1 00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:07,468 What up, fam?! It's the first day 2 00:00:07,551 --> 00:00:09,052 back at Fairfax Middle School, 3 00:00:09,136 --> 00:00:12,556 and the car pool red carpet is popping! 4 00:00:12,639 --> 00:00:15,058 I'm your host, Jules. With me, as always, 5 00:00:15,142 --> 00:00:17,895 is the flawless 'Manda. How was your summer, girl? 6 00:00:17,978 --> 00:00:19,772 Pretty litty! 7 00:00:19,855 --> 00:00:23,358 Yep, my sister went to rehab, so I got the upstairs room. 8 00:00:23,442 --> 00:00:25,319 Save it for your Snap Story, bitch, 9 00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:27,821 'cause here comes Derica, Benny and Truman. 10 00:00:27,905 --> 00:00:29,114 - [cheering] - Ah, these fits. 11 00:00:29,198 --> 00:00:31,742 So playful. So gritty. So brave. 12 00:00:31,825 --> 00:00:33,452 ['Manda] Derica and Benny are pretty chill, 13 00:00:33,535 --> 00:00:35,829 but Truman can go fuck himself for not inviting me 14 00:00:35,913 --> 00:00:37,122 to his go-kart birthday party. 15 00:00:37,206 --> 00:00:39,374 Had to find out about it on Insta like a peasant. 16 00:00:39,458 --> 00:00:40,751 [chuckles] Sorry to cut you off again, 'Manda, 17 00:00:40,834 --> 00:00:43,128 - but no one gives a shit. - [engine revving] 18 00:00:43,170 --> 00:00:46,089 And OMG, there's mega influencer Melody Harper. 19 00:00:46,173 --> 00:00:48,383 Givenchy from head to toe. 20 00:00:48,467 --> 00:00:49,676 Leave it to Melody 21 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:51,762 to push the boundaries of school attire. 22 00:00:51,845 --> 00:00:54,973 - So chic. So bold. So brave. - [boy] Melody! 23 00:00:55,057 --> 00:00:56,850 Melody, please, notice me! 24 00:00:56,934 --> 00:00:58,811 [Jules] [laughs] Classic zap. 25 00:00:58,894 --> 00:01:00,813 Anyway, we got another car pulling up. 26 00:01:00,896 --> 00:01:02,397 Who's this now, Miss 'Manda? 27 00:01:02,481 --> 00:01:06,568 Ladies and gentlemen, we have got a new student, uh... 28 00:01:06,652 --> 00:01:08,946 Kip, where the hell is the card for this kid? 29 00:01:09,029 --> 00:01:11,990 - Dale Rubin, and... Oh, my God. - [record scratches] 30 00:01:12,074 --> 00:01:14,535 Yep, he's kissing his dad on the lips. 31 00:01:14,660 --> 00:01:17,454 Someone put a gun in my mouth and pull the trigger. 32 00:01:17,538 --> 00:01:19,414 [chuckles] I am in shock! 33 00:01:19,498 --> 00:01:21,500 Showing up as a total fucking loser 34 00:01:21,625 --> 00:01:22,835 on the first day of school? 35 00:01:22,918 --> 00:01:25,462 Now, that is brave. 36 00:01:25,546 --> 00:01:27,506 ♪ Oh... ♪ 37 00:01:27,589 --> 00:01:29,633 - ♪ Waitin' for the... ♪ - ♪ Drop ♪ 38 00:01:29,716 --> 00:01:31,218 - ♪ Waitin' for... ♪ - ♪ The drop ♪ 39 00:01:31,301 --> 00:01:34,263 - ♪ Waitin' for the ♪ - ♪ Oh... ♪ 40 00:01:34,346 --> 00:01:36,223 ♪ Waitin' for the ♪♪ 41 00:01:37,474 --> 00:01:39,059 - [whistle blows] - [girl whoops] 42 00:01:39,142 --> 00:01:40,185 [grunting] 43 00:01:40,269 --> 00:01:42,104 [girl screams] 44 00:01:43,105 --> 00:01:45,232 Lights out, fish! 45 00:01:46,191 --> 00:01:48,235 [grunts] Damn, Derica! 46 00:01:48,318 --> 00:01:49,778 Prisonball is just a game. 47 00:01:49,862 --> 00:01:51,113 Dale! Moneyball! 48 00:01:51,196 --> 00:01:54,283 - Center court! - On it. [panting] 49 00:01:54,366 --> 00:01:56,952 - [♪ All-4-One: "I Swear"] - Whoa. 50 00:01:57,035 --> 00:01:59,788 - ♪ And I swear ♪ - ♪ I swear ♪ 51 00:01:59,872 --> 00:02:02,749 ♪ By the moon and the stars ♪ 52 00:02:02,833 --> 00:02:04,751 ♪ In the sky ♪ 53 00:02:04,835 --> 00:02:09,381 - ♪ I'll be there ♪ - ♪ I'll be there ♪ 54 00:02:09,464 --> 00:02:12,092 ♪ I swear ♪♪ 55 00:02:12,175 --> 00:02:14,720 Hey. New kid, right? I'm Lily. 56 00:02:14,803 --> 00:02:17,264 Dale. I just moved here from Oregon. 57 00:02:17,347 --> 00:02:19,683 No way. My fam always vacays in Bend. 58 00:02:19,766 --> 00:02:21,143 Ugh, we love skiing 59 00:02:21,226 --> 00:02:22,686 - at Mount Bachelor. Yes! - Mount Bachelor. 60 00:02:22,769 --> 00:02:24,938 - [laughs] Do you mind if I, uh...? - Mm-hmm. 61 00:02:25,022 --> 00:02:26,481 Thanks. [chuckles] 62 00:02:26,565 --> 00:02:27,941 - [kids laugh] - Gotcha! [chuckles] 63 00:02:28,025 --> 00:02:29,192 [Derica] Damn it, Dale! 64 00:02:29,276 --> 00:02:31,236 You walked right into that thirst trap. 65 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:34,239 Hey! I saw that, Louis! Over the line! 66 00:02:34,323 --> 00:02:35,741 Guys, I think I'm in love. 67 00:02:35,824 --> 00:02:37,784 Bruh, it's the first day of seventh grade, 68 00:02:37,868 --> 00:02:39,369 and you already wifed up? 69 00:02:39,453 --> 00:02:41,663 I'm gonna ask her if she wants to go hiking this weekend 70 00:02:41,747 --> 00:02:43,457 since you guys never want to come. 71 00:02:43,498 --> 00:02:46,251 It's nothing personal, Dale. Nature just fucking sucks. 72 00:02:46,335 --> 00:02:47,461 [fire alarm ringing] 73 00:02:49,630 --> 00:02:51,840 - [blows whistle] - Everyone! Get your asses 74 00:02:51,924 --> 00:02:54,760 to the auditorium right now! 75 00:02:54,843 --> 00:02:56,219 [indistinct chatter] 76 00:02:56,303 --> 00:02:58,055 Penis! 77 00:02:58,138 --> 00:03:01,224 [laughs] All right, you got me. Settle down, now. 78 00:03:01,308 --> 00:03:03,852 Now, normally I don't condone pulling the fire alarm, 79 00:03:03,936 --> 00:03:05,437 but today, we have what we call 80 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:07,481 a social media emergency. 81 00:03:07,564 --> 00:03:09,816 In my 38 years of tenured education, 82 00:03:09,900 --> 00:03:11,234 I have never been this excited. 83 00:03:11,318 --> 00:03:12,611 Fairfax Middle School's 84 00:03:12,694 --> 00:03:15,322 very own wellness influencer, Melody Harper, 85 00:03:15,405 --> 00:03:18,241 has just been verified on Instagram, 86 00:03:18,325 --> 00:03:19,993 - y'all! - [cheering] - [whistle blowing] 87 00:03:20,077 --> 00:03:21,495 [playing upbeat march] 88 00:03:26,500 --> 00:03:28,293 Hey, guys, what's "verified" mean? 89 00:03:28,377 --> 00:03:32,047 Dude, it's like the Nobel Prize but for dopeness. 90 00:03:32,130 --> 00:03:33,924 - [band stops playing] - That's right, 91 00:03:34,007 --> 00:03:35,926 I'm offish verified! 92 00:03:36,009 --> 00:03:37,970 And to celebrate the best day of my life, 93 00:03:38,053 --> 00:03:39,346 I'm throwing a pool party 94 00:03:39,429 --> 00:03:41,014 at the mansion I just bought with my YouTube money. 95 00:03:41,098 --> 00:03:42,391 - [cheering] - Lucky for you guys, 96 00:03:42,474 --> 00:03:45,602 my parents are making me invite the whole school. 97 00:03:45,686 --> 00:03:47,229 [cheering continues] 98 00:03:47,312 --> 00:03:49,189 Holy shit. 99 00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:51,483 [chuckles] Oh, honey, cancel our plans on Saturday. 100 00:03:51,566 --> 00:03:53,026 I said cancel them, woman! 101 00:03:53,110 --> 00:03:55,696 My best friends at Nabisco and Puma will be cosponsoring. 102 00:03:55,779 --> 00:03:58,657 There's gonna be installations, activations and makeup stations. 103 00:03:58,740 --> 00:04:00,534 [screams] 104 00:04:00,617 --> 00:04:03,328 Think of the gift bags, man! 105 00:04:03,412 --> 00:04:05,247 We're going to Melody's house?! Oh, my God. 106 00:04:05,330 --> 00:04:07,374 - I got to figure out what I'm gonna wear. - [Melody] Now, 107 00:04:07,457 --> 00:04:09,960 obviously, I don't want losers and millennials coming, 108 00:04:10,043 --> 00:04:13,422 so I'm implementing a 100-follower minimum to get in. 109 00:04:13,505 --> 00:04:15,841 So get your suits and spray tans ready, y'all, 110 00:04:15,924 --> 00:04:18,760 'cause this party's gonna be lit as fuck. 111 00:04:18,844 --> 00:04:20,220 - [cheering] - [feedback screeches] 112 00:04:20,303 --> 00:04:21,722 Y'all heard the girl. 113 00:04:21,805 --> 00:04:24,474 100 followers or you ain't getting in. 114 00:04:24,558 --> 00:04:25,976 ♪ Let's go ♪♪ 115 00:04:26,059 --> 00:04:27,436 Hey, Dale. 116 00:04:27,519 --> 00:04:29,813 You going to Melody's pool party this weekend? 117 00:04:29,896 --> 00:04:31,732 Hey. Hi. Uh, of course. 118 00:04:31,815 --> 00:04:33,567 I totally have a hundred followers. 119 00:04:33,650 --> 00:04:35,318 They're the best, so... 120 00:04:35,402 --> 00:04:37,696 Sweet. What's your handle? I'll follow you. 121 00:04:37,779 --> 00:04:39,573 My handle? My handle is, um... 122 00:04:39,656 --> 00:04:41,366 You know, it's funny you should ask. 123 00:04:41,450 --> 00:04:43,994 - I'm actually between handles right now. - [Cody laughs] 124 00:04:44,077 --> 00:04:45,704 What's going on, babe? I thought about you 125 00:04:45,787 --> 00:04:47,456 all friggin' Spanish class. 126 00:04:47,539 --> 00:04:49,541 - Quick selfie! - [camera clicks] 127 00:04:49,624 --> 00:04:51,626 You must be Dale. I saw you kiss your dad 128 00:04:51,710 --> 00:04:53,086 in the car pool line this morning. 129 00:04:53,170 --> 00:04:55,714 I just want you to know I love my dad, too. 130 00:04:55,797 --> 00:04:59,134 Cody Herschiser. Leader of The Triangle. 131 00:04:59,217 --> 00:05:04,097 We have 25,000 subscribers cross-platform. 132 00:05:04,181 --> 00:05:05,348 Thank you. 133 00:05:05,432 --> 00:05:07,142 That's Shu. This is Cubby. 134 00:05:07,225 --> 00:05:09,561 Our crew was founded on three pillars: 135 00:05:09,644 --> 00:05:13,440 pranks, trick shots and a charitable component. 136 00:05:13,523 --> 00:05:15,358 Shu, why don't you give 'em a taste! 137 00:05:15,442 --> 00:05:17,027 [exclaiming] 138 00:05:21,281 --> 00:05:23,033 [coos] What the fuck! 139 00:05:24,534 --> 00:05:26,578 [Cody] What the hell? 140 00:05:28,622 --> 00:05:29,748 And boom! 141 00:05:29,831 --> 00:05:32,959 We just donated 20 bucks to Planned Parenthood 142 00:05:33,043 --> 00:05:34,753 - in your name. - Whoa. 143 00:05:34,836 --> 00:05:37,005 The charitable component. 144 00:05:37,089 --> 00:05:40,300 Pretty awesome, huh? And it's a tax write-off. 145 00:05:41,885 --> 00:05:43,845 Come on, babe. We're gonna be late for English. 146 00:05:43,929 --> 00:05:47,557 I am super psyched to unpack The House on Mango Street. 147 00:05:47,641 --> 00:05:49,726 Bye, Dale. See you at Melody's. 148 00:05:51,561 --> 00:05:53,688 [panting] Guys, code red. 149 00:05:53,772 --> 00:05:54,940 It's an emergency. 150 00:05:55,023 --> 00:05:56,817 I don't have a hundred followers. 151 00:05:56,900 --> 00:05:58,193 I don't even have Instagram. 152 00:05:58,276 --> 00:06:00,237 I told Lily I'd see her at Melody's party. 153 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:01,738 If I don't get a hundred followers, 154 00:06:01,822 --> 00:06:03,031 she's gonna think I'm a giant loser, 155 00:06:03,115 --> 00:06:04,282 she'll never fall in love with me, 156 00:06:04,366 --> 00:06:06,326 and we'll never birth a baby deer together. 157 00:06:06,409 --> 00:06:08,662 Man, I could get you to a hundred followers, a'ight? 158 00:06:08,745 --> 00:06:12,499 Shit, I mean, I could get you to 250 if we being real. 159 00:06:12,582 --> 00:06:15,418 But if you gonna do this, you got to commit, a'ight? 160 00:06:15,502 --> 00:06:19,339 I'm talkin' Daniel-Day-Dale-Rubin commit. 161 00:06:19,422 --> 00:06:21,007 Anything you say, Tru. 162 00:06:21,091 --> 00:06:23,760 - Just one scoop of gravy today, Nan. - One scoop? 163 00:06:23,844 --> 00:06:25,554 Come on, Benny, I've seen you drink gravy 164 00:06:25,637 --> 00:06:28,098 from a Gatorade bottle. What's going on? 165 00:06:28,181 --> 00:06:29,391 I'm just sick and tired 166 00:06:29,474 --> 00:06:31,393 of being the only fat kid at the pool party. 167 00:06:31,476 --> 00:06:33,228 Everyone's gonna be so hot and naked, 168 00:06:33,311 --> 00:06:35,313 and I'm gonna look like a glazed turducken. 169 00:06:35,397 --> 00:06:37,899 Look, as an ambassador of self-love, 170 00:06:37,983 --> 00:06:39,442 I think you look incredible. 171 00:06:39,526 --> 00:06:41,903 But if you're serious about getting into shape, 172 00:06:41,987 --> 00:06:44,322 I'll put you on my Dericaerobics cleanse. 173 00:06:44,406 --> 00:06:47,450 It focuses on the inside as much as it does the out. 174 00:06:47,534 --> 00:06:49,244 Like a bidet for the soul. 175 00:06:49,327 --> 00:06:51,121 I'm in. 176 00:06:51,204 --> 00:06:53,123 Then it's settled. Truman's gonna get Dale 177 00:06:53,206 --> 00:06:54,916 up to 100 followers, 178 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:58,837 and I'm gonna get Benny down to 100 pounds. 179 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:02,340 [whispers] You're gon' be my masterpiece. 180 00:07:02,424 --> 00:07:03,842 A'ight, so, if we're gonna get you 181 00:07:03,925 --> 00:07:06,636 to a hundred followers, you're gonna need a persona. 182 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:08,096 Why can't I just be myself? 183 00:07:08,180 --> 00:07:10,098 No offense, but don't nobody give a shit 184 00:07:10,182 --> 00:07:11,808 about regular old Dale, bro. 185 00:07:11,892 --> 00:07:13,894 [chuckles] We gonna have to spice you up a little bit. 186 00:07:13,977 --> 00:07:15,854 Like, a lot, a bit. Okay, first, 187 00:07:15,937 --> 00:07:18,148 you're gonna need a dope handle, right? 188 00:07:18,231 --> 00:07:19,316 Peep my shit. 189 00:07:19,399 --> 00:07:20,650 TruStories69. 190 00:07:20,734 --> 00:07:22,110 It combines my love of cinema 191 00:07:22,194 --> 00:07:25,071 with my love of sixty-nining. 192 00:07:25,155 --> 00:07:26,740 Or check out my profile, 193 00:07:26,823 --> 00:07:29,159 @TacoBoutChange, 'cause I love tacos 194 00:07:29,242 --> 00:07:30,619 and I'm all about that change. 195 00:07:30,702 --> 00:07:32,329 How's that sweat suit going, Benny? 196 00:07:32,412 --> 00:07:34,623 Full-on wood-fire pizza oven in here. 197 00:07:34,706 --> 00:07:37,125 [exhales] Show 'em my profile, Tru. 198 00:07:37,209 --> 00:07:39,628 @1YungHyung. My brand 199 00:07:39,711 --> 00:07:42,130 is gangster shoe salesman. 200 00:07:42,214 --> 00:07:43,256 Three hundred and twenty-one followers. 201 00:07:43,340 --> 00:07:44,674 Holler at your fucking boy. 202 00:07:44,758 --> 00:07:46,426 So, what's your handle gonna be? 203 00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:48,762 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, no pressure. Just chill. Just chill. 204 00:07:48,845 --> 00:07:50,222 Wait. Wait. No pressure. All right. 205 00:07:50,305 --> 00:07:52,432 But it does have to encapsulate your entire vibe. 206 00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:54,684 [sputters] Geez, that's a toughie. Uh... 207 00:07:54,768 --> 00:07:57,020 I mean, I like hiking, and my name is Dale, so... 208 00:07:57,103 --> 00:07:59,314 Yo, I got it. I got it. 209 00:07:59,397 --> 00:08:01,149 It's irreverent, it's iconic, 210 00:08:01,233 --> 00:08:03,235 and, best of all, it's available. 211 00:08:03,318 --> 00:08:05,070 Congratulations, Dale. 212 00:08:05,153 --> 00:08:09,574 - You're officially @BigPeenz! - Wow, 213 00:08:09,658 --> 00:08:11,952 my first handle. Now what do we do? 214 00:08:12,035 --> 00:08:14,079 Now we just need a fire profile pic. 215 00:08:14,162 --> 00:08:16,039 Step into my office, playboy. 216 00:08:16,122 --> 00:08:19,251 - I got a flex for that. - Whoa. 217 00:08:19,334 --> 00:08:21,002 ♪ I make the club go viral, I got ♪ 218 00:08:21,086 --> 00:08:22,671 ♪ Bitches by the boatload... 219 00:08:22,754 --> 00:08:25,298 No way. Are these all yours? 220 00:08:25,382 --> 00:08:27,634 [scoffs] You think this is a fucking game? 221 00:08:27,717 --> 00:08:29,761 This is just the stash my parents know about. 222 00:08:29,844 --> 00:08:33,014 All right, check it. The Yeezy 2 "Red Octobers." 223 00:08:33,098 --> 00:08:36,393 A crimson high-top with a strap that screams ankle support. 224 00:08:36,476 --> 00:08:38,520 - Go ahead. Whiff the rubber bouquet, son. - [sniffs] 225 00:08:38,603 --> 00:08:40,397 Mmm, rubbery. 226 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:41,648 Honestly, I'm not gon' lie, 227 00:08:41,731 --> 00:08:43,441 these might be a little too fire for my boy. 228 00:08:43,525 --> 00:08:46,194 You right, you right. We got to take it down a notch. 229 00:08:46,278 --> 00:08:48,488 Something more Dale. 230 00:08:48,571 --> 00:08:49,906 ♪ But they got their hands up... 231 00:08:49,990 --> 00:08:51,157 Here we are. [grunts] 232 00:08:51,241 --> 00:08:53,952 The "Jason Kidd" Air Zoom Flight 95s 233 00:08:54,035 --> 00:08:55,662 in black and purple. 234 00:08:55,745 --> 00:08:57,622 The Golden Oreo of shoes. 235 00:08:57,706 --> 00:09:00,542 ♪ I got bitches by the boatload ♪ 236 00:09:00,625 --> 00:09:02,460 ♪ Eeny, meeny, miney... 237 00:09:02,544 --> 00:09:04,254 Filter the shit out of it. 238 00:09:04,337 --> 00:09:07,215 ♪ And my niggas, we're the shit, though ♪ 239 00:09:07,299 --> 00:09:08,800 ♪ Lit, we lit, we lit ♪♪ 240 00:09:08,883 --> 00:09:11,386 Congratulations, Dale. You now have followers. 241 00:09:11,469 --> 00:09:13,513 I'm glad yours is working. I'm still husky. 242 00:09:13,596 --> 00:09:16,016 That was just your water weight. I got you, bruh. 243 00:09:16,099 --> 00:09:18,727 Phase two starts now. 244 00:09:18,810 --> 00:09:21,021 Welcome to Gorp, aka... 245 00:09:21,104 --> 00:09:23,648 heaven. My go-to spot for fair-trade asparagus, 246 00:09:23,732 --> 00:09:27,027 CBD nasal spray and all your séance needs. 247 00:09:27,110 --> 00:09:30,530 Hey, Derica. Namaste. 248 00:09:30,613 --> 00:09:33,199 Hey, Juniper. This is my friend Benny. 249 00:09:33,283 --> 00:09:34,909 He needs a super-cleanse. 250 00:09:34,993 --> 00:09:36,911 - [knuckles pop] - Hell, yeah. 251 00:09:36,995 --> 00:09:38,663 Blessings, Benny. 252 00:09:38,747 --> 00:09:41,666 Thank you for trusting me with your wellness walkabout. 253 00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:45,003 - Hey, hey, hey, hey! What is that? - [scanner beeps, buzzes] 254 00:09:45,086 --> 00:09:46,671 [gasps] I've never seen anything like this. 255 00:09:46,755 --> 00:09:49,090 He's 80% marinara. 256 00:09:49,174 --> 00:09:51,426 How many lunar cycles do we have to lose the weight? 257 00:09:51,509 --> 00:09:53,470 - Three days. - Okay. 258 00:09:53,553 --> 00:09:56,514 This is Devil's Bunk Bed. Little special sauce 259 00:09:56,598 --> 00:10:00,393 I picked up during my silent retreat in Burma. 260 00:10:00,477 --> 00:10:04,314 It may cause temporary blindness, 261 00:10:04,397 --> 00:10:07,817 but it's guaranteed to put some acai in your bowl. 262 00:10:08,818 --> 00:10:11,821 Guys, something weird is happening! 263 00:10:11,905 --> 00:10:13,114 - [Juniper laughs] - [Derica] Yes! 264 00:10:13,198 --> 00:10:15,825 That's Anubis fighting your fat energy. 265 00:10:15,909 --> 00:10:17,827 [bleats] 266 00:10:17,911 --> 00:10:19,954 [vocalizing] 267 00:10:20,038 --> 00:10:22,624 [groaning] 268 00:10:23,666 --> 00:10:25,794 [farts] 269 00:10:25,877 --> 00:10:27,128 [bleats] 270 00:10:29,589 --> 00:10:31,174 One pound?! 271 00:10:31,257 --> 00:10:32,550 Yes. 272 00:10:32,634 --> 00:10:35,220 That'll be $342. 273 00:10:39,599 --> 00:10:41,059 Yeah, Tru, 274 00:10:41,142 --> 00:10:42,394 I don't really understand. 275 00:10:42,477 --> 00:10:44,687 How is this supposed to get me followers? 276 00:10:44,771 --> 00:10:46,940 The more artsy, the better, bro. 277 00:10:47,023 --> 00:10:48,942 - [screams, grunts] - Just look at our highbrow king, 278 00:10:49,025 --> 00:10:52,237 French-Canadian auteur Denis Villeneuve. 279 00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:53,613 - Who? - Man, 280 00:10:53,696 --> 00:10:55,657 of course you don't know Denis. 281 00:10:55,740 --> 00:10:59,119 Bro, he's the artsiest director ever. 282 00:10:59,202 --> 00:11:01,079 Sicario. Dune! 283 00:11:01,162 --> 00:11:02,539 Come on, dawg. 284 00:11:02,622 --> 00:11:05,083 There were, like, ten lines in Blade Runner, 285 00:11:05,166 --> 00:11:06,292 but that shit looked hot as hell, 286 00:11:06,376 --> 00:11:08,503 and now Denis has three million followers. 287 00:11:08,586 --> 00:11:10,255 Yeah, but I'm not artsy. 288 00:11:10,338 --> 00:11:12,882 You don't got to be artsy, okay? 289 00:11:12,966 --> 00:11:16,970 You just got to have people think you're artsy, all right? 290 00:11:17,053 --> 00:11:19,347 Do you want Lily to like you or not? 291 00:11:19,431 --> 00:11:22,142 Okay, okay. Post it. 292 00:11:26,271 --> 00:11:27,939 [heart beating] 293 00:11:28,022 --> 00:11:29,691 More. I need more, man. 294 00:11:29,774 --> 00:11:32,235 Then we got to go even artsier. 295 00:11:32,318 --> 00:11:34,320 D, that Bunk Bed shot didn't do shit, 296 00:11:34,404 --> 00:11:36,865 the party's tomorrow, and I'm still chubby as fuck. 297 00:11:36,948 --> 00:11:38,783 Okay, you're right. Hard pivot. 298 00:11:38,867 --> 00:11:40,952 I'm putting you on the same workout regimen 299 00:11:41,035 --> 00:11:43,538 Beyoncé used to lose her baby weight. 300 00:11:43,621 --> 00:11:45,498 Now we're talking. 301 00:11:45,582 --> 00:11:47,709 Welcome to kayaking class, bitch! 302 00:11:47,792 --> 00:11:50,086 [whoops] Loving all the positive paddle-tudes. 303 00:11:50,170 --> 00:11:53,381 Okay, let's stay in a safe line until we hit Dodger Stadium. 304 00:11:53,465 --> 00:11:55,383 After that, we're gonna hit a few class twos 305 00:11:55,467 --> 00:11:57,844 and then a meaty class four right around Skid Row. 306 00:11:57,927 --> 00:11:59,429 - [whoops] - [Benny grunting] 307 00:11:59,512 --> 00:12:01,014 Oh, shit. 308 00:12:01,097 --> 00:12:03,725 Come on, Benny. Keep up. 309 00:12:03,808 --> 00:12:06,019 This shit is harder than it looks, and I'm soaked. 310 00:12:06,102 --> 00:12:08,771 One, two, dawg. You got this. 311 00:12:08,855 --> 00:12:10,398 Okay. Here we go. 312 00:12:10,482 --> 00:12:12,525 We're doing it. Feeling the burn! 313 00:12:12,609 --> 00:12:14,777 [Leslie] Skid Row rapids are coming up! 314 00:12:14,861 --> 00:12:17,155 [panting] Derica, check me out! 315 00:12:17,238 --> 00:12:18,656 I'm a white person! 316 00:12:18,740 --> 00:12:20,909 Whoa! [grunts] 317 00:12:20,992 --> 00:12:22,827 [screams] 318 00:12:22,911 --> 00:12:24,120 Benny, wait! 319 00:12:24,204 --> 00:12:26,498 After you clear the rapids, veer left 320 00:12:26,581 --> 00:12:30,627 - to avoid the needles! - Oh, fuck. 321 00:12:32,253 --> 00:12:36,257 [groans] I don't feel so good. 322 00:12:37,884 --> 00:12:40,762 The follower dam is about to break, Dale. 323 00:12:40,845 --> 00:12:42,096 We 'bout to do a time-lapse 324 00:12:42,180 --> 00:12:43,973 of you painting a mural of the lunch lady 325 00:12:44,057 --> 00:12:46,100 using only cafeteria food. 326 00:12:46,184 --> 00:12:49,062 [Italian accent] Picasso meetsa pepperoni. 327 00:12:49,145 --> 00:12:51,523 - [Dale humming] - Yes, Dale. 328 00:12:51,606 --> 00:12:54,859 Yes. Feel the sauce between your fingers, Dale. 329 00:12:54,943 --> 00:12:58,071 - Yes, bro. - The hell are you guys doing? 330 00:12:58,154 --> 00:13:00,865 - You smearing 'ronis all over the goddamn wall. - [screams] 331 00:13:03,243 --> 00:13:05,245 [gasps in slow motion] 332 00:13:05,328 --> 00:13:06,663 [in slow motion] No! 333 00:13:09,707 --> 00:13:13,211 - You guys, lunch lady's got a pizza face! - [laughter] 334 00:13:13,294 --> 00:13:15,755 Hey, no! What is y'all doing? 335 00:13:15,838 --> 00:13:17,215 This is not artsy! 336 00:13:17,298 --> 00:13:19,217 This shit is not it! 337 00:13:19,300 --> 00:13:21,594 [girl] Hey, new kid, what's your Insta? 338 00:13:21,678 --> 00:13:24,597 @BigPeenz! Holler at your boy! 339 00:13:24,681 --> 00:13:26,057 [phones chiming] 340 00:13:26,140 --> 00:13:27,850 ♪ ♪ 341 00:13:35,149 --> 00:13:37,819 ♪ We outta here ♪ 342 00:13:37,902 --> 00:13:40,238 ♪ We outta here ♪ 343 00:13:40,321 --> 00:13:41,823 ♪ We outta here ♪ 344 00:13:41,906 --> 00:13:44,492 ♪ We outta here ♪ 345 00:13:44,576 --> 00:13:47,036 ♪ Let me see you take off, take off ♪ 346 00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:48,746 ♪ Let me see you take off ♪ 347 00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:51,833 ♪ Take off, let me see you take off, take off ♪ 348 00:13:51,916 --> 00:13:53,751 ♪ Let me see you take off ♪ 349 00:14:02,051 --> 00:14:04,220 ♪ We outta here ♪♪ 350 00:14:05,847 --> 00:14:07,724 Hey, pass the broccoli, 351 00:14:07,807 --> 00:14:09,392 - would you, pal? - [chuckles] Oh, you bet. 352 00:14:09,475 --> 00:14:12,186 - [grunts] - [laughs] Boom! Yes! 353 00:14:12,270 --> 00:14:14,022 Surprise! Pizza in the broc! 354 00:14:14,105 --> 00:14:15,857 - Pew, pew, pew, pew! - Oh, what the heck, Dale? 355 00:14:15,940 --> 00:14:17,275 I just got a haircut. 356 00:14:17,358 --> 00:14:18,985 Big Peenz strikes again. 357 00:14:19,068 --> 00:14:21,863 What's gotten into you, wasting food like that? 358 00:14:21,946 --> 00:14:23,573 You better pick up all that broccoli. 359 00:14:23,656 --> 00:14:26,159 [scoffs, laughs] Okay, that's rich. 360 00:14:26,242 --> 00:14:28,828 I don't have to listen to you. You're not even my real mom. 361 00:14:28,911 --> 00:14:30,413 Oh, you bet your ass I am. 362 00:14:30,496 --> 00:14:32,165 And just for that, you not getting dessert. 363 00:14:32,248 --> 00:14:33,583 Oh, you mean the cobbler you baked? 364 00:14:33,666 --> 00:14:35,293 Dad, why don't you do me a favor and check your slippers. 365 00:14:35,376 --> 00:14:36,836 Oh, holy mackerel. 366 00:14:36,919 --> 00:14:38,630 There's peach cobbler in my slippy dips. 367 00:14:38,713 --> 00:14:40,632 - Come on! - Double boom! 368 00:14:40,715 --> 00:14:42,592 You just got slipper cobbler'd! 369 00:14:42,675 --> 00:14:45,094 - #SlipperCobbler. - Oh, that's enough. 370 00:14:45,178 --> 00:14:47,722 You better get your ass to bed, Dale. You trippin'. 371 00:14:47,805 --> 00:14:50,058 Yeah. Trippin' out of control, D-bone. 372 00:14:50,141 --> 00:14:52,310 And don't you even think about going to bed 373 00:14:52,393 --> 00:14:53,478 without brushing your teeth. 374 00:14:53,561 --> 00:14:55,355 I got a hundo followers, Trini. 375 00:14:55,438 --> 00:14:57,857 I don't need to brush shit! 376 00:14:57,940 --> 00:14:59,651 - [door closes] - Mmm. 377 00:14:59,734 --> 00:15:02,862 That is a great slipper cobbler, babe. 378 00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:04,197 [indistinct chatter] 379 00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:05,948 Well, Fair-fuck me. 380 00:15:06,032 --> 00:15:08,117 It's a beautiful day, and the sun is flexing 381 00:15:08,201 --> 00:15:10,036 on Melody's verified pool party 382 00:15:10,119 --> 00:15:12,872 as influencers from all social platforms arrive. 383 00:15:12,955 --> 00:15:14,624 Who are you excited to see, 'Manda? 384 00:15:14,707 --> 00:15:16,084 Honestly, no one. 385 00:15:16,167 --> 00:15:18,836 My dads told me they're getting a divorce last night, 386 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:21,839 and I am pretty shook. Oh, my God! 387 00:15:21,923 --> 00:15:23,966 It's Big Peenz! 388 00:15:24,050 --> 00:15:25,426 Give it to me straight, Tru. 389 00:15:25,510 --> 00:15:27,970 - How do I look? - Emaciated. 390 00:15:28,054 --> 00:15:30,473 Uh, shcapow, 117. 391 00:15:31,474 --> 00:15:33,434 - No way! - Oh, my God. 392 00:15:33,518 --> 00:15:34,894 - Yas! - [♪ Sirah: "Popt the Bubblegum"] 393 00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:36,437 ♪ Gold dripping from my necklace ♪ 394 00:15:36,521 --> 00:15:39,774 ♪ The coasts we coast ♪ 395 00:15:39,857 --> 00:15:41,442 ♪ Losing all perspective ♪ 396 00:15:41,526 --> 00:15:44,404 ♪ The nights we toast ♪ 397 00:15:44,487 --> 00:15:46,989 ♪ Hold it up to treasure ♪ 398 00:15:47,073 --> 00:15:49,659 ♪ And don't you know, I-I ♪ 399 00:15:49,742 --> 00:15:51,911 - ♪ Popped the bubblegum... - Holy moly. 400 00:15:51,994 --> 00:15:54,831 It's like Raging Waters fucked a Soho House. 401 00:15:54,914 --> 00:15:57,500 Yo, look, a Wheat Thin wall! 402 00:15:57,583 --> 00:16:01,087 [chuckles] Whoa, diving board on the roof! 403 00:16:02,130 --> 00:16:04,799 Check it, Quattro. Free lip kits, baby. 404 00:16:04,882 --> 00:16:07,468 Pigeon, please. You ain't got no damn lips. 405 00:16:07,552 --> 00:16:10,763 [imitates tires screeching] Puma brought a Puma? 406 00:16:10,847 --> 00:16:13,015 - [all gasp] - [chuckles] Cheese! 407 00:16:13,099 --> 00:16:14,183 Bobo, here. Peace sign. 408 00:16:14,267 --> 00:16:16,519 - Oh, shit! Bobo the god. - Oh! - Tight. 409 00:16:16,602 --> 00:16:18,563 [sniffs] Oh, my God. 410 00:16:18,646 --> 00:16:20,606 Jamón carving station. 411 00:16:20,690 --> 00:16:22,775 You should have a bite, Benny. 412 00:16:22,859 --> 00:16:24,318 You're starting to look like E.T. 413 00:16:24,402 --> 00:16:25,528 No way. 414 00:16:25,611 --> 00:16:27,989 Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. 415 00:16:28,072 --> 00:16:29,991 Yo, Dale, look. There's Lily. 416 00:16:30,074 --> 00:16:31,284 [laughs] 417 00:16:31,367 --> 00:16:33,202 Take it from a true gentleman, bro. 418 00:16:33,286 --> 00:16:35,496 Puncture her float. She'll start drowning. 419 00:16:35,580 --> 00:16:37,540 Then you resuscitate her back to life, 420 00:16:37,623 --> 00:16:39,500 and boom! You're a hero. 421 00:16:39,584 --> 00:16:43,212 Or you could bring her, like, a big bowl of rice with... 422 00:16:43,296 --> 00:16:45,047 [hiccups] ...uh, some Pedialyte. 423 00:16:45,131 --> 00:16:46,716 Yeah. Thanks for the advice, guys, 424 00:16:46,799 --> 00:16:48,926 but Big Peenz has got this covered. 425 00:16:49,010 --> 00:16:50,720 Truman, what did you do to him? 426 00:16:50,803 --> 00:16:54,223 I think I created a mon... Oh, my God. 427 00:16:54,307 --> 00:16:55,933 It's Denis Villeneuve! 428 00:16:56,017 --> 00:16:57,977 [exhales sharply] All right. I'm-a pitch him 429 00:16:58,060 --> 00:16:59,645 Untitled Shit Project. Wish me luck. 430 00:16:59,729 --> 00:17:01,314 I'm gonna go check out the buffet 431 00:17:01,397 --> 00:17:03,024 and, who knows, maybe run into Melody, 432 00:17:03,107 --> 00:17:04,484 become her muse, have a sleepover. 433 00:17:04,567 --> 00:17:06,736 [chuckles] I don't know. Um, you gonna be okay alone? 434 00:17:06,819 --> 00:17:08,446 [slurring] Don't worry about me, Tru. 435 00:17:08,529 --> 00:17:10,656 I'm gonna change into my bathing suit 436 00:17:10,740 --> 00:17:12,658 and give this new bod 437 00:17:12,742 --> 00:17:16,037 the grand entrance it deserves. 438 00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:19,123 Someone tell the theater kids to get the camera ready! 439 00:17:20,166 --> 00:17:22,543 Yo, yo, yo! What up, Lil? 440 00:17:22,627 --> 00:17:24,212 What'd you think of my last Big Peenz vid? 441 00:17:24,295 --> 00:17:26,422 Pretty dope. Pizza rules. 442 00:17:26,506 --> 00:17:29,091 Oh, hey. Uh... sure, yeah. 443 00:17:29,175 --> 00:17:30,551 - It was fun. - Check it out. 444 00:17:30,635 --> 00:17:32,178 Pizza in my pockets. 445 00:17:32,261 --> 00:17:33,721 - Deep-dish. - Ew. 446 00:17:33,805 --> 00:17:35,765 How long has that been in there? 447 00:17:35,848 --> 00:17:38,392 Couple hours. I also have buffalo wings in my fanny. 448 00:17:38,476 --> 00:17:39,769 Might drop 'em in the hot tub later, 449 00:17:39,852 --> 00:17:41,270 might not. We'll play it by ear. 450 00:17:41,354 --> 00:17:43,606 Yeah, I don't really know what to say. 451 00:17:43,689 --> 00:17:45,358 That's really weird of you, Dale. 452 00:17:45,441 --> 00:17:47,276 - I thought you were different. - I am different. 453 00:17:47,360 --> 00:17:48,694 I'm Big Peenz, baby. 454 00:17:48,778 --> 00:17:50,905 I have over a hundred followers. 455 00:17:50,988 --> 00:17:53,032 Right. Okay, you know, 456 00:17:53,115 --> 00:17:55,326 I think I'm gonna go check out the Puma station. 457 00:17:55,409 --> 00:17:57,286 - Come on, you guys. Let's go. - Wait, wait, no, don't go. 458 00:17:57,370 --> 00:17:59,914 I, uh, I have something super big planned for you. 459 00:17:59,997 --> 00:18:01,916 I-It's, like, my biggest peen yet. 460 00:18:01,999 --> 00:18:04,710 So j-just stay here, okay? 461 00:18:05,711 --> 00:18:07,672 [indistinct chatter] 462 00:18:15,763 --> 00:18:18,266 [Derica] Whoa. 463 00:18:18,349 --> 00:18:19,600 [indistinct whispering] 464 00:18:19,684 --> 00:18:21,477 [gasps] 465 00:18:21,561 --> 00:18:23,688 Melody Harper, 466 00:18:23,771 --> 00:18:26,607 the League of Super Lit Verified Sosh-Meed Monks 467 00:18:26,691 --> 00:18:29,193 grants you true influencer status 468 00:18:29,277 --> 00:18:31,070 as we brand you 469 00:18:31,153 --> 00:18:35,449 with our official "V" rare check mark. 470 00:18:35,533 --> 00:18:38,870 [crying] Stop it. My foundation is caking. 471 00:18:38,953 --> 00:18:41,205 Oh, shit! 472 00:18:42,248 --> 00:18:43,624 Who the hell are you? 473 00:18:43,708 --> 00:18:46,544 [chuckles] Oh, hey, Melody. I-I'm Der... 474 00:18:46,627 --> 00:18:49,630 I don't care! Get the hell out of my verification ceremony. 475 00:18:49,714 --> 00:18:52,717 No! Get off of me. Melody! 476 00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:56,345 [sniffs] Oh, God, that smells good. 477 00:18:56,429 --> 00:18:58,848 And the camera lyrically sweeps 478 00:18:58,931 --> 00:19:00,516 to land on a bootyhole. 479 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:01,976 [Weston] [chuckles] Hey there, Benny. 480 00:19:02,059 --> 00:19:04,312 Principal Weston? Am I hallucinating, 481 00:19:04,395 --> 00:19:06,355 - or is your wife bomb as fuck? - [Mrs. Weston chuckles] 482 00:19:06,439 --> 00:19:08,941 Nah, you see straight. She fine as hell. 483 00:19:09,025 --> 00:19:11,819 But wait, she doesn't mind that you're a little thicc? 484 00:19:11,903 --> 00:19:15,031 - My dude, she love the belly. - Mm-hmm. 485 00:19:16,073 --> 00:19:18,993 [beeping rapidly] 486 00:19:19,076 --> 00:19:21,412 Oh, my God! 487 00:19:26,042 --> 00:19:28,794 [whimpers, exhales] 488 00:19:34,133 --> 00:19:37,595 Yo! Big Peenz is about to jump off the roof 489 00:19:37,678 --> 00:19:39,597 with pizza in his hands! 490 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:41,474 [partygoers gasp, cheering] 491 00:19:41,557 --> 00:19:42,642 [grunts] 492 00:19:42,725 --> 00:19:44,769 You've got this, Big Peenz. 493 00:19:44,852 --> 00:19:47,772 Lily, this is for you! 494 00:19:47,855 --> 00:19:51,067 Big Peenz! 495 00:19:56,030 --> 00:19:59,367 Oh, my God, my eye! I'm allergic to chlorine! 496 00:20:01,661 --> 00:20:04,246 - [Bobo growls] - Bobo. Not again, Bobo! 497 00:20:04,330 --> 00:20:06,207 - [Bobo snarling] - No, no, no! No, no, no, no! 498 00:20:06,290 --> 00:20:07,917 No, no, no! [screaming] 499 00:20:09,418 --> 00:20:11,087 No, no, no, no, no! 500 00:20:11,170 --> 00:20:13,047 [groans] 501 00:20:14,048 --> 00:20:15,967 - Cody! - [groans] 502 00:20:16,050 --> 00:20:17,343 What did you do, Dale? 503 00:20:17,426 --> 00:20:20,179 I'm dying, and it's all your fault. 504 00:20:20,262 --> 00:20:22,139 I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to kill you at all. 505 00:20:22,223 --> 00:20:23,766 I-I just wanted to impress Lily 506 00:20:23,849 --> 00:20:25,518 and be a cool prank influencer like you. 507 00:20:25,601 --> 00:20:27,561 - [coughing] - Oh, God, what have I done? 508 00:20:29,021 --> 00:20:31,065 But you didn't even have 509 00:20:31,148 --> 00:20:34,068 a charitable component. 510 00:20:34,151 --> 00:20:35,820 [exhales] 511 00:20:35,903 --> 00:20:38,531 [Dale sobs] 512 00:20:38,614 --> 00:20:41,742 And that's why you never mess with The "Trian-glay." 513 00:20:41,826 --> 00:20:43,202 - [laughs] - [partygoers gasp] 514 00:20:43,285 --> 00:20:44,954 Got you, Dale. 515 00:20:45,037 --> 00:20:46,872 You're alive? 516 00:20:46,956 --> 00:20:48,833 Boom. Suck it, Dale. 517 00:20:48,916 --> 00:20:50,126 Oh, no. 518 00:20:50,209 --> 00:20:52,003 [chanting] Big Peenz Pizza Face! 519 00:20:52,086 --> 00:20:55,256 Big Peenz Pizza Face! Big Peenz Pizza Face! 520 00:20:55,339 --> 00:20:58,175 - Big Peenz Pizza Face! - [laughs] Now, that's what I call 521 00:20:58,259 --> 00:21:01,053 - a prank vid. - [Dale] No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 522 00:21:01,137 --> 00:21:03,639 My precious followers! How'd you do it? 523 00:21:03,723 --> 00:21:06,934 A magician never reveals his secrets. 524 00:21:07,018 --> 00:21:08,436 Fuck it! 525 00:21:08,519 --> 00:21:11,188 Poof! The chlorine in the eye? That was all Cubby. 526 00:21:11,272 --> 00:21:13,607 The Wheat Thin? All Shu, baby. 527 00:21:13,691 --> 00:21:15,026 And Bobo the Puma and I have done, 528 00:21:15,109 --> 00:21:16,736 - like, ten videos together. - [growls] 529 00:21:16,819 --> 00:21:18,487 You got to check out his LinkedIn. 530 00:21:18,571 --> 00:21:20,322 It's insane. 531 00:21:20,406 --> 00:21:23,534 Wow. You guys really are prank lords. 532 00:21:23,617 --> 00:21:25,327 I'm so sorry I tried to jack your style. 533 00:21:25,411 --> 00:21:27,371 Ah, it's okay, Dale. 534 00:21:27,455 --> 00:21:30,082 Pranking just isn't your brand. It's ours. 535 00:21:30,166 --> 00:21:33,335 You got to find your own lane and be true to yourself. 536 00:21:33,419 --> 00:21:35,046 Speaking of which, 537 00:21:35,129 --> 00:21:37,298 we planted a tree in the Canadian wilderness 538 00:21:37,381 --> 00:21:39,633 in your name. Hopefully, like this tree, 539 00:21:39,717 --> 00:21:41,677 you can grow into your true self. 540 00:21:41,761 --> 00:21:43,596 You know, Cody's right, Dale. 541 00:21:43,679 --> 00:21:45,347 I was going about this all wrong. 542 00:21:45,431 --> 00:21:48,434 Skinny isn't my brand, man. Fat is. 543 00:21:48,517 --> 00:21:51,145 DJ Khaled, Lizzo, Rick Ross. 544 00:21:51,228 --> 00:21:52,480 The biggest influencers 545 00:21:52,563 --> 00:21:54,940 are literally the biggest influencers. 546 00:21:55,024 --> 00:21:57,109 I shouldn't have been losing weight, man. 547 00:21:57,193 --> 00:21:59,195 I should've been gaining weight. 548 00:22:00,821 --> 00:22:02,740 Oh, I'm proud of you, Benny. 549 00:22:02,823 --> 00:22:05,951 Being true to yourself is, like, the most body-posi move. 550 00:22:06,035 --> 00:22:08,913 Bravo, Cody. That was amazing. 551 00:22:08,996 --> 00:22:12,291 I don't get it, Denis. I thought you was, like, super highbrow. 552 00:22:12,374 --> 00:22:15,836 Ah, Truman, sometimes the lowest of brows 553 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:17,630 can be the highest of brows. 554 00:22:17,713 --> 00:22:21,675 The opening of Blade Runner was a nine-minute trick shot. 555 00:22:21,759 --> 00:22:23,969 I also love les mozzarella sticks 556 00:22:24,053 --> 00:22:26,931 - and corn dogs. - Oui, bro, oui. 557 00:22:27,014 --> 00:22:28,224 You just blew my mind. 558 00:22:28,307 --> 00:22:30,893 The three of you need to leave immediately. 559 00:22:30,976 --> 00:22:32,895 Especially the loser with zero followers. 560 00:22:32,978 --> 00:22:35,189 Melody, you know me. 561 00:22:35,272 --> 00:22:37,358 Girl, we're in Algebra together. 562 00:22:37,441 --> 00:22:40,444 - No, stop it. Let me go! - What? - Shit! 563 00:22:40,528 --> 00:22:43,656 Truman, how would you like to come PA for me 564 00:22:43,739 --> 00:22:45,199 on the set of Dune 2? 565 00:22:45,282 --> 00:22:48,452 Denis, I would love to keep linking and building, 566 00:22:48,536 --> 00:22:50,621 but my friends are having a branding crisis 567 00:22:50,704 --> 00:22:53,624 and they really need my help, so I got to dip. 568 00:22:56,377 --> 00:22:57,586 Hey there. 569 00:22:57,670 --> 00:22:58,963 What's up to my zero followers. 570 00:22:59,046 --> 00:23:01,132 Just want to say I'm officially changing my handle. 571 00:23:01,215 --> 00:23:02,967 Big Peenz is dead. From now on, 572 00:23:03,050 --> 00:23:05,719 you can catch me @DalesTrailz for science projects, 573 00:23:05,803 --> 00:23:07,847 fire hiking tips and nature vids. 574 00:23:07,930 --> 00:23:09,431 Good night, Instagram. 575 00:23:09,515 --> 00:23:13,352 [chuckles] No one wishes Instagram good night, you noob. 576 00:23:13,435 --> 00:23:16,480 You know what you kids could use? Some dessert. 577 00:23:16,564 --> 00:23:18,232 Awesome. Thanks, Mom. 578 00:23:18,315 --> 00:23:21,569 Mmm. Yeah, this cobbler's fire as fuck, Ms. Rubin. 579 00:23:21,652 --> 00:23:23,279 - [phone chimes] - Guys, look. 580 00:23:23,362 --> 00:23:25,656 My first real follower. [gasps] 581 00:23:25,739 --> 00:23:27,074 And it's Lily! 582 00:23:27,158 --> 00:23:28,492 - Hey! - Big pimpin'! - Oh, what?! 583 00:23:28,576 --> 00:23:29,869 My work here is done. 584 00:23:29,952 --> 00:23:32,329 Now that Lily's following you, pressure's on. 585 00:23:32,413 --> 00:23:34,790 You got to keep up with the hot content. 586 00:23:34,874 --> 00:23:36,333 I think you mean that hot "Dale-tent." 587 00:23:36,417 --> 00:23:37,626 Get ready for it, guys, 588 00:23:37,710 --> 00:23:39,628 'cause there's a storm a-coming. Oh! 589 00:23:39,712 --> 00:23:41,547 Do you think Lily wants to see my rainstick? 590 00:23:41,630 --> 00:23:43,299 Hey, Tru, film this. 591 00:23:43,382 --> 00:23:46,260 - Rainstick dunk! - [Derica] Hey! - [Truman] Hey, 592 00:23:46,343 --> 00:23:47,970 - bro. - [whoops] - You got it, baby! 593 00:23:48,053 --> 00:23:50,472 - Kobe! - Gee, the Internet's gonna eat him alive. 594 00:23:50,556 --> 00:23:52,474 - Should we tell him? - Nah. - From way downtown, 595 00:23:52,558 --> 00:23:54,101 - LeBron. - Just let him have this. 596 00:23:54,185 --> 00:23:57,229 Look at this John Stockton-ass bitch 597 00:23:57,313 --> 00:23:59,773 trying to make it rain. 598 00:23:59,857 --> 00:24:02,693 There you go, running your damn mouth again. 599 00:24:02,776 --> 00:24:05,571 Now where we gonna sleep, huh? 600 00:24:05,654 --> 00:24:06,572 ♪ The block is hot ♪ 601 00:24:06,655 --> 00:24:08,616 ♪ ♪ 602 00:24:16,665 --> 00:24:17,833 ♪ The block is hot ♪ 603 00:24:17,917 --> 00:24:20,377 ♪ ♪ 604 00:24:28,219 --> 00:24:29,595 ♪ The block is hot ♪ 605 00:24:29,678 --> 00:24:31,639 ♪ ♪ 606 00:24:39,688 --> 00:24:41,649 ♪ The block is hot ♪♪ 607 00:24:52,701 --> 00:24:54,662 Chirp.