♪ I'm carving in Grandma's house ♪
♪ Carving in Grandma's house ♪
♪ And waiting for my best friend! ♪
And there he is.
I'll get the door, Master Remy.
Ah, Remy's here, Remy's here, Remy's here!
- Hi, Cricket. - Uh, Remy, you gonna come outside?
Oh, yeah, sorry.
Do you require anything else today, Master Remy?
Perhaps your favorite, cucumber slices?
No, thanks, Vazquez.
I'm feeling mirabulous today,
and if I need anything,
I brought my No Limit credit card.
Flaunt yo stacks!
Very good, Master Remy.
[car door slams]
Wow, Remy, you're in rare form.
What was that thing you said?
Oh, hashtag flaunt yo stacks!
Just like Itchaboi says.
Itchy boy? Are you an itchy boy?
Grandma's got some lotion inside if you need any.
You haven't heard of Itchaboi?
Have you been living under a rock?
No.
Well, Itchaboi is my favorite social media influencer.
- Here, I'll show you a video. - [tablet beeps]
What's up, best friends?
It's your boy, Itchaboi!
All right, guys. It's flex on your haters Friday,
so you know I'm gonna list off everyone who's wronged me.
But first, it's time to hashtag flaunt yo stacks!
- Oh, hey, Itchy. - Cash slap!
[moans] Good one, Itchy!
I don't get it, he's just got a lot of money
and brags about it.
Nuh-uh, he gets real sometimes.
What's up, my precious peeps?
Are haters trying to offer you valid criticism?
If so, support my new initiative,
Negate The Hate.
And check out all my new mirabulous merch!
Link in the description!
You see there, he's just trying to sell stuff.
Wait, how did you...
Yeah, I can't help it.
He's so genuine, and I wanna support him.
Are you guys talking about Itchaboi?
Yeah!
Mirabulous for life!
Remy? Remy!
What has gotten into that young man?
Oh, hello.
What's this?
An endless portal to cat videos?
I may never close my eyes again.
Tilly, we've talked about this.
You have to blink.
Hm?
Sorry, Papa, I was just perusing some of the quality content
the internet has to offer.
Who's making these videos?
Anyone can make a video about anything.
Here's one you'd like, Papa.
Hey guys, today I'm gonna teach you
how to grout your tiles with a handy life hack.
First, plop some eggs on the floor,
and then add a little sand.
Finally, you've just gotta smear it around,
and really push in.
What is he doing? This is all wrong!
- [tablet beeping] - I'd like to lodge a complaint!
If you're upset about the video,
why don't you make your own?
Well, I'd love to spread proper information,
but I don't know how to make a video.
It's okay, Papa. I'll help.
I'll be your director.
What's up, my cherished homeys?
It's your boy Itchaboi!
I love you more than your parents ever will,
and I've got a real special treat for y'all.
Today, in Big City, I'm opening up the first ever
Hashtag Be Mirabulous pop-up store.
- Oh, I don't pay taxes! - [stanchion clinks]
[gasps] That's nearby!
We can take my limo!
Remy, what's going on?
Don't you wanna follow me around
and get into wacky antics like normal?
Uh, sorry, Cricket, but if we don't go now,
he's gonna burn all his merchandise that doesn't get sold.
Exclusivity!
So?
You wouldn't get it, Cricket,
You don't really like the internet or merch.
They're already out of posters!
We have to go now!
- Oh, come on, guys! - Flaunt your stacks!
- Come on! Oh, really? - Flaunt your stacks!
Really, come on. This is ridiculous.
Vasquez, don't you think Remy's
getting a little too into this nonsense?
I think Master Remy's having fun
and doesn't need you ruining it.
- Don't follow us. - Oh yeah, or what?
- You're gonna beat up a kid? - [harpoon gun cocks]
Huh? Wait, wait, what are you doing with that?
- [gun bangs] - Nope, you're good, whoa!
[Tilly] And we're rolling.
[clears throat] Hello, I'm BillGreen123,
and I'm going to show you the right way
to reapply grout.
Strap yourself in, because this is going to be a long
- and detail-oriented video. - [cat meows]
- Huh? - First and foremost,
make sure you've got your grout spreader, or a float,
- [bag crinkling] - as we call it in the biz.
[sneezes]
- [laughing] - [cat meows]
Uh, Tilly?
Am I still in the shot?
Papa, I've gotta be honest with you.
I don't think anyone's gonna watch this video.
But I'm speaking clearly and concisely about grout!
That may be true, but people nowadays
have short attention spans.
You've gotta keep them distracted with cats.
[meows]
Uh, if you say so.
Hi, I'm BillGreen123,
and this is our cat.
- Oop. - [cat meows]
Uh...
Here, let me help you there.
- [chomp] - [screaming]
Now remember, don't let any setbacks
keep you from getting the tile floor of your dreams.
This is gold.
[techno music playing]
[Remy] Look at that shirt!
I think we need to buy everything.
[grunts] Somebody's gotta talk some sense into Remy.
Whoa!
[camera snapping]
This costs $800.
Oh, yeah, now we're officially mirabulous!
Remy! [grunts]
Okay, look, I didn't wanna mess with your fun,
but I'm starting to feel like this whole thing is a scam.
Really, Cricket?
Now you just sound like one of Itchaboi's haters.
No, I'm not a hater.
I just feel very strongly that this Itchaboi guy
is stringing you along.
[all] Hater.
Okay, you three are hopeless,
but Remy, this isn't you.
You never cared about flanking your steaks or whatever
before this weirdo showed up.
You just don't get it, Cricket!
Itchaboi's message is about spreading positivity
by buying merchandise, so that other people know
how much positivity you're spreading.
Remy, buddy, you've gotta know how stupid that sounds.
I thought you were my friend!
But face it, Cricket, you a hater.
- [finger snaps] - Huh?
Whoa, Remy, wait!
I'm just trying to help!
Welcome, distinguished guests,
the world premier of Papa's Instructional Grout Video,
although I may have taken a few creative liberties.
Hello, I'm BillGreen123, and I'm going to show you
- the right way to reapply grout. - [distorted voice] Grout.
- [audience laughing] - To your kitchen tile.
- [cat meows] - Oop.
Uh...
Ugh.
- Here, let me help you. - [teeth chomp]
- [screaming] - [alarm ringing]
- Grout. - [horn honking]
- [screaming] - [siren blaring]
Grout.
[sneezes]
- [coughs] - [metal banging]
- [screaming] - What's this for now?
[float scraping]
[Bill] Grout.
[meowing]
Grout.
Made by Tilly.
So, what'd you think?
Well, I...
[laughing hysterically]
Anyway, the video is very interesting,
but where's all the grout information?
Oh, that stuff just wasn't playing.
I think this is what the people are gonna want to see.
Well, you're the director.
All right, I'm gonna go finish grouting the kitchen tile.
[laughing] I don't know what's wrong with Bill,
this is comedy gold!
What's good, my sweet buds.
You mean the world to me.
[cheering]
Now I know you all wish I was there,
but I couldn't make it, 'cause I'm tired.
I didn't sleep well last night.
Why?!
Anyway, I'm here to tell you about something even better,
The Mirabulous Crewse for my Mirabulous Crew!
Das yous.
My private party bus is waiting outside
to take you to the dock,
and once we're at sea, I promise, promise, promise,
you'll get to meet me.
[gasping] We get to meet Itchaboi?
And the best part is,
tickets are only $1 million!
- [all] Awe! - Oh, man, What?
I can't afford that.
Awe, Kiki, that's too bad.
For you!
Woo!
Listen, Master Cricket.
You are not allowed to talk to Master Remy.
Well, that's just fine, 'cause I wanna talk to you.
Isn't it your job to protect Remy?
Yes, so?
Well, Itchaboi is turning Remy into a brainwashed zombie
who will buy anything mirabulous,
and calls his friends haters.
That's ridiculous!
Master Remy is the sweet, loving, tender boy
we've always known.
Out of my way, losers!
Master Remy, where are you going?
I'm spending a million dollars to go live on a boat
with a stranger from the internet!
Also, you're fired!
Flaunt yo stacks!
Master Remy, wait, no!
[both panting]
Okay, I see what you were saying now.
If Remy spends all that time with Itchaboi,
he'll be lost forever.
We've gotta work together and stop him
from getting on that boat!
Okay.
- [bones crunching] - Yeow!
Papa, I'm really sorry about the...
Ah, I see you've tiled the whole kitchen.
I'm very passionate about grout.
That's why I'm here.
I wasn't a very good collaborator,
so I reedited the footage to include both our ideas.
To finish up, you've gotta tilt
at a nice 60 degree angle, and voila.
There you go!
Great job, everyone.
In my next video, I'll show you how to install drywall
- without the fuss. - [cat meows]
Awe, Tilly.
Heh, the original was better.
[Tilly] This has been a Billy Tilly Production.
What's this for now?
Hah, you kept that! [laughing hysterically]
Thanks, Tilly.
We make a good team.
[Grandma] Oh, my stitches.
[water bubbling]
[gasping] Was swimming really the best way to get here?
I needed to get my cardio in for the day.
Whoa!
Itchaboi, I'm here!
It's your best friend, Remy!
Hey, there he is.
Itchaboi, you here?
Yes I am, little dude.
In the fleshy-flesh.
Wow-wee, you're really here!
Whoa, no hugs yet, buddy.
Before I give you any sort of validation
for your behavior, $1 million.
Oh, yeah, anything for you, best friend!
[gasps]
No!
[grunts]
Hey, give me back my card!
Squad up, squad up!
[boys] What up, boy?
[gasps] Vasquez!
[boys grunting]
Go, Cricket! Get Master Remy off the boat!
Come and get it, Remy!
Wait!
Cash slap, cash slap, cash slap, cash slap!
Give me back my muns, you hater!
[grunting]
Come on, Remy. He's not your friend!
You're just an open wallet to him.
You shouldn't listen to Itchaboi.
And what? Listen to you instead?
Huh?
Cash slap, cash slap, cash slap!
[Vazquez grunts]
[boys yell]
Whoa!
[grunts]
[groans]
Master Cricket, what's the hold up?
[grunting]
Come on, little man, be mirabulous!
Now, negate him! Negate that hater!
- [groans] - Here, take it.
You shouldn't listen to Itchaboi or me.
You should do what makes you happy,
because I'll be your friend either way.
Ha, he's giving up!
Now let's party together, little man.
Just you, me, and that $1 million.
That's right, I'm gonna go
with the most mirabulous person I know.
Ha-ha, yes!
Cricket!
What? No!
Ha-ha, good to have you back, buddy!
Sorry, Itchaboi. It's been real,
but I know who my true friends are.
Ha, got'em!
I was a hologram the whole time!
Wow, what was I thinking?
What do you say we get out of here, best friends?
[cheering]
[distorted voice] Grout.
♪ I've got sweat in my eyes ♪
♪ Lost a bet and got bit by 100 flies ♪
♪ I fell out a big ol' tree ♪
♪ Hit every branch and scraped up both my knees ♪
♪ I got chased by a dog ♪
♪ Bit by a frog ♪
♪ Got a rash on my legs ♪
♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪
♪ I got splinters at seven and ten ♪
♪ And tomorrow I'll do it all again ♪♪