1
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,302
All right, try it again.
2
00:00:12,179 --> 00:00:14,348
Did you even look at the engine
before you bought this thing?
3
00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:17,017
No, but the guy said it once belonged
to Val Kilmer, so...
4
00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:20,062
Oh, well even Val Kilmer can't drive
with a busted starter engine.
5
00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:21,480
Why do you hate Val Kilmer?
6
00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:25,901
Hard to believe they're finally
replacing you on Call Carter.
7
00:00:25,984 --> 00:00:27,361
Whoa. Nobody's replacing me.
8
00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:29,905
- Nobody used the term "replace."
- Oh yeah? What word did they use?
9
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:32,783
They can call it whatever they want.
I quit them. Remember?
10
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:34,409
I loved my time on Call Carter,
11
00:00:34,493 --> 00:00:36,453
but that's in the rear view,
and I'm fine with that.
12
00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:38,080
All right, as long as you're happy, buddy.
13
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:39,248
Of course I'm happy.
14
00:00:39,331 --> 00:00:42,000
If I wasn't, I wouldn't have agreed
to take this new kid on a ride along
15
00:00:42,084 --> 00:00:45,587
and show him
how a real detective operates.
16
00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:47,506
Oh, here he is now.
17
00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:48,715
Hey, who is this guy, anyway?
18
00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:52,427
Some kid they found doing dinner theatre
in Minneapolis or something.
19
00:00:52,511 --> 00:00:55,222
I'm gonna give him the kind of leg up
every newcomer deserves.
20
00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:57,474
- You have a big heart, Harley Carter.
- I've got a big everything.
21
00:00:57,558 --> 00:01:00,102
- Okay. Except for ankles.
- Do not have big ankles.
22
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:03,105
You know there's no exercise
that properly targets the anks?
23
00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:06,233
- Harley! My main man!
- Vijay!
24
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:08,777
- What's up, squirt?
- Nothing much, nothing much.
25
00:01:09,528 --> 00:01:11,029
Surprise!
26
00:01:18,954 --> 00:01:20,539
David Arquette?
27
00:01:23,542 --> 00:01:26,211
Look. They were gonna go with a no name,
28
00:01:26,295 --> 00:01:28,755
but at midnight last night,
David Arquette said he would be willing
29
00:01:28,839 --> 00:01:30,799
to take the part if they backed
a money truck up to his house.
30
00:01:30,883 --> 00:01:33,552
My understanding is they literally backed
a truck up to his house.
31
00:01:34,178 --> 00:01:35,721
No, it's...it's fine.
32
00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:39,224
It's just not where I would have gone
casting-wise, but...
33
00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:41,643
- I'll help out any way I can.
- Okay, good.
34
00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:42,936
You're a big man, Harley Carter.
35
00:01:43,020 --> 00:01:44,980
Harley freakin' Carter!
36
00:01:46,732 --> 00:01:50,944
Oh! I cannot wait to pick your brain.
37
00:01:51,028 --> 00:01:55,699
I'm gonna get so deep inside there,
I'm gonna impregnate your soul.
38
00:01:59,286 --> 00:02:02,080
- All right, I'm off.
- Whoa. Where are you going?
39
00:02:02,164 --> 00:02:03,498
There-- there is trouble
40
00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:05,751
on the set of Lady Cop,
so I gotta go to that.
41
00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:08,545
I just...
I'll see you in a couple of days, okay?
42
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,380
I'm Dave. I'm a huge fan.
43
00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,424
You were the best part of Scream 2,
hands down.
44
00:02:12,508 --> 00:02:14,092
- Have to say.
- Thanks!
45
00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:16,762
I can tell you're a fan
by the crazed look in your eyes.
46
00:02:16,845 --> 00:02:19,181
But listen, I brush my teeth
just like you do.
47
00:02:19,264 --> 00:02:22,643
I just have a little guy there named
Mr. Pippers who holds my brush.
48
00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:28,440
- So this is where the magic happens.
- Yeah.
49
00:02:28,524 --> 00:02:31,485
The beating heart of law enforcement
resides behind those doors.
50
00:02:31,568 --> 00:02:32,945
Small town PD.
51
00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:35,155
What, do you guys have one gun
and just pass it around?
52
00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:39,826
Hey, I can teach you what I know,
but you need to check that attitude.
53
00:02:39,910 --> 00:02:44,665
This is a place of work. A temple.
Respect it, and it will respect you back.
54
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,208
I got it. Respect.
55
00:02:47,209 --> 00:02:48,210
Let's do this!
56
00:02:52,381 --> 00:02:53,841
What up, Bishop?
57
00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:57,177
David Arquette in the house!
58
00:02:57,261 --> 00:02:59,721
Hey, it's David Arquette! Hands off!
59
00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:01,473
David, David!
60
00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:08,105
Is that what it was like
when you came back?
61
00:03:09,064 --> 00:03:11,650
It was way worse,
I was just never into that stuff.
62
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:12,985
Love and adulation?
63
00:03:13,068 --> 00:03:15,779
No, I was always about the work.
Always about the work.
64
00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:17,030
Get your hands off me! It's David!
65
00:03:17,114 --> 00:03:19,074
That's the no name replacing you
on your TV show?
66
00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:21,535
Whoa, nobody is replacing anyone
67
00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:23,662
and yes, it's David Arquette.
68
00:03:24,413 --> 00:03:25,664
All right, guys.
69
00:03:26,248 --> 00:03:30,544
- Does anybody have any work to do, or...
- You should probably get back to work.
70
00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:33,297
Come on. No...
71
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:34,840
I need some me time, all right, guys?
72
00:03:34,923 --> 00:03:37,009
I'll get to each and every one of you,
I promise.
73
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:41,138
- Who are you?
- Oh, Detective Shaw.
74
00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:48,520
Harley never told me that
you were replacing him on his show! What?
75
00:03:48,604 --> 00:03:50,522
It's David Arquette!
76
00:03:50,606 --> 00:03:54,568
The golden age of television meets
the golden age of Arquette it's perfect.
77
00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:57,779
Although we're gonna make
the show a lot grittier this year.
78
00:03:57,863 --> 00:04:00,365
Like, real stories
from the streets, not like,
79
00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:01,742
what they were doing before.
80
00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:02,826
Totally.
81
00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:04,369
- Heh, yeah.
- We were a top 30 show
82
00:04:04,453 --> 00:04:09,791
on WGN America every year I was there
so we must be doing something right.
83
00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:12,461
Yeah, but you know that old saying,
84
00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:15,005
if everyone loves you,
you must be doing something wrong?
85
00:04:20,886 --> 00:04:24,556
So I'm just here to ride along
and learn from the pros.
86
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:25,641
Like you, for instance.
87
00:04:25,724 --> 00:04:29,770
Wow, I thought you were here
to study Harley.
88
00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:32,856
Nah, I get inspiration from everywhere.
89
00:04:32,940 --> 00:04:34,066
- I'm an artist, you know?
- Yeah.
90
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,485
I can't turn it off. God just...
91
00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:39,821
made me too talented. Yeah.
92
00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:42,366
- I don't know if that's arrogant to say--
- Yes.
93
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:43,825
Watch this.
94
00:04:46,912 --> 00:04:49,790
Who wants a lap dance from David Arquette?
95
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,212
So this is where the party's at?
96
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,506
- Simone!
- Hey!
97
00:04:57,589 --> 00:04:59,508
How are you? What's up?
98
00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:01,343
- I want some of this!
- Oh my! The shirt!
99
00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:03,554
Look at that print! Oh my goodness.
100
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:04,972
What are you doing here?
101
00:05:05,055 --> 00:05:07,474
Did I just hear somebody yell
"It's David Arquette?"
102
00:05:07,558 --> 00:05:11,061
Oh, yeah, it is David Arquette.
So lame, right?
103
00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:14,690
Have you seen that boy wrestle
in his teeny-weeny man panties?
104
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:16,859
Lame is not the word I'd use.
105
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:19,736
- Wrestling is fake.
- Oh...I'm guess I'm leaving now.
106
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:21,446
Give us a minute.
107
00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:26,577
Simone's back!
108
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,705
- I haven't heard from you in months!
- You don't return my texts?
109
00:05:29,788 --> 00:05:32,583
I have to rely on social media
to know if you're alive!
110
00:05:37,379 --> 00:05:41,717
- See? Now that's a greeting.
- So what happened to-- what...
111
00:05:42,259 --> 00:05:43,385
Where was it?
112
00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:44,928
- Miami?
- Miami?
113
00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:47,306
Girl, it has been a long time
since we've talked.
114
00:05:47,389 --> 00:05:48,682
Buy me lunch and I'll give you
the whole story?
115
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:52,311
- No, I can't, I'm at work.
- Same old Sam. What time do you get off?
116
00:05:52,394 --> 00:05:54,605
- When work is done?
- Okay.
117
00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:57,649
- Let's meet later.
- No, I'm not staying at your place.
118
00:05:57,733 --> 00:05:59,401
- Of course you are.
- Absolutely not.
119
00:05:59,484 --> 00:06:01,320
- No! I'm not staying at your house, Sam!
- Of course you are! Are you kidding me?
120
00:06:01,403 --> 00:06:02,529
- Remember last time? I was trying
- You're staying at my place.
121
00:06:02,613 --> 00:06:04,364
- to redecorate and you freaked out
- You're staying at my place!
122
00:06:04,448 --> 00:06:06,200
- and cried.
- I am not debating this.
123
00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:09,119
All right, get some rest.
And I will see you tonight.
124
00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:11,455
Just 'til I figure out
where I'm going to stay.
125
00:06:12,581 --> 00:06:14,583
- Welcome home.
- What's the Wi-Fi situation?
126
00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:18,337
- We were having such a nice moment.
- Well, it was so slow last time.
127
00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:20,756
- Why do you do that every time?
- I've gotta download my shows.
128
00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:23,008
"To Mrs. Rafalski, stay sexy!
129
00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,635
Deputy Dewey."
130
00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:28,263
Scream is my wife's favourite movie,
she's gonna flip!
131
00:06:28,347 --> 00:06:29,765
Well, that's the right reaction.
132
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:32,184
Hope you get some!
133
00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:34,478
All right, everybody.
134
00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:38,941
Mr. Arquette is our guest, and I know it
will be an inconvenience, and...
135
00:06:39,024 --> 00:06:40,776
annoying at times,
136
00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:45,239
but let's give him whatever he needs
and show him what great hosts we are.
137
00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:47,407
Well, I'm just here to see
how real cops...
138
00:06:47,491 --> 00:06:48,742
get 'er done!
139
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:50,285
That's not funny.
140
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,580
You know, in Hollywood,
we get a lot of awards,
141
00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:55,999
but I want you to know
what you're the real heroes,
142
00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:57,251
give yourself a hand!
143
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:05,634
Now let's go save a cat from a tree
or give a lawnmower a ticket,
144
00:07:05,717 --> 00:07:08,637
whatever backwoods nonsense
you do around here!
145
00:07:09,513 --> 00:07:12,933
Listen up! Got a report of a body
washed up on Collins Sound.
146
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:16,562
Oh...drowned and found.
147
00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:18,981
Drowned and found.
148
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:22,901
Nice one, David Arquette!
149
00:07:23,527 --> 00:07:24,903
Keep 'em coming.
150
00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:28,490
Is it okay if I hate him
just a little bit?
151
00:07:29,366 --> 00:07:32,744
He may be a pampered Hollywood star,
but over the next two days,
152
00:07:32,828 --> 00:07:35,914
I'm gonna turn David Arquette
into a true detective,
153
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:37,207
even if it kills him.
154
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,711
Don't you mean "even if it kills you?"
155
00:07:41,587 --> 00:07:42,754
I know what I meant!
156
00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:06,236
Carter
157
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:14,828
Unbelievable.
158
00:08:18,999 --> 00:08:20,000
Come on...
159
00:08:20,584 --> 00:08:22,586
- Yeah, let's do this!
- Dude, where have you been?
160
00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:24,671
- I've been here fifteen minutes.
- I had to change.
161
00:08:24,755 --> 00:08:27,841
- You had to change for this?
- Yeah, it's my crime scene look.
162
00:08:27,925 --> 00:08:30,219
Unbelievable. Okay, whoa. Careful.
163
00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:33,639
Easy there, okay?
This is very important, crossing the tape.
164
00:08:33,722 --> 00:08:35,390
You mess this up,
it ruins the whole scene.
165
00:08:35,474 --> 00:08:37,059
- Okay.
- My technique...
166
00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:40,479
I like to use hand, neck, body follows.
Okay?
167
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:43,065
Hand, neck, body follows, step. Try it.
168
00:08:43,941 --> 00:08:45,484
Hand, neck, body follows.
169
00:08:45,567 --> 00:08:46,777
- Step, that's it.
- That's it? Okay.
170
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:47,945
Very important.
171
00:08:50,781 --> 00:08:51,907
Rafalski!
172
00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:55,160
- What is this?
- That's crime scene tape.
173
00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:56,912
To secure the perimeter
of the crime scene.
174
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:59,373
How many times have I told you,
this is way too tight!
175
00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:00,916
No one else complained.
176
00:09:00,999 --> 00:09:02,417
He's here!
177
00:09:03,293 --> 00:09:06,421
Hey, everyone, can you just stop
what you're doing for a sec?
178
00:09:06,505 --> 00:09:10,300
It's an old Hollywood tradition
that the lead gets the crew
179
00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:12,886
something extravagant on the first day.
180
00:09:12,970 --> 00:09:17,057
Just to establish loyalty and dominance,
so I got you a coffee truck!
181
00:09:18,100 --> 00:09:21,019
Yeah, guys!
So help yourselves, and remember!
182
00:09:21,103 --> 00:09:24,648
Don't spill anything on your costumes,
these wardrobe girls will kill ya.
183
00:09:25,858 --> 00:09:28,235
- Did you cater a crime scene?
- Yeah, you don't?
184
00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:30,404
No! This is not a set!
185
00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:33,156
- These are not actors, they're people.
- Tell me about it!
186
00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:36,285
We should cast some real hot cops
for some motivation.
187
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:44,459
Okay, listen up.
188
00:09:45,878 --> 00:09:48,797
Welcome to "Dead Men
Tell Some Tales" theatre.
189
00:09:48,881 --> 00:09:51,842
So, storm surge brought
the body up on the beach,
190
00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:54,428
but we do not believe
that the deceased drowned.
191
00:09:54,970 --> 00:09:58,223
If he had, he would have been
bloated once he resurfaced.
192
00:09:58,307 --> 00:10:01,268
This man was dead
before he entered the water.
193
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:03,061
Okay?
194
00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:08,150
Yeah...oh yeah.
195
00:10:09,151 --> 00:10:13,530
Okay...All right, yeah.
196
00:10:15,908 --> 00:10:17,492
We're circling.
197
00:10:17,576 --> 00:10:20,662
We're scrutinizing.
We're letting the body tell us a story.
198
00:10:20,746 --> 00:10:22,080
Talk to me, baby.
199
00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:23,916
Oh, yeah.
200
00:10:24,875 --> 00:10:27,085
- Everybody's staring at us.
- It's okay.
201
00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:34,301
We got some ligature marks
around the ankles.
202
00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:35,928
That means that this man was deceased
203
00:10:36,011 --> 00:10:39,223
before he hit the water
or they would have to weigh him down.
204
00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:41,892
- Nice anks, too.
- You know, there's no exercise
205
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:43,268
that properly targets the anks.
206
00:10:43,352 --> 00:10:45,020
Oh, we got a broken leg,
207
00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:48,148
which means that this man
was not tossed from a boat.
208
00:10:48,232 --> 00:10:50,567
Everyone knows that if you hit the water
209
00:10:50,651 --> 00:10:53,278
from a high altitude, it's...
it's like hitting concrete.
210
00:10:53,362 --> 00:10:55,489
Isn't this the part where you're
supposed to come up
211
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:58,784
with a big line that launches
the investigation in the right direction?
212
00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:02,454
No, David. No. Never force it.
Only if it comes organically.
213
00:11:03,038 --> 00:11:07,292
Therefore...I conclude...that this man...
214
00:11:07,918 --> 00:11:09,586
fell from the sky!
215
00:11:14,258 --> 00:11:16,134
I don't think that's gonna make the cut.
216
00:11:16,218 --> 00:11:18,220
He fell from the sky.
217
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,056
Harley's theory was right on the money.
218
00:11:21,139 --> 00:11:23,851
You know, I was gonna say
he fell from the sky too.
219
00:11:23,934 --> 00:11:26,103
He has an incision
at the back of his hairline
220
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,397
likely made from a thin-bladed knife.
221
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:30,607
Brain was dead before he hit the water.
222
00:11:30,691 --> 00:11:33,110
Crushed vertebrae, shattered pelvis,
223
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:36,029
totally consistent with an injury
from a great big fall.
224
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:38,282
Good hair, detective. Work!
225
00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:42,369
I said "hair." I meant to say "work,"
but I was thinking hair.
226
00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:45,414
Oh, and I found this in his suit jacket.
227
00:11:45,497 --> 00:11:48,125
He has nothing else on him.
I think it's a bird.
228
00:11:48,709 --> 00:11:53,297
It's a Thunderbird.
Anishinaabe design, specifically Ojibwa.
229
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,757
How did something like this end up
in pin stripe's pocket?
230
00:11:55,841 --> 00:11:58,969
Well, I think I know where we can go
to get an answer to that question.
231
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:01,889
Oh, she's good. What else has she been in?
232
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,560
Okay, I have to go talk to someone now,
233
00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:10,731
so you say nothing, you touch nothing,
you do nothing.
234
00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:14,151
You are untrained and ill-equipped,
so you stay in the car.
235
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:15,736
Great.
236
00:12:19,907 --> 00:12:21,366
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Where are you going?
237
00:12:21,450 --> 00:12:23,493
Sam said stay in the car, man!
238
00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:26,872
I can't learn anything in the car!
239
00:12:26,955 --> 00:12:28,248
I need my boots on the ground.
240
00:12:28,332 --> 00:12:33,587
I need to feel things, and touch things,
and taste things, smell things.
241
00:12:33,670 --> 00:12:35,547
You wouldn't understand.
242
00:12:35,631 --> 00:12:37,132
But...
243
00:12:45,516 --> 00:12:49,603
He just put that in his mouth.
Was I ever like that?
244
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:52,523
Well, you still do an uncomfortable
amount of tasting, let's just say that.
245
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:53,899
- Do we go get him?
- No.
246
00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,526
I need a minute without that guy.
247
00:12:55,609 --> 00:12:58,237
And that is how it's done. Acting!
248
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:00,364
- Hey!
- Hi.
249
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:04,826
Sorry, I...I'm just supposed
to be waiting in the car.
250
00:13:04,910 --> 00:13:06,078
I probably should do that.
251
00:13:09,665 --> 00:13:10,707
Open the door!
252
00:13:12,251 --> 00:13:14,127
- Open the door!
- Can I help you?
253
00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:16,129
Can you please just open the door?
254
00:13:16,213 --> 00:13:18,715
I thought you had to touch,
taste, and smell stuff.
255
00:13:18,799 --> 00:13:20,259
I did. I did, thank you.
256
00:13:20,342 --> 00:13:22,636
And now there's a very large man coming.
257
00:13:24,012 --> 00:13:25,138
I got this.
258
00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:30,435
- What up, Waab?
- The big man!
259
00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:33,438
- Bakwa!
- Sam!
260
00:13:33,522 --> 00:13:37,150
- Wow! Hey, how you doing?
- Good, how are you?
261
00:13:37,234 --> 00:13:38,986
- Hollywood!
- Hey!
262
00:13:41,113 --> 00:13:43,323
- Oh, and this is,
- David Arquette.
263
00:13:43,407 --> 00:13:45,075
- Of course.
- Hey.
264
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:47,286
Everyone knows who David Arquette is.
265
00:13:47,369 --> 00:13:49,955
- Muppets From Space. Oh, yeah.
- I was also in A Very Muppet Christmas.
266
00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:52,708
I also presented Kermit
with his star on Hollywood Boulevard.
267
00:13:52,791 --> 00:13:55,460
We're really tight. I'm not bragging.
268
00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:59,548
I went to the Victoria's Secret
Christmas show. It was good.
269
00:13:59,631 --> 00:14:01,592
So I was hoping you could help me
with something.
270
00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:02,843
Look at this. What do you make of that?
271
00:14:02,926 --> 00:14:05,220
It was handmade, by somebody who knew
what they were doing.
272
00:14:05,304 --> 00:14:06,305
Didn't get this in a gift shop.
273
00:14:06,388 --> 00:14:09,641
I thought of you because you gave me
one of these once.
274
00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:12,686
Said it was one of a kind, like me.
Will you ask around?
275
00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:14,188
Would that make me
part of your Scooby gang?
276
00:14:14,271 --> 00:14:19,818
We are hiring if this whole seaplane
business crashes and burns.
277
00:14:20,986 --> 00:14:23,947
Sorry, that didn't sound so dark
when I said it in my head.
278
00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:27,492
So the thing is,
we found it on a dead guy.
279
00:14:27,576 --> 00:14:29,036
Now that was dark.
280
00:14:29,119 --> 00:14:31,246
I'll keep my ear out,
help in any way I can.
281
00:14:31,330 --> 00:14:33,207
Okay. Thank you. We know you're busy.
282
00:14:33,290 --> 00:14:37,002
Not for you, Sam.
But yes, things are going well.
283
00:14:37,085 --> 00:14:39,546
Getting better every day,
a lot on the horizon.
284
00:14:39,630 --> 00:14:42,549
If things keep going this way,
we should go on an old school road trip.
285
00:14:42,633 --> 00:14:45,344
- May have a line on some Lions tickets.
- Okay!
286
00:14:45,427 --> 00:14:47,346
- Hope to see you soon, sunshine.
- Yeah.
287
00:14:47,429 --> 00:14:48,847
Hollywood, a moment.
288
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:53,977
- He meant me.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
289
00:14:55,145 --> 00:14:58,732
- I'm from Hollywood, too.
- So, you and Sam.
290
00:14:59,441 --> 00:15:00,943
Me and Sam what?
291
00:15:01,568 --> 00:15:02,903
That's what I thought.
292
00:15:04,154 --> 00:15:05,864
You know she's amazing, right?
293
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,033
I may have clocked that.
294
00:15:08,116 --> 00:15:11,578
You two seem to have
some chemistry going there.
295
00:15:11,662 --> 00:15:14,331
Yeah, Sam and I have,
like, grade five chemistry.
296
00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:16,291
- But you two?
- We're friends.
297
00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:18,627
You know my uncle has a saying.
298
00:15:19,211 --> 00:15:20,838
Listen or your tongue will make you deaf.
299
00:15:20,921 --> 00:15:22,548
I'm sorry, I have no idea what that means.
300
00:15:22,631 --> 00:15:26,343
It means stop flapping up these,
start listening to this.
301
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:27,845
It's already a done deal, brother.
302
00:15:52,578 --> 00:15:55,706
Hey, you guys ever weigh down a body?
Yeah, me neither.
303
00:15:55,789 --> 00:15:58,917
- I'm sure it's not as easy as it looks.
- We're not talking Waab, are we?
304
00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:01,712
No, but maybe somebody who works for him?
305
00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:04,631
I think it's time we paid a little visit
to the AHM.
306
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:20,314
- Hi.
- Hi.
307
00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:22,024
I'm on the clock right now.
308
00:16:22,107 --> 00:16:23,817
That's the only reason
you're still standing.
309
00:16:27,613 --> 00:16:30,115
Want us to hold your jacket
while you kick their butts?
310
00:16:30,199 --> 00:16:33,118
Nah, those guys are just proof
that the lowest common denominator
311
00:16:33,202 --> 00:16:34,870
just found the basement.
312
00:16:34,953 --> 00:16:36,747
How do you know he wasn't whistling at me?
313
00:16:39,124 --> 00:16:41,418
Excuse me. Can we ask you a question?
314
00:16:44,129 --> 00:16:45,547
I got him!
315
00:16:45,631 --> 00:16:47,966
- What the...
- Not if I get there first!
316
00:16:48,926 --> 00:16:50,844
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah!
317
00:17:08,487 --> 00:17:10,531
I'd say freeze, but you beat me to it.
318
00:17:10,614 --> 00:17:11,865
Yeah!
319
00:17:15,911 --> 00:17:18,664
I already told you, I don't know nothing
about no dead man on no beach!
320
00:17:19,331 --> 00:17:20,791
And even if I did, I'm not talking.
321
00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:22,292
You can go ahead
and arrest me or whatever,
322
00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:25,879
but I'm a lot more afraid of him
than I am of you any day.
323
00:17:25,963 --> 00:17:28,465
Him? Who is him?
324
00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:32,261
Listen, I don't know
if this is the right time,
325
00:17:32,344 --> 00:17:34,888
but I'd really like to treat you all
to dinner after wrap.
326
00:17:36,932 --> 00:17:42,062
Sorry, again, that I can't hang,
but this dinner was kind of last minute.
327
00:17:42,145 --> 00:17:43,355
We'll have time.
328
00:17:43,981 --> 00:17:46,108
- That's what you're wearing?
- What? this is...
329
00:17:46,191 --> 00:17:49,444
- this is my "going out" outfit!
- Okay, you took me in.
330
00:17:49,528 --> 00:17:51,363
Let me at least be your glam fairy.
331
00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:59,246
So how long do you think
you're gonna be staying here?
332
00:17:59,788 --> 00:18:02,374
- What's your game plan for...
- Unbelievable.
333
00:18:02,457 --> 00:18:05,085
Couldn't even wait one day
before you start picking apart my life.
334
00:18:05,169 --> 00:18:06,628
- What are you talking about?
- "What's your game plan?"
335
00:18:06,712 --> 00:18:10,299
Oh, yeah, I'm the worst,
sorry I forced you to stay with me, too.
336
00:18:10,382 --> 00:18:11,675
- What a bitch.
- No, no.
337
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:15,596
One needs a plan in life,
and since I do not currently have one,
338
00:18:15,679 --> 00:18:17,264
I'll be looking to acquire one.
339
00:18:22,644 --> 00:18:23,729
Are you kidding me?
340
00:18:23,812 --> 00:18:26,982
This looks like if our set designer
transformed our police station
341
00:18:27,065 --> 00:18:30,736
for a very special episode of Call Carter,
"Carter Gets a Colonoscopy."
342
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:32,654
Hey, if you guys wouldn't mind moving
just a tad to your right,
343
00:18:32,738 --> 00:18:34,781
I'm trying to keep
Mr. Arquette's eye line clear.
344
00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:37,075
Who's the new cop? A little saucy.
345
00:18:37,159 --> 00:18:39,286
Apparently he's an assistant director.
346
00:18:39,369 --> 00:18:41,538
Arquette had him flown up
from Montreal to work the dinner.
347
00:18:41,622 --> 00:18:44,583
Oh, you gotta admit, though.
That chocolate fountain is on point.
348
00:18:44,666 --> 00:18:46,835
No, it's obscene! It's all obscene.
349
00:18:46,919 --> 00:18:49,880
I wish Boyle was here to see
what happened to his precinct.
350
00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:51,215
Do you? Really?
351
00:18:51,757 --> 00:18:53,759
I guess you're right, I don't.
352
00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:05,604
Well, thanks. I was going for "wow."
353
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:08,148
So the mechanic still won't talk,
354
00:19:08,232 --> 00:19:10,192
and I tried to reach Wabakwa,
but he's gone.
355
00:19:10,275 --> 00:19:12,277
- Nobody knows where he is.
- You don't think Waab's involved in this?
356
00:19:12,361 --> 00:19:13,779
- I don't buy it.
- No, me neither.
357
00:19:13,862 --> 00:19:17,157
Wabakwa is many things,
but a bad guy is not one of them.
358
00:19:17,241 --> 00:19:20,285
Speaking of bad guys. David Arquette.
359
00:19:20,369 --> 00:19:22,538
Buying everyone's affection.
360
00:19:22,621 --> 00:19:24,289
Can I admit something to you guys?
361
00:19:24,373 --> 00:19:25,832
- Sure.
- Yeah, lay it on us.
362
00:19:26,667 --> 00:19:29,378
I'm having a real hard time
with this whole re-cast thing.
363
00:19:29,461 --> 00:19:30,879
I mean, I knew one day they would move on.
364
00:19:30,963 --> 00:19:33,215
I just never thought they would, move on.
365
00:19:33,757 --> 00:19:36,552
I'm feeling replaced.
Are people just gonna forget about me?
366
00:19:36,635 --> 00:19:38,136
Look.
367
00:19:38,220 --> 00:19:41,974
David Arquette is rich, super famous,
and everybody loves him.
368
00:19:42,057 --> 00:19:43,058
- I mean...
- Loves him.
369
00:19:43,141 --> 00:19:45,269
Eight Legged Freaks
is a seriously underrated film.
370
00:19:45,352 --> 00:19:47,771
- Great pep talk, Dave.
- No, not finished.
371
00:19:48,397 --> 00:19:51,942
Because you know what he'll never be?
He'll never be Harley Carter.
372
00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:56,780
Because Harley flippin' Carter
is irreplaceable and unforgettable.
373
00:19:58,991 --> 00:20:00,492
Oh, you guys are the best.
374
00:20:01,451 --> 00:20:02,953
And so am I.
375
00:20:03,745 --> 00:20:05,289
These Okies know how to party.
376
00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:07,499
Jokes on him because I just ordered
377
00:20:07,583 --> 00:20:10,002
a hundred chocolate soufflés
from Schimm's Bakery.
378
00:20:10,085 --> 00:20:12,671
Cost me a fortune, but he's not
the only one who can throw around cash.
379
00:20:12,754 --> 00:20:15,757
Those chocolate goodies
are about upstage him!
380
00:20:17,009 --> 00:20:18,135
Hey, what's up?
381
00:20:19,011 --> 00:20:20,345
Okay, we'll be right down. Guys!
382
00:20:20,429 --> 00:20:22,890
That was Delilah. They ID'd the body
from the beach. Let's go.
383
00:20:23,557 --> 00:20:25,684
Sam!
384
00:20:25,767 --> 00:20:28,896
Sam! I ordered those chocolate soufflés,
and I prepaid.
385
00:20:28,979 --> 00:20:30,063
They cost me a fortune!
386
00:20:30,772 --> 00:20:33,317
We have identified this man
as Pete Zahradnik,
387
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:36,862
a drug capo out of Duluth, Minnesota.
Meth, dope, heroin.
388
00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:40,657
Question, how does a goon
from Duluth end up dead in Bishop?
389
00:20:40,741 --> 00:20:41,742
Answer!
390
00:20:43,285 --> 00:20:46,830
- Does anyone have an answer?
- Well, I may have an answer.
391
00:20:46,914 --> 00:20:48,207
Sorry to ruin your little evening.
392
00:20:48,290 --> 00:20:50,792
Though it would have been nice
for an invitation.
393
00:20:50,876 --> 00:20:52,377
Would have worn a great dress.
394
00:20:52,961 --> 00:20:55,923
So I usually do a CT scan
of the whole body to see the areas
395
00:20:56,006 --> 00:20:59,593
that I haven't dissected,
and this time I found an anomaly.
396
00:20:59,676 --> 00:21:01,678
Didn't notice before
because of all the trauma.
397
00:21:02,262 --> 00:21:03,597
Follow me.
398
00:21:08,310 --> 00:21:12,022
Well...this is how this works.
399
00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:14,233
It's not difficult.
400
00:21:17,069 --> 00:21:19,780
But it is not easy.
401
00:21:19,863 --> 00:21:21,782
Stay with me. Here we go.
402
00:21:29,414 --> 00:21:30,624
Check it.
403
00:21:38,090 --> 00:21:40,008
Looks like a wilting flower.
404
00:21:40,092 --> 00:21:42,386
Looks like a dog licking a star.
405
00:21:42,469 --> 00:21:44,304
Or another Anishinaabe symbol.
406
00:21:44,388 --> 00:21:46,640
The question isn't what are we looking at.
407
00:21:46,723 --> 00:21:49,601
The question is why was this thing down
a dead man's throat?
408
00:21:51,854 --> 00:21:52,980
Why?
409
00:21:58,652 --> 00:22:00,863
Hey. You okay?
410
00:22:03,073 --> 00:22:04,700
Simone?
411
00:22:04,783 --> 00:22:07,411
She's just so...messy!
412
00:22:07,494 --> 00:22:10,956
- What like, clothes everywhere, messy?
- Oh, her clothes are everywhere.
413
00:22:11,039 --> 00:22:14,293
But no, just she is the real mess.
414
00:22:14,376 --> 00:22:15,794
She ditched me, Dave.
415
00:22:15,878 --> 00:22:18,672
I put my life on hold
to take care of our mother
416
00:22:18,755 --> 00:22:21,425
so she could go do whatever.
417
00:22:22,301 --> 00:22:24,887
And now, that things don't work out,
I'm supposed to just...
418
00:22:24,970 --> 00:22:27,431
clean up her mess? Like always?
419
00:22:27,514 --> 00:22:29,933
Yeah. She needs you, Sam.
420
00:22:30,809 --> 00:22:32,811
Responsibility isn't exactly her
strong suit.
421
00:22:32,895 --> 00:22:35,272
Well, what if I'm tired of being
the responsible one?
422
00:22:35,355 --> 00:22:37,816
I'm tired of worrying about
everybody all the time.
423
00:22:37,900 --> 00:22:41,862
My sister, my job, my friends,
you, Harley.
424
00:22:42,905 --> 00:22:43,947
How is Harley?
425
00:22:44,615 --> 00:22:48,118
Yeah, everyone fawning over Arquette
makes him feel a little less special.
426
00:22:49,161 --> 00:22:51,997
- Yeah, not a match made in heaven.
- No.
427
00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:54,374
Oh, great, there you are.
428
00:22:54,458 --> 00:22:55,792
Come see what we've been working on.
429
00:22:55,876 --> 00:22:57,336
Prepare to be impressed.
430
00:22:57,419 --> 00:23:01,548
Okay. What if the drawing that we pulled
from Zahradnik's throat
431
00:23:01,632 --> 00:23:03,175
wasn't a drawing at all?
432
00:23:03,258 --> 00:23:04,510
But it was a clue?
433
00:23:04,593 --> 00:23:06,637
Okay, he knew he was gonna get got,
434
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:09,932
and he wanted to leave something
for us to find,
435
00:23:10,015 --> 00:23:13,352
and we have just been looking
at it sideways.
436
00:23:13,435 --> 00:23:15,938
David, marker. Thank you.
437
00:23:18,565 --> 00:23:22,277
Okay. David, go get it.
438
00:23:22,361 --> 00:23:24,988
Here we go. It is actually...
439
00:23:25,739 --> 00:23:30,244
a criminal map to the stars,
Great Lakes edition!
440
00:23:30,327 --> 00:23:33,789
Okay, here we go.
We got star #1 over here.
441
00:23:33,872 --> 00:23:37,376
That is Zahradnik,
that's our low-level Mafioso.
442
00:23:37,459 --> 00:23:40,003
We know that he pushes and moves drugs.
443
00:23:40,087 --> 00:23:41,797
If this is a mob movie, he's the patsy.
444
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:45,133
He's the guy that the mob boss kills
just to show that he's in charge.
445
00:23:45,217 --> 00:23:46,885
Probably played by David Arquette.
446
00:23:46,969 --> 00:23:49,763
Oh, thanks!
I never get cast in those roles.
447
00:23:49,847 --> 00:23:55,352
Then, we got star #2,
that is our guy Waabakwa.
448
00:23:55,435 --> 00:23:59,147
He's got a new seaplane business,
he's trying to get new clients.
449
00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:02,609
He finally gets a new one,
he doesn't ask too many questions.
450
00:24:02,693 --> 00:24:05,988
In our mob movie, he's the innocent guy
who just gets in over his head.
451
00:24:06,071 --> 00:24:10,075
That's also played by me 'cause
those are the kind of roles I usually get.
452
00:24:10,158 --> 00:24:12,744
Finally, the star of our movie...
453
00:24:14,413 --> 00:24:15,414
star #3.
454
00:24:15,497 --> 00:24:17,124
Spaghetti and meatballs.
455
00:24:17,207 --> 00:24:19,042
Are you trying to tell us you're hungry?
456
00:24:19,126 --> 00:24:21,336
Or insane, because message received.
457
00:24:21,420 --> 00:24:25,841
Guys, high-school road trip.
458
00:24:25,924 --> 00:24:31,889
Ciccoritti's Restaurante,
the best pasta puttanesca we've ever had!
459
00:24:32,890 --> 00:24:34,558
- Detroit.
- Yes!
460
00:24:35,851 --> 00:24:39,062
Lions! Waabakwa said he had a line
on some Lions tickets.
461
00:24:39,146 --> 00:24:41,315
That's the football team in Detroit.
462
00:24:41,398 --> 00:24:44,526
That's what he was referring to!
Harley, you did it!
463
00:24:46,111 --> 00:24:49,156
- We did it.
- We did it 'cause I got the marker
464
00:24:49,239 --> 00:24:51,992
and some gum from Rafalski's desk.
465
00:24:52,075 --> 00:24:54,953
- But what does it mean?
- Well, maybe Waab and Zahradnik
466
00:24:55,037 --> 00:24:56,413
were in business with someone
from Detroit?
467
00:24:56,496 --> 00:25:00,584
It's some sort of Great Lakes
drug-smuggling triangle?
468
00:25:00,667 --> 00:25:02,377
Okay, here's what's going to happen.
I'm going to scour
469
00:25:02,461 --> 00:25:04,963
all of the law enforcement
databases in Detroit
470
00:25:05,047 --> 00:25:06,924
- for anything on Zahradnik.
- What am I gonna do?
471
00:25:07,007 --> 00:25:08,967
Replace Rafalski's gum.
472
00:25:09,051 --> 00:25:10,552
Guys!
473
00:25:10,636 --> 00:25:14,932
All right, I have narrowed it down
to three likely suspects.
474
00:25:15,974 --> 00:25:17,309
That one!
475
00:25:17,392 --> 00:25:19,019
He was one of the guys
that whistled at Sam.
476
00:25:19,102 --> 00:25:20,604
He was at the marina.
477
00:25:20,687 --> 00:25:21,772
I was hoping it wasn't him.
478
00:25:21,855 --> 00:25:24,483
That is Mick "The Blade" Keywell,
out of Detroit.
479
00:25:24,566 --> 00:25:26,443
Total psychopath,
and I mean that clinically.
480
00:25:26,527 --> 00:25:30,614
He was diagnosed by a doctor
who he later killed, with a blade.
481
00:25:30,697 --> 00:25:32,533
Still, "Blade"? Pretty cool nickname.
482
00:25:32,616 --> 00:25:35,285
The guy at the Narcotics task force
said Keywell was moving product
483
00:25:35,369 --> 00:25:37,538
by seaplane along the lakes
and looking to expand.
484
00:25:37,621 --> 00:25:41,750
- Guess who was standing in his way?
- Might it be Zahradnik, from Duluth?
485
00:25:43,502 --> 00:25:45,546
Keywell knew Zahradnik was trying
to expand into Canada,
486
00:25:45,629 --> 00:25:48,006
he floated a bogus partnership,
Zahradnik bit.
487
00:25:48,090 --> 00:25:50,968
Keywell's real plan was to lure
Zahradnik off of his home turf
488
00:25:51,051 --> 00:25:52,427
so he could take him out.
489
00:25:52,511 --> 00:25:54,388
That must be why Zahradnik
swallowed the map.
490
00:25:54,471 --> 00:25:56,348
He knew he was going to die,
so he left us a clue.
491
00:25:56,431 --> 00:25:57,683
Do you think Keywell's still in town?
492
00:25:57,766 --> 00:25:59,685
The question is where, and for how long?
493
00:25:59,768 --> 00:26:02,229
No, the question is where is Waabakwa?
494
00:26:02,312 --> 00:26:06,149
Because we sent him to ask questions
to a guy who is a psychopath.
495
00:26:06,233 --> 00:26:08,235
Hey, I remember that guy!
496
00:26:08,902 --> 00:26:10,153
He was at the marina.
497
00:26:10,237 --> 00:26:12,155
He said he loved me in Never Been Kissed.
498
00:26:13,031 --> 00:26:14,575
Good guy.
499
00:26:15,826 --> 00:26:19,037
He needs to tell us where Keywell is
before he leaves town and it's too late.
500
00:26:19,121 --> 00:26:21,957
I'm going to go see if there's any word
from Waabakwa before I go in there.
501
00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:24,626
Perfect timing.
502
00:26:24,710 --> 00:26:27,212
I am gonna go in there
and get that guy to talk.
503
00:26:27,296 --> 00:26:30,215
Wait. You can't go in there
as a consultant.
504
00:26:30,299 --> 00:26:34,720
I can do whatever gets results.
Plus, we are on a ticking clock.
505
00:26:34,803 --> 00:26:37,431
Hey! Let me go in. I can play Bad Cop.
506
00:26:37,514 --> 00:26:39,474
What makes you think
you can be the Bad Cop?
507
00:26:39,558 --> 00:26:42,186
You think you can be
a better Bad Cop than me, or something?
508
00:26:42,811 --> 00:26:45,689
It's not a competition. But...yeah.
509
00:26:45,772 --> 00:26:48,901
That's not what the producers
of Call Carter would say.
510
00:26:51,945 --> 00:26:52,946
What did you say?
511
00:26:53,030 --> 00:26:57,618
They always said your performance
was kinda soft.
512
00:27:04,917 --> 00:27:08,086
- I hear you have a heart condition.
- What?
513
00:27:08,754 --> 00:27:11,924
- No, man.
- Yeah, can't do the nitrates.
514
00:27:12,007 --> 00:27:14,468
All that bacon makes you keep
your mouth shut.
515
00:27:14,551 --> 00:27:16,678
I don't follow.
516
00:27:16,762 --> 00:27:18,805
Well, follow this!
517
00:27:18,889 --> 00:27:21,183
Either you talk,
or I crack you like an egg
518
00:27:21,266 --> 00:27:25,062
and fry you on the floor of a hot
yoga studio in the middle of July!
519
00:27:25,145 --> 00:27:26,939
Yeah, well, I'm gonna scramble up
that egg,
520
00:27:27,022 --> 00:27:29,816
I'm gonna put some ketchup on it
and I'm gonna eat it.
521
00:27:29,900 --> 00:27:31,944
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, love eggs.
522
00:27:32,027 --> 00:27:33,987
Tell me something.
How big are your nipples?
523
00:27:34,071 --> 00:27:38,200
- My nipples? Excuse you, man?
- Pepperoni size or salami?
524
00:27:38,283 --> 00:27:39,535
'Cause I'm gonna put clamps on them
525
00:27:39,618 --> 00:27:41,411
and I'm gonna connect 'em
to a car battery,
526
00:27:41,495 --> 00:27:42,996
and I'm gonna light you up!
527
00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:45,165
Okay, David, stop.
528
00:27:45,249 --> 00:27:46,542
You're just taking it too far, man.
529
00:27:46,625 --> 00:27:48,669
It works for Jack Bauer in every episode.
530
00:27:48,752 --> 00:27:51,797
Yeah, but that's 24,
we're more of a Castle vibe here.
531
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:55,092
Okay, less Bauer hard, more Fillion hard.
532
00:27:55,175 --> 00:27:57,427
What does Fillion hard look like?
533
00:28:01,765 --> 00:28:03,684
What the hell is going on in there?
534
00:28:03,767 --> 00:28:05,143
Oh, don't worry.
535
00:28:05,227 --> 00:28:08,480
We got the address right here!
536
00:28:11,817 --> 00:28:14,820
So, the mechanic confirmed
that Keywell killed Zahradnik
537
00:28:14,903 --> 00:28:16,530
before he dropped him in the lake.
538
00:28:16,613 --> 00:28:19,074
I hope this address he gave us
turns out to be something.
539
00:28:20,158 --> 00:28:21,785
Where are you, Waabakwa?
540
00:28:23,579 --> 00:28:26,748
- Stop touching me!
- Easy, I have to be able to see, okay?
541
00:28:26,832 --> 00:28:28,041
Will you tell him to stay on his side?
542
00:28:28,125 --> 00:28:30,043
He's not sharing, Sam.
He's not sharing his--
543
00:28:30,127 --> 00:28:33,463
One more word out of either of you
and I'm turning this car around!
544
00:28:36,008 --> 00:28:38,385
- Quit it!
- He hurt me!
545
00:28:38,468 --> 00:28:39,803
That was my funny bone.
546
00:28:40,679 --> 00:28:42,848
- Hey!
- Are you kidding me?
547
00:28:42,931 --> 00:28:47,269
- He's going to blow our cover!
- I hope he does.
548
00:28:47,352 --> 00:28:50,772
That way, I can call the studio
and tell them what a mistake they made--
549
00:28:54,067 --> 00:28:56,069
I know that you're going through
a difficult time right now,
550
00:28:56,153 --> 00:28:59,615
but I need you two to be on the same page
before you get us killed.
551
00:28:59,698 --> 00:29:02,409
Go apologize and make him believe it.
552
00:29:02,492 --> 00:29:03,994
Just get it done.
553
00:29:04,077 --> 00:29:07,372
You're an actor, right? Go act.
554
00:29:07,456 --> 00:29:08,874
But he'll know I'm faking.
555
00:29:08,957 --> 00:29:11,084
Listen, I'm only telling you this
556
00:29:11,168 --> 00:29:13,837
because I know that you can make him
believe you.
557
00:29:13,921 --> 00:29:16,798
You're an actor, right?
You're a better actor than that guy.
558
00:29:16,882 --> 00:29:18,258
All right, so go act.
559
00:29:25,015 --> 00:29:27,059
- You first, go.
- No, please...
560
00:29:27,142 --> 00:29:28,685
No, come on, go, please.
561
00:29:28,769 --> 00:29:31,021
- Okay.
- All right, let me go.
562
00:29:31,104 --> 00:29:32,189
Okay.
563
00:29:33,690 --> 00:29:36,401
- I'll go.
- Okay, just do it.
564
00:29:36,485 --> 00:29:41,532
You know once I played the complicated,
misunderstood Phoebe stalker on Friends?
565
00:29:41,615 --> 00:29:42,616
Oh, yeah.
566
00:29:42,699 --> 00:29:45,577
My career just went into the stratosphere.
567
00:29:45,661 --> 00:29:52,000
And then, I just needed the best,
the priciest denim, the silkiest sheets.
568
00:29:52,084 --> 00:29:54,127
I filled my pool with the wettest water.
569
00:29:54,211 --> 00:29:55,254
Wettest water?
570
00:29:55,337 --> 00:29:58,674
Oh, success, man. She changed me.
571
00:29:59,299 --> 00:30:02,594
And then, the comparisons started.
He's a young Steve Martin.
572
00:30:03,428 --> 00:30:04,763
Or Martin Short.
573
00:30:04,847 --> 00:30:10,811
They started grouping me together
with the likes of Peter Sellers.
574
00:30:10,894 --> 00:30:13,939
And then, it was Buster Keaton
and Charlie Chaplin.
575
00:30:14,022 --> 00:30:16,358
- I get it.
- The new Jerry Lewis.
576
00:30:16,441 --> 00:30:18,318
You know what happened? I got mad, man.
577
00:30:19,236 --> 00:30:22,489
I mean, I'm not a facsimile!
I'm David Arquette.
578
00:30:22,573 --> 00:30:28,245
Do you think they go up to, Bill Murray
and say, "You're an old David Arquette."
579
00:30:28,328 --> 00:30:29,830
- They should.
- No, man.
580
00:30:29,913 --> 00:30:32,833
I'm me. I'm unique.
581
00:30:32,916 --> 00:30:38,463
I'm a comedic actor,
and a certified Bob Ross instructor.
582
00:30:38,547 --> 00:30:41,175
Yeah, not a lot of people know that.
583
00:30:41,258 --> 00:30:47,264
Point is, I just, I don't want
to be so needy, but I am.
584
00:30:47,347 --> 00:30:49,266
You're not going to believe this, but...
585
00:30:50,684 --> 00:30:54,646
when I was a kid,
I was a little bit overweight.
586
00:30:54,730 --> 00:30:56,148
No, I believe it.
587
00:30:56,231 --> 00:30:57,482
I was bullied a lot, too.
588
00:30:57,566 --> 00:30:59,151
I can see that.
589
00:30:59,234 --> 00:31:02,029
I remember one day, the bullies, they--
590
00:31:02,112 --> 00:31:04,156
they surrounded me
and they were really taunting me.
591
00:31:04,239 --> 00:31:08,869
They were syelling, "Harley the Heifer!
592
00:31:08,952 --> 00:31:10,954
Harley the Heifer!
593
00:31:11,038 --> 00:31:15,459
- Harley the Heifer!" Can I finish?
- It is a good burn. Sorry.
594
00:31:16,418 --> 00:31:19,505
So, they picked me up
and they threw me in this trash can.
595
00:31:20,547 --> 00:31:24,301
And when I was in the darkness
of this can, that's when it hit me.
596
00:31:25,969 --> 00:31:29,598
So, I crawled out of it.
It took me a while because...
597
00:31:30,516 --> 00:31:31,517
'cause I was fat.
598
00:31:32,643 --> 00:31:34,686
And when I finally got out,
599
00:31:34,770 --> 00:31:38,857
I looked them all in the eye
and I thanked them.
600
00:31:39,608 --> 00:31:40,901
I was acting.
601
00:31:44,655 --> 00:31:48,700
But when I went home
and I sat on my bed...
602
00:31:52,746 --> 00:31:53,872
I cried.
603
00:31:56,166 --> 00:31:57,501
Because they were right.
604
00:31:58,794 --> 00:32:00,295
I belonged in that can.
605
00:32:02,756 --> 00:32:04,925
I was just a piece of trash.
606
00:32:16,061 --> 00:32:18,480
Wait, you're acting!
607
00:32:18,564 --> 00:32:20,899
No, it's so real!
608
00:32:20,983 --> 00:32:24,862
- It's so real. I can see it.
- No, I can tell you're faking.
609
00:32:28,156 --> 00:32:31,410
- I got you! I totally am.
- No, but it was riveting!
610
00:32:31,493 --> 00:32:32,578
Real tears.
611
00:32:32,661 --> 00:32:34,788
You have to tell me your technique?
612
00:32:34,872 --> 00:32:38,125
Well, usually I just think
of the People's Choice Awards
613
00:32:38,208 --> 00:32:41,378
when I lost out Best Breakout
Male to Rajesh
614
00:32:41,461 --> 00:32:43,922
- from Big Bang. That,
- Rajesh.
615
00:32:44,006 --> 00:32:46,758
or sometimes I just pull a nose hair,
that usually does the trick.
616
00:32:46,842 --> 00:32:49,094
Oh, yeah, right there.
617
00:32:49,178 --> 00:32:52,931
Have you ever tried to sit on your 'nads?
I heard that worked once for Tim Roth.
618
00:32:53,015 --> 00:32:57,019
Regardless, you are a wonderful actor.
619
00:32:57,102 --> 00:32:59,354
- I am just learning so much from you.
- Thank you.
620
00:32:59,438 --> 00:33:05,319
- As an actor, and also as a police actor.
- Thank you.
621
00:33:05,402 --> 00:33:06,612
Thank you.
622
00:33:08,447 --> 00:33:10,616
It's just him. He's alone.
Says he's a driver.
623
00:33:11,241 --> 00:33:14,036
That's the guy who hired me, Keywell.
He's not a stable person.
624
00:33:14,119 --> 00:33:16,914
- How about this guy?
- He was there, too.
625
00:33:16,997 --> 00:33:18,290
- He didn't look too happy.
- Where are they now?
626
00:33:18,373 --> 00:33:20,834
They took a seaplane
to a meeting up north, I think.
627
00:33:20,918 --> 00:33:23,295
Well, if they took a seaplane,
then where is Waabakwa's car?
628
00:33:23,378 --> 00:33:25,130
- Keywell asked me to get rid of it.
- Why'd he do that?
629
00:33:25,214 --> 00:33:28,175
Because the local guy isn't going to be
needing it anymore.
630
00:33:28,926 --> 00:33:30,719
It's not a meeting.
631
00:33:30,802 --> 00:33:31,970
It's a hit.
632
00:33:33,305 --> 00:33:34,431
Okay, here is what we know.
633
00:33:34,515 --> 00:33:36,433
The mechanic said that Waabakwa
was approached
634
00:33:36,517 --> 00:33:38,018
by both Zahradnik and Keywell.
635
00:33:38,101 --> 00:33:41,188
They said they were looking for a local
to provide air transport,
636
00:33:41,271 --> 00:33:42,981
maybe hook them up
with some warehouse space.
637
00:33:43,065 --> 00:33:45,067
Waab thought he was getting in
on the ground floor of something legit.
638
00:33:45,150 --> 00:33:49,071
But he's not stupid. So, by now,
he's wondering where Zahradnik is.
639
00:33:49,154 --> 00:33:52,449
And recognized Keywell's cologne
as eau de raving psychopath.
640
00:33:52,533 --> 00:33:56,411
None of this tells us where he took him,
or if he's even still alive.
641
00:33:56,495 --> 00:34:00,165
I've left him like eight messages.
Guys, this is on us.
642
00:34:04,753 --> 00:34:07,339
Oh that's weird.
It's from an unknown number.
643
00:34:07,422 --> 00:34:09,758
It just says "Ghost",
and then a bunch of random letters,
644
00:34:09,842 --> 00:34:11,260
like fingers slipping on a keyboard.
645
00:34:11,343 --> 00:34:12,761
Well, you think it's Waab?
646
00:34:12,845 --> 00:34:14,304
The driver said they were
heading north, right?
647
00:34:14,388 --> 00:34:16,390
- Yeah.
- I think I know where.
648
00:34:16,473 --> 00:34:19,768
Each time it comes around,
I don't get to get to say something.
649
00:34:21,311 --> 00:34:22,896
Here we go, Redstone Harbour.
650
00:34:22,980 --> 00:34:25,816
It's a ghost town except
for one structure, an old fishing cabin.
651
00:34:25,899 --> 00:34:28,694
Koji took me there when I was a kid.
There was graffiti. First Nations.
652
00:34:28,777 --> 00:34:29,945
Anishinaabe.
653
00:34:30,028 --> 00:34:32,406
Waab might have suggested it
for Keywell's import business.
654
00:34:32,489 --> 00:34:34,533
Remember, they don't call Keywell
"The Blade" for nothing.
655
00:34:34,616 --> 00:34:36,410
And we can't assume
he doesn't have back-up.
656
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:41,582
Okay, you two follow me.
Arquette, you stay in the car.
657
00:34:41,665 --> 00:34:42,875
Come on!
658
00:34:47,045 --> 00:34:48,213
Put this on.
659
00:34:49,298 --> 00:34:50,424
This is so exciting.
660
00:34:50,507 --> 00:34:53,468
- I told you to stay in the car.
- You need me in there.
661
00:34:53,552 --> 00:34:56,680
- I've been in tons of fights.
- On film or in real life?
662
00:34:56,763 --> 00:34:58,182
- Film, mostly.
- Yeah.
663
00:34:58,265 --> 00:35:02,269
But every stunt coordinator I've ever
worked with said my form is flawless.
664
00:35:02,352 --> 00:35:04,688
You know, I once had this fight scene
with Jon Cryer.
665
00:35:04,771 --> 00:35:06,690
He punched me right in the nose,
knocked me out!
666
00:35:06,773 --> 00:35:09,693
He wasn't even supposed to hit me.
We were playing dentists.
667
00:35:09,776 --> 00:35:12,321
Jon Cryer who was Duckie
in Pretty in Pink?
668
00:35:12,404 --> 00:35:16,241
Yeah, I think he was just mad at me
'cause I was friends with Charlie
669
00:35:16,325 --> 00:35:17,826
during the whole "tiger blood" thing.
670
00:35:17,910 --> 00:35:20,704
- He never even apologized.
- Okay, put this on.
671
00:35:20,787 --> 00:35:22,748
- Thank you!
- Yeah.
672
00:35:23,832 --> 00:35:25,542
- Come with me. Come on.
- I'm so excited.
673
00:35:25,626 --> 00:35:28,003
Stay low. I know, so exciting, right?
674
00:35:28,086 --> 00:35:31,131
- Yeah. Okay, what's my move?
- Okay, you ready for your move?
675
00:35:31,215 --> 00:35:36,053
Your move is to get in this car
and stay there or I will shoot you myself.
676
00:35:39,515 --> 00:35:40,807
Get in the car!
677
00:35:46,939 --> 00:35:50,025
I understand you had a visit
from Johnny Law the other day?
678
00:35:50,734 --> 00:35:52,027
Very bad.
679
00:35:54,571 --> 00:35:59,117
Is that who you were trying to text
on your little phoney-phone phone?
680
00:36:04,831 --> 00:36:05,958
Don't move.
681
00:36:23,976 --> 00:36:25,143
Okay!
682
00:36:26,979 --> 00:36:28,146
All right!
683
00:36:32,276 --> 00:36:34,027
- How many goons?
- Two.
684
00:36:34,695 --> 00:36:36,363
- Hey, I didn't know.
- I know. We know.
685
00:36:36,446 --> 00:36:37,948
We got your back.
686
00:36:54,298 --> 00:36:55,382
Where are you?
687
00:36:56,425 --> 00:37:00,596
I'm gonna find you,
and I'm gonna cook you like a moose!
688
00:37:14,276 --> 00:37:15,861
Oh, God, I'm so, so sorry.
689
00:37:17,279 --> 00:37:18,530
Oh, I hope that's not permanent.
690
00:37:22,659 --> 00:37:24,828
That's what you get for whistling
at a woman.
691
00:37:24,912 --> 00:37:27,247
Still the best defender in the province,
Sunshine.
692
00:37:27,331 --> 00:37:28,790
Tie up that goon.
693
00:37:39,843 --> 00:37:41,094
Oh, Harley!
694
00:37:41,178 --> 00:37:43,764
- I was looking for Keywell.
- Me too.
695
00:37:45,182 --> 00:37:47,100
What was that? Was that an animal?
696
00:37:47,184 --> 00:37:49,102
No, that's the cry of an Arquette.
697
00:37:49,895 --> 00:37:51,605
Come on, move!
698
00:37:51,688 --> 00:37:53,232
Get up! Get on the plane.
699
00:37:53,315 --> 00:37:55,442
- Hey, you stay back!
- Stay where you are.
700
00:37:55,526 --> 00:37:58,070
- Drop the knife!
- No!
701
00:37:58,153 --> 00:37:59,863
He'll never kill Courteney Cox's
ex-husband.
702
00:37:59,947 --> 00:38:01,823
I'm gonna kill Courteney Cox's ex!
703
00:38:02,491 --> 00:38:04,034
I was really off on that one.
704
00:38:04,117 --> 00:38:07,162
How would you like it if I brought up
your ex-wife in the conversation?
705
00:38:07,246 --> 00:38:08,622
I don't know. I've never been married.
706
00:38:08,705 --> 00:38:10,123
Oh, big surprise.
707
00:38:10,207 --> 00:38:11,667
- Hey, zip it!
- Not the face.
708
00:38:12,334 --> 00:38:14,962
Just keep moving, come on!
709
00:38:15,838 --> 00:38:17,756
What is it, Vijay? Kind of in the middle
of something here.
710
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:18,841
Hey, Harley.
711
00:38:18,924 --> 00:38:21,343
- How do you think this ends, Keywell?
- I don't know.
712
00:38:21,426 --> 00:38:22,970
I'm just living in the moment.
713
00:38:23,053 --> 00:38:25,097
I'm back in Bishop tomorrow
to pick up Arquette.
714
00:38:25,180 --> 00:38:27,558
And listen, I feel bad.
I should have warned you.
715
00:38:27,641 --> 00:38:30,435
- He's a bit...goofy.
- Keep moving!
716
00:38:31,186 --> 00:38:34,314
He's not goofy, he's just misunderstood.
717
00:38:35,649 --> 00:38:36,900
He's an actor.
718
00:38:39,278 --> 00:38:41,822
- You gotta shoot him, Sam.
- I don't have a clear shot.
719
00:38:41,905 --> 00:38:43,323
Keep going. Come on.
720
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:46,994
Come on, get in. Go! Come on, move over!
721
00:38:48,453 --> 00:38:50,080
Jon Cryer...
722
00:38:50,163 --> 00:38:53,166
Jon Cryer!
723
00:38:53,250 --> 00:38:54,751
Duckie?
724
00:39:09,349 --> 00:39:11,643
Carter, I pulled something.
725
00:39:11,727 --> 00:39:13,020
Old wrestling injury.
726
00:39:13,103 --> 00:39:14,605
Hey, tell me,
727
00:39:14,688 --> 00:39:17,024
- all that wrestling's fake, isn't it?
- Do you want me to show you
728
00:39:17,107 --> 00:39:19,067
- how fake it is?
- No. I'm sorry.
729
00:39:19,151 --> 00:39:21,278
- Is that fake?
- No.
730
00:39:21,361 --> 00:39:24,031
Oh, God!
731
00:39:25,115 --> 00:39:28,368
This is so embarrassing.
I can't even get up.
732
00:39:28,994 --> 00:39:30,537
Where's your double when you need one?
733
00:39:30,621 --> 00:39:35,375
Hey, you had your hero moment,
and now it's my turn.
734
00:39:39,922 --> 00:39:41,590
Some things never change.
735
00:39:41,673 --> 00:39:43,509
I got the power…
736
00:39:49,806 --> 00:39:51,517
Here comes your knight in shining armour.
737
00:39:52,434 --> 00:39:54,686
Wait, what? Wait, my knight?
738
00:39:54,770 --> 00:39:57,481
What, you think this manly display
of manliness is for me?
739
00:39:59,358 --> 00:40:00,984
I got the power…
740
00:40:02,444 --> 00:40:04,238
Hey, look who's still alive.
741
00:40:11,286 --> 00:40:12,704
Little help!
742
00:40:12,788 --> 00:40:15,541
Ah, okay, we got this, yeah.
743
00:40:22,214 --> 00:40:24,842
- What are you doing?
- Leaving, before you ask.
744
00:40:24,925 --> 00:40:28,011
I want you to miss me, Sam.
I don't want you to be glad I'm gone.
745
00:40:28,095 --> 00:40:30,931
So, I'm just here for a visit
but I'm gonna get a motel.
746
00:40:31,014 --> 00:40:32,266
I wasn't going to ask you to leave.
747
00:40:32,349 --> 00:40:35,561
Yeah, that's the problem.
You never ask, but I can always tell.
748
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:40,941
Okay, look, Simone, if you want to go,
I'm not gonna stop you.
749
00:40:41,024 --> 00:40:44,570
- But, I think you should stay.
- But not really, though, right?
750
00:40:44,653 --> 00:40:48,657
I want you to stay. Please.
751
00:40:51,076 --> 00:40:54,079
- Thank you, Sam. No.
- It's okay.
752
00:40:54,162 --> 00:40:57,124
All the good in my life is cause of you.
753
00:40:57,207 --> 00:40:58,667
Have I ever said that before?
754
00:41:00,085 --> 00:41:03,422
No. It's about damn time, though.
755
00:41:08,427 --> 00:41:11,471
- Now, can I give you some advice?
- Oh, yes.
756
00:41:11,555 --> 00:41:13,182
It's time to start putting yourself first.
757
00:41:14,349 --> 00:41:16,852
I see big things for you, Sam.
Bigger than Bishop.
758
00:41:16,935 --> 00:41:19,396
- So, now I should leave Bishop?
- What's keeping you here?
759
00:41:21,023 --> 00:41:25,819
I could have died out there, Harley.
And in a way, the old David Arquette did.
760
00:41:25,903 --> 00:41:28,197
- You changed my life.
- It's what I do.
761
00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:30,449
Besides, if you were dead,
I wouldn't be able to catch you
762
00:41:30,532 --> 00:41:32,784
every Wednesday night, on Call Carter.
763
00:41:32,868 --> 00:41:35,454
Yeah, about that.
I'm not gonna do the show.
764
00:41:35,537 --> 00:41:37,206
What? Why?
765
00:41:38,123 --> 00:41:41,126
You know, I was really just doing it
for the money.
766
00:41:41,210 --> 00:41:44,630
And I'm already obscenely wealthy,
in case you didn't know.
767
00:41:44,713 --> 00:41:49,009
I've done not one, but two Muppet movies.
768
00:41:49,092 --> 00:41:51,303
That's, uh, two more than Justin Long.
769
00:41:51,386 --> 00:41:56,141
Besides, what I really want to do
is direct...porn.
770
00:41:57,142 --> 00:41:58,519
Classy porn.
771
00:41:58,602 --> 00:42:00,687
Hey! My two superstars!
772
00:42:02,105 --> 00:42:04,399
We gotta go!
But Harley, I owe you big time!
773
00:42:04,483 --> 00:42:07,903
Just don't tell Vijay
until you get back to L.A.
774
00:42:07,986 --> 00:42:10,656
Don't ever tell me what to do!
775
00:42:12,032 --> 00:42:13,909
I'm kidding!
776
00:42:14,701 --> 00:42:16,370
- That scared me.
- Gotcha!
777
00:42:20,082 --> 00:42:21,458
See you, David Arquette.
778
00:42:25,337 --> 00:42:27,214
- You ready to roll?
- Always.
779
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:34,346
- Come on. Oh, yeah.
- All right. Here we go.
780
00:42:34,429 --> 00:42:35,722
Oh, yeah!
781
00:42:36,765 --> 00:42:39,768
- Okay, not bad.
- Getting good at this.
782
00:42:39,852 --> 00:42:42,104
Hey, wait a minute. Damn you, Val Kilmer.
783
00:42:42,646 --> 00:42:45,190
- Shouldn't one of us be behind the wheel?
- Yeah, let's get up there right now.
784
00:42:45,274 --> 00:42:46,859
Okay, let's go!
785
00:42:46,942 --> 00:42:50,404
Na, na na na, na na
786
00:42:51,905 --> 00:42:55,033
Na, na na na, na na
787
00:43:17,264 --> 00:43:19,683
Na, na na na, na na
788
00:43:22,227 --> 00:43:24,980
Na, na na na, na na
789
00:43:27,399 --> 00:43:30,152
Na, na na na, na na
790
00:43:36,909 --> 00:43:39,870
Open wide, say "ahh".