1
00:01:40,972 --> 00:01:45,972
Subtitles by explosiveskull
Resynced for by Cullyn

2
00:01:48,089 --> 00:01:49,923
<i>Hi, moms, Stephanie here.</i>

3
00:01:49,925 --> 00:01:52,391
<i>Today, as promised,
I'm gonna share</i>

4
00:01:52,393 --> 00:01:55,661
<i>my zucchini chocolate chip
cookie recipe.</i>

5
00:01:55,663 --> 00:01:57,563
<i>But first, many of you
have asked me</i>

6
00:01:57,565 --> 00:01:59,932
<i>for an update
on the Emily situation.</i>

7
00:01:59,934 --> 00:02:02,569
<i>And for those of you
who are new to my vlog,</i>

8
00:02:02,571 --> 00:02:06,339
<i>you should know my best friend,
Emily, is missing right now.</i>

9
00:02:06,341 --> 00:02:08,508
<i>She asked me a simple favor,</i>

10
00:02:08,510 --> 00:02:10,811
<i>to pick up her son, Nicky,
from school,</i>

11
00:02:10,813 --> 00:02:13,613
which was five days ago.

12
00:02:13,615 --> 00:02:15,451
And she hasn't
come back yet, so...

13
00:02:22,491 --> 00:02:24,390
I'm sorry,
we're all really worried,

14
00:02:24,392 --> 00:02:29,529
and I'm doing everything I can to
help the police track her down.

15
00:02:29,531 --> 00:02:32,632
But I'm realizing I don't
know her as well as I thought I did.

16
00:02:32,634 --> 00:02:34,434
It's like my mom
used to say,

17
00:02:34,436 --> 00:02:36,103
God rest her soul. Um...

18
00:02:36,105 --> 00:02:38,138
Secrets are like margarine,

19
00:02:38,140 --> 00:02:40,841
easy to spread, bad for the heart.

20
00:02:40,843 --> 00:02:42,609
But as different as we are,

21
00:02:42,611 --> 00:02:44,644
I do consider Emily
my best friend.

22
00:02:44,646 --> 00:02:47,680
She is this wonderful,
elegant person.

23
00:02:47,682 --> 00:02:50,150
And our sons brought us
together, actually.

24
00:02:50,152 --> 00:02:52,485
<i>Well, for our new friends,</i>

25
00:02:52,487 --> 00:02:54,086
<i>I'll just start
from the beginning.</i>

26
00:02:54,088 --> 00:02:56,889
<i>I met Emily a few weeks ago</i>

27
00:02:56,891 --> 00:02:57,890
<i>at school.</i>

28
00:02:57,892 --> 00:02:59,793
<i>It was
International Cuisine Day</i>

29
00:02:59,795 --> 00:03:01,627
<i>in my son's
first grade class.</i>

30
00:03:01,629 --> 00:03:03,530
<i>And once again,
I drew Sweden,</i>

31
00:03:03,532 --> 00:03:05,931
<i>which meant my famous
meatless meatballs.</i>

32
00:03:05,933 --> 00:03:07,533
You're all dead!

33
00:03:07,535 --> 00:03:09,468
I killed everyone!

34
00:03:09,470 --> 00:03:11,638
Not me.
I came back to life.

35
00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:13,539
I want to thank everyone,

36
00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:17,144
who participated
in today's feast. Yay!

37
00:03:17,146 --> 00:03:18,878
Class, haven't we
learned so much

38
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,646
about food
from all around the world?

39
00:03:20,648 --> 00:03:21,882
Yes!

40
00:03:21,884 --> 00:03:23,949
Give your parents
a big round of applause.

41
00:03:23,951 --> 00:03:25,585
That looks great!

42
00:03:25,587 --> 00:03:27,020
- Big smile!
- Oh, my gosh.

43
00:03:27,022 --> 00:03:29,055
Where does she get
all that energy from?

44
00:03:29,057 --> 00:03:30,055
What are you looking at?

45
00:03:30,057 --> 00:03:32,125
I think there's crystal
meth in those meatballs.

46
00:03:32,127 --> 00:03:34,460
Oh, parents, there's
a sign-up sheet on the board

47
00:03:34,462 --> 00:03:36,863
for our Fun Fair next week.

48
00:03:36,865 --> 00:03:39,065
Uh, please, Stephanie,
don't sign up

49
00:03:39,067 --> 00:03:40,766
for more than one job.

50
00:03:40,768 --> 00:03:43,736
I'm not sure everyone else
has had a chance to volunteer.

51
00:03:46,607 --> 00:03:48,641
Miles, sweetie, sweetie,
maybe just be careful

52
00:03:48,643 --> 00:03:50,676
with your fingers
with Nicky's truck, okay?

53
00:03:50,678 --> 00:03:52,446
Has Nicky's mom
volunteered?

54
00:03:52,448 --> 00:03:54,047
Emily? Please.
She wouldn't know

55
00:03:54,049 --> 00:03:55,615
a sign-up sheet
if it bit her on the ass.

56
00:03:55,617 --> 00:03:58,452
God, it'd be my dream
to run PR for Dennis Nylon.

57
00:03:58,454 --> 00:04:00,152
Can you imagine all
the free shit she must get?

58
00:04:00,154 --> 00:04:01,020
- I know.
- Okay,

59
00:04:01,022 --> 00:04:02,688
I'm crossing myself
off decorations.

60
00:04:02,690 --> 00:04:04,156
I can leave that
open for Emily.

61
00:04:04,158 --> 00:04:05,192
And then if she
can't make it,

62
00:04:05,194 --> 00:04:07,060
I can still bring my
balloons and helium tank.

63
00:04:07,062 --> 00:04:08,527
Please tell me
you don't actually

64
00:04:08,529 --> 00:04:10,496
own a helium tank,
Stephanie.

65
00:04:10,498 --> 00:04:12,865
I think lots of people
own helium tanks, Stacy.

66
00:04:12,867 --> 00:04:14,533
Because kids love balloons.

67
00:04:14,535 --> 00:04:15,936
Do you not have one?

68
00:04:15,938 --> 00:04:18,804
You a bad parent?
I'm kidding.

69
00:04:18,806 --> 00:04:20,239
We're terrible parents.

70
00:04:20,241 --> 00:04:23,042
I think it's a perfect
plan, Stephanie.

71
00:04:23,044 --> 00:04:25,811
Good thinking, Stephanie.

72
00:04:27,683 --> 00:04:29,114
Hey, Smooch!

73
00:04:29,116 --> 00:04:31,684
Oh, great work
today, Smooch.

74
00:04:31,686 --> 00:04:32,751
Smooch!

75
00:04:32,753 --> 00:04:34,520
- Thanks a lot, Mom.
- Oh.

76
00:04:34,522 --> 00:04:36,556
Can me and Miles
have a play date today?

77
00:04:36,558 --> 00:04:38,525
Um, I don't know, sweetie.

78
00:04:38,527 --> 00:04:39,792
I think we need
to ask your mommy,

79
00:04:39,794 --> 00:04:41,660
and she's still
in the city.

80
00:04:41,662 --> 00:04:42,895
She's right there.

81
00:05:06,755 --> 00:05:08,821
Come here, little dude.

82
00:05:08,823 --> 00:05:11,056
Oh, my baby!

83
00:05:11,058 --> 00:05:13,994
Look at your shirt. Did any
food make it into your mouth?

84
00:05:13,996 --> 00:05:15,962
Ask her, Nicky, ask her!

85
00:05:15,964 --> 00:05:17,063
Ask me what?

86
00:05:17,065 --> 00:05:18,030
We want a play date.

87
00:05:18,032 --> 00:05:20,299
Oh, we can't. Mommy
already has a play date

88
00:05:20,301 --> 00:05:22,835
with a symphony of
anti-depressants. Let's go.

89
00:05:22,837 --> 00:05:24,938
Play date!
Play date! Play date!

90
00:05:24,940 --> 00:05:27,107
Baby, please don't do this.
I gotta go.

91
00:05:27,109 --> 00:05:28,542
Come on. I got
a ton of work to do.

92
00:05:28,544 --> 00:05:30,010
You don't let me
have any fun.

93
00:05:30,012 --> 00:05:32,878
That's not true.
I let you tear my labia

94
00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:34,851
as you exited my body,
so you're welcome.

95
00:05:38,085 --> 00:05:39,686
Do you drink?

96
00:05:39,688 --> 00:05:42,821
- I need a martini.
- Oh! Uh...

97
00:05:42,823 --> 00:05:45,926
Yeah. I like martinis. I haven't
had one in a long time.

98
00:05:45,928 --> 00:05:48,727
They're good, though. Had one
that was mostly chocolate.

99
00:05:48,729 --> 00:05:50,931
And I was like, "Alcohol
and chocolate!"

100
00:05:50,933 --> 00:05:51,998
Mom life.

101
00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:55,135
Oh, okay. No play date.
Come on, kid, let's go.

102
00:05:55,137 --> 00:05:56,835
Then I'm staying here.

103
00:05:56,837 --> 00:05:59,205
Christ, he's
fucking stubborn.

104
00:05:59,207 --> 00:06:01,575
It doesn't have to have
the chocolate in it.

105
00:06:01,577 --> 00:06:05,311
Okay, I don't think I'm
gonna win this, so, um...

106
00:06:05,313 --> 00:06:08,782
I mean, do you wanna come over
for a beverage of any kind?

107
00:06:08,784 --> 00:06:10,282
I think I could use
some backup.

108
00:06:10,284 --> 00:06:11,917
That's me? I'm backup?

109
00:06:11,919 --> 00:06:13,587
Does your kid drink, maybe?

110
00:06:13,589 --> 00:06:15,621
I mean, it's never too
early to start teaching them.

111
00:06:15,623 --> 00:06:17,756
I think you're joking,
but great.

112
00:06:17,758 --> 00:06:19,224
- Sweetie...
- Hey, you, let's go.

113
00:06:19,226 --> 00:06:20,160
Let's get your
umbrella out, okay?

114
00:06:20,162 --> 00:06:23,229
Because we're gonna
go out in the rain.

115
00:06:23,231 --> 00:06:25,664
What on Earth are
those two gonna talk about?

116
00:06:25,666 --> 00:06:29,035
Emily's gonna eat
poor Stephanie alive.

117
00:06:29,037 --> 00:06:31,071
At least she'd be
eating something.

118
00:06:31,073 --> 00:06:33,808
What is your problem?

119
00:06:41,816 --> 00:06:43,984
Go show him
your room. Go.

120
00:06:43,986 --> 00:06:45,652
Oh, please don't run!

121
00:06:45,654 --> 00:06:47,623
Be safe please!

122
00:06:49,858 --> 00:06:51,191
Cute socks.

123
00:06:51,193 --> 00:06:52,958
Oh, thanks!

124
00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:54,861
They're from Target.
It's 10 bucks a pack.

125
00:06:54,863 --> 00:06:56,328
- So great, Target.
- Yeah.

126
00:06:56,330 --> 00:06:57,429
They have other animals.

127
00:06:57,431 --> 00:07:00,335
They have these squirrel ones
are cute, chipmunks,

128
00:07:01,236 --> 00:07:02,271
beavers...

129
00:07:02,938 --> 00:07:06,106
That's so lifelike.

130
00:07:06,108 --> 00:07:07,306
Yeah.

131
00:07:07,308 --> 00:07:08,874
Do you like it?

132
00:07:08,876 --> 00:07:11,112
How could you not?
It's, um...

133
00:07:11,412 --> 00:07:13,046
Right?

134
00:07:13,048 --> 00:07:15,280
I used to dye my hair.
I get bored easily.

135
00:07:15,282 --> 00:07:17,017
Yeah.

136
00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:18,852
Did you paint that?

137
00:07:18,854 --> 00:07:21,787
No. No, no. It's made
by an almost famous painter

138
00:07:21,789 --> 00:07:22,789
from the East Village.

139
00:07:22,791 --> 00:07:24,958
My life is littered
with almost-somebodies.

140
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:26,859
I did some art modeling
in school

141
00:07:26,861 --> 00:07:28,427
to pay my way through.

142
00:07:28,429 --> 00:07:30,830
Then the pervert
got obsessed with me.

143
00:07:30,832 --> 00:07:32,232
Oh, well,
that happens, yeah.

144
00:07:32,234 --> 00:07:33,667
So I stole the painting,
you know,

145
00:07:33,669 --> 00:07:35,068
thinking it'd be worth
something someday.

146
00:07:35,070 --> 00:07:37,873
But, no.
No such luck.

147
00:07:39,940 --> 00:07:41,907
This house is incredible.

148
00:07:41,909 --> 00:07:43,275
Thanks. It's
a fucking money pit.

149
00:07:43,277 --> 00:07:46,246
- Oopsy.
- Hmm?

150
00:07:46,248 --> 00:07:50,083
Oh, sorry. It's, um, what we say
at my house when someone swears.

151
00:07:50,085 --> 00:07:51,316
It's a force of habit.

152
00:07:51,318 --> 00:07:54,354
We have an oopsy jar
in the pantry.

153
00:07:54,356 --> 00:07:55,688
It's like, you know.

154
00:07:55,690 --> 00:07:58,323
Put a quarter in
for every bad word.

155
00:07:58,325 --> 00:08:00,160
You should smash
the oopsy jar.

156
00:08:00,162 --> 00:08:01,260
That might change your life.

157
00:08:01,262 --> 00:08:03,162
Yeah. Ugh. Sorry.

158
00:08:03,164 --> 00:08:04,330
Don't say sorry.

159
00:08:04,332 --> 00:08:06,332
You don't need to do that.
You don't need to apologize.

160
00:08:06,334 --> 00:08:07,866
It's a fucked-up
female habit.

161
00:08:07,868 --> 00:08:09,869
You don't need to be sorry
for anything, ever.

162
00:08:09,871 --> 00:08:12,037
That's true.
That's great advice.

163
00:08:12,039 --> 00:08:13,308
Thank you.

164
00:08:14,810 --> 00:08:16,342
I love this music,
by the way.

165
00:08:16,344 --> 00:08:17,910
Thanks. Yeah.

166
00:08:17,912 --> 00:08:20,013
Makes me forget
I'm stuck in this shithole.

167
00:08:20,015 --> 00:08:21,414
I'm gonna go get booze.

168
00:08:21,416 --> 00:08:22,752
Great!

169
00:08:49,443 --> 00:08:52,048
I was really caught up
in the ambiance.

170
00:08:54,182 --> 00:08:56,018
Come on,
give me a little more.

171
00:08:56,952 --> 00:08:59,284
Oh!

172
00:08:59,286 --> 00:09:01,521
I liked it.
I may join you later.

173
00:09:01,523 --> 00:09:04,290
Oh! You must love cooking
in this kitchen!

174
00:09:04,292 --> 00:09:07,259
No, not really.
Sean does.

175
00:09:07,261 --> 00:09:10,263
I think it's probably just
an excuse to avoid writing.

176
00:09:10,265 --> 00:09:11,864
Your husband's a writer?

177
00:09:11,866 --> 00:09:13,899
No. He wrote a book
10 years ago.

178
00:09:13,901 --> 00:09:15,234
It made him the toast
of the town.

179
00:09:15,236 --> 00:09:16,436
I actually had to stalk him

180
00:09:16,438 --> 00:09:17,604
to make him
fall in love with me.

181
00:09:17,606 --> 00:09:21,040
But then, nothing. He never
wrote anything ever again.

182
00:09:21,042 --> 00:09:23,542
- It's the old bait-and-switch.
- What was the book?

183
00:09:23,544 --> 00:09:25,845
It's called
<i>Darkness at Dawn.</i>

184
00:09:25,847 --> 00:09:28,214
Oh, my gosh! I read
that in my book club!

185
00:09:28,216 --> 00:09:29,516
- Really?
- This was... Yeah.

186
00:09:29,518 --> 00:09:31,383
Well, this was back when
I first became a single mom,

187
00:09:31,385 --> 00:09:33,853
and I joined this book club, and
that was the first book we read.

188
00:09:33,855 --> 00:09:35,788
It's so impressive.

189
00:09:35,790 --> 00:09:36,825
So you're divorced, then?

190
00:09:38,058 --> 00:09:39,094
Widowed.

191
00:09:41,797 --> 00:09:43,299
Do you mind if I ask
how he died?

192
00:09:52,439 --> 00:09:54,574
Car accident.

193
00:09:54,576 --> 00:09:57,442
- Oh. How awful.
- Yeah.

194
00:09:57,444 --> 00:10:00,046
My brother, Chris, was in
the passenger seat, so...

195
00:10:00,048 --> 00:10:01,880
You're kidding.

196
00:10:01,882 --> 00:10:03,115
One fell swoop, and the two

197
00:10:03,117 --> 00:10:05,185
most important men
in my life were gone.

198
00:10:05,187 --> 00:10:07,186
Normally, sad stories
don't get to me.

199
00:10:07,188 --> 00:10:08,321
But that one...

200
00:10:08,323 --> 00:10:09,855
That one did.
That was brutal.

201
00:10:09,857 --> 00:10:11,557
I don't talk
about it a lot.

202
00:10:11,559 --> 00:10:12,892
Especially with people
I just met.

203
00:10:12,894 --> 00:10:15,261
I'm really sorry.
Oh! Mmm...

204
00:10:15,263 --> 00:10:16,528
Baby, if you
apologize again,

205
00:10:16,530 --> 00:10:18,163
I'm gonna have to slap
the sorry out of you.

206
00:10:18,165 --> 00:10:20,099
Yeah. That's...
I'm not sorry.

207
00:10:20,101 --> 00:10:21,868
That's a hard habit
to break, though.

208
00:10:21,870 --> 00:10:23,302
It is.

209
00:10:23,304 --> 00:10:25,271
So, are you
dating anyone?

210
00:10:25,273 --> 00:10:27,574
No. Slim pickings
in Warfield.

211
00:10:27,576 --> 00:10:30,844
Well, you are an hour
and a half outside the city.

212
00:10:30,846 --> 00:10:34,113
I'm not gonna date someone from the city.

213
00:10:34,115 --> 00:10:36,014
I tried eHarmony
for a while,

214
00:10:36,016 --> 00:10:37,282
and then that mother
of three wound up

215
00:10:37,284 --> 00:10:38,484
with her head
in the trash can,

216
00:10:38,486 --> 00:10:40,286
you remember that?
And I... Ugh.

217
00:10:40,288 --> 00:10:42,254
I said, "No thank you.
Delete."

218
00:10:42,256 --> 00:10:43,956
What?

219
00:10:43,958 --> 00:10:45,090
Come on, baby,

220
00:10:45,092 --> 00:10:48,061
you're too sexy to give up.

221
00:10:48,063 --> 00:10:50,162
That's nice.
I don't know. Um...

222
00:10:50,164 --> 00:10:52,098
If your head's gonna
end up in a trash can,

223
00:10:52,100 --> 00:10:53,966
your head's gonna end up
in a trash can.

224
00:10:53,968 --> 00:10:56,536
I just didn't think I would
end up a single mom,

225
00:10:56,538 --> 00:10:58,303
struggling to make
ends meet.

226
00:10:58,305 --> 00:11:00,038
I mean, my husband
had life insurance,

227
00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:01,574
thank goodness,
but not a lot.

228
00:11:01,576 --> 00:11:03,209
I put half of that away
for Miles' college,

229
00:11:03,211 --> 00:11:06,178
and so, with
that coming in,

230
00:11:06,180 --> 00:11:08,947
the money still
runs out in 2020.

231
00:11:08,949 --> 00:11:10,450
Thank God
for his life insurance.

232
00:11:10,452 --> 00:11:11,517
Yeah.

233
00:11:11,519 --> 00:11:12,551
My husband
doesn't have anything

234
00:11:12,553 --> 00:11:14,653
if it makes you feel better.
But he does spend like

235
00:11:14,655 --> 00:11:16,355
he's the man of the hour.

236
00:11:16,357 --> 00:11:18,258
Fucking have to pay
for everything.

237
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:20,192
We can't even
sell this house.

238
00:11:20,194 --> 00:11:21,894
We bought it
during the bubble.

239
00:11:21,896 --> 00:11:23,562
I love your house.

240
00:11:23,564 --> 00:11:25,565
Don't dream of selling it.

241
00:11:25,567 --> 00:11:29,839
If I were you, I'd just bask
in this kitchen all day long!

242
00:11:31,072 --> 00:11:34,007
Then you should move in.

243
00:11:34,009 --> 00:11:35,675
Here. Cheers
to being house poor.

244
00:11:35,677 --> 00:11:37,279
Yes, cheers!

245
00:11:40,314 --> 00:11:41,316
Mmm. What?

246
00:11:42,150 --> 00:11:43,483
That's, uh...

247
00:11:43,485 --> 00:11:45,218
It's just another one
of my bad decisions.

248
00:11:45,220 --> 00:11:47,353
Yeah.
It's great.

249
00:11:47,355 --> 00:11:48,588
Is that a charity symbol?

250
00:11:48,590 --> 00:11:51,925
Yeah, Mother Teresa and I are,
like, the same person, so...

251
00:11:51,927 --> 00:11:54,259
It's a nice contrast
with your ring.

252
00:11:54,261 --> 00:11:56,595
Thanks. Yeah, this is
a family heirloom.

253
00:11:56,597 --> 00:11:58,196
It belonged to Sean's
great-grandmom,

254
00:11:58,198 --> 00:11:59,197
and then his mom,

255
00:11:59,199 --> 00:12:01,167
and she insisted that I
have it, so, you know?

256
00:12:01,169 --> 00:12:02,936
Whose Subaru
is blocking the garage?

257
00:12:02,938 --> 00:12:05,939
- Speak of the devil.
- Oh, that's mine. I'm sorry...

258
00:12:05,941 --> 00:12:07,974
- You're what?
- Mmm...

259
00:12:07,976 --> 00:12:09,676
Your wife is trying to get me
to stop apologizing.

260
00:12:09,678 --> 00:12:13,146
Or maybe you can
get her to start.

261
00:12:13,148 --> 00:12:15,315
- Oh! Hi.
- Hi.

262
00:12:15,317 --> 00:12:16,548
- Hi.
- Hi.

263
00:12:16,550 --> 00:12:18,417
Oh, martini time?

264
00:12:18,419 --> 00:12:20,253
I'm sure
it's 5:00 somewhere.

265
00:12:20,255 --> 00:12:21,387
Oh, my God,
did you just come up

266
00:12:21,389 --> 00:12:22,555
with that cliche
by yourself?

267
00:12:22,557 --> 00:12:24,056
He's such
a brilliant writer.

268
00:12:24,058 --> 00:12:26,292
I have to say,
you inspire me.

269
00:12:26,294 --> 00:12:27,726
Not enough, apparently.

270
00:12:27,728 --> 00:12:29,195
"Why,
thank you very much

271
00:12:29,197 --> 00:12:30,696
"for going to the grocery
store," he said,

272
00:12:30,698 --> 00:12:33,432
dripping with sarcasm.

273
00:12:33,434 --> 00:12:35,133
Oh, I figured
you'd want a break

274
00:12:35,135 --> 00:12:37,737
from not writing ever.

275
00:12:37,739 --> 00:12:41,340
With that fatal blow,
she won the joust.

276
00:12:41,342 --> 00:12:43,176
- Well played.
- Hmm. Thank you.

277
00:12:43,178 --> 00:12:44,744
- This is Stephanie.
- Hi, Stephanie.

278
00:12:44,746 --> 00:12:46,512
Her kid goes to Warfield
with our kid.

279
00:12:46,514 --> 00:12:47,950
She read your book.

280
00:12:49,083 --> 00:12:50,582
I did. I loved it!

281
00:12:50,584 --> 00:12:52,218
It reminded me
of William Thackeray.

282
00:12:52,220 --> 00:12:53,418
She really read it.

283
00:12:53,420 --> 00:12:55,153
Wow, not many people

284
00:12:55,155 --> 00:12:56,522
trot out Thackeray
as a reference.

285
00:12:56,524 --> 00:12:58,657
Oh, I was an English
major at Barnard.

286
00:12:58,659 --> 00:13:00,058
It was pre-mommy brain.

287
00:13:00,060 --> 00:13:01,627
I did my thesis
on the <i>Canterbury Tales.</i>

288
00:13:01,629 --> 00:13:03,662
"And with that word
Arcite gan espye,

289
00:13:03,664 --> 00:13:05,998
"whereas this lady
roamed to and fro."

290
00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:09,203
"And with that sight,
her beauty hurt him so."

291
00:13:10,672 --> 00:13:12,271
I'm sorry, do you guys
wanna get a room?

292
00:13:12,273 --> 00:13:14,009
Am I breaking this up?

293
00:13:14,375 --> 00:13:15,308
I like that.

294
00:13:15,310 --> 00:13:17,643
Hey, do you want me
to make you a drink?

295
00:13:17,645 --> 00:13:19,311
No. I'm good.
You guys enjoy.

296
00:13:19,313 --> 00:13:20,613
I'm gonna head upstairs
for a shower.

297
00:13:20,615 --> 00:13:22,614
Okay.

298
00:13:22,616 --> 00:13:24,683
Nice to meet you,
Sharon.

299
00:13:24,685 --> 00:13:27,519
Yeah. It's lovely
to meet you.

300
00:13:27,521 --> 00:13:29,321
He's terrible with names.

301
00:13:29,323 --> 00:13:31,691
Oh, yeah. I mean,
Stephanie's crazy.

302
00:13:31,693 --> 00:13:34,726
Like P-H-what?

303
00:13:34,728 --> 00:13:37,062
You guys are
such a cute couple.

304
00:13:37,064 --> 00:13:38,797
Yeah, we're on the verge
of bankruptcy,

305
00:13:38,799 --> 00:13:41,133
and we can't find
a decent nanny

306
00:13:41,135 --> 00:13:42,471
in all of Connecticut, so...

307
00:13:43,704 --> 00:13:45,037
Drowning.

308
00:13:45,039 --> 00:13:46,705
If you ever need me
to pick up Nicky

309
00:13:46,707 --> 00:13:48,306
after school
and take him to my house,

310
00:13:48,308 --> 00:13:50,578
even if you just need
the night off...

311
00:13:51,379 --> 00:13:52,644
You'd do that for me?

312
00:13:52,646 --> 00:13:54,215
Yeah. Anything.

313
00:14:03,390 --> 00:14:04,791
<i>Hi, moms, Stephanie here.</i>

314
00:14:04,793 --> 00:14:07,563
<i>If it's your first visit to
the vlog, a hearty welcome.</i>

315
00:14:08,563 --> 00:14:10,529
<i>Today's theme
is friendship.</i>

316
00:14:10,531 --> 00:14:12,667
<i>So today,
I thought we would make</i>

317
00:14:14,369 --> 00:14:16,301
<i>friendship bracelets!</i>

318
00:14:16,303 --> 00:14:17,836
<i>I have never understood</i>

319
00:14:17,838 --> 00:14:20,072
<i>these silly,
hurtful divisions</i>

320
00:14:20,074 --> 00:14:22,307
<i>between working moms
and stay-at-home moms.</i>

321
00:14:22,309 --> 00:14:23,743
<i>Honestly, I have
found it difficult</i>

322
00:14:23,745 --> 00:14:25,577
<i>to make friends with either.</i>

323
00:14:25,579 --> 00:14:28,214
Emily! Hi,
what's up, lady?

324
00:14:28,216 --> 00:14:29,648
<i>Hey, I was
wondering if I could</i>

325
00:14:29,650 --> 00:14:31,383
<i>take you up on your offer
to pick up Nicky.</i>

326
00:14:31,385 --> 00:14:33,386
<i>I'm in a meeting
with no end in sight.</i>

327
00:14:33,388 --> 00:14:35,187
Uh, yeah, I'm
happy to help.

328
00:14:35,189 --> 00:14:38,123
Actually, I just got this
jumbo set of Perler beads...

329
00:14:38,125 --> 00:14:39,591
<i>Yeah, yeah, okay.
You're the best.</i>

330
00:14:39,593 --> 00:14:42,527
Okay. Um, just... Does Nicky
have any dietary restrictions?

331
00:14:42,529 --> 00:14:45,697
<i>Yeah, just don't feed him
shit he doesn't like. Thanks.</i>

332
00:14:45,699 --> 00:14:48,267
Don't feed...
Okay.

333
00:14:48,269 --> 00:14:50,172
Oh, my God, she's so funny.

334
00:14:51,239 --> 00:14:53,672
Whoo!

335
00:14:53,674 --> 00:14:56,475
No, no, no, Dennis,
this is what's gonna happen.

336
00:14:56,477 --> 00:14:57,844
I'm gonna do my job,

337
00:14:57,846 --> 00:14:59,277
you're gonna
take some pills,

338
00:14:59,279 --> 00:15:01,413
and then I'm gonna
call you later. Okay?

339
00:15:01,415 --> 00:15:03,117
What? Oh, oh,
I can't hear you.

340
00:15:04,149 --> 00:15:04,517
I'm in an elevator.

341
00:15:04,519 --> 00:15:06,418
I am hungry for flesh!

342
00:15:11,726 --> 00:15:14,759
Just Darth Mommy,
it's this game...

343
00:15:14,761 --> 00:15:16,162
It's really silly.

344
00:15:16,164 --> 00:15:17,463
Honestly, his dad
was much better

345
00:15:17,465 --> 00:15:18,663
at the roughhousing stuff.

346
00:15:18,665 --> 00:15:20,432
- Don't do that.
- Do what?

347
00:15:20,434 --> 00:15:21,868
Don't denigrate
your good parenting

348
00:15:21,870 --> 00:15:23,735
to comfort me
for my shitty parenting.

349
00:15:23,737 --> 00:15:25,504
Oh, gosh, no,
Emily, that's...

350
00:15:25,506 --> 00:15:26,705
That's not
what I was doing at all.

351
00:15:26,707 --> 00:15:28,206
I think you're
a super mom.

352
00:15:28,208 --> 00:15:29,441
Oh, no, you don't.

353
00:15:29,443 --> 00:15:30,509
Come on, your kid had

354
00:15:30,511 --> 00:15:31,811
lobster bisque for lunch
the other day.

355
00:15:31,813 --> 00:15:33,613
I'm lucky if I remember
my kid's lunch box.

356
00:15:33,615 --> 00:15:34,814
Honestly, it's fine.

357
00:15:34,816 --> 00:15:37,219
The nicest thing I could do for
Nicky is blow my brains out.

358
00:15:41,422 --> 00:15:42,555
I'm kidding.

359
00:15:42,557 --> 00:15:44,523
Right. Yeah. Well...

360
00:15:44,525 --> 00:15:48,161
You do work
in the city, so...

361
00:15:48,163 --> 00:15:50,332
- Oh, my gosh!
- Oh, my gosh!

362
00:15:55,837 --> 00:15:57,637
Did you just
take my picture?

363
00:15:57,639 --> 00:15:59,205
I'm yearbook mom.

364
00:15:59,207 --> 00:16:00,940
Did I ask you
to take my picture?

365
00:16:00,942 --> 00:16:02,108
Erase it.

366
00:16:02,110 --> 00:16:04,576
You look really chic, it's
just for "Faces and Places."

367
00:16:04,578 --> 00:16:05,912
Just for the other parents.

368
00:16:05,914 --> 00:16:07,747
Erase it or I'll slap
a fucking injunction

369
00:16:07,749 --> 00:16:09,348
on your yearbook,
do you understand?

370
00:16:09,350 --> 00:16:10,883
Yeah. Okay.

371
00:16:10,885 --> 00:16:12,685
Yeah, it's gone.

372
00:16:12,687 --> 00:16:14,287
Whoa. Bye-bye.

373
00:16:14,289 --> 00:16:15,787
Don't do that again.

374
00:16:15,789 --> 00:16:17,590
Oh, my gosh,
I'm so sorry.

375
00:16:17,592 --> 00:16:20,692
Or, I didn't mean
to offend you.

376
00:16:20,694 --> 00:16:22,427
Um... I'm
sure that stuff's

377
00:16:22,429 --> 00:16:23,796
really sensitive
in your industry.

378
00:16:23,798 --> 00:16:25,431
Oh, no. It's all good.

379
00:16:25,433 --> 00:16:26,566
I guess I'm probably
not the kind of person

380
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:27,667
you're normally
friends with.

381
00:16:27,669 --> 00:16:30,636
Oh, you do not wanna be
friends with me. Trust me.

382
00:16:30,638 --> 00:16:31,870
Dennis, sweetie,

383
00:16:31,872 --> 00:16:33,538
let's try this again. Um...

384
00:16:33,540 --> 00:16:34,941
Okay, I want you
to go home

385
00:16:34,943 --> 00:16:36,341
and chill the fuck out

386
00:16:36,343 --> 00:16:37,813
and don't ever call me
again. Bye.

387
00:16:39,547 --> 00:16:40,879
That's how
you talk to your boss?

388
00:16:40,881 --> 00:16:42,848
Yeah. You know,
you gotta go right at 'em.

389
00:16:42,850 --> 00:16:44,249
Especially the powerful ones.

390
00:16:44,251 --> 00:16:45,721
Or they will fuck you
in the face.

391
00:16:46,453 --> 00:16:48,753
Yeah, I get that.

392
00:16:48,755 --> 00:16:50,288
Wanna get out of here?

393
00:16:50,290 --> 00:16:51,657
Mommy needs a drink.

394
00:16:51,659 --> 00:16:53,459
Yeah.

395
00:16:53,461 --> 00:16:54,627
Totally.

396
00:16:54,629 --> 00:16:55,898
Nicky!

397
00:16:56,864 --> 00:16:58,797
Okay, guys...

398
00:16:58,799 --> 00:17:00,932
I guess we're going.

399
00:17:00,934 --> 00:17:03,636
Hey!
Nicky, come! Now!

400
00:17:03,638 --> 00:17:05,937
Okay. I have a gift for you.
Please close your eyes.

401
00:17:05,939 --> 00:17:07,305
- Mmm-mmm.
- Yeah. Hold out

402
00:17:07,307 --> 00:17:08,374
your tattoo hand, please.

403
00:17:08,376 --> 00:17:09,875
This is happening.
I'll wait all day.

404
00:17:09,877 --> 00:17:11,413
- Are you propositioning me?
- Yes.

405
00:17:12,679 --> 00:17:14,283
Here. I made that for you.

406
00:17:15,882 --> 00:17:17,015
You made this for me?

407
00:17:17,017 --> 00:17:19,517
Thought it would go with that
pinstriped suit you have.

408
00:17:19,519 --> 00:17:20,986
Really? That's nice.

409
00:17:20,988 --> 00:17:22,921
No one does stuff
like this for me.

410
00:17:22,923 --> 00:17:26,492
I used to watch those
<i>Bewitched</i> reruns on TV Land,

411
00:17:26,494 --> 00:17:28,026
and I always thought
it was so classy

412
00:17:28,028 --> 00:17:29,427
when Darrin
would come from work

413
00:17:29,429 --> 00:17:31,330
and Samantha
would fix him a martini.

414
00:17:31,332 --> 00:17:33,898
Every time we do this,
I feel so high-tone.

415
00:17:33,900 --> 00:17:37,637
My God, you're such a nerd.

416
00:17:37,639 --> 00:17:39,905
Ugh. Fuck this.
I need a real martini.

417
00:17:39,907 --> 00:17:41,540
- This one's not real?
- Nope.

418
00:17:41,542 --> 00:17:43,442
Sean and I had the real thing
at Dukes in London.

419
00:17:43,444 --> 00:17:45,744
The key, frozen gin.

420
00:17:45,746 --> 00:17:48,513
And a frozen glass. Here.

421
00:17:48,515 --> 00:17:49,750
Move, bad martini.

422
00:17:50,584 --> 00:17:51,917
Okay.

423
00:17:51,919 --> 00:17:53,852
Little bit of vermouth.

424
00:17:53,854 --> 00:17:57,023
Swirl it around, dump.

425
00:17:57,025 --> 00:17:59,425
Don't you dare
touch that wash cloth.

426
00:17:59,427 --> 00:18:01,763
Then add in the gin.

427
00:18:02,397 --> 00:18:03,829
Mmm.

428
00:18:03,831 --> 00:18:04,900
Cut your twist.

429
00:18:07,567 --> 00:18:10,770
Squeeze it, outside out.
Get a nice little mist.

430
00:18:10,772 --> 00:18:12,772
Lick the edges. Voila.

431
00:18:12,774 --> 00:18:14,572
And don't add
fucking ice. Ever.

432
00:18:14,574 --> 00:18:16,442
We don't like ice anymore?

433
00:18:16,444 --> 00:18:17,842
That shit ruins everything.

434
00:18:17,844 --> 00:18:19,544
Tough day at work?

435
00:18:19,546 --> 00:18:21,379
I just need to hit
the reset button sometimes.

436
00:18:21,381 --> 00:18:23,049
Oh, cheers!

437
00:18:23,051 --> 00:18:24,620
Cheers.

438
00:18:33,894 --> 00:18:35,429
Can you make me
one of those?

439
00:18:37,098 --> 00:18:38,798
Do I look reset?

440
00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:40,369
Because I feel reset.

441
00:18:41,669 --> 00:18:43,668
You smell good.

442
00:18:43,670 --> 00:18:45,670
What is that perfume?
You smell so good.

443
00:18:45,672 --> 00:18:47,473
- I wish I smelled like you.
- Thank you.

444
00:18:47,475 --> 00:18:49,774
It's one of Dennis'.
I could get you one.

445
00:18:49,776 --> 00:18:51,010
I could get you
a bathtub full

446
00:18:51,012 --> 00:18:52,078
if you'd like.

447
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:56,916
I would love it, girlfriend.

448
00:18:56,918 --> 00:18:58,083
Thank you.

449
00:18:58,085 --> 00:19:01,821
I'm really unhappy with myself
for taking that picture...

450
00:19:01,823 --> 00:19:03,356
Oh, my God, are you
still talking about that?

451
00:19:03,358 --> 00:19:04,622
...without asking,
it's so rude.

452
00:19:04,624 --> 00:19:06,492
- Please, stop. Forget it.
- Just, like, "Paparazzo."

453
00:19:06,494 --> 00:19:07,526
You are so nice.

454
00:19:07,528 --> 00:19:09,028
I have no idea how you've
survived this long.

455
00:19:09,030 --> 00:19:11,397
I'm not as nice
as you think so.

456
00:19:11,399 --> 00:19:12,732
Are you baiting me?

457
00:19:12,734 --> 00:19:14,803
No. I'm just saying.

458
00:19:16,803 --> 00:19:19,472
- Everybody has a dark side.
- Mmm-hmm.

459
00:19:19,474 --> 00:19:21,706
Some of us are better
at hiding it than others.

460
00:19:21,708 --> 00:19:23,475
Wanna trade confessions?

461
00:19:23,477 --> 00:19:25,077
- No, no. No.
- Come on.

462
00:19:25,079 --> 00:19:27,646
What's the wildest thing
you've ever done?

463
00:19:27,648 --> 00:19:29,517
Oh, no, I don't know,
I shouldn't.

464
00:19:30,016 --> 00:19:31,417
You go first.

465
00:19:31,419 --> 00:19:32,688
Okay, um...

466
00:19:34,088 --> 00:19:36,621
Few months ago,
Sean and I had his TA over

467
00:19:36,623 --> 00:19:39,428
for dinner, and drinks,
and a threesome.

468
00:19:41,629 --> 00:19:43,529
Was Sean jealous of him?

469
00:19:43,531 --> 00:19:44,733
Did I say it was a him?

470
00:19:47,735 --> 00:19:50,969
That's very cool, sis.
Very cool.

471
00:19:50,971 --> 00:19:52,437
- You okay?
- Yeah!

472
00:19:52,439 --> 00:19:53,805
I don't mean
to freak you out.

473
00:19:53,807 --> 00:19:56,542
Hello! I'm not freaked out,
maybe you're freaked out.

474
00:19:56,544 --> 00:19:57,709
- Okay.
- Because I'm not freaked out.

475
00:19:57,711 --> 00:19:59,779
I'm cool.
I'm laissez-faire.

476
00:19:59,781 --> 00:20:01,880
Okay, laissez-faire.

477
00:20:01,882 --> 00:20:03,014
I mean, you're not exactly
a sexual maverick.

478
00:20:03,016 --> 00:20:04,149
And that's fine.

479
00:20:04,151 --> 00:20:05,821
You know,
prudes are people, too.

480
00:20:07,721 --> 00:20:09,123
I wanna know
your secret. Tell me.

481
00:20:11,626 --> 00:20:13,562
My dad died when I was
a senior in high school.

482
00:20:14,762 --> 00:20:16,762
<i>And</i>

483
00:20:16,764 --> 00:20:18,132
<i>this boy showed up
to the funeral.</i>

484
00:20:20,501 --> 00:20:22,667
<i>His name was Chris.</i>

485
00:20:22,669 --> 00:20:25,437
<i>And I guess he was
the spitting image</i>

486
00:20:25,439 --> 00:20:27,074
<i>of my father,
30 years younger.</i>

487
00:20:29,610 --> 00:20:33,915
<i>My mom thought
she saw a ghost.</i>

488
00:20:38,820 --> 00:20:40,655
<i>And it turned out
he was my half-brother.</i>

489
00:20:42,957 --> 00:20:45,991
That's your whole secret?
That your dad had an affair?

490
00:20:45,993 --> 00:20:47,659
No!

491
00:20:47,661 --> 00:20:49,727
Okay, can you
just tell me your secret?

492
00:20:49,729 --> 00:20:51,866
Come on,
spill it, dark side.

493
00:20:52,566 --> 00:20:54,966
So, Chris...

494
00:20:54,968 --> 00:20:57,869
<i>It was too late for him to
drive home, so he stayed over.</i>

495
00:20:57,871 --> 00:20:59,440
<i>We stayed up
all night, talking,</i>

496
00:20:59,841 --> 00:21:00,976
<i>and</i>

497
00:21:01,976 --> 00:21:03,576
<i>my dad was...</i>

498
00:21:03,578 --> 00:21:05,977
My dad was really the person
who understood me.

499
00:21:05,979 --> 00:21:07,748
And he was gone, so...

500
00:21:08,815 --> 00:21:12,917
I was alone, alone
for the first time.

501
00:21:12,919 --> 00:21:16,589
<i>But he sees me, you know?</i>

502
00:21:16,591 --> 00:21:17,926
<i>Like, he really sees me.</i>

503
00:21:19,861 --> 00:21:21,796
And we just stared at each
other for the longest time.

504
00:21:23,563 --> 00:21:24,730
You can't be too drunk
in my house

505
00:21:24,732 --> 00:21:25,930
not to finish the story.
What happened?

506
00:21:25,932 --> 00:21:27,632
Uh, yeah. Uh...

507
00:21:27,634 --> 00:21:29,702
Okay, so, I don't know,

508
00:21:29,704 --> 00:21:31,971
maybe it's not so racy
where you're from, but...

509
00:21:31,973 --> 00:21:34,072
Stop avoiding.
Tell me what happened.

510
00:21:34,074 --> 00:21:35,206
<i>We stood there</i>

511
00:21:35,208 --> 00:21:36,641
- <i>for the longest time.</i>
- <i>Uh-huh.</i>

512
00:21:36,643 --> 00:21:38,644
<i>So I went in to hug him,</i>

513
00:21:38,646 --> 00:21:39,981
<i>and we kissed.</i>

514
00:21:40,781 --> 00:21:42,217
<i>I know, it's so gross.</i>

515
00:21:42,984 --> 00:21:44,183
- The end?
- Yeah.

516
00:21:44,185 --> 00:21:45,650
- You just kissed?
- Yeah, we kissed.

517
00:21:45,652 --> 00:21:47,887
You just kissed
your brother?

518
00:21:47,889 --> 00:21:50,188
- <i>Yeah. It's so...</i>
- <i>What?</i>

519
00:21:50,190 --> 00:21:51,590
<i>Ugh. It's so lurid.</i>

520
00:21:51,592 --> 00:21:53,591
<i>It's my half-brother.
It's not my brother.</i>

521
00:21:53,593 --> 00:21:54,792
<i>He's your
half-brother, though?</i>

522
00:21:54,794 --> 00:21:56,028
- <i>Okay.</i>
- <i>He's my...</i>

523
00:21:56,030 --> 00:21:57,062
<i>Yeah, there's more.</i>

524
00:21:57,064 --> 00:21:58,563
- <i>Mmm-hmm.</i>
- <i>No. No, there's not more.</i>

525
00:21:58,565 --> 00:22:00,131
No, no.
Yeah, there is.

526
00:22:00,133 --> 00:22:02,201
- So...
- You fucked him.

527
00:22:02,203 --> 00:22:03,601
What?

528
00:22:03,603 --> 00:22:04,969
<i>Was he good?</i>

529
00:22:04,971 --> 00:22:07,171
<i>That is so disgusting.</i>

530
00:22:07,173 --> 00:22:09,174
<i>I don't know...</i>

531
00:22:09,176 --> 00:22:11,276
<i>You didn't fuck him?
Tell me you didn't fuck him.</i>

532
00:22:11,278 --> 00:22:12,811
<i>I don't know
what's going on in your...</i>

533
00:22:12,813 --> 00:22:13,913
- <i>Swear.</i>
- <i>I swear.</i>

534
00:22:13,915 --> 00:22:15,717
Swear on your
dad's grave.

535
00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:34,836
Oh, my God.

536
00:22:37,705 --> 00:22:38,638
Don't.

537
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:41,740
- You brotherfucker!
- No. Don't.

538
00:22:41,742 --> 00:22:43,175
This is good.

539
00:22:43,177 --> 00:22:45,711
Oh, my God!

540
00:22:45,713 --> 00:22:47,580
I've got a brotherfucker
taking care of my kid.

541
00:22:47,582 --> 00:22:48,847
I shouldn't
have even said anything.

542
00:22:48,849 --> 00:22:50,882
Brotherfucker.

543
00:22:50,884 --> 00:22:53,718
You know what? I don't know.
It's these stupid martinis.

544
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:55,253
Hey, brotherfucker, do you
wanna stay for dinner?

545
00:22:55,255 --> 00:22:56,589
I shouldn't have
even said anything.

546
00:22:56,591 --> 00:22:58,657
Yeah, I do wanna
stay for dinner.

547
00:22:58,659 --> 00:22:59,757
That would be lovely.

548
00:22:59,759 --> 00:23:01,025
I can't wait to see
what you cook.

549
00:23:01,027 --> 00:23:02,695
You know what?

550
00:23:02,697 --> 00:23:05,196
I'm gonna cook you
the best meal of your life,

551
00:23:05,198 --> 00:23:06,764
and you're gonna
feel really bad

552
00:23:06,766 --> 00:23:08,233
about being
so mean right now.

553
00:23:08,235 --> 00:23:09,801
- Brotherfucker!
- Ow!

554
00:23:09,803 --> 00:23:11,270
I like you!

555
00:23:11,272 --> 00:23:13,205
Hi, moms,
Stephanie here.

556
00:23:13,207 --> 00:23:15,073
Today we'll be talking about
the perfect first aid kit...

557
00:23:15,075 --> 00:23:17,376
so you're never left in
need during a crisis.

558
00:23:21,181 --> 00:23:22,281
Hi!

559
00:23:22,283 --> 00:23:23,349
<i>Stephanie.
Thank God you picked up.</i>

560
00:23:23,351 --> 00:23:25,250
<i>Hey, I just have
a little emergency.</i>

561
00:23:25,252 --> 00:23:27,252
Oh, really? That's
a coincidence. I was just...

562
00:23:27,254 --> 00:23:28,954
<i>I need your help.</i>

563
00:23:28,956 --> 00:23:30,155
Are you okay?

564
00:23:30,157 --> 00:23:33,157
<i>I'm fine, but I do need
just a simple favor.</i>

565
00:23:33,159 --> 00:23:34,626
<i>Can you grab
Nicky from school?</i>

566
00:23:34,628 --> 00:23:36,829
<i>Sean's in London, his mother
broke her fucking hip,</i>

567
00:23:36,831 --> 00:23:38,263
<i>and I got a big fire
to put out at work.</i>

568
00:23:38,265 --> 00:23:39,732
Oh, yeah. Oh, my God!

569
00:23:39,734 --> 00:23:41,703
Poor Sean,
poor you. Um...

570
00:23:42,736 --> 00:23:44,235
Anything I can
do to help. Yeah.

571
00:23:44,237 --> 00:23:45,803
<i>You're the best.
Hey, I gotta run,</i>

572
00:23:45,805 --> 00:23:47,639
<i>but I'll get you back
for this, okay?</i>

573
00:23:47,641 --> 00:23:49,707
Of course,
Nicky's in good hands.

574
00:23:49,709 --> 00:23:52,144
<i>Hey, Stephanie,
you're a good person.</i>

575
00:23:52,146 --> 00:23:53,279
<i>True friend.
I mean that.</i>

576
00:23:53,281 --> 00:23:56,318
Don't worry about it.
I will talk to you later. Bye.

577
00:24:01,788 --> 00:24:03,421
Freeze!
Do you know what I see?

578
00:24:03,423 --> 00:24:05,224
I see two boys
getting a play date!

579
00:24:05,226 --> 00:24:07,959
Yeah!

580
00:24:07,961 --> 00:24:10,161
Stephanie, that's so great
you took the nanny job.

581
00:24:10,163 --> 00:24:11,763
- Nanny job?
- Yeah, for Emily.

582
00:24:11,765 --> 00:24:13,034
I know she was
looking for one.

583
00:24:15,669 --> 00:24:17,436
Well, that...

584
00:24:17,438 --> 00:24:20,339
We're just friends. I'm
helping her as a friend.

585
00:24:20,341 --> 00:24:22,840
Oh, God, I'm so sorry.

586
00:24:22,842 --> 00:24:24,842
I didn't realize
you guys were so close.

587
00:24:24,844 --> 00:24:26,878
Well, we are!

588
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,982
We drink martinis together.
Strong ones from London.

589
00:24:29,984 --> 00:24:31,315
Okay, boys, if you
don't wrestle in the car,

590
00:24:31,317 --> 00:24:32,717
I'm gonna
make you fruit pops!

591
00:24:32,719 --> 00:24:35,222
- Let's go, let's go!
- Yay!

592
00:24:37,123 --> 00:24:39,891
She doesn't know
she's working for free.

593
00:24:45,099 --> 00:24:46,465
Whoo!

594
00:24:57,945 --> 00:24:59,311
<i>This is Emily Nelson,</i>

595
00:24:59,313 --> 00:25:01,746
<i>Director of Public Relations
for Dennis Nylon Holdings.</i>

596
00:25:01,748 --> 00:25:03,215
<i>Leave a message
or go fuck yourself.</i>

597
00:25:03,217 --> 00:25:06,851
Hey, uh, Em,
it's Stephanie. Um...

598
00:25:06,853 --> 00:25:09,321
I know you're probably
knee-deep in that crisis.

599
00:25:09,323 --> 00:25:11,255
But Nicky's asking when
you're coming to get him,

600
00:25:11,257 --> 00:25:13,391
and I don't know
what to say, so...

601
00:25:13,393 --> 00:25:14,892
Just let me know.

602
00:25:14,894 --> 00:25:18,030
And I hope you're hanging
in there. Give 'em heck.

603
00:25:18,032 --> 00:25:20,799
Stephanie Smothers.
I'm a close friend of hers,

604
00:25:20,801 --> 00:25:22,067
I'm watching her son.

605
00:25:22,069 --> 00:25:24,002
Can you just tell me
where she is

606
00:25:24,004 --> 00:25:25,337
and when she
might be back?

607
00:25:25,339 --> 00:25:28,240
Yeah, she's in Miami
for a few days.

608
00:25:28,242 --> 00:25:29,907
Did you wanna
leave a message?

609
00:25:29,909 --> 00:25:31,810
I'm sorry,
did you say a few days?

610
00:25:31,812 --> 00:25:33,244
Yeah, can you hold
for a second, please?

611
00:25:33,246 --> 00:25:35,313
<i>She didn't say
that it was gonna be a few...</i>

612
00:25:35,315 --> 00:25:37,049
Oh, for the love of Joe.

613
00:25:37,051 --> 00:25:38,117
Oh!

614
00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:40,753
<i>Yes?</i>

615
00:25:40,755 --> 00:25:43,388
Sean, hi! Um, it's Stephanie.
I'm so sorry to bother you.

616
00:25:43,390 --> 00:25:44,857
I got your number
from the school directory.

617
00:25:44,859 --> 00:25:46,058
Has something
happened to Nicky?

618
00:25:46,060 --> 00:25:48,793
No!
Uh, Nicky's fine.

619
00:25:48,795 --> 00:25:50,896
Yeah, sorry, he's fine.
He's here with me.

620
00:25:50,898 --> 00:25:54,069
Um, Emily, though,
asked me to watch him,

621
00:25:55,870 --> 00:25:58,403
and that was two days ago,
and I haven't heard from her.

622
00:25:58,405 --> 00:25:59,772
<i>Have you guys been in touch?</i>

623
00:25:59,774 --> 00:26:01,072
Christ, two days?

624
00:26:01,074 --> 00:26:02,108
<i>What'd she tell you?</i>

625
00:26:02,110 --> 00:26:04,408
Um, she said she had
to put out a big fire.

626
00:26:04,410 --> 00:26:05,276
And I called her office,

627
00:26:05,278 --> 00:26:06,911
and then they said
she was in Miami?

628
00:26:06,913 --> 00:26:08,480
<i>Yeah, that sounds
about right.</i>

629
00:26:08,482 --> 00:26:09,982
I mean, I've played through

630
00:26:09,984 --> 00:26:11,449
some of these
emergencies before,

631
00:26:11,451 --> 00:26:13,851
<i>and once she knows that
Nicky's being taken care of,</i>

632
00:26:13,853 --> 00:26:16,053
she disappears
for quite some time.

633
00:26:16,055 --> 00:26:18,290
Oh, fun! Um...

634
00:26:18,292 --> 00:26:19,358
I'm flying back tomorrow.

635
00:26:19,360 --> 00:26:21,793
I'll pick up Nicky as soon
as I'm on the ground.

636
00:26:21,795 --> 00:26:22,860
<i>All righty?</i>

637
00:26:22,862 --> 00:26:24,198
All righty.

638
00:26:29,035 --> 00:26:30,269
Ah.

639
00:26:30,271 --> 00:26:32,204
Miss Canterbury Tales.

640
00:26:32,206 --> 00:26:34,039
Um, her assistant,
Valerie, said that

641
00:26:34,041 --> 00:26:35,307
she couldn't get in touch
with her, either.

642
00:26:35,309 --> 00:26:39,177
Which is weird, because it's
a work thing, an emergency.

643
00:26:39,179 --> 00:26:41,513
Some of the moms think
we should go to the police.

644
00:26:41,515 --> 00:26:42,580
Jesus.

645
00:26:42,582 --> 00:26:44,416
Has it really come to this?

646
00:26:44,418 --> 00:26:46,150
Do you want tea?

647
00:26:46,152 --> 00:26:48,419
You know what?
Let's do it.

648
00:26:48,421 --> 00:26:51,122
Not the tea. The police.

649
00:26:51,124 --> 00:26:52,890
- Sean?
- Yeah.

650
00:26:52,892 --> 00:26:54,292
The police are here.

651
00:26:54,294 --> 00:26:55,330
Okay.

652
00:27:02,035 --> 00:27:03,936
And when was the last time

653
00:27:03,938 --> 00:27:06,103
either of you heard from her?

654
00:27:06,105 --> 00:27:08,072
Three days ago.

655
00:27:08,074 --> 00:27:10,274
I was in London.
My mother broke her hip.

656
00:27:10,276 --> 00:27:12,410
- Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
- Thank you.

657
00:27:12,412 --> 00:27:14,012
Well, she said
it was a work crisis?

658
00:27:14,014 --> 00:27:16,148
Yeah. She has
a very high-profile job

659
00:27:16,150 --> 00:27:18,550
and a full staff
that she oversees.

660
00:27:18,552 --> 00:27:20,151
Most times
when a woman vanishes,

661
00:27:20,153 --> 00:27:21,552
she has a reason.

662
00:27:21,554 --> 00:27:23,254
What are you implying,
exactly?

663
00:27:23,256 --> 00:27:25,157
You two didn't
have a fight?

664
00:27:25,159 --> 00:27:26,591
Something to make you
run off to London?

665
00:27:26,593 --> 00:27:28,226
Are you saying that
I broke my mother's hip?

666
00:27:28,228 --> 00:27:30,230
You leave town,
your wife takes off.

667
00:27:30,930 --> 00:27:33,064
Maybe there's, um,

668
00:27:33,066 --> 00:27:35,567
a close friend she might be
spending some time with.

669
00:27:35,569 --> 00:27:37,502
Excuse me,
that's very rude.

670
00:27:37,504 --> 00:27:39,538
He is a dedicated
husband and father.

671
00:27:39,540 --> 00:27:41,406
I have seen him with his
wife, let me tell you,

672
00:27:41,408 --> 00:27:43,641
they've got more chemistry
than a science fair.

673
00:27:43,643 --> 00:27:44,776
Just exploring
all avenues, ma'am.

674
00:27:44,778 --> 00:27:47,381
Well, that avenue is a dead
end, so you can drop it.

675
00:27:48,282 --> 00:27:50,448
And where's
Emily's family?

676
00:27:50,450 --> 00:27:52,083
She doesn't have any.

677
00:27:52,085 --> 00:27:53,185
She was an only child,

678
00:27:53,187 --> 00:27:56,024
and her mother and father died
when she was a teenager.

679
00:27:57,056 --> 00:27:58,624
I'm sorry,
I didn't know that.

680
00:27:58,626 --> 00:28:00,157
We'll file
a missing person's report

681
00:28:00,159 --> 00:28:02,927
and contact you
in the next couple of days.

682
00:28:02,929 --> 00:28:04,329
If she doesn't turn up,

683
00:28:04,331 --> 00:28:06,631
we'll contact the local
authorities in Miami.

684
00:28:06,633 --> 00:28:09,067
Not planning any more trips,
are you, Mr. Townsend?

685
00:28:09,069 --> 00:28:10,135
No.

686
00:28:10,137 --> 00:28:12,169
I'm gonna be right here.

687
00:28:12,171 --> 00:28:14,508
I'm gonna be at my house
with my son.

688
00:28:15,309 --> 00:28:17,145
We can show ourselves out.

689
00:28:19,146 --> 00:28:21,946
<i>God knows we've had
our troubles in the past,</i>

690
00:28:21,948 --> 00:28:24,917
but I don't think she'd just
up and leave her child.

691
00:28:24,919 --> 00:28:28,153
No, God, she adores Nicky.
She wouldn't do that.

692
00:28:28,155 --> 00:28:30,121
She is an enigma, my wife.

693
00:28:30,123 --> 00:28:31,590
That's what drew me to her.

694
00:28:31,592 --> 00:28:33,157
It can also
make her impossible.

695
00:28:33,159 --> 00:28:35,092
She can be
so fiercely private.

696
00:28:35,094 --> 00:28:36,061
She sure doesn't like

697
00:28:36,063 --> 00:28:37,195
having her picture taken,
I'll tell you that.

698
00:28:37,197 --> 00:28:39,430
I remember this one time,
she shut down my Facebook

699
00:28:39,432 --> 00:28:41,599
because I posted up
a family picture.

700
00:28:41,601 --> 00:28:43,601
Ugh. Social media
is so tricky.

701
00:28:43,603 --> 00:28:44,936
I can get
to close to her,

702
00:28:44,938 --> 00:28:46,571
I can never quite reach her.

703
00:28:46,573 --> 00:28:49,308
She's like
a beautiful ghost.

704
00:28:49,310 --> 00:28:51,142
Never entirely there.

705
00:28:51,144 --> 00:28:52,577
That's so poetic.

706
00:28:52,579 --> 00:28:54,612
That's why you're
such a good writer.

707
00:28:54,614 --> 00:28:57,215
I'm not a writer
anymore, Stephanie.

708
00:28:57,217 --> 00:28:59,117
I gave all that up
just to chase this woman

709
00:28:59,119 --> 00:29:00,121
for the rest of my life.

710
00:29:02,323 --> 00:29:04,388
I should order a taxi
and go home.

711
00:29:04,390 --> 00:29:06,058
Yeah.

712
00:29:06,060 --> 00:29:09,530
Oh, gosh, it's 1:25, they
stop driving at 1:00 here.

713
00:29:11,698 --> 00:29:13,532
That couch pulls out, um,

714
00:29:13,534 --> 00:29:15,300
if you wanna stay over.

715
00:29:15,302 --> 00:29:17,135
I know Nicky would love it

716
00:29:17,137 --> 00:29:19,204
if you were here
in the morning.

717
00:29:19,206 --> 00:29:20,375
That would be lovely.

718
00:29:37,457 --> 00:29:39,291
Who wants
more B vitamins?

719
00:29:39,293 --> 00:29:40,458
- Yeah!
- I do!

720
00:29:40,460 --> 00:29:42,260
Yeah?
Are they nice?

721
00:29:42,262 --> 00:29:44,295
- Yeah.
- Yeah? Delicious?

722
00:29:44,297 --> 00:29:46,732
- Hi.
- Hey.

723
00:29:46,734 --> 00:29:48,166
Uh, what on Earth
are you making?

724
00:29:48,168 --> 00:29:50,435
These are
hangover smoothies.

725
00:29:50,437 --> 00:29:52,204
They get it
right out of you.

726
00:29:52,206 --> 00:29:54,438
And the kids love them.

727
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:56,041
Little tip,
they have a full portion

728
00:29:56,043 --> 00:29:57,175
of vegetables in them,

729
00:29:57,177 --> 00:29:58,176
and they don't even
know it.

730
00:29:58,178 --> 00:30:00,212
It's so hard to get kids
to eat their vegetables.

731
00:30:00,214 --> 00:30:01,215
Right?

732
00:30:02,349 --> 00:30:04,049
Mmm.

733
00:30:04,051 --> 00:30:05,320
Wanna try some?

734
00:30:05,686 --> 00:30:07,021
Great.

735
00:30:13,060 --> 00:30:14,294
Good?

736
00:30:16,662 --> 00:30:20,298
I think we should get ready
for school.

737
00:30:20,300 --> 00:30:21,970
Oh, school, school.

738
00:30:22,703 --> 00:30:24,168
<i>Hi, moms, Stephanie here.</i>

739
00:30:24,170 --> 00:30:25,637
<i>Today I'm making
a new recipe</i>

740
00:30:25,639 --> 00:30:27,805
<i>I learned
for a hangover smoothie.</i>

741
00:30:27,807 --> 00:30:28,807
<i>Uh, it's really nice.</i>

742
00:30:28,809 --> 00:30:30,775
<i>I especially
want to thank everybody</i>

743
00:30:30,777 --> 00:30:33,347
<i>who's written in
to ask about Emily.</i>

744
00:30:34,380 --> 00:30:36,016
<i>It's been four days now.</i>

745
00:30:36,717 --> 00:30:37,949
<i>So...</i>

746
00:30:37,951 --> 00:30:41,086
<i>The good news is that Sean
is home from London,</i>

747
00:30:41,088 --> 00:30:43,324
<i>and he's working very
closely with the police.</i>

748
00:30:43,823 --> 00:30:47,224
<i>Um, actually, moms,</i>

749
00:30:47,226 --> 00:30:50,094
<i>I know a lot of you
are hung up on the idea</i>

750
00:30:50,096 --> 00:30:52,164
<i>that the husband
is always the primary suspect.</i>

751
00:30:52,166 --> 00:30:54,034
<i>I know, I've seen</i>
Law & Order.

752
00:30:54,435 --> 00:30:55,699
<i>But, um...</i>

753
00:30:55,701 --> 00:30:58,235
<i>First, I'm here to tell you</i>

754
00:30:58,237 --> 00:31:01,138
<i>Sean was in London
when Emily disappeared.</i>

755
00:31:01,140 --> 00:31:03,140
<i>And some of you
have suggested</i>

756
00:31:03,142 --> 00:31:05,776
<i>that he did that
to set up an alibi,</i>

757
00:31:05,778 --> 00:31:10,415
<i>but he's an amazing husband
and an amazing father, so...</i>

758
00:31:10,417 --> 00:31:12,016
<i>The police
haven't been much help.</i>

759
00:31:12,018 --> 00:31:14,218
<i>But every mom knows that if you
want something done right,</i>

760
00:31:14,220 --> 00:31:16,353
<i>you have to do it yourself.</i>

761
00:31:16,355 --> 00:31:18,122
<i>I will leave
no stone unturned.</i>

762
00:31:18,124 --> 00:31:19,824
<i>I think that's
what Emily would want.</i>

763
00:31:19,826 --> 00:31:21,194
Dennis Nylon, please hold.

764
00:31:22,528 --> 00:31:24,297
Dennis Nylon, please hold.

765
00:31:25,431 --> 00:31:26,497
Thanks for holding.

766
00:31:26,499 --> 00:31:28,332
How may I direct your call?

767
00:31:28,334 --> 00:31:29,434
Hi, my name
is Stephanie...

768
00:31:29,436 --> 00:31:31,102
Dennis Nylon, please hold.

769
00:31:31,104 --> 00:31:32,803
My friend works here.
She's been missing...

770
00:31:32,805 --> 00:31:34,773
Thanks for holding.
How may I direct your call?

771
00:31:34,775 --> 00:31:36,707
I tried to call
her assistant.

772
00:31:36,709 --> 00:31:38,877
- Dennis Nylon, please hold.
- Valerie.

773
00:31:38,879 --> 00:31:39,945
She wasn't super helpful.

774
00:31:39,947 --> 00:31:41,513
Thanks for holding.
How may I direct your call?

775
00:31:41,515 --> 00:31:42,714
I can't tell
if you're talking to me.

776
00:31:42,716 --> 00:31:44,118
You're looking right at me.

777
00:31:45,149 --> 00:31:46,217
- Dennis Nylon, please hold.
- Okay.

778
00:31:46,219 --> 00:31:48,219
Thanks for holding.
How may I direct your call?

779
00:31:48,221 --> 00:31:49,553
Her name is Emily Nelson.

780
00:31:49,555 --> 00:31:51,289
She's the head
of the PR department.

781
00:31:51,291 --> 00:31:52,624
Emily's not in today.

782
00:31:52,626 --> 00:31:54,292
I know she's not in.

783
00:31:54,294 --> 00:31:56,561
- Dennis Nylon, please hold.
- Okay.

784
00:31:56,563 --> 00:31:58,429
Just gonna...

785
00:31:58,431 --> 00:32:00,898
Sorry. No, I am not sorry.

786
00:32:00,900 --> 00:32:04,602
I need to speak
to Dennis Nylon, please?

787
00:32:04,604 --> 00:32:06,271
A woman's missing, so...

788
00:32:06,273 --> 00:32:08,372
Mr. Nylon's
not here right now.

789
00:32:08,374 --> 00:32:09,507
Great, I'll wait.

790
00:32:09,509 --> 00:32:10,677
Knock yourself out.

791
00:32:11,578 --> 00:32:12,713
Okay.

792
00:32:28,829 --> 00:32:31,663
Dennis Nylon, please hold.

793
00:32:31,665 --> 00:32:32,930
Um, Mr. Nylon?

794
00:32:32,932 --> 00:32:34,799
We don't accept
unsolicited resumes.

795
00:32:34,801 --> 00:32:36,333
Cool, that's not why
I'm here.

796
00:32:36,335 --> 00:32:37,435
Um, we have a problem.

797
00:32:37,437 --> 00:32:39,236
We most certainly do.

798
00:32:39,238 --> 00:32:40,571
A friend of mine works in
your publicity department...

799
00:32:40,573 --> 00:32:42,142
Is that a vintage
Hermes scarf?

800
00:32:42,842 --> 00:32:44,309
My Aunt Frieda
gave it to me.

801
00:32:44,311 --> 00:32:45,776
Did she want you
to hang yourself with it?

802
00:32:45,778 --> 00:32:47,378
Look at that knot,
Jesus fucking Christ!

803
00:32:47,380 --> 00:32:49,281
I'm here about
Emily Nelson.

804
00:32:49,283 --> 00:32:50,948
What about Emily?
What happened?

805
00:32:50,950 --> 00:32:53,284
She asked me to pick up
her son four days ago

806
00:32:53,286 --> 00:32:54,619
because she went to Miami.

807
00:32:54,621 --> 00:32:56,454
She's still not back.
No texts, no calls,

808
00:32:56,456 --> 00:32:57,722
and no one in your office
seems to give a crap.

809
00:32:57,724 --> 00:32:58,726
Excuse my language.

810
00:33:00,194 --> 00:33:01,826
- Kiko.
- Hmm?

811
00:33:01,828 --> 00:33:03,528
Why did Emily
go to Miami?

812
00:33:03,530 --> 00:33:04,899
I didn't know she did.

813
00:33:06,832 --> 00:33:08,832
We in this office
have learned that

814
00:33:08,834 --> 00:33:10,534
when Emily elects
not to tell us something,

815
00:33:10,536 --> 00:33:11,936
it's best not to ask.

816
00:33:11,938 --> 00:33:13,405
Doesn't she work for you?

817
00:33:13,407 --> 00:33:15,706
Emily's job
is to stop the apocalypse

818
00:33:15,708 --> 00:33:17,576
without worrying
any of the designers.

819
00:33:17,578 --> 00:33:18,909
And she always
finds a way

820
00:33:18,911 --> 00:33:20,445
to look fabulous
when she does it.

821
00:33:20,447 --> 00:33:21,745
That's great!

822
00:33:21,747 --> 00:33:23,982
What do you suggest
that I do?

823
00:33:23,984 --> 00:33:26,417
Never wear a vintage Hermes
scarf with a Gap T-shirt.

824
00:33:26,419 --> 00:33:28,587
If you were truly Emily's
friend, you would know that.

825
00:33:28,589 --> 00:33:30,658
Excuse me,
I have a very busy day.

826
00:33:32,793 --> 00:33:34,292
Valerie, my office.

827
00:33:34,294 --> 00:33:35,295
Now!

828
00:33:50,444 --> 00:33:52,409
Hi.

829
00:33:52,411 --> 00:33:54,448
Sit, sit, sit!
Emily! I want answers.

830
00:33:55,482 --> 00:33:57,818
Steven,
you forgot the shirts.

831
00:34:08,528 --> 00:34:10,894
No, I can't
help you with that.

832
00:34:10,896 --> 00:34:12,329
Of course he's
freaking out.

833
00:34:12,331 --> 00:34:14,733
He needs someone
to manage this now.

834
00:34:14,735 --> 00:34:15,903
I don't know.

835
00:34:27,381 --> 00:34:28,583
Mother fudger.

836
00:35:00,012 --> 00:35:01,445
Well, if it isn't
Aunt Frieda's

837
00:35:01,447 --> 00:35:02,579
least favorite niece.

838
00:35:02,581 --> 00:35:03,914
What were you
doing up there?

839
00:35:03,916 --> 00:35:05,383
Corporate spying?

840
00:35:05,385 --> 00:35:06,821
Or just a common
garden shoplifter?

841
00:35:08,055 --> 00:35:09,921
Yeah, you gotta go
right at them.

842
00:35:09,923 --> 00:35:11,356
Especially
the powerful ones.

843
00:35:11,358 --> 00:35:12,959
Or they will fuck you
in the face.

844
00:35:14,061 --> 00:35:15,593
Listen, you bargain
basement Tom Ford,

845
00:35:15,595 --> 00:35:16,827
if you don't have
this Ken doll

846
00:35:16,829 --> 00:35:17,896
unhand me this second,

847
00:35:17,898 --> 00:35:19,863
I will tell the thousands of
moms that watch my vlog

848
00:35:19,865 --> 00:35:22,100
that Dennis Nylon is a bully
who victimizes women.

849
00:35:22,102 --> 00:35:23,834
And that they should stop
buying your tacky blouses

850
00:35:23,836 --> 00:35:25,070
made by Indonesian children.

851
00:35:25,072 --> 00:35:27,508
Because if you lose moms,
you lose business.

852
00:35:30,510 --> 00:35:31,642
Okay, number one,

853
00:35:31,644 --> 00:35:32,977
they are not
Indonesian children,

854
00:35:32,979 --> 00:35:34,678
they are Vietnamese
teenagers.

855
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:37,782
Number two,
Tom Ford wishes he were me.

856
00:35:37,784 --> 00:35:40,854
And number three,
if I'm tacky,

857
00:35:41,787 --> 00:35:42,856
okay?

858
00:35:43,456 --> 00:35:44,689
You're...

859
00:35:44,691 --> 00:35:45,860
This has been fun.

860
00:35:46,927 --> 00:35:48,963
Better pray
I don't have a bruise.

861
00:35:59,773 --> 00:36:01,575
No wonder she doesn't like
having her picture taken.

862
00:36:08,014 --> 00:36:09,780
<i>Look
at our little Stephanie.</i>

863
00:36:09,782 --> 00:36:11,883
Comforting
the worried husband.

864
00:36:11,885 --> 00:36:12,950
Oh, please.

865
00:36:12,952 --> 00:36:15,486
It's an arts
and crafts project.

866
00:36:15,488 --> 00:36:18,155
I've never seen her pass up
a chance to use a stapler.

867
00:36:18,157 --> 00:36:20,158
Emily's gonna hate
those flyers

868
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:21,892
when she gets back.

869
00:36:21,894 --> 00:36:24,364
She's not coming back.

870
00:36:25,465 --> 00:36:26,865
Don't you watch <i>Dateline?</i>

871
00:36:26,867 --> 00:36:29,336
If the case isn't solved
in the first 72 hours,

872
00:36:30,102 --> 00:36:32,005
they're always dead.

873
00:36:32,606 --> 00:36:33,738
Oh, yeah.

874
00:36:35,508 --> 00:36:36,673
Oh, perfect timing!

875
00:36:36,675 --> 00:36:37,742
Dinner's ready.

876
00:36:37,744 --> 00:36:38,843
The boys are upstairs.

877
00:36:38,845 --> 00:36:40,644
I'm just gonna have them
wash their hands

878
00:36:40,646 --> 00:36:41,748
and come down.

879
00:36:42,515 --> 00:36:43,782
Um...

880
00:36:43,784 --> 00:36:45,450
Are you okay?

881
00:36:45,452 --> 00:36:47,519
I've just never experienced
anything like this.

882
00:36:47,521 --> 00:36:49,954
Walking into
a fully set dinner table.

883
00:36:49,956 --> 00:36:53,425
Yeah,
this is weird.

884
00:36:53,427 --> 00:36:55,626
- I'm being...
- No, no, no! Not at all.

885
00:36:55,628 --> 00:36:57,428
I think anything
stable these days

886
00:36:57,430 --> 00:36:59,062
is like a gift
from heaven, right?

887
00:36:59,064 --> 00:37:00,698
I should tidy up
first, though.

888
00:37:05,137 --> 00:37:06,437
- Hey.
- Hello.

889
00:37:06,439 --> 00:37:07,439
- Mr. Townsend?
- Ah, yes.

890
00:37:07,441 --> 00:37:08,872
Detective Summerville.
We spoke on the phone.

891
00:37:08,874 --> 00:37:10,207
That's right. Um...

892
00:37:10,209 --> 00:37:12,443
Stephanie, can you help
the boys with their homework?

893
00:37:12,445 --> 00:37:14,111
Of course.

894
00:37:14,113 --> 00:37:15,979
- Come in. Sorry.
- Thank you.

895
00:37:15,981 --> 00:37:19,419
Just a pre-dinner snack.

896
00:37:20,820 --> 00:37:21,754
That's a cute nanny.

897
00:37:21,756 --> 00:37:24,756
No, no. That's one
of my wife's friends.

898
00:37:24,758 --> 00:37:26,127
She's been helping me out.

899
00:37:27,693 --> 00:37:30,093
Oh, shit. Can she come
help out around my house, too?

900
00:37:33,532 --> 00:37:34,832
The passenger manifest says

901
00:37:34,834 --> 00:37:36,834
she wasn't on
any flights to Miami.

902
00:37:36,836 --> 00:37:39,137
But she did rent
a white Kia from Budget.

903
00:37:39,139 --> 00:37:40,905
She paid in cash
for a two-day rental.

904
00:37:40,907 --> 00:37:42,874
Now, when people
pay in cash,

905
00:37:42,876 --> 00:37:44,608
it usually means one thing.

906
00:37:44,610 --> 00:37:46,711
What are you saying?
She's having an affair?

907
00:37:46,713 --> 00:37:48,146
I can't say that
with any confidence.

908
00:37:48,148 --> 00:37:49,881
Can you
not track the Kia?

909
00:37:49,883 --> 00:37:51,548
I have
toll booth reports coming in

910
00:37:51,550 --> 00:37:52,749
from across the country,

911
00:37:52,751 --> 00:37:54,619
assuming she's not
swapping out plates.

912
00:37:54,621 --> 00:37:56,120
I wanna get a description
of your wife to

913
00:37:56,122 --> 00:37:59,122
every precinct
in the tri-state area, okay?

914
00:37:59,124 --> 00:38:01,191
Did she have
any distinguishing features?

915
00:38:01,193 --> 00:38:03,495
Any birthmarks, tattoos?

916
00:38:03,497 --> 00:38:04,662
She's got a tattoo
on her left wrist.

917
00:38:04,664 --> 00:38:05,729
Oh, great.

918
00:38:05,731 --> 00:38:08,733
It's flames and a charity
symbol in the middle.

919
00:38:08,735 --> 00:38:10,702
Really?

920
00:38:10,704 --> 00:38:11,836
More judgment from you?

921
00:38:11,838 --> 00:38:13,004
Nope. No, no, no.

922
00:38:13,006 --> 00:38:14,271
But she did
things like that.

923
00:38:14,273 --> 00:38:16,573
Impulsive, crazy things.

924
00:38:16,575 --> 00:38:18,142
I'm gonna go call this in.

925
00:38:18,144 --> 00:38:19,680
Tell your wife's friend
I said goodbye.

926
00:38:22,749 --> 00:38:23,814
<i>You're a saint.</i>

927
00:38:23,816 --> 00:38:25,249
You don't have to do that.

928
00:38:25,251 --> 00:38:27,718
I'm not a saint. I just
like to keep my hands busy.

929
00:38:27,720 --> 00:38:29,687
Um... I should go.

930
00:38:29,689 --> 00:38:31,289
It's Flags of the World
day on Monday.

931
00:38:31,291 --> 00:38:32,993
I haven't even started
on South America.

932
00:38:35,996 --> 00:38:37,762
Sorry.

933
00:38:37,764 --> 00:38:40,631
No, I don't mean sorry.
I mean thank you.

934
00:38:40,633 --> 00:38:42,533
Thank you for being
such a good friend.

935
00:38:42,535 --> 00:38:43,568
Of course.

936
00:38:43,570 --> 00:38:46,037
I'm a problem-solver,
I just wish I could do more.

937
00:38:46,039 --> 00:38:47,475
You're doing plenty.

938
00:38:55,948 --> 00:38:57,615
So, that's where
we are today.

939
00:38:57,617 --> 00:38:58,883
And we are keeping
our heads up

940
00:38:58,885 --> 00:39:00,617
and not jumping
to any conclusions.

941
00:39:00,619 --> 00:39:01,986
We are soldiering on

942
00:39:01,988 --> 00:39:04,122
with cookies and origami.

943
00:39:04,124 --> 00:39:06,691
But for you moms
who want to help,

944
00:39:06,693 --> 00:39:08,859
we know that Emily
was driving a white Kia

945
00:39:08,861 --> 00:39:10,695
that she rented
from a Budget

946
00:39:10,697 --> 00:39:13,298
at La Guardia Airport
on the 24th.

947
00:39:13,300 --> 00:39:14,765
And I did a little digging,

948
00:39:14,767 --> 00:39:16,970
so, um,
the license plate is...

949
00:39:23,577 --> 00:39:24,642
<i>Dear Stephanie,</i>

950
00:39:24,644 --> 00:39:25,577
<i>I'm writing
from Standish, Michigan,</i>

951
00:39:25,579 --> 00:39:26,611
<i>with a possible
Emily sighting.</i>

952
00:39:26,613 --> 00:39:29,580
<i>I was driving down I-75
two days ago,</i>

953
00:39:29,582 --> 00:39:31,849
<i>when I saw a woman
gassing up a white Kia.</i>

954
00:39:31,851 --> 00:39:32,983
<i>She was really pretty,</i>

955
00:39:32,985 --> 00:39:34,318
<i>and I remember thinking
she didn't look like</i>

956
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:35,720
<i>she was from around here.</i>

957
00:39:35,722 --> 00:39:36,756
<i>I hope this helps.</i>

958
00:39:38,291 --> 00:39:40,591
So, um,
Summerville sent the info

959
00:39:40,593 --> 00:39:41,992
to the local authorities
in Michigan.

960
00:39:41,994 --> 00:39:44,762
Did she ever mention Michigan?
Did she have a friend there?

961
00:39:44,764 --> 00:39:47,765
As far as I knew, she didn't
have any real friends.

962
00:39:47,767 --> 00:39:49,133
- Not before you.
- Oh.

963
00:39:49,135 --> 00:39:50,300
How is that possible?

964
00:39:54,807 --> 00:39:56,677
Hello. Please
tell me you found her.

965
00:39:57,309 --> 00:39:58,545
A lake?

966
00:39:59,813 --> 00:40:01,282
Well, I don't know.

967
00:40:02,849 --> 00:40:04,682
Okay, I'm heading
there now.

968
00:40:04,684 --> 00:40:06,950
They found the rental
car in Michigan.

969
00:40:06,952 --> 00:40:07,818
Look, I'm gonna have to go

970
00:40:07,820 --> 00:40:09,921
because otherwise
I'm going to go crazy.

971
00:40:09,923 --> 00:40:11,659
- Can you do me a favor?
- Yes, it's done. Go.

972
00:40:13,226 --> 00:40:15,193
<i>Hi, moms. Stephanie here.</i>

973
00:40:15,195 --> 00:40:18,296
I can see we have
a flood of new viewers today.

974
00:40:18,298 --> 00:40:21,231
And if you're new
to the vlog, I'm sorry.

975
00:40:21,233 --> 00:40:23,367
This probably isn't
the best entry to start with.

976
00:40:23,369 --> 00:40:26,403
<i>For those of you who have been
following my vlog this week,</i>

977
00:40:26,405 --> 00:40:29,273
<i>you know that my best friend,
Emily, went missing.</i>

978
00:40:29,275 --> 00:40:33,311
<i>So many of you wrote in with
your helpful tips and ideas.</i>

979
00:40:33,313 --> 00:40:37,215
<i>I wanna give a special thanks
to Leanne Lippens</i>

980
00:40:37,217 --> 00:40:40,653
<i>whose helpful tip made
a major break in the case.</i>

981
00:40:42,389 --> 00:40:44,258
<i>I have some somber news.</i>

982
00:40:46,892 --> 00:40:48,361
<i>Emily was found.</i>

983
00:40:51,898 --> 00:40:53,666
<i>Not alive, I'm afraid.</i>

984
00:40:55,401 --> 00:40:57,804
<i>My friend, Emily Nelson,</i>

985
00:40:59,405 --> 00:41:00,608
<i>is dead.</i>

986
00:41:15,287 --> 00:41:17,689
<i>Our Father,
we look to you again,</i>

987
00:41:17,691 --> 00:41:19,890
<i>facing this moment
of our need.</i>

988
00:41:19,892 --> 00:41:23,160
<i>In our sorrow,
grief and loneliness</i>

989
00:41:23,162 --> 00:41:25,195
draw us up to yourself

990
00:41:25,197 --> 00:41:28,265
that we may know the comfort
of the everlasting arms.

991
00:41:28,267 --> 00:41:30,233
Especially support
and comfort those

992
00:41:30,235 --> 00:41:33,403
who have been closest
to our departed sister.

993
00:41:33,405 --> 00:41:35,106
Sustain them
in the blessed assurance

994
00:41:35,108 --> 00:41:36,841
that death is conquered,

995
00:41:36,843 --> 00:41:38,175
the new life is begun.

996
00:41:38,177 --> 00:41:40,111
To be absent from the body

997
00:41:40,113 --> 00:41:41,912
is to be present
with the Lord.

998
00:41:41,914 --> 00:41:43,881
May we be assured
in the hope

999
00:41:43,883 --> 00:41:45,249
that we shall
walk together again

1000
00:41:45,251 --> 00:41:47,350
in your blessed presence.

1001
00:41:47,352 --> 00:41:49,720
Help us to number our days

1002
00:41:49,722 --> 00:41:52,058
that we may apply
our hearts unto wisdom.

1003
00:41:52,959 --> 00:41:54,191
In the name of the Father,

1004
00:41:54,193 --> 00:41:55,829
and of the Son,
and of the Holy Spirit.

1005
00:41:56,396 --> 00:41:57,398
Amen.

1006
00:42:04,938 --> 00:42:06,003
Hi.

1007
00:42:06,005 --> 00:42:07,006
Oh, hi.

1008
00:42:08,374 --> 00:42:10,108
Are those, um...

1009
00:42:10,110 --> 00:42:11,975
Oh, yeah,
yeah, they are.

1010
00:42:11,977 --> 00:42:14,745
They're from your
last-minute brownie entry.

1011
00:42:14,747 --> 00:42:17,080
I can't believe
you watch my vlog.

1012
00:42:17,082 --> 00:42:18,448
To be honest,

1013
00:42:18,450 --> 00:42:19,883
when we first
started watching it,

1014
00:42:19,885 --> 00:42:21,318
we were just making
fun of you.

1015
00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:23,019
But, um...

1016
00:42:23,021 --> 00:42:25,222
But then, you had some
really helpful hints in there.

1017
00:42:25,224 --> 00:42:27,225
Especially when Lulu
got that rash,

1018
00:42:27,227 --> 00:42:29,193
apple cider vinegar
was great.

1019
00:42:29,195 --> 00:42:30,794
Oh, well, great! That's...

1020
00:42:30,796 --> 00:42:31,798
Yeah.

1021
00:42:34,032 --> 00:42:35,133
You're a real saint

1022
00:42:35,135 --> 00:42:36,399
to help her family out
like this.

1023
00:42:36,401 --> 00:42:37,667
I'm not a saint.

1024
00:42:37,669 --> 00:42:40,370
Emily was my friend, and she'd
do the same for me, so...

1025
00:42:40,372 --> 00:42:42,006
If you or Sean need me

1026
00:42:42,008 --> 00:42:44,876
to watch Miles or Nicky
anytime, it's nothing.

1027
00:42:44,878 --> 00:42:47,311
That's so sweet, Sona.
Thank you.

1028
00:42:47,313 --> 00:42:50,381
It's the least she could do,
she didn't even bake anything.

1029
00:42:50,383 --> 00:42:51,718
- Yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

1030
00:42:52,452 --> 00:42:53,785
Nicky,

1031
00:42:53,787 --> 00:42:55,218
you don't need to worry.

1032
00:42:55,220 --> 00:42:56,820
Your mom's in heaven now.

1033
00:42:56,822 --> 00:42:59,423
No, she's not! Shut up!

1034
00:42:59,425 --> 00:43:00,557
- She's in the ground!
- Ow! Stop it!

1035
00:43:00,559 --> 00:43:01,925
She's never coming back!

1036
00:43:01,927 --> 00:43:03,294
Ow! You're hurting me!

1037
00:43:03,296 --> 00:43:05,028
- I hate you!
- Ow! Stop it!

1038
00:43:05,030 --> 00:43:07,266
Nicky, get off him!

1039
00:43:09,035 --> 00:43:10,334
Nicky, what're you doing?
Get off him!

1040
00:43:10,336 --> 00:43:12,035
What the hell are you doing?

1041
00:43:12,037 --> 00:43:13,004
Calm down, stop that.

1042
00:43:13,006 --> 00:43:15,372
She made this happen!
She made my mom die!

1043
00:43:15,374 --> 00:43:16,841
That's crazy
and you know that.

1044
00:43:16,843 --> 00:43:18,142
She's trying to be
my new mom!

1045
00:43:18,144 --> 00:43:19,242
Sweetie, I'm not trying
to be your mom.

1046
00:43:19,244 --> 00:43:20,410
I want my mom!

1047
00:43:20,412 --> 00:43:21,479
I know you do, baby.
I know you do.

1048
00:43:21,481 --> 00:43:22,879
- But calm down.
- Mom was right!

1049
00:43:22,881 --> 00:43:25,149
You are a loser!

1050
00:43:25,852 --> 00:43:26,917
Is that what she told you,

1051
00:43:26,919 --> 00:43:28,151
drunk at 2:00
in the afternoon?

1052
00:43:28,153 --> 00:43:30,287
- I am trying my best!
- Sean!

1053
00:43:30,289 --> 00:43:31,888
He's just a little boy.
Jesus!

1054
00:43:31,890 --> 00:43:33,390
Nicky, I'm sorry.

1055
00:43:33,392 --> 00:43:35,059
- What do I do?
- Okay.

1056
00:43:35,061 --> 00:43:36,227
What do I do?

1057
00:43:36,229 --> 00:43:37,562
We're all gonna take a deep,
centering breath now.

1058
00:43:37,564 --> 00:43:39,095
Ready?

1059
00:43:39,097 --> 00:43:40,497
We're gonna focus on
one thing at a time.

1060
00:43:40,499 --> 00:43:42,499
I'm gonna stay
and talk to Nicky.

1061
00:43:42,501 --> 00:43:44,100
So I need you
to take Miles inside,

1062
00:43:44,102 --> 00:43:45,468
put some ice on his nose.

1063
00:43:45,470 --> 00:43:47,273
'Cause you got
a good little shiner coming.

1064
00:43:48,240 --> 00:43:49,976
- It's okay.
- Okay.

1065
00:43:50,343 --> 00:43:51,345
It's okay.

1066
00:43:54,146 --> 00:43:55,815
I don't wanna talk to you.

1067
00:43:58,952 --> 00:44:00,050
You're not my
favorite dinner date

1068
00:44:00,052 --> 00:44:02,186
right now either, buster.

1069
00:44:02,188 --> 00:44:03,387
But you should know
that everything

1070
00:44:03,389 --> 00:44:05,388
you're feeling right now
is normal.

1071
00:44:05,390 --> 00:44:07,591
You can act out all you want.
That's fine.

1072
00:44:07,593 --> 00:44:09,392
This doesn't change
what I know.

1073
00:44:09,394 --> 00:44:10,928
What do you know?

1074
00:44:10,930 --> 00:44:12,065
That you're a good kid.

1075
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:16,869
So let's just sit here
and not talk.

1076
00:44:18,872 --> 00:44:20,972
Let's just sit here

1077
00:44:20,974 --> 00:44:23,177
and feel lousy
and watch the grass grow.

1078
00:44:57,309 --> 00:44:58,311
Hey.

1079
00:44:59,945 --> 00:45:03,113
Hey, come on. Don't be
hard on yourself, yeah?

1080
00:45:03,115 --> 00:45:05,416
It's the kind of stuff
nobody gets right.

1081
00:45:05,418 --> 00:45:07,417
You do. You always do.

1082
00:45:07,419 --> 00:45:09,188
No, no, come on.

1083
00:45:32,345 --> 00:45:34,047
Um... I don't know if...

1084
00:45:35,014 --> 00:45:36,079
Yeah.

1085
00:45:36,081 --> 00:45:37,416
- Yeah, we shouldn't.
- Yeah.

1086
00:45:38,617 --> 00:45:40,251
Yeah.

1087
00:45:43,088 --> 00:45:44,090
Fuck.

1088
00:48:14,573 --> 00:48:17,173
Are you serious?

1089
00:48:27,720 --> 00:48:30,553
Hey, Ms. Smothers!

1090
00:48:30,555 --> 00:48:33,092
- Can I talk to you?
- Yeah. Um...

1091
00:48:34,459 --> 00:48:35,461
I'm gonna come right down.

1092
00:48:38,363 --> 00:48:39,532
Shit!

1093
00:48:40,832 --> 00:48:43,566
- Hi! Hi!
- Hey! Hey!

1094
00:48:43,568 --> 00:48:46,736
Uh, I just left something
here, so I was just...

1095
00:48:46,738 --> 00:48:48,138
I had a key

1096
00:48:48,140 --> 00:48:49,840
because earlier,
Sean gave me a key...

1097
00:48:49,842 --> 00:48:51,408
You're not under arrest,
Miss Smothers.

1098
00:48:51,410 --> 00:48:52,412
- Oh!
- FYI.

1099
00:48:53,345 --> 00:48:54,745
I should hope not.

1100
00:48:54,747 --> 00:48:57,314
- All right. No, no.
- No.

1101
00:48:57,316 --> 00:48:59,352
- You're very funny.
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

1102
00:48:59,619 --> 00:49:00,754
Um...

1103
00:49:01,553 --> 00:49:02,553
Sean's not here right now.

1104
00:49:02,555 --> 00:49:05,388
You know, I was actually
hoping to speak to you.

1105
00:49:05,390 --> 00:49:07,390
- Oh!
- Yeah, I went by your house.

1106
00:49:07,392 --> 00:49:08,791
Then I went by the school,

1107
00:49:08,793 --> 00:49:10,794
then one of the moms thought
you might be here.

1108
00:49:10,796 --> 00:49:12,832
Did they? Okay.
Well, that's...

1109
00:49:13,599 --> 00:49:14,832
Was it Stacy?

1110
00:49:14,834 --> 00:49:16,767
Can I come in?

1111
00:49:16,769 --> 00:49:18,635
- Of course, I would love that!
- Thank you.

1112
00:49:20,439 --> 00:49:22,342
You said that Emily's
your best friend.

1113
00:49:23,175 --> 00:49:25,475
Yes. Yes, we are.

1114
00:49:25,477 --> 00:49:27,644
- Was she depressed?
- No.

1115
00:49:27,646 --> 00:49:29,280
No, she had everything.

1116
00:49:29,282 --> 00:49:30,780
She had the house
and the job...

1117
00:49:30,782 --> 00:49:31,851
And the husband.

1118
00:49:32,918 --> 00:49:34,417
I was getting there, yeah.

1119
00:49:34,419 --> 00:49:36,553
The neighbors said
they fought a lot.

1120
00:49:36,555 --> 00:49:39,189
Well, they had issues. Um...

1121
00:49:39,191 --> 00:49:41,291
But they loved
each other intensely.

1122
00:49:41,293 --> 00:49:42,496
Oh, what issues
did they have?

1123
00:49:43,195 --> 00:49:44,260
The normal issues.

1124
00:49:44,262 --> 00:49:45,162
They were stressed
about money.

1125
00:49:45,164 --> 00:49:47,898
And I think Emily
wanted to slow down

1126
00:49:47,900 --> 00:49:49,533
and smell the roses.

1127
00:49:49,535 --> 00:49:51,401
She slowed down all right.

1128
00:49:51,403 --> 00:49:54,306
I got the autopsy report
right here.

1129
00:49:55,307 --> 00:49:56,407
Let's see here.

1130
00:49:56,409 --> 00:49:59,443
"Severe liver damage
suggesting heavy alcohol use.

1131
00:49:59,445 --> 00:50:03,280
"Track marks along her arms
and between her toes."

1132
00:50:03,282 --> 00:50:04,885
Were you aware
of the heroin use?

1133
00:50:08,253 --> 00:50:09,722
No, that's, uh...

1134
00:50:11,624 --> 00:50:13,256
I'm sorry, I really have

1135
00:50:13,258 --> 00:50:14,858
trouble believing that.

1136
00:50:14,860 --> 00:50:17,260
She liked a very
strong martini, but...

1137
00:50:17,262 --> 00:50:21,932
I don't know how she could've
kept that a secret from me,

1138
00:50:21,934 --> 00:50:24,434
and especially
from her husband, Sean.

1139
00:50:24,436 --> 00:50:26,437
Yeah, you seem to know
Sean pretty well.

1140
00:50:26,439 --> 00:50:28,872
I... We've gotten
to know each other

1141
00:50:28,874 --> 00:50:31,908
over the last few weeks,
just as friends.

1142
00:50:31,910 --> 00:50:32,912
Uh-huh.

1143
00:50:34,412 --> 00:50:35,678
I'm
guessing you've never dealt

1144
00:50:35,680 --> 00:50:37,349
with law enforcement before.

1145
00:50:44,789 --> 00:50:46,492
- Not really, no.
- Mmm.

1146
00:50:49,394 --> 00:50:50,461
That's a really nice dress.

1147
00:50:50,463 --> 00:50:52,262
Oh, thank you.

1148
00:50:52,264 --> 00:50:53,497
Doesn't seem to be
your style, though.

1149
00:50:53,499 --> 00:50:56,367
Oh, I'm very versatile,
Detective,

1150
00:50:56,369 --> 00:50:57,800
I think you'll find.

1151
00:50:57,802 --> 00:51:01,571
I'm really just trying
to help Sean and Nicky

1152
00:51:01,573 --> 00:51:02,673
in their time of grief.

1153
00:51:02,675 --> 00:51:03,943
Oh, how is Sean's grief?

1154
00:51:05,410 --> 00:51:06,943
He's holding up very well.

1155
00:51:06,945 --> 00:51:09,379
As well as can be expected.

1156
00:51:09,381 --> 00:51:11,015
Uh-huh.

1157
00:51:11,017 --> 00:51:13,017
Is that everything, or...

1158
00:51:13,019 --> 00:51:15,488
Let me ask you something.

1159
00:51:18,590 --> 00:51:19,890
Were you aware

1160
00:51:19,892 --> 00:51:22,459
that he took out
an extra $4 million

1161
00:51:22,461 --> 00:51:23,794
life insurance policy

1162
00:51:23,796 --> 00:51:25,564
on Emily
before she disappeared?

1163
00:51:27,599 --> 00:51:30,736
I was not aware of that, no.

1164
00:51:31,470 --> 00:51:32,906
Why? How would I?

1165
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:37,408
Okay, all right.

1166
00:51:37,410 --> 00:51:39,713
Yeah, I don't...

1167
00:51:40,378 --> 00:51:42,448
I'm sorry. What...

1168
00:51:44,416 --> 00:51:45,481
What are you...

1169
00:51:45,483 --> 00:51:46,816
Are you saying
he had her rubbed out?

1170
00:51:46,818 --> 00:51:48,318
He hired a hitman?

1171
00:51:51,523 --> 00:51:53,856
I didn't say anything
about him hiring a hitman.

1172
00:51:53,858 --> 00:51:54,957
You just did.

1173
00:51:54,959 --> 00:51:56,760
Okay.

1174
00:51:56,762 --> 00:51:58,394
I can see that
you're enjoying yourself,

1175
00:51:58,396 --> 00:51:59,530
Detective Summerville.

1176
00:51:59,532 --> 00:52:01,064
But if you wanna
grill someone, you should

1177
00:52:01,066 --> 00:52:03,600
really speak to Emily's
boss, Dennis Nylon.

1178
00:52:03,602 --> 00:52:05,401
He could not be
more suspicious.

1179
00:52:05,403 --> 00:52:07,671
That's super interesting
because he contacted us.

1180
00:52:07,673 --> 00:52:10,774
And he said he thought you knew
more than you were letting on.

1181
00:52:10,776 --> 00:52:13,109
Well, he sucks.

1182
00:52:13,111 --> 00:52:15,611
So...

1183
00:52:15,613 --> 00:52:17,914
As long as you're honest
with me, Ms. Smothers,

1184
00:52:17,916 --> 00:52:19,082
I swear to you,

1185
00:52:19,084 --> 00:52:21,017
you have nothing
to worry about. Okay?

1186
00:52:21,019 --> 00:52:24,787
I'm just following
breadcrumbs wherever they lead.

1187
00:52:24,789 --> 00:52:26,523
Okay, you know what?
I'm done for now.

1188
00:52:26,525 --> 00:52:28,559
Thanks for your time.

1189
00:52:28,561 --> 00:52:31,128
Your theory doesn't
hold water, you know,

1190
00:52:31,130 --> 00:52:32,528
because it doesn't explain

1191
00:52:32,530 --> 00:52:34,832
the fake plane ticket
or the rental car.

1192
00:52:34,834 --> 00:52:37,033
And why would someone
shoot her full of heroin

1193
00:52:37,035 --> 00:52:38,301
at a summer camp in Michigan?

1194
00:52:38,303 --> 00:52:40,372
There's plenty of good heroin
right here in Connecticut!

1195
00:52:40,840 --> 00:52:42,405
I'm told.

1196
00:52:42,407 --> 00:52:45,008
Great, good. Okay, so
we have a lot to talk about.

1197
00:52:45,010 --> 00:52:46,676
All right, then.
Enjoy the new house.

1198
00:52:46,678 --> 00:52:49,379
The worst breadcrumbs I've
ever heard of, you know.

1199
00:52:49,381 --> 00:52:50,546
Couldn't fill
a Caesar salad

1200
00:52:50,548 --> 00:52:51,851
with those breadcrumbs!

1201
00:53:44,970 --> 00:53:48,604
Why is this Caesarean
salad so crunchy?

1202
00:53:48,606 --> 00:53:51,378
It's Caesar salad, baby,
and it's delicious.

1203
00:53:51,876 --> 00:53:53,012
What's in it?

1204
00:53:54,512 --> 00:53:55,514
Breadcrumbs.

1205
00:53:55,780 --> 00:53:56,847
Oh.

1206
00:53:56,849 --> 00:53:58,051
How was your day at work?

1207
00:53:59,017 --> 00:54:00,084
Grim.

1208
00:54:00,086 --> 00:54:01,251
Spent most of the day
explaining the difference

1209
00:54:01,253 --> 00:54:05,722
between "your" possessive
and "you're" apostrophe R-E

1210
00:54:05,724 --> 00:54:08,624
to college juniors.

1211
00:54:08,626 --> 00:54:10,596
I can see how that might
drive a man over the edge.

1212
00:54:11,764 --> 00:54:13,229
I know, right?

1213
00:54:13,231 --> 00:54:14,664
What about you boys?

1214
00:54:14,666 --> 00:54:16,867
What'd you guys get up to
today at school?

1215
00:54:16,869 --> 00:54:18,071
I saw my mom.

1216
00:54:22,140 --> 00:54:23,740
I understand, Nicky,
that sometimes

1217
00:54:23,742 --> 00:54:25,678
we think we see people
that we miss

1218
00:54:26,611 --> 00:54:27,977
even if they're gone.

1219
00:54:27,979 --> 00:54:29,613
No, I saw her.

1220
00:54:29,615 --> 00:54:30,814
She was right outside
the fence

1221
00:54:30,816 --> 00:54:32,651
by the kickball yard
at recess.

1222
00:54:34,253 --> 00:54:36,687
Lots of people
look like someone else.

1223
00:54:36,689 --> 00:54:37,957
Nobody looks like Mom!

1224
00:54:39,492 --> 00:54:40,760
She told me
to say hi to Stephanie.

1225
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:42,258
Nicky,

1226
00:54:42,260 --> 00:54:43,861
this is unhealthy.

1227
00:54:43,863 --> 00:54:45,865
Miles saw her, too.
Right, Miles?

1228
00:54:47,066 --> 00:54:48,698
I think I did.

1229
00:54:48,700 --> 00:54:49,832
But I don't know.

1230
00:54:49,834 --> 00:54:51,234
I was playing tetherball.

1231
00:54:51,236 --> 00:54:53,070
Did you two hatch this up?

1232
00:54:53,072 --> 00:54:55,271
Is this a game, like when you
smash everything with trucks?

1233
00:54:55,273 --> 00:54:56,874
Because you know
what we say about lying.

1234
00:54:56,876 --> 00:54:59,510
I'm not lying!
I saw her! Fuck you!

1235
00:54:59,512 --> 00:55:00,910
Hey, Nicky!

1236
00:55:00,912 --> 00:55:01,914
Oopsy!

1237
00:55:03,883 --> 00:55:05,518
I'm sorry.

1238
00:55:14,559 --> 00:55:16,760
Don't I get a kiss
good night?

1239
00:55:16,762 --> 00:55:18,695
Of course you do, sweetie.

1240
00:55:18,697 --> 00:55:20,631
Actually, you owe
the oopsy jar a quarter

1241
00:55:20,633 --> 00:55:22,068
for earlier, but I...

1242
00:55:28,874 --> 00:55:29,876
Good night, sweetie.

1243
00:55:39,318 --> 00:55:40,520
Hey.

1244
00:55:41,753 --> 00:55:43,489
We should get naked.

1245
00:55:45,724 --> 00:55:46,959
What is it?

1246
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:49,091
What's wrong?

1247
00:55:49,093 --> 00:55:52,629
I smell her, Sean.
I smell her perfume.

1248
00:55:52,631 --> 00:55:54,965
It's all over Nicky
like a ghost.

1249
00:55:54,967 --> 00:55:56,332
He probably got
to her perfume bottle

1250
00:55:56,334 --> 00:55:58,035
in the medicine cabinet.

1251
00:55:58,037 --> 00:55:59,870
He misses her.

1252
00:55:59,872 --> 00:56:01,171
Okay? It's just you
being paranoid.

1253
00:56:01,173 --> 00:56:03,243
Is it? Because
I found this, too.

1254
00:56:04,776 --> 00:56:06,209
What's this?

1255
00:56:06,211 --> 00:56:07,711
It's the friendship
bracelet I made her.

1256
00:56:07,713 --> 00:56:09,282
I'm afraid to say
she would not have kept this.

1257
00:56:10,081 --> 00:56:12,716
She hated stuff like this.

1258
00:56:12,718 --> 00:56:13,883
She probably
gave it to him

1259
00:56:13,885 --> 00:56:15,318
right after
you gave it to her.

1260
00:56:15,320 --> 00:56:17,320
Unless he's
telling the truth.

1261
00:56:17,322 --> 00:56:19,758
You saw her
with your own eyes.

1262
00:56:20,358 --> 00:56:21,892
In her coffin.

1263
00:56:21,894 --> 00:56:23,292
There was something off.

1264
00:56:23,294 --> 00:56:25,361
They found her
at the bottom of a lake!

1265
00:56:25,363 --> 00:56:26,896
You saw her tattoo,

1266
00:56:26,898 --> 00:56:29,101
and you saw that ring
that she stole from my mother.

1267
00:56:30,903 --> 00:56:33,303
She said your mother wanted
her to have that ring.

1268
00:56:33,305 --> 00:56:34,738
She said your
mother insisted.

1269
00:56:34,740 --> 00:56:37,106
That's what she told you?

1270
00:56:37,108 --> 00:56:39,276
My father gave that ring
to my mother.

1271
00:56:39,278 --> 00:56:40,644
It was like
the only bit of jewelry

1272
00:56:40,646 --> 00:56:41,912
that she ever owned.

1273
00:56:41,914 --> 00:56:43,847
I took Emily to London
to meet my mother

1274
00:56:43,849 --> 00:56:45,082
after we eloped.

1275
00:56:45,084 --> 00:56:47,751
It went missing
that weekend.

1276
00:56:47,753 --> 00:56:50,820
My mother was frantic.
We searched everywhere.

1277
00:56:50,822 --> 00:56:52,257
Nothing. We didn't
find a single thing.

1278
00:56:53,726 --> 00:56:55,658
<i>My mother was devastated.</i>

1279
00:56:55,660 --> 00:56:57,130
<i>So we took a flight
back to New York.</i>

1280
00:56:58,363 --> 00:56:59,865
Guess what I found.

1281
00:57:00,698 --> 00:57:02,101
What did you find?

1282
00:57:03,035 --> 00:57:04,334
No!

1283
00:57:04,336 --> 00:57:06,068
No way!

1284
00:57:06,070 --> 00:57:08,671
My little Sherlock Holmes.

1285
00:57:08,673 --> 00:57:10,407
Mum is gonna be
so relieved.

1286
00:57:10,409 --> 00:57:12,309
Oh, come on, baby.

1287
00:57:12,311 --> 00:57:15,048
Mum will take it to the grave.
What a waste.

1288
00:57:15,814 --> 00:57:17,046
So pretty.

1289
00:57:17,048 --> 00:57:18,015
Excuse me.

1290
00:57:18,017 --> 00:57:20,850
Not amusing, my darling,
not in the slightest.

1291
00:57:20,852 --> 00:57:23,653
I'm not joking
in the slightest,

1292
00:57:23,655 --> 00:57:25,421
my darling.

1293
00:57:25,423 --> 00:57:26,423
I took it.

1294
00:57:26,425 --> 00:57:28,791
I don't have any intention
of giving it back.

1295
00:57:28,793 --> 00:57:29,992
Of course
we're gonna give it back.

1296
00:57:29,994 --> 00:57:31,695
No.

1297
00:57:31,697 --> 00:57:33,030
We'll tell her that
it just slipped

1298
00:57:33,032 --> 00:57:34,296
into your purse
by accident,

1299
00:57:34,298 --> 00:57:36,832
and we've only
found it now.

1300
00:57:36,834 --> 00:57:38,769
But if you tell her
that I found it,

1301
00:57:38,771 --> 00:57:40,269
then I have to tell her
that I stole it.

1302
00:57:40,271 --> 00:57:42,673
And what do you think
will be worse for her?

1303
00:57:42,675 --> 00:57:44,841
Thinking that
she lost her ring,

1304
00:57:44,843 --> 00:57:47,678
or thinking that her son
married a thief?

1305
00:57:47,680 --> 00:57:49,178
- Baby...
- Hey.

1306
00:57:49,180 --> 00:57:51,316
You choose, her or me?

1307
00:57:54,452 --> 00:57:56,352
Meet me in the bathroom
in 20 seconds.

1308
00:57:56,354 --> 00:57:57,389
Knock twice.

1309
00:58:24,048 --> 00:58:27,416
<i>Nine months later,
Nicky was born.</i>

1310
00:58:27,418 --> 00:58:29,486
<i>How could you stay with her?</i>

1311
00:58:29,488 --> 00:58:31,754
I was spellbound.

1312
00:58:31,756 --> 00:58:32,856
She was the only woman

1313
00:58:32,858 --> 00:58:34,291
I could never
figure out fully.

1314
00:58:34,293 --> 00:58:36,425
As a young, arrogant
writer, I could never

1315
00:58:36,427 --> 00:58:38,461
live up to what
she expected of me.

1316
00:58:38,463 --> 00:58:40,262
I was always
looking over my shoulder.

1317
00:58:40,264 --> 00:58:41,700
I could hardly sleep.

1318
00:58:43,102 --> 00:58:44,934
But with you,
it's different.

1319
00:58:44,936 --> 00:58:46,369
I sleep like a log.

1320
00:58:46,371 --> 00:58:48,104
That's what every woman
wants to hear.

1321
00:58:48,106 --> 00:58:49,171
You know what I mean.

1322
00:58:49,173 --> 00:58:50,942
You understand me,
you see me.

1323
00:58:51,843 --> 00:58:53,809
You've rebuilt me,
Stephanie.

1324
00:58:53,811 --> 00:58:55,247
I've even started
writing again.

1325
00:58:56,081 --> 00:58:58,080
First couple of chapters,

1326
00:58:58,082 --> 00:58:59,285
but it's a start.

1327
00:59:01,119 --> 00:59:02,188
Oh.

1328
00:59:03,488 --> 00:59:05,254
That's wonderful.

1329
00:59:05,256 --> 00:59:07,157
You took a broken man,

1330
00:59:07,159 --> 00:59:09,492
and you pieced him
back together again.

1331
00:59:09,494 --> 00:59:11,963
You're unlike any other
woman I've ever met.

1332
00:59:13,898 --> 00:59:14,933
Move in with me.

1333
00:59:16,300 --> 00:59:17,267
Sean.

1334
00:59:17,269 --> 00:59:20,003
No, it's too soon.
What will people think?

1335
00:59:20,005 --> 00:59:21,303
They're already
thinking it.

1336
00:59:21,305 --> 00:59:23,907
And I'm tired of lying.
I'm tired of pretending.

1337
00:59:23,909 --> 00:59:25,044
I want to be this man.

1338
00:59:25,778 --> 00:59:27,113
The man I am with you.

1339
00:59:28,347 --> 00:59:30,280
I don't do threesomes.

1340
00:59:30,282 --> 00:59:31,414
I want to say that.

1341
00:59:31,416 --> 00:59:32,883
I'll just get that
out in the open.

1342
00:59:32,885 --> 00:59:34,517
What are you talking about?

1343
00:59:34,519 --> 00:59:36,186
Your TA?

1344
00:59:36,188 --> 00:59:39,789
Emily told me
about your little moment.

1345
00:59:39,791 --> 00:59:41,091
- That's what she told you?
- Yes.

1346
00:59:41,093 --> 00:59:42,158
Stephanie, listen.

1347
00:59:42,160 --> 00:59:44,361
Emily was
a pathological liar.

1348
00:59:44,363 --> 00:59:46,365
That never happened, okay?

1349
00:59:47,499 --> 00:59:49,399
Why did you take out
a $4 million

1350
00:59:49,401 --> 00:59:51,200
insurance policy on her?

1351
00:59:51,202 --> 00:59:53,836
My gosh. Those cops really did
a number on you, didn't they?

1352
00:59:53,838 --> 00:59:55,171
I'm being serious.

1353
00:59:55,173 --> 00:59:57,006
It was because of you.

1354
00:59:57,008 --> 00:59:58,475
When Emily found out
that you had been

1355
00:59:58,477 --> 01:00:01,278
living off your husband's
insurance money,

1356
01:00:01,280 --> 01:00:03,914
she thought she and I
needed to get policies

1357
01:00:03,916 --> 01:00:05,381
out for Nicky's sake.

1358
01:00:05,383 --> 01:00:07,352
It's probably the most
responsible thing we ever did.

1359
01:00:08,253 --> 01:00:09,455
Thanks to you.

1360
01:00:11,856 --> 01:00:13,256
Move in with me.

1361
01:00:13,258 --> 01:00:15,858
We can start a whole new,
wonderful life together.

1362
01:00:15,860 --> 01:00:17,429
Just you, me and the boys.

1363
01:00:19,030 --> 01:00:21,333
Please, say yes.

1364
01:00:24,102 --> 01:00:26,506
I love you,
Stephanie Smothers.

1365
01:00:28,006 --> 01:00:30,240
I love you, too.

1366
01:01:48,153 --> 01:01:51,021
<i>Hi, moms.
This is Stephanie here.</i>

1367
01:01:51,023 --> 01:01:52,988
<i>I'm gonna do something
a little different today.</i>

1368
01:01:52,990 --> 01:01:55,425
<i>I normally avoid any talk
of religion on the vlog.</i>

1369
01:01:55,427 --> 01:01:58,461
<i>I don't wanna offend
any non-denominational moms.</i>

1370
01:01:58,463 --> 01:02:01,234
<i>But I do think that we live on
after we die, so...</i>

1371
01:02:03,434 --> 01:02:04,633
<i>Emily,</i>

1372
01:02:04,635 --> 01:02:07,236
<i>if you are out there,</i>

1373
01:02:07,238 --> 01:02:09,439
<i>and you can hear me
right now,</i>

1374
01:02:09,441 --> 01:02:11,608
<i>no one could ever replace you.</i>

1375
01:02:11,610 --> 01:02:14,644
<i>And you'll always be
Nicky's mom.</i>

1376
01:02:14,646 --> 01:02:17,079
<i>I can't take your place.</i>

1377
01:02:17,081 --> 01:02:21,251
<i>I can just try to love
the people that you love</i>

1378
01:02:21,253 --> 01:02:23,653
<i>and try to make
their lives better.</i>

1379
01:02:23,655 --> 01:02:25,390
<i>I think that's what
you would want.</i>

1380
01:02:30,329 --> 01:02:33,095
Okay, guys, it's getting
too rough back there.

1381
01:02:33,097 --> 01:02:34,965
I murdered you!

1382
01:02:34,967 --> 01:02:37,399
Not me.
I came back to life.

1383
01:02:37,401 --> 01:02:39,068
Like your mom!

1384
01:02:39,070 --> 01:02:40,704
Okay, the dolls
are going in your backpacks

1385
01:02:40,706 --> 01:02:42,204
or they're going
in the trash, I mean it.

1386
01:02:42,206 --> 01:02:45,575
Mom, they're
not dolls! God!

1387
01:02:45,577 --> 01:02:48,979
Stephanie, my mom told me
to give you this.

1388
01:02:48,981 --> 01:02:50,981
Mom!

1389
01:02:58,122 --> 01:02:59,691
Damn! Are you
trying to kill us?

1390
01:03:19,510 --> 01:03:20,609
Hello?

1391
01:03:20,611 --> 01:03:21,577
<i>Hi, I'm calling from</i>

1392
01:03:21,579 --> 01:03:23,278
<i>United Timeshare
International.</i>

1393
01:03:23,280 --> 01:03:24,580
Yep, I...

1394
01:03:24,582 --> 01:03:26,416
<i>We'd like to offer you
a free trip to the Bahamas.</i>

1395
01:03:26,418 --> 01:03:28,017
<i>All you have to do
is come down to one of...</i>

1396
01:03:28,019 --> 01:03:30,086
I don't want that,
have a nice day.

1397
01:03:30,088 --> 01:03:31,390
I don't want that,
I don't care.

1398
01:03:32,124 --> 01:03:33,959
Oh, my God!

1399
01:03:37,729 --> 01:03:39,162
Hi, I'm sure you
have a job to do.

1400
01:03:39,164 --> 01:03:40,229
I don't need a free trip.

1401
01:03:40,231 --> 01:03:41,233
<i>Hi.</i>

1402
01:03:44,269 --> 01:03:45,471
<i>Brotherfucker.</i>

1403
01:03:48,439 --> 01:03:51,041
- Emily?
- <i>No, no, Emily's dead.</i>

1404
01:03:51,043 --> 01:03:53,542
<i>Oh, no, have you
forgotten already?</i>

1405
01:03:53,544 --> 01:03:55,345
- Where are you?
- <i>I'm in heaven.</i>

1406
01:03:55,347 --> 01:03:57,513
<i>Watching over you.</i>

1407
01:03:57,515 --> 01:03:58,985
<i>Nice blouse, by the way.</i>

1408
01:04:01,385 --> 01:04:03,253
Why are you doing this?

1409
01:04:03,255 --> 01:04:04,820
<i>How do you know
it's just me doing it?</i>

1410
01:04:04,822 --> 01:04:07,192
<i>Hey, hey, hey,
kiss Sean for me,</i>

1411
01:04:07,726 --> 01:04:09,260
<i>four million times.</i>

1412
01:04:15,099 --> 01:04:15,999
Oh, hey.

1413
01:04:16,001 --> 01:04:18,133
Are you trying
to <i>Diabolique</i> me?

1414
01:04:18,135 --> 01:04:19,369
What are you
talking about?

1415
01:04:19,371 --> 01:04:20,236
<i>Diabolique,</i> you know?

1416
01:04:20,238 --> 01:04:23,372
The French movie
about the guy whose wife

1417
01:04:23,374 --> 01:04:25,075
and mistress,
they're trying to kill him.

1418
01:04:25,077 --> 01:04:26,309
But I don't have
a $4 million

1419
01:04:26,311 --> 01:04:27,676
- insurance policy.
- Stephanie...

1420
01:04:27,678 --> 01:04:30,379
If you and Emily are in some kind
of plan, please just call it off...

1421
01:04:30,381 --> 01:04:32,314
- Stephanie.
- I'm really not the one.

1422
01:04:32,316 --> 01:04:33,850
Just breathe, please.

1423
01:04:33,852 --> 01:04:36,419
Nicky's getting to you.
Emily is dead.

1424
01:04:36,421 --> 01:04:37,656
She called me.

1425
01:04:38,490 --> 01:04:39,823
What?

1426
01:04:39,825 --> 01:04:41,291
She called me today.

1427
01:04:41,293 --> 01:04:42,658
I have a friend
in the psychology department.

1428
01:04:42,660 --> 01:04:43,725
I'll give him a call.

1429
01:04:43,727 --> 01:04:45,327
Hey, handsome,
you got time...

1430
01:04:45,329 --> 01:04:48,497
I am sorry. I didn't know
you were in a meeting.

1431
01:04:48,499 --> 01:04:49,832
Beth, this is Stephanie.

1432
01:04:49,834 --> 01:04:51,533
Nice to meet you.

1433
01:04:51,535 --> 01:04:53,236
Nice to meet you.

1434
01:04:53,238 --> 01:04:55,204
I was just wondering
if you needed

1435
01:04:55,206 --> 01:04:57,307
to use the SMART board,
'cause it's broken.

1436
01:04:57,309 --> 01:04:59,278
- I can live without it.
- All right.

1437
01:05:00,111 --> 01:05:01,180
All right.

1438
01:05:03,215 --> 01:05:04,379
She seems nice.

1439
01:05:04,381 --> 01:05:06,349
Stephanie, go home.

1440
01:05:06,351 --> 01:05:08,218
Emily had some Xanax
in the medicine cabinet.

1441
01:05:08,220 --> 01:05:09,318
Take one. Take two.

1442
01:05:09,320 --> 01:05:11,820
Yeah. Maybe she has
some heroin lying around. Hmm?

1443
01:05:11,822 --> 01:05:14,459
This is all just grief.
Just stages of grief.

1444
01:05:15,526 --> 01:05:16,892
I'm sorry,
you're right.

1445
01:05:16,894 --> 01:05:19,364
I'm so overwhelmed,
and I...

1446
01:05:20,398 --> 01:05:21,733
I'm sorry.

1447
01:05:26,704 --> 01:05:29,240
<i>Oh, baby, you just
need someone to love you.</i>

1448
01:05:30,675 --> 01:05:34,309
I have you.
All you need is a good friend.

1449
01:05:34,311 --> 01:05:35,879
Come on,
don't you miss sex?

1450
01:05:35,881 --> 01:05:39,149
Having a man fuck you
on top of a washing machine?

1451
01:05:39,151 --> 01:05:41,651
Barely remember
what it's like.

1452
01:05:41,653 --> 01:05:42,751
Why are you
such a masochist?

1453
01:05:42,753 --> 01:05:44,521
You could have a man
in your bed any time you want.

1454
01:05:44,523 --> 01:05:46,555
I had a man,
I ruined that, so...

1455
01:05:46,557 --> 01:05:47,756
What does that mean?

1456
01:05:47,758 --> 01:05:50,160
Come on, what
does that mean?

1457
01:05:50,162 --> 01:05:52,428
If you can't tell me,
you can't tell anyone.

1458
01:05:52,430 --> 01:05:53,432
I'm your best friend.

1459
01:06:13,818 --> 01:06:15,454
Let's
go see Daddy.

1460
01:06:19,523 --> 01:06:20,789
<i>I just want the truth.</i>

1461
01:06:20,791 --> 01:06:22,191
<i>What are you talking about?</i>

1462
01:06:22,193 --> 01:06:24,693
About Miles and Chris.

1463
01:06:24,695 --> 01:06:27,396
Chris? My brother, Chris?

1464
01:06:27,398 --> 01:06:29,332
Yeah, your brother.

1465
01:06:29,334 --> 01:06:31,901
And you certainly
don't act like it.

1466
01:06:31,903 --> 01:06:34,836
Sometimes it's more like
you guys are lovers, right?

1467
01:06:36,640 --> 01:06:38,575
That's disgusting.
That's...

1468
01:06:38,577 --> 01:06:39,812
Is Miles mine or not?

1469
01:06:42,680 --> 01:06:43,812
Oh, my God!

1470
01:06:43,814 --> 01:06:45,847
Are you listening
to yourself?

1471
01:06:45,849 --> 01:06:47,416
You sound ridiculous.

1472
01:06:47,418 --> 01:06:48,853
Yeah.

1473
01:06:55,626 --> 01:06:58,428
<i>Davis! Davis!</i>

1474
01:06:58,430 --> 01:07:00,396
Where are you going?

1475
01:07:00,398 --> 01:07:01,863
Where are you going? Davis?

1476
01:07:01,865 --> 01:07:03,233
Steph, it's all right.
Don't worry.

1477
01:07:03,235 --> 01:07:04,733
Just gonna
go for a drive.

1478
01:07:04,735 --> 01:07:06,236
Have a little talk.
Man to man.

1479
01:07:06,238 --> 01:07:07,239
No problem.

1480
01:07:27,925 --> 01:07:29,527
<i>It's my fault.</i>

1481
01:07:31,463 --> 01:07:33,329
I'm the reason
they're both dead.

1482
01:07:33,331 --> 01:07:34,963
No.

1483
01:07:34,965 --> 01:07:36,634
Hey, don't do that.

1484
01:07:37,501 --> 01:07:39,434
People do terrible things

1485
01:07:39,436 --> 01:07:40,602
for their own
fucked-up reasons.

1486
01:07:40,604 --> 01:07:41,671
That's on them,

1487
01:07:41,673 --> 01:07:42,675
- it's not on you.
- Yeah.

1488
01:07:44,976 --> 01:07:46,311
I miss him.

1489
01:07:47,044 --> 01:07:48,414
Which one?

1490
01:07:50,548 --> 01:07:51,650
Both.

1491
01:07:52,916 --> 01:07:54,986
I'm lonely.

1492
01:07:57,588 --> 01:07:59,421
I think loneliness
probably kills more people

1493
01:07:59,423 --> 01:08:00,458
than cancer.

1494
01:08:03,494 --> 01:08:05,463
Hey, come here.

1495
01:08:07,631 --> 01:08:08,867
Come here.

1496
01:08:24,848 --> 01:08:27,619
You're okay.
Want to order pizza?

1497
01:08:32,557 --> 01:08:35,958
Oh, God. God,
I'm so embarrassed.

1498
01:08:35,960 --> 01:08:40,896
Oh, because of that?
No, hey. It's all good, baby.

1499
01:08:40,898 --> 01:08:42,567
It's all good.
Just another Tuesday.

1500
01:09:25,110 --> 01:09:26,512
<i>Go away.</i>

1501
01:09:27,379 --> 01:09:28,847
Diana Hyland?

1502
01:09:29,848 --> 01:09:31,015
Did you paint this?

1503
01:09:43,795 --> 01:09:45,395
Where on Earth
did you find it?

1504
01:09:45,397 --> 01:09:48,434
I should start by giving you
some unfortunate news.

1505
01:09:49,467 --> 01:09:50,768
Emily's dead.

1506
01:09:51,503 --> 01:09:53,002
My condolences.

1507
01:09:53,004 --> 01:09:54,506
Who the fuck is Emily?

1508
01:09:55,139 --> 01:09:56,541
The girl in the painting.

1509
01:10:00,044 --> 01:10:01,476
Good.

1510
01:10:01,478 --> 01:10:02,779
Her name's not Emily.

1511
01:10:02,781 --> 01:10:03,782
Her name's Claudia.

1512
01:10:04,915 --> 01:10:07,449
Rest in peace, asshole.

1513
01:10:07,451 --> 01:10:09,618
So, not a pleasant memory
for you, then?

1514
01:10:09,620 --> 01:10:12,454
No, opposite.
She was amazing.

1515
01:10:12,456 --> 01:10:15,190
I mean, she was the best
that I ever had.

1516
01:10:15,192 --> 01:10:16,758
I was selling paintings.

1517
01:10:16,760 --> 01:10:18,194
You know,
it was the first time

1518
01:10:18,196 --> 01:10:20,195
in my career
that I had any buzz.

1519
01:10:20,197 --> 01:10:22,097
She walked
into my gallery.

1520
01:10:22,099 --> 01:10:24,801
A real fucking muse
just right out of thin air.

1521
01:10:24,803 --> 01:10:26,002
What happened?

1522
01:10:26,004 --> 01:10:27,506
She was all I could paint.

1523
01:10:29,040 --> 01:10:31,207
I memorized
every inch of her body.

1524
01:10:31,209 --> 01:10:32,874
<i>My dealer fucking hated it.</i>

1525
01:10:32,876 --> 01:10:34,743
<i>And the art critics
fucking hated it.</i>

1526
01:10:34,745 --> 01:10:38,079
<i>They called me a knockoff
dyke Mapplethorpe.</i>

1527
01:10:38,081 --> 01:10:41,117
<i>Anyway, I blew my whole career
painting that con artist.</i>

1528
01:10:41,119 --> 01:10:43,552
Now all I paint
are these goddamn knives,

1529
01:10:43,554 --> 01:10:45,855
which are pretty good, but
nobody wants to buy this shit.

1530
01:10:45,857 --> 01:10:49,094
Oh, what? They're so good.
People are just jealous.

1531
01:10:52,629 --> 01:10:54,763
I haven't had a drink
in 42 days.

1532
01:10:54,765 --> 01:10:55,864
Oh, don't...

1533
01:10:55,866 --> 01:10:57,733
Might as well celebrate.

1534
01:10:57,735 --> 01:10:59,938
Mmm, well, cheers.

1535
01:11:02,973 --> 01:11:05,410
I gave her my heart
and I gave her my soul.

1536
01:11:06,478 --> 01:11:09,979
I paid for her
to go to college.

1537
01:11:09,981 --> 01:11:11,580
I paid off her debts.

1538
01:11:11,582 --> 01:11:13,483
Did you ever
see any heroin use?

1539
01:11:13,485 --> 01:11:15,685
No. No way, her?

1540
01:11:15,687 --> 01:11:17,022
No, she didn't touch it.

1541
01:11:17,589 --> 01:11:18,721
Shit.

1542
01:11:18,723 --> 01:11:22,190
She never let me paint
her face except for this one.

1543
01:11:22,192 --> 01:11:25,227
I've never seen
such a beautiful girl

1544
01:11:25,229 --> 01:11:26,863
wanna be so invisible

1545
01:11:26,865 --> 01:11:29,131
or just completely vanish.

1546
01:11:29,133 --> 01:11:30,666
But you know
what, it takes

1547
01:11:30,668 --> 01:11:32,168
money to vanish.

1548
01:11:32,170 --> 01:11:35,607
And so she took everything
that she could from me.

1549
01:11:37,808 --> 01:11:39,177
You know
how I would paint you?

1550
01:11:41,912 --> 01:11:43,779
Beatific.

1551
01:11:43,781 --> 01:11:45,150
Like a fucking saint.

1552
01:11:45,950 --> 01:11:47,186
I get that a lot.

1553
01:11:48,553 --> 01:11:50,522
You should embrace it.
People love saints.

1554
01:11:51,622 --> 01:11:53,724
Yeah. After they're dead.

1555
01:11:55,660 --> 01:11:57,827
Okay. What do you know
about her? How did she die?

1556
01:11:57,829 --> 01:11:58,897
In a lake.

1557
01:11:59,997 --> 01:12:01,098
On heroin.

1558
01:12:04,268 --> 01:12:06,802
Well, you don't believe that
or you wouldn't be here.

1559
01:12:06,804 --> 01:12:09,541
She didn't ever mention
Michigan, did she?

1560
01:12:17,014 --> 01:12:19,916
That is the only thing
that she ever left here.

1561
01:12:19,918 --> 01:12:22,086
She said she had it
since she was a kid.

1562
01:12:25,022 --> 01:12:26,087
I warn you,

1563
01:12:26,089 --> 01:12:28,056
you go poking around
in her past,

1564
01:12:28,058 --> 01:12:30,927
you're gonna find some shit
that is terrifying.

1565
01:12:30,929 --> 01:12:33,699
She was not a normal person
like you or me.

1566
01:12:34,566 --> 01:12:36,032
Sean, it's Stephanie...

1567
01:12:36,034 --> 01:12:37,833
I thought about
what you said.

1568
01:12:37,835 --> 01:12:40,703
You're right. These are
just stages of grief.

1569
01:12:40,705 --> 01:12:43,038
<i>This experience has been
so stressful for both of us,</i>

1570
01:12:43,040 --> 01:12:44,640
<i>I'm gonna take
a couple of days to myself.</i>

1571
01:12:44,642 --> 01:12:46,007
<i>I'll have Sona
pick up the boys,</i>

1572
01:12:46,009 --> 01:12:47,275
<i>and they can stay
at her house tonight.</i>

1573
01:12:47,277 --> 01:12:49,211
<i>You should take
some time, too.</i>

1574
01:12:49,213 --> 01:12:50,645
<i>There's ham stew
in the freezer.</i>

1575
01:12:50,647 --> 01:12:51,814
<i>Five minutes
in the microwave.</i>

1576
01:12:51,816 --> 01:12:52,818
<i>Lots of love.</i>

1577
01:12:55,053 --> 01:12:56,918
Yeah, we've been
saving young souls

1578
01:12:56,920 --> 01:12:58,620
going on 50 years now.

1579
01:12:58,622 --> 01:13:00,256
Not Bobby and me personally.

1580
01:13:00,258 --> 01:13:02,123
Well, it seems
just perfect!

1581
01:13:02,125 --> 01:13:03,726
And my son's
practically a porpoise,

1582
01:13:03,728 --> 01:13:05,895
so I know he's gonna love
swimming in that pond.

1583
01:13:05,897 --> 01:13:06,995
That's Squaw Lake!

1584
01:13:06,997 --> 01:13:09,798
The kids all joke
that it's holy water.

1585
01:13:09,800 --> 01:13:11,233
Any fish
you pull out of there

1586
01:13:11,235 --> 01:13:12,802
is guaranteed
to feed a multitude.

1587
01:13:12,804 --> 01:13:14,669
Oh! Oh. That's so funny.

1588
01:13:14,671 --> 01:13:15,904
Yeah.

1589
01:13:15,906 --> 01:13:19,641
Um... Have you guys
got any old photo albums

1590
01:13:19,643 --> 01:13:21,743
or a yearbook
I could look at?

1591
01:13:21,745 --> 01:13:23,244
I always feel like
there's no better review

1592
01:13:23,246 --> 01:13:25,146
of a place than the faces
of the campers.

1593
01:13:25,148 --> 01:13:27,650
Oh, heck, yeah. We got a ton
of 'em down in the basement.

1594
01:13:27,652 --> 01:13:28,987
You'll see nothing
but smiles.

1595
01:13:52,744 --> 01:13:54,179
Hope and Faith.

1596
01:13:56,947 --> 01:14:00,815
<i>Hi. I'm looking
for the McLanden Foundation.</i>

1597
01:14:00,817 --> 01:14:02,818
<i>Is this Margaret McLanden?</i>

1598
01:14:02,820 --> 01:14:04,020
<i>Who's this?</i>

1599
01:14:04,022 --> 01:14:07,155
Yeah. Hi, there. My name's
Maryanne Chelkowsky.

1600
01:14:07,157 --> 01:14:09,725
I'm the director
of the Squaw Lake Bible Camp.

1601
01:14:09,727 --> 01:14:10,760
<i>What do you want?</i>

1602
01:14:10,762 --> 01:14:13,428
Well, we are putting together
the 50th anniversary

1603
01:14:13,430 --> 01:14:15,030
edition of our camp gazette.

1604
01:14:15,032 --> 01:14:16,998
We're trying to track down
some star alumni.

1605
01:14:17,000 --> 01:14:20,368
Are you any relation to
Hope and Faith McLanden?

1606
01:14:20,370 --> 01:14:22,704
- <i>Hello.</i>
- <i>Bruce, it's that camp.</i>

1607
01:14:22,706 --> 01:14:25,074
<i>The girls must have done
something again and God...</i>

1608
01:14:25,076 --> 01:14:26,342
<i>Girls are
long gone, Mrs. M.</i>

1609
01:14:26,344 --> 01:14:27,409
<i>You just go on back
to your chair.</i>

1610
01:14:27,411 --> 01:14:29,078
<i>But it's
filthy there, Bruce.</i>

1611
01:14:29,080 --> 01:14:30,178
<i>I've asked you a...</i>

1612
01:14:30,180 --> 01:14:31,650
Gotcha.

1613
01:15:15,026 --> 01:15:16,327
Take your time, Bruce.

1614
01:15:38,515 --> 01:15:39,951
Mrs. McLanden?

1615
01:15:41,786 --> 01:15:43,722
Hi, I'm Gloria
from the cleaning service.

1616
01:15:44,088 --> 01:15:45,186
Who?

1617
01:15:45,188 --> 01:15:46,087
Didn't Bruce tell you?

1618
01:15:46,089 --> 01:15:47,388
I'm supposed to clean
the entire place

1619
01:15:47,390 --> 01:15:48,457
until you could eat

1620
01:15:48,459 --> 01:15:50,391
a four-course meal
off the floor.

1621
01:15:50,393 --> 01:15:51,827
Did I get the date...

1622
01:15:51,829 --> 01:15:53,331
Shoot!

1623
01:15:56,768 --> 01:15:58,737
Start in my
upstairs bathroom.

1624
01:16:04,509 --> 01:16:06,445
It's not lying
if I'm actually cleaning.

1625
01:16:24,195 --> 01:16:25,327
Bruce!

1626
01:16:25,329 --> 01:16:26,732
The fire's dying!

1627
01:16:28,232 --> 01:16:29,401
Bruce!

1628
01:16:43,915 --> 01:16:45,980
I couldn't help
noticing that

1629
01:16:45,982 --> 01:16:47,518
lovely picture
of your daughters.

1630
01:16:49,920 --> 01:16:51,287
Where's Bruce?

1631
01:16:51,289 --> 01:16:52,520
- Bruce!
- Oh, um...

1632
01:16:52,522 --> 01:16:54,825
Bruce had to
go out. Um...

1633
01:16:55,192 --> 01:16:56,360
So,

1634
01:16:57,295 --> 01:16:58,593
your daughter, Faith...

1635
01:16:58,595 --> 01:17:00,195
She had some trouble,
I gather?

1636
01:17:00,197 --> 01:17:01,363
Troubles!

1637
01:17:03,067 --> 01:17:05,137
Troubles would've
been a vacation.

1638
01:17:06,571 --> 01:17:09,471
That child
came straight from hell.

1639
01:17:09,473 --> 01:17:12,307
That's a very strong
statement for a mother.

1640
01:17:12,309 --> 01:17:13,876
Are you a mother?

1641
01:17:13,878 --> 01:17:17,312
Yes. I love
every minute of it.

1642
01:17:17,314 --> 01:17:19,080
Aww.

1643
01:17:19,082 --> 01:17:20,317
Then you must have
brain damage.

1644
01:17:21,152 --> 01:17:23,017
It's a thankless business.

1645
01:17:23,019 --> 01:17:26,154
And some children
are just born rotten.

1646
01:17:26,156 --> 01:17:29,391
They don't need a parent.
They need an exorcist.

1647
01:17:29,393 --> 01:17:31,496
My husband
understood that.

1648
01:17:33,964 --> 01:17:35,631
Now, wait.
Don't tell Bruce!

1649
01:17:35,633 --> 01:17:37,600
- No.
- Bingo!

1650
01:17:37,602 --> 01:17:40,438
It's unseemly,
the way that man polices me.

1651
01:17:41,272 --> 01:17:42,637
Would you like
some sherry?

1652
01:17:42,639 --> 01:17:44,573
Oh, no, thank you.
You're very sweet.

1653
01:17:44,575 --> 01:17:46,876
Wait, that's...

1654
01:17:46,878 --> 01:17:49,611
That's not sherry.
That's the gin.

1655
01:17:49,613 --> 01:17:50,945
Where's the sherry?

1656
01:17:50,947 --> 01:17:52,648
Must be behind
the Sylvia Plath.

1657
01:17:52,650 --> 01:17:54,318
What ever happened
to Faith?

1658
01:17:55,152 --> 01:17:56,517
Oh, everything. Everything.

1659
01:17:56,519 --> 01:18:00,189
We spent so much money
on her rehab.

1660
01:18:00,191 --> 01:18:02,490
Hope tried to help
take care of her

1661
01:18:02,492 --> 01:18:05,927
and get her off that stuff.

1662
01:18:05,929 --> 01:18:09,097
Of course, Hope's a born
liar with terrible posture.

1663
01:18:09,099 --> 01:18:10,431
Uh, Mrs. McLanden?

1664
01:18:10,433 --> 01:18:14,004
Do you know the person
in this photograph?

1665
01:18:16,907 --> 01:18:19,475
That's Faith.
That's Faith!

1666
01:18:19,477 --> 01:18:21,342
Now, why're you...
Did she send you?

1667
01:18:21,344 --> 01:18:23,345
- No, I'm not even sure...
- Are you the police?

1668
01:18:23,347 --> 01:18:24,546
No, I'm just ask...

1669
01:18:24,548 --> 01:18:26,282
I have told you people
a thousand times.

1670
01:18:26,284 --> 01:18:29,985
My memory is not good anymore.
It will not stand up in court.

1671
01:18:29,987 --> 01:18:31,252
The night of that fire,

1672
01:18:31,254 --> 01:18:33,254
my husband and I
were estranged.

1673
01:18:33,256 --> 01:18:34,957
We lived in separate wings
of the house.

1674
01:18:34,959 --> 01:18:37,693
The fire that burned down
the west wing?

1675
01:18:37,695 --> 01:18:39,363
Are you an insurance agent?

1676
01:18:40,196 --> 01:18:41,430
Yes.

1677
01:18:41,432 --> 01:18:43,132
Oh!

1678
01:18:43,134 --> 01:18:46,135
Oh, good! Oh, good, good.

1679
01:18:46,137 --> 01:18:47,368
Oh, Bruce and I
have been waiting

1680
01:18:47,370 --> 01:18:48,937
for the insurance money.

1681
01:18:48,939 --> 01:18:52,408
Of course, you assholes
had that clause about arson.

1682
01:18:52,410 --> 01:18:54,677
- Arson. Yeah.
- Vultures.

1683
01:18:54,679 --> 01:18:56,611
Here's to being house poor!

1684
01:18:56,613 --> 01:18:58,948
You ain't supposed
to be drinking, Mrs. M.

1685
01:18:58,950 --> 01:19:00,215
- Who are you?
- Well, uh...

1686
01:19:00,217 --> 01:19:03,217
Thank you so much
for your time, Mrs. McLanden.

1687
01:19:03,219 --> 01:19:05,721
I will get you that
faux Givenchy suit in ivory

1688
01:19:05,723 --> 01:19:08,090
and the scarf in taupe.

1689
01:19:08,092 --> 01:19:10,592
I will put a rush on it!
Thank you for your order!

1690
01:19:10,594 --> 01:19:12,397
Shit. Okay.

1691
01:19:49,433 --> 01:19:51,036
Where do you think
you're going?

1692
01:19:51,736 --> 01:19:53,034
Uh...

1693
01:19:53,036 --> 01:19:55,339
I wanted to order
the navy blazer.

1694
01:19:56,406 --> 01:19:58,008
Extra large.

1695
01:19:58,541 --> 01:19:59,544
Great.

1696
01:20:05,383 --> 01:20:06,547
Hello.

1697
01:20:06,549 --> 01:20:08,016
What do you want, cupcake?

1698
01:20:08,018 --> 01:20:10,319
I'm looking for
all the Wayne County

1699
01:20:10,321 --> 01:20:11,419
arson-related news items

1700
01:20:11,421 --> 01:20:12,656
for the last 20 years.

1701
01:20:22,299 --> 01:20:24,365
<i>Hi, moms, Stephanie here.</i>

1702
01:20:24,367 --> 01:20:26,702
<i>I'm coming to you
from Michigan.</i>

1703
01:20:26,704 --> 01:20:29,273
<i>Special on-the-road edition.</i>

1704
01:20:31,409 --> 01:20:33,108
<i>As many of you know,</i>

1705
01:20:33,110 --> 01:20:34,610
<i>I was struggling
to find closure</i>

1706
01:20:34,612 --> 01:20:36,779
<i>surrounding the death
of my best friend.</i>

1707
01:20:36,781 --> 01:20:39,515
<i>So I drove up to the lake
where she drowned</i>

1708
01:20:39,517 --> 01:20:43,418
<i>to see if I could
dredge something up.</i>

1709
01:20:43,420 --> 01:20:44,819
Oh, shit.

1710
01:20:44,821 --> 01:20:45,687
<i>Well, it turns out</i>

1711
01:20:45,689 --> 01:20:48,257
this is the site
of many a canoe race

1712
01:20:48,259 --> 01:20:50,191
at the Squaw Lake Bible Camp.

1713
01:20:50,193 --> 01:20:52,560
<i>I had to dig through
a bunch of camp journals,</i>

1714
01:20:52,562 --> 01:20:56,364
<i>and I found
a photo of Emily,</i>

1715
01:20:56,366 --> 01:20:58,667
<i>whose middle name is Claudia.</i>

1716
01:20:58,669 --> 01:21:00,135
<i>Not pretty
I didn't know that.</i>

1717
01:21:00,137 --> 01:21:03,538
You crazy fucking bitch.

1718
01:21:03,540 --> 01:21:05,740
It's like looking at
an angel, isn't it, moms?

1719
01:21:05,742 --> 01:21:07,508
Brotherfucker.

1720
01:21:07,510 --> 01:21:09,544
And it gave me
the closure I needed.

1721
01:21:09,546 --> 01:21:11,814
<i>I feel closer to Emily
than I've ever felt.</i>

1722
01:21:11,816 --> 01:21:13,748
<i>Almost like a twin.</i>

1723
01:21:13,750 --> 01:21:15,519
Emily, wherever you are,

1724
01:21:17,353 --> 01:21:20,025
I hope that
you're listening.

1725
01:21:21,157 --> 01:21:22,626
And you gotta have faith.

1726
01:21:24,327 --> 01:21:26,764
Brotherfucker!

1727
01:21:36,874 --> 01:21:38,574
<i>? Things that we need</i>

1728
01:21:38,576 --> 01:21:40,175
<i>? Money, clothes,
Weed, indeed</i>

1729
01:21:40,177 --> 01:21:42,444
<i>? Hats, food, booze
Essentials, credentials</i>

1730
01:21:42,446 --> 01:21:44,812
<i>? Code of the streets
Owners who creep</i>

1731
01:21:44,814 --> 01:21:47,248
<i>? Slow when you sleep
Holdin' the heat</i>

1732
01:21:47,250 --> 01:21:49,584
<i>? Put holes in your jeep
Respect the streets</i>

1733
01:21:49,586 --> 01:21:53,057
<i>? It's the L-I-L-F-A-M-E ?</i>

1734
01:21:53,756 --> 01:21:55,757
Mom's home!

1735
01:21:55,759 --> 01:21:57,659
Oh, Smoochie-smooch?

1736
01:21:57,661 --> 01:21:58,593
Oh, my goodness!

1737
01:21:58,595 --> 01:22:00,432
Smooch, I missed you so much!

1738
01:22:01,131 --> 01:22:02,097
Where were you?

1739
01:22:02,099 --> 01:22:04,565
And why did we have to sleep
at Hector's house?

1740
01:22:04,567 --> 01:22:05,801
He pees the bed!

1741
01:22:05,803 --> 01:22:07,802
Oh! Hector's the worst!

1742
01:22:07,804 --> 01:22:09,273
They could've stayed
with me, you know.

1743
01:22:10,875 --> 01:22:12,740
I thought we all
needed a breather.

1744
01:22:12,742 --> 01:22:14,411
Now I feel like
a million bucks.

1745
01:22:14,812 --> 01:22:16,247
Maybe even four.

1746
01:22:19,450 --> 01:22:21,350
Hi, my name's Beth.

1747
01:22:21,352 --> 01:22:23,418
I'm calling on behalf of
my boss, Sean Townsend,

1748
01:22:23,420 --> 01:22:25,486
about his wife,
Emily Nelson's policy.

1749
01:22:25,488 --> 01:22:31,360
The number is CT7602258001.

1750
01:22:31,362 --> 01:22:32,427
Can you tell me the name
of the agent

1751
01:22:32,429 --> 01:22:33,627
who handles
that account, please?

1752
01:22:33,629 --> 01:22:35,763
<i>Dear Miss Prager,
my name is Bruce Hargrave.</i>

1753
01:22:35,765 --> 01:22:37,498
<i>I'm writing to you about
a case you're handling</i>

1754
01:22:37,500 --> 01:22:39,568
<i>for Emily Nelson,
recently deceased.</i>

1755
01:22:39,570 --> 01:22:40,636
<i>I have been the caretaker</i>

1756
01:22:40,638 --> 01:22:42,503
<i>of her family estate
for many years.</i>

1757
01:22:42,505 --> 01:22:43,771
<i>What I have to say
will sound crazy,</i>

1758
01:22:43,773 --> 01:22:45,940
<i>but years ago, my employer
died in a house fire.</i>

1759
01:22:45,942 --> 01:22:47,775
<i>His teen daughters,
Hope and Faith McLanden,</i>

1760
01:22:47,777 --> 01:22:49,310
<i>disappeared without a trace.</i>

1761
01:22:49,312 --> 01:22:50,412
<i>I'm attaching an old photo.</i>

1762
01:22:50,414 --> 01:22:51,812
Hi, this is Sean Townsend.

1763
01:22:51,814 --> 01:22:53,351
I was meant to meet
Billy Kent for lunch.

1764
01:22:54,919 --> 01:22:56,450
What do you mean?

1765
01:22:56,452 --> 01:22:58,689
You guys called two days
ago to organize this.

1766
01:23:02,960 --> 01:23:04,626
No, never mind.

1767
01:23:04,628 --> 01:23:05,763
I'll call him back.

1768
01:23:06,563 --> 01:23:07,564
Boo.

1769
01:23:13,237 --> 01:23:14,468
Oh, come on,
you dumb shit.

1770
01:23:14,470 --> 01:23:15,604
We've spent
every anniversary here.

1771
01:23:15,606 --> 01:23:16,907
How could you not
put it together?

1772
01:23:17,441 --> 01:23:18,907
Emily, why?

1773
01:23:18,909 --> 01:23:20,641
I have four million
reasons why.

1774
01:23:20,643 --> 01:23:22,476
How could you
do this to Nicky?

1775
01:23:22,478 --> 01:23:23,779
I did this for Nicky.

1776
01:23:23,781 --> 01:23:25,980
I hated that job.
I never got to see him.

1777
01:23:25,982 --> 01:23:27,716
It's not like we could
live off your faculty buffet

1778
01:23:27,718 --> 01:23:29,751
the rest of our lives,
could we?

1779
01:23:29,753 --> 01:23:31,520
I grieved your death.

1780
01:23:31,522 --> 01:23:33,521
I understand.

1781
01:23:33,523 --> 01:23:35,423
You're not alone.
They say that

1782
01:23:35,425 --> 01:23:37,592
90% of people
who lose their spouse

1783
01:23:37,594 --> 01:23:39,694
end up sleeping with
their spouse's best friend

1784
01:23:39,696 --> 01:23:41,296
after their funeral,
actually.

1785
01:23:41,298 --> 01:23:42,263
Really?

1786
01:23:42,265 --> 01:23:45,601
No, I just made that up,
you fucking dick.

1787
01:23:45,603 --> 01:23:47,235
That's how you grieve?

1788
01:23:47,237 --> 01:23:48,936
Balls deep
in my best friend?

1789
01:23:48,938 --> 01:23:49,971
You could've
told me something.

1790
01:23:49,973 --> 01:23:52,274
Except you can't keep
a secret, even in the dark.

1791
01:23:52,276 --> 01:23:54,612
- Anything.
- You almost ruined everything.

1792
01:23:56,580 --> 01:23:58,279
I had to lay low
until the insurance money

1793
01:23:58,281 --> 01:23:59,215
came through.

1794
01:23:59,217 --> 01:24:01,984
And so why didn't you stay low?
Hmm?

1795
01:24:01,986 --> 01:24:04,386
Instead, you
terrorized our son.

1796
01:24:04,388 --> 01:24:05,354
I didn't terrorize him.

1797
01:24:05,356 --> 01:24:06,754
You made me think
that he had gone insane

1798
01:24:06,756 --> 01:24:08,623
as well as Stephanie.

1799
01:24:08,625 --> 01:24:10,525
I missed him too much.

1800
01:24:10,527 --> 01:24:11,796
He's my little dude.

1801
01:24:12,896 --> 01:24:14,465
You know how much
I love that kid.

1802
01:24:16,700 --> 01:24:18,333
Well, the clock
is ticking now.

1803
01:24:18,335 --> 01:24:20,534
Nancy Drew knows too much.

1804
01:24:20,536 --> 01:24:22,503
If she fucks up my insurance
money coming through,

1805
01:24:22,505 --> 01:24:23,971
I'm taking you
down with me.

1806
01:24:23,973 --> 01:24:25,574
You're taking me
down with you?

1807
01:24:25,576 --> 01:24:27,008
Well, of course,
this was all your plan.

1808
01:24:27,010 --> 01:24:28,443
My plan?

1809
01:24:28,445 --> 01:24:29,810
I had nothing
to do with it...

1810
01:24:29,812 --> 01:24:31,012
Why are you
playing dumb now?

1811
01:24:31,014 --> 01:24:32,681
...you twisted
fucking psycho.

1812
01:24:32,683 --> 01:24:33,851
I don't know where...

1813
01:24:36,687 --> 01:24:38,555
What were you saying about
me being a fucking psycho?

1814
01:24:39,857 --> 01:24:41,422
Do you love her?

1815
01:24:41,424 --> 01:24:43,592
No. It was just sex.

1816
01:24:43,594 --> 01:24:46,364
Did you think of me
when you were fucking her?

1817
01:24:46,629 --> 01:24:47,631
Yes.

1818
01:24:50,467 --> 01:24:52,066
Do you love me
or not, baby?

1819
01:24:52,068 --> 01:24:53,769
Of course I do.

1820
01:24:53,771 --> 01:24:55,537
She doesn't mean
a thing to me.

1821
01:24:55,539 --> 01:24:56,771
Good.

1822
01:24:58,875 --> 01:25:00,708
Oh, shit. Oh, shit.

1823
01:25:00,710 --> 01:25:01,909
I forgot to load it.

1824
01:25:01,911 --> 01:25:03,578
Fuck. Oh, God.

1825
01:25:03,580 --> 01:25:05,681
Can you imagine
if I would've, though?

1826
01:25:05,683 --> 01:25:06,847
What a mess.

1827
01:25:06,849 --> 01:25:08,684
Emily, you're crazy.

1828
01:25:08,686 --> 01:25:11,019
Hey, it's pretty
simple. You know?

1829
01:25:11,021 --> 01:25:12,924
It's your choice.
Her or me?

1830
01:25:13,790 --> 01:25:14,992
It's not that hard.

1831
01:25:16,927 --> 01:25:17,929
Hey.

1832
01:25:18,495 --> 01:25:19,828
Stop it.

1833
01:25:19,830 --> 01:25:21,962
You love this.

1834
01:25:21,964 --> 01:25:24,334
Meet me in the bathroom
in 20 seconds.

1835
01:25:26,336 --> 01:25:27,604
Knock twice.

1836
01:25:41,384 --> 01:25:42,450
There he is now.

1837
01:25:42,452 --> 01:25:45,820
Mr. Townsend, Isabel Prager,
Addison First Insurance.

1838
01:25:45,822 --> 01:25:47,521
I'm investigating
the death benefit claim

1839
01:25:47,523 --> 01:25:48,793
for your late wife.

1840
01:25:52,396 --> 01:25:53,398
Sean,

1841
01:25:54,598 --> 01:25:56,501
did you know that
Emily had a twin?

1842
01:25:59,135 --> 01:26:00,668
No, but...

1843
01:26:00,670 --> 01:26:02,471
Well, I hate
to even say this,

1844
01:26:02,473 --> 01:26:03,939
but it means
the body in the lake

1845
01:26:03,941 --> 01:26:05,873
could be this sister.

1846
01:26:05,875 --> 01:26:07,575
It could explain
the DNA match.

1847
01:26:07,577 --> 01:26:08,677
And if that's the case,

1848
01:26:08,679 --> 01:26:10,915
then where is Emily?

1849
01:26:15,518 --> 01:26:18,153
If my wife was still alive,
she'd come home.

1850
01:26:18,155 --> 01:26:19,357
She'd wanna see her son.

1851
01:26:21,892 --> 01:26:23,158
I'm not a cop,

1852
01:26:23,160 --> 01:26:24,993
and I'm definitely
no therapist,

1853
01:26:24,995 --> 01:26:27,495
I'm just an insurance guy.

1854
01:26:27,497 --> 01:26:30,532
But this is an incredibly
interesting case.

1855
01:26:30,534 --> 01:26:32,767
This is just bananas,
isn't it?

1856
01:26:32,769 --> 01:26:34,602
- Yeah.
- I will say,

1857
01:26:34,604 --> 01:26:36,003
it's unusual

1858
01:26:36,005 --> 01:26:37,806
to live with someone
as husband and wife

1859
01:26:37,808 --> 01:26:39,074
and not know
that they have a twin.

1860
01:26:39,076 --> 01:26:41,042
She was a very
private person.

1861
01:26:41,044 --> 01:26:44,145
Well, hey,
we all have our secrets.

1862
01:26:46,482 --> 01:26:47,949
But, as I'm sure
you can understand,

1863
01:26:47,951 --> 01:26:49,484
with a payment of this size,

1864
01:26:49,486 --> 01:26:51,552
we'll have to continue
this claims investigation.

1865
01:26:51,554 --> 01:26:52,654
Of course.

1866
01:26:52,656 --> 01:26:54,756
And, by law,
give all our findings

1867
01:26:54,758 --> 01:26:55,957
to the authorities.

1868
01:26:55,959 --> 01:26:57,726
Of course,
anything you need.

1869
01:26:57,728 --> 01:26:59,860
I just hope that my wife
is still alive.

1870
01:26:59,862 --> 01:27:00,865
I want her back.

1871
01:27:05,035 --> 01:27:06,668
Okey-dokey, then.

1872
01:27:06,670 --> 01:27:08,669
Obviously, if you
do hear from her...

1873
01:27:08,671 --> 01:27:10,439
- You'll be the first to know.
- Thank you so much!

1874
01:27:10,441 --> 01:27:12,477
Okay, thank you.
Thanks for the coffee.

1875
01:27:13,911 --> 01:27:15,010
Bye-bye.

1876
01:27:15,012 --> 01:27:16,013
- Thank you so much again.
- Thanks.

1877
01:27:17,613 --> 01:27:18,980
You knew that
she had a twin.

1878
01:27:18,982 --> 01:27:20,181
Did I?

1879
01:27:20,183 --> 01:27:21,917
Why didn't you?

1880
01:27:21,919 --> 01:27:23,185
You knew
and you didn't tell me.

1881
01:27:23,187 --> 01:27:24,389
Sean,

1882
01:27:25,155 --> 01:27:26,657
you sound crazy.

1883
01:27:28,090 --> 01:27:29,427
Take a Xanax.

1884
01:27:29,992 --> 01:27:31,892
Take two.

1885
01:27:31,894 --> 01:27:33,761
<i>Hi, moms. Stephanie here.</i>

1886
01:27:33,763 --> 01:27:36,198
<i>Today, we're talking about
tombstone tributes.</i>

1887
01:27:36,200 --> 01:27:37,798
<i>I want to thank Helen
from Missoula, Montana,</i>

1888
01:27:37,800 --> 01:27:38,934
<i>for the suggestions.</i>

1889
01:27:38,936 --> 01:27:41,101
<i>For thinking outside the box.</i>

1890
01:27:41,103 --> 01:27:44,705
<i>You know, it doesn't have
to just be flowers anymore.</i>

1891
01:27:44,707 --> 01:27:50,110
<i>I think any item that sparks
a fond memory is perfect.</i>

1892
01:27:50,112 --> 01:27:52,780
<i>Emily's favorite treat
was a dry gin martini</i>

1893
01:27:52,782 --> 01:27:54,048
<i>in the late afternoon.</i>

1894
01:27:54,050 --> 01:27:57,052
<i>I'm gonna make a couple
just like Emily used to.</i>

1895
01:27:57,054 --> 01:27:59,687
<i>Frozen gin, frozen glass,</i>

1896
01:27:59,689 --> 01:28:01,590
<i>generous twist.</i>

1897
01:28:01,592 --> 01:28:03,527
<i>I'm gonna head out there
a little later today.</i>

1898
01:28:04,628 --> 01:28:06,097
<i>Have a toast on her grave.</i>

1899
01:28:10,733 --> 01:28:12,637
Nice, big twist.
I taught you well.

1900
01:28:13,536 --> 01:28:14,972
Student's become
the master.

1901
01:28:15,638 --> 01:28:17,674
Ooh, wisdom.

1902
01:28:19,009 --> 01:28:20,941
Hey, give me that.

1903
01:28:20,943 --> 01:28:22,511
I don't know
what tricks you have

1904
01:28:22,513 --> 01:28:24,613
up those new
sleeves of yours.

1905
01:28:24,615 --> 01:28:26,248
You think
I poisoned both drinks?

1906
01:28:26,250 --> 01:28:27,585
That's not my style.

1907
01:28:28,151 --> 01:28:29,854
I don't even eat gluten.

1908
01:28:32,990 --> 01:28:34,592
- Want another?
- Please.

1909
01:28:36,093 --> 01:28:37,258
First, tell me why

1910
01:28:37,260 --> 01:28:38,927
you killed your father
and sister.

1911
01:28:38,929 --> 01:28:40,529
Okay, why don't we
first talk about

1912
01:28:40,531 --> 01:28:41,896
your son's real father?

1913
01:28:41,898 --> 01:28:44,699
Oh! Emily,
I hold all the cards here.

1914
01:28:44,701 --> 01:28:46,167
I wanna know
about your twin, Faith.

1915
01:28:46,169 --> 01:28:47,302
I'm not a twin.

1916
01:28:47,304 --> 01:28:49,136
Great, I know that you are.

1917
01:28:49,138 --> 01:28:50,805
We were triplets.

1918
01:28:50,807 --> 01:28:53,074
Faith, Hope, and Charity.
Charity was stillborn.

1919
01:28:53,076 --> 01:28:54,175
Mom thought we offed her

1920
01:28:54,177 --> 01:28:55,243
- in the womb.
- Hmm.

1921
01:28:55,245 --> 01:28:57,177
Dad believed her.

1922
01:28:57,179 --> 01:28:59,082
She's quite a woman,
your mother.

1923
01:29:00,217 --> 01:29:01,850
I had a nice afternoon
with Mags.

1924
01:29:01,852 --> 01:29:03,717
You met my mother?

1925
01:29:03,719 --> 01:29:05,819
She likes her martinis
even stronger than yours.

1926
01:29:05,821 --> 01:29:08,556
We had a little walk
down memory lane.

1927
01:29:08,558 --> 01:29:10,292
She's a cold woman, Em.

1928
01:29:10,294 --> 01:29:13,194
Bet you couldn't do
anything right in her eyes.

1929
01:29:13,196 --> 01:29:15,564
It was probably Faith's
idea to set the fire.

1930
01:29:15,566 --> 01:29:17,231
But then, all the bad ideas
were Faith's, weren't they?

1931
01:29:17,233 --> 01:29:19,266
- You don't know anything.
- Sure I do.

1932
01:29:19,268 --> 01:29:20,901
And I get it.

1933
01:29:20,903 --> 01:29:22,770
<i>You're 16.</i>

1934
01:29:22,772 --> 01:29:25,275
<i>It's that age
where you feel so trapped.</i>

1935
01:29:26,876 --> 01:29:29,613
<i>Then, if your mother always
had the biting comment...</i>

1936
01:29:35,952 --> 01:29:37,985
- Faith, it's over. Let's go!
- Dad! Dad!

1937
01:29:37,987 --> 01:29:40,221
- Dad! Don't touch me!
- It's not my fault!

1938
01:29:40,223 --> 01:29:42,324
<i>...I'm guessing your father
was more direct.</i>

1939
01:29:42,326 --> 01:29:44,258
MR. McLANDEN: Whore!

1940
01:29:44,260 --> 01:29:46,328
- Never again!
- Stop!

1941
01:29:46,330 --> 01:29:49,100
That's when you and Faith learned
to hit the reset button, right?

1942
01:29:50,968 --> 01:29:52,100
Burn, baby, burn.

1943
01:30:00,710 --> 01:30:01,943
<i>Why'd you leave each other?</i>

1944
01:30:01,945 --> 01:30:05,012
Well, we couldn't stay
together after the fire.

1945
01:30:05,014 --> 01:30:07,047
The cops were looking for
the big blonde arson twins.

1946
01:30:07,049 --> 01:30:08,753
<i>We were a walking sideshow.</i>

1947
01:30:09,920 --> 01:30:12,186
Fuck off!

1948
01:30:12,188 --> 01:30:14,855
We had to say goodbye,
so we did it with tattoos.

1949
01:30:14,857 --> 01:30:17,794
<i>Flames, and a little
something for Charity.</i>

1950
01:30:22,965 --> 01:30:24,733
We split up
in Corpus Christi.

1951
01:30:24,735 --> 01:30:25,867
She was gonna head
south to Mexico,

1952
01:30:25,869 --> 01:30:27,836
<i>I was gonna go north.</i>

1953
01:30:27,838 --> 01:30:29,003
<i>We set a time
and place to meet</i>

1954
01:30:29,005 --> 01:30:30,807
<i>after the smoke cleared.</i>

1955
01:30:31,907 --> 01:30:34,409
<i>But then,
she never showed up.</i>

1956
01:30:34,411 --> 01:30:36,847
<i>I was worried sick.
I waited for days.</i>

1957
01:30:37,647 --> 01:30:39,146
<i>But nothing.</i>

1958
01:30:39,148 --> 01:30:40,715
I thought maybe
this is my opportunity

1959
01:30:40,717 --> 01:30:41,850
to do it on my own.

1960
01:30:41,852 --> 01:30:43,150
She was always getting me
into trouble.

1961
01:30:43,152 --> 01:30:44,319
So I bought a one-way
ticket to New York

1962
01:30:44,321 --> 01:30:45,720
and never looked back.

1963
01:30:45,722 --> 01:30:46,820
Did you miss her?

1964
01:30:46,822 --> 01:30:47,888
Of course I missed her.

1965
01:30:47,890 --> 01:30:49,391
I wasn't whole without her.

1966
01:30:49,393 --> 01:30:51,292
But I couldn't go on like
that, I had to survive.

1967
01:30:51,294 --> 01:30:52,193
And it worked.

1968
01:30:52,195 --> 01:30:54,328
Yeah, my life in New York
fell into place.

1969
01:30:54,330 --> 01:30:57,164
I got a job,
worked my way up.

1970
01:30:57,166 --> 01:30:58,902
I met the perfect man.

1971
01:30:59,870 --> 01:31:01,735
Oh, you know
that part, though.

1972
01:31:01,737 --> 01:31:03,171
Then your sister calls.

1973
01:31:03,173 --> 01:31:04,405
Fucking Facebook.

1974
01:31:04,407 --> 01:31:06,740
- You had to see her.
- Yeah, of course I did.

1975
01:31:06,742 --> 01:31:09,944
So you fabricate
this trip to Miami,

1976
01:31:09,946 --> 01:31:11,245
meet up at the old camp.

1977
01:31:11,247 --> 01:31:13,150
Camp bunk four,
it was our happy place.

1978
01:31:15,786 --> 01:31:18,222
<i>It was the only place we could
escape our dad, really.</i>

1979
01:31:26,929 --> 01:31:28,430
<i>Must've been shocking</i>

1980
01:31:28,432 --> 01:31:30,201
<i>to see her
after all those years.</i>

1981
01:31:31,968 --> 01:31:34,836
<i>Yeah, it was like
looking in the mirror.</i>

1982
01:31:34,838 --> 01:31:37,337
Except at the sick life
she chose over me.

1983
01:31:37,339 --> 01:31:38,940
<i>What did she want?</i>

1984
01:31:38,942 --> 01:31:39,944
<i>Everything.</i>

1985
01:31:42,245 --> 01:31:43,845
Just gonna stand there?

1986
01:31:44,947 --> 01:31:46,381
You gotta have Faith.

1987
01:31:46,383 --> 01:31:48,783
I don't hear from you
for 14 years,

1988
01:31:48,785 --> 01:31:50,485
and now, here you are?

1989
01:31:50,487 --> 01:31:51,953
I'm out of cash.

1990
01:31:51,955 --> 01:31:52,957
Shocking.

1991
01:31:54,290 --> 01:31:55,959
The fuck did you say?

1992
01:31:58,862 --> 01:31:59,927
Nothing.

1993
01:31:59,929 --> 01:32:01,863
Get away
with it this time.

1994
01:32:01,865 --> 01:32:03,330
Okay, so, um...

1995
01:32:03,332 --> 01:32:04,899
- Now what?
- I don't know.

1996
01:32:04,901 --> 01:32:06,167
I didn't know
where to go.

1997
01:32:06,169 --> 01:32:08,168
When I call,
you act like a stranger.

1998
01:32:08,170 --> 01:32:10,038
Won't even let me
come meet your family.

1999
01:32:10,040 --> 01:32:11,905
What am I supposed
to say to them?

2000
01:32:11,907 --> 01:32:12,910
The truth?

2001
01:32:13,509 --> 01:32:15,776
Well, you may as well now

2002
01:32:15,778 --> 01:32:17,878
because I'm about
to tell the cops.

2003
01:32:17,880 --> 01:32:18,980
You're what?

2004
01:32:18,982 --> 01:32:21,382
I don't know
what else to do.

2005
01:32:21,384 --> 01:32:23,016
I don't have anything,

2006
01:32:23,018 --> 01:32:25,153
so I don't really have
anything to lose.

2007
01:32:25,155 --> 01:32:27,020
I'm gonna go tell them
everything we did.

2008
01:32:27,022 --> 01:32:28,890
And then we'll
go down together.

2009
01:32:28,892 --> 01:32:30,024
We can be together again.

2010
01:32:30,026 --> 01:32:31,825
I have a little boy now.

2011
01:32:31,827 --> 01:32:34,462
Yeah, I know. I saw that kid.
He's super cute.

2012
01:32:34,464 --> 01:32:35,997
Cut the shit, okay?

2013
01:32:35,999 --> 01:32:37,401
What do you
want from me?

2014
01:32:39,469 --> 01:32:40,834
I want a million bucks.

2015
01:32:40,836 --> 01:32:42,102
How am I supposed
to give you that?

2016
01:32:42,104 --> 01:32:43,337
You're rich
and famous now.

2017
01:32:43,339 --> 01:32:45,108
I can't give you
a million dollars.

2018
01:32:46,375 --> 01:32:47,941
You do seem
highly motivated.

2019
01:32:47,943 --> 01:32:49,843
I don't know
what it is, though.

2020
01:32:49,845 --> 01:32:51,011
It's your job,

2021
01:32:51,013 --> 01:32:52,946
probably your kid.

2022
01:32:52,948 --> 01:32:54,916
Don't talk about Nicky.

2023
01:32:54,918 --> 01:32:57,385
Yeah, I'll, um...

2024
01:32:57,387 --> 01:33:00,855
I'll sell the house. I'll
do whatever I need to do.

2025
01:33:00,857 --> 01:33:02,257
If I do this,
you can't tell anyone ever.

2026
01:33:02,259 --> 01:33:03,260
Do you understand?

2027
01:33:04,027 --> 01:33:05,959
Yeah, I get it.

2028
01:33:05,961 --> 01:33:07,995
I mean, I don't really get
the big deal about kids.

2029
01:33:07,997 --> 01:33:10,431
You could always
just make another kid.

2030
01:33:10,433 --> 01:33:12,801
You know that, right?

2031
01:33:12,803 --> 01:33:14,171
You can't make
another sister, though.

2032
01:33:16,005 --> 01:33:17,838
It's fucking hot.

2033
01:33:17,840 --> 01:33:19,974
Come on,
let's go swimming.

2034
01:33:19,976 --> 01:33:21,746
Remember?
Like we used to.

2035
01:33:23,013 --> 01:33:24,945
- You coming?
- Yeah.

2036
01:33:24,947 --> 01:33:26,182
Right behind you.

2037
01:33:37,093 --> 01:33:38,359
<i>How'd you
get her in the lake?</i>

2038
01:33:38,361 --> 01:33:40,028
<i>Fuck you.
I didn't kill my sister.</i>

2039
01:33:40,030 --> 01:33:41,064
<i>That was her idea.</i>

2040
01:33:49,039 --> 01:33:50,508
Come on, wimp.

2041
01:33:52,409 --> 01:33:54,609
What? I thought
you were the alpha now.

2042
01:33:54,611 --> 01:33:55,877
No?

2043
01:33:55,879 --> 01:33:57,515
I am the alpha,
God damn it.

2044
01:34:14,630 --> 01:34:17,297
You abandoned me.

2045
01:34:17,299 --> 01:34:19,534
We were supposed to be
a team, you and me.

2046
01:34:19,536 --> 01:34:20,635
Remember?

2047
01:34:20,637 --> 01:34:22,106
Yeah, I know we were.

2048
01:34:23,406 --> 01:34:25,976
But I just thought the only
chance we had was alone.

2049
01:34:27,076 --> 01:34:28,311
You were right.

2050
01:34:29,045 --> 01:34:30,581
I'm sorry, kid.

2051
01:34:35,251 --> 01:34:36,253
Me, too.

2052
01:35:32,107 --> 01:35:33,675
<i>I was so worried.</i>

2053
01:35:33,677 --> 01:35:36,880
I woke up the next morning.
I couldn't find her anywhere.

2054
01:35:38,548 --> 01:35:39,950
I never thought...

2055
01:35:41,718 --> 01:35:43,519
I never thought
she'd do that, you know?

2056
01:35:46,455 --> 01:35:49,289
When I found her body
in the lake, it was too late.

2057
01:35:49,291 --> 01:35:50,458
Lie.

2058
01:35:50,460 --> 01:35:51,525
You drowned her.

2059
01:35:51,527 --> 01:35:53,560
No, she killed herself.

2060
01:35:53,562 --> 01:35:55,195
I'm just
all that's left of her.

2061
01:35:55,197 --> 01:35:56,631
No, you're
a sister killer.

2062
01:35:56,633 --> 01:35:58,132
You're a brotherfucker.

2063
01:35:58,134 --> 01:35:59,400
Ooh!

2064
01:35:59,402 --> 01:36:00,968
What does Sean know?

2065
01:36:00,970 --> 01:36:02,071
Everything.

2066
01:36:02,973 --> 01:36:04,238
It was his idea.

2067
01:36:04,240 --> 01:36:06,106
I didn't know what to do
once I found the body.

2068
01:36:06,108 --> 01:36:08,409
He said maybe
this is our opportunity.

2069
01:36:08,411 --> 01:36:10,144
We could finally
get out of debt.

2070
01:36:10,146 --> 01:36:11,215
Flee the country.

2071
01:36:12,182 --> 01:36:13,614
Spend more time with Nicky.

2072
01:36:13,616 --> 01:36:15,382
He convinced me
we could pull it off.

2073
01:36:15,384 --> 01:36:17,251
That her DNA
would do the rest.

2074
01:36:17,253 --> 01:36:19,520
I don't believe you.
He grieved for you.

2075
01:36:19,522 --> 01:36:21,021
Oh, you believed that?

2076
01:36:21,023 --> 01:36:22,489
Aw, that was all an act.

2077
01:36:22,491 --> 01:36:24,191
You're a pathological liar.

2078
01:36:24,193 --> 01:36:25,495
Did Sean say that?

2079
01:36:27,330 --> 01:36:29,430
Cool.

2080
01:36:29,432 --> 01:36:31,635
I'm just gonna play you
this tune real quick.

2081
01:36:35,237 --> 01:36:37,538
- <i>Do you love her?</i>
- <i>No.</i>

2082
01:36:37,540 --> 01:36:38,873
<i>It was just sex.</i>

2083
01:36:38,875 --> 01:36:41,245
<i>Did you think of me
when you were fucking her?</i>

2084
01:36:41,777 --> 01:36:43,543
<i>Yes.</i>

2085
01:36:43,545 --> 01:36:45,279
<i>Do you love me
or not, baby?</i>

2086
01:36:45,281 --> 01:36:47,080
<i>Of course I do.</i>

2087
01:36:47,082 --> 01:36:49,050
<i>She doesn't mean
a thing to me.</i>

2088
01:36:49,052 --> 01:36:51,487
I'm sorry, baby. I know
you thought it was real.

2089
01:36:53,255 --> 01:36:55,390
But, hey,
look on the bright side.

2090
01:36:55,392 --> 01:36:57,592
Your website went viral,
thanks to me.

2091
01:36:57,594 --> 01:36:59,593
All this
for a little money?

2092
01:36:59,595 --> 01:37:02,797
A little $4 million.

2093
01:37:02,799 --> 01:37:05,565
That's not exactly
little, huh?

2094
01:37:05,567 --> 01:37:07,467
I was hiding out
till that money came in.

2095
01:37:07,469 --> 01:37:09,369
He was just gonna tie up
some loose ends.

2096
01:37:09,371 --> 01:37:11,071
Was I a loose end?

2097
01:37:11,073 --> 01:37:12,707
Well, he needed help
with Nicky.

2098
01:37:12,709 --> 01:37:14,508
You're so good
with those kids.

2099
01:37:14,510 --> 01:37:16,778
So what happens now?

2100
01:37:16,780 --> 01:37:19,247
I just want my kid.

2101
01:37:19,249 --> 01:37:20,748
You fucked up
my insurance plan.

2102
01:37:20,750 --> 01:37:22,617
The authorities
won't back down on that.

2103
01:37:22,619 --> 01:37:23,717
You can have Sean.
He's a piece of shit.

2104
01:37:23,719 --> 01:37:25,052
I don't even want him.

2105
01:37:25,054 --> 01:37:26,553
I don't want Sean.

2106
01:37:26,555 --> 01:37:28,025
Then I don't know,
I guess there's...

2107
01:37:29,526 --> 01:37:31,028
There's another way, but

2108
01:37:31,795 --> 01:37:34,127
sort of one mother
to another.

2109
01:37:38,500 --> 01:37:40,503
Sleeping like a log.

2110
01:38:08,164 --> 01:38:10,263
- Oh!
- What's going on?

2111
01:38:10,265 --> 01:38:12,402
They have a warrant.
I tried to call you.

2112
01:38:13,303 --> 01:38:15,302
Excuse me.
I'm Sean Townsend.

2113
01:38:15,304 --> 01:38:17,105
Look, I'm happy to comply
with anything you need.

2114
01:38:17,107 --> 01:38:19,440
But it would be nice
to have a heads-up.

2115
01:38:19,442 --> 01:38:20,842
This is an open
investigation.

2116
01:38:20,844 --> 01:38:23,147
You don't get to pencil us
in when it's convenient.

2117
01:38:30,286 --> 01:38:31,422
Hey.

2118
01:38:32,455 --> 01:38:33,654
Am I under arrest?

2119
01:38:33,656 --> 01:38:36,224
Oh, no, not yet.
The DA wants a slam dunk.

2120
01:38:36,226 --> 01:38:38,359
That's gonna be pretty hard
since I haven't done anything.

2121
01:38:38,361 --> 01:38:39,595
Did you know
your wife was alive?

2122
01:38:40,597 --> 01:38:41,729
Not until recently.

2123
01:38:41,731 --> 01:38:43,297
When?

2124
01:38:43,299 --> 01:38:44,632
She contacted me.

2125
01:38:44,634 --> 01:38:47,400
And you immediately notified
the authorities, right?

2126
01:38:47,402 --> 01:38:49,270
I can't discuss this
without my attorney.

2127
01:38:49,272 --> 01:38:51,338
You know what? You really are
a professor, aren't you?

2128
01:38:51,340 --> 01:38:53,173
Okay, we'll talk soon.

2129
01:38:53,175 --> 01:38:55,342
Oh, uh, if we need
to contact you,

2130
01:38:55,344 --> 01:38:57,414
will you be with your wife
or the best friend?

2131
01:38:59,448 --> 01:39:00,750
Somebody else?

2132
01:39:10,527 --> 01:39:12,193
I need a stiff drink.
Maybe some of your...

2133
01:39:12,195 --> 01:39:14,395
I'm sorry.
You can't come in.

2134
01:39:14,397 --> 01:39:16,564
What? Where's Nicky?

2135
01:39:16,566 --> 01:39:17,931
He's upstairs playing.

2136
01:39:17,933 --> 01:39:20,267
- You have to go.
- What are you talking about?

2137
01:39:20,269 --> 01:39:22,235
This is an ongoing
investigation, Sean.

2138
01:39:22,237 --> 01:39:23,404
For fuck's sake.

2139
01:39:23,406 --> 01:39:24,471
I can't let you
into this house

2140
01:39:24,473 --> 01:39:25,739
until this whole thing's
been solved.

2141
01:39:25,741 --> 01:39:26,940
She's gotten to you,
hasn't she?

2142
01:39:26,942 --> 01:39:28,409
This has nothing
to do with Emily.

2143
01:39:28,411 --> 01:39:30,944
It's got everything
to do with her.

2144
01:39:30,946 --> 01:39:32,547
She's gaslighting you.

2145
01:39:32,549 --> 01:39:34,481
You don't understand
how powerful she is.

2146
01:39:34,483 --> 01:39:36,684
No, I don't understand
anything right now.

2147
01:39:36,686 --> 01:39:38,218
Stephanie, don't do this.

2148
01:39:38,220 --> 01:39:40,156
Please don't make me
call the police.

2149
01:40:18,228 --> 01:40:21,328
<i>Stephanie,
please call me back.</i>

2150
01:40:21,330 --> 01:40:22,663
<i>I don't know
what's going on</i>

2151
01:40:22,665 --> 01:40:24,832
<i>or how this is
all going to turn out.</i>

2152
01:40:24,834 --> 01:40:26,499
<i>But you're a great mum,</i>

2153
01:40:26,501 --> 01:40:28,903
<i>and you taught me
how to be a better dad.</i>

2154
01:40:28,905 --> 01:40:31,806
<i>For that,
I'll always be grateful.</i>

2155
01:40:31,808 --> 01:40:36,310
<i>The truth is, I don't think
I ever knew my wife.</i>

2156
01:40:36,312 --> 01:40:38,215
<i>Or what she's capable of.</i>

2157
01:41:13,015 --> 01:41:14,748
<i>A shocking new development</i>

2158
01:41:14,750 --> 01:41:16,051
<i>in the Emily Nelson case,</i>

2159
01:41:16,053 --> 01:41:19,486
<i>which first went viral
on a popular Internet vlog.</i>

2160
01:41:19,488 --> 01:41:21,555
<i>The PR executive
who was believed dead</i>

2161
01:41:21,557 --> 01:41:22,957
<i>in Michigan has resurfaced.</i>

2162
01:41:22,959 --> 01:41:25,025
<i>And it appears
the body found in the lake</i>

2163
01:41:25,027 --> 01:41:27,360
<i>was that of Nelson's
estranged twin sister.</i>

2164
01:41:27,362 --> 01:41:29,562
<i>Nelson's husband,
Sean Townsend,</i>

2165
01:41:29,564 --> 01:41:31,966
<i>an abusive failed novelist
and English professor</i>

2166
01:41:31,968 --> 01:41:35,002
<i>allegedly forced her
to stage her own death</i>

2167
01:41:35,004 --> 01:41:35,970
<i>in order to collect</i>

2168
01:41:35,972 --> 01:41:38,004
<i>a $4 million
life insurance policy.</i>

2169
01:41:38,006 --> 01:41:39,140
<i>Nevertheless,</i>

2170
01:41:39,142 --> 01:41:41,775
<i>bail for Mr. Townsend
will be set today.</i>

2171
01:41:41,777 --> 01:41:42,944
<i>A British national,</i>

2172
01:41:42,946 --> 01:41:44,912
<i>Townsend faces deportation
if found guilty.</i>

2173
01:41:44,914 --> 01:41:46,846
<i>Although
an accomplice to fraud,</i>

2174
01:41:46,848 --> 01:41:49,016
<i>Ms. Nelson is complying
with the authorities</i>

2175
01:41:49,018 --> 01:41:50,654
<i>in exchange for clemency.</i>

2176
01:41:53,622 --> 01:41:54,890
Stephanie?

2177
01:41:58,827 --> 01:42:00,427
Where's Nicky?

2178
01:42:00,429 --> 01:42:02,499
Oh, he's at a friend's
house watching a movie.

2179
01:42:03,832 --> 01:42:06,003
I figured we needed some
Mommy and Daddy time.

2180
01:42:08,004 --> 01:42:09,973
Have you forgotten
me already?

2181
01:42:11,040 --> 01:42:12,743
You're impossible
to forget.

2182
01:42:13,442 --> 01:42:14,610
Thank you.

2183
01:42:19,948 --> 01:42:21,949
Oh, please, Sean,
I'm not gonna poison you.

2184
01:42:21,951 --> 01:42:24,718
If I wanted to get rid of you,
you'd already be dead.

2185
01:42:24,720 --> 01:42:26,522
You put those files
in my computer.

2186
01:42:27,122 --> 01:42:29,390
Yes, I did.

2187
01:42:29,392 --> 01:42:30,824
But I did have help
from a woman

2188
01:42:30,826 --> 01:42:32,695
who loves volunteering
for everything.

2189
01:42:33,562 --> 01:42:34,729
Stephanie.

2190
01:42:34,731 --> 01:42:37,364
She's not as sweet
as her snatch, is she?

2191
01:42:37,366 --> 01:42:39,100
Were you ever gonna tell me
you had a twin sister?

2192
01:42:39,102 --> 01:42:40,467
Wasn't your business.

2193
01:42:40,469 --> 01:42:41,769
I'm your husband!

2194
01:42:41,771 --> 01:42:43,037
You've been fucking
my best friend

2195
01:42:43,039 --> 01:42:44,704
in my house, but now
you're my husband?

2196
01:42:44,706 --> 01:42:45,873
Okay.

2197
01:42:45,875 --> 01:42:48,508
Then I should probably tell
you that we were triplets.

2198
01:42:48,510 --> 01:42:49,709
The details.

2199
01:42:49,711 --> 01:42:50,714
<i>Hi, moms!</i>

2200
01:42:51,380 --> 01:42:52,682
Stephanie here.

2201
01:42:53,816 --> 01:42:55,082
I wanna thank you
for all the love

2202
01:42:55,084 --> 01:42:56,516
and support
you've been sending me.

2203
01:42:56,518 --> 01:42:57,687
Means so much.

2204
01:42:58,454 --> 01:42:59,589
Um...

2205
01:43:00,889 --> 01:43:04,024
You know, as shocked
as you guys are

2206
01:43:04,026 --> 01:43:06,659
about these turns of events,

2207
01:43:06,661 --> 01:43:09,396
I can assure you, nobody
is more stunned than me.

2208
01:43:09,398 --> 01:43:10,765
<i>Emily had her secrets.</i>

2209
01:43:10,767 --> 01:43:11,998
<i>So did her husband.</i>

2210
01:43:12,000 --> 01:43:14,601
<i>Clearly, I was
the naive romantic</i>

2211
01:43:14,603 --> 01:43:16,470
<i>caught in the middle.</i>

2212
01:43:16,472 --> 01:43:19,105
<i>I love you guys.
I always will.</i>

2213
01:43:19,107 --> 01:43:20,041
<i>I hope you can forgive me</i>

2214
01:43:20,043 --> 01:43:21,609
<i>in advance
for what I have to do.</i>

2215
01:43:21,611 --> 01:43:24,414
<i>Moms, do everything yourself.</i>

2216
01:43:27,817 --> 01:43:29,016
Stephanie.

2217
01:43:29,018 --> 01:43:30,551
You shouldn't be here
right now.

2218
01:43:30,553 --> 01:43:32,619
I used to live here.
Remember?

2219
01:43:32,621 --> 01:43:34,057
- Don't make this any hard...
- Don't move.

2220
01:43:36,992 --> 01:43:38,092
Stephanie, please.

2221
01:43:38,094 --> 01:43:40,026
You don't even let the boys
play with squirt guns.

2222
01:43:40,028 --> 01:43:41,895
That was before you
told me you loved me,

2223
01:43:41,897 --> 01:43:43,730
and it turned out you were
laughing at me behind my back.

2224
01:43:43,732 --> 01:43:45,766
Stephanie, maybe we should
take it down a notch.

2225
01:43:45,768 --> 01:43:47,467
You used me.

2226
01:43:47,469 --> 01:43:49,035
You used me, too.

2227
01:43:49,037 --> 01:43:51,105
But you had me
making you dinner,

2228
01:43:51,107 --> 01:43:54,041
watching your kid,
and sucking your dick.

2229
01:43:54,043 --> 01:43:55,909
I had no idea
that she was still alive.

2230
01:43:55,911 --> 01:43:57,043
Stop lying.

2231
01:43:57,045 --> 01:43:58,812
Okay, you guys,
I think we

2232
01:43:58,814 --> 01:44:00,547
should just sit down
and talk this out.

2233
01:44:00,549 --> 01:44:03,117
Emily, you sit down.
You hated Stephanie.

2234
01:44:03,119 --> 01:44:05,519
You used to watch her vlog
and rip her apart.

2235
01:44:05,521 --> 01:44:07,087
All I wanted
was to be your friend.

2236
01:44:07,089 --> 01:44:08,823
You were.

2237
01:44:08,825 --> 01:44:10,024
And then you
fucked my husband

2238
01:44:10,026 --> 01:44:10,992
and my insurance plan.

2239
01:44:10,994 --> 01:44:13,927
Don't blame her.
This is so typical of you.

2240
01:44:13,929 --> 01:44:16,529
Sean, I was just trying to get
us out of crushing fucking debt.

2241
01:44:16,531 --> 01:44:19,199
Oh, yeah. Maybe if you had the
good sense to give me a call,

2242
01:44:19,201 --> 01:44:21,135
I could've helped you with
this little plot of yours.

2243
01:44:21,137 --> 01:44:22,235
Oh, please,
you haven't come up

2244
01:44:22,237 --> 01:44:23,503
with a decent plot
in 10 years.

2245
01:44:23,505 --> 01:44:24,904
Really? Right now?

2246
01:44:24,906 --> 01:44:27,608
Can I say something,
as the lady with the gun?

2247
01:44:27,610 --> 01:44:29,142
Nicky deserves better
than both of you.

2248
01:44:29,144 --> 01:44:30,511
Fuck you, I love my kid.

2249
01:44:30,513 --> 01:44:31,715
Shut up.

2250
01:44:33,014 --> 01:44:35,483
Stephanie, put down the gun.

2251
01:44:35,485 --> 01:44:36,917
You don't wanna do this.

2252
01:44:36,919 --> 01:44:38,789
I really do, though.

2253
01:44:41,022 --> 01:44:42,491
I loved you.

2254
01:44:43,893 --> 01:44:45,028
I loved you, too.

2255
01:44:47,830 --> 01:44:49,062
I think this is
the best thing.

2256
01:44:49,064 --> 01:44:50,465
Whoa.

2257
01:44:50,467 --> 01:44:52,932
Yeah, we could say he attacked us.
They'll believe us, you know?

2258
01:44:52,934 --> 01:44:55,668
No, no, you're not fucking serious.
You're not gonna kill him.

2259
01:44:55,670 --> 01:44:58,204
We're just gonna
send him to jail.

2260
01:44:58,206 --> 01:45:00,673
Are you serious?
Jail's enough for you?

2261
01:45:00,675 --> 01:45:02,877
- You don't need to kill him.
- Aren't you angry?

2262
01:45:02,879 --> 01:45:04,677
Don't you want revenge
for your sister?

2263
01:45:04,679 --> 01:45:07,547
Yeah, yes. But he didn't
technically kill her.

2264
01:45:07,549 --> 01:45:09,149
Then who did?

2265
01:45:09,151 --> 01:45:11,621
Because I don't buy
that it was an accident.

2266
01:45:14,189 --> 01:45:15,759
Screw this.

2267
01:45:18,160 --> 01:45:19,793
Oh, my God!

2268
01:45:19,795 --> 01:45:21,761
- Fuck.
- Oh, my God. Jesus.

2269
01:45:21,763 --> 01:45:23,696
Oh, my God. Um...

2270
01:45:23,698 --> 01:45:26,633
Oh, my God!
Shit! Is he really dead?

2271
01:45:26,635 --> 01:45:29,168
Sean? I'm sorry.
What do I do?

2272
01:45:29,170 --> 01:45:30,773
Do you put
pressure on it?

2273
01:45:31,674 --> 01:45:32,773
Do we call an ambulance?

2274
01:45:32,775 --> 01:45:35,175
Do I just let him die?
I mean...

2275
01:45:35,177 --> 01:45:36,976
He deserved it, right?

2276
01:45:36,978 --> 01:45:39,879
No, I killed her.
I killed my sister.

2277
01:45:39,881 --> 01:45:40,980
What?

2278
01:45:40,982 --> 01:45:42,751
Sean? Sean!

2279
01:45:43,085 --> 01:45:44,087
Get up.

2280
01:45:46,621 --> 01:45:48,288
Show's over, come on.

2281
01:45:48,290 --> 01:45:50,791
Seriously? Come on.
Get the fuck up. Hey!

2282
01:45:50,793 --> 01:45:52,258
You too, Brando.

2283
01:45:52,260 --> 01:45:53,660
Get up!

2284
01:45:53,662 --> 01:45:54,964
Fuck!

2285
01:45:59,201 --> 01:46:00,203
Wow.

2286
01:46:02,705 --> 01:46:04,837
That was extra.

2287
01:46:04,839 --> 01:46:07,007
I mean, obviously, I knew you
guys were up to something,

2288
01:46:07,009 --> 01:46:08,609
when I saw both the mics

2289
01:46:08,611 --> 01:46:10,778
that you had the cops
plant in here.

2290
01:46:10,780 --> 01:46:12,712
You clearly wanted
a confession out of me,

2291
01:46:12,714 --> 01:46:14,280
so you could clear
Sean's name.

2292
01:46:14,282 --> 01:46:17,784
But that was a good way
to go about it.

2293
01:46:17,786 --> 01:46:19,720
And where you messed up,
though, baby girl,

2294
01:46:19,722 --> 01:46:21,221
is thinking
that I would confess

2295
01:46:21,223 --> 01:46:23,356
to protect that
fucking yeast infection.

2296
01:46:23,358 --> 01:46:25,225
- Really?
- All right.

2297
01:46:25,227 --> 01:46:27,293
Come on, you gotta know
better than that.

2298
01:46:27,295 --> 01:46:30,763
- Oh.
- But then you came in all emotional with the gun,

2299
01:46:30,765 --> 01:46:33,601
and that was...
That was convincing.

2300
01:46:33,603 --> 01:46:34,767
Yeah.

2301
01:46:34,769 --> 01:46:35,769
It was very cinematic.

2302
01:46:35,771 --> 01:46:37,971
I don't even know
where you find this shit.

2303
01:46:37,973 --> 01:46:39,373
You're really amazing.

2304
01:46:39,375 --> 01:46:40,911
Thanks. That means a lot.

2305
01:46:41,943 --> 01:46:43,979
But you did
confess, Emily.

2306
01:46:44,746 --> 01:46:47,750
Oh. Yeah. Um...

2307
01:46:49,050 --> 01:46:52,386
I did. But I cut
these first, though.

2308
01:46:52,388 --> 01:46:54,654
For our
friendship bracelets.

2309
01:46:54,656 --> 01:46:56,356
One for you!

2310
01:46:56,358 --> 01:46:59,726
That is disappointing.

2311
01:46:59,728 --> 01:47:03,062
Oh! My God! Look what I found.

2312
01:47:04,165 --> 01:47:08,202
Okay. You can't shoot us.
The police are outside.

2313
01:47:08,204 --> 01:47:10,404
No, they're not.

2314
01:47:10,406 --> 01:47:12,739
Hey,
cops, Stephanie here.

2315
01:47:12,741 --> 01:47:13,807
Change of plans.

2316
01:47:13,809 --> 01:47:16,043
I'm meeting Emily and Sean
at Darren's house now.

2317
01:47:16,045 --> 01:47:17,144
I'll see you there.

2318
01:47:17,146 --> 01:47:18,846
You sent them
to Darren's house?

2319
01:47:18,848 --> 01:47:21,047
It's a virus.

2320
01:47:21,049 --> 01:47:23,316
String theory.
String theory, isn't it?

2321
01:47:23,318 --> 01:47:26,285
Hands up! Weapons down!

2322
01:47:26,287 --> 01:47:27,954
No, I have
a prescription for that.

2323
01:47:27,956 --> 01:47:29,690
I have ocular pressure!

2324
01:47:29,692 --> 01:47:31,158
Come on, I've been
on the run for 10 years.

2325
01:47:31,160 --> 01:47:33,060
You think I don't know
how to manipulate the system?

2326
01:47:33,062 --> 01:47:35,029
So you're gonna kill us?

2327
01:47:35,031 --> 01:47:36,997
Well, what the fuck else
am I supposed to do?

2328
01:47:36,999 --> 01:47:38,666
You two will
clearly go to

2329
01:47:38,668 --> 01:47:40,300
extraordinary lengths
to take me down.

2330
01:47:40,302 --> 01:47:41,968
And you know too much.

2331
01:47:41,970 --> 01:47:44,171
So, I feel like
a murder-suicide

2332
01:47:44,173 --> 01:47:46,806
is the only fitting
end for you two.

2333
01:47:46,808 --> 01:47:47,874
And if you kill him,

2334
01:47:47,876 --> 01:47:50,209
I think our insurance
still covers that, right?

2335
01:47:50,211 --> 01:47:52,011
I mean, sort of perfect.

2336
01:47:52,013 --> 01:47:53,814
One door closes
and another one opens.

2337
01:47:53,816 --> 01:47:55,149
Thank you for that.

2338
01:47:55,151 --> 01:47:57,251
You always have been fucking
crazy, haven't you?

2339
01:47:57,253 --> 01:47:58,787
Have I?

2340
01:48:01,122 --> 01:48:02,922
Oh, shit. You're right.

2341
01:48:02,924 --> 01:48:04,793
God, you fucking...
You actually fucking shot me.

2342
01:48:05,728 --> 01:48:07,327
I'm gonna miss him.

2343
01:48:07,329 --> 01:48:08,331
Your turn.

2344
01:48:09,264 --> 01:48:11,364
Emily, come on.

2345
01:48:11,366 --> 01:48:13,132
You're not gonna kill me.

2346
01:48:13,134 --> 01:48:15,401
Oh, yeah. I killed my
dad and my sister,

2347
01:48:15,403 --> 01:48:19,105
but I could never kill my
husband-fucking best friend.

2348
01:48:19,107 --> 01:48:21,108
Am I really
your best friend?

2349
01:48:21,110 --> 01:48:23,276
You're not just saying
that for, you know...

2350
01:48:23,278 --> 01:48:25,078
No, no, I'm not
just saying that at all.

2351
01:48:25,080 --> 01:48:27,013
I get worried
that it's just me.

2352
01:48:27,015 --> 01:48:28,782
I know, sometimes
I was worried about that, too.

2353
01:48:30,119 --> 01:48:31,885
So hard to connect
with other moms.

2354
01:48:31,887 --> 01:48:33,953
And then when you have
a full-time job, it's...

2355
01:48:33,955 --> 01:48:35,489
Okay, okay,
don't pull that crap.

2356
01:48:35,491 --> 01:48:36,856
Being a mom
is a full-time job.

2357
01:48:36,858 --> 01:48:38,758
What I do is hard work.

2358
01:48:38,760 --> 01:48:40,127
And I have my vlog
on top of that,

2359
01:48:40,129 --> 01:48:41,861
and that's just getting
bigger and bigger.

2360
01:48:41,863 --> 01:48:43,931
If you came on the vlog,
that'd be so fun.

2361
01:48:43,933 --> 01:48:45,333
If you came on the vlog

2362
01:48:45,335 --> 01:48:48,235
and confessed to killing your father
and sister and held me at gunpoint,

2363
01:48:48,237 --> 01:48:49,869
I could probably hit
a million subscribers.

2364
01:48:49,871 --> 01:48:51,437
Aww. That
would've been great.

2365
01:48:51,439 --> 01:48:52,808
Why don't we
do that right now?

2366
01:48:53,075 --> 01:48:54,074
Hmm?

2367
01:48:54,076 --> 01:48:56,310
We're live streaming.
Did you not know that?

2368
01:48:56,312 --> 01:48:58,145
What the fuck
are you talking about?

2369
01:48:58,147 --> 01:48:59,683
God, that's so rude,
I'm sorry.

2370
01:49:00,316 --> 01:49:01,918
Wave hi to the moms!

2371
01:49:03,119 --> 01:49:05,052
<i>This little gadget. Boop!</i>

2372
01:49:05,054 --> 01:49:07,157
Yeah. They make nanny cams
so small these days.

2373
01:49:09,258 --> 01:49:10,326
Brotherfucker!

2374
01:49:13,228 --> 01:49:14,828
Emily!

2375
01:49:14,830 --> 01:49:16,363
Emily, stop!

2376
01:49:16,365 --> 01:49:19,266
Emily, you can't outrun this!
Don't do this to Nicky.

2377
01:49:19,268 --> 01:49:20,904
Come on, you're
still his mom.

2378
01:49:24,106 --> 01:49:25,108
Yeah, I am.

2379
01:49:26,107 --> 01:49:27,476
But you sure
as shit won't be.

2380
01:49:35,183 --> 01:49:36,883
America's hybrids.

2381
01:49:36,885 --> 01:49:38,987
Silent, but deadly.

2382
01:49:43,025 --> 01:49:44,891
I saw you on the vlog.

2383
01:49:44,893 --> 01:49:48,127
You fuck with one of the moms,
you fuck with us all.

2384
01:49:49,264 --> 01:49:50,834
Oh! Emily.

2385
01:49:51,567 --> 01:49:53,833
Stop! Emily.

2386
01:49:53,835 --> 01:49:56,102
This looks
super painful.

2387
01:49:56,104 --> 01:49:57,303
Now, sweetie.

2388
01:49:57,305 --> 01:50:00,007
Stop. You've just
been hit by a car.

2389
01:50:00,009 --> 01:50:01,440
Don't do this.

2390
01:50:01,442 --> 01:50:03,812
I'm getting worried
about your knees right now.

2391
01:50:04,580 --> 01:50:06,249
Just relax.

2392
01:50:11,586 --> 01:50:13,553
I'm sorry.

2393
01:50:13,555 --> 01:50:15,288
I'm not sorry. Oh!

2394
01:50:15,290 --> 01:50:16,759
I'm still working on that.

2395
01:50:21,263 --> 01:50:22,895
Hi, moms! Stephanie here.

2396
01:50:22,897 --> 01:50:24,498
We have very
exciting news today

2397
01:50:24,500 --> 01:50:27,601
because we signed up
our one millionth subscriber,

2398
01:50:27,603 --> 01:50:31,137
Mrs. Carol Findley
of Ames, Iowa!

2399
01:50:31,139 --> 01:50:33,974
Thank you
for joining us, Carol.

2400
01:50:33,976 --> 01:50:36,209
You should know,
as our newest friend,

2401
01:50:36,211 --> 01:50:38,377
that in addition to my usual
helpful tips and recipes,

2402
01:50:38,379 --> 01:50:41,248
I now take on
unsolved mysteries.

2403
01:50:41,250 --> 01:50:43,115
Because it turns out
I have a nose

2404
01:50:43,117 --> 01:50:45,586
for sniffing out
the freshest basil

2405
01:50:45,588 --> 01:50:48,055
and criminals who thought
they got away with it.

2406
01:50:48,057 --> 01:50:49,590
<i>So if you have a cold case</i>

2407
01:50:49,592 --> 01:50:51,592
<i>or a mystery that
needs to be unraveled,</i>

2408
01:50:51,594 --> 01:50:52,560
<i>you just drop me a line.</i>

2409
01:50:52,562 --> 01:50:54,227
<i>That includes
you now, Carol,</i>

2410
01:50:54,229 --> 01:50:56,195
<i>because you're part
of the family.</i>

2411
01:50:56,197 --> 01:50:58,498
<i>For now, we're
gonna be talking</i>

2412
01:50:58,500 --> 01:50:59,932
<i>about my favorite cold soup,</i>

2413
01:50:59,934 --> 01:51:01,534
<i>gazpacho!</i>

2414
01:51:01,536 --> 01:51:02,535
<i>Which is normally gross, but
we're not gonna make it gross.</i>

2415
01:51:02,537 --> 01:51:04,136
<i>Right, guys?
It's gonna be great.</i>

2416
01:51:49,684 --> 01:51:51,955
In your ass!

2417
01:51:58,634 --> 01:52:03,634
Subtitles by explosiveskull
Resynced by Cullyn