1
00:00:01,002 --> 00:00:02,668
- Really? Still with
the silent treatment?
2
00:00:05,072 --> 00:00:06,839
Well, then, why did you
even answer?!
3
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,376
Listen, I'm sorry
that I left so abruptly.
4
00:00:11,379 --> 00:00:13,979
But I don't know how many
times I can apologize.
5
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:15,380
- I don't ask much.
6
00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:17,316
I just ask that
I don't come home
7
00:00:17,451 --> 00:00:19,251
And find two hungry daughters,
8
00:00:19,386 --> 00:00:21,920
And a note that just says,
"brb."
9
00:00:21,922 --> 00:00:23,655
- So I guess it didn't work?
10
00:00:25,493 --> 00:00:27,526
Honey, wynston publishing
is a really big deal.
11
00:00:27,595 --> 00:00:30,529
It might be my last chance
for my book to find a home.
12
00:00:30,598 --> 00:00:32,730
I would've been crazy
not to take this meeting.
13
00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:34,299
- Yeah, you know
what else is crazy?
14
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:37,770
Taking a vacation
one day after you start work!
15
00:00:37,905 --> 00:00:39,471
When is your return
flight home?
16
00:00:39,606 --> 00:00:41,507
- Oh, um...
- Alexa,
17
00:00:41,509 --> 00:00:43,609
Are there any flights
on the family calendar?
18
00:00:43,611 --> 00:00:45,611
Alexa: I see no flights
on the calendar.
19
00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:46,545
- (groans)
20
00:00:47,681 --> 00:00:49,547
- You didn't book
a return flight.
21
00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:51,050
- I will!
22
00:00:54,021 --> 00:00:56,422
- Really?
Silent treatment again?
23
00:00:58,059 --> 00:00:59,691
Okay. All right.
Goodbye!
24
00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:01,326
(video game beeps)
25
00:01:03,631 --> 00:01:05,497
Jesus ella, turn it down!
26
00:01:05,632 --> 00:01:07,298
(game beeps and chimes,
then stops)
27
00:01:07,334 --> 00:01:09,835
- You all right?
28
00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:11,436
- Uh, yeah.
29
00:01:11,505 --> 00:01:14,506
Yeah, I'm just tense
from the lionel thing.
30
00:01:14,542 --> 00:01:15,907
- Yeah, of course, I heard.
31
00:01:15,943 --> 00:01:17,542
But look,
we got a big day today.
32
00:01:17,611 --> 00:01:19,310
Okay, so we gotta get
our head in the game,
33
00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:21,213
And show him why you came
out here.
34
00:01:21,348 --> 00:01:23,048
- Mm-hmm.
- Because sloane is expecting
35
00:01:23,183 --> 00:01:25,317
To meet anne carlson,
parenting expert.
36
00:01:25,452 --> 00:01:28,120
And you just snapped at someone
else's two-year-old.
37
00:01:28,189 --> 00:01:30,622
- Totally. Sorry.
- Please.
38
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:34,926
- Okay, sloane.
What's she like?
39
00:01:34,995 --> 00:01:36,928
- Oh! Uh, I don't know!
40
00:01:36,964 --> 00:01:39,131
Uh, she's bitchin', you know?
(giggles)
41
00:01:39,133 --> 00:01:41,200
- Bitchin'?
- She bumps, you know?
42
00:01:41,335 --> 00:01:43,535
She fucks, she slaps.
- You're glitching.
43
00:01:43,537 --> 00:01:45,270
- You'll see.
You're gonna love her,
44
00:01:45,405 --> 00:01:47,606
You're gonna fuckin' love her!
(laughs)
45
00:01:49,643 --> 00:01:51,743
- (sighs)
46
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:54,680
♪♪♪
47
00:01:56,016 --> 00:01:58,150
- You're gay!
- You're gay!
48
00:01:58,152 --> 00:01:59,885
Sorry, I'm gonna have
to call you back.
49
00:01:59,954 --> 00:02:01,887
Jesus, can't you keep it down?!
- I saw you.
50
00:02:01,956 --> 00:02:04,423
Gropin' a man!
A man with a dick!
51
00:02:04,425 --> 00:02:06,291
- And?
- What do you mean, "and?!"
52
00:02:06,327 --> 00:02:08,393
- I'm sorry you had to see
that, but we spoke about this.
53
00:02:08,529 --> 00:02:11,296
We see other people.
- People! Not men!
54
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:13,465
- Last I checked,
men are people.
55
00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:16,034
- Okay, riddler, stop trying
to outsmart me here.
56
00:02:16,103 --> 00:02:18,470
- I don't know what to say.
In these matters like these,
57
00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:20,439
I'm... Fluid.
- (exhales)
58
00:02:21,575 --> 00:02:24,842
I, I just don't understand
how you can like this...
59
00:02:24,879 --> 00:02:26,311
And that.
60
00:02:26,347 --> 00:02:28,113
- I guess I'm a people person.
61
00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:29,848
Look, what's under the hood
is just a detail.
62
00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:31,349
- (scoffs) you know what
you're being?
63
00:02:31,418 --> 00:02:33,451
You're being greedy.
64
00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:36,454
I'm dumping your gay ass.
How's that for a detail?!
65
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:38,824
- I really do want
to keep seeing you.
66
00:02:40,460 --> 00:02:42,594
But you're right,
it's probably not wise for me
67
00:02:42,630 --> 00:02:45,964
To keep seeing someone so...
Close-minded. (sighs)
68
00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:50,402
Thanks for coming by
and making your concerns known.
69
00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:53,372
(keys clack)
70
00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:56,874
(receding footsteps clack)
71
00:02:56,911 --> 00:02:58,510
Jenny, wait.
72
00:03:00,547 --> 00:03:01,980
- Yeah?
73
00:03:04,318 --> 00:03:06,351
- Please tell marvin
I need an update
74
00:03:06,486 --> 00:03:08,320
On the perlmutter-dorman
account by end-of-day.
75
00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:12,324
- (scoffs)
76
00:03:13,894 --> 00:03:15,894
(streetcar rumbles)
77
00:03:17,631 --> 00:03:19,431
(low hum of chatter)
78
00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:23,168
- Oh!
79
00:03:23,170 --> 00:03:24,503
- Yeah.
80
00:03:24,638 --> 00:03:27,105
- Thank you, parents,
for coming to your children's
81
00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:28,840
Storybook exhibit!
82
00:03:28,976 --> 00:03:30,909
How thrilling it is to see
the way our children
83
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,511
Are learning to connect
beginnings,
84
00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:35,913
Middles, and endings.
85
00:03:35,950 --> 00:03:37,816
Enjoy!
86
00:03:37,818 --> 00:03:39,518
(parents murmur quietly)
87
00:03:41,155 --> 00:03:43,121
- Zoe made a love story.
88
00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:45,257
About a boy and a girl.
89
00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,359
And nobody else.
90
00:03:48,596 --> 00:03:50,928
- Okay, so here's charlie's.
91
00:03:50,965 --> 00:03:53,732
Clearly a beginning.
It's the uh, story of...
92
00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:55,667
- An outline of a hand.
93
00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:57,535
- Thoughts?
94
00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:59,537
- I'm gathering you're
not a fan of his story?
95
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,873
- Well, I'm starting to think
that charlie might struggle
96
00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:04,476
With "results anxiety."
97
00:04:04,611 --> 00:04:06,411
See the way the story
just sorta...
98
00:04:06,546 --> 00:04:08,413
Fizzles out?
99
00:04:08,449 --> 00:04:10,215
It's because he had a meltdown
100
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:12,884
After another student's project
received quite a bit of praise.
101
00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:16,154
- Sorry, results anxiety?
Uh, for a five-year-old?
102
00:04:16,223 --> 00:04:18,223
- Oh yeah.
- Is that normal?
103
00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:19,024
- Oh no.
104
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:22,594
If you have time, rhoda's story
is really worth a look.
105
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,830
- Oh, I'm sure it is.
- It is.
106
00:04:25,966 --> 00:04:28,367
- I swear I can almost feel
the rat's emotions
107
00:04:28,502 --> 00:04:30,435
Coming off the page!
108
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:31,970
We need to nurture this talent.
109
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:33,572
- Oh wow. Wow.
110
00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:37,843
Well, the story of a rat and
a girl, struck by lightning.
111
00:04:37,845 --> 00:04:39,711
Fused together, huh!
112
00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:41,279
- Rat-girl.
113
00:04:41,348 --> 00:04:43,781
- Rat-girl, you guys must be
very proud.
114
00:04:43,817 --> 00:04:46,351
(all chuckle)
115
00:04:47,554 --> 00:04:49,520
(frankie sighs)
116
00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:52,123
♪♪♪
117
00:04:52,159 --> 00:04:53,858
Kate: The thought of him
trying his best,
118
00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:56,061
And then getting so emotional
he can't finish?
119
00:04:56,196 --> 00:04:58,063
I can't, I can't take it.
120
00:04:58,065 --> 00:04:59,898
- Oh, I just hope he's not
alienating himself.
121
00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:01,600
- You think he has no friends?
122
00:05:01,602 --> 00:05:03,735
- Well, I don't know.
123
00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:06,338
- Okay, well,
his birthday's coming up.
124
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,740
Maybe we, you know,
invite the whole class.
125
00:05:08,776 --> 00:05:11,610
No art. No meltdown.
Just good times.
126
00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:14,145
- I love that.
(door shuts) let's do it.
127
00:05:14,181 --> 00:05:16,280
- And while I want to build up
the confidence of all the men
128
00:05:16,317 --> 00:05:18,282
In my life,
it is my duty to tell you,
129
00:05:18,319 --> 00:05:20,418
You look... Stupid in that
reflective vest.
130
00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:22,821
- Safety first.
- It's the daytime, nathan!
131
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,423
- I'm very fast.
- Nathan!
132
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:26,091
- Love you!
133
00:05:26,226 --> 00:05:27,292
Maya: What a shit show
in there!
134
00:05:27,361 --> 00:05:28,826
- Okay?
135
00:05:28,862 --> 00:05:30,695
- The way everyone fawns
over that girl's art
136
00:05:30,764 --> 00:05:32,897
Like she's monet?!
- It is so great
137
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:35,233
To hear you say that!
Charlie cannot keep up.
138
00:05:35,369 --> 00:05:37,168
I mean, rhoda's art is sending
139
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:38,637
Him into a whole goddamn
tailspin!
140
00:05:38,772 --> 00:05:40,739
- Well, if it makes you
feel better,
141
00:05:40,741 --> 00:05:42,340
I don't know what the hell
axe's story is about.
142
00:05:42,343 --> 00:05:44,242
There's like six characters,
they're all stick figures.
143
00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:47,112
No idea who's who.
- Ah, here's to dumb sons.
144
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:48,913
- Dumb sons!
145
00:05:48,949 --> 00:05:51,315
♪♪♪
146
00:05:51,352 --> 00:05:53,785
(streetcar rattles)
147
00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:56,054
- Well, anne, I can't say
I'm surprised to see you back
148
00:05:56,056 --> 00:05:57,522
From that shitty mountain town.
149
00:05:57,657 --> 00:06:00,158
- Well, it's only temporary,
unfortunately.
150
00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:01,727
I'm here to sell my book.
151
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,261
Kate got me this meeting today,
152
00:06:03,330 --> 00:06:04,863
And I'm totally freaked out
about it.
153
00:06:04,998 --> 00:06:07,265
- Pony up, cowgirl.
You know you got the goods.
154
00:06:07,267 --> 00:06:09,067
And if they don't see it,
fuck 'em.
155
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:11,002
Fuck their buttholes raw.
- What?
156
00:06:11,004 --> 00:06:13,471
- Oh, sorry, bit of a tizzy
this morning.
157
00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:18,009
It's my boys. Every interaction
leaves me with so much rage.
158
00:06:19,213 --> 00:06:20,912
Little j.J. Turns 18 today,
159
00:06:20,948 --> 00:06:22,547
And I fear if I don't do
something,
160
00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:24,416
I'm gonna be watching them
masturbate into banana peels
161
00:06:24,418 --> 00:06:26,985
For the rest of my life.
162
00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:31,556
- You know it's you that
gave me that life-changing
163
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,291
Parenting advice, right?
164
00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:35,159
- The trail of nuts?
165
00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:36,828
- Everything changed for me
once I let go of control
166
00:06:36,963 --> 00:06:39,030
And set alice free.
167
00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:41,933
Maybe it's time that you
start taking your own advice.
168
00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:45,136
- Set them free.
169
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:46,904
That's beautiful.
170
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:51,309
♪♪♪
171
00:06:51,345 --> 00:06:53,278
Kristen: (reads) "who would've
thought," asked penny,
172
00:06:53,347 --> 00:06:55,814
"that you could catch
a spider in its own web?"
173
00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:59,317
The town cheered as penny
dragged the creepy-crawly
174
00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:01,252
Away from the tea party.
175
00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,988
- Author's doing pretty good.
176
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:04,722
- I'll admit,
when she's on, she's on.
177
00:07:04,792 --> 00:07:06,658
- (reads) "the neighbourhood
slept well that night,
178
00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:09,727
Knowing the spiders
were out of sight.
179
00:07:09,729 --> 00:07:12,330
Pests don't rest,
so neither will I!"
180
00:07:12,466 --> 00:07:15,400
(audience applauds)
181
00:07:18,672 --> 00:07:20,338
- I'm gonna get going.
182
00:07:20,374 --> 00:07:22,139
- That's it?!
183
00:07:22,176 --> 00:07:24,976
(audience murmurs)
184
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,381
- That was okay, right?
- Sorry, kristen,
185
00:07:29,516 --> 00:07:31,349
Aren't you reading from
the next "penny" book now?
186
00:07:31,418 --> 00:07:33,818
- I really meant to write the
next book, I swear, it's just--
187
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:35,587
- Kristen, you're a
professional author now
188
00:07:35,589 --> 00:07:37,154
With a multiple book deal,
189
00:07:37,191 --> 00:07:38,389
Which means you meet
your deadlines.
190
00:07:38,425 --> 00:07:40,291
Did you meet your deadline?
191
00:07:40,327 --> 00:07:42,227
Or am I gonna have to make you
pay back your advance?
192
00:07:42,362 --> 00:07:44,495
- I'm sorry!
I have nothing!
193
00:07:44,531 --> 00:07:46,264
(sobs)
- hey wait, kris-
194
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:49,934
(camera clicks, crowd murmurs)
195
00:07:50,871 --> 00:07:53,405
- Holy shit, what's happening?
- A pr crisis.
196
00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:55,373
What's your plan?
197
00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:58,843
- I... Am gonna go up there.
- Yes, you are.
198
00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:00,645
- Yes, I am.
199
00:08:00,780 --> 00:08:02,881
(crowd chatters)
200
00:08:05,252 --> 00:08:06,985
Hey, guys!
201
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:10,588
So look, uh, kristen had
to run, as we uh (chuckle)
202
00:08:10,624 --> 00:08:12,457
As we all saw.
203
00:08:12,592 --> 00:08:14,659
Uh, she had to go help
penny with her next pest.
204
00:08:14,794 --> 00:08:17,028
- What's the next pest?
205
00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:20,264
- Oh, you wanna know
about that, do you?
206
00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,601
Kids: Yeah!
- Yeah.
207
00:08:22,603 --> 00:08:25,136
- I can't heaaaar you!
- (all stop, quiet)
208
00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,841
- That's not a thing anymore?
Okay.
209
00:08:29,976 --> 00:08:32,744
Uh, the uh, the next pest...
210
00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:36,314
Is...
211
00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:42,086
Is a rat, a big, hairy rat.
212
00:08:42,122 --> 00:08:44,755
Kids: Ewwww!
- Just a rat?
213
00:08:44,791 --> 00:08:46,891
- Of course, no,
it's not just a rat.
214
00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:49,594
Because this rat is... A girl.
215
00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:52,430
And a rat.
216
00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:54,599
You see, there was this girl,
and she had a pet rat.
217
00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,301
And everyone was like, ew!
218
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,102
Gross, get out of here
with that thing.
219
00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:00,338
Go back to the sewer!
So she did.
220
00:09:00,374 --> 00:09:02,907
And that night,
there was a horrible storm.
221
00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:05,843
And uh, and she was cuddling
her little pet rat,
222
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:08,179
When lightning struck, and...
223
00:09:08,315 --> 00:09:10,848
Fused them together.
224
00:09:10,918 --> 00:09:12,784
Kids: Ewww! Gross! Aaah!
225
00:09:12,786 --> 00:09:15,253
- Yeah, well, it's an origin
story, folks.
226
00:09:15,322 --> 00:09:18,423
And uh, who could possibly
defeat rat girl?
227
00:09:18,425 --> 00:09:20,324
There's only one girl up
for the job.
228
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,259
Kids: Penny!
- Penny, obviously.
229
00:09:22,296 --> 00:09:24,295
Kate: That's right!
Kids: (chanting) penny!
230
00:09:24,298 --> 00:09:28,066
- "penny pest control book two:
Revenge of the rat girl."
231
00:09:28,135 --> 00:09:31,002
Maybe. And the penny pest
control app,
232
00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:33,270
You know, at some point.
233
00:09:33,307 --> 00:09:35,607
Uh, lots of exciting stuff
in the pipeline.
234
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:37,875
Thank you so much for coming,
everyone.
235
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:39,677
(audience applauds)
man: Question?
236
00:09:39,813 --> 00:09:42,113
Is it more rat or more girl?
237
00:09:42,149 --> 00:09:44,882
- Oh! Uh, uh, a q&a period.
238
00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:47,152
Okay, uh, it's uh,
it's about fifty-fifty.
239
00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:48,353
Alright.
240
00:09:48,355 --> 00:09:50,254
- Wait, does this rat
go to school?
241
00:09:50,324 --> 00:09:51,890
- Yeah, the rat goes to school.
242
00:09:52,025 --> 00:09:53,891
It's uh, you gotta stay
in school, everyone knows that.
243
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:55,960
So of course it goes to school.
It's a tiny school,
244
00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:57,629
It's got an eraser for a bed,
alright?
245
00:09:57,631 --> 00:09:59,297
Thank you very much!
246
00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:01,833
- Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Uh, can it swim?
247
00:10:01,968 --> 00:10:03,768
- Really, man?
248
00:10:03,903 --> 00:10:06,104
(sloane and audience applaud)
249
00:10:10,510 --> 00:10:12,677
A genius, or something?
250
00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:14,312
Would you look at her work?
251
00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:16,615
When did she do all this?
252
00:10:18,986 --> 00:10:20,785
Hello?
253
00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,453
- Oh, sorry, I'm just...
254
00:10:22,489 --> 00:10:24,589
Putting the finishing
touches on a job posting.
255
00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:26,791
I have to sell 43 condos.
256
00:10:26,926 --> 00:10:29,027
Coyne realty is expanding.
257
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:31,463
- What have you got so far?
- Oh! Okay.
258
00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,465
"are you quirky? Different?
259
00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:36,468
A special person
with a special light,
260
00:10:36,603 --> 00:10:38,703
And also a licensed
real estate agent?
261
00:10:38,838 --> 00:10:40,938
Come out from the shadows,
and join...
262
00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:43,007
Frankie coyne realty."
263
00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:45,242
- "come out from the shadows?!"
- mm-hmm.
264
00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,011
- What in the world
kind of post is this?
265
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:49,547
- An inspirational one!
266
00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:52,417
How lucky am I to have a chance
to give opportunities to, to--
267
00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:54,185
- Shadow people?
- No!
268
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:57,088
To people sidelined, ignored!
That's who I used to be.
269
00:10:57,223 --> 00:10:59,557
My agency, my people.
(laughs)
270
00:11:00,560 --> 00:11:02,026
- I don't think you should
post that.
271
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:03,895
- And... Posted.
272
00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:06,230
Come on, shadow people!
273
00:11:06,266 --> 00:11:08,433
Welcome to coyne realty!
274
00:11:08,568 --> 00:11:10,568
Why don't we go around
and introduce ourselves?
275
00:11:10,637 --> 00:11:14,039
I'll start. I'm frankie,
and this is my agency.
276
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,307
Uh, I love korean rice bowls,
277
00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:18,176
And seeing the good
in everyone.
278
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,979
I'm really excited
to have you all aboard.
279
00:11:22,849 --> 00:11:24,049
Please.
280
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:25,917
- Uh, I'm brody.
281
00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:27,919
Uh, I've actually had a lot
of trouble finding work
282
00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:29,787
As a real estate agent.
283
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:32,189
But I'm not sure why, because
I'm fuckin' awesome at it!
284
00:11:33,259 --> 00:11:35,993
Um, it would just mean so much
to me if I could help people
285
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,195
Find people their dream home.
Let's go, baby!
286
00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:40,064
- Amazing, okay, welcome.
287
00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:41,933
Excellent.
288
00:11:41,935 --> 00:11:45,270
Uh... Ahem.
289
00:11:46,339 --> 00:11:49,274
- Um, I'm charlene.
290
00:11:50,777 --> 00:11:53,812
Uh, it, I'm not sure why I even
bothered to answer the ad.
291
00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:55,413
Really, I'm so sorry.
- What? No, no, no, no!
292
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,615
Wait, wait, I hired you!
293
00:11:58,618 --> 00:12:00,952
- You're right.
You're right.
294
00:12:01,021 --> 00:12:02,754
That was a stupid thing to say.
295
00:12:02,823 --> 00:12:05,489
Forget what I say before
I even say it.
296
00:12:05,525 --> 00:12:07,358
- Okay, well,
we might need to work
297
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:09,127
On the old confidence
there, charlene.
298
00:12:10,497 --> 00:12:13,297
- I am ladislav.
- Hello, ladislav.
299
00:12:13,333 --> 00:12:15,900
- I never really sell
a house properly.
300
00:12:16,035 --> 00:12:18,236
I think on account of creak.
301
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:21,438
- Oh, I'm sorry, uh, creak?
302
00:12:21,475 --> 00:12:25,243
- Yes, I have a...
Creak in my bones.
303
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:29,080
(faint creaking)
304
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,350
Hmm?
305
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,554
I think maybe ghost.
306
00:12:36,689 --> 00:12:38,789
- Spooky.
- (chuckles)
307
00:12:38,825 --> 00:12:40,658
- How could kristen
bail like that?!
308
00:12:40,727 --> 00:12:42,527
- Oh, don't even
get me started.
309
00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:43,928
Says her ideas come
to her in her dreams.
310
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:47,131
- Well, I'm happy we covered
for her until her next nap.
311
00:12:47,167 --> 00:12:49,200
- Well, kristen can take a
forever nap for all I care,
312
00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:51,269
I'm just glad that I had you.
- Hmm!
313
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,937
- I don't know how I can
possibly thank you.
314
00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:55,139
- Oh, hey, agreeing
to meet my friend anne
315
00:12:55,142 --> 00:12:56,741
Is more than enough.
316
00:12:56,810 --> 00:12:58,943
- "running your own train."
right.
- Yeah.
317
00:12:58,945 --> 00:13:00,945
- The book was actually
very good.
318
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:02,880
- Yeah?
- I'm happy to do it.
319
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:04,549
But just level with me,
is she solid?
320
00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:05,883
Because I can't take
another kristen.
321
00:13:05,952 --> 00:13:07,885
- Oh, you got nothing to worry
about with anne.
322
00:13:07,921 --> 00:13:10,155
There's nobody cooler.
323
00:13:12,192 --> 00:13:14,192
Anne: (nervous exhale)
324
00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:20,999
- So glad we're finally
sitting down.
325
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,701
Anne, this is sloane.
Sloane, this is anne.
326
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,706
Uh, sloane?
327
00:13:28,708 --> 00:13:30,775
- So, I read the book.
- Really?
328
00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:32,644
Did you like it? It's okay
if you didn't, you can pass.
329
00:13:32,646 --> 00:13:33,978
You can just, just tell me
right away,
330
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,913
Just lay it on me.
- Breathe.
331
00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:38,649
We wanna buy it.
332
00:13:38,685 --> 00:13:41,185
- You wanna buy my book?
You want, I'm a book seller?
333
00:13:41,221 --> 00:13:43,387
I'm selling my book!
Oh my gosh!
334
00:13:43,423 --> 00:13:45,690
I'm sorry, I just never thought
this was gonna happen!
335
00:13:45,759 --> 00:13:48,926
I'm a book seller! Oh my god,
fucking shit on my balls!
336
00:13:48,928 --> 00:13:50,628
- Anne!
(sloane laughs)
337
00:13:50,664 --> 00:13:52,730
- The book works.
It's insightful.
338
00:13:52,799 --> 00:13:54,398
It is practical.
339
00:13:54,434 --> 00:13:56,133
It's the right amount
of controversial.
340
00:13:56,203 --> 00:13:59,103
- Thank you.
Wait, what? Controversial?
341
00:13:59,105 --> 00:14:01,139
- Yeah, you know, telling
parents they can phone it in.
342
00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:04,075
- The book is about promoting
smart decision-making
343
00:14:04,144 --> 00:14:06,477
Through trust, not through
"phoning it in."
344
00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:08,079
Did you read the book?
345
00:14:08,081 --> 00:14:09,948
- (laughs) excuse me?
346
00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:11,850
- Okay, ah, let's just take
a beat for a second.
347
00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:13,885
Exciting moment,
emotions are running high,
348
00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:15,854
Plus I think she might be
on antibiotics,
349
00:14:15,989 --> 00:14:17,622
Just keep that in
consideration.
350
00:14:17,624 --> 00:14:19,824
- If you can't handle
my little throwaway comment,
351
00:14:19,959 --> 00:14:21,893
How can I trust you're
gonna keep it together
352
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,862
When facing the public?
- Who's facing the public?
353
00:14:23,997 --> 00:14:26,530
I'm not facing any public,
the book speaks for itself.
354
00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:29,434
- Well, "parenting expert"
is not an accredited degree.
355
00:14:29,436 --> 00:14:31,769
These kinds of titles
specifically require
356
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:33,371
Public appearances.
357
00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:35,372
The only way you can prove that
you're a leader in the field
358
00:14:35,408 --> 00:14:36,908
Is through a press tour.
359
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:39,343
- Yeah, I'd be with you
every step of the way.
360
00:14:39,345 --> 00:14:41,713
- Sorry, this is just news
to me.
361
00:14:41,848 --> 00:14:43,548
- Well, the appearances
are part of the deal,
362
00:14:43,683 --> 00:14:47,085
And as you can see,
it's a pretty good deal.
363
00:14:48,255 --> 00:14:49,853
Page eight.
364
00:14:49,890 --> 00:14:52,123
(pages rustle)
365
00:14:56,930 --> 00:14:58,796
- Yeah?
366
00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:01,399
- Fuckin' shit on my balls!
367
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,134
♪♪♪
368
00:15:03,269 --> 00:15:05,069
Gena: Hey, how you doin'?
- Bad!
369
00:15:05,138 --> 00:15:07,405
- Whoa, never mind. Bye!
370
00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:09,340
- I'm just dealing
with a lot right now.
371
00:15:09,475 --> 00:15:11,142
- I just, I got something
in the microwave, so--
372
00:15:11,211 --> 00:15:13,678
- Okay, fine, I'll tell you!
373
00:15:13,813 --> 00:15:16,247
I just had to dump someone,
because it turns out...
374
00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:18,216
He's gay.
375
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:22,353
- He told you that?
- Basically.
376
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:24,989
- Well, like, what'd he say?
That he's not into girls?
377
00:15:24,991 --> 00:15:27,692
- No, he is. He likes both.
378
00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:30,862
He started talking about fluid,
like, get a grip, dude.
379
00:15:30,997 --> 00:15:33,197
- So you broke up with him?
380
00:15:33,333 --> 00:15:36,067
- Well, yes!
- Kinda homophobic, no?
381
00:15:36,202 --> 00:15:37,969
- Excuse me?
382
00:15:37,971 --> 00:15:40,638
- Well, if he's still into you
it sounds like he's bi,
383
00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:43,307
Or pansexual, not gay.
384
00:15:43,310 --> 00:15:45,109
- Am I supposed to know
what that is?
385
00:15:45,145 --> 00:15:46,978
- Well, you're supposed to
be open to learning about it
386
00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:48,513
If you wanna date in the 20's.
387
00:15:48,648 --> 00:15:51,248
- So I'm...
388
00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:53,317
A homophobe?
389
00:15:53,353 --> 00:15:56,454
♪♪♪
390
00:15:56,589 --> 00:15:59,323
Val: I hope you've enjoyed
your time in my care.
391
00:15:59,325 --> 00:16:01,225
And you're both of legal age
now, so have a little cake,
392
00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:03,127
And then get out of my house.
393
00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:06,731
(boys laugh)
394
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:07,966
- Totally.
- Mom!
395
00:16:08,101 --> 00:16:10,001
- What are you doing?
- Taking anne's advice.
396
00:16:10,003 --> 00:16:11,936
Which was to take
my own advice.
397
00:16:11,938 --> 00:16:13,805
I'm setting them free.
- Hmm.
398
00:16:13,940 --> 00:16:15,940
- I mean it, boys.
Time to go.
399
00:16:16,009 --> 00:16:17,909
- Go where?
- Anywhere but here.
400
00:16:17,911 --> 00:16:21,112
I've packed your suitcases,
and they're by the door.
401
00:16:21,247 --> 00:16:22,814
- Honey, maybe this
is a little rushed.
402
00:16:22,949 --> 00:16:25,149
- I'm ripping off a band-aid,
they'll thank me for it.
403
00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:27,351
- Where will we get money?
- You'll get jobs.
404
00:16:27,354 --> 00:16:29,587
- Why right now, though?
It's almost nighttime.
405
00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:32,357
- Yeah, and why are you
in a silk robe?
406
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,492
- Because after you leave,
mel and I are going
407
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:37,895
To celebrate your departure
on every surface of this house.
408
00:16:37,931 --> 00:16:40,431
And I can tell you that
because you're adults now.
409
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,234
- That's so fucking gross!
410
00:16:43,236 --> 00:16:45,169
- What are we supposed to eat,
mom?!
411
00:16:46,206 --> 00:16:48,105
Quick, dude, fill your belly!
Fill your belly!
412
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,774
- What? Oh!
413
00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:52,443
- What in god's name
are you doing?
414
00:16:52,579 --> 00:16:54,245
- We don't know the next time
we're gonna eat, mom!
415
00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:55,913
- Well, you're not bears!
416
00:16:55,915 --> 00:16:58,315
You can't just store up
for winter.
417
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,818
Boys, one more mouthful,
and then out!
418
00:17:00,887 --> 00:17:04,188
(boys sob)
419
00:17:04,323 --> 00:17:06,324
(food crunches)
420
00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:09,527
- (sighs)
- (boys whimper)
421
00:17:14,100 --> 00:17:15,033
Now.
422
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:20,938
- (sobs)
423
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:25,209
(door latch clicks)
424
00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:28,512
(door slams)
425
00:17:28,548 --> 00:17:31,315
- (happy exhale) we're free.
426
00:17:31,317 --> 00:17:33,051
Joseph: Where are we supposed
to take dumps?!
427
00:17:36,255 --> 00:17:39,223
♪♪
428
00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:42,226
- (laughs) it's okay!
- Oh, it was--
429
00:17:42,295 --> 00:17:44,595
- Um... Hi?
430
00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:49,567
- Hi. I just wanted you to know
that what you're doing is okay.
431
00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:51,636
And I was wrong to be
so grossed out.
432
00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:53,571
Even though it just came
naturally.
433
00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:55,072
- Who is this?
- I'm the other woman.
434
00:17:55,207 --> 00:17:57,508
Or, I was.
And I can be.
435
00:17:57,643 --> 00:18:00,244
Because sexuality
is actually a spectrum.
436
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:02,113
- Well, I'm glad that
what we're doing is okay.
437
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:03,514
Anything else?
438
00:18:03,649 --> 00:18:05,349
Because I thought you
"dumped my gay ass."
439
00:18:05,351 --> 00:18:07,852
- She said that to you?
- That was before.
440
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:10,121
When I was homophobic.
And for that, I'm sorry.
441
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:12,923
But I have done a ton
of research today,
442
00:18:12,959 --> 00:18:14,658
And I learned a lot.
443
00:18:14,727 --> 00:18:18,196
The kinsey scale, marsha p.
Johnson, ru paul's drag race.
444
00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:19,930
- Ru paul's drag race?
445
00:18:19,966 --> 00:18:21,999
- Oh, yes!
446
00:18:22,001 --> 00:18:23,801
And while we're on
the subject...
447
00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:26,571
Who do you homos think is gonna
be the next celebrity judge?
448
00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:34,545
Oh, I'm sorry, am I not
allowed to weigh in?
449
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,481
Like, who's homophobic now?
450
00:18:38,084 --> 00:18:40,818
- This is like, weird,
or something.
451
00:18:43,256 --> 00:18:46,557
Kate: Here she goes!
She... Signed it!
452
00:18:46,692 --> 00:18:49,293
Come on, you bastard!
- Ohhhh!
453
00:18:49,428 --> 00:18:52,095
- You sold a book!
454
00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:54,532
You're a motherfuckin'
published author!
455
00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:57,201
- Mmmm!
- Anne!
456
00:18:57,336 --> 00:18:59,770
- I sold a book!
(both laugh)
457
00:18:59,839 --> 00:19:01,505
I can't believe this
is happening.
458
00:19:01,508 --> 00:19:03,507
I've been dreaming
about my book on display
459
00:19:03,543 --> 00:19:05,710
In stores forever!
460
00:19:05,712 --> 00:19:07,244
I can see the cover,
and everything.
461
00:19:07,246 --> 00:19:10,581
- What does it look like?
- It's uh...
462
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,216
- Come on.
463
00:19:12,218 --> 00:19:14,251
- It's alice and I...
464
00:19:14,287 --> 00:19:17,188
Just like laughing
our asses off
465
00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:19,023
Like equals, you know?
466
00:19:19,092 --> 00:19:21,458
On the other side
of all that drama.
467
00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:24,094
Black and white, on like,
a blue background.
468
00:19:24,130 --> 00:19:26,730
Helvetica font for the title.
469
00:19:26,799 --> 00:19:28,532
- You've really thought
this through.
470
00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:30,534
- Do you think it's dumb?
- No, I don't think it's dumb!
471
00:19:30,537 --> 00:19:33,738
We're gonna get you
that frickin' display.
472
00:19:33,873 --> 00:19:35,138
But you might have
to call lionel,
473
00:19:35,175 --> 00:19:37,141
'cause you're gonna be here
a little bit longer.
474
00:19:37,143 --> 00:19:39,009
- A media tour.
- Mm-hmm.
475
00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:41,345
- Yeah, man, I just wanted
to write a book to help people,
476
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,013
I did not wanna be a brand.
477
00:19:43,015 --> 00:19:45,349
- Brands are why people
buy stuff, okay?
478
00:19:45,484 --> 00:19:47,684
And look, the media tour
is a couple weeks.
479
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,154
Your book though?
Forever.
480
00:19:50,156 --> 00:19:51,556
- What about you and me?
481
00:19:51,691 --> 00:19:53,991
You think this is a good idea,
us working together?
482
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:55,826
- Totally, totally.
483
00:19:55,828 --> 00:19:57,762
- Kate.
- What? Uh...
484
00:19:59,332 --> 00:20:01,165
There's one thing.
- Uh-huh?
485
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:02,900
- Like, if I had to pick
something,
486
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,236
With a gun to my head.
- Okay, yeah?
487
00:20:06,272 --> 00:20:08,806
- You... You got a little
bit of a temper.
488
00:20:08,875 --> 00:20:10,708
Look, as your friend,
it's a party,
489
00:20:10,777 --> 00:20:11,975
You know what I mean,
I love it.
490
00:20:12,011 --> 00:20:13,911
But as your publicist...
491
00:20:14,046 --> 00:20:16,280
It could be a problem.
492
00:20:16,415 --> 00:20:18,182
- So it's not a good idea?
493
00:20:18,184 --> 00:20:20,317
- It's just something
you gotta keep an eye on.
494
00:20:20,353 --> 00:20:22,186
But you can keep the genie
in the bottle, right?
495
00:20:22,321 --> 00:20:24,855
- Yes! Yep.
- Well, then!
496
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:26,657
Cheers to you...
497
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,525
Totally fuckin' controlling
your temper.
498
00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:30,360
- I just need to know
that you got my back.
499
00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:34,131
- I have got your back
so hard, that...
500
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:36,534
You know what?
Gimme this. Watch.
501
00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:38,201
- What are you doing?
502
00:20:38,238 --> 00:20:40,171
(pen scratches)
- huh? Who's that?
503
00:20:40,306 --> 00:20:42,540
- This guy.
- Anne carlson!
504
00:20:42,675 --> 00:20:44,408
- Yes.
- And, uh-oh!
505
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:47,511
Who's this?
(pen scratches)
506
00:20:49,515 --> 00:20:51,815
- It says, "fack."
why would you write that?
507
00:20:51,817 --> 00:20:54,885
- Kate's got your back,
foster's got your front,
508
00:20:54,887 --> 00:20:56,453
I'm on every side of you.
509
00:20:56,489 --> 00:20:58,555
(both laugh)
510
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:00,591
I got both sides of you!
- I get it, I get it.
511
00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:02,860
- "what's fack mean?!"
let's fackin' go!
512
00:21:02,862 --> 00:21:04,495
- (laughs)
513
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:06,163
- You wrote a book!
514
00:21:06,199 --> 00:21:08,599
- I wrote a book!
- Awwwwwooo!