1
00:00:06,807 --> 00:00:09,808
[ laughing ]
2
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:11,944
[ screams ]
3
00:00:11,946 --> 00:00:13,211
♪♪
4
00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:14,546
Let's just get this started.
5
00:00:14,548 --> 00:00:16,148
Q: Are you [bleep]
kidding me?
6
00:00:16,150 --> 00:00:17,215
Who's a good girl?
7
00:00:17,217 --> 00:00:19,751
[ laughing ]
8
00:00:19,753 --> 00:00:21,620
[ cymbals crash ]
9
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,888
♪♪
10
00:00:23,890 --> 00:00:25,290
[ laughter ]
11
00:00:25,292 --> 00:00:26,959
With special guest,
12
00:00:26,961 --> 00:00:29,694
"Saturday night live" alum
bobby moynihan.
13
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:31,830
I'm the friend who
needs to go see incubus.
14
00:00:31,832 --> 00:00:35,700
[ laughter ]
15
00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:37,169
Today, we're posing
as supervisors
16
00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:38,570
At a telemarketing firm,
17
00:00:38,572 --> 00:00:41,373
And we've hired someone
to make cold calls for charity.
18
00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,041
We'll be "helping"
the new employee
19
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,109
By giving them
ridiculous sales tips
20
00:00:45,111 --> 00:00:47,045
To keep the person
on the other line interested.
21
00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:48,580
Of course, the tips
we give to the employee
22
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:51,049
Will actually be given to us
by the other guys
23
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:52,651
And the guy
who gets his employee
24
00:00:52,653 --> 00:00:55,720
To follow
the most tips wins.
25
00:00:55,722 --> 00:00:58,123
Oh, hi,
mrs. Quinn.
26
00:00:58,125 --> 00:01:01,259
♪♪
27
00:01:01,261 --> 00:01:02,995
Q: [ chuckles ]
here we go.
28
00:01:02,997 --> 00:01:04,863
Everybody there is
dressed for work
29
00:01:04,865 --> 00:01:07,732
Except tina's dressed like
she's going to the beach.
30
00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:12,737
In fact, murr, tina's your only
real competition in this office.
31
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,939
She's an up-and-comer,
man.
32
00:01:14,941 --> 00:01:17,075
[ laughter ]
33
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:19,411
A little office rivalry
right off the top.
34
00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:21,546
Alright, murr,
here comes your telemarketer.
35
00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:23,748
You're a supervisor today,
and you've got to get her
36
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:24,883
To say whatever
we tell you.
37
00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:26,284
Hi.
38
00:01:26,286 --> 00:01:27,352
Are you james?
I am.
39
00:01:27,354 --> 00:01:28,620
And answering
the phones
40
00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:31,756
Will be our "impractical jokers"
writers room.
41
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,625
Welcome to
our humble office.
42
00:01:33,627 --> 00:01:34,693
Tina, just turn around
and be like,
43
00:01:34,695 --> 00:01:35,960
"could you guys
keep it down?"
44
00:01:35,962 --> 00:01:37,830
Just chat him up...
45
00:01:37,832 --> 00:01:39,097
Can you
keep it down?
46
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,833
Tina...
47
00:01:40,835 --> 00:01:42,668
[ laughter ]
48
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,971
Try john valentine,
okay?
Okay.
49
00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:48,640
I remember I spoke
to them last year.
50
00:01:48,642 --> 00:01:50,642
I spoke to that
family last year.
51
00:01:50,644 --> 00:01:52,044
And the way that
I got them to donate
52
00:01:52,046 --> 00:01:54,513
Was I accused them
of hating children.
53
00:01:54,515 --> 00:01:57,982
The way I got them to donate was
that I actually accused them
54
00:01:57,984 --> 00:01:59,784
Of hating children.
55
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,186
And remember, linda.
56
00:02:01,188 --> 00:02:02,187
And remember,
linda...
57
00:02:02,189 --> 00:02:04,456
It's not a lie
if you believe it.
58
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:08,192
It's not a lie
if you believe it.
59
00:02:08,194 --> 00:02:10,862
Okay. Yeah.
60
00:02:10,864 --> 00:02:13,398
[ laughter ]
61
00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,267
She went from a smile
to a deadpan.
62
00:02:15,269 --> 00:02:16,668
Let's see.
Let's see.
[ phone ringing ]
63
00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:18,470
John valentine:
Hello?
Hello.
64
00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:21,206
Am I speaking to
mr. John valentine?
65
00:02:21,208 --> 00:02:22,474
Speaking.
66
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:26,745
We'd love to have you consider
renewing your subscription.
67
00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:27,812
How much would
that cost?
68
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:29,882
Would be like, $35.39.
69
00:02:29,884 --> 00:02:31,884
I don't think it was
that much at the time.
70
00:02:31,886 --> 00:02:33,618
Sounds like you hate
children to me.
71
00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:38,022
It sounds like you hate
children to me, linda.
72
00:02:38,024 --> 00:02:40,158
I'm just thinking,
if you don't hate children,
73
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,693
Maybe you want to
donate.
74
00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:49,233
Q: Look at tina!
75
00:02:49,235 --> 00:02:51,703
Murr, tell her to say,
"I'll match whatever you do."
76
00:02:51,705 --> 00:02:54,239
Tell him that you'll match
whatever he donates.
77
00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:56,708
We'll match whatever
you choose to donate.
78
00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:58,977
Okay, that's good information
I can give to my wife.
79
00:02:58,979 --> 00:03:00,779
Tell him that he's being
a big baby about this.
80
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:02,714
Linda, he doesn't need
to talk to his wife.
81
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:05,249
Tell him he's being a big baby.
He can make the decision.
82
00:03:05,251 --> 00:03:06,451
I can't say that.
Yes, you can say it,
linda.
83
00:03:06,453 --> 00:03:07,852
You're the salesperson.
84
00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:11,055
It's not a lie
if you believe it.
85
00:03:11,057 --> 00:03:12,524
Well, I was
just thinking,
86
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:15,593
You can probably make
this decision by yourself.
87
00:03:15,595 --> 00:03:17,061
Big baby. Big baby.
88
00:03:17,063 --> 00:03:18,663
You don't really
need her approval.
89
00:03:18,665 --> 00:03:20,599
I know she did enjoy it,
but I feel like I do need it.
90
00:03:20,601 --> 00:03:22,134
Tell him not to be a big baby.
91
00:03:22,136 --> 00:03:24,068
Sal: Please say it, linda.
Please say it, linda.
92
00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:25,403
He's just hectoring her.
93
00:03:25,405 --> 00:03:28,740
To get back to my point,
you don't want to seem like
94
00:03:28,742 --> 00:03:30,542
You have to ask your wife
for everything
95
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,444
And be a baby
about it.
96
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:39,417
Would you like to pledge now
and we can send you the email?
97
00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:41,619
Slice his throat.
98
00:03:41,621 --> 00:03:44,489
Linda: You want to stand up
to this thing and take a stand.
99
00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:45,623
[ quietly ]
slice his throat.
100
00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:47,359
You can just make
a decision now.
101
00:03:47,361 --> 00:03:51,096
Listen, you piece of shit,
are you in or not?
102
00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:56,368
Say to him
"listen, you piece of [bleep]
103
00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:57,502
Are you going to donate or not?"
104
00:03:57,504 --> 00:03:59,037
I can't say that.
Yes, you can.
105
00:03:59,039 --> 00:04:00,572
I can't say that.
He's on the edge.
106
00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:02,440
Go for it. Go for it.
107
00:04:02,442 --> 00:04:05,243
Well, john,
you seem to be
108
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:09,047
Riding
on the fence right now.
109
00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:11,316
I think you could probably
do a hundred, right?
110
00:04:11,318 --> 00:04:14,452
Why not? I'm a big
piece of [bleep] anyway.
111
00:04:14,454 --> 00:04:15,987
[ laughter ]
112
00:04:15,989 --> 00:04:17,722
I told you, linda!
113
00:04:17,724 --> 00:04:19,257
I told you
it was going to work.
114
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,792
I know a piece of shit
when I hear it.
115
00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:22,794
That guy's
a piece of shit.
Okay.
116
00:04:22,796 --> 00:04:24,328
Okay, bye-bye.
117
00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:25,530
Yes, linda!
Oh, man.
118
00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:26,999
You're driving me nuts.
119
00:04:27,001 --> 00:04:28,466
[ laughter ]
120
00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:30,134
Boom! 100 bucks!
121
00:04:30,136 --> 00:04:31,269
[bleep] you, tina!
122
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:33,271
[ laughter ]
123
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,207
♪♪
124
00:04:35,209 --> 00:04:37,009
Hey, how you doing?
I'm brian.
125
00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:40,144
Come on in.
Have a seat, my friend.
126
00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:42,414
So we'll try
joe imburgio.
127
00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:44,148
Before you hit
the last digit, say,
128
00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:45,884
Joe imburgio,
I'm gonna get ya.
129
00:04:45,886 --> 00:04:47,285
Q: When you
dial the number, right?
130
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:48,420
What we like to say
is, like,
131
00:04:48,422 --> 00:04:51,355
"I'm coming for you,
joe imburgio!"
132
00:04:51,357 --> 00:04:52,424
Yeah.
133
00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:53,758
I want to hear it,
eduardo.
134
00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:55,027
Coming for you,
joe imburgio.
135
00:04:55,029 --> 00:04:56,494
Yes!
136
00:04:56,496 --> 00:04:58,763
Murr:
Alright, there's one, q.
137
00:04:58,765 --> 00:04:59,764
Hello?
138
00:04:59,766 --> 00:05:01,033
Yes, hi.
My name is eduardo.
139
00:05:01,035 --> 00:05:03,435
I'm with
tri-state quarterly magazine.
140
00:05:03,437 --> 00:05:05,169
Sal: Joe, say, what the [bleep]
you talking about?
141
00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:07,371
What the [bleep]
are we talking about again?
142
00:05:07,373 --> 00:05:08,506
What is this?
143
00:05:08,508 --> 00:05:10,242
This is
tri-state quarterly.
144
00:05:10,244 --> 00:05:12,376
Q, get him to say
that you're exhausted
145
00:05:12,378 --> 00:05:14,646
With dealing with these
small change chumps all day.
146
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:16,380
We're gonna get him. We're gonna
reel him in, me and you.
147
00:05:16,382 --> 00:05:17,315
He's gonna
make a donation.
148
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:18,583
We're going to save
those kids.
149
00:05:18,585 --> 00:05:19,851
What kids?
150
00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:20,852
The kids.
151
00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:22,987
We like to shame him
a little bit,
152
00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:24,456
So just say,
"I've been dealing with
153
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:26,658
Small change
chumps all day."
154
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:27,992
Watch what he does.
155
00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:29,061
Okay, mr. Imburgio?
156
00:05:29,063 --> 00:05:30,462
Yeah. Hello?
157
00:05:30,464 --> 00:05:31,730
Yeah, I'm sorry.
158
00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:36,068
I've been dealing with
so many small change chumps.
159
00:05:36,070 --> 00:05:38,136
I don't know how much
to give.
160
00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:39,671
Do you know what's
an appropriate amount?
161
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,806
$500.
$500 would be
sufficient.
162
00:05:41,808 --> 00:05:43,475
That's a little steep.
163
00:05:43,477 --> 00:05:45,543
Sal: "we know
where you live."
164
00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:47,879
Just say, "I would like
to remind you
165
00:05:47,881 --> 00:05:49,681
That we know
where you live."
166
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:51,683
Light threat.
Go.
167
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:54,286
I would like to --
I would like to remind you, sir,
168
00:05:54,288 --> 00:05:56,154
That we know
where you live.
169
00:05:58,759 --> 00:05:59,891
Is that a threat, sir?
170
00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:01,159
No.
Light threat.
171
00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:04,562
It's just
a friendly reminder.
Light threat.
172
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:07,031
Eduardo, you got to tug
at the heart strings now.
173
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:08,633
Now we're gonna
tug at the heartstrings.
174
00:06:08,635 --> 00:06:09,901
Do you have any pets?
175
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:11,436
No, but, I mean,
I've had pets.
176
00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:13,371
Remember when they died
and bring that feeling up.
177
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,640
So we're gonna say that your
pet just died at the office,
178
00:06:15,642 --> 00:06:17,108
And that's why you sound
like you're crying.
179
00:06:17,110 --> 00:06:19,211
That's it.
That's it! Okay.
180
00:06:22,248 --> 00:06:24,115
I'm a little --
I'm a little sad, sir,
181
00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:26,785
Because my dog
just died.
182
00:06:26,787 --> 00:06:28,720
I was wondering, sir,
it would ease my pain
183
00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:32,724
If you can donate $600
instead of $500.
184
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:35,259
I could go up to like...
$700, maybe?
185
00:06:35,261 --> 00:06:36,995
I still know
where you live.
186
00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:39,463
I still know where you live,
and I want you to know
187
00:06:39,465 --> 00:06:43,802
That I'm going to a psychiatrist
who's analyzing me,
188
00:06:43,804 --> 00:06:46,404
Because I think
I'm a little sick in my mind.
189
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,606
Oh, my god!
190
00:06:48,608 --> 00:06:50,808
Sal: Let's do $1,000.
Yes or no, bitch?
191
00:06:50,810 --> 00:06:52,476
Let's do $1,000.
Let's do $1,000.
192
00:06:52,478 --> 00:06:53,477
What do you say,
bitch?
193
00:06:53,479 --> 00:06:54,679
What do you say,
bitch?
194
00:06:54,681 --> 00:06:56,948
[ laughter ]
195
00:06:56,950 --> 00:06:58,416
You know what I say?
196
00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,817
Yes.
197
00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:01,219
A hundred times, yes.
198
00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:03,155
Someone will get back to you,
bitch, and then hang up.
199
00:07:03,157 --> 00:07:06,490
Somebody's gonna get back
to you, bitch.
200
00:07:06,492 --> 00:07:07,692
[ laughter ]
201
00:07:07,694 --> 00:07:08,893
[bleep], sal!
202
00:07:08,895 --> 00:07:11,295
The children are saved!
203
00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:13,698
♪♪
204
00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:15,099
How are you doing?
What's your name?
205
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,502
Jennifer.
Alright,
here's your new salesperson.
206
00:07:17,504 --> 00:07:20,572
So there are some things that
we do that universally work.
Okay.
207
00:07:20,574 --> 00:07:22,774
Laugh super hard
at anything they say.
208
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:25,509
Laugh as hard as you
can at anything they say.
209
00:07:25,511 --> 00:07:26,444
Murr:
She's on board!
210
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,713
Johnna,
you laugh crazy.
211
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:29,581
Match her energy.
212
00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:31,183
She starts laughing,
you laugh.
213
00:07:31,185 --> 00:07:34,185
Hello?
It's jennifer calling
from tri-star quarterly.
214
00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:35,253
How are you,
my dear?
215
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:37,655
Oh, I'm surviving,
you know?
216
00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:39,191
[ laughs ]
217
00:07:39,193 --> 00:07:41,526
We're in the same boat,
my dear.
218
00:07:41,528 --> 00:07:44,596
[ both laugh ]
219
00:07:44,598 --> 00:07:47,131
[ laughter continues ]
220
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:49,401
Tell her to say,
"shut up and listen to me.
221
00:07:49,403 --> 00:07:51,069
There's not
a lot of time left."
222
00:07:51,071 --> 00:07:52,670
It's time to go
from soft to firm.
223
00:07:52,672 --> 00:07:55,139
As soon as you click this, just
say, "shut up and listen to me.
224
00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:56,208
There's not
a lot of time."
225
00:07:56,210 --> 00:07:57,675
Oh, my god.
I can't.
You can!
226
00:07:57,677 --> 00:08:01,813
♪♪
227
00:08:05,538 --> 00:08:07,072
It's time to go
from soft to firm.
228
00:08:07,074 --> 00:08:08,073
As soon as
you click this,
229
00:08:08,075 --> 00:08:09,607
Just say,
"shut up and listen to me.
230
00:08:09,609 --> 00:08:10,608
There's not
a lot of time."
231
00:08:10,610 --> 00:08:12,410
Oh, my god. I can't.
Oh, you can.
232
00:08:12,412 --> 00:08:15,212
[ laughter ]
233
00:08:15,214 --> 00:08:16,614
[ laughter continuing ]
234
00:08:16,616 --> 00:08:19,617
So shut up and listen to me.
I don't have a lot of time.
235
00:08:19,619 --> 00:08:20,952
[ jennifer laughing ]
236
00:08:20,954 --> 00:08:23,354
Yeah, I just don't know if
I want to pledge or not.
237
00:08:23,356 --> 00:08:24,622
Tell her, "I don't have
a lot of time left
238
00:08:24,624 --> 00:08:26,023
On this earth."
239
00:08:26,025 --> 00:08:28,693
Just say, "I don't have a lot
of time left on this earth."
240
00:08:28,695 --> 00:08:32,497
Um, I don't have a lot of time
left on this earth.
241
00:08:32,499 --> 00:08:35,166
So what were
you thinking?
242
00:08:35,168 --> 00:08:36,768
No, sorry, I didn't --
I didn't know that.
243
00:08:36,770 --> 00:08:41,038
So you tell me
what I should donate.
244
00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:43,040
Okay, how's $24,000?
245
00:08:43,042 --> 00:08:44,575
[ laughter ]
246
00:08:44,577 --> 00:08:45,843
Murr: $24,000?
247
00:08:45,845 --> 00:08:47,178
Can I ask you a question?
248
00:08:47,180 --> 00:08:48,513
Sure.
249
00:08:48,515 --> 00:08:53,184
I guess, why is
time running out for you?
250
00:08:53,186 --> 00:08:55,386
Well, it's a condition
that I have.
251
00:08:55,388 --> 00:08:56,454
Q:
You got bit by a tick.
252
00:08:56,456 --> 00:08:57,655
Bit by a tick.
253
00:08:57,657 --> 00:08:58,923
Johnna,
start laughing.
254
00:08:58,925 --> 00:09:01,726
It's an autoimmune --
I got bit by a tick.
255
00:09:01,728 --> 00:09:04,129
[ laughing ]
laugh, laugh.
256
00:09:04,131 --> 00:09:05,764
[ both laughing ]
257
00:09:08,135 --> 00:09:10,267
It's lyme disease.
It's lyme disease.
258
00:09:10,269 --> 00:09:11,336
Lyme disease!
Yeah.
259
00:09:11,338 --> 00:09:12,804
With
rheumatoid arthritis.
260
00:09:12,806 --> 00:09:14,605
Q: Oh,
she's going rogue!
261
00:09:14,607 --> 00:09:15,940
Yeah.
Okay, 10 grand.
262
00:09:15,942 --> 00:09:17,142
You will? Oh, my god!
263
00:09:17,144 --> 00:09:19,076
Murr: Sal, you're not
happy with 10 grand!
264
00:09:19,078 --> 00:09:20,411
Okay, hold on.
Okay.
265
00:09:20,413 --> 00:09:21,412
Okay, let's do it.
266
00:09:21,414 --> 00:09:23,014
Hear me now.
She'll go higher.
267
00:09:23,016 --> 00:09:26,017
Listen.
268
00:09:26,019 --> 00:09:28,886
Listen, listen.
Tell me what
to tell her.
269
00:09:28,888 --> 00:09:31,756
Hear me now.
270
00:09:31,758 --> 00:09:33,158
If she does 10 grand,
she'll do more.
271
00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:34,159
Trust me right now.
272
00:09:34,161 --> 00:09:37,829
Don't be a pussy.
Donate 24.
273
00:09:37,831 --> 00:09:41,098
[ laughter ]
274
00:09:41,100 --> 00:09:42,567
Just don't be a pussy.
275
00:09:42,569 --> 00:09:45,837
Don't -- you know,
don't be a --
276
00:09:45,839 --> 00:09:47,839
P-u-s-s-y.
277
00:09:47,841 --> 00:09:50,308
[ laughter ]
278
00:09:50,310 --> 00:09:52,577
Oh, okay. I'll do 25 grand.
279
00:09:52,579 --> 00:09:55,913
Oh, my god.
I love you.
280
00:09:55,915 --> 00:09:58,449
I ain't no p-u-s-s-y.
281
00:09:58,451 --> 00:09:59,650
I know you're not.
282
00:09:59,652 --> 00:10:00,852
I know you're not!
283
00:10:00,854 --> 00:10:02,387
I know, I grew up with brothers.
Forget about it.
284
00:10:02,389 --> 00:10:03,188
My brothers
were pussies.
285
00:10:03,190 --> 00:10:05,656
And my brothers
were pussies.
286
00:10:05,658 --> 00:10:07,658
[ laughter ]
287
00:10:07,660 --> 00:10:08,659
Not us!
288
00:10:08,661 --> 00:10:10,795
Well done.
He got every one!
289
00:10:10,797 --> 00:10:11,997
We did it!
290
00:10:11,999 --> 00:10:14,799
[ both laugh ]
291
00:10:14,801 --> 00:10:18,335
♪♪
292
00:10:18,337 --> 00:10:19,804
Narrator:
Ring, ring. Who's calling?
293
00:10:19,806 --> 00:10:23,875
Murr's first up
on the loser board.
294
00:10:23,877 --> 00:10:25,276
Today we're at
the grocery roll,
295
00:10:25,278 --> 00:10:27,212
Shopping with our
misbehaving child.
296
00:10:27,214 --> 00:10:28,813
While our kid
is being a brat,
297
00:10:28,815 --> 00:10:30,481
We're gonna have
to get another shopper
298
00:10:30,483 --> 00:10:31,816
To be the bad guy
299
00:10:31,818 --> 00:10:34,419
And follow our lead
in disciplining that child.
300
00:10:34,421 --> 00:10:36,221
If that shopper
doesn't agree with your threat,
301
00:10:36,223 --> 00:10:37,422
You lose.
302
00:10:37,424 --> 00:10:40,091
Sheee-ut u-u-u-up!
303
00:10:40,093 --> 00:10:45,162
♪♪
304
00:10:45,164 --> 00:10:47,298
Alright, fellas.
Let's have a good challenge.
305
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:49,567
Q: What is that?
What is --
306
00:10:49,569 --> 00:10:51,236
Do you have
a pearl necklace on?
307
00:10:51,238 --> 00:10:53,238
This is harry styles.
It's his style, man.
308
00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:55,640
You don't even know
who harry styles is.
309
00:10:55,642 --> 00:10:57,709
I don't.
I don't know who he is.
310
00:10:57,711 --> 00:10:59,510
Here's my kid,
if you guys will excuse me.
311
00:10:59,512 --> 00:11:01,979
Avery, what's up?
312
00:11:01,981 --> 00:11:03,048
Hi, I'm dad.
313
00:11:03,050 --> 00:11:05,316
Okay, get ready
to misbehave.
314
00:11:05,318 --> 00:11:06,984
Go, go.
315
00:11:06,986 --> 00:11:09,186
[ avery wailing ]
316
00:11:09,188 --> 00:11:10,722
Why??
317
00:11:10,724 --> 00:11:12,790
Avery, please --
318
00:11:12,792 --> 00:11:14,525
I just want sweets!
319
00:11:14,527 --> 00:11:16,060
Please, please, quiet up.
Please quiet down.
320
00:11:16,062 --> 00:11:18,796
Do you want to
make my life miserable?
321
00:11:18,798 --> 00:11:20,298
Oh, my god!
322
00:11:22,068 --> 00:11:24,535
Right? Do me a favor.
Get my back here, okay?
323
00:11:24,537 --> 00:11:26,271
Avery, come here.
Come here right now.
324
00:11:26,273 --> 00:11:28,473
You come here right now
and talk to daddy.
325
00:11:28,475 --> 00:11:32,209
Listen, if you don't behave
in this store...
326
00:11:32,211 --> 00:11:36,347
This person will
turn you italian.
327
00:11:36,349 --> 00:11:40,485
This person
will turn you italian.
328
00:11:40,487 --> 00:11:41,953
Is that what you want?
329
00:11:41,955 --> 00:11:43,955
You want to be
italian your whole life?
330
00:11:43,957 --> 00:11:45,823
No. Right? No.
331
00:11:45,825 --> 00:11:47,024
I don't want to be
greasy!
332
00:11:47,026 --> 00:11:48,893
[ crying ] I don't want
to be greasy!
333
00:11:48,895 --> 00:11:52,563
[ laughing ]
334
00:11:52,565 --> 00:11:53,898
Tell her, sir,
what you're gonna do to her
335
00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:54,899
If she doesn't behave.
336
00:11:54,901 --> 00:11:56,834
I hate pasta!
Let him talk.
337
00:11:56,836 --> 00:11:57,802
What are you gonna
do to her?
338
00:12:00,239 --> 00:12:01,572
Right?
[ gasps ]
339
00:12:01,574 --> 00:12:03,308
Q:
This guy's nefarious!
340
00:12:03,310 --> 00:12:05,910
You know what happens
to italians, right?
341
00:12:05,912 --> 00:12:08,646
Nothing good.
342
00:12:08,648 --> 00:12:11,115
The italians were originally on
the wrong side of the war.
343
00:12:11,117 --> 00:12:12,383
They were.
344
00:12:12,385 --> 00:12:14,652
Ciao.
345
00:12:14,654 --> 00:12:16,120
[ laughter ]
346
00:12:16,122 --> 00:12:17,855
Gosh.
347
00:12:17,857 --> 00:12:19,123
Italians, right?
348
00:12:19,125 --> 00:12:21,859
♪♪
349
00:12:21,861 --> 00:12:24,395
Alright, so what are you
gonna do for a tantrum?
350
00:12:24,397 --> 00:12:26,864
This time, I'm gonna have
a lot of energy.
351
00:12:26,866 --> 00:12:28,199
You didn't have
a lot of energy last time?
352
00:12:28,201 --> 00:12:30,401
No.
353
00:12:30,403 --> 00:12:31,536
This guy.
That old guy there.
354
00:12:31,538 --> 00:12:33,070
Sal: Avery,
start acting up.
355
00:12:33,072 --> 00:12:35,472
[ laughing hysterically ]
356
00:12:35,474 --> 00:12:37,475
Murr:
Scold her, q!
357
00:12:37,477 --> 00:12:39,944
Avery, stop. Oh, my god.
Avery, calm down.
358
00:12:39,946 --> 00:12:41,879
What are you --
I don't even know what this is.
359
00:12:41,881 --> 00:12:43,214
Oh, my god. These kids.
360
00:12:43,216 --> 00:12:45,750
I don't even know
what to do with them anymore.
361
00:12:45,752 --> 00:12:47,418
Could you back me up
on this one second?
362
00:12:47,420 --> 00:12:49,487
Avery, c'mere, please.
Avery, please come here.
363
00:12:49,489 --> 00:12:50,488
What is your name, sir?
364
00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:51,689
Klaus.
Klaus?
365
00:12:51,691 --> 00:12:54,225
Klaus, this is avery.
Avery, this is klaus.
366
00:12:54,227 --> 00:12:55,560
Now, listen,
367
00:12:55,562 --> 00:12:58,563
If you keep misbehaving,
you see this man right here?
368
00:12:58,565 --> 00:13:00,898
He's a serial killer
of teddy bears.
369
00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:02,700
He -- [ laughs ]
370
00:13:02,702 --> 00:13:05,837
Klaus here is a serial killer
of teddy bears,
371
00:13:05,839 --> 00:13:07,372
And if you don't behave...
372
00:13:07,374 --> 00:13:10,375
He's gonna take teddy
and gut him like a fish
373
00:13:10,377 --> 00:13:12,977
And wear his face
like a mask.
374
00:13:12,979 --> 00:13:14,979
He's gonna take teddy --
[ laughing ]
375
00:13:14,981 --> 00:13:16,447
Avery: What's wrong?
376
00:13:16,449 --> 00:13:18,183
♪♪
377
00:13:21,754 --> 00:13:24,155
If you don't behave,
he's gonna take your teddy
378
00:13:24,157 --> 00:13:25,356
And gut him like a fish
379
00:13:25,358 --> 00:13:27,224
And then wear his face
like a mask.
380
00:13:27,226 --> 00:13:30,094
Right? Tell her. Tell her.
381
00:13:30,096 --> 00:13:31,296
Murr: Q, get him
to back you up.
382
00:13:31,298 --> 00:13:32,563
Klaus, tell you're going
to kill her teddy bear.
383
00:13:32,565 --> 00:13:33,865
Gut him like a fish.
384
00:13:37,637 --> 00:13:39,837
How many teddy bears
did you serial kill?
385
00:13:39,839 --> 00:13:42,039
Oh, I don't know. 100.
386
00:13:42,041 --> 00:13:45,510
Please don't kill
my teddy bear.
387
00:13:45,512 --> 00:13:48,179
Well, if you behave,
then we'll talk about it.
388
00:13:48,181 --> 00:13:50,581
So it's not even a guarantee
if she behaves?
389
00:13:50,583 --> 00:13:51,916
Go over there and be good.
390
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:55,386
Klaus straight up looked
avery in the face and said,
391
00:13:55,388 --> 00:13:57,522
"I will dismember
your teddy bear."
392
00:13:57,524 --> 00:13:59,390
He's done it before.
He'll do it again.
393
00:13:59,392 --> 00:14:00,591
Guess he's not italian.
394
00:14:00,593 --> 00:14:03,460
Klaus.
He's german.
395
00:14:03,462 --> 00:14:04,661
Klaus is german.
396
00:14:04,663 --> 00:14:06,463
On the wrong side
of the war.
Shh!
397
00:14:06,465 --> 00:14:07,398
[ laughing ]
398
00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:08,666
Sal: She said that
on her own!
399
00:14:09,268 --> 00:14:10,334
Daaaad.
400
00:14:10,336 --> 00:14:11,335
Yes, honey?
401
00:14:11,337 --> 00:14:12,403
Murr:
Okay, avery, misbehave.
402
00:14:12,405 --> 00:14:14,071
[ whining ]
I want to go home!
403
00:14:14,073 --> 00:14:15,206
Alright, honey.
404
00:14:15,208 --> 00:14:16,674
Murr: He's watching.
405
00:14:16,676 --> 00:14:18,142
Just give me a half-hour,
please.
406
00:14:18,144 --> 00:14:20,545
You said this
would be 5 minutes!
407
00:14:20,547 --> 00:14:21,879
Did you not
go to school?
408
00:14:21,881 --> 00:14:22,880
Alright, avery, shush.
409
00:14:22,882 --> 00:14:23,881
You said you went
to harvard!
410
00:14:23,883 --> 00:14:25,682
[ laughter ]
411
00:14:25,684 --> 00:14:27,218
These kids.
I'm sorry to laugh.
I didn't mean to laugh.
412
00:14:27,220 --> 00:14:28,152
Stay out of this.
413
00:14:28,154 --> 00:14:30,621
Ohh!
Ohh!
414
00:14:30,623 --> 00:14:32,089
Shush!
415
00:14:32,091 --> 00:14:33,290
[ laughter ]
416
00:14:33,292 --> 00:14:35,026
Don't you dare do that.
That's not nice.
417
00:14:35,028 --> 00:14:36,027
I'm so sorry, sir.
418
00:14:36,029 --> 00:14:37,895
Get him to back you up.
419
00:14:37,897 --> 00:14:39,096
Back me up. Back me up.
420
00:14:39,098 --> 00:14:40,965
If you don't --
if you don't behave...
421
00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:43,968
This man is gonna kill
all of santa's elves.
422
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:46,704
[ laughs ]
423
00:14:46,706 --> 00:14:48,239
This man is gonna kill
santa's elves.
424
00:14:48,241 --> 00:14:50,174
[ gasps ]
yes.
425
00:14:50,176 --> 00:14:51,508
And that, I have
no problem doing.
426
00:14:51,510 --> 00:14:53,578
Aha. You see?
427
00:14:53,580 --> 00:14:55,045
If you're good, you'll get
a lot of gifts this year.
428
00:14:55,047 --> 00:14:56,180
That's right.
429
00:14:56,182 --> 00:14:57,582
And if you're not,
what are you gonna do?
430
00:14:57,584 --> 00:14:58,649
I'm gonna kill the elves.
431
00:14:58,651 --> 00:14:59,984
Even crumpy the elf?
432
00:14:59,986 --> 00:15:01,452
Even clumpy the elf?
433
00:15:01,454 --> 00:15:03,120
Even clumpy the elf.
434
00:15:03,122 --> 00:15:04,255
He's gone.
435
00:15:04,257 --> 00:15:06,791
[ laughter ]
436
00:15:06,793 --> 00:15:08,192
Put your money
where your mouth is.
437
00:15:08,194 --> 00:15:09,994
No, that's not what he's
going to do. I'm sorry.
438
00:15:12,065 --> 00:15:13,564
Can I say something?
439
00:15:15,868 --> 00:15:17,402
[ laughter ]
440
00:15:17,404 --> 00:15:18,669
The elves are done!
441
00:15:18,671 --> 00:15:20,805
♪♪
442
00:15:20,807 --> 00:15:23,207
Narrator: Murr, sal, and q
got some backup,
443
00:15:23,209 --> 00:15:26,611
But murr
is still tonight's big loser.
444
00:15:26,613 --> 00:15:28,412
So, murr lost, and we have
actor, writer,
445
00:15:28,414 --> 00:15:30,881
And my favorite improviser of
all time, bobby moynihan,
446
00:15:30,883 --> 00:15:32,216
Here to help us punish him.
447
00:15:32,218 --> 00:15:34,218
And, murr, today
you are going to be a tailor
448
00:15:34,220 --> 00:15:37,688
Helping women pick out their
wedding dress for their big day.
Ooh.
449
00:15:37,690 --> 00:15:40,625
This place is charming.
It's elegant. It's beautiful.
450
00:15:40,627 --> 00:15:43,760
You will be
none of the above today.
451
00:15:43,762 --> 00:15:45,496
If it seems really tense
in there, don't worry.
452
00:15:45,498 --> 00:15:47,765
I will come in and make it
a lot worse for you.
453
00:15:47,767 --> 00:15:49,634
[ laughter ]
454
00:15:49,636 --> 00:15:53,170
Sal: Murray is the senior tailor
of estelle's dressy dresses,
455
00:15:53,172 --> 00:15:55,572
And bobby
is his esteemed colleague.
456
00:15:55,574 --> 00:15:56,974
Q: Well, bobby's whatever
we need him to be.
457
00:15:56,976 --> 00:15:58,909
Correct.
Okay, so here we go.
458
00:15:58,911 --> 00:16:00,778
Hi. What's your name?
459
00:16:00,780 --> 00:16:02,379
Tara, I'm james.
Nice to meet you.
460
00:16:02,381 --> 00:16:04,581
Have a seat, please.
Make yourself comfortable.
461
00:16:04,583 --> 00:16:05,983
Alright,
so we'll be focusing on tara.
462
00:16:05,985 --> 00:16:07,718
Hi, mom. Hi.
463
00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:09,454
So we'll be focusing
on tara today.
464
00:16:09,456 --> 00:16:10,921
Lace or non-lace?
465
00:16:10,923 --> 00:16:12,990
Not a lot.
Okay.
466
00:16:12,992 --> 00:16:14,992
I'm gonna show you one
with and without.
467
00:16:14,994 --> 00:16:17,995
Okay, tara, I want to show you
this style, too.
468
00:16:17,997 --> 00:16:19,063
I know.
469
00:16:19,065 --> 00:16:20,797
If you're not on
cloud nine after today,
470
00:16:20,799 --> 00:16:22,733
My name isn't
toots murmelstein.
471
00:16:22,735 --> 00:16:25,936
And if you are not on cloud nine
after this dress,
472
00:16:25,938 --> 00:16:27,872
My name is not
toots murmelstein.
473
00:16:27,874 --> 00:16:32,409
Murr, just run to and fro,
clicking your heels.
474
00:16:32,411 --> 00:16:33,978
Okay.
475
00:16:38,485 --> 00:16:40,284
I got to
tell you something.
476
00:16:40,286 --> 00:16:43,888
I [bleep] hate
that heel clicking.
477
00:16:43,890 --> 00:16:46,090
Every day of my life.
478
00:16:46,092 --> 00:16:48,826
I wake up every day and the
first thing I think of is,
479
00:16:48,828 --> 00:16:50,227
If he does that
heel click today,
480
00:16:50,229 --> 00:16:51,428
I'm gonna [bleep]
kill myself.
481
00:16:51,430 --> 00:16:52,697
Oh, no.
482
00:16:52,699 --> 00:16:54,231
Murr, click your heels
on the way back.
483
00:16:54,233 --> 00:16:57,568
Okay, so...
484
00:16:57,570 --> 00:17:01,305
[ laughter ]
485
00:17:01,307 --> 00:17:02,907
One last one.
486
00:17:02,909 --> 00:17:05,776
Suggest taking a few inches in
on the dumper.
487
00:17:05,778 --> 00:17:09,914
But first,
let's measure that dumper, okay?
488
00:17:09,916 --> 00:17:11,315
So how are we today?
Good.
489
00:17:11,317 --> 00:17:12,917
Oh, you can put your stuff down
if you like.
490
00:17:12,919 --> 00:17:15,353
Are we hanging a veil
on that melon of yours?
491
00:17:18,057 --> 00:17:20,391
Bobby looking away.
492
00:17:20,393 --> 00:17:21,726
Uh, question.
493
00:17:21,728 --> 00:17:23,194
When you picture
your wedding
494
00:17:23,196 --> 00:17:25,462
And you walking down the aisle,
495
00:17:25,464 --> 00:17:29,734
Do you imagine a veil
on that melon?
496
00:17:29,736 --> 00:17:30,935
Um, maybe.
497
00:17:30,937 --> 00:17:33,771
[ laughter ]
498
00:17:35,341 --> 00:17:36,607
[ strained ]
excuse me one second.
499
00:17:36,609 --> 00:17:37,842
Yeah, it's good.
500
00:17:40,012 --> 00:17:41,345
Murr,
what are you doing?
501
00:17:41,347 --> 00:17:43,614
It's a punishment!
Get back in there!
502
00:17:43,616 --> 00:17:45,682
Oh, hi, guys.
You're getting married?
503
00:17:45,684 --> 00:17:46,883
Yes, I am.
Okay. Congratulations.
504
00:17:46,885 --> 00:17:48,619
Sal: Hey, bobby.
Can you come on back?
505
00:17:48,621 --> 00:17:51,355
We want to give you a little bit
of a character change.
506
00:17:51,357 --> 00:17:54,024
"so, guys, let's shoot
each other straight."
507
00:17:54,026 --> 00:17:58,162
Guys, let's shoot
each other straight.
508
00:17:58,164 --> 00:18:02,699
Will the wedding
be a purely caucasian affair?
509
00:18:02,701 --> 00:18:03,901
Do you guys know
if the wedding will be
510
00:18:03,903 --> 00:18:06,837
Primarily a caucasian affair?
511
00:18:06,839 --> 00:18:08,639
We're filipino.
You're filipino?
512
00:18:08,641 --> 00:18:11,308
But our mom's side is white and
our dad's side is filipino.
513
00:18:11,310 --> 00:18:12,909
Your mom's side is white.
Yes.
514
00:18:12,911 --> 00:18:14,979
So it's
a half-caucasian affair.
515
00:18:14,981 --> 00:18:16,914
So it's a
cauc and an asian affair.
516
00:18:16,916 --> 00:18:18,649
So -- so it's --
517
00:18:18,651 --> 00:18:22,453
So it's a bit of cauc
and a bit of asian.
518
00:18:22,455 --> 00:18:24,222
So it's a cauc-asian?
It's cauc-asian, right?
519
00:18:26,793 --> 00:18:29,794
How much cauc is coming?
520
00:18:29,796 --> 00:18:31,596
Do you guys --
do you guys know --
521
00:18:31,598 --> 00:18:34,731
[ laughing ]
how much cauc is coming?
522
00:18:34,733 --> 00:18:37,902
♪♪
523
00:18:41,407 --> 00:18:43,474
So it's a cauc-asian wedding?
It's cauc-asian, right?
524
00:18:46,078 --> 00:18:48,813
How much cauc is coming?
525
00:18:48,815 --> 00:18:51,081
Do you guys --
do you guys know --
526
00:18:51,083 --> 00:18:54,018
How much cauc is coming?
527
00:18:54,020 --> 00:18:56,420
[ laughter ]
528
00:18:58,224 --> 00:18:59,690
You okay?
529
00:18:59,692 --> 00:19:02,026
Um.
Keep it together,
you idiot!
530
00:19:02,028 --> 00:19:05,095
Do you guys --
531
00:19:05,097 --> 00:19:08,298
[ laughing ]
532
00:19:08,300 --> 00:19:11,302
[ laughing ]
do you guys know --
533
00:19:11,304 --> 00:19:14,104
Do you guys know
how much cauc is coming?
534
00:19:14,106 --> 00:19:15,506
I'm sorry.
535
00:19:15,508 --> 00:19:18,175
[ laughter ]
536
00:19:18,177 --> 00:19:20,378
How much cauc is coming
to the wedding?
537
00:19:22,649 --> 00:19:23,780
Just the white people?
538
00:19:23,782 --> 00:19:25,115
Yeah, yeah.
539
00:19:25,117 --> 00:19:29,053
I'd say like, 50/50.
Yeah.
540
00:19:29,055 --> 00:19:30,921
Ooh, that's pretty!
541
00:19:30,923 --> 00:19:32,456
Oh, my god. Fantastic.
542
00:19:32,458 --> 00:19:33,858
Look at that.
543
00:19:33,860 --> 00:19:35,592
Again, don't worry about the
length or anything like that.
544
00:19:35,594 --> 00:19:38,863
Murr, just start waving behind
your ass like you farted.
545
00:19:38,865 --> 00:19:40,397
Whew.
546
00:19:40,399 --> 00:19:42,466
[ laughter ]
547
00:19:42,468 --> 00:19:45,669
Toots, toots.
548
00:19:45,671 --> 00:19:47,071
Toot-toot.
549
00:19:52,144 --> 00:19:53,944
Murr, sit down next to
her friends and go,
550
00:19:53,946 --> 00:19:57,481
"man, I wish
I met her 20 years ago."
551
00:19:57,483 --> 00:19:59,416
Whew.
552
00:19:59,418 --> 00:20:00,617
I gotta tell you,
553
00:20:00,619 --> 00:20:03,487
Man, I wish I had met
your friend 20 years ago.
554
00:20:03,489 --> 00:20:05,556
I could be the cauc
in her life.
555
00:20:05,558 --> 00:20:08,825
I could have been the cauc
in her life.
556
00:20:08,827 --> 00:20:10,394
She would have been 3.
557
00:20:15,768 --> 00:20:18,435
Sal: We have a
a new character for bobby.
558
00:20:18,437 --> 00:20:19,770
What is this?
559
00:20:19,772 --> 00:20:21,238
I'm your friend.
560
00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:24,508
Murr, bobby is your unsavory
friend from the neighborhood.
561
00:20:24,510 --> 00:20:26,577
He's gonna be lingering
a little too long.
562
00:20:26,579 --> 00:20:28,779
He really shoots from the hip,
if you know what I mean.
563
00:20:28,781 --> 00:20:31,181
Welcome.
You're getting married?
564
00:20:31,183 --> 00:20:32,449
Yes.
Oh, wow. That's great.
565
00:20:32,451 --> 00:20:36,253
Sal:
And enter bobby.
566
00:20:36,255 --> 00:20:37,988
You like -- hey.
Hey.
567
00:20:37,990 --> 00:20:39,056
You almost done?
568
00:20:39,058 --> 00:20:40,657
What's that?
Are you almost done?
569
00:20:40,659 --> 00:20:42,192
No, no, no. I just started
with the client.
570
00:20:42,194 --> 00:20:43,928
This is my buddy
from back home.
571
00:20:43,930 --> 00:20:44,929
Oh.
Yeah.
572
00:20:44,931 --> 00:20:45,796
He's supposed
to be taking me
573
00:20:45,798 --> 00:20:48,198
To see
the incubus concert.
574
00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:51,535
He's supposed to be taking me
to this incubus concert
575
00:20:51,537 --> 00:20:53,804
That we've been waiting for
for how long?
576
00:20:53,806 --> 00:20:54,939
I'll tell you one thing.
577
00:20:54,941 --> 00:20:56,740
If I miss incubus,
I'm gonna go nuts.
578
00:20:56,742 --> 00:20:59,043
I'm gonna tell everybody
to suck my gabagool.
579
00:21:01,814 --> 00:21:04,481
I think I would probably
prefer a sleeve.
580
00:21:04,483 --> 00:21:06,283
Sleeves.
Okay. Give me one second.
581
00:21:06,285 --> 00:21:07,551
Okay? One second.
582
00:21:07,553 --> 00:21:08,786
Alright.
583
00:21:16,895 --> 00:21:17,962
Bobby:
You getting married?
584
00:21:17,964 --> 00:21:18,963
Yes.
585
00:21:18,965 --> 00:21:20,497
Congratulations.
Thank you.
586
00:21:20,499 --> 00:21:22,299
Guy or girl?
587
00:21:22,301 --> 00:21:24,034
A man,
my boyfriend.
588
00:21:24,036 --> 00:21:25,502
That's cool.
589
00:21:25,504 --> 00:21:27,905
People still
do that now.
590
00:21:30,109 --> 00:21:32,442
Sorry about that, guys.
My apologies.
591
00:21:32,444 --> 00:21:36,046
Okay, so you were saying
sleeve, for sure.
592
00:21:36,048 --> 00:21:37,514
Do you know
the band incubus?
593
00:21:37,516 --> 00:21:38,915
Yeah.
594
00:21:38,917 --> 00:21:40,250
That's all I got to say.
595
00:21:40,252 --> 00:21:43,119
Bobby, it'll be
a little bit, okay?
596
00:21:43,121 --> 00:21:44,321
I know.
I'm sorry, I know.
597
00:21:44,323 --> 00:21:45,922
But I'm just saying,
you told me 3:30.
598
00:21:45,924 --> 00:21:47,658
I don't work here.
I don't care about your job.
599
00:21:47,660 --> 00:21:50,394
I'm not gonna get fired,
so you hurry it up.
600
00:21:50,396 --> 00:21:52,096
I'm the friend
who needs to go see incubus.
601
00:21:57,203 --> 00:21:59,403
Say, "pardon us one second,
sweetheart."
602
00:21:59,405 --> 00:22:01,071
Just give us one second,
sweetheart.
603
00:22:01,073 --> 00:22:03,007
Hey, can I talk to you
for a sec?
604
00:22:03,009 --> 00:22:05,742
Um, if you want
this to stop...
605
00:22:05,744 --> 00:22:06,943
Yes, please!
606
00:22:06,945 --> 00:22:09,013
All you have to do
607
00:22:09,015 --> 00:22:14,151
Is take off the ring
you're wearing and swallow it.
608
00:22:15,688 --> 00:22:18,089
[ laughter ]
609
00:22:20,626 --> 00:22:21,725
Your wedding band!
610
00:22:24,096 --> 00:22:26,630
You're not serious.
Is this dangerous?
611
00:22:26,632 --> 00:22:27,964
Or we can keep going.
612
00:22:27,966 --> 00:22:29,900
I mean, we could keep
going until you do.
613
00:22:29,902 --> 00:22:31,368
No, because I have
a plane to catch.
614
00:22:31,370 --> 00:22:32,636
Ohh.
Oh, do you?
615
00:22:32,638 --> 00:22:34,304
Uh...
616
00:22:34,306 --> 00:22:35,906
Okay, [bleep].
Let's do it.
617
00:22:35,908 --> 00:22:37,507
Ohhh!
Let's do it.
618
00:22:37,509 --> 00:22:39,643
Sal: Oh, my god.
Oh, my god!
619
00:22:39,645 --> 00:22:41,712
End this punishment, please.
Let's do it.
620
00:22:41,714 --> 00:22:44,648
Wow. I actually --
I can't believe this.
621
00:22:44,650 --> 00:22:47,184
Here we go.
Oh, my god.
622
00:22:47,186 --> 00:22:49,386
There we go.
He's got the water.
623
00:22:49,388 --> 00:22:52,989
Oh. Oh, my god.
624
00:22:52,991 --> 00:22:54,591
Oh, my god.
625
00:22:54,593 --> 00:22:58,862
Down the hatch, baby!
Come on, toots.
626
00:22:58,864 --> 00:23:00,797
Oh, my god.
627
00:23:00,799 --> 00:23:02,532
♪♪
628
00:23:02,534 --> 00:23:04,134
Oh, my --
629
00:23:04,136 --> 00:23:06,737
♪♪
630
00:23:06,739 --> 00:23:08,272
[ gags, coughs ]
whoa!
631
00:23:08,274 --> 00:23:10,540
Oh, my god.
632
00:23:10,542 --> 00:23:11,742
Punishment's over.
633
00:23:11,744 --> 00:23:15,412
Well...
Well...
634
00:23:15,414 --> 00:23:17,481
There was one more
quick thing.
635
00:23:17,483 --> 00:23:19,149
You know you're getting
on a flight right now.
636
00:23:19,151 --> 00:23:21,551
Yeah.
637
00:23:21,553 --> 00:23:23,820
We know that you don't
like this outfit.
638
00:23:23,822 --> 00:23:25,689
Uh-huh.
639
00:23:25,691 --> 00:23:28,092
So we have a different outfit
for you to wear to the airport
640
00:23:28,094 --> 00:23:30,160
And get on the plane.
641
00:23:30,162 --> 00:23:32,362
[ laughter ]
642
00:23:32,364 --> 00:23:38,969
♪♪
643
00:23:38,971 --> 00:23:45,576
♪♪
644
00:23:45,578 --> 00:23:52,116
♪♪
645
00:23:52,118 --> 00:24:00,056
♪♪
646
00:24:00,058 --> 00:24:01,525
Thank you. I try.
647
00:24:01,527 --> 00:24:03,961
♪♪