1 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:05,011 ♪ Can you do the statue dance ♪ 2 00:00:05,035 --> 00:00:07,747 ♪ The statue dance the statue dance ♪ 3 00:00:07,771 --> 00:00:09,249 ♪ When I sing this song ♪ 4 00:00:09,273 --> 00:00:11,584 ♪ You dance along ♪ 5 00:00:11,608 --> 00:00:13,219 ♪ And when I stop ♪ 6 00:00:13,243 --> 00:00:14,403 You freeze! 7 00:00:15,279 --> 00:00:17,424 Everybody was very good, except for Forrest. 8 00:00:17,448 --> 00:00:19,426 Forrest, you moved. Okay! 9 00:00:20,751 --> 00:00:23,196 Oh Charlie, are you ready for camp? 10 00:00:23,220 --> 00:00:24,798 Are you ready for camp? 11 00:00:24,822 --> 00:00:26,132 Oh jeez, I'm trying to drive here. 12 00:00:26,156 --> 00:00:28,334 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I keep remembering, 13 00:00:28,358 --> 00:00:30,637 - and I get so pumped! - We're goin' to Banff, baby! 14 00:00:30,661 --> 00:00:32,939 Whaaat? We're gonna be on a mountaintop! 15 00:00:32,963 --> 00:00:34,207 Let's get away, ditch these kids! 16 00:00:34,231 --> 00:00:36,576 Let's have sex, remember that whole thing? 17 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:37,977 Jeez. Yes, we need to do that. 18 00:00:40,504 --> 00:00:42,415 ♪ Can you do the statue dance ♪ 19 00:00:42,439 --> 00:00:44,884 ♪ The statue dance the statue dance ♪ 20 00:00:44,908 --> 00:00:48,221 ♪ When I sing this song you dance along... ♪ 21 00:00:48,245 --> 00:00:50,879 ♪ And when I stop you freeze! ♪ 22 00:00:52,348 --> 00:00:53,593 Did you make dinner reservations? 23 00:00:53,617 --> 00:00:55,428 Months ago, when I booked the trip. 24 00:00:55,452 --> 00:00:58,264 And I also reserved plenty of time for... sandwich making. 25 00:00:59,890 --> 00:01:03,136 - Pass the baloney sandwich. - I'll get you the mortadella. 26 00:01:03,160 --> 00:01:05,472 - Right away. Mm! - Oh! 27 00:01:05,496 --> 00:01:08,641 ♪ When I sing this song you dance along ♪ 28 00:01:08,665 --> 00:01:10,565 ♪ And when I stop you freeze! ♪ 29 00:01:16,205 --> 00:01:18,173 Beatrice, statues don't scratch. 30 00:01:30,820 --> 00:01:33,488 Oh shit. 31 00:01:38,128 --> 00:01:41,796 Liiiiiiice! 32 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:48,381 - What the fuck? - What the... 33 00:01:51,842 --> 00:01:53,052 Kate, they said it's the worst outbreak 34 00:01:53,076 --> 00:01:54,921 - the camp has ever seen. - No, I mean, 35 00:01:54,945 --> 00:01:56,623 this is pointless, he wasn't even there. 36 00:01:56,647 --> 00:01:58,758 We need a professional second opinion. 37 00:01:58,782 --> 00:02:02,095 I'm calling the Lice Lady. She has a mobile delousing service. 38 00:02:02,119 --> 00:02:03,663 Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock! 39 00:02:03,687 --> 00:02:05,098 Hi, Mom. 40 00:02:05,122 --> 00:02:06,666 I brought the keys for the timeshare, 41 00:02:06,690 --> 00:02:09,135 and can you keep your eyes peeled for a pair of handcuffs, 42 00:02:09,159 --> 00:02:11,726 Barry seems to think he left them behind. 43 00:02:12,862 --> 00:02:14,007 Hey, bud. 44 00:02:14,810 --> 00:02:16,665 Oh, what are these? 45 00:02:17,536 --> 00:02:20,146 What, are you auditioning for "Bitter Spinster, the Musical?" 46 00:02:20,170 --> 00:02:22,982 Excuse me, I am in Future Magazine's 47 00:02:23,006 --> 00:02:25,251 "Top 40 Under 40" feature. 48 00:02:25,275 --> 00:02:27,720 Kind of impressive, your daughter, huh? 49 00:02:27,744 --> 00:02:30,423 - Do you have to pose nude? - What?! No! 50 00:02:30,447 --> 00:02:32,559 Oh. Well, you can't use these. 51 00:02:32,583 --> 00:02:34,527 No one wants a severe-looking woman, Kate. 52 00:02:34,551 --> 00:02:35,795 Severe... 53 00:02:35,819 --> 00:02:37,463 Oh! I can't get through. 54 00:02:37,487 --> 00:02:39,599 - See you at the airport? - Can't wait. 55 00:02:39,623 --> 00:02:42,235 Muah! Oh, I'll text you the Lice Lady's number, 56 00:02:42,259 --> 00:02:44,304 don't forget to call her. I gotta go to court. Bye! 57 00:02:44,328 --> 00:02:46,406 - Sure. - Lice? What? What lice? 58 00:02:46,430 --> 00:02:48,608 Yeah, that's why Charlie's camp was canceled, 59 00:02:48,632 --> 00:02:50,043 there was a lice outbreak there. 60 00:02:51,141 --> 00:02:53,146 - Shit, I gotta go. - No, no, no! Where are you going? 61 00:02:53,169 --> 00:02:54,981 You can't leave me here for the weekend like this! 62 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:57,517 Oh please, I'm like, 75% sure he doesn't have it. 63 00:02:57,541 --> 00:03:00,734 75%? Katie! 64 00:03:00,769 --> 00:03:04,355 I just had my roots done! Gosh! 65 00:03:04,390 --> 00:03:06,593 I love you, bye! 66 00:03:10,654 --> 00:03:13,933 Okay, so we shampoo her head with this. 67 00:03:13,957 --> 00:03:16,469 And then we carefully comb her hair 68 00:03:16,493 --> 00:03:19,172 in all directions with this, to remove the nits. 69 00:03:19,196 --> 00:03:20,907 Okay. What's a nit? 70 00:03:20,931 --> 00:03:22,942 Uh... they're eggs. 71 00:03:22,966 --> 00:03:24,944 - Oh. Ugh. - You scratched your head! 72 00:03:24,968 --> 00:03:26,980 - What? No, I didn't. - Yes, you did! 73 00:03:27,004 --> 00:03:30,042 - You have it! - No, I don't. 74 00:03:32,875 --> 00:03:35,154 Okay, that's it! Pick her up! Down to the basement. 75 00:03:35,178 --> 00:03:38,558 Jayme, honey, you're gonna go downstairs with Daddy, okay? 76 00:03:38,582 --> 00:03:39,914 Psssst! 77 00:03:41,517 --> 00:03:43,229 What are you doing?! 78 00:03:43,253 --> 00:03:45,654 You are under quarantine until you've been deloused. 79 00:03:46,656 --> 00:03:48,301 Let me know when you're done the treatment, 80 00:03:48,325 --> 00:03:50,492 I have work to do. And wash your clothes! 81 00:03:53,562 --> 00:03:55,196 Man, Mummy's crazy. 82 00:03:55,867 --> 00:03:57,344 I don't think we'll have any trouble 83 00:03:57,374 --> 00:03:59,646 getting what we're asking for this. 84 00:03:59,670 --> 00:04:01,981 Is there anything else I should know before we uh, 85 00:04:02,005 --> 00:04:03,483 before we show it? 86 00:04:03,507 --> 00:04:04,917 I showed you the new water heater, 87 00:04:04,941 --> 00:04:06,853 and then the repairs to the veranda, 88 00:04:06,877 --> 00:04:08,688 I told you my wife died here, 89 00:04:08,712 --> 00:04:10,857 and you saw the remodel of the carriage house. 90 00:04:10,881 --> 00:04:12,825 Your-your wife died here? 91 00:04:12,849 --> 00:04:14,527 Uh, yes. 92 00:04:14,551 --> 00:04:16,462 Why, is that bad? 93 00:04:16,486 --> 00:04:18,364 No, I um... 94 00:04:18,388 --> 00:04:21,567 She wasn't murdered, or anything awful like that. 95 00:04:21,591 --> 00:04:24,771 She died naturally when she slipped, 96 00:04:24,795 --> 00:04:26,305 getting out of the tub, and... 97 00:04:26,329 --> 00:04:28,007 hit her head on the floor. 98 00:04:28,031 --> 00:04:30,510 Oh my... that is awful. 99 00:04:30,534 --> 00:04:31,878 I can't imagine what it would've been like 100 00:04:31,902 --> 00:04:32,946 to have found her. 101 00:04:33,009 --> 00:04:35,548 The police found her. I was away at the time. 102 00:04:35,572 --> 00:04:37,684 The neighbors reported it when they saw the raccoons 103 00:04:37,708 --> 00:04:40,153 going in and out of the bathroom window. 104 00:04:40,177 --> 00:04:41,521 Raccoons? 105 00:04:41,545 --> 00:04:43,356 Yes. They were um... 106 00:04:43,380 --> 00:04:45,258 - feasting on... - Ohhhh! Oh man, sorry. 107 00:04:45,282 --> 00:04:47,527 Look, the other real estate agents told me 108 00:04:47,551 --> 00:04:49,295 you don't have to tell a buyer about a death 109 00:04:49,319 --> 00:04:51,597 - unless they ask. - Mm. 110 00:04:51,621 --> 00:04:53,733 - But they always ask! - Mhmm. 111 00:04:53,757 --> 00:04:55,935 People are morbid. 112 00:04:55,959 --> 00:04:57,637 Leave it to me. 113 00:04:57,661 --> 00:04:59,672 I'll find someone to love this house the way 114 00:04:59,696 --> 00:05:02,564 you and your wife loved it for so many years. 115 00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:05,566 Yeah. 116 00:05:07,436 --> 00:05:10,083 Here we have the master bathroom. 117 00:05:10,107 --> 00:05:12,151 Oh! I've always wanted a soaker tub! 118 00:05:12,175 --> 00:05:14,420 You'd be liable to kill yourself gettin' out of that. 119 00:05:15,946 --> 00:05:19,325 The vanity and all the fixtures are original to the home. 120 00:05:19,349 --> 00:05:21,427 Uh, there's a big crack in the floor. 121 00:05:21,451 --> 00:05:23,463 Someone must've smashed something pretty good. 122 00:05:24,044 --> 00:05:25,754 I know a great tile guy. 123 00:05:26,021 --> 00:05:28,634 Well, nice windows, lots of light. 124 00:05:28,658 --> 00:05:30,970 Are those claw marks on the sill? 125 00:05:30,994 --> 00:05:33,239 They had a-they had a cat. 126 00:05:33,263 --> 00:05:35,308 - Yeah, a big, big one. - Did it die? 127 00:05:35,332 --> 00:05:37,076 No, nobody died. 128 00:05:37,100 --> 00:05:40,633 - You said they "had" a cat. - Oh, well, they still do. 129 00:05:40,668 --> 00:05:42,815 You got a great view back there of the patio. 130 00:05:42,839 --> 00:05:44,984 Oh gosh, can you imagine yourself down there, 131 00:05:45,008 --> 00:05:46,786 flipping some burgers, hey, Dennis? 132 00:05:46,810 --> 00:05:48,621 He's a vegetarian. 133 00:05:48,645 --> 00:05:50,656 I don't eat anything with a face. 134 00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:53,025 You know, it'd be great if we could chat 135 00:05:53,049 --> 00:05:55,094 about the particulars of the house with the owners. 136 00:05:55,118 --> 00:05:56,896 Oh yeah, do you think they're the kind of people 137 00:05:56,920 --> 00:05:58,564 who would be into that? 138 00:05:58,588 --> 00:06:00,466 Totally, they're great. 139 00:06:00,490 --> 00:06:03,102 Just full of life, busy professionals with kids, 140 00:06:03,126 --> 00:06:06,239 like yourselves, so, no harm in asking. 141 00:06:07,206 --> 00:06:08,295 Great! 142 00:06:11,802 --> 00:06:13,212 Hey, G. 143 00:06:13,236 --> 00:06:14,914 Rhoda has lice from dirty camp! 144 00:06:14,938 --> 00:06:17,083 What? Well, did you call the Lice Lady? 145 00:06:17,107 --> 00:06:19,652 She's completely booked. She laughed at me, Frankie! 146 00:06:19,676 --> 00:06:20,887 Laughed! 147 00:06:20,911 --> 00:06:22,855 Okay, well, I'll do Rhoda myself. 148 00:06:22,879 --> 00:06:24,056 You know how? 149 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:25,958 For sure, you grow up with a mane like mine, 150 00:06:25,982 --> 00:06:28,995 you learn how to deal with a few mice in the rafters. 151 00:06:29,019 --> 00:06:30,396 Gross! 152 00:06:30,420 --> 00:06:32,086 Okay, see you soon. 153 00:06:34,921 --> 00:06:36,424 Oooh! 154 00:06:38,427 --> 00:06:41,307 Oh! Maya, these are amazing! 155 00:06:41,930 --> 00:06:44,043 Thanks, I told Chris to come post-practice, 156 00:06:44,067 --> 00:06:45,978 so his relaxation was more authentic. 157 00:06:46,002 --> 00:06:48,648 Honestly, I cannot believe you got Chris Gomes, Richard. 158 00:06:48,672 --> 00:06:51,472 Craig is gonna flip over these shots! 159 00:06:52,575 --> 00:06:54,387 All I can see is girl hair! 160 00:06:54,877 --> 00:06:56,455 Could you wear pigtails, or something? 161 00:06:56,479 --> 00:06:58,157 Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?! 162 00:06:58,181 --> 00:07:01,028 Maya, you nailed it. We'll let you know our favorites 163 00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,696 - by the end of the week. - That works. 164 00:07:02,709 --> 00:07:04,964 Great, and you know what? Speaking of favorites... 165 00:07:04,988 --> 00:07:06,666 which executive headshot should I use 166 00:07:06,690 --> 00:07:09,302 for my "40 Under 40" interview? 167 00:07:09,316 --> 00:07:10,319 Maybe this one? 168 00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:11,320 - Eww. - No. 169 00:07:11,394 --> 00:07:12,972 You don't really look like yourself. 170 00:07:12,996 --> 00:07:15,141 What do you mean? Oh, 'cause my mouth is closed. 171 00:07:15,165 --> 00:07:17,210 Yeah, it's kind of an unnatural state for these lips. 172 00:07:17,234 --> 00:07:19,879 Oh yeah, they're not really regular up and down lips, 173 00:07:19,903 --> 00:07:22,248 are they? They're more like flesh... drapes. 174 00:07:22,272 --> 00:07:25,351 Yeah, you know, I have a travel bag with a busted zipper 175 00:07:25,375 --> 00:07:27,275 that reminds me of your smile. 176 00:07:29,278 --> 00:07:30,990 Thanks for the feedback guys, please leave. 177 00:07:31,014 --> 00:07:32,959 Okay, thank you. 178 00:07:32,983 --> 00:07:35,995 Hey, don't sweat the interview. 179 00:07:36,019 --> 00:07:37,997 They just wanna sing your praises, trust me. 180 00:07:38,021 --> 00:07:39,665 Hmm. 181 00:07:39,689 --> 00:07:41,667 Ah, maybe I should forgo using a pic, 182 00:07:41,691 --> 00:07:43,903 just use an avatar, like, a bunny with a briefcase, 183 00:07:43,927 --> 00:07:44,984 or something. 184 00:07:45,061 --> 00:07:46,606 Just let me take your picture. 185 00:07:46,630 --> 00:07:48,741 Oh, no, no, no, no, no! My makeup's not right. 186 00:07:48,765 --> 00:07:51,277 And my outfit's not like, executive enough, 187 00:07:51,301 --> 00:07:53,279 and my mouth is well... 188 00:07:53,303 --> 00:07:55,214 well, it's forever weird. 189 00:07:55,238 --> 00:07:57,583 Your makeup is fine, your clothes are great, 190 00:07:57,607 --> 00:07:58,985 and your mouth is beautiful. 191 00:07:59,009 --> 00:08:00,686 Thank you, but... 192 00:08:00,710 --> 00:08:02,154 someone at a lipstick counter the other day 193 00:08:02,178 --> 00:08:03,723 told me I was brave. 194 00:08:03,747 --> 00:08:06,392 - Girl. - Wait, what? Oh! 195 00:08:06,416 --> 00:08:08,194 Gotcha! 196 00:08:08,218 --> 00:08:09,228 What do you mean, gotcha? 197 00:08:09,252 --> 00:08:10,997 That's what I'm talking about! 198 00:08:11,021 --> 00:08:12,099 - See? - Huh! 199 00:08:12,156 --> 00:08:14,967 Now we can take some pictures. That's very relaxed. 200 00:08:14,991 --> 00:08:18,204 It was that easy. Let me just take a few more, alright? 201 00:08:18,228 --> 00:08:21,140 Okay, alright, yeah. I'll do one where I close my mouth. 202 00:08:26,892 --> 00:08:29,892 Hey, this is Bobby. 203 00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:31,250 We're just gonna hang out. 204 00:08:31,274 --> 00:08:32,818 Yeah, you should've asked me before you invited 205 00:08:32,842 --> 00:08:35,554 a friend over, but... 206 00:08:35,578 --> 00:08:37,990 but that's fine, that's cool. 207 00:08:40,116 --> 00:08:42,228 Anne, we're hungry. 208 00:08:42,252 --> 00:08:44,397 Please feed the people under the stairs. 209 00:08:44,421 --> 00:08:46,265 Ah, Dad and Jayme have lice. 210 00:08:46,289 --> 00:08:47,733 So I put them in the basement for now. 211 00:08:47,757 --> 00:08:49,635 Just order a pizza! 212 00:08:49,659 --> 00:08:51,426 - Let's go upstairs. - Hey! 213 00:08:52,628 --> 00:08:56,108 You know, people think that squirrels aren't smart, 214 00:08:56,132 --> 00:08:59,245 but they are, instinctually. 215 00:08:59,269 --> 00:09:01,781 Okay. 216 00:09:01,805 --> 00:09:03,849 My door is always open, 217 00:09:03,873 --> 00:09:07,386 if you and Bobby ever be ready to... 218 00:09:07,410 --> 00:09:09,655 - find a nut. - Bobby's gay. 219 00:09:09,679 --> 00:09:11,724 Okay. That's great. 220 00:09:11,748 --> 00:09:14,486 - Hm. - Yeah. Okay! 221 00:09:14,521 --> 00:09:16,851 Guys, go have fun. Have a great time. 222 00:09:19,989 --> 00:09:21,934 So I thought we could do the interview in here, 223 00:09:21,958 --> 00:09:23,903 a little less white noise. 224 00:09:23,927 --> 00:09:26,627 It certainly is very... white out there. 225 00:09:28,263 --> 00:09:31,010 So in the past, the "40 Under 40" interviews 226 00:09:31,034 --> 00:09:33,145 have focused on the success story. 227 00:09:33,169 --> 00:09:34,747 Hmm. 228 00:09:34,771 --> 00:09:38,217 I'm interested in how you send the elevator back down. 229 00:09:38,241 --> 00:09:40,319 Yeah, um, right. 230 00:09:40,343 --> 00:09:42,655 Which-uh, which elevator? 231 00:09:43,464 --> 00:09:45,946 So you've achieved a certain top-floor status, 232 00:09:45,981 --> 00:09:46,759 Oh. 233 00:09:46,783 --> 00:09:48,427 ...and that floor is mostly occupied by men. 234 00:09:48,451 --> 00:09:50,863 How do you plan to send the elevator back down, 235 00:09:50,887 --> 00:09:53,299 to all of the women waiting for you at the bottom? 236 00:09:54,124 --> 00:09:56,102 Uh well, I contribute to several causes, 237 00:09:56,126 --> 00:09:58,404 such as the East York Women's Health Centre. 238 00:09:58,826 --> 00:10:00,072 I've also... 239 00:10:00,096 --> 00:10:02,630 donated some very nice pantsuits. 240 00:10:03,665 --> 00:10:05,778 Um, I'm kidding about the pantsuits thing, 241 00:10:05,802 --> 00:10:07,713 - but I... - _ 242 00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:11,139 I have donated several, which have been very nice. 243 00:10:12,374 --> 00:10:14,887 Yeah, so that's not really what we're talking about here. 244 00:10:16,418 --> 00:10:17,645 Yeah. 245 00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:19,692 Shit. 246 00:10:19,721 --> 00:10:21,294 Sorry, is something bugging you? 247 00:10:21,304 --> 00:10:22,589 Bugging? Um, hmm? 248 00:10:24,220 --> 00:10:26,265 Would you excuse me for a second? 249 00:10:26,289 --> 00:10:28,000 Excuse me. 250 00:10:30,060 --> 00:10:31,904 Frankie! Thank God, hi. 251 00:10:31,928 --> 00:10:33,639 Kate! Yeah, uh, I need to ask you a favor. 252 00:10:33,663 --> 00:10:35,641 Oh my God, I would love to, but I'm in the middle 253 00:10:35,665 --> 00:10:37,476 of a serious lice crisis here. 254 00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:39,011 What's the deal with the Lice Lady? 255 00:10:39,035 --> 00:10:41,714 Well, she's overrated, and overbooked. 256 00:10:41,738 --> 00:10:44,884 I treated Rhoda myself. You want me to treat Charlie? 257 00:10:44,908 --> 00:10:47,553 Yes, and-and when you're done with that, um... 258 00:10:47,577 --> 00:10:49,121 would you please come to my office, 259 00:10:49,145 --> 00:10:51,924 I think I gave it to everybody here. 260 00:10:51,948 --> 00:10:53,692 You gave it to the whole office? 261 00:10:53,716 --> 00:10:55,461 Please do not judge me right now. 262 00:10:55,485 --> 00:10:57,329 Okay, look, I'll do it, 263 00:10:57,353 --> 00:10:59,231 but you gotta promise me something in return. 264 00:10:59,255 --> 00:11:02,068 Anything you want, okay? I-I will smuggle heroin up my butt, 265 00:11:02,116 --> 00:11:03,803 I will star in a lesbian porn. 266 00:11:03,900 --> 00:11:05,271 What do you think my life is? 267 00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:06,539 I don't know, wacky? 268 00:11:07,864 --> 00:11:10,309 - Okay look, I'll be right over. - I love you, goodbye. 269 00:11:18,910 --> 00:11:21,090 Anne! Pizza's here! 270 00:11:22,326 --> 00:11:25,394 Uh, pizza, hang on, I gotta get pants! 271 00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:28,831 Hello? 272 00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:30,532 Wet pants. My pants are wet. Hang on! 273 00:11:30,556 --> 00:11:33,969 The door is open, I'm letting myself in! 274 00:11:36,095 --> 00:11:37,428 Uh... 275 00:11:39,364 --> 00:11:41,443 you're not the pizza. 276 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:44,413 Good God! What's going on here? 277 00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,215 Where's my son? 278 00:11:46,239 --> 00:11:47,883 - Bobby! Bobby! - Anne? 279 00:11:47,907 --> 00:11:49,318 - I'm coming! - Mom? 280 00:11:49,342 --> 00:11:51,609 What the hell?! 281 00:11:52,911 --> 00:11:55,257 I told you, you are not to hang out with Alice Carlson, 282 00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:57,293 and here you are at her house?! 283 00:11:57,317 --> 00:11:59,495 What is going on? 284 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:02,264 I don't approve of my son spending time with girls 285 00:12:02,288 --> 00:12:04,667 who have a reputation like your daughter. 286 00:12:04,691 --> 00:12:07,636 Mom, you're a psycho! Go back to the fabric store! 287 00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,338 Reputation? 288 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:11,540 Well, I'm not surprised you're the last to know. 289 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,042 Well, hang on, what reputation? I'm comin' out! 290 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:15,277 No! Hey! Ah! Don't move! 291 00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:16,967 What are you talking about? 292 00:12:19,171 --> 00:12:22,418 - "All Aboard Alice." - What?! 293 00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:24,586 "All Aboard Alice!" 294 00:12:24,610 --> 00:12:26,722 Your daughter's making her way through all the boys, 295 00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,846 and my son is not going to be one of them. 296 00:12:30,649 --> 00:12:32,695 Alice, what is she... 297 00:12:32,719 --> 00:12:34,797 Alice! Alice! 298 00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:36,065 No, you don't! 299 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:38,334 Lady, what is your problem? He's gay! 300 00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:40,235 - What? - Shit! 301 00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:42,471 Oh, don't pretend like I didn't tell you! 302 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,373 You just say that to be saucy. 303 00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:46,530 He just says that to be saucy. 304 00:12:47,532 --> 00:12:49,078 Alice? 305 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:51,213 Alice honey, come on. 306 00:12:51,237 --> 00:12:53,471 Please, Mom! Just leave me alone! 307 00:12:55,607 --> 00:12:57,208 Okay. 308 00:12:58,810 --> 00:13:01,212 Um, you know-you know where to find me. 309 00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:08,564 Hello? 310 00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:11,066 Large Mediterranean? 311 00:13:11,090 --> 00:13:13,624 - Hi. - Hello. 312 00:13:15,894 --> 00:13:18,540 Oh, sorry. 313 00:13:18,564 --> 00:13:20,509 Hang on a sec, I'll get... 314 00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:22,211 Do you wanna come down for the money, or? 315 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:24,301 - No. - Okay. 316 00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:30,185 Oh God. Eee! 317 00:13:30,209 --> 00:13:31,954 You are the only thing keeping them 318 00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:33,322 from killing me right now. 319 00:13:33,342 --> 00:13:34,557 There she is, the one with the cure! 320 00:13:34,560 --> 00:13:36,925 - No, no, no, do me first! - Oh boy. 321 00:13:36,949 --> 00:13:39,528 Oh God, come on, hey! Richard, calm down! 322 00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:41,230 Fuck you, and your dirty kid! 323 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:43,298 Okay?! This would never have happened at Gaze! 324 00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:45,000 Please! I have the most beautiful hair 325 00:13:45,024 --> 00:13:47,369 of anyone here. It's true, right? 326 00:13:47,393 --> 00:13:48,937 Just touch it! 327 00:13:48,961 --> 00:13:51,740 - It's all I have, please! - Just stop, Rosie. 328 00:13:51,764 --> 00:13:53,442 I have a thick thatch of chest hair 329 00:13:53,466 --> 00:13:56,779 that's basically a lice superhighway to my crotch! 330 00:13:56,803 --> 00:13:58,580 Enough! 331 00:13:58,604 --> 00:14:00,449 I have shampoo for you all! 332 00:14:00,473 --> 00:14:01,784 In my office, let's go. 333 00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:04,620 Anyone with lice, follow me, let's go! 334 00:14:04,644 --> 00:14:06,644 Get in there, you maniacs. 335 00:14:12,984 --> 00:14:14,952 Holy shit, it worked. 336 00:14:16,688 --> 00:14:19,067 - Can I come in? - Yeah. 337 00:14:19,091 --> 00:14:21,125 Yeah, of course. 338 00:14:29,601 --> 00:14:33,957 I kissed Chris Casey at that stupid party 339 00:14:33,992 --> 00:14:35,179 I threw at Kate's office. 340 00:14:37,009 --> 00:14:38,642 Okay. 341 00:14:40,145 --> 00:14:43,358 Then I got drunk. 342 00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:45,828 Yeah, I remember. 343 00:14:45,852 --> 00:14:48,586 And then I thought I kissed Chris again. 344 00:14:49,621 --> 00:14:51,834 But it wasn't Chris. 345 00:14:51,858 --> 00:14:54,069 It was Steven. 346 00:14:54,093 --> 00:14:56,360 He-he kinda looked like Chris in the dark. 347 00:14:57,696 --> 00:14:59,641 But... 348 00:14:59,665 --> 00:15:02,632 when I kissed Steven, he... 349 00:15:02,667 --> 00:15:04,580 What honey, what happened? 350 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:06,604 He orgasmed. 351 00:15:08,473 --> 00:15:11,920 What? How-how do you know that that's what happened? 352 00:15:11,944 --> 00:15:14,990 Well, he made this really gross noise, 353 00:15:15,014 --> 00:15:18,427 and then he got all mad 'cause his pants were messed up. 354 00:15:21,152 --> 00:15:24,766 And then Steven told everybody we had sex 355 00:15:24,790 --> 00:15:27,135 after I kissed Chris. 356 00:15:27,159 --> 00:15:29,505 So Chris started saying 357 00:15:29,529 --> 00:15:31,445 they were "running a train" on me. 358 00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,743 And... I hate my life. 359 00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:36,778 Oh honey, come here. Come here. 360 00:15:36,802 --> 00:15:39,236 It's okay. I'm sorry that happened to you. 361 00:15:43,308 --> 00:15:45,020 I rinsed, so I'm gonna go. 362 00:15:45,044 --> 00:15:46,889 Ah, is the-is the interview over? 363 00:15:46,913 --> 00:15:49,224 Because I feel like we didn't cover that much. 364 00:15:49,248 --> 00:15:51,460 No, I-I got your bio. I'll pull something together. 365 00:15:51,484 --> 00:15:53,629 - It was nice to meet you. - Oh, okay, it's just, um... 366 00:15:53,653 --> 00:15:55,998 - Foster! Pack your bags. - Oh! 367 00:15:56,022 --> 00:15:57,766 I talked to Tru Air. 368 00:15:57,790 --> 00:16:00,235 Apparently four hours of squash 369 00:16:00,259 --> 00:16:02,137 with a guy that puts the word "bored" 370 00:16:02,161 --> 00:16:03,772 in board member paid off. 371 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,340 They want to see us in New York this weekend. 372 00:16:05,364 --> 00:16:06,875 - What? - Yeah, I know. 373 00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:09,582 Bit of a miracle considering the colossal trash fire 374 00:16:09,617 --> 00:16:11,813 you let that ass-hat Bolinski toss them in. 375 00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:13,782 Holy shit. Thank you. 376 00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,684 But is there any way we can go on Monday? 377 00:16:15,708 --> 00:16:17,185 - I can't... - You can't what? 378 00:16:17,209 --> 00:16:19,855 Win back your biggest client? Save your business? 379 00:16:19,879 --> 00:16:21,857 Afford my salary? 380 00:16:21,881 --> 00:16:24,660 You are very expensive, but apparently worth it. 381 00:16:25,311 --> 00:16:27,184 - I'm in. - Thanks, boss. 382 00:16:28,353 --> 00:16:31,166 Well, the first time I said that out loud. 383 00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:33,302 How the tables have turned, eh? 384 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,938 Your ah, boarding pass is in your inbox. 385 00:16:35,962 --> 00:16:38,040 Thank you. 386 00:16:38,787 --> 00:16:40,609 You used to work for him, and now you're his boss? 387 00:16:41,852 --> 00:16:43,312 Uh, yeah. 388 00:16:43,927 --> 00:16:46,370 Okay, that's a story I wanna cover. 389 00:16:48,073 --> 00:16:51,386 Okay, hold on, so you do wanna keep doing the interview? 390 00:16:51,410 --> 00:16:53,488 Because like, I'm gonna be real with you, 391 00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,713 I was really excited to do this piece, but I... 392 00:16:57,719 --> 00:17:00,287 You realize I didn't build the glass ceiling, right? 393 00:17:00,322 --> 00:17:01,563 I know, I'm sorry. 394 00:17:01,587 --> 00:17:05,167 I just, I know so many capable women that can't even 395 00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:07,536 get into the lobby of a place like this. 396 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:09,504 And I wanna send the elevator down for them. 397 00:17:09,528 --> 00:17:11,773 But as you can see, I'm spending most of my time 398 00:17:11,797 --> 00:17:13,697 just trying to climb up the shaft. 399 00:17:14,699 --> 00:17:17,279 Don't-don't actually write that part down. 400 00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:20,182 You know, what do you say we give this another shot? 401 00:17:20,913 --> 00:17:24,528 Alright, come on. Hey, and while we're at it, 402 00:17:24,563 --> 00:17:26,137 maybe you could just drop the whole lice thing, 403 00:17:26,172 --> 00:17:27,119 'cause that's not interesting. 404 00:17:27,120 --> 00:17:28,120 - Not a chance. - Okay. 405 00:17:30,995 --> 00:17:32,157 Ah! 406 00:17:32,933 --> 00:17:35,672 Thank you for saving my ass. 407 00:17:39,632 --> 00:17:41,545 - Cheers. - Cheers. 408 00:17:41,569 --> 00:17:45,325 - Mm! Now it's your turn. - Mm. Mhmm. 409 00:17:45,472 --> 00:17:47,350 I need you and Nathan to help me stage a house 410 00:17:47,374 --> 00:17:49,286 - in the Annex after work. - What, tonight? 411 00:17:49,310 --> 00:17:50,154 Mhmm. 412 00:17:50,184 --> 00:17:53,824 Oh dude, I would love to, but ugh, I-I gotta tell Nathan 413 00:17:53,848 --> 00:17:55,692 that I have to cancel our trip tonight. 414 00:17:55,716 --> 00:17:58,562 What? What happened to, I scratch your back, 415 00:17:58,586 --> 00:18:00,297 and you scratch mine? 416 00:18:00,321 --> 00:18:02,999 Look, I am so close to closing. 417 00:18:03,023 --> 00:18:06,069 I just need like, a normal... not dead, not old, 418 00:18:06,093 --> 00:18:08,472 couple to help me seal the deal with these buyers. 419 00:18:08,496 --> 00:18:11,774 Please? Please? Please? 420 00:18:12,699 --> 00:18:15,234 So this is uh, this is my house. 421 00:18:15,952 --> 00:18:18,415 These days, everyone is all about this open concept thing, 422 00:18:18,439 --> 00:18:19,950 but you know what, I like rooms. 423 00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:22,419 Ugh. Agreed. I like a room, too. 424 00:18:22,443 --> 00:18:25,722 A bedroom, a bathroom, a... a great hall. 425 00:18:27,248 --> 00:18:29,047 Does this fireplace work? 426 00:18:30,283 --> 00:18:32,744 - Uh... - Hmm... 427 00:18:32,886 --> 00:18:35,599 totally, yeah, yeah, we use it all the time. 428 00:18:35,623 --> 00:18:39,336 - Really heats up the space. - Nathan built it by hand. 429 00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:40,456 Ah. 430 00:18:41,762 --> 00:18:44,040 Well, there's lots of schools in this neighborhood, 431 00:18:44,064 --> 00:18:46,176 uh, which one do your kids go to? 432 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:49,779 - Our kids? - Yeah, they-they go to um... 433 00:18:49,803 --> 00:18:51,848 The one on the corner. 434 00:18:51,872 --> 00:18:53,539 Oh, the French one? 435 00:18:54,941 --> 00:18:56,953 - Oui. - Bonjour. 436 00:18:56,977 --> 00:18:59,389 Oh yeah, okay, great. Thank you so much you, guys, 437 00:18:59,413 --> 00:19:01,124 why don't you show them upstairs, and uh... 438 00:19:01,148 --> 00:19:03,126 Right, yes, yes, yes, just right this way. 439 00:19:03,150 --> 00:19:04,295 - Where the bedrooms are! - Yeah, bedrooms. 440 00:19:04,353 --> 00:19:06,096 In fact, you know what, guys, why don't you get started 441 00:19:06,115 --> 00:19:08,632 - without us, we'll be right up. - Okay. 442 00:19:08,656 --> 00:19:10,489 - Have a nice tour. - Enjoy! 443 00:19:11,858 --> 00:19:14,271 We gotta wrap it up, or we're gonna miss our plane. 444 00:19:14,295 --> 00:19:19,142 About that, um, how do you feel about not-not going? 445 00:19:19,753 --> 00:19:20,911 What? 446 00:19:20,935 --> 00:19:23,346 Don't be upset, but I had to cancel our trip. 447 00:19:23,370 --> 00:19:25,115 How do you find the attic? 448 00:19:25,139 --> 00:19:28,785 - What?! - How do you find the attic? 449 00:19:28,809 --> 00:19:29,953 Look for the hole. 450 00:19:29,983 --> 00:19:32,622 Please don't be mad. I'm so sorry. 451 00:19:32,646 --> 00:19:34,791 Why? 452 00:19:34,815 --> 00:19:36,126 I have to go to New York tomorrow. 453 00:19:36,150 --> 00:19:37,261 - Found it! - New York? 454 00:19:37,323 --> 00:19:39,797 Yeah, it's kinda great, actually, Tru Air wants 455 00:19:39,806 --> 00:19:42,399 to have a meeting, and I think I can actually salvage this. 456 00:19:42,423 --> 00:19:44,601 - I can get them back. - Are you serious right now? 457 00:19:44,625 --> 00:19:46,469 Are these windows double-glazed? 458 00:19:46,493 --> 00:19:48,205 All the glaze you can get! 459 00:19:48,229 --> 00:19:49,240 Can we fight about this later? 460 00:19:49,257 --> 00:19:51,775 No! We agreed to start over, and now you're already 461 00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:53,177 sabotaging our relationship! 462 00:19:53,208 --> 00:19:55,412 I'm sorry we can't have sex at 30,000 feet. 463 00:19:55,452 --> 00:19:57,181 Hey, that small door in the guest house, 464 00:19:57,205 --> 00:19:59,216 - is that a crawlspace? - I don't fuckin' know! 465 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:01,118 We'll be right up. 466 00:20:01,762 --> 00:20:02,981 This isn't just about sex. 467 00:20:03,016 --> 00:20:06,028 It's about intimacy, and being friends, 468 00:20:06,063 --> 00:20:07,224 and working on this. 469 00:20:07,259 --> 00:20:09,193 And all that matters to me, okay? 470 00:20:09,217 --> 00:20:11,848 But my work is not just my job. 471 00:20:11,883 --> 00:20:13,817 I am well aware that your job is everything. 472 00:20:13,852 --> 00:20:16,666 It is putting a roof over your parents! 473 00:20:16,690 --> 00:20:18,402 It's putting a roof over Richard, 474 00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:21,138 - and burying us in debt! - If I didn't hire him, 475 00:20:21,162 --> 00:20:23,407 my business would sink, and you of all... 476 00:20:23,431 --> 00:20:26,610 you should just be amazingly grateful that I am willing 477 00:20:26,634 --> 00:20:29,513 to contribute to their house, after you... 478 00:20:29,537 --> 00:20:32,337 After I slept with Mean Nanny. Right on time! 479 00:20:32,372 --> 00:20:34,117 - I'm so sorry. - How hard do I have to work? 480 00:20:34,141 --> 00:20:36,286 How hard do I have to try, to redeem myself? 481 00:20:36,310 --> 00:20:38,188 You are so fucking dramatic, you know that? 482 00:20:38,212 --> 00:20:40,090 Thank God we are in a Victorian house, 483 00:20:40,114 --> 00:20:42,125 because I do believe I need a fainting couch! 484 00:20:42,149 --> 00:20:44,728 - Go to hell! - I am already there! 485 00:20:44,752 --> 00:20:47,564 Grr! How do I open this door?! 486 00:20:47,588 --> 00:20:50,100 Oh God, just-how does the door handle work? 487 00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:52,375 - Knob to the left. - To the left, Nathan. 488 00:20:53,761 --> 00:20:55,672 Weird house! 489 00:21:00,266 --> 00:21:01,266 Fuck! 490 00:21:02,001 --> 00:21:03,051 Sorry, Frank. 491 00:21:36,401 --> 00:21:38,155 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com