[whistling]
♪ One, two, One, two, three, four! ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Na, na, na, na Na, na, na, na ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪
[whistling]
[chicken clucks]
Okay, Cricket. Off the board, off the rim,
bounce through the rafters, and through the--
[smack]
Community Sue, I'm so sorry, I--
Didn't feel a thing! Okay, youngsters,
hit the bleachers!
Thank you all for volunteering
for our "Big Buddy, Lil' Buddy" program
I'm going to pair each of you with a lil' buddy.
Your job is to make a positive impact
on their mushy, undeveloped brains!
Who has questions? Yes, Cricket!
This is for the pizza thing, right?
We get free pizza if we're big buddies or whatever?
At the end of the day,
all participants may attend a pizza party.
- Are there any more-- - Is it from Mama Roni's?
I love Mama Roni's.
[sighs] Yes, Cricket.
But the real reward here isn't pizza!
It's the chance to make a lasting--
Yeah, yeah, yeah, the kids are the future and all that. Kumbaya.
Aren't you excited to be a role model, brother?
Yeah, I'm excited to roll
- some pizza into my-- - Mkay.
- All right, meet your lil' buddies! - [cheering]
- Whatchoo got, tater tot? - One potato, two potato.
Wanna see me stick my whole hand in my mouth?
[shouting] What, like it's hard?
Check out all the games on my phone!
Green! I'm pairing you with Emma here.
Show her some of that Tilly charm.
How do you do? I offer a welcoming gift.
Sour straws?
For like life, they can be bitter,
but sweetness is always soon to follow.
[awed] That's true!
[smacking lips]
And finally,
meet your new lil' buddy, Chase!
[growling]
- Yay! - What?
- [growling] - Ah!
Uh, hey, Chase. I'm your big buddy, Cricket.
Ah! Get off of me!
Sue, I think my buddy's defective.
You gotta give me another kid!
- Nope! Chase is yours till three pm. - But--
Okay, everybody! We've got crafts time
the boomba room. Move it!
[manic laughter]
[squeaking]
[panting]
Do it for Mama Roni.
Chase! Who wants to go draw a dinosaur? Ah!
[manic laughter]
[laughter and chatter]
[Emma sighs]
What's wrong, Emma?
I wanna put googly eyes on my painting,
but we ran out of glue.
Ah, not to worry, little lady,
for the paint provides. Observe.
[Emma] Whoa! They stuck to the wet paint.
Cool! Tilly, you are amazing!
Haha, Emma, you are correct.
Looks like you two are getting along well!
Cricket! How you doin-- Oh!
Chase, you stop makin' paper spitballs right now!
- [spits, grunts] - [Remy] Ah! My glasses!
Dangit all, I'm your big buddy, and that means you gotta do what I say!
So, you and I are gonna go back to that table, sit quietly
and think about the pizza and possibly chicken wings
that await us if we get along.
Whaddya say to that?
[coughing]
He glitterbombed me!
Come here you-- gah!
Oh, you wanna tussle?
- Let's tussle! - [grunting]
[both slurp and sigh]
- [Cricket] Tilly... - Hi, Cricket.
How's it going with your lil' buddy?
He refused to sit in time-out, so I had to fasten him
to a cabinet with a bunch of pipe cleaners.
I'm completely outmatched.
How'd you train your kid to be so good?
- Oh, she asked to do this. - [Emma giggles]
Cricket, the only advice I can give
is something you know better than anyone.
Sometimes, the only way to soothe a wild beast
is by taming its heart.
Whoa. I've gotta write that one down.
Taming his heart! What's that even mean?
- Ah, Tilly! You and your riddle-- - [Chase] Ah!
- [fighting sounds] - Good luck on your journey, brother.
Oh, hello.
I told them you're the smartest kid in the world,
and they wanted to meet you!
Tell them what you told me about worms!
That they are the sharks of the dirt ocean beneath our feet?
[children gasp]
- [excited chatter] - Interesting development.
- [blows whistle] It's time to-- - [squeaking]
Hit the pool!
[splashing and laughter]
Looks like things are going swimmingly, Til!
- [Sue laughs] - Ha! Ha! Ha ha!
Would you stop that?
No way! You're boring!
I'm not boring! I just got stuck
with the world's most hyperactive hairball--
Ah!
Oh snap. Come on, move, move, move--
Oh, he's fine.
Ah, that hurt!
Well, yeah! That's what happens
when you don't [grunts] tuck and roll!
Wha--? Show me that again!
- You like that? - Totally!
I got awesome moves, the landings just really hurt.
If you could show me more stuff like that
I could do even cooler moves! [giggles]
So, stunts. You want me to teach ya how to do stunts.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I guess I am
the stunt master general.
But if I do this, will you stop torturing me?
Uh huh, uh huh!
Fine, I'll teach ya everything I know.
I'll make you better and stronger than I ever was,
and you have to carry on my legacy,
but I ain't happy about it!
Just follow me, you lil' creep.
Great form, Gregory!
I told you, it's Gregly!
[splashing]
[whistle blows]
All right, peepers on me! Stunt school's in session.
Lesson one, pinballing.
- Wow! - All right, your turn.
[grunts] Oof!
Ah.
[whistle blows]
[grunting]
Lesson two, stuff dodging!
[grunting and panting]
Nice dodging, lil' buddy!
[grunting] Okay, Chase! We gotta go now!
[whistle blows]
Final lesson, flinging!
Yeah! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Now let go!
- Are you sure? - Don't worry!
- I gotcha! - [Chase] Hup!
- [eagle cry] - Ha.
[both grunt and laugh]
Those are some pretty sick moves you little devil!
I think you're ready for the big leagues.
- Let's go! - [both grunt]
[heavy breathing]
- Uh, y'know-- - Silence! The great Tilly speaketh!
Uh, I was just going to say the water isn't that cold.
What does she mean?
So wise! So powerful!
Emma, may I have a word?
Okay! We will reconvene
for further enlightenment in five minutes.
What's on your mind, Tilly?
Emma, shouldn't your friends be gettin' back
to their own big buddies?
But you're the bestest big buddy there is!
That's why us Till-ites have come to learn from you.
That is so sweet-- Wait.
Who are the Till-ites?
Us! Your loyal followers.
We wanna be just like you.
And how!
Emma, I'm flattered,
but I'm also a little uncomfortable
with all this unwarranted attention.
I hope you understand.
- [gasps] - It's for you!
Now we all look just like you.
Uh...
You've done well so far, my protégé.
But this stunt is the stunt to end all stunts.
So crazy and stupid, it's gotten me
officially labeled a "young disruptor"
and they didn't mean that in a good way!
Behold, the human boulder!
[manic laughter]
I've rendered a detailed simulation of how it works.
You and I are gonna jump on the yoga ball,
activating the fire extinguisher jet,
sending us flying around the basketball court,
thus creating utter chaos.
I've also sketched a bunch of ninjas.
They're not part of the plan, I just like drawing them.
This is nice.
I've never had a big buddy like you before.
You're crazy. I'm glad we got paired up.
I'm glad, too, you little demon.
- You ready for this? - Bingo bango.
Count down to chaos
in three,
two,
one!
[Sue] There you kids are!
It's three pm. Program's over.
Come get some pizza.
- Wahoo! And that's a wrap. - What about out stunt?
Nah, forget all that, it's pizza time!
[laughing and cheering]
Oh, yeah!
Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm!
Ha, Cricket Green, you really helped someone out today.
And that someone was yourself.
Hey! Watch where you're--
- Chase? - I thought you were my big buddy!
But you're just a big duddy!
- [gasps] - [cries]
What was that all about?
Oh, don't beat yourself up.
You got further with Chase than most.
What do you mean?
All his previous big buddies
gave up within an hour.
He's not a bad kid,
he just needs someone who understands.
I thought maybe you could give him a friend.
But I guess not.
♪ Remember the stuff we did ♪
♪ Remember the times we had ♪
♪ Don't forget about this ♪
♪ Or this, or this ♪
♪ Remember the stuff we did ♪
The majority of those didn't even happen.
And now they never will, if don't make things right.
Sorry, Mama Roni, I gotta find my lil' buddy!
I'm so happy I could punch a wall!
Ah!
[panting] Chase! Wait up, lil' bud!
- Go away! - Dang it, Chase!
[grunting]
Pinballing?
Which sport should we play?
- How 'bout we play all of them? - Yay!
Stuffdodging?
I'd be steamed if I wasn't so dang proud!
Whoa! [grunts]
Not bad!
But how about this!
Ow!
[panting]
Ch-Chase! Wait! Ah.
[kids] Tilly! Tilly!
Enlighten us with your wisdom!
[Tilly] Hm, their level of adoration has gotten quite unhealthy.
Time to bounce.
Loyal followers!
I will now grant you my greatest wisdom!
For this you must close your eyes and meditate.
- [kids] Ooh. - [whispering] What's a meditate?
[gasps] She's ascended!
- Magic! - [cheering]
- Hey. - Go back to your party.
I can't. Gotta pull off the sickest stunt
in community center history.
You didn't wanna be my friend,
you just wanted that free pizza.
I'll admit, I didn't get into this stuff to be a role model,
I got into it for some easy cheese.
But ding-darn it, I found something even better.
A crazy, buck-wild gremlin,
and the best lil' buddy I could ever ask for.
So whaddya say, wanna be my partner in crime?
Ah! [laughs]
It's a deal.
- [Chase and Cricket] Wahoo! - Jeffrey!
- [Chase and Cricket cheering] - [people screaming]
What is happening?
[man] Oh, no!