1
00:00:06,941 --> 00:00:10,609
[ laughter ]
2
00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:13,145
Aah!
3
00:00:13,147 --> 00:00:14,346
Let's just get this started.
4
00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,214
Are you [bleep] kidding me?
5
00:00:16,216 --> 00:00:17,749
Who's a good guy?!
6
00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:20,285
[ laughter ]
7
00:00:20,287 --> 00:00:21,553
[ cymbals crash ]
8
00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:25,557
[ laughter ]
9
00:00:25,559 --> 00:00:28,026
With special guest,
post malone.
10
00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:30,362
Me? I don't think
he should have done that.
11
00:00:32,833 --> 00:00:34,899
Today, we're at
the american dream mall
12
00:00:34,901 --> 00:00:37,702
Asking shoppers to mind
their manners.
13
00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:39,304
We'll be giving
etiquette advice to people
14
00:00:39,306 --> 00:00:40,705
That didn't even ask for it.
15
00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:44,376
If you can't deliver your advice
to people, you lose.
16
00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:47,179
Are you guys kidding me?
We just talked about etiquette.
17
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:48,247
We talked about
their etiquette.
18
00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:53,718
Guys, this is a
hard challenge, right?
19
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:54,919
Yeah, it's gonna be.
20
00:00:54,921 --> 00:00:57,522
Sounds like a job for...
Hard jimmy.
21
00:00:57,524 --> 00:00:59,391
Sal and q: Oh!
22
00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:01,460
The return of --
that's where you've been.
23
00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:03,528
Sal: Murr, you're looking
dangerously close
24
00:01:03,530 --> 00:01:04,997
To a person I'd
hang out with.
25
00:01:04,999 --> 00:01:06,598
[ all laugh ]
26
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:07,866
Watch yourself.
27
00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:10,669
Get back in those
cotton dockers with pleats.
28
00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,671
Oh, see this kid over there
that's swirling the chair?
29
00:01:12,673 --> 00:01:13,806
Yeah.
30
00:01:13,808 --> 00:01:15,073
Just get his mom,
please.
31
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:16,675
Oh, god.
32
00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:17,742
Hi.
33
00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,944
"control him, please."
34
00:01:19,946 --> 00:01:22,147
Do me -- can you
do me a favor?
35
00:01:22,149 --> 00:01:23,148
He's never gonna do it.
36
00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:25,684
Q: Yeah, he's insane
if he does it.
37
00:01:25,686 --> 00:01:28,620
Do me a favor.
Control him, please.
Woman: Okay.
38
00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:30,689
Right?
[ sal and q laugh ]
39
00:01:30,691 --> 00:01:32,491
He's just a little
out of control
40
00:01:32,493 --> 00:01:34,759
With the swinging
around the chair.
41
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:37,295
Keep him under control.
Q: Oh!
42
00:01:37,297 --> 00:01:39,431
Hey, buddy.
43
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:41,500
[ sal and q laughing ]
hard jimmy.
44
00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:42,668
Hard jimmy.
45
00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:47,639
Q: Alright, murr, the guy
in the blue shirt there,
46
00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:48,773
Just go up to him
and be like, "hey,
47
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,775
Come on, come on,
get off the phone."
48
00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:53,311
Hey, hey, come on.
Get off the phone.
49
00:01:53,313 --> 00:01:55,780
-Yeah, right.
-No, seriously.
50
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,049
Get off the phone?
Murr: Get off the phone.
51
00:01:57,051 --> 00:01:58,583
"etiquette, bro. Etiquette."
52
00:01:58,585 --> 00:02:00,052
-Why are you asking me that?
-You know, it's good etiquette.
53
00:02:00,054 --> 00:02:01,453
Why don't you
do me a favor?
54
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:02,521
Yeah.
55
00:02:02,523 --> 00:02:03,856
Why don't you go
[bleep] yourself?
56
00:02:03,858 --> 00:02:04,989
How's that sound?
57
00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:07,392
Yes!
Hard jimmy out.
58
00:02:07,394 --> 00:02:09,127
What are you, [bleep] nuts?
Are you a psychopath?
59
00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:10,929
You know what it is?
I'm talking
to my little girl.
60
00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:12,464
Are you crazy?
Oh, that's great.
You have a little girl?
61
00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:13,932
That's excellent.
Why don't you mind
your business?
62
00:02:13,934 --> 00:02:16,000
That's great.
You're gonna get
your ass kicked one day.
63
00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:18,002
I'm warning you.
Just curse less.
64
00:02:18,004 --> 00:02:19,471
Especially with a kid
on the phone.
65
00:02:19,473 --> 00:02:21,806
Q: Oh, my god!
66
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:22,807
Hard jimmy.
67
00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:24,609
Whoo, man, hard jimmy.
68
00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:26,811
Damn, hard jimmy.
69
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:27,746
Murr, murr, murr.
70
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,281
He is heated.
71
00:02:29,283 --> 00:02:31,149
He's saying
you're crazy, cuckoo.
72
00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:32,951
Ooh!
73
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:34,887
Guys, should I go
calm him down?
74
00:02:34,889 --> 00:02:37,222
Oh, god. Oh, god.
75
00:02:37,224 --> 00:02:39,023
Dude...
76
00:02:39,025 --> 00:02:40,759
Holy shit, it is you!
77
00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:43,361
It is you!
78
00:02:43,363 --> 00:02:44,829
He didn't even
recognize him!
79
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:46,831
Hard jimmy! Hard jimmy!
He didn't recognize him
80
00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:48,032
Because he was hard jimmy.
81
00:02:48,034 --> 00:02:49,368
I was like,
"what is this guy telling me?
82
00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:50,369
I'm talking
to my daughter."
83
00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:52,504
I can't believe
it's you, man.
84
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:57,309
So funny that the hat was
like clark kent's glasses.
85
00:02:57,311 --> 00:02:59,177
Hard jimmy.
86
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:02,714
Q: Oh, man.
Hard jimmy survived.
87
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:04,516
Murr: Alright, q, it's
a lovely day in the mall,
88
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:07,652
And it's your job to
teach people some manners today.
89
00:03:07,654 --> 00:03:09,321
If there's one thing I think of
when I think of q,
90
00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:12,056
I think of
proper etiquette.
91
00:03:12,058 --> 00:03:14,058
Q, you see the woman
in yoga pants?
92
00:03:14,060 --> 00:03:15,059
Yeah, I see her.
93
00:03:15,061 --> 00:03:18,062
-Sit next to her real quick.
-No.
94
00:03:18,064 --> 00:03:19,464
Come on, man.
95
00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:21,633
"excuse me.
I hate to bother you."
96
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:26,805
Excuse me.
I hate to bother you.
97
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:28,407
I don't normally do this,
but...
98
00:03:28,409 --> 00:03:30,142
"keep yoga pants at the gym."
99
00:03:30,144 --> 00:03:31,876
[ sal laughs ]
100
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:34,078
Uh, you know?
Oh, my lordy, lordy.
101
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,614
[ sighs ]
q, do it.
102
00:03:35,616 --> 00:03:37,149
You know, the thing
about the yoga pants,
103
00:03:37,151 --> 00:03:38,883
They're good for the gym.
104
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:41,553
Oh!
Not -- not the mall.
105
00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:45,090
[ sal and murr laughing ]
106
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,893
Sit there.
You don't move.
107
00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:50,162
You don't move.
108
00:03:50,164 --> 00:03:51,964
You sit there
and look at her.
109
00:03:54,501 --> 00:03:57,169
Sal and murr: Oh!
110
00:03:57,171 --> 00:03:59,972
No way, dude.
111
00:03:59,974 --> 00:04:01,840
Q, the guy
with the blue hat.
112
00:04:01,842 --> 00:04:03,375
Strike up a conversation
with him.
113
00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:05,577
Excuse me, do you know if there
was a walgreens down that way?
114
00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:06,911
Did you see one?
Oh, yeah.
115
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,647
The walgreens.
It's definitely in here, though.
116
00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:12,116
Q, "do not interrupt me,"
and clap your hands.
117
00:04:12,118 --> 00:04:14,853
The only thing is I need
to go get suppositories.
118
00:04:14,855 --> 00:04:16,789
I got to go get those, and I
think they sell them over there.
119
00:04:16,791 --> 00:04:17,790
It's at the end
of the hall.
120
00:04:17,792 --> 00:04:20,725
Do not interrupt me.
121
00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:21,860
I need suppositories.
122
00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:25,730
[ sal and murr laughing ]
123
00:04:25,732 --> 00:04:27,065
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
124
00:04:27,067 --> 00:04:28,266
Alright.
Have a good day. Thank you.
125
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,734
I don't know
how that looked graceful,
126
00:04:29,736 --> 00:04:31,804
But the guy
didn't get mad.
127
00:04:31,806 --> 00:04:33,137
I'm done.
128
00:04:33,139 --> 00:04:34,606
[ laughter ]
129
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:37,009
-Alright, sal.
-Alright, sal.
130
00:04:37,011 --> 00:04:38,610
Murr: Sal, you see the guy
laying there on the couch?
131
00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:40,278
Go up to him real quick.
132
00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:41,946
Excuse me.
133
00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,615
"pull your shirt down."
134
00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:44,616
Uh...
135
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,685
[ murr and q laughing ]
136
00:04:46,687 --> 00:04:48,420
Pull your shirt down.
137
00:04:48,422 --> 00:04:51,156
Q: Oh!
138
00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:53,958
How did he turn that into
a community-building...
139
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,560
He did.
...Exercise?
140
00:04:55,562 --> 00:04:57,029
It's easy.
I'm soft sal.
141
00:04:57,031 --> 00:04:59,297
Oh!
Soft sal.
142
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:00,965
Soft sal, everyone.
143
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:02,967
Sal, stop this guy
in the black shirt.
144
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:04,169
Excuse me.
145
00:05:04,171 --> 00:05:06,104
"it's rude to stare, sir."
146
00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:07,940
It is rude
to stare, sir.
147
00:05:09,576 --> 00:05:12,244
[ murr laughing ]
148
00:05:12,246 --> 00:05:15,180
Q:
Oh, my god, dude.
149
00:05:15,182 --> 00:05:16,381
He's still staring
at you.
150
00:05:16,383 --> 00:05:17,449
Murr: "rude!"
151
00:05:17,451 --> 00:05:19,051
It's rude. It's rude.
152
00:05:19,053 --> 00:05:20,118
It's rude.
153
00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:22,721
Oh!
[ q and murr laughing ]
154
00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,523
Oh, he's still looking.
155
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:27,059
Sal's hiding
behind a chair.
156
00:05:27,061 --> 00:05:28,661
Dude, he's still
looking at you.
He's still looking.
157
00:05:28,663 --> 00:05:30,195
No, he's not.
Sal, go up to him.
158
00:05:30,197 --> 00:05:33,465
"putting on sunglasses will not
hide your staring, sir."
159
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:35,400
Soft sal, man.
160
00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:37,202
Murr: Okay, here we go.
Here we go.
161
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:38,336
Excuse me.
162
00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:40,039
[ laughter ]
163
00:05:42,442 --> 00:05:44,709
Q: Dude, he's still
looking at you.
Murr: He's still looking.
164
00:05:44,711 --> 00:05:46,111
-No, he's not.
-Sal, go up to him.
165
00:05:46,113 --> 00:05:47,179
"putting on sunglasses
166
00:05:47,181 --> 00:05:49,247
Will not hide
your staring, sir."
167
00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:51,383
Okay, here we go.
Here we go.
168
00:05:51,385 --> 00:05:53,852
Sir, putting on the sunglasses
will not hide the staring.
169
00:05:55,589 --> 00:05:58,123
[ laughter ]
170
00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:01,260
Soft sal.
[bleep] soft sal.
171
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:04,529
Staring. You're staring.
172
00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:07,800
[ laughter ]
173
00:06:07,802 --> 00:06:10,469
Murr, q, and sal
shared sound advice,
174
00:06:10,471 --> 00:06:13,538
Keeping them safe
from the loser board.
175
00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:14,939
And we're live.
176
00:06:14,941 --> 00:06:17,075
Today, we're playing producers,
and we've hired someone
177
00:06:17,077 --> 00:06:19,077
To do a live product review.
178
00:06:19,079 --> 00:06:21,279
Precisely one minute
before we go live,
179
00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:24,483
We'll have to give the on-camera
talent a bunch of odd details
180
00:06:24,485 --> 00:06:26,551
That they'll need to remember
during the taping.
181
00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,020
The goal is to get them
182
00:06:28,022 --> 00:06:30,355
To remember
as many specifics as possible.
183
00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:31,623
Whoever's spokesperson
remembers
184
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,958
The least amount
of details loses.
185
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:35,527
And we're out.
186
00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:40,899
Q and sal: Here we go.
187
00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,167
Murr: Hi, julie.
How are you?
188
00:06:42,169 --> 00:06:44,769
I'm james. Nice to meet you.
Thanks for your help today.
189
00:06:44,771 --> 00:06:45,904
So, this person thinks
they're coming in
190
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,439
To give a product review.
191
00:06:47,441 --> 00:06:49,241
But little do they know,
murray's going to make them
192
00:06:49,243 --> 00:06:51,976
Try to remember all these
ridiculous details to it.
193
00:06:51,978 --> 00:06:53,445
So, julie,
this is the product.
194
00:06:53,447 --> 00:06:55,514
It's called
a four-in-one pen tool.
195
00:06:55,516 --> 00:06:56,715
We'll have you explore
the product
196
00:06:56,717 --> 00:06:58,650
When the commercial starts.
During the commercial,
197
00:06:58,652 --> 00:07:00,585
There's some details
I want you to remember.
198
00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:01,720
-Two minutes.
-Two minutes? Okay.
199
00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:03,856
So, julie, a couple of things.
-Here we go.
200
00:07:03,858 --> 00:07:05,724
The slogan
for the product is,
201
00:07:05,726 --> 00:07:07,392
"damn, gina."
202
00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:09,127
[ laughter ]
203
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:10,863
At some point,
if I point to you,
204
00:07:10,865 --> 00:07:12,197
I want you stand
at attention.
205
00:07:12,199 --> 00:07:14,399
We pipe in "the star-spangled
banner" at the start of --
206
00:07:14,401 --> 00:07:16,535
With the flag
superimposed, okay?
207
00:07:16,537 --> 00:07:18,603
Stand at attention.
It's a star-spangled banner.
208
00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:19,938
Do I really...?
209
00:07:19,940 --> 00:07:22,006
You don't have to salute.
Q: Yeah, she can salute.
210
00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:24,276
No, I mean, yeah,
salute, salute, for sure.
211
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:25,277
[ laughs ]
212
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:27,412
In a pinch, this could
function as a tampon.
213
00:07:27,414 --> 00:07:30,482
If you needed it to,
it could function as a tampon.
214
00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:32,350
It's got an absorbent tip.
Remember that.
215
00:07:32,352 --> 00:07:34,687
She's overwhelmed.
She's like -- [ exhales ]
216
00:07:34,689 --> 00:07:35,888
When you order
the product --
217
00:07:35,890 --> 00:07:37,155
This is so much.
If I actually had this before --
218
00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:38,090
Focus with me, okay?
Okay.
219
00:07:38,092 --> 00:07:39,491
One minute.
Okay, one second.
220
00:07:39,493 --> 00:07:42,160
If the world were to end,
you could use this to get laid.
221
00:07:42,162 --> 00:07:44,629
It will get you laid.
It will get you laid.
Alright.
222
00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,030
Alright,
going live in 10...
223
00:07:46,032 --> 00:07:50,168
Remember, it'll get you laid,
tampon, "damn, gina,"
224
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:52,371
"star-spangled banner."
okay, ready, julie?
225
00:07:52,373 --> 00:07:54,707
Three, two, and julie,
you are...
226
00:07:56,643 --> 00:08:00,245
I am looking at this
amazing product right here.
227
00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:02,847
I'm super excited.
228
00:08:02,849 --> 00:08:05,250
"damn, gina."
229
00:08:05,252 --> 00:08:06,518
Q: We got one.
230
00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:09,722
This is a pen --
four in one.
231
00:08:09,724 --> 00:08:11,256
And is this a screwdriver?
232
00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:12,991
There's a screwdriver?
233
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:15,193
She saluted.
234
00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:16,595
She saluted.
In the middle of nothing.
235
00:08:16,597 --> 00:08:18,463
"is this a screwdriver?"
236
00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:21,800
[ both laughing ]
237
00:08:21,802 --> 00:08:23,602
Oh, my gosh.
238
00:08:23,604 --> 00:08:26,939
You know what, ladies?
You could use this as a tampon.
239
00:08:26,941 --> 00:08:29,808
Oh!
240
00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:32,010
I'm just -- there are so many
amazing things about this.
241
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:33,345
Murr, you're running
out of time, buddy.
242
00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:35,213
She still needs
to say "get laid."
243
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:37,682
There's so many things just keep
coming to my mind
244
00:08:37,684 --> 00:08:41,286
Between the tampon and being
able to write and measure.
245
00:08:41,288 --> 00:08:42,621
No, no.
246
00:08:42,623 --> 00:08:46,024
Honestly, if I saw a guy
who had this, he might get laid.
247
00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:47,359
[ ding! ]
248
00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:49,093
[ buzzer ]
249
00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:50,495
And that's a cut.
250
00:08:50,497 --> 00:08:52,097
Yes! You did so good.
251
00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:53,698
Wow!
252
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,168
How were the sales?
We sold 800 pens.
253
00:08:56,170 --> 00:08:57,436
Wow!
254
00:08:57,438 --> 00:09:00,973
The most requested reason
for buying was for the tampon.
255
00:09:00,975 --> 00:09:02,841
The tampon.
Oh, my god.
256
00:09:02,843 --> 00:09:04,977
[ laughter ]
257
00:09:04,979 --> 00:09:06,645
-Hi. What was your name again?
-Lorena.
258
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:07,646
Lorena. Okay.
259
00:09:07,648 --> 00:09:08,981
-Alright.
-Here we go.
260
00:09:08,983 --> 00:09:10,783
We're going for, like,
an unboxing-type feel.
261
00:09:10,785 --> 00:09:11,984
It's gonna be live.
262
00:09:11,986 --> 00:09:14,719
There are a couple of things
that we need you to hit.
263
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:15,988
What are those things?
264
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:19,992
You have to say really fast,
"has caused cancer in lab rats."
265
00:09:19,994 --> 00:09:21,193
[ laughter ]
266
00:09:21,195 --> 00:09:23,928
This item has caused cancer
in lab rats.
267
00:09:23,930 --> 00:09:25,530
Perfect.
Okay. This is great.
268
00:09:25,532 --> 00:09:29,134
Our company is dedicated
to destroying female illiteracy.
269
00:09:29,136 --> 00:09:30,669
"we go, girl!"
270
00:09:30,671 --> 00:09:32,471
[ laughter ]
271
00:09:32,473 --> 00:09:34,339
-Okay. We'll just run them --
-one minute.
272
00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:38,410
So simple,
even mom could use it.
273
00:09:38,412 --> 00:09:42,080
Only two more --
certified eagle-friendly.
274
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,548
Certified eagle-friendly?
275
00:09:43,550 --> 00:09:45,617
By the american federation
of bald eagles.
276
00:09:45,619 --> 00:09:47,019
Alright,
so they weighed in on this one.
277
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:49,087
There's no way.
She's getting two.
278
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,223
And then an official
brand sponsor
279
00:09:51,225 --> 00:09:52,624
Of the gathering
of the juggalos.
280
00:09:52,626 --> 00:09:55,160
That is interesting.
Do you know what juggalos are?
281
00:09:55,162 --> 00:09:56,428
They're the clowns.
282
00:09:56,430 --> 00:09:57,629
-Oh, no, I don't.
-Okay.
283
00:09:57,631 --> 00:10:00,165
Here we go.
We are live in five...
284
00:10:00,167 --> 00:10:01,500
Here we go!
Go, q, go!
285
00:10:01,502 --> 00:10:03,902
Together: 3, 2, 1!
Juggalos,
juggalos, juggalos.
286
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:05,904
Action!
287
00:10:05,906 --> 00:10:08,907
Hello. So, this pen is --
288
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:10,442
It has caused cancer
in lab rats,
289
00:10:10,444 --> 00:10:13,712
But we don't want
to talk about that.
290
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:16,915
It's so simple and it's so easy
to use that even mom can use it.
291
00:10:16,917 --> 00:10:18,851
Murr: Mom can use it.
She got another one.
292
00:10:18,853 --> 00:10:22,521
It has actually helped
with female illiteracy.
293
00:10:22,523 --> 00:10:24,189
We go, girl!
294
00:10:24,191 --> 00:10:25,590
Yes!
295
00:10:25,592 --> 00:10:26,791
She's nailing it.
296
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,193
30 seconds left.
297
00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:29,728
Oh, and the clowns,
the clowns.
298
00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,864
This could potentially
help the clowns.
299
00:10:31,866 --> 00:10:33,666
[ laughter ]
300
00:10:33,668 --> 00:10:35,034
That doesn't count.
301
00:10:38,338 --> 00:10:40,539
-[ whispering ] eagle.
-Eagle.
302
00:10:40,541 --> 00:10:44,142
This actually has
helped eagles and jiggalos.
303
00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:46,411
[ laughs ]
304
00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:48,413
This is a full
crash and burn.
305
00:10:48,415 --> 00:10:49,481
You suck, q.
306
00:10:49,483 --> 00:10:51,149
Yeah, this is --
this is a perfect pen.
307
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:53,685
You need to buy this.
308
00:10:53,687 --> 00:10:55,554
We go, girls!
309
00:10:55,556 --> 00:10:56,955
Dan: That's a cut.
310
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:59,091
That was disastrous, q.
311
00:10:59,093 --> 00:11:01,025
Dan, is there
any feedback from the...
312
00:11:01,027 --> 00:11:03,495
"oh, man, the lens cap
was on the whole time."
313
00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:06,565
Oh, was the lens cap
on the whole time?
314
00:11:06,567 --> 00:11:08,366
Oh, great.
315
00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:10,168
[ laughter ]
316
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,770
Murr:
Here we go, sal.
317
00:11:11,772 --> 00:11:14,907
Man: Yeah, it's a couple
of minutes out, still,
but we're getting close.
318
00:11:14,909 --> 00:11:16,241
Dan, "four minutes!"
319
00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:17,309
Four minutes!
320
00:11:17,311 --> 00:11:18,843
Sal: Oh, god, dan.
321
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:21,646
[ laughing ]
322
00:11:21,648 --> 00:11:23,381
This is where
you'll be standing.
323
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:25,918
There's a couple of other things
that the manufacturer
324
00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:28,387
Wants us to mention
during the live segment.
325
00:11:28,389 --> 00:11:30,589
Now turn
the page over, sal.
326
00:11:30,591 --> 00:11:32,791
So, we want you to say
"it makes a great gift
327
00:11:32,793 --> 00:11:36,795
For, like,
emotionally distant fathers."
328
00:11:36,797 --> 00:11:39,397
"now free of any
gang colors and insignias."
329
00:11:39,399 --> 00:11:40,465
That's important.
330
00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:42,134
Q:
"it was a bloodbath."
331
00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:43,802
It was a bloodbath
when they had that.
332
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:46,004
[ laughter ]
333
00:11:46,006 --> 00:11:49,207
"the product is not intended
to aid with conception."
334
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:50,208
So...
335
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:52,877
What?
336
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:54,479
And then
the last thing here,
337
00:11:54,481 --> 00:11:57,616
Just say, "deadass, this pen
will change you, deadass." so --
338
00:11:57,618 --> 00:12:00,419
Wait. I have to say
all these things?
339
00:12:00,421 --> 00:12:01,753
Okay, ready?
340
00:12:01,755 --> 00:12:05,424
Q and murr: Five, four,
three, two, one.
341
00:12:05,426 --> 00:12:06,759
Dan:
And you're live!
342
00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:11,330
Fola: Wait. I have to say
all these things?
Sal: Okay, ready?
343
00:12:11,332 --> 00:12:15,300
Q and murr: Five, four,
three, two, one.
344
00:12:17,471 --> 00:12:21,206
Hi. My name is fola,
and I am from maya sol reviews.
345
00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:24,810
Today, I have an amazing
four-in-one pen tool.
346
00:12:24,812 --> 00:12:31,683
It is the best gift that you can
give dad on father's day.
347
00:12:31,685 --> 00:12:34,285
For emotionally detached
fathers.
348
00:12:34,287 --> 00:12:36,021
Murr: Oh!
Q: Whoa!
349
00:12:36,023 --> 00:12:39,558
Oh, it's also free
of any, um,
350
00:12:39,560 --> 00:12:41,426
Gang affiliations
or insignias.
351
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:43,628
Wow!
She got another one.
352
00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:48,634
And listen,
this pen is not for...
353
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,770
[ laughs ]
it's not for conception.
354
00:12:51,772 --> 00:12:53,772
[ laughter ]
355
00:12:53,774 --> 00:12:54,940
She got it.
356
00:12:56,910 --> 00:13:00,379
This pen will deadass
change your life.
357
00:13:00,381 --> 00:13:02,247
Q and murr: Wow!
[ buzzer ]
358
00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:03,715
Hey!
359
00:13:03,717 --> 00:13:04,916
What?!
360
00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:07,586
It's okay.
You got it. Deadass.
361
00:13:07,588 --> 00:13:10,321
Murr: Got them all.
362
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:12,323
Q couldn't produce a win.
363
00:13:12,325 --> 00:13:15,594
So he's tonight's big loser.
364
00:13:15,596 --> 00:13:17,596
Alright,
first things first.
365
00:13:17,598 --> 00:13:20,265
On tonight's show, we have
rapper, singer, songwriter,
366
00:13:20,267 --> 00:13:22,333
And the best dude on the planet,
post malone.
367
00:13:22,335 --> 00:13:23,668
And we're punishing him!
368
00:13:23,670 --> 00:13:25,537
No. Second thing
is you lost.
369
00:13:25,539 --> 00:13:27,072
Oh, come on, man.
370
00:13:27,074 --> 00:13:29,741
Q, today, you're gonna be
a parking-garage attendant
371
00:13:29,743 --> 00:13:31,476
Returning cars to their owners.
372
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:32,611
And don't worry, buddy.
373
00:13:32,613 --> 00:13:35,214
I mean, nothing happened
to any of their cars.
374
00:13:35,216 --> 00:13:38,750
But if it did, you're
the one held responsible.
375
00:13:38,752 --> 00:13:40,151
You can't mess with...
376
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:41,286
I mean,
we're in the garage.
377
00:13:41,288 --> 00:13:43,022
There's $100,000 cars
right behind us.
378
00:13:43,024 --> 00:13:44,956
We're not messing
with people's cars.
379
00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:47,292
No, we're not.
We're not. You are.
380
00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,360
Alright, q.
381
00:13:49,362 --> 00:13:51,430
Today, we're at little man
parking for your punishment.
382
00:13:51,432 --> 00:13:53,232
How you feeling, buddy?
383
00:13:53,234 --> 00:13:54,900
No. I don't feel good.
384
00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,367
[ laughter ]
385
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:58,904
Sal: Post is gonna be
on staff with you.
386
00:13:58,906 --> 00:14:01,973
But he's gonna be helping us
to basically stoke the flames.
387
00:14:01,975 --> 00:14:03,775
Here we go.
Here we go.
388
00:14:03,777 --> 00:14:05,510
Q: Hello.
389
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:06,845
Good, good.
390
00:14:06,847 --> 00:14:08,780
Sal: Alright, these people
are picking up their car,
391
00:14:08,782 --> 00:14:11,516
And that means that
it's showtime for posty.
392
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:12,784
No, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
393
00:14:12,786 --> 00:14:15,721
Post, go take
your position, buddy.
394
00:14:15,723 --> 00:14:17,656
Oh, my god.
What's about to happen?
395
00:14:17,658 --> 00:14:20,125
The car has been secretly
brought up to our floor.
396
00:14:20,127 --> 00:14:21,860
We're gonna
have our way with it
397
00:14:21,862 --> 00:14:23,528
And send it back down
with post.
398
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,097
Get ready for this, q.
399
00:14:28,001 --> 00:14:29,468
Alright, q.
400
00:14:29,470 --> 00:14:31,670
Here comes the car.
401
00:14:31,672 --> 00:14:34,005
Okay.
This is probably you.
402
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:35,807
[laughing]
look at the car.
403
00:14:35,809 --> 00:14:37,342
The car is hot-boxed.
404
00:14:37,344 --> 00:14:39,478
Post, just come out of the car,
be coughing a little bit
405
00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:41,146
And be like,
"I would give it 5 to 10
406
00:14:41,148 --> 00:14:43,014
If you don't want
the contact high."
407
00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:44,116
Alright.
408
00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:50,221
Boss, thanks for letting me
smoke that up in there, man.
409
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:53,825
About 5 to 10 if you guys
don't want the contact...
410
00:14:53,827 --> 00:14:56,295
Contact high.
411
00:14:56,297 --> 00:14:57,663
Not...
412
00:15:01,502 --> 00:15:04,035
Sal: Alright, q,
let's see you explain this.
413
00:15:04,037 --> 00:15:05,704
That was my call,
because the cops
414
00:15:05,706 --> 00:15:07,106
Are still busting chops
about all that stuff.
415
00:15:07,108 --> 00:15:08,573
Oh, but I'm allergic
to this.
416
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,309
Oh, really? Oh.
Yeah.
417
00:15:10,311 --> 00:15:12,443
Uh...
[ laughter ]
418
00:15:12,445 --> 00:15:13,779
What are you allergic to?
419
00:15:13,781 --> 00:15:15,114
The tobacco.
420
00:15:15,116 --> 00:15:17,583
Oh, don't worry about that.
It's not tobacco.
421
00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:22,253
-Oh, I'm the manager.
-You're the manager?
422
00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:24,323
-I am the manager, yeah.
-I want corporate's number.
423
00:15:24,325 --> 00:15:25,524
Murr: Uh-oh, uh-oh.
424
00:15:25,526 --> 00:15:28,994
Post, come out
and bring q febreze.
425
00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:30,529
Thank you. Okay.
I'm so sorry.
426
00:15:30,531 --> 00:15:31,930
I'll blast this out
with febreze.
427
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:33,465
No. I want
corporate's number.
428
00:15:33,467 --> 00:15:35,400
But febreze neutralizes
on contact.
429
00:15:35,402 --> 00:15:37,402
Febreze neutralizes
on contact.
430
00:15:37,404 --> 00:15:38,870
Oh, yeah, that's right
in your face.
431
00:15:38,872 --> 00:15:40,806
I could see how
you'd be upset by that.
432
00:15:40,808 --> 00:15:42,341
Post, go back and sit
in the car and be like,
433
00:15:42,343 --> 00:15:44,943
"I just want to get
the last little bit
of it that's in here."
434
00:15:44,945 --> 00:15:47,579
Do you mind if I get the last
little bit that's left in there?
435
00:15:50,417 --> 00:15:52,417
Alright, he'll go in there
and suck out the rest.
436
00:15:52,419 --> 00:15:54,085
[ inhales sharply ]
437
00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:55,621
Sal: Q, they absolutely
hate you.
438
00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:03,094
You should get out of the car.
You should get out of the car.
439
00:16:03,096 --> 00:16:04,229
[ laughter ]
440
00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:05,898
Alright,
thank you so much.
441
00:16:09,703 --> 00:16:11,703
This is crazy.
442
00:16:11,705 --> 00:16:13,438
Sal:
Alright, here we go.
443
00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:15,374
Q: You guys are
picking up a car?
444
00:16:15,376 --> 00:16:16,842
Woman: The white
jeep grand cherokee.
445
00:16:16,844 --> 00:16:18,043
White jeep grand cherokee.
446
00:16:18,045 --> 00:16:19,110
"oh, the white jeep?"
447
00:16:19,112 --> 00:16:21,646
Oh. Oh, the white jeep.
448
00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:23,682
Alright,
q, here comes the car.
449
00:16:24,918 --> 00:16:26,051
Uh...
450
00:16:26,053 --> 00:16:27,118
[ groans ]
451
00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:28,854
Post:
"a thing kind of happened."
452
00:16:28,856 --> 00:16:30,321
[ chuckles nervously ]
453
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:31,923
-Are you okay?
-A thing kind of happened.
454
00:16:31,925 --> 00:16:34,593
"I got to show you something
out of the trunk."
455
00:16:34,595 --> 00:16:36,595
I mean, it's --
here, I'll show you.
456
00:16:36,597 --> 00:16:38,597
"I'm just gonna take
this one out of here."
457
00:16:38,599 --> 00:16:41,266
I'm just gonna take this one
out of here. Alright.
458
00:16:42,736 --> 00:16:43,869
Oh, my god.
459
00:16:43,871 --> 00:16:45,971
-Oh!
-This is crazy.
460
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,575
Post: "I got to show you
something out of the trunk."
461
00:16:50,577 --> 00:16:52,977
I'm just gonna take this one
out of here. Alright.
462
00:16:52,979 --> 00:16:55,380
Oh, my god.
463
00:16:55,382 --> 00:16:57,115
[ murr laughing ]
464
00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:58,583
What is that?
465
00:16:58,585 --> 00:17:00,452
-Why did you put it in the car?
-Yeah, why is it in there?
466
00:17:00,454 --> 00:17:02,587
"because it was ridiculous
to leave him in the street."
467
00:17:02,589 --> 00:17:03,856
Well, it happened --
468
00:17:03,858 --> 00:17:05,190
It was ridiculous
to leave him in the street.
469
00:17:05,192 --> 00:17:06,659
Why would you
put it in the car?
470
00:17:06,661 --> 00:17:07,726
"you guys
have got scrubs on.
471
00:17:07,728 --> 00:17:09,461
I thought you guys
could save him."
472
00:17:09,463 --> 00:17:11,596
Oh, I'm sorry.
You guys have the scrubs on.
473
00:17:11,598 --> 00:17:12,731
I thought that you guys...
474
00:17:14,201 --> 00:17:15,868
Oh, dental students.
475
00:17:15,870 --> 00:17:18,937
Okay, listen. Understood.
I totally apologize.
476
00:17:18,939 --> 00:17:20,138
Alright, you ready, bud?
477
00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:21,874
Okay. I'm ready.
Go handle your business.
478
00:17:21,876 --> 00:17:24,142
Post, febreze the [bleep]
out of the car.
479
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:25,810
Oh, yeah. I got this.
No, don't touch it.
480
00:17:25,812 --> 00:17:27,412
Don't touch it anymore.
481
00:17:27,414 --> 00:17:28,681
No, I got you guys.
It's fine.
482
00:17:28,683 --> 00:17:30,082
No, it's fine.
483
00:17:30,084 --> 00:17:33,151
It neutralizes on contact,
this stuff, though.
484
00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:34,286
[ laughing ]
485
00:17:34,288 --> 00:17:36,088
I don't know.
This is insane.
486
00:17:36,090 --> 00:17:38,757
Post, say, "we do accept tips,
by the way."
487
00:17:38,759 --> 00:17:39,824
We do accept tips.
488
00:17:39,826 --> 00:17:42,427
There's no tip.
There's no tip here.
489
00:17:42,429 --> 00:17:44,963
This job is
[bleep] bullshit!
490
00:17:44,965 --> 00:17:48,100
This is bullshit!
491
00:17:48,102 --> 00:17:49,834
It's my first day.
492
00:17:49,836 --> 00:17:51,904
Murr:
Alright, q, last one.
493
00:17:51,906 --> 00:17:53,172
Going home?
Done with work?
494
00:17:55,709 --> 00:17:57,041
Say, "oh, if you got
to leave early,
495
00:17:57,043 --> 00:17:59,244
Let me get my groceries
out of your car."
496
00:17:59,246 --> 00:18:01,446
[ laughter ]
497
00:18:01,448 --> 00:18:02,581
Yeah, you can stop
right there
498
00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:03,916
'cause if you're
gonna leave early,
499
00:18:03,918 --> 00:18:06,050
I just got to --
500
00:18:06,052 --> 00:18:08,653
Sal: Q, you got to say it.
It's a punishment.
501
00:18:08,655 --> 00:18:10,689
I just got to get my groceries
out of your car.
502
00:18:12,593 --> 00:18:13,826
Yeah. Okay.
503
00:18:15,862 --> 00:18:17,662
I don't think
he believes you yet.
504
00:18:17,664 --> 00:18:18,863
Oh, my god.
505
00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:20,265
Murr: Oh!
506
00:18:20,267 --> 00:18:22,667
Yeah. Just get these out.
I'll just put this over there.
507
00:18:22,669 --> 00:18:24,136
Yeah, I got it.
Just help me out.
508
00:18:24,138 --> 00:18:26,939
Yeah, just grab those.
I'll put them right here.
509
00:18:26,941 --> 00:18:28,140
Oh, okay, great.
Thank you.
510
00:18:28,142 --> 00:18:29,474
Murr: He's helping!
511
00:18:29,476 --> 00:18:31,610
Alright, post, get out
of here. Go get him.
512
00:18:31,612 --> 00:18:33,545
I think that's it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
513
00:18:33,547 --> 00:18:35,680
And I got flowers
for the wife.
514
00:18:35,682 --> 00:18:37,950
Q, "can you grab the fireworks
out of the back seat for me?"
515
00:18:37,952 --> 00:18:40,285
Yeah. And the fire...
516
00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:43,421
You traveled across
state lines to get fireworks.
517
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:45,824
The fireworks? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I got the fireworks, too.
518
00:18:45,826 --> 00:18:47,892
Murr:
Oh, q, here comes post.
519
00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:50,829
Post: Boss, did you show him --
did you show him this?
520
00:18:50,831 --> 00:18:52,897
What's that?
Did you show him this?
521
00:18:52,899 --> 00:18:55,167
I did not show him this.
522
00:18:55,169 --> 00:18:56,501
Thank you very much.
Yes, sir.
523
00:18:56,503 --> 00:18:58,837
You piece of [bleep]
you got a ticket?
524
00:18:58,839 --> 00:19:02,641
Yeah. Oh, yeah. So --
so the thing is...
525
00:19:02,643 --> 00:19:04,643
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
526
00:19:04,645 --> 00:19:07,112
When I went to get the
fireworks, I parked
527
00:19:07,114 --> 00:19:10,048
The car a little bit too long,
and they gave me a ticket,
528
00:19:10,050 --> 00:19:12,116
Which is on your car
and your license plate
529
00:19:12,118 --> 00:19:13,251
And stuff like that.
-Yeah, $40.
530
00:19:13,253 --> 00:19:15,120
[ laughing ]
531
00:19:15,122 --> 00:19:16,388
But you know what
the good thing is?
532
00:19:16,390 --> 00:19:18,857
That's no points
on your license.
533
00:19:18,859 --> 00:19:20,525
Murr:
He's paying, q.
534
00:19:20,527 --> 00:19:22,661
Yeah, you got to pay that,
because if you do that,
535
00:19:22,663 --> 00:19:25,197
What they do is,
they put fees and...
536
00:19:26,801 --> 00:19:29,468
-Perfect, perfect, perfect.
-Here's the turn.
537
00:19:29,470 --> 00:19:31,536
Yeah, I don't think you
should have done that, boss.
538
00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:33,138
[ laughs ]
539
00:19:36,943 --> 00:19:38,343
Sir, it was not me.
540
00:19:38,345 --> 00:19:41,046
It was my boss here, sir.
I just -- I just work here.
541
00:19:44,218 --> 00:19:45,884
Oh! Oh!
Oh!
542
00:19:45,886 --> 00:19:47,151
I wasn't expecting that.
543
00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:48,821
Yeah. I didn't...
544
00:19:48,823 --> 00:19:50,489
Oh, no.
545
00:19:50,491 --> 00:19:51,423
You don't have to
call the cops.
546
00:19:54,561 --> 00:19:56,095
Oh, I didn't kill no one.
547
00:19:58,699 --> 00:19:59,898
I'll take care of it.
548
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:01,500
Q, "the fireworks
are worth $60.
549
00:20:01,502 --> 00:20:04,302
I'll give them to you,
and you just give me 20 bucks."
550
00:20:04,304 --> 00:20:05,637
Well, he's calling
the cops, guys.
551
00:20:05,639 --> 00:20:08,040
Murr: The punishment's over
if you say it.
552
00:20:08,042 --> 00:20:09,974
Alright.
The fireworks are worth $60.
553
00:20:09,976 --> 00:20:11,376
I'll give them to you,
you just give me $20,
554
00:20:11,378 --> 00:20:12,678
And we're all set.
555
00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:17,649
[ laughter ]
556
00:20:17,651 --> 00:20:19,317
Fix this. Fix this.
557
00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:21,386
I got to fix this?!
You fix this!
558
00:20:21,388 --> 00:20:22,721
You're over here
telling him --
you fix this.
559
00:20:22,723 --> 00:20:23,655
What is the matter
with you?!
560
00:20:23,657 --> 00:20:25,057
He's on the phone
with the cops.
561
00:20:25,059 --> 00:20:26,658
Get him off the phone.
562
00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:29,528
Get ready to bail post malone
and q out of jail.
563
00:20:29,530 --> 00:20:31,196
Not me.
Don't sign me up for this.
564
00:20:31,198 --> 00:20:32,665
Oh, you're going down
for this.
565
00:20:32,667 --> 00:20:33,866
You're going down
for this one.
No, no, no.
566
00:20:33,868 --> 00:20:35,200
Q's going to jail.
567
00:20:35,202 --> 00:20:37,269
[ laughing ]
568
00:20:37,271 --> 00:20:40,272
Sal: He started off helping you
remove the groceries,
569
00:20:40,274 --> 00:20:42,006
And he ended
with calling the cops.
570
00:20:42,008 --> 00:20:44,543
And I think that
is a success, my man.
571
00:20:44,545 --> 00:20:47,746
Do we need to still be here
for this, or is this over?
572
00:20:47,748 --> 00:20:49,682
-I think we can book it.
-I think we can book it.
573
00:20:49,684 --> 00:20:51,416
I think we should start
getting out of the vicinity.
574
00:20:51,418 --> 00:20:54,419
Why don't we just --
let me get my phone.
575
00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:56,488
Good job, post!
Great job, post.
576
00:20:56,490 --> 00:20:58,824
Everybody!
Good job, buddy.
577
00:21:00,694 --> 00:21:01,994
[ cat meows ]