♪ I'm in my twenties so I ♪
♪ panic in every way I'm ♪
♪ so scared of the future ♪
♪ I keep missing today ♪
♪ how did you do it? ♪
♪ How did it turn out all right? ♪
♪ I swear it's always easier back then ♪
♪ or is it just hindsight? ♪
♪ They keep telling me... ♪
Jordan.
Help me with the clasp.
So, this is a huge waste of time.
♪ What if that doesn't save me? ♪
You're welcome.
♪ they say, "if I could go back and do it again ♪
♪ "I would've wasted all my money ♪
♪ "would've slept with all my friends" ♪
♪ but you didn't 'cause you had ♪
♪ your whole life ahead of you, baby ♪
Ok.
Hey.
Um... i think this is gonna be good.
♪ I don't dare shut my eyes ♪
♪ I don't wanna miss a thing ♪
♪ I don't wanna let you down ♪
You sure pops is gonna be at this cabin?
This cabin was in your father's family for generations,
and it's your father's favorite place to hide.
He's ignoring my calls and texts.
The only way to make sure is to show up.
So, let's go. Time to roll.
Hey. Sorry.
Darnell, hey.
Yeah, actually, just about to leave.
I was hoping to catch you.
If it's ok, um,
could you give this to Corey for me?
He hasn't been responding to my texts or calls.
You can give him that letter yourself.
You're family to Corey.
This is a family trip.
You should come.
Are... are you sure?
You heard her.
Let's go find Corey.
Love guards the heart from the abyss.
That's Mozart.
And the love you all have for each other
is why you're committed to making this family whole again.
Step one, healing as a unit.
And how many steps are there?
This isn't aa.
There's not a finish line we can just skip ahead to.
Olivia's right. The healing time
is different for every family.
We're all-in,
for rebuilding this family.
Whatever it takes.
Laura, you've been quiet.
Is he right?
Are you all in?
Uh... I'm here.
That's all I have for you right now.
♪ I ain't never gonna quit ♪
♪ and I ain't never giving up, no ♪
♪ I got a real long list ♪
♪ a million things I wanna do ♪
♪ I ain't never gonna quit ♪
Wow. This is dad's?
Yeah.
It was built by his great-grandfather.
That's why they say don't sell grandma's house.
What y'all doing here?
We came to bring you home.
Honestly... I miss my family
and I'm hoping therapy can
help us get back to a healthy place.
Helped me in the past, so...
Um... when my family looks at me now,
I, uh, I can feel their disappointment.
I deserve it and I know that.
I guess I'm hoping that
one day soon, they'll be able to
look at me like they used to
and we can start finding our way
back to happiness.
Except I don't know that
being happy translates to you and mom
staying together.
Maybe it means you don't.
Jordan. What is wrong with you?
Brutal honesty is hard to hear,
but it's what makes family therapy so effective.
Jordan's feelings have value here. Jordan?
I love you both, ok?
But mom cries in the shower at night,
even when she thinks that we can't hear her.
And dad?
You can't let go of your guilt.
From where I'm sitting, you both look terrible.
Being around each other isn't helping
either one of you.
Thank you for sharing, Jordan.
I guess it's my turn.
I am tired of living my life on hold
and as soon as this therapy
or whatever is over,
I would like all of us
to be able to move on.
With or without me?
I don't know.
I'm not going.
You're not even listening, man.
So, how'd y'all figure out
I was sick, anyway?
Turns out Spencer, Dillon, and Darnell
can give the Hardy boys a run for their money.
So, how long you got?
Darnell, chill, man.
Why? Y'all thinking it, too.
You're just too scared to ask.
- What about chemo? - There's no
treating it this time.
Ok, look.
We get that you thought
leaving us in the dark
would spare us the pain of watching you...
the point is, we know now.
So, you can stop trying to play the emotional hero
and come home with us.
Son, this is my life,
my choice.
So, to hell with the rest of us.
I don't want our final memories together
to be of me dying.
I don't want our last memories to be of you
driving off with no good-bye.
So, I guess we at an impasse.
Yo! You guys
gotta check out the back.
Those woods go deep.
All right, boys, go pick a room.
What are you doing?
It was a long drive.
You don't want to leave, we'll stay.
See if we can get through that hard head of yours
by the end of the weekend.
Baby, if he says there's no treatment,
we should listen.
To what?
He's just gonna ignore us the whole time we're here?
Yo! Now, this is some old-school stuff.
Hey, does anybody even use these anymore?
Ha ha. Very funny.
Put that back.
Ok. Everybody say cheese!
Cheese.
Nice. Hey, take one of me.
You gotta give me something goofy, though.
Oh.
Hey, sorry. We were just fooling around.
So, now you apologizing for being happy?
I'm gonna take a walk.
Hey, dad, can we use this camera
when we go camping later?
Nobody going camping, Dillon.
All right? Put it back.
Take your walk, Corey.
The boys and I will lend a hand packing up.
Right, boys?
- Yes, ma'am. - For sure.
Dad, why are you even packing in the first place?
Didn't you just get here?
Dillon, just do as mom says, all right? Let pops rest.
D, why don't you grab this box
and let's get started in the back.
See? That's exactly
what I was trying to avoid.
I don't want anyone's damn pity.
How is that helpful?
Well recalling your fondest family memories
reminds everyone of what
better days felt like.
Orlando.
We were visiting dad during a bye week.
Wizarding world of Harry Potter, yeah.
I'd forgotten about that trip.
I didn't, because Jordan
lost both of our wands.
No. No, no, no, no.
They were... they were magic'ed away.
They fell through the drainage grate
because you stumbled around for an hour
thinking you were drunk after you had butterbeer.
Hey, whoa, at least
I didn't puke all over myself
on the forbidden journey.
You acted like it was totally normal.
Billy, what do you recall?
Nothing, because he wasn't there.
No, I had... i had to work.
You had the day off
but you just stay behind
and study your plays.
Look, the pressures of being in the NFL
were both mental as well as physical.
That's why I stayed behind and... and studied.
So, mom's right.
Football was more important than family?
No. No. I was working for the family.
You three were always a priority.
Really?
Even when you cheated?
- Laura's saying... - I don't need
a damn translator.
Why am I being singled out and attacked?
Because you're the reason we're all here.
All right, I think now
would be a good time for a break.
Billy, Laura, can I have a word?
Bruh, we really gonna spend this whole weekend
tiptoeing around each other in silence?
Just focus on your packing, man.
Are you regretting inviting me along?
I didn't invite you. My moms did.
Ok. So, that's what this is about.
Leave it alone, a'ight?
I came out here to be alone, man.
Look, man... I get it.
You're angry at him. You resent me.
Are you hard of hearing or what?
Clearly, there's things you need to
get off your chest, but you can't
say it to Corey 'cause of everything he's dealing with.
So, just say it to me.
Spencer, trust me.
If you don't get this out now,
you're not gonna be able to enjoy
this weekend with your pops.
Who know how many of these you got left?
A'ight, man.
What was it like growing up with him?
♪ ... your eyes, you said ♪
It was, uh, stable.
And fun.
And definitely frustrating.
How so?
Corey had a very roundabout way
of teaching tough life lessons.
This one time, right,
Corey took me fishing.
It was a hot mess.
Patience ain't really my thing.
So, I kept trying to throw stuff in the water
so the fish could show up sooner.
And he'd get so mad.
Poke me in my chest and say...
"You wanna be that brother
known for taking shortcuts in life? Huh?"
And how fishing was about the long haul,
practicing Patience,
learning how to be at peace with the stillness,
the silence.
Took me months to realize that
he wasn't just talking about fishing.
I ain't never been fishing.
Wasn't nobody to ever take me.
You know, I watched how you handled yourself.
In that 7-on-7 game against south crenshaw.
And all that nonsense with cliff.
That moment I realized
how just like Corey you are.
You may not have grown up with him, bruh,
but you definitely
got the best of him in you.
♪ As we are ♪
♪ fragile as we are ♪
I'm scared, man.
I can't lose him.
Talk to him. Gotta tell him.
You and Corey avoiding y'all's issues all weekend
ain't gonna do either of y'all no good.
I can't believe she gave us homework.
You happy now?
I'm all for unconventional methods
if it gets the job done.
That woman is getting paid $200 an hour, ok,
and the best thing she can come up with
was to make us draw stupid pictures
of what our family actually looks like
versus what our family feels like?
What do you care? It's not your money.
Well, in that case, I say
we go "lord of the flies" with no parents.
Less people to draw, no curfews, right?
You do realize you're about to have a kid
with a girl you barely know.
You might want to take this more seriously.
You're just in time, Spencer.
Look at this.
You cool with us sticking around now?
The walk cleared my head.
If this is gonna be our last weekend
together as a family,
y'all are right, let's make it count.
But you're still not coming home with us.
No, son.
Aha! Oh!
I can't believe I ever fit
in this tiny thing.
Man. Memories.
Here. Yours to keep.
No, thanks. I'm good.
Come on. Take it.
Spencer, I'd really like you to have it.
I don't want no damn Jersey
to remember you by, man.
I want you!
I'm sorry. I... I didn't mean it.
Yes, you did.
And it's finally the first honest thing
that you said to me since you got here.
Don't stop now. Let it out.
I hate that your first instinct
when things get bad is to run.
You know how messed up it is
that we drive all the way out here to get you
and the first words out your mouth
is still no thanks?
How damn selfish are you, man?
This ain't just happening to you.
Son... you want to know
how I'm feeling? All right.
I'm angry. You hear me?
I'm angry. I'm angry!
I'm angry that you're dying
and there ain't nothing I can do about it.
You always leaving us, man.
Leaving me.
And this time, it's gonna be for good.
What the hell am I supposed to do with that?
Everything ok?
Yeah.
What about those raised voices I heard?
Spencer are I were just saying
some things that needed to be said.
Mm-hmm.
I'm sorry, grace.
You want to be more specific
about what for?
I want to apologize for my role
in ending our marriage.
I cheat on you
and you're the one with the apology?
You didn't cheat in a vacuum.
I abandoned our marriage long before
I physically walked out.
You never asked the details
of the affair.
Maybe... getting out the full truth
about that night
will help us let it go once and for all.
Are you sure?
No, I'm not sure
I want to hear the details of your affair.
But I need to.
I mean, can it be worse than
this sordid loop that I keep
playing inside of my head?
But what if it is?
Really?
Worse than asking myself on repeat,
did he fall in love again
or what if it was worse
and he never fell out of love?
Without Laura getting these answers,
it'll be impossible
for you both to emotionally reattach.
It had been 3 weeks.
I was really missing you.
Then you called and said
you weren't coming home,
that you were gonna hang back
and network with the other coaches.
In that moment...
I felt like I wasn't enough.
I don't think you understand.
I... spent my entire life
training to be a professional football player.
And I did it. I was in stadiums,
living out my dream.
And just like that,
I busted my knee and it was over.
The clock had stopped running.
But I was adamant.
I had to keep that clock going.
All right? I was trying to will my knee
back into playing shape,
but every time I failed...
I felt like I was failing you,
like I was failing my family.
And then that night...
That night, you told me you thought
I should quit playing football.
You have no idea how betrayed I felt.
That was the lowest I'd ever been in my life
and my own wife, it felt like she
didn't believe in my dreams anymore.
It felt like you didn't believe in me.
I wasn't giving up on us.
Laura, he's not blaming you.
It's just how he felt.
Ok. It's ok.
I needed to talk to someone who knew
that I couldn't quit playing football.
So... i went to crenshaw.
To see grace.
To see his father.
I was walking to clear my head,
turned a corner,
and Billy was standing there.
Couldn't even bring himself to cross the threshold.
Willie never liked Laura.
Exactly. So, for him to go in there
and tell him what Laura said,
that would just make things worse.
So... i offered him an ear
and he did the same for me.
He told me... That you probably hadn't
gotten past not being able
to play football professionally,
and that you probably never felt worthy,
and was worried that I would stop loving you.
I need you to know
that no matter how upset
or frustrated I got...
I never stopped loving you.
I was too blinded by my own pain
to see what I was putting you through.
So, I did the easy thing
and leaned on an old friend.
Someone who didn't see me as an injured,
washed-up football player.
Right. Like I did.
No. Grace actually understood
why you wanted me to stop playing.
She explained how you saw
what holding onto a shattered dream
was doing to me, but I wasn't
in the right frame of mind to listen
and it just felt like you were
dismissing my entire life's work.
...dismissing me.
When you were gone for work
for those long stints,
I felt abandoned.
Unneeded.
That night...
Billy made me feel needed.
Grace made me feel needed.
One thing led to another.
And we slept together.
You're right.
It was worse.
Hey.
What happened?
Nothing.
I'm fine. I just...
I just need a minute.
Ma, you're not fine.
Spencer... please. Just go.
How many times have you told me and Dillon
that crying is cleansing?
That it's a sign of highly evolved behavior?
That only applies to kids.
Come on.
I'm sorry.
Ma, you don't have to ever apologize
for crying, ok?
That's not why I'm apologizing.
I'm sorry... That a selfish moment
between me and Billy
cost you years with your father,
years that I can never give back
to you or Corey.
But now... Now that Corey...
With Corey being sick...
I'm sorry that you and Dillon
have to grow up with just me.
No, there ain't no "just" about it.
Because of you, I am who I am, ma.
You are why I believe
and fight for my dreams.
The way you raised me is the reason
I'm gonna make it to the super bowl one day.
And when I do, and I win,
it's the reason I'm gonna stand on that podium
and I'm gonna tell the world
that you're my mvp.
You hear me?
Come here.
How did I get so lucky with my boys?
Whoa. When did you become Van gogh?
While I was at rehab, I did art therapy.
- Wow. - It was the one thing
I could do to communicate how
I was actually feeling.
How did I not know you were this talented?
Ok, so, what's your artistic take
on what our family feels like?
Wait, now, Jordan, that's private.
- Jordan! Jordan! - Whoa!
Wait. Why am I not in your family picture?
I mean, it's stick figures, but
at least I made a family portrait, Liv.
It just feels like you're missing
from my life a lot of the time.
What are you talking about? I'm right here, Liv.
Growing up, we were best friends.
Yeah.
Dad was always on the road
and mom worked long hours, but
it didn't matter because we had each other.
And when dad came home after he retired,
you abandoned me,
and you started playing football,
and you made new friends, and it just felt like
you didn't need me anymore.
Liv... look.
Yeah. Ok, when dad came home,
I, I started focusing on football.
You guys always had this special daddy's girl bond
and I didn't have anything
even close to that with him.
So, yeah.
I threw myself into football
to bond with dad, but...
I wasn't trying to shut you out.
Besides, you... You had your whole
new group of friends and you were
doing your partying thing, and
I just assumed that's what you wanted
and left you alone.
You thought I wanted to lose my brother?
My best friend? No.
That was never what I wanted.
This is gonna sound stupid and selfish.
Say it anyway.
I just... i feel like...
I just feel like I'm finally getting you back.
But with the baby coming now, I mean,
you're starting a whole new family with Simone,
which is exactly what you should be doing.
I'm just... I'm just afraid
I'm gonna lose you again.
Hey... you're not gonna lose me.
Ah.
Hey.
What's all this?
Dad's letting us go camping tonight.
You ever tried arguing with this kid?
Losing battle every time.
Found them.
Heads up!
- Ooh! - Nice try, d.
Ain't nothing getting past these magic hands.
- Ok. I see. - Pure skills.
Yeah? We'll see about that.
So, who's up for a game?
Definitely me.
Say the word.
A'ight, let's get it.
Ain't nobody going easy on you, old man.
Music to my ears.
Hey, whatever.
So, what's the rules?
Boy, we in the woods. Ain't no rules.
Oh!
♪ Right, right, 'cause it be all right ♪
♪ 'cause it's already on fire ♪
- Right. - Run a move.
Down, set, hut!
Oh! Oh!
Let it go. Let it go.
Dillon, come here.
- Ahh! - Hey!
Come on, now. Wait a minute.
A'ight, you got mom. You got mom.
Wait a minute. Ok! Ok.
Great. Down. Ten. Hut!
Billy, I know this is hard,
but remember, for you, the affair
happened 9 years ago.
But for Laura, it feels like
it happened yesterday.
I know. I know.
I just wish I knew how to make her believe
how much she means to me.
If she were here right now,
what would you say to her?
You know, I thank you
for everything you've done today.
I feel like this session
should be about over.
Humor me.
Pretend Laura is right there.
I'm not gonna talk to an empty chair.
I can't.
I'm not gonna do it.
Tell me then.
I just heard the twins have probably
the most honest conversation
I have heard in this house
in a really long time.
So, if they're mature enough
to battle through it...
So am I.
Truthfully...
I don't know how to get through
this thing called life without you, Laura.
You push me to be a better man
even when it's so uncomfortable.
That's what you were doing that night,
and, uh... Instead of manning up
and looking into our future,
I... ran back into my past.
I was selfish...
And I'm so sorry I hurt you.
I'm so sorry that I hurt us.
I want to be that man that
you used to be able to depend on.
'Cause I love you more than anything.
And I love the family that we built.
Look, I'm begging you.
Give me one more chance.
Let me make this right.
I'll do whatever it takes.
I believe you.
Hey. Walk with me a minute.
A'ight.
Darnell said something, didn't he?
Better late than never. So, how about it?
You want to go fishing with your old man?
Billy, I can't have another discussion.
I have nothing left.
I know, I know. You don't have to talk.
This is a gift. Uh,
Dr. Gibbs said that before our next session,
we should give each other something meaningful
that, uh, that represented
the depth of our love.
She's real wordy, that Dr. Gibbs.
Yeah.
This book is my gift to you.
No expectations. No demands.
Saved every... every note, every letter
that you slipped into my gym bag,
my sock drawer, my suitcase.
You saved all these?
Yeah.
Um,. There's this one letter.
You wrote me that right after I lost my mother.
The moment I read it,
I knew one day I was gonna make you my wife.
"I just want you to know that I see you,
"I hear you, I feel your pain,
and I'll be here..."
'However long it takes."
And you kept your promise.
You showed up for me.
So, I'm gonna show up for you.
I'm gonna show up for our marriage.
Because... because...
Are you sure about this?
This really all we do when we fish?
Just sit around and watch nothing happen?
Come on, man. Them fish probably
down there clowning us right now.
Fishing ain't really about fishing.
It's about taking the time to just be.
Realigning yourself with nature.
Practicing Patience.
Ah, the infamous speech.
It's a chance to center your thoughts.
My thoughts are centered, all right.
They centered on how hungry I'ma be
if we don't catch something to grill real soon.
What you centering your thoughts on?
Dying.
I'm scared to die alone.
You don't have to.
You got a family. You hear me?
Let us be there for you, man.
Come home with us.
Look how good today turned out.
All of us together.
Hey, look, maybe it's wishful thinking,
but you even look better.
Having us around is good for you, pop.
And when the cancer takes over,
and the days ain't so good,
we're gonna get through those together, too.
You hear me?
Don't think nobody feeling sorry for you, neither.
I'm being selfish.
I want you to come home for me and Dillon.
Having you around makes our lives better.
You know... One of the things
I love most about you
is how willingly you show
your vulnerability.
I was never taught that.
I was always taught to Bury it and run.
It's an honor and a blessing
to learn from my own son
that there's strength in vulnerability.
- Promise me something. - Anything.
Promise you'll instill that in your brother, too.
I will, pop. I promise.
I love you, son.
♪ Try till your dying breath ♪
♪ to hold on to happiness ♪
♪ 'cause life's just a moment ♪
♪ and one day it's over ♪
♪ and it's cruel how the time can pass ♪
♪ the deepest rivers move so fast ♪
♪ and life's just a moment ♪
- ♪ so, know when it's golden ♪ - what, what, what?
- Yo, what'd I do, bro? - ♪ hold on, hold on, hold on ♪
♪ hold on to happiness ♪
Come on. There you go.
Hey.
Look at you.
This is the most at peace I've felt
in a long time.
Thank you for bringing the boys.
You're welcome.
Hold on a minute. I'll be right back.
What's this?
It's the deed to the cabin.
I'm leaving it to Spencer and Dillon.
Hopefully, they'll pass it on
to their kids one day.
Part of the James legacy.
I'll make sure they do.
It's kind of a weird coincidence,
you giving me this.
See, I, uh... I came out here
to give you something.
He's mine?
Dillon is your son.
Today's gonna be a great day.
I can feel it.
Yeah.
We should wake the boys up
if we're gonna finish getting this place
packed up before we hit the road.
"We"?
If you got room for me in crenshaw.
I'd like to come home.
There's always room for you.
Wow, the squirrels in Cali are huge.
It's not like that in Nevada.
Really? You ain't gonna eat this, though, right?
Hey, I wouldn't touch his food, man.
Yeah! Back off the bacon!
- You mean this bacon? - Yeah, I mean that bacon.
Yeah. Thank you. Yeah... oh, really?
I thought you meant this bacon.
Oh! Oh, so, you think that's funny.
♪ Sometimes I'm... Sometimes I'm... ♪
♪ Sometimes... ♪ there it is, there it is.
♪ I've been... ♪
My bad. I forgot that Jersey
you gave me, that gift.
Don't worry. I'll grab it for you.
- You sure? - Yeah.
I think it's on the living room table.
Talk about weak.
Carrying out one box, man.
You lazy. You don't carry nothing.
- Lazy? - There's the last box.
You know that's not gonna fit, right?
Let me try.
Ma, I'm telling you...
ah-ah-ah. There's a method to my madness.
Oh.
Told you.
You didn't say... man, shut up.
All right, Ms. James.
Hey, I got shotgun in dad's car.
The hell you do... I already called it.
What? Nobody wants to ride with me?
No offense, ma, but there was grandmas
passing you on the 10.
Excuse me for being safe.
Hey, what's taking so long, old man?
Hey, pops, let's roll.
Dad?
Dad! Hey.
Hey, come on. Come on.
Come on!
- Oh, my god, come here. - Dad.
Aaaah!
Greg, move your head.