What the hell are we promoting here, Jack?
When you've had the belt as long as I have,
people gonna attack you from all angles,
which is why the state fair is gonna be
so darn explosive.
[Ace] Previously onHeels...
He cut a promo in our ring
like he was a goddamn plant.
I've decided to challenge Jack
and Ace in a three-way ladder match.
[Staci] I don't like that man.
I don't like what he brings out in me or you or anyone.
[Jack] You just want us to win.
I just want us to stop having the same fucking conversation.
Dude, you should be a star.
And right now, you aren't one.
[Jack] If you're gonna smoke,
can you do it in the back, please?
We got fans in there buying jewelry.
I was thinking about quitting anyway.
I just feel like I don't have a place right now.
Whose fault is that?
You decided you didn't like
what was written, so you decided to change it.
You lit the match. Don't be pretending
you don't know how fire works, 'cause you do.
[Thomas] Why did he do it?
[Jack] His spirit got broken.
How did his spirit get broken?
[Dick] Your father, Tom,
he was one tough sumbitch, Jack.
Always had to have things his way.
Come clean with me, Jack.
You got some of your old man's anger?
[dramatic music plays]
["Roll with the Changes" playing over radio]
♪ ♪
Oh, man, this is a great song.
Underrated guitar solo.
Saw these guys in '78.
[REO Speedwagon] ♪ Woman, I am willing... ♪
You know what?
Why don't you let me drive the rest of the way?
Why don't you just sit back and relax?
If you drive a little faster, I will.
Staci's got us saving for a vacation.
I'm not risking a speeding ticket.
Then let me get one. I ain't afraid of my wife.
What's up your ass?
Doctor just gave you a clean bill of health.
Well, I didn't need to go all the goddamn way to Atlanta
to get my heart checked.
If I croak, I croak.
I don't think your grandson would see it that way,
so just try and put a smile on your face.
They told you to go see a specialist.
Specialist said that your ticker's good.
Yeah, well, my ticker's gonna blow
if I'm late for this Eddie Earl dinner.
You're not gonna be late for the Eddie Earl dinner.
And I already went by his place yesterday and teed you up.
The fuck for?
Look, I can manage my own sponsors.
I need to plant the seed
that we're gonna need money to fix up the Dome.
If I need help planting fucking seeds,
I'll let you know.
Pull over. I gotta take piss.
Oh, come on, Dad.
There's-there's an exit in a few miles.
I ain't too good for the side of the road, boy.
No son of mine better be either.
[Tom] Now, your mom tells me
you've been quite the farmer boy lately.
[Jack] Don't know what that means.
[Tom] Planting other seeds.
Planting seeds in your brother's head about wrestling.
Well, we were just bullshitting.
[Tom] You don't bullshit, Jack. You're just like me.
You're always operating.
Don't wind Ace up and get him off track, all right?
I-I--hey, I think it's good that Ace is taking an interest
in the family business.
He's got a football scholarship!
It's to a D2 school.
Tony Romo came outta D2!
Ace ain't no Tony Romo.
Hey, you don't know who Ace is gonna be,
-all right? -Well, okay, here's what--
here's what I know right now.
He barely goes to class, doesn't know the plays,
so he's flying by the seat of his pants
on the team and in life.
And despite being freakishly gifted,
he's not very coachable.
But you think you can manage him, huh?
[Jack] I think the DWL needs him.
Hey, Dad, we need him.
We need the young, good-looking, athletic hero
to come after King Spade's throne, Dad.
Look, I already started writing a story--
Don't make me keep fucking telling you, all right?
The DWL is what you and me do.
Ace has a different destiny away from here.
[breathing heavily] Well, then, Dad, Dad,
we need a better plan
than choking down spaghetti with Eddie Earl.
The only footage that we have online
is from people's cell phones in the Dome.
All the guys from your generation
are-are dropping like flies.
We haven't sold out in five years.
I mean, we're one step away from running the show
in the fucking parking lot at a Kmart.
Ebbs and flows, Jack. That's how it goes, all right?
Ebb's here. Flow is soon to come.
Well, then guess what.
Wherever the flow's fucking flowing to,
it needs to start flowing towards us, or we're done.
And you wanna drag your brother
down into this fucking homemade quagmire, huh?
I... I wanna help you
save what you spent your life building
so that then you and me, we can make it thrive.
Well, I tell ya what.
You pin me, and you can have it.
[sighs] Let's get back on the road.
-[grunts] -No.
You put me on the fucking ground
for a three-count,
and I'll sign over the DWL and the Dome to you
free and clear.
You can run it the way you want to,
find out if your way is the better way,
which I fucking doubt.
Oh, ha!
Is Jack Spade afraid of his pops?
[Jack] You know, I know every one of your moves...
but in the real world,
people don't solve their shit by fighting.
Shut the fuck up with that modern-man horseshit
and fucking wrestle me.
-Come on, pussyboy. -Hey.
-Fucking wrestle me! -Hey!
-[Tom] Huh? -[Jack grunting]
Come on!
[somber music plays]
Dad--no!
Come on.
[both grunting]
You don't come for my shit, boy.
[breathing heavily]
♪ ♪
[mellow rock music plays]
♪ ♪
[singer] ♪ I'm not waiting for ♪
♪ The answer ♪
♪ ♪
♪ And I will ♪
♪ Walk in the shore ♪
♪ To find you ♪
♪ To find ♪
♪ The peace that's your own ♪
♪ Where you come from ♪
♪ All that you want ♪
♪ ♪
♪ One that's your own ♪
♪ Place to call home ♪
♪ Won't be ♪
♪ Granted ♪
♪ What is fair in love ♪
♪ Is fair in war ♪
♪ ♪
♪ What is fair in love ♪
♪ Is fair in war ♪
♪ One ♪
♪ To one ♪
♪ What's love ♪
♪ In war? ♪
♪ ♪
[rock music playing over speakers]
♪ ♪
[Paul] Wild Bill just posted
he's definitely on the DWL roster.
Well, I guess Wild Bill's my enemy now too, which is sad,
because he was pretty funny back in the day.
All I remember is, his valets were so fucking hot.
-Mm. -Bunny Boopie?
-Bunny Bombshell. -Bunny Bombshell.
The second they gained weight, they got replaced.
Yeah, until they reappeared
spread-eagle and naked in Penthousemagazine.
That's the thing, guys.
Wrestling has treated women terribly for decades.
We at Dystopia, we're gonna be beacons for a new hope.
Mm. How did Wild Bill fall so far?
Lotta bad decisions, obviously.
-[laughter] -[The Hole] Look, boss.
This is real. DWL's got heat,
and ticket sales are up since Wild Bill signed.
Look at fucking StubHub over here.
How do you know ticket sales are up?
I tried to get tickets up close
so I could heckle the shit out of them.
The closest I can get was row 40.
[Paul] They're gonna bomb. State fair's next week,
and they're still doing fucking tryouts.
They're a joke.
Nah. Jack Spade's a resilient fuck, Paul.
And Wild Bill's got a lot of connections.
This fair pops, Jack wins.
I gotta upgrade my marketing efforts
and finish this fucker off.
♪ ♪
["California Sun" playing]
♪ ♪
[Black River Delta] ♪ I keep a-running ♪
♪ And I'm coming up to ya ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I feel the rhythm while I'm riding next to ya ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Ah, you got me shivering Like a child now ♪
♪ ♪
♪ You keep on burning out My heart ♪
♪ Just like a fire now ♪
♪ ♪
♪ We got these big wheels Turning it all around ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Like a wildfire burning it To the ground ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Down Highway One In the California sunlight ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I'm coming for you ♪
♪ Oh, I'm coming for you ♪
♪ You ♪
♪ ♪
Sorry to show up unannounced.
I've been trying to talk to you, but...
I-I just-- I keep losing my nerve.
So I drove over here to, uh...
to give you this.
[sighs]
I know I really, really messed up
by going off script and all that...
all that then happened. [exhales heavily]
I'm just really ashamed of myself
and my part of that night and my choices.
And I really wanted to apologize to you
at the baptism, but...
...I just--I got stuck.
[somber music plays]
You gave me a chance, and I blew it.
I wrote all this down, uh, in the letter...
just a-about how sorry I am...
...but, uh, also...
...my gratitude.
I may not deserve it,
but if you give me another chance,
I promise I'm never gonna let you down again.
I know I could make an impact at the state fair.
And I have no idea if...
Tricia is still Ace's valet
or how you would even use me.
But I just know that I will show up,
and I'm gonna work my ass off
and prove to you that my regret is real
and that I value this league so much and all of the people.
♪ ♪
Thank you for letting me know.
[Crystal sighs]
[door squeaks open, slams]
I'm sorry, barging in here like this.
Hey, Crystal, you didn't barge.
-[Crystal sighs] -You don't have to apologize.
[rooster crows]
I-it's your life. It's important.
You're a good person.
I'm not so sure that I am.
Well, I may not know you that well, but...
I do know that anyone who can express contrition
in the way that you did is a good person.
Thank you, Staci... [sniffles]
...for, um, the coffee and for saying that.
They're printed on cardstock, man.
That's expensive shit.
Gully made my pecs look jacked.
Gully got a crush on you, D.
-Psh! -Looks like we're all invited
to this party at Gully's mansion.
We should go crack some skulls, man.
-Yeah. -Nah, don't wanna mess
with Rooster's first match.
-Let it be. -Psh.
How'd Gully get so rich?
Family money from up north.
Built on that by coming down South,
selling fishing and hunting shit.
Hoo, I wish I came from money, man.
Nah, Bobby. The less people help you,
the hungrier you are.
I grew up with nothing. Made me better, stronger.
I mean, who cared about me when I was on food stamps?
The government clearly did.
Government didn't do shit for me.
Who you think bankrolls food stamps?
-The banks. -Fuck no.
Food stamps come from taxes, son.
Government-levied taxes paid for government-fed,
government-loved, government-grown
cute little baby Diego.
Gonna have to rethink my biography.
[laughter]
Who prints a flyer on cardstock?
Rich motherfucker.
Rich motherfucker with a crush on me.
Trying to poach you, Diego.
Ways back, before Gully and Dystopia,
there was a little upstart promotion.
They got a couple of our guys.
Remember that, 'Poc?
Oh, yeah. CRAWDAD.
Fucking CRAWDAD.
It's a acronym for Crazy Rassling Assholes
Wrestling Day And--
Dawn and Dusk, which is like day and night,
except dusk is right in between day and night, so not exactly.
Never failed: dudes would leave us,
go wrestle for a few dozen meth heads,
come crawling back to Duffy a few months later.
Back to the family.
To the DWL 'cause, fellas, you know and I know
if you're standing here right now,
it's not for the money,
'cause I can't pay you any fucking money.
I'd pay you if I could pay you.
And I really do hope that one day,
I will be able to pay you for the money,
but if you are here right now, it's 'cause once a week,
you get to get in that ring for a few minutes
and you get to feel like a god.
You get to walk into the Duffy Dome,
and you don't have a job and you don't have a boss
and you don't have a wife up your ass.
I would like a wife up my ass
-or anywhere near my body. -[laughter]
-I'm looking for one, Diego. -There we go, Bobby.
Diego. Look, here, the only person that you answer to
is the crowd.
We got the best crowd, fellas.
And after the state fair, we're gonna have the biggest.
So... I say to Charlie Gully
and his FWD cardstock
the same thing that King Spade would say to CRAWDAD.
Who gives a flying fuck?
[Bobby, laughing] Yeah.
Hey, Jack.
Wild Bill's inside... training.
Oh, let's go and amuse ourselves.
Damn, they even got nice-ass glue.
-[Debbie] You okay, Boss? -[Willie] I'm great.
Just... Bill being back--
I'm great, Debbie.
[grunts]
[Jack] Don't have to pretend that you're training
just to kiss my ass.
[Wild Bill] I don't need to train
to wrestle you two shit bricks,
but I do wanna limber up before our trip to Florida
to beat Charlie Gully's ass.
Not gonna happen.
Son of a bitch desecrated your church.
You can't let that shit stand.
But I shall, because I need to focus
on the biggest main event in the history of the league.
Now, y'all know me.
Normally, I'd hole myself up, write the entire main event,
and piss Staci off.
Piss me off.
Piss Willie off.
-Piss me off. -[Jack] Piss everyone off.
Thank you.
That's not what I wanna do this time.
This time, I would like to have a creative discussion
about the main event.
Then I'll make the final call.
Here's an idea to kick off your discussion.
I should win. End of discussion.
Who could have predicted
that you'd have that perspective?
Says the guy who kept the belt for himself
by deep-dicking me six ways from Sunday.
[Willie] Can we please scour the Earth
and find a new metaphor for betrayal?
I agree, Willie.
I've always considered deep-dicking
to be a reward of sorts, a gift,
something desired with anticipation,
longed for, if I may stretch the metaphor.
[Jack] Ace, you're right.
I've held the belt long enough.
Yeah. Sure.
You're seriously gonna give it up?
Somebody else's turn.
Just a matter of who.
[Wild Bill] Look, I could give a fuck.
I worn hundreds of belts.
This ain't about pride, but y'all know what's what.
You want the biggest pop on the biggest nights,
you put it on the biggest star.
C'est moi.
-[Ace] Bullshit. -[Wild Bill] Excuse me?
Bullshit, man.
The whole point of this thing is making new fans.
Everybody's seen Bill wrestle a thousand times.
Bill winning's the same old fucking story, emphasis on old.
I mean, shit, the guy's speaking French,
which is a fucking dead language.
You should try it in the brothels of Paris.
It's very much alive there.
[Ace] Jack, the tickets we've sold...
I've sold.
...are getting people to follow the posts
and previews and recaps.
They're getting invested.
You're welcome.
And if Bill wins, yeah, they may cheer.
Then they'll never think about us again.
But if the kid pulls off an upset...
I don't know, that feels like something
you maybe wanna come back for.
[Wild Bill] I gave you a gift, Jack,
the gift of my ass.
And you don't look a gift ass in the mouth,
'cause that mouth is my asshole.
Jesus Christ. Willie?
Flip a coin.
Fuck that. It's my turn.
[Wild Bill] Last time it was your turn,
you cried like a little bitch.
Shut your fucking mouth, Bill.
[Jack] Hey, hey, two of you, knock it off.
[tense music plays]
God damn it.
You let me know when you make the right decision, Jack.
♪ ♪
[school bell rings]
[indistinct chatter]
[sighs]
Is he almost done?
Chill. He's thirsty.
So am I.
Get fucked, third grader.
[hall pass clatters]
Say that again, I'm gonna punch you in the face.
I said get fucked.
[grunts]
[scanner beeping]
[Howard] Hardest worker I got.
Hey, Staci, the Earls here, they're looking for you.
[Staci] Oh, hi, Annie. Hey, Eddie.
Hey. Sorry to bother you at work.
Howard, you stay right here. Eddie.
I-I was golfing with Mickey Holloway,
and, uh, I was going on and on about you.
[Annie] He showed Mickey
the video that I took of you singing at the baptism...
-Mm-hmm. -...and Mickey was just
slack-jawed.
He was just playing it over and over
and just welling up and crying real tears, and it was...
Mickey's a softie.
I-I mean, just a bighearted pastry bag of a man.
But he wants you to sing the national anthem
at the Georgia State Rodeo Championship.
-What? -[Annie] Yes.
He runs the whole rodeo,
and he wants you to sing the national anthem.
Staci, that rodeo's on television.
I don't-I don't know what to say.
[all] Say yes.
Well, yes, of course. Yes!
Whoo!
Well, I guess this'll be my first rodeo.
-[laughter] -Isn't she funny?
[cell phone ringing]
Oh, I'm so sorry.
This is Thomas' school. Give me one second.
-[Annie] All right. Okay. -[Staci] Hello.
[Rooster] It's a Friday afternoon in north Florida,
and it is popping, y'all.
I mean, this motherfucker got peacocks walking around,
trying to out-bird the Rooster.
Come on, look. Check this shit out.
Come on, bro. Hey.
Hey, peacock.
[laughs]
North Florida, baby. Let's go.
[dramatic guitar music plays]
♪ ♪
[Jack] You got suspended for a week.
You can't hit people out of anger.
Dad hit Uncle Ace at the hospital.
Uncle Ace broke Bobby's leg.
But that's no excuse for Daddy.
Uncle Ace deserved it. He is bad.
No, he's not bad. He's just--
He's bad and he cries
and people throw Kleenex at him and hate him.
That's all pretend.
No, if it was pretend, people wouldn't be sad
and mad, hurting each other.
It's okay to hurt someone so they'll know you're mad
because of what they did.
If that is truly what you think,
then we have failed you as parents.
Hey, Mister, get back here.
I've gotta go number two.
[Jack] Hurry up.
You hit Ace at the hospital?
Ace broke Bobby's leg
and I had to get through to him.
Well, now your son's getting through the same way.
[Jack] No, he's going after bullies at school
who are a year older.
[Staci] Right, so you think this is cool.
I-I got in plenty of fights when I was a kid.
Because you needed attention.
Because I went to school with assholes.
We're not raising our son to beat people up.
We have lost the thread here, Jack.
He thinks we're lying about wrestling being fake.
-That's reverse Santa Claus. -[huffs]
Look, I get why he thinks that.
Everyone at the DWL's not acting like it's pretend.
Everyone at the DWL is acting like they care
a whole lot about what happens and who it gets to happen to.
Isn't that the point?
Not if it's ruining real-life relationships.
Thomas worshipped Ace.
He's upside down ever since you turned him heel.
Crowd prefers him that way.
Crowd is a bunch of terrible people too...
[scoffs] ...throwing Kleenex, mocking him.
You know, somebody went out there,
bought Kleenex, passed 'em all out.
I don't understand people going out of their way to be cruel.
The fucking appetite for unkindness
is... fucking disturbing.
Crowd's just playing pretend too.
Shows that they're invested.
Invested in being cruel?
It's not a great environment for kids, Jack.
It's life, Staci. It's just good and evil.
Ace wasn't pretending to be sad.
I think we both know that.
Thomas senses it too.
I don't know how much longer Ace'll put up with it.
You okay, honey?
[Thomas] Yes.
You need help in there?
[Thomas] Mom, I'm eight years old!
[Jack laughs]
Oh, hey, I forgot to tell you my news.
[Jack] What's up?
Who do you know who's been asked
to sing the national anthem
at the Georgia State Rodeo Championships?
Hey! How'd that happen?
Eddie's friend saw a video of me singing at church.
Hey, we ought to pop open that nice bottle of wine
I got for my birthday.
-No, that's the good stuff. -Well, we open the good stuff
when we got good news.
I'm so proud of you.
Thank you.
[rock music playing over radio]
♪ ♪
[singer] ♪ Hey, hey ♪
♪ Won't you get yourself My way ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
[sighs]
[cell phone ringing]
[Bobby] Crystal, you're gonna kick ass.
Come on.
I'm nervous.
Yeah, 'cause you care.
But I mean, you got God on your side.
You got me on your side. You got all of us.
Just get in here and kick ass.
Thanks, Bobby. You're the best.
All right, we'll see you in a minute. Bye.
Bobby, when you gon' let her know
that you like her, like her?
Oh, when the time is right, man.
[Apocalypse] Don't wait too long.
Women like her don't stay available.
Drop your nuts and speak up.
-[Debbie] Hello. -[The Dad] Hi.
[Debbie] What's your gimmick?
-[The Dad] I'm The Dad. -The Dad?
Yeah, just your average dad with a passion
for grilling, drinking beer, and kicking ass.
Sign here in case you die.
-Thank you. -'Sup, Crystal?
'Sup, Diego? Debbie?
Oh, uh, hi, Crystal.
Uh, between me and Diego,
we're covered with all the help we need today.
I'm here to try out as a wrestler.
Did you tell anyone?
Well, this is an open tryout, right?
It is. Sign here.
In case I die?
In case you die.
[Willie] All right, men. Time to get started.
[Debbie clears throat] Willie.
Crystal Tyler wants to wrestle.
[Diego] All right, let's go, boys.
Hit the ropes.
["Wake Up!" playing]
[Duckworth] ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I can see you're a dreamer ♪
♪ I can see You're out there sleeping ♪
♪ Little sunshine dreamer ♪
♪ In the fields The wolves are creeping ♪
♪ You don't know There's creatures ♪
♪ Out to take your Sad little spotlight ♪
♪ I hope that It's your season ♪
♪ I hope the rain Don't fall 'til midnight ♪
♪ Right now You're probably wondering ♪
♪ What's happening On your television screen ♪
♪ Please don't be alarmed ♪
♪ Everything is all right ♪
-♪ Wake up ♪ -♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Oh, this is your Wake-up call... ♪
Dystopia!
[roars]
[crowd whooping, cheering]
♪ This is a courtesy warning ♪
♪ Know that the wolves Are swarming ♪
♪ And if it rains tonight... ♪
[laughs] Ace of Spades.
I didn't wanna believe it, but, uh,
he said you'd show up.
That shrewd motherfucker. [laughs]
[Ace] Who is?
I assume the guy you came to talk to,
'cause I assume you didn't come to talk to me.
I didn't come to talk at all.
Well, whatever you came to do, uh,
you can do when he lands, 'cause that's him.
[cheers and applause]
Hey, motherfuckers!
I'm Nozomi. I like your hairstyle.
[Run the Jewels] ♪ Back at it Like a crack addict ♪
♪ Mr. Black Magic Crack a bitch back ♪
♪ Chiropractic, Craftmatic ♪
♪ Big daddy smokin' big Cali In a black alley ♪
♪ In a black Grand Natty... ♪
-Oh, yeah! -[crowd whooping, cheering]
[laughs]
[crowd roaring]
Gully's a little different than your brother, huh?
Hey there, Ice Man.
You here to tell me I'm dangerous?
Nah, I came to kick your ass.
[crowd] Ooh!
You mess with the DWL, you mess with my family.
Take a look, folks.
Feast your eyes on the embodiment of gallantry.
The what?
You drove all the way here to defend your family's honor,
to be a white knight,
do what your cowardly big brother could not do:
put the big, bad fish man in his place.
I'm not a fucking knight.
Well, that's certainly how you present--
bold, fearless, duty-bound.
I'm just saying it's worth mentioning
before you kick my ass.
Why don't you stay?
Drink some of my beer. Smoke some of my weed.
Let's talk about Ace Spade, the hero.
[suspenseful music plays]
♪ ♪
[cheers and applause]
[crowd chanting] Gully is God. Gully is God.
I didn't come up with it, but it's kinda nice.
[crowd chanting] Gully is God. Gully is God.
[both grunting]
Come on.
[The Dad roars]
[Wild Bill] Y'all better look the other way.
I ain't signing jockstraps or jill straps.
[chuckles] That was a good one.
It was stupid.
[The Dad] Uh, ready.
Ready, huh? Well, let's see it, then.
[Willie] Hey, Pippi Longstocking.
I'm not screwing around.
Nor am I.
[man] Come on, killer. Get him!
Lock it up, youth pastor.
-My gimmick's actually The Dad. -Shut your mouth.
Your gimmick is to make me look good
so I can stick a woman you love
who I imagine you call... The Mom.
Now, come on.
Loosen up.
Christ.
Get out. Go sip some microbrews.
Kind of a shame I can't wrestle every match.
[Crystal] Come on.
Ho-ho-ho.
There you go, girlie. You hear the crowd?
I hear 'em.
Hmm.
[tense music plays]
♪ ♪
[snaps fingers]
Aah!
-[panting] -That's good shit.
Slam me.
I don't think I can.
Then get the fuck out of my ring.
♪ ♪
Ooh!
That's enough. Got what I need.
Why don't we have women wrestlers?
[Willie sighs]
[soft music plays]
Way to go, dude.
Thanks.
♪ ♪
[Jack] Sorry, I got delayed.
My... little guy beat the shit out of a bully at school,
but he got suspended for a week
because right now, there's a zero-tolerance policy.
-How'd it go? -Not great.
[Jack] Wasn't anybody any good?
One guy, The Dad. It's a fun gimmick.
The Dad. Well, he's hired,
'cause Rooster's gone, Big Jim's retired,
Bobby Pin's injured, and we need bodies.
Willie, there had to be somebody else that was good.
Crystal Tyler tried out, and honestly, Jack,
she's pretty fucking good.
How many fingers of Maker's Mark
did you put in your mug today?
I know she's small, but she is acrobatic as hell.
And what she's really got is just... it.
You just wanna watch her.
[Jack] I don't wanna watch a valet.
She can be more than that.
Sure, yeah, she could go off script
and have Bobby Pin's legs snapped in two.
Did you forget?
I remember it well.
I remember it was Ace who did the actual snapping.
Oh, okay, so you gotta make a choice right now
between Crystal and Ace, and you're saying
that you choose Crystal, 'cause that's the choice.
They cannot be together anymore, Willie.
It's not safe.
The fans like her just as much as Ace.
Bullshit!
You wanna put her in the main event
with me, Ace, and Bill?
I do.
She's five-foot-nothing.
Five-three. Who gives a fuck? It's fake.
Well, she can't pick me up.
Can she pick up Ace? Can she pick up Bill?
She doesn't have to pick anyone up.
Oh, you think Bob Backlund
could've really beat up Jimmy Snuka?
You write the scripts. Have him lean in
like Andre did for Hulk, for fuck's sake.
And write for the times. I mean, why do you think
the Real Housewives are so popular, huh?
Women can be terrible to other women.
So let's give them the opportunity
to be terrible to each other in the DWL ring.
It's not about what she is.
It's about who she is, and who she is
is the girl who did a number on my little brother.
I see.
I can't put her anywhere near Ace
before the biggest match of his life
and the biggest match of mine.
Well, he sure is lucky to have his big brother
looking out for him.
Wish you were as concerned about how Bill makes me feel.
I'm not concerned about you,
because you're not emotionally immature
and you recognize that Bill represents us
selling out the state fair.
He's a gift of fate.
Fate can twist.
Everybody else sucked.
-[door slams] -[sighs]
You want a cigar?
I didn't come here to smoke cigars or break bread
or play fucking pattycake.
[Gully laughs] First off, you said nothing about pattycake.
Secondly, calm down. I already sent a crew of guys
up there to clean this shit up and restore your façade
to its former fucking rail yard brick elegance.
It's a prank.
Don't tell me you ain't never
toilet-papered somebody's house.
It's a sign of respect, and it got you here
so I could show you my world.
I know all about you.
No, you don't. My world is about F-U-N.
I know how to spell "fun."
You interrupted. F-U-N-C-T-I-O-N-A-L.
The world you are witnessing is functional.
People get along. Yeah, it's fun.
It's also the opposite of life at the DWL,
which appears to be one of those young adult dramas
my daughter spends half her fucking life watching.
Hey, I heard that.
Dad, can I take the Lambo?
-How many drinks you had? -Two.
Wait an hour. Drive slow.
-Uh, Lucy, this is Ace Spade. -[Lucy] I know.
My dad shows us videos of your matches all the time.
-You're really talented. -Uh, thank you.
All right. Bye, honey.
-Make good decisions. -I'll try.
-[Gully shouting] Hey! -[Lucy] Joking.
Daughters, they're the best.
As I was saying, my world is not filled
with intrigue and resentment.
I try to foster a world where dreams can come true.
That's why we're killing it.
We're selling it out.
We got great content,
great matches.
That's why streaming companies
are sniffing around us right now.
You gotta join us, become famous,
fulfill your destiny.
You're nervous, man.
We got better athletes, better story lines.
Our venue would look better on TV than yours.
The last time I was nervous was never.
[laughs] Dude, we're killing it!
The state fair--sold out
because of me, Jack, Wild Bill, Ricky Rabies.
Two old farts and two guys who hate each other.
Can't wait.
You finally winning the belt at the fair?
You gonna stay heel?
I'm better as a heel.
As far as the belt, we're still finalizing the story.
It's wrestling, not Shakespeare.
Yeah, but you can't just flip-flop on characters, man.
Dude, for fuck's sake, man,
people who come out to watch large men
beat each other, they're not intellectuals.
They're not smart like you and me.
Ace, sit down. Seriously.
Let me just talk real talk for five minutes.
You're pissing away your prime.
Come wrestle with my promotion
playing the kind of character you are in real life--
strong, cool, captivating, brave.
My fans would love you. They'd eat your shit up.
I'll give you your own merch. You can make your own money.
It'll all be emblazoned with the word "champ."
Get the fuck out from under Jack's thumb.
He's my brother. I won't screw him like that.
Like he screws you?
You familiar with rule 34?
Rule 34 is the Internet principle that posits
that for any fictional character,
someone somewhere online has drawn them having sex.
Like Hentai, the Japanese shit?
Yes, like Hentai, but Hentai has evolved.
I bookmarked this.
It's disturbing, but do you notice anything?
-Is that me fucking Jack? -No, that's Jack fucking you.
What the fuck, man?
Look, I got no problem with gay shit,
but don't show me that fucking shit.
That's twisted. That's my brother, man.
Why do you think I call my promotion Dystopia?
We live in a fallen world,
a world of smut and shit and violence
and people who traffic in and revel in
dark, twisted shit.
Why are you so obsessed with dark and twisted shit?
Have you ever had the displeasure of having
a fat French-Canadian priest
put his soft hands on your 12-year-old cock?
I have.
It'll give you a point of view about the world.
-That's fucked up, man. -[Gully] Yeah.
And those drawings, that's how people see you, kid:
getting fucked by Jack and kind of enjoying it.
It's sad, and it doesn't have to be that way.
Look, man, party on with us. Stay the night.
See what we're all about.
Walk away knowing you're making an informed decision,
a decision that you make for yourself by yourself.
[dramatic guitar music plays]
[soft music plays]
♪ ♪
[knocking]
[singers] ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
[inaudible speaking]
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
♪ Ooh-ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
[Constance] Hey, Jack, it's Constance Garrity
from the South Georgia State Fair Commission
just following up about the insurance forms.
If you can please email me out a copy ASAP,
we'd appreciate it.
[Tim] Jack, it's Tim. Hey, you just left
before we could go over next week's schedule.
I'm going on a golf weekend in Hilton Head,
and Johnny's got surgery on Tuesday,
so I need you to cover more shifts.
Call me so we can go over it, okay?
No, don't. Just-just text me.
Anyway, okay. Bye.
[Wild Bill] Jack, I got the perfect idea
on how to script the whole fair,
but I'm gonna need to hire a new valet,
and, uh... well, call me--
[Jack screaming] Fuck!
♪ ♪
[sighs] Robin!
Robin, get in here!
Did I not text you to clean this shit up before I got home?
Explain why it's still here.
-I forgot. -[Willie] You forgot.
I did.
-You smoking weed now? -No!
Then how'd you forget? Put your phone down.
I'm looking to find my reminder.
Your reminder to clean up the counter?
I was already at school when you texted me
to clean up the counter, so I set a reminder,
but Dad picked me up after the reminder
had gone off, so I forgot.
[Willie] Terrible, Robin. I mean, honestly, so terrible.
[Ted] There are my two favorite people.
Did you know we raised a daughter
who needs to set a fucking reminder
to remember to clean up her fucking breakfast dishes?
Well, that must be my bad genes, I guess.
Sorry, Robbie.
[Willie] It's fucking pathetic, Ted.
Willie, she's a teenager.
That's no excuse.
Well, we actually learned about how
the teenage prefrontal cortex goes through the process
-of myelination-- -[Willie] Hey!
You better start the fucking process
of cleaning this shit up now.
It's all right. It's okay, darling.
Hey, what's going on?
Turn that off.
Tell me what's bothering you.
Talking bothers me.
This stuff with Jack and Bill still?
No, do not speak to me about that.
I'm speaking with concern and love.
[Willie] It's not coming across that way.
Jesus Christ.
He hasn't been much help.
What can I do to help?
Let me sit without talking.
You know, you can always quit.
[laughs] Oh, God, that's definitely not helping.
[Ted] You do not need these guys.
Leave 'em to their own misery.
Right, right, before all the work pays off.
Willie...
...you wanna know one of the reasons
why I fell in love with you?
'Cause I hate conversations like this?
No, 'cause you live in the present--
not the past, not the future,
right here.
Never too much regret or stress
or planning or worrying.
That may be how it seems, but--
[Ted] I'm with you for the long haul.
But I don't look at it like a haul.
I mean, I look at it like just enjoying the day,
just enjoying another day with Willie Day.
And when you told me that your old friend Bill
needed a place to crash, I welcomed him in.
And when you told me that you wanted me to kick him out,
I booted him in seconds.
If you need me to speak to Jack and speak to Bill--
I don't need anyone speaking for me.
This situation at the DWL-- Tom, Bill, Jack--
has put you in some kind of a undefinable,
I don't know, distress, and it's startling.
I mean, you're drinking way more than you have been.
Deal with it.
Well, that's what I'm trying to do.
Just because the Spade family has staked
their entire identity on this league
doesn't mean that we have to.
You're a talented producer, administrator.
You could work at a theater, college.
In Duffy?
[Ted] Yeah, well, we can move.
Look, I don't wanna talk about this.
I don't wanna talk and I don't wanna listen to you talk.
What, you just prefer to sit and drink?
[exhaling] Yes.
-[Ted] Willie. -[inhales deeply]
Ted...
I don't wanna say things I shouldn't.
Because they're the truth?
-[glass thuds down] -Ted!
Willie, you had a life before me.
I had a life before you.
I understand that Bill's return
has brought some emotions up to the surface.
[clapping forcefully] I don't wanna talk about it!
I told you.
I told you I didn't wanna talk about it,
and you had to go on talking.
I told you! Fucking told you.
Fuck!
[door slams]
[sighs]
[alarm ringing]
[grunts] Excuse me.
[grunts]
[exhales heavily]
-[exhales heavily] -Wake up, sleepy.
Dystopia show day.
Where am I?
Gully mansion.
What time is it?
It's party time.
[electronic music plays]
♪ ♪
-[rap music playing] -[crowd cheering]
[indistinct rapping]
[crowd roars]
Yeah!
[Gully] Get it in there. Let's go! Come on, now!
Yeah, welcome to Dystopia, baby!
[people whooping]
[both moaning, breathing heavily]
[Nozomi speaking Japanese]
-[Ace] Say what? -[Nozomi] I wanna fuck you
-right now. -[Ace] Oh, fuck!
Ah, I'm sorry, can I have the room...
-Why? -...for a sec?
You're just so fucking hot. I just--I gotta call my mom.
-Really? -She's in the hospital.
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
-[speaking Japanese] -What?
I'll say a prayer.
Oh. Thank you.
[distant train bell dinging]
[train horn blows]
[cell phone buzzing]
[buzzing continues]
[laughing] What's up, girl?
Hey, where are you?
FWD, baby.
I'm jumping ship. We're announcing it tonight.
Uh, Jesus, Ace. That's, uh--
[Ace] Fucking sick, right?
Best part is,
I want you to come with me
but, uh, not as my valet.
As my partner in crime or whatever.
A fellow wrestler. I'll talk to Gully.
Shit, he wants me here so fucking badly anyway.
Have you talked to Jack?
Fuck no. Fuck Jack.
I'm done letting him bend me over.
Tonight Gully's bringing me out after the show.
I'm gonna say fuck Jack, fuck the DWL.
I found a new home.
-[overlapping shouting] -[bottle shatters]
Oh, my God. What the hell was that?
That's this dude Bob Wired.
He hits people with barbwire.
Smashes glass over their head or some shit.
Hey, my phone's gonna die,
but, uh, you should make it out if you can.
You know, you can stay at Gully's mansion.
You can have your own room or whatever.
I'm not suggesting anything, but...
if not, just call me tomorrow.
Uh, all right.
Well, hey, be safe, okay?
How's your mom?
Resting.
Shit.
[sighs]
[engine rumbling]
-[indistinct dialogue over TV] -[Staci] Who's here?
[Jack grunts]
It's Crystal.
[indistinct dialogue over TV]
Crystal, at a certain point, dogged tenacity
begins to lose its charm.
We're right in range.
I'm not here to talk about me.
I swear. It's Ace.
[Jack] What about him?
He's at the FWD show with Gully.
Are you fucking with me?
[Crystal] He FaceTimed me, said he's gonna go out
at the end of the show tonight, join the FWD officially.
Say fuck the DWL and fuck you.
Why are you telling me this? What's the angle?
Not everything is an angle.
It is if you're smart, and you are.
I told you, Jack, I care about the DWL a lot.
And I know how important this state fair is for everybody,
but more importantly, I care about Ace.
And even though you're an asshole--
and you are an asshole, Jack-- I don't think
you're gonna let him get hurt like how Gully might.
But I could be wrong.
Just thought I should tell you.
He ain't gonna listen to me.
Uh... Crystal.
Thank you.
[engine turning over]
[Staci] What's wrong? What's going on?
-[Jack] It's Ace. -What happened?
-Is he okay? -[Jack] No.
[Thomas] What's happening with Uncle Ace?
-Jack! -Hey, look, it's not--
[sighs] He's in Jacksonville
with Charlie Gully from Florida Wrestling Dystopia,
who's my biggest rival and a mortal threat to the DWL.
-Oh! [laughs] Jesus, Jack. -[Jack] What?
-I thought it was serious. -It is serious.
Like Ace was hurt.
Staci, come on.
[Staci] Hey, it's movie night.
We opened the wine celebrating my rodeo news.
Staci, if he gets up in Charlie Gully's ring
and he shits on the DWL, we're done and they win.
[Staci] Why can't you just let him go
if that's what he wants?
Because he doesn't know what's good for him.
-And you do? -Yes.
I do.
-[sighs] -I love you.
Hey, love you.
Don't wait up.
[somber music plays]
♪ ♪
-[line rings] -[Ace] This is Ace.
Leave a message and I'll hit you back.
Shit!
♪ ♪
All right, stay here, boo. I'll be right back.
[Thomas] Mom.
I think I got into the fight because I'm sad.
Sometimes I feel like my spirit is broken...
like Grandad Spade.
You know, I feel mad and sad sometimes too.
That's a terrible feeling.
Hey, but we're gonna fix that. All right?
I promise, 'cause you're my best boy.
You're my love.
I'm really glad you told me this.
It's important to tell people how you feel
because then it doesn't stay all bottled up.
It gets to go out into the world.
That's a good thing.
Hey, why don't you help Mommy run some errands?
Can you do that?
Good, 'cause I could sure use your help.
Hey, Howard.
Hey, Staci. Hey, Thomas.
I need your help with something.
Sure thing. What's up?
[keyboard clacking]
[Howard] Yeah, we got a bulk purchase
of these Kleenex packets right here.
Um, purchase order came
from the Duffy Wrestling League account.
Picked up in-store by Jack Spade.
[heavy music plays]
♪ ♪
[crowd roaring]
[groaning]
Rooster time!
[crowd roaring]
One, two, three!
-Yeah! -[bell dings]
[singer] ♪ He's Rooster ♪
Yeah!
[hip-hop music playing over speakers]
♪ ♪
[singer] ♪ He's Rooster ♪
[crowd chanting] Rooster! Rooster!
Rooster! Rooster!
[singer] ♪ He's Rooster ♪
Hey, man. Got this for you.
Welcome to Dystopia.
[Ace] Thanks, man.
It's beautiful, ain't it?
Two hours of mayhem. Let's bring it home.
[Ace] Yes, sir.
Yeah, Rooster's awesome.
Yes, he is. We put the belt on him tonight,
but next week, it's gonna be yours.
I wanna do a pop-up show same night as the state fair.
Uh... I don't-I don't need it right away.
Why not?
Shouldn't we, uh, build it up a little, you know?
And Rooster probably deserves it for a little while.
Rooster's just the bait, son.
You're the fish.
-Really appreciate you, Gully. -Love ya, pal.
[Rooster chuckles]
Top that, little bitch.
[rock music playing over speakers]
♪ ♪
[cheers and applause]
[crowd chanting] Gully is God! Gully is God!
What a fucking night!
[crowd roaring]
Florida Wrestling Dystopia forever!
[crowd chanting] Forever! Forever! Forever!
Forever! Forever!
All right, now...
...There's a rumor floating around...
-[scattered cheering] -...a rumor that we have
a visitor from out of town.
[crowd chanting] Ace! Ace! Ace! Ace!
[Gully] Oh, so you've heard the rumor too?
[cheers and applause]
Can you imagine the roar
if the Ace of Spades walked down that ramp right now?
[cheers and applause]
I bet you'd be able to hear that roar
all the way up in Duffy.
[cheers and applause]
[dramatic music plays]
♪ ♪
Sorry to say...
sorry to say the rumors aren't true.
-[crowd groans] -Yeah.
You know, your friend Charlie Gully
only has so many surprises up his sleeve.
[crowd chattering]
That's your cue, Ace.
But just when you think that the fish ain't biting...
-[whooshes] -[crowd yelling]
That's when you feel a tug!
[crowd booing]
Whoa!
Hey, hey that's no way to treat a guest.
Ladies and gentlemen, our legendary nemesis,
Mr. Jack Spade.
[crowd groans]
[crowd booing]
You piece of shit.
Don't come for my shit, boy.
["Roll with the Changes" playing]
♪ ♪
[Rooster] Man, y'all got a fucked-up family.
[laughs]
♪ ♪
-Somebody get that motherfucker! -[crowd roars]
[REO Speedwagon] ♪ As soon as you are able ♪
♪ Woman, I am willing ♪
♪ To make the break That we are on the brink of ♪
♪ My cup is on the table ♪
♪ Our love is spilling ♪
♪ Waiting here for you To take a drink of ♪
♪ ♪
♪ So if you're tired ♪
♪ Of the same old story ♪
♪ Oh, turn some pages ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I'll be here When you are ready ♪
♪ To roll with the changes ♪
♪ Baby, roll with the changes ♪
♪ Oh, you know, you know You know you got to ♪
♪ Keep on rolling ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ ♪