1
00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:03,070
Previously on Young Sheldon...
Who are you?

2
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:05,539
I'm Paige.
This is a very advanced class.

3
00:00:05,539 --> 00:00:07,841
Do you know how to differentiate
under the integral sign?

4
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:09,142
No.

5
00:00:09,142 --> 00:00:10,344
(chuckling):
Do you know anything?

6
00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:12,279
I know you're in my spot.

7
00:00:12,279 --> 00:00:15,282
These are parents
we can actually relate to.

8
00:00:15,282 --> 00:00:16,817
Sounds good.
Oh, thank you, Lord,

9
00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:18,418
for connecting us
with the parents

10
00:00:18,418 --> 00:00:20,153
of another special child.

11
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You kids are special, too.

12
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:26,760
I used to work at the practice
with Barry, but I had to quit

13
00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:28,729
once Paige's schedule
started to get busy.

14
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Well, a unique child can
require a lot of attention.

15
00:00:31,565 --> 00:00:33,500
Try all the attention.

16
00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:35,569
Barry, it sounds like
you might be feeling left out.

17
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Sometimes I do.

18
00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:39,373
Don't you get him
another beer.

19
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Oh, come on. You love this,
and you know it.

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00:00:41,475 --> 00:00:43,577
They're as messed-up as we are.

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(bottle pops open)

22
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♪ ♪

23
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ADULT SHELDON: From a young age,
I was the proud member

24
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:57,791
of several elite organizations:

25
00:00:57,791 --> 00:00:59,459
The Radio Shack Battery Club,

26
00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:01,795
entitling the bearer
to the incredible bargain

27
00:01:01,795 --> 00:01:04,364
of one free battery per month.

28
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It's no wonder
they went out of business.

29
00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:08,802
Starfleet International,
entitling the bearer

30
00:01:08,802 --> 00:01:10,537
to say things like,
"I'm a member

31
00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:12,372
of Starfleet International."

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And best of all, the Natural
Science Museum of Texas,

33
00:01:16,643 --> 00:01:19,613
which included a free
subscription to their magazine.

34
00:01:19,613 --> 00:01:22,349
"The secrets
of carbon isotope dating."

35
00:01:22,349 --> 00:01:24,284
Juicy.

36
00:01:25,385 --> 00:01:27,654
Mom, can you make the salad?

37
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Sure.

38
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:31,792
Hey, don't put in
any of those little tomatoes.

39
00:01:31,792 --> 00:01:34,394
Hey, I don't tell you how
to impersonate a lump of clay.

40
00:01:34,394 --> 00:01:36,830
You don't tell me
how to make a salad.

41
00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:38,565
There's going to be a lecture
on carbon dating

42
00:01:38,565 --> 00:01:41,168
at the Natural Science Museum
on Saturday.

43
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Who would like to take me?

44
00:01:42,602 --> 00:01:44,571
You know what? I'd be happy to.

45
00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:46,807
What happened to helping me
at my yard sale?

46
00:01:46,807 --> 00:01:48,809
Ooh, is that this Saturday?

47
00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:50,177
I'm sorry.

48
00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:51,712
I'm taking him
to a lecture on, uh...

49
00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:52,946
what is it? Carbonation?

50
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:54,748
Carbon dating.
A method of determining

51
00:01:54,748 --> 00:01:56,616
the age of artifacts
and fossils.

52
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:59,686
Hey, we could use that to figure
out how old your grandma is.

53
00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:01,421
That won't work.

54
00:02:01,421 --> 00:02:03,190
You can't carbon-date
something that's alive.

55
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Well, then, we'll just chop
her down and count the rings.

56
00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:10,464
Oh, George, did my "lump
of clay" remark strike a nerve?

57
00:02:11,498 --> 00:02:13,467
A little.

58
00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:15,736
(laughs)

59
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:18,705
♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪

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00:02:18,705 --> 00:02:21,575
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪

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♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪

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♪ I am a mighty little man ♪

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♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪

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Dad, do you believe that fossils
are millions of years old?

65
00:02:40,627 --> 00:02:42,763
I guess. Why?

66
00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:47,367
Well, Mom believes the world was
only created 6,000 years ago.

67
00:02:47,367 --> 00:02:48,902
Yeah. So?

68
00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:52,406
Are these differences a
sticking point in your marriage?

69
00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:53,874
Not at all.

70
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:55,909
Why?
Simple.

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We never talk about it.

72
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So you just avoid discussing
topics you don't agree on?

73
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At all costs.

74
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Hearing that further convinces
me I'll never get married.

75
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Never say never.

76
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Why not? You just said it twice.

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All right, as soon as I get
these tables set up on the lawn,

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y'all can start
bringing that stuff out.

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You think you're gonna get ten
bucks for this piece of junk?

80
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Hey, that piece of junk
is a wedding gift

81
00:03:22,803 --> 00:03:24,938
from my cheap-ass
Cousin Betty.

82
00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:27,407
And I was gonna leave
a little room to haggle.

83
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What's a haggle?

84
00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:31,044
Negotiating.
You start high,

85
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,780
they offer less, then you meet
somewhere in the middle.

86
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Leaves them feeling like,
you know, they got a deal.

87
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Did they?
(giggling):
Not if you did it right.

88
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How much are we getting paid
today?

89
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You're not getting paid squat.
You're helping out your meemaw.

90
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That doesn't seem fair.

91
00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:46,827
Yeah, we should
get something.

92
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Fine.

93
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How much you want?

94
00:03:49,796 --> 00:03:50,931
Five dollars.
Each.

95
00:03:50,931 --> 00:03:52,065
Each.

96
00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:54,534
That's pretty steep.

97
00:03:54,534 --> 00:03:57,737
How about I give you
a buck apiece?

98
00:03:57,737 --> 00:04:00,073
Let's meet in the middle--
three dollars each.

99
00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:02,008
Now we're haggling.

100
00:04:02,008 --> 00:04:03,710
Let me ask you a question.

101
00:04:03,710 --> 00:04:05,078
If you break something today,

102
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:07,447
are you prepared
to cover the cost of that?

103
00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:08,982
No.
Nuh-uh.
Mm.

104
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:10,884
Well, we're gonna have
to factor that in.

105
00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:12,986
And did you bring
your own lunch?

106
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:15,555
You said we were
getting pizza.

107
00:04:15,555 --> 00:04:17,557
Well, I did,
but pizza ain't free.

108
00:04:17,557 --> 00:04:19,326
And I'm teaching you
about negotiating,

109
00:04:19,326 --> 00:04:21,761
which is a pretty valuable
life lesson, right?

110
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,497
Yeah.
I guess so.

111
00:04:23,497 --> 00:04:25,499
So, if my math is right,

112
00:04:25,499 --> 00:04:29,736
you owe me...
two dollars each.

113
00:04:29,736 --> 00:04:31,338
We owe you?

114
00:04:31,338 --> 00:04:33,573
The numbers don't lie.

115
00:04:34,741 --> 00:04:35,876
Dang it.

116
00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:37,844
All right, listen.

117
00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:39,880
I love ya, and you're family,

118
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:43,350
so if you do it for nothing,
we'll call it even.

119
00:04:43,350 --> 00:04:44,785
Take it, take it, take it.

120
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,953
You got yourself a deal.

121
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:49,756
(sighs)
Y'all drive a hard bargain.

122
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(muffled laughter):
Now start bringing
that crap outside.

123
00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:55,529
(laughs)

124
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:05,405
SHELDON:
Oh, my.

125
00:05:05,405 --> 00:05:06,940
GEORGE SR.:
Yeah.

126
00:05:06,940 --> 00:05:08,642
I bet he dresses down

127
00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,977
to about 6,000, 7,000
pounds of USDA prime.

128
00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:12,412
You would eat him?

129
00:05:12,412 --> 00:05:14,047
He'd eat me.

130
00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:19,719
Wow. You're really
cleaning house.

131
00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:21,521
Got to get rid of
the old gar-bage,

132
00:05:21,521 --> 00:05:23,423
make room for the new gar-bage.

133
00:05:23,423 --> 00:05:24,858
This was Dad's.

134
00:05:24,858 --> 00:05:27,794
You're not getting
rid of this, are you?

135
00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:28,962
Didn't need it when he shot it,

136
00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:30,397
didn't need it
when he stuffed it,

137
00:05:30,397 --> 00:05:31,665
don't need it now.
Really?

138
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:33,733
It was his first
attempt at taxidermy.

139
00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:35,135
He was so proud.

140
00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:36,836
If it has sentimental
value to you,

141
00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,705
I'll let you have it
for five dollars.

142
00:05:38,705 --> 00:05:40,440
Ooh. For this nasty thing?

143
00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:42,008
(drops raccoon on table)

144
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:44,611
Oh, you're selling
his golf clubs, too?

145
00:05:44,611 --> 00:05:46,680
Which one of your
children do you see

146
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,715
hanging out with Arnold
Palmer in the future?

147
00:05:48,715 --> 00:05:51,851
Dad's clothes,
his shoes, his pipes?

148
00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:54,588
Honey, it's just stuff.

149
00:05:54,588 --> 00:05:56,156
I know, but still...

150
00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:57,857
I get how you're feeling.

151
00:05:57,857 --> 00:05:59,426
I do.

152
00:05:59,426 --> 00:06:00,594
Now go away.

153
00:06:00,594 --> 00:06:02,762
I got a lot of crap to sell.

154
00:06:02,762 --> 00:06:04,864
♪ ♪

155
00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:06,700
(George Sr. sighs)

156
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,735
All right, now,
don't wander off.

157
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:10,604
Pick you up right after
the lecture's over.

158
00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:11,838
Bye.

159
00:06:13,607 --> 00:06:15,041
You gonna be okay by yourself?

160
00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:17,744
I actually prefer it.

161
00:06:17,744 --> 00:06:20,981
Yep. I'm leaving.

162
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You keep saying that,
but then you don't do it.

163
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Bye.

164
00:06:27,787 --> 00:06:29,456
He's so needy.

165
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PAIGE:
Sheldon?

166
00:06:32,759 --> 00:06:33,760
Paige?

167
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:35,729
I'm so happy to see you.

168
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:37,030
Are you happy to see me?

169
00:06:37,030 --> 00:06:38,632
Not immediately.

170
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:39,866
That's okay.

171
00:06:39,866 --> 00:06:41,601
I'm happy enough
for both of us.

172
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SPORTSCASTER (on TV):
Rice Stadium in Houston.
Dave Barnett and Dave Rowe.

173
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:52,512
And Baylor's bidding to go up
14 to nothing.

174
00:06:52,512 --> 00:06:55,048
SPORTSCASTER 2:
And if you're Rice right now,
and you're in that huddle...

175
00:06:55,048 --> 00:06:56,750
George?
Uh...

176
00:06:57,917 --> 00:06:59,052
Hi.

177
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:00,654
Oh, Paige's mom.

178
00:07:00,654 --> 00:07:02,222
I know.
(both laughing)

179
00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:04,224
What a nice surprise.

180
00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:06,526
I just dropped Paige off
at the carbon-dating lecture.

181
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:07,894
And I dropped Sheldon.

182
00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:09,162
Well, how about that?

183
00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:11,164
How about it.
(both laugh)

184
00:07:11,164 --> 00:07:12,799
Mind if I join you?

185
00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:15,769
Sure.
Mm.

186
00:07:19,072 --> 00:07:22,642
So, uh, where's
your... your hubby?

187
00:07:22,642 --> 00:07:24,544
Oh, Barry?
Barry. Yeah.

188
00:07:24,544 --> 00:07:26,546
Who cares? (laughs)

189
00:07:26,546 --> 00:07:28,715
That doesn't sound good.

190
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:31,685
Oh, sorry. Just ignore me.

191
00:07:31,685 --> 00:07:33,687
Okay. (chuckles)

192
00:07:33,687 --> 00:07:35,121
Oh, hey, you want a wing?

193
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:37,557
Yeah, no, thank you.

194
00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:39,993
You mind if I watch the game?

195
00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:42,195
Oh, no, not at all. Enjoy.

196
00:07:43,930 --> 00:07:45,865
I'll just see
what kind of pie they have.

197
00:07:45,865 --> 00:07:47,734
Mm-hmm.

198
00:07:47,734 --> 00:07:50,737
(crying)

199
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:53,139
SPORTSCASTER: Well, we were here
last year when Arkansas...

200
00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:55,742
(crying)

201
00:07:55,742 --> 00:07:59,045
It's getting a little tougher
to ignore you. (chuckles)

202
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:01,614
Oh. I'm sorry. It's just...

203
00:08:01,614 --> 00:08:03,616
Oh... forget it. (laughs)

204
00:08:03,616 --> 00:08:05,051
Okeydoke.

205
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:08,988
Fine, I'll tell you. Barry and I
haven't been in a good place

206
00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:11,257
in a long time, and I...

207
00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:13,893
I think we're headed
for divorce.

208
00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:17,130
I'm sorry. Uh...

209
00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:19,032
I don't know what to say.

210
00:08:19,032 --> 00:08:21,034
Uh, oh. (sniffles)

211
00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:23,203
You don't have to say anything.
(laughs)

212
00:08:23,203 --> 00:08:25,171
That I can do.

213
00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:26,773
Ooh.

214
00:08:26,773 --> 00:08:29,909
(voice breaking):
They have cobbler.

215
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:33,179
SPORTSCASTER: Rupert Taylor
got the block, and Charles...

216
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:34,881
All right, everybody, welcome.

217
00:08:34,881 --> 00:08:37,317
Glad to see
we got so many people interested

218
00:08:37,317 --> 00:08:39,319
in radioactive decay.

219
00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:40,787
Well, hello.

220
00:08:40,787 --> 00:08:42,655
Hi.
Hi.
This is a nice surprise.

221
00:08:42,655 --> 00:08:45,658
I don't usually see
young people at my lectures.

222
00:08:45,658 --> 00:08:48,628
I enjoyed your paper on
accelerator mass spectrometry,

223
00:08:48,628 --> 00:08:50,163
and wanted to find out more.

224
00:08:50,163 --> 00:08:51,297
Is that so?

225
00:08:52,298 --> 00:08:53,299
And you?

226
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:55,902
I read this magazine.

227
00:08:55,902 --> 00:08:57,203
Uh-huh.

228
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:59,339
It has puzzles, too.

229
00:08:59,339 --> 00:09:01,808
Okay.

230
00:09:01,808 --> 00:09:02,942
(clears throat)

231
00:09:02,942 --> 00:09:04,778
Do you want to kick this off

232
00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,913
and tell us
exactly what carbon dating is?

233
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:10,383
The 5,730-year half-life
of carbon 14

234
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,085
is used as a geochronometer.

235
00:09:12,085 --> 00:09:14,054
Anything else you'd like to add?

236
00:09:15,955 --> 00:09:17,957
Um...

237
00:09:17,957 --> 00:09:22,061
carbon dating is how we figured
out how old my grandmother is.

238
00:09:22,061 --> 00:09:24,731
(laughter)

239
00:09:26,099 --> 00:09:28,234
ADULT SHELDON:
It was at this moment I learned

240
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,770
I was not only brilliant;
I was also hilarious.

241
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:32,205
(Adult Sheldon laughs)

242
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:38,778
(sportscaster speaking on TV)

243
00:09:38,778 --> 00:09:41,848
I mean, you, of all people,
would understand.

244
00:09:41,848 --> 00:09:43,917
You've got a special child
of your own.

245
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,985
(chuckling):
I do, I do.

246
00:09:45,985 --> 00:09:48,855
How do you and Mary
handle the stress?

247
00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:51,524
Well, we actually have
a pretty good system.

248
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:52,959
Oh, please tell me.

249
00:09:52,959 --> 00:09:55,428
We don't talk about it.

250
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:56,963
Not at all?

251
00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:58,364
Zippo.

252
00:09:58,364 --> 00:10:01,100
Boy, that doesn't sound
like it could work.

253
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:04,103
Suit yourself,
but I'm having a nice day;

254
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:07,440
you're crying
into your peach cobbler.

255
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:10,910
For now, let's neglect changes
in the isotopic

256
00:10:10,910 --> 00:10:13,546
ratio of the air
over thousands of years.

257
00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:16,583
(whispering):
This is pretty basic stuff.

258
00:10:16,583 --> 00:10:18,585
(whispering):
Yes.

259
00:10:18,585 --> 00:10:20,587
I'm bored.

260
00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:22,589
Let's get out of here.

261
00:10:22,589 --> 00:10:24,657
I can't. I told my dad

262
00:10:24,657 --> 00:10:27,026
I'd stay here until
the end of the lecture.

263
00:10:27,026 --> 00:10:30,463
Okay. Be a baby.

264
00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:32,465
I'm leaving.

265
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:34,467
In our case,
the math yields

266
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:38,638
approximately
48,000 years.

267
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,673
ADULT SHELDON:
I was most certainly
not a baby.

268
00:10:40,673 --> 00:10:42,742
If anyone was a baby,
it was she,

269
00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:44,544
because people
who call other people babies

270
00:10:44,544 --> 00:10:46,312
are the real babies.

271
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,815
(whispering):
Wait up.

272
00:10:52,886 --> 00:10:54,420
(sniffing)

273
00:10:54,420 --> 00:10:55,788
I like it.

274
00:10:55,788 --> 00:10:57,790
It likes you.

275
00:10:57,790 --> 00:10:59,826
How much?
Five dollars.

276
00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,761
I only have 50 cents.

277
00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:03,429
That's okay.
We're haggling.

278
00:11:03,429 --> 00:11:05,598
I don't know what that means.

279
00:11:05,598 --> 00:11:07,934
You make me an offer, and
we meet in the middle.

280
00:11:07,934 --> 00:11:09,936
The middle of what?

281
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:13,072
I'm not really sure.

282
00:11:15,942 --> 00:11:17,944
Hmm.

283
00:11:19,145 --> 00:11:20,813
(chuckles)

284
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,618
What are you doing?

285
00:11:25,618 --> 00:11:28,588
Considering buying this jacket.

286
00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:32,458
I found chewing tobacco
and Juicy Fruit in the pocket.

287
00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:34,928
Does that come with it,
or is it extra?

288
00:11:35,995 --> 00:11:37,997
Actually, that's not for sale.

289
00:11:37,997 --> 00:11:39,866
Why don't you look
for something else.

290
00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:41,834
You sure?
There's a price tag on it.

291
00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:43,670
Just take it off.

292
00:11:43,670 --> 00:11:46,172
Is this some kind of
bargaining technique?

293
00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:47,974
Because I should warn you.

294
00:11:47,974 --> 00:11:50,076
I've been to the
bazaars in Istanbul,

295
00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:55,148
where the negotiations are fast,
furious and bilingual.

296
00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:56,849
Just take it off, damn it.

297
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,589
What just happened?

298
00:12:03,590 --> 00:12:05,491
That's my dad's jacket.

299
00:12:05,491 --> 00:12:07,493
Oh.

300
00:12:08,494 --> 00:12:10,630
Still don't know what happened.

301
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:15,568
Do you think humans will become
extinct like the dinosaurs?

302
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:18,471
Yes, but before that happens,
some of us will merge

303
00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:20,473
with computers and
become immortal cyborgs.

304
00:12:20,473 --> 00:12:22,475
That's a fascinating idea.

305
00:12:22,475 --> 00:12:23,743
Thank you.

306
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:26,179
Did you get that
from a TV show?

307
00:12:26,179 --> 00:12:27,580
No.

308
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,883
A comic book.

309
00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:35,888
(sportscaster speaks on TV)
And then when Paige turned six,
it was obvious

310
00:12:35,888 --> 00:12:37,090
she wasn't like
the other kids,

311
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:38,992
and she needed a school
where she could excel.

312
00:12:38,992 --> 00:12:41,160
Uh-huh.
But Barry's
dental practice

313
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:43,162
was 50 miles
outside of Fayetteville,

314
00:12:43,162 --> 00:12:45,865
and do you know what's available
for extraordinary children

315
00:12:45,865 --> 00:12:48,134
50 miles outside
of Fayetteville?

316
00:12:48,134 --> 00:12:49,669
I'm gonna guess not much.
Nothing.

317
00:12:49,669 --> 00:12:50,803
Mm-hmm.

318
00:12:50,803 --> 00:12:53,640
So I packed us up, and I made
him move to Texas where,

319
00:12:53,640 --> 00:12:55,908
believe it or not,
people do get cavities.

320
00:12:55,908 --> 00:12:58,144
I believe it.
I had a humdinger last summer.

321
00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:00,680
Face swelled up
like a cantaloupe.
And do you know

322
00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,548
he's been cool to me ever since,

323
00:13:02,548 --> 00:13:04,651
even though
his practice is making money

324
00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:06,085
hand over fist.
Yeah, yeah.

325
00:13:06,085 --> 00:13:07,654
SPORTSCASTER:
A flag down...

326
00:13:07,654 --> 00:13:08,821
And as much as he
says I ignore him,

327
00:13:08,821 --> 00:13:10,523
he ignores me just as much.

328
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:12,892
I mean, would it kill him
to get a babysitter every once

329
00:13:12,892 --> 00:13:15,061
in a while and take me
to dinner, maybe a movie?

330
00:13:15,061 --> 00:13:16,062
It would not.

331
00:13:16,062 --> 00:13:18,297
Oh, darn. You didn't see me.

332
00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:22,802
Then you've got fourth down,
and he throws the...

333
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,871
BARRY:
George!

334
00:13:26,673 --> 00:13:28,808
Hey.
(chuckles)

335
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,043
Paige's dad.

336
00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:32,945
Barry. Yeah, of course,
I remember.

337
00:13:32,945 --> 00:13:34,313
What are you doing here?

338
00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:35,715
Uh, just, you know,

339
00:13:35,715 --> 00:13:37,717
Sheldon wanted to go
to a science lecture.

340
00:13:37,717 --> 00:13:38,951
No kidding.

341
00:13:38,951 --> 00:13:40,219
We just dropped Paige off there.

342
00:13:40,219 --> 00:13:42,221
You don't say. (chuckles)

343
00:13:42,221 --> 00:13:43,956
PAIGE: Ooh. (chuckles)

344
00:13:43,956 --> 00:13:45,725
Caveman stuff.
I love that.

345
00:13:45,725 --> 00:13:47,827
Where are you going?
It's closed.

346
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:51,197
I can read... baby.

347
00:13:52,932 --> 00:13:55,668
Just so you know,
that won't work every time.

348
00:13:57,270 --> 00:13:59,238
You haven't, uh,
seen Linda around, have you?

349
00:13:59,238 --> 00:14:00,840
Linda.

350
00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:03,609
Your wife, Linda.

351
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:05,311
(laughing):
Yeah. No.

352
00:14:05,311 --> 00:14:07,113
So what's new?

353
00:14:07,113 --> 00:14:08,781
Oh, not much.

354
00:14:08,781 --> 00:14:09,782
Hey, you like football?

355
00:14:09,782 --> 00:14:11,150
No.

356
00:14:11,150 --> 00:14:13,052
Well, you sure?
It's a close game.

357
00:14:13,052 --> 00:14:17,957
Uh, no, no, I'm, uh,
more of a tennis man.

358
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:20,927
Well, those are two very
different sports, aren't they?

359
00:14:20,927 --> 00:14:22,762
SPORTSCASTER:
I think you've got to go outside

360
00:14:22,762 --> 00:14:24,330
and rely on somebody like...

361
00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:28,835
George... can I confide in you?

362
00:14:33,906 --> 00:14:42,448
♪ ♪

363
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:46,586
This is oddly reminiscent
of a dinner with my family.

364
00:14:46,586 --> 00:14:47,487
You're funny.

365
00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:49,288
I know.

366
00:14:49,288 --> 00:14:51,357
My family never
eats dinner together.

367
00:14:51,357 --> 00:14:53,192
Why not?

368
00:14:53,192 --> 00:14:56,329
My dad always manages to come
home from work after we're done.

369
00:14:56,329 --> 00:15:00,199
Hmm. My dad never
misses a meal.

370
00:15:00,199 --> 00:15:03,336
Do you think Stone Age parents
stayed together forever?

371
00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:05,605
They had to.
There were no lawyers.

372
00:15:05,605 --> 00:15:07,039
(laughs)
What?

373
00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:08,341
That was funny.

374
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:11,077
Right, we've
established I'm funny.

375
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:13,246
Well, I think my parents
are getting a divorce.

376
00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:14,514
Why?

377
00:15:14,514 --> 00:15:16,048
They fight all the time.

378
00:15:16,048 --> 00:15:18,184
About what?
Mostly me.

379
00:15:19,218 --> 00:15:21,087
Hmm. That's too bad.

380
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,089
I guess I'm lucky.

381
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:24,056
Why?

382
00:15:24,056 --> 00:15:26,225
I'm the glue that holds
our family together.

383
00:15:26,225 --> 00:15:27,994
(knocking)

384
00:15:27,994 --> 00:15:29,962
What are you kids
doing in there?

385
00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:36,235
Okay, ten cents a week
for a whole year.

386
00:15:36,235 --> 00:15:39,772
I get the raccoon, and to tell
people you're my girlfriend.

387
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:43,075
15 cents a week, and if you
say hello to me in school,

388
00:15:43,075 --> 00:15:44,377
I'll say hello back.

389
00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:46,379
Deal.

390
00:15:48,114 --> 00:15:51,551
Connie, I need to apologize.

391
00:15:51,551 --> 00:15:54,253
Oh, that's okay.
Don't worry about it.

392
00:15:54,253 --> 00:15:56,289
No, I am worrying about it.

393
00:15:56,289 --> 00:16:00,026
I didn't realize that with you
and I being in a relationship,

394
00:16:00,026 --> 00:16:02,128
me wearing
your dead husband's clothes

395
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:05,298
would be emotionally
challenging for you.

396
00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:07,800
All right, apology accepted.

397
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,402
Thank you.

398
00:16:13,272 --> 00:16:15,274
Are you okay?

399
00:16:18,277 --> 00:16:22,582
I guess I just didn't expect
that getting rid of my...

400
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:26,419
my husband's stuff
was gonna hit me so hard.

401
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:31,724
He must have been
a wonderful man.

402
00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:33,659
(laughs)

403
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,294
Well, he had his moments.

404
00:16:35,294 --> 00:16:40,600
He was married to a wonderful
woman, so that says a lot.

405
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,702
You're pretty
wonderful yourself.

406
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:46,172
Thank you.

407
00:16:46,172 --> 00:16:50,309
Now, let's talk
about this hula girl lamp.

408
00:16:50,309 --> 00:16:52,445
What's your best price?

409
00:16:52,445 --> 00:16:54,614
It's my gift to you.

410
00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:56,182
Nice haggle.

411
00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:58,451
Nice mullet.

412
00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:00,753
Thanks again.

413
00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:03,489
Real sorry
about this.

414
00:17:03,489 --> 00:17:05,491
What were you
thinking?

415
00:17:05,491 --> 00:17:06,692
I got bored.

416
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:08,094
'Cause you're a baby.

417
00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:09,095
LINDA:
What happened?

418
00:17:09,095 --> 00:17:10,363
BARRY:
Everything's fine.

419
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:12,131
They just
wandered off.

420
00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:14,100
Hey, Linda, nice to see you.

421
00:17:15,101 --> 00:17:16,502
George, Sheldon's dad.

422
00:17:16,502 --> 00:17:18,671
Oh, sure, yes. Hi.

423
00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:22,375
Well, good to see you folks.

424
00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,110
Take care.

425
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:30,116
Did you know that her parents
are getting a divorce?

426
00:17:30,116 --> 00:17:32,218
Just keep walking.
Keep walking.

427
00:17:37,156 --> 00:17:39,525
(laughing):
What... what is that for?

428
00:17:39,525 --> 00:17:41,394
Well, can't I
appreciate my wife?

429
00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:43,396
What did you do now?

430
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,564
I didn't do anything.

431
00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:46,632
Want to hear something cool?

432
00:17:46,632 --> 00:17:49,135
Sheldon skipped out
of that lecture

433
00:17:49,135 --> 00:17:51,804
with that little Paige girl,
snuck into a closed exhibit.

434
00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:54,173
You're kidding.
True. (laughs)

435
00:17:54,173 --> 00:17:57,543
Even got, uh, "arrested"
by the museum security cops.

436
00:17:57,543 --> 00:17:59,412
Why would you think that's cool?

437
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:01,414
Sheldon got into trouble
with a girl!

438
00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:03,449
I'm bursting with pride.

439
00:18:03,449 --> 00:18:04,850
(sighs)

440
00:18:04,850 --> 00:18:07,553
You know what? I don't
want to talk about it.

441
00:18:07,553 --> 00:18:10,423
There, right there.

442
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,425
That's why I love you.

443
00:18:19,565 --> 00:18:21,334
You gonna eat
your beans?

444
00:18:21,334 --> 00:18:23,636
Yeah, I'm gonna
eat my beans. Duh.

445
00:18:23,636 --> 00:18:25,171
What about your tots?

446
00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:26,606
Those, too.
Georgie!

447
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:27,840
Just eat your
own dinner.

448
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:29,208
Dad?

449
00:18:29,208 --> 00:18:30,476
Can't have my
tots, either!

450
00:18:30,476 --> 00:18:33,179
(grunting)

451
00:18:33,179 --> 00:18:35,581
(George Sr. grunts)

452
00:18:35,581 --> 00:18:37,216
(all grunting)

453
00:18:38,517 --> 00:18:40,720
(bird screeches,
grunting continues)