[Anne] Previously on
"Workin' Moms"...
- Who are these guys?
- My only clients.
- I read the article.
What a witch hunt.
- I don't think--
- You're on the right
side of this.
- Hey! Hey! Who are you?
- [Shouting] Hey!
- [Pained groans]
- For the record,
you're a psycho.
- I am gonna try
and have a baby on my own.
- This is really exciting.
- Well, it looks like
all I have to do
for the next two days is find
some pro bono work.
- And you have that dinner.
- What dinner?
- The one with me.
[Headmaster] Thank you for
meeting me last minute.
It seems the hair-cutting
incident
was just the tip
of the iceberg.
Parents and faculty
have expressed concern
with many of Charlie's
behaviours.
- [Charlie roars]
- His aggression,
his hyperactivity, and all
towards female students.
- [Scoffs] Are you calling
my son a misogynist?
- No, [chuckles]
we would never use a term like
that to describe a 3-year-old,
but it is interesting
that you would.
- Okay, okay, let's just-
can we just slow down
for a second?
I actually owe you a thank you.
That panda book was really
helpful,
and not just for Charlie,
for me, too.
Uh, being afraid isn't bad,
be yourself,
and turn sad panda glad.
That's-that's brilliant,
and it's really changed him.
[Charlie roars]
- I'm happy to hear that.
But, things haven't
improved here,
so I have decided
to suspend him.
- Suspend-suspend him?
For how long?
- 'Til Narla determines that
he's safe to reintegrate.
- Who the hell is Narla?
- [Narla clears throat]
Oh God! How long have you
been there?
- Narla is an early childhood
development specialist.
You see, in order for Charlie
to be able to return
into the classroom, she's going
to observe his behaviour,
with your signed permission,
of course.
And her fee, paid up front.
Are you telling me I'm bringing
Narla home with me,
and paying for that privilege?
- Yeah.
- Uh, I'm sorry, but I don't
think my hus-I don't--
I don't think Nathan is going
to sign off on that.
- He's already signed off on it.
- [Sneezes]
♪♪♪
♪ I go high ♪
♪ They go low ♪
♪ Won't let them run my show ♪
- So, Narla, how does this work,
exactly?
- Just go about your regular
life.
I'll blend into the background,
it will be like
I'm not even here.
Uh listen, I didn't expect
to have you, or Charlie,
with me today, and I'm in
the middle of some stuff,
so I'm gonna go ahead
and drop you off at my mom's.
She's an angel,
second mother to Charlie.
You're gonna love her.
- Mothers love me.
♪♪♪
[Door slams]
Kate: Mom!
Hey Mom, sorry to spring
this on you,
but I really need help
with the kids today.
Oh my God,
Mom, what happened?
- Ow! I so did not want you to
see me like this today, Kate,
but if you, and your very
strange friend there,
must know, I am recuperating
from vaginal rejuvenation
surgery.
And I am on a lot of drugs,
so I can be of no assistance
to you today.
- Vaginal rej--no, you did not.
- The pain will all be worth it
for the look on Barry's face.
Upon entrance.
Okay, Mom, should you even be
having voluntary surgeries
at your age? And this...
is not my friend, she's here
to observe Charlie
because he was suspended from
school for being a misogynist.
- Oh, just like your mother.
- [Clears throat]
That's not true.
She's known for her sense
of humour.
- So nice to be needed.
You know, if I knew that this
is all it took,
I would've have vaginal
rejuvenation surgery years ago.
- I'm done. Mom,
today of all days,
I really needed a parent.
Dad would've never done this.
- Well, Dad didn't have a
vagina, Katie, you know that.
♪♪♪
[Frankie] And make sure you show
the doctor
your nutrient fanny pack, so
she knows you're the real deal.
- Well, she's just gonna read
the results off a clipboard.
- Uh uh, the fanny pack helps,
trust me.
They go, "Oh, she cares!"
- [Small laugh]
- So, what are you gonna miss
most about being not pregnant?
- Mini Margarita Mondays
at Chico Mico's.
They're amazing.
- They're amazing.
But you know, they're still
gonna be here
when the baby's born,
and that's when you're
really gonna need 'em.
- Yeah.
- All right.
You sure you don't want me
to come in with you?
- Nope. I'm trying to prove
to myself
that I can handle this mom
thing alone, so.
[Sighs]
- I totally get it.
- It sounds dumb, but I'm
pretty sure it worked.
Is that crazy?
- No, not in the slightest!
I'm gonna see you at lunch.
- Okay.
- I'm bringin' the tacos.
- Yup.
- You're bringin'
the good news.
- Yeah.
♪♪♪
[Text message chimes]
[Keys clack]
- [Sneezes]
- Oh God!
- Hey! Thought I heard
a couple rascals.
- Hey.
- Hey, what's up?
- I owe you a thanks.
- For?
- My optometrist said that my
vision has slightly improved,
and I think it's from
drinking your, you know.
- Shh.
- Lucky kids, huh?
Tit milk on tap?
- No, that's a funny joke
you just made up.
So creative.
Look, the kids are here today
because there's some
complicated things
happening at home.
- Kate, real talk,
are we running away, or not?
My bags are packed.
As soon as you admit your
feelings, we're out of here,
okay? These kids,
they need a strong,
young, male presence
in their life.
- [Narla sneezes]
- Holy shit! Whew.
Ooh-h-h.
- Forrest, this is Narla, and
she's from Charlie's school.
- I did not know you
were in here.
- Yup.
- Uh right, we'll talk later.
Nice to meet you, Narla.
[Footsteps thud slowly away]
- Was he insinuating that
he drinks your breast milk?
♪♪♪
- Morning, sleepyhead,
I brought you coffee!
- What time is it?
Where are the girls?
- I took them to school.
Don't hate me,
but I called you in sick.
- What? I can't,
I have patients.
- Your patients are just gonna
have to fend
for themselves today,
because today,
it's all about this basket
case right here.
- Excuse me?
- Beautiful basket case.
Come on, let's go!
It'll be fun!
- Rude!
♪♪♪
- Look, I can't change
why you feel pain,
but...
I can give you
a place to put it.
- What?
Put it on.
[Door creaks open, feet shuffle]
[Door creaks and slams shut]
[Glass smashes]
[Attack yell]
♪♪♪
[Victorious roar]
[Growls]
♪♪♪
- Yes! Yeah!
Aw, yeah!
♪♪♪
- [Screams]
- Woo!
- Yes!
- Yeah!
- [Glass smashes]
- [Roar]
[Plates shatter]
[Case thuds heavily]
- That was so awesome!
I mean, wow.
- [Chuckles]
- I love you so much.
[Glass shatters]
♪♪♪
[Chair rattles lightly]
- [Sad exhale]
- So, I guess this means
it didn't take?
- So much for your fucking
nutrient super pack.
- What happened?
- The doctor thinks
my eggs are the problem.
- Ugh, I'm so sorry.
- The fake it 'til you make it
doesn't apply to pregnancies,
Frankie.
You got me so worked up.
Pushing me to spend God knows
how much money
on a biological impossibility.
- I was just trying
to be supportive.
- Well, that's not support.
That's being a bad friend.
- Oh, whoa, whoa.
Hey, hey.
Bianca, I know we are upset,
but you can't give up!
- But I'm broke!
I don't have the financial
resources you have, okay?
Look, it's over.
I gotta go.
- I'm sorry.
Wait! You got-you got a whole
margarita still here!
Got it.
Voicemail: Yo, yo, yo,
what up, it's Juniper,
but you already know that
though,
'cause you're callin' me.
[Laughs]
Leave a message, I might listen
to it, I might not. [Beep]
- Hey, Juniper, this is Frankie
calling, your benefactor.
Uh yeah, I'm just calling
because I haven't heard
from you, just,
you were gonna call me when
your student loan came in,
so yeah, gimme a call.
Again. This is Frankie.
[Sighs] Hmm.
- Oh, excuse me?
Hey, uh, I, excuse me, hi.
- Uh sorry, we're not open yet.
- I know, but um,
Juniper works here, right?
- Um...
- I'm a pal.
I'm a pal,
and her voicemail is full.
- She's not in today.
- Oh. Well, do you know
where she is?
- Today's Monday so...
- Oh, so school I guess.
- No, she's probably at the
park with the drum circle.
- The drum circle?
- She's actually really good.
- Of course she is.
[Drums beating rhythmically]
[Laughing]
- Juniper!
[Drums beating]
- Juniper!
- Hey! Hey. Um--
- Why aren't you in school?
- Uh yeah, I was gonna talk
to you about that.
- Uh huh?
- Mhmm.
- I... [clears throat]
come on.
I uh, I dropped out.
- Excuse me?
- I was gonna talk to you.
I was gonna tell you?
- When, exactly?
- Um, well, when I figured out
all the money stuff,
because I had to withdraw
my loan application,
so I started picking up
a few shifts here and there.
- So you didn't get
your student loan.
- Well no, I'm not a student
anymore. [Chuckles] So.
- I want my money back. Now.
- I don't have it.
- Well, what the hell did
you spend it on?
- Come here.
I'm gonna show you somethin'
in your ears.
Okay, so it isn't mixed
or mastered yet.
This is like a first draft.
The vocals have been comin'
hot, but we're fixing it.
- So you spent my money
on a demo?
♪ Keep these lips
off your lips ♪
♪ Not these lips, oh yeah,
those lips ♪
♪ These hips
These hips ♪
- Oh God, that's just-no.
- No?
Oh, it's shit, isn't it?
Fuck!
- It's-no! You lied to me!
No, I didn't like.
Okay, okay, it's not school,
but it's an education.
My producer says I've really
got something.
Maybe you're just-you're
just not the democratic.
- Demographic.
- Totally.
- [Angry sigh]
- Wait, are you mad?
- Mhmm, I am mad.
- Hey, I'll get the money.
I'll figure something out.
I'll walk dogs, or babies,
or something.
- Okay, you don't get it,
do you?
I need that money.
My friend is in so much pain.
She can't get pregnant,
and thanks to you,
and your demo,
there's nothing I can do
about it!
- Why can't she get pregnant?
Is her vagina broken?
- No! It-her eggs are broken.
- Oh. You need eggs?
I've got eggs.
- What?
- Yeah, I tried to sell them
a while back,
but they're still frozen.
They keep sending me
storage bills.
- You're comin' with me.
Come on, let's go!
- Okay. Can I get my weed?
- Nope.
♪ High ♪
♪♪♪
- Okay, so uh, Narla,
since you're with us today,
I thought maybe you could
just hold Ella
while I get this rash looked at.
I'm kidding, this is for work,
why we're here.
You don't care. Cool.
Hi!
- Hello, my name's Hannah.
Welcome.
What hassle-free services
can we offer you?
Your children? Your sister?
- I'm not here.
- No. Hi, Hannah,
I am Kate Foster.
I actually run a PR firm.
I'm not in need
of your services,
I'm actually hoping
I can help you.
- Oh.
- Completely pro bono,
of course.
I realize that generally,
women's clinics
have pretty good public images,
but you'd be surprised
what I can do for you.
My resources can attract
the attention
of some very large donors.
- Wow, Miss Foster,
if only you'd showed up
a few months ago.
- What happened, you save
all the women?
[Chuckles]
- Unfortunately, our clinic
is closing down soon.
A developer bought the land,
and I suppose the health
of women in need
isn't as profitable
as a Starbucks.
- Well, that's fuckin' bullshit!
[Ella cries]
- Oh. No--
[More babies cry]
Sorry.
Damnit.
- Thanks for coming.
[Ella cries]
- Can I hand you this
to give to Ella?
It's her favourite,
and she- [ribbit]
if you could just,
- I prefer not to get involved.
- No, no, totally.
All you'd have to do
is just sorta--
- I'm not even here.
- Could you like,
lean it on your arm and--
- I'm blending into
the background.
Here sweetie!
[Toy rattles]
There we go.
Thank you for that.
[Ella cries]
[Clears throat]
[Rapid knocking on door]
- Hi.
- Hi, I'm gonna need you
to take your family.
My mom can't take them
because of her new vagina.
Oh, and remember that
form you signed
without even getting my consent?
Meet Narla.
- I'm not even here.
[Chuckles] Oh, she's here,
all right,
and she's a real fuckin' treat.
You guys have a blast!
Bye!
- A new vagina? Kate?
Do you have any snacks?
We haven't eaten in hours.
♪♪♪
[Brakes squeak,
turns engine off]
- So, what are you guys
gonna do?
- I dunno, hang out.
- Hang out, eat snacks,
stay up late.
- Pretty much.
- Yeah. Yeah.
- 'K, I'll call you
in the morning.
- Okay. I'm just gonna come
to the door with you.
- Oh, no you really
don't have to.
- It's okay, I just have
something really quick
I wanna say to him.
- Whoa.
- It's okay,
you're not in any danger,
I just wanted to show my face
and apologize for my behaviour
the other day.
- Okay, now that's big of you,
I guess.
- Hope you can understand that
although I grossly overreacted,
I was just being protective.
I saw my daughter
in a strange man's car,
and well... you know, I freaked.
- I guess now we know where
Alice gets her spunk.
- Oh... okay.
- Hi, Mrs. Carlson.
- Hi, Brenna!
I also owe you an apology.
I'm sorry for scaring you.
There's no excuse for that.
- Oh, it-it's okay.
It was kinda funny.
- Oh.
- Mom, can I go upstairs
with Brenna?
- Yup. Away you go.
Okay. Have fun!
Those two girls,
best friends, huh?
- Yeah, besties.
- Mhmm.
- You know, it's good that uh,
we have a connection now, too.
- Uh yeah, it just took me
yanking you out of your car.
- Don't beat yourself up
about it.
But, if I may,
you know, as parents,
we wanna try to avoid
passing down some of our less
desirable attributes, you know?
- I'm not sure I follow.
- Uh, it's nothing really but...
since Brenna's been spending
so much time with Alice,
I've just noticed some
interesting new vocabulary.
- Vocabulary.
Like um, what?
- Well, for example,
the other night
she said "horseshit",
when I told her that screen
time was over for the night.
I mean, it's not that big
of a deal,
it's just something for us
to look out for.
- Mhmm.
- Just wanted to flag it.
- Flagged!
- Great.
- Yup, great.
♪ These lips, my lips ♪
♪ Which lips, those lips ♪
♪ Keep your hands off my lips ♪
[those lips]
♪ Unless you're gonna tip ♪
- I know you feel
like giving up,
but we're here because
we got a Hail Mary.
- [Sceptical sigh]
- I got eggs.
- What kinda kid you want?
Healthy eater?
I once ate like 12 hot dogs.
Resourceful?
I can turn almost anything
in this house into a bong.
You get locked outta your car,
I once broke into a van
with nothin' but a hammer
and a beer.
- What was the beer for?
- I-I drank it, and then
I smashed the window
with the hammer.
- Okay, my fertility
isn't a joke.
Both of you, out now.
- Wait! You owe me.
- I get it.
You're uncomfortable with
a little me inside of you,
although Frankie didn't have
that problem, right Frankie?
- Oh.
- You're offering me
your lover's eggs?
How old are you, anyway?
- Old enough to bag three golds
in Division 1 swimming, biatch.
- Okay, see there,
she may be a dirtbag,
but she is a talented dirtbag!
Tell her about school.
- I dropped out.
- No, not that.
- Oh, I had a 3.5 GPA.
- Well, that's-that's pretty
good.
- Yeah, right?
And her dad was in Mensa.
- Yeah. Didn't shut the fuck up
about it.
- Really?
- This feels like the right
time to tell you
that I'm also a sick musician.
- Nope, she's not.
Swims like a fish, though.
♪♪♪
- So I find that good cause,
- Mhmm.
- it was perfect.
It was this women's clinic,
and then they tell me a
developer bought up the land,
it's getting teared down.
Back to the drawing board,
I guess.
- What are you talking about?
That's the best-case scenario.
- I'm not following.
- Kate, you have the woman
power to get out,
and you become this developer's
worst nightmare.
- Oh what, like save the place?
You think a couple retweets are
gonna make these guys budge?
- Wow, I didn't know you were
so easily deterred.
- Well I'm--
- You're gonna have to get
a little more creative
than that, Kate.
If you wanna win.
Okay, these guys are clearly
willing to play dirty.
Now the question is, are you?
- Yeah.
- Where are you from?
Like, what planet?
- Did you get any angry
calls today?
- A few. Less than yesterday.
- Exactly,
and there are gonna be even
less tomorrow.
So just ride out the storm,
you're gonna be good.
[Soft piano jazz plays]
- I feel like I could say
anything to you,
and you wouldn't be affected.
- Hmm. Let's try it out.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- My son got suspended
from school.
- Grades don't matter.
- My mom got vaginal
rejuvenation surgery.
- Hobbies are healthy.
- I used to be really into
Japanese cartoon porn.
But I'm weaning myself off
of it, but...
- Good for you.
Baby steps, thereon.
- What about you?
- What about me?
I'm an open book.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Kids?
- No.
- Pets?
- No.
- Wife?
- Divorced.
- Why?
- She wanted kids.
- [Chuckles]
Favourite song?
- Ooh, "Cream", Wu-Tang.
- Really?
- Hmm, cash does rule
everything around me.
I've really loved talking
with you, Kate.
- Oh, do you have to go?
- Yeah, I do.
- It's been really nice, Kate.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Let me know if my good advice
gets you that win, huh?
- I will.
[Chuckles]
Fuck me.
[Wu-Tang Clan's "Cream" Plays]
♪ Word up ♪
♪ Cash rules everything
around me ♪
♪ Cream ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
- [Knocking on door]
♪ Check this ol' fly shit out ♪
♪ Word up ♪
- Hi.
I'm so sorry about Narla,
that was totally my bad.
God she--
♪♪♪
[Objects clatter]
♪ Cash rules everything
around me ♪
♪ Cream
Get the money ♪
♪ Dollar, dollar bill y'all ♪
♪ Cash rules everything
around me ♪
♪ Cream
Get the money ♪
♪ Dollar, dollar bill y'all ♪