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00:00:01,228 --> 00:00:03,585
- Here we go.
- For many kids,
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00:00:03,588 --> 00:00:06,551
Christmas morning wasthe
most exciting day of the year.
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00:00:06,554 --> 00:00:09,575
That's only because most
kids don't know the joy
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00:00:09,578 --> 00:00:12,500
of getting their college midterms back.
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00:00:12,503 --> 00:00:15,704
It also didn't hurt that Dr.
Sturgis looked like an elf.
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Nice work, Sheldon.
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00:00:20,243 --> 00:00:21,976
Now,
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00:00:21,979 --> 00:00:25,614
you'll notice that your
grades are lower than expected.
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00:00:25,617 --> 00:00:28,978
That's because Sheldon did so well,
10
00:00:28,980 --> 00:00:30,513
he broke the curve,
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00:00:30,515 --> 00:00:33,984
turning your A's and
B's into B's and C's.
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They don't seem happy about it.
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00:00:40,591 --> 00:00:42,425
Maybe you can give them candy.
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- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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Okay. This is where I spend all my time,
16
00:01:05,226 --> 00:01:08,520
yet somehow my ex-wife owns half of it.
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Mm, not bitter at all. Good for you.
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We got baseball over here
and got football right there
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and then hunting and
fishing in the back.
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Oh, yeah.
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And this hockey puck has been here
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since Jimmy Carter was president.
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You'd think a sport with
a bunch of white boys
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beating each other up would
be more popular in Texas.
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So, you want to head out?
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00:01:31,075 --> 00:01:34,276
Oh, my grandson's been
wanting some weights.
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00:01:34,278 --> 00:01:35,811
Sheldon?
28
00:01:35,813 --> 00:01:38,947
Hell, can't he just lift
a soup can or something?
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00:01:38,949 --> 00:01:41,583
The other grandson. The
pretty one with the hair.
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00:01:41,585 --> 00:01:43,752
Ah. All right. Well, send him by.
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We'll give him the family
and friends discount.
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How big a discount?
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00:01:47,291 --> 00:01:51,293
Well, uh, depends on, uh,
how much fun we have tonight.
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00:01:51,295 --> 00:01:54,563
Are you putting a
price on my affections?
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Yeah, kinda.
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00:01:56,284 --> 00:01:57,800
You're gonna regret it.
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00:01:57,802 --> 00:01:59,501
I'm really fun.
38
00:02:02,139 --> 00:02:04,786
...fever down, try to
let the body heal itself.
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00:02:04,789 --> 00:02:07,376
Keep me advised. Picard out.
40
00:02:07,378 --> 00:02:08,960
Captain, the neutrino...
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00:02:10,781 --> 00:02:12,681
Cooper residence.
42
00:02:12,683 --> 00:02:14,789
- Hello, Sheldon.
- Dr. Sturgis.
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00:02:14,792 --> 00:02:16,766
I'd love to talk to you,
but I'm right in the middle
44
00:02:16,768 --> 00:02:19,481
of Star Trek: The Next
Generation. It's a good one.
45
00:02:19,484 --> 00:02:20,688
Geordi goes missing,
46
00:02:20,691 --> 00:02:23,225
but Wesley Crusher has a plan
to use neutrinos to locate him,
47
00:02:23,227 --> 00:02:25,632
since they'd be visible
to Geordi's visor.
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00:02:25,635 --> 00:02:28,325
I was actually calling
to speak to your father.
49
00:02:28,328 --> 00:02:31,531
But I'm glad you're having
fun with your friends.
50
00:02:31,534 --> 00:02:33,103
Hang on. I'll go get him.
51
00:02:34,479 --> 00:02:36,412
Dad! Phone call!
52
00:02:36,415 --> 00:02:38,582
Even though Dr. Sturgis was confused,
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00:02:38,585 --> 00:02:41,710
one day, Wesley Crusher
really would be my friend.
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Neat, huh?
55
00:02:44,415 --> 00:02:45,848
Hey, John.
56
00:02:45,850 --> 00:02:48,083
George. John Sturgis here.
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00:02:48,085 --> 00:02:49,981
That's why I said "Hey, John."
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Great.
59
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:55,090
I was wondering if we could
go out for a beer and talk.
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Oh. Well, aren't we talking right now?
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00:02:57,161 --> 00:02:59,361
Yes, but we had so much fun last time,
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I thought we could do it again.
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Gee, John, last time, you got drunk
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and threw up in my glove compartment.
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Did I?
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00:03:06,904 --> 00:03:09,671
Well, while I don't remember
any of that happening,
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I promise to be on my best behavior.
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00:03:12,206 --> 00:03:14,106
And the drinks are on me.
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00:03:14,109 --> 00:03:16,077
Na zdrowie!
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00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:20,983
That's, uh, "to our health" in Russian.
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00:03:20,985 --> 00:03:23,285
This is not the place to talk Russian.
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00:03:23,287 --> 00:03:25,487
So, what's up?
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00:03:25,489 --> 00:03:29,442
Well, Sheldon has been
doing extraordinarily well
74
00:03:29,445 --> 00:03:31,193
in his college physics class.
75
00:03:31,195 --> 00:03:33,428
I know. He made me put
his test up on the fridge,
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00:03:33,430 --> 00:03:36,198
next to Missy's drawing
of her hand as a turkey.
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00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:41,457
So, uh, the university has taken
notice of Sheldon's talents,
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and they would very much like him
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to enroll full-time.
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00:03:46,944 --> 00:03:49,778
Yeah, we've been down this road, John.
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00:03:49,780 --> 00:03:51,480
Sheldon's only ten.
82
00:03:51,482 --> 00:03:54,950
Mary and I both have jobs.
We just can't make it work.
83
00:03:54,952 --> 00:03:57,331
Well, that's why they
asked me to speak to you.
84
00:03:57,334 --> 00:03:59,067
They're looking to sweeten the pot.
85
00:03:59,070 --> 00:04:01,558
That's a gambling metaphor.
86
00:04:01,561 --> 00:04:04,395
A lesser-known version
is "sweeten the kitty."
87
00:04:04,398 --> 00:04:07,127
I assume the difference is regional,
88
00:04:07,130 --> 00:04:09,265
but I'm no etymologist.
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00:04:09,268 --> 00:04:11,900
This beer is yummy. Mmm!
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00:04:11,902 --> 00:04:14,195
So, what are they offering, John?
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00:04:14,198 --> 00:04:16,198
They thought it would
be easier on the family
92
00:04:16,201 --> 00:04:18,968
if you were employed at the university.
93
00:04:18,971 --> 00:04:21,071
- Really?
- Yes, that way,
94
00:04:21,074 --> 00:04:22,511
you could drive Sheldon
95
00:04:22,513 --> 00:04:25,156
and keep an eye on him while he's there.
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00:04:25,159 --> 00:04:26,644
But I'm a football coach.
97
00:04:26,647 --> 00:04:28,013
Does the school even have a team?
98
00:04:28,016 --> 00:04:29,216
Oh, yes, they do.
99
00:04:29,219 --> 00:04:30,685
They-they don't win much,
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00:04:30,687 --> 00:04:34,122
but they lead the league in injuries.
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00:04:34,124 --> 00:04:37,592
Well, guess that's a thing.
102
00:04:37,594 --> 00:04:39,194
Okay.
103
00:04:39,196 --> 00:04:42,597
Anyway, I believe
they're willing to, uh,
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00:04:42,599 --> 00:04:47,068
exceed your current salary
by a substantial amount.
105
00:04:47,070 --> 00:04:48,390
Is that so?
106
00:04:48,393 --> 00:04:49,738
Yes.
107
00:04:49,740 --> 00:04:51,960
They thought it would incentivize you.
108
00:04:51,963 --> 00:04:54,731
Well, John, they're not wrong.
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00:04:54,734 --> 00:04:57,568
Excellent!
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00:04:57,571 --> 00:04:59,671
Na zdrowie.
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00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:02,007
What the hell. Na zdrowie.
112
00:05:04,054 --> 00:05:05,554
How was Dr. Sturgis?
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00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:07,570
He's fine.
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00:05:07,573 --> 00:05:08,857
What did you two talk about?
115
00:05:08,859 --> 00:05:10,992
I don't know. S-Stuff.
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00:05:10,994 --> 00:05:12,460
Science stuff?
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00:05:12,462 --> 00:05:14,362
No. Just regular stuff.
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00:05:14,364 --> 00:05:17,687
Ooh, I bet he talked about
me. What did he say about me?
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00:05:17,690 --> 00:05:19,484
Sheldon, everything isn't about you.
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00:05:19,487 --> 00:05:21,535
Okay? Go to your room.
121
00:05:21,538 --> 00:05:23,139
Yes, sir.
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00:05:23,940 --> 00:05:25,806
What'd y'all talk about?
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00:05:25,809 --> 00:05:27,109
Sheldon.
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00:05:27,112 --> 00:05:28,777
Oh.
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00:05:30,213 --> 00:05:33,615
The university wants to
offer me a coaching job
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00:05:33,617 --> 00:05:36,242
if it'll help to get Sheldon
to go there full-time.
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00:05:36,245 --> 00:05:38,219
Oh.
128
00:05:38,221 --> 00:05:39,965
We talked about this.
129
00:05:39,968 --> 00:05:42,000
- College might be too much for him.
- I know.
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00:05:42,003 --> 00:05:43,337
That's why I'd be there, you know,
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00:05:43,339 --> 00:05:44,925
to help him over the rough spots.
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00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:46,494
I don't know, George.
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00:05:46,496 --> 00:05:49,064
Can't hurt to see what the offer is.
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00:05:49,066 --> 00:05:51,232
There are more important
things than money.
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00:05:51,234 --> 00:05:55,437
That's cute. You should
knit that on a pillow.
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00:05:55,439 --> 00:05:58,341
Maybe I'll push that
pillow over your face.
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00:06:03,223 --> 00:06:05,223
Scuse me. You Mr. Ballard?
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00:06:05,225 --> 00:06:06,458
Yeah, that'd be me.
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00:06:06,460 --> 00:06:09,207
I'm Georgie, Connie Tucker's grandson.
140
00:06:09,210 --> 00:06:10,328
Oh, yeah.
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00:06:10,330 --> 00:06:11,796
The hair. Very pretty.
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00:06:11,798 --> 00:06:14,432
Hang on a second. I got to
deal with this guy, okay?
143
00:06:14,434 --> 00:06:16,387
- Take your time.
- So,
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00:06:16,390 --> 00:06:18,357
here you go. Here's the
rod you were asking about.
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00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:19,759
Now, that's a good choice.
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00:06:19,762 --> 00:06:21,071
- Very solid.
- Mm. Mm.
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00:06:21,074 --> 00:06:22,774
And then I just brought this one along
148
00:06:22,776 --> 00:06:25,377
to show you, just in
case, later, you know,
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00:06:25,379 --> 00:06:27,245
you get serious about fishing.
150
00:06:27,247 --> 00:06:29,774
Well... I'm pretty serious.
151
00:06:29,777 --> 00:06:33,251
Yeah. You know, I-I had that feeling.
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00:06:33,253 --> 00:06:34,886
Wh-What's your name?
153
00:06:34,888 --> 00:06:35,920
- Jim.
- Jim.
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00:06:35,922 --> 00:06:38,490
Well, Jim, this rod is a little pricey.
155
00:06:38,492 --> 00:06:39,871
It's double the cost of that one,
156
00:06:39,874 --> 00:06:41,459
but it's worth every penny.
157
00:06:41,461 --> 00:06:43,766
And, uh, it's the rod I use.
158
00:06:43,769 --> 00:06:45,563
Well, then that's the one I want.
159
00:06:45,565 --> 00:06:47,074
Well, that's a good choice.
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00:06:47,077 --> 00:06:48,293
There you go.
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00:06:48,296 --> 00:06:50,534
Now, with a rod like this,
you want to use live bait,
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00:06:50,537 --> 00:06:51,803
and we don't carry that here.
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00:06:51,805 --> 00:06:55,801
But down the street is
Ed's Bait and Tackle Shop.
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00:06:55,804 --> 00:06:58,805
And if you tell him Dale sent
you, he'll take care of you.
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I appreciate that.
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00:07:00,105 --> 00:07:02,347
So, take her over there to Bernice,
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00:07:02,349 --> 00:07:05,283
- and she'll ring you up.
- Thanks.
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00:07:05,285 --> 00:07:06,543
Hey.
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00:07:06,546 --> 00:07:08,501
And-and bring me back some catfish.
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00:07:08,504 --> 00:07:10,152
You bet.
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00:07:10,155 --> 00:07:11,318
Yeah.
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00:07:11,321 --> 00:07:12,555
You're a really good salesman.
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00:07:12,558 --> 00:07:13,758
Well, yeah. Not only that,
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00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:16,494
I get a kickback on
everybody I send down to Ed's.
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00:07:16,496 --> 00:07:17,996
You're awesome.
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00:07:17,998 --> 00:07:19,543
I know.
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00:07:21,401 --> 00:07:23,968
Ooh. 35 cents off Goober.
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00:07:23,970 --> 00:07:25,087
What's Goober?
179
00:07:25,090 --> 00:07:26,938
Peanut butter and jelly in the same jar.
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00:07:26,941 --> 00:07:29,107
Think about how much time we'd save.
181
00:07:29,109 --> 00:07:30,175
Hey.
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00:07:30,177 --> 00:07:31,242
Dale give you a good price
183
00:07:31,244 --> 00:07:32,644
on those weights?
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00:07:32,646 --> 00:07:34,446
Better. He gave me a job.
185
00:07:34,449 --> 00:07:36,785
Damn. He did have fun last night.
186
00:07:36,788 --> 00:07:38,816
- What kind of job?
- Salesman.
187
00:07:38,819 --> 00:07:41,386
Well, congratulations.
188
00:07:41,388 --> 00:07:42,649
I'm gonna learn a lot from him.
189
00:07:42,652 --> 00:07:44,355
He's real good at getting
people to spend money
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00:07:44,357 --> 00:07:45,623
on stuff they don't need.
191
00:07:45,625 --> 00:07:48,793
Well, I don't know if I
like the sound of that.
192
00:07:48,795 --> 00:07:51,630
You know what I like
the sound of? Ka-ching.
193
00:07:56,436 --> 00:07:58,670
Well, thank you.
194
00:07:58,672 --> 00:08:01,339
That's a very generous offer.
195
00:08:01,341 --> 00:08:03,341
Let me discuss it with my family,
196
00:08:03,343 --> 00:08:05,376
and I'll get back to you.
197
00:08:05,378 --> 00:08:07,979
Bye.
198
00:08:07,981 --> 00:08:09,981
What was that about?
199
00:08:09,983 --> 00:08:11,644
Are you my family?
200
00:08:11,647 --> 00:08:13,017
I don't know.
201
00:08:13,019 --> 00:08:15,821
I like to think of
myself as your work wife.
202
00:08:18,157 --> 00:08:21,658
So, that's why I wanted
to give you a heads-up.
203
00:08:21,661 --> 00:08:24,040
I got to tell you, George,
this is a real blow.
204
00:08:24,043 --> 00:08:27,180
Appreciate it. But, uh,
yeah, you'll find someone.
205
00:08:27,183 --> 00:08:29,501
There's a lot of good coaches out there.
206
00:08:29,503 --> 00:08:31,803
Not you. Sheldon.
207
00:08:31,805 --> 00:08:33,605
Sheldon?
208
00:08:33,607 --> 00:08:36,508
I thought everyone would be
thrilled for him to leave.
209
00:08:36,510 --> 00:08:37,876
Don't get me wrong,
210
00:08:37,879 --> 00:08:40,512
your kid is a royal pain in the ass.
211
00:08:40,514 --> 00:08:43,027
I have a problem with
this permission slip.
212
00:08:43,030 --> 00:08:44,649
You didn't cut them in half evenly.
213
00:08:44,651 --> 00:08:47,243
Mine has two holes, and
Derek here just has one.
214
00:08:47,246 --> 00:08:48,419
Then trade.
215
00:08:48,421 --> 00:08:50,909
Then Derek will have two
holes, and mine will have one.
216
00:08:50,912 --> 00:08:53,329
You're not going to
the water park anyway!
217
00:08:53,332 --> 00:08:56,884
However, his state test
scores are so extraordinary,
218
00:08:56,887 --> 00:08:59,297
the school actually gets
more funding because of it.
219
00:08:59,299 --> 00:09:00,426
You serious?
220
00:09:00,429 --> 00:09:03,918
Serious as the fire alarms,
which are now functional.
221
00:09:03,921 --> 00:09:08,323
And always were, if anyone asks.
222
00:09:08,326 --> 00:09:11,634
I don't know what to tell you, Tom.
223
00:09:11,637 --> 00:09:14,485
They're offering me a pretty nice raise.
224
00:09:14,488 --> 00:09:16,899
Well, I can't afford to lose Sheldon,
225
00:09:16,902 --> 00:09:20,084
so what's it gonna take
to keep y'all here, George?
226
00:09:22,289 --> 00:09:24,122
Thank you.
227
00:09:24,124 --> 00:09:27,397
I will discuss it with my
family and get back to you.
228
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,600
Good.
229
00:09:35,714 --> 00:09:38,282
Bit of a kerfuffle at the church today.
230
00:09:38,285 --> 00:09:40,505
Pastor Jeff promised Patricia Richards
231
00:09:40,507 --> 00:09:42,829
she could sing "How
Great Thou Art" on Sunday,
232
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:45,040
but I had already
printed in the bulletin
233
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:47,245
that Karen Baker was gonna sing it.
234
00:09:47,248 --> 00:09:49,884
They agreed to a duet, but it was
235
00:09:49,887 --> 00:09:51,516
touch and go.
236
00:09:51,518 --> 00:09:53,446
- Mm.
- What's a kerfuffle?
237
00:09:53,449 --> 00:09:54,985
Not that.
238
00:09:54,988 --> 00:09:55,987
Hey.
239
00:09:55,989 --> 00:09:58,058
Hey. How was your first day at work?
240
00:09:58,061 --> 00:09:59,057
Amazing.
241
00:09:59,059 --> 00:10:01,459
I made $38 on commissions alone.
242
00:10:01,461 --> 00:10:03,399
Well, good for you.
243
00:10:03,402 --> 00:10:04,962
What's for dinner?
244
00:10:04,964 --> 00:10:06,126
Meatloaf.
245
00:10:06,129 --> 00:10:08,466
Oh. I think I'm gonna go out to eat.
246
00:10:08,468 --> 00:10:09,767
No, you are not.
247
00:10:09,769 --> 00:10:11,563
We're having dinner as a family.
248
00:10:11,566 --> 00:10:13,838
Yeah, but I got money now
and I can do what I want.
249
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:16,441
And what I want is a
chimichanga at Chi-Chi's.
250
00:10:16,443 --> 00:10:18,171
I want a chimichanga from Chi-Chi's.
251
00:10:18,174 --> 00:10:19,907
They do have a good margarita.
252
00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:22,246
You are eating here. So are you.
253
00:10:22,248 --> 00:10:24,582
I don't care what you do.
254
00:10:24,584 --> 00:10:25,616
Later.
255
00:10:25,618 --> 00:10:27,585
Georgie Cooper.
256
00:10:27,587 --> 00:10:29,637
Do not walk out of that door.
257
00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:30,798
Georgie!
258
00:10:30,801 --> 00:10:32,757
That's a kerfuffle.
259
00:10:32,759 --> 00:10:35,560
Missy, let this be a lesson to you.
260
00:10:35,562 --> 00:10:37,935
The love of money is
the root of all evil.
261
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,126
Hey!
262
00:10:39,129 --> 00:10:40,722
You would not believe the wheelin'
263
00:10:40,725 --> 00:10:42,282
and dealin' I did today.
264
00:10:42,285 --> 00:10:43,735
I'm playing the high school
265
00:10:43,737 --> 00:10:45,970
and the university against each other.
266
00:10:45,972 --> 00:10:47,933
Hey, what do you say
we go out to dinner?
267
00:10:47,936 --> 00:10:49,173
Chi-Chi's is good.
268
00:10:49,175 --> 00:10:51,394
Ooh, chimichangas.
269
00:10:56,149 --> 00:10:59,183
I've asked you all here
because we got a situation.
270
00:10:59,185 --> 00:11:03,454
George Cooper's considering
a job at a college and...
271
00:11:03,456 --> 00:11:05,189
taking Sheldon with him.
272
00:11:05,191 --> 00:11:07,282
- Yes!
- Is it far away?
273
00:11:07,285 --> 00:11:09,423
- I hope it's far away.
- Maybe it's overseas.
274
00:11:09,426 --> 00:11:11,282
- Ooh, like Fiji.
- Hold your horses.
275
00:11:11,285 --> 00:11:15,225
If Sheldon walks out that
door, our test scores drop hard.
276
00:11:15,228 --> 00:11:17,829
That affects funding,
which affects your salaries.
277
00:11:17,832 --> 00:11:20,909
Ugh. Well, how can we help?
278
00:11:20,912 --> 00:11:23,813
Y'all need to make George
and Sheldon so happy here
279
00:11:23,816 --> 00:11:25,376
they want to stay.
280
00:11:25,378 --> 00:11:26,511
Oh, come on.
281
00:11:26,513 --> 00:11:28,379
Isn't there anything else we can do?
282
00:11:28,381 --> 00:11:29,781
Yeah, Mr. Givens.
283
00:11:29,783 --> 00:11:31,983
You could do a better job at
teaching the other students
284
00:11:31,985 --> 00:11:36,455
so we don't rely on one boy
to pull up everyone's grades.
285
00:11:38,591 --> 00:11:41,359
Fine. We'll be nice to Sheldon.
286
00:11:42,926 --> 00:11:45,860
♪ I've been working
for the big man ♪
287
00:11:45,863 --> 00:11:48,599
♪ All the livelong day ♪
288
00:11:48,601 --> 00:11:51,298
♪ I've been working
for the big man ♪
289
00:11:51,301 --> 00:11:53,969
♪ Just to wash my sins away. ♪
290
00:11:53,972 --> 00:11:55,838
Hey, Mary. What's up?
291
00:11:55,841 --> 00:11:58,075
Can I speak with you
about a spiritual matter?
292
00:11:58,078 --> 00:11:59,712
My sweet spot. Sit.
293
00:12:00,649 --> 00:12:01,782
What's the buzz?
294
00:12:01,785 --> 00:12:03,949
Tell me, what's a-happenin'?
295
00:12:05,287 --> 00:12:06,553
Jesus Christ Superstar.
296
00:12:06,556 --> 00:12:07,688
It's a great show.
297
00:12:07,691 --> 00:12:10,188
Well, um...
298
00:12:10,190 --> 00:12:13,624
I'm concerned George and Georgie
299
00:12:13,626 --> 00:12:16,060
might be succumbing to the sin of greed.
300
00:12:16,062 --> 00:12:17,376
Ooh, that's a biggie.
301
00:12:17,379 --> 00:12:19,497
Ever since Georgie started making money,
302
00:12:19,499 --> 00:12:21,805
he's been very disrespectful.
303
00:12:21,808 --> 00:12:24,769
Meanwhile, my husband's so busy
trying to land a better job,
304
00:12:24,772 --> 00:12:27,305
he doesn't even care how
it might affect Sheldon.
305
00:12:27,308 --> 00:12:28,673
I'm sorry to hear that.
306
00:12:28,675 --> 00:12:31,503
In Luke 12:15, Jesus says, "Watch out.
307
00:12:31,506 --> 00:12:34,274
Be on your guard against
all kinds of greed.
308
00:12:34,277 --> 00:12:36,970
Life does not consist in an
abundance of possessions."
309
00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:38,907
I know, but it seems
like the whole world
310
00:12:38,910 --> 00:12:41,152
is sending the opposite message.
311
00:12:41,155 --> 00:12:42,353
Don't I know it.
312
00:12:42,355 --> 00:12:43,888
Just the other day, I was at the mall
313
00:12:43,890 --> 00:12:45,623
and a toaster oven caught my eye.
314
00:12:45,625 --> 00:12:47,962
Next thing you know, I
was in line to buy it,
315
00:12:47,965 --> 00:12:50,272
and I realized I have a toaster
316
00:12:50,275 --> 00:12:53,009
and I have an oven. What am I doing?
317
00:12:53,012 --> 00:12:54,899
Turns out Satan doesn't just hide out
318
00:12:54,901 --> 00:12:56,295
in honky-tonks and casinos.
319
00:12:56,298 --> 00:12:58,665
Sometimes he's in the
appliance section of Sears.
320
00:12:58,668 --> 00:13:02,957
Well, if it's everywhere,
how can we fight it?
321
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:04,962
We may not be able to control the world,
322
00:13:04,965 --> 00:13:07,318
but we can control our homes.
323
00:13:07,321 --> 00:13:09,321
It's up to us to create an environment
324
00:13:09,324 --> 00:13:11,613
where the sin of greed
can find no purchase.
325
00:13:11,616 --> 00:13:13,415
Is that what you've done in your home?
326
00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:15,519
Well, I do make my toast vertically,
327
00:13:15,521 --> 00:13:17,121
two slices at a time.
328
00:13:17,123 --> 00:13:20,191
Take that, Satan.
329
00:13:25,197 --> 00:13:27,364
Then Geordi goes missing,
but Wesley Crusher
330
00:13:27,366 --> 00:13:29,730
has a plan to use
neutrinos to locate him,
331
00:13:29,733 --> 00:13:32,066
since they'd be visible
to Geordi's visor.
332
00:13:32,069 --> 00:13:33,113
Is that so?
333
00:13:33,116 --> 00:13:34,215
It is.
334
00:13:34,218 --> 00:13:35,555
I recorded the episode.
335
00:13:35,558 --> 00:13:37,006
I'll show it to you tonight.
336
00:13:37,009 --> 00:13:38,152
That's okay.
337
00:13:38,155 --> 00:13:39,683
You did such a good job explaining it,
338
00:13:39,686 --> 00:13:41,045
I feel like I saw it.
339
00:13:41,047 --> 00:13:42,380
You're still seeing it.
340
00:13:44,078 --> 00:13:45,211
What's this?
341
00:13:47,119 --> 00:13:49,058
"Reserved for Coach Cooper."
342
00:13:50,507 --> 00:13:52,196
Would you look at that. They gave me
343
00:13:52,199 --> 00:13:53,857
a parking spot right by the door.
344
00:13:53,859 --> 00:13:55,074
Why?
345
00:13:55,077 --> 00:13:56,743
I guess they're starting to appreciate
346
00:13:56,746 --> 00:13:58,308
my talents around here.
347
00:13:58,311 --> 00:13:59,488
Why?
348
00:13:59,491 --> 00:14:01,434
"BY BARRETT STRONG PLAYING)
349
00:14:01,436 --> 00:14:03,533
Oh! There's my man.
350
00:14:03,536 --> 00:14:05,402
Where?
351
00:14:05,404 --> 00:14:06,603
You, silly.
352
00:14:06,605 --> 00:14:09,440
I'm neither a man, nor
silly, but all right.
353
00:14:09,442 --> 00:14:12,009
You're so funny, Sheldon.
354
00:14:12,011 --> 00:14:13,544
Oh, well, that I am.
355
00:14:13,546 --> 00:14:17,481
These are the flyers for
the canned food drive.
356
00:14:17,483 --> 00:14:19,363
And, Sheldon, you'll be happy to know,
357
00:14:19,366 --> 00:14:21,284
I made sure they were cut perfectly,
358
00:14:21,287 --> 00:14:25,089
so that each one has
exactly one and a half holes.
359
00:14:25,091 --> 00:14:27,224
But mine has half a hole on the top,
360
00:14:27,226 --> 00:14:30,228
and Derek's here has
half a hole on the bottom.
361
00:14:34,608 --> 00:14:37,784
Ooh. What do we have here?
362
00:14:39,157 --> 00:14:41,037
Ooh.
363
00:14:49,087 --> 00:14:51,447
Hey, how come you get
to park by the door?
364
00:14:51,450 --> 00:14:55,319
Don't bother me, Wayne. I'm sitting.
365
00:14:55,321 --> 00:14:57,321
And you got a new chair, too?
366
00:15:01,154 --> 00:15:03,660
Are we going to watch
an educational film?
367
00:15:03,662 --> 00:15:05,829
We're gonna watch Star Trek.
368
00:15:05,831 --> 00:15:07,731
Star Trek in school?
369
00:15:07,733 --> 00:15:08,889
Wowie Zowie.
370
00:15:12,405 --> 00:15:13,542
What's here?
371
00:15:15,041 --> 00:15:17,875
Ooh, a golden whistle.
372
00:15:17,877 --> 00:15:20,277
What the hell is going on?
373
00:15:21,914 --> 00:15:24,048
You wanted to see me?
374
00:15:24,050 --> 00:15:26,750
When don't I want to see
you, Sheldon? Come in.
375
00:15:26,752 --> 00:15:30,108
I have something I'd like to give you.
376
00:15:31,357 --> 00:15:34,162
This is a key to the faculty restroom.
377
00:15:34,165 --> 00:15:35,959
No students allowed.
378
00:15:35,961 --> 00:15:37,628
One person at a time.
379
00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:39,296
And unlike the other restrooms,
380
00:15:39,298 --> 00:15:42,366
this one gets cleaned every night.
381
00:15:44,537 --> 00:15:45,602
Thank you.
382
00:15:45,604 --> 00:15:47,371
No, Sheldon.
383
00:15:47,373 --> 00:15:48,539
Thank you.
384
00:15:48,541 --> 00:15:50,174
You're welcome.
385
00:15:55,157 --> 00:15:56,358
It's all yours.
386
00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:08,390
I think this show is
teaching you bad lessons.
387
00:16:08,392 --> 00:16:10,392
Don't worry. I'm a slow learner.
388
00:16:10,395 --> 00:16:12,062
Fascinating.
389
00:16:14,331 --> 00:16:17,699
Is that Goober? Where did you get that?
390
00:16:17,701 --> 00:16:19,866
Georgie got it for me. He's rich now.
391
00:16:19,869 --> 00:16:21,101
That is it!
392
00:16:21,104 --> 00:16:23,859
I am taking this house
back from the devil.
393
00:16:26,425 --> 00:16:27,558
Hey.
394
00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:30,813
I've been accused
395
00:16:30,815 --> 00:16:33,148
of overreacting from time to time.
396
00:16:33,150 --> 00:16:36,886
But perhaps it's hereditary,
because look at my mommy go.
397
00:17:06,450 --> 00:17:07,950
Aw.
398
00:17:07,952 --> 00:17:09,702
What happened to all our stuff?
399
00:17:09,705 --> 00:17:12,054
Mom went nuts and took everything away.
400
00:17:12,056 --> 00:17:14,823
How am I supposed to
watch Professor Proton?
401
00:17:14,825 --> 00:17:17,192
All my music and magazines are gone.
402
00:17:17,194 --> 00:17:19,062
Where is your mother?
403
00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:22,731
You want to explain yourself?
404
00:17:24,768 --> 00:17:27,863
I am taking our house back
from the forces of evil.
405
00:17:27,866 --> 00:17:29,699
What's evil about Black Sabbath?
406
00:17:29,702 --> 00:17:30,827
You're not helping.
407
00:17:30,830 --> 00:17:33,041
Greed has entered into your hearts,
408
00:17:33,043 --> 00:17:34,460
especially you two.
409
00:17:34,463 --> 00:17:35,711
It has not.
410
00:17:35,713 --> 00:17:37,212
Is that a gold whistle?
411
00:17:37,214 --> 00:17:38,695
Huh? No.
412
00:17:38,698 --> 00:17:41,149
It's... it's a gift.
413
00:17:41,151 --> 00:17:43,318
Now, where's our stuff? We want it back.
414
00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:44,453
I'm not telling.
415
00:17:44,455 --> 00:17:46,421
Mary, don't make me ask again.
416
00:17:46,423 --> 00:17:47,737
Or what?
417
00:17:49,426 --> 00:17:50,557
What?
418
00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:53,294
Your daughter lost her mind
and we want to watch TV.
419
00:17:53,297 --> 00:17:55,497
But... Uh, Dale's coming over.
420
00:17:55,499 --> 00:17:57,479
- Great.
- Love that guy.
421
00:18:00,971 --> 00:18:03,372
Okay, we got a problem.
422
00:18:03,374 --> 00:18:05,390
I don't know what kind of
423
00:18:05,393 --> 00:18:07,546
religious gobbledygook
you're going through,
424
00:18:07,549 --> 00:18:09,778
but it is starting to affect me.
425
00:18:09,780 --> 00:18:12,921
- Your hands aren't clean in this.
- I beg your pardon.
426
00:18:12,924 --> 00:18:15,588
Your new friend Dale
is encouraging Georgie
427
00:18:15,591 --> 00:18:17,112
to be obsessed with money.
428
00:18:17,115 --> 00:18:18,314
Your husband's no good at it.
429
00:18:18,317 --> 00:18:19,971
You ought to be happy your son is.
430
00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:22,108
George is no prize either.
431
00:18:22,111 --> 00:18:24,663
Not worrying about
what's right for Sheldon.
432
00:18:24,666 --> 00:18:26,948
Well, what do you
think is right for him?
433
00:18:26,951 --> 00:18:28,450
Honestly?
434
00:18:28,453 --> 00:18:30,674
I don't know.
435
00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:33,057
I know that he's bored in high school,
436
00:18:33,060 --> 00:18:35,846
but he's just so young for college.
437
00:18:35,849 --> 00:18:37,268
Well, it sounds like they're trying
438
00:18:37,271 --> 00:18:39,135
to set George up there for him.
439
00:18:39,138 --> 00:18:41,138
I know.
440
00:18:43,511 --> 00:18:45,596
Maybe it's me.
441
00:18:45,599 --> 00:18:49,434
Maybe I'm not ready
for my baby to grow up.
442
00:18:49,437 --> 00:18:51,971
No mother ever is.
443
00:18:57,460 --> 00:18:59,838
I just want to keep my family safe.
444
00:18:59,841 --> 00:19:01,574
I know.
445
00:19:01,577 --> 00:19:04,065
But at some point,
you got to let them go.
446
00:19:04,764 --> 00:19:06,430
And then one day, if you're lucky,
447
00:19:06,433 --> 00:19:08,276
they'll move across the street from you
448
00:19:08,279 --> 00:19:10,147
and absolutely ruin your life.
449
00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,221
Seriously, get those
people out of my house.
450
00:19:15,224 --> 00:19:16,237
Okay.
451
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:18,229
Eventually, my mother relented
452
00:19:18,232 --> 00:19:21,221
and returned our things
with a few minor adjustments.
453
00:19:22,493 --> 00:19:23,979
What's The Moosewood Gang?
454
00:19:23,982 --> 00:19:28,198
They solve mysteries
while they learn about God.
455
00:19:28,201 --> 00:19:29,434
Great.
456
00:19:29,437 --> 00:19:32,526
Georgie got his music back.
457
00:19:32,529 --> 00:19:34,596
♪ Jesus Christ ♪
458
00:19:34,598 --> 00:19:36,932
♪ Superstar... ♪
459
00:19:36,934 --> 00:19:39,541
What the hell is this?
460
00:19:39,544 --> 00:19:40,986
And as for college,
461
00:19:40,989 --> 00:19:42,635
my mother and father discussed it
462
00:19:42,638 --> 00:19:45,005
and decided that ten was too young.
463
00:19:45,008 --> 00:19:48,810
So I didn't start till
the ripe old age of 11.
464
00:19:48,813 --> 00:19:51,307
In the meantime...
465
00:19:52,799 --> 00:19:56,573
...I had the key to one sweet bathroom.
466
00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:07,577
And we have brand-new
designs on awesome gifts.
467
00:20:07,580 --> 00:20:10,166
And don't forget about
our layaway options.
468
00:20:13,275 --> 00:20:15,477
Lord, give me strength.
469
00:20:28,745 --> 00:20:30,659
I'm sorry, God. I'm weak.
470
00:20:30,662 --> 00:20:35,823
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