:36:11,594 He won't leave, will he? 671 00:36:11,693 --> 00:36:13,495 He's just doing this to frighten me. 672 00:36:13,595 --> 00:36:15,030 I think... I think he'll leave. 673 00:36:15,130 --> 00:36:17,765 Can you tell me something else please? 674 00:36:17,865 --> 00:36:19,267 I don't know what to say. 675 00:36:19,367 --> 00:36:20,901 Say it won't happen. 676 00:36:21,002 --> 00:36:23,638 Say there's something I can do. 677 00:36:23,737 --> 00:36:26,705 Darling boy, tell me what it is I'm to do 678 00:36:26,805 --> 00:36:27,773 and I'll do it for you. 679 00:36:27,873 --> 00:36:29,476 It's all right. 680 00:36:29,576 --> 00:36:31,210 I'll be all right in a minute. 681 00:40:22,803 --> 00:40:26,473 That forecast much of the country, plenty of sunshine 682 00:40:26,573 --> 00:40:27,173 around... 683 00:40:31,677 --> 00:40:36,815 Lush patchworks of green, mesmerizing shades 684 00:40:36,914 --> 00:40:44,688 of blue, hills, dales, rivers, and streams. 685 00:40:44,788 --> 00:40:46,922 Our countryside is rich in landscapes 686 00:40:47,022 --> 00:40:48,625 just waiting to be explored. 687 00:42:29,642 --> 00:42:32,110 Very unusual, Jamie. 688 00:42:32,211 --> 00:42:34,179 That's rather precipitous. 689 00:42:34,279 --> 00:42:35,781 Work up an amor for Jamie? 690 00:42:35,881 --> 00:42:36,447 Cheers. 691 00:42:36,548 --> 00:42:37,248 Cheers. 692 00:42:41,251 --> 00:42:43,888 So how are things with Kelly? 693 00:42:43,987 --> 00:42:45,589 Kylie. 694 00:42:45,689 --> 00:42:46,923 Not good. 695 00:42:47,022 --> 00:42:49,726 She's acting kind of elusive. 696 00:42:49,826 --> 00:42:51,427 Elusive? 697 00:42:51,527 --> 00:42:52,228 That's not good. 698 00:42:52,328 --> 00:42:53,261 I don't know what it means. 699 00:42:53,362 --> 00:42:55,163 It means she never shows up. 700 00:42:55,263 --> 00:42:56,698 I mean it, Jamie, you deserve better. 701 00:42:56,798 --> 00:42:57,765 I wish. 702 00:42:57,866 --> 00:42:59,434 Can I give you a tip? 703 00:42:59,534 --> 00:43:00,768 Sure. 704 00:43:00,869 --> 00:43:05,171 OK, sometimes you can come across as like unreachable, 705 00:43:05,271 --> 00:43:06,472 like your clothes. 706 00:43:06,573 --> 00:43:07,306 What's that about? 707 00:43:07,406 --> 00:43:08,508 I'm tired. 708 00:43:08,608 --> 00:43:09,876 This thing with my mom. 709 00:43:09,976 --> 00:43:13,278 She's having a hard time and I'm going home every weekend. 710 00:43:13,378 --> 00:43:16,848 My dad walked out on my mom, I'd kill him. 711 00:43:16,948 --> 00:43:18,115 I hadn't thought of that. 712 00:43:18,215 --> 00:43:19,751 Look, what I'm saying about Kelly... 713 00:43:19,851 --> 00:43:20,518 Kylie... 714 00:43:20,618 --> 00:43:22,987 Is... Kylie... 715 00:43:23,086 --> 00:43:27,657 maybe... maybe you just went there for her enough. 716 00:43:40,334 --> 00:43:42,670 When did you last see her? 717 00:43:42,770 --> 00:43:43,603 Sunday. 718 00:43:43,703 --> 00:43:44,838 How was she? 719 00:43:44,939 --> 00:43:46,105 Not good. 720 00:43:46,206 --> 00:43:48,274 Does she know you're meeting me? 721 00:43:48,374 --> 00:43:50,142 No, but she wanted me to see you. 722 00:43:50,242 --> 00:43:51,377 She has a message for you. 723 00:43:51,477 --> 00:43:52,711 Oh? 724 00:43:52,811 --> 00:43:56,714 I am to say you owe it to her to give her another chance. 725 00:43:56,814 --> 00:43:58,983 You did this out of the blue without consulting her or 726 00:43:59,082 --> 00:44:01,218 warning her, and there it is. 727 00:44:01,318 --> 00:44:01,886 I'm sure you know. 728 00:44:01,986 --> 00:44:03,420 BS. 729 00:44:03,520 --> 00:44:05,989 She wants you to go back for a trial period, 730 00:44:06,088 --> 00:44:07,323 and if it doesn't work out... 731 00:44:07,423 --> 00:44:07,824 I can't. 732 00:44:07,925 --> 00:44:08,691 I've gone. 733 00:44:08,791 --> 00:44:10,226 I'm not coming back. 734 00:44:10,326 --> 00:44:14,496 I'll do anything I can to help, but I'm not coming back. 735 00:44:14,596 --> 00:44:15,597 I'm sorry. 736 00:44:15,697 --> 00:44:16,865 Right. 737 00:44:16,965 --> 00:44:20,134 Do you want a tea or a... 738 00:44:20,234 --> 00:44:21,468 or an ice cream? 739 00:44:21,569 --> 00:44:23,202 Fine. 740 00:44:23,303 --> 00:44:25,739 I might have a Cornetto, something 741 00:44:25,839 --> 00:44:29,876 about being by the sea. 742 00:44:29,976 --> 00:44:31,276 One of them please. 743 00:44:36,715 --> 00:44:37,749 That's two pounds. 744 00:44:37,849 --> 00:44:39,283 Two pounds? 745 00:44:39,383 --> 00:44:41,919 Really? 746 00:44:42,019 --> 00:44:44,821 Thank you. 747 00:44:44,922 --> 00:44:46,923 I hardly ever use cash these days. 748 00:44:47,023 --> 00:44:47,958 Why ever not? 749 00:44:48,058 --> 00:44:49,658 It's all contactless now. 750 00:44:52,962 --> 00:44:55,129 It's all contactless now, yes. 751 00:44:55,229 --> 00:44:57,966 Well, there it is. 752 00:44:58,066 --> 00:45:00,167 Thing is I really don't know how Mom's 753 00:45:00,267 --> 00:45:02,469 going to make it through this. 754 00:45:02,569 --> 00:45:10,108 Both Angela and I think the less contact I have, 755 00:45:10,209 --> 00:45:14,080 the sooner she'll move on. 756 00:45:14,179 --> 00:45:16,948 Yes, well, of course, that doesn't mean I won't 757 00:45:17,048 --> 00:45:18,550 do everything I can to help. 758 00:45:18,650 --> 00:45:22,186 That's the part I really don't understand. 759 00:45:22,286 --> 00:45:26,957 You seem to care for her so much and now not. 760 00:45:27,057 --> 00:45:30,760 Yes, it's not easy to explain. 761 00:45:34,196 --> 00:45:35,897 There was a time, wasn't there? 762 00:45:35,998 --> 00:45:38,766 Yes, yes, of course. 763 00:45:38,866 --> 00:45:42,135 I always thought you were rather proud of her. 764 00:45:42,235 --> 00:45:47,907 She is remarkable in her way. 765 00:45:48,008 --> 00:45:51,610 I suppose I was half dazzled by her in the beginning. 766 00:45:51,710 --> 00:45:53,512 She was quite dazzling. 767 00:45:53,612 --> 00:45:58,182 You looked happy in all the old photographs. 768 00:45:58,282 --> 00:46:01,551 You were happy. 769 00:46:01,652 --> 00:46:06,222 I suppose we were and then not. 770 00:46:08,791 --> 00:46:11,894 You know what she calls my Wiki-ing? 771 00:46:11,994 --> 00:46:13,428 Yes. 772 00:46:13,528 --> 00:46:16,031 If you make a mistake in a Wikipedia article, 773 00:46:16,132 --> 00:46:18,700 you can do what they call reverse it. 774 00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:25,605 You just click history, and then you just click undo. 775 00:46:25,705 --> 00:46:28,341 Dad. 776 00:46:28,441 --> 00:46:31,144 By the way, I should have said I've changed my phone number. 777 00:46:31,243 --> 00:46:32,644 I had to. 778 00:46:32,744 --> 00:46:33,879 Is she calling? 779 00:46:33,979 --> 00:46:35,212 Every day. 780 00:46:35,313 --> 00:46:36,515 Saying what? 781 00:46:36,615 --> 00:46:37,082 Nothing. 782 00:46:37,181 --> 00:46:38,416 She never spoke. 783 00:46:38,516 --> 00:46:40,118 I recognize the sound of her breathing. 784 00:46:40,217 --> 00:46:41,686 You recognize... 785 00:46:46,456 --> 00:46:48,725 I'll give you the new number if you... 786 00:46:48,825 --> 00:46:50,492 Just text me, Dad. 787 00:46:50,592 --> 00:46:52,261 OK. 788 00:46:52,361 --> 00:46:53,929 You won't... 789 00:46:54,029 --> 00:46:55,463 No. 790 00:46:55,563 --> 00:46:56,464 Fine. 791 00:46:59,834 --> 00:47:01,135 I should be getting... 792 00:47:01,234 --> 00:47:02,170 going. 793 00:47:02,269 --> 00:47:04,938 She'll be waiting for me so... 794 00:47:05,038 --> 00:47:08,441 Well then keep in touch. 795 00:47:37,766 --> 00:47:38,666 Mom? 796 00:47:42,169 --> 00:47:44,838 How long have you been sitting here? 797 00:47:44,939 --> 00:47:46,306 I have no idea. 798 00:47:51,944 --> 00:47:53,746 Just like Edward. 799 00:47:53,846 --> 00:47:54,780 What? 800 00:47:54,880 --> 00:47:57,448 Making tea so you don't have to talk. 801 00:47:57,548 --> 00:48:01,384 We get our tea, and then we talk. 802 00:48:01,485 --> 00:48:02,819 You've seen him. 803 00:48:05,355 --> 00:48:06,757 Alone or with her? 804 00:48:09,892 --> 00:48:11,660 Just him. 805 00:48:11,761 --> 00:48:12,862 I never met her. 806 00:48:12,962 --> 00:48:14,262 I'd have told you. 807 00:48:14,362 --> 00:48:16,631 Did you give him my message? 808 00:48:16,731 --> 00:48:18,432 Yes. 809 00:48:18,533 --> 00:48:19,566 Says he can't come back. 810 00:48:19,666 --> 00:48:20,034 Won't. 811 00:48:30,442 --> 00:48:32,145 What's this? 812 00:48:32,245 --> 00:48:34,946 What does it look like? 813 00:48:35,046 --> 00:48:36,413 And in the knife drawer. 814 00:48:36,515 --> 00:48:39,316 And on the phone message pad. 815 00:48:39,416 --> 00:48:42,787 And... and in the pocket of his coat. 816 00:48:42,887 --> 00:48:44,521 What for? 817 00:48:44,621 --> 00:48:49,726 I don't know I suppose because while I was writing 818 00:48:49,826 --> 00:48:51,794 them and hiding them in all the places 819 00:48:51,894 --> 00:48:54,630 where he might find them, it made me 820 00:48:54,730 --> 00:48:56,664 think it really could happen. 821 00:49:02,536 --> 00:49:03,970 He really would come back. 822 00:49:17,048 --> 00:49:25,789 And then when he found them, he couldn't go away again. 823 00:49:34,563 --> 00:49:36,097 So he told you he won't. 824 00:49:36,198 --> 00:49:37,899 Yes. 825 00:49:37,999 --> 00:49:39,967 What did you say to that? 826 00:49:40,067 --> 00:49:42,603 Well, what could I say? 827 00:49:42,703 --> 00:49:44,470 You could say you bastard, you 828 00:49:44,571 --> 00:49:46,140 murderer, you home wrecker. 829 00:49:46,240 --> 00:49:46,873 Well, I didn't. 830 00:49:46,973 --> 00:49:49,008 Why not? 831 00:49:49,108 --> 00:49:51,410 Do you think he's entitled to do what he's doing? 832 00:49:51,510 --> 00:49:53,278 That's not for me to judge. 833 00:49:53,378 --> 00:49:54,813 Why not? 834 00:49:54,913 --> 00:49:57,582 If you saw a man beating a woman to death in the street, 835 00:49:57,682 --> 00:50:00,450 would you walk on by, say that's not for me to judge? 836 00:50:00,551 --> 00:50:01,418 That's not how it is. 837 00:50:01,518 --> 00:50:03,520 This is a murder, Jamie. 838 00:50:03,620 --> 00:50:07,290 Just because there's no blood, don't think it's not a murder. 839 00:50:07,389 --> 00:50:09,525 He's murdering a marriage. 840 00:50:09,625 --> 00:50:12,628 Marriages don't bleed, but it's still murder. 841 00:50:12,728 --> 00:50:14,495 I don't think it helps to talk like that. 842 00:50:14,596 --> 00:50:18,365 Tell me how to talk so it does help. 843 00:50:18,465 --> 00:50:20,134 Marriages break down. 844 00:50:20,235 --> 00:50:21,368 It happens all the time. 845 00:50:21,468 --> 00:50:22,436 Nobody wants it to happen but it does, 846 00:50:22,536 --> 00:50:23,470 and we have to live with it. 847 00:50:23,570 --> 00:50:25,371 Oh, what sort of talk is that? 848 00:50:25,471 --> 00:50:27,740 Children are starving to death all the time, 849 00:50:27,840 --> 00:50:29,208 but it doesn't make it all right. 850 00:50:29,308 --> 00:50:30,109 But we live with it. 851 00:50:30,209 --> 00:50:31,911 Not if it was my child. 852 00:50:32,011 --> 00:50:34,846 Not if it was you. 853 00:50:34,946 --> 00:50:37,481 If it was you starving to death, I'd let 854 00:50:37,581 --> 00:50:39,483 myself die first to save you. 855 00:50:39,583 --> 00:50:40,885 Do you doubt that? 856 00:50:40,985 --> 00:50:42,253 No. 857 00:50:42,353 --> 00:50:46,990 Well, this is my marriage, and I'll do anything to save it. 858 00:50:47,090 --> 00:50:48,524 And I'm asking you to help me. 859 00:50:52,661 --> 00:50:53,495 It's what he does. 860 00:50:53,595 --> 00:50:55,297 He won't look at me. 861 00:50:55,396 --> 00:50:57,465 I'm not him, Mom, all right. 862 00:50:57,565 --> 00:51:02,336 Well, you're walking away just like he did. 863 00:51:02,435 --> 00:51:05,505 He actually walked away. 864 00:51:05,605 --> 00:51:09,742 Trot, trot, trot down the road. 865 00:51:09,842 --> 00:51:11,944 Stupid suitcase. 866 00:51:12,044 --> 00:51:13,411 Have you got a suitcase? 867 00:51:13,511 --> 00:51:14,679 I'm here, aren't I? 868 00:51:14,779 --> 00:51:17,949 But you want to walk away. 869 00:51:18,049 --> 00:51:19,918 You do, don't you? 870 00:51:20,018 --> 00:51:20,919 I can't. 871 00:51:21,019 --> 00:51:22,519 Why not? 872 00:51:22,619 --> 00:51:26,123 'Case something happens to me, you feel guilty? 873 00:51:26,223 --> 00:51:27,590 Nothing's going to happen to me. 874 00:51:27,690 --> 00:51:29,725 That's what I can't bear. 875 00:51:29,825 --> 00:51:32,427 When you're alone, things stop happening. 876 00:51:32,527 --> 00:51:34,230 That's because you stay in. 877 00:51:34,330 --> 00:51:35,297 I wish you wouldn't. 878 00:51:35,398 --> 00:51:37,598 I should go out more, should I? 879 00:51:37,698 --> 00:51:39,500 Join a book group. 880 00:51:39,600 --> 00:51:41,369 It beats sitting on the stairs. 881 00:51:41,468 --> 00:51:42,502 What was that about? 882 00:51:42,603 --> 00:51:44,837 I was going up or coming down. 883 00:51:44,939 --> 00:51:47,073 I don't remember. 884 00:51:47,173 --> 00:51:50,076 I just thought what difference does it make. 885 00:51:50,176 --> 00:51:52,312 I might as well just stop here. 886 00:51:52,412 --> 00:51:53,845 Where you can see the door? 887 00:51:57,581 --> 00:52:00,017 Yeah, it's rather clever of you, Jamie. 888 00:52:02,920 --> 00:52:05,889 Is that why you don't go out? 889 00:52:05,989 --> 00:52:09,458 Because you think maybe he'll walk back through that door? 890 00:52:12,294 --> 00:52:13,862 He might. 891 00:52:13,963 --> 00:52:14,729 Mom. 892 00:52:21,902 --> 00:52:22,569 Come on. 893 00:52:22,669 --> 00:52:25,272 Let's get you out of here. 894 00:52:29,041 --> 00:52:32,777 He told me he's decided you can have the house. 895 00:52:32,877 --> 00:52:35,914 Oh, has he. 896 00:52:36,014 --> 00:52:38,350 I suppose he thinks that makes everything all right. 897 00:52:38,450 --> 00:52:40,517 Think he really wants to do what he can. 898 00:52:40,617 --> 00:52:43,020 So he told you I could have the house. 899 00:52:43,120 --> 00:52:43,787 Yes. 900 00:52:43,887 --> 00:52:45,356 Well, he hasn't told me. 901 00:52:45,456 --> 00:52:46,489 He wanted me to tell you. 902 00:52:46,589 --> 00:52:49,491 I don't care what he wanted. 903 00:52:49,591 --> 00:52:51,593 If he wants to make arrangements that affect me, 904 00:52:51,693 --> 00:52:53,929 he can come and talk to me himself. 905 00:52:54,029 --> 00:52:57,265 I won't have him using you as a messenger boy. 906 00:52:57,366 --> 00:53:01,202 Can't stand the way he does all this without consulting me. 907 00:53:01,302 --> 00:53:02,635 Why isn't it working? 908 00:53:02,736 --> 00:53:04,504 He's changed his number. 909 00:53:04,604 --> 00:53:06,206 He's changed his number. 910 00:53:06,306 --> 00:53:07,240 He told me. 911 00:53:07,340 --> 00:53:08,274 So he's got a new number. 912 00:53:08,375 --> 00:53:09,109 Yes. 913 00:53:09,209 --> 00:53:10,343 Have you got it? 914 00:53:10,443 --> 00:53:12,244 No. 915 00:53:12,344 --> 00:53:13,578 Don't be silly, Jamie. 916 00:53:13,678 --> 00:53:14,947 Of course, you have. 917 00:53:15,047 --> 00:53:16,514 I could always tell when you were lying. 918 00:53:16,614 --> 00:53:18,082 I can't give it to you. 919 00:53:18,182 --> 00:53:19,317 Why not? 920 00:53:19,417 --> 00:53:20,985 He asked me not to give it to you. 921 00:53:21,085 --> 00:53:22,786 Well, I ask you to give it to me. 922 00:53:22,886 --> 00:53:24,254 I'm not going to, all right. 923 00:53:24,354 --> 00:53:26,390 I don't see why you always have to get your own way. 924 00:53:26,490 --> 00:53:27,457 Get my own way? 925 00:53:27,556 --> 00:53:29,558 You think I get my own way? 926 00:53:29,658 --> 00:53:31,961 I think it'd be a bad idea to give you his number. 927 00:53:32,061 --> 00:53:34,463 Well, that's not for you to judge 928 00:53:34,562 --> 00:53:36,398 as you're so fond of saying. 929 00:53:36,498 --> 00:53:37,432 I'm grown up. 930 00:53:37,531 --> 00:53:39,100 I'm not a criminal or a lunatic. 931 00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:41,235 I wish to be able to contact my husband. 932 00:53:41,336 --> 00:53:42,870 No. 933 00:53:42,970 --> 00:53:45,239 I think you'd better go. 934 00:53:45,339 --> 00:53:46,105 Go on, leave. 935 00:53:46,206 --> 00:53:47,374 It's what you want. 936 00:53:47,474 --> 00:53:50,076 You can't help, so why don't you just go? 937 00:53:50,176 --> 00:53:51,010 You're no use to me. 938 00:53:51,110 --> 00:53:52,644 You've taken his side. 939 00:53:52,744 --> 00:53:54,479 You've left me already just like he has. 940 00:53:54,579 --> 00:53:56,647 Well, if I'm to be alone, I'd rather 941 00:53:56,747 --> 00:53:59,250 be alone and not have you dangling about pitying me 942 00:53:59,351 --> 00:54:00,184 and patronizing me. 943 00:54:00,284 --> 00:54:01,052 Go on leave. 944 00:54:01,152 --> 00:54:01,584 Why do you do this? 945 00:54:01,684 --> 00:54:02,619 Do what? 946 00:54:02,719 --> 00:54:03,686 I've not done anything. 947 00:54:03,787 --> 00:54:04,554 I've not left him. 948 00:54:04,654 --> 00:54:05,588 He's left me. 949 00:54:05,688 --> 00:54:06,556 Go and tell him not to do this. 950 00:54:06,656 --> 00:54:07,589 I can't bring him back. 951 00:54:07,689 --> 00:54:09,325 You don't know that. 952 00:54:09,426 --> 00:54:11,394 Have you tried? 953 00:54:11,494 --> 00:54:12,828 You go on seeing him. 954 00:54:12,928 --> 00:54:14,562 That means you let him think he has your approval. 955 00:54:14,662 --> 00:54:15,863 Mom, he's in love! 956 00:56:03,053 --> 00:56:05,889 What you need is a sugar high. 957 00:56:14,296 --> 00:56:16,664 There, life flooding back? 958 00:56:16,764 --> 00:56:19,600 I should feed one of these to my mom. 959 00:56:19,699 --> 00:56:22,969 She still in a bad way? 960 00:56:23,069 --> 00:56:26,906 It's bad what your dad did. 961 00:56:27,007 --> 00:56:29,074 Oh, he... he wasn't happy. 962 00:56:29,175 --> 00:56:30,544 I knew that. 963 00:56:30,644 --> 00:56:32,578 They must have loved each other once? 964 00:56:32,677 --> 00:56:34,746 Yeah, way back. 965 00:56:37,649 --> 00:56:43,153 We used... we used to do this thing when I was little where 966 00:56:43,253 --> 00:56:46,923 we'd stand in a line, and I'd be in the middle 967 00:56:47,023 --> 00:56:51,960 and then my mom would hold one my dad would hold the other... 968 00:56:52,060 --> 00:56:54,029 and they'd swing me between them. 969 00:56:58,466 --> 00:57:02,002 All moms and dads do it. 970 00:57:02,102 --> 00:57:06,940 Their kids, they just swing... swing me along between them. 971 00:57:07,040 --> 00:57:07,607 Sorry. 972 00:57:07,706 --> 00:57:09,275 Jamie. 973 00:57:09,375 --> 00:57:10,310 You know me. 974 00:57:10,410 --> 00:57:11,644 If I cry, I'm crying for myself. 975 00:57:11,743 --> 00:57:13,111 I just didn't care enough about anyone else. 976 00:57:13,212 --> 00:57:14,413 That's not true. 977 00:57:14,513 --> 00:57:16,047 You got me at Krispy Kreme. 978 00:57:16,148 --> 00:57:17,815 So what's up? 979 00:57:17,915 --> 00:57:19,350 Is this about me? 980 00:57:19,450 --> 00:57:20,551 I'm not the one who's crying. 981 00:57:20,651 --> 00:57:22,752 I'm not the one who's been left. 982 00:57:22,852 --> 00:57:23,787 Aren't you? 983 00:57:26,690 --> 00:57:28,592 OK, OK. 984 00:57:28,692 --> 00:57:31,727 Still seeing your mom every weekend? 985 00:57:31,827 --> 00:57:33,662 Until she can cope on her own. 986 00:57:33,761 --> 00:57:36,764 When do you stop going? 987 00:57:36,864 --> 00:57:38,466 Not so often anyway. 988 00:57:38,566 --> 00:57:42,202 How is she going to feel then? 989 00:57:42,302 --> 00:57:44,804 Not great. 990 00:57:44,904 --> 00:57:47,306 How are you going to feel then? 991 00:57:47,407 --> 00:57:49,141 Me? 992 00:57:49,242 --> 00:57:51,010 Jess thinks you're still holding on. 993 00:57:55,113 --> 00:57:55,981 Am I? 994 00:58:34,045 --> 00:58:38,216 It's some papers I'm supposed to sign. 995 00:58:38,316 --> 00:58:39,684 I don't know what. 996 00:58:39,783 --> 00:58:42,819 Jamie, I'm not going to do it. 997 00:58:45,489 --> 00:58:48,057 No... he can ask me himself. 998 00:58:48,157 --> 00:58:52,628 He can come here, and we'll sign together. 999 00:58:52,728 --> 00:58:54,630 Yes, I'm coping. 1000 00:58:54,730 --> 00:58:55,430 Sunday then. 1001 00:59:10,209 --> 00:59:14,179 30 years ago, I was standing on a platform 1002 00:59:14,279 --> 00:59:18,550 in Charing Cross Station waiting to get on a train to Tunbridge. 1003 00:59:18,650 --> 00:59:22,453 And I saw a man walking down the platform who I thought 1004 00:59:22,553 --> 00:59:23,721 was my father. 1005 00:59:23,820 --> 00:59:26,822 And I raised my arm and called, father. 1006 00:59:26,923 --> 00:59:29,359 And with my arm still in the air, 1007 00:59:29,459 --> 00:59:33,262 I remembered that my father had died four months earlier. 1008 00:59:33,362 --> 00:59:38,966 The man, a complete stranger, walked on by. 1009 00:59:39,067 --> 00:59:41,234 The train came in. 1010 00:59:41,336 --> 00:59:44,938 I got into a carriage, and the train left Charing Cross. 1011 00:59:45,038 --> 00:59:49,008 The other person in the carriage was a young woman. 1012 00:59:49,108 --> 00:59:53,746 She was looking at me as if she was sorry for me. 1013 00:59:53,845 --> 00:59:56,481 I realized I had tears on my cheeks. 1014 00:59:56,581 --> 00:59:58,949 What is it she said. 1015 00:59:59,049 --> 01:00:00,250 Oh, nothing I said. 1016 01:00:00,351 --> 01:00:03,153 I mistook a man for my father who's dead. 1017 01:00:03,253 --> 01:00:09,459 And she said you must want to see him again very much. 1018 01:00:09,559 --> 01:00:11,059 My father was a reserved man. 1019 01:00:11,159 --> 01:00:15,330 I don't remember him ever embracing me. 1020 01:00:15,430 --> 01:00:18,767 Somehow when this young woman said these words to me, 1021 01:00:18,866 --> 01:00:23,337 I knew that all my life I'd wanted his embrace 1022 01:00:23,437 --> 01:00:27,273 and that now it would never come. 1023 01:00:27,374 --> 01:00:33,078 I began to weep, continued weeping I should say. 1024 01:00:33,178 --> 01:00:35,947 And the young woman recited some lines 1025 01:00:36,047 --> 01:00:42,319 from a poem I'd never heard and never forgotten since. 1026 01:00:42,419 --> 01:00:43,855 Stay for me there. 1027 01:00:43,954 --> 01:00:48,525 I will not fail to meet thee in that hollow veil. 1028 01:00:48,625 --> 01:00:50,960 And think not much of my delay. 1029 01:00:51,060 --> 01:00:54,229 I am already on the way. 1030 01:00:54,329 --> 01:00:57,532 It's by Henri King on the death of his wife. 1031 01:01:00,167 --> 01:01:02,669 How did that young woman in the train know what I was feeling? 1032 01:01:06,139 --> 01:01:07,841 It was your mother. 1033 01:01:07,940 --> 01:01:11,243 Of course, it was Grace. 1034 01:01:11,344 --> 01:01:12,578 And I was on the wrong train. 1035 01:01:12,678 --> 01:01:13,612 It was the fast train. 1036 01:01:13,713 --> 01:01:14,946 It never stopped at my station. 1037 01:01:15,046 --> 01:01:17,148 We were halfway to Dover before I realized it. 1038 01:01:19,617 --> 01:01:25,155 The truth is I made a mistake about Grace right 1039 01:01:25,255 --> 01:01:27,323 at the beginning, and she made a mistake about me. 1040 01:01:27,424 --> 01:01:31,059 We thought we were like each other, and we weren't. 1041 01:01:31,160 --> 01:01:32,361 I didn't know it. 1042 01:01:32,461 --> 01:01:34,463 I did my best to be who she wanted me to be, 1043 01:01:34,563 --> 01:01:36,330 but I didn't know who I was myself. 1044 01:01:41,134 --> 01:01:47,908 All it took was Angela's hand on my arm, her touch. 1045 01:01:48,007 --> 01:01:49,975 It was me she touched. 1046 01:01:53,813 --> 01:02:00,718 No demands, no expectations, just love. 1047 01:02:04,588 --> 01:02:09,659 All those years ago, I got on the wrong train. 1048 01:02:16,164 --> 01:02:18,065 I've always liked your flat. 1049 01:02:18,165 --> 01:02:19,500 Does it still suit you? 1050 01:02:19,600 --> 01:02:20,634 It does the job? 1051 01:02:27,740 --> 01:02:32,144 Why do people have to have such big houses? 1052 01:02:32,244 --> 01:02:34,279 One needs so little really. 1053 01:02:40,050 --> 01:02:42,185 Mom says you want her to sign something. 1054 01:02:42,285 --> 01:02:43,220 Yes. 1055 01:02:43,320 --> 01:02:45,988 It is better to have things sorted out. 1056 01:02:46,088 --> 01:02:47,457 She wants to do it with you. 1057 01:02:47,557 --> 01:02:49,458 She says you'll sign the papers if you do it together. 1058 01:02:49,558 --> 01:02:52,728 She wants to make a scene, but I won't be drawn in, Jamie. 1059 01:02:52,828 --> 01:02:53,796 There's no point. 1060 01:02:53,896 --> 01:02:55,129 She says she'll behave herself. 1061 01:02:55,230 --> 01:02:57,832 If she wants us to sign together, 1062 01:02:57,932 --> 01:02:59,634 it had better be the solicitor's office. 1063 01:02:59,734 --> 01:03:01,001 But it's the last time. 1064 01:03:01,101 --> 01:03:06,540 Tell her if you can. 1065 01:03:06,640 --> 01:03:08,074 The last time. 1066 01:03:13,111 --> 01:03:14,613 Come on, puppy. 1067 01:03:33,328 --> 01:03:38,599 They shall grow not old as we that are left gold. 1068 01:03:38,699 --> 01:03:42,970 I shall not wear them nor the years come down. 1069 01:03:43,069 --> 01:03:47,273 After going down on the sun and in the morning, 1070 01:03:47,374 --> 01:03:48,975 we will remember them. 1071 01:03:49,074 --> 01:03:51,577 We will remember them. 1072 01:04:29,409 --> 01:04:30,877 Oh, hello, Jamie. 1073 01:04:30,977 --> 01:04:31,543 You've come. 1074 01:04:31,643 --> 01:04:32,778 Hello. 1075 01:04:32,878 --> 01:04:34,580 Who are you? 1076 01:04:34,680 --> 01:04:36,280 Isn't he adorable. 1077 01:04:36,380 --> 01:04:37,648 He's so affectionate. 1078 01:04:37,749 --> 01:04:40,851 Oh, he does me more good than all my tranquilizers. 1079 01:04:40,952 --> 01:04:41,886 What's his name? 1080 01:04:41,986 --> 01:04:43,386 Eddie. 1081 01:04:43,486 --> 01:04:44,021 Eddie. 1082 01:04:44,154 --> 01:04:45,088 Come here, Eddie. 1083 01:04:45,188 --> 01:04:46,222 Come here, boy. 1084 01:04:46,323 --> 01:04:47,924 Mother, you can't call him Eddie. 1085 01:04:48,024 --> 01:04:49,726 Why not? 1086 01:04:49,826 --> 01:04:50,927 His name is Edward. 1087 01:04:51,027 --> 01:04:53,429 Just... well, it's such a give away. 1088 01:04:53,529 --> 01:04:55,263 What does it give away? 1089 01:04:55,363 --> 01:04:56,831 Look, I'm training him. 1090 01:04:56,932 --> 01:04:58,733 Look. 1091 01:04:58,833 --> 01:05:00,935 Stay, Edward. 1092 01:05:01,035 --> 01:05:01,936 Stay. 1093 01:05:02,036 --> 01:05:02,971 Mom, it's so embarrassing. 1094 01:05:03,071 --> 01:05:05,271 Oh, good boy. 1095 01:05:05,372 --> 01:05:05,939 Why? 1096 01:05:06,039 --> 01:05:07,473 I'm not embarrassed. 1097 01:05:07,573 --> 01:05:09,675 Why should you be embarrassed? 1098 01:05:14,346 --> 01:05:16,915 Have you gone back to your anthology? 1099 01:05:17,015 --> 01:05:18,315 Oh, no. 1100 01:05:18,415 --> 01:05:20,517 I'm not doing that anymore. 1101 01:05:20,618 --> 01:05:21,352 That's a pity. 1102 01:05:21,452 --> 01:05:23,020 Thought it sounded good. 1103 01:05:23,119 --> 01:05:24,287 No, you didn't. 1104 01:05:24,387 --> 01:05:25,521 You thought it gave me something to do. 1105 01:05:25,622 --> 01:05:27,423 Well, we all need something to do. 1106 01:05:27,523 --> 01:05:30,560 There's no disgrace in that. 1107 01:05:30,660 --> 01:05:31,861 So how are you? 1108 01:05:31,961 --> 01:05:33,462 How's your love life? 1109 01:05:33,562 --> 01:05:34,396 Private. 1110 01:05:34,496 --> 01:05:39,200 Uh, so you're still on your own. 1111 01:05:39,300 --> 01:05:42,103 Lunch is going to be very basic. 1112 01:05:42,202 --> 01:05:44,105 Wonder why. 1113 01:05:44,204 --> 01:05:45,705 Why you haven't found anyone. 1114 01:05:45,805 --> 01:05:46,806 You look perfectly normal. 1115 01:05:46,906 --> 01:05:48,008 This isn't about me. 1116 01:05:48,108 --> 01:05:50,175 Yes, it is. 1117 01:05:50,275 --> 01:05:51,510 If you're no good at making people 1118 01:05:51,610 --> 01:05:53,211 love you, that's my fault, isn't it? 1119 01:05:53,312 --> 01:05:56,115 Or Edward's fault for being such a sneaking sniveling 1120 01:05:56,214 --> 01:05:57,215 excuse for a man. 1121 01:05:57,315 --> 01:05:59,117 I wish you wouldn't do that. 1122 01:05:59,216 --> 01:06:01,151 I wish he wouldn't do that. 1123 01:06:01,251 --> 01:06:03,420 Maybe I should take some of this post to Dad. 1124 01:06:03,520 --> 01:06:04,788 It looks quite important. 1125 01:06:04,888 --> 01:06:08,658 If he wants them, he can come and get them. 1126 01:06:08,758 --> 01:06:11,460 It was Remembrance Day service today. 1127 01:06:11,560 --> 01:06:14,930 It was very moving, you know. 1128 01:06:15,031 --> 01:06:18,365 I found myself thinking about the two wars and the wives 1129 01:06:18,465 --> 01:06:21,201 and the mothers waiting at home and the telegrams 1130 01:06:21,301 --> 01:06:23,937 from the war office telling them that their husbands 1131 01:06:24,038 --> 01:06:27,206 and sons were dead. 1132 01:06:27,306 --> 01:06:31,443 I thought how terrible that must have been. 1133 01:06:31,543 --> 01:06:36,948 And yet it was somehow easier to bear than losing Edward the way 1134 01:06:37,049 --> 01:06:38,150 I've lost him. 1135 01:06:38,249 --> 01:06:41,152 And then all at once I saw it. 1136 01:06:41,251 --> 01:06:42,920 This is our war. 1137 01:06:43,020 --> 01:06:46,756 This is what makes widows and orphans nowadays. 1138 01:06:46,856 --> 01:06:51,927 Only there aren't any graves or Remembrance Day services. 1139 01:06:52,027 --> 01:06:54,596 We're not allowed to mourn. 1140 01:06:54,697 --> 01:06:57,166 So you see I'm not really coping after all. 1141 01:07:01,334 --> 01:07:02,070 Come on, Eddie. 1142 01:07:02,170 --> 01:07:02,836 Come on. 1143 01:07:02,937 --> 01:07:04,104 Let's go, Eddie. 1144 01:07:04,204 --> 01:07:06,039 Come on. 1145 01:07:06,139 --> 01:07:08,507 There it is. 1146 01:07:08,607 --> 01:07:10,943 Good boy. 1147 01:07:11,043 --> 01:07:11,644 Boy. 1148 01:07:11,744 --> 01:07:12,111 Let's go. 1149 01:07:12,210 --> 01:07:12,812 Come on. 1150 01:07:16,548 --> 01:07:19,050 Mrs. Axton, Mr. Whitacomb's expecting you. 1151 01:07:19,150 --> 01:07:20,818 Has my father arrived? 1152 01:07:20,919 --> 01:07:21,819 Not yet. 1153 01:07:21,919 --> 01:07:23,219 I'll take you through. 1154 01:07:23,320 --> 01:07:24,922 We don't allow dogs in the office. 1155 01:07:25,022 --> 01:07:25,756 I'm so sorry. 1156 01:07:25,856 --> 01:07:26,789 How sorry? 1157 01:07:26,889 --> 01:07:27,557 I'm sorry? 1158 01:07:27,657 --> 01:07:28,658 My goodness. 1159 01:07:28,758 --> 01:07:29,726 You are sorry. 1160 01:07:29,826 --> 01:07:30,960 Never mind. 1161 01:07:31,060 --> 01:07:32,360 It'll pass. 1162 01:07:32,461 --> 01:07:33,862 If you'd like to follow me. 1163 01:07:38,265 --> 01:07:40,868 Thank you for coming in. 1164 01:07:40,968 --> 01:07:43,137 Oh, I'm... I'm Peter Whitacomb. 1165 01:07:43,236 --> 01:07:45,271 I'm acting for your husband in this matter. 1166 01:07:45,371 --> 01:07:48,208 Mr. Axton wishes everything to be done properly. 1167 01:07:48,307 --> 01:07:49,508 Do take a seat. 1168 01:07:49,608 --> 01:07:51,310 You may be able to do everything legally, 1169 01:07:51,410 --> 01:07:53,045 but I don't see how you can do it properly. 1170 01:07:53,145 --> 01:07:54,646 Mom, you promised. 1171 01:07:54,747 --> 01:07:55,413 All right. 1172 01:07:55,513 --> 01:07:57,315 I'll behave myself. 1173 01:07:57,415 --> 01:07:58,583 I'm so sorry. 1174 01:07:58,683 --> 01:07:59,150 Am I late. 1175 01:07:59,249 --> 01:08:00,350 Oh, who's this? 1176 01:08:00,450 --> 01:08:01,651 Come, Edward. 1177 01:08:01,753 --> 01:08:02,120 What? 1178 01:08:02,220 --> 01:08:03,453 Not you. 1179 01:08:03,553 --> 01:08:03,920 Come. 1180 01:08:04,020 --> 01:08:04,688 Come here. 1181 01:08:04,788 --> 01:08:05,222 Come here, boy. 1182 01:08:05,322 --> 01:08:06,590 Good boy. 1183 01:08:06,690 --> 01:08:07,124 Good boy. 1184 01:08:07,224 --> 01:08:08,024 Sit. 1185 01:08:08,125 --> 01:08:08,891 Good boy. 1186 01:08:08,992 --> 01:08:09,859 Sit. 1187 01:08:09,959 --> 01:08:11,292 Good boy. 1188 01:08:11,393 --> 01:08:12,795 Hello, I'm here, too. 1189 01:08:12,895 --> 01:08:13,863 Hello, hello, hello. 1190 01:08:13,963 --> 01:08:14,696 How are you, Grace? 1191 01:08:14,796 --> 01:08:16,364 Fine, fine, fine. 1192 01:08:16,464 --> 01:08:17,799 Thank you for this, Peter. 1193 01:08:17,899 --> 01:08:19,299 Shall we proceed. 1194 01:08:19,399 --> 01:08:20,634 By all means. 1195 01:08:20,734 --> 01:08:23,904 This is the summary of the financial agreement. 1196 01:08:24,004 --> 01:08:27,340 This is the deed signing over the house into your sole name, 1197 01:08:27,440 --> 01:08:28,541 Mrs. Axton. 1198 01:08:28,641 --> 01:08:30,543 This is the application for the decree. 1199 01:08:30,643 --> 01:08:35,147 All you have to do is sign by the yellow tags. 1200 01:08:35,247 --> 01:08:36,515 Hah. 1201 01:08:36,615 --> 01:08:38,616 What happens if I don't? 1202 01:08:38,716 --> 01:08:42,753 Then this agreement is set aside, and we start again. 1203 01:08:42,853 --> 01:08:44,587 But I have to see in your interest 1204 01:08:44,687 --> 01:08:46,990 that this is a very good settlement. 1205 01:08:47,090 --> 01:08:48,925 No court would give half as much. 1206 01:08:49,025 --> 01:08:51,660 You get the entire value of the family home. 1207 01:08:51,760 --> 01:08:52,162 Stop it. 1208 01:08:52,262 --> 01:08:53,729 Mom. 1209 01:08:53,829 --> 01:08:55,898 How can he sit there and say that I get the entire value 1210 01:08:55,998 --> 01:08:59,634 of the family home when the entire value of the family home 1211 01:08:59,734 --> 01:09:01,869 is precisely what's being taken from me. 1212 01:09:01,969 --> 01:09:03,004 I knew this wouldn't work. 1213 01:09:03,104 --> 01:09:03,904 Yes, it will. 1214 01:09:04,004 --> 01:09:05,472 I'm being business like. 1215 01:09:05,572 --> 01:09:10,876 No more references to sneaking two-faced marital treachery. 1216 01:09:10,976 --> 01:09:13,813 So this settlement you and Edward come up with, 1217 01:09:13,913 --> 01:09:16,148 do I get more than I'd get if he died? 1218 01:09:16,248 --> 01:09:17,115 If he died? 1219 01:09:17,215 --> 01:09:18,283 Yes. 1220 01:09:18,382 --> 01:09:20,118 Well, no. 1221 01:09:20,218 --> 01:09:21,585 As things stand, if your husband died, 1222 01:09:21,685 --> 01:09:24,320 you'd get the house, your joint savings, 1223 01:09:24,420 --> 01:09:26,656 and a full widow's pension. 1224 01:09:26,756 --> 01:09:30,560 And if we get a divorce, I get less? 1225 01:09:30,660 --> 01:09:31,693 Yes. 1226 01:09:31,794 --> 01:09:34,696 So it would be better for me if you were dead? 1227 01:09:34,796 --> 01:09:35,730 But I'm not. 1228 01:09:35,831 --> 01:09:37,766 It would be better in every way. 1229 01:09:37,866 --> 01:09:40,835 If I have to manage without you, I'd... 1230 01:09:40,935 --> 01:09:42,402 I'd rather be a widow. 1231 01:09:42,502 --> 01:09:46,273 A widow has so much more status than a left woman. 1232 01:09:46,372 --> 01:09:48,174 I could put flowers on your grave 1233 01:09:48,274 --> 01:09:50,542 and remember all the good times we had 1234 01:09:50,642 --> 01:09:54,313 and look forward to seeing you again in heaven. 1235 01:09:54,412 --> 01:09:56,747 Reunited as they put on the gravestones. 1236 01:09:56,848 --> 01:09:59,884 Only as things stand, there's no grave. 1237 01:09:59,984 --> 01:10:02,519 You've poisoned all my memories, and when we meet again 1238 01:10:02,619 --> 01:10:04,921 in the next world, they'll be bloody Angela 1239 01:10:05,021 --> 01:10:05,755 clogging the place out. 1240 01:10:05,856 --> 01:10:06,590 Angela was right. 1241 01:10:06,690 --> 01:10:07,556 I shouldn't have agreed to this. 1242 01:10:07,656 --> 01:10:09,859 Sit. 1243 01:10:09,959 --> 01:10:10,826 Fuck Angela. 1244 01:10:16,064 --> 01:10:17,232 Sorry, Mr. Whitacomb. 1245 01:10:17,333 --> 01:10:19,700 He makes me do these things. 1246 01:10:19,801 --> 01:10:21,401 It's the way he walks away. 1247 01:10:21,501 --> 01:10:22,803 It drives me mad. 1248 01:10:22,903 --> 01:10:24,403 Is there any point going on with this? 1249 01:10:24,503 --> 01:10:25,571 Is there any point? 1250 01:10:25,671 --> 01:10:28,741 Yes, there's a point. 1251 01:10:28,841 --> 01:10:30,710 Look at Jamie. 1252 01:10:30,810 --> 01:10:32,577 He's our son. 1253 01:10:32,677 --> 01:10:34,045 He's part you and part me. 1254 01:10:34,146 --> 01:10:35,614 We made him. 1255 01:10:35,714 --> 01:10:38,917 We joined together, and we made him. 1256 01:10:39,017 --> 01:10:41,085 Now you know as well as I do that the church 1257 01:10:41,185 --> 01:10:42,853 says marriage is a bond. 1258 01:10:42,953 --> 01:10:48,157 It cannot be dissolved, and that's why it makes people. 1259 01:10:48,258 --> 01:10:51,094 You can get lawyers to put whatever you want on paper, 1260 01:10:51,194 --> 01:10:53,729 but you're still my husband and Jamie's father. 1261 01:10:53,829 --> 01:10:56,098 And you will be until the day you die. 1262 01:10:56,198 --> 01:10:57,266 I know your view. 1263 01:10:57,366 --> 01:10:58,900 This isn't a view. 1264 01:10:59,000 --> 01:10:59,667 This is how it is. 1265 01:10:59,767 --> 01:11:00,668 For you. 1266 01:11:00,768 --> 01:11:04,171 No, not just for me, for everybody. 1267 01:11:04,272 --> 01:11:05,805 You can't invent a private reality. 1268 01:11:05,906 --> 01:11:06,806 Nor can you. 1269 01:11:06,907 --> 01:11:08,375 Mine isn't a private reality. 1270 01:11:08,474 --> 01:11:09,842 Well, then nor is mine. 1271 01:11:09,942 --> 01:11:11,477 Yes, it is. 1272 01:11:11,577 --> 01:11:12,477 Isn't it, Jamie? 1273 01:11:12,578 --> 01:11:13,678 Don't ask me to take sides. 1274 01:11:13,779 --> 01:11:15,314 Don't ask you to take sides 1275 01:11:15,413 --> 01:11:16,915 between reality and madness? 1276 01:11:17,015 --> 01:11:20,251 That's what it is, deciding when you're married when you're not 1277 01:11:20,351 --> 01:11:21,652 whenever it happens to suit you. 1278 01:11:21,752 --> 01:11:23,287 It's madness and chaos. 1279 01:11:23,388 --> 01:11:25,355 If you're not going to sign the papers, 1280 01:11:25,454 --> 01:11:26,689 I might as well leave. 1281 01:11:26,789 --> 01:11:28,824 I'm sorry about this, Peter. 1282 01:11:28,925 --> 01:11:31,894 Everybody keeps saying they're sorry, but none of you 1283 01:11:31,994 --> 01:11:32,727 are sorry, not one bit. 1284 01:11:32,827 --> 01:11:33,962 Mom, you're making a mistake. 1285 01:11:34,062 --> 01:11:35,597 Am I, darling? 1286 01:11:35,697 --> 01:11:36,831 Tell me what I should do? 1287 01:11:36,932 --> 01:11:38,732 I think you should sign the papers. 1288 01:11:38,832 --> 01:11:41,369 You still don't see it do you? 1289 01:11:41,468 --> 01:11:43,938 No one sees it. 1290 01:11:44,038 --> 01:11:49,474 Maybe I... maybe I do live in my own private reality. 1291 01:11:49,574 --> 01:11:52,312 I don't care about any of this. 1292 01:11:52,412 --> 01:11:55,314 I don't care about money. 1293 01:11:55,414 --> 01:11:58,616 It's really very simple. 1294 01:11:58,716 --> 01:12:02,920 I... I love you, Edward, whether I want to or not. 1295 01:12:03,020 --> 01:12:06,723 And I never thought in a million years you'd stop loving me. 1296 01:12:11,328 --> 01:12:13,494 I just... now I feel... 1297 01:12:13,594 --> 01:12:18,967 I don't know... hurt. 1298 01:12:19,067 --> 01:12:21,802 You understand? 1299 01:12:21,902 --> 01:12:22,337 I know you do. 1300 01:12:22,437 --> 01:12:23,136 Yes. 1301 01:12:26,039 --> 01:12:26,940 Yes. 1302 01:12:27,040 --> 01:12:28,074 I hate this. 1303 01:12:28,175 --> 01:12:29,475 I hate hurting you. 1304 01:12:29,575 --> 01:12:33,845 I'd give anything not to have, but I can't help it. 1305 01:12:33,945 --> 01:12:35,348 I'm sorry. 1306 01:12:35,448 --> 01:12:36,681 It's happened now. 1307 01:12:36,781 --> 01:12:39,050 It's just... it's just happened, and I'm sorry. 1308 01:12:39,150 --> 01:12:39,717 It's... 1309 01:12:43,120 --> 01:12:43,954 Grace is right. 1310 01:12:44,054 --> 01:12:44,989 There's nothing to sign. 1311 01:12:57,099 --> 01:12:58,133 I'm so sorry. 1312 01:13:04,604 --> 01:13:06,806 Your turn to say you're sorry, too. 1313 01:13:06,906 --> 01:13:08,574 Actually, I regret that we've 1314 01:13:08,674 --> 01:13:10,210 not been able to reach a mutually 1315 01:13:10,310 --> 01:13:11,510 satisfactory agreement. 1316 01:13:11,610 --> 01:13:12,678 That's what I'm here for. 1317 01:13:12,778 --> 01:13:14,313 A mutually satisfactory agreement? 1318 01:13:14,413 --> 01:13:16,115 Yes, where possible. 1319 01:13:16,215 --> 01:13:18,516 Who are you, Nelson Mandela? 1320 01:13:18,616 --> 01:13:20,351 Mom, time to go. 1321 01:13:20,451 --> 01:13:22,120 Yes, it's time to go. 1322 01:13:22,220 --> 01:13:23,553 That's what time it is. 1323 01:13:23,653 --> 01:13:25,122 Time to go. 1324 01:13:25,222 --> 01:13:25,822 Come on, Eddie. 1325 01:13:25,922 --> 01:13:26,289 Let's go. 1326 01:13:33,496 --> 01:13:37,899 Once left behind on the road, they froze to death. 1327 01:13:37,999 --> 01:13:42,236 This was understood to be an accident. 1328 01:13:42,336 --> 01:13:44,771 Nobody looked back. 1329 01:13:44,871 --> 01:13:48,274 By abandoning the weak, the strong survived. 1330 01:13:52,145 --> 01:13:55,546 It may seem brutal, but what's the point 1331 01:13:55,646 --> 01:13:56,948 of everyone ending up dead? 1332 01:14:03,387 --> 01:14:04,288 Mom. 1333 01:14:09,325 --> 01:14:11,126 Mom. 1334 01:14:11,226 --> 01:14:11,827 Hey. 1335 01:14:48,925 --> 01:14:49,325 Mom. 1336 01:14:52,328 --> 01:14:52,928 You all right? 1337 01:14:55,497 --> 01:14:57,932 Can we... please. 1338 01:15:12,811 --> 01:15:16,881 Let's do the old walk down to Hope Gap. 1339 01:15:30,993 --> 01:15:34,430 I used to love coming here. 1340 01:15:34,530 --> 01:15:35,864 It's like my secret world. 1341 01:15:41,603 --> 01:15:42,870 Why you look at me like that? 1342 01:15:42,970 --> 01:15:45,172 Trying to think how I can help you. 1343 01:15:45,272 --> 01:15:47,173 Oh, I'll be all right. 1344 01:15:47,273 --> 01:15:49,275 You'll be fine. 1345 01:15:49,375 --> 01:15:50,510 That's what we say. 1346 01:15:50,610 --> 01:15:52,278 Let's not say that anymore. 1347 01:15:52,378 --> 01:15:53,111 What's the point? 1348 01:15:53,211 --> 01:15:54,880 Let's not pretend. 1349 01:15:54,980 --> 01:15:57,948 Neither of us are all right, are we? 1350 01:15:58,048 --> 01:16:00,284 Not really. 1351 01:16:00,384 --> 01:16:02,886 What is it? 1352 01:16:02,987 --> 01:16:06,524 There are one or two things going wrong for me 1353 01:16:06,624 --> 01:16:08,458 in a minor sort of way. 1354 01:16:08,558 --> 01:16:10,360 Is it work or the other thing? 1355 01:16:10,460 --> 01:16:11,394 It's the other thing. 1356 01:16:11,494 --> 01:16:12,127 Oh. 1357 01:16:12,227 --> 01:16:12,562 What is it? 1358 01:16:12,661 --> 01:16:13,562 Why? 1359 01:16:13,661 --> 01:16:15,264 It's what you said. 1360 01:16:15,364 --> 01:16:18,332 Seems I'm not very good at making people love me. 1361 01:16:18,432 --> 01:16:20,867 How could anyone not love you? 1362 01:16:20,968 --> 01:16:23,404 I think I'm a bit un-forthcoming. 1363 01:16:23,504 --> 01:16:24,337 Like Edward. 1364 01:16:24,437 --> 01:16:26,306 Probably. 1365 01:16:26,406 --> 01:16:28,141 You must get over it, darling. 1366 01:16:28,241 --> 01:16:29,208 You must forth come. 1367 01:16:29,308 --> 01:16:32,411 Well, it doesn't seem to be very easy. 1368 01:16:32,511 --> 01:16:34,446 But you do want to. 1369 01:16:34,547 --> 01:16:40,050 I want all the usual things, and it doesn't happen. 1370 01:16:40,151 --> 01:16:41,352 There was someone, but it doesn't 1371 01:16:41,452 --> 01:16:42,419 seem to have quite worked out. 1372 01:16:42,520 --> 01:16:44,555 It seems I'm the problem. 1373 01:16:44,655 --> 01:16:48,090 Like me? 1374 01:16:48,191 --> 01:16:49,091 Sorry. 1375 01:16:49,192 --> 01:16:50,193 I shouldn't be talking about myself. 1376 01:16:50,293 --> 01:16:52,528 No, it makes a change. 1377 01:16:52,628 --> 01:16:55,931 Would you mind if I prayed for you for things to work out? 1378 01:16:56,031 --> 01:16:57,065 No. 1379 01:16:57,165 --> 01:16:59,467 If it works, will you start believing again? 1380 01:16:59,568 --> 01:17:01,335 If it doesn't, will you stop? 1381 01:17:01,435 --> 01:17:02,636 No. 1382 01:17:02,735 --> 01:17:05,138 I couldn't even if I wanted to, which I do. 1383 01:17:05,238 --> 01:17:08,740 If I could only stop believing, then I could get out, which 1384 01:17:08,840 --> 01:17:12,344 I longed to do night and day. 1385 01:17:12,444 --> 01:17:13,946 Please don't get out. 1386 01:17:14,046 --> 01:17:16,747 Well, I really just want to fall asleep, Jamie. 1387 01:17:16,847 --> 01:17:17,915 No more waking. 1388 01:17:18,015 --> 01:17:20,384 It's the waking that hurts so much. 1389 01:17:20,484 --> 01:17:24,120 That moment coming out of a confusion of dreams 1390 01:17:24,221 --> 01:17:26,389 and you think maybe it's not true. 1391 01:17:26,489 --> 01:17:30,326 Maybe he's lying there after all. 1392 01:17:30,426 --> 01:17:32,894 You turn your head on the pillow, there's no one there. 1393 01:17:36,097 --> 01:17:38,832 I know I should say come and live with me... 1394 01:17:38,933 --> 01:17:39,701 No, it's all right. 1395 01:17:39,800 --> 01:17:40,901 I don't want to. 1396 01:17:41,001 --> 01:17:44,438 I think I'm just a bit frightened. 1397 01:17:44,538 --> 01:17:47,608 Of my unhappiness? 1398 01:17:47,708 --> 01:17:50,875 Yeah. 1399 01:17:50,977 --> 01:17:52,345 It frightens me, too. 1400 01:17:58,949 --> 01:18:01,185 I wanted to do it, you know. 1401 01:18:04,355 --> 01:18:06,923 You won't? 1402 01:18:07,023 --> 01:18:08,790 Can't make any promises. 1403 01:18:12,494 --> 01:18:19,800 In that horror the solicitor's office, that was my last shot. 1404 01:18:19,900 --> 01:18:23,638 If you did, would you tell me first? 1405 01:18:23,738 --> 01:18:26,373 I don't know. 1406 01:18:26,473 --> 01:18:28,375 Do you want me to? 1407 01:18:28,475 --> 01:18:30,644 Well, I'm the one who'd have to clear after you. 1408 01:18:30,744 --> 01:18:32,945 Oh, yes, I suppose so. 1409 01:18:33,045 --> 01:18:34,179 Hadn't thought of that. 1410 01:18:34,280 --> 01:18:37,282 Now I want to say something different. 1411 01:18:37,382 --> 01:18:39,783 I want you to know that I do understand. 1412 01:18:42,386 --> 01:18:47,023 After all, suppose it was cancer and you were in unbearable pain 1413 01:18:47,123 --> 01:18:51,227 and dying only too slowly, what... 1414 01:18:51,327 --> 01:18:53,396 then I'd say end it now wouldn't I? 1415 01:18:53,496 --> 01:18:54,963 Out of my love for you. 1416 01:18:55,063 --> 01:18:57,565 So if your life hurts you so much that you want to end it, 1417 01:18:57,666 --> 01:18:59,900 I won't stop you. 1418 01:19:00,000 --> 01:19:06,640 Out of my love you, only just tell me. 1419 01:19:06,740 --> 01:19:08,807 Don't let it be a surprise. 1420 01:19:08,907 --> 01:19:10,143 Give me time to say goodbye. 1421 01:19:13,713 --> 01:19:17,848 You must've known some sad dark times to say that to me. 1422 01:19:17,948 --> 01:19:22,453 I can't ask you to live for me. 1423 01:19:22,553 --> 01:19:26,990 But we each have to carry our own burden. 1424 01:19:27,090 --> 01:19:28,458 You're like to explorer. 1425 01:19:28,558 --> 01:19:30,660 You're further down the road. 1426 01:19:30,760 --> 01:19:32,227 You've gone on ahead. 1427 01:19:32,328 --> 01:19:34,129 So if after a while you don't go on anymore, 1428 01:19:34,229 --> 01:19:39,100 then I'll know that the road is too hard and for too long. 1429 01:19:39,200 --> 01:19:41,469 I'll know that in the end, the unhappiness wins. 1430 01:19:44,171 --> 01:19:51,744 But if you do go on and bear it, terrible as it is, then 1431 01:19:51,843 --> 01:19:54,346 I'll know that however bad it gets, 1432 01:19:54,446 --> 01:19:56,548 I can last it out because you did before me. 1433 01:20:00,884 --> 01:20:05,154 My darling boy, how you've grown up. 1434 01:20:31,043 --> 01:20:32,945 This is very grand. 1435 01:20:33,045 --> 01:20:34,879 I'm paying. 1436 01:20:34,979 --> 01:20:36,981 I'm not even sure I know what any of this means. 1437 01:20:37,081 --> 01:20:38,816 What's brandade? 1438 01:20:38,916 --> 01:20:39,584 What's kimchi? 1439 01:20:39,684 --> 01:20:41,051 Have the lamb. 1440 01:20:41,151 --> 01:20:43,821 You don't think I should be a bit more adventurous? 1441 01:20:43,920 --> 01:20:45,655 Two of the Welsh lamb please. 1442 01:20:45,756 --> 01:20:46,490 All right, yep. 1443 01:20:46,590 --> 01:20:47,156 Thank you. 1444 01:20:47,256 --> 01:20:47,657 Thanks. 1445 01:20:51,327 --> 01:20:52,728 How is she? 1446 01:20:52,828 --> 01:20:57,031 She started volunteering for something called Friendline. 1447 01:20:57,132 --> 01:20:59,933 It's for people who reached the end of the line. 1448 01:21:00,033 --> 01:21:02,669 The end of the line, dear God. 1449 01:21:02,770 --> 01:21:03,936 She's doing all right. 1450 01:21:04,036 --> 01:21:05,739 You didn't have to worry. 1451 01:21:05,839 --> 01:21:09,075 Or feel guilty. 1452 01:21:09,175 --> 01:21:12,545 I didn't think any of us have as much control over our lives 1453 01:21:12,645 --> 01:21:13,813 as we pretend. 1454 01:21:13,912 --> 01:21:16,848 Angela says Grace and I weren't suited, 1455 01:21:16,947 --> 01:21:18,482 and I should have left years ago. 1456 01:21:18,583 --> 01:21:19,718 Why didn't you? 1457 01:21:19,818 --> 01:21:22,420 It never really seemed an option. 1458 01:21:22,520 --> 01:21:25,155 Do you think I should? 1459 01:21:25,255 --> 01:21:27,424 I think if you were going to leave now, 1460 01:21:27,524 --> 01:21:29,726 you should have left earlier if you see what I mean. 1461 01:21:29,826 --> 01:21:31,293 I didn't know. 1462 01:21:31,393 --> 01:21:34,028 If I had to blame you for anything, it would be that. 1463 01:21:34,129 --> 01:21:35,597 For not leaving earlier? 1464 01:21:35,697 --> 01:21:39,066 For going on being nice and making cups of tea and letting 1465 01:21:39,167 --> 01:21:40,835 her think that you were happy. 1466 01:21:40,934 --> 01:21:43,069 For not getting angry when she went for you. 1467 01:21:43,170 --> 01:21:46,506 For not telling you what you really wanted. 1468 01:21:46,606 --> 01:21:49,275 For not letting them know what it felt like to be you. 1469 01:21:49,375 --> 01:21:51,710 Oh, Jamie, you don't know how hard that is. 1470 01:21:51,811 --> 01:21:52,745 Don't I? 1471 01:21:52,845 --> 01:21:55,246 But I think she knew even so. 1472 01:21:55,346 --> 01:21:57,081 I don't. 1473 01:21:57,182 --> 01:21:59,617 Right up until the day you left, she 1474 01:21:59,717 --> 01:22:01,018 thought you adored each other. 1475 01:22:01,118 --> 01:22:03,153 It's complicated, you know. 1476 01:22:03,253 --> 01:22:08,257 You can love somebody and want to leave them at the same time. 1477 01:22:08,357 --> 01:22:11,461 When you say she adored me, no, that wasn't me. 1478 01:22:11,561 --> 01:22:14,663 That was someone she invented, the Edward she wanted. 1479 01:22:14,763 --> 01:22:17,466 And she never really forgave me for not being him. 1480 01:22:17,566 --> 01:22:21,635 It made me feel like I was always in the wrong... 1481 01:22:21,735 --> 01:22:23,704 in the wrong but innocent. 1482 01:22:23,804 --> 01:22:26,272 Now I feel what I've done is right, 1483 01:22:26,372 --> 01:22:31,076 but I feel guilty because I'm happy and she isn't. 1484 01:22:31,176 --> 01:22:32,478 That's my crime. 1485 01:22:36,782 --> 01:22:37,682 What's that? 1486 01:22:37,783 --> 01:22:41,519 That is the lamb's fry. 1487 01:22:41,619 --> 01:22:45,722 Lamb's fry what? 1488 01:22:45,822 --> 01:22:47,089 Yes, go on. 1489 01:22:47,189 --> 01:22:49,258 I'm still listening. 1490 01:22:49,358 --> 01:22:52,093 That's OK. 1491 01:22:52,194 --> 01:22:53,395 That's what we're here for, yes. 1492 01:22:53,496 --> 01:22:56,598 So not only did he walk out on my birthday, 1493 01:22:56,698 --> 01:22:58,266 taking the bottle of champagne I brought 1494 01:22:58,366 --> 01:23:01,068 to celebrate my birthday, he also 1495 01:23:01,168 --> 01:23:04,671 left me for Jeffrey, who was the first boyfriend 1496 01:23:04,771 --> 01:23:06,439 to walk out on me. 1497 01:23:06,540 --> 01:23:07,373 Typical men. 1498 01:23:07,473 --> 01:23:08,976 I mean, what was he thinking? 1499 01:23:09,075 --> 01:23:11,811 Men don't think or feel. 1500 01:23:11,911 --> 01:23:13,678 They have no feelings at all. 1501 01:23:13,779 --> 01:23:16,013 I'm still listening. 1502 01:23:23,988 --> 01:23:25,355 Friendline. 1503 01:23:28,424 --> 01:23:30,192 Yes. 1504 01:23:30,292 --> 01:23:33,662 No, I really do want to hear it. 1505 01:23:33,762 --> 01:23:36,364 Oh, the cliffs. 1506 01:23:36,464 --> 01:23:40,001 I've been into all that myself. 1507 01:23:40,100 --> 01:23:41,636 They look vertical, but they're not. 1508 01:23:41,736 --> 01:23:46,206 They have bumps sticking out, and you hit them as you fall. 1509 01:23:46,306 --> 01:23:50,576 Well, exactly, it isn't fair, is it? 1510 01:23:50,676 --> 01:23:52,378 Do you know what's even more unfair, 1511 01:23:52,478 --> 01:23:56,447 at least if you believe what I believe? 1512 01:23:56,548 --> 01:23:58,516 Your life is so unbearable you decide 1513 01:23:58,616 --> 01:24:02,419 to end it, the next thing you know you've gone to hell. 1514 01:24:02,519 --> 01:24:03,120 Honestly. 1515 01:24:45,956 --> 01:24:48,457 My friend on the phone lines is gay. 1516 01:24:48,558 --> 01:24:51,927 Turns out he's been left just like me. 1517 01:24:52,027 --> 01:24:54,162 So we talk about what it's like and how 1518 01:24:54,262 --> 01:24:57,799 men are all selfish pigs and how is one to cope. 1519 01:24:57,899 --> 01:24:59,400 Oh, and I told him all about you. 1520 01:24:59,500 --> 01:25:00,835 He said you're probably gay. 1521 01:25:00,935 --> 01:25:02,102 He did. 1522 01:25:02,202 --> 01:25:03,904 You're not, are you? 1523 01:25:04,004 --> 01:25:06,272 No, not as it happens. 1524 01:25:06,372 --> 01:25:09,408 You could be refusing to admit your true nature. 1525 01:25:09,508 --> 01:25:10,943 Do you want me to be gay. 1526 01:25:11,043 --> 01:25:13,879 Oh, I just want you to be happy. 1527 01:25:13,980 --> 01:25:15,213 There's a good boy. 1528 01:25:15,313 --> 01:25:18,182 Let's show him your new trick. 1529 01:25:18,282 --> 01:25:20,384 Die, Edward, die. 1530 01:25:20,484 --> 01:25:21,952 Oh. 1531 01:25:22,052 --> 01:25:24,253 There, isn't he clever? 1532 01:25:24,354 --> 01:25:25,756 Wouldn't it be something if I could 1533 01:25:25,856 --> 01:25:27,156 get the real Edward to do that? 1534 01:25:27,256 --> 01:25:28,391 What, make him die? 1535 01:25:28,491 --> 01:25:31,193 Well, roll about on the ground a bit. 1536 01:25:31,293 --> 01:25:34,096 Oh, there's my beautiful boy. 1537 01:25:34,196 --> 01:25:37,632 Is this dog your husband or your son? 1538 01:25:37,733 --> 01:25:38,633 Why? 1539 01:25:38,733 --> 01:25:39,634 Are you jealous? 1540 01:25:39,734 --> 01:25:40,935 No, this is an improvement on the way 1541 01:25:41,035 --> 01:25:42,235 you were talking a few weeks ago. 1542 01:25:42,335 --> 01:25:44,904 And how is I talking a few weeks ago? 1543 01:25:45,006 --> 01:25:47,440 All that stuff about getting out. 1544 01:25:47,540 --> 01:25:49,475 Oh, yes. 1545 01:25:49,575 --> 01:25:51,677 Yes, well, I've moved on from that. 1546 01:25:51,777 --> 01:25:55,313 The thing about unhappiness is after a while, 1547 01:25:55,413 --> 01:25:59,384 it stops being interesting. 1548 01:25:59,484 --> 01:26:02,719 Did I tell you I've gone back to my anthology? 1549 01:26:02,819 --> 01:26:06,455 See I've been collecting the poems under headings... 1550 01:26:06,556 --> 01:26:10,593 feeling lonely, death of a loved one, that sort of thing. 1551 01:26:10,693 --> 01:26:13,294 Only really good poems, of course. 1552 01:26:13,395 --> 01:26:14,663 No greeting cards nonsense. 1553 01:26:14,763 --> 01:26:17,532 Marriage breakdown, that's a big one. 1554 01:26:17,632 --> 01:26:19,801 And feeling you're a failure. 1555 01:26:19,901 --> 01:26:21,902 That's huge. 1556 01:26:22,002 --> 01:26:23,236 Can I? 1557 01:26:28,142 --> 01:26:30,175 What do you plan to do with this? 1558 01:26:30,275 --> 01:26:32,678 It's a sort of constellation system. 1559 01:26:32,778 --> 01:26:35,714 Something bad happens to you, you look it up in my anthology. 1560 01:26:35,814 --> 01:26:36,782 Right, I... 1561 01:26:36,882 --> 01:26:38,315 I get that. 1562 01:26:38,416 --> 01:26:40,618 I mean, how are you going to get people to know about it? 1563 01:26:40,718 --> 01:26:42,452 Well, it's going to be a book I hope. 1564 01:26:42,553 --> 01:26:44,454 This should be a website, Mom. 1565 01:26:44,554 --> 01:26:46,256 It's perfect for the internet. 1566 01:26:46,356 --> 01:26:47,924 You could have a search bar, and you 1567 01:26:48,024 --> 01:26:49,726 could type in feeling lonely. 1568 01:26:49,826 --> 01:26:53,962 And then it would give you links to poems about loneliness. 1569 01:26:54,063 --> 01:26:55,229 How would it do that? 1570 01:26:55,329 --> 01:26:56,230 Well, that's easy. 1571 01:26:56,330 --> 01:26:58,232 That's what I do every day. 1572 01:26:58,332 --> 01:27:01,401 The hard part is this, is building the database. 1573 01:27:01,501 --> 01:27:04,172 No, it's not a database. 1574 01:27:04,271 --> 01:27:05,972 It's an anthology. 1575 01:27:06,073 --> 01:27:07,908 Can you expand it? 1576 01:27:08,008 --> 01:27:09,009 You want more? 1577 01:27:09,109 --> 01:27:09,809 Much more. 1578 01:27:09,909 --> 01:27:11,377 Oh. 1579 01:27:11,477 --> 01:27:14,846 I know more poems if that's what you mean, hundreds more. 1580 01:27:14,947 --> 01:27:16,915 What are you going to call it? 1581 01:27:17,015 --> 01:27:20,684 I'm thinking of calling it "I Have Been Here Before." 1582 01:27:20,784 --> 01:27:22,187 That's rather the point, you see. 1583 01:27:22,286 --> 01:27:24,621 Others have been through these things before us. 1584 01:27:24,722 --> 01:27:27,990 I don't know why that should be comforting, but it is. 1585 01:27:28,091 --> 01:27:29,525 Because they survived? 1586 01:27:29,625 --> 01:27:30,960 Some did. 1587 01:27:31,060 --> 01:27:32,761 Some didn't. 1588 01:27:32,861 --> 01:27:36,665 It's the first line of a poem by Rossetti. 1589 01:27:36,765 --> 01:27:37,398 Do you know it? 1590 01:27:37,498 --> 01:27:38,466 No. 1591 01:27:38,566 --> 01:27:40,135 Do you want me to say it for you? 1592 01:27:40,234 --> 01:27:42,469 Yes, I'd like that. 1593 01:27:42,570 --> 01:27:45,271 I have been here before. 1594 01:27:45,371 --> 01:27:48,875 When or how, I cannot tell. 1595 01:27:48,975 --> 01:27:51,844 I know the grass beyond the door, 1596 01:27:51,944 --> 01:27:56,982 the keen sweet smell, the sighing sound, 1597 01:27:57,082 --> 01:27:59,851 the lights around the shore. 1598 01:27:59,951 --> 01:28:03,386 You have been mine before. 1599 01:28:03,487 --> 01:28:06,957 How long ago, I may not know. 1600 01:28:07,057 --> 01:28:11,160 But just when at that swallow saw, 1601 01:28:11,259 --> 01:28:15,730 your neck turned so some veil did fall. 1602 01:28:15,830 --> 01:28:18,700 I knew it all of yore. 1603 01:28:18,800 --> 01:28:25,505 Has this been thus before, and shall not thus times eddying 1604 01:28:25,605 --> 01:28:29,675 flight still with our lives, our loves restore 1605 01:28:29,776 --> 01:28:33,179 in death's despite and day and night 1606 01:28:33,278 --> 01:28:35,747 yield one delight once more? 1607 01:28:42,820 --> 01:28:43,386 Edward. 1608 01:28:45,922 --> 01:28:46,990 It's so dull. 1609 01:28:47,090 --> 01:28:48,224 What are you doing here, Grace? 1610 01:28:48,323 --> 01:28:51,360 Is this really how you want to live? 1611 01:28:51,460 --> 01:28:53,128 This is at Angela's house. 1612 01:28:53,228 --> 01:28:56,764 Yes, Angela. 1613 01:28:56,864 --> 01:28:57,431 Where is she? 1614 01:28:57,532 --> 01:28:58,633 I don't want a row. 1615 01:28:58,733 --> 01:28:59,901 Grace, I won't stand for it. 1616 01:29:00,001 --> 01:29:00,902 No. 1617 01:29:01,002 --> 01:29:03,303 I don't want a row either. 1618 01:29:03,403 --> 01:29:04,971 I came to bring you these. 1619 01:29:07,741 --> 01:29:11,644 But maybe you don't want them anymore. 1620 01:29:14,846 --> 01:29:19,250 So all along, you wanted to live like this. 1621 01:29:19,349 --> 01:29:21,785 Why didn't you tell me? 1622 01:29:21,885 --> 01:29:24,353 You must feel all those years with me were 1623 01:29:24,453 --> 01:29:25,789 another life, another planet. 1624 01:29:28,658 --> 01:29:33,628 We did have a marriage, didn't we, on that other planet? 1625 01:29:33,728 --> 01:29:36,731 And now you're living a different life. 1626 01:29:42,536 --> 01:29:44,271 You must be Angela. 1627 01:29:44,370 --> 01:29:45,371 Yes, that's right. 1628 01:29:45,471 --> 01:29:46,739 She just walked in. 1629 01:29:46,840 --> 01:29:48,808 Yes. 1630 01:29:48,908 --> 01:29:51,677 I don't think I really believed you existed. 1631 01:29:54,445 --> 01:29:57,149 Please sit. 1632 01:29:57,249 --> 01:29:59,050 No. 1633 01:29:59,150 --> 01:29:59,717 Not staying. 1634 01:30:04,155 --> 01:30:05,188 What did you think you were doing? 1635 01:30:05,288 --> 01:30:06,355 Grace... 1636 01:30:06,455 --> 01:30:07,824 I mean, what gave you the right. 1637 01:30:07,924 --> 01:30:08,524 That's enough. 1638 01:30:08,624 --> 01:30:09,425 It's all right, Edward. 1639 01:30:09,525 --> 01:30:10,126 I can speak for myself. 1640 01:30:15,463 --> 01:30:20,634 I think I thought there was three unhappy people. 1641 01:30:25,638 --> 01:30:26,706 And now there's only one. 1642 01:30:38,350 --> 01:30:39,550 Yes, I see. 1643 01:30:51,426 --> 01:30:56,064 Grace, Grace, can't we... 1644 01:30:56,164 --> 01:30:58,367 can't we be friends? 1645 01:30:58,466 --> 01:31:01,501 Friends, uh, no. 1646 01:31:01,601 --> 01:31:03,703 I don't think so. 1647 01:31:03,803 --> 01:31:07,207 It all went on too long, didn't it? 1648 01:31:07,307 --> 01:31:08,108 I wish... 1649 01:31:11,110 --> 01:31:12,477 You wish we'd never met? 1650 01:31:12,578 --> 01:31:14,179 No, of course, not. 1651 01:31:14,280 --> 01:31:15,014 I do. 1652 01:31:15,114 --> 01:31:15,914 I do. 1653 01:31:16,014 --> 01:31:18,049 I wish we'd never met. 1654 01:31:18,149 --> 01:31:23,020 I'd wish I'd never loved you, but we did and I do... 1655 01:31:23,120 --> 01:31:24,721 I did. 1656 01:31:24,821 --> 01:31:28,358 And now I have to try and let you go. 1657 01:31:28,457 --> 01:31:31,526 Don't think too badly of me. 1658 01:31:31,626 --> 01:31:35,563 I try not to think of you at all. 1659 01:31:35,664 --> 01:31:38,300 I'm getting quite good at it during the day. 1660 01:31:38,400 --> 01:31:41,869 But at night, I dream about you. 1661 01:31:41,969 --> 01:31:44,504 Unfair, isn't it? 1662 01:32:36,314 --> 01:32:40,151 All right, so it's called "I've Been Here Before." 1663 01:32:40,251 --> 01:32:42,619 You type into the search bar. 1664 01:32:42,720 --> 01:32:45,989 Anything... love, life, death, anything you like. 1665 01:32:46,089 --> 01:32:49,425 It turns out someone else thought it long ago. 1666 01:32:49,524 --> 01:32:50,859 You're not the only one, so maybe you 1667 01:32:50,960 --> 01:32:52,428 can make it through after all. 1668 01:32:52,527 --> 01:32:53,929 That's what I want to hear. 1669 01:32:54,029 --> 01:32:55,529 How I can make it through after all. 1670 01:32:55,629 --> 01:32:59,633 You want hope, we've got hope. 1671 01:33:03,004 --> 01:33:05,406 "Say Not the Struggle Nought Availeth." 1672 01:33:05,505 --> 01:33:07,539 It's my mom's favorite. 1673 01:33:10,709 --> 01:33:14,346 Say not the struggle nought availeth. 1674 01:33:14,446 --> 01:33:17,281 The labor and the wounds are vain. 1675 01:33:17,383 --> 01:33:20,517 The enemy faints not nor faileth. 1676 01:33:20,617 --> 01:33:24,755 And as things have been, they remain. 1677 01:33:24,855 --> 01:33:27,890 For while, the tired waves vainly breaking 1678 01:33:27,990 --> 01:33:32,627 seem here no painful inch gain far back 1679 01:33:32,727 --> 01:33:35,830 through creeks and inlets making come 1680 01:33:35,930 --> 01:33:39,900 silent flooding in the main. 1681 01:33:40,000 --> 01:33:43,669 And not by eastern windows only when daylight comes 1682 01:33:43,771 --> 01:33:46,039 comes in the light. 1683 01:33:46,140 --> 01:33:51,877 In front, the sun climbs slow, how slowly. 1684 01:33:51,977 --> 01:33:55,280 But westward look, the land is bright. 1685 01:34:07,924 --> 01:34:10,726 I began by thinking I could save you, 1686 01:34:10,826 --> 01:34:14,896 but in the end, all I can do is honor you. 1687 01:34:14,997 --> 01:34:21,635 My mother, first among women, my warmth and my comfort, 1688 01:34:21,735 --> 01:34:28,574 my safety, my pride, you're the one I want to please. 1689 01:34:28,674 --> 01:34:30,643 You're the one I want to applaud me. 1690 01:34:37,348 --> 01:34:46,390 My father, first among men, my teacher and my judge, the man 1691 01:34:46,490 --> 01:34:47,357 I know I will become. 1692 01:34:58,200 --> 01:34:59,633 You grow older now. 1693 01:34:59,733 --> 01:35:04,472 You'll still ahead of me as you'll always be forever 1694 01:35:04,572 --> 01:35:05,872 further down the road. 1695 01:35:11,243 --> 01:35:13,712 Forgive me for needing you to be strong forever. 1696 01:35:18,850 --> 01:35:21,085 Forgive me for fearing your unhappiness. 1697 01:35:25,422 --> 01:35:28,090 As you suffer, so I shall suffer. 1698 01:35:28,191 --> 01:35:30,025 As you endure, so I shall endure. 1699 01:35:33,129 --> 01:35:35,331 Hold my hands and walk the old walk 1700 01:35:35,431 --> 01:35:40,135 one last time then let me go. 1701 01:36:00,661 --> 01:36:05,661 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org