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We had just gotten married.
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He called our pastor, okay?
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-He said...
-Come talk to this one.
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"what is wrong with her?
She has just lost her mind."
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he called the pastor.
I laid him out,
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laid the pastor out.
I mean, anybody got in
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-my way that day, okay?
-She did.
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We always find a resolve.
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Some... But some time
it takes a day...
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You know, by the end of
the night we're good, right?
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-Yeah...
-Yeah?
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But I learned to do
the "husband thing..."
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-what does that mean?
-When I come back...
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-The "husband thing"?
-Is...
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See, I'm still learning
these new things
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I don't say anything
and I listen to you.
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[theme music playing]
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[terri] they wanna know
how we met.
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-[charles] how we met, okay.
-That's quite a story.
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-Quite a story, okay.
-[laughs]
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I'll start it, okay?
I was... I was married, okay?
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And my beautiful wife
had cancer.
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And she subsequently
died of it.
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But before passing,
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she herself also
was an ordained minister.
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And she knew... And knew, uh,
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terri, who's also
an ordained minister.
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And they arranged for terri
to start coming over here
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to pray with ethel
during her time of illness.
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She said something
very interesting to me
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after one of our meetings.
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She said, "you know,
I'm really not afraid to die."
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she said, uh, 'cause I think
at that point you guys been
married 39 years, right?
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-Thirty nine years.
-Thirty nine years.
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And she said, "I've seen
my children
and my grandchildren."
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she said, "I'm not afraid."
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she said,
"my only concern is..."
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she said is "charles and I
have been together since..."
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-we were, what,
how old were you?
-She was 16 and I was 20.
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And 20... She said,
"we've been together
all our life."
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she says, and...
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"I'm not sure charles
will know how to live alone.
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I'm really concerned about
who he would end up with."
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she said, "because...
A lot of women would mistake
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his kindness for weakness."
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she said, "charles is
an extremely kind person."
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she says, "I just don't want
anybody to take advantage
of him"
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she said, "he's very..."
she kept, you know,
kind of, like,
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she says, "he'll do anything,
if he loves you, he will do
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anything for you."
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so one time I came over
right before she passed.
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And I came to the door,
and that's
the first interaction
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that you and I really had.
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-Mmm-hmm.
-Because you told me,
you said,
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"I'm giving ethel a bath
right now."
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he treated her
with such gentleness
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and kinda talked her
through it, you know,
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"honey, I've gotta move
you this way, I've gotta..."
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and I helped him, and I saw,
and then he picked her up,
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and he carried her into
the living room,
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and he said,
"you look like a queen today."
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you know, and I mean,
I was almost in tears
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because I just never,
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I... Then I understood
what she was saying about
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his level of kindness showing,
and compassion,
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and how much he loved her,
you know.
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That was, like, really,
really evident.
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I spent time with some
great mentors
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and watched how they
interacted with their wives.
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How...
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What sacrifice looked like
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because sometimes we think
sacrifice is so painful
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all the time, and it is not.
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Sometimes it's just saying,
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"wait a minute,
I'm just not gonna make me
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the number one priority
right now,
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I'm gonna make what she wants,
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or needs,
the greatest priority."
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if you learn to serve,
you're not gonna be
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disappointed if you believe
that's in the job description.
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-And it's not about...
It just wasn't about me.
-Mmm.
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Taking that serving attitude
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I think has been one of
the greatest components to
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us having success
even to this point.
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-[laughs]
-mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
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The thing that
I pride myself on
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is that I know her.
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[softly] he knows me.
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I've taken the time
to know her.
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[in normal voice] he is great
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at paying attention to details
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and it makes
a real difference.
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So the work for me is,
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is, if I love her
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then it has to be...
It has to be lived out.
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So the way that
I live it out is
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I try to get to know you so
I know what makes you tick,
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what sets you off
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and I try to love you the way
that you want to be loved.
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-Um...
-Yes.
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I try, I'm not perfect at it
by any stretch
of imagination but
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my growth for me was
that moment where
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I just recognized that she's
a completely different person.
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We don't think the same,
we are night and day
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on a lot of stuff.
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I'm always hot,
she's always cold.
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-Um...
-[laughs]
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-[softly] yes.
-Yeah.
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Dual climate in the car
was the best thing
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-they ever invented. Um...
-[deshun laughs]
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but for me,
the growth moment is
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recognizing and respecting
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and loving that
she's a different person
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and that it takes,
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it takes effort or energy
and work
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to learn to speak her language
to love her because
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it's not my default.
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-What I default to,
don't do it for her.
-Yes.
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I started to acknowledge
a little bit before
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when I was preparing to,
kind of be in a long-term
relationship
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that, um...
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I can have, like,
control issues sometimes.
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-[scoffs]
-um...
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I've really accepted that,
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that is an area of
growth for me.
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I've learned that
in this marriage
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as I have attempted again
to step back
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and the energy that that takes
for me to zip this thing up
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and allow him
to do those things
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that he does so wonderfully.
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So I've learned to,
you know, recognize
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and to be able
to articulate to him
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when I want to
take something over.
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Like my control,
when I wanna take it off,
I have to say,
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"oh, I wanna take that from
you right now, oh, I do but...
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Do it, okay, just do it."
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you know,
and I have to verbalize.
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We've learnt to have
a lot of humor
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about our faults.
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Before, marriage was
a fantasy.
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Like, "oh, this would be
great to do and to have."
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but that, kind of,
I'm truly... I've learnt,
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like I'm really committed
to this thing and to him.
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And I can't imagine my life
without him.
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And I'm not... I'm not
willing to let this go.
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My prior relationships
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were my greatest teacher
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coming in to this marriage.
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Because... Just because
you've had relationships
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that don't work,
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00:06:48,826 --> 00:06:52,577
it doesn't mean that there's
something wrong with you
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there may just be, perhaps,
areas where you need to grow.
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So you have a choice
when a relationship ends
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how you want to handle it.
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Whether it can be
a painful experience
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or powerful lesson
in your life.
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And repeatedly for me,
I chose that
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those relationships would be
a powerful lesson in my life.
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So I learned about service,
I learned about selflessness,
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I learned about compromise,
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I learned about
internal happiness
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and how it would come from me.
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I always tell him,
"you met me
at the perfect time."
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because I had grown
and I had evolved so much
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and I was ready, willing,
and capable
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to give the type of love
that I wanted to receive
from my husband.
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My wife, ethel, had
a mother and a brother
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that had suffered
severe, uh, strokes.
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So she said to me,
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"I don't wanna have a stroke,
if I do, then, you know"
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-I'm not, I don't--"
-"pray me outta here."
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-"I don't wanna be--"
-that's what she said,
"pray me outta here." right?
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So, she had a stroke
in the midst of everything
that was going on.
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But she didn't really know
that she had.
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By that time we had brought
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-a hospice situation
and everything.
-Yeah.
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So I said to her, "you're here
because of the stroke."
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00:08:07,738 --> 00:08:09,538
and when I said that,
her whole face,
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her whole demeanor changed.
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She says, "oh, no."
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00:08:12,576 --> 00:08:15,109
she's like, "I'm outta here."
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-but when I came over,
she was smiling, okay?
-Yeah. Mmm-hmm.
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I'm serious,
this woman was on morphine,
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she had cancer
that's spread everywhere,
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00:08:26,306 --> 00:08:29,724
and she had a stroke,
and she was smiling, okay?
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00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:31,459
And I mean,
I was in ministry and I still,
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00:08:31,562 --> 00:08:33,294
that was, like,
way over my head.
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And she said, uh,
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00:08:35,766 --> 00:08:36,798
"oh, that's easy."
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00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,132
she said, "that's easy."
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00:08:38,235 --> 00:08:42,303
she said, "I've had 39 years
with the best man
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00:08:42,406 --> 00:08:43,855
than any woman..."
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00:08:43,941 --> 00:08:45,473
no, she said,
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00:08:45,576 --> 00:08:48,076
"women wish they would
have one year
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00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:50,328
of what I've had
for 39 years."
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00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,913
she said, "I've seen
my children
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00:08:51,999 --> 00:08:53,698
and I've seen
my grandchildren."
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00:08:53,784 --> 00:08:56,167
she said, "and now
I'm going home.
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00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:58,503
-Promise me you'll take care
of my family."
-take care of my family.
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00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:00,755
"just take care of them
for me," you know.
201
00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:02,424
She said, 'cause, you know,
202
00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:04,926
and as soon as she passed,
her daughter,
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00:09:05,012 --> 00:09:08,046
-she just had a complete
walking nervous breakdown.
-Yeah, she did.
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00:09:08,131 --> 00:09:11,266
So we talked from time to time
until she finally
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00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:14,352
-began to come out of it.
-Mmm-hmm.
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00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:17,171
So, a year later,
it was my birthday.
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00:09:17,274 --> 00:09:18,523
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
208
00:09:18,642 --> 00:09:20,392
A year later it was her
birthday and my daughter
209
00:09:20,477 --> 00:09:22,343
that she just mentioned,
she said,
210
00:09:22,446 --> 00:09:25,179
"dad, you need to do something
nice for miss terri."
211
00:09:25,282 --> 00:09:28,733
I don't know if...
If I could ever,
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00:09:28,819 --> 00:09:31,736
if I could ever be with
someone who didn't,
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00:09:31,822 --> 00:09:33,238
you know, who didn't
really run off at the mouth.
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00:09:33,323 --> 00:09:35,607
You know
what I'm saying? Like...
215
00:09:35,709 --> 00:09:37,158
My daughter gave me
a list of things.
216
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:39,944
And on the list was
white gold hoop earrings.
217
00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:41,546
And so I said,
"I can do that."
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00:09:41,632 --> 00:09:43,081
you know, I buy jewelry
for my wife
219
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:44,249
all the time, I can do that.
220
00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:46,501
And, boy,
what did I do that for?
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00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:48,336
I bought those
white gold earrings
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00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,622
and so now I gotta figure out
a way to get them
to her, okay?
223
00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:51,673
So my daughter said,
224
00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,558
"well, take her
to lunch or something."
225
00:09:53,644 --> 00:09:56,061
anyway, I called her,
she's in...
226
00:09:56,146 --> 00:09:57,629
-Uh, atlanta.
-Atlanta. I was in atlanta.
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00:09:57,731 --> 00:09:58,730
She was in atlanta,
228
00:09:58,815 --> 00:10:00,965
ministering, preaching
somewhere in atlanta.
229
00:10:01,068 --> 00:10:02,851
She said she won't
be in town till Monday.
230
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,636
So I said, "okay, I'll pick
you up at the airport."
231
00:10:04,738 --> 00:10:06,938
she said, "no, no, no, no, no,
I don't need you
to pick me up."
232
00:10:07,024 --> 00:10:08,189
she kept going back and forth.
233
00:10:08,275 --> 00:10:09,474
I finally talked her
into letting me
234
00:10:09,576 --> 00:10:10,575
pick her up at the airport.
235
00:10:10,661 --> 00:10:11,943
So I picked her up
at the airport--
236
00:10:12,029 --> 00:10:14,079
and what you didn't know
237
00:10:14,164 --> 00:10:16,781
is that, that was
one of my things.
238
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:19,584
Being single, 'cause I've been
single for 25 years.
239
00:10:19,670 --> 00:10:22,153
I've been a widow and I raised
my two daughters
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00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:24,822
without my husband,
he also died of cancer.
241
00:10:24,925 --> 00:10:27,626
And, uh, the only thing
that ever bothered me
242
00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:29,094
about being single
243
00:10:29,179 --> 00:10:31,429
was coming back
through the airport
244
00:10:31,515 --> 00:10:33,131
and you would see people,
like, waiting,
245
00:10:33,216 --> 00:10:35,383
"oh, hey, welcome home!
Welcome home."
246
00:10:35,469 --> 00:10:37,636
and I'd always be
standing there, you know,
247
00:10:37,721 --> 00:10:40,505
and call a car, you know,
and go home.
248
00:10:40,607 --> 00:10:44,008
So he didn't know but
when he came to meet
me at the airport,
249
00:10:44,111 --> 00:10:46,611
it was like a thing
for me, you know,
250
00:10:46,697 --> 00:10:48,346
look at me, somebody's
251
00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:51,066
-picking me up at the airport.
-[laughs]
252
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:53,652
but I didn't say that,
I was cool.
253
00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:55,403
So I picked her up
at the airport.
254
00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:57,739
-I take her to berkley spa.
-And dropped me off.
255
00:10:57,824 --> 00:11:00,625
And I said, "listen,
I have a treatment package
256
00:11:00,711 --> 00:11:01,693
for you at berkley.
257
00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:03,912
Go in and take the treatment,
258
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,697
and then call me
when you're done."
259
00:11:05,799 --> 00:11:07,082
she says, "oh, oh, oh, okay."
260
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,500
-she says, "all right!"
-[laughs]
261
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:10,919
she goes in berkley
and about 30 minutes later
262
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:12,036
she comes calling me.
263
00:11:12,139 --> 00:11:14,005
She says, "I'm done."
I said, "done with what?"
264
00:11:14,091 --> 00:11:15,840
she said,
"well, I got a facial."
265
00:11:15,926 --> 00:11:18,376
-I said, "no, no, you gotta--"
-I got a massage.
266
00:11:18,478 --> 00:11:21,012
-A 30 minute massage.
-Whatever you got.
I said, "no, no, you gotta
267
00:11:21,098 --> 00:11:22,931
full package,
go back in there--
268
00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:24,849
you gotta go in
and use everything
that's in that
269
00:11:24,935 --> 00:11:26,651
package, okay?"
she said, "really?"
270
00:11:26,737 --> 00:11:28,153
I said, "yeah."
271
00:11:28,238 --> 00:11:30,689
I said, "you better go back in
there and use that thing."
272
00:11:30,774 --> 00:11:33,274
-she said, "okay."
-I didn't know, okay?
273
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:34,943
I wasn't a spa person.
274
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:36,394
[both laugh]
275
00:11:36,496 --> 00:11:39,864
so a couple hours later
she calls, she says, "wow!"
276
00:11:39,950 --> 00:11:41,232
[both laugh]
277
00:11:41,334 --> 00:11:42,534
so I pick her up and we go
278
00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:44,369
to get something
to eat after that.
279
00:11:44,454 --> 00:11:47,205
-So we went to the restaurant
in santa monica.
-And then I told you
280
00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:48,506
in that restaurant I said,
281
00:11:48,592 --> 00:11:50,625
"you know what, I'm just gonna
be straight with you.
282
00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:53,545
If I don't go on another date
for another 20 years
283
00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:56,047
this is the one."
okay? [laughs]
284
00:11:56,133 --> 00:11:57,849
I said, "everything would else
285
00:11:57,934 --> 00:12:00,301
have to measure up
to this one, okay?"
286
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:01,970
there's probably not
a day that's gone by
287
00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,588
that I haven't laughed.
288
00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:08,143
And even in my mad moments,
I've still laughed.
289
00:12:08,729 --> 00:12:09,978
[zena laughs]
290
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:11,596
-I make you happy?
-You do.
291
00:12:11,698 --> 00:12:13,648
-[softly] yay!
-[laughs]
292
00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:17,869
um, it's just something
about her that
293
00:12:19,122 --> 00:12:20,789
never gets old to me.
294
00:12:21,541 --> 00:12:22,490
And...
295
00:12:23,293 --> 00:12:26,578
You know, I could go through
a list of things
296
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,379
from... From her beauty...
297
00:12:28,465 --> 00:12:30,749
From her sassy attitude...
298
00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:34,169
To her, you know,
her organization skills...
299
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:36,838
To her style,
her way with, with...
300
00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:40,508
With the household,
with the kids, with me.
301
00:12:40,594 --> 00:12:42,393
Um...
302
00:12:42,479 --> 00:12:46,014
The way she is about that,
the woman that she is
303
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:48,683
for me, it just,
it never gets old to me.
304
00:12:48,769 --> 00:12:50,968
It never, like, you know,
she would just,
305
00:12:51,071 --> 00:12:52,470
you know,
she would just be walking by
306
00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,405
you know, still gotta touch
on her or something, just...
307
00:12:54,491 --> 00:12:55,857
-[laughs]
-...Grab her butt.
308
00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:57,408
She'll be like,
"you're such a pervert."
309
00:12:57,494 --> 00:12:59,077
"I just like it,"
you know what I mean?
310
00:12:59,162 --> 00:13:01,079
It's just something
about it and...
311
00:13:01,164 --> 00:13:03,581
And... And her energy,
312
00:13:03,667 --> 00:13:09,320
um, her spicy energy is...
Is fun.
313
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:12,824
I don't know if...
If I could ever...
314
00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:15,760
If I could ever be with
someone who didn't,
315
00:13:15,846 --> 00:13:17,796
you know, who didn't
really run off at the mouth.
316
00:13:17,881 --> 00:13:18,963
You know
what I'm saying? Like...
317
00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:21,049
Who didn't really, like,
318
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:22,667
-who didn't--
-and tank always says
I'm a kid.
319
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:23,968
He's like,
"you're such a kid."
320
00:13:24,054 --> 00:13:25,770
'cause I be joking
all the time.
321
00:13:25,856 --> 00:13:28,473
She just be going
and she just randomly like,
digging my nose.
322
00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:30,391
I'm like, "what are you doing?
I wanna sleep!"
323
00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:32,644
-and try to put it in my mouth
-I like to play.
324
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:35,814
I'm like, "what are you doing?
You can't do that."
325
00:13:35,899 --> 00:13:37,949
-I'm a grown woman
but I like to play.
-[laughing]
326
00:13:38,034 --> 00:13:39,651
people laugh
all the time 'cause
327
00:13:39,736 --> 00:13:41,069
we play video games
together, like...
328
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,020
When he met me,
I was playing halo
329
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:44,021
and doing all these things
330
00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:45,490
and he was like,
"you play halo?"
331
00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:47,692
-yeah I play halo,
I play halo.
-It's very sexy by the way.
332
00:13:47,794 --> 00:13:49,327
-He would be at practice--
-just wanted to say.
333
00:13:49,412 --> 00:13:50,829
And he'd come home
and I'd be like,
334
00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:52,247
"get some!" like, yelling at
335
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:53,832
-some six-year-old on the--
-she'd be online
336
00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:55,032
-with the headset on...
-[laughs]
337
00:13:55,135 --> 00:13:56,033
controller in her hand,
338
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:57,752
like, annihilating these
339
00:13:57,838 --> 00:13:59,420
people online and I'm like...
340
00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:03,374
-"this is sexy!" I'm like...
-[laughs]
341
00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:06,261
this is... This a whole
another level of--
342
00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:08,479
but that's what, you have
to find something in
common because...
343
00:14:08,565 --> 00:14:09,647
I'm so aroused right now.
344
00:14:09,733 --> 00:14:12,433
If I didn't like video games
and he liked video games
345
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:14,686
as much as we play together,
if he was just doing that
346
00:14:14,771 --> 00:14:16,571
by himself,
I would be so annoyed.
347
00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:19,107
I needed someone
348
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:21,943
-who can roll with me.
-Yeah.
349
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,494
Whatever that is for anybody.
350
00:14:23,580 --> 00:14:26,497
-Whatever that means to you
in your relationship.
-Yeah.
351
00:14:26,583 --> 00:14:28,900
You need somebody
who can roll with you.
352
00:14:29,002 --> 00:14:30,118
And vice versa.
353
00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,003
Communication is
very important.
354
00:14:32,706 --> 00:14:35,540
However, you can't go
355
00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:38,009
-and force it, right?
-Mmm-mmm.
356
00:14:38,094 --> 00:14:40,411
-"no, we gonna talk,
we gonna talk, now!"
-mmm-mmm.
357
00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:42,347
Or "we gonna talk
in this environment."
358
00:14:42,432 --> 00:14:46,517
-or "we gonna talk under
these circumstances."
-the old me.
359
00:14:46,603 --> 00:14:48,019
I would have to say the key
to our marriage
360
00:14:48,104 --> 00:14:49,304
is communication.
361
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:51,756
-Period. No cliche.
-Open communication,
all the time.
362
00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:53,758
And he might
get irritated with me
363
00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:55,727
'cause I like
to communicate a lot.
364
00:14:55,812 --> 00:14:57,028
[laughs]
365
00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:59,364
but I really feel like that's
how we've made it this far.
366
00:14:59,449 --> 00:15:01,900
That's how we've made it
20 years.
367
00:15:01,985 --> 00:15:03,651
-Yeah.
-Between friendship
368
00:15:03,737 --> 00:15:05,436
and being together
and breaking up
369
00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:08,039
and being back together
and marriage and kids.
370
00:15:08,909 --> 00:15:10,708
It's always
been communication.
371
00:15:10,794 --> 00:15:12,911
-Yeah. We like, we--
-I'mma talk...
I like to talk things out.
372
00:15:12,996 --> 00:15:15,079
-Oh yeah. She, she--
-he be so irritated.
373
00:15:15,165 --> 00:15:17,715
Yeah, she doesn't...
She do like
374
00:15:17,801 --> 00:15:20,468
eighty sets of jaw lifts.
375
00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:23,120
-[both laugh]
-shut up.
376
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:24,339
Oh, she gonna talk.
377
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,890
[both laugh]
378
00:15:25,976 --> 00:15:27,592
um...
379
00:15:27,677 --> 00:15:30,461
And I think, you know,
us learning each other
380
00:15:30,563 --> 00:15:33,297
in that... In that space
of communication like,
381
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,433
she has to communicate now.
382
00:15:35,518 --> 00:15:37,101
-She gotta get it out now.
-Yeah, I can't wait.
383
00:15:37,187 --> 00:15:38,970
If something bothers me,
I gotta say it.
384
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:41,439
She gotta get it
off her chest.
385
00:15:41,524 --> 00:15:43,441
You know what I mean?
And depending on what it is,
386
00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:45,142
what type of situation it is,
387
00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:46,577
-for me--
-that is one thing that I have
388
00:15:46,663 --> 00:15:48,112
learnt in marriage,
I will say that
389
00:15:48,198 --> 00:15:49,647
I'm trying to get
better about that.
390
00:15:49,749 --> 00:15:50,949
Yeah, I like to--
391
00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:54,485
-is that a "yeah, I am" or...
-Yeah, you are. Um...
392
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:57,038
-I remember one particular
time that we disagreed...
-Yeah.
393
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:58,172
[clears throat]
394
00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,925
and I think this was earlier
in our relationship.
395
00:16:01,011 --> 00:16:03,878
We had a big argument
and he left.
396
00:16:03,964 --> 00:16:06,881
I was like, "oh no, you're not
gonna leave this argument.
397
00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,766
-We gonna talk this out."
-[laughs]
398
00:16:08,852 --> 00:16:11,769
-I followed him two blocks...
-[laughs]
399
00:16:11,855 --> 00:16:13,972
and he called my mother.
400
00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:15,940
-I called her mom.
-He called my mom!
401
00:16:16,026 --> 00:16:17,892
"can you tell your daughter
402
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:19,360
-to go back in the house?"
-[laughs]
403
00:16:20,313 --> 00:16:22,981
we in the street, okay,
mind you and I'm--
404
00:16:23,066 --> 00:16:25,616
"you bring your butt--"
you know, I just was like,
405
00:16:25,702 --> 00:16:27,452
and my mom said,
406
00:16:27,537 --> 00:16:29,737
he handed the phone
to me and my mom said,
407
00:16:29,823 --> 00:16:31,823
"led, go home."
408
00:16:31,908 --> 00:16:34,792
and then all of a sudden,
this big,
409
00:16:34,878 --> 00:16:36,694
I just felt,
I felt like a big pain,
410
00:16:36,796 --> 00:16:38,496
like my heart was breaking.
411
00:16:38,581 --> 00:16:42,467
And I said, "but he...
He may not come back."
412
00:16:42,552 --> 00:16:43,584
mmm.
413
00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:46,137
And he turned around
and he heard it
414
00:16:46,723 --> 00:16:48,006
and I just start crying.
415
00:16:48,091 --> 00:16:50,041
I'm getting emotional, jesus.
416
00:16:50,143 --> 00:16:51,976
And my mom said,
417
00:16:52,062 --> 00:16:53,761
"led, go, just go home."
418
00:16:53,847 --> 00:16:55,980
and he looked at me, like...
It's like he...
419
00:16:56,066 --> 00:16:58,066
Something clicked for him,
and he said,
420
00:16:58,518 --> 00:16:59,517
he said,
421
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:02,386
"I'm gonna come back,
I just need a minute."
422
00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:04,939
so I said,
"okay, I'mma go back home."
423
00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:07,608
but I was still mad,
but I'm just saying
424
00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:10,111
when he said,
"I'm gonna come back."
425
00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:13,865
that's when I was like,
okay, that...
426
00:17:13,950 --> 00:17:17,068
We can disagree,
it's okay to disagree...
427
00:17:17,153 --> 00:17:19,353
-Why am I bawling?
-Want me to get you a tissue?
428
00:17:19,456 --> 00:17:20,922
It's okay to disagree
429
00:17:22,592 --> 00:17:24,008
and it won't break us.
430
00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:26,210
-You know, we can...
-Mmm-hmm.
431
00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:28,296
I can be different
and not agree with him
432
00:17:28,882 --> 00:17:30,131
and it won't end this.
433
00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:33,584
So that was... That was
a learning moment for me
434
00:17:33,686 --> 00:17:36,687
-and, where I...
I didn't have to change...
-Yeah.
435
00:17:36,773 --> 00:17:40,191
...Myself to be in
a relationship with someone.
436
00:17:40,276 --> 00:17:42,760
We are definitely a open book.
437
00:17:42,862 --> 00:17:46,064
In this house,
everything is open.
438
00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:48,766
-Yeah.
-You know,
I like it to be that way.
439
00:17:48,868 --> 00:17:49,901
I want no surprises.
440
00:17:49,986 --> 00:17:51,435
Like... Let's talk about it,
441
00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:52,487
how we feeling.
442
00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:55,490
But I know my husband
and, like, he knows me.
443
00:17:55,592 --> 00:17:58,409
If he get too quiet,
I know he ain't settled
with something.
444
00:17:59,295 --> 00:18:01,445
But now I know to wait
445
00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:04,082
-for him to talk about it.
-That is like
446
00:18:04,167 --> 00:18:05,950
the blessing in all of this.
447
00:18:06,052 --> 00:18:08,052
Like learning how to
448
00:18:08,838 --> 00:18:09,954
be patient, like,
449
00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:11,556
because you hear
a lot of times when they say,
450
00:18:11,641 --> 00:18:13,925
"what is the key
to a successful marriage?"
451
00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:15,676
and the first thing,
"communication."
452
00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:18,262
-it's the patience
to communicate.
-But it's... Yeah!
453
00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:19,597
-It is... Yeah...
-[laughs]
454
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,482
communication is
very important.
455
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,569
However, you can't go
456
00:18:24,654 --> 00:18:26,604
-and force it, right?
-Mmm-mmm.
457
00:18:26,689 --> 00:18:29,306
-"now, we gonna talk,
we gonna talk, now!"
-mmm-mmm.
458
00:18:29,409 --> 00:18:31,275
Or "we gonna talk
in this environment."
459
00:18:31,361 --> 00:18:34,328
-or "we gonna talk under
these circumstances."
-the old me.
460
00:18:35,331 --> 00:18:38,149
-Yeah.
-I think that that is a very
461
00:18:38,251 --> 00:18:41,619
important part
that we often times leave out.
462
00:18:41,704 --> 00:18:43,921
You can say and do things
that you can't come back from.
463
00:18:44,541 --> 00:18:45,873
You know what I mean? And...
464
00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:49,460
She goes to such a hot place,
465
00:18:49,546 --> 00:18:52,046
we both can't be hot
at the same time.
466
00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:54,715
You know what I'm saying?
We have to-- there has to be
467
00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:56,050
this, you know
what I'm saying?
468
00:18:56,136 --> 00:18:58,936
And then maybe at some point
I can get a little bit
469
00:18:59,022 --> 00:19:00,638
down here, maybe?
470
00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:03,007
But you know, um,
471
00:19:03,109 --> 00:19:05,676
we're learning that,
and she's becoming more,
472
00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:06,944
um...
473
00:19:07,947 --> 00:19:10,314
Um, more understanding
and letting me just have
474
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:11,899
just a little space
475
00:19:12,569 --> 00:19:13,651
to gather my thoughts.
476
00:19:13,736 --> 00:19:15,286
You know what I mean?
And gather my words
477
00:19:15,371 --> 00:19:17,455
and then she's becoming
better about
478
00:19:17,540 --> 00:19:20,908
not just blurting
her words out.
479
00:19:21,794 --> 00:19:24,328
-Which are very--
-very what?
480
00:19:25,248 --> 00:19:27,415
-Aggressive.
-[both laugh]
481
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:32,336
-but it comes
from a good place.
-Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
482
00:19:32,422 --> 00:19:33,804
-[laughs]
-yeah, yeah.
483
00:19:33,890 --> 00:19:35,673
It comes from the heart.
484
00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:38,643
-I got a smart mouth.
That's the problem.
-[both laughing]
485
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:42,980
usually I go on,
what I called a "thought path"
486
00:19:43,066 --> 00:19:44,182
that I walk out
487
00:19:44,267 --> 00:19:45,683
and it's usually
the same route.
488
00:19:45,768 --> 00:19:48,819
I'll walk around the corner,
go here, go there
489
00:19:48,905 --> 00:19:49,720
and thinking.
490
00:19:49,822 --> 00:19:51,388
And a lot of times
I'm out there
491
00:19:51,491 --> 00:19:53,274
saying all the stuff
that I can't say to you.
492
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:54,275
[both laugh]
493
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:55,660
that's why I can't
have her following me.
494
00:19:55,745 --> 00:19:57,995
That's what he was explaining,
"I need that time."
495
00:19:58,081 --> 00:20:00,031
so I need to go
say all of these things
496
00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:01,999
out loud or think it through
497
00:20:02,085 --> 00:20:04,869
and then I say,
"you know, I'm glad
I didn't say this.
498
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:07,538
This was kinda wrong
that I did do this.
499
00:20:07,624 --> 00:20:09,740
Maybe I overreacted on that."
500
00:20:09,842 --> 00:20:11,709
and then I can come
back to her
501
00:20:11,794 --> 00:20:14,295
without me just going,
you know, you're just
502
00:20:14,380 --> 00:20:16,180
going off the rails
and no one gets hurt.
503
00:20:16,266 --> 00:20:18,549
So, I'm more of that,
you know,
504
00:20:18,635 --> 00:20:20,468
I sit back and try to do that.
505
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,387
Then once she got that,
she'll let me do that.
506
00:20:23,473 --> 00:20:25,723
And it's usually one of us
507
00:20:25,808 --> 00:20:27,424
-texting each other, like...
-Yeah.
508
00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,527
And that's when you know...
"hey, you hungry?"
509
00:20:29,612 --> 00:20:31,696
-[both laugh]
-everyone laughs at us.
510
00:20:31,781 --> 00:20:33,231
I'm like-- [growls]
511
00:20:33,316 --> 00:20:35,366
-you hungry?
You want something to eat?
-You hungry? We do that
512
00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:36,867
"I just made this,
I just had..."
513
00:20:36,953 --> 00:20:39,203
and that's...
That was how, um...
514
00:20:39,289 --> 00:20:41,489
-We were learning how to...
-...Growing in the marriage.
515
00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:43,207
-Marriage.
-And in the relationship.
516
00:20:43,293 --> 00:20:45,159
She'll tell you right now,
whenever we get into
517
00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:47,712
a discussion, a debate or...
518
00:20:48,548 --> 00:20:50,047
-A argument.
-A argument.
519
00:20:50,133 --> 00:20:51,666
-[both laugh]
-okay. Okay.
520
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:55,119
She'll tell you, I'm like
a water off a duck's back.
521
00:20:55,221 --> 00:20:56,504
I don't let it stick with me.
522
00:20:56,589 --> 00:20:58,055
Okay. And...
Whenever there's a...
523
00:20:58,141 --> 00:20:59,724
Like if we were planning to do
something earlier
524
00:20:59,809 --> 00:21:01,092
and an argument, some come up,
525
00:21:01,177 --> 00:21:02,393
after it's over, I say,
526
00:21:02,478 --> 00:21:04,295
"okay, baby, I'm sorry.
Let's go do whatever,
whatever.
527
00:21:04,397 --> 00:21:05,396
Okay, let's go to the movie."
528
00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:08,015
and I go with him,
I don't hold grudges either.
529
00:21:08,101 --> 00:21:10,067
-That has been
our saving grace.
-Yeah.
530
00:21:10,153 --> 00:21:13,237
You know what,
we can have
a knockdown drag out,
531
00:21:13,323 --> 00:21:15,940
you know, you can hear us
down the street, okay?
532
00:21:16,025 --> 00:21:18,526
And afterwards,
"okay, we still going
to the movies?"
533
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:20,528
-I say, "yeah, I've been dying
to see that picture."
-yeah.
534
00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:22,580
-You know, like, you know.
We know...
-Like, it's over.
535
00:21:22,665 --> 00:21:23,614
It's always over.
536
00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:25,283
We let it go because
537
00:21:25,368 --> 00:21:27,868
-I'm just too old to be,
you know...
-Yeah.
538
00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:29,587
...Spending my time being
mad at somebody.
539
00:21:29,672 --> 00:21:30,788
It takes too much energy!
540
00:21:30,873 --> 00:21:32,256
-So it does.
-Yeah. Yeah.
541
00:21:32,342 --> 00:21:34,825
"I don't know what you talking
about. You're fine looking."
542
00:21:34,927 --> 00:21:36,877
-that's right.
-[both laugh]
543
00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:39,263
-yeah. Yeah.
-She's my sweet-tea, huh.
544
00:21:39,349 --> 00:21:41,048
We can't connect as a couple
545
00:21:41,134 --> 00:21:43,267
-if there's a baby
in between us.
-Oh, I could have
546
00:21:43,353 --> 00:21:45,720
but you didn't wanna
connect as a couple.
547
00:21:45,805 --> 00:21:47,938
-I cannot connect as a couple.
-[laughing] I was...
548
00:21:48,024 --> 00:21:49,223
I was ready to connect.
549
00:21:49,309 --> 00:21:53,427
-If there is a baby
in the bed with us.
-[both laugh]
550
00:21:53,546 --> 00:21:55,680
when you reach a certain age,
551
00:21:55,765 --> 00:21:57,264
that you're not going
to get married.
552
00:21:57,383 --> 00:21:59,016
-You're not going
to find romance.
-Yeah.
553
00:21:59,102 --> 00:22:00,384
You're not going to have...
554
00:22:00,470 --> 00:22:03,771
-And I'm a witness, okay,
to the universe.
-Yeah.
555
00:22:03,890 --> 00:22:07,892
-That I was 61
and you were 60?
-I was 60, I was 60. Yeah.
556
00:22:07,977 --> 00:22:10,277
-About to be 61.
-Okay.
557
00:22:10,396 --> 00:22:13,731
And... It was like I was 19.
558
00:22:13,816 --> 00:22:16,450
Okay. Even our sex life
was like,
559
00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:17,785
kids, okay.
560
00:22:17,904 --> 00:22:19,787
-It was good, it was good.
-It was... Let me tell you,
561
00:22:19,906 --> 00:22:22,289
it was nothing like...
562
00:22:22,408 --> 00:22:25,793
-You know, whenever you talk
about god redeeming the time.
-Yeah.
563
00:22:25,912 --> 00:22:29,080
Okay, that you know,
you think, well, you know,
564
00:22:29,165 --> 00:22:31,882
if I get... Get to this age
and I can make...
565
00:22:31,968 --> 00:22:33,450
The only thing that,
that I would say,
566
00:22:33,553 --> 00:22:36,470
if you were marrying
later in life is that,
567
00:22:36,589 --> 00:22:37,955
you're not, you know...
568
00:22:38,057 --> 00:22:41,642
-Hey, at a certain point
you're not going to have kids.
-Right. Right.
569
00:22:41,761 --> 00:22:43,761
Oh, thank god... We're done.
570
00:22:43,846 --> 00:22:46,296
[laughing] thank god,
we're done.
571
00:22:46,399 --> 00:22:47,598
You know.
572
00:22:47,683 --> 00:22:49,600
We can't do what we was doing,
we're 70.
573
00:22:49,685 --> 00:22:51,652
-Have kids y'all, okay.
-Right.
574
00:22:51,771 --> 00:22:54,805
We're big on prioritizing
couple time and people...
575
00:22:54,907 --> 00:22:57,307
We did not let our son
take over our life.
576
00:22:57,410 --> 00:23:00,477
He is a part of our life
that we love and adore
577
00:23:00,580 --> 00:23:03,614
but he is not the whole...
Kit and caboodle.
578
00:23:03,699 --> 00:23:05,616
We transitioned him
into his own bed.
579
00:23:05,701 --> 00:23:07,985
So, that to me,
was a big part of it.
580
00:23:08,087 --> 00:23:11,321
I was like, we can't connect
as a couple if there
was a baby in between us.
581
00:23:11,424 --> 00:23:14,592
Oh, I could have,
but you didn't want
to connect as a couple.
582
00:23:14,677 --> 00:23:16,293
-I cannot connect as a couple.
-[laughs]
583
00:23:16,379 --> 00:23:17,678
I was... I was ready
to connect. [laughs]
584
00:23:17,797 --> 00:23:21,015
-if there was a baby
in the bed with us.
-[both laugh]
585
00:23:21,134 --> 00:23:23,184
so... That, that was my thing.
586
00:23:23,302 --> 00:23:26,003
I'm like, we need to create
boundaries between
our child and us.
587
00:23:26,105 --> 00:23:27,772
And he is now two-and-a-half.
588
00:23:27,857 --> 00:23:30,608
And he knows that's
mommy and daddy's room
and this is my room.
589
00:23:30,693 --> 00:23:33,844
And I sleep here
and they sleep there. Um...
590
00:23:33,946 --> 00:23:36,313
And we go on vacations,
we utilize our help.
591
00:23:36,399 --> 00:23:38,949
-Um... So we prioritize us.
-Yeah. We date, we date.
592
00:23:39,035 --> 00:23:42,820
Cj is like a part of
our life in a way that
593
00:23:42,905 --> 00:23:45,372
I don't feel like I'm not
dating you if he is there
like, it's just like,
594
00:23:45,491 --> 00:23:47,958
have that family time.
I could be just as...
595
00:23:48,044 --> 00:23:50,795
I want to go crazy. I'll be
just as turned on with you
596
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:53,380
half-naked as you are when
you're just holding your son,
597
00:23:53,499 --> 00:23:54,882
looking at this woman
because I was like,
598
00:23:55,001 --> 00:23:56,867
"that's my wife.
Girl, you look good."
599
00:23:56,969 --> 00:23:59,470
you know what I'm saying?
So, I was like, it...
600
00:23:59,555 --> 00:24:02,039
-It kind of just all
works together.
-Mmm-hmm.
601
00:24:02,141 --> 00:24:03,974
There are things
that they see.
602
00:24:04,060 --> 00:24:05,876
You know like, we kiss.
603
00:24:05,978 --> 00:24:08,229
They're disgusted by it now.
604
00:24:08,347 --> 00:24:11,215
-[chuckling]
-but later on, they're...
605
00:24:11,317 --> 00:24:12,850
They're gonna know if they're
in a relationship like,
606
00:24:12,935 --> 00:24:14,735
"oh, this dude doesn't
want to even kiss me
607
00:24:14,854 --> 00:24:16,553
or he doesn't want
to hold my hand."
608
00:24:16,656 --> 00:24:19,389
we've never stopped kissing.
We've never stopped
holding hands.
609
00:24:19,492 --> 00:24:22,026
And, um...
We're very respectful.
610
00:24:22,111 --> 00:24:24,245
We don't curse at each other.
611
00:24:24,363 --> 00:24:28,232
And I... I try and model it
more than I try to...
612
00:24:28,334 --> 00:24:31,335
Come on, I mean, I used to
curse you out back in the day.
I don't do that anymore.
613
00:24:31,420 --> 00:24:33,237
-Yeah, we'll see.
-I do not.
614
00:24:33,339 --> 00:24:36,040
-You don't know
what I was laughing at.
-Oh, okay. Let's see.
615
00:24:36,125 --> 00:24:39,093
-[laughs]
-staying in. Um...
616
00:24:40,463 --> 00:24:43,764
But I do try and model
the behavior. I don't talk
617
00:24:43,883 --> 00:24:45,516
as much about it as he does.
618
00:24:45,601 --> 00:24:48,085
You know, I think, that's
like mother-father thing.
619
00:24:48,187 --> 00:24:50,420
But I do, um...
620
00:24:50,523 --> 00:24:54,558
I model... I try to model
the behavior and they
also see,
621
00:24:54,644 --> 00:24:57,528
you know, our little
disagreements and that we've,
622
00:24:57,613 --> 00:25:01,115
you know, get past them
and work them out.
623
00:25:01,234 --> 00:25:04,952
Um... And sometimes they don't
even know that it happened.
They saw
624
00:25:05,071 --> 00:25:06,770
the disagreement.
And then suddenly like,
625
00:25:06,873 --> 00:25:08,572
we are on the couch
watching a movie,
holding hands.
626
00:25:08,658 --> 00:25:10,741
And they're like,
"wait a minute,
they were just like
627
00:25:10,826 --> 00:25:12,293
not having a good time."
628
00:25:12,828 --> 00:25:14,044
but...
629
00:25:14,130 --> 00:25:15,246
You know, they see it.
630
00:25:15,331 --> 00:25:18,048
I've had the conversation
indirectly like, with my girl.
631
00:25:18,134 --> 00:25:19,466
I said, listen,
632
00:25:19,585 --> 00:25:22,953
"don't look for nobody to do
what you do for you like
I do for you.
633
00:25:23,055 --> 00:25:25,723
But what you should look for
634
00:25:25,808 --> 00:25:29,176
is you... You've...
You see the way
I treat your mother?
635
00:25:30,596 --> 00:25:32,229
Look for somebody
to respect you."
636
00:25:32,315 --> 00:25:33,981
I told her, I said,
"you're not going to...
Nobody...
637
00:25:34,100 --> 00:25:35,966
You'll never find a better
lover better than I do."
638
00:25:36,068 --> 00:25:39,636
-I said that to you.
-Well, you know,
I said it back.
639
00:25:39,739 --> 00:25:41,989
You know, um...
640
00:25:42,108 --> 00:25:44,742
It'll, you know, it'll only
be different.
641
00:25:44,827 --> 00:25:46,827
But it doesn't
get better than this.
642
00:25:46,946 --> 00:25:48,746
But you know, uh...
643
00:25:48,831 --> 00:25:53,083
It's just, you know,
mutual respect is...Monstrous.
644
00:25:53,169 --> 00:25:55,336
It's... It's, it's essential.
645
00:25:55,454 --> 00:25:58,155
I was like,
"what's going on, babe?"
and she was like,
646
00:25:58,257 --> 00:26:00,824
"you know, I just want
someone else on me."
647
00:26:00,927 --> 00:26:01,842
[laughs]
648
00:26:01,961 --> 00:26:03,994
-and I was like, uh...
-It had been...
649
00:26:04,096 --> 00:26:05,329
I'm driving. I'm like...
650
00:26:05,431 --> 00:26:08,148
He was like, "what?"
651
00:26:08,267 --> 00:26:09,900
I'll tell you, we had
a moment, we were driving.
652
00:26:09,986 --> 00:26:11,435
And she was like, ugh...
653
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,772
And I was like,
"what's going on, babe?"
and she was like,
654
00:26:14,857 --> 00:26:17,408
"you know, I just want
someone else on me."
655
00:26:17,493 --> 00:26:18,409
[laughs]
656
00:26:18,494 --> 00:26:20,477
-and I was like, uh...
-It had been...
657
00:26:20,580 --> 00:26:21,745
I'm driving. I'm like...
658
00:26:21,831 --> 00:26:23,581
He was like, "what?"
659
00:26:23,666 --> 00:26:24,949
what? Excuse me.
660
00:26:25,034 --> 00:26:26,951
I was like, "what do you mean,
you just want
661
00:26:27,036 --> 00:26:28,252
-somebody else on--"
-you know,
662
00:26:28,337 --> 00:26:30,087
it looked, she was
in her own world.
She was just like--
663
00:26:30,172 --> 00:26:31,672
I was just staring
out the window
664
00:26:31,791 --> 00:26:33,457
and I didn't mean
exactly that.
665
00:26:33,542 --> 00:26:35,009
What I meant was,
666
00:26:35,127 --> 00:26:36,427
we had been
in a relationship for...
667
00:26:36,512 --> 00:26:38,328
-A long time.
-Probably ten years by then.
668
00:26:38,431 --> 00:26:39,930
-No, it was like,
seven years.
-May be seven...
669
00:26:40,016 --> 00:26:42,266
Seven-year itch.
You know what they say. And...
670
00:26:43,552 --> 00:26:46,971
You know, I had missed,
like, you miss when you
get married
671
00:26:47,056 --> 00:26:50,340
that moment that you guys
meet for the first time
672
00:26:50,443 --> 00:26:53,777
and he walks you to your door
and you're like, "oh,
are we gonna...
673
00:26:53,863 --> 00:26:55,512
Is it gonna be a thing?
Is it not gonna be?"
674
00:26:55,615 --> 00:26:58,315
the butterflies,
all those things when
you're dating people.
675
00:26:58,401 --> 00:27:01,151
The spontaneity,
all those little things.
676
00:27:01,237 --> 00:27:02,786
And, I had just gotten
to a point
677
00:27:02,872 --> 00:27:04,204
where I was like,
"oh, I'm never
678
00:27:04,323 --> 00:27:05,856
gonna have a first kiss
again with someone.
679
00:27:05,958 --> 00:27:08,993
I'm never gonna get that like,
anxious feeling again
680
00:27:09,078 --> 00:27:11,378
when you're first dating
someone and you
don't know where it's going."
681
00:27:11,497 --> 00:27:14,965
and it was more like
a realization of all of
that stuff
682
00:27:15,051 --> 00:27:17,301
and I was like, "oh, god,
I'm going to have
to let that go, like,
683
00:27:17,386 --> 00:27:19,003
those butterfly feelings."
684
00:27:19,088 --> 00:27:21,204
and you have butterflies
when you're are married for
a long time but it's just--
685
00:27:21,307 --> 00:27:22,806
-they're different butterfly.
-It's different,
it's different.
686
00:27:22,892 --> 00:27:24,207
They're not real butterflies.
They--
687
00:27:24,310 --> 00:27:26,510
they're like moths.
They're like moths.
688
00:27:26,595 --> 00:27:28,679
They don't, they don't got
pretty colors no more,
689
00:27:28,764 --> 00:27:31,148
-they just beige.
-They are those grey ones,
that like,
690
00:27:31,233 --> 00:27:32,349
flutter towards
the light and--
691
00:27:32,435 --> 00:27:34,151
they just beige
and maybe got a hole
in the wing.
692
00:27:34,236 --> 00:27:35,235
[laughs]
693
00:27:35,354 --> 00:27:37,220
-it is like--
-they're still
in there though.
694
00:27:37,323 --> 00:27:38,689
But, yeah,
it's just different.
695
00:27:38,774 --> 00:27:40,891
You evolve into this different
type of relationship
696
00:27:40,993 --> 00:27:42,893
when you've been
with someone for so long.
697
00:27:42,995 --> 00:27:46,229
And, you know, you do
everything you can to keep
698
00:27:46,332 --> 00:27:48,082
the spark alive and you do.
699
00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:50,233
And our relationship
is amazing, like, we're great.
700
00:27:50,336 --> 00:27:52,369
But you just have
those moments every while
when you're like...
701
00:27:52,455 --> 00:27:54,588
-It flows.
-It's you face again.
702
00:27:54,707 --> 00:27:56,256
It's your face, again.
703
00:27:56,375 --> 00:27:58,926
I hope that other couples
can talk about the stuff
we talk about,
704
00:27:59,045 --> 00:28:01,078
-we talk about everything.
-Everything.
705
00:28:01,180 --> 00:28:03,097
-[laughs]
-I'll be like, "hey, man,
706
00:28:03,215 --> 00:28:04,715
you could give me a heads up?"
707
00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:07,250
-I'll be like banging it.
I got to--
-that's pretty graphic.
708
00:28:07,353 --> 00:28:09,770
-[laughing]
-like, like, you know, but...
709
00:28:09,889 --> 00:28:12,422
After... After being
disgusted or, you know,
710
00:28:12,525 --> 00:28:14,758
whatever... You know, whatever
it is you're talking about.
711
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:17,728
You kind of laugh at it
and be like, I'm glad
that we're able...
712
00:28:17,813 --> 00:28:21,098
-To do this.
-We're truly able to have this
kind of conversation without,
713
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:25,202
um... Feeling like it ain't
sexy, it ain't popular.
714
00:28:25,287 --> 00:28:26,603
-I don't care about that.
-It ain't...
715
00:28:26,706 --> 00:28:29,039
You know, when you
walk away from you partner,
you feel like,
716
00:28:29,125 --> 00:28:31,709
"hey, we really just had this
conversation, is she still..."
717
00:28:31,794 --> 00:28:35,212
you kinda looking for signs,
like, "she's still..."
718
00:28:35,297 --> 00:28:38,298
like, I just told her,
that's a great feeling.
719
00:28:38,417 --> 00:28:41,552
It really is.
It's really a great feeling,
720
00:28:41,637 --> 00:28:46,090
and I recommend it
for every couple.
721
00:28:46,175 --> 00:28:49,126
Because when you can
really talk about anything.
722
00:28:49,228 --> 00:28:52,930
-But you do have to get
to that place, right?
-Yeah.
723
00:28:53,015 --> 00:28:55,733
But I think the best way
to get there is to go in
724
00:28:55,818 --> 00:28:57,901
completely, know who you are,
725
00:28:57,987 --> 00:28:59,153
being free.
726
00:28:59,271 --> 00:29:00,988
People always say,
727
00:29:01,107 --> 00:29:03,941
-"I want to marry
my best friend."
-yeah.
728
00:29:04,026 --> 00:29:06,744
They always say that,
"oh, I hope I can
find someone.
729
00:29:06,829 --> 00:29:08,311
I want to marry
my best friend."
730
00:29:08,414 --> 00:29:10,313
but they don't talk
to their spouse
or their significant other.
731
00:29:10,416 --> 00:29:11,915
They don't treat them
like their best friend.
732
00:29:12,001 --> 00:29:13,167
Like they're their
best friend.
733
00:29:13,285 --> 00:29:15,318
You can tell your best friend
734
00:29:15,421 --> 00:29:17,621
"dang, I saw a girl
in the mall, man,
735
00:29:17,706 --> 00:29:19,456
I almost jumped on her back."
736
00:29:19,542 --> 00:29:21,425
-[laughing]
-right? Or, you know,
737
00:29:21,510 --> 00:29:22,826
-girl--
-which he would tell me.
738
00:29:22,928 --> 00:29:24,845
He will be riding in the car
and he'd be like,
"hey, hey, hey,
739
00:29:24,964 --> 00:29:26,847
I need you to take
your wife hat off
740
00:29:26,966 --> 00:29:28,966
and put your
best friend hat on please.
741
00:29:29,051 --> 00:29:32,352
Because, there was some
yoga pants in the gym today."
and I'll be like...
742
00:29:32,471 --> 00:29:34,521
-"let me have it."
-it's like yoga palooza
happening. I'm like--
743
00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:36,857
-[laughs] let me have it.
-I'm on the treadmill like,
744
00:29:36,976 --> 00:29:39,342
-"oh, lord, this is been
a whole row of..."
-[laughing]
745
00:29:39,445 --> 00:29:41,344
-lululemon's in...
-[laughs] lululemon's.
746
00:29:41,447 --> 00:29:43,013
Right, but look...
747
00:29:43,115 --> 00:29:45,699
The fact that we can
have those-- I'm not trying
to be disrespectful to her.
748
00:29:45,818 --> 00:29:47,534
No, and he's never
been disrespectful.
749
00:29:47,653 --> 00:29:51,188
Right. And I'm not trying
to create an environment
750
00:29:51,290 --> 00:29:53,290
where I don't value her
751
00:29:53,375 --> 00:29:55,626
as my wife and as a woman.
752
00:29:55,711 --> 00:29:59,163
But, I want to be able to talk
to her about urges.
753
00:29:59,248 --> 00:30:00,964
I want her to be able to talk
to me about urges
754
00:30:01,050 --> 00:30:03,867
-because they exist.
-They absolutely do, yeah.
755
00:30:03,969 --> 00:30:07,004
If you think,
that your significant other
756
00:30:07,089 --> 00:30:08,639
doesn't have urges...
757
00:30:09,508 --> 00:30:12,542
-You're tripping.
-[laughing]
758
00:30:12,645 --> 00:30:14,645
and ignoring them...
759
00:30:14,730 --> 00:30:17,481
Just builds them
and builds them
and builds them.
760
00:30:17,566 --> 00:30:20,317
If you don't create
this environment where
you can be open and honest
761
00:30:20,402 --> 00:30:22,736
-with your spouse.
-It's gonna manifest itself
some other way.
762
00:30:22,855 --> 00:30:24,188
It will manifest itself,
because it...
763
00:30:24,273 --> 00:30:26,406
Because really what you
realize happens is
764
00:30:26,525 --> 00:30:28,892
like, the moment I had that
conversation with him,
I was like, "oh,
765
00:30:28,994 --> 00:30:30,828
I feel better now
that I got to talk
to you about that."
766
00:30:30,913 --> 00:30:33,914
-think about that. Right?
-And we got to have a back
and forth about it.
767
00:30:34,033 --> 00:30:37,067
And not only that but it
opens the door to like, "okay,
768
00:30:37,169 --> 00:30:39,036
well, what can we do to,
769
00:30:39,121 --> 00:30:40,871
like, manifest that
in our relationship?"
770
00:30:40,956 --> 00:30:43,841
he won't know that unless
I say something
and so you start to do like,
771
00:30:43,926 --> 00:30:46,543
"okay, if that's the case,
we're gonna have to go
on more date nights"
772
00:30:46,629 --> 00:30:48,178
or we're gonna have
to do more of this or
773
00:30:48,264 --> 00:30:51,515
he would just... I'd be home
and he'd show up with his
suit on and be like,
774
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:55,085
"get dressed. We're going
on a date." I'll be like,
"oh, okay."
775
00:30:55,187 --> 00:30:57,387
when we went counselling
and I'm like,
776
00:30:57,473 --> 00:30:58,856
"well, why do we have
to go to counselling
777
00:30:58,941 --> 00:31:00,023
because you've been married
and all this things.
778
00:31:00,109 --> 00:31:01,925
You know how to be married,
you know?"
779
00:31:02,027 --> 00:31:04,528
-he said, "yeah, but I wasn't
married to you."
-I wasn't married to you.
780
00:31:04,613 --> 00:31:07,281
-[laughs]
-but, this is not about
being married to you,
781
00:31:07,399 --> 00:31:09,432
-so--
-that we're going
to get counselling.
782
00:31:09,535 --> 00:31:11,434
-Okay.
-Yeah. So, we got
pre-marital counselling.
783
00:31:11,537 --> 00:31:15,205
And one thing he said.
He said, "if you want this...
784
00:31:15,291 --> 00:31:17,908
-Go ahead.
-...Marriage to survive..."
785
00:31:17,993 --> 00:31:21,111
he said, "you guys better
pray together everyday."
786
00:31:21,213 --> 00:31:24,131
and we started right then
and there, and we continue it,
787
00:31:24,250 --> 00:31:26,083
-we still do it,
to this very day.
-To this very day.
788
00:31:26,168 --> 00:31:27,617
Before we ever even
got married,
789
00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:30,420
I said, "listen, I need you
to know one thing,
before we get married.
790
00:31:30,506 --> 00:31:33,223
I'm a married to death
kind of guy, okay?
791
00:31:33,309 --> 00:31:35,392
I'm in this to death.
792
00:31:35,477 --> 00:31:38,095
So, if you don't want to be
in it to death with me,
793
00:31:38,180 --> 00:31:39,629
-let's not do this. Okay?"
-mmm-hmm.
794
00:31:39,732 --> 00:31:42,632
So every time she would throw
them in on the way out
the door I'd say,
795
00:31:42,735 --> 00:31:45,319
"well, when you pack
a bag for you,
pack one for me, too. Okay?
796
00:31:45,437 --> 00:31:50,240
'cause where ever
we're going, baby, we're going
to be together. Okay?"
797
00:31:50,342 --> 00:31:52,743
I grew up in a very much
so affectionate family, right?
798
00:31:52,861 --> 00:31:55,445
We hug every time
we see each other, right.
799
00:31:55,531 --> 00:31:57,114
He never had that.
800
00:31:57,199 --> 00:31:58,865
Like, I would hug him,
you know, everyday.
801
00:31:58,951 --> 00:32:00,567
He'll be like, "why, why...
Why are we hugging?"
802
00:32:00,669 --> 00:32:03,754
like, you know,
or saying I love you
803
00:32:03,872 --> 00:32:05,589
to my parents,
to my mom, to my dad.
804
00:32:05,708 --> 00:32:08,575
He feels like, "why y'all do
that all the time?
This is weird," like--
805
00:32:08,677 --> 00:32:11,712
I was like, "no,
that's just how we...
You know, we are."
806
00:32:11,797 --> 00:32:14,798
I had to get to a place
where I understood
807
00:32:14,883 --> 00:32:16,600
he didn't grow up
the same way.
808
00:32:16,719 --> 00:32:18,435
So he doesn't know
809
00:32:18,554 --> 00:32:20,370
what I know, right?
810
00:32:20,472 --> 00:32:22,940
And I had to understand that
811
00:32:23,042 --> 00:32:25,208
just because he doesn't know,
it doesn't make him wrong.
812
00:32:25,311 --> 00:32:27,144
It's just,
I want to introduce it to him.
813
00:32:27,246 --> 00:32:29,730
And so, sometime I would
really try to force it on him.
814
00:32:29,815 --> 00:32:31,431
-[laughs]
-um... And then
I had to realize,
815
00:32:31,533 --> 00:32:33,784
oh, it ain't going to work.
Forcing ain't going to work.
816
00:32:33,902 --> 00:32:37,454
So let me gently expose
him to love.
817
00:32:37,573 --> 00:32:39,656
And then he got to a place
where he wanted to hug
818
00:32:39,742 --> 00:32:42,125
-and I was like, "get off me.
What are you doing?"
-yeah, yeah.
819
00:32:42,244 --> 00:32:44,127
He had turned me into...
820
00:32:44,246 --> 00:32:47,230
'cause I had tried my best to
do what I thought he needed.
821
00:32:47,333 --> 00:32:49,616
And I had turned off
this side of me.
822
00:32:49,718 --> 00:32:52,919
And so when he was ready
for it. I didn't want it.
823
00:32:53,005 --> 00:32:55,505
I was like, "what...
What are you doing?"
824
00:32:55,591 --> 00:32:56,923
-yeah.
-He was like,
825
00:32:57,009 --> 00:32:58,592
"you used to always
want to hug."
826
00:32:58,677 --> 00:33:02,095
I was like, "yeah, but you
didn't like that so I did turn
that part off, bro.
827
00:33:02,181 --> 00:33:06,099
-Back off, decide,
like, what you want?"
-[both laughing]
828
00:33:06,185 --> 00:33:09,636
but now, thank god we...
You know,
829
00:33:09,738 --> 00:33:11,738
we came out of that curve
into the straighter way.
830
00:33:12,358 --> 00:33:13,690
And now we both like to,
831
00:33:13,776 --> 00:33:17,143
-to hug and stuff.
-And now I'm like, "hey.
Hey, come over here."
832
00:33:17,246 --> 00:33:19,279
-yeah, I'll be on the couch.
-"oh, no, not today.
833
00:33:19,365 --> 00:33:21,581
I need you, I want to lay
right here in your lap.
834
00:33:22,785 --> 00:33:24,201
All I need is 30 minutes
right here.
835
00:33:24,286 --> 00:33:25,702
Babe, put your legs
right here."
836
00:33:25,788 --> 00:33:27,788
when I met him, he was always
837
00:33:27,873 --> 00:33:29,539
-the bbd.
That's what he calls himself.
-The bbd.
838
00:33:29,625 --> 00:33:33,343
I'm just the bigger better
deal, like, you're never
going to find anyone
839
00:33:33,462 --> 00:33:36,513
that's going to offer you,
840
00:33:36,632 --> 00:33:39,549
as a spouse, as a man,
what I can offer you.
841
00:33:39,635 --> 00:33:42,519
-I know that.
-And that was from day...
That was from day one.
842
00:33:42,638 --> 00:33:44,354
And to be quite honest,
843
00:33:44,473 --> 00:33:46,556
he is right.
Like, he is 100% right.
844
00:33:46,642 --> 00:33:48,692
Which is why I knew
I can have that
conversation with him.
845
00:33:48,811 --> 00:33:51,361
So I think, probably,
when I said that to him,
846
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:53,196
or when I said it out loud,
847
00:33:53,315 --> 00:33:56,149
I didn't really have a fear
that he would,
848
00:33:56,235 --> 00:33:58,402
like, fly off the handle
or anything like that.
849
00:33:58,487 --> 00:33:59,853
-A, 'cause he is--
-what did you mean?
850
00:33:59,955 --> 00:34:02,823
'cause he is confident
enough in himself.
851
00:34:02,908 --> 00:34:05,542
Like, that's what a real
relationship is. Like,
people say it all the time.
852
00:34:05,661 --> 00:34:07,544
But a real relationship is
853
00:34:07,663 --> 00:34:10,697
being able to be 100%
of yourself
854
00:34:10,799 --> 00:34:13,500
all the time,
every single day and still...
855
00:34:13,585 --> 00:34:15,836
And the other person being
the same
856
00:34:15,921 --> 00:34:17,587
and you guys are still
on the same place.
857
00:34:17,673 --> 00:34:20,724
Like, if you're only bringing
20% of yourself to the table,
858
00:34:20,843 --> 00:34:23,209
and then you guys go however
many years you go
859
00:34:23,312 --> 00:34:25,896
and then the other ten starts
to slip out and then
860
00:34:26,014 --> 00:34:28,348
a 15% after that,
then now you are
a different person.
861
00:34:28,434 --> 00:34:29,716
That's not who that
person married.
862
00:34:29,818 --> 00:34:32,018
So, I think from the beginning
863
00:34:32,104 --> 00:34:33,887
I was 100% myself.
864
00:34:33,989 --> 00:34:36,022
Probably to a fault,
like, where I was like,
865
00:34:36,108 --> 00:34:37,691
you're good, I'm not,
like, I'm not trying to...
866
00:34:37,776 --> 00:34:40,193
And he was 100% himself
and there was...
867
00:34:40,279 --> 00:34:42,779
There was no, like,
little side things coming in
868
00:34:42,865 --> 00:34:45,282
throughout the 17 years
we've been together.
869
00:34:46,001 --> 00:34:48,067
A lot of people think that,
870
00:34:48,170 --> 00:34:52,923
love and marriage is about
romance and kicking it
together and having...
871
00:34:53,041 --> 00:34:55,742
But it's really purpose in it.
872
00:34:55,844 --> 00:34:59,262
When god brings certain people
together, you know,
873
00:34:59,381 --> 00:35:01,915
and you know you know
you're not dancing around,
874
00:35:02,017 --> 00:35:02,883
well, maybe I don't know...
875
00:35:02,968 --> 00:35:04,518
But when you know you know,
876
00:35:04,603 --> 00:35:09,306
there is a purpose behind it.
And we can see that
ours wasn't just about,
877
00:35:09,391 --> 00:35:11,608
-"oh, I love you."
-oh, but I do.
878
00:35:11,727 --> 00:35:14,227
-Yeah, I know,
but it was really...
-[laughing]
879
00:35:14,313 --> 00:35:16,062
-you know, there was
a god purpose in it.
-Right.
880
00:35:16,148 --> 00:35:18,148
-Especially for our children.
-Yes.
881
00:35:18,233 --> 00:35:20,650
And their marriages,
'cause all of our children
are married.
882
00:35:20,736 --> 00:35:21,818
-Praise god.
-Parise god.
883
00:35:21,904 --> 00:35:23,570
-I pray that they all
stay married.
-Oh, lord.
884
00:35:23,655 --> 00:35:25,271
-Please let them stay married.
-Praise the lord.
885
00:35:25,374 --> 00:35:27,791
-For the sake of our
grandchildren especially.
-Yes.
886
00:35:27,910 --> 00:35:30,744
But we're always leaving
foot prints for them,
887
00:35:30,829 --> 00:35:32,496
you know, like,
"how do we get through
this one, how do we..."
888
00:35:32,581 --> 00:35:34,414
you know, how, you know,
we see them
889
00:35:34,500 --> 00:35:36,500
going on the wrong track,
we'll sit them down
890
00:35:36,585 --> 00:35:38,618
and have a come to jesus
meeting with them,
891
00:35:38,720 --> 00:35:39,669
-okay, you know.
-Oh, yeah.
892
00:35:39,755 --> 00:35:42,339
-They may not like it
but it helps us.
-Yeah.
893
00:35:42,424 --> 00:35:45,759
Marriage has taught me
to listen.
894
00:35:46,512 --> 00:35:49,095
Um... And patience.
895
00:35:49,515 --> 00:35:53,433
And...I can't have everything
my way.
896
00:35:53,519 --> 00:35:57,437
Because I used
to listen to react.
897
00:35:57,523 --> 00:35:59,639
Right. When I was young,
'cause we was all
young together.
898
00:35:59,741 --> 00:36:01,441
I want to get my two cent in.
899
00:36:02,194 --> 00:36:05,812
But now, after years
and years,
900
00:36:05,914 --> 00:36:08,615
I listen sometimes
not to react at all,
901
00:36:08,700 --> 00:36:11,701
but just to be able to know
how to love him.
902
00:36:11,787 --> 00:36:14,037
Uh, be able to give him
what he needs.
903
00:36:14,122 --> 00:36:18,842
So, it has definitely taught
me that listening has power.
904
00:36:18,961 --> 00:36:22,796
And it helps me be a better
woman and wife.
905
00:36:22,881 --> 00:36:26,132
-So... Yeah.
-Marriage has taught me,
906
00:36:27,603 --> 00:36:29,102
that god is real.
907
00:36:29,805 --> 00:36:31,671
I wasn't raised in a church.
908
00:36:31,773 --> 00:36:33,223
Like, I told you,
I don't really have...
909
00:36:33,308 --> 00:36:36,193
I didn't really have a lot
of knowledge about marriage.
910
00:36:36,311 --> 00:36:38,662
Um...But...
911
00:36:38,780 --> 00:36:43,700
Through... If I...
In reflecting on our
912
00:36:43,819 --> 00:36:47,320
marriage and now where we are
sitting here with you,
913
00:36:47,406 --> 00:36:49,188
god has to be real.
914
00:36:49,291 --> 00:36:51,190
He has to be real.
915
00:36:51,293 --> 00:36:53,994
I hadn't even thought about
some of the arguments
916
00:36:54,079 --> 00:36:55,295
and some of the words, like,
917
00:36:55,998 --> 00:36:59,049
harsh and, like, flat out
918
00:36:59,167 --> 00:37:02,586
mean things that we had said
and done to each other,
919
00:37:02,671 --> 00:37:04,504
in a long time, right.
920
00:37:04,590 --> 00:37:07,390
And when you're going through
that stuff, you're only
thinking about that moment.
921
00:37:07,509 --> 00:37:10,060
And the fact that right now
we are here
922
00:37:10,178 --> 00:37:12,712
telling our story. Um...
923
00:37:12,814 --> 00:37:15,015
And me know...
I know me better than anybody.
924
00:37:15,100 --> 00:37:17,400
And I'm just thinking about
the things that,
925
00:37:17,519 --> 00:37:22,105
the little knowledge in almost
every category that I had.
926
00:37:22,190 --> 00:37:24,357
And I'm not pro, I can't tell
you a scripture out of
the bible.
927
00:37:24,443 --> 00:37:27,360
I can't tell you nothing.
But I can tell you
928
00:37:27,446 --> 00:37:28,912
that it's the only
the grace of god
929
00:37:29,031 --> 00:37:31,081
that we are sitting here,
930
00:37:31,199 --> 00:37:33,733
that we are able
to love each other,
931
00:37:33,835 --> 00:37:35,869
able to have
certain conversations.
932
00:37:35,954 --> 00:37:40,090
And I hope, it inspires
somebody who watches
this and see this,
933
00:37:40,208 --> 00:37:43,260
um, that that ain't nobody
but god.
934
00:37:43,378 --> 00:37:47,413
That's what marriage has
taught me about myself.
935
00:37:47,516 --> 00:37:48,682
[both laughing]
936
00:37:49,384 --> 00:37:50,800
absolutely.
937
00:37:50,886 --> 00:37:51,918
♪ I really love you ♪
938
00:37:52,020 --> 00:37:53,970
♪ let's do this
for a lifetime ♪
939
00:37:54,056 --> 00:37:56,089
♪ a lifetime ♪
940
00:37:56,191 --> 00:37:59,726
♪ so tell me baby, baby
baby, baby ♪
941
00:37:59,811 --> 00:38:03,563
♪ will you love me,
love me, love me, love me ♪
942
00:38:03,649 --> 00:38:07,934
♪ forever, forever
and always ♪
943
00:38:08,036 --> 00:38:09,886
♪ yeah ♪
944
00:38:09,988 --> 00:38:12,589
♪ baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
945
00:38:12,691 --> 00:38:16,326
♪ will you love me,
love me, love me, love me ♪
946
00:38:16,428 --> 00:38:20,830
♪ forever, forever
and always ♪
947
00:38:21,533 --> 00:38:23,466
[vocalizing]
948
00:38:23,568 --> 00:38:26,169
♪ I found myself
in the deep of the night ♪
949
00:38:26,271 --> 00:38:28,638
♪ dreaming days
where we take on the ocean ♪
950
00:38:28,740 --> 00:38:30,173
♪ and rivers wide ♪
951
00:38:30,275 --> 00:38:32,776
♪ I see you paint in the sky
you and I ♪
952
00:38:32,878 --> 00:38:35,128
♪ and we are flyin' away
so high ♪
953
00:38:35,230 --> 00:38:38,815
♪ whether life send us
up to the mountain ♪
954
00:38:38,934 --> 00:38:43,469
♪ or down through
the roughest valley ♪
955
00:38:43,572 --> 00:38:46,690
♪ I want to do it
with you, always ♪
956
00:38:46,775 --> 00:38:49,359
♪ yes, I do, yes, I do ♪
957
00:38:49,444 --> 00:38:52,662
♪ baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
958
00:38:52,764 --> 00:38:55,999
♪ love me, love me,
love me, love me ♪
959
00:38:56,118 --> 00:39:00,837
♪ forever, forever
and always ♪
960
00:39:00,956 --> 00:39:02,539
♪ just let me know
you rockin' with me ♪
961
00:39:02,624 --> 00:39:05,008
♪ baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
962
00:39:05,127 --> 00:39:08,812
♪ will you love me, love me,
love me, love me ♪
963
00:39:08,914 --> 00:39:14,617
♪ forever, forever
and always ♪
964
00:39:14,720 --> 00:39:18,221
♪ just tell me
baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
965
00:39:18,306 --> 00:39:22,525
♪ will you love me, love me,
love me, love me ♪
966
00:39:22,627 --> 00:39:24,644
♪ I want to know
I need to know ♪
967
00:39:24,730 --> 00:39:25,979
♪ yeah ♪
968
00:39:26,064 --> 00:39:28,198
♪ I wanna love you
forever and ever ♪
969
00:39:28,316 --> 00:39:31,000
♪ tell me
baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
970
00:39:31,119 --> 00:39:35,071
♪ will you love me, love me,
love me, love me ♪
971
00:39:35,173 --> 00:39:39,342
♪ forever, forever
and always ♪
972
00:39:39,444 --> 00:39:40,977
[vocalizing]
973
00:39:41,079 --> 00:39:44,047
♪ baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
974
00:39:44,149 --> 00:39:48,017
♪ will you love me, love me,
love me, love me ♪
975
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:53,973
♪ forever and always ♪