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Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
M_I_SForEver
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Give me a second,
I'll send it over.
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Okay, is this everybody?
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Just leave the door open.
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All right, gentlemen...
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and... lady.
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My name is Bob Glasser.
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I've been sent
from corporate in Akron
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to boost
your productivity.
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00:01:57,139 --> 00:01:58,741
Now we found
the best way to do that
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is in boosting the fun
quotient of your employees.
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00:02:01,444 --> 00:02:03,446
So I'm going
to tell you a joke.
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By the by, any joke told in
the confines of this office
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must be
within OSHA regulations
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and not create any discomfort,
sexual or otherwise
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to the audience
listening to said joke.
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Ahem. Ahem. Ahem.
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All right, a priest, a minister,
and a gay rabbi walk into a brothel.
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- What is that?
- Uh...
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That's G-Money.
He works here.
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- G-Money?
- G-Money is his nickname.
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- He works here?
- Yes.
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Well, that's
unacceptable.
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Just looking at this man,
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you can tell that he's breaking about
eight different dress code policies.
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Yes, but G-Money
is actually a special case.
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Special?
Oh, like special?
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So we get a little
tax credit or something?
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00:03:07,413 --> 00:03:09,549
No, no, not that kind
of special.
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He is the company's top sales
performer for three straight years.
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- That? That is top sales?
- Morning, G-Money!
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- G-Money!
- Good morning, G!
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- For three years?
- Three years.
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- The peacock?
- Mm-hmm.
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All right. I'd like
to see him in my office.
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- Okay.
- The rest of you can F-O.
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- I'll tell you the joke later.
- Okay.
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- Oh...
- Is this... is this my office?
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First in overall sales.
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First in ancillary sales.
Well...
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This is impressive.
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- Thank you, sir.
- I just don't understand
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how is it that you're
outperforming
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my entire sales staff by...
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364%?!
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The truth?
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I love my job.
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That's good. Very good.
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- Bob, I've got to ask.
- What?
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Is that... and gosh darn it
if it is...
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I'm frizzle-frazzled and pardon my
French, all of it...
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Is that a Blues Traveler's
harmonica?
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- You have a good eye.
- Shut the front door!
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- Are you kidding me?
- No, I'm not kidding you!
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- What? You?
- Yes!
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Come on, are you
a fan of the Traveler?
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00:04:26,194 --> 00:04:28,329
- Yes, I'm a Traveler fan.
- Okay, here's what happened.
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When the Traveler came to
town I got backstage, BS.
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After he signs
this harmonica,
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he lets me put on
his harmonica belt.
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- Okay, well, mine's not that, but 2014...
- Uh-huh.
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- Popper, Red Rocks.
- Ooh.
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- A little high. You know?
- Yeah.
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You know what we do
at the Traveler.
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- What happens at the Traveler...
- ...stays there.
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I'm in the audience,
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- harmonica solo with his nose.
- Shut up!
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- Nasal solo.
- That's amazing.
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- Yes! 14 minutes.
- What?
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- Yeah.
- We should jam sometime.
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Oh, my God.
I'd jam right now.
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- You play?
- Yeah. You got some peanut butter?
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Because I got the jam, baby.
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You don't think I carry a
harmonica with me everywhere I go?
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Oh, my God!
Are you kidding me?
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- Yeah! I do.
- What? No!
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What do you want?
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Excuse me?
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Oh. Yeah. Can I get
a wine spritzer, please?
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Actually, no, make that
a lemon drop martini.
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Speaking
as a literary agent,
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not everyone has to be dead at
the end of a children's story.
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I just think it's
a part of life, right?
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The sooner, the better
for them to learn it.
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- Right.
- Yeah.
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Come here.
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No.
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You. Them. Both.
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Absolutely not!
You come here.
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I'll be right back.
Excuse me.
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What the fuck, Sara?
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- Shh. Just check out this guy.
- ...tell you what colors are.
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The disjunctive perturbation
of the spatial relationship
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brings within its realm
of discourse
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a distinct juxtaposition.
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He's the reason
people hate art.
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Really? Then why'd you
bring me here?
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Because you write
romance novels,
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and you need
to get laid.
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One circle's small,
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down in the bottom,
it's big. Why?
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Okay, can we talk about
something other than men?
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You're a lit agent.
You should know about the Bechdel test.
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Okay. Shall we discuss
your deadline?
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No! Anything but that. God,
I wish I could return that stupid advance.
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First of all, I negotiated
that advance for you,
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so it's not stupid,
it's amazing.
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Especially considering the fact
that nobody reads anymore!
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Damn it, Sara.
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I pulled you out of your sad
girl cave to inspire you.
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Pop quiz, when was the
last time you even had sex?
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- Ugh, I don't know.
- No, wrong answer.
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The answer is
367 days ago.
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What, are you tracking
my sex life on an app?
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Um, it's not an app.
It's a text.
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That's actually a really
good idea for an app.
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No. I'm enjoying
my celibacy, all right?
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It's me time.
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Doesn't "me time"
mean masturbating?
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What? No,
it definitely does not.
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Really? Well, I've been
using it wrong.
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Sara, listen,
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you owe Axi a book
in three months.
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Three months. Okay?
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So just get
those unmanicured fingers
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tap, tap, tapping
before you lose this contract
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and your career is over.
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Huh? You are almost 30.
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This is my last chance
to sell you as a prodigy.
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- I am 31.
- Don't say that out loud!
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This is a kids' world.
My biggest deal last year
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was for a seven-year-old
YouTube star's memoir.
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You could just die.
I mean, honestly.
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So sorry.
I'm so sorry.
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Oh, my God, I just thought
of something funny.
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Here's what I believe.
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The selfie has become
this religious fervor
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00:08:04,021 --> 00:08:05,489
and it's just become
insatiable.
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It's not cool.
It's not a selfie.
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00:08:07,158 --> 00:08:09,427
Hey, it's that guy
from the other room.
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00:08:09,460 --> 00:08:10,962
I'm going to assume
your name's Jeff.
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What is he doing?
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00:08:12,998 --> 00:08:16,401
And what about right now?
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What about right now?
What if we just lived right now?
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Okay, and if we can
take the time and stop,
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and be ourselves in the moment,
right, in this moment right now...
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- He's so weird.
- We are we.
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You are you. He is he.
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If we could live in this moment
in a Buddhist-like bliss...
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00:08:37,891 --> 00:08:39,993
Come on. Come on,
there's someone I want you to meet.
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- Okay, just don't be obvious. I just... Who is this guy?
- Come on.
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How about I before me,
except after you?
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I think this world
would be a much better place.
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And, to be honest, that's
what this painting is about.
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- I painted it.
- Mm.
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And shit, sure.
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I know you don't smoke,
but now you do.
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00:09:04,051 --> 00:09:06,921
I don't know, he looks like Austin
Powers fucked a chimney sweep.
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00:09:06,954 --> 00:09:08,622
Come on. Come on, let's go.
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Yeah.
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Hey, G, what up,
what up?
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- Living.
- I hear that.
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00:10:07,683 --> 00:10:10,119
Hey, G. Feel this.
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Nice.
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00:11:01,006 --> 00:11:02,207
Ugh!
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00:11:24,130 --> 00:11:25,331
Hi!
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00:11:25,365 --> 00:11:27,367
Sara, I am expecting
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00:11:27,401 --> 00:11:29,035
to see some pages
by the end of the week.
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00:11:29,069 --> 00:11:30,837
Where is this? Okay?
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00:11:30,870 --> 00:11:33,706
- You hear me?
- Yeah. I know, I know.
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00:11:33,740 --> 00:11:35,608
I am just working here.
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00:11:36,810 --> 00:11:38,178
Are you fake typing?
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00:11:38,211 --> 00:11:39,946
No.
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00:11:42,148 --> 00:11:44,150
Really? What did you
just type?
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00:11:44,184 --> 00:11:45,852
Oh, what'd I type?
176
00:11:45,885 --> 00:11:51,292
Let's see here. "Stefan
puts his hand on Zelna's neck."
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00:11:51,325 --> 00:11:53,227
Zelna? I'm sorry,
did you say Zelna?
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00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:57,798
Yeah, Zelna.
Zelna Pinks-tin-ton-ton...
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00:11:57,832 --> 00:12:01,035
- is the name of my protagonist.
- Honestly, Sara,
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00:12:01,068 --> 00:12:03,637
this self-indulgent,
narcissistic phase of yours...
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00:12:03,671 --> 00:12:04,638
This is disgusting!
182
00:12:04,672 --> 00:12:06,040
Has gone on for too long.
183
00:12:06,073 --> 00:12:08,042
Your Simon breakup
is messing with my money.
184
00:12:08,075 --> 00:12:11,346
Simon sold his soul
and became obsessed
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00:12:11,379 --> 00:12:14,249
with his 401K
and his stock options.
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00:12:14,282 --> 00:12:18,019
- So, no.
- Ooh! Ooh! What an asshole.
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00:12:18,053 --> 00:12:19,754
He grew up and did
something responsible.
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00:12:19,788 --> 00:12:22,724
Just like every fucking woman
in this world wants!
189
00:12:22,757 --> 00:12:26,228
You need to move on, so you have
a date tomorrow. His name is Ben.
190
00:12:26,261 --> 00:12:29,030
He is an artist, a real one,
who actually makes money.
191
00:12:29,064 --> 00:12:31,266
I've made you a reservation
at that place you like
192
00:12:31,299 --> 00:12:32,367
where all the food
tastes the same.
193
00:12:32,401 --> 00:12:34,069
No, no, I'm not going.
194
00:12:34,102 --> 00:12:35,439
What'd you say?
195
00:12:35,472 --> 00:12:37,106
No, I'm not going.
196
00:12:39,142 --> 00:12:42,778
Oh, you're going to do it.
And do you know why?
197
00:12:42,812 --> 00:12:45,815
Because if you don't,
I will expose you
198
00:12:45,848 --> 00:12:49,185
and everyone's going to see how you live.
Is that something you want?
199
00:12:49,218 --> 00:12:52,389
People to see the squalor
that is your studio apartment?
200
00:12:52,422 --> 00:12:54,824
Sweatpants strewn about?
Moldy, discarded,
201
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:57,126
expensive meal plan
containers everywhere?
202
00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:58,995
That pathetic vision board?
203
00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:00,330
I will bring your mother
to your apartment,
204
00:13:00,364 --> 00:13:01,899
I swear to God I will.
205
00:13:01,932 --> 00:13:03,767
And do you want her
to see that?
206
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,069
Okay, fine,
who is this guy anyway?
207
00:13:06,103 --> 00:13:08,772
Mm. Ben. This is disgusting.
208
00:13:08,805 --> 00:13:11,008
This is terrible.
Get this out of my face.
209
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,209
He came highly recommended.
210
00:13:12,242 --> 00:13:14,111
Makes musical steampunk
instruments.
211
00:13:14,144 --> 00:13:15,480
You know, balalaikas,
accordions.
212
00:13:15,513 --> 00:13:17,482
Where's my coffee?
213
00:13:17,515 --> 00:13:19,716
Some neo-Victorian shit.
214
00:13:19,750 --> 00:13:21,486
What?
215
00:13:21,519 --> 00:13:24,255
And most importantly, he's
a potential client's son,
216
00:13:24,289 --> 00:13:25,790
so don't be gross.
217
00:13:25,823 --> 00:13:27,125
I'm sorry.
Don't be late.
218
00:13:27,158 --> 00:13:28,760
Well, I don't even know
what he looks like.
219
00:13:28,793 --> 00:13:30,028
I showed him
your book jacket photo,
220
00:13:30,061 --> 00:13:31,829
so try and resemble it.
221
00:13:35,967 --> 00:13:38,369
Thank you so much.
I don't know what I'd do without him.
222
00:13:41,339 --> 00:13:44,275
And so after working
in soul-killing jobs,
223
00:13:44,309 --> 00:13:47,947
I decided to just chuck it all
and do something practical.
224
00:13:47,980 --> 00:13:51,951
Hmm. Like designing
steampunk instruments?
225
00:13:51,984 --> 00:13:54,421
I love creating something
with my own hands, you know?
226
00:13:54,454 --> 00:13:56,121
Like, when you make
something,
227
00:13:56,155 --> 00:13:58,991
you put it out there
in the world...
228
00:13:59,024 --> 00:14:02,795
There's this feeling that you
actually, I don't know...
229
00:14:02,828 --> 00:14:04,196
Matter?
230
00:14:06,265 --> 00:14:07,866
Yeah.
231
00:14:09,068 --> 00:14:10,269
Yeah.
232
00:14:12,105 --> 00:14:15,842
- So Kelly tells me you're a writer.
- Yeah.
233
00:14:15,875 --> 00:14:18,278
It's actually been
kind of crazy.
234
00:14:18,311 --> 00:14:21,147
Right after college,
I started this blog, Sara Syndrome.
235
00:14:21,181 --> 00:14:23,451
And it was sort of like
a satiric look
236
00:14:23,484 --> 00:14:27,320
at feminism and sexuality
in the age of social media.
237
00:14:27,354 --> 00:14:31,425
And now I write
these softcore romance novels
238
00:14:31,459 --> 00:14:34,861
for dumb millennials.
Like, blergh!
239
00:14:34,894 --> 00:14:36,998
- Now I'm working on my third.
- Oh, wow.
240
00:14:37,031 --> 00:14:38,533
Like a series or something?
241
00:14:38,567 --> 00:14:40,234
Would I know it?
What's it called?
242
00:14:40,268 --> 00:14:43,438
The debut is called Sext.
243
00:14:43,472 --> 00:14:45,507
But it came out
when the word was new,
244
00:14:45,540 --> 00:14:49,143
- so it was cool at the time.
- Got it.
245
00:14:49,176 --> 00:14:51,580
Actually, the whole thing
was written entirely in emojis.
246
00:14:51,613 --> 00:14:53,314
I can't tell
if you're kidding.
247
00:14:53,347 --> 00:14:55,216
Guess you'll have
to read it to find out.
248
00:14:55,249 --> 00:14:57,952
The critics were okay with it,
249
00:14:57,985 --> 00:15:00,188
but almost everyone
hated the ending.
250
00:15:00,222 --> 00:15:01,323
Why? What happens?
251
00:15:01,356 --> 00:15:03,593
Well, the protagonist,
Sara,
252
00:15:03,626 --> 00:15:07,262
she flies into this passionate
fit of jealous rage
253
00:15:07,296 --> 00:15:12,334
and castrates her boyfriend,
Ben, with a paring knife.
254
00:15:12,367 --> 00:15:15,237
Yeah!
Gotcha!
255
00:15:17,005 --> 00:15:19,475
Oh, I'm kidding.
256
00:15:19,509 --> 00:15:20,909
That was a joke.
257
00:15:20,942 --> 00:15:24,047
Whew.
258
00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:26,617
Obviously, they're not called Ben and
Sara, that would be crazy.
259
00:15:26,650 --> 00:15:30,119
But she does
castrate him at the end.
260
00:15:30,153 --> 00:15:33,189
I guess I'll just have
to read the next one.
261
00:15:33,222 --> 00:15:34,391
What is
the next one called?
262
00:15:34,425 --> 00:15:36,025
Chastity.
263
00:15:36,059 --> 00:15:38,161
Times have changed, huh?
264
00:15:38,194 --> 00:15:40,263
No, but seriously,
and don't tell Kelly this,
265
00:15:40,296 --> 00:15:45,436
but I haven't actually written a
single word in like two months.
266
00:15:45,469 --> 00:15:47,439
Am I too young
to be washed up?
267
00:15:49,674 --> 00:15:51,409
Well, maybe you're
abstaining from writing
268
00:15:51,443 --> 00:15:53,110
to learn about abstinence.
269
00:15:54,278 --> 00:15:57,047
Yeah. Maybe I am doing that.
270
00:15:58,248 --> 00:16:00,017
That's what I'm doing.
271
00:16:06,390 --> 00:16:08,192
♪ Growing up
a little dog ♪
272
00:16:08,225 --> 00:16:10,662
♪ Feeling insecure ♪
273
00:16:10,695 --> 00:16:13,998
♪ Why can't we all get along
in this doggone world? ♪
274
00:16:14,032 --> 00:16:15,634
♪ Get along, little doggies ♪
275
00:16:17,436 --> 00:16:19,137
♪ Little doggies, get along ♪
276
00:16:22,441 --> 00:16:26,545
♪ Growing up a big dog
in this big dog world ♪
277
00:16:26,579 --> 00:16:31,015
♪ Why can't we all get along
and stop being so insecure? ♪
278
00:16:34,420 --> 00:16:35,955
I'm Cowboy Cody.
279
00:16:35,988 --> 00:16:38,592
You guys might remember me
from right now.
280
00:16:38,625 --> 00:16:40,159
Maybe next week too.
281
00:16:40,192 --> 00:16:42,696
You can maybe remember me
from next week.
282
00:16:42,729 --> 00:16:44,230
I'll be back.
283
00:16:44,263 --> 00:16:46,232
Take care of yourselves.
Drink water.
284
00:16:58,412 --> 00:17:00,180
Excuse me.
285
00:17:00,213 --> 00:17:01,516
Don't I know you
from somewhere?
286
00:17:01,549 --> 00:17:03,718
Well, you might, ma'am.
Name's Cowboy Cody.
287
00:17:03,751 --> 00:17:06,052
- Play down here all the time.
- Tuesday night.
288
00:17:06,086 --> 00:17:08,556
Weren't you at the Wenke
Gallery in Fremont?
289
00:17:10,425 --> 00:17:13,260
Cowboy Cody at an art gallery?
Now that's a knee-slapper.
290
00:17:13,293 --> 00:17:16,096
I saw you talking
like a stuck-up art critic.
291
00:17:16,129 --> 00:17:19,400
And then later, you were
like this stoner professor.
292
00:17:19,434 --> 00:17:22,603
And now, what are you, like,
some kind of Southern guy?
293
00:17:22,637 --> 00:17:25,273
Do I look like a college
professor to you, ma'am?
294
00:17:25,306 --> 00:17:26,675
I'm just a simple cowboy.
295
00:17:26,708 --> 00:17:30,011
I write songs.
Sometimes I sing them.
296
00:17:30,044 --> 00:17:31,045
Have a good day,
ma'am.
297
00:17:32,481 --> 00:17:35,082
- Wait, so you're a cowboy?
- Yes, ma'am.
298
00:17:35,116 --> 00:17:37,519
Is this some kind
of reality show or...?
299
00:17:37,553 --> 00:17:40,422
Ma'am, I truly think you have
me mistaken for somebody else.
300
00:17:40,456 --> 00:17:42,990
- Have a nice day now.
- No, no, it was you.
301
00:17:43,024 --> 00:17:44,693
You're hard to miss
in a crowd.
302
00:17:44,726 --> 00:17:46,428
Come on, let me buy you
a coffee or something.
303
00:17:46,462 --> 00:17:48,631
Bless your heart, but I got
to skedaddle out of here
304
00:17:48,665 --> 00:17:51,166
and giddy on up onto my pony.
305
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,368
You need to learn
some better cowboy words.
306
00:17:53,403 --> 00:17:55,638
Come on,
I'm really curious.
307
00:17:55,672 --> 00:17:57,607
All right, well,
if you're itching to see me,
308
00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:59,676
I'm going to be in Fremont,
Wednesday at 8:00.
309
00:18:04,179 --> 00:18:06,449
- Who the hell are you?
- I'm Cowboy Cody.
310
00:18:20,363 --> 00:18:22,566
- Hello.
- Hi, it's Ben. How are you?
311
00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:24,702
Uh, good, you know?
312
00:18:24,735 --> 00:18:27,638
Just doing my thing, you know,
getting some productive writing done.
313
00:18:27,671 --> 00:18:31,675
How about you?
How's the flugelhorn coming?
314
00:18:31,709 --> 00:18:33,209
Are you blowing it?
315
00:18:34,845 --> 00:18:37,549
That was an attempt at flugelhorn humor.
316
00:18:39,250 --> 00:18:41,185
Please say something else.
317
00:18:41,218 --> 00:18:43,455
Oh, I was wondering
if you wanted to go out
318
00:18:43,488 --> 00:18:45,790
- Wednesday night with some friends of mine.
- Ooh.
319
00:18:45,824 --> 00:18:47,692
What were your friends
thinking?
320
00:18:47,726 --> 00:18:49,193
I'm not really sure yet.
321
00:18:49,226 --> 00:18:52,263
Just maybe some drinks
or maybe a show?
322
00:18:52,296 --> 00:18:55,834
You know what?
Maybe we could start off at Venue.
323
00:18:55,867 --> 00:18:58,737
Some performers are doing
something there.
324
00:18:58,770 --> 00:19:02,608
I love performers doing
something, so sure.
325
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:05,645
Great. So I'll
see you then.
326
00:19:05,678 --> 00:19:06,712
See you then.
327
00:19:32,439 --> 00:19:35,174
What am I watching?
328
00:19:35,207 --> 00:19:37,376
I think it's
a satirical piece
329
00:19:37,411 --> 00:19:40,681
on the entanglements created
by the modern social construct.
330
00:19:40,714 --> 00:19:43,382
I like the body positive
aspect to the work.
331
00:19:43,417 --> 00:19:45,886
It's so much a part of what's
missing in post-modern art.
332
00:19:48,556 --> 00:19:50,257
Bet by the end they
give birth to a sweater.
333
00:19:51,759 --> 00:19:54,629
That's impossible.
Sweaters aren't humans.
334
00:19:56,296 --> 00:19:58,298
Chloe here
is a musician.
335
00:19:58,332 --> 00:20:00,602
Yeah? What do you play?
336
00:20:00,635 --> 00:20:02,870
Chloe isn't talking
right now.
337
00:20:02,904 --> 00:20:04,606
Oh. Why?
338
00:20:04,639 --> 00:20:07,609
She's practicing meditative
silence for 24 hours.
339
00:20:11,780 --> 00:20:13,582
Cool.
340
00:20:19,855 --> 00:20:23,592
Give it up for Yarna
Sutra, everybody.
341
00:20:23,626 --> 00:20:25,661
Whoo!
342
00:20:25,694 --> 00:20:27,930
Excellent!
Excellent!
343
00:20:27,963 --> 00:20:30,833
Don't let my cat
near those guys.
344
00:20:30,866 --> 00:20:34,536
Up next, let's have
a big round of applause
345
00:20:34,570 --> 00:20:37,440
for Allie Cornbush!
346
00:20:45,448 --> 00:20:47,349
My name's Allie Cornbush.
347
00:20:47,383 --> 00:20:50,520
I'm from Iowa City, Iowa.
Go, Hawkeyes!
348
00:20:53,757 --> 00:20:56,358
I just got in town yesterday
and I got off the Greyhound,
349
00:20:56,392 --> 00:20:58,863
and there were two of the
nicest fellas waiting for me.
350
00:20:58,896 --> 00:21:00,798
One of them offered
to help me with my luggage
351
00:21:00,831 --> 00:21:02,466
and the other one offered
to get married.
352
00:21:02,500 --> 00:21:04,234
- Ooh!
- Tomorrow.
353
00:21:04,267 --> 00:21:05,536
I'm going to put it off
until tomorrow.
354
00:21:05,569 --> 00:21:06,604
We're going to do it tomorrow.
355
00:21:06,637 --> 00:21:09,239
Oh, my God.
356
00:21:09,272 --> 00:21:12,208
The reason that I came down here
is because of my grandma.
357
00:21:12,242 --> 00:21:15,446
- God bless her soul.
- Aw...
358
00:21:15,479 --> 00:21:19,984
So tonight, I'd like to perform
for you a song that I wrote.
359
00:21:20,017 --> 00:21:21,519
It's called "How To Be Alone."
360
00:21:21,552 --> 00:21:23,955
It's for anyone
who's ever felt lost.
361
00:21:34,398 --> 00:21:37,368
♪ Wish I knew
how to be alone ♪
362
00:21:37,401 --> 00:21:39,471
♪ Wish I knew how to do it ♪
363
00:21:41,006 --> 00:21:43,709
♪ Wish I knew how to be
in the room by myself ♪
364
00:21:43,742 --> 00:21:46,310
♪ Without thinking
about you and ♪
365
00:21:47,447 --> 00:21:48,815
♪ The times that we had ♪
366
00:21:48,848 --> 00:21:50,950
♪ The people we saw ♪
367
00:21:50,983 --> 00:21:52,852
♪ The places we saw together ♪
368
00:21:54,620 --> 00:21:57,924
♪ Wish I knew
how to be alone by myself ♪
369
00:21:57,957 --> 00:22:00,325
♪ I just don't know
how to do it ♪
370
00:22:03,295 --> 00:22:06,532
♪ Wish I knew
how to build a boat ♪
371
00:22:06,566 --> 00:22:08,901
♪ I wish I knew how to do it ♪
372
00:22:11,672 --> 00:22:14,675
♪ Guess I could grab
a book off a shelf ♪
373
00:22:14,708 --> 00:22:18,344
♪ And start
rifling through it ♪
374
00:22:18,377 --> 00:22:21,448
♪ But, oh, I forgot,
I don't know how to sail ♪
375
00:22:21,482 --> 00:22:24,551
♪ I don't have a sea leg
to do it ♪
376
00:22:26,887 --> 00:22:28,422
♪ I guess I'm landlocked ♪
377
00:22:28,455 --> 00:22:30,557
♪ With a boat in my driveway ♪
378
00:22:30,591 --> 00:22:32,358
♪ Oops ♪
379
00:22:32,391 --> 00:22:33,660
♪ Because ♪
380
00:22:35,730 --> 00:22:36,798
♪ I blew it. ♪
381
00:22:45,807 --> 00:22:47,776
Thank you guys so much.
I'm Allie Cornbush.
382
00:22:47,809 --> 00:22:51,345
- Yeah!
- Give it up for Allie Cornbush!
383
00:22:53,615 --> 00:22:55,382
Yo, Allie Cornbush!
384
00:22:55,416 --> 00:22:59,021
- Hey, darling. How are you?
- That was amazing.
385
00:22:59,054 --> 00:23:00,990
I mean, surprising,
but amazing.
386
00:23:01,023 --> 00:23:03,559
Thank you so much.
You're so sweet.
387
00:23:05,427 --> 00:23:08,798
Oh, this is Ben and, uh...
388
00:23:08,831 --> 00:23:11,000
Ben's friends.
389
00:23:11,033 --> 00:23:13,736
That was an interesting
performance.
390
00:23:13,769 --> 00:23:17,039
Thank you so much. You know,
sometimes the Lord and the Holy Spirit
391
00:23:17,072 --> 00:23:20,509
just come down into me,
and I don't know what I'm gonna do.
392
00:23:20,543 --> 00:23:22,779
- Oh!
- Ooh, ooh, ooh!
393
00:23:22,813 --> 00:23:23,947
Ooh, ooh!
394
00:23:26,650 --> 00:23:28,552
You've got to join us.
395
00:23:28,585 --> 00:23:31,054
I wish I could, but I've got to go.
Nice meeting y'all.
396
00:23:31,087 --> 00:23:35,091
- Toodle-oo!
- Wait, where are you going?
397
00:23:35,125 --> 00:23:37,828
What do you mean?
I got places to go and people to see.
398
00:23:37,861 --> 00:23:39,462
Well, can I come?
399
00:23:39,496 --> 00:23:40,730
How about a raincheck?
400
00:23:40,764 --> 00:23:43,099
Well, we could,
but I'm free now.
401
00:23:43,133 --> 00:23:46,036
I mean, I am kind
of on a date, but...
402
00:23:46,069 --> 00:23:48,139
Yeah, he seems happy with the
farmer and his girlfriend,
403
00:23:48,172 --> 00:23:50,908
so how about it?
404
00:23:50,942 --> 00:23:54,111
Look, truthfully,
I don't really find people
405
00:23:54,145 --> 00:23:56,113
that interesting
or worth getting to know.
406
00:23:56,147 --> 00:23:59,417
But I'm obviously very
intrigued by you, so...
407
00:24:05,022 --> 00:24:08,426
All right.
You're persistent.
408
00:24:08,459 --> 00:24:10,963
Ballard Avenue and Montlake
Boulevard at midnight.
409
00:24:10,996 --> 00:24:13,031
Midnight?
410
00:24:13,065 --> 00:24:14,833
Name's Sara, by the way,
in case you wanted to know.
411
00:24:14,867 --> 00:24:16,969
- Toodle-oo!
- Okay.
412
00:24:34,519 --> 00:24:35,889
Oh, hey.
413
00:24:38,191 --> 00:24:39,391
Let's go.
414
00:24:40,460 --> 00:24:42,061
Oh. Okay.
415
00:25:04,118 --> 00:25:06,687
Um... um...
416
00:25:06,720 --> 00:25:09,990
What-what is this?
No, seriously.
417
00:25:10,024 --> 00:25:12,459
Okay, wait for me.
Wait for me, wait for me.
418
00:25:20,167 --> 00:25:21,635
Did you hear that?
419
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,609
Is anybody there?
420
00:25:27,642 --> 00:25:30,712
No? Okay.
421
00:25:32,113 --> 00:25:33,882
Wait, what?
422
00:25:33,915 --> 00:25:36,084
Where did you... go?
423
00:25:37,719 --> 00:25:38,987
Hello?!
424
00:25:40,255 --> 00:25:41,756
Hello?!
425
00:25:43,758 --> 00:25:45,760
Hello?!
426
00:25:45,794 --> 00:25:47,697
Oh, my God!
427
00:25:47,730 --> 00:25:49,832
You are in the middle
of nowhere
428
00:25:49,865 --> 00:25:52,969
at 1:00 in the morning with some
guy whose name you don't even know.
429
00:25:53,002 --> 00:25:54,704
And now you're in the middle
of a horror movie.
430
00:25:54,737 --> 00:25:57,573
Not your best idea, Sara.
Not your best idea.
431
00:25:57,606 --> 00:25:59,008
Surprise!
432
00:25:59,041 --> 00:26:00,576
It's me, DJ Katamine.
433
00:26:00,609 --> 00:26:05,581
Okay. First of all,
do not scare me!
434
00:26:05,614 --> 00:26:08,617
And secondly, why are you
wearing that?
435
00:26:12,622 --> 00:26:14,691
Put it on. Let's find out.
436
00:26:15,859 --> 00:26:18,662
- Wait, seriously?
- Put it on.
437
00:26:18,695 --> 00:26:21,064
Put it on, come on,
put it on, put it on.
438
00:26:24,568 --> 00:26:27,037
Well, if it ain't
the OG!
439
00:26:27,070 --> 00:26:28,939
What's good, man?
440
00:26:28,972 --> 00:26:31,241
Hey, yo, we can't wait
to see you spin tonight.
441
00:26:31,274 --> 00:26:34,912
- Wait, you're a DJ?
- Something like that.
442
00:26:34,946 --> 00:26:37,148
Doesn't Deadmaus have
this whole angle covered?
443
00:26:37,181 --> 00:26:39,317
Yeah, where do you think
he got the idea from?
444
00:26:39,350 --> 00:26:41,152
What?
445
00:26:41,185 --> 00:26:43,021
Hey, man,
what's with the chick?
446
00:26:43,054 --> 00:26:44,856
- She's all right.
- I'm all right.
447
00:26:44,889 --> 00:26:46,858
What are you,
a DJ wannabe?
448
00:26:46,891 --> 00:26:50,294
Yeah, that's right.
I'm a DJ wannabe.
449
00:26:50,328 --> 00:26:53,765
- Man, I ain't working with no toy.
- Toy?
450
00:26:53,798 --> 00:26:55,299
How long you been
in the game for?
451
00:26:55,333 --> 00:26:57,201
You're still just
hitting play on Spotify.
452
00:26:58,670 --> 00:26:59,872
Is she in the decks?
453
00:26:59,905 --> 00:27:01,240
No, I got something else
planned for her.
454
00:27:01,273 --> 00:27:03,008
You do?
455
00:27:03,042 --> 00:27:04,710
Just keep the toy
away from me.
456
00:27:07,813 --> 00:27:08,981
You're the boss.
457
00:27:19,725 --> 00:27:22,161
What's up,
you sexy mofos!
458
00:27:24,197 --> 00:27:26,866
All right, our headliner's
coming to the stage.
459
00:27:26,900 --> 00:27:28,768
Give it up for the one,
460
00:27:28,802 --> 00:27:32,005
the only, DJ Katamine!
461
00:27:35,708 --> 00:27:38,278
Yo, yo, yo!
What's up?
462
00:27:38,311 --> 00:27:40,680
Make some noise!
463
00:27:40,713 --> 00:27:43,283
Let's give it up for the hottest
feline hype person in town!
464
00:27:43,316 --> 00:27:47,088
Give it up
for DJ Meow-na Lisa!
465
00:27:52,693 --> 00:27:55,729
Hell no! I'm not going out there.
I'm not a performer.
466
00:27:55,763 --> 00:27:57,331
You're wearing a mask.
467
00:27:57,364 --> 00:27:59,333
You can be anybody you want to
be, just take it.
468
00:27:59,366 --> 00:28:01,268
You go out there,
not me.
469
00:28:01,302 --> 00:28:03,637
Look, I brought you
here for a reason.
470
00:28:03,671 --> 00:28:05,072
I got a feeling about you.
471
00:28:25,093 --> 00:28:29,397
Who's ready
to lap up some milk?!
472
00:28:47,150 --> 00:28:50,353
Wow, wow,
wow, wow, wow.
473
00:28:51,455 --> 00:28:52,955
That was...
474
00:28:52,989 --> 00:28:56,325
That was so much fun!
Oh, my God!
475
00:28:56,359 --> 00:28:59,263
You got me to perform in front of
people, and I actually liked it.
476
00:28:59,296 --> 00:29:02,299
Yo, yo, yo. I'm out, G.
477
00:29:03,734 --> 00:29:05,369
Meow-na!
478
00:29:05,402 --> 00:29:07,304
- Girl, you killed it tonight.
- Thank you.
479
00:29:07,337 --> 00:29:09,039
Hey, you can hype up
any of my gigs.
480
00:29:09,072 --> 00:29:12,209
- All right? Deuces!
- Oh, thank you! Bye!
481
00:29:14,077 --> 00:29:15,078
Yo.
482
00:29:17,347 --> 00:29:18,682
I'm out.
483
00:29:21,985 --> 00:29:24,722
Hey, I haven't been up
this late since college
484
00:29:24,756 --> 00:29:27,058
and I am still ready to go.
So where do you want to go?
485
00:29:27,091 --> 00:29:28,993
What do you want to do?
Let's do it.
486
00:29:29,027 --> 00:29:30,929
Oh, don't shake
your head no.
487
00:29:30,962 --> 00:29:32,130
Next time.
488
00:29:33,131 --> 00:29:34,032
Admit it.
489
00:29:34,065 --> 00:29:35,467
You like me.
490
00:29:35,501 --> 00:29:37,936
- Give me your number.
- I'll see you around.
491
00:29:37,969 --> 00:29:41,005
Oh, let me hit you on your
celly-welly, DJ Katamine!
492
00:29:41,039 --> 00:29:42,941
What's good?
493
00:29:42,974 --> 00:29:44,809
All right, fine.
I'll give you my number.
494
00:29:44,842 --> 00:29:48,113
206-855-3152!
495
00:29:49,281 --> 00:29:50,883
All right, text me!
496
00:30:02,094 --> 00:30:04,296
You sound
like a fine young man.
497
00:30:04,330 --> 00:30:07,366
- What'd you say your name was?
- Name's George, sir.
498
00:30:07,399 --> 00:30:09,835
Now don't tell me
you're from Alabama yourself.
499
00:30:09,868 --> 00:30:12,172
Yep! Born in the great city
of Selma, sir.
500
00:30:12,205 --> 00:30:14,841
Well, heck,
I knew I liked you.
501
00:30:14,874 --> 00:30:16,376
I love the films
of Shammi Kapoor, too.
502
00:30:16,409 --> 00:30:18,411
Oh, he was wonderful.
503
00:30:18,446 --> 00:30:21,948
If you ever saw me,
you'd say that I look just like Shammi.
504
00:30:21,982 --> 00:30:24,485
Especially the way he looked
in Mama Bhanja.
505
00:30:24,518 --> 00:30:26,353
So you're a private
investigator?
506
00:30:26,386 --> 00:30:30,857
I was actually looking into
hiring a private investigator.
507
00:30:30,890 --> 00:30:32,325
Yeah, I just want
to see what I'm up to.
508
00:30:32,359 --> 00:30:35,430
I found that when I'm
in Ardha Chandrasana,
509
00:30:35,464 --> 00:30:39,000
I channel more Shiva energy if I
wrap my standing leg around my head.
510
00:30:39,033 --> 00:30:43,037
Do you hear that?
511
00:30:43,070 --> 00:30:46,040
I'm just saying
that "stop, drop, and roll,"
512
00:30:46,073 --> 00:30:47,975
you got to add
another "stop" to that.
513
00:30:48,009 --> 00:30:50,378
There's no such thing as scented Wi-Fi.
No, there's not.
514
00:30:50,411 --> 00:30:52,146
Yeah, hi, just one piece
of pizza delivered.
515
00:30:52,179 --> 00:30:53,914
You guys
just deliver pieces?
516
00:30:53,948 --> 00:30:56,951
Your total is $321.
517
00:30:56,984 --> 00:30:59,354
No. No.
518
00:30:59,388 --> 00:31:00,956
You.
519
00:31:00,989 --> 00:31:02,224
You Namaste.
520
00:31:13,469 --> 00:31:14,936
What?
521
00:31:18,140 --> 00:31:20,008
Hello?
522
00:31:20,042 --> 00:31:22,546
You left your date in the
middle of a club last night.
523
00:31:22,579 --> 00:31:25,582
- You humiliated him.
- Yeah, uh...
524
00:31:25,616 --> 00:31:27,850
It wasn't really going well.
525
00:31:27,884 --> 00:31:30,320
Okay, so you say you've got
to walk your dog
526
00:31:30,353 --> 00:31:32,623
or you have explosive diarrhea
or something.
527
00:31:32,656 --> 00:31:34,957
You don't just leave
like an animal.
528
00:31:34,991 --> 00:31:37,226
Plus, his mom? I was
on the brink of signing her.
529
00:31:37,260 --> 00:31:40,129
And she has more number one
bestsellers
530
00:31:40,163 --> 00:31:42,999
than all of my clients combined.
That includes you.
531
00:31:43,032 --> 00:31:45,536
All you had to do
was be normal,
532
00:31:45,569 --> 00:31:47,237
but you couldn't,
could you? No.
533
00:31:47,271 --> 00:31:49,206
But once again,
it was all about you
534
00:31:49,239 --> 00:31:51,543
with no thought of how
it was going to affect me.
535
00:31:51,576 --> 00:31:54,579
I'm sorry, I was wearing
a cat head at a rave.
536
00:31:54,612 --> 00:31:56,448
Be honest with me.
537
00:31:56,481 --> 00:31:59,149
- Are you on drugs?
- Please, I wish I was on drugs.
538
00:31:59,183 --> 00:32:01,051
I'm too paranoid
to be on drugs.
539
00:32:01,085 --> 00:32:02,620
No, look,
I'm sorry, I just...
540
00:32:02,654 --> 00:32:06,491
I bumped into the most
interesting person last night.
541
00:32:06,524 --> 00:32:09,661
Please don't tell me you found
another lost soul to save. Rub them!
542
00:32:09,694 --> 00:32:12,665
I did not find another
lost soul to save.
543
00:32:12,698 --> 00:32:15,133
It was that eccentric guy
from the gallery.
544
00:32:15,166 --> 00:32:17,470
I think this guy can really
inspire a good book.
545
00:32:17,503 --> 00:32:19,505
What? No. No. No book.
546
00:32:19,538 --> 00:32:22,441
Axi wants Chastity.
That is what they paid for.
547
00:32:22,475 --> 00:32:25,176
I think I can make Chastity
about identity
548
00:32:25,210 --> 00:32:28,079
and how we're all trying
to be something we're not.
549
00:32:28,113 --> 00:32:30,616
- I'm already writing it.
- It's a book to diddle to!
550
00:32:30,649 --> 00:32:33,351
What are you talking about?
What? No, stop.
551
00:32:33,385 --> 00:32:36,021
Chastity is a book
about a girl
552
00:32:36,055 --> 00:32:38,424
trying to track down
her kidnapped dog
553
00:32:38,458 --> 00:32:40,494
and hopefully banging a bunch
of hot dudes along the way.
554
00:32:40,527 --> 00:32:42,094
This isn't Tolstoy.
555
00:32:42,128 --> 00:32:43,530
What's this guy's
name anyway?
556
00:32:43,563 --> 00:32:45,064
You know what?
I don't know.
557
00:32:45,097 --> 00:32:49,001
Okay, so you're going
to write a boring novel
558
00:32:49,034 --> 00:32:51,170
about a nameless guy you just met?
Is that the plan?
559
00:32:51,203 --> 00:32:54,541
He's not one person.
He's, like, many different people.
560
00:32:54,574 --> 00:32:56,610
He's a mystery,
and I need to unravel him.
561
00:32:56,643 --> 00:32:59,514
Oh, honey, no.
Sara, the streets of Seattle
562
00:32:59,547 --> 00:33:01,381
are littered with guys
like this.
563
00:33:01,415 --> 00:33:03,518
You're mistaking crazy
for interesting.
564
00:33:03,551 --> 00:33:05,553
No, he's not crazy.
565
00:33:05,586 --> 00:33:08,221
He's a complete original,
like...
566
00:33:08,255 --> 00:33:10,991
one day, he's this pretentious,
stuck-up art critic
567
00:33:11,024 --> 00:33:13,126
and on the next,
he's a female singer.
568
00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:14,995
And then the day after that,
he's like a rave DJ.
569
00:33:15,028 --> 00:33:16,564
Okay, so fully schizophrenic,
570
00:33:16,597 --> 00:33:18,533
'cause that's exactly
what you just described.
571
00:33:18,566 --> 00:33:21,001
- Please tell me you're not sleeping with him.
- No!
572
00:33:21,034 --> 00:33:23,171
I do feel happy around him,
though, and inspired.
573
00:33:23,204 --> 00:33:24,673
Still, you should
get tested anyway.
574
00:33:24,706 --> 00:33:26,675
This is not about dating,
and it's not about me.
575
00:33:26,708 --> 00:33:28,710
It's about the book,
I promise.
576
00:33:31,179 --> 00:33:34,215
And last night,
the dam broke,
577
00:33:34,248 --> 00:33:35,584
and I couldn't stop writing.
578
00:33:35,617 --> 00:33:37,486
And it's the best stuff
I've ever written.
579
00:33:37,519 --> 00:33:39,588
You know what?
580
00:33:39,621 --> 00:33:41,155
I am going to be
late for my guitar lesson.
581
00:33:41,189 --> 00:33:43,024
- I got to go.
- You're taking guitar lessons?
582
00:33:43,057 --> 00:33:45,393
Yeah, I got to fill up
my creative gas tank.
583
00:33:45,426 --> 00:33:47,697
No, Sara, guitaring
is not writing.
584
00:33:47,730 --> 00:33:50,299
Hello! Hello!
Damn it!
585
00:33:51,501 --> 00:33:54,303
It's like you're
my only friend.
586
00:34:21,832 --> 00:34:24,400
Well, it's about time
you came to visit.
587
00:34:25,503 --> 00:34:26,570
Well?
588
00:34:32,776 --> 00:34:35,379
That's not enough.
That's not enough!
589
00:34:35,412 --> 00:34:38,082
After all we've done
for you and those kids,
590
00:34:38,115 --> 00:34:39,751
this is all we get?
591
00:34:41,418 --> 00:34:43,755
Why don't you go back
to your fancy apartment
592
00:34:43,788 --> 00:34:45,724
and get us some more money?
593
00:34:45,757 --> 00:34:48,493
- Give me my half.
- No, you're not getting half.
594
00:34:48,527 --> 00:34:51,362
- Give me the money!
- You asshole! No!
595
00:34:51,395 --> 00:34:55,534
You're just gonna drink it or you're gonna throw it away!
596
00:34:55,567 --> 00:34:58,103
- The money!
- All I know is, all his friends
597
00:34:58,136 --> 00:35:00,338
and everybody coming
over here and...
598
00:35:10,348 --> 00:35:12,117
Excuse me.
599
00:35:12,150 --> 00:35:14,386
Oh, hey!
You're from last night.
600
00:35:14,419 --> 00:35:15,655
What do you want with him?
601
00:35:15,688 --> 00:35:17,322
What do you mean,
what do I want?
602
00:35:17,355 --> 00:35:19,592
I mean, why are you
hanging with him?
603
00:35:19,625 --> 00:35:23,262
What? Who are you?
I don't even know you.
604
00:35:23,296 --> 00:35:24,731
How the hell do you know
where I live?
605
00:35:26,533 --> 00:35:28,401
- I followed you home last night.
- Okay, wow.
606
00:35:28,434 --> 00:35:30,537
If you stalk me,
I will call the cops.
607
00:35:30,571 --> 00:35:32,271
Jeez!
608
00:35:32,305 --> 00:35:35,609
- Just leave Godfrey alone.
- Oh, that's his name? Godfrey?
609
00:35:35,642 --> 00:35:36,877
Yeah, Godfrey
doesn't have no friends.
610
00:35:36,910 --> 00:35:38,512
Oh, yeah? Then who
the hell are you?
611
00:35:38,545 --> 00:35:39,646
I'm his brother.
612
00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:41,548
Wait, you're his brother?
613
00:35:41,582 --> 00:35:43,817
Yeah, so I know everything
that goes on in his life.
614
00:35:43,850 --> 00:35:46,454
Trust me, you ain't
going to be a part of it.
615
00:35:46,487 --> 00:35:50,123
Oh. Well,
are you his brother or his father?
616
00:35:50,157 --> 00:35:52,159
Because whoever he is,
he's a grown-ass man.
617
00:35:52,192 --> 00:35:54,696
He doesn't have to answer to you.
And neither do I.
618
00:35:55,863 --> 00:35:57,431
Yo, leave him alone!
619
00:35:57,465 --> 00:35:59,801
He doesn't need you
screwing up his life!
620
00:36:07,575 --> 00:36:10,178
You're no good.
The kids won't like you.
621
00:36:10,211 --> 00:36:12,380
Yes, they will,
you stupid.
622
00:36:12,413 --> 00:36:14,850
You stay down,
and you just be a stupid puppet.
623
00:36:14,883 --> 00:36:17,151
Okay.
Sorry, Boss.
624
00:36:17,185 --> 00:36:20,456
Our favorite volunteer,
Mr. G, is back with us today.
625
00:36:20,489 --> 00:36:22,357
What?
626
00:36:22,390 --> 00:36:24,325
Isn't that great?
627
00:36:26,327 --> 00:36:27,696
Hello, kids!
628
00:36:27,730 --> 00:36:30,298
I think it's time
for me to get a haircut.
629
00:36:31,900 --> 00:36:33,802
Oh,
did I hear a haircut?
630
00:36:37,741 --> 00:36:42,277
I'm a magician.
I can do it without scissors.
631
00:36:42,311 --> 00:36:45,347
Okay, now watch
carefully.
632
00:36:45,381 --> 00:36:48,752
Abracadabra.
Alakazam!
633
00:36:50,620 --> 00:36:52,622
What do you think
of your new look?
634
00:36:53,957 --> 00:36:56,191
Give me my hair back
or I will eat you!
635
00:36:57,594 --> 00:36:59,897
Okay, okay,
don't eat me, Lion.
636
00:36:59,930 --> 00:37:02,933
Okay, children,
do you remember the magic words?
637
00:37:02,967 --> 00:37:05,368
Abracadabra! Alakazam!
638
00:37:05,402 --> 00:37:08,438
Ooh, I can't see my hat.
I cannot see the top of my head!
639
00:37:11,909 --> 00:37:14,210
Thank you. Thank you.
640
00:37:22,921 --> 00:37:24,623
Sara?
641
00:37:24,656 --> 00:37:27,492
Oh, my God. Nope,
nope, nope, nope.
642
00:37:27,526 --> 00:37:30,428
- No, no, nope.
- Sara?
643
00:37:30,462 --> 00:37:31,997
Simon!
644
00:37:32,030 --> 00:37:33,699
Hi!
645
00:37:33,732 --> 00:37:35,767
Is that your bike?
646
00:37:35,801 --> 00:37:37,769
This bike?
647
00:37:37,803 --> 00:37:38,870
No.
648
00:37:40,271 --> 00:37:42,908
No. No.
Uh-uh.
649
00:37:44,476 --> 00:37:46,646
- Come here, bring it in.
- Okay!
650
00:37:46,679 --> 00:37:48,548
Hi. Oh, we're hugging.
651
00:37:48,581 --> 00:37:51,249
- Oh, okay.
- Yep. Good to see you.
652
00:37:51,283 --> 00:37:53,553
- How are you?
- Good. Good.
653
00:37:53,586 --> 00:37:56,823
God, it's been a minute.
What are you doing?
654
00:37:56,856 --> 00:37:59,892
I am taking
guitar lessons.
655
00:37:59,926 --> 00:38:01,359
See? I have a guitar.
656
00:38:02,628 --> 00:38:04,329
Hey. Your hair,
it's longer.
657
00:38:04,362 --> 00:38:08,366
It is! Thank you for noticing.
It grew, so...
658
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:10,303
- Every day, it grows.
- Yeah.
659
00:38:10,336 --> 00:38:13,040
And, yeah.
How are the suburbs?
660
00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:14,708
Not as bad as you think.
661
00:38:14,742 --> 00:38:16,944
There's actually some cool
people in the boonies.
662
00:38:16,977 --> 00:38:19,046
Oh, great! I'm sure.
663
00:38:19,079 --> 00:38:20,914
That's so wonderful.
664
00:38:20,948 --> 00:38:23,484
- Nice Dockers, by the way.
- Oh, how dare you?
665
00:38:23,517 --> 00:38:25,519
These are Banana Republic.
666
00:38:26,920 --> 00:38:28,989
This is my wife,
Allegra.
667
00:38:29,022 --> 00:38:33,060
- Allegra! Hi!
- Hi!
668
00:38:33,093 --> 00:38:37,331
- Look at that! Congratulations to you.
- Oh, thank you.
669
00:38:37,364 --> 00:38:38,833
Yeah, okay.
I'm just going to say it.
670
00:38:38,867 --> 00:38:40,434
Simon told me
all about you
671
00:38:40,468 --> 00:38:43,004
- and I loved your book.
- Oh!
672
00:38:43,037 --> 00:38:44,939
- Sext.
- What?
673
00:38:44,973 --> 00:38:47,407
Yeah, I mean, I know I'm not
exactly the target audience,
674
00:38:47,441 --> 00:38:49,409
but there are some serious
feminist undertones in there
675
00:38:49,443 --> 00:38:52,013
and it reminded me of, like,
Louisa May Alcott.
676
00:38:53,681 --> 00:38:54,649
Thank you.
677
00:38:55,817 --> 00:38:59,622
Oh, that is so nice.
Thank you.
678
00:38:59,655 --> 00:39:01,957
- Well, Allegra's a writer too.
- What?
679
00:39:01,991 --> 00:39:03,859
Oh, my God, but nowhere near
as good as what you do.
680
00:39:03,893 --> 00:39:06,061
I mean, I just write
biographies.
681
00:39:06,095 --> 00:39:08,731
- I don't invent things.
- Yeah, but you were just nominated for a PEN.
682
00:39:08,764 --> 00:39:09,899
Well, I'm not going to win,
so we don't have to talk about that.
683
00:39:09,932 --> 00:39:11,066
- PEN?!
- Don't say that.
684
00:39:11,100 --> 00:39:12,668
Everyone's
freaking out for it!
685
00:39:12,701 --> 00:39:15,704
Look, she just wrote
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's bio.
686
00:39:15,738 --> 00:39:16,839
- What?!
- Amazing.
687
00:39:16,872 --> 00:39:18,073
Guilty!
688
00:39:19,909 --> 00:39:22,344
Guilty?
689
00:39:22,378 --> 00:39:23,914
- Hmm.
- Are you okay?
690
00:39:25,549 --> 00:39:26,650
Yeah.
691
00:39:27,984 --> 00:39:29,418
So when are you due?
692
00:39:29,452 --> 00:39:31,555
Two weeks to go.
693
00:39:31,588 --> 00:39:32,923
I don't know how I
could get any bigger.
694
00:39:32,956 --> 00:39:34,925
- You're huge, by the way.
- I know!
695
00:39:34,958 --> 00:39:36,092
I'm like a beluga!
696
00:39:37,861 --> 00:39:40,396
Yeah, but I mean,
Simon's been so attentive.
697
00:39:40,429 --> 00:39:43,633
Aw, look at that!
698
00:39:43,667 --> 00:39:47,404
That's so great.
Really, that's so amazing.
699
00:39:47,437 --> 00:39:51,441
I didn't know you wanted kids!
So, that's news.
700
00:39:51,475 --> 00:39:53,010
Whatever happened to...
701
00:39:53,044 --> 00:39:56,047
"I can't in good conscience
bring a child into this world?"
702
00:39:56,080 --> 00:39:57,481
What happened to that guy?
703
00:39:57,515 --> 00:39:59,951
- Water.
- Where is he?
704
00:39:59,984 --> 00:40:02,553
Oh, I mean,
it just happened so fast.
705
00:40:02,587 --> 00:40:04,622
I mean, we were dating for
like, what, four months?
706
00:40:04,655 --> 00:40:06,090
- Five?
- That's fast!
707
00:40:06,123 --> 00:40:08,425
I think it was four months,
then we got married.
708
00:40:08,459 --> 00:40:09,728
Wow!
709
00:40:09,761 --> 00:40:11,830
And then, I mean,
this just happened.
710
00:40:11,864 --> 00:40:13,832
And, I mean, I don't even
know this guy.
711
00:40:13,866 --> 00:40:16,668
Me either!
712
00:40:16,702 --> 00:40:19,738
- Uh, honey, we don't want to be late.
- Oh! No, we don't.
713
00:40:19,771 --> 00:40:23,475
- We're taking maternity photos.
- Okay.
714
00:40:23,508 --> 00:40:25,644
Well, it was really
great seeing you.
715
00:40:25,677 --> 00:40:27,512
Okay. Yeah, really good
to see you.
716
00:40:27,546 --> 00:40:29,447
- Yeah, great meeting you.
- To meet you.
717
00:40:29,481 --> 00:40:31,149
See you, and thank you.
718
00:40:31,183 --> 00:40:32,818
- Okay. Yep. Yep, yep.
- All right. Okay.
719
00:40:32,851 --> 00:40:35,021
- Okay, bye. I love her.
- Okay.
720
00:40:35,054 --> 00:40:36,956
- I do want kids.
- Oh. We'll talk about it in the car.
721
00:40:36,990 --> 00:40:38,691
Okay, but I...
722
00:40:38,725 --> 00:40:40,026
- We'll talk about it in the car.
- Okay.
723
00:40:40,059 --> 00:40:43,463
- Speak.
- Hello, is this Sara?
724
00:40:43,496 --> 00:40:47,033
- Who is this?
- It is Mateo.
725
00:40:47,066 --> 00:40:50,536
My good friend DJ Katamine
suggested I call you.
726
00:40:50,570 --> 00:40:54,674
Oh! DJ Katamine.
Right.
727
00:40:54,707 --> 00:40:59,079
Hi, Mateo.
Buenas noches.
728
00:40:59,113 --> 00:41:03,083
- ¿Cómo está?
- No, I don't actually speak Spanish.
729
00:41:03,117 --> 00:41:05,753
So, it was suggested
by my friend
730
00:41:05,786 --> 00:41:08,889
that you might want to try
some ballroom dancing.
731
00:41:08,923 --> 00:41:13,560
Really? Well, uh,
did your friend happen to mention
732
00:41:13,594 --> 00:41:17,531
that I haven't ballroom-danced
in, I don't know,
733
00:41:17,564 --> 00:41:20,100
- like, never?
- It's okay.
734
00:41:20,134 --> 00:41:23,104
He told me you have
the body of a dancer
735
00:41:23,138 --> 00:41:25,040
and the finesse
of a mongoose.
736
00:41:25,073 --> 00:41:28,743
Oh, well, that's very...
flattering?
737
00:41:28,777 --> 00:41:31,579
Then I will pick you up
tonight at sbet w thlathwn.
738
00:41:31,613 --> 00:41:34,716
- What?
- That's Arabic for 7:30.
739
00:41:34,749 --> 00:41:38,753
Oh, right. Mateo,
I will see you then.
740
00:41:38,787 --> 00:41:40,055
Oh, wait. You don't
actually know
741
00:41:40,088 --> 00:41:43,224
where I... live.
742
00:42:50,361 --> 00:42:55,033
Mateo, I don't have any experience
with this kind of dancing.
743
00:42:55,066 --> 00:42:57,803
I don't think anyone has
in, like, 60 years.
744
00:42:57,836 --> 00:42:59,738
Follow me
745
00:42:59,772 --> 00:43:01,340
and I will lead you
to the path of beauty.
746
00:43:01,373 --> 00:43:02,875
Oh, okay.
747
00:43:02,908 --> 00:43:04,576
How'd you learn
to dance like this?
748
00:43:04,610 --> 00:43:06,712
- It is in my blood.
- Right.
749
00:43:06,745 --> 00:43:09,048
And where exactly
are you from?
750
00:43:09,081 --> 00:43:11,150
The entire
planet is my home.
751
00:43:11,183 --> 00:43:15,120
I was a young boy,
I was a goat herder in Argentina,
752
00:43:15,154 --> 00:43:18,624
and I dream of dancing the waltz
after I saw The Sound of Music.
753
00:43:20,092 --> 00:43:23,329
- I love that movie.
- Me too.
754
00:43:23,363 --> 00:43:27,867
And so I searched the country for
Maria, and I can't find her.
755
00:43:27,901 --> 00:43:30,870
And so I ended up dancing
with my goat, Sofia.
756
00:43:30,904 --> 00:43:32,072
- Okay.
- Yeah.
757
00:43:32,105 --> 00:43:33,373
So you learned to dance
with your goat.
758
00:43:33,406 --> 00:43:35,208
That sounds normal,
right?
759
00:43:35,241 --> 00:43:36,242
Very popular.
760
00:43:37,710 --> 00:43:39,145
- Wunderbar!
- What is that, German?
761
00:43:39,179 --> 00:43:40,280
Sí. Oui, oui.
762
00:43:45,418 --> 00:43:47,254
- Follow me.
- Okay.
763
00:44:19,354 --> 00:44:21,156
Ooh! Okay...
764
00:45:10,174 --> 00:45:12,776
- Magnifique.
- Thanks.
765
00:45:20,784 --> 00:45:21,719
Hey.
766
00:45:25,190 --> 00:45:26,991
So last night
wasn't a dream.
767
00:45:30,195 --> 00:45:31,896
You are welcome.
768
00:45:33,831 --> 00:45:36,301
I just realized I haven't
had a guy in my apartment
769
00:45:36,334 --> 00:45:38,470
in, like, a year.
770
00:45:38,504 --> 00:45:41,406
So thank you for being
such a gentleman.
771
00:45:42,407 --> 00:45:45,778
It is who I am.
772
00:45:47,880 --> 00:45:50,916
You know, yesterday
I ran into my ex,
773
00:45:50,950 --> 00:45:55,221
and he was with his wife.
And she was pregnant.
774
00:45:58,424 --> 00:46:01,126
I'm sorry, I don't know
why I'm telling you this.
775
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:03,395
Oh, no!
Uh, well...
776
00:46:03,429 --> 00:46:05,364
I guess it just
kind of upset me,
777
00:46:05,397 --> 00:46:10,036
because it made me sad that
he's not living his truth.
778
00:46:10,070 --> 00:46:13,840
- But there's nothing I can do about that.
- Sí.
779
00:46:13,873 --> 00:46:15,509
I'm so glad you called,
780
00:46:15,543 --> 00:46:17,844
because I feel like
our night together
781
00:46:17,877 --> 00:46:19,813
reminded me
of who I really am.
782
00:46:26,019 --> 00:46:28,922
I'm sorry.
Blah, blah, blah.
783
00:46:30,323 --> 00:46:32,325
Why don't you tell me
something about you?
784
00:46:34,195 --> 00:46:36,565
Well...
785
00:46:36,598 --> 00:46:39,200
I am but a poor,
young goat herder...
786
00:46:39,233 --> 00:46:41,902
- From Argentina. Yeah, I know.
- Argentina.
787
00:46:41,936 --> 00:46:44,238
But see,
I just spilled my guts,
788
00:46:44,272 --> 00:46:47,975
so maybe you can tell me something
honest, something true.
789
00:46:48,009 --> 00:46:49,810
Okay. Well...
790
00:46:51,078 --> 00:46:57,553
I come to the US...
I'm a stowaway.
791
00:46:57,587 --> 00:46:59,988
Wait, is this
a real story?
792
00:47:00,022 --> 00:47:02,090
'Cause I know you're not
really from Argentina.
793
00:47:02,124 --> 00:47:04,026
I am!
794
00:47:04,059 --> 00:47:07,095
'Cause I just assumed last
night we were messing around,
795
00:47:07,129 --> 00:47:09,599
so what's...
What's your deal?
796
00:47:09,632 --> 00:47:13,569
I first move here to
Miami, I have no job.
797
00:47:13,603 --> 00:47:16,405
And so I start
as a dishwasher,
798
00:47:16,438 --> 00:47:18,574
and I do some things
I am not proud of.
799
00:47:18,608 --> 00:47:21,944
- I'm not judging, so...
- Okay, so my friend, Manny,
800
00:47:21,978 --> 00:47:25,048
he tells me about a job we
can do for money, you know?
801
00:47:25,081 --> 00:47:29,419
We sell ze yayo.
Ze cocaine.
802
00:47:29,452 --> 00:47:31,622
And we get a job.
803
00:47:31,655 --> 00:47:33,890
We go down to South Beach,
we have a kilo,
804
00:47:33,923 --> 00:47:36,259
and this man and wife,
they take the kilo,
805
00:47:36,292 --> 00:47:38,495
they don't give us money,
and they take Manny.
806
00:47:38,529 --> 00:47:41,130
And they beat him.
And they put him in the shower,
807
00:47:41,164 --> 00:47:43,366
and they chain him up
and they get a chainsaw.
808
00:47:45,034 --> 00:47:47,539
And they're going to kill him.
And I say, "No!"
809
00:47:47,572 --> 00:47:50,508
Wait. Are you fucking
with me? What is this?
810
00:47:50,542 --> 00:47:52,409
No, I'm not fucking.
811
00:47:52,443 --> 00:47:54,612
That's the plot
of Scarface, dude.
812
00:47:54,646 --> 00:47:58,583
I have... never
seen such movies.
813
00:47:58,616 --> 00:48:02,319
No. No. Seriously?
814
00:48:03,688 --> 00:48:06,390
What is this?
What's happening right now?
815
00:48:06,423 --> 00:48:10,428
- Are you pranking me?
- No! I am telling you a story.
816
00:48:10,462 --> 00:48:13,198
No, you're not.
You're not telling a story.
817
00:48:13,231 --> 00:48:17,335
You're making a joke about
everything, and I'm believing you.
818
00:48:17,369 --> 00:48:19,672
God, I don't know
what this is.
819
00:48:19,705 --> 00:48:21,674
I don't know what
happened last night.
820
00:48:21,707 --> 00:48:23,542
Maybe it's because I
actually like you.
821
00:48:23,576 --> 00:48:27,546
Maybe it's because I saw
my ex, but either way,
822
00:48:27,580 --> 00:48:29,515
I spent the night
with you, okay?
823
00:48:29,548 --> 00:48:34,688
And I'm-I'm dressed,
but I feel completely naked right now.
824
00:48:34,721 --> 00:48:36,922
I need to know
who I'm with.
825
00:48:45,665 --> 00:48:47,534
Nothing?
826
00:48:53,472 --> 00:48:57,009
Okay, so now I have
to ask you to leave.
827
00:49:01,682 --> 00:49:03,551
I want you to leave.
828
00:49:10,691 --> 00:49:13,026
You have to go! Now!
829
00:49:46,462 --> 00:49:48,263
Who are you?
830
00:49:54,470 --> 00:49:55,471
Nobody.
831
00:50:07,750 --> 00:50:10,721
So I'm downstairs,
and I hear this noise.
832
00:50:10,754 --> 00:50:14,457
I push open the bathroom door,
and there's Dan,
833
00:50:14,492 --> 00:50:17,628
- and he is standing there wiping off makeup.
- Right.
834
00:50:17,661 --> 00:50:19,797
Makeup!
It was my makeup!
835
00:50:19,830 --> 00:50:22,131
And I get it,
it's modern times right now,
836
00:50:22,165 --> 00:50:24,535
and we're all supposed to be,
like, gender fluid or whatever.
837
00:50:24,568 --> 00:50:26,670
But you would think,
after eight years of marriage,
838
00:50:26,704 --> 00:50:28,539
my husband would tell me
if he was thinking
839
00:50:28,572 --> 00:50:32,342
- about crossdressing or whatever.
- Maybe.
840
00:50:32,375 --> 00:50:35,346
Yeah. I guess
it doesn't matter.
841
00:50:35,379 --> 00:50:37,147
It would have been nice
if you listened to my story
842
00:50:37,181 --> 00:50:40,284
about my husband using
all of my foundation.
843
00:50:40,317 --> 00:50:43,354
- I slept with him.
- Who, Dan?
844
00:50:43,387 --> 00:50:47,826
- No, with the guy.
- Nutty? You slept with Nutty?
845
00:50:47,859 --> 00:50:50,562
- I slept with him.
- Oh, God!
846
00:50:50,595 --> 00:50:54,331
I didn't sleep with him.
We just cuddled all night, but...
847
00:50:54,365 --> 00:50:56,367
And don't call him Nutty.
His name's Godfrey,
848
00:50:56,400 --> 00:50:58,671
or Mateo,
or, like, whatever.
849
00:50:58,704 --> 00:51:00,472
- His name is Godfrey?
- Yeah.
850
00:51:00,506 --> 00:51:02,107
Some parent named
their kid Godfrey,
851
00:51:02,140 --> 00:51:04,242
and then you slept
with that guy.
852
00:51:04,276 --> 00:51:07,245
- You slept with a Godfrey.
- I was feeling vulnerable.
853
00:51:07,279 --> 00:51:09,247
And he was charming.
He was very charming.
854
00:51:09,281 --> 00:51:11,484
He took us out dancing!
We danced!
855
00:51:11,517 --> 00:51:13,853
Like, we really danced.
And then next thing you know,
856
00:51:13,886 --> 00:51:16,656
- we're just, like, spooning in my bed.
- Is that fun?
857
00:51:16,689 --> 00:51:19,625
It might have something to do with the
fact that I bumped into Simon earlier.
858
00:51:19,659 --> 00:51:21,562
What? Oh, dear!
859
00:51:21,595 --> 00:51:23,329
He's married.
860
00:51:23,362 --> 00:51:27,166
And his PEN Award-nominated
wife is pregnant.
861
00:51:27,199 --> 00:51:30,136
Ugh, shit! I hate it when men upgrade.
No offense.
862
00:51:30,169 --> 00:51:31,505
Do you think
she needs an agent?
863
00:51:31,538 --> 00:51:33,507
I'm kidding!
I'm kidding.
864
00:51:33,540 --> 00:51:37,711
Come here. Look,
it's okay. I'm here.
865
00:51:37,744 --> 00:51:39,211
Did you get any good
material from this?
866
00:51:39,245 --> 00:51:40,614
- Are you serious?
- I'm just...
867
00:51:40,647 --> 00:51:43,316
Hey! Hey, you!
Yeah, you!
868
00:51:43,349 --> 00:51:44,685
- You're the crazy lady.
- Yeah, you know what?
869
00:51:44,718 --> 00:51:47,789
I am crazed. Fucking crazed
for some Fromage Madeleine,
870
00:51:47,822 --> 00:51:50,457
which you don't have for the
third week in a row, by the way.
871
00:51:50,491 --> 00:51:52,192
Who do I have to blow
872
00:51:52,225 --> 00:51:54,629
to get some decent cheese
around here? Is it you?
873
00:51:54,662 --> 00:51:56,330
Is that what you want?
You want me to embarrass you
874
00:51:56,363 --> 00:51:57,599
in front of all
your clerk friends?
875
00:51:57,632 --> 00:51:59,500
No. I will go check
with my manager.
876
00:51:59,534 --> 00:52:02,670
Yeah. Do that,
because this threat extends to him, too!
877
00:52:02,704 --> 00:52:04,772
- It's fine.
- I'm just...
878
00:52:04,806 --> 00:52:06,373
I'm so confused. Like,
879
00:52:06,406 --> 00:52:08,275
who have I been hanging
out with this whole time?
880
00:52:08,308 --> 00:52:12,246
- Why is he doing this?
- Um, he's crazy, so just stay away.
881
00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:15,350
He's not crazy.
He's choosing his personalities.
882
00:52:15,383 --> 00:52:17,285
Trust me.
I did some Googling.
883
00:52:17,318 --> 00:52:19,588
Oh, boy.
Um... Ahem, Sara?
884
00:52:19,622 --> 00:52:20,756
- What?
- Ahem.
885
00:52:20,789 --> 00:52:23,626
- I was wrong. Okay?
- Whoa.
886
00:52:23,659 --> 00:52:27,696
I was wrong, I said it,
to ask you to come out of your shell.
887
00:52:27,730 --> 00:52:31,800
All right? So just stuff yourself
back in there and finish your book,
888
00:52:31,834 --> 00:52:33,803
because so far,
the material is pretty good
889
00:52:33,837 --> 00:52:37,641
and all you need is some
distance and objectivity, right?
890
00:52:37,674 --> 00:52:39,743
- Do not shit where you eat.
- Okay.
891
00:52:39,776 --> 00:52:42,846
You don't think I have plenty of
clients that I would love to bang,
892
00:52:42,879 --> 00:52:44,346
but I don't,
and you know why?
893
00:52:44,380 --> 00:52:46,783
- Uh-uh.
- Commission.
894
00:52:46,816 --> 00:52:48,618
- You thought I was going to say morals.
- I did.
895
00:52:48,652 --> 00:52:50,787
It's commission.
896
00:52:52,354 --> 00:52:54,390
Class,
guess who's back?
897
00:52:54,423 --> 00:52:57,460
It's our volunteer,
Mr. G!
898
00:52:57,495 --> 00:52:59,530
Yay!
899
00:52:59,563 --> 00:53:01,398
Whoa!
900
00:53:01,431 --> 00:53:04,200
You guys look
so much older.
901
00:53:04,234 --> 00:53:06,436
- How are you?
- Good.
902
00:53:06,469 --> 00:53:08,939
Are you good? Good.
903
00:53:08,973 --> 00:53:11,609
- You guys want to read a book?
- Yeah!
904
00:53:11,642 --> 00:53:13,410
- Yeah?
- You will read the book.
905
00:53:13,443 --> 00:53:15,546
You know what?
I'll read a book for you.
906
00:53:15,579 --> 00:53:17,815
How to Be a Friend. That sounds
like a good book, doesn't it?
907
00:53:17,848 --> 00:53:20,685
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
908
00:53:20,718 --> 00:53:24,355
"There are times when it
feels good to be by yourself
909
00:53:24,388 --> 00:53:26,692
and enjoying
your own company.
910
00:53:26,725 --> 00:53:32,396
But there are also times when
you may feel lonely or bored,
911
00:53:32,430 --> 00:53:34,733
when you want to have
someone to play with...
912
00:53:40,404 --> 00:53:42,674
Anyone who is nice to you
913
00:53:42,708 --> 00:53:45,645
and who likes
to play with you
914
00:53:45,678 --> 00:53:47,479
can become your friend."
915
00:53:52,852 --> 00:53:54,821
"The best thing
about having a friend
916
00:53:54,854 --> 00:53:58,223
is... sharing."
917
00:54:05,765 --> 00:54:08,034
Do you need to go
to the potty, Mr. G?
918
00:54:12,005 --> 00:54:15,341
I'm fine. I'm fine.
Thank you. Um...
919
00:54:15,374 --> 00:54:17,745
"We want somebody
to share with.
920
00:54:17,778 --> 00:54:19,780
Mr. Frog wants to share."
921
00:54:19,813 --> 00:54:21,447
Who wants to share
with Mr. Frog?
922
00:54:21,481 --> 00:54:24,585
♪ Broke my heart,
woe my soul ♪
923
00:54:24,618 --> 00:54:26,854
♪ You got a lover's
rock and roll ♪
924
00:54:26,887 --> 00:54:29,790
♪ The next day,
a man, he lived next door ♪
925
00:54:29,823 --> 00:54:32,793
♪ He kept me up all night,
made trouble, boy... ♪
926
00:54:35,429 --> 00:54:36,831
Hey, what up?
927
00:54:36,865 --> 00:54:38,700
What, are you
stalking me again?
928
00:54:38,733 --> 00:54:40,935
Hell, no.
This is my office.
929
00:54:40,969 --> 00:54:43,538
- Your office?
- Yeah.
930
00:54:46,373 --> 00:54:49,778
What is that, weed?
I thought weed was legal.
931
00:54:49,811 --> 00:54:52,747
People still like the drama
of buying it on the street.
932
00:54:53,915 --> 00:54:56,383
Okay,
what do you want?
933
00:54:56,416 --> 00:54:59,387
- He's sorry.
- Oh, you talked to him.
934
00:54:59,420 --> 00:55:02,725
Look, I don't know what he
did, but he feels bad about it.
935
00:55:05,961 --> 00:55:07,897
All right, sit down.
Let's talk.
936
00:55:12,400 --> 00:55:15,571
Here. Take that.
You can have it.
937
00:55:18,641 --> 00:55:21,545
- What the hell is this?
- It's tofu.
938
00:55:21,578 --> 00:55:24,480
- Tofu? I thought it was turkey.
- Yeah.
939
00:55:24,514 --> 00:55:26,415
You don't just hand someone
a tofu sandwich
940
00:55:26,448 --> 00:55:28,718
and not say anything.
What's wrong with you?
941
00:55:28,752 --> 00:55:31,054
I'm sorry,
man. Jeez.
942
00:55:33,757 --> 00:55:36,793
So what's up
with your brother?
943
00:55:36,827 --> 00:55:39,529
- It's complicated.
- Yeah, no shit.
944
00:55:39,563 --> 00:55:42,098
I mean, is he ever
himself?
945
00:55:42,132 --> 00:55:44,802
Have I actually
even met the guy?
946
00:55:44,836 --> 00:55:46,737
Yeah, but...
947
00:55:46,771 --> 00:55:49,740
it's all versions of him.
You know what I mean?
948
00:55:49,774 --> 00:55:51,142
No, I don't.
949
00:55:51,175 --> 00:55:53,744
Well, all the "hims,"
they're still him,
950
00:55:53,778 --> 00:55:56,881
but he doesn't want to be
completely himself.
951
00:55:59,150 --> 00:56:00,483
You don't want to know.
952
00:56:01,719 --> 00:56:03,788
I do want to know.
953
00:56:03,821 --> 00:56:05,422
I care
about your brother.
954
00:56:07,525 --> 00:56:09,628
I know I don't know him,
clearly,
955
00:56:09,661 --> 00:56:11,930
but... I feel like...
956
00:56:13,732 --> 00:56:17,903
inside, there's
a special, sweet person.
957
00:56:22,875 --> 00:56:24,543
Man, the only reason
I'm telling you this
958
00:56:24,576 --> 00:56:26,778
is because Godfrey
likes you, okay?
959
00:56:26,812 --> 00:56:28,847
Because you need to understand
where he's coming from.
960
00:56:31,650 --> 00:56:33,418
Godfrey's parents
were worthless.
961
00:56:34,921 --> 00:56:37,957
Okay? They took in
foster kids to make money.
962
00:56:37,991 --> 00:56:40,660
When we were growing up,
Godfrey was more than a brother
963
00:56:40,693 --> 00:56:43,096
to me
and my sister, Didi.
964
00:56:43,129 --> 00:56:45,531
He was like our dad.
965
00:56:45,565 --> 00:56:47,033
He took care of us.
966
00:56:47,066 --> 00:56:50,103
Cooked, cleaned,
made us go to school.
967
00:56:51,237 --> 00:56:52,639
My sister...
968
00:56:54,107 --> 00:56:57,044
she wasn't but five
years old at the time,
969
00:56:57,077 --> 00:56:59,713
and one day while Godfrey was
getting me ready for school,
970
00:56:59,747 --> 00:57:02,583
Di was playing by the window
in the living room.
971
00:57:02,616 --> 00:57:05,219
And my fosters was in there,
but they was drunk,
972
00:57:05,252 --> 00:57:07,688
passed out or some shit.
973
00:57:10,090 --> 00:57:11,592
Next thing you know...
974
00:57:13,227 --> 00:57:14,561
she fell out.
975
00:57:16,697 --> 00:57:18,899
And we ran downstairs,
and, um...
976
00:57:18,933 --> 00:57:21,102
Godfrey took her
in his arms, but...
977
00:57:22,637 --> 00:57:23,939
she was gone.
978
00:57:26,808 --> 00:57:28,475
Oh, my God.
979
00:57:29,811 --> 00:57:32,747
My fosters blamed it
all on Godfrey.
980
00:57:32,781 --> 00:57:36,584
- Oh, come on! That's not fair.
- It doesn't matter.
981
00:57:36,618 --> 00:57:39,120
Since then, he's just been
blocking out the world.
982
00:57:39,154 --> 00:57:41,022
That's why he does
them characters.
983
00:57:41,056 --> 00:57:43,792
He don't like being himself
'cause of the guilt.
984
00:57:43,825 --> 00:57:46,963
I haven't really seen the
real Godfrey since she died.
985
00:57:49,799 --> 00:57:52,635
I'm so sorry.
986
00:57:52,668 --> 00:57:54,469
Is he getting any help?
987
00:57:55,671 --> 00:57:57,506
He's working
and making a living
988
00:57:57,540 --> 00:58:00,910
and functioning,
so that's all I care about.
989
00:58:03,012 --> 00:58:05,047
What can I do?
990
00:58:05,081 --> 00:58:07,817
Well, best thing you could've
done was leave him be,
991
00:58:07,850 --> 00:58:10,153
but now that you
messed that up, just...
992
00:58:10,187 --> 00:58:12,656
I don't know,
be a good friend to him.
993
00:58:13,991 --> 00:58:15,559
I mean, I would like to,
994
00:58:15,592 --> 00:58:17,828
but I can't even get
ahold of him.
995
00:58:24,634 --> 00:58:27,270
He's going to be
at this tonight.
996
00:58:27,304 --> 00:58:30,841
What is this?
Like stand-up comedy?
997
00:58:30,874 --> 00:58:33,177
No clue. He's always
doing something
998
00:58:33,211 --> 00:58:34,912
to keep his mind focused
on anything but himself.
999
00:58:34,946 --> 00:58:36,247
Does he even enjoy it?
1000
00:58:36,280 --> 00:58:38,249
He kind of relaxes
around kids.
1001
00:58:38,282 --> 00:58:41,686
That's the only time
he feels really calm.
1002
00:58:41,719 --> 00:58:44,022
- Where are you going?
- I've got to pick up a new mixer.
1003
00:58:44,055 --> 00:58:46,124
I'm just short on a
little paper right now.
1004
00:58:46,157 --> 00:58:48,226
Oh. Well, do you
want some money?
1005
00:58:48,259 --> 00:58:51,095
- I have some.
- Hey, don't try buying me off.
1006
00:58:51,129 --> 00:58:52,830
You just be you.
1007
00:58:54,932 --> 00:58:57,536
Just be me. Okay.
1008
00:59:04,176 --> 00:59:06,278
I am ready on my own.
1009
00:59:06,311 --> 00:59:08,714
As the Earth readies
my surroundings,
1010
00:59:08,747 --> 00:59:14,053
I sit deep in silence
as I meditate on my opulence.
1011
00:59:14,086 --> 00:59:16,655
Thank you.
1012
00:59:16,688 --> 00:59:19,191
Give it up once again
there for Lesa Koitsioe.
1013
00:59:19,224 --> 00:59:21,361
Coming up next,
we have a guy
1014
00:59:21,394 --> 00:59:23,696
that says he's going
to do something.
1015
00:59:23,730 --> 00:59:25,965
Please welcome to the stage,
for the very first time,
1016
00:59:25,999 --> 00:59:27,801
Tim Dimmitt.
1017
00:59:33,239 --> 00:59:34,340
Thanks.
1018
00:59:40,246 --> 00:59:42,148
I wrote... um...
1019
00:59:43,383 --> 00:59:44,985
I wrote something.
1020
00:59:53,260 --> 00:59:55,062
She.
1021
01:00:01,869 --> 01:00:06,207
"She... she flutters
through the house,
1022
01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:08,375
a splash of sunshine,
1023
01:00:08,409 --> 01:00:10,745
sprinkling her magic
in the air with laughter.
1024
01:00:12,080 --> 01:00:14,783
Each syllable of sound
echoes in my soul.
1025
01:00:16,284 --> 01:00:19,387
But as I walk in a space
of a world left behind,
1026
01:00:19,421 --> 01:00:21,790
I see the ghost of her
1027
01:00:21,823 --> 01:00:24,993
and I search and search,
but all in vain.
1028
01:00:28,830 --> 01:00:29,998
And I hear...
1029
01:00:31,299 --> 01:00:33,636
an echo of nothing.
1030
01:00:40,810 --> 01:00:43,146
So upon these streets,
I wa..."
1031
01:00:43,179 --> 01:00:44,413
I'm sorry.
1032
01:00:46,816 --> 01:00:49,352
"So upon these streets,
I walk alone.
1033
01:00:51,787 --> 01:00:54,257
But now a new sound
fills the air...
1034
01:00:54,290 --> 01:00:57,694
The laughter of a woman
who has walked beside me.
1035
01:00:57,728 --> 01:01:00,297
She's helped fill the void
through music,
1036
01:01:00,330 --> 01:01:04,001
through words,
art and rhyme...
1037
01:01:05,802 --> 01:01:07,871
and eases the pain
of the simple sound
1038
01:01:07,905 --> 01:01:09,773
of a child who's long gone."
1039
01:01:36,034 --> 01:01:39,070
So, Tim Dimmitt.
1040
01:01:41,072 --> 01:01:43,208
You always wear
your sunglasses at night?
1041
01:01:43,241 --> 01:01:48,047
- My eyes are sensitive to light.
- Oh.
1042
01:01:48,080 --> 01:01:50,349
So I use my other senses,
like my hands,
1043
01:01:50,382 --> 01:01:53,852
nose, and ears
in low-light situations.
1044
01:01:53,886 --> 01:01:55,788
And I can tell that you're
wearing a moisturizer
1045
01:01:55,821 --> 01:01:59,024
that has a strong
scent of gardenia,
1046
01:01:59,058 --> 01:02:00,192
a hint of jasmine...
1047
01:02:01,427 --> 01:02:03,762
and a refined
honeysuckle finish.
1048
01:02:06,198 --> 01:02:08,969
- That's amazing.
- Heard that.
1049
01:02:15,275 --> 01:02:17,477
I can tell you're
a very sensitive man.
1050
01:02:18,945 --> 01:02:21,515
The poem you recited
was very moving.
1051
01:02:21,549 --> 01:02:23,316
It must have taken
a lot of courage
1052
01:02:23,350 --> 01:02:25,952
to say it out loud
like that.
1053
01:02:27,287 --> 01:02:29,489
Oh, I'm just trying
to sort things out.
1054
01:02:29,523 --> 01:02:31,791
The world
is a messy place.
1055
01:02:35,429 --> 01:02:37,198
Hey,
how are you doing?
1056
01:02:38,432 --> 01:02:40,401
I'm all right,
you know?
1057
01:02:40,434 --> 01:02:43,337
Just killing time.
1058
01:02:44,573 --> 01:02:47,208
Before we met,
1059
01:02:47,241 --> 01:02:49,076
I was kind of in a funk.
1060
01:02:50,311 --> 01:02:53,080
I was depressed,
to be honest.
1061
01:02:54,448 --> 01:02:56,918
I couldn't access
my creativity,
1062
01:02:56,952 --> 01:02:59,589
and then... I met you,
1063
01:02:59,622 --> 01:03:03,091
and that all
went away. So...
1064
01:03:04,459 --> 01:03:07,095
I guess that's the
opposite of killing time.
1065
01:03:12,467 --> 01:03:14,036
Hey, why don't you
tell me something
1066
01:03:14,069 --> 01:03:16,004
about the girl
in the poem?
1067
01:03:21,944 --> 01:03:24,080
I don't like talking
about it, it's...
1068
01:03:25,882 --> 01:03:26,916
It's too hard.
1069
01:03:28,552 --> 01:03:32,922
I understand.
It is hard.
1070
01:03:32,955 --> 01:03:37,960
It's hard to talk about the most
painful things in our lives,
1071
01:03:37,994 --> 01:03:41,164
but sometimes...
1072
01:03:41,197 --> 01:03:45,069
when we look inside and deal
with those most painful things,
1073
01:03:45,102 --> 01:03:48,540
it can turn into something
really beautiful.
1074
01:03:50,040 --> 01:03:54,111
So... if you want
to talk about her...
1075
01:03:55,580 --> 01:03:56,880
I'm here.
1076
01:04:01,251 --> 01:04:06,090
It's been a long time
since I let someone in.
1077
01:04:10,995 --> 01:04:12,997
Her name was Didi.
1078
01:04:15,534 --> 01:04:17,435
She had a beautiful soul.
1079
01:04:18,436 --> 01:04:20,305
She loved country music,
1080
01:04:20,338 --> 01:04:23,508
so I'd sing "Achy-Breaky
Heart" to her every morning.
1081
01:04:23,542 --> 01:04:26,444
Her laugh was magic.
1082
01:04:26,478 --> 01:04:28,913
- Oh, my God! Oh!
- I am so sorry!
1083
01:04:28,947 --> 01:04:31,449
- Ew. Oh, it's soaked. Oh, my God.
- Oh...
1084
01:04:31,483 --> 01:04:33,986
- Yeah, can I get a napkin, please?
- Yeah.
1085
01:04:34,019 --> 01:04:36,021
Oh, my dress.
1086
01:04:36,055 --> 01:04:37,990
You know what?
I'm going to go to the bathroom.
1087
01:04:38,023 --> 01:04:39,593
I'm sorry.
Excuse me.
1088
01:04:40,594 --> 01:04:41,595
God!
1089
01:05:54,403 --> 01:05:56,405
Shit.
1090
01:07:01,574 --> 01:07:03,709
Okay, we've got
to stop meeting like this.
1091
01:07:03,743 --> 01:07:05,611
So, this was all
about a book?
1092
01:07:05,645 --> 01:07:07,178
Yeah, I was right about you.
1093
01:07:07,212 --> 01:07:08,714
That's not fair.
I care about your brother.
1094
01:07:08,748 --> 01:07:10,382
No, you don't care
about shit.
1095
01:07:10,415 --> 01:07:12,284
You're just one more person
with their hand out,
1096
01:07:12,317 --> 01:07:13,586
taking what you want
from him.
1097
01:07:13,619 --> 01:07:15,120
You're just
like our fosters.
1098
01:07:15,153 --> 01:07:17,355
I have been looking for him.
Where is he?
1099
01:07:17,389 --> 01:07:19,559
No, I told you not to get
involved with him, okay?
1100
01:07:19,592 --> 01:07:21,728
Now he's got to put his pieces
back together 'cause of you.
1101
01:07:21,762 --> 01:07:24,765
What do you expect me to do?
I can't help someone
1102
01:07:24,798 --> 01:07:26,733
who won't even admit
that they have a problem.
1103
01:07:26,767 --> 01:07:29,536
A problem? No, you're
the one with a problem.
1104
01:07:29,570 --> 01:07:31,103
Now stay the fuck
away from us.
1105
01:07:31,137 --> 01:07:33,774
- I won't ask again.
- Where is he?
1106
01:07:33,807 --> 01:07:37,476
Well, what's his address?
I'll find him myself.
1107
01:07:37,510 --> 01:07:39,145
A last name, maybe?
1108
01:07:39,178 --> 01:07:42,381
Gee, thanks, Shad.
Very helpful.
1109
01:07:48,355 --> 01:07:49,591
- It's finished?
- Yeah.
1110
01:07:49,624 --> 01:07:51,726
Oh, that was fast.
1111
01:07:51,759 --> 01:07:54,161
I'm actually excited
to see how this thing ends.
1112
01:07:55,763 --> 01:07:57,565
So what's up
with you and Godfrey?
1113
01:07:57,599 --> 01:07:59,366
I still
haven't seen him.
1114
01:07:59,399 --> 01:08:02,135
Sara, you need to find
him and make things right.
1115
01:08:02,169 --> 01:08:04,137
If he was pissed
about your personal diary,
1116
01:08:04,171 --> 01:08:05,740
he's going to be
even more upset
1117
01:08:05,773 --> 01:08:07,909
when your book is
a huge best-seller,
1118
01:08:07,942 --> 01:08:09,845
knock on wood.
1119
01:08:09,878 --> 01:08:12,213
Well, his brother
told me to stay away.
1120
01:08:12,246 --> 01:08:14,550
- So what? Who cares?
- So, I'm staying away.
1121
01:08:14,583 --> 01:08:18,587
I love you, but this, like,
manic pixie dream girl,
1122
01:08:18,621 --> 01:08:19,855
"I don't know
what's going on" thing
1123
01:08:19,888 --> 01:08:21,724
is really starting
to piss me off.
1124
01:08:21,757 --> 01:08:24,225
You forced your way
into that man's life,
1125
01:08:24,258 --> 01:08:26,562
and you made a mess of it, and now that
it doesn't suit your needs anymore,
1126
01:08:26,595 --> 01:08:28,396
you're just going
to walk away.
1127
01:08:28,429 --> 01:08:31,232
You were the one who told me
to keep hanging out with him.
1128
01:08:31,265 --> 01:08:33,770
Yeah, for inspiration,
not to ruin his life.
1129
01:08:33,803 --> 01:08:35,605
And honestly,
the truth is, like,
1130
01:08:35,639 --> 01:08:37,540
this is your M.O.
This is what you do.
1131
01:08:37,574 --> 01:08:39,174
You bail
when things get hard.
1132
01:08:39,208 --> 01:08:40,844
That...
that is not true.
1133
01:08:40,877 --> 01:08:43,479
No? You didn't
bail on Simon?
1134
01:08:43,512 --> 01:08:44,848
He broke up with me!
1135
01:08:44,881 --> 01:08:46,916
You pushed him away
because he didn't fit
1136
01:08:46,950 --> 01:08:49,485
your version
of what an artist should be,
1137
01:08:49,518 --> 01:08:52,187
whatever that means,
after you made him become an artist.
1138
01:08:52,221 --> 01:08:54,390
That is
such bullshit, Kelly.
1139
01:08:54,423 --> 01:08:56,459
Yeah, and there's more,
Sara, okay?
1140
01:08:56,493 --> 01:08:58,461
You think everyone
is a phony.
1141
01:08:58,495 --> 01:09:00,665
Simon's a phony,
Ben and his friends are phony.
1142
01:09:00,698 --> 01:09:03,634
Somehow no one but you is
living their authentic life,
1143
01:09:03,668 --> 01:09:06,671
yet you are writing a book
that you think is beneath you.
1144
01:09:06,704 --> 01:09:08,706
Because you wanted me to!
1145
01:09:08,739 --> 01:09:10,440
I was perfectly happy
representing you
1146
01:09:10,473 --> 01:09:12,943
when you were writing
feminist allegories
1147
01:09:12,977 --> 01:09:15,445
about the mermaid myth
that sold five copies,
1148
01:09:15,478 --> 01:09:18,214
but when I told you that you
could make money writing garbage,
1149
01:09:18,248 --> 01:09:19,717
you jumped at the chance.
1150
01:09:22,319 --> 01:09:24,455
I am telling you this
because I'm your friend.
1151
01:09:24,488 --> 01:09:26,725
Well, it doesn't feel like
you're my friend.
1152
01:09:26,758 --> 01:09:28,359
Well, friendship
doesn't always feel good
1153
01:09:28,392 --> 01:09:29,828
and I know you think
I'm an asshole,
1154
01:09:29,861 --> 01:09:32,531
but you know I am a good friend,
and I am a loyal friend,
1155
01:09:32,564 --> 01:09:35,734
and friends tell each other
the truth, even when it sucks.
1156
01:09:35,767 --> 01:09:37,468
Yeah, well,
this lunch sucks!
1157
01:09:38,970 --> 01:09:40,939
- The food is very good...
- The food is very good.
1158
01:09:40,972 --> 01:09:42,741
This sucks.
1159
01:09:42,774 --> 01:09:45,845
Sara, do you see
the guy over my shoulder?
1160
01:09:45,878 --> 01:09:48,948
- Who, the bartender?
- No. The Buddha.
1161
01:09:48,981 --> 01:09:50,717
Yeah. What about him?
1162
01:09:50,750 --> 01:09:51,984
Do you know what he would say
1163
01:09:52,018 --> 01:09:54,453
if he were to join
this conversation?
1164
01:09:54,486 --> 01:09:56,789
No, I do not.
1165
01:09:56,823 --> 01:09:59,524
He would say, "You need to
follow the Eightfold Path."
1166
01:09:59,559 --> 01:10:01,359
It is the path that teaches us
1167
01:10:01,393 --> 01:10:03,896
the importance of actively
helping others
1168
01:10:03,930 --> 01:10:05,698
to free them
from their suffering.
1169
01:10:05,732 --> 01:10:08,334
Okay. What do you
know about Buddhism?
1170
01:10:08,367 --> 01:10:11,437
A lot, because I am
a Buddhist, so...
1171
01:10:11,471 --> 01:10:12,472
You're a Buddhist?
1172
01:10:13,707 --> 01:10:15,576
You're a Buddhist?
This whole time?
1173
01:10:16,844 --> 01:10:18,579
You...
1174
01:10:18,612 --> 01:10:20,313
You're a Buddhist!
1175
01:10:20,346 --> 01:10:23,249
You're a Buddhist?
1176
01:10:24,651 --> 01:10:25,953
She's a Buddhist!
1177
01:10:27,988 --> 01:10:31,524
You've got to be the worst
Buddhist I've ever seen!
1178
01:10:31,558 --> 01:10:34,696
If you reduce the world
down to atoms and molecules,
1179
01:10:34,729 --> 01:10:36,998
you see that we're all
just one big organism,
1180
01:10:37,031 --> 01:10:41,401
and that what we do as individuals
has an effect on others.
1181
01:10:41,435 --> 01:10:43,303
You have an obligation
to help that man
1182
01:10:43,337 --> 01:10:45,807
because in a way,
you are that man.
1183
01:10:47,041 --> 01:10:48,843
Okay, I...
1184
01:10:48,877 --> 01:10:51,679
I didn't come here to get
confused and lectured at.
1185
01:10:51,713 --> 01:10:53,380
Who would go anywhere
to be confused?
1186
01:10:53,413 --> 01:10:54,749
Like, why would you
pay for that?
1187
01:10:54,783 --> 01:10:56,451
You know what?
You have my book,
1188
01:10:56,484 --> 01:10:57,820
so just leave me alone.
1189
01:11:01,824 --> 01:11:04,459
Ow.
1190
01:11:04,492 --> 01:11:07,362
You should make sure there's
more space between the tables.
1191
01:12:56,844 --> 01:12:58,846
Oh, my God. Hey!
Hey! I know you!
1192
01:12:58,879 --> 01:13:01,048
Hey! Hi!
I know you!
1193
01:13:01,081 --> 01:13:03,050
Can I... No, please.
Can I just ask you a question?
1194
01:13:03,083 --> 01:13:04,551
Please? Please?
Please? Please?
1195
01:13:04,585 --> 01:13:07,588
Well, if it isn't
the DJ wannabe.
1196
01:13:07,621 --> 01:13:09,156
DJ Meow-na Lisa,
right?
1197
01:13:09,189 --> 01:13:12,660
Uh, no, Sara.
But, yeah. Hi.
1198
01:13:12,693 --> 01:13:16,664
I'm not really
a DJ hype cat.
1199
01:13:16,697 --> 01:13:18,666
No shit?
1200
01:13:18,699 --> 01:13:20,602
What do you want?
1201
01:13:20,635 --> 01:13:24,806
I haven't been able to find Godfrey.
DJ Katamine.
1202
01:13:24,839 --> 01:13:28,209
- Have you guys seen him?
- Not for a few weeks.
1203
01:13:28,243 --> 01:13:31,680
It's like he dropped off the
face of the planet or something.
1204
01:13:31,713 --> 01:13:34,015
- What about Shad?
- Shad's in jail.
1205
01:13:34,049 --> 01:13:38,153
- Got caught boosting mixers.
- Shit! Seriously?
1206
01:13:38,186 --> 01:13:40,121
He's going to be in there
for a minute.
1207
01:13:40,155 --> 01:13:42,724
There's got to be something
I can do to help.
1208
01:14:04,146 --> 01:14:05,915
You should've taken
the money.
1209
01:14:05,948 --> 01:14:08,085
What are you doing
down here?
1210
01:14:08,118 --> 01:14:10,120
Bailing your ass
out of jail.
1211
01:14:10,153 --> 01:14:11,621
Oh, yeah, right.
1212
01:14:11,655 --> 01:14:14,658
If you take me to him.
1213
01:14:18,562 --> 01:14:19,963
I'll take you up on that.
1214
01:14:19,997 --> 01:14:22,666
Just to get away
from that crazy mofo.
1215
01:14:22,699 --> 01:14:24,533
He's a baby-faced
serial killer.
1216
01:14:26,036 --> 01:14:27,838
But he looks so normal.
1217
01:14:44,155 --> 01:14:46,691
Maintain the integrity
of the pitch.
1218
01:14:46,724 --> 01:14:49,027
- But put it in your own words. What?
- Mr. Glasser?
1219
01:14:49,060 --> 01:14:51,129
I think there's something
wrong with G-Money.
1220
01:14:58,303 --> 01:15:00,906
He looks fine to me.
1221
01:15:00,939 --> 01:15:03,709
He's in his bathrobe, sir.
1222
01:15:03,742 --> 01:15:06,912
- Does it turn you on?
- Sir?
1223
01:15:06,945 --> 01:15:10,649
Chicken Little?
"The sky is falling."
1224
01:15:10,682 --> 01:15:12,184
Okay, then. Yup.
1225
01:15:12,217 --> 01:15:13,919
What a dick!
1226
01:15:13,952 --> 01:15:18,023
To begin again, press eight
after you hear the beep.
1227
01:15:18,057 --> 01:15:20,727
- Beep!
- I'd like to change my order, please.
1228
01:15:20,760 --> 01:15:23,063
Is this a real person
I'm talking to?
1229
01:15:23,096 --> 01:15:24,998
I am a new beta version
1230
01:15:25,031 --> 01:15:28,001
of an automated voice system
called Cray-bot.
1231
01:15:28,034 --> 01:15:29,936
My name is John.
1232
01:15:29,969 --> 01:15:33,606
Yes, I'd like to cancel my
web-builder package, please.
1233
01:15:33,640 --> 01:15:35,375
Your credit card
has been charged
1234
01:15:35,408 --> 01:15:40,213
- $125.60.
- No!
1235
01:15:40,246 --> 01:15:43,216
As I just said,
I'd like to cancel that order.
1236
01:15:43,249 --> 01:15:50,124
Your credit card has been
charged $125.60.
1237
01:15:52,259 --> 01:15:54,962
That man is
a goddamn genius.
1238
01:15:56,897 --> 01:15:58,833
Hey, everyone,
guess who's here?
1239
01:15:58,866 --> 01:16:01,068
Mr. G's back,
and he's going to play
1240
01:16:01,102 --> 01:16:03,237
some really fun music
for you all.
1241
01:16:10,745 --> 01:16:12,647
Two volunteers,
I guess.
1242
01:16:14,282 --> 01:16:17,085
Okay, you heard Mr. G. Two volunteers.
1243
01:16:18,420 --> 01:16:20,856
Great. You guys
are doing great.
1244
01:16:20,889 --> 01:16:24,226
All right. Great job.
Here you go.
1245
01:16:44,847 --> 01:16:46,215
Hey, Mr. G,
you all right?
1246
01:17:15,946 --> 01:17:17,381
It's weird.
1247
01:17:17,414 --> 01:17:20,852
He's here every day,
but he ain't no character.
1248
01:17:20,885 --> 01:17:24,422
Just like some sort of robot,
talking all monotone and shit.
1249
01:17:24,455 --> 01:17:26,191
It's bad.
1250
01:17:26,224 --> 01:17:29,827
I really messed up,
I'm going to go talk to him.
1251
01:17:37,835 --> 01:17:39,938
Hey, Godfrey.
1252
01:17:39,971 --> 01:17:43,274
I know you're mad at me,
and I don't blame you,
1253
01:17:43,308 --> 01:17:45,344
but I'm really
worried about you.
1254
01:17:55,521 --> 01:17:57,423
Do you need anything?
1255
01:18:00,125 --> 01:18:02,728
I have to go.
1256
01:18:05,364 --> 01:18:09,369
Well, do you want
to, like, DJ tonight or...
1257
01:18:09,402 --> 01:18:11,137
I mean, Shad's back.
1258
01:18:11,171 --> 01:18:14,241
Me and him are going
to break out his new mixer.
1259
01:18:14,274 --> 01:18:17,277
DJ Meow-na Lisa in the house.
You know?
1260
01:18:19,112 --> 01:18:20,780
Look, I know what happened
to your sister,
1261
01:18:20,814 --> 01:18:23,183
and I'm so sorry.
1262
01:18:23,216 --> 01:18:26,920
Those fosters, they were
supposed to protect all of you.
1263
01:18:28,922 --> 01:18:31,157
You have
to forgive yourself.
1264
01:18:44,305 --> 01:18:47,308
- Are you sitting down?
- No.
1265
01:18:47,341 --> 01:18:48,843
Doesn't matter,
because I am.
1266
01:18:48,876 --> 01:18:51,245
Guess what?
Axi loves the book. Yeah.
1267
01:18:51,279 --> 01:18:52,980
They want to get
together right away.
1268
01:18:53,014 --> 01:18:54,215
They want to talk
film rights.
1269
01:18:54,248 --> 01:18:56,485
I can't right now, Kelly.
1270
01:18:56,518 --> 01:18:58,086
What do you mean,
not now?
1271
01:18:58,120 --> 01:18:59,521
You are such a bummer
sometimes.
1272
01:18:59,555 --> 01:19:01,456
Meet me at Axi
tomorrow at 11:00.
1273
01:19:01,490 --> 01:19:03,358
You sell this movie,
the rest of them will follow,
1274
01:19:03,392 --> 01:19:04,560
I promise you.
1275
01:19:04,594 --> 01:19:06,995
- I got to go.
- What the hell, Sara?
1276
01:19:17,439 --> 01:19:19,542
Fantastic stuff,
Sara, really.
1277
01:19:19,576 --> 01:19:24,547
So original, and-and oof!
Compelling.
1278
01:19:24,581 --> 01:19:27,450
So you guys might want
to buckle up here
1279
01:19:27,483 --> 01:19:29,919
because we're so excited.
1280
01:19:29,952 --> 01:19:32,055
We want to do
an initial run of...
1281
01:19:33,389 --> 01:19:34,991
One hundred thousand copies.
1282
01:19:38,094 --> 01:19:43,166
And we're going to up
your advance to $350,000.
1283
01:19:45,069 --> 01:19:46,537
Dollars.
1284
01:19:46,571 --> 01:19:49,039
That's dollars.
Fuck, yeah!
1285
01:19:49,073 --> 01:19:51,208
Also,
1286
01:19:51,241 --> 01:19:54,345
multiple studios are already
calling on the film rights.
1287
01:19:54,378 --> 01:19:57,181
You're going to make some
serious cash money on this.
1288
01:19:57,214 --> 01:19:58,882
Fuck, yeah!
1289
01:19:58,916 --> 01:20:00,918
That is what gets me hard
in the fucking morning!
1290
01:20:00,951 --> 01:20:04,388
Whoo! Boners!
Everyone has boners.
1291
01:20:04,421 --> 01:20:07,425
Oh, my God! I represent
so many shitty writers.
1292
01:20:07,459 --> 01:20:09,094
- Yeah! Whoo!
- I needed this win!
1293
01:20:09,127 --> 01:20:10,528
Oh, I'm so unhappy
in my marriage.
1294
01:20:10,563 --> 01:20:12,364
This is the only
thing I am living for.
1295
01:20:12,397 --> 01:20:15,967
Aren't you fucking pumped?!
Aren't you excited?!
1296
01:20:16,000 --> 01:20:17,969
- She's excited.
- I, uh...
1297
01:20:18,002 --> 01:20:19,638
- She is, we are...
- It's truly...
1298
01:20:19,672 --> 01:20:22,140
- truly needing more money.
- ...unbelievable.
1299
01:20:22,173 --> 01:20:23,475
Unbelievable.
1300
01:20:23,508 --> 01:20:25,310
You guys, if that got
your cocks racing,
1301
01:20:25,343 --> 01:20:28,146
get your seatbelts,
clickity-clack them back in,
1302
01:20:28,179 --> 01:20:29,347
because guess what?
1303
01:20:29,381 --> 01:20:31,216
We've mocked up
some covers to show you.
1304
01:20:31,249 --> 01:20:32,652
If you look on the...
Where are they?
1305
01:20:32,686 --> 01:20:34,453
You've got one job.
1306
01:20:34,487 --> 01:20:36,389
One thing that you do.
There it is. Wow.
1307
01:20:36,422 --> 01:20:38,057
Slowly but surely.
1308
01:20:38,090 --> 01:20:40,159
We've even come up
with some alternative titles.
1309
01:20:40,192 --> 01:20:42,528
Check it out.
Okay, we're going real retro kitschy.
1310
01:20:42,562 --> 01:20:46,298
I'm sorry. That's...
1311
01:20:46,332 --> 01:20:48,267
- Oh, she took it. She took the phone call.
- Hello?
1312
01:20:48,300 --> 01:20:50,936
- Regarding other...
- Shad? I'm sorry. I can't right now.
1313
01:20:50,970 --> 01:20:54,540
Let's stay focused here,
and blonde to blonde.
1314
01:20:54,574 --> 01:20:56,376
- What's going on?
- What type of contingencies
1315
01:20:56,410 --> 01:20:58,078
- are we looking at?
- Okay.
1316
01:20:58,111 --> 01:21:00,080
I have to go. I have to go.
I have to go.
1317
01:21:00,113 --> 01:21:02,082
Where did she go?
Is she still behind me?
1318
01:21:02,115 --> 01:21:04,084
My friend's in trouble.
I'm sorry.
1319
01:21:04,117 --> 01:21:05,485
Excuse me?
1320
01:21:10,056 --> 01:21:12,727
- Do you think she's coming back?
- I-I don't know.
1321
01:21:12,760 --> 01:21:15,195
- Okay. I don't...
- Okay. Oh.
1322
01:21:17,230 --> 01:21:19,500
Because we are not
negotiating right now.
1323
01:21:19,534 --> 01:21:22,203
I will call you
when she is ready.
1324
01:21:22,236 --> 01:21:23,271
Okay.
1325
01:21:24,606 --> 01:21:27,041
- Thank you for being here.
- Of course.
1326
01:21:27,074 --> 01:21:30,311
Why is everyone so tiny
in this office building?
1327
01:21:30,344 --> 01:21:31,613
There he is.
1328
01:21:31,647 --> 01:21:34,081
- Hey, Shad.
- Thanks for coming.
1329
01:21:34,115 --> 01:21:36,718
You know, shit's just getting
way over my head.
1330
01:21:36,752 --> 01:21:39,655
- Who's she?
- Oh, that's my friend, Kelly.
1331
01:21:42,758 --> 01:21:44,226
All right.
1332
01:21:44,259 --> 01:21:47,229
So I'm afraid we're
in kind of a bind here.
1333
01:21:47,262 --> 01:21:48,997
So what's the issue?
1334
01:21:49,031 --> 01:21:50,499
Some parents
noticed
1335
01:21:50,532 --> 01:21:53,101
some odd things
about Mr. G.
1336
01:21:53,135 --> 01:21:57,539
Many of them are wondering
if he might be schizophrenic.
1337
01:21:57,574 --> 01:22:00,409
He's not schizophrenic,
and I will tell you why.
1338
01:22:00,442 --> 01:22:03,178
One, he does not suffer
from visual hallucinations.
1339
01:22:03,212 --> 01:22:06,348
Two, he does not suffer
from auditory hallucinations
1340
01:22:06,381 --> 01:22:09,552
and three, he does not exhibit
signs of delusional behavior,
1341
01:22:09,587 --> 01:22:11,221
so there's that.
1342
01:22:11,254 --> 01:22:13,624
- Is she a doctor?
- She repped Dr. Phil.
1343
01:22:13,657 --> 01:22:17,628
Look, what do I tell
a concerned parent
1344
01:22:17,661 --> 01:22:21,431
who said that she saw him
performing as a cowboy on the street
1345
01:22:21,464 --> 01:22:25,068
and then, less than an hour
later, dressed as a matador?
1346
01:22:25,101 --> 01:22:26,704
What, he can't
perform now?
1347
01:22:26,737 --> 01:22:29,472
If a person is found
mentally unstable,
1348
01:22:29,506 --> 01:22:33,077
obviously they're not going
to be allowed to work
1349
01:22:33,110 --> 01:22:35,412
with any children
in Washington State.
1350
01:22:35,446 --> 01:22:39,083
No, no. Godfrey
is not mentally unstable.
1351
01:22:39,116 --> 01:22:42,319
He is a man dealing with
grief in a profound way.
1352
01:22:42,353 --> 01:22:44,255
He doesn't need
a psych evaluation.
1353
01:22:44,288 --> 01:22:46,123
He needs support,
1354
01:22:46,156 --> 01:22:49,093
and time to process
what he's going through.
1355
01:22:49,126 --> 01:22:50,662
Look...
1356
01:22:50,695 --> 01:22:54,833
I appreciate everything
that has been said here today.
1357
01:22:54,866 --> 01:22:59,639
But if Mr. G doesn't grade out
with his evaluations next week,
1358
01:22:59,672 --> 01:23:01,406
he's done here.
1359
01:23:40,781 --> 01:23:43,785
Hey, y'all!
My name is Cowgirl Cassie.
1360
01:23:43,818 --> 01:23:45,853
Now I'm not really
a performer,
1361
01:23:45,887 --> 01:23:48,890
but today I decided to sing
some songs for y'all
1362
01:23:48,923 --> 01:23:51,325
and for a friend
I'm hoping to see.
1363
01:24:45,982 --> 01:24:47,751
Hey there, young man.
1364
01:24:47,784 --> 01:24:50,787
Why don't you come on up here
and join me on the stage?
1365
01:24:50,820 --> 01:24:55,358
Help me sing this song.
Come on now. Don't be shy!
1366
01:24:55,392 --> 01:24:57,595
Come on up here.
I see you. Come on.
1367
01:24:57,628 --> 01:24:58,929
Get on up here!
1368
01:25:01,966 --> 01:25:04,534
Where you belong.
That's right.
1369
01:25:04,567 --> 01:25:07,404
Oop, what's that?
That's for you.
1370
01:26:16,476 --> 01:26:18,979
Whoo, whoo, whoo!
1371
01:26:22,916 --> 01:26:26,887
Cowboy Cody, everybody!
Give him a round of applause.
1372
01:26:30,791 --> 01:26:32,459
Thank you.
1373
01:26:33,795 --> 01:26:37,065
Well, you got a smile
on your face.
1374
01:26:37,098 --> 01:26:39,566
- That's a good thing.
- You think so?
1375
01:26:39,601 --> 01:26:42,036
Hell, I know so.
1376
01:26:42,070 --> 01:26:43,705
So, we friends again?
1377
01:26:45,974 --> 01:26:49,577
You got retty good for someone who
doesn't perform there, young lady.
1378
01:26:49,611 --> 01:26:51,913
Maybe we should make a duo.
1379
01:26:51,946 --> 01:26:55,517
Yeah, like Faith Hill
and Tim McGraw.
1380
01:26:55,550 --> 01:26:56,886
You could be Faith.
1381
01:26:56,919 --> 01:26:58,319
So if we're going
to be a duo,
1382
01:26:58,353 --> 01:27:00,355
then we're friends
now, right?
1383
01:27:00,388 --> 01:27:03,458
'Cause friends are there
for each other.
1384
01:27:03,491 --> 01:27:06,695
And... I want to help you.
1385
01:27:08,563 --> 01:27:10,532
Like you helped me.
1386
01:27:11,834 --> 01:27:15,537
And I know I haven't met
the real you yet...
1387
01:27:17,840 --> 01:27:20,744
but the truth is,
I'm the one that's the phony.
1388
01:27:20,777 --> 01:27:23,345
I wrote books
I don't care about.
1389
01:27:23,379 --> 01:27:24,915
I was in a five-year
relationship
1390
01:27:24,948 --> 01:27:27,483
that I only pretended
was great.
1391
01:27:27,516 --> 01:27:28,685
I...
1392
01:27:30,419 --> 01:27:33,489
I've been a phony...
to friends,
1393
01:27:33,522 --> 01:27:35,592
to everyone in my life.
1394
01:27:35,625 --> 01:27:38,628
I'm sorry I wasn't honest
with you about the book,
1395
01:27:38,662 --> 01:27:41,965
but I learned so much about
you and myself writing it.
1396
01:27:41,998 --> 01:27:43,567
It changed me.
1397
01:27:54,444 --> 01:27:58,049
Look... you're going to
lose your gig at the school.
1398
01:27:58,082 --> 01:28:00,350
If you don't show them
the real you...
1399
01:28:02,452 --> 01:28:03,988
they're going to cut
you from the program.
1400
01:28:05,555 --> 01:28:07,759
But the school
is willing to work with you
1401
01:28:07,793 --> 01:28:09,527
if you can pull it
together.
1402
01:28:09,560 --> 01:28:11,763
They have counselors there
to help you through this,
1403
01:28:11,797 --> 01:28:13,665
and I could help you.
1404
01:28:14,833 --> 01:28:17,102
You just have
to be yourself.
1405
01:28:19,838 --> 01:28:21,472
So what do you say?
1406
01:28:23,909 --> 01:28:25,509
Let's start over.
1407
01:28:27,478 --> 01:28:28,780
For real this time.
1408
01:28:34,654 --> 01:28:36,155
Hi. I'm Sara.
1409
01:28:52,739 --> 01:28:54,007
Okay.
1410
01:29:00,147 --> 01:29:03,516
Well, then I guess
that's goodbye.
1411
01:29:21,169 --> 01:29:22,569
Wait, Sara?
1412
01:29:24,039 --> 01:29:25,439
Don't leave.
1413
01:29:31,212 --> 01:29:32,714
It's me.
1414
01:29:35,984 --> 01:29:37,484
Godfrey.
1415
01:29:39,654 --> 01:29:41,656
I know who I am
when I'm with you.
1416
01:30:03,003 --> 01:30:08,003
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