1
00:00:02,228 --> 00:00:04,003
♪ Si te hicieron daño ♪
2
00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:05,746
♪ Ven pa darte tu remedio ♪
3
00:00:05,823 --> 00:00:07,489
♪ No perdamos tiempo ♪
4
00:00:07,567 --> 00:00:11,402
♪ Vamos a montarnos en esta noa
que está heavy, heavy ♪
5
00:00:11,404 --> 00:00:14,572
You know when you're watching
a romantic comedy
6
00:00:14,574 --> 00:00:16,090
or reading a romance novel
7
00:00:16,166 --> 00:00:20,427
or, in my case, reading the
CliffsNotes to a romance novel,
8
00:00:20,504 --> 00:00:22,596
and the anticipation
builds and builds
9
00:00:22,673 --> 00:00:24,582
to that one special moment
10
00:00:24,584 --> 00:00:27,342
where everything magically
falls into place
11
00:00:27,420 --> 00:00:29,587
and those characters
you have been rooting for
12
00:00:29,589 --> 00:00:31,589
finally get together?
13
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Well, for me,
this is that moment.
14
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Hey, bae.
15
00:00:35,762 --> 00:00:36,777
Hey.
16
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Yeah, that's right.
17
00:00:40,266 --> 00:00:42,283
We are officially
baes now --
18
00:00:42,359 --> 00:00:44,410
two weeks
and going strong.
19
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Zoey: I mean, we've had
some ups and downs.
20
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♪ Dale, pégate ♪
21
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♪ Que aquí se vale todo, todo,
todo, todo, todo ♪
22
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Aaron,
as much as I love you,
23
00:00:54,781 --> 00:00:56,297
I can't start our story
like this.
24
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I love you, too.
25
00:00:58,618 --> 00:01:00,284
I want our story to start now.
Like...right now.
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00:01:00,286 --> 00:01:02,636
♪ Vamos a montarnos en esta noa
que está heavy, heavy ♪
27
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[ Cellphone chimes ]
Oh.
28
00:01:05,215 --> 00:01:06,791
[ Cellphone bloops ]
29
00:01:06,793 --> 00:01:09,217
[ Gasps ]
Aar Bear, they're here.
30
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We've talked about this.
Hmm?
31
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We're not gonna make "Aar Bear"
a thing, right?
32
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Right.
Of course not, Aar Bear.
Right.
33
00:01:13,724 --> 00:01:16,058
Okay, I am so sorry
for that one.
34
00:01:16,135 --> 00:01:17,802
Last time, I promise.
Let's go!
35
00:01:17,804 --> 00:01:20,988
♪ I said, "Hasta luego,
mami, fuego" ♪
36
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♪ Pipe me down, he bilingual,
daddy leggo ♪
37
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♪ Yo quiero ♪
38
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♪ And he said, "Ay, mami,
me vuelves loco" ♪
39
00:01:25,995 --> 00:01:27,736
♪ I bad lil' mami like soca ♪
40
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Zoey: Since this was the summer
before our senior year
41
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and our chances to make those
42
00:01:32,819 --> 00:01:34,093
special college moments
together
43
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would be coming to an end,
44
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I wanted to go big --
45
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extra big, grande even --
46
00:01:41,344 --> 00:01:43,769
by organizing a weekend
for all of us
47
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to drink, bond, and make
new memories in Mexico.
48
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♪ Know what you like,
muy attractivo ♪
49
00:01:48,835 --> 00:01:54,672
♪
50
00:01:54,674 --> 00:01:57,783
Alright, welcome shots this way,
everybody.
51
00:01:57,860 --> 00:01:59,952
Okay, guys,
glasses up.
52
00:02:00,029 --> 00:02:02,788
In the spirit
of us being together
53
00:02:02,865 --> 00:02:04,849
and getting back
to our freshman days
54
00:02:04,851 --> 00:02:08,443
of all love, zero drama,
loads of fun,
55
00:02:08,521 --> 00:02:10,445
this weekend, I have planned
nonstop activities
56
00:02:10,523 --> 00:02:12,206
from sunrise to sunset!
57
00:02:12,282 --> 00:02:13,040
Can I get an "olé"?!
58
00:02:13,117 --> 00:02:14,875
Olé, baby.
59
00:02:14,952 --> 00:02:15,860
Thanks, babe.
But anyone else?
60
00:02:15,862 --> 00:02:17,044
Olé?
61
00:02:19,957 --> 00:02:22,791
Olé?
62
00:02:22,869 --> 00:02:24,459
Yeah, no,
we're really not
63
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trying to be around you
like that.
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Mnh-mnh.
Oh.
65
00:02:27,464 --> 00:02:28,296
-Hmm.
-Ooh!
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♪
67
00:02:32,970 --> 00:02:36,897
No me gusta this moment.
68
00:02:36,974 --> 00:02:39,658
♪ Watch out, world,
I'm grown now ♪
69
00:02:39,735 --> 00:02:42,219
♪ I'm grown ♪
70
00:02:42,221 --> 00:02:43,812
♪ Learn something new
every day ♪
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00:02:43,890 --> 00:02:47,241
♪ I don't know,
so I'mma feel my way ♪
72
00:02:47,317 --> 00:02:49,818
♪ Got the weight of the world
on me ♪
73
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♪ But no regrets,
this is what I say ♪
74
00:02:52,064 --> 00:02:56,008
♪ Watch out, world,
I'm grown now ♪
75
00:02:56,085 --> 00:02:58,068
♪ I'm grown ♪
♪ You can tell me ♪
76
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♪ My heart beating so loud ♪
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♪ Mama, look, I'm grown now ♪
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♪ I'm grown ♪
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Look, Zo,
it's nothing personal.
80
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But, you know,
on the car ride here,
81
00:03:13,586 --> 00:03:14,919
after we decided
that Dave Chappelle
82
00:03:14,921 --> 00:03:17,922
and Bokeem Woodbine are
pretty much the same person,
83
00:03:17,924 --> 00:03:19,532
we also decided that nobody
should feel obligated
84
00:03:19,608 --> 00:03:20,682
to entertain the other
85
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and be attached at the hip
all weekend.
86
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Right, but this is also
a group trip,
87
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which means we do
group activities.
88
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I mean, I even have
a mariachi band coming later.
89
00:03:28,935 --> 00:03:30,951
Do you know how lucky
we are to have
90
00:03:31,028 --> 00:03:32,360
the Hernandez Hermanas Trio?
91
00:03:32,438 --> 00:03:34,380
Did we get them?
Yes.
92
00:03:34,457 --> 00:03:35,881
They only play cartel weddings
and the Univision Awards.
93
00:03:35,958 --> 00:03:37,032
And as much as
I'd be honored
94
00:03:37,109 --> 00:03:39,610
to get it crackin'
to "La Cucaracha,"
95
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the thing is,
we all just want to chill
96
00:03:41,113 --> 00:03:42,204
and do our own thing
separately,
97
00:03:42,281 --> 00:03:44,039
a "you do you" weekend.
98
00:03:44,116 --> 00:03:46,283
But what fun is
a "you do you" weekend?
99
00:03:46,285 --> 00:03:47,843
I want us to do each other.
100
00:03:50,289 --> 00:03:51,789
I heard it.
I heard it.
101
00:03:51,791 --> 00:03:53,307
Mm, I don't know
if you've noticed,
102
00:03:53,383 --> 00:03:55,550
but I'm here vacationing
with my ex.
103
00:03:55,628 --> 00:03:57,236
And, normally, Sky would be here
as a buffer,
104
00:03:57,313 --> 00:03:59,054
but she's still in Tokyo.
105
00:03:59,131 --> 00:04:01,574
So, obviously, I would like to
avoid the group activities.
106
00:04:01,650 --> 00:04:04,318
I mean,
my ex is here, too.
107
00:04:04,394 --> 00:04:05,727
Yeah, but you and Luca
are both weird as hell.
108
00:04:05,805 --> 00:04:07,488
Yeah, a truer statement
has never been said.
109
00:04:07,564 --> 00:04:09,748
And, honestly, though, I just
need to, like, clear my head,
110
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and I have to stop
obsessing over Phil,
111
00:04:12,069 --> 00:04:13,419
because the dude seriously
has yet to respond
112
00:04:13,496 --> 00:04:16,830
to a single text since I told
him that he has a daughter.
113
00:04:16,907 --> 00:04:17,923
Oof!
A White deadbeat daddy
114
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:21,076
definitely trumps
a Black ex on vacay.
115
00:04:21,153 --> 00:04:22,152
Oh, you do you, girl.
Thank you.
116
00:04:22,154 --> 00:04:24,597
And, Ana, you have been
awfully quiet.
117
00:04:24,673 --> 00:04:26,081
What's your
"you do you" excuse?
118
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Uh, you know, I personally
would rather use this time
119
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to, uh, to --
to reconnect with Javi.
120
00:04:34,166 --> 00:04:35,833
I haven't seen him since
he went home two weeks ago.
121
00:04:35,835 --> 00:04:38,260
And F.Y.I., he's landing here
in a couple hours.
122
00:04:38,337 --> 00:04:40,170
Yay!
Surprise!
123
00:04:40,172 --> 00:04:42,006
I'm sorry.
He's -- Javi's coming here?
124
00:04:42,008 --> 00:04:43,949
Yeah.
Well, I thought you thought
125
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that he was cheating on you
with "Somebody."
126
00:04:45,845 --> 00:04:46,619
-Oh, that part.
-Yes.
127
00:04:46,695 --> 00:04:48,028
Right.
That was the old me.
128
00:04:48,105 --> 00:04:51,957
I've since decided to take
a more mature approach.
129
00:04:52,034 --> 00:04:53,626
Yeah, no more --
no more snooping.
130
00:04:53,702 --> 00:04:56,203
Oh.
Yeah, no, I'm done.
131
00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:58,797
Okay, fine. I couldn't get into
his dumb-ass tablet.
132
00:04:58,874 --> 00:05:00,691
But you know what?
I really took this as a sign
133
00:05:00,693 --> 00:05:02,543
to just let go
and let God.
134
00:05:02,619 --> 00:05:04,878
-Hmm.
-Well, the point is, Zoey,
135
00:05:04,955 --> 00:05:06,805
we all just have so much
going on in our lives,
136
00:05:06,882 --> 00:05:08,140
and we want to use
this trip to reset.
137
00:05:08,217 --> 00:05:10,125
And as grateful
as we are to you
138
00:05:10,202 --> 00:05:11,218
for all the thoughtful
planning...
139
00:05:11,295 --> 00:05:12,478
Mm-hmm.
...we just want to do us.
140
00:05:12,555 --> 00:05:13,646
Can I get an "olé"?!
141
00:05:13,722 --> 00:05:15,372
-Olé!
-Olé!
142
00:05:15,374 --> 00:05:16,482
-Olé.
-Okay, love you.
143
00:05:16,559 --> 00:05:17,558
-Bye, Zo-Zo.
-Love you.
144
00:05:17,634 --> 00:05:19,209
-Bye.
-Bye.
145
00:05:19,211 --> 00:05:20,653
[ Sighs ]
146
00:05:20,729 --> 00:05:22,546
What are you guys doing?
147
00:05:22,548 --> 00:05:23,489
You okay?
148
00:05:23,566 --> 00:05:25,807
Oh, I'm great, actually.
149
00:05:25,885 --> 00:05:27,642
See, they think they want
150
00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:29,144
nothing to do with
my little weekend,
151
00:05:29,221 --> 00:05:30,904
but they're gonna play with me
whether they like it or not.
152
00:05:30,981 --> 00:05:33,982
Well, I'll play with you
whether you like it or not.
153
00:05:34,060 --> 00:05:35,225
Yeah, no,
that didn't ring right.
154
00:05:35,227 --> 00:05:37,503
Um,
I mean like more of a, uh,
155
00:05:37,580 --> 00:05:38,896
consensual, respectful,
a lot of eye contact.
156
00:05:38,898 --> 00:05:39,913
You know what I mean?
157
00:05:39,990 --> 00:05:41,582
Uh, never mind.
158
00:05:41,658 --> 00:05:43,325
Just I think it's best whenever
you let me know that --
159
00:05:43,402 --> 00:05:44,843
that you're in the mood.
Then I'll be in the mood.
160
00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:47,162
We can be in the mood.
161
00:05:47,239 --> 00:05:49,239
Yeah, and these I brought
for you, so --
162
00:05:49,241 --> 00:05:50,090
What'd you say?
You're in the mood?
163
00:05:50,167 --> 00:05:57,931
♪
164
00:05:58,008 --> 00:06:00,359
Sun block?
It's SPF 70.
165
00:06:00,436 --> 00:06:02,528
No, I'm Black, man.
166
00:06:02,605 --> 00:06:04,512
Having melanin does not
prevent skin cancer.
167
00:06:04,590 --> 00:06:06,256
You know my buddy La'Rance?
168
00:06:06,258 --> 00:06:08,534
He's very Black
and very sick.
169
00:06:08,611 --> 00:06:10,536
I'm also very Black
and very sick.
170
00:06:10,613 --> 00:06:12,262
Of you, man.
171
00:06:12,264 --> 00:06:14,281
Oh, wait.
172
00:06:14,358 --> 00:06:16,542
I know when I see
a man suffering.
173
00:06:16,619 --> 00:06:18,435
Heidi broke my heart
when she dumped me, too.
174
00:06:18,437 --> 00:06:19,603
This is about Jazz.
175
00:06:19,605 --> 00:06:20,938
It's not about Jazz.
176
00:06:20,940 --> 00:06:23,549
It's definitely
about Jazz.
177
00:06:23,626 --> 00:06:26,293
Mind hitting my back?
178
00:06:26,370 --> 00:06:28,612
Vivek, I'm not rubbing lotion
on your back, man.
179
00:06:28,614 --> 00:06:30,556
Yo, why are you
even here?
180
00:06:30,633 --> 00:06:32,391
Shouldn't you be back in Cali
after your little drug bust?
181
00:06:32,468 --> 00:06:34,560
Actually, I'm good.
182
00:06:34,637 --> 00:06:36,061
I got that lawyer who defends
all the revenge-porn dudes.
183
00:06:36,138 --> 00:06:39,306
-Here you are.
-Awful person.
184
00:06:39,383 --> 00:06:41,125
Definitely going to hell.
Definitely gets results.
185
00:06:41,127 --> 00:06:43,143
Server: And for you, sir.
Hey.
186
00:06:43,220 --> 00:06:45,053
Anyway, he told me
since I'm not a flight risk
187
00:06:45,131 --> 00:06:46,964
and I paid such a high bond
188
00:06:46,966 --> 00:06:49,316
to enjoy my downtime
before my court date,
189
00:06:49,393 --> 00:06:51,744
when we show them
how justice is served.
190
00:06:51,820 --> 00:06:53,579
So, for now, come on.
191
00:06:53,656 --> 00:06:56,306
A quick toast
to doing us.
192
00:06:56,308 --> 00:06:57,565
L'chaim!
193
00:06:57,643 --> 00:06:59,977
Hey-oh!
194
00:06:59,979 --> 00:07:03,405
♪
195
00:07:03,482 --> 00:07:07,484
Although my crew insisted on
a "you do you" weekend,
196
00:07:07,486 --> 00:07:10,003
I knew there was one thing
that would let us do us
197
00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:13,098
before we went our
separate ways for the night.
198
00:07:13,175 --> 00:07:15,676
A good old-fashioned pregame.
199
00:07:15,752 --> 00:07:17,344
♪ No one else gonna
get it like that ♪
200
00:07:17,421 --> 00:07:18,771
♪ So why argue? ♪
201
00:07:18,847 --> 00:07:20,497
♪ You yell ♪
202
00:07:20,499 --> 00:07:21,774
♪ But you take me back ♪
203
00:07:21,850 --> 00:07:24,259
With everyone in a good mood
204
00:07:24,336 --> 00:07:26,094
thanks to the copious
amounts of alcohol,
205
00:07:26,172 --> 00:07:28,763
I figured out a fun way
to keep the party going.
206
00:07:28,841 --> 00:07:30,098
♪ Pretty young thing
want that OG crack ♪
207
00:07:30,176 --> 00:07:34,178
A friendly little game
of "Most Likely To."
208
00:07:34,180 --> 00:07:35,437
♪ Do the D'Ussé with
a touch of DeLeón ♪
209
00:07:35,514 --> 00:07:38,699
♪
210
00:07:38,775 --> 00:07:41,518
Most likely to join
the mile-high club.
211
00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:42,853
[ Chuckles ] Me.
212
00:07:42,855 --> 00:07:45,022
I mean, obviously.
I did it on the way here.
213
00:07:45,024 --> 00:07:50,027
F.Y.I., altitude does
some weird stuff to your nuts,
214
00:07:50,029 --> 00:07:52,137
like swelling and such.
215
00:07:52,214 --> 00:07:54,198
Okay, I am up.
216
00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:56,550
Go get 'em, babe.
Scusi.
217
00:07:56,626 --> 00:07:57,050
Sorry, sorry.
Vivek: That was
the predetermined order.
218
00:07:57,127 --> 00:07:57,634
[ Humming ]
219
00:08:01,131 --> 00:08:02,147
And I think I'm just gonna
choose another one.
220
00:08:02,224 --> 00:08:03,298
Unh-unh-unh-unh-unh!
No, no, no.
221
00:08:03,375 --> 00:08:05,726
You pick it, you read it.
House rules.
222
00:08:05,802 --> 00:08:06,393
Come on.
No, do I really --
223
00:08:06,470 --> 00:08:08,654
Thank you.
224
00:08:08,731 --> 00:08:11,473
Mm!
"Who's most likely to cheat?"
225
00:08:11,550 --> 00:08:12,232
Now I see why
you wanted to cop out.
226
00:08:12,309 --> 00:08:14,309
No, no.
227
00:08:14,386 --> 00:08:15,494
Because i-it's not even
like that.
228
00:08:15,571 --> 00:08:17,721
Theoretically,
I didn't cheat on Rochelle.
229
00:08:17,723 --> 00:08:19,723
Aaron did.
Really, Zoey?
230
00:08:19,725 --> 00:08:21,908
What --
That's just bad sportsmanship.
Come on.
231
00:08:21,985 --> 00:08:23,243
No, babe, it's not even
like that.
232
00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:24,837
She came for me.
I wanted to clarify.
233
00:08:24,913 --> 00:08:25,987
I wasn't even
coming for you like that.
234
00:08:26,065 --> 00:08:27,397
I was actually referring
to the time
235
00:08:27,399 --> 00:08:29,174
you cheated on your midterm
and almost got expelled,
236
00:08:29,251 --> 00:08:31,918
but, you know [chuckles]
outing your man works too.
237
00:08:31,995 --> 00:08:33,570
That's crazy.
When I heard "cheating,"
238
00:08:33,572 --> 00:08:34,662
my mind immediately
went to Jazz.
239
00:08:34,740 --> 00:08:35,739
Pff!
Preach!
240
00:08:35,741 --> 00:08:37,407
[ Laughter ]
241
00:08:37,409 --> 00:08:40,168
Seriously, do not make me
come for you for real,
242
00:08:40,246 --> 00:08:42,504
because we all know
who would be most likely
243
00:08:42,581 --> 00:08:44,081
to accuse someone of cheating
when they really didn't.
244
00:08:44,083 --> 00:08:46,917
No, no, no. We all know who
that really is, right?
245
00:08:46,919 --> 00:08:51,104
Ana, "Somebody."
246
00:08:51,181 --> 00:08:52,364
What's she talking about?
247
00:08:52,441 --> 00:08:55,367
Nothing.
She's postpartum.
248
00:08:55,444 --> 00:08:56,518
Honestly, Nomi?
You really want to go there?
249
00:08:56,595 --> 00:08:58,704
Just lighten up.
It's a game, okay?
250
00:08:58,781 --> 00:08:59,521
We're just, like,
having fun.
251
00:08:59,598 --> 00:09:00,614
Oh. Okay.
252
00:09:00,690 --> 00:09:02,541
Well, I get it.
Okay.
253
00:09:02,618 --> 00:09:04,692
So then I have one.
254
00:09:04,770 --> 00:09:07,454
Alright,
who is such an ice queen,
255
00:09:07,531 --> 00:09:08,789
she is most likely to be
a single mom
256
00:09:08,865 --> 00:09:10,290
for the rest of her life?
No.
257
00:09:10,367 --> 00:09:12,367
-Oh.
-[ Whistles ] Oh!
258
00:09:12,444 --> 00:09:15,128
[Bleep] you.
259
00:09:15,205 --> 00:09:16,963
See?
You happy now?
260
00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:18,115
Your smart-ass comment
ruined the vibe,
261
00:09:18,117 --> 00:09:19,449
just like you ruined
our relationship.
262
00:09:19,451 --> 00:09:20,893
I ruined the relationship,
but not you trying to
263
00:09:20,969 --> 00:09:24,471
get friendly with the hurdle
jumper's nut-sack, right?
264
00:09:24,548 --> 00:09:26,381
-She belongs to the streets!
-Oh, indeed.
265
00:09:26,458 --> 00:09:27,733
Oh, was that you, Luca?
266
00:09:27,810 --> 00:09:31,295
Because last time I checked,
you should be worried about
267
00:09:31,297 --> 00:09:33,297
your weird-ass open relationship
with Jillian,
268
00:09:33,299 --> 00:09:34,965
who we all know
was just your rebound
269
00:09:34,967 --> 00:09:36,408
after Zoey dropped
your stupid ass.
270
00:09:36,485 --> 00:09:37,484
And where she rebounded
is not much better.
271
00:09:37,561 --> 00:09:40,078
I'm sorry.
Did I just hear someone
272
00:09:40,155 --> 00:09:41,638
who's perhaps still in love
with me talking?
273
00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:42,564
'Cause you of all people
should know
274
00:09:42,641 --> 00:09:43,731
I am the realest
Zoey's ever had.
275
00:09:43,809 --> 00:09:45,417
The goofiest, as well.
276
00:09:45,494 --> 00:09:46,901
I mean, let's not forget
the whole start
277
00:09:46,979 --> 00:09:48,069
of their relationship
was some goofy shit.
278
00:09:48,147 --> 00:09:49,404
I'm sorry. You want to
run that by me again?
279
00:09:49,481 --> 00:09:51,924
What'd you say?
Oh, you --
you heard me, king.
280
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,834
Okay, enough!
Are y'all serious?
281
00:09:53,910 --> 00:09:55,502
Like, are we for real
right now?
282
00:09:55,579 --> 00:09:58,822
Is this all we can do together,
is fight and insult each other?
283
00:09:58,824 --> 00:10:00,173
No, I got it.
It's on me,
284
00:10:00,250 --> 00:10:01,934
because
I was so stupid to think
285
00:10:02,010 --> 00:10:04,102
we could have one fun moment
like we used to.
286
00:10:04,179 --> 00:10:06,104
That was freshman year, Zoey.
People change.
287
00:10:06,181 --> 00:10:08,423
Obviously, Ana,
and not for the better.
288
00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:09,757
You know what?
You get what you want,
289
00:10:09,835 --> 00:10:11,610
because I'm done trying
to bring us all together.
290
00:10:11,687 --> 00:10:14,279
You want a "you do you" weekend,
then go do yourselves.
291
00:10:14,356 --> 00:10:16,281
Actually, you know what?
I take that back.
292
00:10:16,358 --> 00:10:18,951
Screw yourselves
and this childish bullshit.
293
00:10:19,027 --> 00:10:20,435
Babe --
Damn.
294
00:10:20,512 --> 00:10:21,936
Oh!
295
00:10:22,014 --> 00:10:24,122
[ Mariachi band playing ]
296
00:10:24,199 --> 00:10:28,276
Alright!
That went poorly.
297
00:10:28,354 --> 00:10:30,220
Well,
guess it's my turn.
298
00:10:30,222 --> 00:10:33,114
♪
299
00:10:36,862 --> 00:10:40,138
What I'd hoped would be
a fun, harmless game
300
00:10:40,215 --> 00:10:41,473
to recapture that
freshman-year magic
301
00:10:41,550 --> 00:10:44,292
had become an airing of
repressed grievances
302
00:10:44,370 --> 00:10:46,052
that pushed us
even further apart.
303
00:10:46,129 --> 00:10:47,962
Figured you could use this.
Mm!
304
00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:49,815
Yeah.
Thank you.
305
00:10:49,892 --> 00:10:51,224
How you doing?
You okay?
306
00:10:51,301 --> 00:10:53,543
I mean, you know.
Yeah.
307
00:10:53,545 --> 00:10:55,212
Look,
I know you wanted to do
308
00:10:55,214 --> 00:10:56,730
all these nice things
for your friends,
309
00:10:56,806 --> 00:10:59,140
but if they can't appreciate you
or your efforts
310
00:10:59,218 --> 00:11:00,400
to make this a dope trip,
then screw 'em.
311
00:11:00,477 --> 00:11:02,052
Yeah.
What I've realized, though,
312
00:11:02,054 --> 00:11:03,495
while you've been sitting here
worrying about all this drama,
313
00:11:03,572 --> 00:11:04,888
you forgot something.
314
00:11:04,890 --> 00:11:06,223
What did I forget?
315
00:11:06,225 --> 00:11:09,226
That we are in a beautiful
foreign country, Zoey,
316
00:11:09,228 --> 00:11:10,002
with a variety of
tequila options
317
00:11:10,078 --> 00:11:11,336
and cheap
nightlife options,
318
00:11:11,413 --> 00:11:13,897
and we have yet to go on
an official first date.
319
00:11:13,899 --> 00:11:15,823
No, we've been on a...
320
00:11:15,901 --> 00:11:18,585
Wow, you're right.
We haven't.
321
00:11:18,662 --> 00:11:21,162
Yes, I know.
Which is why, tonight,
322
00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:22,422
I'm taking you out
to experience
323
00:11:22,499 --> 00:11:24,925
the very best first date
of your life.
324
00:11:25,001 --> 00:11:26,743
Yeah?
Just you and me,
325
00:11:26,745 --> 00:11:29,504
us doing us.
326
00:11:29,581 --> 00:11:31,181
Or we could go do each other
right now, literally.
327
00:11:34,511 --> 00:11:35,752
No?
No.
328
00:11:35,754 --> 00:11:38,255
Aar Bear, stop it!
Yes.
329
00:11:38,257 --> 00:11:40,365
He's crazy.
I have a problem.
330
00:11:40,442 --> 00:11:42,926
♪ Yo que se que te haces
la seria ♪
331
00:11:42,928 --> 00:11:44,519
♪ Pero lo tuyo es la maldad ♪
332
00:11:44,596 --> 00:11:47,597
♪ Cuando escucha la batería ♪
333
00:11:47,599 --> 00:11:49,857
♪ Veo que se empieza a soltar ♪
334
00:11:49,935 --> 00:11:51,968
[ Sighs ]
335
00:11:51,970 --> 00:11:54,028
Little word of
unsolicited advice,
336
00:11:54,106 --> 00:11:56,715
but it will cost you.
What?
337
00:11:56,792 --> 00:11:58,717
You got to stop letting her
get to you, man.
338
00:11:58,794 --> 00:12:00,944
[ Scoffs ]
Bro, you buggin'.
339
00:12:00,946 --> 00:12:02,704
Ain't nobody thinking
about Jazz, man.
340
00:12:02,781 --> 00:12:04,539
So how do you know
I'm talking about Jazz
341
00:12:04,616 --> 00:12:06,874
if you're not
thinking about Jazz?
342
00:12:06,952 --> 00:12:09,119
Hey, man,
get out of here
343
00:12:09,121 --> 00:12:10,787
with your little mind tricks,
alright?
344
00:12:10,789 --> 00:12:12,547
Look, just come out
with us tonight.
345
00:12:12,624 --> 00:12:15,292
I linked up with
two local baddies,
346
00:12:15,294 --> 00:12:17,235
and we're just gonna
hit the town.
347
00:12:17,312 --> 00:12:20,555
Wrong, bud.
I'mma kick it right here.
348
00:12:20,632 --> 00:12:22,816
Okay, well,
I usually wouldn't press you,
349
00:12:22,892 --> 00:12:25,410
but I need you to
do me this solid,
350
00:12:25,487 --> 00:12:27,245
'cause they don't speak
any English,
351
00:12:27,322 --> 00:12:29,155
I don't speak any Spanish,
352
00:12:29,232 --> 00:12:31,141
and you speak both.
353
00:12:31,143 --> 00:12:33,585
[ Sighs ]
354
00:12:33,662 --> 00:12:37,238
I mean, I do know my way around
el alfabeto.
355
00:12:37,316 --> 00:12:40,425
And they are bad.
356
00:12:40,502 --> 00:12:41,835
Let's get it.
357
00:12:41,911 --> 00:12:44,004
Let's go.
[ Snaps fingers ]
358
00:12:45,991 --> 00:12:47,766
[ Speaking Spanish ]
359
00:12:53,256 --> 00:12:56,182
[ Women giggle ]
What'd you say?
360
00:12:56,259 --> 00:12:57,442
I said it's a pleasure
to meet them.
361
00:12:57,519 --> 00:12:59,519
I don't know why
they laughin'.
362
00:12:59,596 --> 00:13:01,446
Maybe they dumb.
363
00:13:01,523 --> 00:13:06,118
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
364
00:13:06,194 --> 00:13:07,677
Am I gonna
have to do this
365
00:13:07,679 --> 00:13:09,029
for every outfit change
this weekend?
366
00:13:09,105 --> 00:13:10,455
Yes.
Why do you think I invited you?
367
00:13:10,532 --> 00:13:13,350
Andale.
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
368
00:13:13,352 --> 00:13:15,535
Okay, alright.
Let me see.
369
00:13:15,612 --> 00:13:18,038
Stop!
Okay, not -- Let me see.
370
00:13:18,114 --> 00:13:22,359
Please let there be something
in there that you like.
371
00:13:22,361 --> 00:13:24,377
Oh, I kind of
like this one.
Yeah?
372
00:13:24,454 --> 00:13:26,713
Yeah. I just have to
Facetune my knees.
373
00:13:26,790 --> 00:13:28,473
Alright!
Well, while you do that,
374
00:13:28,550 --> 00:13:29,474
I am gonna
go grab a shower.
375
00:13:29,551 --> 00:13:31,034
Okay.
376
00:13:31,036 --> 00:13:32,886
But you better
join me in there
377
00:13:32,962 --> 00:13:33,979
before the hot water
runs out.
378
00:13:34,056 --> 00:13:36,723
Okay.
If not,
379
00:13:36,800 --> 00:13:38,150
I'm posting
your unfiltered knees.
380
00:13:38,226 --> 00:13:38,600
[ Gasps ]
[ Speaks Spanish ]
381
00:13:40,379 --> 00:13:42,654
You're so mean.
382
00:13:42,731 --> 00:13:44,990
[ Door closes ]
383
00:13:45,067 --> 00:13:47,217
[ Water running ]
384
00:13:47,219 --> 00:13:48,326
[ Tablet chimes ]
385
00:13:48,403 --> 00:13:53,999
♪
386
00:13:54,076 --> 00:13:54,657
This shower
looks amazing.
387
00:13:56,895 --> 00:13:59,062
Really?
388
00:13:59,064 --> 00:14:00,730
I'm almost done here.
389
00:14:00,732 --> 00:14:02,065
Hurry it up!
390
00:14:02,067 --> 00:14:04,568
Coming.
391
00:14:04,570 --> 00:14:13,685
♪
392
00:14:13,762 --> 00:14:14,686
Just a little peek.
393
00:14:14,763 --> 00:14:24,029
♪
394
00:14:24,106 --> 00:14:25,438
Yo, are you coming?
395
00:14:25,515 --> 00:14:28,108
You have a freakin' STD?!
396
00:14:28,184 --> 00:14:29,684
[ Tablet shatters ]
Yo!
397
00:14:29,761 --> 00:14:30,518
Huh?!
398
00:14:30,596 --> 00:14:35,448
♪
399
00:14:35,525 --> 00:14:36,600
So, Aaron was right.
400
00:14:36,602 --> 00:14:38,710
Instead of wasting my time
401
00:14:38,787 --> 00:14:43,364
trying to force moments
with my undeserving crew,
402
00:14:43,442 --> 00:14:44,774
I decided to focus
on making moments
403
00:14:44,776 --> 00:14:48,612
with the one person
who deserved it most.
404
00:14:48,614 --> 00:14:51,389
♪ Solo una vez me tuvo y se,
se enamoro ♪
405
00:14:51,466 --> 00:14:54,467
♪ Y no me gusta
cuando me pregunta ♪
406
00:14:54,544 --> 00:14:57,044
♪ Si yo soy tu novio,
eso me asusta ♪
407
00:14:57,122 --> 00:15:00,624
♪ Solomante quiero
que tu entiendas ♪
408
00:15:00,626 --> 00:15:03,217
♪ Somos amigos solo
pa' mientras ♪
409
00:15:03,295 --> 00:15:06,554
♪ Y yo se lo que tu quieres
es un hombre para ti ♪
410
00:15:06,632 --> 00:15:10,300
♪ Y yo se lo que tu quieres
no me lo pides a mi ♪
411
00:15:10,302 --> 00:15:12,059
♪ Yo no senti, no ♪
412
00:15:12,137 --> 00:15:14,471
[ Ding! ]
413
00:15:14,473 --> 00:15:18,583
♪
414
00:15:18,660 --> 00:15:20,644
Thank you, sir.
Oh, gracias.
415
00:15:20,646 --> 00:15:23,237
Good job.
Thank you.
416
00:15:23,315 --> 00:15:25,423
Actually, like,
seriously, thank you
417
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:28,318
for an amazing first date
418
00:15:28,320 --> 00:15:29,819
and for always just knowing
exactly what to say
419
00:15:29,821 --> 00:15:32,322
and what to do
to make me feel better
420
00:15:32,324 --> 00:15:33,323
and for being you.
421
00:15:33,325 --> 00:15:35,600
Thank you.
422
00:15:35,677 --> 00:15:37,251
Well, it is what I do.
But no need to thank me.
423
00:15:37,329 --> 00:15:42,089
I really do love being in this
crazy drunken moment with you.
424
00:15:42,167 --> 00:15:43,591
Yeah?
425
00:15:43,669 --> 00:15:51,524
♪
426
00:15:51,601 --> 00:15:53,952
Green slushie.
[ Laughs ]
427
00:15:54,029 --> 00:15:55,453
Wait. You know,
we should put the --
428
00:15:55,530 --> 00:15:57,289
you know, the stuff, huh?
429
00:15:57,365 --> 00:15:59,774
While in Mexico.
Absolutely!
430
00:15:59,851 --> 00:16:01,685
In here.
So, what is next?
431
00:16:01,687 --> 00:16:04,204
I don't know, but it's not gonna
top you stealing a piñata.
432
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:06,464
That's for sure.
433
00:16:06,541 --> 00:16:08,374
What?
434
00:16:08,451 --> 00:16:11,544
What are you doing?
435
00:16:11,621 --> 00:16:13,029
Topping me stealing a piñata
436
00:16:13,031 --> 00:16:16,199
and, uh, living in this crazy,
drunken moment with you.
437
00:16:16,201 --> 00:16:17,291
Hmm?
Let's go.
438
00:16:21,890 --> 00:16:24,649
♪ All the ways you can... ♪
439
00:16:24,726 --> 00:16:28,320
In my efforts to put my six
months of adulthood behind me
440
00:16:28,396 --> 00:16:30,638
and recapture
the magical moments
441
00:16:30,716 --> 00:16:32,139
of my earliest
college memories...
442
00:16:32,217 --> 00:16:34,492
Oh, my God!
443
00:16:34,569 --> 00:16:37,329
Can I see?
Look -- "husband."
444
00:16:37,405 --> 00:16:42,000
...I managed to dive headfirst
into my most adult moment yet.
445
00:16:42,077 --> 00:16:43,576
Oh, my God.
446
00:16:43,653 --> 00:16:45,170
I mean, did we really
just do this?
447
00:16:45,247 --> 00:16:47,731
I think we did.
448
00:16:47,733 --> 00:16:49,065
Let me see the ring.
You got to pose with it.
449
00:16:49,067 --> 00:16:50,342
Look at my ring.
Does it look cool, like,
450
00:16:50,418 --> 00:16:51,234
when I go to put on
my jacket like this?
451
00:16:51,236 --> 00:16:53,086
Yes!
Oh, my God.
452
00:16:53,162 --> 00:16:54,571
I can't believe
we got married.
453
00:16:54,573 --> 00:16:54,996
Wow.
Wait. Can I see?
Can I see?
454
00:16:55,073 --> 00:16:56,740
Wow. Yes.
455
00:16:56,742 --> 00:16:57,757
Holy shit.
456
00:16:57,834 --> 00:17:01,578
Holy...
457
00:17:01,580 --> 00:17:05,248
I cannot believe I fell for your
whole celibate-Christian act.
458
00:17:05,250 --> 00:17:07,025
You love Jesus?
459
00:17:07,102 --> 00:17:10,011
No, more like you love nasty,
unprotected sexual intercourse!
460
00:17:10,088 --> 00:17:13,531
I used to love nasty,
unprotected sexual intercourse,
461
00:17:13,608 --> 00:17:16,350
but now I love my faith
and my celibacy.
462
00:17:16,428 --> 00:17:19,037
Yo, and you.
Then how the hell
463
00:17:19,114 --> 00:17:21,931
did you get chlamydia
from "Somebody," Javi?!
464
00:17:21,933 --> 00:17:23,524
And who the hell is "Somebody,"
anyway?
465
00:17:23,602 --> 00:17:24,601
A random
one-night stand I had
466
00:17:24,603 --> 00:17:28,195
before I became celibate
or met you.
467
00:17:28,273 --> 00:17:30,215
Saved her name in my phone
as "Somebody."
468
00:17:30,292 --> 00:17:31,365
Yeah, somebody who gave you
chlamydia.
469
00:17:31,443 --> 00:17:34,627
Yo, Ana, can you chill?
470
00:17:34,704 --> 00:17:35,536
My test results
came back negative.
471
00:17:35,614 --> 00:17:36,796
I didn't say anything
472
00:17:36,873 --> 00:17:38,706
'cause I didn't want you
to trip for no reason.
473
00:17:38,784 --> 00:17:40,950
Maybe if you would have come to
me and asked about it,
474
00:17:40,952 --> 00:17:43,469
I could have
explained that,
475
00:17:43,546 --> 00:17:44,562
instead of just snooping
through my tablet.
476
00:17:44,639 --> 00:17:47,807
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
477
00:17:47,884 --> 00:17:50,068
Are you really trying
to turn this around on me?
478
00:17:50,145 --> 00:17:52,404
You hacked my tablet.
479
00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:54,464
You hacked
my sexual health!
480
00:17:54,466 --> 00:17:55,723
Oh, you're out of your mind,
bro.
481
00:17:55,801 --> 00:17:57,242
Oh!
No, no, no, no.
482
00:17:57,319 --> 00:18:01,805
Watch this.
I am actually out of here!
483
00:18:01,807 --> 00:18:05,491
♪
484
00:18:05,568 --> 00:18:07,735
Don't ever call me again!
485
00:18:07,813 --> 00:18:11,405
♪
486
00:18:11,483 --> 00:18:13,149
Are you leaving?
487
00:18:13,151 --> 00:18:14,984
Yeah.
Good.
488
00:18:14,986 --> 00:18:16,986
You know what, Nomi?
489
00:18:16,988 --> 00:18:17,821
I am so sorry for
what I said earlier, okay?
490
00:18:17,823 --> 00:18:19,489
It was totally out of line,
491
00:18:19,491 --> 00:18:21,916
and it's me who's gonna end up
alone for the rest of her life,
492
00:18:21,993 --> 00:18:23,993
'cause I only know how
to date assholes!
493
00:18:23,995 --> 00:18:25,428
What --
Uh, what's going on?
494
00:18:28,183 --> 00:18:30,091
[ Sobs ]
495
00:18:30,168 --> 00:18:32,093
Okay, just come here.
Come here.
496
00:18:32,170 --> 00:18:34,112
Come on.
497
00:18:34,189 --> 00:18:37,449
If it makes you feel
any better...
498
00:18:37,525 --> 00:18:40,434
Mm-hmm.
...Javi probably
gave me chlamydia.
499
00:18:40,512 --> 00:18:42,011
Yeah, it actually does.
500
00:18:42,013 --> 00:18:43,788
Thank you.
501
00:18:43,865 --> 00:18:45,348
[ Crying ]
502
00:18:45,350 --> 00:18:46,449
It's okay.
503
00:18:49,855 --> 00:18:52,297
Man: Buenas noches.
Gracias.
504
00:18:52,374 --> 00:18:54,615
[ Dog barking in distance ]
505
00:18:54,693 --> 00:18:56,450
Doug: Yo, bro.
[ Taxi door closes ]
506
00:18:56,528 --> 00:18:58,194
So, none of this
seems sketchy to you?
507
00:18:58,196 --> 00:19:00,287
No one's around,
508
00:19:00,365 --> 00:19:04,701
and we're outside of what
may or may not be a trap house.
509
00:19:04,703 --> 00:19:05,810
I mean,
worst-case scenario,
510
00:19:05,887 --> 00:19:06,961
it's where El Chapo
hides the bodies.
511
00:19:07,038 --> 00:19:10,965
I don't, you know,
see the problemo.
512
00:19:11,042 --> 00:19:15,803
[ Woman speaking Spanish ]
513
00:19:15,881 --> 00:19:23,386
♪
514
00:19:23,388 --> 00:19:28,074
♪ Keep all of your secrets
from me ♪
515
00:19:28,151 --> 00:19:29,667
[ Grunts ]
516
00:19:29,744 --> 00:19:30,985
Wow.
517
00:19:31,062 --> 00:19:33,821
Whew!
518
00:19:33,899 --> 00:19:36,841
So, how'd it feel to make love
to your husband
519
00:19:36,918 --> 00:19:39,160
on the white sands
of Mexico?
520
00:19:39,237 --> 00:19:42,255
Well, the first few minutes
were just a little awkward.
521
00:19:42,331 --> 00:19:45,575
Well, maybe because I -- Well, I
told you that I had drank, um --
522
00:19:45,577 --> 00:19:46,684
I drank
a lot of tequila.
523
00:19:46,761 --> 00:19:47,852
And there's also a breeze
coming this way.
524
00:19:47,929 --> 00:19:51,189
Okay, but -- but it ended up
being amazing.
525
00:19:51,266 --> 00:19:53,266
Yeah?
526
00:19:53,342 --> 00:19:55,509
Mm-hmm.
527
00:19:55,587 --> 00:19:57,862
I love you, Mr. Jackson.
528
00:19:57,939 --> 00:20:00,181
I love you, Mrs. Jackson.
529
00:20:00,258 --> 00:20:02,016
Mm-hmm.
530
00:20:02,093 --> 00:20:03,426
Of all these different voices
531
00:20:03,428 --> 00:20:04,277
Screaming in my head
532
00:20:04,353 --> 00:20:07,372
Am I to blame
533
00:20:07,449 --> 00:20:10,934
[ Siren chirps ]
534
00:20:10,936 --> 00:20:11,951
Officer: Hands up!
On your feet!
535
00:20:12,028 --> 00:20:13,603
What -- what --
536
00:20:13,605 --> 00:20:14,954
Oh, my -- Oh, my God!
Oh, snap.
537
00:20:15,031 --> 00:20:16,197
Uh --
538
00:20:22,447 --> 00:20:23,555
Luca:
Yo, you coming, bro?
539
00:20:23,631 --> 00:20:25,372
Doug:
This is such a mistake, man.
540
00:20:25,450 --> 00:20:28,375
♪
541
00:20:28,453 --> 00:20:30,377
What the hell?
542
00:20:30,455 --> 00:20:34,548
♪
543
00:20:34,626 --> 00:20:36,884
Exactly what I thought.
It's a quinceañera.
544
00:20:36,962 --> 00:20:39,053
Exactly what you thought?
545
00:20:39,130 --> 00:20:41,055
Yeah.
546
00:20:41,132 --> 00:20:51,665
♪