WEBVTT 1 00:00:03,351 --> 00:00:05,701 Mm-hmm. I'll tell him. 2 00:00:05,744 --> 00:00:09,313 Sheldon, you need to go to the principal's office. 3 00:00:09,357 --> 00:00:11,228 STUDENTS: Ooh... 4 00:00:11,272 --> 00:00:13,317 You do that every time. 5 00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:15,015 Why? 6 00:00:15,058 --> 00:00:17,669 Uh-huh. Okay. I'll be right there. 7 00:00:19,062 --> 00:00:20,803 What's up? 8 00:00:20,846 --> 00:00:22,761 Principal wants to talk to me. 9 00:00:22,805 --> 00:00:24,502 Ooh... 10 00:00:24,546 --> 00:00:25,982 Grow up. 11 00:00:29,246 --> 00:00:30,334 Hello! 12 00:00:30,378 --> 00:00:31,509 Oh. 13 00:00:31,553 --> 00:00:33,250 What are you doing here? 14 00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:35,470 I got called to the principal's office. 15 00:00:35,513 --> 00:00:37,559 So did I. 16 00:00:37,602 --> 00:00:39,474 [grunts] 17 00:00:39,517 --> 00:00:41,476 What, you do something wrong? 18 00:00:41,519 --> 00:00:43,347 Not that I'm aware of. 19 00:00:43,391 --> 00:00:45,045 Did you? 20 00:00:46,568 --> 00:00:47,960 I hope not. 21 00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:52,095 Maybe it's good news. 22 00:00:52,139 --> 00:00:54,358 [scoffs] Sheldon, you ever been called to the principal's office 23 00:00:54,402 --> 00:00:55,359 for good news? 24 00:00:55,403 --> 00:00:57,361 Never. Mm. 25 00:00:57,405 --> 00:00:59,146 Gentlemen, good news. 26 00:00:59,189 --> 00:01:01,757 I had a feeling. What's up? 27 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:04,586 We got the PSAT results back, and Sheldon 28 00:01:04,629 --> 00:01:07,110 got a perfect score. 29 00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:09,025 Neat.Thanks, Tom. 30 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,722 I'll be sure to put that up on the fridge. 31 00:01:10,766 --> 00:01:12,202 No, you don't understand. 32 00:01:12,246 --> 00:01:14,813 Sheldon's the only kid in the school to ever do this. 33 00:01:14,857 --> 00:01:16,641 At his age, maybe in the whole country. 34 00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:18,469 It was fun. I enjoyed it. 35 00:01:18,513 --> 00:01:20,123 So what's this mean? 36 00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:22,734 It means he pitched a perfect game, George. 37 00:01:22,778 --> 00:01:25,346 I've already gotten calls from colleges who want to meet him. 38 00:01:25,389 --> 00:01:27,261 For, like, scholarships and stuff? 39 00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:28,523 For everything! 40 00:01:28,566 --> 00:01:30,264 They might even pay you to get him. 41 00:01:30,307 --> 00:01:32,614 [laughs] My man! 42 00:01:32,657 --> 00:01:35,356 When was the last time you washed your hands? 43 00:01:35,399 --> 00:01:37,401 Come on! 44 00:01:38,663 --> 00:01:41,579 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 45 00:01:41,623 --> 00:01:44,626 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain 46 00:01:44,669 --> 00:01:47,150 ♪ I bet I could be your hero 47 00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:49,544 ♪ I am a mighty little man 48 00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:53,591 ♪ I am a mighty little man.♪ 49 00:01:56,725 --> 00:01:58,509 GEORGE SR.: Can you believe it? 50 00:01:58,553 --> 00:01:59,989 Perfect score. 51 00:02:00,032 --> 00:02:02,600 [chuckles] Good job, moon pie. 52 00:02:02,644 --> 00:02:04,080 And not just that. 53 00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:05,777 Colleges are already sniffing around to recruit him. 54 00:02:05,821 --> 00:02:07,692 What do you mean, colleges? He's ten. 55 00:02:07,736 --> 00:02:09,433 Principal Petersen said Caltech is interested. 56 00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:11,522 Where's Caltech? 57 00:02:11,566 --> 00:02:13,220 California, Mom. 58 00:02:13,263 --> 00:02:14,525 California?! 59 00:02:14,569 --> 00:02:16,266 It has "Cal" right there in the name. 60 00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:17,702 You're not a part of this conversation. 61 00:02:19,182 --> 00:02:20,792 The "tech" is for "technology." 62 00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:23,969 Shelly, go to your room. The adults need to talk. 63 00:02:24,013 --> 00:02:26,885 Given the events of the day, I would argue I aman adult 64 00:02:26,929 --> 00:02:29,105 and should be treated as one. 65 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,499 I probably could've said that differently. 66 00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:38,462 You honestly think that little boy's ready for college? 67 00:02:38,506 --> 00:02:40,595 Hey, I didn't think he was ready for high school, 68 00:02:40,638 --> 00:02:42,423 but here we are, a year and a half in, 69 00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:43,511 and no one got hurt. 70 00:02:43,554 --> 00:02:44,642 That is different. 71 00:02:44,686 --> 00:02:46,296 He's got you and Georgie over there, 72 00:02:46,340 --> 00:02:49,691 and he's still living at home with his mother and his sister. 73 00:02:49,734 --> 00:02:50,561 And me. 74 00:02:50,605 --> 00:02:51,649 Sure. 75 00:02:51,693 --> 00:02:52,868 I understand all that. 76 00:02:52,911 --> 00:02:54,826 Then why are you pushing so hard for this? 77 00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:57,873 Because these schools are interested now. 78 00:02:57,916 --> 00:02:59,135 It's like football recruitment. 79 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:00,832 You got to strike while the iron's hot. 80 00:03:00,876 --> 00:03:03,226 This is nothing like football. 81 00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,054 Oh, yeah? What if he stops being smart 82 00:03:05,097 --> 00:03:06,664 and they don't want him anymore? 83 00:03:06,708 --> 00:03:08,536 How is that gonna happen? 84 00:03:08,579 --> 00:03:11,191 I don't know. Conks his head? 85 00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:13,758 Will you help me, please? 86 00:03:13,802 --> 00:03:16,631 Sorry, I'm not a part of this conversation. 87 00:03:20,548 --> 00:03:22,767 At least Dad's on my side. 88 00:03:22,811 --> 00:03:24,421 Doesn't matter. Mom's gonna win. 89 00:03:24,465 --> 00:03:25,683 She always does. 90 00:03:25,727 --> 00:03:27,859 But I have to leave for college at some point. 91 00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:29,992 If you went to college, you know what would happen? 92 00:03:30,035 --> 00:03:31,646 I'd enjoy higher learning? 93 00:03:31,689 --> 00:03:32,777 You would die. 94 00:03:32,821 --> 00:03:34,997 You would curl up on the floor and die. 95 00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:36,303 That's not true. 96 00:03:36,346 --> 00:03:38,261 You can't even take care of your own boo-boos. 97 00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:40,089 For your information, every college is staffed 98 00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:41,482 with a medical professional. 99 00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:44,006 My boo-boos will be well-tended to. 100 00:03:44,049 --> 00:03:46,008 MARY: Sheldon! Come back in here! 101 00:03:46,051 --> 00:03:48,097 I guess we'll find out what happened. 102 00:03:48,140 --> 00:03:50,969 I already know what happened. Mom won. 103 00:03:51,013 --> 00:03:53,233 Well? 104 00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:57,280 Shelly, I am very proud of you for doing so well on that test. 105 00:03:57,324 --> 00:03:59,674 But you can't go off to college. 106 00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:01,763 Mom!In a few years, sure. 107 00:04:01,806 --> 00:04:03,678 But, right now, you can just keep taking 108 00:04:03,721 --> 00:04:06,289 your one college class with Dr. Sturgis. 109 00:04:06,333 --> 00:04:09,249 Why can't I go therefull-time? 110 00:04:09,292 --> 00:04:11,686 Oh, baby, it's an hour away. 111 00:04:11,729 --> 00:04:13,775 We can't drive you back and forth every day. 112 00:04:13,818 --> 00:04:15,646 I'm the one who's been driving him. 113 00:04:15,690 --> 00:04:16,908 And she loves it. 114 00:04:16,952 --> 00:04:18,649 How can he be so smart 115 00:04:18,693 --> 00:04:21,696 and so clueless at the same time? 116 00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:25,352 Dr. Sturgis lives at the school. What if he acted as my guardian? 117 00:04:25,395 --> 00:04:26,527 That's an idea. 118 00:04:26,570 --> 00:04:28,093 A crazy one. 119 00:04:28,137 --> 00:04:30,095 But it would only be on school nights. 120 00:04:30,139 --> 00:04:32,489 Shelly.What's the point of being intelligent 121 00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:35,840 if I can't take advantage of opportunities like this? 122 00:04:39,583 --> 00:04:41,150 They're still discussing. 123 00:04:41,193 --> 00:04:43,152 Mom didn't win? 124 00:04:43,195 --> 00:04:44,806 It's touch and go. 125 00:04:44,849 --> 00:04:46,373 Crazy. 126 00:04:46,416 --> 00:04:48,940 [sighs] Is staying with John really that crazy? 127 00:04:48,984 --> 00:04:51,334 [chuckles]: Yes. He doesn't know squat about kids. 128 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:52,814 Why are you even considering this? 129 00:04:52,857 --> 00:04:55,643 Well, the Lord gave Shelly these abilities, 130 00:04:55,686 --> 00:04:58,254 and I don't want to be the one holding him back. 131 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,038 Okay. I'll ask him. 132 00:05:00,082 --> 00:05:03,346 But I'm pretty sure I know what answer you're gonna get. 133 00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:05,479 Sure! What the heck? 134 00:05:10,745 --> 00:05:12,312 Do you really think you could handle 135 00:05:12,355 --> 00:05:13,487 living with a ten-year-old? 136 00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:15,402 Oh, he's only biologically ten. 137 00:05:15,445 --> 00:05:18,361 In every other way, he's as old as I am. 138 00:05:18,405 --> 00:05:19,710 John, I don't think you realize 139 00:05:19,754 --> 00:05:21,408 the responsibility involved here. 140 00:05:21,451 --> 00:05:23,410 Well, why don't we have a trial run? 141 00:05:23,453 --> 00:05:26,891 Have him spend a couple days with me and see how it goes. 142 00:05:26,935 --> 00:05:29,633 A trial run, huh? 143 00:05:29,677 --> 00:05:31,243 Like the space program. 144 00:05:31,287 --> 00:05:32,680 You don't send people up 145 00:05:32,723 --> 00:05:34,769 right away; you start by 146 00:05:34,812 --> 00:05:37,859 spinning them around in that thing that makes them throw up. 147 00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:39,687 I don't know. 148 00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:42,472 Connie, despite appearances, 149 00:05:42,516 --> 00:05:46,911 I'm not some stereotypical absentminded professor 150 00:05:46,955 --> 00:05:49,174 who can't take care of a houseplant. 151 00:05:49,218 --> 00:05:50,437 No, no, I wasn't saying that. 152 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,439 Yeah, maybe I was. 153 00:05:52,482 --> 00:05:54,354 Here's an idea. 154 00:05:54,397 --> 00:05:57,226 Why don't you and Sheldon come live with me? 155 00:05:57,269 --> 00:05:59,620 And then you can take care of both of us. 156 00:05:59,663 --> 00:06:02,797 Trial run sounds like the way to go. 157 00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:05,147 Not ready to shack up, are you? 158 00:06:05,190 --> 00:06:06,757 No.Darn it. 159 00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:10,544 The Earth is about 4.5 billion years old. 160 00:06:10,587 --> 00:06:13,242 In the Cosmic Calendar, it's...Shelly, 161 00:06:13,285 --> 00:06:14,461 we need to talk to you. 162 00:06:14,504 --> 00:06:15,636 All right. 163 00:06:15,679 --> 00:06:16,898 [TV shuts off] 164 00:06:16,941 --> 00:06:19,901 Meemaw spoke to Dr. Sturgis... 165 00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:20,684 And? 166 00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:22,338 And... 167 00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,558 he was open to you staying. 168 00:06:24,601 --> 00:06:26,124 Yes! When can I go? 169 00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:27,778 Now, hold on. Before you get ahead of yourself, 170 00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:29,432 this is just a trial run, for one night. 171 00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:31,129 And even if it goes well, 172 00:06:31,173 --> 00:06:32,653 you're not starting college tomorrow. 173 00:06:32,696 --> 00:06:36,004 It's just to see if this is an option for the future. 174 00:06:36,047 --> 00:06:37,005 GEORGE SR.: You understand? 175 00:06:37,048 --> 00:06:38,354 Yes. 176 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,747 [guitar version of Tetristheme playing] 177 00:06:39,790 --> 00:06:41,444 ADULT SHELDON: The prospect of advancing 178 00:06:41,488 --> 00:06:44,404 to the next stage of academia had me feeling giddy. 179 00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:47,581 And, on top of that, I got to pack a suitcase, 180 00:06:47,624 --> 00:06:49,670 which is like playingTetris but with underwear. 181 00:06:49,713 --> 00:06:51,715 [beeping] 182 00:06:53,978 --> 00:06:54,979 [beeping] 183 00:06:57,591 --> 00:06:59,854 [beeping] 184 00:07:02,030 --> 00:07:03,901 [beeping continues] 185 00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,999 You know, Shelly, it's okay if you're a little nervous. 186 00:07:15,043 --> 00:07:16,174 You can tell me. 187 00:07:16,218 --> 00:07:17,567 I'm not nervous. 188 00:07:17,611 --> 00:07:18,786 All right. 189 00:07:19,830 --> 00:07:21,963 When I was your age, a lot of times, 190 00:07:22,006 --> 00:07:23,834 I'd have to spend the weekend with my grandparents, 191 00:07:23,878 --> 00:07:25,488 and that always frightened me, 192 00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:27,447 'cause they'd leave their teeth all over the place. 193 00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:31,233 I never told anybody, but I wish I had. 194 00:07:31,276 --> 00:07:34,279 That does sound upsetting. Good thing I'm braver than you. 195 00:07:34,323 --> 00:07:36,586 I'm just saying, it can be tough 196 00:07:36,630 --> 00:07:39,459 sleeping in a new place without your mom. 197 00:07:39,502 --> 00:07:41,591 Dr. Sturgis will be there. He's like a mom. 198 00:07:42,636 --> 00:07:44,594 But he's really smart. 199 00:07:47,771 --> 00:07:49,338 Welcome! 200 00:07:49,381 --> 00:07:51,645 Come in, come in! 201 00:07:53,342 --> 00:07:55,518 You like chalkboards, huh? 202 00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:56,911 Indeed, I do.Huh. 203 00:07:56,954 --> 00:07:59,522 In fact, I even have one in the bathroom. 204 00:07:59,566 --> 00:08:02,307 You never know when inspiration will strike. 205 00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:05,049 I may be the luckiest boy in East Texas. 206 00:08:05,093 --> 00:08:06,486 I know it's Thursday, 207 00:08:06,529 --> 00:08:09,532 so dinner will be spaghetti and hot dogs. 208 00:08:09,576 --> 00:08:11,012 And, for fun, 209 00:08:11,055 --> 00:08:14,581 I have a few episodes of Cosmosrecorded. 210 00:08:14,624 --> 00:08:17,322 Forget "maybe." I amthe luckiest boy. 211 00:08:17,366 --> 00:08:20,587 Remember, it's a school night, so his bedtime is 7:30. 212 00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:22,502 [gasps] Mine, too! 213 00:08:24,155 --> 00:08:26,549 ["So Far Away" by Carole King playing over radio] 214 00:08:26,593 --> 00:08:30,422 ♪ So far away 215 00:08:30,466 --> 00:08:35,384 ♪ Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore? ♪ 216 00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:37,517 [music stops]Shut up, Carole King. 217 00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:39,867 ♪ 218 00:08:39,910 --> 00:08:42,565 Watching Cosmoswhile we're eating dinner? 219 00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:45,133 Am I awake? Because this feels like a dream. 220 00:08:45,176 --> 00:08:47,483 Oh, not for me. In my dreams, 221 00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:51,748 I'm usually running for my life from a giant praying mantis. 222 00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:53,271 That's the insect 223 00:08:53,315 --> 00:08:55,404 where the female eats the male after mating? 224 00:08:55,447 --> 00:08:56,623 It is. 225 00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:59,234 I think I understand why you're not married. 226 00:09:01,715 --> 00:09:04,065 This little piggy's looking good. 227 00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:05,936 Hey, baby. 228 00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:07,721 Hey.Need any help? 229 00:09:07,764 --> 00:09:09,679 No. 230 00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:11,463 Do you want to do mine next? 231 00:09:11,507 --> 00:09:13,074 Why? 232 00:09:13,117 --> 00:09:16,120 Well, just seems like a thing mothers and daughters might do. 233 00:09:17,121 --> 00:09:19,559 What's wrong with you? 234 00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:21,648 Nothing. 235 00:09:21,691 --> 00:09:23,563 Never mind. 236 00:09:25,608 --> 00:09:27,871 Georgie, what you up to? 237 00:09:27,915 --> 00:09:29,960 CARL SAGAN: All my life, 238 00:09:30,004 --> 00:09:33,660 I've wondered about life beyond the Earth. 239 00:09:33,703 --> 00:09:37,577 On those countless other planets that we think circle other suns, 240 00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:40,623 is there also life? 241 00:09:40,667 --> 00:09:42,712 Might the beings of other worlds resemble us, 242 00:09:42,756 --> 00:09:45,672 or would they be astonishingly different? 243 00:09:45,715 --> 00:09:46,977 Do you believe there's 244 00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:48,588 intelligent life in the universe? 245 00:09:48,631 --> 00:09:50,111 I have no doubt. 246 00:09:50,154 --> 00:09:51,591 Why is that? 247 00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:54,594 The Drake Equation claims that there are at least 248 00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:59,599 20 detectable civilizations in our Milky Way galaxy alone. 249 00:09:59,642 --> 00:10:01,339 Interesting. 250 00:10:01,383 --> 00:10:03,907 My sister likes to say that I'm an alien. 251 00:10:03,951 --> 00:10:06,606 I've often been called that. 252 00:10:06,649 --> 00:10:09,739 Once by the praying mantis in my dream. 253 00:10:09,783 --> 00:10:12,394 Maybe we arealiens. 254 00:10:12,437 --> 00:10:14,178 Perhaps. 255 00:10:14,222 --> 00:10:16,703 Or maybe people like you and me 256 00:10:16,746 --> 00:10:18,661 were the original inhabitants of Earth, 257 00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:21,708 and everyone else is from outer space. 258 00:10:21,751 --> 00:10:23,448 Ooh, I like that better. 259 00:10:23,492 --> 00:10:26,669 SAGAN: In the great dark between the stars, there also are... 260 00:10:26,713 --> 00:10:28,715 After dinner, want to toast marshmallows 261 00:10:28,758 --> 00:10:30,151 on a Bunsen burner? 262 00:10:30,194 --> 00:10:31,543 Good gosh, yes. 263 00:10:31,587 --> 00:10:33,633 Good morning, everybody. Good morning. 264 00:10:33,676 --> 00:10:35,156 Angela, look, you know, 265 00:10:35,199 --> 00:10:37,680 I wanted to jot down some household hints, you know... 266 00:10:37,724 --> 00:10:39,987 Want to go out and get some ice cream? 267 00:10:40,030 --> 00:10:41,292 I'm watching this. 268 00:10:41,336 --> 00:10:43,555 Well, when it's over. 269 00:10:43,599 --> 00:10:45,732 Not really. 270 00:10:45,775 --> 00:10:48,299 Okay. 271 00:10:48,343 --> 00:10:51,825 Want to play Monopoly? I'll let you be the thimble. 272 00:10:51,868 --> 00:10:53,827 And then he said, "Boy, what a mess. 273 00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:55,655 How about cleaning this up, huh?" 274 00:10:55,698 --> 00:10:57,918 Well, pooh to you. 275 00:10:57,961 --> 00:10:59,920 [laughter over TV] 276 00:10:59,963 --> 00:11:01,704 Oh, yeah. 277 00:11:01,748 --> 00:11:03,314 What about the little dog? 278 00:11:03,358 --> 00:11:04,968 Nope. 279 00:11:05,012 --> 00:11:08,450 Finally, we strike the flint 280 00:11:08,493 --> 00:11:11,714 while turning up the gas of the Bunsen burner. 281 00:11:11,758 --> 00:11:14,325 I don't say this often, but that may have been 282 00:11:14,369 --> 00:11:15,849 the perfect safety lecture. 283 00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:17,459 Thank you. 284 00:11:17,502 --> 00:11:20,331 You're my guest. After you. 285 00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:23,987 This is like being around a campfire, 286 00:11:24,031 --> 00:11:25,641 only I'm not miserable. 287 00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:28,557 Would you like me to sing a cowboy song 288 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:30,777 while we sit around our makeshift campfire? 289 00:11:30,820 --> 00:11:32,866 I would like that. 290 00:11:32,909 --> 00:11:35,869 ♪ Oh, pity the cowboy 291 00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:38,610 ♪ All bloody and red 292 00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:41,135 ♪ For the bronco fell on him 293 00:11:41,178 --> 00:11:43,964 ♪ And bashed in his head 294 00:11:44,007 --> 00:11:47,097 ♪ There was blood on the saddle ♪ 295 00:11:47,141 --> 00:11:49,752 ♪ And blood all around 296 00:11:49,796 --> 00:11:52,799 ♪ And a great big puddle of blood ♪ 297 00:11:52,842 --> 00:11:55,149 ♪ On the ground. 298 00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:59,414 [cheering, applause over TV] 299 00:11:59,457 --> 00:12:00,676 CONTESTANT: "N." 300 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,722 PAT SAJAK: And there are two "N"s. 301 00:12:02,765 --> 00:12:03,723 CONTESTANT: All right. 302 00:12:03,766 --> 00:12:05,899 You want to go bowl a few frames? 303 00:12:05,942 --> 00:12:08,771 Don't you see me watching the Wheel? 304 00:12:08,815 --> 00:12:10,512 You can just say "no." 305 00:12:10,555 --> 00:12:12,166 No. 306 00:12:14,211 --> 00:12:15,996 Have you talked to John tonight? 307 00:12:16,039 --> 00:12:17,737 Yeah.And? 308 00:12:17,780 --> 00:12:21,871 He and Sheldon were watching TV without anybody yakking at 'em. 309 00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:27,747 I'm going home. 310 00:12:30,053 --> 00:12:32,447 Thanks for stopping by. 311 00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:36,016 Buy a vowel. Buy a vowel. 312 00:12:38,366 --> 00:12:41,456 If you like being tucked in, I'm prepared to do it. 313 00:12:41,499 --> 00:12:43,806 I practiced on a watermelon. 314 00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:45,982 That's okay. I'm a self-tucker. 315 00:12:46,026 --> 00:12:49,812 Very well. Now, I'll be in my room if you need me. 316 00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:51,292 Here's a glass of water 317 00:12:51,335 --> 00:12:52,467 if you get thirsty. 318 00:12:52,510 --> 00:12:54,382 And there's fresh chalk on the blackboard 319 00:12:54,425 --> 00:12:56,906 in case of any late-night epiphanies. 320 00:12:56,950 --> 00:12:58,908 Excellent. 321 00:12:58,952 --> 00:13:02,825 Oh, and, uh... if your meemaw asks 322 00:13:02,869 --> 00:13:04,131 how I did tonight, 323 00:13:04,174 --> 00:13:06,611 I hope you'll give me a positive review. 324 00:13:06,655 --> 00:13:07,917 Three stars. 325 00:13:07,961 --> 00:13:09,919 Out of three?Yes. 326 00:13:09,963 --> 00:13:11,442 Wonderful! 327 00:13:16,708 --> 00:13:18,449 Hi. 328 00:13:18,493 --> 00:13:20,756 What do you want?I baked you a pie. 329 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:21,931 Why? 330 00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:23,846 Well, I was thinking we haven't had 331 00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:25,630 the best history as neighbors. 332 00:13:25,674 --> 00:13:27,894 That's 'cause we don't like each other. 333 00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:31,375 Right, so I thought we could sit down over a slice of rhubarb pie 334 00:13:31,419 --> 00:13:33,900 and, you know, forgive and forget. 335 00:13:33,943 --> 00:13:36,816 I haven't done anything that needs forgiving. 336 00:13:36,859 --> 00:13:40,602 Okay, well, that sounds like something 337 00:13:40,645 --> 00:13:43,170 we could sit down and talk about over the pie. 338 00:13:43,213 --> 00:13:45,215 BILLY [in distance]: Mom, I'm bleeding again! 339 00:13:45,259 --> 00:13:48,436 You know what, Mary? I appreciate it, 340 00:13:48,479 --> 00:13:49,698 but this isn't a great time. 341 00:13:49,741 --> 00:13:51,831 Bobbi stabbed Billy in the leg with a fork. 342 00:13:51,874 --> 00:13:53,397 Good Lord. Is he okay? 343 00:13:53,441 --> 00:13:56,792 It was a plastic fork, but it broke the skin pretty good. 344 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,925 Oh, okay, I-I understand. 345 00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:00,665 How about I take that pie and give you a rain check? 346 00:14:00,709 --> 00:14:02,102 Um, sure... 347 00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:04,495 BILLY: I think there's mustard in the fork holes! 348 00:14:04,539 --> 00:14:05,888 Got to go. 349 00:14:05,932 --> 00:14:07,498 You can keep the pan! 350 00:14:13,461 --> 00:14:16,246 [echoing]: Sheldon. 351 00:14:16,290 --> 00:14:19,032 Why are you running? 352 00:14:19,075 --> 00:14:21,686 I just want to kiss you. 353 00:14:21,730 --> 00:14:22,774 [screams] 354 00:14:22,818 --> 00:14:24,864 Oh, dear. Oh, dear. 355 00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:32,915 Dr. Sturgis? 356 00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:34,525 Oh, Sheldon. 357 00:14:34,569 --> 00:14:36,440 So nice to see you. 358 00:14:36,484 --> 00:14:38,181 I think you tripped and hit your head. 359 00:14:38,225 --> 00:14:40,009 I'm a bit woozy. 360 00:14:40,053 --> 00:14:41,619 I better test for concussion. 361 00:14:41,663 --> 00:14:43,012 What's your name? 362 00:14:43,056 --> 00:14:44,622 John Burgess Sturgis. 363 00:14:44,666 --> 00:14:47,364 Burgess Sturgis? Great name.Thank you. 364 00:14:47,408 --> 00:14:49,976 Who's the president of the United States? 365 00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:52,239 George Herbert Walker Bush. 366 00:14:52,282 --> 00:14:53,936 I like Burgess Sturgis better. 367 00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:55,895 'Cause it rhymes, sure. 368 00:14:55,938 --> 00:14:58,288 Last question. What is the only fermion 369 00:14:58,332 --> 00:15:00,290 that may not have an antiparticle? 370 00:15:00,334 --> 00:15:02,075 The neutrino, of course. 371 00:15:02,118 --> 00:15:03,598 I'm gonna rule out concussion. 372 00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:05,992 To be fair, it was an easy question. 373 00:15:06,035 --> 00:15:09,169 True. Wait here. I'm going to go get some ice for your head 374 00:15:09,212 --> 00:15:11,301 and I'll fix you a hot beverage. 375 00:15:11,345 --> 00:15:16,089 Oh. There's a, there's an Earl Grey tea bag in the sink. 376 00:15:16,132 --> 00:15:18,700 I think it still has some oomph in it. 377 00:15:18,743 --> 00:15:20,745 [indistinct chatter over TV] 378 00:15:23,792 --> 00:15:26,012 Hey, what you doing? 379 00:15:26,055 --> 00:15:28,318 Pretty much what it looks like. 380 00:15:28,362 --> 00:15:30,190 Would you like some company? 381 00:15:30,233 --> 00:15:32,627 Sure, I guess. 382 00:15:32,670 --> 00:15:34,934 Of course, if you'd rather watch TV, I could leave you alone. 383 00:15:34,977 --> 00:15:37,197 Oh, no, no. No, it's a rerun. 384 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,155 But even if it weren't... 385 00:15:39,199 --> 00:15:41,201 Ooh. 386 00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:49,122 [crying] 387 00:15:49,165 --> 00:15:51,254 Hey, what... what's wrong? 388 00:15:51,298 --> 00:15:54,736 Nothing. Keep going. [laughs] 389 00:15:54,779 --> 00:15:57,695 [crying] 390 00:15:57,739 --> 00:15:59,306 Mary? 391 00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:03,353 George, I just miss my little boy so much, 392 00:16:03,397 --> 00:16:07,227 and he's never gonna come back 'cause he doesn't need his mama. 393 00:16:07,270 --> 00:16:09,185 [chuckles]: Oh, baby, of course he'll come back. 394 00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:13,276 No, you should've seen how happy he was. 395 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:17,367 All right, well, still got Georgie and Missy. 396 00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:20,544 [crying loudly] 397 00:16:24,113 --> 00:16:25,897 Uh, oh, dear. 398 00:16:25,941 --> 00:16:27,464 [grunting] 399 00:16:27,508 --> 00:16:30,467 Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear. 400 00:16:30,511 --> 00:16:31,729 Oh, dear. 401 00:16:31,773 --> 00:16:33,470 [teakettle whistling] 402 00:16:33,514 --> 00:16:36,734 Dr. Sturgis, your tea is on fire! 403 00:16:36,778 --> 00:16:41,304 [siren wailing, fire truck horn honks] 404 00:16:41,348 --> 00:16:44,133 Boy, it's a good thing we did this trial run. 405 00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:46,570 No kidding. Ooh, it's chilly out. 406 00:16:57,973 --> 00:16:59,670 Night. 407 00:17:02,238 --> 00:17:03,805 I changed my mind. 408 00:17:03,848 --> 00:17:05,807 I don't want to leave here ever. 409 00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:08,201 You never have to. 410 00:17:08,244 --> 00:17:11,769 What were you thinking, letting me take care of a child? 411 00:17:11,813 --> 00:17:13,206 I won't make that mistake again. 412 00:17:13,249 --> 00:17:16,296 Do I look like Mary Poppins? 413 00:17:16,339 --> 00:17:18,037 As smart as I am, 414 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:21,431 I tried to put out a fire with oxygen and paper. 415 00:17:21,475 --> 00:17:23,999 It's okay. No one got hurt. 416 00:17:25,783 --> 00:17:28,743 I may actually have had a concussion. 417 00:17:28,786 --> 00:17:29,918 What are your symptoms? 418 00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:34,705 It feels like there's hair on my head. 419 00:17:35,924 --> 00:17:37,752 [chuckles] 420 00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:40,668 [sighs] 421 00:17:40,711 --> 00:17:43,323 Hey. He okay? 422 00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:44,846 Yeah, he's fine. 423 00:17:44,889 --> 00:17:47,544 How you doing? Much better. 424 00:17:47,588 --> 00:17:49,546 [sighs] 425 00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:51,548 [clears throat] 426 00:17:51,592 --> 00:17:53,463 You know, I just been sitting here thinking 427 00:17:53,507 --> 00:17:57,598 how I drove an hour both ways to bring the two of them back. 428 00:17:57,641 --> 00:17:59,774 Pretty damn decent of me. 429 00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:04,605 Come here. [chuckles] 430 00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:12,613 Captioning sponsored by CBS 431 00:18:14,615 --> 00:18:16,617 WARNER BROS. TELEVISION 432 00:18:18,619 --> 00:18:20,621 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org