[theme song plays]
♪ One, two One, two, three ♪
[vocalizing]
everything's ready.
Tonight is your night with the kids.
Mom Night. I'm a mom.
You can do this. A nice, normal night
as a normal mom.
-[car horn honks] -Coming!
Don't mess this up.
-Hey, Bill. -Hey, Nancy.
-Mom! Whoop! -Hey, Mama!
Hey, two favorite people, Ticket and Crilly.
That's not our names.
You did that on purpose.
-You guys ready for Mom Night? -[both] Yeah!
Thanks again, Bill. Any big plans for your night off?
Yep. I'm gonna eat an entire hamburger.
By myself.
Well, bye, bye!
Good for him.
Can we open our eyes yet?
Not yet, not yet.
-Now? -Almost ready.
Ah! Hurry, Mom. I can't hold out much longer!
-Okay. Open 'em! -[both gasp]
Welcome to Mom Night!
We've got the snackiest of snack foods,
a giant stack of DVDs,
and a huge pile of lumpy pillows.
You personalized our sleeping bags!
These pizza rolls are really hot.
So, what do you think?
-Gr-reat, Mom. -Truly spectacular.
Glad to hear it. Now let's get Mom night started.
[rumbling, crashing] -[all exclaiming]
Oh, no! The worm people revolution has begun!
Quick, hide the pizza rolls!
[chuckles] Calm down, bud.
It's probably just... [gasps] Oh, no.
-Whoa! Who are these guys? -My old biker gang.
The Stingers.
Nancy Green!
It's been a long time.
Not long enough. Looks like everyone's here.
Skids, Leadfoot,
-Lord Chrome... -[roars]
and Dan.
Oh, hey, Nancy. How's it going?
Shut up, Dan! Nancy Green, we got beef!
-What do you want, Skids? -We heard you were out of jail.
Planted roots in Big City.
-So, we're here to settle the score. -[knuckles crack]
I'm done with all that. Now, why don't you get lost?
You're intruding on a night with my kids.
Sure, we'll leave. But we're taking that with us.
-Huh? -Sorry, Nancy!
-What? No! -[both grunt]
-Hey! -Let go of our mom!
-[both gasp] -[sinister chuckle]
No, no! Dang it, Dan!
Get back here!
[panting]
Sorry, Nancy. You know the rules.
You mess with the Stingers, you get stung!
[sinister laughter]
No! Mom's home!
-Fate has abandoned us. -Crab-nabbit.
Tonight was supposed to be perfect.
-I'm not giving up on Mom Night that easily. -[motorcycle engine roars]
Time to get that trailer back.
[tires squeal]
Right. My kids.
Guess we got to come with you, huh?
I don't know.
Or we'll stay outside,
-in the rain and cold. -Ah-choo.
All right, enough of that. Hop in.
-Whoo-hoo! -All right!
Now, let's go get our Mom Night back.
[both cheer]
So spill it, Mama.
How'd you acquire such a nasty slice of beef?
[sighs] It was a long time ago.
I was one of the Stingers' best racers.
-[all cheering] -Great, Nancy!
We were Big City's most feared and respected biker gang.
But eventually, I decided to give it all up
so that I could settle down
and start a little gang of my own.
Unfortunately, the Stingers took that
-as an act of betrayal and vowed revenge. -[growls]
My past has come back to haunt me.
Ah, the old Splish Factory.
I knew they'd be here.
Hmm. Got to do this fast.
I can't waste another second of Mom Night.
-Don't worry, Mom. We'll help. -Yeah!
All right, here's what we're gonna do.
-[both grunting] -[clattering]
Hey, Dan, find anything valuable in there?
Ah, just a couple of precious family photos.
Also these pizza rolls.
Ooh, still hot too! [groans]
-Huh? -Dan?
-A bottle cap? -[Cricket] Drink up, suckers!
[maniacal laughter]
[all exclaiming]
Mom, coast is clear!
Greens forever!
I'm king of the road!
-[engine sputtering] -Uh, second gear, Sweetie.
-Am I doing good, Mama? -Real good, hon.
-But keep your eyes open. -Yes, ma'am.
No! They're getting away! [growls]
Uh-oh. Gotta go!
Cricket, we're ready!
All right! [grunts, shouts]
Let's get outta here!
-Whoo-hoo! Ooh! -Whoa!
Did you really think I'd let you get away?
Huh? Kids! Whoa!
[both grunting]
Keep your grimy hands off of them!
Hey, Nancy, I still have your Crock pot.
-If you want it back, just let me know. -Shut it, Dan!
-I said, leave them alone! -[door opens]
Nancy, Nancy, Nancy. Don't you get it?
This trailer is the price you pay for leaving us.
It's mine now. Mine!
And... I can do whatever I want to it.
I could smash it apart if I wanted to.
In fact, I think I will!
-Skids, wait! -[shouts]
-No! -Stop!
You betrayed us. You betrayed me!
Double or nothing!
I'm listening.
A race. Double or nothing.
If I win, my debt is forgiven and I get my trailer back.
If you win, you get to keep the trailer and my--
Look, Nancy, I don't want your kids.
What? No. My bike. I meant my bike.
-Well? -[Cricket] Mom, no!
You can't get rid of your bike! It's one of a kind!
I've felt its power! It must remain in the bloodline!
Ol' Red, huh?
Can't pass up a prize that good.
Nancy Green, you got yourself a deal.
All right, Nancy, don't mess this up.
You've got to get Mom Night back on track.
For the kids.
Best say goodbye to that bike,
-'cause this is the last time you'll see it. -[Cricket] Oh, yeah?
Well, the last thing you'll see is...
my butt... when we pass you...
on the way to the finish... place.
We need to work on your trash talk, kiddo.
All right, listen up! The rules are simple, because there aren't any.
Nothing's out of bounds and nothing's off limits.
First one to pass through the Frog's Mouth wins!
-Three! -[engines rev]
-Two! -[sinister chuckle]
-[tires squeal] -What... Hey!
Aw, I didn't get to say "one."
[grunts, growls]
That sidecar's slowing you down.
This'll be easier than I thought!
Mama, she's fast!
True. But I'm faster.
-Great work, Mom! -Uh-oh!
-Hmm. -[all whooping]
[growls]
Whoa!
Hold on, kids!
Time for you to go home.
Oh, that's right--
-I have your home! -[all exclaiming]
[sinister laughter]
[grunts] That was a dirty trick. You okay, Tilly?
Yes. Good thing I was wearing a helmet.
Mm-hmm. How about you, Mom?
Oh, no! She's dead!
We just got her back, only to lose her again!
Calm down. I ain't dead.
I just can't believe I let Skids get the best of me.
That never used to happen.
Can't race, can't cut it as a mom...
who am I anymore?
Who are you? You're...
[grunting] a little heavier than I anticipated.
You're Nancy Green!
Look, I know you got a lot of complex adult thoughts going on,
and those are valid, but everything's on the line!
The trailer, your bike, and our Mom Night!
So you can't quit now! Right, Tilly?
Cricket, these were in my head!
Well said, Tilly. Listen, you got this.
Mom doesn't lose on Mom Night.
Also, sorry for yelling in your face.
[chuckles] I think I can let it slide.
Now, what do you say we finish this race?
-Yeah! -That's the spirit, Mama!
But how are we gonna catch up to Skids?
-[train horn sounds] -Hmm.
We take the train.
[all whooping, exclaiming]
[exclaiming shakily]
-[engine revs] -Oh! Are you kidding me?
-We closed the gap! -[All we gotta dook! It's tis make itMouth!
to the other side of the tunnel first, and we win!
Aah! The sidecar's too big!
-We won't be able to pass! -What are you gonna do?
What any mom would do in this situation--
put her kids first!
-[both yelling] -Huh?
[Tilly] Whoo-hoo!
-No! -Winner!
-[cheering] -That was so good, you guys!
[seethes] That doesn't-- I don't-- This is ridiculous!
Now, now, Skids.
A deal's a deal. So are we square?
-[growls] -Oh, come on, Skids.
I haven't seen racing like that in a while.
They deserve it!
Ah, why not?
I'd expect nothing less from Nancy Green. And her kids.
So consider the Stingers off your back.
Bye, Nancy! Your family is awesome!
Y'all ready to get Mom Night back on track?
-All right, let's... -[all gasp]
Dragged around town, lifted by a crane...
Of course this place is a mess.
Oh, sorry kids. Mom Night's a bust.
Are ya kidding me? Tonight was a blast!
Yeah. What makes Mom Night fun is spending time with you.
Wha...? You really mean it?
Come here, you two! Glad you had fun.
Though next time will probably just be a quiet night in.
Whatever it is, we'll be there.
Oh, look! There's one pizza roll left.
Bah! How are they still hot?
Great day atne.
We sold out of just about everything. Except for...
Please, oh please, don't say lima beans.
Lima beans! Just enough left for my lima bean stew.
-[all groan] -[buzzing]
-I'll get it! It's for me! -That's my phone!
Hello. Cricket Green speaking.
How do you know it's not for me?
Could be one of my friends!
Oh, hello, Remy.
[chuckles] You set yourself up for embarrassment there.
-So how's vacation, Remy? So good!
I saw like, 10 fishes,
and I'm drinking out of a coconut!
Vasquez, I'm ready for sun block now.
Wow! Sounds fun!
Yeah, but here's the thing.
I forgot to feed my pet snake, Snakey,
and since you know your way around my house,
I was hoping you could feed him.
[gasps] Go over to your house and feed your pet?
Dang. You sure must trust me a lot
to give me such a super-important task.
-Well, of course I trust you. -I graciously accept!
-Whoa, Cricket! -Got to make a pit stop, Dad!
Son, what are you... Aah!
Cricket, when I'm behind the wheel, Daddy's driving.
-Okay. Sorry. -[all oohing and ahhing]
-[Bill] This is Remy's house? -Holy moly.
I knew Remy was well off,
but I didn't realize he was this--
Loaded? Yes, yes, he sure is.
But I like to think Remy is loaded
with something better than gold-- my friendship.
You should be honored to have a son
who is trusted with so much.
Okay, I'll be right back.
If the outside is this nice, imagine the inside!
Do you want to go inside?
-Oh, no, no, no. That would be-- -Yes, of course.
Well, come on! Remy's mansion is my mansion today.
I don't know, son. Are you sure we should?
Family, don't worry.
Remy trusted me, and I say you can come on in.
Welcome to... Remy's house!
Pretty impressive, huh?
And to think we're all here because of me.
Oh, looky here. This is their robot butler.
Here ya go, boy. Here's a snack.
Yeah, the technology isn't really there yet,
-but it's still pretty cool. -[all] Wow!
-This is the elevator. -[electronic female voice] First floor.
-Second floor. -[all] Wow!
And check this thingy out. What do y'all want from Burger Clown?
-Did I hear three milkshakes? -Order up!
-Bingo-bango. -[all] Wow!
Well, enough dilly-dallying.
I got a super important job to do,
so make yourselves at home.
Look around. Go explore. Enjoy a bit of the high life.
Remy left me in charge, and I say, have fun.
I'll be back in a bit!
-[chuckling] -Whee!
[scoffs] This place ain't that nice. Bah!
What do you need all these doors for? You got something to hide?
[sarcastically] Oh, an indoor fountain.
I wouldn't be caught dead without one of these.
Ooh, two indoor fountains,
to save us from embarrassment if the first were to break.
Th-Three fountains?
Either they really really, really, like fountains, or...
I'm lost.
Wowee, this place sure is neat!
Cricket did say "make yourself at home."
So I think I will. Eeee!
There! What do you think, Beauford?
I know. It's a little fancy for our children's PTA meeting.
Error, error.
Well, ex-cyu-se me!
Oh. A collection of classic cars.
No! It can't be!
Four-ply balloon tires. Mint condition honky horn.
I can't believe it. an original Model B Kludge!
Still solid as a rock.
I guess it's true what they say-- "Kludge don't budge."
It even has the original rope seatbelt.
[snickering] Wait. What am I doing?
Playing around in the Remingtons' antique car? I... I....
-[Cricket's voice] Bill! -Who said that?
Down here!
Remember what I said?
Make yourself at home!
Live a little of the high life.
At home. Okay.
-Don't mind if I do. -[aooga horn honks]
Hey Snakey! I bet you missed me, huh?
-[angry hissing] -Whoa-ho! You missed me.
You must be hungry. How about some delicious
imitation mice?
Well, they can't be that-- Waah!
Oh, well. And now to do the one thing I came here for.
Wait, is that what I think it is?
[gasps] Remy's diary.
Well, Remy trusts me to feed his snake,
so I'm sure he trusts me with this too.
Hmm. Let's see. Boring, boring, boring.
"Dear diary, sometimes I like to imagine myself
growing up with big, big muscles."
Well it's good to have goals, I guess. Whoa!
I'm just gonna pretend I didn't see that.
Huh? Snakey! Hey!
One spin around the driveway never hurt nobody.
She rides like a dream!
Yoo-hoo! Yee-haw! Yeah!
Hey, lady! Like my ride?
[chuckles] That was fun.
I'll just ease the brakes...
No foot brake? It must be a hand bra-a-ke.
No. No!
Oh! Where's the brake? Where's the brake?!
Oh, no, no! I can't stop this thing!
[screams]
-These eggs are no good. -[knock at door]
-Hello? -Hello. I live next door,
and I heard a man screaming in your yard!
Yeah. What's the deal with all the noise?
I was in the middle of a very expensive spray tan!
Harumph, harumph! What is all that noise?
Where are the Remingtons? And who are you? Time is money!
Uh, I'm, uh...
Tilly! Remember what I said?
Make yourself at home.
Live a little of the high life.
The Remingtons... died.
[all gasp]
I mean, they moved to Antarctica!
I am Honey Belle Sweet Tea.
I'm having a little housewarming soiree,
as this is my home now.
So please do come in.
Aah, I'm lost!
How long have I been here? Days? Weeks?
Everything looks the same!
Dang it, Alice, you only got a finite amount of time left.
You will not spend it here!
I need something to leave a trail with.
No.
No!
Yes!
If I see one more horrible thing
in this freaky rich-person house, I will...
Huh? [screams]
Snakey, where are you? What the... Bah!
I told everyone to make themselves at home,
Not to make themselves a mess!
[grunting]
Wait. Something about this feels familiar.
[screams]
-Snakey! What the heck? -[people laughing]
Yes, yes. It's all very rich and fancy.
Tilly? What's going on here?
Who is this "Tilly" you speak of?
My name is Honey Belle Sweet Tea.
What? What are you talking about?
My word! Is that an unfortunate?
-What? -Yes, yes.
Just rattle your jewelry, and he'll run away.
[gasping, exclaiming]
Tilly, what the heck's gotten into you? Snakey!
Get back here!
You were my one job!
-Get back here, you... [screams] -Look out!
-[gasps] -Son, I was playing
in the Remingtons' car, and now I can't stop it!
Wait, I think I found the brake.
Aah! That-- oh, geez--
wasn't-- oh, my-- the brake!
Aah! What have I done?
I just had to go show off and let my family in.
Of course the splendor went to their heads.
-[phone rings] -Huh?
Honey Belle Sweet Tea. How rich are you?
No! Give me that! Remington residence. Everything's fine.
Hey, Cricket. Good news. We're coming home.
-What? -Dad got bit by a crab, and now he hates the beach.
Vasquez, fly faster! I'll not rest
until that beach is but a distant memory!
So now you don't have to worry about feeding Snakey anymore.
Well, you see, Remy, that's kind of a problem,
because everything's a disaster!
Tilly's gone crazy, Dad's in a runaway car,
and Gramma-- Where is Gramma?
[sobbing]
Oh, Remy, it's a real mess. You never should've trusted me.
Cricket, listen, I trusted you to feed Snakey
not because you never mess anything up,
but because I know even when things go really, really wrong,
you always find a way to fix it.
-And I'm trusting you to do that now. -Oh, gee, Remy, I--
Also, if you don't, we'll be in big trouble with my Dad, Cricket!
-Big, big trouble! -Aah! Okay, okay.
I'll stall them! You can do this!
Yes, I can, Remy. Yes, I can.
-[all laughing] -I've got it!
My word, Honey Belle. Toss the Vase is possibly
the most thrilling game I've ever played!
Aw, I wanted to see the big vase go smash-smash.
Reveal yourself, dark stranger!
It is I, Monty Montgomery,
billionaire extraordinaire!
Oh, Monty,
My second cousin, twice removed!
Honey Belle, I came to warn you that these rapscallions
intend to steal your fortune!
Steal my fortune?
Be gone! Out, I said!
-[all clamoring] -Problem solved.
Sorry I lost control there, brother.
It's good to have you back, Tilly.
Now go clean up your dang mess! The Remingtons are coming!
-Aah! Right away! -Oh, got to find Dad!
[screaming]
Dad!
Son, I'm so sorry I got carried away!
We all did. Now, how do we stop this thing!
I don't know! The controls aren't anything like my Kludge!
[gasps] Your Kludge.
What about my Kludge?
Son, I told you, when I'm driving--
"Kludge don't budge." That's the saying, right?
You're right! You're darn right!
[both shouting]
It stopped! We did it!
[sniffles] Neither of 'em budged.
Okay, you put away the truck! I gotta find Snakey!
-Snakey? -Thanks, lady!
[grunts]
Snakey, where are ya, buddy?
[gasps] Snakey! Come on down here, bud!
-[angry hiss] -Gaah! Oh, no.
And I haven't even fed Snakey. [gasps] Hold that thought!
[grunts]
Dad, I think I left my phone at the beach!
I am not facing that crab again. We'll buy you a new phone.
Oh, Dad, I'm growing up so fast! Hold me like the old times!
-Remy, what are you doing? -Hey, Snakey.
I know those biscuits ain't too appetizing,
so how about a nice, big,
juicy mouse?
-[hisses] -Yaah!
Huh? Just kidding.
Biscuits for you.
Remy, now is not the time to--
Oh, the Green family? What are you doing here?
Uh, Remy asked us to feed his snake while you guys were away.
We were just taking him for an afternoon slither.
Wow! How responsible!
That's us-- the responsible, trustworthy Green family.
-[yelling] -Error. Error. Error.
All right, let's go home.
♪ I lost a bet and got bit By a hundred flies ♪
♪ And I fell out A big, old tree ♪
♪ Hit every branch And scraped up both my knees ♪
♪ A got chased by a dog Bit by a frog ♪
♪ Got a rash on my legs Dropped a dozen eggs ♪
♪ I got splinters At seven and 10 ♪
♪ And tomorrow I'll do it all again ♪