1 00:00:02,126 --> 00:00:05,963 Now this is what I call an authentic medieval costume. 2 00:00:05,963 --> 00:00:08,716 I’ll say. Your mother bought it from the history museum. 3 00:00:08,716 --> 00:00:10,134 It’s priceless, dear. 4 00:00:10,134 --> 00:00:12,220 So wear a bib if you’re going to eat. 5 00:00:12,220 --> 00:00:13,387 Vasquez! 6 00:00:13,971 --> 00:00:14,972 [grunts] 7 00:00:14,972 --> 00:00:17,350 A bib for Master Remy. 8 00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:18,434 You look different. 9 00:00:18,434 --> 00:00:20,895 Why aren’t you wearing your customary sweater vest? 10 00:00:20,895 --> 00:00:23,356 I, Sir Remy Remington, 11 00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:26,234 am attending the community center’s annual medieval party. 12 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,402 We dress up how they did in the olden times. 13 00:00:28,402 --> 00:00:30,696 Then I must select a costume at once. 14 00:00:32,448 --> 00:00:33,491 I’m ready. 15 00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:34,867 Oh, you don’t need to come. 16 00:00:34,867 --> 00:00:36,244 I’ll be fine on my own. 17 00:00:36,244 --> 00:00:37,829 You without a bodyguard? 18 00:00:37,829 --> 00:00:40,289 Good one, Master Remy. [laughs] 19 00:00:40,289 --> 00:00:42,917 Actually, we think he’s earned some independence. 20 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:45,253 We’re benching you, man. Take the night off. 21 00:00:45,253 --> 00:00:46,462 You hear that, Vasquez? 22 00:00:46,462 --> 00:00:51,759 [slowing] I don’t need you anymore! 23 00:00:51,759 --> 00:00:54,428 [echoing] ...anymore. ...anymore. 24 00:00:54,428 --> 00:00:56,139 [Rashida] Oh, look, the Greens are here. 25 00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:59,684 - Good morrow, Lord Remington. - How fare ye? 26 00:00:59,684 --> 00:01:02,937 [Vasquez] He doesn’t need me? He doesn’t need me? 27 00:01:02,937 --> 00:01:06,691 Well, I must be off. My chariot awaits! 28 00:01:06,691 --> 00:01:08,067 [Vasquez] Ah! Wait! 29 00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:10,236 Master Remy... Oh! 30 00:01:10,236 --> 00:01:12,697 [groans] 31 00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:14,157 - Vasquez? - Vasquez? 32 00:01:14,157 --> 00:01:16,075 - Vasquez? - [both] Vasquez? 33 00:01:16,075 --> 00:01:18,327 [groans] What happened? 34 00:01:18,327 --> 00:01:19,662 You had a panic attack. 35 00:01:19,662 --> 00:01:21,414 Attack? Where? Who? 36 00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,666 No, no, we’re talking about anxiety. 37 00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:25,668 You got blitzed by your own brain. 38 00:01:25,668 --> 00:01:27,587 We thought you might want somebody to talk to, 39 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:30,173 so we called our mobile therapist. 40 00:01:31,174 --> 00:01:32,592 Therapist? 41 00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:35,136 - Good luck, buddy. - Hope you feel better. 42 00:01:35,136 --> 00:01:36,596 [sighs] 43 00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:38,347 It’s nice to meet you, Vasquez. 44 00:01:38,347 --> 00:01:40,099 My name is Dr. Maya Bloom, 45 00:01:40,099 --> 00:01:43,603 and this is a safe space to be vulnerable. 46 00:01:43,603 --> 00:01:44,729 - Hmph! - Now, 47 00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:46,564 what brings me in today? 48 00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:49,775 The Remingtons are trying to keep me from doing my job! 49 00:01:49,775 --> 00:01:51,861 And I take it that wounded you? 50 00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:54,655 Wounded? Do I look like I’m bleeding? 51 00:01:54,655 --> 00:01:56,407 Not on the outside, no. 52 00:01:56,407 --> 00:01:58,826 But when we care about someone and they hurt us, 53 00:01:58,826 --> 00:02:01,412 we feel it in our hearts just as deeply. 54 00:02:01,412 --> 00:02:03,164 Don’t you have someone you care about? 55 00:02:03,164 --> 00:02:04,248 Huh? 56 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:06,792 Master Remy. 57 00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:11,005 I almost die at least once a day trying to protect him. 58 00:02:11,005 --> 00:02:14,467 He hangs with a well-meaning, but very reckless country boy. 59 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:15,927 I see. 60 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:18,262 Now tell me, how did you and Remy meet? 61 00:02:18,262 --> 00:02:21,098 It was late one night, many moons ago. 62 00:02:22,099 --> 00:02:24,727 I was working with my former brotherhood. 63 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,147 A group of mercenaries called... 64 00:02:28,147 --> 00:02:29,440 [all grunt] 65 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,150 ...the Order of the Fang. 66 00:02:31,150 --> 00:02:33,945 Wait, so you were a criminal? 67 00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:36,405 Lady, is this a safe space or not? 68 00:02:36,405 --> 00:02:38,407 It is. Please continue. 69 00:02:38,407 --> 00:02:40,576 [thieves panting] 70 00:02:40,576 --> 00:02:43,079 [Vasquez] We heard a Big City couple were in possession 71 00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:45,915 of our ancient scroll of dark secrets. 72 00:02:45,915 --> 00:02:48,876 They purchased it from a natural history museum 73 00:02:48,876 --> 00:02:50,670 to include in their personal collection. 74 00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:52,296 They are very wealthy. 75 00:02:52,296 --> 00:02:54,131 The lost scroll! 76 00:02:54,131 --> 00:02:55,591 Viper Fang, I found it. 77 00:02:55,591 --> 00:02:57,677 Good work, Tiger Fang. 78 00:02:57,677 --> 00:02:59,262 [Vasquez] Little did we know... 79 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:00,429 [door handle rattling] 80 00:03:00,429 --> 00:03:02,056 ...we were in for a surprise. 81 00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:03,349 - [crying] - Uh-oh. 82 00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:04,850 Somebody’s ready for bed. 83 00:03:04,850 --> 00:03:06,185 They’re back early. 84 00:03:06,185 --> 00:03:08,479 Fangs, shadow formation. 85 00:03:08,479 --> 00:03:11,399 Russ, why don’t you grab that ancient scroll Remy likes 86 00:03:11,399 --> 00:03:12,942 from the gallery? 87 00:03:12,942 --> 00:03:14,944 [Russell] Kid loves that thing like a blankie. 88 00:03:15,778 --> 00:03:17,196 There it is. 89 00:03:17,196 --> 00:03:18,781 This thing is cool. 90 00:03:18,781 --> 00:03:19,907 [hums] 91 00:03:19,907 --> 00:03:21,784 [gasps] The scroll. 92 00:03:21,784 --> 00:03:23,661 [whimpering and crying] 93 00:03:23,661 --> 00:03:25,204 [Russell] Here you go, bud. 94 00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:27,415 Our beautiful little nerd. 95 00:03:27,415 --> 00:03:29,542 I love him so much. 96 00:03:30,459 --> 00:03:31,836 Now’s our chance. 97 00:03:31,836 --> 00:03:33,129 Excellent. 98 00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:35,047 [grunting] 99 00:03:35,047 --> 00:03:36,882 Baby, you must give me the scroll. 100 00:03:36,882 --> 00:03:38,676 [straining] 101 00:03:38,676 --> 00:03:39,927 [cries] 102 00:03:39,927 --> 00:03:43,431 - Shh! Here! Here! - [coos] 103 00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:46,017 The baby’s cries will alert his parents. 104 00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:48,311 No matter. Take the baby as well. 105 00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:49,520 Take him? 106 00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:52,982 The first time I picked up Master Remy, 107 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:55,234 - I knew. - [cooing] 108 00:03:55,234 --> 00:03:58,654 He was the most pure, innocent being I had ever seen. 109 00:03:58,654 --> 00:04:01,657 The true embodiment of all things good. 110 00:04:01,657 --> 00:04:02,950 - [Remy giggling] - Huh? 111 00:04:02,950 --> 00:04:05,244 Come on, Tiger Fang. What’s the holdup? 112 00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:07,663 I don’t think we should take him. 113 00:04:07,663 --> 00:04:10,166 Why not? The baby will love the Order. 114 00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:14,295 And if it doesn’t, we’ll throw it in the dungeon until it does. 115 00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:15,546 What? What are you doing? 116 00:04:15,546 --> 00:04:17,214 I can’t explain it, 117 00:04:17,214 --> 00:04:19,467 but I feel in my heart this baby must follow 118 00:04:19,467 --> 00:04:21,010 a different path. 119 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:22,470 [coos and blows raspberry] 120 00:04:22,470 --> 00:04:24,305 But, Tiger Fang. The scroll! 121 00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:25,848 Forget the scroll. 122 00:04:25,848 --> 00:04:28,392 I have always followed the ways of the Order, 123 00:04:28,392 --> 00:04:31,562 but this time, I must do things my way. 124 00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:33,647 I cannot let you take the infant. 125 00:04:33,647 --> 00:04:37,193 [gasps] The Master will be most displeased with your betrayal. 126 00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:38,861 So be it! 127 00:04:38,861 --> 00:04:41,155 [whistles] Well, boys. 128 00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:43,574 Looks like the objective’s changed. 129 00:04:43,574 --> 00:04:45,284 Eliminate Tiger Fang! 130 00:04:45,284 --> 00:04:47,244 [grunting] 131 00:04:50,331 --> 00:04:51,332 [growls] 132 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:52,416 [yells] 133 00:04:58,005 --> 00:05:00,257 - [cooing] - [blows landing] 134 00:05:01,509 --> 00:05:02,718 - [grunts] - Ah! 135 00:05:05,763 --> 00:05:07,723 Come on, Tiger Fang. 136 00:05:07,723 --> 00:05:10,810 You’d really throw everything away for this stinky baby? 137 00:05:12,311 --> 00:05:13,896 - What’s going on in here? - [gasps] 138 00:05:13,896 --> 00:05:15,564 [Rashida] They have Remy! 139 00:05:15,564 --> 00:05:16,941 [toy squeaks] 140 00:05:16,941 --> 00:05:18,025 Uh-oh. 141 00:05:18,025 --> 00:05:19,193 [grunting] 142 00:05:19,193 --> 00:05:20,778 Get back! 143 00:05:20,778 --> 00:05:22,905 Huh? 144 00:05:22,905 --> 00:05:24,490 No, no, no-- Whoa! 145 00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:27,159 [giggles] 146 00:05:27,159 --> 00:05:29,328 - [both gasp] - He’s good. 147 00:05:29,328 --> 00:05:31,664 Here you go, little guy. 148 00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:33,499 It’s no use. 149 00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:36,627 - Oh, no! - Save our baby, mysterious stranger! 150 00:05:36,627 --> 00:05:39,338 The child is ours! [hisses] 151 00:05:39,338 --> 00:05:41,841 No, he’s not! 152 00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:44,885 Ah! I’m lactose intolerant! 153 00:05:47,138 --> 00:05:49,306 [all scream] 154 00:05:49,306 --> 00:05:51,809 [Viper Fang] This isn’t over, Tiger Fang! 155 00:05:53,727 --> 00:05:56,021 Hey, man, you know how to kick some butt. 156 00:05:56,021 --> 00:05:58,899 You saved our precious baby boy. 157 00:05:58,899 --> 00:06:01,068 How can we ever repay you, Mister... 158 00:06:01,068 --> 00:06:04,321 The name is Tiger F-- Uh... Vasquez. 159 00:06:04,321 --> 00:06:07,533 Well, Mr. Tigerfuhvasquez-- 160 00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:08,909 Can I just call you Vasquez? 161 00:06:08,909 --> 00:06:10,578 - Mm. - Cool. 162 00:06:10,578 --> 00:06:14,039 Seeing how you expertly protected our son from all that danger, 163 00:06:14,039 --> 00:06:16,459 we’d love to hire you as a bodyguard. 164 00:06:16,459 --> 00:06:17,793 I accept. 165 00:06:17,793 --> 00:06:19,462 From this day onward, 166 00:06:19,462 --> 00:06:23,716 I will be there for him. Always. 167 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:26,177 Master Remy was too young to remember that night. 168 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:29,388 - But ever since then, I kept my word. - Whee! 169 00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:33,225 [children laughing] 170 00:06:33,225 --> 00:06:36,520 I was the barrier between him and imminent danger. 171 00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:38,439 - Hyah! - [squawks] 172 00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:41,358 He’s never known life without me by his side. 173 00:06:41,358 --> 00:06:42,735 Hmm, that’s true. 174 00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:44,945 You’ve protected him, taught him many things 175 00:06:44,945 --> 00:06:46,113 and helped him grow. 176 00:06:46,113 --> 00:06:47,865 Yes! You get it. 177 00:06:47,865 --> 00:06:50,576 And now you’re coming to terms with that reality 178 00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,953 that he’s ready to go and do some things on his own? 179 00:06:52,953 --> 00:06:55,789 No! You don’t get it. He needs me. 180 00:06:55,789 --> 00:06:57,541 I must protect him always. 181 00:06:57,541 --> 00:06:59,168 - [watch beeps] - [gasps] Oh, no. 182 00:06:59,168 --> 00:07:00,920 Master Remy’s sweat tracker. 183 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:05,257 His skin moisture level went from clammy to glistening. 184 00:07:05,257 --> 00:07:08,010 Master Remy’s in danger. I must go to him. 185 00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:10,137 But our session isn’t over. 186 00:07:10,137 --> 00:07:11,472 Then we must go to him. 187 00:07:15,476 --> 00:07:16,977 ♪ Whisk, O thee merry ♪ 188 00:07:16,977 --> 00:07:18,729 ♪ Thy feet, they be weary ♪ 189 00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:20,689 ♪ For a cuda named Barry ♪ 190 00:07:20,689 --> 00:07:21,941 [hums] 191 00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:23,817 My royal subjects, 192 00:07:23,817 --> 00:07:27,029 your queen is not pleased with having to wait in line 193 00:07:27,029 --> 00:07:29,532 like some kind of basic pleb! 194 00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,617 Why, greetings, Your Majesty. 195 00:07:31,617 --> 00:07:33,077 As your lady-in-waiting, 196 00:07:33,077 --> 00:07:36,038 it is my sacred duty to wait in this line 197 00:07:36,038 --> 00:07:37,998 for your red sugary beverage. 198 00:07:37,998 --> 00:07:39,291 Prithee, away. 199 00:07:39,291 --> 00:07:42,670 Thanks, Tilly. I will prithee away. 200 00:07:42,670 --> 00:07:43,879 It’s a living. 201 00:07:43,879 --> 00:07:45,881 Okayeth, Remy. 202 00:07:45,881 --> 00:07:49,301 Getteth ready for a noodle inneth your noggin. 203 00:07:49,301 --> 00:07:53,138 I, the esteemed and chivalrous Sir Remy Remington, 204 00:07:53,138 --> 00:07:54,974 accept your challenge! 205 00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:57,560 Now mount thine steed! 206 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:02,398 Vasquez, are you familiar with the term "helicopter parent"? 207 00:08:02,398 --> 00:08:03,983 No! Come. 208 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:05,693 This way. 209 00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:07,278 Master Remy? 210 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:08,946 Hmm. 211 00:08:10,447 --> 00:08:12,616 Master Remy! Jousting? 212 00:08:12,616 --> 00:08:13,784 Cricket? 213 00:08:13,784 --> 00:08:15,953 It’s going downeth! 214 00:08:15,953 --> 00:08:18,372 [gasps] Nobody told me he’d be competing 215 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:20,124 in a dangerous sporting event. 216 00:08:20,124 --> 00:08:21,292 [growls] 217 00:08:23,210 --> 00:08:25,254 [laughing] 218 00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:27,172 I will protect you, Master Remy, 219 00:08:27,172 --> 00:08:29,008 from any harm that shall befall you. 220 00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:30,843 No matter what. 221 00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:33,220 No matter what! 222 00:08:33,220 --> 00:08:35,556 Vasquez, let’s think about this. 223 00:08:35,556 --> 00:08:38,475 [both yelling excitedly] 224 00:08:38,475 --> 00:08:40,686 [gasps] No! 225 00:08:40,686 --> 00:08:43,939 I could have saved him! [sobs] 226 00:08:43,939 --> 00:08:46,609 Focus, Vasquez. You’re close to a breakthrough. 227 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:49,111 I’ll break through anything to protect Master Remy. 228 00:08:49,111 --> 00:08:50,904 Starting with this glass! 229 00:08:50,904 --> 00:08:52,656 Hold on. Look at Remy. 230 00:08:52,656 --> 00:08:54,700 Does he really look like the helpless boy 231 00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:56,535 you saved from danger so long ago? 232 00:08:56,535 --> 00:08:57,620 Huh? 233 00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:59,163 [groaning] 234 00:08:59,163 --> 00:09:00,706 [laughs] Hark! 235 00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:03,959 Let us continue in our revelry! 236 00:09:03,959 --> 00:09:06,420 So it’s true. 237 00:09:06,420 --> 00:09:09,423 Master Remy really doesn’t need me anymore. 238 00:09:09,423 --> 00:09:11,258 - [sobs] - [party favors blowing] 239 00:09:11,258 --> 00:09:12,801 Exactly. 240 00:09:12,801 --> 00:09:15,012 Congratulations, Mr. Vasquez. 241 00:09:15,012 --> 00:09:17,806 [whimpering] This is a good thing? 242 00:09:17,806 --> 00:09:19,933 Well, it certainly is a natural thing. 243 00:09:19,933 --> 00:09:22,269 Relationships can grow and change. 244 00:09:22,269 --> 00:09:23,771 Even bodyguarding ones. 245 00:09:23,771 --> 00:09:25,105 - [watch beeps] - Oop! 246 00:09:25,105 --> 00:09:26,857 Well, looks like our time is up. 247 00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:29,693 - Goodbye, Vasquez. - Huh? 248 00:09:29,693 --> 00:09:31,111 [gasps] Huh? 249 00:09:31,111 --> 00:09:33,864 If you’d like to chat again, you have my card. 250 00:09:33,864 --> 00:09:36,116 Wait! Wait! I don’t understand. 251 00:09:36,116 --> 00:09:37,785 What do I do now? 252 00:09:41,163 --> 00:09:43,666 Oh, please, after thee. 253 00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:46,585 And after thee. Oh, after thee. 254 00:09:46,585 --> 00:09:48,837 I am the lady-in-waiting. 255 00:09:48,837 --> 00:09:50,839 [sighs] ’Tis bliss. 256 00:09:50,839 --> 00:09:52,383 Sir Vasquez! 257 00:09:52,383 --> 00:09:54,343 Thou should’ve seeneth it! 258 00:09:54,343 --> 00:09:57,554 I, Sir Remy, ’twere master of the joust! 259 00:09:57,554 --> 00:10:00,307 Sure, Cricket had lanced me a few times, 260 00:10:00,307 --> 00:10:02,935 but that hath made it all the more jovial. 261 00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,937 Whateth can I sayeth? 262 00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:06,814 I’m very glad you had a good time 263 00:10:06,814 --> 00:10:08,649 all on your own, Master Remy. 264 00:10:08,649 --> 00:10:10,859 You didn’t need me after all. 265 00:10:10,859 --> 00:10:12,444 I did miss you, though. 266 00:10:12,444 --> 00:10:13,862 I still want you around, 267 00:10:13,862 --> 00:10:15,781 even if I don’t need you. 268 00:10:15,781 --> 00:10:17,825 Really? 269 00:10:17,825 --> 00:10:19,451 I understand now. 270 00:10:19,451 --> 00:10:22,162 I don’t need to protect you all the time, 271 00:10:22,162 --> 00:10:24,665 but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna lose you. 272 00:10:24,665 --> 00:10:25,958 Of course not! 273 00:10:25,958 --> 00:10:28,043 You may not always be my bodyguard, 274 00:10:28,043 --> 00:10:30,879 but you’ll always be my buddyguard. 275 00:10:30,879 --> 00:10:32,798 [laughs] Oh! 276 00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:41,265 ♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪ 277 00:10:41,265 --> 00:10:44,309 ♪ Lost a bet, got bit by 100 flies ♪ 278 00:10:44,309 --> 00:10:47,563 ♪ I fell out a big old tree ♪ 279 00:10:47,563 --> 00:10:50,315 ♪ Hit every branch And scraped up both my knees ♪ 280 00:10:50,315 --> 00:10:52,735 ♪ I got chased by a dog ♪ 281 00:10:52,735 --> 00:10:54,153 ♪ Licked by a frog ♪ 282 00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:55,696 ♪ Got a rash on my leg ♪ 283 00:10:55,696 --> 00:10:57,865 ♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪ 284 00:10:57,865 --> 00:11:01,493 ♪ I got splinters in seven of ten ♪ 285 00:11:01,493 --> 00:11:04,163 ♪ And tomorrow I’ll do it all again ♪