(theme music playing)
SINGER: ♪ One, two ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪
Good evening, everyone!
And welcome to Gloria Plus Green Cafe's
first-ever trivia night!
(cheering)
Wow, it appears we'll be facing the entire
neighborhood in this intellectual blood-sport.
No sweat. Our competition's a bunch
of empty-headed know-nothin's.
If only your brain were as wrinkly as your face.
You wanna catch these hands, you smooth-brained ingrate?
Can we not, Ma?
Trash-talking aside, I agree with Alice.
The Green family makes a killer trivia team.
Bill knows science from working on the farm.
Tilly's a well-read expert in literature.
And Gramma's a history buff after living so long.
(makes sound)
And I used to be a roadie,
so I've got music covered.
Plus you got me.
Oh, Cricket.
Yes, we sure do, kiddo.
We sure do.
All right. Let's see what category I can take.
Hmm. Oh, perfect. "Geo-graffie!"
Guess that's me.
Geography is a bit of a tough one, brother.
You sure you got it?
Don't worry. I'm a whiz at math.
Okay. First question,
who wrote the classic novel Little Women?
-(buzz) -Louisa May Alcott.
And the first question of the night goes to the Greens.
-(cheering) -Very good.
Moving right along. During what month
-does the winter solstice occur? -(buzzer buzzing)
December. It's the month with the least daylight.
Correct. Looks like the Greens are on a roll.
Wow. Great job, Mr. Green.
Looks like they're the team to beat, huh, Mr. Grigorian?
All right. Next category is geography.
Here we go.
What is the capital of Mexico?
-(buzz) -The answer is "M."
Come again?
The capital is the first letter,
therefore the capital of Mexico is M.
-(sighs) -No, no, no.
It's Mexico City.
And right you are, Remy.
Cricket, wow, just wow.
-Dang, I was real close. -Hey, son.
What if you let us handle the geography questions?
But that's my category. If I can't do that,
how will I help the team?
Well, you could press the buzzer.
-Oh, yeah! -That's a great idea.
Nobody's faster than you, Cricket!
(excited gasp) Wait a minute.
Y'all think I'm dumb or something?
-No, not at all! -Absolutely not.
The nerve! Look, I admit,
I'm not the sharpest spoon in the bucket,
but I've got some real smarts in my noggin!
Hey, it's all right, kiddo!
I'm sure a question you know will pop up!
But for now, just focus on the buzzer, okay?
I know I know stuff.
I just gotta look deep inside my mind and find it!
Huh?
Ahh! I'm inside my head!
And this must be my dadgum brain!
Wheeee!
Cricket, what are you doing with that--
-Cricket! -(laughing)
It looks like it's getting pretty full.
Should we send the signal?
Nah, just schedule it for later.
(upbeat music playing)
I'll never get sick of this song.
This place is amazing!
But how am I gonna find-- ah, excuse me.
Can I get some help?
Buzz off. Can't you see I'm--
it's the boss!
-I never thought I'd see you. -Wow!
-He's here! -He visits us!
Hi. What the heck are you guys?
We're your Brain-Crickets! "Brickets" for short.
You think it, we make it happen!
How can I be of service?
Well, I need to go see all my knowledge.
Sure thing.
Follow me right this way.
Welcome to your knowledge bank!
That's a lotta knowledge!
And you're adding to it every day! Oh.
Here's some new knowledge now!
Blegh! What are those?
Factoids!
Each one is a little fact you've learned.
"M" is not the capital of Mexico!
Hey, that's right. Because I learned...
Remy knows the capital of Mexico!
Oh, man. I've gotta have better stuff than that, right?
See, there's this trivia night thing going on
and I've got to impress my family
with some big brained knowledge.
Hmm. We're gonna need some help.
But I know just who to call.
Boss, meet the very first fact you ever learned.
Dogs can't spit.
Oh, yeah. I remember learning that.
Spitty's been here longer than any of us.
You won't find a more qualified brain guide.
Dogs can't spit.
You're saying my real smarts are in "the vaults"?
Wait. How can I understand you?
Dogs can't spit!
Oh! That makes perfect sense!
Now, let's hit those vaults!
I've got to prove to my family that I'm not dumb.
Speaking of which, boss,
I believe you're needed back outside!
-(moan) -GRAMMA: Cricket!
Cricket, I know this one! Hit the buzzer!
-Cricket! -Huh?
The answer is 1903!
Take that, you dirty witch!
(laughing)
What in the sam heck are you doing over there, boy?
Don't be hard on Cricket. He probably got confused!
Here, son, this is the button part.
You gotta do this motion on the top to--
I know how a dang buzzer works, Dad!
I gotta find those smarts quick.
Guys! Come on. We don't got time to waste.
Right. Spitty!
Dogs can't spit.
Whoa, so these are the vaults?
Dogs can't spit.
Okay, so each vault contains specific knowledge,
but you're not sure which one the real smarts are in?
Man, you guys should label this stuff!
Dogs can't spit.
Don't sass me.
(upbeat music playing)
Waffles are just pancakes with squares!
No matter how much you drink,
coffee foam doesn't fill you up!
Looks like this vault is just facts about food.
(gasp) Is that Phoenix?
(heavy panting) Bark!
(gasp) Ahh, get back, you monster!
(whimpers) Relish!
Relish!
The word "relish"
always calms Phoenix down.
Aww, this vault is just Phoenix facts.
Swing and a miss!
(laughing)
What am I gonna do with all these Croblins?
-(farts) -Koo-koo-kachoo!
Funny, but not what we're looking for.
Come on, Spitty.
Nostradamus!
Correct!
Latitude!
That's right!
The War of 1812!
Another for the Remingtons!
We're starting to lose our lead!
Well, we're trying to give Cricket a chance,
but is he even with us?
Cricket! Cricket!
Ugh, we've checked almost all of the vaults
and ain't found diddly-squat!
This has to be the one!
Please, please, please, please.
What the--
Bats hurt!
Lemon juice burns the eyes!
Wood hurts!
Marble hurts even more!
Corkboard ain't that bad!
Pain facts!
This room is dangerous.
Dogs can't spit!
The real smarts.
Spitty, ya found 'em.
Hey. You know what hurts?
(indistinct chatter)
(chomp)
Dogs! Can't! Spit!
Bats hurt. Bats hurt.
Spitty!
Dogs!
Can't!
Spit!
Spitty, no!
Whew. Spitty, your sacrifice
will not be in vain.
All righty. We're at the last question of the night
and it's the bonus mystery question!
That's worth five times the amount of points!
-Mystery question? -All right, Greens.
All hands on deck! This could be for anyone!
Stay sharp, Cricket, we might need you!
Not to worry, family,
I've finally found my real smarts.
You had to find them?
I had to dig deep,
but finally I can unleash
all of my incredible knowledge.
Antarctica is cold.
Fourteen minus six is eight.
That's it?
That's all I have?
Ugh, never mind.
Where are you going, son?
Home. I'm no good to ya.
All I got in my head is useless junk.
-Cricket. -Don't beat yourself up, boy.
I mean it ain't like you're Grigorian-level stupid.
That's it! Take this, you putrid bowl of oatmeal!
-Whoa. -Whoa.
Whoa.
Sorry about that.
(screaming)
I knew I should've got coffee foam insurance!
I can't open the door!
I never thought I'd suffer
such a foamy demise.
What do we do?
Well, it's just coffee foam.
We could probably eat it because...
Coffee foam doesn't fill you up!
Everyone eat it! Eat the foam!
Come on, you guys! I can't help y'all if you don't chill out!
Brett, try saying the word "Relish."
It helps soothe my dog Phoenix!
Uh, okay. Relish, relish.
That worked? Thanks, Cricket!
That was really smart.
I can't get close enough to unplug the foamer!
How do we shut it off?
Ahh! Huh?
Corkboard! Mr. Remington,
I need you to throw me into that corkboard!
I'm not about to throw a child.
-You'll get hurt! -It's all right.
Corkboard don't hurt that bad.
Now quarterback me!
Oh, say less! Hike!
That only kind of hurt!
Now that really hurt.
We're free!
Hey.
(cheering)
Did we win? What's happening?
You saved us, Cricket.
Well, it's the least a dummy could do.
-NANCY: Dummy? -Cricket, you're not a dummy!
Thanks, Dad, but I couldn't even answer one trivia question.
Son, there's all different types of knowledge.
Some conventional. Some more unique.
Without your special know-how, we would've drowned in foam!
Well, koo-koo-kachoo.
I guess I'm smarter than I thought!
Though I wish I could've gotten at least one question right.
Oh, yeah, what was the mystery question?
Oh, it was, "Name one animal that can't spit."
Ah-ha-ha!
Dogs! Dogs can't spit!
Hey, yeah, that's correct!
-Woo-hoo! -(cheering)
Dogs can't spit.
(dramatic music playing)
Oh, Tilly, my sweet little angel.
A real beacon of goodness, that one.
Welp, one out of two ain't bad.
Ah, nothing like a freshly cleaned... house?
What in the--
Cricket!
MAN (on TV): New diet cheese puffs are so light,
they'll make you Fly!
Yeah, right.
Whaa--miracles are real!
Wee--oh, hey, Dad.
I just finished cleaning the whole house,
and then you go and wreck the place?
What are you talkin' about? I didn't do nothin'.
-I've heard that one before. -Pardon me, Papa.
It was actually me who was responsible.
I gave Melissa a mud bath and then I brought her inside
for tap dance lessons.
I now realize I should have swapped those two items
on our itinerary.
Tilly, you did this?
But--but I thought you were an angel.
-I am! -Cricket's always
the troublemaker.
I suppose I have no choice
but to send you to your room, Cricket--
oops, reflex.
I meant, Cricket--darn it!
Come on, stop fighting it.
T--Till--Till--
Cricket! Cricket! Cricket! Gaah!
T--Tilly, I just cleaned the house
and you know dirty animals aren't allowed inside.
Therefore, you're being punished.
I've never been punished before.
Now, go to your room.
I--aah.
BILL: I thought you were an angel.
I'm shocked. This is bad, Tilly.
Have I fallen from grace?
What does this mean?
Have I sunken deep
into a life of misdeeds?
I thought I was Papa's perfect little angel.
But angels don't do bad things.
Angels don't disappoint their Papas, do they?
No, no, they do not!
So, if I'm no longer an angel,
I'm... a bad kid.
That's right, Mr. Friggles.
Don't look away from my twisted rebirth.
Tilly Green is an angel no more!
(laughing)
Okay, Tilly!
I think you served your time,
you can come out now!
This feels so wrong.
She'll be fine. It builds character.
Yeah, Dad, this is an important moment for Tilly!
It's the beginning of her journey as a bad kid!
I gotta make sure to document the very beginning
of Tilly's descent.
Now, if I know my Tilly,
she'll never do anything bad again.
Sup, old man?
Wow.
Tilly, what happened to my good little girl?
The Tilly you once knew is gone.
-Wow. -This can't be happening.
My good baby.
-(blubbering) -This is so funny.
Oh, my gosh. Tilly, Tilly, Tilly!
Do something bad! Do something bad!
No! Do not encourage this!
First, I'm gonna drink this milk.
Oh! Well, in that case, you better grab a--
But I'm not gonna grab a cup!
But that's so unsanitary!
Now, I'm gonna scratch all my bug bites!
But that only makes them itchier!
Tilly! Where are you going?
-Out. -Where?
To a little place called Nunya.
It's in the business district.
Okay. So that's Nunya in the business district.
Nunya business?
That does it. There go your extended
TV privileges, young lady.
Do you hear me?
I can't believe this is happening.
Listen, we all knew that if one of us
were to snap one day, it would be Tilly.
-It's always the quiet ones. -I'm sorry.
Tilly had "extended TV privileges?"
Well, yeah. I give Tilly rewards for good behavior.
At least I used to.
You mean being "good"
comes with perks?
So that's why people do it!
(sighs) I guess I better figure out
what I'm gonna do when Tilly gets home.
Rewards for good behavior, huh?
(chuckles)
-(bell rings) -Whoa!
Who are you and what do you want?
Relax, Andromeda.
It's me, Tilly.
I'm just bad now.
And you're gonna be bad with me.
I've never been peer-pressured before.
I'd be honored!
TILLY: We shall become the baddest,
most feared group of bad girls,
and Saxon, in Big City.
We are The Monarch Butterflies!
Why are we called The Monarch Butterflies?
Because they're poisonous to birds.
-Oh. -Now listen up, ladies.
Here's what we need to do.
One surefire way to be bad
is to lie.
I said I wanted bangs.
Excuse me.
I just have to say,
your haircut looks very cool.
No, it doesn't!
You're a liar!
Sure am. And lying is bad.
But, you know, hearing someone say that
has really boosted my confidence!
Now I feel like I can take on the world!
Thanks, little girl!
TILLY: Another way to be bad is to make mayhem.
I just know today is gonna be a good day.
Ugh! Oh, no!
Mayhem made.
(gasp)
Are you... okay?
You saved me.
Listen, I know we just met, but will you marry me?
-Yes. -What?
But aren't you upset?
You just stepped on my gum!
None of this would've happened without you.
Here's an invite.
It's a June wedding.
Wow, Tilly, you've changed
several people's lives for the better!
I'm confused,
are we still pretending to be bad?
I'm not pretending!
The good Tilly is gone.
This is who I am now.
-I have to do something bigger. -Bigger? Like what?
Something that only the most rotten of apples would do.
Steal.
Here you go, Gramma. Brought you some tea!
Precooled, of course.
Oh, aren't you sweet.
And I love that triple-braided
double basket weave.
It's elegant and modern.
Oh, thank you.
Here, come and snuggle with your Gramma.
Now that's a good boy.
So this is what it's like to be good.
Man alive, I've been missin' out.
What? What is this?
The boy is being a perfect little sweetheart,
-that's what. -It's true, father.
Need I remind you of earlier
when I was falsely accused
of getting mud in the house?
Key words being "false" and "-ly!"
Yeah, Bill, Cricket's helping out, actin' polite.
He even bathed for the first time in days.
-Weeks! -The boy deserves
some positive reinforcement.
Just look at him!
I guess everything going on with you kids
has me all topsy-turvy. You're right, Cricket.
I should've trusted you before and I should trust you now.
You're free to do whatever you want the rest of the day.
Whatever I want?
Hey, welcome to Sip 'N Snak.
Be cool!
Can I help you find anything?
-We're just browsing! -Uh-huh.
(goat beats)
Tilly, you can't steal, it's bad.
-This isn't like you. -Well, get used to it.
I know I'm not good. So if I'm not bad,
then what am I?
You're, uh--you're on your own.
I can't do this!
-(sobbing) -Hmph.
Well, I can do bad all by myself.
I just need to find somethin' small
that'll fit in my pocket.
(bell rings)
Hey!
I told you not to call me.
I'm supposed to be working.
I'm not interested in any of your wares, goodbye!
Forgot my goat.
All right. This thing is hot.
Let's just lay low and keep our cool.
(goat beats)
-Not speaking today. -Yeah, huh.
Okay. You're almost to your room,
no one is gonna find out.
-GLORIA: Hey, Tilly! -Don't arrest me, officer.
Whoa, Tilly. It's just me. Relax.
Cool outfit by the way. Did you steal that
from a rock star's closet or something?
Steal? Why would you even think that, Gloria?
Okay. Maybe the real thief here
is you after you stole your brain
from the crazy store, you ever think about that?
Phew. Look at yourself, Tilly.
You're mean to your family and friends.
You're lyin', you're stealin'.
-(ominous heartbeat) -Huh?
What... what is that?
What?
You're a bad person.
No, no. No, I don't wanna be bad anymore!
It's too late. You're already a bad girl!
No!
HEART CANDY DISPENSER: It doesn't matter
what you tell yourself.
We all know what a rotten person
you've become on the inside.
Ba-ba-barracuda-- I'm sorry, boss.
I'm not on my phone. Huh?
I'm... I'm sorry.
Uhh.
It was me.
I stole the candy heart dispenser
because I had to prove I was bad!
But then, I got home and it was just nightmares!
I deserve to be thrown to the Big House.
Take me away.
Uh, thank you
for bringing this back, I guess.
Just don't do it again.
You should also probably go.
Okay.
GRAMMA: Hey, Bill.
You happen to see my-- what the--
how many times do I gotta tell you?
If you're gonna wallow in despair,
do it outta the way!
Sorry, Gramma.
I just don't know what to do.
I failed at being good, so then I became bad.
But being bad doesn't feel good.
In fact, being bad feels really bad,
and I'm not even good at being bad!
I don't even know who I am anymore.
Oh, one of those. Come here.
Looks like it's a busy day for snuggling.
(dramatic music playing)
The world's full of a lot of weird garbage, Tilly.
Right and wrong, good and bad,
it's all mixed together and tough to tell apart.
But one mistake doesn't define your whole identity.
Take your mom for instance!
She made tons of mistakes.
Does that make her a bad person?
Well, no.
And you know who else has made mistakes?
All of these folks.
We've all screwed up a bunch of times,
but that doesn't make any of us bad people!
We're flawed just like anyone else!
Oh, except that little cutie on the end there.
She's perfect as she is.
And you're a good one too, Tilly.
Don't you forget it.
Thanks, Gramma.
Tilly, I have something to say.
Don't worry, Papa. I'm over my bad girl phase!
Oh, thank goodness.
Well, at least until I hit adolescence.
-Then all bets are off. -That's gonna be good.
Boy, it's hard for a parent to keep up sometimes!
Just look at Cricket!
He's been such a good kid all day!
Turns out, the best part of being good
is earning your family's trust.
So you can get away with doing bad stuff! Whoa!
I'm innocent. I swear.
Ah, forget it. I'll see myself to my room.
SINGER: ♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪
♪ Lost a bet and got bit by a hundred flies ♪
♪ I fell out a big ol' tree ♪
♪ Hit every branch and scraped up both my knees ♪
♪ I got chased by dogs ♪
♪ Licked by a frog Got a rash on my legs ♪
♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪
♪ I got splinters in seven of ten ♪
♪ And tomorrow, I'll do it all again ♪