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Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
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Once bread becomes toast,
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it can never
become bread again.
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Once you've made a mistake,
you look at that moment.
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00:00:19,162 --> 00:00:20,396
You think of everything
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that you could have
done differently,
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00:00:21,465 --> 00:00:23,767
but that moment is gone.
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Every yes instead of no,
every left instead of right.
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My life could have changed.
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00:00:29,706 --> 00:00:34,377
Like, I had this cute
redhead crush from my art class
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named Stephanie
handcuffed to my bedpost
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at my parents' house.
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I couldn't have been a day
over 16, and she was older.
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I know
because she drove us there.
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And...
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Redheads were like
this county fair cotton candy.
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It started as a joke, really.
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I had these handcuffs
that I lost the key to,
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but I taught myself
how to pick them.
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Well, the truth is,
I had no idea
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what to do with a hot girl.
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I thought I did,
and handcuffs were like
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these dirty-sounding things
for some reason.
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Anyway, I've got
this hot redhead
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chained to my bed,
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And I slowly work up the nerve,
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not to kiss her
like some smooth guy,
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but to dive headlong
into taking her shirt off,
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button by button,
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like
the greatest Christmas present
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a Jewish boy ever had.
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And I'm just hypnotized
by these sweet little bubblegum
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pink nipples that are so hard,
they're ready to bounce off
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these milky white,
slightly tan,
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lightly freckled titties
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that are pointing up
towards the sky.
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Ahh.
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So I move in slowly,
just planning my attack,
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thinking about everything
I'm gonna do,
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each button closer,
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like my life is going
to spring forward
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into having meaning
for the first time,
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because as far as I know,
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I'm about to bang the shit
out of this really hot redhead.
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Every American boy's dream.
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And then I hear my parents' car
crunching gravel outside.
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Then I hear my sister's voice
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calling as she's
coming up the stairs.
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Now, have you ever tried
to pick a tiny handcuff lock
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00:02:06,569 --> 00:02:08,071
while you have a raging boner
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and thinking about where you're
gonna hide a hot redhead?
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I tell you, it can't be done.
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So, my sister comes
barreling up the stairs,
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tries to walk in,
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and I jam the door
shut with my foot.
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But it's too late.
She can already see
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the pair of feet
that are tied to the bed.
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It's not like she doesn't know
I have a girl in my room
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or that she doesn't recognize
the car outside, right?
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So, she is such a tattletale.
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She runs downstairs,
yells to my mother,
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"Michael's got Stephanie
tied to his bed,
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and he won't open the door."
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Stephanie is just mortified
and freaked out.
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I think
about every little thing
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that I could have done
differently
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not to get caught, but...
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you know, there's no choice,
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and it's not I can
jump out of the window.
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So I throw on my jeans.
I go downstairs.
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Stephanie waits upstairs.
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I see my parents
at the dining table
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in their swivel chairs
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like some job interview.
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They're just shaking their
disappointed mom and dad heads.
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I don't deny anything because,
you know, what's the point?
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I just wait
for the hammer to drop.
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Wait for them to start
screaming and shouting.
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But after a long,
awkward silence,
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you know what they do?
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They look at each other,
they look at me.
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My mom reaches
into her purse and grabs $10
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and tells me to take
Stephanie to Burger King.
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Could have been a fucking
commercial from Burger King,
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come to think of it.
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Michael, tell me
what happened.
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So I took her
to Burger King.
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- I'm sorry?
- What?
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- I need you to listen to me.
- Okay.
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I'm going to have
to cut you off.
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You're not listening to me.
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Focus.
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I'm sorry,
what was the question?
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Can you recall exactly
how it was that you died?
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- What?
- I want you to concentrate.
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Think very hard, please.
What is your very last memory?
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Try to reach out
and pull it in.
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What happened?
What?
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Keep going, keep going.
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- No, I see it.
- Excuse us.
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- And it's delayed.
- Ugh! After all that?
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After all that.
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I'm getting a drink.
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- Oh, Jesus.
- What? Don't even.
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I didn't say anything.
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My iPhone said the flight
was on time.
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Yeah, well, we don't really
control the apps here,
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just the official board
behind me.
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"Just the official board
behind her."
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Sorry.
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I don't even know
why I'm doing this.
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I just had a family trip
three weeks ago.
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My family, which is bad enough.
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Your family is your family,
not my family.
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We should get back.
The plane should be boarding.
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Yeah.
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I can't do this.
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It's not right with us, and you
want me to pretend that it is.
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I did that for 10 years
in my marriage,
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and I'm not doing it again
with you.
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I'm sorry.
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You're not gonna
say anything to me?
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Amy.
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We will now begin boarding
for service to Pittsburgh.
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All active military...
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- Amy, I just...
- ...any disabled people,
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and all Ruby Class
and Gold Class club members.
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- Amy, just...
- We will now begin boarding
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rows one through eight
for service to Pittsburgh.
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Amy, please just see
how you feel
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when you get there, okay?
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No, I'm sorry.
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I'm gonna get a cab
back to the apartment.
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Just go without me, go have fun
with your parents, okay?
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Uh, wait.
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- Sorry.
- It's fine.
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How many times
do I have to tell you
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not to touch people?
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Why does it look like
you're smiling?
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You think this is funny?
Is that what you think?
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I'm not smiling, okay?
Just...
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I knew when you ordered
two vodka sodas,
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you weren't going
to get on that plane.
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Oh, you think this has to do
with my drinking?
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- Yeah.
- Well, whatever.
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This is not
because of my drinking.
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- Okay.
- Okay?
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I've been thinking about this
for a long time.
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You don't have anything else
to say to me?
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Just seems funny that
if one plane isn't delayed
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for an hour,
we don't break up.
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One little connecting flight
from Dallas isn't late.
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Maybe one little engine problem
is the difference
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between you and I staring into
the eyes of our grandchildren
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and being buried together
50 years from now
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or you getting in a cab
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and going home
to a new life without me.
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No.
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This would have happened
back at your parents' condo
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or back home, okay?
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- Maybe you're right.
- Or...
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Okay.
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You're not serious.
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Jesus.
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So you guys broke up?
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And this time
I'm gonna hold her to it.
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For real this time?
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I told her the next drunk
panic breakup was it.
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- Are you sure?
- Christ.
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I just realized I don't have
any money for the toll.
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Goddamn toll is only
a goddamn quarter.
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- You don't have any money?
- Nope, don't have a quarter.
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Yeah, nope, thought
I was getting on the plane.
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- Man.
- Now I've got to get off
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00:08:01,724 --> 00:08:04,828
the goddamn exit
and go to the ATM.
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I can't believe this, man.
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Are you still there?
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00:08:11,534 --> 00:08:14,070
- Yeah, and I missed the ramp.
- Where are you?
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00:08:14,203 --> 00:08:15,804
Yeah, I just
gotta back up now.
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00:08:15,938 --> 00:08:17,007
- On the highway?
- Uh-huh, on the highway.
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00:08:17,140 --> 00:08:18,074
Shush.
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00:08:18,208 --> 00:08:19,708
- You're doing what?
- What?
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In the middle
of a fucking highway?
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Are you crazy?
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I hope you're all right.
None of my business.
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Do what you want,
which you will.
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That's really the last thing
I remember.
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I think that's all.
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00:08:36,625 --> 00:08:38,861
Let me think.
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00:08:38,994 --> 00:08:42,465
Try to remember.
You can do it.
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00:08:42,598 --> 00:08:44,934
Open your mind.
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00:08:45,067 --> 00:08:46,802
I still have this quarter.
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00:08:46,936 --> 00:08:49,473
Where did you get
that quarter?
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Picked it up.
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00:08:51,206 --> 00:08:55,577
You picked up the quarter.
And then what do you remember?
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00:08:55,711 --> 00:08:58,413
That I hit something?
197
00:08:58,547 --> 00:08:59,948
Think it through, Michael.
198
00:09:00,082 --> 00:09:03,552
It's easier if you figure it
out for yourself.
199
00:09:03,686 --> 00:09:05,687
Something hit my car.
200
00:09:05,821 --> 00:09:09,292
A truck hit your car.
201
00:09:09,426 --> 00:09:12,362
What's the very next thing
you remember?
202
00:09:12,494 --> 00:09:13,995
Sitting right here.
203
00:09:14,129 --> 00:09:16,999
I told you about the redhead.
204
00:09:18,301 --> 00:09:20,902
I knew you'd get it.
Very good.
205
00:09:22,973 --> 00:09:25,909
- Am I in a hospital?
- No.
206
00:09:26,042 --> 00:09:29,011
- Are you a doctor?
- No, I'm not a doctor.
207
00:09:29,144 --> 00:09:31,880
This isn't a hospital.
I am here to help you.
208
00:09:32,014 --> 00:09:33,383
My name is Scarlett.
209
00:09:33,516 --> 00:09:35,484
Okay, Scarlett.
Am I in rehab or something?
210
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:36,652
I mean, I wasn't drinking.
211
00:09:36,786 --> 00:09:38,922
Think, Michael.
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00:09:39,055 --> 00:09:42,425
Remember,
and then hold on to the memory
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00:09:42,557 --> 00:09:44,326
and bring it back with you.
214
00:09:44,460 --> 00:09:46,897
It's important.
215
00:09:50,867 --> 00:09:53,469
Am I in heaven or something?
216
00:09:53,603 --> 00:09:54,771
You're dead, Michael,
217
00:09:54,903 --> 00:09:57,773
and I am very sorry about that.
218
00:09:57,907 --> 00:10:00,643
You have
my deepest condolences.
219
00:10:00,777 --> 00:10:01,911
But you're not finished yet.
220
00:10:02,043 --> 00:10:04,246
There are some loose ends.
221
00:10:04,379 --> 00:10:07,316
What are you talking
about, "loose ends?"
222
00:10:07,450 --> 00:10:08,685
Wait.
223
00:10:08,819 --> 00:10:11,354
No, no, I can't be dead.
I got stuff to do.
224
00:10:11,488 --> 00:10:13,089
- No.
- No, no.
225
00:10:13,223 --> 00:10:15,491
I got a one man-show I'm doing.
Opening night is coming up.
226
00:10:15,624 --> 00:10:17,126
No.
227
00:10:17,259 --> 00:10:19,961
How long have I been here?
I've got to get home.
228
00:10:20,095 --> 00:10:21,330
I've got to take care
of Banshee, my cat.
229
00:10:21,464 --> 00:10:22,999
You're not thinking
this through.
230
00:10:23,132 --> 00:10:24,334
Oh, yeah.
Yes, I am.
231
00:10:24,466 --> 00:10:26,035
I am thinking this
all the way through, okay?
232
00:10:26,168 --> 00:10:28,603
I can't be dead, all right?
I have obligations.
233
00:10:28,738 --> 00:10:31,241
Can I make a call?
Where's my phone?
234
00:10:31,374 --> 00:10:34,577
God dammit!
Ah!
235
00:10:34,710 --> 00:10:35,979
What happened?
236
00:10:36,111 --> 00:10:38,680
- You are dead.
- Huh.
237
00:10:38,815 --> 00:10:40,617
But you have left
238
00:10:40,750 --> 00:10:43,452
one important detail
unfinished.
239
00:10:43,586 --> 00:10:46,455
Oh.
Oh, shit.
240
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,458
I'm not religious.
241
00:10:49,593 --> 00:10:50,627
Not that.
242
00:10:50,759 --> 00:10:53,128
I'm talking
about your soul mate.
243
00:10:53,262 --> 00:10:54,531
I mean,
my parents were Jewish,
244
00:10:54,663 --> 00:10:56,633
but we had a Christmas tree.
245
00:10:56,766 --> 00:10:57,634
Couldn't call it
a Christmas tree.
246
00:10:57,767 --> 00:10:59,232
It was very confusing.
247
00:10:59,234 --> 00:11:01,270
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
My soul, did you say?
248
00:11:01,403 --> 00:11:04,773
Not your soul.
Your soul mate.
249
00:11:04,907 --> 00:11:08,811
Unfortunately, you died single.
250
00:11:08,945 --> 00:11:11,848
That left your soul incomplete.
251
00:11:11,980 --> 00:11:13,316
So?
252
00:11:13,450 --> 00:11:16,085
Well, that's a problem.
I'm sorry.
253
00:11:16,219 --> 00:11:17,521
Come to think of it,
254
00:11:17,653 --> 00:11:19,388
my girlfriend
did just break up with me.
255
00:11:19,522 --> 00:11:25,527
Souls cross over in pairs
and only in pairs.
256
00:11:25,662 --> 00:11:27,897
You have to find a soul mate.
257
00:11:28,031 --> 00:11:30,166
You're kidding.
How?
258
00:11:30,300 --> 00:11:32,835
It's not as difficult
as it might sound,
259
00:11:32,969 --> 00:11:35,972
but it can be daunting
for some people.
260
00:11:36,105 --> 00:11:38,173
You don't say.
People are weirded out by this?
261
00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:41,577
Some people have trouble
adjusting to being dead.
262
00:11:41,710 --> 00:11:44,046
And then, yes, the dating.
263
00:11:44,180 --> 00:11:46,282
- You're serious.
- You need to focus.
264
00:11:46,416 --> 00:11:47,883
You realize I've been dating
my whole life
265
00:11:48,017 --> 00:11:49,251
without much success?
266
00:11:49,384 --> 00:11:51,953
Yes, and that's why
we're here now.
267
00:11:52,088 --> 00:11:54,090
The soul mate cliché
is quite real.
268
00:11:54,223 --> 00:11:56,592
That's why everyone makes
such a big deal about it,
269
00:11:56,725 --> 00:12:00,329
whether they know it on
some subconscious level or not.
270
00:12:00,463 --> 00:12:03,567
You'll have to find one
before you go on,
271
00:12:03,700 --> 00:12:05,435
or there won't be any going on.
272
00:12:05,567 --> 00:12:06,836
Go on to what?
273
00:12:06,970 --> 00:12:09,138
You'll find out
once you find someone.
274
00:12:09,272 --> 00:12:11,607
Souls come in alone,
but they go out in pairs.
275
00:12:11,739 --> 00:12:13,142
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
276
00:12:13,276 --> 00:12:16,479
It is the purpose,
the secret,
277
00:12:16,613 --> 00:12:19,082
the meaning of life,
you might say.
278
00:12:19,215 --> 00:12:21,450
You realize this is
fucked up, right?
279
00:12:21,584 --> 00:12:23,285
I mean, what about
little kids who died,
280
00:12:23,418 --> 00:12:26,154
or people who get married
three times?
281
00:12:26,288 --> 00:12:27,590
I mean, who do they
move on with?
282
00:12:27,724 --> 00:12:30,059
I'm not gonna argue
with you, Michael.
283
00:12:31,327 --> 00:12:34,997
Wait.
So I die...
284
00:12:35,130 --> 00:12:36,798
then I have to meet a girl.
285
00:12:36,932 --> 00:12:39,200
It doesn't have to be a girl.
It doesn't have to be a guy.
286
00:12:39,335 --> 00:12:41,804
It just has to be
the right person for you.
287
00:12:41,937 --> 00:12:45,341
And they have to feel
the same way too, or no go.
288
00:12:45,475 --> 00:12:47,643
People go their whole lives
without finding
289
00:12:47,777 --> 00:12:49,177
- the right person.
- Yes.
290
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:50,912
And then they end up here
in my office
291
00:12:51,047 --> 00:12:52,480
muttering about redheads
292
00:12:52,614 --> 00:12:54,182
and asking what happened
till I get them to focus.
293
00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:56,286
- Uh-huh.
- This can take time.
294
00:12:56,418 --> 00:12:59,321
So like, find
a simultaneous orgasm or bust?
295
00:12:59,455 --> 00:13:02,090
Exactly, but without the sex.
296
00:13:02,225 --> 00:13:04,326
Sex clouds the mind,
so we've unclouded it for you.
297
00:13:04,460 --> 00:13:05,261
Thank you.
298
00:13:05,393 --> 00:13:07,062
Clarity is gonna come in handy.
299
00:13:07,196 --> 00:13:08,431
You'll see.
300
00:13:08,564 --> 00:13:09,933
I mean...
301
00:13:10,066 --> 00:13:11,499
Where do I even start?
302
00:13:11,633 --> 00:13:14,135
Just remember,
things are different here.
303
00:13:14,269 --> 00:13:16,239
Removing those things
allows you to focus
304
00:13:16,373 --> 00:13:18,074
on what's really important.
305
00:13:18,206 --> 00:13:21,009
So I just ask
dead girls on dates?
306
00:13:21,143 --> 00:13:23,345
Sure.
Why not?
307
00:13:23,479 --> 00:13:24,513
Great.
308
00:13:24,647 --> 00:13:26,116
Are you free for dinner?
309
00:13:26,249 --> 00:13:28,651
I have a soul mate, Michael,
and I've already crossed over.
310
00:13:28,784 --> 00:13:30,653
You're not the first person
to make that joke,
311
00:13:30,787 --> 00:13:33,489
and I can tell you
it just keeps getting funnier.
312
00:13:33,623 --> 00:13:35,090
Now, you have to go.
313
00:13:35,224 --> 00:13:36,825
I have literally
tens of thousands
314
00:13:36,959 --> 00:13:38,294
of appointments today.
315
00:13:38,427 --> 00:13:41,196
So, there's an afterlife,
and you've moved on,
316
00:13:41,330 --> 00:13:43,566
but while you're here,
you have a job?
317
00:13:43,700 --> 00:13:45,167
Yes.
318
00:13:45,301 --> 00:13:46,402
Just sounds like you got
a raw deal here, I mean...
319
00:13:46,536 --> 00:13:48,104
I'm here to help you,
Michael.
320
00:13:48,238 --> 00:13:50,239
I want to be here.
321
00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:52,408
You have to go.
322
00:13:52,541 --> 00:13:53,542
Go where?
323
00:13:53,676 --> 00:13:56,179
The entire world
and all the infinite fish
324
00:13:56,311 --> 00:13:59,547
in the sea are
through that door behind you.
325
00:13:59,681 --> 00:14:01,316
All the rotting fish
in the sea.
326
00:14:01,450 --> 00:14:03,252
You can go anywhere
you want to,
327
00:14:03,385 --> 00:14:05,154
see anything you want to,
328
00:14:05,287 --> 00:14:08,090
and be your truest self
for the first time.
329
00:14:08,224 --> 00:14:12,027
No one in the living world
can see you or stop you.
330
00:14:12,161 --> 00:14:14,631
With the exception
of not being able to eat
331
00:14:14,763 --> 00:14:16,331
and a few other limitations,
332
00:14:16,465 --> 00:14:18,133
the world is
your private sandbox.
333
00:14:18,267 --> 00:14:21,371
- Is my mother in on this?
- You should get started.
334
00:14:21,503 --> 00:14:23,273
It's time.
335
00:14:24,407 --> 00:14:26,941
- And if I have any questions?
- You're on your own,
336
00:14:27,075 --> 00:14:28,945
until you're no longer
on your own.
337
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:31,480
I'll see you when you're ready.
338
00:14:48,764 --> 00:14:49,931
Wait.
339
00:14:57,071 --> 00:14:59,207
Hello?
340
00:15:16,325 --> 00:15:18,194
This sucks.
341
00:15:47,288 --> 00:15:49,057
I'll never get used
to not having a phone.
342
00:15:49,191 --> 00:15:50,191
I mean, how do I find anything?
343
00:15:50,325 --> 00:15:52,561
Like literally anything?
344
00:15:52,695 --> 00:15:55,198
You know what?
This is great.
345
00:15:55,330 --> 00:15:57,298
Women love men who fish around
in their pockets
346
00:15:57,432 --> 00:16:00,168
and talk to themselves.
347
00:16:02,671 --> 00:16:04,073
Come on, ladies.
348
00:16:22,325 --> 00:16:24,993
Hey, buddy,
can I ask you a question?
349
00:16:25,127 --> 00:16:26,128
No?
350
00:16:29,932 --> 00:16:32,167
Hello?
351
00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:34,803
Anybody?
352
00:16:35,336 --> 00:16:37,639
Nobody, really?
353
00:16:56,291 --> 00:16:59,061
Oh, thank you,
fucking God.
354
00:16:59,195 --> 00:17:02,164
Mwah!
Okay.
355
00:17:07,602 --> 00:17:10,938
Yeah!
At least we have that!
356
00:17:13,042 --> 00:17:17,312
Oh, yeah.
Hello ladies.
357
00:17:18,112 --> 00:17:20,182
Sorry.
358
00:17:20,315 --> 00:17:22,050
Whoop.
359
00:17:22,184 --> 00:17:23,219
You'll do.
360
00:17:27,889 --> 00:17:30,559
Yeah! Needed that.
361
00:17:33,596 --> 00:17:34,930
Hey, what's the matter?
362
00:17:35,063 --> 00:17:36,965
You never seen a dead guy
get drunk before?
363
00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:40,034
Shoot, I'm too gone, right?
364
00:17:41,771 --> 00:17:43,339
Oh, yeah!
365
00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:46,542
I never liked you anyway.
366
00:17:48,744 --> 00:17:51,347
I never liked any of you!
367
00:17:51,481 --> 00:17:54,217
That's why we're here, right?
368
00:17:54,350 --> 00:17:56,519
Nobody loved us.
We're all single.
369
00:17:58,821 --> 00:18:00,422
Hey, you know what?
370
00:18:00,555 --> 00:18:01,889
Round of drinks
for all my
371
00:18:02,023 --> 00:18:04,327
dearly departed friends.
372
00:18:08,930 --> 00:18:10,098
Hey buddy, excuse me.
373
00:18:10,232 --> 00:18:11,634
Fuck off.
374
00:18:11,766 --> 00:18:13,635
No, I was just gonna
ask you a question.
375
00:18:13,769 --> 00:18:15,939
What part of "fuck off"
don't you understand?
376
00:18:16,071 --> 00:18:18,474
You deaf, dumb and dead?
Eh?
377
00:18:18,608 --> 00:18:20,243
Want to hear it
in another language?
378
00:18:20,376 --> 00:18:22,645
Hablo el "fuck off" -o?
379
00:18:34,423 --> 00:18:37,026
Hey, there.
Hi.
380
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,962
I'm Mike.
What's your name?
381
00:18:40,094 --> 00:18:44,866
Just trying to make
a little conversation.
382
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:45,934
Hey, there.
383
00:18:46,068 --> 00:18:47,470
Hey, I'm Mike.
384
00:18:47,602 --> 00:18:49,937
Hey!
Nice pajamas.
385
00:18:50,071 --> 00:18:54,376
Did you die in your sleep
or you just lazy?
386
00:18:54,510 --> 00:18:56,779
You can talk to me.
387
00:19:01,350 --> 00:19:04,887
So how do I find my soul mate
if no one will talk to me?
388
00:19:05,021 --> 00:19:06,122
I'm trying to play along.
389
00:19:06,254 --> 00:19:07,156
I don't know
why you're complaining.
390
00:19:07,290 --> 00:19:09,225
We all got the same problem.
391
00:19:09,358 --> 00:19:10,926
Thank you.
You talked to me.
392
00:19:11,060 --> 00:19:13,329
Please, no.
I need to know what's going on.
393
00:19:13,462 --> 00:19:15,097
I need to talk to somebody,
anybody, please.
394
00:19:15,230 --> 00:19:16,565
It's New York.
395
00:19:16,698 --> 00:19:18,033
Even when you're alive,
no one wants to talk to you,
396
00:19:18,167 --> 00:19:20,468
especially
when you look desperate.
397
00:19:20,601 --> 00:19:23,571
So what do I do?
398
00:19:23,705 --> 00:19:26,609
Listen, you had the same
counseling we all did, right?
399
00:19:26,743 --> 00:19:28,210
Well, it all sucks.
It sucks for us all.
400
00:19:28,342 --> 00:19:30,513
You just got to get through it.
401
00:19:30,646 --> 00:19:34,249
It's like hell on Earth.
They call it dating.
402
00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:37,119
- Yeah, well, what's the point?
- Who said there's a point?
403
00:19:37,252 --> 00:19:40,022
Just think about love
and forever.
404
00:19:40,156 --> 00:19:43,158
And what would you say to
the girl if it really mattered?
405
00:19:43,292 --> 00:19:44,926
What would you say?
406
00:19:48,363 --> 00:19:50,332
I have no idea where to go.
407
00:19:50,465 --> 00:19:51,633
Yep.
408
00:19:51,767 --> 00:19:53,969
Get in line
with the rest of us, buddy.
409
00:19:55,036 --> 00:19:56,071
Wait.
410
00:19:56,205 --> 00:19:57,473
How do I find someone
411
00:19:57,606 --> 00:19:59,442
if I don't see anybody
most of the time?
412
00:19:59,574 --> 00:20:01,076
Come on, don't be dumb.
413
00:20:01,209 --> 00:20:05,680
Just squint really hard,
and you see whoever you want.
414
00:20:05,813 --> 00:20:08,650
Work on it.
It gets easier.
415
00:20:08,783 --> 00:20:10,686
Squint?
416
00:20:11,686 --> 00:20:15,389
Squinting to see people.
417
00:20:20,462 --> 00:20:22,196
Urgh!
418
00:20:23,899 --> 00:20:25,534
Whoa!
419
00:20:26,301 --> 00:20:27,803
Yes!
420
00:20:28,471 --> 00:20:30,205
Saw you!
421
00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,111
I see you.
422
00:20:36,946 --> 00:20:38,580
It works.
423
00:20:41,716 --> 00:20:42,984
Are you alive or dead here?
424
00:20:43,118 --> 00:20:44,921
Because I really can't get
a read on it.
425
00:21:40,542 --> 00:21:43,011
Always heads.
426
00:21:47,183 --> 00:21:51,520
Heads.
I lose again.
427
00:21:58,392 --> 00:22:00,896
This is so unreal.
428
00:22:20,750 --> 00:22:23,919
Where would I go if I was
the girl of my dreams?
429
00:22:37,532 --> 00:22:39,801
Excuse me.
430
00:22:41,536 --> 00:22:43,104
Could you even look at me?
431
00:22:43,237 --> 00:22:45,606
- I'm waiting for someone else.
- Someone else?
432
00:22:45,741 --> 00:22:47,076
Anyone else.
433
00:22:47,208 --> 00:22:49,477
How do you know it's not
worth talking to me?
434
00:22:49,610 --> 00:22:52,947
Educated guess,
life experience.
435
00:22:53,081 --> 00:22:54,782
Was it because of the
polite way I said "excuse me"?
436
00:22:54,917 --> 00:22:57,419
All right, fine.
437
00:22:57,552 --> 00:23:01,189
So, small talk.
How did you die?
438
00:23:01,323 --> 00:23:02,690
Isn't that kind of personal?
439
00:23:02,824 --> 00:23:05,126
I was hit by a truck.
You?
440
00:23:06,094 --> 00:23:08,462
Mountain climbing.
What did you do with your time?
441
00:23:08,597 --> 00:23:09,965
Is that little laugh
supposed to mean
442
00:23:10,099 --> 00:23:11,567
that you died
better than I did?
443
00:23:11,701 --> 00:23:13,001
I mean, you could have
been hit by a truck.
444
00:23:13,135 --> 00:23:14,603
You ever cross
the street before?
445
00:23:14,735 --> 00:23:17,272
- I have to go.
- I was an actor.
446
00:23:17,406 --> 00:23:20,775
And you?
447
00:23:20,909 --> 00:23:23,611
Founded
an international charity.
448
00:23:23,744 --> 00:23:25,013
Of course you did.
449
00:23:25,147 --> 00:23:26,148
Listen.
450
00:23:26,281 --> 00:23:28,317
I'm sure you're a great guy
in your own way
451
00:23:28,449 --> 00:23:30,484
and probably charming,
452
00:23:30,619 --> 00:23:32,454
but that doesn't really
go far here.
453
00:23:32,588 --> 00:23:33,888
You can't just hook up.
454
00:23:34,022 --> 00:23:35,456
I didn't say I wanted to.
455
00:23:35,590 --> 00:23:37,025
"Good enough"
isn't good enough here.
456
00:23:37,158 --> 00:23:39,995
- So, I'm not even worth a try?
- Not for me.
457
00:23:40,128 --> 00:23:42,598
Listen, this is not like
the world we're used to.
458
00:23:42,732 --> 00:23:44,066
There's nothing good on TV.
459
00:23:44,198 --> 00:23:47,369
There's nothing on TV.
It's literally blank.
460
00:23:47,503 --> 00:23:48,403
Blank.
461
00:23:48,536 --> 00:23:50,705
- TV is blank?
- Mm.
462
00:23:50,839 --> 00:23:51,907
We're like dogs.
463
00:23:52,041 --> 00:23:53,742
It's on,
but we don't really see it.
464
00:23:53,876 --> 00:23:57,012
Why do I not find that
reassuring?
465
00:23:57,145 --> 00:23:59,948
Look around you.
Everything here is weird.
466
00:24:00,081 --> 00:24:02,251
But at least we have alcohol.
467
00:24:02,385 --> 00:24:05,420
It doesn't ease the pain
of talking to people.
468
00:24:05,553 --> 00:24:07,188
No offense.
469
00:24:07,322 --> 00:24:10,225
How has somebody
not snatched you up yet?
470
00:24:11,694 --> 00:24:13,462
It's not that simple.
471
00:24:13,594 --> 00:24:14,896
Listen, when you're
here long enough,
472
00:24:15,030 --> 00:24:17,866
you'll learn to see
when the spark isn't there.
473
00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:20,267
All right, so what am I
supposed to do?
474
00:24:20,401 --> 00:24:21,869
Find some girl.
475
00:24:22,003 --> 00:24:23,571
I don't know,
but just don't think
476
00:24:23,705 --> 00:24:25,206
like you're trying
to get her in bed.
477
00:24:25,340 --> 00:24:28,176
Don't talk about TV or trivia
or politics or food
478
00:24:28,310 --> 00:24:30,579
or any of that shit that used
to mean something.
479
00:24:30,712 --> 00:24:32,080
Like... sports.
480
00:24:32,214 --> 00:24:34,782
Nobody here wants to see
your baseball card collection,
481
00:24:34,917 --> 00:24:37,586
your ex-wife, your job.
482
00:24:37,718 --> 00:24:40,321
It's all gone, all equal.
483
00:24:40,455 --> 00:24:41,790
Unless I was an actor,
484
00:24:41,924 --> 00:24:44,359
which, in that case,
fuck me, right?
485
00:24:44,493 --> 00:24:46,662
You're here to find
the person
486
00:24:46,795 --> 00:24:50,565
that you didn't find in life
to spend eternity with.
487
00:24:50,698 --> 00:24:52,400
Eternity is
a long fucking time.
488
00:24:52,533 --> 00:24:55,236
I mean, I don't even know
what I have left to offer.
489
00:24:55,370 --> 00:24:58,540
Then pour yourself
a tall, stiff drink
490
00:24:58,673 --> 00:25:01,377
and wait it out.
491
00:25:01,510 --> 00:25:02,978
I've got to at least try.
492
00:25:03,110 --> 00:25:05,813
I guess, I mean... don't I?
493
00:25:05,946 --> 00:25:08,215
It's up to you.
I mean...
494
00:25:08,350 --> 00:25:10,686
Take a look around you.
495
00:25:10,819 --> 00:25:13,222
Why are you in a bar?
496
00:25:13,355 --> 00:25:15,458
Where else is there?
497
00:25:15,590 --> 00:25:19,794
Hopefully, for you,
something more.
498
00:25:21,562 --> 00:25:23,264
What about for you?
499
00:25:23,398 --> 00:25:28,204
What would you offer a girl
like me if you had the chance?
500
00:25:28,337 --> 00:25:30,305
You know that funny tingling
feeling you get
501
00:25:30,438 --> 00:25:33,475
when some guy's jerking off
to the memory of the night
502
00:25:33,608 --> 00:25:34,877
you looked your best?
503
00:25:35,010 --> 00:25:36,645
On a good night,
I could remind you of that.
504
00:25:36,779 --> 00:25:38,446
Yeah, okay.
505
00:25:38,580 --> 00:25:40,616
On a bad night, I could
at least make you laugh.
506
00:25:40,750 --> 00:25:41,616
Mm.
507
00:25:41,750 --> 00:25:43,318
Hey!
Hey.
508
00:25:43,452 --> 00:25:46,855
How about heads, you stay
and have another drink with me?
509
00:25:46,988 --> 00:25:49,725
Tails, I'll leave you alone?
510
00:25:49,858 --> 00:25:51,025
No, thanks.
511
00:25:51,159 --> 00:25:55,363
Your misogyny
overwhelms all other charms.
512
00:25:56,764 --> 00:25:58,800
It was gonna be tails anyway.
513
00:26:37,906 --> 00:26:40,576
Jesus, Mary
and Johnny Weissmuller.
514
00:26:41,243 --> 00:26:44,412
What do I gotta do
to get out of this town?
515
00:27:25,553 --> 00:27:27,421
Sorry.
516
00:27:31,726 --> 00:27:33,262
Wait.
517
00:27:34,061 --> 00:27:35,563
Wait, what was...
518
00:27:37,599 --> 00:27:39,301
Hello?
519
00:27:41,802 --> 00:27:43,905
Hello?
520
00:27:57,819 --> 00:27:59,854
Wow.
521
00:28:14,069 --> 00:28:15,870
All right.
How's this go again?
522
00:28:16,003 --> 00:28:19,542
Just think hard, strain to see.
523
00:28:23,946 --> 00:28:24,913
Like squinting
is good enough.
524
00:28:25,045 --> 00:28:26,547
Come on, just...
525
00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:28,850
All right, you can do this.
526
00:28:39,394 --> 00:28:40,896
Mom.
527
00:28:41,029 --> 00:28:42,231
Just fill the bags,
I guess.
528
00:28:42,363 --> 00:28:43,697
Dad.
529
00:28:43,831 --> 00:28:45,399
I'm giving the clothes away
so we don't have to sort.
530
00:28:45,532 --> 00:28:48,203
I don't want his things
in garbage bags.
531
00:28:48,336 --> 00:28:50,338
Well, what are we going
to do with them?
532
00:28:50,472 --> 00:28:53,041
We don't need to rush
his things out the door.
533
00:28:53,175 --> 00:28:54,176
No, exactly!
534
00:28:54,309 --> 00:28:55,978
Because, I mean,
what's the rush?
535
00:28:56,110 --> 00:28:59,148
Maybe the family wants
some of them or his friends.
536
00:28:59,281 --> 00:29:00,883
Some of these
are good clothes.
537
00:29:01,015 --> 00:29:02,650
Who's gonna want these?
538
00:29:02,783 --> 00:29:05,152
I mean, none of these are
very good clothes, you know.
539
00:29:05,286 --> 00:29:07,087
Okay, some people would kill
for that jacket.
540
00:29:07,222 --> 00:29:08,991
And look at this jacket.
541
00:29:09,123 --> 00:29:11,425
Nobody would be caught dead
in this jacket.
542
00:29:11,559 --> 00:29:14,229
Mom, we're not here
to critique his fashion.
543
00:29:14,361 --> 00:29:16,630
Whatever.
You do the clothes.
544
00:29:16,764 --> 00:29:18,132
I'm gonna get the drawers.
545
00:29:18,266 --> 00:29:20,134
I wish you had buried me
in that jacket.
546
00:29:20,269 --> 00:29:22,037
I love that fucking jacket.
547
00:29:22,169 --> 00:29:24,305
I met a beautiful girl
in that jacket.
548
00:29:24,439 --> 00:29:25,372
Took her home.
549
00:29:25,506 --> 00:29:27,441
Bet you her number's
still in the pocket.
550
00:29:27,574 --> 00:29:28,744
Oh, well.
551
00:29:28,877 --> 00:29:32,414
Some homeless guy is gonna have
the night of his life.
552
00:29:33,349 --> 00:29:35,417
I can't believe
I missed my own funeral.
553
00:29:36,451 --> 00:29:37,485
Look it.
554
00:29:37,619 --> 00:29:38,786
I would have loved
to have seen that.
555
00:29:38,919 --> 00:29:40,888
- It's running.
- Hmm.
556
00:29:41,023 --> 00:29:42,157
An actor's dream.
557
00:29:42,290 --> 00:29:45,661
His watch is running.
It's running.
558
00:29:45,793 --> 00:29:47,094
Yes.
559
00:29:47,228 --> 00:29:49,229
That's all you have to say?
560
00:29:49,363 --> 00:29:51,865
I'm getting the drawers.
561
00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:55,137
No, Barbie.
Don't go in the drawers.
562
00:29:55,270 --> 00:29:57,205
Hey, Dad.
Somebody?
563
00:29:57,339 --> 00:29:58,706
Can't we just call
Bob or Jesse?
564
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:00,876
I'd really rather have a guy
take care of this.
565
00:30:02,077 --> 00:30:03,912
Okay, well, there you go.
566
00:30:04,044 --> 00:30:06,782
- Ugh!
- I warned you.
567
00:30:07,515 --> 00:30:09,984
Come on, we're all
adults here, right?
568
00:30:10,118 --> 00:30:11,753
Like you've never
seen that before.
569
00:30:11,886 --> 00:30:13,354
All right?
570
00:30:13,487 --> 00:30:15,923
20 bucks says there is nothing
in that fridge but beer.
571
00:30:16,057 --> 00:30:17,793
There'll be pickles.
572
00:30:17,926 --> 00:30:19,328
I always bring him pickles.
573
00:30:19,461 --> 00:30:20,895
Yeah, well, you know what?
You both lose.
574
00:30:21,029 --> 00:30:22,230
There's wine in there too,
575
00:30:22,363 --> 00:30:23,864
and pickles and shit
and light beer.
576
00:30:23,998 --> 00:30:26,768
Nothing but beer, 20 bucks?
577
00:30:26,901 --> 00:30:28,869
You're on.
578
00:30:29,003 --> 00:30:29,905
Look.
Look in the back.
579
00:30:30,038 --> 00:30:30,905
Pickles.
Come on.
580
00:30:31,039 --> 00:30:33,275
Look!
Pickles.
581
00:30:33,407 --> 00:30:35,042
- That's right.
- See? Pickles.
582
00:30:35,176 --> 00:30:36,410
That's food.
Doctors say so.
583
00:30:36,543 --> 00:30:38,713
I shouldn't ask you this,
but...
584
00:30:38,847 --> 00:30:41,883
were you disappointed in him,
what he did with his life?
585
00:30:42,015 --> 00:30:43,250
What he didn't do?
586
00:30:43,385 --> 00:30:45,052
What kind of question
is that?
587
00:30:45,186 --> 00:30:47,321
Not a bit.
He was who he was,
588
00:30:47,455 --> 00:30:49,491
and he wasn't gonna be
anybody else.
589
00:30:49,625 --> 00:30:52,961
If you have kids
who are kind and decent,
590
00:30:53,094 --> 00:30:54,628
wishing them a different life
591
00:30:54,763 --> 00:30:58,265
is like hoping an oak tree
will up and grow pine needles.
592
00:30:58,399 --> 00:31:01,436
What does that even mean?
My son wasn't a tree.
593
00:31:01,570 --> 00:31:03,571
I didn't care if he was
successful,
594
00:31:03,705 --> 00:31:05,407
not for its own sake.
595
00:31:05,540 --> 00:31:08,243
I didn't want him to go
into retail, necessarily.
596
00:31:08,376 --> 00:31:09,978
Not even a little bit?
Really?
597
00:31:10,110 --> 00:31:11,345
Really.
598
00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:13,047
I wanted him happy
and true to himself,
599
00:31:13,180 --> 00:31:14,782
and I think he was.
600
00:31:14,917 --> 00:31:16,217
I wanted him to be an actor.
601
00:31:16,350 --> 00:31:17,551
You guys act like I was
some sort
602
00:31:17,685 --> 00:31:19,521
of bus station hooker
or something.
603
00:31:19,654 --> 00:31:21,022
I didn't care if he was rich
or famous
604
00:31:21,156 --> 00:31:22,690
because he didn't care.
605
00:31:22,823 --> 00:31:25,759
It wasn't up to me anyway.
I liked who he was just fine.
606
00:31:25,894 --> 00:31:27,929
Yeah, well, you didn't look
in his sock drawer.
607
00:31:28,062 --> 00:31:28,929
Told you not to look.
608
00:31:29,063 --> 00:31:30,364
I just want him back.
609
00:31:30,497 --> 00:31:34,535
I would just like him to get
a chance to be happy,
610
00:31:34,668 --> 00:31:37,205
to find whatever it was
he was looking for.
611
00:31:37,339 --> 00:31:40,008
I'm still looking, Ma.
They won't let me stop.
612
00:31:40,140 --> 00:31:41,877
He was a wonderful actor.
613
00:31:42,010 --> 00:31:43,545
Oh, it wasn't fair to go
like that.
614
00:31:43,677 --> 00:31:44,946
It wasn't fair.
615
00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:47,849
I just wish he had a chance
to do that one-man show thing.
616
00:31:47,982 --> 00:31:50,285
I would have liked to see what
he made with that, you know?
617
00:31:50,418 --> 00:31:53,155
Two years seems like
such a waste now.
618
00:31:53,288 --> 00:31:57,259
I hated that man who gave
the speech at the ceremony.
619
00:31:57,391 --> 00:31:58,926
He hardly knew him.
620
00:31:59,061 --> 00:32:00,995
He pronounced
everybody's names wrong.
621
00:32:01,128 --> 00:32:03,031
And he's telling us
exactly what he's like.
622
00:32:03,165 --> 00:32:04,532
It was ridiculous.
623
00:32:04,666 --> 00:32:06,835
Help me with the boxes.
Gonna be dark soon.
624
00:32:06,967 --> 00:32:08,836
Your mother doesn't drive well
at night anymore.
625
00:32:08,969 --> 00:32:10,271
I have work in the morning.
626
00:32:10,405 --> 00:32:12,574
And this doesn't get
any easier if we wait.
627
00:32:14,275 --> 00:32:15,609
You guys are depressing me,
and it was my funeral.
628
00:32:15,744 --> 00:32:17,413
I think we should say
goodbye here.
629
00:32:17,545 --> 00:32:18,645
Goodbye?
630
00:32:18,780 --> 00:32:21,282
I mean, this is where
he spent his time.
631
00:32:21,416 --> 00:32:23,752
I feel like he was here.
632
00:32:23,886 --> 00:32:27,089
I feel as if we can feel him.
633
00:32:29,123 --> 00:32:32,060
Not in some ceremony.
634
00:32:33,594 --> 00:32:34,995
Goodbye, Dad.
635
00:32:35,129 --> 00:32:37,764
I'm not saying goodbye
to anybody yet.
636
00:32:37,898 --> 00:32:40,400
I'm still not convinced.
637
00:32:40,534 --> 00:32:42,137
Well, I can understand that.
638
00:32:42,271 --> 00:32:43,504
I don't know what
they put in the casket,
639
00:32:43,638 --> 00:32:45,040
but it must have looked
like gazpacho.
640
00:32:45,173 --> 00:32:48,042
I am not accepting this
until I decide to.
641
00:32:48,176 --> 00:32:49,410
Why should I?
642
00:32:49,544 --> 00:32:53,114
I mean, it doesn't feel to me
like he's gone.
643
00:32:54,715 --> 00:32:57,118
To me, it feels like
he's right here,
644
00:32:57,252 --> 00:32:59,922
like he's right here
in this room with us,
645
00:33:00,054 --> 00:33:05,058
and he's arguing about all
these stupid little details.
646
00:33:05,193 --> 00:33:09,064
He's here.
He's here!
647
00:33:09,196 --> 00:33:12,600
He's here until I say he's not.
648
00:33:14,101 --> 00:33:16,304
Thanks, Mom.
649
00:33:17,105 --> 00:33:19,374
Goodbye to you, too.
650
00:33:43,031 --> 00:33:45,300
I already bought
his Hanukkah presents.
651
00:33:45,433 --> 00:33:47,369
Ugh, no more drunken
Hannukah caroling
652
00:33:47,502 --> 00:33:49,937
yelling out car window
at the Orthodox Jews
653
00:33:50,071 --> 00:33:51,705
- in Williamsburg.
- In April.
654
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:54,109
You guys can totally do that
without me, come on.
655
00:33:54,242 --> 00:33:56,211
I miss
every stupid annoying thing
656
00:33:56,343 --> 00:33:58,779
about his stupid annoying self.
657
00:33:58,913 --> 00:34:00,349
Thanks, I guess?
658
00:34:00,482 --> 00:34:03,618
He's not those boxes,
and he's not in that junk.
659
00:34:03,752 --> 00:34:05,887
And he wasn't in
that drawer either.
660
00:34:06,020 --> 00:34:07,788
It's probably some of me
in that strainer
661
00:34:07,922 --> 00:34:10,292
that they used
to fish me out of the car with.
662
00:34:10,424 --> 00:34:13,093
Just have to keep him
in mind and our memory.
663
00:34:13,228 --> 00:34:16,598
No, that's not good enough.
664
00:34:30,411 --> 00:34:32,481
Hey, buckle up.
665
00:34:37,252 --> 00:34:39,152
Bye.
666
00:34:49,730 --> 00:34:52,734
Okay, think of the bright side.
667
00:34:52,868 --> 00:34:55,636
What is the bright side?
668
00:34:55,770 --> 00:34:57,971
I don't know.
669
00:34:58,105 --> 00:35:01,508
I feel great physically.
670
00:35:01,643 --> 00:35:04,378
My cholesterol
is finally down to zero.
671
00:35:05,846 --> 00:35:09,517
Parking is no longer a problem.
672
00:35:11,418 --> 00:35:14,321
Nothing ever itches,
673
00:35:14,456 --> 00:35:16,925
but I've got
plenty of free time.
674
00:35:18,192 --> 00:35:20,996
I can go see my friends now.
675
00:35:22,996 --> 00:35:25,199
All right.
676
00:35:28,168 --> 00:35:30,004
Angelo!
677
00:35:31,706 --> 00:35:33,308
Angelo!
678
00:35:52,058 --> 00:35:55,830
Hey, Angelo?
679
00:35:55,964 --> 00:35:58,833
Angelo!
You here?
680
00:36:01,969 --> 00:36:03,371
Shit.
681
00:36:03,505 --> 00:36:06,273
Michael!
682
00:36:06,407 --> 00:36:09,243
Michael motherfucking Logan,
seriously?
683
00:36:09,377 --> 00:36:10,844
- Angelo?
- Mikey!
684
00:36:10,978 --> 00:36:13,148
Come here, bro!
685
00:36:13,281 --> 00:36:16,551
- It's me, big as death.
- Ah!
686
00:36:16,685 --> 00:36:17,886
- You're dead!
- Yeah.
687
00:36:18,018 --> 00:36:19,787
You look great.
This is fantastic.
688
00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:23,190
I'm so glad you're dead!
Never get to say that.
689
00:36:23,324 --> 00:36:24,558
I've never been
so happy to find
690
00:36:24,692 --> 00:36:27,194
that a friend of mine died.
691
00:36:27,328 --> 00:36:28,730
When the hell did you die?
692
00:36:28,862 --> 00:36:30,130
Just recently.
693
00:36:30,264 --> 00:36:32,634
I was trying to think of who I
knew that died single like me.
694
00:36:32,766 --> 00:36:35,969
Born to be a happy bachelor,
and died that way too.
695
00:36:36,103 --> 00:36:37,772
Not the way I thought
that was gonna work out,
696
00:36:37,904 --> 00:36:41,808
but hey, you live and learn.
Come on in, bro!
697
00:36:42,677 --> 00:36:45,113
Isn't this shit crazy,
this whole crazy system?
698
00:36:45,246 --> 00:36:46,548
I mean, can you believe it?
699
00:36:46,681 --> 00:36:48,417
I know, it's like playing
fucking musical chairs
700
00:36:48,549 --> 00:36:50,685
- to the death.
- Hey, you're telling me.
701
00:36:50,819 --> 00:36:53,554
And bro, have you tried
jerking off yet?
702
00:36:53,688 --> 00:36:54,923
It's like trying to drive
in neutral.
703
00:36:55,056 --> 00:36:56,324
Nothing, ghost dick.
704
00:36:56,458 --> 00:36:58,693
So, why'd they even let us
keep our dicks?
705
00:36:58,826 --> 00:37:00,128
- I know.
- No pissing either.
706
00:37:00,261 --> 00:37:02,295
I know, it's like they just
fucking mocking us.
707
00:37:02,429 --> 00:37:03,732
- With all of it.
- You said it.
708
00:37:03,864 --> 00:37:05,567
How much of a pisser was it
and when you found out
709
00:37:05,699 --> 00:37:07,435
that there's no kind of suicide
either, huh?
710
00:37:07,569 --> 00:37:08,869
Just got to stay
and wait it out.
711
00:37:09,002 --> 00:37:11,005
I mean, come on.
Tell me it's not just me.
712
00:37:11,139 --> 00:37:12,474
Oh, man.
713
00:37:12,607 --> 00:37:15,777
You just ruined
my next, like, 20 questions.
714
00:37:18,378 --> 00:37:19,913
So, what you doing here?
715
00:37:20,047 --> 00:37:22,417
I mean,
if you don't mind my asking.
716
00:37:22,551 --> 00:37:24,652
You know, I'm happy to see you.
Don't get me wrong.
717
00:37:24,786 --> 00:37:26,554
I just didn't know
where else to go, you know?
718
00:37:26,688 --> 00:37:28,322
I needed to talk to someone.
719
00:37:28,456 --> 00:37:31,625
You know, a guy
I could relate to.
720
00:37:31,759 --> 00:37:33,527
You know I'm not gay, right?
721
00:37:33,661 --> 00:37:35,163
I cannot move on with you
or in with you
722
00:37:35,295 --> 00:37:36,529
or in you, okay?
723
00:37:36,663 --> 00:37:37,965
- No can do, bro.
- Yeah, yeah, I know.
724
00:37:38,100 --> 00:37:39,833
I just needed
to talk to someone
725
00:37:39,967 --> 00:37:41,902
who might be able to tell me
what the fuck is going on.
726
00:37:42,036 --> 00:37:44,304
Yeah, well, hey.
727
00:37:44,438 --> 00:37:46,875
I'm being a crappy host here.
728
00:37:47,007 --> 00:37:51,346
I mean, you want something,
I don't know, to sit on, read?
729
00:37:51,478 --> 00:37:52,614
No, no.
730
00:37:52,748 --> 00:37:53,815
Want to check out
my beer collection?
731
00:37:53,949 --> 00:37:55,081
I have a lot.
732
00:37:55,215 --> 00:37:57,518
I really have everything.
You want a drink?
733
00:37:57,652 --> 00:38:01,755
No, no, no, I'm fine.
I had plenty.
734
00:38:01,889 --> 00:38:05,560
So, how is it?
You know?
735
00:38:05,692 --> 00:38:07,261
The boredom...
it's got to be maddening.
736
00:38:07,395 --> 00:38:11,666
Oh, man, it's not so bad.
I get a lot of reading done.
737
00:38:11,799 --> 00:38:14,703
You ever read Vonnegut?
Fucking phenomenal.
738
00:38:17,438 --> 00:38:19,706
God, yeah.
It's so fucking boring.
739
00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:21,375
- Yeah.
- You're right.
740
00:38:21,509 --> 00:38:22,677
I just heard myself
say that shit.
741
00:38:22,810 --> 00:38:25,045
I am so fucking bored.
742
00:38:25,179 --> 00:38:27,915
I woke up here and, like,
right off the bat, I'm like,
743
00:38:28,049 --> 00:38:29,684
"So when do I get
to meet Hendrix?"
744
00:38:29,817 --> 00:38:32,753
And, you know, Abe Lincoln?
And, you know, Farrah?
745
00:38:32,888 --> 00:38:35,322
I swear, first words
once I got here.
746
00:38:35,456 --> 00:38:36,891
My guide laughed his ass off.
747
00:38:37,025 --> 00:38:39,661
So why aren't you out there,
748
00:38:39,793 --> 00:38:41,263
you know,
trying to find someone?
749
00:38:41,395 --> 00:38:42,263
I mean, you know
the deal, right?
750
00:38:42,395 --> 00:38:43,264
It's harsh, no?
751
00:38:43,397 --> 00:38:44,698
Oh, man.
752
00:38:44,833 --> 00:38:46,835
First couple days,
I worked it like a dog,
753
00:38:46,967 --> 00:38:49,571
like a college freshman.
You know?
754
00:38:49,703 --> 00:38:52,005
I combed my goddamn hair,
I stood up straight,
755
00:38:52,139 --> 00:38:55,343
made sure I belched silently,
the whole deal.
756
00:38:55,476 --> 00:38:56,844
I tried, man.
757
00:38:56,978 --> 00:38:58,746
But these girls,
they've heard everything,
758
00:38:58,880 --> 00:39:00,748
and they couldn't settle
if they wanted to.
759
00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,650
Great, that's not
what I wanted to hear.
760
00:39:02,784 --> 00:39:05,820
You can't move forward
unless it's the real thing.
761
00:39:05,953 --> 00:39:07,455
You both got to feel true love.
762
00:39:07,589 --> 00:39:09,623
Got to be magic,
or nothing happens, pffft!
763
00:39:09,757 --> 00:39:11,759
You know, that's a high bar
to jump over.
764
00:39:11,893 --> 00:39:14,830
You look around, and you can
just feel the universe
765
00:39:14,962 --> 00:39:17,564
ignoring you.
You know, whispering like,
766
00:39:17,699 --> 00:39:19,701
"Nope, that ain't it,
try again."
767
00:39:19,833 --> 00:39:23,303
So, then you tighten up
your game, you sharpen up,
768
00:39:23,436 --> 00:39:26,674
and then you fail again.
And it gets worse each time
769
00:39:26,808 --> 00:39:28,342
because now
you can't kid yourself
770
00:39:28,476 --> 00:39:31,378
that you're not really trying
or you don't really care.
771
00:39:31,513 --> 00:39:33,648
So, we're screwed?
772
00:39:33,781 --> 00:39:35,582
This ain't hell,
773
00:39:35,717 --> 00:39:38,153
but it's sure doing
its best impression.
774
00:39:39,453 --> 00:39:42,456
So what do you do?
775
00:39:42,589 --> 00:39:44,858
Me?
776
00:39:44,991 --> 00:39:46,794
I watch living people
when they're naked.
777
00:39:46,927 --> 00:39:51,197
I watch them fuck, watch them
shower, watch them jerk off.
778
00:39:51,331 --> 00:39:53,467
It's hilarious, man.
It's the funniest thing ever.
779
00:39:53,601 --> 00:39:55,369
Yeah, funny.
780
00:39:55,502 --> 00:39:58,372
Isn't that like watching the
Food Channel on a liquid diet?
781
00:39:58,505 --> 00:39:59,839
It's not so bad.
782
00:39:59,973 --> 00:40:02,676
What, are you spending
your days as a peeping Tom?
783
00:40:02,810 --> 00:40:05,846
No, man.
A peeping Tom's gotta hide.
784
00:40:05,980 --> 00:40:08,949
I'm right there with
a fucking Glenlivet in my hand.
785
00:40:09,083 --> 00:40:10,551
You know,
just hanging out, casual,
786
00:40:10,685 --> 00:40:11,819
no worries in the world.
787
00:40:11,951 --> 00:40:13,186
What else do you do?
I mean,
788
00:40:13,321 --> 00:40:14,721
even that's
gotta get old eventually.
789
00:40:14,855 --> 00:40:17,124
Not really.
You'd be surprised.
790
00:40:17,257 --> 00:40:20,060
Death relieves an amazing
amount of guilt, too.
791
00:40:20,194 --> 00:40:21,495
And no jealousy, either.
792
00:40:21,630 --> 00:40:24,398
I'm very proud of myself most
of the time, I've gotta say.
793
00:40:24,531 --> 00:40:25,899
You must be.
794
00:40:26,034 --> 00:40:28,569
Man, it's got to be crazy,
right?
795
00:40:28,703 --> 00:40:30,772
I mean, you can't do anything.
796
00:40:30,904 --> 00:40:34,040
Well, I walk a lot.
797
00:40:34,174 --> 00:40:37,144
I drink a lot.
Plus I read a lot.
798
00:40:37,277 --> 00:40:39,045
You sure you don't want
something to read?
799
00:40:39,179 --> 00:40:41,348
Nah, I don't even know
where I'd start.
800
00:40:41,482 --> 00:40:43,216
You got a self-help section?
801
00:40:43,351 --> 00:40:45,319
Not unless smut counts.
802
00:40:45,453 --> 00:40:48,056
Nah, that self-improvement
crap's a dead end,
803
00:40:48,188 --> 00:40:49,156
no pun intended.
804
00:40:49,290 --> 00:40:50,958
It's the great authors
you need,
805
00:40:51,092 --> 00:40:55,029
literature like "Moby Dick,"
or, you know, Updike.
806
00:40:55,163 --> 00:40:57,398
- Yeah, why?
- Why? I don't know.
807
00:40:57,531 --> 00:41:00,901
You want to spend eternity
with Deepak Chopra?
808
00:41:01,034 --> 00:41:02,636
Once only important stuff
is important,
809
00:41:02,770 --> 00:41:05,674
you really can't read
joke books anymore.
810
00:41:07,540 --> 00:41:10,077
All right, so...
811
00:41:11,045 --> 00:41:13,615
Where do I go if I want to try
my luck, you know?
812
00:41:13,748 --> 00:41:14,949
Find a girl, you know?
813
00:41:15,083 --> 00:41:16,517
I can't
just give up without trying.
814
00:41:16,650 --> 00:41:17,985
Of course, of course.
815
00:41:18,118 --> 00:41:19,887
I like your motivation.
You know, we're men.
816
00:41:20,020 --> 00:41:22,223
We're not happy unless we try
to defeat something, right?
817
00:41:22,355 --> 00:41:24,257
Yeah, or at least tell
ourselves that we tried.
818
00:41:24,391 --> 00:41:25,960
So?
819
00:41:27,161 --> 00:41:32,032
Well, there's one place,
but it's not easy.
820
00:41:32,165 --> 00:41:34,968
It's hell on your self-esteem
and your nerves.
821
00:41:35,103 --> 00:41:37,172
Think you felt out of place
as the old guy in the clubs
822
00:41:37,304 --> 00:41:41,308
when you were alive?
This will kill you.
823
00:41:43,810 --> 00:41:45,112
What's that?
824
00:41:45,246 --> 00:41:46,647
Just a quarter.
825
00:41:46,781 --> 00:41:49,183
Yeah, I know what it is, but
where the fuck did you get it?
826
00:41:49,317 --> 00:41:51,552
I don't know,
I brought it with me.
827
00:41:51,685 --> 00:41:55,055
From your life?
That's fucking wild.
828
00:41:55,188 --> 00:41:57,491
I've never been able to carry
anything around with me
829
00:41:57,625 --> 00:41:59,293
but booze and books.
830
00:41:59,426 --> 00:42:01,696
Everything else just falls
right through my hands.
831
00:42:01,828 --> 00:42:03,830
Yeah, well, I died with it
in my hand.
832
00:42:03,964 --> 00:42:05,265
I guess I carry it around
833
00:42:05,398 --> 00:42:08,601
for, like, a bad luck charm
or something.
834
00:42:08,735 --> 00:42:09,804
All right, so you want to go?
835
00:42:09,936 --> 00:42:12,639
- Go?
- Yeah.
836
00:42:12,772 --> 00:42:14,708
Yeah, sure.
837
00:42:14,842 --> 00:42:16,644
You're not gonna like it.
838
00:42:16,777 --> 00:42:19,746
Well, I didn't eat meat...
839
00:42:19,880 --> 00:42:24,217
or gluten, or sugar or yeast.
840
00:42:24,351 --> 00:42:25,886
Let me see,
I never wore nail polish
841
00:42:26,020 --> 00:42:28,121
because it made me feel
claustrophobic.
842
00:42:28,255 --> 00:42:30,891
I think they love each other,
but they're like, "meow."
843
00:42:32,592 --> 00:42:33,726
You say you died alone?
844
00:42:33,860 --> 00:42:35,429
Uh, with my cats.
845
00:42:35,563 --> 00:42:38,767
But I'm not really sure
what that has to do with Jesus.
846
00:42:41,368 --> 00:42:43,904
I hate any movies
that are, like, set in space
847
00:42:44,038 --> 00:42:46,407
or foreign countries.
848
00:42:49,043 --> 00:42:52,180
Well, you know,
mostly I dedicated my life...
849
00:42:52,313 --> 00:42:55,784
it's kind of embarrassing...
to the art of ventriloquism.
850
00:42:55,917 --> 00:42:58,719
But, of course,
I couldn't pass over with him.
851
00:42:58,853 --> 00:43:01,856
But can you kind of imagine it?
852
00:43:01,989 --> 00:43:04,424
"You think this date's
going bad?
853
00:43:04,558 --> 00:43:06,828
Wait till I take you home."
854
00:43:06,960 --> 00:43:09,129
Wouldn't be the first hand
I've made love to.
855
00:43:09,263 --> 00:43:10,797
I can guess anyone's sign
856
00:43:10,931 --> 00:43:12,465
within the first 30 seconds
of meeting them
857
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:17,672
without ever speaking to them.
You want to know how I know?
858
00:43:17,806 --> 00:43:18,839
No.
859
00:43:25,746 --> 00:43:27,281
How about those Knicks?
860
00:43:27,415 --> 00:43:31,250
I don't like animals.
I prefer silence to music.
861
00:43:31,384 --> 00:43:33,587
I have issues
with being touched,
862
00:43:33,721 --> 00:43:36,891
so sex has pretty much always
been out of the question,
863
00:43:37,025 --> 00:43:38,526
and no sex talk either.
864
00:43:38,659 --> 00:43:41,561
- So what do you like to do?
- My God, like, anything.
865
00:43:41,696 --> 00:43:44,766
I'm easy, whatever.
866
00:43:53,840 --> 00:43:55,808
Man, I forgot
how brutal this is.
867
00:43:55,942 --> 00:43:58,412
I told you.
868
00:43:59,246 --> 00:44:01,081
You see that girl over there?
869
00:44:01,215 --> 00:44:03,551
My God, I just
want to rip my dick off
870
00:44:03,683 --> 00:44:06,153
and throw it at her.
You know?
871
00:44:07,121 --> 00:44:08,689
Is that a rude thing to do?
872
00:44:08,822 --> 00:44:11,792
I don't even remember
the rules.
873
00:44:11,926 --> 00:44:13,360
Why don't you go over there
and talk to her?
874
00:44:13,493 --> 00:44:15,962
Nah, you kidding me?
875
00:44:16,096 --> 00:44:19,532
I've been shot down
more times than skeet.
876
00:44:19,667 --> 00:44:21,235
I just don't care anymore.
877
00:44:21,368 --> 00:44:24,605
I'd rather watch you beat
your head against a brick wall.
878
00:44:24,739 --> 00:44:26,541
Come on,
get back out there, boy.
879
00:44:26,674 --> 00:44:28,742
No, no, no.
880
00:44:28,875 --> 00:44:31,812
What about her over there?
881
00:44:32,714 --> 00:44:35,248
Come on, get out there.
882
00:44:35,382 --> 00:44:37,851
All right.
883
00:44:45,826 --> 00:44:47,528
Gong.
You can go.
884
00:44:47,661 --> 00:44:48,696
Without even talking to me?
885
00:44:48,828 --> 00:44:50,330
How did you decide
that so quickly?
886
00:44:50,464 --> 00:44:52,432
You want me to tell you
what I don't like about you?
887
00:44:52,565 --> 00:44:54,201
No, gong.
888
00:44:54,335 --> 00:44:56,203
Is that supposed to be, like,
"The Gong Show" or something?
889
00:44:56,337 --> 00:44:59,139
I mean, that is
some charming shit.
890
00:44:59,272 --> 00:45:00,907
I guess you don't
remember me.
891
00:45:01,042 --> 00:45:05,078
We met when we were alive and
you're a woman-hating douche.
892
00:45:05,212 --> 00:45:08,147
Why should us both dying
suddenly making you my type?
893
00:45:08,281 --> 00:45:10,583
We're done here, right?
I don't have time for you.
894
00:45:10,717 --> 00:45:14,154
Come on, time?
We got nothing but time.
895
00:45:14,288 --> 00:45:17,958
Really?
You didn't figure it out yet?
896
00:45:18,092 --> 00:45:21,494
Think about it.
If our time here was unlimited,
897
00:45:21,628 --> 00:45:24,264
this place would be crawling
with the unlovable losers
898
00:45:24,398 --> 00:45:25,565
from all time.
899
00:45:25,699 --> 00:45:29,302
You see any homely
one-legged Civil War vets
900
00:45:29,436 --> 00:45:32,139
wooing maidens?
This place so crowded?
901
00:45:32,272 --> 00:45:34,241
Time.
No, my friend.
902
00:45:34,375 --> 00:45:36,377
The post-biological clock
is ticking.
903
00:45:36,511 --> 00:45:38,411
Wake up and listen.
904
00:45:38,545 --> 00:45:40,414
Wait, ticking?
905
00:45:40,547 --> 00:45:41,881
Yeah.
906
00:45:42,016 --> 00:45:45,519
So loud, you can hear it where
your heartbeat used to be.
907
00:45:45,652 --> 00:45:47,154
How much time do we have?
908
00:45:47,288 --> 00:45:48,856
It's like life.
Nobody knows,
909
00:45:48,989 --> 00:45:51,892
and everybody gets
a different amount.
910
00:45:52,025 --> 00:45:53,860
What happens
if we strike out?
911
00:45:53,994 --> 00:45:55,897
I'll just say at least
you won't know
912
00:45:56,029 --> 00:45:59,100
once it's happened to you.
Or care.
913
00:46:02,569 --> 00:46:04,371
Hey!
914
00:46:04,505 --> 00:46:06,273
Scarlett!
915
00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:09,877
Let me in!
916
00:46:10,877 --> 00:46:12,278
Scarlett, where are you?
917
00:46:12,413 --> 00:46:14,982
I need to talk to you.
You lied to me!
918
00:46:15,114 --> 00:46:16,949
I know you can hear me.
Where are you?
919
00:46:17,083 --> 00:46:18,484
Are you listening to me?
920
00:46:19,753 --> 00:46:21,889
Where are you, Scarlett?
921
00:46:23,456 --> 00:46:26,060
Mommy, what's wrong
with Roger?
922
00:46:26,194 --> 00:46:27,494
You hear me?
923
00:46:27,627 --> 00:46:30,964
Come on, bark!
I can bug this dog all day!
924
00:46:31,098 --> 00:46:33,601
Come out here, Scarlett!
I've got to talk to you!
925
00:46:33,735 --> 00:46:35,936
Aaah!
Arf, arf!
926
00:46:36,069 --> 00:46:37,236
It doesn't work
like this, Michael.
927
00:46:37,371 --> 00:46:39,139
You're not supposed
to summon me.
928
00:46:39,272 --> 00:46:41,174
Yeah, well, I'm not gonna
wait for you to just roll up
929
00:46:41,308 --> 00:46:43,543
whenever you're ready.
I need to talk to you.
930
00:46:43,677 --> 00:46:46,213
You have all
the information you need.
931
00:46:46,346 --> 00:46:48,882
Yeah, I do now,
but you lied to me.
932
00:46:50,451 --> 00:46:53,186
Oh, shit!
That was awesome.
933
00:46:53,319 --> 00:46:54,520
You must have owned a car
in your life.
934
00:46:54,654 --> 00:46:55,889
It was her time.
935
00:46:56,023 --> 00:46:57,292
I never said you had
all the time in the world.
936
00:46:57,424 --> 00:46:59,926
No, a lie of omission
is still a lie.
937
00:47:02,462 --> 00:47:03,897
Excuse me, you didn't even
938
00:47:04,031 --> 00:47:05,998
see fit to tell me
that there's a deadline?
939
00:47:06,132 --> 00:47:07,368
You'd have done things
differently?
940
00:47:07,502 --> 00:47:09,170
Uh, yeah, I would have done
941
00:47:09,302 --> 00:47:11,906
just about everything
differently, and you know it.
942
00:47:12,038 --> 00:47:13,440
That's why I didn't tell you.
943
00:47:13,574 --> 00:47:17,545
It's easier if you focus
on the search and nothing more.
944
00:47:17,677 --> 00:47:18,980
That's how it works.
945
00:47:19,112 --> 00:47:21,348
So I suggest you get on
with it as best you can.
946
00:47:21,482 --> 00:47:24,250
Okay, okay,
so what exactly happens
947
00:47:24,384 --> 00:47:27,422
if I don't find a soul mate?
What, do I burn in hell?
948
00:47:27,554 --> 00:47:29,656
Don't be childish.
949
00:47:29,790 --> 00:47:31,625
I'll be with you in a moment.
950
00:47:32,893 --> 00:47:34,561
Then what?
951
00:47:34,694 --> 00:47:36,963
Nothing, nothing at all.
952
00:47:37,098 --> 00:47:39,366
Nothing?
Then what's the point?
953
00:47:39,500 --> 00:47:41,201
What's the point of anything?
954
00:47:41,335 --> 00:47:44,505
Nothing happens.
You cease to exist,
955
00:47:44,638 --> 00:47:47,674
and the world goes on
without you as always.
956
00:47:47,808 --> 00:47:49,543
I mean, how do I know
someone's my soul mate
957
00:47:49,676 --> 00:47:53,681
if I've never been to Venezuela
or Singapore or Queens?
958
00:47:53,815 --> 00:47:57,284
Once I write the ticket,
I'm not allowed to void it.
959
00:47:57,418 --> 00:48:00,621
You can fight it
with the info on the back.
960
00:48:00,753 --> 00:48:04,491
Once I write the ticket,
I'm not allowed to void it.
961
00:48:05,726 --> 00:48:07,061
You can write it...
962
00:48:07,194 --> 00:48:09,163
You meet a girl,
fall in love.
963
00:48:09,297 --> 00:48:11,532
It's that simple.
964
00:48:11,665 --> 00:48:13,734
How am I supposed
to meet a girl?
965
00:48:13,868 --> 00:48:15,402
Life is like that, isn't it?
966
00:48:15,536 --> 00:48:18,772
Full of complications,
no explanations.
967
00:48:18,906 --> 00:48:21,275
Death is too, only more so.
968
00:48:21,409 --> 00:48:24,345
Life is easier,
but you couldn't make it work,
969
00:48:24,478 --> 00:48:27,047
so you have a second chance.
970
00:48:27,181 --> 00:48:30,284
One last second chance,
971
00:48:30,417 --> 00:48:31,585
and you're complaining
about it?
972
00:48:31,719 --> 00:48:33,921
Well, it's meaningless
and arbitrary.
973
00:48:34,054 --> 00:48:37,558
No.
It makes allowances for magic.
974
00:48:37,692 --> 00:48:40,226
Magic?
Are you fucking shitting me?
975
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:42,362
The point is to meet someone
976
00:48:42,496 --> 00:48:45,433
who sparks something
within you.
977
00:48:45,565 --> 00:48:47,067
Two become one.
978
00:48:47,201 --> 00:48:50,003
Only paired souls progress.
979
00:48:50,138 --> 00:48:54,308
Love allows you to spend
forever with someone.
980
00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:55,810
That is what love is.
981
00:48:55,942 --> 00:48:58,978
Okay, so then what happens
to the single losers?
982
00:48:59,112 --> 00:49:01,315
They spend eternity
not existing.
983
00:49:01,449 --> 00:49:03,717
You both have to fall in love,
or nothing.
984
00:49:03,851 --> 00:49:05,920
It's hardly fair.
985
00:49:06,052 --> 00:49:07,288
Little secret.
986
00:49:07,422 --> 00:49:09,857
The universe is not fair.
It's just big.
987
00:49:09,991 --> 00:49:13,159
Okay, I don't get how
the universe supposedly knows
988
00:49:13,293 --> 00:49:14,595
and decides the difference.
989
00:49:14,728 --> 00:49:18,132
The universe
doesn't decide anything.
990
00:49:18,264 --> 00:49:23,469
Love just is, and its existence
causes a reaction.
991
00:49:23,603 --> 00:49:28,040
It's like life or pregnancy.
It is or it isn't.
992
00:49:28,174 --> 00:49:30,110
No one decides anything.
993
00:49:31,212 --> 00:49:32,513
Am I getting on your nerves?
994
00:49:32,645 --> 00:49:34,113
Well, you do ask
a lot of questions.
995
00:49:34,248 --> 00:49:36,083
I have a lot of questions.
996
00:49:36,217 --> 00:49:38,051
Who did you ask
before you met me?
997
00:49:46,759 --> 00:49:49,763
Is there any way he can
see me for just five minutes?
998
00:49:49,897 --> 00:49:52,333
It's not that simple.
999
00:49:56,036 --> 00:49:57,938
Right.
That's what I'm saying.
1000
00:49:58,071 --> 00:49:59,505
Can you hear me?
1001
00:49:59,639 --> 00:50:01,908
I know, but I'm telling you,
I can get you any of it.
1002
00:50:02,043 --> 00:50:03,210
Right, right.
1003
00:50:03,344 --> 00:50:04,511
I'm sitting on a ton of stuff:
1004
00:50:04,645 --> 00:50:06,848
tapes, monologues,
whatever you can sell.
1005
00:50:07,647 --> 00:50:08,648
Yeah, sure.
1006
00:50:08,781 --> 00:50:10,283
Well, this all goes cold
when the body does,
1007
00:50:10,418 --> 00:50:12,820
so I'm looking at all offers.
1008
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:15,188
'Course the one-man show
is closed.
1009
00:50:15,322 --> 00:50:18,025
He's in the ground.
It's a one-man show.
1010
00:50:18,157 --> 00:50:19,625
Yeah.
He wrote it, he directed it.
1011
00:50:19,759 --> 00:50:21,928
I'm the one
sitting on the pile of gold.
1012
00:50:22,563 --> 00:50:24,765
No, I'm not saying
he was famous.
1013
00:50:24,897 --> 00:50:26,866
He wasn't James Dean,
but neither was James Dean
1014
00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:29,069
until he got in the Porsche.
1015
00:50:29,203 --> 00:50:30,838
All right, who have you
got in mind?
1016
00:50:30,971 --> 00:50:33,473
What would that take,
between you and me?
1017
00:50:33,607 --> 00:50:35,909
No, no, I agree.
He's a terrific actor.
1018
00:50:36,043 --> 00:50:37,545
He would be perfect
if he's interested.
1019
00:50:37,677 --> 00:50:39,746
You recast my show
before I'm even cold?
1020
00:50:39,880 --> 00:50:41,915
You're not serious.
1021
00:50:42,715 --> 00:50:44,518
I so wish I could piss
in that right now.
1022
00:50:44,650 --> 00:50:47,253
Yeah, we wait two weeks
just for appearances,
1023
00:50:47,386 --> 00:50:48,522
then we announce.
1024
00:50:48,656 --> 00:50:50,424
Four weeks
if you feel feelings.
1025
00:50:50,556 --> 00:50:52,959
Yeah, get the wheels in motion,
or somebody else will.
1026
00:50:53,094 --> 00:50:54,895
Yeah, all right.
Bye.
1027
00:50:55,029 --> 00:50:57,297
Get me Amy on the phone, Pam.
1028
00:50:57,431 --> 00:51:00,168
What the hell?
You've got to be kidding me!
1029
00:51:01,967 --> 00:51:04,205
Amy, hey.
1030
00:51:10,344 --> 00:51:12,713
Nice. I knew
I'd find you here.
1031
00:51:12,846 --> 00:51:15,516
If you're waiting for me
to act all embarrassed,
1032
00:51:15,650 --> 00:51:17,351
you might want
to pull up a comfy chair.
1033
00:51:17,484 --> 00:51:18,518
It's gonna be a while.
1034
00:51:18,652 --> 00:51:21,521
My sense of shame died
when I did.
1035
00:51:21,654 --> 00:51:23,422
So tell me about the rules.
1036
00:51:23,556 --> 00:51:25,091
You've got to be kidding me.
1037
00:51:25,225 --> 00:51:26,694
How's this for a rule?
1038
00:51:26,826 --> 00:51:29,061
If there really is eternal life
and you can't just sit here
1039
00:51:29,196 --> 00:51:30,563
and enjoy your invisibility,
1040
00:51:30,697 --> 00:51:32,499
then you're not gonna want
to be part of it anyway.
1041
00:51:32,632 --> 00:51:35,101
No, no, I'm talking about
the rules about what we can
1042
00:51:35,235 --> 00:51:37,271
and cannot do
and how long we have
1043
00:51:37,404 --> 00:51:39,072
and what we got to do
to make it all work
1044
00:51:39,206 --> 00:51:40,307
to... you know, to go on.
1045
00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:42,076
Bro, are you seeing all this?
1046
00:51:42,210 --> 00:51:44,545
Angelo, I don't have
time to...
1047
00:51:44,677 --> 00:51:46,147
Jesus.
1048
00:51:46,279 --> 00:51:48,482
He's not here right now.
1049
00:51:48,614 --> 00:51:52,218
Oh, yeah, Jesus.
1050
00:51:52,353 --> 00:51:53,686
I am not afraid of you.
1051
00:51:53,819 --> 00:51:56,489
Oh my God, I cannot stop
staring at that ass.
1052
00:51:56,623 --> 00:51:59,493
It's like a magnetic force.
1053
00:51:59,625 --> 00:52:01,728
Black hole
just sucking in all the light.
1054
00:52:01,862 --> 00:52:03,530
Yeah, there's a black hole
all right.
1055
00:52:03,663 --> 00:52:06,600
I bet you can hear the ocean
in that thing.
1056
00:52:06,734 --> 00:52:08,802
Okay, that's a little gross.
1057
00:52:08,935 --> 00:52:10,302
Okay, I'm starting
to get a feel
1058
00:52:10,436 --> 00:52:13,406
of why you're still here,
Angelo.
1059
00:52:13,540 --> 00:52:14,641
I'll tell you the only thing
1060
00:52:14,775 --> 00:52:17,478
I've learned here
so far if you want.
1061
00:52:17,610 --> 00:52:21,047
All right, yeah.
Yeah, I'll take that, shoot.
1062
00:52:21,181 --> 00:52:22,983
It's bigger than it sounds.
1063
00:52:23,116 --> 00:52:25,484
Yeah, that's what she said.
1064
00:52:25,618 --> 00:52:26,619
No, come on, shoot.
1065
00:52:26,752 --> 00:52:29,455
We're actors, Michael,
artists.
1066
00:52:29,589 --> 00:52:31,725
I mean, the world
may remember us or miss us
1067
00:52:31,857 --> 00:52:33,526
and may be glad
that we were here,
1068
00:52:33,659 --> 00:52:36,730
but it isn't gonna ever
really need us for anything.
1069
00:52:36,864 --> 00:52:38,999
I'm not sure I need
to go to the other side.
1070
00:52:39,132 --> 00:52:41,802
You sure you do?
1071
00:52:41,935 --> 00:52:43,503
I didn't know we had
to be needed
1072
00:52:43,636 --> 00:52:46,172
any more than a fireman
or a plumber or a fish
1073
00:52:46,306 --> 00:52:48,675
does to be in an afterlife.
1074
00:52:48,808 --> 00:52:51,244
I'd like to try anyway, right?
1075
00:52:51,378 --> 00:52:53,581
Well, knock yourself out.
1076
00:52:53,714 --> 00:52:56,282
Me, I'm gonna spend
my last days
1077
00:52:56,417 --> 00:52:58,451
watching that chick's ass
clench and unclench
1078
00:52:58,585 --> 00:53:01,288
as she brushes her hair
all day.
1079
00:53:01,422 --> 00:53:02,690
I win.
1080
00:53:02,822 --> 00:53:06,594
Yeah, I mean,
I guess while I'm here,
1081
00:53:06,726 --> 00:53:10,062
why not just stick around
for a while, right?
1082
00:53:10,197 --> 00:53:12,165
Seriously, man.
1083
00:53:12,299 --> 00:53:15,101
Where else've got to go?
1084
00:53:15,235 --> 00:53:17,438
Who else you got left?
1085
00:53:39,292 --> 00:53:40,828
That's so weird.
1086
00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:44,631
So all the little critters
can see the dead?
1087
00:53:45,532 --> 00:53:48,467
I do not get the rules
of this shit yet.
1088
00:53:48,601 --> 00:53:51,538
They said I could go anywhere
in the world that I wanted.
1089
00:53:51,672 --> 00:53:54,675
Money's no object now,
not worth a dime.
1090
00:53:54,808 --> 00:53:58,612
Even a dime isn't worth
a dime now.
1091
00:53:58,746 --> 00:54:03,150
I'm a dime that's not worth
ten cents anymore.
1092
00:54:03,284 --> 00:54:04,818
There's nothing between me
1093
00:54:04,951 --> 00:54:08,421
and the vastness
of all eternity at this point.
1094
00:54:08,556 --> 00:54:11,792
Time finally feels finite
for me,
1095
00:54:11,926 --> 00:54:15,096
but I guess it always was.
1096
00:54:15,228 --> 00:54:19,565
And yet,
I sit, and I waste time.
1097
00:54:19,699 --> 00:54:22,835
So which is better?
1098
00:54:22,969 --> 00:54:25,638
Savoring it in the sunshine,
or working my ass off
1099
00:54:25,772 --> 00:54:28,942
for a goal
I may never reach anyway?
1100
00:54:29,076 --> 00:54:31,779
Is a dog smart for laying
in the sun for all its days,
1101
00:54:31,911 --> 00:54:35,882
or does he really just lick
his balls because he can?
1102
00:54:36,016 --> 00:54:38,185
That's the question, right?
1103
00:54:38,317 --> 00:54:42,955
Oh, God, I hope
they can't hear my thoughts.
1104
00:54:45,058 --> 00:54:49,128
Okay, whoever
or whatever you are,
1105
00:54:49,261 --> 00:54:51,030
you want to allow for magic?
1106
00:54:51,163 --> 00:54:53,499
Well, I'm gonna walk
in a random direction
1107
00:54:53,634 --> 00:54:54,967
and go to the first place
that I see.
1108
00:54:55,101 --> 00:54:57,705
I don't care
if it's a freaking Taco Bell.
1109
00:54:57,837 --> 00:55:01,040
Heads East Side,
tails West Side.
1110
00:55:01,942 --> 00:55:03,110
Heads.
1111
00:55:07,114 --> 00:55:08,282
God.
1112
00:55:46,018 --> 00:55:48,654
Shit, you're not dead.
Great.
1113
00:55:48,788 --> 00:55:50,858
That's your opening line?
1114
00:55:53,761 --> 00:55:56,897
Excuse me?
1115
00:55:58,665 --> 00:56:00,234
You can hear me and see me?
1116
00:56:00,366 --> 00:56:02,435
What were you looking for?
1117
00:56:02,569 --> 00:56:06,339
Uh, I was just looking
to meet a girl.
1118
00:56:06,473 --> 00:56:08,542
Any girl?
1119
00:56:08,674 --> 00:56:10,476
I guess so.
1120
00:56:10,610 --> 00:56:12,946
Well, they don't see you,
but I can.
1121
00:56:13,080 --> 00:56:16,250
- Okay, you're confusing me.
- I know.
1122
00:56:16,382 --> 00:56:18,484
You've got that faraway look
in your eyes.
1123
00:56:18,618 --> 00:56:20,286
Like a...
1124
00:56:20,420 --> 00:56:22,556
Like a dog humping a leg.
1125
00:56:23,956 --> 00:56:26,292
So...
1126
00:56:26,427 --> 00:56:28,528
You know I'm dead,
1127
00:56:28,661 --> 00:56:30,196
but you don't seem surprised.
1128
00:56:30,331 --> 00:56:33,968
I mean, how can you see me?
1129
00:56:34,101 --> 00:56:36,703
Well...
1130
00:56:36,837 --> 00:56:39,172
I guess
I'm very intuitive.
1131
00:56:40,339 --> 00:56:43,910
I've been seeing this stuff
a lot lately.
1132
00:56:47,246 --> 00:56:50,350
Why are you here?
1133
00:56:50,484 --> 00:56:53,819
Well, I died
alone, apparently.
1134
00:56:53,953 --> 00:56:56,522
Why did you die alone?
1135
00:56:56,656 --> 00:57:00,159
I was picky, really picky.
1136
00:57:00,293 --> 00:57:04,131
Yeah, I was single a lot.
1137
00:57:04,264 --> 00:57:05,798
Weren't you lonely?
1138
00:57:05,931 --> 00:57:09,235
I was.
Yes, I was lonely.
1139
00:57:09,369 --> 00:57:11,804
And why are you still alone?
1140
00:57:11,938 --> 00:57:13,440
You know, I could ask you
the same question.
1141
00:57:13,574 --> 00:57:16,109
Well, you could, but I'm not
the one who's dead.
1142
00:57:18,545 --> 00:57:20,147
But you are alone.
I mean...
1143
00:57:20,279 --> 00:57:22,248
Why are you alone today,
for instance?
1144
00:57:22,382 --> 00:57:24,884
Because my friend Faith
is always late.
1145
00:57:25,018 --> 00:57:26,552
She's probably gonna text me
any second
1146
00:57:26,686 --> 00:57:31,991
to say she can't make it,
because she always does that.
1147
00:57:32,125 --> 00:57:34,060
Yeah, but if she wasn't late,
1148
00:57:34,194 --> 00:57:37,364
I mean,
you would have never met me.
1149
00:57:37,498 --> 00:57:39,566
True.
1150
00:57:39,699 --> 00:57:41,701
Wow.
You can see me.
1151
00:57:41,835 --> 00:57:44,638
Okay, what else do you see?
1152
00:57:44,770 --> 00:57:47,640
I see you, and I see
1153
00:57:47,775 --> 00:57:51,811
shifty little flickers
of people
1154
00:57:51,944 --> 00:57:53,980
in the corner of my eyes.
1155
00:57:55,482 --> 00:57:59,719
Wow.
I mean, that's lucky.
1156
00:57:59,853 --> 00:58:01,154
You're lucky.
1157
00:58:01,286 --> 00:58:03,290
I mean, I didn't see
any of that when I was alive.
1158
00:58:03,424 --> 00:58:05,659
I don't know if it's lucky.
1159
00:58:05,793 --> 00:58:09,597
I mean, maybe, maybe.
Or maybe I'm cursed.
1160
00:58:12,799 --> 00:58:14,768
You know how people say
you find someone
1161
00:58:14,900 --> 00:58:16,902
when you stop looking?
1162
00:58:17,036 --> 00:58:18,705
Well, that means
I'm officially screwed,
1163
00:58:18,839 --> 00:58:21,775
because if I don't find anyone,
I am gone eternally.
1164
00:58:21,907 --> 00:58:23,543
I mean,
I can never stop looking.
1165
00:58:23,677 --> 00:58:25,679
Can you find a way
to stop looking?
1166
00:58:25,811 --> 00:58:27,781
Okay, well, how do I do that?
1167
00:58:27,913 --> 00:58:31,250
Well, maybe think
about something else?
1168
00:58:31,384 --> 00:58:32,519
Like what?
1169
00:58:32,652 --> 00:58:34,821
I don't know.
Like...
1170
00:58:34,953 --> 00:58:36,389
Do you like baseball?
1171
00:58:36,522 --> 00:58:37,956
I love baseball.
You?
1172
00:58:38,090 --> 00:58:42,061
- Of course not.
- That figures.
1173
00:58:44,663 --> 00:58:46,532
You're good at this.
1174
00:58:46,665 --> 00:58:48,133
So, I guess
we're not soul mates,
1175
00:58:48,268 --> 00:58:50,570
or else we'd be whisked away
into the sky
1176
00:58:50,703 --> 00:58:52,272
or something like that?
1177
00:58:52,404 --> 00:58:55,508
Yeah, we're not soul mates.
Sorry, it's not gonna work.
1178
00:58:55,641 --> 00:58:56,908
What, you think even
the universe
1179
00:58:57,043 --> 00:58:58,678
thinks you're too good for me?
1180
00:58:58,811 --> 00:59:01,949
Well, because I'm alive
and you're dead.
1181
00:59:03,215 --> 00:59:05,018
Yeah.
1182
00:59:16,862 --> 00:59:18,866
Be right back.
1183
00:59:22,735 --> 00:59:24,371
Ugh.
1184
00:59:24,503 --> 00:59:26,005
Either somebody's
fucking with you,
1185
00:59:26,139 --> 00:59:28,275
or you really do have
the worst luck.
1186
00:59:30,076 --> 00:59:33,413
Couldn't meet a nice dead girl
like normal people.
1187
00:59:52,331 --> 00:59:54,268
All right.
1188
00:59:57,804 --> 00:59:58,972
Such a New York cliché,
1189
00:59:59,105 --> 01:00:02,442
spending the afterlife
haunting dive bars.
1190
01:00:07,179 --> 01:00:10,250
Yeah, no, I'm just trying
to think this all through.
1191
01:00:10,384 --> 01:00:12,685
- You think too much.
- Really?
1192
01:00:12,819 --> 01:00:14,321
Yeah.
1193
01:00:14,453 --> 01:00:16,388
Why don't you focus
on what you're here for?
1194
01:00:16,522 --> 01:00:18,357
I just don't get it.
I mean, why can you hear me?
1195
01:00:18,491 --> 01:00:19,993
Why can you see me?
Why do you understand this?
1196
01:00:20,125 --> 01:00:22,361
I don't get it either,
trust me.
1197
01:00:22,494 --> 01:00:25,766
I've just been seeing
this stuff a lot lately.
1198
01:00:25,898 --> 01:00:28,067
I see it fleetingly.
1199
01:00:28,201 --> 01:00:29,769
But, believe it or not,
I've never struck up
1200
01:00:29,902 --> 01:00:31,971
a conversation
with one of you before.
1201
01:00:32,105 --> 01:00:35,308
Yeah, but...
I just...
1202
01:00:35,442 --> 01:00:36,743
You don't seem like the kind
of woman
1203
01:00:36,877 --> 01:00:38,578
who would be alone, either.
1204
01:00:38,712 --> 01:00:39,980
I mean, it just
doesn't make sense.
1205
01:00:40,112 --> 01:00:41,179
You mean, like,
what's wrong with me?
1206
01:00:41,313 --> 01:00:42,815
Yeah, yeah.
What's wrong with you?
1207
01:00:42,949 --> 01:00:45,519
Well, maybe I'm alone
because I'm picky.
1208
01:00:46,552 --> 01:00:50,991
And I'm picky because I'm
looking for something magical.
1209
01:00:56,563 --> 01:00:58,965
And I'm...
1210
01:00:59,866 --> 01:01:04,371
I'm kind of,
sort of... being stalked.
1211
01:01:05,971 --> 01:01:08,241
Come again?
1212
01:01:11,545 --> 01:01:12,612
By who?
1213
01:01:12,746 --> 01:01:17,284
Who?
This guy...
1214
01:01:18,018 --> 01:01:19,452
His name's Patrick.
1215
01:01:19,585 --> 01:01:22,589
And all I ever did
was have dinner with him once,
1216
01:01:22,723 --> 01:01:25,190
and I told him
I didn't want to be with him.
1217
01:01:25,324 --> 01:01:28,527
He said that he could wait
for me,
1218
01:01:28,661 --> 01:01:32,364
and he sends me weird emails,
1219
01:01:32,498 --> 01:01:35,400
watches me from a distance,
follows me everywhere I go.
1220
01:01:35,534 --> 01:01:37,369
He makes every guy
I talk to uncomfortable.
1221
01:01:37,503 --> 01:01:38,739
Yeah.
1222
01:01:38,871 --> 01:01:40,339
I'm getting uncomfortable
just hearing this.
1223
01:01:40,473 --> 01:01:43,177
I mean, why did you have dinner
with him in the first place?
1224
01:01:44,177 --> 01:01:46,479
Because he was my boss
at the time,
1225
01:01:46,612 --> 01:01:48,748
and he was nice
in the beginning.
1226
01:01:48,882 --> 01:01:50,850
I can understand
that, I guess.
1227
01:01:50,982 --> 01:01:52,985
Okay, so, where is he?
Is he here?
1228
01:01:53,118 --> 01:01:54,887
No, I hope not.
1229
01:01:55,020 --> 01:01:58,090
I managed to lose him
in the subway.
1230
01:01:58,223 --> 01:01:59,792
Anyway, can we talk
about something else?
1231
01:01:59,926 --> 01:02:02,061
Sure, okay.
I know guys like that.
1232
01:02:02,194 --> 01:02:05,030
I always try to not be one.
You know?
1233
01:02:05,165 --> 01:02:09,136
I walk away if I buy a girl
a drink, you know?
1234
01:02:09,268 --> 01:02:11,036
Because I don't want to be
the kind of guy that thinks
1235
01:02:11,170 --> 01:02:13,072
that the girl necessarily wants
to talk to him all night
1236
01:02:13,206 --> 01:02:15,208
just because he's being polite.
1237
01:02:15,342 --> 01:02:16,976
You know, I buy her a drink.
1238
01:02:17,110 --> 01:02:19,613
Doesn't mean you owe me one.
1239
01:02:19,746 --> 01:02:21,381
Doesn't mean I'm in.
1240
01:02:21,514 --> 01:02:24,282
You're such a hero.
1241
01:02:24,417 --> 01:02:28,520
Ah, what a time
to find myself dead.
1242
01:02:28,654 --> 01:02:31,557
You know, I was even late
for my own funeral.
1243
01:02:31,690 --> 01:02:35,060
My dad always says
I have natural bad timing.
1244
01:02:38,797 --> 01:02:41,301
That's really nice,
but I don't understand you.
1245
01:02:41,433 --> 01:02:43,136
I know.
1246
01:02:45,038 --> 01:02:47,840
I'm Michael.
What's your name?
1247
01:02:47,973 --> 01:02:49,141
Honey Bee.
1248
01:02:49,275 --> 01:02:50,410
Okay, if you don't want
to tell me,
1249
01:02:50,543 --> 01:02:52,744
you can just say so.
I know we just met.
1250
01:02:52,878 --> 01:02:53,913
You don't believe me?
1251
01:02:54,045 --> 01:02:55,314
I don't believe you.
1252
01:02:55,447 --> 01:02:57,350
You want to see
my birth certificate?
1253
01:02:57,482 --> 01:02:58,384
You know what?
1254
01:02:58,518 --> 01:02:59,686
Actually, I was gonna guess
that name.
1255
01:02:59,819 --> 01:03:01,153
Oh, yeah?
1256
01:03:01,288 --> 01:03:03,121
Did you have a crazy nickname
growing up
1257
01:03:03,255 --> 01:03:04,456
like "Lisa" or "Susan"?
1258
01:03:04,589 --> 01:03:05,491
No.
1259
01:03:05,625 --> 01:03:07,827
So, everybody calls you
"Honey Bee"?
1260
01:03:07,960 --> 01:03:09,228
Honey Bee.
1261
01:03:09,362 --> 01:03:12,532
I mean, my mom
calls me "honey" or "bee."
1262
01:03:12,665 --> 01:03:14,132
And my dad calls me "HB."
1263
01:03:14,266 --> 01:03:17,236
So your parents were WASPs?
1264
01:03:19,339 --> 01:03:20,139
Bad joke.
1265
01:03:20,272 --> 01:03:21,907
Terrible joke.
1266
01:03:22,042 --> 01:03:23,976
Sorry.
1267
01:03:24,110 --> 01:03:26,145
What do you do, Honey Bee?
1268
01:03:26,279 --> 01:03:29,014
Uff, I hate that question.
1269
01:03:29,148 --> 01:03:30,215
What?
Come on, I'm dead.
1270
01:03:30,350 --> 01:03:32,085
What, am I gonna judge you?
1271
01:03:32,217 --> 01:03:34,353
What about you?
What did you do?
1272
01:03:34,487 --> 01:03:37,223
Most of the time,
I was an actor,
1273
01:03:37,357 --> 01:03:40,393
and I spent years developing
this one-man show.
1274
01:03:40,527 --> 01:03:41,594
Don't laugh, okay?
1275
01:03:41,728 --> 01:03:43,496
It was gonna be,
like, the first non-shitty one
1276
01:03:43,630 --> 01:03:46,465
in like forever, okay.
And it was...
1277
01:03:46,600 --> 01:03:48,701
It was gonna open soon.
1278
01:03:48,835 --> 01:03:50,003
I was also a waiter.
1279
01:03:50,136 --> 01:03:53,439
Yeah, because that's the law
for actors.
1280
01:03:53,572 --> 01:03:56,042
Why don't you want to talk
about what you do?
1281
01:03:56,174 --> 01:03:59,511
Because it's...
1282
01:03:59,645 --> 01:04:00,913
another New York cliché.
1283
01:04:01,047 --> 01:04:03,715
Nah, come on.
Hit me.
1284
01:04:04,150 --> 01:04:08,121
Well, basically,
I do three things.
1285
01:04:08,253 --> 01:04:10,889
I work at an office.
1286
01:04:11,023 --> 01:04:12,357
I, uh...
1287
01:04:12,491 --> 01:04:13,792
No, sorry.
Just kidding.
1288
01:04:13,927 --> 01:04:15,328
That's not nice!
1289
01:04:15,462 --> 01:04:16,862
It's a joke,
another bad joke.
1290
01:04:16,996 --> 01:04:21,032
The worst joke ever.
It's the worst joke ever.
1291
01:04:21,167 --> 01:04:24,136
Never mind,
what else did you do?
1292
01:04:24,270 --> 01:04:27,506
I'm a dog walker.
I walk dogs.
1293
01:04:27,639 --> 01:04:28,975
- Oh.
- Okay?
1294
01:04:29,109 --> 01:04:30,944
I even walked
David Bowie's dogs once.
1295
01:04:31,076 --> 01:04:33,412
- No.
- Yeah, now you're interested.
1296
01:04:33,547 --> 01:04:35,115
- I am interested.
- Yeah.
1297
01:04:35,248 --> 01:04:37,884
- What was his name?
- His name was Mickey.
1298
01:04:38,018 --> 01:04:40,753
He was really ugly, ugly dog.
1299
01:04:40,886 --> 01:04:42,955
Wow.
So, you work in an office
1300
01:04:43,089 --> 01:04:44,357
- and you walk dogs?
- Yeah.
1301
01:04:44,489 --> 01:04:46,859
- What else do you do?
- And I do...
1302
01:04:46,993 --> 01:04:48,427
That I do it on the side.
1303
01:04:48,560 --> 01:04:50,295
I don't really make
a living right now out of it.
1304
01:04:50,429 --> 01:04:52,130
- Well...
- I'm a photographer.
1305
01:04:52,264 --> 01:04:54,034
That's my passion.
1306
01:04:54,167 --> 01:04:55,402
Okay, so you know what?
1307
01:04:55,534 --> 01:04:59,004
To me, you're a photographer
that walks dogs.
1308
01:04:59,138 --> 01:05:01,574
Yeah, exactly.
1309
01:05:09,248 --> 01:05:12,051
My friend
just canceled on me.
1310
01:05:12,185 --> 01:05:14,219
I mean, she's not coming.
1311
01:05:14,353 --> 01:05:16,188
Do you want to...
1312
01:05:16,322 --> 01:05:18,625
Do you want to...
1313
01:05:18,757 --> 01:05:21,426
get out of here?
1314
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:22,594
Yeah...
1315
01:05:22,728 --> 01:05:24,330
I hope you don't mean that
as a euphemism,
1316
01:05:24,464 --> 01:05:26,498
because I will
severely disappoint you.
1317
01:05:27,567 --> 01:05:30,237
Come on, let me show you
something amazing.
1318
01:05:40,313 --> 01:05:42,816
Got to admit, I expected
Eiffel Tower,
1319
01:05:42,949 --> 01:05:45,017
pyramids, Taj Mahal.
1320
01:05:45,150 --> 01:05:48,053
- You want to try it?
- Ha, yeah.
1321
01:05:48,186 --> 01:05:49,656
Would if I could.
1322
01:05:49,790 --> 01:05:52,324
Guess that's easy
to say, right?
1323
01:05:53,058 --> 01:05:54,060
You?
1324
01:05:54,192 --> 01:05:55,594
No way.
1325
01:05:55,728 --> 01:05:58,330
What if I fall and there's
no one there to catch me?
1326
01:05:58,464 --> 01:06:00,465
That's what the net's for.
1327
01:06:00,600 --> 01:06:02,302
You never know if anyone's
gonna be there to catch you.
1328
01:06:02,435 --> 01:06:04,937
I mean, pfft.
That's life, girl.
1329
01:06:05,071 --> 01:06:06,605
You're a little cynical,
aren't you?
1330
01:06:06,739 --> 01:06:09,810
Yeah, you see how optimistic
you are when you're dead.
1331
01:06:12,078 --> 01:06:13,380
You know what?
Scratch that.
1332
01:06:13,513 --> 01:06:14,813
That sounded way better
in my head.
1333
01:06:14,947 --> 01:06:16,850
I'm sure.
1334
01:06:18,750 --> 01:06:20,786
Did you ever jump out
of an airplane?
1335
01:06:20,920 --> 01:06:22,755
No, no.
1336
01:06:22,889 --> 01:06:26,325
I always figured
I would, though, you know?
1337
01:06:26,458 --> 01:06:28,161
I've been killed by a truck.
1338
01:06:28,295 --> 01:06:31,031
That's got to be, like,
half credit, right?
1339
01:06:31,163 --> 01:06:32,831
You?
1340
01:06:32,965 --> 01:06:35,234
Never.
1341
01:06:35,368 --> 01:06:38,705
Would've been nice
to do it with you.
1342
01:06:42,275 --> 01:06:44,277
Scratch that, sounded
way better in my head.
1343
01:06:48,947 --> 01:06:50,783
Why me?
1344
01:06:52,853 --> 01:06:56,055
I don't know.
Why not?
1345
01:06:56,188 --> 01:06:57,422
You want to get out of here?
1346
01:06:57,556 --> 01:06:59,658
I mean, unless one
of these guys falls,
1347
01:06:59,792 --> 01:07:01,594
I think we've seen
all this has to offer.
1348
01:07:01,728 --> 01:07:03,563
Are you worried
a new dead guy will show up
1349
01:07:03,697 --> 01:07:06,032
- and sweep me off my feet?
- Yeah, a little.
1350
01:07:06,165 --> 01:07:08,434
That net looks flimsy,
like it could dice someone.
1351
01:07:08,567 --> 01:07:10,603
Come on, take a walk?
1352
01:07:10,737 --> 01:07:12,638
Take a walk.
1353
01:07:12,772 --> 01:07:14,607
Take a walk.
1354
01:07:29,288 --> 01:07:30,924
Hey, look.
1355
01:07:31,056 --> 01:07:33,659
There goes "stressing out about
her yoga relaxation seminar."
1356
01:07:33,793 --> 01:07:35,795
She doesn't seem
really stressed out.
1357
01:07:35,927 --> 01:07:37,096
She seems, like, mad.
1358
01:07:37,230 --> 01:07:39,099
Everybody's stressed out
in New York.
1359
01:07:39,232 --> 01:07:41,835
- Are you stressed out?
- Not anymore.
1360
01:07:43,402 --> 01:07:45,904
I'm hungry.
Are you hungry?
1361
01:07:46,038 --> 01:07:47,139
I think you're amazing,
1362
01:07:47,272 --> 01:07:50,508
but I can't take you out
to dinner
1363
01:07:50,643 --> 01:07:52,845
or back to my place
or any place.
1364
01:07:52,978 --> 01:07:54,446
I don't really have a place.
1365
01:07:54,581 --> 01:07:56,148
So where do you live?
1366
01:07:56,281 --> 01:07:58,884
Everywhere and nowhere.
1367
01:08:01,286 --> 01:08:03,857
Hey, um...
1368
01:08:03,989 --> 01:08:06,359
Have you ever been married?
1369
01:08:06,491 --> 01:08:08,393
That's a pretty
straightforward question.
1370
01:08:08,527 --> 01:08:10,829
Well, I'm a straightforward
kind of guy.
1371
01:08:11,664 --> 01:08:16,201
Well, I've been close enough
to know I'm not really a fan.
1372
01:08:16,335 --> 01:08:20,206
- You?
- Same, yeah.
1373
01:08:27,413 --> 01:08:29,982
It's really dark in here.
Probably get mugged.
1374
01:08:30,115 --> 01:08:31,083
And I can't help you.
1375
01:08:31,217 --> 01:08:33,954
Sorry.
1376
01:08:34,087 --> 01:08:35,154
Bad joke.
1377
01:08:35,288 --> 01:08:37,490
- Anyways...
- Horrible joke.
1378
01:08:38,423 --> 01:08:40,694
What kind of music do you like?
1379
01:08:40,826 --> 01:08:42,995
Oh, good question.
1380
01:08:43,129 --> 01:08:47,834
I like everything
from hard rock to folk.
1381
01:08:47,967 --> 01:08:49,802
I like anything rich
with feeling.
1382
01:08:49,936 --> 01:08:51,404
Genuine, true.
1383
01:08:51,538 --> 01:08:54,340
I like it raw.
How about you?
1384
01:08:54,473 --> 01:08:57,877
Oh, I'm the opposite.
Zero feeling whatsoever.
1385
01:08:58,812 --> 01:09:02,082
Oh, you're joking, okay.
Ha, ha, I get it.
1386
01:09:02,214 --> 01:09:03,615
- "Ha, ha"!
- I get it.
1387
01:09:03,749 --> 01:09:05,050
What kind of answer is that?
Come on.
1388
01:09:05,183 --> 01:09:06,186
What, you want a list?
1389
01:09:06,319 --> 01:09:07,652
Yeah, of course
I want a list.
1390
01:09:07,786 --> 01:09:12,290
Okay, okay.
I like Beatles, Stones, Dylan.
1391
01:09:12,424 --> 01:09:16,695
- I love Dylan.
- Ramones, Marilyn Manson.
1392
01:09:16,829 --> 01:09:21,399
- Marilyn Manson?
- Yeah, Joni, Johnny Cash.
1393
01:09:21,534 --> 01:09:22,936
How about you?
1394
01:09:23,069 --> 01:09:24,670
The Beatles.
1395
01:09:26,106 --> 01:09:27,639
- Is that it?
- Yep.
1396
01:09:27,772 --> 01:09:30,441
To me, everything comes
back to the Beatles.
1397
01:09:30,575 --> 01:09:33,745
All right.
Guess that's all you need.
1398
01:09:33,879 --> 01:09:36,482
Hey, look.
1399
01:09:38,450 --> 01:09:40,687
Dakota Building.
1400
01:09:40,820 --> 01:09:42,621
Yes, indeed.
1401
01:09:42,755 --> 01:09:45,491
Can you believe Yoko
still lives there?
1402
01:09:46,392 --> 01:09:47,594
Like so many years later,
1403
01:09:47,727 --> 01:09:50,329
she has to walk
past that tragedy every day.
1404
01:09:50,463 --> 01:09:52,231
- It's crazy.
- Yeah, it is crazy.
1405
01:09:52,365 --> 01:09:53,900
I never
really thought about it.
1406
01:09:54,034 --> 01:09:55,168
Be like if Jackie O had
1407
01:09:55,302 --> 01:09:57,770
an apartment
at the Book Depository.
1408
01:09:58,737 --> 01:10:03,942
Do you think Yoko's
still the same person she was?
1409
01:10:04,076 --> 01:10:06,846
You know, after 30 years,
1410
01:10:06,978 --> 01:10:09,315
after losing
the great love of her life?
1411
01:10:09,449 --> 01:10:13,820
Of course she is.
Yoko will always be Yoko.
1412
01:10:14,853 --> 01:10:17,356
What do you think
she's doing?
1413
01:10:17,490 --> 01:10:19,892
What do you mean?
Right now?
1414
01:10:20,026 --> 01:10:21,828
Yeah.
1415
01:10:21,960 --> 01:10:23,795
I don't know.
1416
01:10:23,929 --> 01:10:27,534
Pretty sure
she's doing something amazing.
1417
01:10:35,574 --> 01:10:37,911
How does it feel like?
1418
01:10:39,277 --> 01:10:42,214
- What, being dead?
- Yeah.
1419
01:10:42,347 --> 01:10:45,250
Do you feel like
cold, weightless?
1420
01:10:45,384 --> 01:10:48,553
No, no, I don't feel
anything at all.
1421
01:10:48,687 --> 01:10:51,623
That's the weird part.
I don't feel anything.
1422
01:10:51,757 --> 01:10:56,562
I don't feel hot or cold,
tired, horny.
1423
01:10:56,695 --> 01:10:58,097
- Really?
- Yeah.
1424
01:10:58,231 --> 01:10:59,665
You know what it's like?
1425
01:10:59,798 --> 01:11:04,203
It's like being outside
a giant restaurant window
1426
01:11:04,337 --> 01:11:07,240
and watching
everybody else eat.
1427
01:11:07,373 --> 01:11:08,941
It's like fucking the world
1428
01:11:09,074 --> 01:11:11,710
through three
really thick condoms.
1429
01:11:11,843 --> 01:11:15,114
- That's a good image.
- Yeah.
1430
01:11:15,248 --> 01:11:19,119
I used to feel so much
when I was alive, you know.
1431
01:11:20,285 --> 01:11:23,789
Sometimes life was too much.
1432
01:11:23,923 --> 01:11:27,927
It could be love, it could be
happiness, nostalgia.
1433
01:11:29,061 --> 01:11:33,767
Feeling someone else's pain,
someone else's sadness.
1434
01:11:35,133 --> 01:11:36,801
I could look at a dog
not understand
1435
01:11:36,936 --> 01:11:38,438
why it was being spanked,
1436
01:11:38,570 --> 01:11:41,373
and that feeling
would overwhelm me, you know?
1437
01:11:41,508 --> 01:11:45,978
A D-minor chord could just
make me break down and cry.
1438
01:11:46,980 --> 01:11:49,549
You're such a pussy.
1439
01:11:53,718 --> 01:11:58,490
And what about now?
Like, you don't feel anything?
1440
01:11:58,624 --> 01:12:00,627
Well, right now...
1441
01:12:00,759 --> 01:12:05,397
The only thing I can feel
is drunk and way drunker.
1442
01:12:05,530 --> 01:12:08,600
And...
1443
01:12:10,870 --> 01:12:14,474
I feel something for you.
1444
01:12:17,375 --> 01:12:19,878
From you.
1445
01:12:22,514 --> 01:12:25,017
What do you feel from me?
1446
01:12:27,419 --> 01:12:28,888
Not quite sure.
1447
01:12:29,021 --> 01:12:32,523
Trying to put my finger on it.
1448
01:12:48,106 --> 01:12:49,708
What would you like
to feel most
1449
01:12:49,842 --> 01:12:53,946
if you could choose
to feel anything?
1450
01:12:54,079 --> 01:12:56,215
Don't say me.
1451
01:12:57,615 --> 01:13:01,186
Okay, don't laugh.
1452
01:13:02,987 --> 01:13:06,558
That tingling feeling you get
when someone you love
1453
01:13:06,692 --> 01:13:09,695
is thinking
about you from far away.
1454
01:13:10,996 --> 01:13:16,936
You know, that connection
when a girl is missing you.
1455
01:13:20,606 --> 01:13:22,141
Any girl?
1456
01:13:32,750 --> 01:13:34,954
Hey, watch it.
1457
01:13:47,900 --> 01:13:50,302
Sorry I made you cross
between those two cars.
1458
01:13:50,435 --> 01:13:52,737
Huh? What'd you say?
1459
01:13:52,871 --> 01:13:54,240
Where do you live, here?
1460
01:13:54,373 --> 01:13:57,610
- Yeah, right here. Fuck.
- What's the matter?
1461
01:13:57,744 --> 01:13:58,978
It's him.
1462
01:13:59,111 --> 01:14:00,445
Hey, Honey Bee.
I just want to talk.
1463
01:14:00,579 --> 01:14:01,746
Patrick, I asked you not
to come here.
1464
01:14:01,880 --> 01:14:03,081
It makes me
really uncomfortable.
1465
01:14:03,214 --> 01:14:05,784
As you can see,
I'm with someone right now.
1466
01:14:06,584 --> 01:14:08,553
Uhh?
1467
01:14:08,687 --> 01:14:10,623
I mean, I'm meeting
someone, okay?
1468
01:14:10,757 --> 01:14:12,225
- Can I...
- Well, that's totally okay.
1469
01:14:12,357 --> 01:14:13,258
I just wanted to talk.
1470
01:14:13,392 --> 01:14:14,994
If...
1471
01:14:15,128 --> 01:14:16,629
I'm not trying to bother you.
If you just give me a moment.
1472
01:14:16,762 --> 01:14:18,563
No, I said no.
1473
01:14:18,697 --> 01:14:19,865
Now I'm gonna go inside,
1474
01:14:19,999 --> 01:14:22,468
and I'm gonna ask you
to nicely leave me.
1475
01:14:22,601 --> 01:14:25,170
You're gonna make me be mean,
and I don't wanna be mean.
1476
01:14:25,303 --> 01:14:26,972
There's no need for you
not to be nice.
1477
01:14:27,106 --> 01:14:28,808
I was just trying to see
if there might be some way to...
1478
01:14:28,941 --> 01:14:30,310
Who is this guy?
Is this the guy?
1479
01:14:30,442 --> 01:14:32,710
- I told you about him.
- So who's the guy?
1480
01:14:32,844 --> 01:14:34,679
- Is he bothering you?
- Is he bothering you?
1481
01:14:34,813 --> 01:14:36,147
Listen, I tried calling.
1482
01:14:36,281 --> 01:14:37,984
I just want to have
one conversation, okay?
1483
01:14:38,116 --> 01:14:40,319
Yeah, okay, we just did,
so now I'm gonna...
1484
01:14:40,451 --> 01:14:42,187
If today isn't good
because I just showed up
1485
01:14:42,321 --> 01:14:44,088
then maybe we can talk
tomorrow?
1486
01:14:44,222 --> 01:14:45,657
I really think
you misunderstood me,
1487
01:14:45,792 --> 01:14:47,125
and I just want a chance
to explain myself.
1488
01:14:47,259 --> 01:14:49,195
Patrick, if you show up
at my house again,
1489
01:14:49,328 --> 01:14:52,330
you're gonna have a problem.
Just... can I get in?
1490
01:14:52,463 --> 01:14:54,266
Can you try seeing it
from where I'm coming from?
1491
01:14:54,400 --> 01:14:56,067
I don't care
where you're coming from!
1492
01:14:56,200 --> 01:14:57,703
You're gonna make me not nice,
and I don't like that.
1493
01:14:57,837 --> 01:14:59,504
- So be nice.
- Don't touch me!
1494
01:14:59,637 --> 01:15:00,972
I really want
to clock this guy!
1495
01:15:01,106 --> 01:15:03,042
I've never wanted to fist
a face so bad in my life.
1496
01:15:03,174 --> 01:15:05,677
Ah, that sounded way better
in my head.
1497
01:15:05,811 --> 01:15:06,879
Can you please stop
doing this?
1498
01:15:07,012 --> 01:15:08,179
Honestly, like,
you're a nice guy...
1499
01:15:08,313 --> 01:15:10,148
I can't.
I told you, I can't give up.
1500
01:15:10,281 --> 01:15:11,950
- I understand, I understand.
- Yes, you can! Just walk away!
1501
01:15:12,084 --> 01:15:15,955
You affected me.
Okay, I was alone.
1502
01:15:16,088 --> 01:15:18,189
I was waiting for years
to feel something for someone
1503
01:15:18,322 --> 01:15:20,225
and I felt it for you.
I don't know.
1504
01:15:20,359 --> 01:15:22,294
- And I understand.
- And I can't give up on that.
1505
01:15:22,427 --> 01:15:24,797
I understand, but I don't
have feelings for you.
1506
01:15:24,931 --> 01:15:27,566
So, what do we do now?
I try to be friends with you,
1507
01:15:27,700 --> 01:15:29,168
but you don't seem
to understand it.
1508
01:15:29,302 --> 01:15:31,270
This started as a friendship,
but it became more.
1509
01:15:31,402 --> 01:15:32,605
Well, maybe for you,
1510
01:15:32,737 --> 01:15:34,307
but not for me,
and don't touch me, please.
1511
01:15:34,440 --> 01:15:35,941
Listen, Honey Bee, you're
being way too nice, all right?
1512
01:15:36,074 --> 01:15:37,176
You've got to drop the hammer
on this guy.
1513
01:15:37,310 --> 01:15:38,777
Maybe even a table saw,
come on.
1514
01:15:38,910 --> 01:15:41,079
- Really?
- Tell him to leave you alone.
1515
01:15:41,213 --> 01:15:42,480
- Yell at him, go!
- Really?
1516
01:15:42,615 --> 01:15:45,451
Come on, yeah!
Come on.
1517
01:15:45,584 --> 01:15:47,787
- Yell?
- Yeah.
1518
01:15:49,120 --> 01:15:50,655
Okay.
1519
01:15:50,789 --> 01:15:54,292
Patrick, leave me alone.
1520
01:15:54,427 --> 01:15:55,761
Could have been
a little harder.
1521
01:15:55,895 --> 01:15:57,295
Leave me alone!
Okay?
1522
01:15:57,429 --> 01:15:59,264
- There you go.
- Okay, okay, okay, okay.
1523
01:15:59,398 --> 01:16:01,200
- I hear you.
- No, you don't hear me,
1524
01:16:01,333 --> 01:16:02,901
because you're still here,
so get out of here!
1525
01:16:03,035 --> 01:16:04,604
But I think I can show you
that you're wrong.
1526
01:16:04,736 --> 01:16:06,672
I think we are in love.
I know that we are in love.
1527
01:16:06,806 --> 01:16:08,272
We're not in love,
I'm not in love with you.
1528
01:16:08,406 --> 01:16:09,909
- We're not...
- If it's this other guy?
1529
01:16:10,042 --> 01:16:11,678
Then I can tell you
he is gonna fail you.
1530
01:16:11,811 --> 01:16:13,344
No one is gonna love you
like I'm gonna love you.
1531
01:16:13,478 --> 01:16:15,447
And if there's something about
me that doesn't measure up
1532
01:16:15,580 --> 01:16:18,282
that you don't like,
then I can make it better.
1533
01:16:18,417 --> 01:16:20,151
I am incredibly capable
of change.
1534
01:16:20,285 --> 01:16:22,020
- I can be better!
- You don't need to change!
1535
01:16:22,154 --> 01:16:24,423
Honey Bee, drop a ton of
bricks on this guy, all right?
1536
01:16:24,556 --> 01:16:26,359
Tell him to leave you alone.
1537
01:16:27,293 --> 01:16:28,494
I don't want to give you
a chance.
1538
01:16:28,627 --> 01:16:30,562
Leave me alone.
1539
01:16:30,695 --> 01:16:33,164
- Just leave her alone, man.
- Yeah, leave me alone.
1540
01:16:33,298 --> 01:16:34,600
We're gonna see
each other again.
1541
01:16:34,732 --> 01:16:36,034
Oh, my God.
1542
01:16:36,168 --> 01:16:38,004
I know you know it.
I know you feel it.
1543
01:16:38,137 --> 01:16:39,471
I see it in your eyes.
1544
01:16:39,605 --> 01:16:41,874
There's nothing
for you in my eyes, okay?
1545
01:16:42,007 --> 01:16:43,442
Yeah, yeah.
1546
01:16:43,575 --> 01:16:45,311
You were my boss, okay?
And I had to fucking leave
1547
01:16:45,444 --> 01:16:47,646
my job because of you,
and that's not nice.
1548
01:16:47,779 --> 01:16:48,880
I loved my job.
1549
01:16:49,014 --> 01:16:50,982
Oh, I hate guys like this!
1550
01:16:51,115 --> 01:16:52,884
I want to punch you
in the fucking dick!
1551
01:16:53,017 --> 01:16:54,386
- We were working together.
- I'm not nice?
1552
01:16:54,520 --> 01:16:57,321
- No, you're not nice.
- You're not nice!
1553
01:16:57,455 --> 01:16:58,990
You blew it
right here, right now.
1554
01:16:59,124 --> 01:17:00,693
You think you're so special?
1555
01:17:00,825 --> 01:17:02,261
I would have done anything
for you,
1556
01:17:02,395 --> 01:17:04,964
and you're gonna blow it
for some fucking asshole?
1557
01:17:05,097 --> 01:17:06,432
He's gonna leave you,
1558
01:17:06,566 --> 01:17:10,136
and then you're gonna come
looking for me.
1559
01:17:10,901 --> 01:17:12,237
Okay, Michael, come.
1560
01:17:12,370 --> 01:17:14,005
- He's gonna leave you!
- Michael!
1561
01:17:14,139 --> 01:17:16,508
And then you're
gonna come looking for me!
1562
01:17:30,222 --> 01:17:32,291
Jesus.
1563
01:17:36,061 --> 01:17:37,830
You know, you don't
have to live with that dickhead
1564
01:17:37,963 --> 01:17:38,998
just showing up
at your apartment
1565
01:17:39,130 --> 01:17:40,700
whenever he feels like it,
right?
1566
01:17:40,833 --> 01:17:42,602
Easy to say.
What's your solution?
1567
01:17:42,735 --> 01:17:44,637
Ah, I don't know.
1568
01:17:44,770 --> 01:17:46,739
Maybe those people
they call cops?
1569
01:17:46,871 --> 01:17:49,240
Oh, yeah?
And what do I say?
1570
01:17:49,374 --> 01:17:51,276
He hasn't hurt me
or threatened me, really.
1571
01:17:51,410 --> 01:17:53,245
You know?
1572
01:17:53,379 --> 01:17:55,948
How about you have
a friend talk to him?
1573
01:17:56,080 --> 01:17:57,415
You guys have
any mutual friends?
1574
01:17:57,549 --> 01:17:59,817
Well, does he seem like
he has friends to you?
1575
01:17:59,951 --> 01:18:02,487
Okay, well.
1576
01:18:02,620 --> 01:18:03,855
I can put a scare into him.
1577
01:18:03,990 --> 01:18:05,258
Oh, yeah?
And what are you gonna do?
1578
01:18:05,391 --> 01:18:07,659
Like, whisper spooky things
in his ear?
1579
01:18:07,793 --> 01:18:09,495
Okay, you know.
It's worth a try.
1580
01:18:09,629 --> 01:18:10,663
You know, it worked on you.
1581
01:18:10,795 --> 01:18:12,798
Come on, we've got
to do something.
1582
01:18:12,931 --> 01:18:14,700
Trust me, I've been
pretty blunt.
1583
01:18:14,833 --> 01:18:15,868
I know you think
you're being blunt,
1584
01:18:16,000 --> 01:18:17,369
but guys like that...
1585
01:18:17,503 --> 01:18:20,539
they need a freight train
right between the eyes.
1586
01:18:20,672 --> 01:18:24,576
I mean, guys like that
are thick as bricks.
1587
01:18:30,048 --> 01:18:32,952
Wait, are...
1588
01:18:37,289 --> 01:18:39,491
Do you really want him
to leave you alone?
1589
01:18:39,624 --> 01:18:40,958
What?
1590
01:18:41,093 --> 01:18:44,196
Some people like
that unhealthy attention.
1591
01:18:44,329 --> 01:18:46,932
You know?
Maybe you're preserving
1592
01:18:47,065 --> 01:18:48,834
some illusion for him.
1593
01:18:48,968 --> 01:18:50,402
What are you trying to say?
1594
01:18:50,535 --> 01:18:53,504
Are you trying to say
that I actually like him...
1595
01:18:53,638 --> 01:18:56,208
No, I don't want
to assume anything.
1596
01:18:56,342 --> 01:18:57,844
Maybe you have
feelings for him.
1597
01:18:57,977 --> 01:18:58,911
Maybe you don't want
to hurt my feelings.
1598
01:19:00,847 --> 01:19:01,813
Because I feel
something for him?
1599
01:19:01,946 --> 01:19:03,915
It could happen.
1600
01:19:04,048 --> 01:19:05,984
Yeah.
1601
01:19:06,884 --> 01:19:09,088
Are you jealous?
1602
01:19:11,022 --> 01:19:14,993
I think you're jealous.
You're jealous.
1603
01:19:26,438 --> 01:19:28,306
I'm sorry.
1604
01:19:28,440 --> 01:19:29,540
Yeah.
1605
01:19:29,673 --> 01:19:32,078
That just sounded
way better in my head.
1606
01:19:34,980 --> 01:19:37,049
Apologize again.
1607
01:19:37,182 --> 01:19:39,751
Say sorry again.
1608
01:19:39,884 --> 01:19:41,987
Sorry.
1609
01:19:44,322 --> 01:19:46,892
Sorry.
1610
01:19:48,860 --> 01:19:51,063
I'm sorry.
1611
01:20:45,284 --> 01:20:48,219
Want to see my room?
1612
01:20:50,422 --> 01:20:52,391
Sure.
1613
01:21:18,115 --> 01:21:20,719
I would love to
make you dinner.
1614
01:21:22,120 --> 01:21:24,556
I'd love to eat it
if I could.
1615
01:21:25,657 --> 01:21:26,958
You know, you can eat
in front of me.
1616
01:21:27,092 --> 01:21:27,959
I don't mind.
1617
01:21:28,093 --> 01:21:30,095
It's okay.
1618
01:21:30,227 --> 01:21:32,096
You must be hungry.
1619
01:21:32,231 --> 01:21:34,065
I'm fine.
1620
01:21:37,870 --> 01:21:41,007
They say the universe shrinks
down to the size of two people
1621
01:21:41,139 --> 01:21:43,540
when they make love
for the first time.
1622
01:21:43,674 --> 01:21:45,444
Where'd you hear that?
Who says that?
1623
01:21:45,576 --> 01:21:48,280
Well, the entire universe
says it.
1624
01:21:49,914 --> 01:21:53,317
It holds its breath
to see what happens.
1625
01:21:54,218 --> 01:21:59,757
- What happens?
- New life or tragedy.
1626
01:22:00,758 --> 01:22:04,462
I don't think the universe
knows what tragedy is.
1627
01:22:05,263 --> 01:22:07,465
I mean, it laughs
and stares blankly
1628
01:22:07,598 --> 01:22:11,436
as a million tragedies
happen every second.
1629
01:22:11,570 --> 01:22:14,906
Galaxies collide without anyone
ever blinking, sorry.
1630
01:22:15,039 --> 01:22:18,610
I think you're wrong.
You can feel it when happens.
1631
01:22:21,847 --> 01:22:26,518
It holds its breath while fate
decides what happens next.
1632
01:22:26,651 --> 01:22:30,020
I think that's
what an orgasm is.
1633
01:22:30,155 --> 01:22:32,057
You must have weird orgasms.
1634
01:22:32,190 --> 01:22:35,026
Well at least I have orgasms.
1635
01:22:35,160 --> 01:22:36,695
Good point.
1636
01:22:43,002 --> 01:22:44,703
I'm sorry we can't even touch.
1637
01:22:44,835 --> 01:22:48,173
Well, maybe yearning is
way hotter than having it
1638
01:22:48,306 --> 01:22:49,875
whenever you want it.
1639
01:22:50,008 --> 01:22:53,011
Okay, now who told you that?
Because that is so not true.
1640
01:22:53,145 --> 01:22:55,414
Well, maybe it's true to me.
1641
01:23:00,518 --> 01:23:03,454
And you don't want to be
with someone
1642
01:23:03,588 --> 01:23:07,226
who you can make love with
someday?
1643
01:23:09,828 --> 01:23:12,464
I'm happy with you.
1644
01:23:15,200 --> 01:23:17,736
What we're doing is crazy.
1645
01:23:17,870 --> 01:23:20,239
I'm about the most fucked-up
guy you could bet on,
1646
01:23:20,371 --> 01:23:22,607
and life with me
just doesn't make any sense.
1647
01:23:22,740 --> 01:23:25,142
I know.
1648
01:23:25,276 --> 01:23:26,944
You're a ghost,
you're an alcoholic,
1649
01:23:27,079 --> 01:23:28,847
and you've got bad jokes.
1650
01:23:28,980 --> 01:23:31,282
And yet here I am.
1651
01:23:34,352 --> 01:23:36,721
Here you are.
1652
01:24:44,155 --> 01:24:45,656
I just saw my parents.
1653
01:24:45,790 --> 01:24:52,563
They were taking my clothes
out of my apartment here.
1654
01:24:52,697 --> 01:24:55,700
It was like watching a movie.
1655
01:24:55,834 --> 01:24:59,337
I wasn't there,
and they were talking about me.
1656
01:24:59,471 --> 01:25:02,708
But I could feel everything
that they felt.
1657
01:25:02,840 --> 01:25:04,308
But it just goes on.
1658
01:25:04,441 --> 01:25:07,245
I died, and everything
just goes on.
1659
01:25:08,512 --> 01:25:11,316
New York doesn't stop.
1660
01:25:12,785 --> 01:25:15,721
How about your parents?
Close?
1661
01:25:16,655 --> 01:25:18,991
I'm very close to my mom.
1662
01:25:56,794 --> 01:25:59,897
How is it you're dead and you
still have this apartment?
1663
01:26:00,031 --> 01:26:01,432
My family owns the building
1664
01:26:01,566 --> 01:26:04,469
and they're not too aggressive
about renting it just yet.
1665
01:26:04,602 --> 01:26:08,940
But also, fifth floor walk-up
is not the most popular item
1666
01:26:09,074 --> 01:26:11,210
and probably what
killed my out-of-shape ass,
1667
01:26:11,343 --> 01:26:13,379
come to think.
1668
01:26:20,953 --> 01:26:22,321
Where would you take a girl
on a date
1669
01:26:22,454 --> 01:26:24,556
if it was the last night
of your life?
1670
01:26:24,690 --> 01:26:26,692
For a long ride on my face.
1671
01:26:26,825 --> 01:26:29,527
No, no, I need you to be
serious for a minute.
1672
01:26:29,660 --> 01:26:32,864
I'm dead serious.
My face.
1673
01:26:34,031 --> 01:26:35,432
Or maybe Nobu.
1674
01:26:35,566 --> 01:26:36,868
Either one gets me laid.
1675
01:26:37,002 --> 01:26:40,505
All right.
You're not helping, okay?
1676
01:26:41,338 --> 01:26:43,674
I met this girl.
1677
01:26:43,807 --> 01:26:45,710
Yeah, and I really feel
like she's the one.
1678
01:26:45,843 --> 01:26:47,478
You know?
She's everything.
1679
01:26:47,612 --> 01:26:53,017
She's this beautiful,
amazing, rare creature, and...
1680
01:26:53,151 --> 01:26:55,287
I don't even know
why we haven't been whisked up
1681
01:26:55,419 --> 01:26:57,221
into the sky,
or whatever happens.
1682
01:26:57,356 --> 01:27:00,392
I mean, I think
she feels it for me too.
1683
01:27:01,392 --> 01:27:03,794
Well, it means
it's not true love,
1684
01:27:03,928 --> 01:27:07,499
at least for one of you.
One of you is not feeling love.
1685
01:27:07,632 --> 01:27:10,669
If you really were
a match made in...
1686
01:27:10,802 --> 01:27:12,137
you know what I mean,
1687
01:27:12,271 --> 01:27:15,407
then you'd both be gone.
Whoosh.
1688
01:27:15,539 --> 01:27:19,377
For some reason,
you don't match the criteria.
1689
01:27:19,511 --> 01:27:21,813
I mean, whatever that is.
1690
01:27:21,946 --> 01:27:23,347
No, no, no.
1691
01:27:23,481 --> 01:27:26,818
If we both feel it...
I mean, alive or not,
1692
01:27:26,951 --> 01:27:29,353
isn't that it?
I mean, who's to say?
1693
01:27:29,486 --> 01:27:32,456
Not me or you.
That much we know.
1694
01:27:32,589 --> 01:27:34,491
Now, I've made
an entire lifetime
1695
01:27:34,625 --> 01:27:35,959
full of mistakes,
1696
01:27:36,093 --> 01:27:39,431
and this does not feel like
one of them, all right?
1697
01:27:39,563 --> 01:27:41,299
What about you, huh?
1698
01:27:41,432 --> 01:27:42,766
Don't you care
about your future?
1699
01:27:42,901 --> 01:27:45,971
I mean, you literally have
nothing to lose by trying.
1700
01:27:46,103 --> 01:27:48,807
You're just gonna give up
by accepting fate?
1701
01:27:50,075 --> 01:27:54,545
Bro, you're asking me
about the mysteries of life
1702
01:27:54,678 --> 01:27:56,614
and I got a GED.
1703
01:27:56,748 --> 01:27:58,016
I'm just looking
to wait it all out
1704
01:27:58,150 --> 01:28:00,018
here in the comfort
of my own room
1705
01:28:00,151 --> 01:28:03,621
with my two best pals,
Bud and Jack.
1706
01:28:03,754 --> 01:28:05,956
I mean, what's the point?
1707
01:28:06,090 --> 01:28:08,093
I'm sick of playing
the musical chairs game
1708
01:28:08,226 --> 01:28:11,597
that never gives me a chair.
Why should I play?
1709
01:28:11,730 --> 01:28:14,700
I've been alone till now,
so what's the difference?
1710
01:28:14,833 --> 01:28:16,601
Well, now you'll cease
to exist
1711
01:28:16,734 --> 01:28:18,203
if you don't meet someone.
1712
01:28:18,335 --> 01:28:20,271
Well, that was always true,
if you think about it.
1713
01:28:20,405 --> 01:28:22,072
How's this different?
1714
01:28:22,206 --> 01:28:25,744
I mean, now it's for sure.
Before, we all just assumed it.
1715
01:28:25,877 --> 01:28:29,914
Well, now you just have
so much more to gain.
1716
01:28:30,048 --> 01:28:31,483
Like what?
1717
01:28:31,615 --> 01:28:33,584
Like the rest
of your existence.
1718
01:28:33,718 --> 01:28:35,887
Eternity.
Whatever that may be.
1719
01:28:36,021 --> 01:28:38,023
What, I'm suddenly going
to do better?
1720
01:28:39,156 --> 01:28:40,725
I don't get women,
1721
01:28:40,859 --> 01:28:42,627
in every sense
of the word "get."
1722
01:28:42,761 --> 01:28:44,396
I never have.
1723
01:28:44,530 --> 01:28:45,697
What do you mean?
Since when?
1724
01:28:45,830 --> 01:28:48,600
- You had plenty of girls.
- Since ever.
1725
01:28:49,267 --> 01:28:50,635
What, are you kidding?
1726
01:28:50,768 --> 01:28:52,070
Those were whores,
1727
01:28:52,203 --> 01:28:54,473
neighborhood chicks
who would suck your balls dry
1728
01:28:54,606 --> 01:28:57,342
for a meal anywhere
with real cloth napkins.
1729
01:28:57,476 --> 01:28:59,177
No, I fucked chicks.
Don't get me wrong.
1730
01:28:59,311 --> 01:29:00,779
I'm not a virgin.
1731
01:29:00,911 --> 01:29:04,583
I've just stayed out
of entanglements all along.
1732
01:29:04,715 --> 01:29:07,919
And now I'm not getting
any younger or older either.
1733
01:29:08,052 --> 01:29:09,987
And I'm gonna cease to exist
any fucking minute.
1734
01:29:10,120 --> 01:29:13,458
I mean, you know, what girl
wants to deal with that?
1735
01:29:13,590 --> 01:29:15,160
Nothing like the smell
of desperation
1736
01:29:15,293 --> 01:29:18,396
to dry up the old banana hole.
You know what I mean?
1737
01:29:18,529 --> 01:29:20,632
You're a poet.
1738
01:29:21,333 --> 01:29:22,634
I mean, I'm in no hurry,
1739
01:29:22,767 --> 01:29:25,369
but I'm not gonna hold on
with both hands
1740
01:29:25,504 --> 01:29:27,338
when that cold hand grips me.
1741
01:29:27,472 --> 01:29:32,177
Nope, can't scare me much
if you already killed me once.
1742
01:29:37,481 --> 01:29:40,685
No, she seems to love me.
1743
01:29:40,819 --> 01:29:42,286
I'm crazy about her.
1744
01:29:42,419 --> 01:29:43,922
And if that's not enough,
I'm gonna make it enough.
1745
01:29:44,054 --> 01:29:45,557
All right? Fuck them.
Who are they to say?
1746
01:29:45,691 --> 01:29:47,292
You tell them, chief.
Go get 'em.
1747
01:29:47,424 --> 01:29:49,593
And do... I don't know.
Whatever you kids do.
1748
01:29:49,727 --> 01:29:51,228
I'm just hoping
on my next go-around,
1749
01:29:51,362 --> 01:29:53,932
I come back
as a huge handsome dildo.
1750
01:29:54,066 --> 01:29:55,867
I know you will, my friend.
1751
01:29:56,000 --> 01:29:58,436
Just be aware that she might
be sending you mixed signals.
1752
01:29:58,569 --> 01:30:02,673
I mean, for whatever reason,
universe isn't buying it yet.
1753
01:30:02,807 --> 01:30:04,343
Well, how am I
supposed to win?
1754
01:30:04,476 --> 01:30:06,511
Oh, bro.
1755
01:30:06,643 --> 01:30:08,413
Are you still trying to win?
1756
01:30:08,547 --> 01:30:13,017
Don't you know that women
are the Kobayashi Maru test?
1757
01:30:13,151 --> 01:30:14,018
Pardon me?
1758
01:30:14,151 --> 01:30:15,953
Didn't you see
"Star Trek II"?
1759
01:30:16,088 --> 01:30:17,789
Yeah, but I don't know what
the fuck you're talking about.
1760
01:30:17,923 --> 01:30:19,291
You remember the beginning?
1761
01:30:19,423 --> 01:30:21,424
It's not meant to be something
you can win.
1762
01:30:21,558 --> 01:30:24,027
It's a test of character.
1763
01:30:24,161 --> 01:30:25,329
What?
1764
01:30:25,463 --> 01:30:27,865
Relationships are
the "Kobayashi Maru" test
1765
01:30:27,999 --> 01:30:29,032
in life.
1766
01:30:29,167 --> 01:30:30,401
You can't win.
1767
01:30:30,535 --> 01:30:33,771
You can't keep from losing.
Nobody expects you to.
1768
01:30:33,905 --> 01:30:36,975
It's just a measure
of your character.
1769
01:31:05,803 --> 01:31:08,106
Meet this guy.
1770
01:31:11,677 --> 01:31:14,446
So, Michael,
this is my friend Faith.
1771
01:31:14,579 --> 01:31:18,616
and Faith, this is my newly
deceased friend Michael.
1772
01:31:19,784 --> 01:31:23,121
Wait...
Come again?
1773
01:31:24,489 --> 01:31:26,525
Honey Bee, you know
she can't see me.
1774
01:31:26,657 --> 01:31:27,859
So what?
1775
01:31:27,991 --> 01:31:29,494
I just wanted you
to meet my friend.
1776
01:31:29,628 --> 01:31:31,128
I am missing
Pilates for this?
1777
01:31:31,262 --> 01:31:32,630
She's just gonna think
you're losing it.
1778
01:31:32,763 --> 01:31:34,331
I'm not losing it.
1779
01:31:34,464 --> 01:31:36,667
I am pretty sure that you
are, in fact, losing it, Bee.
1780
01:31:36,801 --> 01:31:38,370
See?
1781
01:31:38,503 --> 01:31:40,272
I mean, how is she gonna
believe that I'm really here?
1782
01:31:40,405 --> 01:31:41,472
Just do something.
1783
01:31:41,606 --> 01:31:43,107
- Do something?
- Yeah, come on.
1784
01:31:43,240 --> 01:31:45,575
Do something, show her
that I'm not batshit crazy.
1785
01:31:45,709 --> 01:31:47,511
Oh, okay.
1786
01:31:47,646 --> 01:31:49,481
- Okay, so...
- Margaritas?
1787
01:31:49,614 --> 01:31:50,982
Oh, thank God.
1788
01:31:51,115 --> 01:31:54,052
I ordered margaritas.
I think you should have one.
1789
01:31:54,185 --> 01:31:55,620
Thank you.
1790
01:31:59,089 --> 01:32:01,191
See?
1791
01:32:01,959 --> 01:32:03,461
I can't believe
I just did that.
1792
01:32:06,297 --> 01:32:08,499
So, huh?
1793
01:32:12,102 --> 01:32:13,938
- I need a cigarette.
- Now you believe me.
1794
01:32:14,071 --> 01:32:15,172
Mm.
1795
01:32:15,306 --> 01:32:17,843
What are you doing?
You can't smoke here.
1796
01:32:19,410 --> 01:32:20,844
Don't worry, it's fine.
1797
01:32:20,978 --> 01:32:22,179
Cheers.
1798
01:32:22,312 --> 01:32:23,480
Yeah, I know.
1799
01:32:23,614 --> 01:32:24,949
Don't worry about it.
1800
01:32:25,083 --> 01:32:27,085
And I know the guy
who owns this place, so...
1801
01:32:31,222 --> 01:32:33,859
Did you just drink
my margarita?
1802
01:32:36,393 --> 01:32:38,329
He did.
1803
01:32:39,864 --> 01:32:41,098
- Okay.
- Yeah?
1804
01:32:41,232 --> 01:32:42,266
- What the fuck?
- Now you believe me.
1805
01:32:42,400 --> 01:32:43,768
That is a good trick,
1806
01:32:43,901 --> 01:32:46,637
but this means now I have
to order another one
1807
01:32:46,771 --> 01:32:48,806
and drink yours.
Two more margs, please.
1808
01:32:48,940 --> 01:32:50,808
- Oh, that sounds good.
- So, am I crazy?
1809
01:32:50,941 --> 01:32:52,743
Yes, sure, fine.
I believe you.
1810
01:32:52,878 --> 01:32:54,079
- But can you please tell...
- Thank you.
1811
01:32:54,212 --> 01:32:55,647
That guy to stay away
from my alcohol?
1812
01:32:55,780 --> 01:32:57,382
Please stay away
from her drinks.
1813
01:32:57,514 --> 01:32:58,682
Okay, fine.
Okay.
1814
01:32:58,816 --> 01:33:00,084
So, tell me
about yourself, Faith.
1815
01:33:00,218 --> 01:33:02,420
He wants to know
about yourself.
1816
01:33:02,553 --> 01:33:04,020
What does he look like?
1817
01:33:04,155 --> 01:33:08,092
- Oh, he has blue eyes.
- Green.
1818
01:33:08,226 --> 01:33:10,262
Green.
He has brown hair.
1819
01:33:10,395 --> 01:33:13,999
And he's around...
how old are you?
1820
01:33:14,132 --> 01:33:17,701
- 40s, but I play 30s.
- He looks, yeah.
1821
01:33:17,834 --> 01:33:19,737
- Okay?
- Really, you play 30?
1822
01:33:19,870 --> 01:33:22,039
- Sometimes.
- Calm down.
1823
01:33:22,173 --> 01:33:23,541
Okay, so...
1824
01:33:23,674 --> 01:33:25,677
what does he do?
What...
1825
01:33:25,811 --> 01:33:27,078
What did he do,
because he's dead.
1826
01:33:27,212 --> 01:33:28,346
Dead, he is deceased.
That's right.
1827
01:33:28,480 --> 01:33:30,181
Oh, I totally forgot
about that.
1828
01:33:30,315 --> 01:33:31,549
- Yeah, I'm dead.
- He doesn't have a job.
1829
01:33:31,682 --> 01:33:32,749
Yeah, yeah.
1830
01:33:32,883 --> 01:33:34,886
Yeah, what do I do?
not a whole lot.
1831
01:33:35,018 --> 01:33:37,355
I'm fucking dead, so I'm
an extremely out-of-work actor.
1832
01:33:37,487 --> 01:33:40,258
- He's an actor.
- Have I seen him in anything?
1833
01:33:40,391 --> 01:33:43,294
- Actors hate that question.
- Where can we see you?
1834
01:33:43,428 --> 01:33:45,897
I was a promising
older, younger actor.
1835
01:33:46,030 --> 01:33:48,265
I did a lot of small roles.
1836
01:33:48,400 --> 01:33:50,801
I did a pilot
that never went anywhere.
1837
01:33:50,935 --> 01:33:52,036
I did a lot of theater...
1838
01:33:52,169 --> 01:33:53,337
So, he's still
talking right now?
1839
01:33:53,471 --> 01:33:54,839
And I had
a really well-reviewed
1840
01:33:54,972 --> 01:33:57,274
one-man show
that was in previews.
1841
01:33:57,407 --> 01:33:58,575
No.
1842
01:33:58,709 --> 01:34:00,277
No?
1843
01:34:00,410 --> 01:34:04,381
So, dead, out-of-work actor
who hasn't been in anything.
1844
01:34:04,516 --> 01:34:09,219
Promising, out-of-work,
dead actor.
1845
01:34:09,353 --> 01:34:12,123
Does he have any single dead
brothers that I can date?
1846
01:34:12,257 --> 01:34:14,058
Do you have any single
dead brothers?
1847
01:34:14,191 --> 01:34:16,328
She's funny.
I like her.
1848
01:34:16,460 --> 01:34:18,763
Thank you very much.
1849
01:34:19,696 --> 01:34:21,465
Oh, God.
1850
01:34:21,598 --> 01:34:22,667
Wait a minute.
1851
01:34:22,801 --> 01:34:24,669
Well, you are
a special actor.
1852
01:34:24,802 --> 01:34:27,371
Honey Bee.
1853
01:34:27,504 --> 01:34:29,240
I've got to go.
1854
01:34:31,776 --> 01:34:34,578
So, he's nice, right?
1855
01:34:34,712 --> 01:34:36,114
I'm worried about you.
1856
01:34:36,246 --> 01:34:38,282
The whole thing just makes me
a little uncomfortable.
1857
01:34:38,415 --> 01:34:40,083
We're not
ripping him off, Craig.
1858
01:34:40,218 --> 01:34:41,619
It's honoring his memory.
1859
01:34:41,752 --> 01:34:43,187
It won't be his show,
1860
01:34:43,320 --> 01:34:47,924
it'll be your show,
presented by me in his memory.
1861
01:34:48,058 --> 01:34:50,695
This fucking guy, Jay?
1862
01:34:50,829 --> 01:34:53,031
You gave my show
to this fucking guy?
1863
01:34:53,164 --> 01:34:54,699
- It's like we're honoring him.
- Howdy fucking Doody?
1864
01:34:54,831 --> 01:34:55,799
- It needs work.
- God dammit!
1865
01:34:55,933 --> 01:34:57,201
I thought we were friends!
1866
01:34:57,334 --> 01:34:59,136
I want to change
some lines, of course.
1867
01:34:59,270 --> 01:35:01,172
I gonna make some changes
to your fucking head, you fuck.
1868
01:35:01,306 --> 01:35:03,241
I think I could fix it up
a little bit, though.
1869
01:35:03,374 --> 01:35:05,876
I want to skull fuck
your fucking ear, you dick.
1870
01:35:06,009 --> 01:35:07,378
I know you can.
1871
01:35:07,512 --> 01:35:10,514
Get out!
1872
01:35:10,647 --> 01:35:12,817
Maybe the ending too.
1873
01:35:13,884 --> 01:35:18,422
Shit, okay.
You fucking heard me.
1874
01:35:18,556 --> 01:35:22,259
Get the fuck out!
1875
01:35:27,999 --> 01:35:30,868
- Out!
- You know what?
1876
01:35:31,002 --> 01:35:31,937
Give me a second here
if you can.
1877
01:35:32,070 --> 01:35:34,039
I'm just...
1878
01:35:35,507 --> 01:35:36,773
Ha, ha, ha!
1879
01:35:36,907 --> 01:35:38,476
Ha!
1880
01:35:43,813 --> 01:35:46,450
Fuck you, Jay!
1881
01:35:48,652 --> 01:35:51,289
Cheers, motherfuckers.
1882
01:35:54,557 --> 01:35:56,893
Where'd she go?
1883
01:35:57,026 --> 01:35:58,730
You scared her.
1884
01:35:58,862 --> 01:36:01,164
I have that effect.
1885
01:36:01,298 --> 01:36:02,667
Well, that went well.
1886
01:36:02,801 --> 01:36:04,735
Yeah, I thought so.
1887
01:36:04,869 --> 01:36:06,737
She's great.
1888
01:36:06,870 --> 01:36:08,605
She is.
1889
01:36:08,740 --> 01:36:11,910
A pain in the ass.
1890
01:36:14,145 --> 01:36:16,748
Why are you looking
at me like that?
1891
01:36:16,880 --> 01:36:18,115
You okay?
What's wrong?
1892
01:36:18,249 --> 01:36:20,418
I've got to go.
1893
01:36:25,190 --> 01:36:26,956
Scarlett?
Jah!
1894
01:36:27,090 --> 01:36:28,759
You look like
you've seen a ghost.
1895
01:36:28,892 --> 01:36:30,761
All right.
What does it mean
1896
01:36:30,895 --> 01:36:32,496
if someone alive
fades in and out?
1897
01:36:32,629 --> 01:36:33,864
What do you mean?
1898
01:36:33,998 --> 01:36:35,333
Well, I found a girl.
All right?
1899
01:36:35,467 --> 01:36:36,968
And I've got to tell you,
I really feel it,
1900
01:36:37,101 --> 01:36:41,239
but there's no "whoosh."
There's no big... thing.
1901
01:36:41,371 --> 01:36:43,907
But she can see me,
and she can hear me.
1902
01:36:44,040 --> 01:36:46,509
But she fades in and out
every now and again.
1903
01:36:46,643 --> 01:36:49,847
She's alive, but she shimmers
like a dead person.
1904
01:36:49,981 --> 01:36:51,816
I mean, what does that mean?
1905
01:36:51,949 --> 01:36:53,951
It means she's going
to die soon,
1906
01:36:54,084 --> 01:36:55,352
very soon.
1907
01:36:55,486 --> 01:36:57,088
Normally, it's not possible
to bond with someone
1908
01:36:57,221 --> 01:37:00,023
who's on the other side
of the line, but she's close,
1909
01:37:00,157 --> 01:37:01,325
very close.
1910
01:37:01,459 --> 01:37:03,193
What?
How's that supposed to be?
1911
01:37:03,326 --> 01:37:04,661
Might be good news for you.
1912
01:37:04,795 --> 01:37:08,465
That she's gonna die?
No, I can't let her die.
1913
01:37:08,600 --> 01:37:10,834
But death isn't the end.
You know that.
1914
01:37:10,968 --> 01:37:12,569
It's how you met her
in the first place.
1915
01:37:12,703 --> 01:37:15,572
She's close to the edge,
so she can glimpse over.
1916
01:37:15,706 --> 01:37:17,540
So I have to let
something terrible happen
1917
01:37:17,674 --> 01:37:19,209
to a healthy young woman
1918
01:37:19,343 --> 01:37:21,178
so I can hope that it means
we work out for each other?
1919
01:37:21,312 --> 01:37:24,215
I mean, she's young.
She still has her whole life.
1920
01:37:24,347 --> 01:37:27,817
But maybe she's supposed to
follow you to the other side.
1921
01:37:28,652 --> 01:37:31,690
Or maybe not.
It's really not up to us, so...
1922
01:37:31,822 --> 01:37:33,223
So, I have to find
a soul mate,
1923
01:37:33,356 --> 01:37:35,092
and you're telling me
it's all fate and destiny
1924
01:37:35,226 --> 01:37:37,695
and free will and magic
and all that bullshit,
1925
01:37:37,829 --> 01:37:40,298
but you're saying we can't
do anything about this?
1926
01:37:40,432 --> 01:37:41,633
That's a stupid answer.
1927
01:37:41,766 --> 01:37:44,102
Well, it is the answer.
1928
01:37:45,335 --> 01:37:46,570
Is there anyone
in the afterlife
1929
01:37:46,704 --> 01:37:48,572
who's good at their job?
1930
01:37:56,045 --> 01:37:57,647
There you are.
1931
01:38:01,919 --> 01:38:03,220
Pick up.
1932
01:38:03,353 --> 01:38:04,722
Hi, you've reached Honey
Bee.
1933
01:38:04,855 --> 01:38:06,156
- I can't come to the phone.
- Ugh! Pick up.
1934
01:38:06,290 --> 01:38:07,824
Leave a message, bye.
1935
01:38:07,959 --> 01:38:09,327
Oh, hi, Honey Bee.
1936
01:38:09,459 --> 01:38:12,896
I was trying to reach you,
been trying all day.
1937
01:38:13,030 --> 01:38:14,897
I know you asked me
not to call.
1938
01:38:15,031 --> 01:38:16,301
So I thought I'd just call?
1939
01:38:16,433 --> 01:38:19,869
So maybe you could
call me back, you know?
1940
01:38:20,004 --> 01:38:22,706
I mean, if you don't mind.
1941
01:38:22,839 --> 01:38:24,909
I know you know my number.
1942
01:38:25,043 --> 01:38:26,811
Au revoir.
1943
01:38:26,945 --> 01:38:30,215
God, you are such
a douchebag!
1944
01:38:30,347 --> 01:38:33,650
Where are you going now,
you fucking dipshit?
1945
01:38:50,935 --> 01:38:53,538
I wish I could fart right now.
1946
01:38:58,410 --> 01:39:00,412
Fuck.
1947
01:39:13,223 --> 01:39:14,525
Hello.
1948
01:39:14,657 --> 01:39:17,661
Patrick?
Dammit, I told you that...
1949
01:39:20,999 --> 01:39:23,032
Oh, my God.
1950
01:39:23,167 --> 01:39:25,069
What the fuck!
1951
01:39:25,203 --> 01:39:26,904
Why the fuck did you do that?
1952
01:39:27,036 --> 01:39:28,705
Who the hell was that?
1953
01:39:28,838 --> 01:39:30,140
Is anybody here?
1954
01:39:30,273 --> 01:39:32,276
Help!
1955
01:40:00,370 --> 01:40:03,575
No.
No.
1956
01:40:20,190 --> 01:40:22,726
Bro!
I got the most amazing news.
1957
01:40:22,860 --> 01:40:23,962
What?
1958
01:40:24,094 --> 01:40:25,795
I met someone.
I wasn't even looking.
1959
01:40:25,929 --> 01:40:28,798
I was actively not looking.
I was avoiding, in fact.
1960
01:40:28,932 --> 01:40:31,435
I'm hanging out in the
bathroom, watching ladies pee.
1961
01:40:31,569 --> 01:40:33,704
Next thing I know, I meet
the most amazing dead girl.
1962
01:40:33,838 --> 01:40:34,938
Nice.
1963
01:40:35,071 --> 01:40:37,206
But she wasn't peeing.
She was just hanging out.
1964
01:40:37,340 --> 01:40:38,575
And I know what you thinking,
1965
01:40:38,709 --> 01:40:40,511
and but she's not a dyke
or anything, you know.
1966
01:40:40,643 --> 01:40:41,745
She was just catching
a moment alone,
1967
01:40:41,879 --> 01:40:43,148
and there I was.
1968
01:40:43,280 --> 01:40:44,581
That's great, Angelo!
I've got to go.
1969
01:40:44,714 --> 01:40:46,450
Wait, wait, wait.
Don't you get it, man?
1970
01:40:46,584 --> 01:40:49,020
It's real.
It's possible.
1971
01:40:49,154 --> 01:40:50,721
I mean,
the joke's not on us after all.
1972
01:40:50,855 --> 01:40:53,324
I thought I had no hope.
I thought there was no hope.
1973
01:40:53,456 --> 01:40:55,491
And then I turn around,
and there she is.
1974
01:40:55,625 --> 01:40:56,994
Hey, Angelo,
I'm proud of you, all right?
1975
01:40:57,128 --> 01:40:59,030
But I got something really
important I got to go do.
1976
01:40:59,163 --> 01:41:01,098
Yeah, yeah, listen.
Me too, man.
1977
01:41:01,231 --> 01:41:02,766
This means I get to go.
1978
01:41:02,900 --> 01:41:05,402
Look, I mean, nothing's
happened yet, but I think soon.
1979
01:41:05,535 --> 01:41:07,538
I got to meet her in
a few hours back at the can,
1980
01:41:07,670 --> 01:41:10,174
but I think something
good's gonna...
1981
01:41:11,240 --> 01:41:13,476
Oh, no, man.
1982
01:41:13,611 --> 01:41:16,748
- Angelo?
- Now?
1983
01:41:17,581 --> 01:41:19,917
- Oh, man.
- What is it?
1984
01:41:20,049 --> 01:41:21,985
No.
1985
01:41:22,119 --> 01:41:24,923
No, man.
No.
1986
01:41:25,856 --> 01:41:27,759
Angelo?
1987
01:41:28,692 --> 01:41:31,628
Oh, no.
1988
01:41:31,762 --> 01:41:33,731
Oh, God.
1989
01:41:42,706 --> 01:41:45,343
How do I know what to do?
1990
01:41:50,347 --> 01:41:52,282
Oh.
1991
01:41:53,250 --> 01:41:55,753
No.
No, not yet.
1992
01:42:04,395 --> 01:42:06,030
Hi.
1993
01:42:06,931 --> 01:42:08,732
Please, don't ever do that
to me again, okay?
1994
01:42:08,865 --> 01:42:09,999
Oh, God.
1995
01:42:10,133 --> 01:42:11,902
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
It's just me, okay?
1996
01:42:12,035 --> 01:42:13,870
I just need to talk to you.
1997
01:42:14,004 --> 01:42:15,505
I tried knocking, but...
1998
01:42:15,639 --> 01:42:18,776
It's okay.
Tell me.
1999
01:42:20,311 --> 01:42:21,879
I need you to go.
2000
01:42:22,012 --> 01:42:24,547
Yeah, I need you
to get out of town.
2001
01:42:24,681 --> 01:42:25,883
Something bad is
gonna happen,
2002
01:42:26,016 --> 01:42:27,417
and I just need you
to not be here.
2003
01:42:27,551 --> 01:42:29,253
What are you talking about?
2004
01:42:29,386 --> 01:42:30,654
Well, your life is in danger.
2005
01:42:30,788 --> 01:42:32,423
Just...
Can you just trust me?
2006
01:42:32,556 --> 01:42:35,058
I trust you, but if you don't
tell me what's going on,
2007
01:42:35,191 --> 01:42:36,592
how am I supposed to...
2008
01:42:36,727 --> 01:42:38,829
I need you to leave.
You can go.
2009
01:42:38,962 --> 01:42:40,031
I mean, this is all...
2010
01:42:40,164 --> 01:42:42,532
There's nothing here
that you need to hold on to.
2011
01:42:42,667 --> 01:42:43,767
I can't just pack up
and leave, I don't...
2012
01:42:43,901 --> 01:42:45,102
Yes, you can!
2013
01:42:45,235 --> 01:42:46,904
People always think that
they can't leave, but they can.
2014
01:42:47,038 --> 01:42:48,371
Okay?
Yeah.
2015
01:42:48,504 --> 01:42:49,873
All of this
is just stuff.
2016
01:42:50,007 --> 01:42:51,174
Your job is just work.
2017
01:42:51,308 --> 01:42:52,810
Okay?
I'm talking about your life.
2018
01:42:52,942 --> 01:42:55,245
- None of this is important!
- That's insulting.
2019
01:42:55,379 --> 01:42:57,280
I don't understand
what you're saying, I mean...
2020
01:42:57,414 --> 01:42:58,682
We just act like there's
a tornado,
2021
01:42:58,816 --> 01:43:00,518
and you don't want to be
that old lady
2022
01:43:00,651 --> 01:43:02,252
going back to her trailer
for a scrapbook and a parakeet.
2023
01:43:02,386 --> 01:43:03,286
Huh?
Come on, let's pack up and go.
2024
01:43:03,420 --> 01:43:04,722
Could you please tell me
2025
01:43:04,855 --> 01:43:06,257
- what's going on?
- Do you have a suitcase?
2026
01:43:06,389 --> 01:43:07,892
What could be
so fucking important?
2027
01:43:08,025 --> 01:43:09,326
Huh?
2028
01:43:09,459 --> 01:43:11,094
What is it?
Please leave.
2029
01:43:11,227 --> 01:43:12,730
No, I'm not leaving.
2030
01:43:12,864 --> 01:43:14,398
If you don't tell me what's
going on, I'm not leaving.
2031
01:43:14,531 --> 01:43:17,400
Agh!
Okay, how about this?
2032
01:43:17,534 --> 01:43:19,203
Let's flip a coin.
2033
01:43:19,335 --> 01:43:21,472
Heads, you do what I say.
2034
01:43:21,605 --> 01:43:23,173
Tails, you can stay here
as long as you want.
2035
01:43:23,307 --> 01:43:25,310
Okay?
That's fair, right?
2036
01:43:35,887 --> 01:43:37,554
Just go away.
2037
01:43:37,687 --> 01:43:40,523
Just go far away
and don't tell another soul,
2038
01:43:40,656 --> 01:43:42,825
for lack of a better word,
where you're going, okay?
2039
01:43:42,959 --> 01:43:46,096
Just go nowhere.
Any nowhere but here.
2040
01:43:46,230 --> 01:43:48,365
I'll take care of everything.
2041
01:43:48,499 --> 01:43:49,500
What are you gonna do?
2042
01:43:49,633 --> 01:43:51,202
You can barely move
a Dixie cup.
2043
01:43:51,334 --> 01:43:53,837
Just keep packing.
2044
01:43:54,504 --> 01:43:55,972
Don't worry, I'll find you.
2045
01:43:56,106 --> 01:43:57,675
I'll let you know when it's
safe to come back, okay?
2046
01:43:57,807 --> 01:43:59,976
I just need to keep going
and stay off your phone.
2047
01:44:00,111 --> 01:44:01,512
- Where are you gonna go?
- I don't know,
2048
01:44:01,645 --> 01:44:02,980
but I just got
to do something, okay?
2049
01:44:03,114 --> 01:44:05,115
Your life is more important
than you understand.
2050
01:44:05,249 --> 01:44:06,550
You can't understand it.
2051
01:44:06,683 --> 01:44:08,351
You're still alive.
2052
01:44:08,486 --> 01:44:11,689
What makes you so sure you
know more about life now?
2053
01:44:11,821 --> 01:44:15,191
Because... because
it's different now, okay?
2054
01:44:15,325 --> 01:44:17,428
I need to protect you.
2055
01:44:17,562 --> 01:44:21,065
I meet a girl,
and I can't just let her go.
2056
01:44:24,968 --> 01:44:26,870
Any girl?
2057
01:44:32,508 --> 01:44:34,111
I've got to go.
2058
01:44:34,245 --> 01:44:36,214
You've got to go.
Okay?
2059
01:44:36,347 --> 01:44:38,816
I'll fix everything!
2060
01:44:41,084 --> 01:44:43,286
Where am I going?
2061
01:44:43,420 --> 01:44:46,222
Just go!
Anywhere!
2062
01:45:20,723 --> 01:45:23,393
I have always loved you.
2063
01:45:23,527 --> 01:45:28,731
I will never love anyone
like I love you.
2064
01:45:28,865 --> 01:45:33,603
And no one will ever love you
like I love you now.
2065
01:45:43,513 --> 01:45:47,217
Now the end has finally come.
2066
01:45:48,785 --> 01:45:52,190
And now we ride off
into the sun.
2067
01:46:30,695 --> 01:46:32,163
Hi, you've reached
Honey Bee.
2068
01:46:32,295 --> 01:46:35,766
I can't talk
on the phone right now.
2069
01:46:35,900 --> 01:46:37,802
Taxi!
2070
01:46:39,369 --> 01:46:41,405
Hi, you've reached...
2071
01:46:53,383 --> 01:46:55,853
Listen, Michael said I had
to leave town.
2072
01:46:55,986 --> 01:46:57,622
- I'm not gonna be...
- No, are you crazy?
2073
01:46:57,754 --> 01:46:59,188
You can't leave town right now.
2074
01:46:59,322 --> 01:47:01,592
What, for someone
you barely can even see?
2075
01:47:01,725 --> 01:47:02,859
- I don't know.
- What is your imaginary pal
2076
01:47:02,993 --> 01:47:04,495
gonna tell you to do next?
2077
01:47:04,629 --> 01:47:06,030
You're usually
a very rational person.
2078
01:47:06,163 --> 01:47:07,964
Well, have you ever known me
to be irrational?
2079
01:47:08,097 --> 01:47:09,832
Most of the time,
yes, you are, but...
2080
01:47:09,967 --> 01:47:11,802
Well, doesn't that tell you
that I've seen some shit?
2081
01:47:11,935 --> 01:47:14,004
Or you think that
you've seen some shit.
2082
01:47:14,137 --> 01:47:16,907
Okay, I'll call you back.
Bye.
2083
01:47:18,909 --> 01:47:21,712
Scarlett.
Scarlett!
2084
01:47:25,615 --> 01:47:27,116
You can't do this, Michael.
2085
01:47:27,250 --> 01:47:29,419
This isn't gonna work out
for you the way you want it to.
2086
01:47:29,553 --> 01:47:30,821
If you're not
gonna help me,
2087
01:47:30,954 --> 01:47:32,489
then at least just stay
out of my way, okay?
2088
01:47:32,623 --> 01:47:34,558
You can't change destiny.
2089
01:47:34,691 --> 01:47:37,627
Frankly, Scarlett,
I don't give a fuck.
2090
01:47:41,597 --> 01:47:42,966
We need to talk, Michael.
2091
01:47:43,100 --> 01:47:46,870
No, you need to talk.
I need to run.
2092
01:48:26,177 --> 01:48:29,146
Honey Bee!
Honey Bee!
2093
01:48:29,280 --> 01:48:31,848
Wait, wait!
2094
01:48:31,981 --> 01:48:33,015
What are you doing here?
2095
01:48:33,148 --> 01:48:35,352
I need you to come
with me, okay?
2096
01:48:35,486 --> 01:48:36,854
Please, just don't
be here, okay?
2097
01:48:36,986 --> 01:48:39,123
- Is this even real?
- You know I'm real, okay?
2098
01:48:39,255 --> 01:48:42,293
And I just need you
to not leave right now.
2099
01:48:44,026 --> 01:48:46,061
I know I told you to run away,
but I...
2100
01:48:46,195 --> 01:48:47,697
I need to talk to you
one more time.
2101
01:48:47,830 --> 01:48:49,766
Talk to me about what?
I don't understand.
2102
01:48:49,900 --> 01:48:51,802
I need to tell you something.
I need to...
2103
01:48:51,936 --> 01:48:53,904
I wanted to say...
2104
01:48:55,371 --> 01:48:57,206
Please.
2105
01:48:57,340 --> 01:48:59,442
I wanted to say goodbye.
2106
01:49:04,882 --> 01:49:07,083
No, no.
Not goodbye.
2107
01:49:07,217 --> 01:49:09,052
No, just come with me, please.
Just...
2108
01:49:09,186 --> 01:49:10,888
I need you to not be here
if this is where it happens.
2109
01:49:11,021 --> 01:49:12,856
Just do not be
where you're expected.
2110
01:49:12,990 --> 01:49:14,291
Please, I don't have any time!
2111
01:49:14,423 --> 01:49:15,625
I don't understand.
2112
01:49:15,758 --> 01:49:17,226
I don't have any time
to explain!
2113
01:49:17,360 --> 01:49:18,795
Explain what?
2114
01:49:31,874 --> 01:49:33,476
I love you.
2115
01:49:33,610 --> 01:49:36,580
Yeah, you.
2116
01:49:36,713 --> 01:49:39,382
I know it.
2117
01:49:39,517 --> 01:49:40,785
I know it because I love you
2118
01:49:40,918 --> 01:49:45,121
without any of the stuff
that I thought mattered.
2119
01:49:46,389 --> 01:49:48,057
I think you love me too.
2120
01:49:48,191 --> 01:49:51,262
And I don't want to leave here
unless I hear it.
2121
01:49:52,995 --> 01:49:54,864
Something bad
is gonna happen.
2122
01:49:54,998 --> 01:49:56,700
And I need to stop it.
2123
01:49:56,833 --> 01:49:57,968
I'm sure as fuck gonna try,
2124
01:49:58,102 --> 01:49:59,770
because I don't want to live
without you.
2125
01:49:59,902 --> 01:50:02,940
The only thing
I have to lose is you.
2126
01:50:04,307 --> 01:50:07,476
If saving you here means I lose
you forever, I don't care!
2127
01:50:07,611 --> 01:50:08,912
Because you need to live,
2128
01:50:09,044 --> 01:50:11,714
even if I don't get
to share it with you.
2129
01:50:11,848 --> 01:50:14,918
You have the entire world,
2130
01:50:15,052 --> 01:50:16,853
and I only have you.
2131
01:50:20,656 --> 01:50:22,759
But I love you.
2132
01:50:22,892 --> 01:50:25,294
I do.
2133
01:50:25,428 --> 01:50:27,531
I love you.
2134
01:50:55,793 --> 01:50:57,962
I love you.
2135
01:51:00,297 --> 01:51:04,701
Michael, it's time.
Let her go.
2136
01:51:04,834 --> 01:51:06,102
You have to come with me.
2137
01:51:06,236 --> 01:51:07,338
No.
2138
01:51:07,471 --> 01:51:09,440
No, that's not right.
2139
01:51:09,572 --> 01:51:10,906
Honey Bee, look at me.
2140
01:51:11,040 --> 01:51:13,143
You need to run!
Leave now!
2141
01:51:13,977 --> 01:51:16,213
I want to stay with you.
2142
01:51:19,583 --> 01:51:21,351
I...
2143
01:51:21,485 --> 01:51:22,486
Let her go.
2144
01:51:22,619 --> 01:51:24,789
Trust me, go!
2145
01:51:39,736 --> 01:51:43,808
No!
2146
01:52:38,562 --> 01:52:41,465
This is what
I was warning you about.
2147
01:52:43,133 --> 01:52:44,635
So she comes here,
what happens?
2148
01:52:44,767 --> 01:52:46,837
Where do I find her?
2149
01:52:46,969 --> 01:52:49,138
She died alone, too, right?
2150
01:52:50,374 --> 01:52:51,675
If it was going to happen,
2151
01:52:51,807 --> 01:52:54,977
it would have happened
right then.
2152
01:52:55,111 --> 01:52:57,848
If both of you
had felt complete love,
2153
01:52:57,981 --> 01:53:00,551
we wouldn't be
sitting here right now.
2154
01:53:01,618 --> 01:53:02,986
It's time.
2155
01:53:03,119 --> 01:53:05,922
I'm sorry.
I don't make the rules.
2156
01:53:06,056 --> 01:53:08,525
Well, the rules
are obviously wrong.
2157
01:53:09,825 --> 01:53:12,261
We loved each other.
2158
01:53:12,395 --> 01:53:14,196
You were there.
You heard her.
2159
01:53:14,329 --> 01:53:17,232
Okay, she was gonna say it.
2160
01:53:17,234 --> 01:53:20,169
That means we move on together.
2161
01:53:20,303 --> 01:53:22,306
I need to talk to whoever
makes the rules, okay?
2162
01:53:22,438 --> 01:53:25,275
Assemble the fucking committee.
Who do I got to talk to?
2163
01:53:25,407 --> 01:53:27,343
- Michael.
- She was willing to die
2164
01:53:27,477 --> 01:53:31,081
even if it meant giving up
her life to be with me.
2165
01:53:31,213 --> 01:53:32,749
Isn't that enough?
2166
01:53:32,883 --> 01:53:34,784
Isn't that enough
for you fuckers?
2167
01:53:34,918 --> 01:53:36,786
No.
2168
01:53:36,919 --> 01:53:39,255
It's not.
2169
01:53:39,388 --> 01:53:45,228
You keep thinking that
it's a vote or a decision,
2170
01:53:45,361 --> 01:53:47,129
but it's not.
It's...
2171
01:53:47,263 --> 01:53:49,298
It's like a chemical reaction.
2172
01:53:49,432 --> 01:53:51,600
Water either becomes steam,
or it doesn't.
2173
01:53:51,735 --> 01:53:54,103
We don't vote it
into being steam.
2174
01:53:54,236 --> 01:53:56,772
Enough
with the fucking metaphors!
2175
01:53:56,905 --> 01:53:58,907
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
2176
01:53:59,042 --> 01:54:01,111
Look...
2177
01:54:01,245 --> 01:54:03,546
Can I just see her
one more time?
2178
01:54:03,679 --> 01:54:04,847
Is that too much to ask?
2179
01:54:04,981 --> 01:54:07,316
Just one more moment
with her, please?
2180
01:54:07,450 --> 01:54:08,984
Just one more fucking moment.
2181
01:54:09,119 --> 01:54:12,089
- It doesn't work like that.
- Then change how it works!
2182
01:54:13,057 --> 01:54:15,292
They're not gonna fire you
for helping out one person.
2183
01:54:15,424 --> 01:54:17,793
Okay?
Just please, I'm begging you.
2184
01:54:17,927 --> 01:54:19,129
Just...
2185
01:54:19,262 --> 01:54:20,797
What are they gonna do,
demote you?
2186
01:54:20,929 --> 01:54:22,266
- Please come with me.
- Here.
2187
01:54:22,398 --> 01:54:23,933
- Michael.
- Here, here.
2188
01:54:24,066 --> 01:54:26,002
No, here.
2189
01:54:26,136 --> 01:54:30,540
If it's tails, I'll drop it.
I'll leave you alone about it.
2190
01:54:32,142 --> 01:54:34,278
Would you please
come with me?
2191
01:54:35,344 --> 01:54:37,847
You're telling me it's all
a coin flip anyway.
2192
01:54:37,981 --> 01:54:39,550
That fate's random.
2193
01:54:39,682 --> 01:54:41,183
You turn left,
you meet the person
2194
01:54:41,317 --> 01:54:42,718
you're supposed to spend
eternity with.
2195
01:54:42,852 --> 01:54:45,321
You turn right, I've got
to follow you to some office
2196
01:54:45,454 --> 01:54:47,990
or wherever you're taking me.
2197
01:54:48,124 --> 01:54:50,093
Just let me flip it again.
2198
01:54:51,561 --> 01:54:53,263
I'm just asking for one minute.
2199
01:54:53,396 --> 01:54:55,799
One 60-second moment
of eternity,
2200
01:54:55,932 --> 01:54:57,334
and you can't spare that?
2201
01:54:57,467 --> 01:54:59,335
Okay, I never believed in
a goddamn thing my whole life,
2202
01:54:59,468 --> 01:55:01,837
and now, of all things,
I find out that love is real
2203
01:55:01,972 --> 01:55:03,306
and you're telling me
it doesn't...
2204
01:55:03,440 --> 01:55:05,241
because I can't prove it
to your satisfaction?
2205
01:55:05,374 --> 01:55:06,243
- What is that?
- Michael.
2206
01:55:06,375 --> 01:55:07,543
Wait, wait.
Please.
2207
01:55:07,677 --> 01:55:10,146
Whatever you're gonna say,
just stop, okay.
2208
01:55:10,280 --> 01:55:13,549
Before you were this person,
before you had this job,
2209
01:55:13,682 --> 01:55:15,051
when you were a real
fucking human being...
2210
01:55:15,185 --> 01:55:17,620
Michael, we don't have
time for this.
2211
01:55:17,754 --> 01:55:19,322
Can't you just...
2212
01:55:19,455 --> 01:55:22,392
Can't the universe spare
just one last goodbye?
2213
01:55:23,593 --> 01:55:26,263
Just please come with me.
2214
01:56:15,678 --> 01:56:18,181
I love you too.
2215
01:57:11,272 --> 01:57:13,070
Provided by explosiveskull
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