1
00:00:20,562 --> 00:00:21,479
[sighs]

2
00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:29,029
Boy, you got old.

3
00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:32,782
Look who's talking.

4
00:00:33,283 --> 00:00:35,285
[inhales deeply] How're you feeling?

5
00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:40,373
I know you mean well,
but that is a stupid question.

6
00:00:40,457 --> 00:00:42,250
-[laughs]
-Where's Mindy?

7
00:00:42,333 --> 00:00:45,045
Uh, she and Martin went
to get something to eat.

8
00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:47,297
And you stayed to keep an eye on me?

9
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,841
Oh, don't flatter yourself.

10
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:51,301
[chuckles]

11
00:00:55,346 --> 00:00:59,934
So, how long were you planning
on keeping your condition a secret?

12
00:01:00,518 --> 00:01:01,436
What condition?

13
00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:06,524
I don't know. I just wanted
to spend time with my daughter

14
00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:08,318
without her having to worry about me.

15
00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:10,320
Roz, she's worried.

16
00:01:10,403 --> 00:01:11,279
Yeah.

17
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:14,991
But you're not alone.
We're gonna get you through this.

18
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:21,081
Yeah. Well, I appreciate your concern,
but this does not end well.

19
00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,583
You don't know that.
I mean, there… there's, uh, chemo--

20
00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:24,876
-Did it.
-Bone marrow--

21
00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:27,170
-Did it.
-All kinds of holistic stuff--

22
00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:29,089
Bunch of bullshit. And did it.

23
00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:31,674
[exhales] Well, I'm sure
there's things that you didn't do.

24
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,384
-Sandy…
-[Sandy] Sorry.

25
00:01:33,468 --> 00:01:36,387
I forgot my ex-wife
is the smartest person in the world.

26
00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:41,392
Is that why all your other ex-wives
are dumber than a bag of rocks?

27
00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:43,770
-Ooh. That's a low blow.
-[Roz] Mmm.

28
00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:46,439
But maybe. Yeah.

29
00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:49,025
Assuming that you're right about this,
what's your plan?

30
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:51,236
Well, it's pretty simple, really.

31
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:55,865
After a while, I go into assisted living
then hospice.

32
00:01:55,949 --> 00:02:01,204
And then I get to find out if helping
sick people in third-world countries

33
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:03,373
gets me a meet and greet with Jesus.

34
00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:07,669
You are a piece of work.

35
00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:09,921
I remember when you thought
I was a piece of ass.

36
00:02:10,004 --> 00:02:11,798
I always said that as a compliment.

37
00:02:11,881 --> 00:02:13,591
And I took it as one.

38
00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:14,509
[Sandy laughs]

39
00:02:15,718 --> 00:02:18,304
So, listen, um,
your plans are no good.

40
00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:21,641
There's not gonna be an assisted living
or a hospice.

41
00:02:21,724 --> 00:02:23,935
You stay with me and Mindy.

42
00:02:24,018 --> 00:02:26,271
If we need help, we'll bring somebody in.

43
00:02:26,354 --> 00:02:28,064
That's not gonna work.

44
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:30,900
It's too hard. Too exhausting.

45
00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:32,861
Oh, stop being so smart.

46
00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:34,028
Too expensive.

47
00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:37,615
Aha! You forgot
your daughter is Mindy Warbucks.

48
00:02:37,699 --> 00:02:40,076
Besides, every dollar we spend on you

49
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,329
is a dollar not spent on hair plugs

50
00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,331
for Estelle Schneider's little boy.

51
00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,584
You aren't serious.

52
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:51,880
He has expressed a desire
to bring back the, uh… the pompadour.

53
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:52,964
[laughs]

54
00:02:53,047 --> 00:02:55,425
"Kookie, lend me your comb."

55
00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:56,551
[laughs]

56
00:02:56,634 --> 00:02:58,219
All right. So, why?

57
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:00,054
[Sandy] Why what?

58
00:03:00,972 --> 00:03:03,266
Why, after all these years of…

59
00:03:05,476 --> 00:03:06,936
after all these years…

60
00:03:07,562 --> 00:03:08,396
[groans softly]

61
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:11,983
Don't overthink it. I… I just, uh, do.

62
00:03:12,483 --> 00:03:15,111
Well, are you a recovering alcoholic?

63
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:18,198
-You making amends?
-I said, don't overthink it.

64
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,659
[Martin] I'm curious.
Were you born cesarean or vaginal?

65
00:03:21,743 --> 00:03:22,911
Cover me.

66
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,079
What? Why?

67
00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:28,374
I'm gonna guess vaginal,
'cause of how close you are with your mom.

68
00:03:28,458 --> 00:03:29,709
I was cesarean.

69
00:03:29,792 --> 00:03:32,128
My mother couldn't be bothered to push.

70
00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:34,589
-[Mindy] Hey.
-Shh.

71
00:03:34,672 --> 00:03:36,841
-She okay?
-[mouthing]

72
00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:48,645
[sniffs] Do you know, to this day,
I eat Jell-O, I think of Bill Cosby?

73
00:03:48,728 --> 00:03:50,980
I feel guilty now
'cause I… I still enjoy it.

74
00:03:52,315 --> 00:03:53,441
'Cause the-- Hmm.

75
00:03:55,318 --> 00:03:57,070
[theme music playing]

76
00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,284
-[laughing]
-And then the sparks fly…

77
00:04:03,368 --> 00:04:05,411
[students chattering indistinctly]

78
00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:07,288
Oh, okay. That makes sense.

79
00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:08,206
[Lane laughs]

80
00:04:08,289 --> 00:04:11,125
[Theresa] I had a retainer, but I lost it.
They're very expensive.

81
00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:13,253
[groans]

82
00:04:17,715 --> 00:04:18,549
No.

83
00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:21,552
-This isn't about money.
-We're here to help mankind.

84
00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:23,638
Oh, will you just stop it with that shit?

85
00:04:23,721 --> 00:04:25,682
-[Robbie] It's true.
-I don't care. Just stop it!

86
00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:29,936
[grunts] Make it fast.

87
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:34,274
Okay, so, uh, we just wanted to thank you
for honoring Dad's…

88
00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:35,191
[Sandy] Faster.

89
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,402
…wishes, and we wanna do that too.

90
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,362
-So what we're proposing--
-Time's up.

91
00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:42,782
Is to create a philanthropic foundation
that gives grandpa's money to good causes,

92
00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:44,951
with a special focus
on healthcare and education.

93
00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:47,870
-[sighs]
-[Phoebe] Thoughts?

94
00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:51,624
-Questions?
-Yeah. What's the catch?

95
00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:53,209
There's no catch.

96
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,795
We just got to talking
about what would make grandpa happy,

97
00:04:55,878 --> 00:04:56,879
and we came up with this.

98
00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:59,507
The Norman Newlander Family Foundation.

99
00:04:59,590 --> 00:05:01,634
Our mission statement is
to help down-stats--

100
00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:02,844
Down-stats?

101
00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:03,886
Poor people.

102
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:06,556
[splutters] Is to help poor people

103
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:09,142
get access to free healthcare
and pursue their educational goals.

104
00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:10,601
With scholarships.

105
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:12,770
That is what he wanted.

106
00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:13,688
[Phoebe] Right?

107
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:17,817
So, uh, what's in it for you?

108
00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:23,031
Well, giving away all this money
would be our full-time job.

109
00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:25,491
We would just need
some kind of compensation.

110
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:26,868
To cover expenses and such.

111
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:28,286
Sure. Yeah.

112
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:31,831
So?

113
00:05:32,957 --> 00:05:35,168
-So, what?
-So, give me a number.

114
00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:36,919
Well, before we do that,

115
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:39,630
I think it's important to factor in
what we bring to the job.

116
00:05:39,714 --> 00:05:42,008
My training as a Scientology registrar
is particularly--

117
00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,593
What's the number?

118
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:46,054
-A million dollars a year.
-Each.

119
00:06:00,526 --> 00:06:02,570
-Half a million?
-Get out of here.

120
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:06,699
-"Scientology registrar," really?
-[door closes]

121
00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,743
What's your résumé say, "dope fiend"?

122
00:06:08,826 --> 00:06:10,203
Hey, I'm in recovery.

123
00:06:10,286 --> 00:06:13,581
-Hey, I'm an operating thetan.
-You're an operating asshole.

124
00:06:13,664 --> 00:06:14,624
[both shivering]

125
00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:18,086
[Jude] Winning that ticket, Rose, was
the best thing that ever happened to me,

126
00:06:18,169 --> 00:06:22,006
because it brought me to you.
And for that, I am… I'm thankful.

127
00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:26,386
I'm thankful, Rose,
so you… you… you must do me this honor.

128
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:29,263
-Promise me that you'll survive.
-[gasping]

129
00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:33,017
No matter what happens.
No matter how hopeless.

130
00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:34,268
Promise me.

131
00:06:34,852 --> 00:06:37,021
And never let go of that promise, Rose.

132
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:40,024
Never let go.

133
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:42,318
[whimpering] I'll never let go.

134
00:06:45,113 --> 00:06:46,322
I will never let go.

135
00:06:50,535 --> 00:06:51,452
[crying softly]

136
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:56,165
[Breana crying softly]

137
00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:06,134
Jack, there's… there's a boat.

138
00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:07,051
[gasping]

139
00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:09,345
There's a boat, Ja… Jack.

140
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:13,558
Come back.

141
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:17,186
Come back! [sobs]

142
00:07:17,895 --> 00:07:19,063
I'll never let go.

143
00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:20,189
[whimpering]

144
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:25,695
[whistle peeps faintly]

145
00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:26,696
[Breana gasping]

146
00:07:32,201 --> 00:07:33,494
And scene!

147
00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:35,496
[students applauding, cheering]

148
00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,081
Terrific! Good job.

149
00:07:39,083 --> 00:07:40,001
Thank you.

150
00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:42,378
Okay. Grab a seat, and, uh,

151
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:44,672
let's talk about this scene.

152
00:07:45,381 --> 00:07:47,550
Or, more specifically,

153
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:49,844
let's talk about the subject matter

154
00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:51,679
of the scene.

155
00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:56,601
Dying, on camera or on stage,

156
00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:02,857
to play a heartbreaking
and hopefully slow death,

157
00:08:03,774 --> 00:08:06,194
is the dream of every actor.

158
00:08:07,528 --> 00:08:11,908
I would wager there's not an actor
or actress who hasn't fantasized

159
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:15,703
about how they would play
those final moments.

160
00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:19,373
As the life force slowly slips away

161
00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:24,629
and as we teeter
on the edge of nonexistence,

162
00:08:25,713 --> 00:08:32,011
how would we gasp out those last words
of wit and wisdom?

163
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:36,349
But is that what happens
as death draws close?

164
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:41,437
Do the dying exact promises
from those they leave behind?

165
00:08:42,438 --> 00:08:44,148
Do they confess their sins?

166
00:08:44,649 --> 00:08:46,234
Do they make a joke?

167
00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:48,528
Don't get me wrong.

168
00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:51,447
I'm not taking issue with the scene
or the way you guys performed it.

169
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,199
You did a great job.

170
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:58,120
What I'm asking you to think about…

171
00:09:00,122 --> 00:09:05,461
is what actually happens
in those final moments.

172
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:09,674
I'm not talking
about a shocking, violent death.

173
00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:13,219
I'm talking about…

174
00:09:13,302 --> 00:09:14,136
[exhales]

175
00:09:15,721 --> 00:09:17,348
…when you know it's coming.

176
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,145
When you've fully surrendered

177
00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:28,359
to the… ultimate magic trick.

178
00:09:29,944 --> 00:09:32,572
When we really and truly

179
00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:35,116
disappear.

180
00:09:37,159 --> 00:09:40,997
[exhales] I've sat at the bedside,
and I've held the hands of friends and…

181
00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:42,999
and loved ones

182
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:46,335
as they breathed their last breath.

183
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:50,464
[exhales] And I can tell you this.

184
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:54,468
The dramatic soliloquy at the end of life

185
00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:57,555
is pure and utter nonsense.

186
00:09:59,181 --> 00:10:01,809
If anything is being said, it's internal.

187
00:10:04,395 --> 00:10:07,023
You can almost hear it.

188
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:13,029
They're having an internal conversation

189
00:10:13,112 --> 00:10:17,366
filled with disbelief and… and… and wonder

190
00:10:18,576 --> 00:10:22,163
that their life has come to an end.

191
00:10:24,832 --> 00:10:28,336
They hardly notice you
sitting there at all.

192
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:31,922
For the dying,

193
00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:35,092
the living are irrelevant.

194
00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:41,641
[clears throat] So,

195
00:10:42,558 --> 00:10:46,228
if you should ever have
the opportunity to play such a scene,

196
00:10:47,521 --> 00:10:49,482
approach it with reverence.

197
00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:51,776
Consider it holy.

198
00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:56,280
Make sure it receives your utmost care

199
00:10:58,032 --> 00:10:59,116
and respect.

200
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:05,665
Uh, okay. [chuckles]

201
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:07,124
Uh, that's enough from me.

202
00:11:07,208 --> 00:11:10,294
Um, before we call it a night,
I have an announcement to make.

203
00:11:10,378 --> 00:11:13,714
Sort of a good news,
bad news kind of thing.

204
00:11:13,798 --> 00:11:14,632
Um…

205
00:11:15,424 --> 00:11:17,009
The good news is

206
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,720
yours truly has been cast in a movie.

207
00:11:19,804 --> 00:11:21,681
-[gasps] Wow!
-[all exclaiming]

208
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:24,308
Thank you. I'm very excited too.

209
00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:26,852
Last time I was
in front of a camera was at the DMV.

210
00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:28,312
[all laughing]

211
00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:31,732
The bad news is I will not be here
for a few months.

212
00:11:31,816 --> 00:11:34,151
Obviously, if you prepaid
for your classes,

213
00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:35,611
you'll be fully reimbursed,

214
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:39,824
or if you want to continue working,
Mindy will be taking over my classes.

215
00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:41,075
I want my money back.

216
00:11:41,158 --> 00:11:42,535
It's your call.

217
00:11:42,618 --> 00:11:45,413
-I'd like to keep working with Mindy.
-Yeah. Me too.

218
00:11:45,496 --> 00:11:47,665
-Mindy's cool.
-I'll stick around.

219
00:11:47,748 --> 00:11:48,708
Yeah. Why not?

220
00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:50,876
I changed my mind. I'll stay.

221
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:54,213
Sandy,
I'm so happy for you about the movie.

222
00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:57,591
-Thank you, Margaret.
-You're gonna be awesome.

223
00:11:58,884 --> 00:12:00,010
I'm gonna miss you.

224
00:12:01,637 --> 00:12:02,596
All of you.

225
00:12:03,764 --> 00:12:06,183
I'm annoying? I'm annoying?
I'm trying to eat a meal by myself.

226
00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:09,478
If you wanna give him the sandwich,
give him the sandwich. If you don't--

227
00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:12,231
-[man] Well, look at his eyes!
-I ask one simple question…

228
00:12:12,314 --> 00:12:16,110
It's hard to believe these guys were
all unknown actors when Barry cast 'em.

229
00:12:16,694 --> 00:12:19,113
If you can see 'em. Can you see 'em?

230
00:12:19,196 --> 00:12:20,698
Everybody can see 'em, Martin.

231
00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,118
Is that Kevin Bacon? He's so tiny.

232
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:29,331
Hey, ask Levinson if… if he's a nice guy,
'cause I heard otherwise.

233
00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:31,292
I'll be sure to bring it up with him.

234
00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:34,170
Could we just take a break for a moment?

235
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,589
You okay? You need anything?

236
00:12:36,672 --> 00:12:39,216
Yeah, no, I'm fine. I just--

237
00:12:39,717 --> 00:12:40,843
Well, I wanna talk.

238
00:12:41,552 --> 00:12:45,181
First of all, I want to apologize
for not being honest

239
00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,933
about what was going on with me.

240
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,435
I thought that I could--

241
00:12:49,518 --> 00:12:52,480
Well, I-- I don't know
what I was thinking. [chuckles]

242
00:12:52,563 --> 00:12:53,606
It was stupid.

243
00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:57,026
Mom, you're entitled to your privacy.

244
00:12:57,109 --> 00:12:59,737
No. I can't, in good conscience,

245
00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:03,157
call this one stupid,
unless I call it on myself.

246
00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:04,909
Thank you.

247
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:08,788
Second, I'd like to see
this wedding happen sooner

248
00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:09,789
rather than later.

249
00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:13,876
I'll try to help with the planning
all I can, but as you can see,

250
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,378
there's not… there's not much I can do.

251
00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:19,131
Oh, no, no, no.
We… we'll make all the arrangements.

252
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:21,592
-You don't have to do anything.
-Oh.

253
00:13:21,675 --> 00:13:25,554
Well, one request.
I do want to walk Mindy down the aisle.

254
00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:28,724
Uh, that's my job.

255
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,643
Really?
You're gonna make an issue of this?

256
00:13:31,727 --> 00:13:33,979
-No.
-We could do it together.

257
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:35,439
I… I… I'm good with that.

258
00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:38,484
Oh, and, Martin, of course, I assume

259
00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:40,986
you'll want to walk down the aisle
with your mother.

260
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:48,077
Sure. Yeah. Or I could fly solo.
I don't know. [chuckles] Either way.

261
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:51,038
She's-- You know, she's-- The thing is
she's not really much of a walker.

262
00:13:51,121 --> 00:13:52,581
She teaches cha-cha.

263
00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:55,918
Martin, you really should do it
with your mom.

264
00:13:58,420 --> 00:14:00,673
[mouthing]

265
00:14:00,756 --> 00:14:02,633
Whatever. [chuckles] Sure. Okay.

266
00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:07,179
And I was thinking,
if we want to keep it simple,

267
00:14:07,263 --> 00:14:10,891
we could have the ceremony and the party
at your studio.

268
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,226
Well, I… I love that.

269
00:14:12,309 --> 00:14:14,144
I thought you might.

270
00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:17,106
Oh, and of course you pick
your favorite restaurant

271
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:18,399
to do all the catering.

272
00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:22,194
-Okay.
-Although you can't go wrong with Spago.

273
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:27,575
We'll keep it small and intimate
with just close friends and family.

274
00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:30,744
-Sounds right.
-And a DJ instead of a band.

275
00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:34,331
Okay, but… but playing records, right?
Not the scratchy thing?

276
00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:36,292
-Yeah.
-You know? I don't like that.

277
00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:41,046
Now, do either of you have a minister
or… or rabbi or… or priest

278
00:14:41,130 --> 00:14:42,590
that you want to do the wedding?

279
00:14:43,173 --> 00:14:44,049
No.

280
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:47,094
Fine. Then I'll do it.

281
00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:49,513
And if you don't mind,
I'd like to contribute

282
00:14:49,597 --> 00:14:52,016
to the centerpieces
and floral arrangements,

283
00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:53,893
boutonnieres, et cetera.

284
00:14:53,976 --> 00:14:54,810
Sure.

285
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:59,231
And you can pay for the rehearsal dinner
and the bachelor party.

286
00:15:00,983 --> 00:15:03,652
You got some guys you'd like to invite
to a bachelor party?

287
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,195
Most of my friends are dead.

288
00:15:05,779 --> 00:15:08,532
-Great. I can afford an open bar.
-Oh.

289
00:15:10,826 --> 00:15:13,412
Okay. Well, sounds like a plan. [chuckles]

290
00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:17,124
-It's getting late. We're gonna turn in.
-Yeah?

291
00:15:17,207 --> 00:15:18,792
-[Mindy] Yeah.
-Okay.

292
00:15:20,294 --> 00:15:21,170
Good night. [chuckles]

293
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,922
-[Mindy] Night.
-[Roz] Good night.

294
00:15:23,422 --> 00:15:26,175
First she's too sick to plan anything,
then she plans everything?

295
00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:27,343
Just keep walking.

296
00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:31,931
Martin? I am really looking forward
to meeting your mom.

297
00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:36,477
Ah, yeah, I'm sure
you… you two will hit it off.

298
00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,063
[Roz laughs]

299
00:15:39,146 --> 00:15:41,231
That is such fun.

300
00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:43,943
-I told you.
-[both laughing]

301
00:15:48,405 --> 00:15:50,574
-You all comfy?
-Yes.

302
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:53,786
-Hmm. Want another blanket?
-No. I'm fine.

303
00:15:53,869 --> 00:15:54,703
Okay.

304
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:57,623
You got water, meds, book, phone.

305
00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:01,210
-Anything else that you need?
-No. That's it.

306
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:04,004
Okay. I'm off.

307
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:06,799
What, no tongue?

308
00:16:06,882 --> 00:16:09,468
Ooh, you want tongue.
I'll give you tongue.

309
00:16:09,551 --> 00:16:11,929
-Oh, shit, no. I was just bluffing.
-[both laugh]

310
00:16:12,012 --> 00:16:13,889
Uh, you gonna read,
or should I get the lights?

311
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:15,599
-Oh, get the lights. [exhales]
-Okay.

312
00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:21,730
-Good night.
-Good night.

313
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:22,690
[door closes]

314
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:29,822
["Working in the Coal Mine"
by The Judds playing]

315
00:16:32,157 --> 00:16:35,202
♪ Workin' in the coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

316
00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:38,497
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

317
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:41,750
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

318
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:45,754
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

319
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:48,549
♪ Five o'clock in the mornin' ♪

320
00:16:48,632 --> 00:16:51,385
♪ I'm already up and gone ♪

321
00:16:52,761 --> 00:16:55,264
♪ Lord, I'm so tired ♪

322
00:16:55,764 --> 00:16:58,267
♪ How long can this go on? ♪

323
00:16:58,350 --> 00:17:01,562
♪ Workin' in the coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

324
00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:04,815
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

325
00:17:04,898 --> 00:17:08,152
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

326
00:17:08,235 --> 00:17:12,072
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

327
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:14,533
♪ 'Cause I make a little money ♪

328
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,828
♪ Haulin' coal by the ton ♪

329
00:17:17,911 --> 00:17:21,123
♪ When Saturday rolls around ♪

330
00:17:21,915 --> 00:17:24,793
♪ I'm too tired for havin' fun ♪

331
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:28,172
♪ Workin' in the coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

332
00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:31,383
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

333
00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:34,678
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

334
00:17:34,762 --> 00:17:38,474
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

335
00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:43,437
♪ Lord, I'm so tired ♪

336
00:17:45,564 --> 00:17:48,275
♪ How long can this go on? ♪

337
00:17:50,944 --> 00:17:54,198
♪ Workin' in the coal mine
Goin' on down, down ♪

338
00:17:54,281 --> 00:17:57,451
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down ♪

339
00:17:57,534 --> 00:18:00,621
♪ Workin' in a coal mine
Goin' on down, down… ♪

340
00:18:01,246 --> 00:18:03,749
[Sandy] So? What do you think?

341
00:18:03,832 --> 00:18:05,542
I think you're gonna get an Oscar.

342
00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:08,629
Okay.
If you're gonna be ridiculous, never mind.

343
00:18:08,712 --> 00:18:11,632
Why? No, you're doing great work.

344
00:18:12,257 --> 00:18:14,676
And I should know. I'm a doctor.

345
00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:16,804
Okay, fine. [chuckles] Thanks.

346
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:19,473
It's gonna be released
on one of those streaming deals anyway,

347
00:18:19,556 --> 00:18:21,141
so it won't be eligible for an Oscar.

348
00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:24,019
-Nobel Peace Prize.
-]Sandy] There you go.

349
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,479
-[laughs]
-[phone vibrates]

350
00:18:26,396 --> 00:18:27,648
Ah, Mindy.

351
00:18:27,731 --> 00:18:29,274
-[phone beeps]
-Yeah. Hi, Min.

352
00:18:30,025 --> 00:18:31,777
No. We're… we're on our way.

353
00:18:32,528 --> 00:18:35,405
Great. I'm looking forward to meeting her.

354
00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:37,116
-Who?
-Martin's mother just arrived.

355
00:18:37,699 --> 00:18:39,701
Should we stop and get a bottle of wine?

356
00:18:40,994 --> 00:18:43,580
-What? That's terrible.
-What happened?

357
00:18:43,664 --> 00:18:45,541
No. No, that's not right.

358
00:18:45,624 --> 00:18:47,376
-What's not right?
-Hold on.

359
00:18:47,459 --> 00:18:51,088
Martin's mother made a joke
about Mindy's weight.

360
00:18:51,171 --> 00:18:53,924
-What kind of joke?
-Is there a good kind?

361
00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:57,469
Honey, listen. She's a stupid old woman.

362
00:18:57,553 --> 00:18:58,762
Just ignore her.

363
00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:02,391
-Ah, damn. Asshole.
-What asshole?

364
00:19:02,474 --> 00:19:03,934
No. You're right.

365
00:19:04,601 --> 00:19:07,187
He has to defend you.
Otherwise, what good is he?

366
00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:08,438
Is this Martin?

367
00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:11,024
He said nothing.
He just giggled like a little boy.

368
00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:13,443
All right. Listen-- No.

369
00:19:13,527 --> 00:19:17,156
Wait.
Don't you think that's a little extreme?

370
00:19:18,740 --> 00:19:21,368
Yeah. All right. I'll ask.

371
00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:26,039
She's really upset,
and she doesn't want to stay there.

372
00:19:26,123 --> 00:19:27,916
Of course. She doesn't have to ask.

373
00:19:28,709 --> 00:19:31,712
-He says of course.
-Wait, wait, wait. Well, what about you?

374
00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:33,172
What you do mean, "What about me?"

375
00:19:33,255 --> 00:19:35,174
I'm not staying
with Martin and his mother.

376
00:19:35,257 --> 00:19:36,592
Right. Yeah. You're right.

377
00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:39,136
She says thank you.
Honey, do me a favor.

378
00:19:39,219 --> 00:19:42,764
Throw all my stuff in the suitcase
and, uh, bring it with you, okay?

379
00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:44,266
Yeah. We'll meet you there.

380
00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:47,352
And, sweetheart, don't worry.

381
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:49,438
This will all work out.

382
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:50,939
I love you too.

383
00:19:51,815 --> 00:19:52,858
-Bye.
-[phone beeps]

384
00:19:55,819 --> 00:19:57,613
-Well, shit.
-Yeah.

385
00:19:59,323 --> 00:20:01,658
You know, I just have the two bedrooms.

386
00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:03,911
-You got a couch?
-Yeah.

387
00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:06,121
Then you'll be fine.

388
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:11,543
I don't blame her. She's not the problem.

389
00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:14,046
She's just an evil, old, brain-dead cunt.

390
00:20:14,129 --> 00:20:14,963
It's him.

391
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:17,841
He doesn't have the balls
to stand up to her!

392
00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:20,010
Some honey for my honey?

393
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:26,058
I'm just glad this happened now
before the wedding.

394
00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:29,228
Otherwise, I'd be shackled
to that mama's boy for life.

395
00:20:34,024 --> 00:20:34,858
Yes.

396
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:37,069
Martin should have said something,

397
00:20:37,152 --> 00:20:39,571
but that doesn't mean he's not a good guy.

398
00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:42,115
He's just trying
to be respectful of his mom.

399
00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:43,200
[Mindy] Fuck him!

400
00:20:43,283 --> 00:20:47,537
The whole time she was picking me apart,
he was looking down at his shoes.

401
00:20:47,621 --> 00:20:51,250
Stupid, ugly homemade shoes.

402
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,293
You got anything stronger?

403
00:20:53,877 --> 00:20:55,796
-Uh, bourbon?
-Bring it!

404
00:20:56,964 --> 00:20:58,632
I don't care how old she is.

405
00:20:58,715 --> 00:21:00,550
I don't take that shit from anybody.

406
00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:01,677
Nor should you.

407
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:05,847
The last person who talked to me like that
is still looking for his left nut.

408
00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:07,474
[Roz] Oh my. Um…

409
00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:11,061
You know, I think it would be a good idea
if we all got a good night's sleep

410
00:21:11,144 --> 00:21:12,896
and revisit this in the morning.

411
00:21:12,980 --> 00:21:14,731
There's nothing to revisit.

412
00:21:14,815 --> 00:21:17,192
The wedding's off. Good night.

413
00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:20,362
[exhales]

414
00:21:20,445 --> 00:21:21,530
Sweet dreams.

415
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:23,573
Really?

416
00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:25,200
[sighs]

417
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:34,209
-[car door slams]
-[Sandy grunts] I got a five a.m. call.

418
00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:35,585
Look what I'm doing.

419
00:21:37,170 --> 00:21:38,005
[spits]

420
00:21:38,755 --> 00:21:39,631
[banging on door]

421
00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:43,302
-What the hell? You'll wake her up.
-Ask me if I give a shit.

422
00:21:43,385 --> 00:21:46,722
You need to go to my house,
get down on your knees

423
00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:48,849
and beg Mindy to forgive you.

424
00:21:48,932 --> 00:21:50,517
Okay. It's… it's a little late.

425
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:53,228
Can I beg first thing in the morning
when I'm fresh?

426
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:56,732
-[Estelle] What's going on?
-Oh, hi, Mom. Uh, this is Sandy.

427
00:21:56,815 --> 00:21:58,066
That's Mindy's dad.

428
00:21:58,150 --> 00:21:59,860
-This is, uh, my mom.
-Nice to meet you.

429
00:21:59,943 --> 00:22:03,322
-Do you have any idea what time it is?
-I know exactly what time it is.

430
00:22:03,405 --> 00:22:05,324
So, what, you just don't care
about other people?

431
00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:08,201
You bang on doors and shoot your mouth off
while they're trying to sleep?

432
00:22:08,285 --> 00:22:09,786
I'm here to keep your son

433
00:22:09,870 --> 00:22:12,456
from losing the best thing
that's ever happened to him.

434
00:22:12,539 --> 00:22:15,083
I'm the best thing
that ever happened to him.

435
00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:17,461
And your daughter
wouldn't have run crying to Daddy

436
00:22:17,544 --> 00:22:19,921
if you raised her
to withstand a little criticism.

437
00:22:20,005 --> 00:22:22,299
You're questioning how I raised my kid?

438
00:22:22,382 --> 00:22:23,675
Look at this mutt.

439
00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:25,802
Is this what you call a success story?

440
00:22:25,886 --> 00:22:27,721
Okay. That's uncalled for.

441
00:22:27,804 --> 00:22:30,557
Let me tell you something, Sammy--

442
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:31,516
Sandy.

443
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:32,851
Sandy?

444
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:35,354
There's nothing Sandy about you.

445
00:22:36,313 --> 00:22:40,150
My Martin has done very well for himself,
despite the fact

446
00:22:40,233 --> 00:22:42,194
that he's had to overcome many handicaps.

447
00:22:42,277 --> 00:22:43,653
Wait a minute. What handicaps?

448
00:22:43,737 --> 00:22:46,448
And if, at this point in his life,

449
00:22:46,531 --> 00:22:49,493
he has chosen your daughter
to settle down with--

450
00:22:49,576 --> 00:22:50,869
Settle down?

451
00:22:50,952 --> 00:22:52,954
He's an old man with a shitty ticker!

452
00:22:53,038 --> 00:22:54,873
He's down, lady, okay? He's down.

453
00:22:54,956 --> 00:22:56,166
Again, kinda hurtful.

454
00:22:56,249 --> 00:23:00,921
And if he's settling with your daughter,
she needs to buck up

455
00:23:01,004 --> 00:23:04,383
and stop being so goddamn sensitive
about her

456
00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:06,760
shape.

457
00:23:06,843 --> 00:23:08,220
Her… her shape?

458
00:23:08,804 --> 00:23:11,056
-I was trying to be polite.
-Hmm. [inhales]

459
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:13,350
-[exhales]
-[sighs]

460
00:23:14,351 --> 00:23:15,394
You poor bastard.

461
00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:17,437
You never had a chance.

462
00:23:19,064 --> 00:23:19,898
[sighs]

463
00:23:20,524 --> 00:23:21,900
[door opens, closes]

464
00:23:21,983 --> 00:23:23,652
So, that… that… that's Sandy.

465
00:23:26,822 --> 00:23:28,657
-Good night, Ma.
-[Estelle] Yeah.

466
00:23:29,157 --> 00:23:30,534
♪ You always hurt ♪

467
00:23:32,536 --> 00:23:33,870
♪ The one you love ♪

468
00:23:34,704 --> 00:23:35,705
♪ The one ♪

469
00:23:37,249 --> 00:23:41,628
♪ You shouldn't hurt at all ♪

470
00:23:42,879 --> 00:23:44,297
♪ You always take ♪

471
00:23:46,258 --> 00:23:47,717
♪ The sweetest rose ♪

472
00:23:48,927 --> 00:23:55,267
♪ Crush it till the petals fall ♪

473
00:23:55,350 --> 00:24:02,149
♪ You always break the kindest heart ♪

474
00:24:02,232 --> 00:24:04,109
♪ With a hasty word ♪

475
00:24:04,192 --> 00:24:09,448
♪ You can't recall, so ♪

476
00:24:10,407 --> 00:24:14,119
♪ If I broke your heart… ♪