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Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
M_I_SFoEver
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'Dear God, watch over me
as I embark on this next posting.
3
00:03:28,083 --> 00:03:30,500
'Think I'll have to get up
at about six tomorrow.
4
00:03:37,292 --> 00:03:39,000
'The pain in my stomach persists
5
00:03:39,125 --> 00:03:42,458
'and is now further hampered
by menstruation.
6
00:03:42,583 --> 00:03:45,958
'I have taken two ibuprofen
and Milk of Magnesia.
7
00:03:51,333 --> 00:03:52,417
'Forgive me my impatience
8
00:03:52,542 --> 00:03:55,167
'but I hope you will reveal
your plan for me soon.
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00:03:56,125 --> 00:03:58,125
'I can't shake the feeling
that you must have saved me
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00:03:58,250 --> 00:04:00,083
'for something greater than this.
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00:04:02,708 --> 00:04:05,083
'Not that I'm complaining or anything.
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00:04:05,208 --> 00:04:06,333
'Amen.'
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- Hi. Are you Maud?
- Yes. Hi.
14
00:04:54,667 --> 00:04:58,500
So, I left some notes out
on the kitchen table with all her bits.
15
00:04:58,625 --> 00:05:00,125
She has a mate
coming over tomorrow.
16
00:05:00,250 --> 00:05:02,083
Try and keep her off the sauce.
17
00:05:02,208 --> 00:05:04,625
Doctor's just started her
on a new course of B12 shots
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00:05:04,750 --> 00:05:08,167
so she's having one of those
every evening before dinner.
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00:05:08,292 --> 00:05:11,708
Your bedroom's upstairs on the left.
Her majesty's in there, having a nap.
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How is she?
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00:05:14,917 --> 00:05:17,458
Bit of a cunt. Have fun.
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00:06:10,792 --> 00:06:11,875
'Amanda Köhl.
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00:06:13,083 --> 00:06:14,750
'49 years old.'
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00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,583
Can you feel that?
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00:06:16,708 --> 00:06:19,167
'Stage four lymphoma
of the spinal cord.'
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00:06:19,292 --> 00:06:20,292
Yep.
27
00:06:20,417 --> 00:06:22,125
Yep, yep.
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00:06:22,875 --> 00:06:24,875
'I daresay you'll be seeing
this one soon.'
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00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:26,375
- Feel that?
- Uh-huh.
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- We done?
- Mm-hm.
31
00:06:32,667 --> 00:06:34,458
What time would you like dinner?
32
00:06:34,583 --> 00:06:35,708
Eight o'clock.
33
00:06:38,042 --> 00:06:40,833
There's a shopping list
on the hall table.
34
00:06:43,792 --> 00:06:44,792
I got it.
35
00:07:06,583 --> 00:07:08,875
'I looked her up before I came here.
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'Dancer, choreographer,
minor celebrity.
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00:07:13,292 --> 00:07:15,542
'As you know,
I have little time for creative types
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00:07:15,667 --> 00:07:17,875
'as they tend to be rather self-involved.
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00:07:28,625 --> 00:07:30,083
What are you cooking up in there?
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00:07:30,208 --> 00:07:32,292
Spaghetti Bolognese and garlic bread.
41
00:07:33,375 --> 00:07:34,458
Splendid.
42
00:07:54,167 --> 00:07:56,708
- Is that temperature all right?
- Mm, it's fine.
43
00:08:40,625 --> 00:08:41,875
Hello.
44
00:08:45,625 --> 00:08:47,708
- Who's your saint?
- Mary Magdalene.
45
00:08:49,417 --> 00:08:51,833
I didn't know
they made necklaces of her.
46
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I ordered it online.
47
00:09:00,917 --> 00:09:02,708
You're prettier than the last one.
48
00:10:20,875 --> 00:10:22,333
Hey.
49
00:10:23,917 --> 00:10:25,000
What do you think?
50
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,208
It's good.
51
00:10:37,667 --> 00:10:39,417
- You must be Mary.
- No, Maud.
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00:10:39,542 --> 00:10:40,542
Ah.
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Hope we're not turfing you out.
54
00:10:43,417 --> 00:10:46,333
- No, no. I'm going to meet a friend.
- Good, good.
55
00:10:46,458 --> 00:10:47,542
Cheerio, then.
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00:10:50,875 --> 00:10:53,583
'I should have told her
I'd be happy just to stay in my room.
57
00:10:55,750 --> 00:10:57,375
'She must be embarrassed.'
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00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:09,250
- Can you spare some change, please?
- Sorry, mate, I ain't got nothing.
59
00:11:09,375 --> 00:11:10,583
Fuck off, then.
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00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,042
Excuse me, Miss.
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00:11:15,167 --> 00:11:16,500
Can you spare some change, please?
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00:11:22,500 --> 00:11:23,667
Thank you, love.
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00:11:23,792 --> 00:11:25,792
Bit, er... Bit nippy out, innit?
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00:11:25,917 --> 00:11:28,000
May God bless you
and never waste your pain.
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- What?
- Nothing.
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00:11:31,542 --> 00:11:33,542
God bless you too, sweetheart.
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00:11:40,292 --> 00:11:43,000
'Why would someone like her
end up in a town like this?
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00:11:46,583 --> 00:11:49,583
'This dump can't appeal to her
any more than it does to me.
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00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:01,500
Hello?
70
00:12:02,583 --> 00:12:04,375
What's happened?
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00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:05,583
Come back to London.
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00:12:05,708 --> 00:12:08,250
You can't just lock yourself up here.
You should be around people.
73
00:12:08,375 --> 00:12:11,125
Why the fuck do you care
so much all of a sudden?
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00:12:11,250 --> 00:12:13,875
Don't be petulant. You're getting
dangerously Norma Desmond.
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00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,917
Oh, fuck you!
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You stupid cow.
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00:12:19,167 --> 00:12:21,000
- Hello.
- Hello!
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00:12:25,417 --> 00:12:27,292
Sorry to call you back early.
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Silly old thing used
to knock it back no problem.
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Even I couldn't keep up with her.
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Things are different now.
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00:12:33,708 --> 00:12:35,167
Yes.
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00:12:35,292 --> 00:12:36,333
Yes, of course.
84
00:12:38,375 --> 00:12:40,542
Do you, um...
need me to do anything?
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00:12:40,667 --> 00:12:41,917
No.
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00:12:42,042 --> 00:12:45,458
- She'll be all right?
- Oh, don't be an idiot, Richard.
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00:12:46,167 --> 00:12:48,583
Yes, well...
take care of yourself, darling.
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Pompous arsehole.
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00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:11,125
You should've seen him way back.
He was constantly trying to fuck me.
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00:13:11,250 --> 00:13:12,708
He has plugs now. Did you see?
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00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:15,500
- No.
- No.
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00:13:15,625 --> 00:13:16,625
Well...
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00:13:16,750 --> 00:13:18,833
No one sees
what they don't want to.
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00:13:48,958 --> 00:13:49,958
Stay with me.
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00:13:53,083 --> 00:13:54,667
I don't want to be alone.
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00:14:10,292 --> 00:14:12,333
How long have you been doing this?
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00:14:12,458 --> 00:14:13,792
Just over a year.
98
00:14:15,625 --> 00:14:17,583
What were you doing before?
99
00:14:17,708 --> 00:14:20,042
I worked at St Afra's hospital.
100
00:14:20,167 --> 00:14:21,458
Horrible place.
101
00:14:25,625 --> 00:14:27,167
Have you seen a lot of death?
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00:14:28,125 --> 00:14:29,125
Yes.
103
00:14:31,250 --> 00:14:33,042
What made you leave?
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00:14:38,042 --> 00:14:40,458
I don't know,
I just needed a change.
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00:14:42,458 --> 00:14:43,458
I dunno.
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00:14:46,875 --> 00:14:48,667
I think I was spread too thin.
107
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:54,542
And it's what God wanted.
108
00:14:54,667 --> 00:14:56,750
When he came, everything changed.
109
00:14:58,292 --> 00:15:00,500
So this is a recent conversion?
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00:15:04,792 --> 00:15:07,333
When you pray,
do you get a response?
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00:15:11,500 --> 00:15:13,083
Sometimes he talks.
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00:15:15,833 --> 00:15:16,958
You hear his voice?
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00:15:19,917 --> 00:15:21,667
Most of the time it...
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00:15:21,792 --> 00:15:25,000
It's just like he's physically...
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00:15:25,875 --> 00:15:28,500
in me or around me.
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It's how he guides me.
117
00:15:32,792 --> 00:15:35,708
Like, when he's pleased,
it's like a...
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00:15:35,833 --> 00:15:37,625
a shiver or...
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00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:40,417
sometimes it's like a pulsing.
120
00:15:42,125 --> 00:15:43,292
And it's all...
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00:15:44,125 --> 00:15:45,958
warm and good.
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And he's just there.
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00:16:03,167 --> 00:16:04,542
Nothing feels real anymore.
124
00:16:06,625 --> 00:16:09,208
Ever since I moved back here,
125
00:16:09,333 --> 00:16:11,792
I keep thinking
about that last moment
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00:16:12,583 --> 00:16:13,792
and wondering...
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00:16:15,417 --> 00:16:17,083
...what it will be like.
128
00:16:18,208 --> 00:16:20,042
What will I be looking at?
129
00:16:21,625 --> 00:16:23,667
Will there be anyone else there?
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00:16:28,750 --> 00:16:30,167
And then what?
131
00:16:32,667 --> 00:16:33,708
Nothing?
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00:16:36,708 --> 00:16:38,083
Tell me I'm wrong.
133
00:16:43,875 --> 00:16:45,125
There is more.
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00:16:46,458 --> 00:16:48,292
And not just afterwards.
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He's everywhere.
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He sees you.
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He won't let you fall.
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00:17:11,708 --> 00:17:13,250
My little saviour.
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00:19:12,083 --> 00:19:15,375
'Father, thank you.'
140
00:19:15,500 --> 00:19:18,500
And bring your hand to join...
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00:19:20,542 --> 00:19:22,125
...your right hand.
142
00:19:22,250 --> 00:19:24,917
And then draw a semi-circle
above your head.
143
00:19:26,125 --> 00:19:29,792
'Now, don't get me wrong,
palliative care is noble work.
144
00:19:31,375 --> 00:19:34,417
'But I always knew you had
something more planned for me.
145
00:19:38,958 --> 00:19:42,792
'It takes nothing special to mop up
after the decrepit and the dying.
146
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:46,250
'But to save a soul,
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'that's quite something.
148
00:19:55,875 --> 00:19:57,917
'Your presence graces the air
149
00:19:58,875 --> 00:20:01,625
'and I feel fuller of your love
than ever before.
150
00:20:04,125 --> 00:20:05,583
'More than enough to share.'
151
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:19,250
Oh.
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00:20:42,708 --> 00:20:44,000
I can see you.
153
00:20:49,583 --> 00:20:50,875
Yes?
154
00:20:52,833 --> 00:20:54,792
- Cynthia left?
- Yes, I'm Maud.
155
00:20:55,375 --> 00:20:58,125
- Carol.
- It's too late to be visiting now.
156
00:20:58,250 --> 00:20:59,958
- It...
- She's expecting me.
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00:21:04,292 --> 00:21:05,292
She's sleeping.
158
00:22:20,833 --> 00:22:23,000
Maud?
159
00:22:23,125 --> 00:22:24,542
Come and join me.
160
00:22:26,833 --> 00:22:28,625
'He ended his life last month
161
00:22:28,750 --> 00:22:31,000
'at a legalised euthanasia clinic
in Switzerland.
162
00:22:31,875 --> 00:22:34,958
'John said it was his final wish
to have a peaceful, pain-free death
163
00:22:35,083 --> 00:22:37,958
'with his family by his side.'
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00:22:38,083 --> 00:22:39,333
'Thanks, Julia.
165
00:22:39,458 --> 00:22:44,250
'Before he passed, John wrote
an open letter to MPs here in England.
166
00:22:44,375 --> 00:22:47,000
'He wanted everybody to know...'
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00:22:56,958 --> 00:22:59,667
Dear God, here is Amanda.
168
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Well, you know that.
169
00:23:02,042 --> 00:23:04,083
Thank you
for bringing us together, Lord.
170
00:23:05,375 --> 00:23:07,958
And thank you for this meal
which we gratefully receive.
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Bless Amanda's body
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which is hurting now
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00:23:17,125 --> 00:23:20,250
but has done
so many wonderful things.
174
00:23:20,375 --> 00:23:22,000
And bless her mind,
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00:23:22,125 --> 00:23:24,375
which is shrouded in darkness,
176
00:23:25,625 --> 00:23:28,083
and reach out to her
like you did to me.
177
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Amen.
178
00:23:40,333 --> 00:23:41,542
He's here?
179
00:23:52,083 --> 00:23:53,875
I feel it too.
180
00:24:51,333 --> 00:24:53,458
You look beautiful.
181
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- No!
- Yes.
182
00:26:06,375 --> 00:26:07,458
Hey.
183
00:26:09,042 --> 00:26:10,958
No, I can't tonight.
184
00:26:11,083 --> 00:26:12,542
You know where I am.
185
00:26:12,667 --> 00:26:14,167
She's all right.
186
00:26:14,292 --> 00:26:15,417
Bit weird but...
187
00:26:15,542 --> 00:26:17,458
Shh. I gotta go.
188
00:26:18,208 --> 00:26:19,625
Yeah, OK. Bye, bye.
189
00:26:23,417 --> 00:26:25,042
Maud, your face.
190
00:26:37,042 --> 00:26:39,125
Oh, shit.
191
00:26:39,250 --> 00:26:40,708
Fuck, it's all over her dressing gown.
192
00:26:40,833 --> 00:26:41,917
Shit.
193
00:26:43,750 --> 00:26:45,292
Maud, I can do it.
194
00:26:46,083 --> 00:26:49,583
- Don't let her drink too much.
- Don't worry, it's mostly for me.
195
00:26:52,125 --> 00:26:54,125
Honey, come back to me.
196
00:27:00,417 --> 00:27:02,333
'Religious themes would play
a prominent role
197
00:27:02,458 --> 00:27:04,833
'throughout Blake's career,
198
00:27:04,958 --> 00:27:07,875
'namely a rejection
of organised religion,
199
00:27:10,208 --> 00:27:14,875
'which he claimed was an ugly distortion
of a true spiritual life.'
200
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:16,042
Hm.
201
00:28:35,250 --> 00:28:36,250
Bye.
202
00:28:38,417 --> 00:28:39,458
Carol?
203
00:28:39,583 --> 00:28:40,583
Hey.
204
00:28:43,667 --> 00:28:44,875
I need to talk to you.
205
00:28:46,292 --> 00:28:47,292
Yeah?
206
00:28:51,333 --> 00:28:54,958
- What's up?
- I want you to stop seeing Amanda.
207
00:28:55,625 --> 00:28:57,792
- Huh?
- Just leave her alone.
208
00:28:57,917 --> 00:29:00,583
- Did she tell you to come after me?
- No, I'm telling you.
209
00:29:00,708 --> 00:29:02,250
It's an important time for her.
210
00:29:02,375 --> 00:29:06,000
She's got big things to deal with
and she needs to be focused.
211
00:29:06,958 --> 00:29:10,125
And I just don't think
you can fit into that anymore.
212
00:29:10,250 --> 00:29:12,125
I don't know
what you're talking about, but...
213
00:29:12,250 --> 00:29:14,500
I'm sure your patient's sex life
is none of your business.
214
00:29:14,625 --> 00:29:16,083
I know she's giving you money.
215
00:29:16,750 --> 00:29:19,042
Again, none of your fucking business.
216
00:29:19,625 --> 00:29:22,708
Look, I'm trying to be respectful.
217
00:29:22,833 --> 00:29:24,958
I didn't swear at you or anything.
218
00:29:25,083 --> 00:29:26,208
I just...
219
00:29:27,208 --> 00:29:29,833
- I just don't think it's a good idea.
- Please. Respectful?
220
00:29:30,375 --> 00:29:32,000
You just don't like
that she fucks women.
221
00:29:32,125 --> 00:29:34,083
You could have
an eight-inch cock for all I care.
222
00:29:34,208 --> 00:29:36,750
I'd still be telling you this
after the way you looked at her.
223
00:29:36,875 --> 00:29:39,208
- Whoa. What?
- What was that, by the way?
224
00:29:40,167 --> 00:29:42,958
Do you think you're too good for her?
Do you think this is a joke?
225
00:29:43,083 --> 00:29:45,083
- Of course not.
- Amanda is dying.
226
00:29:45,833 --> 00:29:48,625
I have a responsibility
to look after her.
227
00:29:49,625 --> 00:29:51,958
This is life and death.
228
00:29:52,083 --> 00:29:54,667
It's spiritual, on another level.
229
00:29:55,583 --> 00:29:58,458
No hard feelings.
I'm sure you're great in bed.
230
00:29:58,583 --> 00:30:00,500
But you're just a waste of her time
at the moment.
231
00:30:01,417 --> 00:30:03,583
Can you hear yourself?
232
00:30:03,708 --> 00:30:05,458
Maud, you're her nurse.
233
00:30:05,583 --> 00:30:08,458
She doesn't want you to see it
but she is vulnerable right now.
234
00:30:09,333 --> 00:30:12,333
And it is not right
that she spends her last days
235
00:30:12,458 --> 00:30:16,042
getting worked up about a silly girl
who doesn't care about her.
236
00:30:16,167 --> 00:30:18,042
- I care about her.
- Not enough.
237
00:30:20,250 --> 00:30:22,500
- What are you doing?
- I'm leaving.
238
00:30:22,625 --> 00:30:23,667
Oh.
239
00:30:26,208 --> 00:30:27,792
OK, so you'll do it?
240
00:30:28,750 --> 00:30:30,250
Anything you say, Maud.
241
00:30:32,667 --> 00:30:34,250
Don't tell her I told you, though.
242
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:37,292
Just, you know, make something up.
243
00:30:38,250 --> 00:30:39,625
Don't hurt her feelings.
244
00:30:40,333 --> 00:30:41,792
OK.
245
00:30:41,917 --> 00:30:43,125
OK.
246
00:30:55,208 --> 00:30:56,542
'I think it went well.
247
00:30:59,458 --> 00:31:02,500
'A whole day
and her phone has been silent.
248
00:31:04,208 --> 00:31:06,250
'It must be a relief to her too.
249
00:31:09,125 --> 00:31:11,292
'She radiates peace,
250
00:31:11,417 --> 00:31:14,833
'and I am reminded of myself
in the first flushes of your love.'
251
00:31:19,167 --> 00:31:21,042
'We don't need anyone else.'
252
00:31:37,917 --> 00:31:39,042
Katie?
253
00:31:42,750 --> 00:31:43,958
Katie!
254
00:31:44,833 --> 00:31:47,708
Katie, hey!
I thought that was you.
255
00:31:49,417 --> 00:31:51,042
How's it going? It's been ages.
256
00:31:51,667 --> 00:31:53,083
Yeah, good.
257
00:31:54,500 --> 00:31:56,417
How are you, Joy?
258
00:31:56,542 --> 00:31:59,458
Yeah, not bad, not bad.
You know, knackered.
259
00:31:59,583 --> 00:32:01,208
Got patients sleeping in corridors.
260
00:32:01,333 --> 00:32:03,750
Surgeries all double-booked.
It's a total madhouse.
261
00:32:07,625 --> 00:32:09,708
So, how's it going?
Are you taking care of yourself?
262
00:32:09,833 --> 00:32:10,833
Yeah.
263
00:32:10,958 --> 00:32:12,750
We all thought you must've left town.
264
00:32:12,875 --> 00:32:14,458
No one sees you
out and about anymore.
265
00:32:15,542 --> 00:32:17,625
- I've been around.
- Oh, yeah?
266
00:32:17,750 --> 00:32:20,167
- What are you up to?
- I'm a private carer.
267
00:32:21,375 --> 00:32:22,958
You're still nursing?
268
00:32:23,083 --> 00:32:24,625
- What?
- Nothing.
269
00:32:24,750 --> 00:32:26,083
Just surprised. I mean...
270
00:32:27,125 --> 00:32:29,625
- Where are you doing it? Who with?
- A private agency.
271
00:32:29,750 --> 00:32:31,583
- And they know what happened?
- Yes.
272
00:32:34,417 --> 00:32:36,500
Well, I've got to go.
It was nice to see you, Joy.
273
00:32:38,958 --> 00:32:40,000
Katie.
274
00:32:49,042 --> 00:32:50,792
Take my number, yeah?
275
00:32:50,917 --> 00:32:51,958
What?
276
00:32:52,625 --> 00:32:56,042
If you ever want to talk
or get a drink or... anything.
277
00:33:14,375 --> 00:33:15,667
That one there.
278
00:33:19,375 --> 00:33:21,042
Yes, and then that one.
279
00:33:30,625 --> 00:33:32,250
Uh, you can't do that.
280
00:33:32,375 --> 00:33:33,333
What?
281
00:33:33,958 --> 00:33:37,167
You... you slipped those cards in.
282
00:33:37,833 --> 00:33:38,833
Did I?
283
00:33:42,833 --> 00:33:44,208
It's no fun if you cheat.
284
00:33:44,333 --> 00:33:47,083
Which one was it?
Hm, that one.
285
00:33:49,833 --> 00:33:51,625
Can you give me a moment?
286
00:33:51,750 --> 00:33:53,792
- Uh, yes.
- And take that away.
287
00:33:56,375 --> 00:33:59,000
- Ooh, can I have a cup of tea?
- Of course.
288
00:34:01,750 --> 00:34:03,000
Hello.
289
00:34:04,042 --> 00:34:06,208
I didn't expect to hear from you.
290
00:34:16,625 --> 00:34:18,042
What do you mean?
291
00:34:20,542 --> 00:34:21,542
Why?
292
00:34:38,500 --> 00:34:39,958
There you go.
293
00:34:43,917 --> 00:34:47,083
You know, I've been thinking,
it might be nice to go out sometime,
294
00:34:47,208 --> 00:34:48,833
to the theatre or something.
295
00:34:49,417 --> 00:34:53,250
I would have no clue what to see
but I'm sure you can suggest something.
296
00:34:54,583 --> 00:34:57,250
- And maybe after I leave...
- I want to go to bed.
297
00:35:00,208 --> 00:35:01,583
It's five o'clock.
298
00:35:02,042 --> 00:35:04,042
I will go to bed
when I damn well like.
299
00:35:06,042 --> 00:35:07,458
Yes, of course.
300
00:35:08,625 --> 00:35:10,125
Now is not the time.
301
00:36:39,042 --> 00:36:40,375
I need you to go into town.
302
00:36:40,500 --> 00:36:41,500
Yeah?
303
00:36:41,625 --> 00:36:44,250
To pick up some things for tonight.
I'll make a list.
304
00:36:45,083 --> 00:36:46,333
OK, no problem.
305
00:37:28,958 --> 00:37:31,917
Oh, yes!
306
00:37:52,083 --> 00:37:54,333
- Is it ready?
- I'm just lighting the candles.
307
00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:07,250
Plates.
308
00:38:09,958 --> 00:38:11,167
Get the lights.
309
00:38:18,458 --> 00:38:22,875
♪ Happy birthday to you
310
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:27,083
♪ Happy birthday to you
311
00:38:27,208 --> 00:38:32,083
♪ Happy birthday, dear Amanda
312
00:38:32,208 --> 00:38:36,167
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
313
00:38:44,167 --> 00:38:46,000
- Lights.
- Make a wish.
314
00:39:00,875 --> 00:39:03,375
So, Carol,
how did you and Mandy meet?
315
00:39:03,500 --> 00:39:04,833
We met online.
316
00:39:04,958 --> 00:39:06,583
Ah, so now you have
a ménage à trois.
317
00:39:06,708 --> 00:39:09,125
Hardly. Maud doesn't like Carol.
318
00:39:10,042 --> 00:39:14,250
It's funny, I can't figure out
if she's a bigot or if she's just jealous.
319
00:39:14,375 --> 00:39:18,458
She went sneaking behind my back
to try to scare Carol away.
320
00:39:20,250 --> 00:39:24,125
To save my soul,
if I understand correctly.
321
00:39:26,875 --> 00:39:28,167
Excuse me.
322
00:39:28,292 --> 00:39:31,042
Don't run away.
I'm talking to you.
323
00:39:31,167 --> 00:39:34,083
Maud is my saviour, you see.
324
00:39:34,958 --> 00:39:38,875
She's been looking out for me
in more ways than one, but...
325
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,042
you got a little carried away,
didn't you?
326
00:39:43,625 --> 00:39:44,792
So, what is it?
327
00:39:47,458 --> 00:39:48,625
Am I indecent?
328
00:39:49,333 --> 00:39:50,875
No, you're lost.
329
00:39:52,833 --> 00:39:55,208
Richard, want to show us
some moves?
330
00:40:31,250 --> 00:40:33,208
There's my little saint.
331
00:40:35,917 --> 00:40:38,000
Oh, no, no.
Sweetheart, no, no, no.
332
00:40:38,125 --> 00:40:41,375
You know you shouldn't take
anything I say seriously.
333
00:40:41,500 --> 00:40:43,208
I just wanna see you loosen up.
334
00:40:43,333 --> 00:40:45,375
You are a beautiful young woman,
335
00:40:45,500 --> 00:40:48,208
and you should have some fun
while you still can.
336
00:40:49,792 --> 00:40:52,375
I've got more important things
on my mind.
337
00:40:52,500 --> 00:40:54,000
Oh, yes, of course.
338
00:40:54,125 --> 00:40:57,833
How could mere human frivolity
possibly compete
339
00:40:57,958 --> 00:41:00,333
with the heavenly Father's
warm heart pulsing...
340
00:41:02,375 --> 00:41:03,875
Let's go. Let's go.
341
00:41:20,542 --> 00:41:22,250
Maybe if you just let me talk to her.
342
00:41:22,375 --> 00:41:24,083
No, absolutely not.
343
00:41:24,208 --> 00:41:26,542
You should be thankful
she isn't pressing charges.
344
00:41:29,708 --> 00:41:32,750
Ms Köhl expressed
some other concerns.
345
00:41:32,875 --> 00:41:34,000
Is everything all right?
346
00:41:38,750 --> 00:41:39,792
I'm fine.
347
00:42:56,792 --> 00:42:58,708
'God,
348
00:42:58,833 --> 00:43:00,958
'all I feel of you now is this pain.
349
00:43:02,083 --> 00:43:03,750
'A gnawing burning.
350
00:43:05,875 --> 00:43:08,958
'Maybe it's ulcers or cancer
351
00:43:09,083 --> 00:43:10,750
'or appendicitis.
352
00:43:11,667 --> 00:43:13,167
'If you're trying
to teach me something,
353
00:43:14,458 --> 00:43:15,958
'I can't see what it is.
354
00:43:37,542 --> 00:43:40,208
'Quite frankly
it all just seems such a waste.
355
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:45,583
'I was ready and open and alive
356
00:43:45,708 --> 00:43:47,833
'and this is my reward:
357
00:43:47,958 --> 00:43:49,125
'unemployable,
358
00:43:50,458 --> 00:43:51,583
'unoccupied.
359
00:43:57,375 --> 00:43:59,458
'Perhaps you weren't as wise
as I thought.
360
00:44:01,292 --> 00:44:03,417
'Perhaps I wasn't paying
enough attention.
361
00:44:15,417 --> 00:44:18,667
'I can't help but feel
an act of spite has occurred.
362
00:44:28,375 --> 00:44:31,167
'If this is how you treat
your most loyal subjects
363
00:44:33,125 --> 00:44:35,792
'I shudder to think
what awaits those who shun you.'
364
00:46:18,250 --> 00:46:19,292
Yes, that's it.
365
00:46:19,417 --> 00:46:20,500
Yeah, yeah.
366
00:46:21,458 --> 00:46:23,167
Oh, yes. Oh!
367
00:46:25,917 --> 00:46:27,292
- Not yet.
- Oh!
368
00:46:27,417 --> 00:46:28,708
Oh, God!
369
00:46:28,833 --> 00:46:30,458
Oh, sorry. Oh.
370
00:46:43,500 --> 00:46:44,583
See you later.
371
00:47:43,292 --> 00:47:45,250
Hey, Joy, it's Katie.
372
00:47:47,125 --> 00:47:51,792
Hey. Yeah, I was just wondering
if you wanna go for that drink,
373
00:47:51,917 --> 00:47:55,625
you know, have that chat
and just hang out,
374
00:47:55,750 --> 00:47:57,625
like you said, to chat.
375
00:47:59,667 --> 00:48:01,042
Cool. Great.
376
00:48:01,167 --> 00:48:02,458
That's great.
377
00:48:03,083 --> 00:48:05,250
Well, you know,
if I'm honest with you,
378
00:48:05,375 --> 00:48:08,750
I did think it was kind of weird
when I saw you and you suggested it,
379
00:48:08,875 --> 00:48:11,708
just because you never seemed
to like me that much.
380
00:48:13,583 --> 00:48:14,583
No...
381
00:48:14,708 --> 00:48:18,208
No, no, no, no.
I didn't... I didn't mean...
382
00:48:18,333 --> 00:48:19,500
Don't be like that.
383
00:48:21,167 --> 00:48:24,625
Well, I'm just at the Star
at the moment with some friends,
384
00:48:24,750 --> 00:48:27,750
but I think they're heading off soon
but I'm gonna hang around a bit.
385
00:48:27,875 --> 00:48:29,542
Oh, sorry.
386
00:48:30,792 --> 00:48:31,875
Yeah, of course.
387
00:48:33,458 --> 00:48:36,125
In that case, my apologies.
388
00:48:36,250 --> 00:48:38,917
I'm being stupid so, uh, bye.
389
00:49:12,000 --> 00:49:13,375
Oh, careful.
390
00:49:23,458 --> 00:49:24,875
You owe me a drink.
391
00:49:55,500 --> 00:49:57,083
Is everything OK?
392
00:49:58,042 --> 00:49:59,667
Shh, shh, shh.
393
00:50:01,375 --> 00:50:03,167
Shh, it's OK. It's OK.
394
00:50:05,250 --> 00:50:06,250
Shh.
395
00:50:08,292 --> 00:50:09,292
Come on.
396
00:50:10,458 --> 00:50:12,000
- Easy.
- No.
397
00:50:12,125 --> 00:50:13,250
Easy!
398
00:50:44,708 --> 00:50:45,917
I remember you, you know.
399
00:50:48,125 --> 00:50:50,083
You used to be out all the time.
400
00:50:50,958 --> 00:50:52,083
While back.
401
00:50:53,375 --> 00:50:54,583
I think...
402
00:50:55,958 --> 00:50:57,792
you and my mate Tommy had it off.
403
00:50:59,750 --> 00:51:02,375
Ah, I remember you.
404
00:51:02,500 --> 00:51:05,000
A lovely, lovely little nursey, hey?
405
00:52:04,417 --> 00:52:05,875
I did everything.
406
00:52:07,750 --> 00:52:09,792
Everything.
I changed, didn't I?
407
00:52:12,333 --> 00:52:14,125
I thought I did
what you told me to do.
408
00:52:14,250 --> 00:52:15,250
Didn't I?
409
00:52:17,375 --> 00:52:18,667
Please.
410
00:52:18,792 --> 00:52:20,792
Please don't let me fall again.
411
00:52:22,292 --> 00:52:23,500
I'm begging you.
412
00:52:24,958 --> 00:52:26,167
I'll do anything.
413
00:52:28,250 --> 00:52:30,375
Please guide me.
414
00:54:32,042 --> 00:54:34,792
'Revelation, and just in time.
415
00:54:37,667 --> 00:54:40,667
'Oh, Lord, your mercy
knows no bounds.
416
00:54:40,792 --> 00:54:42,958
'For shame
that I almost fell so easily.'
417
00:56:35,042 --> 00:56:37,000
'I should have expected resistance.
418
00:56:38,750 --> 00:56:40,958
'Nothing worthwhile comes easily.
419
00:57:03,500 --> 00:57:04,917
'Amanda.
420
00:57:05,042 --> 00:57:07,250
'Amanda, Amanda.
421
00:57:07,375 --> 00:57:08,875
'You called to me, Amanda.
422
00:57:10,125 --> 00:57:12,042
'It was no small thing.
423
00:57:12,167 --> 00:57:13,667
'It meant something.
424
00:57:16,750 --> 00:57:18,250
'Never waste your pain.
425
00:57:19,208 --> 00:57:21,625
'Never waste your pain.'
426
00:58:30,333 --> 00:58:32,792
Beautiful.
427
00:58:32,917 --> 00:58:33,917
Mm.
428
00:58:37,333 --> 00:58:39,917
- Do you mind if I sit?
- Hm? Course not.
429
00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:49,375
Oh, you don't work at St Afra's,
do you?
430
00:58:49,500 --> 00:58:50,958
Oh, no, no.
I'm a private carer.
431
00:58:51,583 --> 00:58:53,125
Oh, right.
432
00:58:53,833 --> 00:58:57,375
I have a friend who works at St Afra's
and I wondered if you knew her.
433
00:58:57,500 --> 00:58:59,333
Oh, their uniform is blue.
434
00:59:00,250 --> 00:59:03,333
I honestly have so much respect
435
00:59:03,458 --> 00:59:05,833
for anyone in the medical profession.
436
00:59:05,958 --> 00:59:07,333
Like, any area.
437
00:59:08,208 --> 00:59:10,833
I really think
it's the most important thing
438
00:59:10,958 --> 00:59:13,042
you can do with your life, almost.
439
00:59:14,208 --> 00:59:16,417
Thank you.
That's so sweet.
440
00:59:16,542 --> 00:59:19,625
Yeah, it can be really rewarding.
441
00:59:19,750 --> 00:59:21,583
Not all that glamorous, but yeah.
442
00:59:22,667 --> 00:59:25,333
- I love it.
- I bet you get no time for yourself.
443
00:59:26,125 --> 00:59:28,375
Oh, it's fine. I have my own life.
444
00:59:28,500 --> 00:59:30,125
My own things.
445
00:59:30,250 --> 00:59:31,792
Got choir practice.
446
00:59:35,208 --> 00:59:38,417
This person you're with at the moment,
what's wrong with them?
447
00:59:38,542 --> 00:59:39,667
Oh, I'm...
448
00:59:41,167 --> 00:59:43,792
...not really supposed
to discuss the details.
449
00:59:43,917 --> 00:59:46,083
But you have a good relationship?
You get on with them?
450
00:59:46,208 --> 00:59:47,292
Mm, really well.
451
00:59:48,250 --> 00:59:51,250
I'm with a lovely lady at the minute.
We're good pals.
452
00:59:53,500 --> 00:59:56,042
That's one of the things
I love about the job.
453
00:59:56,167 --> 01:00:00,333
You find yourself quickly building
these quite meaningful relationships
454
01:00:00,458 --> 01:00:04,000
and, you know,
you're often right there
455
01:00:04,125 --> 01:00:06,583
at a very important time
in people's lives.
456
01:00:08,625 --> 01:00:10,167
Yeah.
457
01:00:10,292 --> 01:00:12,500
Although that sometimes
makes things harder in the end.
458
01:00:12,625 --> 01:00:13,875
When you have to leave?
459
01:00:14,500 --> 01:00:15,625
No, when they die.
460
01:00:16,917 --> 01:00:20,875
I don't think I'll be with this one
much longer to be honest with you.
461
01:00:21,000 --> 01:00:22,375
Sadly...
462
01:00:22,500 --> 01:00:25,167
that, as they say,
463
01:00:25,292 --> 01:00:26,958
is how the cookie crumbles.
464
01:00:31,500 --> 01:00:35,167
Oh, I'm Esther, by the way.
What's your name?
465
01:00:45,667 --> 01:00:47,250
'What if I'm getting it all wrong?
466
01:00:49,333 --> 01:00:53,000
'What if you are smirking
or indifferent
467
01:00:53,125 --> 01:00:55,667
'or think me a clueless idiot
like that stupid woman?
468
01:00:58,833 --> 01:01:01,083
'Is that how Amanda
saw me all along?'
469
01:02:59,292 --> 01:03:00,750
How will I know what to do?
470
01:04:45,208 --> 01:04:46,250
Katie?
471
01:04:50,208 --> 01:04:51,458
Katie, it's Joy.
472
01:04:59,000 --> 01:05:00,375
There you are.
473
01:05:00,500 --> 01:05:02,333
Oh, sorry.
Did I get you out of bed?
474
01:05:03,875 --> 01:05:06,292
- Mind if I come in?
- I'm busy.
475
01:05:06,417 --> 01:05:08,792
I'll be quick, I promise.
I'm just on my way to work.
476
01:05:11,833 --> 01:05:13,042
Thanks, love.
477
01:05:15,250 --> 01:05:16,250
Oh.
478
01:05:17,958 --> 01:05:19,375
This is nice.
479
01:05:22,000 --> 01:05:23,750
Cor, you ain't half tidy, are you?
480
01:05:28,917 --> 01:05:30,958
I hope you don't mind.
I got your address from work.
481
01:05:31,083 --> 01:05:32,792
Just wanted to see how you are.
482
01:05:38,167 --> 01:05:40,458
Oh, this is cool.
483
01:05:41,167 --> 01:05:42,583
I like all this.
484
01:05:43,958 --> 01:05:45,792
Sorry I couldn't see you
the other night.
485
01:05:45,917 --> 01:05:49,333
I was so shattered, I don't think
I would've been much fun.
486
01:05:49,458 --> 01:05:51,000
I tried to call
but you didn't pick up.
487
01:05:52,958 --> 01:05:54,542
Want a ciggie?
488
01:05:59,208 --> 01:06:00,750
How's work going?
489
01:06:02,417 --> 01:06:04,750
Are you not
with a patient at the moment?
490
01:06:12,958 --> 01:06:15,625
I've been feeling bad about the way
I reacted last time I saw you.
491
01:06:16,583 --> 01:06:18,042
I'm sure you're doing a great job.
492
01:06:18,833 --> 01:06:20,042
You always did.
493
01:06:20,167 --> 01:06:22,042
And I know you put
a lot of pressure on yourself.
494
01:06:24,500 --> 01:06:28,250
What happened before,
it wasn't your fault. I know that.
495
01:06:29,708 --> 01:06:31,042
You do too, right?
496
01:06:38,542 --> 01:06:40,333
What's going on, Katie?
497
01:06:42,875 --> 01:06:44,250
Come on, you can tell me.
498
01:06:46,208 --> 01:06:49,417
Look, I know it's a bit late now,
but I wanted to tell you.
499
01:06:50,333 --> 01:06:52,792
We should have been there
before it all happened.
500
01:06:54,042 --> 01:06:56,250
We could see
you were struggling for a while.
501
01:07:13,333 --> 01:07:16,167
I know it feels like everyone's
in their own little bubble.
502
01:07:19,083 --> 01:07:20,667
But it does help to share.
503
01:07:39,667 --> 01:07:42,042
May the Lord bless
and keep you, Joy.
504
01:07:43,208 --> 01:07:44,292
You what?
505
01:07:45,375 --> 01:07:47,417
It was sweet of you to come
but you mustn't worry.
506
01:07:48,417 --> 01:07:50,917
You're right,
back then I was so lost.
507
01:07:52,042 --> 01:07:54,833
But now I am transformed
508
01:07:54,958 --> 01:07:57,875
and soon everyone will see.
509
01:08:00,000 --> 01:08:02,583
Right. Well, that's good.
510
01:08:02,708 --> 01:08:05,458
Thank you, Joy.
Thank you for coming.
511
01:08:10,958 --> 01:08:13,125
Oh? Oh, right.
512
01:08:16,125 --> 01:08:17,542
Are you sure you're OK, then?
513
01:08:20,083 --> 01:08:21,833
Oh, fuck, I should go, actually.
514
01:08:28,708 --> 01:08:30,875
I'm gonna come back later, all right?
515
01:08:31,000 --> 01:08:32,083
All right.
516
01:08:32,208 --> 01:08:34,375
I'm really glad
things are looking up.
517
01:08:35,792 --> 01:08:36,792
See you later.
518
01:11:48,792 --> 01:11:51,042
I'm so sorry.
519
01:11:51,167 --> 01:11:53,833
I was unkind to you.
520
01:11:53,958 --> 01:11:57,083
You made me think of things
I didn't want to.
521
01:12:00,167 --> 01:12:01,458
It's all right.
522
01:12:02,375 --> 01:12:04,542
- No.
- It is, Amanda.
523
01:12:05,542 --> 01:12:07,708
The Lord forgives that
which is said in anger.
524
01:12:08,917 --> 01:12:11,000
He knows your heart.
525
01:12:11,125 --> 01:12:12,500
The Lord.
526
01:12:12,625 --> 01:12:13,875
Yes, God.
527
01:12:15,625 --> 01:12:17,500
God sent me to you.
528
01:12:19,542 --> 01:12:21,000
He forgives everything.
529
01:12:22,625 --> 01:12:24,667
You only have to ask.
530
01:12:32,125 --> 01:12:33,500
Heavenly Father...
531
01:12:33,625 --> 01:12:35,542
- No, no.
- Bless this woman in her pain.
532
01:12:36,125 --> 01:12:38,875
No, none of that nonsense.
533
01:12:45,708 --> 01:12:46,708
Amanda?
534
01:12:54,208 --> 01:12:57,792
You must be the loneliest girl
I've ever seen.
535
01:13:01,000 --> 01:13:02,417
I'm here, Amanda.
536
01:13:04,042 --> 01:13:05,167
I am not alone.
537
01:13:06,833 --> 01:13:08,083
And neither are you.
538
01:13:08,208 --> 01:13:09,458
No.
539
01:13:09,583 --> 01:13:12,208
Snap out of it, honey.
540
01:13:17,417 --> 01:13:18,625
He isn't real.
541
01:13:20,042 --> 01:13:21,667
You must know that.
542
01:13:24,542 --> 01:13:25,708
No.
543
01:13:25,833 --> 01:13:28,208
You felt him too, remember?
544
01:13:28,333 --> 01:13:30,167
We both did.
545
01:13:30,292 --> 01:13:31,375
No, honey.
546
01:13:32,792 --> 01:13:34,458
I didn't.
547
01:13:36,708 --> 01:13:38,333
That's not true.
548
01:13:40,292 --> 01:13:43,875
You have no idea
how dull it is to be dying.
549
01:13:49,208 --> 01:13:54,292
I hate to be the one to break it to you
but it's just you and me here.
550
01:13:58,000 --> 01:14:00,333
Nothing you do matters.
551
01:14:10,333 --> 01:14:12,708
Well, that was easy.
552
01:14:18,250 --> 01:14:19,458
Devil.
553
01:14:29,042 --> 01:14:32,167
Take responsibility for your actions.
554
01:14:32,292 --> 01:14:35,542
You came back here
because you are alone.
555
01:14:35,667 --> 01:14:37,875
If you were a true believer,
He would be enough
556
01:14:38,000 --> 01:14:41,958
but it's clear now
you are as weak as your faith.
557
01:17:14,458 --> 01:17:17,667
♪ I saw the light
558
01:17:18,833 --> 01:17:21,917
♪ I saw the light
559
01:17:23,708 --> 01:17:25,292
♪ No more...
560
01:17:34,250 --> 01:17:37,125
♪ I'm so happy
561
01:17:40,750 --> 01:17:43,708
♪ No sorrow in sight
562
01:17:46,292 --> 01:17:49,083
♪ Praise the Lord
563
01:17:50,833 --> 01:17:52,333
♪ I saw... ♪
564
01:18:36,125 --> 01:18:38,250
- Somebody stop her.
- Hey, love!
565
01:18:40,333 --> 01:18:42,458
- Oh, my God!
- No, no, no, don't!
566
01:19:28,940 --> 01:19:33,940
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