- Previously on "The Bold Type"...
- I'm glad we got stuck together today.
- He is my employee. - You like him.
- I wanted to prove to you that I can have
a healthy debate with the other side.
- That's impressive.
- You have to stop speaking for a community
that you're not really involved in.
- I can speak about that community
because I'm a lesbian.
- Do you want me to keep doing what I'm doing?
- Yes, Eva-- [gasps]
- I have a confession to make. I find you intimidating.
- We are working hard in therapy and at home
to try to communicate better.
- It's all I can think about--
starting a family with you, being a dad.
- I'm asking Richard to wait, but he's waiting
for something that I can't give him.
I think I feel relieved that I'm not having this baby.
I don't want children.
[upbeat music]
[cell phone clatters]
[Winona Oak's "He Don't Love Me"]
- There are all kinds of love.
There's forbidden love.
First love.
There's rekindled love,
which can be amazing or terrible,
depending on whether you're meant to be together.
There's complicated love where you're still trying
to figure each other out.
And then there's unconditional love,
which it sounds like you have.
♪
- I don't know.
You didn't see how mad he was.
Like, the stuff that he said, stuff that I said--
[sighs] Can't take that back.
- People say horrible things all the time.
And they find a way to move on.
You said he always comes around, right?
- I did.
- He's probably at home waiting for you right now.
♪
- I hope you're right.
♪
I'm gonna go find out.
- ♪ No, he don't love me
♪ No, he don't love me, no
♪
♪ But he don't love me, no
♪
- So any word from Marissa?
- No.
She's still pissed I said Eva's name instead of hers.
God, I feel so bad. - Ugh, I'm so sorry.
- Yeah, it kind of sucks.
She was such a freak. We had fun.
But hey, bright side, I'm about to do
that photo shoot at The Belle to launch the podcast.
- Really? That's awesome.
- Yeah. - Hey, I actually have to go.
I'm meeting Scott and his friend,
but promise me that you'll let me know
when you talk to Sutton.
She had that talk with Richard last night.
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm kind of getting worried. - Me too.
I promise. Love you.
[soft dramatic music]
♪
- Hey, Kat. - Hi.
Why is Eva here?
- Oh, we thought it'd be a great press opportunity,
you know, since Eva's your first guest
and a huge media presence already.
Is that a problem?
- No, mm-mm.
Eva can go first. I'll go after.
- Actually, I was thinking we could photograph you together.
- Together? Yeah, I don't know.
We do have very different viewpoints.
- Exactly, two women on opposite sides
face off on the first ever Belle podcast.
I think it'll really sell that "Across the Bar" part.
[Tove Lo's "Bikini Porn"]
♪
- ♪ Uh, uh
- A little closer please.
♪
- ♪ Uh, uh, I'm on bikini porn ♪
- You must be excited...
- Can we get a couple of the two of you facing each other?
- ♪ Oh, I got those marks on my body ♪
- About the podcast.
This is what you wanted, right?
- ♪ Like you're all out of luck ♪
- Are you trying to throw me off?
- ♪ Oh, you got those sad eyes for money ♪
- I'm sorry?
- On the podcast when you said you were gay.
- Oh, I am gay, Kat. - Right.
You just never mentioned it to me before.
- ♪ Skinny dipping in the pool with me ♪
- Eva, there's a piece of hair in front of your face.
If you can just move to the side please.
The other side.
♪
- It's--just let me get it.
- ♪ I'm on bikini porn, uh, uh ♪
♪ Now my bikini's gone
♪ Oh, I got you dangled around me ♪
- I'm a private person, Kat,
but that doesn't mean I'm hiding my sexuality.
- Absolutely--I'm not judging.
You should do whatever feels right for you.
- Thank you.
- Just a little confused, that's all--
why you chose the podcast to say something.
- I bring up my sexuality when it makes sense to me,
and I chose to bring it up on your podcast
because it felt relevant. - Huh.
Didn't feel relevant at the Republican mixer?
- ♪ All day, one day, today
- Are we done here?
[soft dramatic music]
- Yeah, I think we got what we need.
- Okay, great.
♪
- Sutton, hey, it's me.
Um...
I'm really worried, boo. Where you at?
Call me. I love you.
♪
- There you are.
I wanted to show you the mock-up.
- Oh.
Wow. - Pretty cool, huh?
- Yeah.
- We'll use this to tease the podcast,
then reach out to media outlets
to preview the episode.
I think this is gonna be really big, Kat.
You wanted to make a difference, and now you are.
- Hey, thank you for the opportunity.
- Don't thank me. Thank Eva.
She was the perfect first guest.
[Chloe Lilac's "High School"]
♪
- ♪ Chain-smoking your cigarettes ♪
- What was so important
that you couldn't tell me over the phone?
- Oh, I just wanted to say thank you.
You helped me get this podcast, and, um,
to answer your question, I am really excited about it.
And you didn't have to do that, but you did,
so I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate it.
- ♪ Fugazi gold chain necklace ♪
- Well, you're welcome.
- Yeah, and, I mean, like,
did we have completely different views on almost everything?
Yes, but,
I think it's okay, you know?
Like, this podcast is bigger than you or me,
and I'm not gonna let my feelings for you
get in the way of that.
- Your feelings for me?
♪
- Um...yeah.
Like, you know, the frustrations that I have
dealing with, like, differences.
- Mm-hmm. - I mean, like, viewpoints.
- Right.
Well, you didn't have to come all the way here
just to tell me that.
- Oh, no, it was on the way, so I just thought I'd swing by.
♪
- I'm glad that you're happy with your podcast.
- Yeah, yeah, I am.
I am.
Hey, also,
you could really do a lot for the queer community, you know?
- Are we really going back to this?
- No, no, no, I just mean, like,
you could use your platform to normalize queerness
in spaces where it's usually not accepted, you know, help people.
- I help people a lot, Kat.
- Well, okay.
- I just helped you, remember?
That's why you're here-- to say thank you--
unless you actually came over here just to yell at me--
- ♪ Just waiting till sunrise ♪
- Ah.
- ♪ Yeah, I could die tonight ♪
♪ The feelings you offer
- This makes no sense.
- ♪ Yeah, I could die tonight ♪
- It really doesn't, but also--
- Yeah.
♪ Sometimes, sometimes, I think I'm uncool ♪
[phone rings]
♪ Then I remember this isn't high school ♪
[upbeat pop music]
♪
- I'm about to do that photoshoot at The Belle
to launch the podcast.
- Really? That's awesome.
- Yeah.
- Hey, I actually have to go.
I'm meeting Scott and his friend
about a potential story, but promise me
that you'll let me know when you talk to Sutton.
I'm kind of getting worried. - Me too.
I promise. - Okay, all right.
♪
[clears throat]
Scott, hi. - Hi.
You must be Kim, Scott's...
- Childhood friend. - Right.
- Thank you for meeting me.
- Yeah, how can I help?
- I got fired from my job as an associate
at Bumani Investments.
- It was her dream job-- investment banking.
- [sighs] I'm so sorry.
- I was doing really well,
but the day after a company party,
everything changed.
HR said it was because we came in hung over,
but everyone was hung over.
It just--it doesn't make sense.
- You said "we." Were other people fired?
- Yes, me and two other associates,
Chloe and Alexa.
- Were all of the associates fired?
- No--Mike and Chase are still there.
[soft dramatic music]
- So it was just the women. - Exactly.
- [sighs] Wow.
And these other women,
were they also good at their jobs?
- Ivy League, crazy smart, liked by everyone.
- So it's just blatant sexism?
♪
- Think you can help? - Yeah, I could try.
♪
So all three positions were filled by men?
No, thank you. That's helpful.
Let me ask you, though.
Were any women considered for those positions?
What do you mean, "why is that relevant"?
Are you serious? Hello?
[sighs]
- So that's a no? - This is crazy.
Not being able to do what you love
because you're a woman, I just--I can't even imagine.
- Maybe you should talk to Sutton's husband.
You said he's a lawyer, right? - Yeah, he is.
I haven't really been able to get ahold of her.
They're going through a rough time right now.
- Hm, sorry to hear that. - Yeah.
You wanna talk about it?
- There's nothing to really talk about
until she gets back to me, so...
You know what would help though?
- Hm?
- Proving that Kim works for sexist pigs
and then exposing them in "Scarlet."
- [chuckles]
[punchy music]
- Are you just gonna sit there or are you coming with me?
♪
- So what's the plan? - Just follow my lead.
♪
[indistinct chatter]
Okay, I'm confused.
Kim said that all of the women were fired,
but why are there so many still working here?
- Maybe she just meant the associates.
- Let's see if that Mike guy knows anything.
Excuse me.
We're here to see Mike Johnson. - Right upstairs.
- Okay, thanks.
- Mike? - Yeah.
- Hi, do you have a second? - Until my boss yells my name.
- I'm Jane Sloan.
This is my...employee.
- Scott Coleman.
- We're from "Scarlet" magazine.
We just had a few questions about Kim Baker.
- Yeah, of course. You looking to hire her?
- Maybe, depends. - Well, you should.
Kim is awesome--hard worker, really talented,
and everyone misses having her around.
- We heard she was fired. - That wasn't her fault.
- Well, was there an incident at an office party?
We heard she was fired the next day.
- There was a party-- a lot of drinking, dancing,
and Kim's a really good dancer.
- So she was fired for being a good dancer?
- No, it's just when Kim dances,
you know, people pay attention, like...
You understand that.
- Actually, I don't. [chuckles]
Was she dancing provocatively or--
- No, it's just-- she was just having fun.
Just...
Look, a couple analysts were pretty lit that night--
maybe a little bit too enamored by
three young, attractive women dancing together.
I think management saw that and decided it was a liability--
especially post-Me Too.
- Wow. [chuckles]
So Kim was fired
to protect the men from doing something stupid?
- And what about these women here?
- Married, most with children.
They go home the first chance they get.
- [sighs]
How about we start like this?
"In the post-Me Too era, too many men
"don't trust themselves around women,
especially ones that are attractive."
- "And so, in male-dominated industries,
"we are seeing a trend of young women being eliminated
from the hiring process, starting with Kim Baker."
[exhales sharply]
[sighs]
- I think this piece is gonna be really big,
and then Kim and all those other women
who have been squeezed out of doing what they love
will finally get the recognition they deserve,
which is why we're doing this. - Mm-hmm.
- [chuckles]
Okay, should we order some dinner?
- Yes.
You really love it, don't you?
The story chase, helping people.
- Yeah, I do.
I guess you can say that writing is my first love.
- Same.
- [chuckles]
[soft dramatic music]
- When did you know that you loved to write?
♪
- I was probably, like, eight.
My dad gave me a diary,
and I filled all of the pages within a week.
It was kind of like having a best friend or something?
I don't know. That's stupid.
[laughter]
- No, it's amazing. - What about you?
When did you know? - I think around the same time.
My mom used to read to me at night,
and I ended up changing the story
and taking the characters in different directions.
Eventually we started writing stories together.
- Do you still write fiction?
- Sometimes. Just as a hobby.
- I'd love to read it sometime.
- I am kind of a nerd when it comes to fiction--
very "Lord of the Rings," fantasy.
- "Lord of the Rings" is great.
- Nice. [laughter]
- And, hey, it's what you love, right?
- Definitely.
And I love the story we're writing.
- Same.
- I still can't believe that there are men
who won't hire talented women
just because they're attracted to them.
- Well...
♪
- "Well" what? [chuckles]
- Nothing, it's just...
♪
I am not saying that it's right at all,
but...
working with someone you're attracted to is difficult.
[phone vibrating] - Are--are you saying...
- Yes.
[punchy music]
♪
- Ian.
Just one more minute,
and then we can shoot up FDR Drive.
- I think First is gonna be faster.
- Uh, I just need to talk to Oliver.
- Oh, oh, and with me. Sorry, Ian.
- That's okay. I'll just wait here.
- Okay. [phones ringing]
♪
- We're about to miss our court time,
which is something our therapist feels--
- Thinks is important--
for us to do a hobby that we can share together.
- Yeah, I'm just-- I'll get out of your hair.
- Right.
- Let's go play some tennis together.
- Great.
- Hey, so,
I'm going to be singing in a dress and a wig.
- I know what drag is, Andrew.
- Oh. - We're looking forward to it.
- Oh, right, great.
I'm glad that you and Alicia can make it.
- So 7:00. - Andrew!
- 6:30 just to be safe. Yes, Jacqueline?
- Just make sure that you hold all my calls
unless it's an emergency. - Okay.
Define emergency, maybe? - Andrew.
- Yeah, holding all your calls. No worries.
- All right. You ready?
- Are you seriously asking me that?
Come on.
- I'm just gonna leave this out
in case the kids' school calls. - Okay.
This is gonna be fun.
- How long has it been
since we've played together, ten years?
- Well, I play every week, but, you and me,
yeah, probably ten years.
- [sighs] I hope it comes back.
- It will--just as long as we work at it together.
- Mm, okay.
♪
- Just remember, up, over, and through the ball.
- Got it, got it, yep.
Ah, shoot.
- Let me just take a quick look at that grip.
- Honey, I think my grip's fine.
- Well, yeah.
It could be just a hair to the left.
Le continental grip.
That's it. Go.
- I'll try this, but this is awkward already.
- It'll be great.
- Yeah, it's already feeling weird.
I'll try it, but it feels weird already.
Okay, you know what? This isn't gonna work.
I think we just go back to my way of doing it,
and just hit the ball.
That's good. Just continue hitting.
- That's it. - Yeah, I went back to my grip.
Oh, shoot.
You're just doing it too fast now, Ian.
[soft dramatic music]
♪
I just met the nicest woman at reception,
and she gave me some really great pointers.
♪
- Really? Okay, what did she say?
- She just reminded me to follow through with my swing,
you know, and make sure that my shoulders
are following my hips, so that was great.
[sighs]
What?
- I--I don't know why
you listen to some random stranger over me.
- Are you serious?
[laughs] Okay.
I don't know why it's a big deal.
- It's a big deal because you never want me to be right.
- The therapist said we are not supposed
to use the word "never."
- [chuckles] I'm sorry.
I feel like you always--
- "Always" is another word we're not supposed to use.
- I'm a good tennis player, Jacqueline.
- I never said that you weren't.
[sighs]
I feel like...
you're being really oversensitive.
- I don't think so.
We took the FDR Drive to get here
because you said it was faster.
It wasn't, but you had to be right.
It feels as if you don't like it when I'm right.
- Okay. [scoffs] This is ridiculous.
- That's undermining,
and you're not supposed to do that either.
- Ugh.
Why is this so hard?
[sighs]
- 'Cause we've been married for a very long time
and we've gotten into some bad habits.
- Yeah, well, you're right about that.
I said you're right.
- Could I explain what I was trying to say earlier please?
- [sighs] Yes.
- You told me that you didn't feel seen by me,
so I've been doing my best to change that.
Sometimes I don't feel--
[phone ringing]
- [sighs] It's not the kids.
Go ahead.
"Sometimes you don't feel" what?
- Sometimes I don't feel heard by you.
Maybe we could spend a little time
trying to focus on that.
- Okay. [phone ringing]
Let me just put it on vibrate
so that we don't have to keep getting interrupted, okay?
Oh, it's Richard, and he's called several times,
and now he's texting that he needs--
let me just call him really quickly,
and it'll just take a second
just so I can find out if he's all right.
Hi.
Well, I'm here right now with Ian, so--
all right.
[sighs] All right.
No, no, no, no, no, I'll come.
Bye-bye.
Ian, I am so sorry, but Richard--
he really needs me right now, and I--
can we just--can we finish this at home please?
- Okay, yeah. I'll see you at home.
♪
- Thank you.
♪
[The Aces' "Daydream"]
- ♪ Daydream about me and I know ♪
♪ That you hate the nights without me ♪
♪ Baby, I hate 'em too
- I still can't believe you agreed to spend
your first night off in two weeks
watching Andrew performing drag.
- Well, I like Andrew, but also I like the idea
of you at an amateur night better.
- You know that I'm not going up there, right?
- Yeah, we'll see. The night's still young.
♪
Andrew, you are killing it.
- Dr. Alicia Golden, hello.
- You don't have to call me that.
- I will because you are way cooler than he is.
- [laughs]
- Well, for once, I agree. Drinks?
- I'd love to, but I still have to do some last touches.
Apparently, this isn't perfect yet.
I don't understand, but whatever.
- I'll get the drinks. - Hey, you got them last time.
Chardonnay? - Thank you, babe.
♪
- Hey. - How you doing?
- Really good.
I will have a Moscow mule
and a chardonnay for my girlfriend.
- You want me to have someone bring the drinks over
so you can tell that guy to get lost?
- No, she wouldn't like that.
At least, I think she wouldn't.
[indistinct chatter]
- Still trying to figure her out?
- More like my place in it.
She's a very strong, independent woman.
It's great, but it can be a little--
- Complicated. - Yeah.
- Come on, let me buy you one drink.
- I already told you. I am not interested.
- I bet you like a dirty martini.
- What I would like is for you to walk away.
- [chuckles]
- My boyfriend is sitting there.
- This guy is your boyfriend?
Don't seem to mind me sitting here.
♪
- Let's just move, okay?
- No, 'cause this guy's gonna leave.
- Uh, hey, do you hear her?
She just asked you to leave, so--
- Andrew, it's-- - No, no.
- Are you serious? - Yeah, I'm serious.
And if you don't go right now--
- You're gonna hit me with your purse?
♪
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am. Yeah, I am.
- Hey, whoa, whoa, hey, relax! Relax.
Don't get your panties in a bunch.
♪
- Way to go Carmichael!
[cheers and applause]
- Andrew, are you okay? - I'm fine.
You know, I guess when they said it was a variety show,
I didn't know they meant that kind of variety.
- Apparently.
- Um...
Wish me luck. - Mm.
- Break a leg, Andrew. - Thank you.
- Good luck.
♪
- Chardonnay. Are you okay?
♪
Cheers.
- ♪ Baby, I hate 'em too
♪ But you know, but you know, but you know ♪
♪ I'm coming back to you
- Ooh, that was fun.
- Yeah, yeah, it was.
- Are you okay? You seem a little bit off.
- No, I'm fine. - Come on now.
I guess I was just thinking about earlier.
What, that guy?
Who cares? He was such a jerk.
- Yeah, I know, I just wish I had done something more
than just stand there.
- You did more than just stand there.
You said we should leave.
- You know, I wanted to punch that guy,
but I didn't because I respect you,
and I know that we've talked about how you like
to fight your own battles. - I do.
I do, and I appreciate it.
And, honestly, what Andrew did was dumb.
That guy could have had a gun or a knife.
It was brave, but it was dumb.
- [chuckles]
Brave. - What?
- Oh, just, you said that Andrew's brave,
which means part of you liked that he hit that guy.
- Maybe a little.
- Well, I wish I would've known that.
It's just-- - Alex, it's fine.
- No, no, it's not. You don't understand.
- I'm sorry.
If you would've asked me hypothetically
what I would've wanted you to do in that situation,
I would've said nothing, but being in it
and seeing how big that guy was and him not leaving--
I guess it made me more scared than I wanted to admit.
I guess it just makes me a hypocrite.
- No, no, it doesn't make you hypocrite.
It makes you complicated and frustrating to date,
but it just makes you human.
- Yeah, well, I guess it's complicated
for both of us.
[tender music]
♪
- Bright spot. - Mm-hmm.
- At least I didn't have to get up on that stage.
- [chuckles] Good point.
[soft dramatic music]
♪
- I'm sorry.
I know how much you want this.
♪
- I am always the one to make adjustments.
[chuckles] I followed you to Paris.
- I didn't ask you to do that.
- You showed up at my father's funeral
when I had a girlfriend.
You knew exactly what you were asking.
- Wow.
- I couldn't even buy you a sewing machine
or do your laundry or pay for dinner.
God forbid you let me do anything for you.
- Hey, you're not being fair right now.
- I'm not being fair?
We got married, Sutton.
Usually, not wanting to have kids
is something you talk about before you get married.
- I didn't know that I didn't want them,
and you never said anything about it either.
- I did.
The night we had that dinner party
with Dev and Quinn and Michelle,
I said, "I want what they have."
- That was hardly a serious conversation.
- But I told you that I wanted kids.
- And I said that I wasn't ready.
- Which usually means that you will be at some point.
- We have everything that we could want.
Right now we have freedom and independence.
We could travel anywhere we want.
I'm finally exactly where I want to be in my job.
- Your job.
- What does that mean?
- We have spent so much time talking about your job.
You wanna be a stylist, then you wanna be a designer,
now you wanna be a stylist again.
- What's wrong with that?
- All we do is talk about your job--
What you want, what you need. - Are you serious?
You actually believe that? - And you don't?
You get everything you want, Sutton.
I'm just along for the ride.
- You're being an ass.
- I am not trying to be.
I'm trying to be open with you and honest.
I wanna have kids with you.
- I wanna be open and honest with you...
Which is why I'm telling you that I don't.
- [sighs]
I remember the first few nights you spent here.
You were talking about how much your career meant to you.
Thought it was so amazing how passionate you were.
-I felt the same way about you.
You were so driven. I always loved that about you.
- I wish that we could go back to those moments.
- We can.
Richard...
Nothing has changed.
I'm still the girl you fell in love with.
- I just wish your job wasn't everything.
- It's not everything. You are.
- No, I'm not.
If I was, you would've come to California with me,
but you chose work. - I didn't choose work.
I told you how I was feeling, and we compromised.
- It might have looked like a compromise,
but it was really just me adjusting again.
I knew it on our wedding night.
I knew that I was gonna be the one
who would always be adjusting.
But I loved you so much, I was okay with it.
- I wasn't ready to move in, but you asked me,
and I love you, so I adjusted.
And when you said that you wanted to go to San Francisco--
- Oh, no. You told me to go.
You bought my damn ticket.
- Yes, I did, because I support you!
That was me adjusting again!
I didn't want you to move 3,000 miles away from me.
- That was for a job that I can't do here.
- So we can adjust for your job,
but not mine 'cause yours is more important?
- I never said it's more important.
- You didn't have to.
And then you proposed. - Was that an adjustment?
Because you seemed pretty happy about it.
- I was.
But it was fast. - Not for me it wasn't.
Then again,
I was 41, you were 26,
and that is a very big difference
in maturity and perspective.
- I'm not gonna apologize for being 26.
- I'm not asking you to.
I am just saying that maybe
we are at much different stages than we thought.
- When you were 26,
you got to put your career first.
I don't think there's anything wrong
with me wanting the same thing.
- I am letting you put your career first.
I froze my sperm, remember?
Everything up until this point was good,
but now you don't want kids ever, right?
That's what you said?
So this isn't about prioritizing your career
in your 20s.
This is a life decision that you made
on your own without me about my life!
- I'm sorry.
I don't know why I feel this way
about having kids...but I do.
And I can't lie to you.
I made a vow to never lie to you.
- I want to be a father...
And you are asking me to give that up?
- I don't wanna take that away from you.
But if I have a kid, and I don't wanna raise it--
- We'll have a nanny and a night nurse,
and you can go to work whenever you want.
And I'll do the bath time, the bedtime,
the early mornings-- I'll do it all.
- That would make you happy?
- Yeah.
- I'd be a terrible mother.
- No, you wouldn't be a terrible mother.
- I'm pretty sure I would be.
- So...
Either way...
One of us loses.
[D'arcy Spiller's "Cry All Night"]
♪
- I'm just so sick of it being me.
♪
- ♪ Sleep till the afternoon
- Richard-- - I'm going to bed.
- ♪ Awake at night
♪
♪ Something is calling you
♪ To come and find it
♪ Cry all night
♪ Share a love or two in the day ♪
♪
♪ Your place is calling
♪
♪ You should be on your way
♪
♪ Wonders of dreaming world
♪ Comfort of a fire
♪
♪ Sound of the rain battering down ♪
- Hi.
♪
- I have a couple meetings. I'll be back later.
♪
- ♪ Cry all night
[phone vibrates]
♪ Share a love or two in the day ♪
♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na
♪
♪ Na, na, na, na, na, na
♪
♪ Na, na, na
♪
♪ Na, na, na, na
[melancholic pop music]
- ♪ Pictures of the old dust got me feeling older ♪
♪
♪ Just thought you should know I never wanted closure ♪
♪
♪ But you had no problem leaving ♪
♪
- You look like you could use a drink.
- Yeah.
- ♪ To feel it
♪
- Hi. Oh, my gosh.
- Thank you so much for meeting me.
- Oh, of course. What happened?
- ♪ Picking up the pieces, you just want to leave 'em ♪
♪ Killing me a little bit
- Sutton doesn't want to have kids.
- What? Is she sure?
She has her whole life ahead of her.
♪
- I don't have my whole life in front of me
to roll the dice hoping she changes her mind.
- Oh, gosh, totally get it.
- My dad wasn't the best dad.
He was detached and uninvolved, and...
I remember what that felt like.
And I wanted a chance to do it right for my kid.
I wanted to show my kid
that Hunters could be strong and open at the same time.
And I wanted to show my kid a good marriage too,
'cause my parents rarely,
if ever, opened up to each other,
and Sutton and I are-- we're the opposite of that.
At least, I thought we were.
- What are you gonna do?
- I don't know.
I was hoping, maybe, you could help me figure it out.
- ♪ I'd be your friend
- It was our first real fight.
- And you've been married four months?
That's pretty good.
- We made up for it.
It was bad.
I thought we were better than that.
- Yeah, well, love is messy,
and that's what makes it great, you know?
There isn't one right way.
There are all kinds of love--
forbidden love, first love.
- I wish I could.
[soft dramatic music]
But you know I can't tell you what is right for you.
♪
- [sighs] We didn't listen to each other.
- What do you mean?
- She knew that I wanted to have kids.
Even before we were engaged, I told her.
And she told me that she was nowhere close,
but we just swept it aside
and pretended like there wasn't a problem.
- Hm.
- But there is because I want kids,
and now I have to decide which one I want more--
kids or Sutton.
- People say horrible things all the time.
Then they find a way to move on.
You said he always comes around, right?
- Yeah, I did.
- Well, he's probably at home waiting for you right now.
- I hope you're right.
I'm gonna go find out.
[MILCK's "Ready"]
- ♪ I'm not waiting for you
♪ To come knock on my door
♪ That's what I used to do
♪ When my heart wasn't sure
♪ 'Cause I don't like feeling exposed ♪
♪ Or out of control
♪ But I want you to know
♪ I want you to know
♪ When you're ready for the freefall ♪
♪ Ready to get vulnerable
- How was Richard?
- ♪ I'm ready
♪ When you want those Sunday mornings ♪
- You were right.
I do have trouble taking advice from you.
- ♪ You're the only one makes me think ♪
♪ I'm ready
- And maybe that's because...
♪
I don't want to give up control,
and I need to work on that.
Or maybe it's because...
being wrong makes me feel...
vulnerable.
- ♪ When you're ready for the freefall ♪
- It is never because I don't respect your opinion.
♪
I wanna play tennis with you every week.
No matter what.
And if you don't feel heard, you need to tell me.
♪
- Okay.
♪
- And next month,
I wanna go on that trip to Iceland
we've been trying to go on for ten years.
- Well, you say that now, but then work gets in the way.
- It won't.
I promise.
♪
[Kathleen's "Half My Mind Ago"]
- ♪ Half my mind ago
♪ I thought I knew everything ♪
- Richard?
- ♪ There's something about how you ♪
- Sutton...
I'm so sorry. - I'm so sorry.
- ♪ Give me just a minute
♪ Let me relearn how to breathe ♪
♪
♪ Why can't you let me
♪ Go gently?
♪
♪ You're loud as an alarm clock ♪
♪ Pullin' me out of a dream
♪
♪ You fixed the game
♪ So you stopped playing
♪
♪ Just tell me
♪ What you really want
♪
♪ Oh, and I know
♪ You feel the same
♪ Half my mind ago
[phone ringing]
♪ I thought I knew everything ♪
- Do you need to get that?
- Um...
Yeah, I really do.
- Okay.
- Jane,
I didn't expect to feel this way.
I know it's not ideal,
and I probably shouldn't be saying it,
but if you feel the same way--
[phone vibrates]
- I have to take this.
♪
[phone vibrates]
- ♪ It isn't much of anything ♪
- Hi, Sutton, are you okay?
- Hey, what's going on?
- I need you.
♪
- ♪ I thought I knew everything ♪
♪
♪ How far have I come?
- Richard left me.
[sobbing]
- ♪ It isn't much of anything ♪
♪