1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:01:17,493 --> 00:01:21,706 [Bridget] Another year, a brand new diary. 4 00:01:23,499 --> 00:01:26,294 Once again I was summoned, kicking and screaming, 5 00:01:26,460 --> 00:01:28,462 to my mother's turkey curry buffet, 6 00:01:28,629 --> 00:01:32,717 where I've had some of the most shaming experiences of my life. 7 00:01:33,176 --> 00:01:35,303 - [Doorbell] - Hello, darling. 8 00:01:36,012 --> 00:01:38,431 - Lovely to see you. - [Magic Moments plays] 9 00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,725 It was, as usual, crammed full 10 00:01:40,892 --> 00:01:43,895 with some of the most dangerous perverts in the UK, 11 00:01:44,061 --> 00:01:47,106 disguised as close, personal friends of my parents. 12 00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:49,108 - Hello, Bridget. - Hello, Una. 13 00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:51,694 - Oh, no, thanks. - Love the jumper. 14 00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:55,489 - I prefer what's underneath it. - Uncle Geoffrey! 15 00:01:55,656 --> 00:01:57,867 - Hello, gorgeous. - Hello. 16 00:01:58,784 --> 00:02:01,787 - Hello, darling. - Hello, Dad. How's it going? 17 00:02:01,954 --> 00:02:03,539 I wish I was dead. 18 00:02:03,706 --> 00:02:09,378 [Bridget] But this year, there was one crucial difference. 19 00:02:13,716 --> 00:02:17,094 - Nice jumper. - My mother's taste never falters. 20 00:02:20,056 --> 00:02:22,058 Never. 21 00:02:24,852 --> 00:02:28,064 [# The Sound Of Music] 22 00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,024 [Birdsong] 23 00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:44,205 [Bridget hums along with song] 24 00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:59,762 You always wonder how it's going to work out at the end of the story. 25 00:02:59,929 --> 00:03:02,139 Maria and Captain Von Trapp, 26 00:03:02,306 --> 00:03:04,141 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, 27 00:03:04,308 --> 00:03:07,395 Mark Darcy and Bridget Jones. 28 00:03:07,562 --> 00:03:10,898 I've found my happy ending at last. 29 00:03:11,065 --> 00:03:14,986 And nothing in the world can spoil it. 30 00:03:15,820 --> 00:03:17,613 Well, almost nothing. 31 00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:20,950 [Man] Bridget Jones, what the fuck are you doing? 32 00:03:21,659 --> 00:03:26,706 - I, I can't see anywhere soft to land. - How about on your arse? 33 00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:30,293 Bridget, unless you want to get sacked at 6,000 feet, 34 00:03:30,459 --> 00:03:33,629 you will be on your way in exactly three seconds. 35 00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:36,549 Three, two, one... cue Bridget. 36 00:03:37,717 --> 00:03:39,343 Skydiving: 37 00:03:39,510 --> 00:03:43,264 A dangerous bane to the countryside and emergency services, 38 00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:46,642 or a safe and exhilarating hobby? 39 00:03:46,809 --> 00:03:50,021 Well... let's see, shall we? 40 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:52,607 Go. Jump. 41 00:03:52,773 --> 00:03:55,484 - For Christ’s sakes, go! - [Screams] 42 00:03:55,651 --> 00:03:57,820 [Shrill scream] 43 00:03:59,113 --> 00:04:02,116 - She's out. Unit Two, you got her? - [Man] We see her. 44 00:04:02,283 --> 00:04:04,994 - Bridget, open the chute. - [Bridget screams] 45 00:04:07,121 --> 00:04:09,207 - Open it. - [Bridget screams] 46 00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:12,001 Open your fucking parachute! 47 00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:14,837 [Director] Pull the thingy or you will die! 48 00:04:17,381 --> 00:04:19,634 [screams] 49 00:04:20,426 --> 00:04:21,469 Oh. 50 00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:26,307 [Bridget] Honestly, you forget just one teeny, weeny detail 51 00:04:26,474 --> 00:04:28,768 and everyone treats you like an idiot. 52 00:04:29,477 --> 00:04:34,732 # [Carly Simon] Nobody does it better 53 00:04:36,275 --> 00:04:41,948 # Makes me feel sad for the rest 54 00:04:43,574 --> 00:04:46,661 # Nobody does it 55 00:04:46,827 --> 00:04:51,415 # Half as good as you 56 00:04:51,582 --> 00:04:53,960 # Baby, baby 57 00:04:54,585 --> 00:05:02,301 # Darling, you're the best 58 00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:05,513 # Baby, you're the best... 59 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:10,059 [Bridget] Where was I? Oh, yes... Mark Darcy. 60 00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:14,897 The question is: What happens after you walk off into the sunset? 61 00:05:15,064 --> 00:05:19,110 [Director] Bridget? Earth to Bridget Sodding Jones. 62 00:05:19,277 --> 00:05:22,822 - [Pigs snort] - [Bridget screams] 63 00:05:26,534 --> 00:05:28,578 [Bridget groans] 64 00:05:30,788 --> 00:05:33,791 [Director] Bridget, you're on. You're live. 65 00:05:34,417 --> 00:05:38,504 Well, this is Bridget Jones for Sit Up Britain, 66 00:05:38,671 --> 00:05:42,133 reporting to you from a big vat of excrement. 67 00:05:42,550 --> 00:05:44,385 - [Pigs snort] - [Bridget yelps] 68 00:05:44,552 --> 00:05:48,306 - [Squelching] - Give me a close-up of the porker. 69 00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:53,019 [# Minnie Ripperton: Loving You] 70 00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:58,816 [Bridget] Who cares about the odd professional hiccup? 71 00:05:58,983 --> 00:06:01,402 I've been in a functional relationship 72 00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:04,780 with an adult male for six wonderful weeks, 73 00:06:04,947 --> 00:06:08,618 four fabulous days and seven precious hours. 74 00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:14,248 Or to put it another way, 71 ecstatic shags. 75 00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:20,213 He's given up being snooty, and I've given up smoking. 76 00:06:21,672 --> 00:06:24,592 - # Loving you... - Well, he thinks I have anyway, 77 00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,844 which is practically the same thing. 78 00:06:27,011 --> 00:06:29,263 #... a dream come true... 79 00:06:30,389 --> 00:06:32,391 [Bridget] Mark Darcy is perfect. 80 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:36,187 Not a fuckwit, alcoholic, workaholic, pervert or megalomaniac, 81 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:39,273 but total sex god and human rights lawyer. 82 00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:42,193 He is a miracle, really. 83 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:44,946 - Bridget, will you stop? - [Record scratches] 84 00:06:45,112 --> 00:06:47,782 Stop staring at me. Go and find something to do. 85 00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,742 Sorry. 86 00:06:51,994 --> 00:06:54,205 [Song starts up again] # La la la la la... 87 00:06:54,372 --> 00:06:58,209 [Bridget] So, as you can see, the incredible truth is 88 00:06:58,376 --> 00:07:01,420 the wilderness years are over. 89 00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:06,008 Bridget Jones is a love pariah no more. 90 00:07:08,302 --> 00:07:09,846 [Bell] 91 00:07:10,012 --> 00:07:12,181 Morning, Bridget. Late again. 92 00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:15,685 [Sighs] Yes. Sorry. 93 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:18,563 I was in bed with my boyfriend. 94 00:07:18,729 --> 00:07:21,107 He's a human rights lawyer, you know. 95 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,192 Yes, we know. 96 00:07:24,318 --> 00:07:28,030 I cannot believe how fantastic shagging was last night. 97 00:07:28,739 --> 00:07:30,741 Maybe I'll ring him. 98 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:32,702 No, no... 99 00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:36,956 Obviously it's important to tell one's boyfriend how nice he looks naked, 100 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:40,793 but I have crucial, Pulitzer Prize winning journalism to do. 101 00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:44,172 [Speed dialing, ringing] 102 00:07:46,674 --> 00:07:48,259 [Mark] Hello? 103 00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:51,846 It's me. Just wondered how you are. 104 00:07:52,013 --> 00:07:54,891 I'm fine, thanks. Everything all right with you? 105 00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:57,143 [Whispering] Fine, though, er... 106 00:07:57,768 --> 00:08:01,814 I've just had a rather graphic shag flashback. 107 00:08:02,398 --> 00:08:06,819 And you do have a genuinely gorgeous bottom. 108 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:08,988 Thank you. 109 00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:12,950 I'm with the Mexican ambassador, the head of Amnesty International 110 00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:16,162 and the Undersecretary for Trade and Industry. 111 00:08:17,121 --> 00:08:19,248 And you're on speakerphone. 112 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,794 Oh. Right, well... 113 00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:26,464 I'm quite busy with important stuff too... 114 00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:31,010 Bridget, we're waiting for that tape about Tom, the happy hamster. 115 00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,805 - [Mark] I'll call when I've finished. - Excellent. 116 00:08:34,972 --> 00:08:38,434 And Richard wants to see you about that crap skydiving report. 117 00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:40,853 [Whispers] Oh, fuck. 118 00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:46,317 Oh, dear. Is this the end of my career? 119 00:08:47,109 --> 00:08:49,111 No, it can't be. 120 00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:54,158 I will fight this. I am a journalist of the highest standards and integrity. 121 00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:56,118 [Tape whirs] 122 00:09:00,748 --> 00:09:05,253 [On tape] This is Bridget Jones reporting from a big vat of excrement. 123 00:09:05,419 --> 00:09:08,965 Look, I never said I could skydive and I'm terrified of heights, 124 00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:13,928 - so it was really hard to concentrate. - Be quiet. They loved it upstairs. 125 00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:17,974 Loved it. And they want us to come up with another regular spot for you. 126 00:09:18,140 --> 00:09:21,102 [Laughs] Oh, my God. That's... 127 00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:24,355 - I won't let you down, Richard. - Precisely. 128 00:09:24,522 --> 00:09:28,359 ...my friends’ motto was "When in Rome, do as many Romans as you can." 129 00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:33,447 But if your tastes are marginally more highbrow, I also have tips. 130 00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:36,534 Forget the Forum, definitely forget the Coliseum, 131 00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:39,245 no fun now they can't slaughter Christians. 132 00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:44,250 Forget the Sistine Chapel, first example of a poof interior designer gone mad... 133 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:48,921 What is Daniel Cleaver doing on the television? 134 00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:52,508 It's called The Smooth Guide. "Making culture bearable". 135 00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:57,555 ...equally serene and equally beautiful Professor Giovana Dabrache. 136 00:09:57,722 --> 00:10:00,016 Who is about to show me her diptych. 137 00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:02,351 Same old creep. [chuckles] 138 00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:04,520 Oh. Shame. 139 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:07,315 He always speaks very warmly of you. 140 00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:09,025 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 141 00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:11,777 How about we go out for a bite to eat tonight? 142 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:15,072 Oh. Can’t. I have to go out with my boyfriend. 143 00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:17,450 - He's a human rights lawyer. - I know. 144 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:19,744 I'm meeting him for a romantic supper. 145 00:10:19,911 --> 00:10:21,287 - [Mobile rings] - Oh. 146 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:24,540 - Bridget Jones. - Bridget, it's Mark. 147 00:10:24,707 --> 00:10:27,543 Oh. I was just talking about you. 148 00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:30,379 I'm running late. Do you want me to cancel? 149 00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:33,466 - Oh. No, that's fine. - Are you sure? 150 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,843 Be as late as you like. 151 00:10:37,512 --> 00:10:41,057 Chuck him, while you're not pregnant with his unwanted child. 152 00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:43,059 I only said he was working late. 153 00:10:43,226 --> 00:10:46,604 In one hour, he'll be coming in his secretary's mouth 154 00:10:46,771 --> 00:10:49,565 while he rings to say what he wants for starters. 155 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:52,860 [Bridget] Friends spend years finding you a boyfriend, 156 00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:55,029 then instantly tell you to dump him. 157 00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:58,699 Even if he isn't shagging her already, he's thinking about it. 158 00:10:58,866 --> 00:11:03,079 A man dating a woman with large breasts will bed one with small breasts. 159 00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:06,207 Rubbish. Mark's above all that nonsense. 160 00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,252 Jellyfisher alert. Jellyfisher alert. 161 00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:15,383 [Bridget] Janey Osborne. Talking to her is like swimming in a sea 162 00:11:15,550 --> 00:11:18,803 and being stung repeatedly by an enormous jellyfish. 163 00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:23,683 Bridget. How's it going with that divine man of yours? 164 00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,769 You must be so pleased to have a boyfriend at last. 165 00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:28,896 First jellyfish of the evening. 166 00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:31,399 Is he taking you to the Law Council Dinner? 167 00:11:31,566 --> 00:11:33,901 Oh. Well, I'm sure he's just forgotten. 168 00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:36,529 Better start slimming into that dress. 169 00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:41,033 He's given you the night off to cheer up your single friends. Sweet. 170 00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:46,080 Actually, he's got a big case on, trying to get everyone in Mexico out of prison. 171 00:11:46,247 --> 00:11:49,041 We're meeting for a very late romantic dinner. 172 00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:51,627 Really? That's so odd, 173 00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:55,673 'cause I saw him an hour ago going into his house with Rebecca Gillies. 174 00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:59,010 She's only 22. She's got legs up to here. 175 00:11:59,177 --> 00:12:01,512 And Daddy owns half of Australia. 176 00:12:04,015 --> 00:12:05,808 See ya, babes. 177 00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:13,399 Who is Rebecca Gillies? What's she doing going into my boyfriend's house? 178 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:16,861 Where he never asks me. And with legs up to here? 179 00:12:17,028 --> 00:12:20,823 - My legs only come up to there. - [Jude] You have fine legs. 180 00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:22,992 Climber’s legs. 181 00:12:23,159 --> 00:12:25,870 I say go over there and ask him, straight out, 182 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:29,040 are you or are you not sleeping with Rebecca Gillies? 183 00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:33,169 - [Shazzer] If he says... - I won't dignify that with an answer... 184 00:12:33,336 --> 00:12:35,338 Then you know he's shagging her. 185 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:39,842 # All that I have is all that you've given... 186 00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:44,180 [Bridget] It's all about confidence and trust. Mark would never betray me. 187 00:12:44,347 --> 00:12:47,725 Everything will be lovely and we'll have sex in the kitchen. 188 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:51,979 - Oh, God. - [Woman inside] I'm coming. 189 00:12:52,146 --> 00:12:54,649 Oh, God! What is that? 190 00:12:54,815 --> 00:12:57,360 [Woman] Two seconds, I'll be straight down. 191 00:12:57,527 --> 00:12:59,529 Who is that? 192 00:12:59,695 --> 00:13:02,365 #... I find you lied 193 00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:05,826 # And I can't believe it's true 194 00:13:06,744 --> 00:13:11,999 # Wrapped in her arms I see you across the street 195 00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,585 # I see you across the street 196 00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:21,175 # And I can't help but wonder If she knows what's going on 197 00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:27,765 # You talk of love But don't know how it feels 198 00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:32,687 # When you realize 199 00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:36,399 # You're not the only one 200 00:13:36,566 --> 00:13:38,234 [Mark] Let's get on with it. 201 00:13:38,401 --> 00:13:41,612 #... oh, you better stop 202 00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:44,198 - # Stop - # Before 203 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:47,034 # You tear me all apart 204 00:13:47,201 --> 00:13:49,245 # You better stop 205 00:13:49,412 --> 00:13:52,540 - # Stop... - You are a very demanding man. 206 00:13:52,707 --> 00:13:55,793 - #... you go and break my heart... - [Bridget yelps] 207 00:13:59,881 --> 00:14:02,967 [Chuckles] Bridget Jones. 208 00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:05,261 No, I'm Bridget Jones. 209 00:14:05,428 --> 00:14:08,264 - [Chuckles] That's what I meant. - You must be... 210 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:11,809 Rebecca Gillies. I've been so looking forward to meeting you 211 00:14:11,976 --> 00:14:15,104 - after everything Mark's told me. - Why? What's he said? 212 00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:18,399 - Where is Mark? - Actually, er... 213 00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:21,402 - [Mark] Becky, who is it? - Becky? 214 00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:24,155 - Right. - Great. 215 00:14:24,906 --> 00:14:27,074 - Right... - Bridget. 216 00:14:29,410 --> 00:14:31,412 Hello, Mark. 217 00:14:37,460 --> 00:14:39,837 [Laughs nervously] Hello... 218 00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:43,007 lawyers who work with Mark. 219 00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:45,301 [All] Good evening. 220 00:14:45,468 --> 00:14:48,554 Everything under control, I see. 221 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:51,182 Um... Excellent graph. 222 00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:55,520 - Lovely legs. - Thank you. 223 00:14:55,686 --> 00:14:57,772 [Lawyers chat] 224 00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:05,071 I am so sorry. 225 00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:08,950 I thought... Oh, I don't know what I thought. 226 00:15:09,116 --> 00:15:11,118 Now you're really angry with me. 227 00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:14,330 - No, I'm not. - It's OK, you can say if you are. 228 00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:17,917 - It's not the end of the world. - I'll get you a glass of wine. 229 00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:21,796 The thing is I ran into Janey Osborne, 230 00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:27,093 who said she'd just seen you with this girl, with really long legs, 231 00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:31,347 and Shazzer and Jude said I should get over here straightaway. 232 00:15:31,514 --> 00:15:35,351 Following the orders of the dating war command, you executed a raid. 233 00:15:35,518 --> 00:15:38,312 - You are angry. - I'm not, just disappointed. 234 00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:42,149 Disappointed? Oh, God, that's worse than angry. 235 00:15:44,402 --> 00:15:47,822 I'm just disappointed I can't take you home this instant. 236 00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:53,411 Oh. [chuckles] What about all those lawyers? 237 00:15:53,578 --> 00:15:57,748 Oh, plenty of time to butter them up at the Law Council Dinner next Friday. 238 00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:09,218 Don't want to go, do you? 239 00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:11,137 I'd love to. 240 00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:19,729 Oh, stupid Bridget, stupid friends. 241 00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:22,565 Wonderful, loyal Mark Darcy... 242 00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:26,694 ...who loves me just the way I am. 243 00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,321 [Birdsong] 244 00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:51,552 [Bridget pants] 245 00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:57,016 - [Mark] What are you doing? - Getting dressed. 246 00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:59,602 Why are you dancing around in that tent? 247 00:16:59,769 --> 00:17:05,399 [Sighs] Because I don't want you to see any of my wobbly bits. 248 00:17:05,566 --> 00:17:09,529 That's pointless, because I have a very high regard for your wobbly bits 249 00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:11,697 in all circumstances. 250 00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:13,866 - Really? - Absolutely. 251 00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:16,869 I think it's high time we had another look. 252 00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:19,997 # Yeah 253 00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:23,501 # Are you digging on me? 254 00:17:23,668 --> 00:17:25,461 # Yeah 255 00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:28,881 # I'm digging on you, now, baby 256 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:30,299 # Yeah 257 00:17:31,634 --> 00:17:33,886 # Do you want a little bit of my love? 258 00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,096 # Yeah... 259 00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:39,058 [Bridget] He really is very, very, very nice. 260 00:17:40,393 --> 00:17:42,478 # All the time I knew 261 00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:44,272 # That you loved me 262 00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:46,899 # And you promised me... 263 00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:49,151 I miss you too. 264 00:17:50,528 --> 00:17:54,365 # That you would be my only man 265 00:17:54,532 --> 00:17:55,741 # Yeah 266 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,287 # Are you digging on me? 267 00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:03,332 [Bridget] I've never been happier in my entire life. 268 00:18:03,499 --> 00:18:06,711 However, must not obsess or fantasize. 269 00:18:08,337 --> 00:18:10,339 Bridget Darcy. 270 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:12,550 Mrs. Darcy. 271 00:18:12,717 --> 00:18:14,844 Mr. and Mrs. Darcy. 272 00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:17,430 Lord and Lady Darcy. 273 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:23,227 Wonder what Mark Darcy would be like as a father. 274 00:18:23,394 --> 00:18:25,771 To his children, I mean, not to me. 275 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,858 That would be a weird, Oedipus-like thought. 276 00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:32,069 At last, life is on track. 277 00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:35,781 Bridget Jones: Fiancée, wife... 278 00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,366 mother. 279 00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:39,535 Bugger. 280 00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:43,331 [Man] Ever fancied doing it in the dark with a total stranger? 281 00:18:48,002 --> 00:18:50,588 All right, perhaps not a total stranger. 282 00:18:52,173 --> 00:18:56,260 Back off, Cleaver, or I'll report you to a sexual harassment tribunal. 283 00:18:56,427 --> 00:18:57,887 I'm a serious journalist. 284 00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:00,515 Is that your most serious skirt, Jones? 285 00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:02,225 Oh... 286 00:19:02,391 --> 00:19:04,268 Do you like it? 287 00:19:04,435 --> 00:19:06,771 I thought you hated television. 288 00:19:06,938 --> 00:19:10,233 I hate watching television. Being on it is... Hello there. 289 00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:12,401 ...entirely different. 290 00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:16,572 Daniel, thought the Madrid piece was outstanding, really original. 291 00:19:16,739 --> 00:19:20,701 Cheers, Jeremy. Appreciate that. We had to work really hard on that one. 292 00:19:20,868 --> 00:19:23,996 Tosser. Talking of which, how is Mark Darcy? 293 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:27,625 - You still...? - Yes, I am. 294 00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:30,211 And I intend to be for a very long time. 295 00:19:30,378 --> 00:19:34,090 Good. You know what a fan I am of any woman married to Mark Darcy. 296 00:19:34,257 --> 00:19:37,510 - That's not funny. - Seriously, though, Jones, 297 00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:40,471 speaking purely unselfishly, I worry about you. 298 00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:45,101 You do know that it's a fact that most lawyer's wives die of boredom? 299 00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:49,313 And what about you? Still shagging anything that moves? 300 00:19:49,856 --> 00:19:52,733 As a matter of fact, no. No shagging whatsoever. 301 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:55,111 I'm in shag therapy. 302 00:19:55,278 --> 00:19:59,448 It turns out I have a problem. I go to meetings, talk about my feelings. 303 00:19:59,615 --> 00:20:01,659 Hug people who smell. 304 00:20:01,826 --> 00:20:04,537 - I don't believe you. - I'm trying... 305 00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:06,956 ...to be a better man, Bridge, 306 00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:10,042 so that the next time a better woman comes along, 307 00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:13,254 I won't make a pig's ear of it. 308 00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:16,340 Daniel. Meeting? 309 00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:19,051 Yeah, yeah. Thanks. 310 00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:22,847 Very good hair, Jones. 311 00:20:25,183 --> 00:20:28,811 By the way, um, you're not free for dinner tonight, are you? 312 00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:32,690 No, I'm not. I'm going to the Law Council Dinner. 313 00:20:32,857 --> 00:20:35,318 It's a very important evening. 314 00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:38,237 [# Kylie Minogue: Can't Get You Out Of My Head] 315 00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:41,199 I can't wear that. 316 00:20:41,365 --> 00:20:45,578 Bridge, do you want to get married and have babies before you become barren? 317 00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:46,871 Trust me... 318 00:20:47,038 --> 00:20:50,958 [Bridget] Magda: My only grown-up friend. Married to Mark's partner. 319 00:20:51,125 --> 00:20:55,004 She actually got engaged on the night of the Law Council Dinner. 320 00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:57,173 Try it with the dress. 321 00:20:57,340 --> 00:20:58,716 Oh, my God! 322 00:20:58,883 --> 00:21:02,803 Remember, we are trying to reduce your body size by 15 per cent. 323 00:21:02,970 --> 00:21:06,307 You hold the front, I'll hold the back. One, two, three... 324 00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:08,851 [Bridget whimpers] 325 00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:11,854 - [Bridget shrieks] - What's going on in there? 326 00:21:12,855 --> 00:21:14,482 Not too bad, actually. 327 00:21:16,484 --> 00:21:18,194 Tra-la! 328 00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,404 Fantastic. 329 00:21:20,571 --> 00:21:23,825 Right, let us begin. 330 00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:28,162 I am going to make you into a princess. 331 00:21:28,329 --> 00:21:29,455 Goody. 332 00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:33,334 [Bridget] Nothing like being in the hands of a total genius. 333 00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:35,878 [Whooshing] 334 00:21:36,045 --> 00:21:37,880 Wow. 335 00:21:40,842 --> 00:21:43,803 - [Jude on phone] Whatever you do... - Bugger it. 336 00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:46,013 ...don't iron your hair. 337 00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:49,016 [Jude] It's a lot worse than I thought. 338 00:21:49,183 --> 00:21:51,269 We could flatten it with Brylcream. 339 00:21:51,435 --> 00:21:53,813 What about a wig? Lawyers love wigs. 340 00:21:53,980 --> 00:21:58,317 - I preferred you in the gold. - No, whatever you do, not the gold. 341 00:21:58,484 --> 00:22:03,281 Great. I'm late with mad hair and can barely breathe in scary knickers. 342 00:22:03,447 --> 00:22:07,034 # La la la La la la la la... 343 00:22:07,201 --> 00:22:09,745 [Bridget] Oh, God. I'm very worried. 344 00:22:09,912 --> 00:22:15,001 What if someone says "Bridget Jones, get out of here, you are ridiculous"? 345 00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:17,795 Stop it. 346 00:22:17,962 --> 00:22:22,341 The most important thing, of course, is to look absolutely wonderful 347 00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:25,178 and make a magnificent entrance. 348 00:22:25,595 --> 00:22:28,598 # I just can't get you out of my head... 349 00:22:28,764 --> 00:22:30,975 [chatter] 350 00:22:35,062 --> 00:22:37,064 [Violins] 351 00:22:37,565 --> 00:22:40,610 Hi. Sorry I'm late. 352 00:22:41,110 --> 00:22:45,114 - Hello. - I think you should go to the ladies. 353 00:22:45,281 --> 00:22:47,909 But I went before I left home. 354 00:22:48,826 --> 00:22:50,578 Trust me on this one. 355 00:22:51,329 --> 00:22:52,997 [Gasps] Oh. 356 00:22:53,164 --> 00:22:55,166 Not good. 357 00:22:56,834 --> 00:22:59,212 [Thinks] All right, tiny make-up mistake, 358 00:23:00,755 --> 00:23:04,300 but I always have wit and conversation to fall back on. 359 00:23:13,684 --> 00:23:15,436 Thank you. 360 00:23:17,438 --> 00:23:19,482 - Bridget. - Hello. 361 00:23:20,566 --> 00:23:22,860 Derek, Horatio, Camilla. 362 00:23:23,027 --> 00:23:26,239 - Horatio? - Yes, Horatio. 363 00:23:26,405 --> 00:23:30,201 Horatio was just saying he's totally against charitable giving. 364 00:23:30,368 --> 00:23:32,370 [Laughs] 365 00:23:32,995 --> 00:23:36,040 - What? - Well, obviously you don't mean it. 366 00:23:36,207 --> 00:23:40,753 Absolutely. Do you think it's helpful to give a beggar fifty pence? 367 00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:43,965 - Maybe he's just hungry. - Don't be so naive. 368 00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:48,010 The people you see outside the tube every day are there by choice. 369 00:23:48,177 --> 00:23:51,180 - End of story. - Oh, no, it's not. 370 00:23:51,347 --> 00:23:53,975 Some people have terrible personal problems, 371 00:23:54,141 --> 00:23:59,063 and other people might have lost their family in some tragic ferry disaster. 372 00:23:59,230 --> 00:24:02,900 And some people are just plain hopeless. 373 00:24:03,067 --> 00:24:07,947 Honestly, this is the sort of rubbish you'd expect from fat, balding 374 00:24:08,114 --> 00:24:14,162 Tory, Home Counties, upper-middle-class twits. 375 00:24:14,328 --> 00:24:15,454 [Music stops] 376 00:24:16,706 --> 00:24:19,584 - [Chatter resumes] - [Laughs uneasily] 377 00:24:21,878 --> 00:24:24,088 [Violins, chatter] 378 00:24:26,007 --> 00:24:28,718 [Man] Yeah, very good. Tested my resolve. 379 00:24:33,431 --> 00:24:35,057 How did I do? 380 00:24:35,224 --> 00:24:38,060 You seem to have made quite an impression. 381 00:24:38,769 --> 00:24:41,105 I've put you next to Giles Benwick. 382 00:24:41,272 --> 00:24:44,692 - Oh, I'm not sitting next to you? - No. He's terribly nice, 383 00:24:44,859 --> 00:24:48,487 but his wife's just run off with one of the partners. 384 00:24:48,654 --> 00:24:51,491 He probably won't mention it, but you should know. 385 00:24:51,657 --> 00:24:54,535 I always knew she was out of my league. 386 00:24:54,702 --> 00:25:00,833 You see, there's the high-fliers, like Annabel and Mark Darcy 387 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:05,755 and there's the gorgeous girls, like Rebecca there 388 00:25:05,922 --> 00:25:08,382 and there's the rest of us. 389 00:25:10,593 --> 00:25:13,262 Like you and me, you mean? 390 00:25:13,429 --> 00:25:15,473 Absolutely. 391 00:25:15,640 --> 00:25:18,809 I mean, look at the state of us. 392 00:25:19,685 --> 00:25:24,398 You and me stumbled into the VIP room by mistake 393 00:25:24,565 --> 00:25:28,152 and it's only a matter of moments before they show us the door. 394 00:25:31,113 --> 00:25:33,616 [Pounding] 395 00:25:34,158 --> 00:25:39,497 My lords, ladies and gentlemen, let the quiz begin. 396 00:25:40,331 --> 00:25:43,751 [Laughs] Oh, goody. I love quizzes. 397 00:25:44,460 --> 00:25:48,089 All those years of playing Trivial Pursuits are about to pay off. 398 00:25:49,507 --> 00:25:53,761 Now I want to see your hands poised over those bells. Ready? 399 00:25:53,928 --> 00:25:57,640 Here we go. What are something called "customary freeholds"? 400 00:25:57,807 --> 00:26:01,018 - [Bell] - [Man] Superior copyhold. 401 00:26:01,185 --> 00:26:02,436 [Speaker] Yes. 402 00:26:02,603 --> 00:26:05,356 What is the correct grace used in the Inner Temple 403 00:26:05,523 --> 00:26:08,985 for the second mooting night of Michaelmas term? 404 00:26:09,151 --> 00:26:13,322 - [Bell] - [Man] Amas bibendo... fructis. 405 00:26:13,489 --> 00:26:16,742 Jolly good. What is an overreaching conveyance? 406 00:26:16,909 --> 00:26:20,121 What is rack-rent? When was breach of promise abolished? 407 00:26:20,288 --> 00:26:22,331 Define "damnum sentit dominus". 408 00:26:22,498 --> 00:26:27,670 Translate "reddendo singula singulis" into Ancient Greek. 409 00:26:27,837 --> 00:26:30,047 I believe this is the answer. 410 00:26:30,214 --> 00:26:31,632 [Bell] 411 00:26:31,799 --> 00:26:35,595 Hippodamoi credemnon louestai. 412 00:26:35,761 --> 00:26:38,890 - [Speaker] Absolutely correct. - [Applause] 413 00:26:42,852 --> 00:26:46,606 [Speaker] Now, for our final and deciding round, 414 00:26:46,772 --> 00:26:50,359 the category is contemporary culture. 415 00:26:50,526 --> 00:26:52,028 [Murmuring] 416 00:26:52,195 --> 00:26:55,615 Who did the design for Princess Diana's wedding dress? 417 00:26:56,657 --> 00:26:59,160 - [Bell] - The Emmanuels. 418 00:26:59,327 --> 00:27:01,746 - Correct. - Excellent, Bridget. 419 00:27:01,913 --> 00:27:04,957 Name the character in Footballers' Wives 420 00:27:05,124 --> 00:27:10,880 who, in one memorable episode, set fire to her own breasts. 421 00:27:11,047 --> 00:27:12,423 - [Bell] - Chardonnay. 422 00:27:12,590 --> 00:27:14,592 - [Speaker] Correct. - [Applause] 423 00:27:16,594 --> 00:27:19,931 At this point, there are only two tables in contention 424 00:27:20,097 --> 00:27:22,558 and only one question left. 425 00:27:24,894 --> 00:27:28,105 What was the name of Madonna's first UK single? 426 00:27:28,272 --> 00:27:30,691 - [Bell] - [Bridget quietly] Lucky Star. 427 00:27:30,858 --> 00:27:34,070 - [Speaker] Sorry, I didn't quite hear. - Are you sure? 428 00:27:34,237 --> 00:27:37,323 - Wasn't it Holiday? - No, everyone thinks it is, 429 00:27:37,490 --> 00:27:38,699 but it's not. 430 00:27:38,866 --> 00:27:41,869 My entire life has been leading up to this very moment. 431 00:27:42,036 --> 00:27:46,207 Take that knife, slice off my head and boil it if I'm wrong. 432 00:27:47,166 --> 00:27:50,002 The correct answer is Lucky Star. 433 00:27:52,213 --> 00:27:54,549 - No. - [Groans of disappointment] 434 00:27:54,715 --> 00:27:57,510 - The correct answer is... - Is it Holiday? 435 00:27:57,677 --> 00:28:00,680 - [Speaker] Holiday, indeed, yes. - [Applause] 436 00:28:03,015 --> 00:28:07,728 [Speaker] The winners of the 42nd Annual Law Council Quiz are... 437 00:28:07,895 --> 00:28:10,064 the Legal Eagles. 438 00:28:10,231 --> 00:28:12,233 [Cheering] 439 00:28:15,945 --> 00:28:18,948 - Lovely to see you, Bridget. - Oh, thanks, Rebecca. 440 00:28:19,115 --> 00:28:21,117 Good night. 441 00:28:37,258 --> 00:28:38,718 [Horn] 442 00:28:38,885 --> 00:28:41,512 [Bridget] Why didn't you speak to me all night? 443 00:28:41,679 --> 00:28:44,015 [Mark] That's the point of those dinners. 444 00:28:44,182 --> 00:28:47,852 But you talked to Rebecca. And you talked to Horatio. 445 00:28:50,146 --> 00:28:52,231 I'll never fit in with your friends. 446 00:28:52,398 --> 00:28:56,611 Not if you go on calling everyone "balding, upper-middle-class twits". 447 00:28:56,777 --> 00:28:59,989 Well, they were balding, upper-middle-class twits. 448 00:29:00,156 --> 00:29:02,325 Except for the ones who had hair. 449 00:29:03,075 --> 00:29:06,787 I suppose you agree with them that poor people deserve to be poor? 450 00:29:06,954 --> 00:29:08,956 Don't be ridiculous. 451 00:29:09,123 --> 00:29:12,793 - So now I'm ridiculous? - Yes, tonight you were a little. 452 00:29:12,960 --> 00:29:15,421 Well, tonight you were an arrogant arse. 453 00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:20,968 I think I may have made a mistake inviting you 454 00:29:21,135 --> 00:29:23,679 and your folding underpants into my life. 455 00:29:26,599 --> 00:29:28,601 Good night. 456 00:29:32,647 --> 00:29:34,774 If you had asked me tonight, 457 00:29:35,399 --> 00:29:37,985 I'd have said no, anyway. 458 00:29:40,488 --> 00:29:42,240 Asked you what? 459 00:29:42,406 --> 00:29:45,034 - Bridget? - [Sirens nearby] 460 00:29:45,201 --> 00:29:47,203 Asked you what? 461 00:29:58,506 --> 00:30:00,883 [Bridget] Oh, God, I've done it. 462 00:30:01,050 --> 00:30:03,177 I've gone and done it. 463 00:30:03,344 --> 00:30:07,431 One minute, you're closer to someone than anyone in the whole world, 464 00:30:07,598 --> 00:30:10,685 next minute, you're never going to see them again. 465 00:30:21,779 --> 00:30:23,573 [Beeps] 466 00:30:25,867 --> 00:30:27,451 [Rings] 467 00:30:29,453 --> 00:30:33,416 [Mark] If you have a message for Mark Darcy, please speak after the tone. 468 00:30:33,583 --> 00:30:34,709 [Beep] 469 00:30:34,876 --> 00:30:39,046 Hello, it's me. I'm really, really sorry... 470 00:30:39,213 --> 00:30:40,798 [buzzer] 471 00:30:40,965 --> 00:30:43,134 Sorry, it's the door. 472 00:30:43,301 --> 00:30:46,929 Don't go away, I have something really, really important to say. 473 00:30:55,771 --> 00:30:57,064 [Buzzer] 474 00:30:57,940 --> 00:31:00,484 - Yes, who is it? - [Mark] It's me. 475 00:31:00,651 --> 00:31:03,404 - Mark. - Oh, right. 476 00:31:03,571 --> 00:31:05,781 Er, just a moment. 477 00:31:06,866 --> 00:31:08,618 I'm on the phone. 478 00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:10,786 [Alarm] 479 00:31:12,121 --> 00:31:14,332 [Laughs] You're outside. 480 00:31:15,416 --> 00:31:17,460 Look, er... 481 00:31:18,211 --> 00:31:20,213 I'll ring you later. 482 00:31:21,672 --> 00:31:25,092 Unless you've come to chuck me once and for all. 483 00:31:25,551 --> 00:31:27,553 In which case, 484 00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:31,933 bye and thank you, and... sorry. 485 00:31:32,099 --> 00:31:33,559 [Buzzer] 486 00:31:33,726 --> 00:31:35,853 Oh, God, please don't chuck me. 487 00:31:36,020 --> 00:31:38,731 If you have chucked me, please change your mind, 488 00:31:38,898 --> 00:31:40,942 I'll behave much better in future. 489 00:31:41,108 --> 00:31:43,611 - [Buzzer] - On the other hand, if you haven't, 490 00:31:43,778 --> 00:31:47,323 please behave better next time we go out. Stuck-up snob. 491 00:31:48,032 --> 00:31:49,075 [Beep] 492 00:31:54,747 --> 00:31:56,290 What do you want? 493 00:31:56,457 --> 00:31:59,418 I'd like to come up. You are, after all, my girlfriend. 494 00:31:59,585 --> 00:32:02,922 Even though I shouted at you and called you an arrogant arse? 495 00:32:03,089 --> 00:32:06,384 Unfortunately, yes. You see, the problematic thing is... 496 00:32:07,510 --> 00:32:09,512 I love you. 497 00:32:11,556 --> 00:32:12,974 W- what? 498 00:32:23,317 --> 00:32:26,904 - I said I love you. - I'm sorry, I missed that again. 499 00:32:27,071 --> 00:32:29,031 I said I love you, for God's sake! 500 00:32:29,198 --> 00:32:31,117 [All jeer] 501 00:32:34,370 --> 00:32:37,123 All right, no need to shout. 502 00:32:37,290 --> 00:32:39,333 I'll come down and let you in. 503 00:32:45,756 --> 00:32:47,592 [All cheer] 504 00:32:50,803 --> 00:32:53,389 You might be needing this in the future. 505 00:33:01,606 --> 00:33:03,691 He said he loves me. 506 00:33:03,858 --> 00:33:07,862 - [Tom] He said he loves you? - He said he loves me. 507 00:33:08,029 --> 00:33:11,949 - Right, where is he now? - [Whispers] He's in the bedroom. 508 00:33:13,159 --> 00:33:15,161 Go back in there, Bridge, 509 00:33:15,328 --> 00:33:19,540 and whatever you do, act completely nonchalant. 510 00:33:24,420 --> 00:33:27,006 Bridget, you're staring at me again. 511 00:33:27,715 --> 00:33:29,300 Sorry. 512 00:33:30,968 --> 00:33:34,305 Listen, I know this evening didn't go exactly as planned, 513 00:33:36,349 --> 00:33:40,144 but there was a very important question I wanted to ask you tonight. 514 00:33:42,146 --> 00:33:44,649 - Oh, really? - Yes. 515 00:33:45,399 --> 00:33:47,401 [Takes deep breath] 516 00:33:47,568 --> 00:33:50,947 I've actually been meaning to ask this for quite some time. 517 00:33:51,113 --> 00:33:54,992 I've just never really found the right way to put it. 518 00:33:59,539 --> 00:34:01,541 Darling Bridget... 519 00:34:04,168 --> 00:34:05,878 ...would you... 520 00:34:07,129 --> 00:34:09,715 ...like to go on a skiing mini-break? 521 00:34:14,220 --> 00:34:15,721 Yes! 522 00:34:16,305 --> 00:34:21,269 # What the world... 523 00:34:21,435 --> 00:34:23,855 [Bridget] This is not just a mini-break. 524 00:34:25,064 --> 00:34:28,317 This is a holiday in heaven. 525 00:34:30,611 --> 00:34:34,740 Told a tiny lie about being an extremely experienced skier. 526 00:34:35,741 --> 00:34:38,494 But, honestly, how hard can it be? 527 00:34:39,370 --> 00:34:41,581 - Ah. - Shall we? 528 00:34:48,212 --> 00:34:50,923 [Bridget] I know I'm going to like skiing a lot. 529 00:34:51,090 --> 00:34:53,926 Very romantic, very relaxing. 530 00:34:55,219 --> 00:34:58,139 - Bar going up. - No. What? Why? 531 00:35:01,058 --> 00:35:03,060 [Bridget whimpers] 532 00:35:03,603 --> 00:35:05,229 Um... 533 00:35:05,897 --> 00:35:07,356 Er... 534 00:35:07,523 --> 00:35:09,525 Oh. Oh, God. 535 00:35:09,692 --> 00:35:11,444 [Whimpers] 536 00:35:12,570 --> 00:35:14,363 Oh, God. Oh. 537 00:35:15,656 --> 00:35:17,450 [Groans] 538 00:35:19,452 --> 00:35:21,162 Ah. 539 00:35:30,004 --> 00:35:31,881 [Screams] 540 00:35:36,844 --> 00:35:38,638 Bridget. 541 00:35:38,804 --> 00:35:42,225 Rebecca. What are you doing here? 542 00:35:42,391 --> 00:35:45,770 - Didn't Mark tell you we were coming? - No, he didn't. 543 00:35:45,937 --> 00:35:48,105 It was me who recommended the place. 544 00:35:48,272 --> 00:35:51,025 - I've been coming since I was 11. - Really? 545 00:35:51,192 --> 00:35:52,777 [Thinks] Three whole years. 546 00:35:52,944 --> 00:35:55,154 Come on, up you get. 547 00:35:55,321 --> 00:35:57,073 Come on. 548 00:35:58,032 --> 00:36:00,368 - There you go. - Are you all right? 549 00:36:01,577 --> 00:36:03,371 Yes, fine, thanks. 550 00:36:03,538 --> 00:36:05,873 - You sure? - Why is Rebecca here? 551 00:36:06,040 --> 00:36:09,293 Oh, God. Well, I mentioned that we were coming 552 00:36:09,460 --> 00:36:13,506 and she said why didn't they come too, and I couldn't say no, could I? 553 00:36:13,673 --> 00:36:16,133 Come on, you two, let's crack on, shall we? 554 00:36:17,009 --> 00:36:20,346 Actually, I might just sit this one out. You head on. 555 00:36:20,513 --> 00:36:22,932 - See you down there. - You sure? 556 00:36:23,099 --> 00:36:25,351 Absolutely. I'll be fine in a minute. 557 00:36:25,518 --> 00:36:28,020 Right, I'll see you at base camp, then. 558 00:36:30,398 --> 00:36:34,735 [Thinks] Bastard. I can't believe he's left me. 559 00:36:38,531 --> 00:36:39,740 Ooh. 560 00:36:47,790 --> 00:36:49,333 Oooh. 561 00:37:00,052 --> 00:37:04,390 [Thinks] So, romantic getaway has turned into lawyer's reunion. 562 00:37:04,557 --> 00:37:06,058 Oooh. 563 00:37:06,225 --> 00:37:09,312 I can't believe we're already into group holidays 564 00:37:09,478 --> 00:37:12,815 after only eight weeks of total, undisturbed sex. 565 00:37:13,482 --> 00:37:15,485 Wait a minute... 566 00:37:15,651 --> 00:37:18,070 No. Eight weeks? 567 00:37:18,237 --> 00:37:20,656 It couldn't be, could it? 568 00:37:20,823 --> 00:37:22,950 Totally undisturbed... 569 00:37:23,117 --> 00:37:26,412 Oh, God. I'm pregnant. 570 00:37:26,996 --> 00:37:29,081 [Whines] 571 00:37:29,248 --> 00:37:30,958 [Screams] 572 00:37:31,125 --> 00:37:33,169 And going to die! 573 00:37:34,212 --> 00:37:36,214 [cheering] 574 00:37:39,717 --> 00:37:41,260 [Screams] 575 00:37:47,517 --> 00:37:50,645 [Screams] Oh, my God! 576 00:37:51,187 --> 00:37:52,772 I can't see! 577 00:37:52,939 --> 00:37:55,107 [Screams] Big bump! 578 00:37:55,274 --> 00:37:57,401 Get out of the way! 579 00:37:57,568 --> 00:37:59,570 [Screams] 580 00:38:00,488 --> 00:38:03,616 Who's this? An eccentric but exhilarating performance 581 00:38:03,783 --> 00:38:04,951 from a total unknown, 582 00:38:05,117 --> 00:38:08,454 who's now solidly in position for the bronze. 583 00:38:16,879 --> 00:38:18,881 - [Screams] - [Bell clangs] 584 00:38:21,968 --> 00:38:23,761 [Whines] 585 00:38:32,812 --> 00:38:36,232 I would like a pregnancy test, please. 586 00:38:36,732 --> 00:38:39,026 A pregnancy test. 587 00:38:39,402 --> 00:38:43,030 Ich bien, er, possibly... 588 00:38:43,197 --> 00:38:44,991 mit baby. 589 00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:48,035 Er... 590 00:38:48,202 --> 00:38:52,498 Kinder! I am on back... 591 00:38:52,665 --> 00:38:54,876 and he, er... 592 00:38:55,042 --> 00:38:58,880 maken ze lieben. Er, with me. 593 00:39:00,756 --> 00:39:02,175 [German] She's pregnant! 594 00:39:04,177 --> 00:39:06,429 Oh, no! No, no, not pregnant. 595 00:39:07,388 --> 00:39:09,265 [German] She's bloated. 596 00:39:09,432 --> 00:39:11,309 - Condom? - Nein. Nein, nein. 597 00:39:11,475 --> 00:39:14,437 Maybe like this, but maybe like this. 598 00:39:15,563 --> 00:39:18,274 [German] I think her problem is psychological. 599 00:39:18,441 --> 00:39:21,027 [German] There is nothing a pill can do to help her. 600 00:39:21,194 --> 00:39:23,988 I'm a girl and I met a boy. 601 00:39:24,155 --> 00:39:27,450 Fraulein, and I met frau... boy. 602 00:39:28,034 --> 00:39:32,455 And possibly now mit baby, uh-huh? 603 00:39:38,044 --> 00:39:40,463 Right, moment of truth awaits. 604 00:39:41,631 --> 00:39:43,633 What if I am pregnant? 605 00:39:44,467 --> 00:39:46,886 I must try not to get hopes up too high. 606 00:39:47,053 --> 00:39:50,139 Boyfriend and baby seems just too lucky. 607 00:39:50,306 --> 00:39:53,559 Bridget? I have been looking everywhere for you. 608 00:39:53,726 --> 00:39:57,813 I thought you'd broken a leg or something... Oh, God. 609 00:40:03,110 --> 00:40:05,863 - You're not...? - I might be. 610 00:40:07,907 --> 00:40:11,577 - What if I were? - Well, I suppose I'd... 611 00:40:12,662 --> 00:40:17,458 To be quite frank, it'd be bloody fantastic. 612 00:40:17,625 --> 00:40:20,419 I mean, if a little ahead of schedule. 613 00:40:20,586 --> 00:40:24,507 - Are you really pregnant? - Well, give it three minutes. 614 00:40:35,393 --> 00:40:39,897 - What do you fancy? Boy or a girl? - I dunno, it doesn't matter. 615 00:40:40,940 --> 00:40:44,193 Although, I suppose I've always had the fantasy of a son. 616 00:40:45,945 --> 00:40:49,365 - Another Mark Darcy. - Or maybe something like Huck. 617 00:40:49,532 --> 00:40:53,369 Or River. Or some fabulous Hebrew name like Noah. 618 00:40:53,536 --> 00:40:56,956 Anyway, I could teach him to play cricket and rugby 619 00:40:57,123 --> 00:40:59,417 and visit him at Eton on St Andrew's Day. 620 00:40:59,584 --> 00:41:00,626 Eton? 621 00:41:00,793 --> 00:41:04,922 Yes. The Darcy men have been going to Eton for five generations. 622 00:41:06,090 --> 00:41:08,801 Well, my son's not going to be sent away from home. 623 00:41:08,968 --> 00:41:13,222 Especially to some fascist institution where they stick a poker up your arse 624 00:41:13,389 --> 00:41:15,892 that you're never allowed to remove again. 625 00:41:16,893 --> 00:41:18,895 I see. 626 00:41:19,729 --> 00:41:21,898 - I didn't mean you. - No, of course not. 627 00:41:22,064 --> 00:41:25,234 So what's the alternative? Sleeping in his parents' bed, 628 00:41:25,401 --> 00:41:27,445 breastfeeding until he's a teenager 629 00:41:27,612 --> 00:41:32,158 and some progressive school, where the day is spent singing Yellow Submarine? 630 00:41:32,325 --> 00:41:33,993 Oh, you're absolutely right. 631 00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:38,456 It's madness to allow a child to enjoy his education or live with his parents. 632 00:41:38,623 --> 00:41:42,585 What is madness is to have a child if his parents can't have a discussion 633 00:41:42,752 --> 00:41:44,712 without one shouting at the other. 634 00:41:44,879 --> 00:41:46,088 It's negative. 635 00:41:46,255 --> 00:41:48,716 - That's too bad. - Yes, very sad. 636 00:42:23,751 --> 00:42:27,380 Perhaps we should go out for lunch tomorrow. Get out of the grump. 637 00:42:30,341 --> 00:42:33,970 That's a good idea in theory, but you made a family arrangement. 638 00:42:34,846 --> 00:42:37,056 Oh, God. 639 00:42:37,223 --> 00:42:38,808 [Doorbell] 640 00:42:38,975 --> 00:42:40,184 Darlings! 641 00:42:40,351 --> 00:42:43,312 I've had the fabulous idea of inviting your parents. 642 00:42:43,479 --> 00:42:46,566 [Bridget] Another one of Mother's culinary triumphs. 643 00:42:46,732 --> 00:42:50,444 - Everything in miniature. - Mini treacle tart, Admiral Darcy? 644 00:42:50,611 --> 00:42:54,657 No, no, thank you. The mini spotted dick rather finished me off. 645 00:42:54,824 --> 00:42:56,200 [Polite laughter] 646 00:42:58,077 --> 00:43:01,998 So, Mark, Bridget, when are you two lovebirds going to name the day? 647 00:43:02,665 --> 00:43:06,002 Bridget, you must want to hear those ding-dong bells. 648 00:43:12,758 --> 00:43:16,846 Well, we're certainly not thinking about that yet. Are we, Bridget? 649 00:43:17,597 --> 00:43:19,640 No. God, no. 650 00:43:19,807 --> 00:43:21,684 Of course not. 651 00:43:21,851 --> 00:43:24,312 [Mr. Jones] Good. Well, that's that sorted. 652 00:43:24,478 --> 00:43:27,106 So, Admiral, out on the high seas. How was it? 653 00:43:42,622 --> 00:43:45,666 - Did you mean that thing you said? - What thing? 654 00:43:45,833 --> 00:43:49,378 - You know what thing. - No, I don't know what thing. 655 00:43:50,296 --> 00:43:52,298 The thing thing. 656 00:43:53,132 --> 00:43:56,135 Now, let's see, there are any number of things, um... 657 00:43:56,302 --> 00:43:58,721 in an afternoon full of all sorts of things, 658 00:43:58,888 --> 00:44:00,765 so I, um... 659 00:44:00,932 --> 00:44:05,478 The thing where you said you're not, um... 660 00:44:08,356 --> 00:44:13,611 That you're not, not even thinking about, um... 661 00:44:30,127 --> 00:44:32,588 What's the matter? 662 00:44:33,297 --> 00:44:35,424 Let's get a drink. 663 00:44:43,057 --> 00:44:46,727 I'm going to go to the loo, then I'm going to come back. 664 00:44:46,894 --> 00:44:49,272 And then we're going to be civilized. 665 00:44:53,985 --> 00:44:55,361 [Telephone] 666 00:44:57,822 --> 00:45:01,033 If you have a message for Mark Darcy, speak after the tone. 667 00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:02,243 [Beep] 668 00:45:02,410 --> 00:45:04,620 Mark, it's Rebecca. Are you there? 669 00:45:06,205 --> 00:45:09,375 Obviously not. Probably still out with Bridget. 670 00:45:10,376 --> 00:45:13,838 Um... Anyway, I hope lunch with the parents went well. 671 00:45:14,005 --> 00:45:17,175 I'm sure you were dutiful and very polite, as usual. 672 00:45:17,341 --> 00:45:22,471 Er... Whatever. Anyway, look, maybe give me a ring when you get back. 673 00:45:22,638 --> 00:45:25,308 I thought I might pop round for a nightcap. 674 00:45:26,267 --> 00:45:29,770 But I suppose that's a silly idea. Bridget's probably there. 675 00:45:30,313 --> 00:45:32,565 - Sleep tight. - [Beep] 676 00:45:36,694 --> 00:45:38,988 Oh, Christ, what now? 677 00:45:39,155 --> 00:45:43,117 Are you or are you not having an affair with Rebecca Gillies? 678 00:45:43,826 --> 00:45:46,746 I won't dignify that question with an answer. 679 00:45:46,913 --> 00:45:48,706 Right. 680 00:45:49,665 --> 00:45:51,501 All I did was go to the loo. 681 00:45:52,668 --> 00:45:54,545 Bridget! 682 00:45:56,964 --> 00:45:58,674 Bridget. 683 00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:02,220 That's not your coat. 684 00:46:03,971 --> 00:46:06,182 Oh, right. 685 00:46:13,940 --> 00:46:15,942 Oh, Bridget, what are you doing? 686 00:46:16,692 --> 00:46:21,405 I read you should never date someone if you can think of three reasons not to. 687 00:46:21,572 --> 00:46:23,366 - Can you think of three? - Yes. 688 00:46:23,533 --> 00:46:27,411 - Which are? - Well, first off, I embarrass you. 689 00:46:27,578 --> 00:46:30,873 I can't ski, I can't ride, I can't speak Latin. 690 00:46:31,040 --> 00:46:34,752 My legs only come up to here and yes, I will always be a little bit fat. 691 00:46:34,919 --> 00:46:38,506 And you, you fold your underpants before you go to bed. 692 00:46:38,673 --> 00:46:42,134 - Now, hang on, that can't be a reason. - No, it's not a reason. 693 00:46:42,301 --> 00:46:44,387 But you're not perfect either. 694 00:46:44,554 --> 00:46:47,306 You look down your nose at absolutely everyone, 695 00:46:47,473 --> 00:46:52,186 and you're incapable of doing anything spontaneous or potentially affectionate. 696 00:46:52,353 --> 00:46:55,731 It feels like you're waiting to find someone in the VIP room 697 00:46:55,898 --> 00:46:58,484 who's, who's so fantastic... 698 00:46:59,277 --> 00:47:01,279 just the way she is, 699 00:47:01,445 --> 00:47:04,115 that you don't need to fix her. 700 00:47:04,282 --> 00:47:05,867 Bridget, this is mad. 701 00:47:06,033 --> 00:47:08,494 Perhaps you've already found her. 702 00:47:12,165 --> 00:47:14,458 Do you want to marry me? 703 00:47:16,586 --> 00:47:18,671 Look, I... 704 00:47:20,798 --> 00:47:23,885 You see, you can never muster the strength... 705 00:47:25,136 --> 00:47:27,471 to fight for me. 706 00:47:46,866 --> 00:47:49,202 [Bridget] I can't believe I did that. 707 00:48:25,822 --> 00:48:30,660 # What do I gotta do to make you love me? 708 00:48:33,329 --> 00:48:37,708 # What do I gotta do to make you care? 709 00:48:37,875 --> 00:48:39,669 [Dog barks] 710 00:48:40,711 --> 00:48:45,800 # What do I gotta do when lightning strikes me 711 00:48:45,967 --> 00:48:47,468 # Hmm 712 00:48:48,344 --> 00:48:52,473 # And I wake to find that you're not there? 713 00:48:55,852 --> 00:49:00,565 # What do I gotta do to make you want me? 714 00:49:01,065 --> 00:49:02,358 # Hmm 715 00:49:03,317 --> 00:49:07,738 # What do I gotta do to be heard? 716 00:49:07,905 --> 00:49:09,907 [Siren] 717 00:49:10,658 --> 00:49:16,205 # And what do I say when it's all over, babe? 718 00:49:16,372 --> 00:49:17,874 # Oooh-ooh 719 00:49:18,040 --> 00:49:22,420 # And sorry seems to be the hardest word 720 00:49:25,548 --> 00:49:29,218 # It's sad So sad 721 00:49:29,385 --> 00:49:32,930 # Why can't we talk it over, babe? 722 00:49:33,097 --> 00:49:35,641 # Always seems to me 723 00:49:36,058 --> 00:49:40,646 # When sorry seems to be 724 00:49:41,439 --> 00:49:45,818 # The hardest word # 725 00:49:49,489 --> 00:49:51,657 [Bridget] Five weeks later. 726 00:49:51,824 --> 00:49:54,702 Weight: 4,000 pounds. 727 00:49:54,869 --> 00:49:59,081 Am enjoying a relationship with two men simultaneously. 728 00:49:59,248 --> 00:50:02,585 The first is called Ben, the other, Jerry. 729 00:50:02,752 --> 00:50:06,047 Number of current boyfriends: Zero. 730 00:50:06,214 --> 00:50:08,549 Number of calls from ex-boyfriend: 731 00:50:08,716 --> 00:50:12,053 [Electronic voice] You have absolutely no messages. 732 00:50:12,220 --> 00:50:15,890 Not a single one. Not even from your mother. 733 00:50:16,599 --> 00:50:18,643 [Telephone] 734 00:50:21,771 --> 00:50:24,190 - Hello? - Hello, darling. 735 00:50:24,357 --> 00:50:28,236 - You haven't forgotten our lunch date? - [Bridget] Of course I have. 736 00:50:28,402 --> 00:50:31,489 - I'm suicidally depressed. - Don't be silly, Bridget. 737 00:50:31,656 --> 00:50:34,116 Meet me at Debenhams at twelve o'clock. 738 00:50:35,284 --> 00:50:38,371 Mum... I thought we were going to have something to eat. 739 00:50:38,538 --> 00:50:42,333 [Mum] Patience, please. I've got a big surprise for you, darling. 740 00:50:43,000 --> 00:50:46,087 - What? - Don't say "what", say "pardon". 741 00:50:48,047 --> 00:50:49,799 [Shrill] Tra-la! 742 00:50:49,966 --> 00:50:53,010 - What do you think? - Oh, my God. 743 00:50:53,177 --> 00:50:55,221 Daddy and I are getting married. 744 00:50:55,388 --> 00:50:58,182 - You're already married. - We're doing it again. 745 00:50:58,349 --> 00:51:01,686 Reaffirming our vows. You are going to be a bridesmaid, 746 00:51:01,853 --> 00:51:04,730 and absolutely everything is going to be lavender. 747 00:51:04,897 --> 00:51:07,441 And when I say everything, I mean... 748 00:51:07,984 --> 00:51:09,527 ...everything. 749 00:51:10,236 --> 00:51:11,612 [Laughs] 750 00:51:11,779 --> 00:51:14,031 Oh, God, I'm never going to get married 751 00:51:14,198 --> 00:51:16,784 and my sodding mum and dad are doing it twice. 752 00:51:16,951 --> 00:51:20,913 # No more candlelight No more romance 753 00:51:21,080 --> 00:51:24,584 - # No more small talk... - [Bridget] Bloody know-it-all. 754 00:51:26,460 --> 00:51:30,381 New York: The Big, Juicy Apple. 755 00:51:30,548 --> 00:51:34,510 The city that never sleeps with the same person two nights running. 756 00:51:34,677 --> 00:51:38,931 My favorite place in America, where Sex And The City isn't just a program, 757 00:51:39,098 --> 00:51:41,058 it's a promise. 758 00:51:42,768 --> 00:51:44,145 [Bell] 759 00:51:44,937 --> 00:51:47,106 - [Phone rings] - [Man] Morning, Rach. 760 00:51:47,273 --> 00:51:49,066 Sorry. 761 00:51:49,233 --> 00:51:52,987 Oh, cheer up, misery guts. I have good news for you. 762 00:51:53,154 --> 00:51:55,156 [Chuckles] Sure, right. 763 00:51:55,323 --> 00:51:58,409 What's the angle? I interview some rocket scientist 764 00:51:58,576 --> 00:52:01,537 while he looks through my skirt with X-ray glasses? 765 00:52:01,704 --> 00:52:03,206 No. 766 00:52:03,831 --> 00:52:05,833 Although that is a bloody good idea. 767 00:52:06,459 --> 00:52:10,505 No. The fact is The Smooth Guide is doing very well with women, 768 00:52:10,671 --> 00:52:15,176 but the network want us to cast a wider net and use a Smooth Guide-ess. 769 00:52:15,343 --> 00:52:18,554 Me? With Daniel Cleaver? 770 00:52:18,721 --> 00:52:22,600 It's the next logical step. I think Thailand is first on the list. 771 00:52:22,767 --> 00:52:25,436 No. I won't do it. 772 00:52:25,603 --> 00:52:28,397 Not now. Not in a million years from now. 773 00:52:28,564 --> 00:52:31,317 - Excuse me? - I am a top television journalist, 774 00:52:31,484 --> 00:52:33,736 not some boorish bint in a bikini. 775 00:52:33,903 --> 00:52:38,449 Really? Strong words from somebody who doesn't know where Germany is. 776 00:52:38,616 --> 00:52:40,910 - [Sniggering] - Who told you that? 777 00:52:41,077 --> 00:52:44,622 Cleaver. He said he couldn't be expected to go out with someone 778 00:52:44,872 --> 00:52:49,877 who thought Iran was David Bowie's wife, and who didn't know where Germany was. 779 00:52:50,753 --> 00:52:57,218 Daniel Cleaver is a deceitful, sexist, disgusting specimen of humanity, 780 00:52:57,385 --> 00:53:00,096 that I wouldn't share a lift with, let alone a job. 781 00:53:00,263 --> 00:53:03,933 Come on, Jones, there must have been something you liked about me. 782 00:53:04,100 --> 00:53:07,311 Well... you have a nice car. 783 00:53:08,396 --> 00:53:11,524 And quite nice manners. Outside the bedroom. 784 00:53:11,691 --> 00:53:13,734 But that's about it. 785 00:53:14,277 --> 00:53:16,904 And by the way, I know exactly where Germany is. 786 00:53:17,071 --> 00:53:20,533 The question is do you know the location of your arsehole? 787 00:53:24,620 --> 00:53:29,584 As a matter of fact, I do know the exact location of my arsehole. And hers. 788 00:53:31,002 --> 00:53:33,713 Oh, come on, Jones, it was just a silly joke. 789 00:53:33,880 --> 00:53:35,423 Not a very funny one. 790 00:53:35,590 --> 00:53:37,008 - Go on, then. - What? 791 00:53:37,175 --> 00:53:39,177 Where is it? Where is Germany? 792 00:53:39,343 --> 00:53:42,138 - Next to France. - And? 793 00:53:42,305 --> 00:53:44,640 And also Belgium... 794 00:53:44,807 --> 00:53:47,435 Poland. And it has a sea coast. 795 00:53:48,186 --> 00:53:50,605 Which sea? 796 00:53:57,695 --> 00:53:59,697 Oh, sod it. Now, look, 797 00:53:59,864 --> 00:54:02,617 I think we should talk about Finch's suggestion. 798 00:54:02,783 --> 00:54:04,869 I am going to Thailand, Jones. 799 00:54:05,036 --> 00:54:07,663 Wouldn't you like to be my little Girl Guide? 800 00:54:07,955 --> 00:54:08,915 Thailand? 801 00:54:09,081 --> 00:54:12,793 - You'll shag before you leave Heathrow. - I'll be perfectly fine. 802 00:54:12,960 --> 00:54:15,046 I'm eschewing all men. 803 00:54:15,630 --> 00:54:18,466 And cigarettes. And carbohydrates. 804 00:54:18,633 --> 00:54:21,511 - We can't possibly let you go. - On your own. 805 00:54:21,677 --> 00:54:23,679 Oh, stop it, all of you. 806 00:54:23,846 --> 00:54:26,682 I am a mature, sophisticated, professional woman 807 00:54:26,849 --> 00:54:31,604 and I'm going to Thailand entirely on my own, thank you very much. 808 00:54:31,771 --> 00:54:33,231 - [Shazzer] Fuck! - Sorry. 809 00:54:33,397 --> 00:54:35,483 - Fuckity fuck. - Sorry. 810 00:54:35,650 --> 00:54:40,238 [Pilot] And now our final passengers have joined us, we can get underway. 811 00:54:40,404 --> 00:54:42,490 Someone's gotta be last. 812 00:54:43,783 --> 00:54:46,828 - [Crunching] - [Bridget] Are we not sitting together? 813 00:54:46,994 --> 00:54:48,996 Oh, fuck. 814 00:54:51,791 --> 00:54:54,710 I don't think we're really in a position to, um... 815 00:54:55,461 --> 00:54:58,047 ...make a fuss. Sorry. Hi. 816 00:54:58,673 --> 00:55:00,967 - Sorry. - [Man chuckles] 817 00:55:02,218 --> 00:55:03,886 [Woman] What's our film? 818 00:55:04,720 --> 00:55:07,098 What's your name? Mine's Olive. 819 00:55:07,265 --> 00:55:09,267 - Er, Bridget. - [Olive chuckles] 820 00:55:09,433 --> 00:55:12,436 [Pilot] Good afternoon again, ladies and gentlemen. 821 00:55:12,603 --> 00:55:15,523 We're about to offer a wide range of duty-free items. 822 00:55:15,690 --> 00:55:18,401 Details can be found in your in-flight magazine. 823 00:55:18,568 --> 00:55:20,361 [Baby cries] 824 00:55:26,200 --> 00:55:30,413 Wonderful people, the Thais. Particularly the young ladies. 825 00:55:30,580 --> 00:55:32,582 If you know what I mean, eh? 826 00:55:32,748 --> 00:55:35,459 - Oh, for heaven's sake. - Come with me. 827 00:55:35,626 --> 00:55:37,837 Come with me now. 828 00:55:38,004 --> 00:55:40,548 - Where are we going? - Just through here. 829 00:55:40,715 --> 00:55:42,842 Thank you. This is worse than school. 830 00:55:43,009 --> 00:55:45,136 It really wasn't my fault. 831 00:55:45,303 --> 00:55:47,680 It's a fizzy drink, you know, it just... 832 00:55:47,847 --> 00:55:50,057 It just sort of fizzied over. 833 00:55:51,434 --> 00:55:54,854 Couldn’t bear to think of you back there in slum class, Jones. 834 00:55:55,021 --> 00:55:59,150 Graham, thank you. You are the best air steward I've ever come across. 835 00:55:59,317 --> 00:56:01,402 And if I may say so, the smartest. 836 00:56:01,569 --> 00:56:03,029 Thank you, sir. 837 00:56:05,907 --> 00:56:08,701 I thought you were there already, doing research. 838 00:56:08,868 --> 00:56:10,828 Fuck, no. I make it up as I go along. 839 00:56:10,995 --> 00:56:14,707 It's 13 hours for this trip. I need some in-flight entertainment. 840 00:56:14,874 --> 00:56:18,544 Why don't you tell me, in detail, about your school netball tour, 841 00:56:18,711 --> 00:56:22,215 particularly the unsavory incident in the communal showers. 842 00:56:22,381 --> 00:56:25,468 I didn't play netball. Or go to a girls' school. 843 00:56:25,635 --> 00:56:29,263 - Or have showers. - Now that's just not true, is it? 844 00:56:29,430 --> 00:56:31,432 - Let me start you off. - No. 845 00:56:31,599 --> 00:56:35,311 If you're gonna be dull, I'm going to plunge back into Mrs. Dalloway, 846 00:56:35,478 --> 00:56:38,689 and you know how she loves that. Dirty, dirty bitch. 847 00:57:00,378 --> 00:57:02,672 - [Elephant trumpets] - # Here's a new thing 848 00:57:02,839 --> 00:57:04,507 # That's gonna please ya 849 00:57:04,674 --> 00:57:07,176 # Just a little town down in Indonesia 850 00:57:07,385 --> 00:57:08,469 # Bangkok... 851 00:57:08,636 --> 00:57:11,472 [Bridget] Arrived Bangkok. Very hot. 852 00:57:11,639 --> 00:57:15,643 Relieved at last to throw myself into serious journalistic work. 853 00:57:17,687 --> 00:57:21,858 Thailand has long called travelers from around the globe 854 00:57:22,024 --> 00:57:25,695 to take spiritual succour and karmic rest. 855 00:57:25,862 --> 00:57:30,992 For centuries, Western visitors have been inevitably drawn 856 00:57:31,159 --> 00:57:34,537 to some of Bangkok's oldest sanctuaries. 857 00:57:34,704 --> 00:57:38,291 So true, Bridget. Even I, fight it as I may, am no exception. 858 00:57:38,457 --> 00:57:42,587 The moment I arrive here, I almost feel an irresistible pull... 859 00:57:42,753 --> 00:57:46,507 ...to this. The Temple of Tranquility. 860 00:57:47,216 --> 00:57:52,263 Indeed, nothing symbolizes Thailand's extraordinary fusion of East and West, 861 00:57:52,430 --> 00:57:55,850 of tradition and innovation, better than this. 862 00:57:56,017 --> 00:57:58,269 Fully body-to-body massage. 863 00:57:58,436 --> 00:58:00,855 - Sawatdee kha? - Sawatdee khrab? 864 00:58:01,022 --> 00:58:05,443 An incredible thing about Thailand is the amazing traditional cuisine. 865 00:58:05,610 --> 00:58:09,655 I'm going to taste kapaluk, the ultimate delicacy. 866 00:58:11,532 --> 00:58:13,868 Oh, fuck! Oh, fuck! 867 00:58:14,035 --> 00:58:16,037 Oh, my God. My God. 868 00:58:16,204 --> 00:58:18,748 Um... Er... Mmm. 869 00:58:18,915 --> 00:58:21,417 How about a lovely locust? 870 00:58:21,584 --> 00:58:23,753 I can't. No, no, I can't. 871 00:58:23,920 --> 00:58:25,963 - They're delicious. - [Crunching] 872 00:58:28,299 --> 00:58:29,717 Oh! 873 00:58:32,678 --> 00:58:37,850 [Daniel] Now that is Ko Panyi, which is the setting for a very famous Thai poem, 874 00:58:38,017 --> 00:58:40,353 which I think you'd like very much, Jones. 875 00:58:40,520 --> 00:58:44,732 It's all about a badly-behaved prince who finds true love with a beautiful, 876 00:58:44,899 --> 00:58:48,110 and as it happens, very slightly overweight princess. 877 00:58:48,861 --> 00:58:52,448 - You're teasing me. - I never tease about poetry. 878 00:58:53,199 --> 00:58:57,078 "Oh, Suvarnamali Why can you not see that I adore you?" 879 00:58:57,245 --> 00:58:59,664 "Why do you avoid and scorn me?" 880 00:58:59,831 --> 00:59:01,833 "If you cast me off and leave me 881 00:59:01,999 --> 00:59:04,210 How should I live another day?" 882 00:59:07,213 --> 00:59:11,509 And you thought all I knew of Thailand was pussies and ping-pong balls. 883 00:59:11,676 --> 00:59:14,720 - You wouldn't sleep with him? - No, of course not. 884 00:59:14,887 --> 00:59:17,265 Absolutely not. 885 00:59:17,431 --> 00:59:19,517 But he is clever. 886 00:59:19,684 --> 00:59:21,227 - Yes? - And handsome. 887 00:59:21,394 --> 00:59:24,939 He's also a dysfunctional, fucked-up, middle-aged, lost boy. 888 00:59:25,106 --> 00:59:27,108 Well, no-one's perfect. 889 00:59:27,275 --> 00:59:28,901 [Birdsong] 890 00:59:32,071 --> 00:59:34,448 I didn't realize you were busy. 891 00:59:38,369 --> 00:59:42,081 - He's young enough to be your grandson. - I know. Isn't that great? 892 00:59:43,166 --> 00:59:45,376 - [Man yells] - [Ladies shriek] 893 00:59:45,543 --> 00:59:49,547 Come on, guys, I've got a very special treat lined up for lunch. 894 00:59:49,714 --> 00:59:52,091 [Bridget] I'm getting rather fond of Jed, 895 00:59:52,258 --> 00:59:55,636 and I must say he has a genuine interest in Thai cuisine. 896 00:59:55,803 --> 00:59:59,724 [Bridget] I wouldn't have thought omelet would be big in Thailand. 897 00:59:59,891 --> 01:00:03,519 - Or mushrooms, for that matter. - [Jed] It's magic. 898 01:00:06,397 --> 01:00:09,400 It is a magic mushroom omelet, isn't it? 899 01:00:09,984 --> 01:00:14,572 Well, that's awful. There is nothing funny in this at all. 900 01:00:16,741 --> 01:00:18,743 Although, thank God, 901 01:00:19,368 --> 01:00:22,288 the mushrooms don't actually seem to be working. 902 01:00:25,249 --> 01:00:27,126 [# Primal Scream: Loaded] 903 01:00:28,044 --> 01:00:30,254 # Just what is it that you want to do? 904 01:00:31,547 --> 01:00:35,676 Such lovely colors! [gasps] 905 01:00:35,843 --> 01:00:38,846 # We wanna get loaded And we wanna have a good time... 906 01:00:39,013 --> 01:00:43,768 Beautiful Bridget! Beautiful Bridget! Beautiful Bridget! 907 01:00:46,437 --> 01:00:48,356 Bridget Jones! 908 01:00:51,150 --> 01:00:53,653 [Daniel's voice, distorted] Bridget Jones! 909 01:00:53,820 --> 01:00:55,530 But, wait... 910 01:00:55,696 --> 01:00:59,033 - [Daniel, distorted] Bridget Jones? - What sound is that? 911 01:01:04,664 --> 01:01:07,875 It is Daniel Cleaver. [echoes] 912 01:01:08,042 --> 01:01:11,963 [Thinks] How unutterably beautiful he is. 913 01:01:13,464 --> 01:01:15,967 Jones, what the hell are you doing? 914 01:01:19,512 --> 01:01:22,348 [Bridget] You are lovely colors. 915 01:01:23,307 --> 01:01:26,060 - # I don't wanna lose your love... - Here. 916 01:01:26,227 --> 01:01:28,312 Here I am. 917 01:01:29,147 --> 01:01:31,649 I think you're completely off your face. 918 01:01:33,025 --> 01:01:34,902 - Hey. - [Bridget groans] 919 01:01:35,069 --> 01:01:38,114 - Bloody hell. - [Bridget groans and sighs] 920 01:01:38,656 --> 01:01:41,701 Oh... Oh, I'm an angel. 921 01:01:42,660 --> 01:01:45,538 Oh. How lovely. 922 01:01:45,705 --> 01:01:48,082 Glorious sand. 923 01:01:48,249 --> 01:01:50,042 Oh. 924 01:01:50,209 --> 01:01:52,420 I want to be naked. 925 01:01:53,004 --> 01:01:57,383 - Naked as a baby. - Come on, then, angel. Up you get. 926 01:01:57,550 --> 01:01:59,552 [Daniel strains] 927 01:02:00,636 --> 01:02:02,638 - All right? - Mmm. 928 01:02:03,723 --> 01:02:07,226 - [Daniel] How are you feeling? - Completely embarrassed. 929 01:02:07,393 --> 01:02:10,771 Don't be. You're charming on drugs. In future, just say yes. 930 01:02:11,606 --> 01:02:16,777 Do you know, I never really understood why you wanted to go out with me. 931 01:02:17,653 --> 01:02:20,615 - It seemed so unlikely. - Come on. For God's sake. 932 01:02:20,781 --> 01:02:23,743 You're sexy. You make me laugh. 933 01:02:23,910 --> 01:02:26,329 At you, of course, not with you. 934 01:02:26,996 --> 01:02:29,040 And you were... 935 01:02:29,207 --> 01:02:31,000 ...incidentally... 936 01:02:32,710 --> 01:02:34,504 ...the best shag... 937 01:02:34,670 --> 01:02:36,297 ...I ever had. 938 01:02:36,464 --> 01:02:38,049 The best? 939 01:02:38,216 --> 01:02:41,552 Aside from Simon Reade in the fifth-form locker room, yeah. 940 01:02:42,553 --> 01:02:45,097 Suppose I said you were pretty good too? 941 01:02:47,183 --> 01:02:49,268 Pretty good? 942 01:02:50,353 --> 01:02:52,730 Was I better than Mark Darcy? 943 01:02:53,856 --> 01:02:58,277 By the way, is it true he always says "I'm sorry, I think I'm going to come"? 944 01:02:58,444 --> 01:03:01,447 - Who told you that? - It's common knowledge, isn't it? 945 01:03:02,698 --> 01:03:05,535 Come on, Jones. Who gave who the hoof? 946 01:03:05,701 --> 01:03:07,829 And why? 947 01:03:08,996 --> 01:03:11,040 Let's just say 948 01:03:11,207 --> 01:03:14,502 that we suffered from a fatal incompatibility. 949 01:03:18,214 --> 01:03:20,424 I have missed you, Jones. 950 01:03:20,591 --> 01:03:23,344 I don't suppose there's any circumstances 951 01:03:23,511 --> 01:03:25,888 in which you would ever consider 952 01:03:26,055 --> 01:03:28,850 thinking about trusting me again? 953 01:03:31,519 --> 01:03:33,521 Absolutely not. 954 01:03:40,027 --> 01:03:43,656 Well, I suppose I'll be getting back to my little hut now. 955 01:03:44,407 --> 01:03:47,994 Thank you very much, Daniel. I had a nice time. 956 01:03:59,547 --> 01:04:04,010 Is that the Big Dipper or the little one? 957 01:04:04,177 --> 01:04:06,387 I can never tell them apart. 958 01:04:06,554 --> 01:04:08,306 Definitely the big one. 959 01:04:08,472 --> 01:04:11,517 You can't see the little one this close to the equator. 960 01:04:11,684 --> 01:04:15,354 Oh, please. You don't know about astronomy. 961 01:04:15,521 --> 01:04:18,065 I most certainly do. I'm passionate about it. 962 01:04:20,443 --> 01:04:24,322 You know, Jones, if stargazing is something that interests you, 963 01:04:24,489 --> 01:04:28,576 then it has to be said that the view from my balcony is quite outstanding. 964 01:04:29,911 --> 01:04:32,872 Perhaps you'd like to come up and have a little look? 965 01:04:33,039 --> 01:04:34,916 I don't think so. 966 01:04:35,082 --> 01:04:38,252 See over there? Along my arm. 967 01:04:38,419 --> 01:04:40,463 That's it, over there. 968 01:04:41,464 --> 01:04:43,799 That is Orion's Belt. 969 01:04:43,966 --> 01:04:49,263 And next to that is a very sexy little constellation called Ursa's Maiden. 970 01:04:49,430 --> 01:04:50,473 Ah. 971 01:04:50,640 --> 01:04:54,018 She's being very naughty and trying to undo Orion's belt. 972 01:04:55,019 --> 01:04:59,106 All right, what about... that one? 973 01:05:00,107 --> 01:05:03,236 Yes, well that is a very, very famous star. 974 01:05:03,402 --> 01:05:05,780 Um, right next to, of course, um... 975 01:05:05,947 --> 01:05:07,156 [chirruping] 976 01:05:07,990 --> 01:05:12,411 I don't know, some other fucking star that's been there for years and years. 977 01:05:12,578 --> 01:05:15,915 Seen one star, you've seen the lot, that's what I say, Jones. 978 01:05:19,460 --> 01:05:21,754 Different with girls, though. 979 01:05:23,840 --> 01:05:25,842 Some girls... 980 01:05:26,008 --> 01:05:28,010 ...are special. 981 01:05:28,177 --> 01:05:30,304 Are they? 982 01:05:31,180 --> 01:05:33,182 I think so. 983 01:05:33,349 --> 01:05:35,768 [# 10cc: I'm Not In Love] 984 01:05:44,026 --> 01:05:47,238 What is this special power you hold over me, Jones? 985 01:05:56,747 --> 01:05:58,958 And what about your therapy? 986 01:06:00,751 --> 01:06:02,837 I think you might be it. 987 01:06:03,004 --> 01:06:05,131 # I'm not in love 988 01:06:06,465 --> 01:06:08,467 # So don't forget it 989 01:06:09,969 --> 01:06:12,221 # It's just a silly phase 990 01:06:12,388 --> 01:06:14,390 # I'm going through 991 01:06:17,018 --> 01:06:19,061 # And just because 992 01:06:20,730 --> 01:06:22,732 # I call you up 993 01:06:24,233 --> 01:06:25,985 # Don't get me wrong 994 01:06:26,152 --> 01:06:29,113 # Don't think you've got it made 995 01:06:31,324 --> 01:06:33,326 # I'm not in love... 996 01:06:34,035 --> 01:06:36,871 God, I hope you're wearing those giant panties. 997 01:06:37,038 --> 01:06:38,206 Please. 998 01:06:38,372 --> 01:06:41,334 [Smooching] Please be wearing the giant panties. 999 01:06:41,501 --> 01:06:43,586 Please. [gasps] 1000 01:06:43,753 --> 01:06:45,838 Oh, my old friends. 1001 01:06:46,005 --> 01:06:48,758 Oh, Daddy's home. 1002 01:06:48,925 --> 01:06:52,762 Did you miss me? Because Daddy missed you. Yes, he did. 1003 01:06:53,554 --> 01:06:55,139 Wait. 1004 01:06:57,558 --> 01:06:59,143 Sorry. 1005 01:06:59,310 --> 01:07:01,479 Can I just have a minute? 1006 01:07:01,646 --> 01:07:03,648 Just a minute. 1007 01:07:11,322 --> 01:07:13,825 [Thinks] Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. 1008 01:07:13,991 --> 01:07:17,745 # Big boys don't cry Big boys don't cry 1009 01:07:18,246 --> 01:07:21,833 # Big boys don't cry Big boys don't cry... 1010 01:07:32,176 --> 01:07:34,053 [sighs] 1011 01:07:35,096 --> 01:07:38,850 - Everything all right? - Yeah, sure. 1012 01:07:39,892 --> 01:07:42,019 Just a bit... nervous. [chuckles] 1013 01:07:43,271 --> 01:07:46,023 I mean, you see, if I stay with you tonight, 1014 01:07:46,190 --> 01:07:50,319 well, it's definitely the end of something... 1015 01:07:50,486 --> 01:07:52,697 important with someone. 1016 01:07:52,864 --> 01:07:55,616 Um, which has probably ended already, 1017 01:07:55,783 --> 01:07:58,744 - but perhaps... - Bridge, Bridge Bridge, Bridge. 1018 01:07:58,911 --> 01:08:01,330 Doesn't everyone deserve a second chance? 1019 01:08:03,332 --> 01:08:04,750 Hmm? 1020 01:08:11,424 --> 01:08:13,259 Except Hitler. 1021 01:08:14,927 --> 01:08:18,222 Well, he was very, very, very naughty. 1022 01:08:20,099 --> 01:08:21,601 [Knocking] 1023 01:08:24,437 --> 01:08:25,813 What? 1024 01:08:25,980 --> 01:08:29,525 Nothing. Er, come back later, please. Thank you very much. 1025 01:08:30,735 --> 01:08:32,361 [Knocking] 1026 01:08:33,571 --> 01:08:36,032 Bridge, it's nothing. Leave it. Leave it. 1027 01:08:38,743 --> 01:08:41,329 You made order for 10.30. 1028 01:08:42,288 --> 01:08:44,332 Order for what? 1029 01:08:45,374 --> 01:08:46,792 Me. 1030 01:08:46,959 --> 01:08:48,711 10.30. 1031 01:08:51,839 --> 01:08:54,509 You know, I've had it up to here with this hotel. 1032 01:08:54,675 --> 01:08:58,513 - It's been cock-ups like this all week. - [Thai girl] You Mr. Cleaver? 1033 01:08:58,679 --> 01:09:03,184 Yesterday, you with Maria. She say you big tipper. 1034 01:09:11,984 --> 01:09:13,945 [Mumbles] 1035 01:09:14,111 --> 01:09:16,697 I mean, I'm up for it if you are. 1036 01:09:17,824 --> 01:09:21,327 Actually, no, that was stupid. It's just one little slip. 1037 01:09:21,494 --> 01:09:25,164 Don't let it ruin what was gonna be a fantastic weekend shagathon. 1038 01:09:25,331 --> 01:09:28,543 - I don't want a shagathon. - No, nor do I. Nor do I. 1039 01:09:28,709 --> 01:09:31,838 - You're right. - You're looking for a weekend of sex, 1040 01:09:32,004 --> 01:09:35,216 - I'm looking... - For more. I feel I can change. 1041 01:09:35,383 --> 01:09:37,885 - I absolutely can change. - I need to change. 1042 01:09:38,052 --> 01:09:40,263 I can't believe I fell for it again. 1043 01:09:40,429 --> 01:09:43,224 Daniel, I really do think 1044 01:09:43,391 --> 01:09:46,185 that you should go and fuck yourself. 1045 01:09:46,352 --> 01:09:50,231 Or her. But definitely not me. 1046 01:09:50,398 --> 01:09:51,941 - # Think - # Think 1047 01:09:52,108 --> 01:09:54,527 # Think about what you're trying to do to me 1048 01:09:54,694 --> 01:09:56,279 - # Think - # Think think 1049 01:09:56,445 --> 01:09:57,655 # Let your mind go... 1050 01:09:57,822 --> 01:10:00,491 I can't believe he made up the sex therapy thing. 1051 01:10:00,658 --> 01:10:03,119 Doesn't matter. I finally learnt my lesson, 1052 01:10:03,286 --> 01:10:06,080 and it's an excellent lesson to have nailed. 1053 01:10:06,747 --> 01:10:08,332 - Fuck! - What? 1054 01:10:08,499 --> 01:10:10,877 No fucking room in the fucking suitcase. 1055 01:10:11,043 --> 01:10:13,462 There's room in mine. Give me something. 1056 01:10:13,629 --> 01:10:15,423 Great. 1057 01:10:15,590 --> 01:10:19,051 - What the hell is this? - It is a fertility-snake bowl. 1058 01:10:19,218 --> 01:10:21,637 - Ooh. - Jed gave it to me. 1059 01:10:21,804 --> 01:10:23,806 - # Think think - # Let your mind go... 1060 01:10:23,973 --> 01:10:25,391 How romantic. 1061 01:10:25,558 --> 01:10:26,726 # Freedom... 1062 01:10:26,893 --> 01:10:31,105 The way I look at it, in everyone's life, there's a certain amount of shit. 1063 01:10:31,272 --> 01:10:33,816 - That's true. - In the last year, 1064 01:10:33,983 --> 01:10:36,486 things have turned out pretty shitty. 1065 01:10:36,652 --> 01:10:38,821 So logically, mathematically, even, 1066 01:10:38,988 --> 01:10:41,949 it's got to be time for something not shit. 1067 01:10:42,116 --> 01:10:46,913 - [Shazzer] Like what? - Maybe Mark will have chucked Rebecca. 1068 01:10:47,079 --> 01:10:49,499 And he'll run to my door, 1069 01:10:49,665 --> 01:10:53,961 fall to his knees, possibly wearing a wet white shirt, 1070 01:10:54,128 --> 01:10:56,005 and beg me to come back. 1071 01:10:56,172 --> 01:10:57,423 - # Think - # Think 1072 01:10:57,590 --> 01:11:00,426 # Think about what you're tryin' to do to me... 1073 01:11:00,593 --> 01:11:06,140 Yes, I very confidently expect very, very good times ahead. 1074 01:11:06,307 --> 01:11:08,976 [PA] Final call for all passengers to London... 1075 01:11:09,143 --> 01:11:12,146 Isn't he cute? Hello. 1076 01:11:12,647 --> 01:11:14,232 Hello. Oh... 1077 01:11:14,398 --> 01:11:17,401 Seems to be getting a bit excited. [Laughs] 1078 01:11:18,027 --> 01:11:19,570 Oh. 1079 01:11:19,737 --> 01:11:21,197 Er... 1080 01:11:22,532 --> 01:11:25,785 - [Shazzer] Bridget! - It's just a misunderstanding. 1081 01:11:25,952 --> 01:11:27,662 Hold the plane. 1082 01:11:27,829 --> 01:11:29,664 Hold the plane. 1083 01:11:29,831 --> 01:11:31,958 [Shazzer] Excuse me! Excuse me! 1084 01:11:32,124 --> 01:11:36,963 [PA] All remaining passengers please report to Gate 27 immediately. 1085 01:11:43,427 --> 01:11:44,846 [Thud] 1086 01:11:45,012 --> 01:11:47,014 It's not mine. 1087 01:11:47,181 --> 01:11:49,642 - These yours? - Yes. 1088 01:11:49,809 --> 01:11:52,019 I mean, they're not my favorite pair. 1089 01:11:53,604 --> 01:11:55,398 [Siren] 1090 01:12:00,903 --> 01:12:02,280 [Brakes screech] 1091 01:12:04,532 --> 01:12:06,576 You can't do this. I'm English. 1092 01:12:06,742 --> 01:12:08,953 And an award-winning journalist. 1093 01:12:09,120 --> 01:12:13,624 Well, maybe not award-winning, but I have been to lots of award ceremonies. 1094 01:12:13,791 --> 01:12:15,793 [Door rattles and clangs] 1095 01:12:20,256 --> 01:12:21,799 [Clang] 1096 01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:25,761 Hello. Bridget Jones. 1097 01:12:28,347 --> 01:12:30,516 Lovely to meet all of you. 1098 01:12:32,727 --> 01:12:35,188 [Bridget] Oh, my bloody God and fuck. 1099 01:12:35,354 --> 01:12:37,940 I hope they've told the British ambassador. 1100 01:12:38,107 --> 01:12:40,776 Surely Shazzer would have raised the alert. 1101 01:12:40,943 --> 01:12:43,196 Maybe they got Shazzer as well. 1102 01:12:44,489 --> 01:12:46,908 [Woman speaks Thai] 1103 01:12:50,244 --> 01:12:53,247 Oh, God, 28 hours. 1104 01:12:54,123 --> 01:12:56,083 How much longer? 1105 01:12:56,250 --> 01:12:59,086 [Man] Jones. Bridget Jones, you come now. 1106 01:13:02,673 --> 01:13:03,716 [Clang] 1107 01:13:08,179 --> 01:13:11,349 Charlie Parker-Knowles, Assistant Consul. 1108 01:13:11,516 --> 01:13:13,768 Thank God you're here. 1109 01:13:15,520 --> 01:13:17,355 Um, shall we... 1110 01:13:17,522 --> 01:13:20,650 I really had absolutely nothing to do with it. 1111 01:13:20,817 --> 01:13:22,819 Jed planned the whole thing. 1112 01:13:22,985 --> 01:13:26,072 That's why he snogged Shazzer, who's much older than him 1113 01:13:26,239 --> 01:13:28,241 and slightly past her peak. 1114 01:13:28,407 --> 01:13:30,952 Yes, he sounds the most frightful shit. 1115 01:13:31,118 --> 01:13:32,411 Mmm. 1116 01:13:32,578 --> 01:13:37,083 The bore is everyone who gets caught has exactly the same story, 1117 01:13:37,250 --> 01:13:42,046 so unless we find this, this Jed fellow and get a full confession, 1118 01:13:42,213 --> 01:13:44,340 you're on a bit of a sticky wicket. 1119 01:13:44,966 --> 01:13:46,884 Well, how sticky? 1120 01:13:47,051 --> 01:13:49,387 Something like 15 to 20 years. 1121 01:13:49,554 --> 01:13:53,141 - [Whispers] 15 years? - Or maybe ten if we're lucky. 1122 01:13:53,307 --> 01:13:55,309 Ten years! 1123 01:13:55,476 --> 01:13:57,854 In here? 1124 01:14:10,449 --> 01:14:12,577 [Bridget] Very black. 1125 01:14:12,743 --> 01:14:16,914 All my life I've had the feeling something terrible was about to happen. 1126 01:14:17,707 --> 01:14:19,917 Now it has. 1127 01:14:22,086 --> 01:14:24,088 Bijjit, right? 1128 01:14:24,255 --> 01:14:26,215 Bridget, actually. 1129 01:14:26,382 --> 01:14:28,217 My name Phrao. 1130 01:14:28,384 --> 01:14:30,386 You're my friend? 1131 01:14:36,642 --> 01:14:38,728 - Steady on! - Superbra! 1132 01:14:38,895 --> 01:14:42,106 You lend me. One day, two cigarette. 1133 01:14:42,940 --> 01:14:44,901 Oh. [laughs] 1134 01:14:45,067 --> 01:14:47,320 Well, I'll think about it. 1135 01:14:48,154 --> 01:14:50,490 Actually, I was thinking of giving up, 1136 01:14:50,656 --> 01:14:54,118 but that was before I was arrested and thrown into a Thai prison 1137 01:14:54,285 --> 01:14:56,913 for ten to 15 years. [laughs] 1138 01:14:57,497 --> 01:14:59,749 Circumstances change. 1139 01:15:01,709 --> 01:15:05,004 No, it really, really is "touched". 1140 01:15:05,588 --> 01:15:10,218 "Like a vir-gin, touched for the very first time". 1141 01:15:10,384 --> 01:15:11,928 - No, you wrong. - No. 1142 01:15:12,094 --> 01:15:14,055 # Like a wersion 1143 01:15:14,222 --> 01:15:17,099 - Vir-gin. - # Fucked for the very first time 1144 01:15:17,266 --> 01:15:20,978 - Touched. - # Like a wersion 1145 01:15:21,145 --> 01:15:23,314 [Bridget] Ten years of this? I 1146 01:15:23,481 --> 01:15:26,317 Stop! Enough. Enough. 1147 01:15:26,484 --> 01:15:30,279 If you're going to do it, you really ought to do it properly. 1148 01:15:30,905 --> 01:15:36,327 After all, Madonna is nothing if not a perfectionist. 1149 01:15:36,494 --> 01:15:38,871 Five, six, seven, eight and one... 1150 01:15:39,038 --> 01:15:41,332 # Like a virgin 1151 01:15:42,291 --> 01:15:46,295 # Touched for the very first time 1152 01:15:46,671 --> 01:15:50,550 # Like a virgin 1153 01:15:50,716 --> 01:15:53,344 # When your heart beats 1154 01:15:53,511 --> 01:15:56,347 # Next to mine... 1155 01:15:56,514 --> 01:15:58,099 [cheering] 1156 01:16:00,726 --> 01:16:02,770 [Bridget] Dear Mum and Dad, 1157 01:16:02,937 --> 01:16:04,939 I'm missing you a lot. 1158 01:16:05,106 --> 01:16:07,525 Please write as soon as you can. 1159 01:16:10,111 --> 01:16:12,363 I'm feeling pretty low. 1160 01:16:13,614 --> 01:16:15,658 [Man] Bijjit Jone. 1161 01:16:15,825 --> 01:16:18,244 [Inmates shout] 1162 01:16:19,162 --> 01:16:21,706 In there. You have five minutes. 1163 01:16:21,873 --> 01:16:23,666 Just five. 1164 01:16:23,833 --> 01:16:25,835 [Door creaks and clangs] 1165 01:16:31,799 --> 01:16:33,301 Mark? 1166 01:16:38,139 --> 01:16:40,141 You all right? 1167 01:16:40,308 --> 01:16:42,852 Oh... [laughs] Fine. 1168 01:16:43,019 --> 01:16:44,729 Hmm. 1169 01:16:49,859 --> 01:16:52,820 And... scared shitless. 1170 01:16:52,987 --> 01:16:55,031 But, you know, perky. 1171 01:16:57,700 --> 01:17:00,203 I can't believe you've come all this way. 1172 01:17:00,369 --> 01:17:03,748 I haven't. I was out here handling a Foreign Office case 1173 01:17:03,915 --> 01:17:05,917 when I heard about your situation. 1174 01:17:06,083 --> 01:17:08,586 I haven't done anything wrong. 1175 01:17:08,753 --> 01:17:11,380 I promise you, it's all a big mistake. 1176 01:17:11,547 --> 01:17:14,050 Yes, well, I'm sure it is. 1177 01:17:14,217 --> 01:17:17,386 I've got all the papers here and I'm sure we can sort it out. 1178 01:17:17,553 --> 01:17:22,058 I think about you all the time. And I'm so sorry, 1179 01:17:22,225 --> 01:17:26,562 I really, really am, for everything that happened between us. 1180 01:17:26,729 --> 01:17:28,773 Yes, well... [clears throat] 1181 01:17:28,940 --> 01:17:32,777 We don't have much time and I need you to identify someone for me. 1182 01:17:32,944 --> 01:17:36,906 Is this the man with whom you were seen taking hallucinogenic mushrooms 1183 01:17:37,073 --> 01:17:39,742 before you spent the night with Daniel Cleaver? 1184 01:17:39,909 --> 01:17:42,662 Yes, that's him, but I think you should know... 1185 01:17:42,829 --> 01:17:45,998 The same man who gave you the snake containing the drugs? 1186 01:17:46,165 --> 01:17:48,584 Yes, that's him, that's Jed. 1187 01:17:48,751 --> 01:17:50,837 But it was Shazzer's snake, not mine, 1188 01:17:51,003 --> 01:17:53,297 and as far as Daniel Cleaver goes... 1189 01:17:53,464 --> 01:17:56,592 Your sex life doesn't concern me at all. 1190 01:18:07,895 --> 01:18:10,439 Has there been any ill treatment here? 1191 01:18:11,023 --> 01:18:14,652 No, no. Well, I mean... 1192 01:18:15,278 --> 01:18:18,114 ...the toilet facilities are well below par, but... 1193 01:18:18,281 --> 01:18:20,283 Good, that makes things simpler. 1194 01:18:23,828 --> 01:18:27,039 Listen, they're prepared to drop all charges against you 1195 01:18:27,206 --> 01:18:30,710 which is extremely lenient, given the circumstances. 1196 01:18:30,877 --> 01:18:33,421 You're going to be out within a week. 1197 01:18:37,300 --> 01:18:38,801 And... 1198 01:18:42,722 --> 01:18:44,140 [zip] 1199 01:18:46,434 --> 01:18:48,269 Goodbye. 1200 01:18:52,857 --> 01:18:54,317 Mark? 1201 01:18:54,484 --> 01:18:56,152 [Clang] 1202 01:19:04,869 --> 01:19:06,746 Thank you. 1203 01:19:07,371 --> 01:19:11,375 You're welcome. I'm just the messenger. The order came from above. 1204 01:19:13,419 --> 01:19:16,255 Well, good luck. Glad I could be of help. 1205 01:19:38,945 --> 01:19:40,988 So, Bijjit, what happen? 1206 01:19:41,155 --> 01:19:43,282 Well, um... 1207 01:19:44,283 --> 01:19:46,577 Bijjit! How this can happen? 1208 01:19:46,744 --> 01:19:49,872 This is terrible! You are innocent! 1209 01:19:50,039 --> 01:19:53,751 - They're always cheating us. - No, no, no. That's all fine. 1210 01:19:53,918 --> 01:19:57,380 They've dropped the charges and they're letting me go. 1211 01:19:57,547 --> 01:19:59,507 But that good news. 1212 01:19:59,674 --> 01:20:01,759 What is wrong? 1213 01:20:02,885 --> 01:20:05,680 Mark Darcy definitely... 1214 01:20:05,847 --> 01:20:08,432 ...doesn't love me anymore. 1215 01:20:08,599 --> 01:20:10,434 [All] Ohhh. 1216 01:20:11,102 --> 01:20:13,855 You see the trouble is it was me who chucked him. 1217 01:20:14,021 --> 01:20:16,149 [Phrao] He treat you bad? 1218 01:20:16,315 --> 01:20:18,317 Yeah, actually, he did. 1219 01:20:18,484 --> 01:20:20,820 My boyfriend treat me bad too. 1220 01:20:20,987 --> 01:20:22,613 - Me too. - [Girl] Mine as well. 1221 01:20:22,780 --> 01:20:24,198 [Girl] Me too. 1222 01:20:24,365 --> 01:20:27,869 Then you know all about it. You think you've found the right man, 1223 01:20:28,035 --> 01:20:30,454 but then there's so much wrong with him 1224 01:20:30,621 --> 01:20:34,876 and he finds there's so much wrong with you and it all just falls apart. 1225 01:20:35,042 --> 01:20:37,461 Don't tell me. My boyfriend, 1226 01:20:37,628 --> 01:20:39,630 he seem really nice. 1227 01:20:39,797 --> 01:20:43,885 Then he start to hit me. Make me work on street. 1228 01:20:44,051 --> 01:20:46,471 My boyfriend, he say he love me. 1229 01:20:46,637 --> 01:20:50,433 But he do no work, and make me work 24 hour a day. 1230 01:20:50,600 --> 01:20:52,768 Then he make me take heroin drug. 1231 01:20:52,935 --> 01:20:56,606 What about you, Bijjit? What your bad boyfriend do? 1232 01:20:58,065 --> 01:21:00,109 Well, er... 1233 01:21:00,943 --> 01:21:04,780 ...he really didn't stick up for me at this lawyers' supper... 1234 01:21:04,947 --> 01:21:09,494 and, um, then he would fold his... [chuckles] 1235 01:21:11,287 --> 01:21:14,248 Oh, same sort of thing, really. 1236 01:21:14,415 --> 01:21:19,462 Hitting me and making me take drugs. Stealing all my money and stuff. 1237 01:21:19,962 --> 01:21:24,467 [Bridget] Oh, God. I've been the world's biggest fool. 1238 01:21:25,134 --> 01:21:27,178 [Gate slams] 1239 01:21:30,473 --> 01:21:32,308 Bijjit? 1240 01:21:33,267 --> 01:21:36,187 Just a few tiny leaving presents. No luxuries. 1241 01:21:38,231 --> 01:21:39,816 [All gasp] 1242 01:21:39,982 --> 01:21:42,443 # [Madonna] Living in a material world 1243 01:21:42,610 --> 01:21:44,904 # And I am a material girl 1244 01:21:45,071 --> 01:21:49,450 # You know that we are living in a material world 1245 01:21:49,617 --> 01:21:52,078 # And I am a material girl 1246 01:21:53,371 --> 01:21:56,541 # Living in a material world 1247 01:21:56,707 --> 01:21:59,710 # And I am a material girl # 1248 01:22:01,087 --> 01:22:03,381 If you want something smooth on your wall, 1249 01:22:03,548 --> 01:22:05,550 you could do worse than John Currin. 1250 01:22:05,716 --> 01:22:08,886 He is about the only contemporary painter who can paint. 1251 01:22:09,053 --> 01:22:12,348 There's usually something interesting and allegorical, 1252 01:22:12,515 --> 01:22:15,518 plus of course, there is a very high perv quotient. 1253 01:22:15,685 --> 01:22:18,104 - [Mark] Did you see her? - Out. Out it. 1254 01:22:18,271 --> 01:22:20,690 Sorry, everyone, sorry. It's my stalker. 1255 01:22:21,941 --> 01:22:24,443 Fuck off, Darcy, some people have jobs to do. 1256 01:22:25,278 --> 01:22:28,990 Did you see her surrounded by police, dogs, handcuffs? 1257 01:22:29,157 --> 01:22:32,660 Come on, she's a big girl, she can take care of herself. 1258 01:22:32,827 --> 01:22:36,247 I'm only going to ask you one more time. Did you see her? 1259 01:22:36,414 --> 01:22:38,833 You're only gonna ask me one more time? 1260 01:22:39,041 --> 01:22:42,628 - You haven't got your wig on now, dear. - I'll take that as a yes. 1261 01:22:42,795 --> 01:22:45,047 Yes, I did see her. 1262 01:22:45,214 --> 01:22:48,676 I thought she was smuggling seashells, or mangoes. 1263 01:22:48,843 --> 01:22:50,219 Right. 1264 01:22:50,386 --> 01:22:54,724 Right, good. Will you step outside, please? 1265 01:22:54,891 --> 01:22:57,143 Oh, no, it's not possible. 1266 01:22:57,310 --> 01:23:00,855 Darcy, do you have any idea what century we actually live in? 1267 01:23:01,022 --> 01:23:04,442 Are you gonna step outside or am I gonna have to drag you? 1268 01:23:04,609 --> 01:23:06,903 I think you're gonna have to drag me. 1269 01:23:07,069 --> 01:23:09,197 [Birds cry] 1270 01:23:09,363 --> 01:23:12,200 [# The Darkness: I Believe In A Thing Called Love] 1271 01:23:12,366 --> 01:23:15,912 - [Daniel] You're insane! - And you're a disgrace, Cleaver. 1272 01:23:16,537 --> 01:23:18,748 [Daniel] You're pulling my hair! 1273 01:23:18,915 --> 01:23:22,126 I'm not going in the sodding water. 1274 01:23:25,588 --> 01:23:29,717 # Touching you 'Cause you're touching me 1275 01:23:32,011 --> 01:23:33,763 # I believe in a thing called love 1276 01:23:33,930 --> 01:23:35,890 # Just listen to the rhythm of my heart 1277 01:23:36,057 --> 01:23:37,558 # There's a chance we can make it now 1278 01:23:37,725 --> 01:23:39,644 # We'll be rockin' till the sun goes down 1279 01:23:39,811 --> 01:23:43,064 # I believe in a thing called love 1280 01:23:43,231 --> 01:23:45,775 # Oooh-ooh ooh... 1281 01:23:45,942 --> 01:23:48,569 - Fuck off! - No, you're going in, Cleaver! 1282 01:23:48,736 --> 01:23:51,531 If I'm going in, you're coming with me. 1283 01:23:51,697 --> 01:23:53,574 You smug bastard. 1284 01:23:53,741 --> 01:23:55,660 [Clamoring] 1285 01:23:55,827 --> 01:23:58,079 - [Daniel] Oh, my God. - Get up. 1286 01:23:58,246 --> 01:24:00,248 [Child laughs] 1287 01:24:01,833 --> 01:24:03,835 Well, what are you gonna do now? 1288 01:24:04,001 --> 01:24:06,420 Drown me in 16 inches of water? 1289 01:24:06,587 --> 01:24:08,381 Yes, good idea. 1290 01:24:14,929 --> 01:24:16,556 Fuck! Stop, stop. 1291 01:24:16,722 --> 01:24:18,808 Listen, listen, listen... 1292 01:24:18,975 --> 01:24:23,312 OK, I left her at the airport. I shouldn't have done that. 1293 01:24:24,313 --> 01:24:26,482 But she bumped into Jed herself 1294 01:24:26,649 --> 01:24:29,485 and I didn't fucking well seduce her, all right? 1295 01:24:30,695 --> 01:24:33,406 - You didn't? - There's something wrong with her. 1296 01:24:33,573 --> 01:24:35,408 She's gone all frigid. 1297 01:24:35,575 --> 01:24:37,952 I spent the night with a gorgeous Thai girl. 1298 01:24:38,119 --> 01:24:40,955 Who in fact turned out to be a gorgeous Thai boy. 1299 01:24:41,664 --> 01:24:43,124 Satisfied? 1300 01:24:45,835 --> 01:24:47,503 Yes. 1301 01:24:47,670 --> 01:24:49,255 Thank you. 1302 01:24:53,926 --> 01:24:55,928 You know what, mate? 1303 01:24:56,554 --> 01:25:00,725 If you're so obsessed with Bridget Jones, why don't you just marry her? 1304 01:25:02,477 --> 01:25:04,896 'Cause then she'd definitely shag me. 1305 01:25:06,689 --> 01:25:08,316 # I believe in a thing called love 1306 01:25:08,483 --> 01:25:10,234 # Just listen to the rhythm of my heart 1307 01:25:10,401 --> 01:25:13,779 # I believe in a thing called love # 1308 01:25:14,906 --> 01:25:17,700 - [man] Bridget! - [Second man] Bridget! Over here! 1309 01:25:17,867 --> 01:25:18,993 [Reporters shout] 1310 01:25:19,160 --> 01:25:21,537 - What was it like? - How did you survive? 1311 01:25:21,704 --> 01:25:26,083 Any girl who's been single in London knows how to handle herself. 1312 01:25:26,250 --> 01:25:28,878 - Darling! - [Man] Will you be going back? 1313 01:25:29,045 --> 01:25:31,756 Sorry I didn't write. I've just been so busy. 1314 01:25:31,923 --> 01:25:34,884 Hello, darling. You look lovely. 1315 01:25:35,051 --> 01:25:37,845 - Skinny, but lovely. - Oh, thank you. 1316 01:25:38,012 --> 01:25:41,140 - [Reporters shout] - Oh, it's good to be home. 1317 01:25:41,307 --> 01:25:43,726 - [Mr. Jones] Ciggy? - No, no, thanks. 1318 01:25:43,893 --> 01:25:47,104 - I've given up again. - Shame. I find them very useful. 1319 01:25:47,271 --> 01:25:51,484 I take great comfort in the fact they might kill me before things get worse. 1320 01:25:59,909 --> 01:26:03,120 The Darcys rang to say how pleased they were you were out. 1321 01:26:03,955 --> 01:26:06,791 I rather thought Mark might be here to meet you. 1322 01:26:06,958 --> 01:26:09,460 Yes, but you must remember we split up. 1323 01:26:09,627 --> 01:26:11,921 So no hope there? 1324 01:26:12,088 --> 01:26:14,090 No hope there. 1325 01:26:14,257 --> 01:26:19,303 Believe me, next time I will not fuck it up, Mum. 1326 01:26:19,470 --> 01:26:21,681 - Language, darling. - Sorry. 1327 01:26:22,807 --> 01:26:26,394 Next time, I will not fuck it up... 1328 01:26:27,019 --> 01:26:29,355 ...Mother. - [Mr. Jones laughs] 1329 01:26:29,772 --> 01:26:31,774 [# Robbie Williams: Misunderstood] 1330 01:26:31,941 --> 01:26:34,152 # Trying to be misunderstood 1331 01:26:38,656 --> 01:26:42,326 # But it doesn't do me any good 1332 01:26:46,747 --> 01:26:50,501 # Love the way they smiled at me 1333 01:26:50,668 --> 01:26:54,213 # Hold that face for eternity 1334 01:26:55,006 --> 01:26:59,010 # Now let them all fly off 1335 01:27:02,138 --> 01:27:05,266 # When it comes down 1336 01:27:05,808 --> 01:27:09,562 # It all comes down 1337 01:27:10,897 --> 01:27:14,692 # And you will not be found 1338 01:27:18,070 --> 01:27:21,199 # When it's over 1339 01:27:21,782 --> 01:27:24,994 # It's all over 1340 01:27:26,996 --> 01:27:30,291 # Even if I make a sound... 1341 01:27:37,465 --> 01:27:39,133 Surprise! 1342 01:27:39,300 --> 01:27:41,219 - Hello. - Hello. 1343 01:27:41,385 --> 01:27:43,387 - [Tom] Oh, darling. - Hiya. 1344 01:27:44,096 --> 01:27:45,598 Bridget... 1345 01:27:45,765 --> 01:27:47,725 I'm so sorry. 1346 01:27:49,310 --> 01:27:51,521 It's all right. 1347 01:27:55,066 --> 01:27:59,028 Well, thank God for Mark Darcy. I mean, he might be a boring arse, 1348 01:27:59,195 --> 01:28:01,322 but he performed a miracle. 1349 01:28:02,615 --> 01:28:05,117 That's a bit of an overstatement. 1350 01:28:05,785 --> 01:28:08,496 He actually seems to be the villain of this piece. 1351 01:28:09,121 --> 01:28:13,960 He's a top human rights lawyer and he left it to someone else to get me out. 1352 01:28:14,126 --> 01:28:16,254 He was just a messenger. 1353 01:28:17,255 --> 01:28:20,091 - [Tom] Who told you that? - He did. 1354 01:28:20,258 --> 01:28:22,343 Straight from the horse's mouth. 1355 01:28:23,219 --> 01:28:25,972 The horse wasn't quite telling you the truth. 1356 01:28:26,139 --> 01:28:28,558 I called Mark the minute I landed in London. 1357 01:28:28,724 --> 01:28:31,185 We went to his office and within half an hour, 1358 01:28:31,352 --> 01:28:34,355 he'd woken two Cabinet ministers and half of Ml5. 1359 01:28:34,522 --> 01:28:38,609 But none of them could locate Jed, so Mark flew over to Interpol. 1360 01:28:38,776 --> 01:28:41,154 Which is in Lyon. They located Jed in Dubai, 1361 01:28:41,320 --> 01:28:43,948 but they don't normally extradite people, 1362 01:28:44,115 --> 01:28:47,493 so Mark rang the Home Secretary who rang our ambassador... 1363 01:28:47,660 --> 01:28:50,955 In Riyadh. Then Mark flew to Dubai where he identified Jed, 1364 01:28:51,122 --> 01:28:53,499 who was impounded and pushed out into... 1365 01:28:53,666 --> 01:28:56,669 Saudi Arabia, where Mark was waiting with the police. 1366 01:28:56,836 --> 01:29:01,257 Jed was arrested and extradited back to Britain. Then Mark flew to Bangkok, 1367 01:29:01,424 --> 01:29:04,552 to make damn sure they'd let you go. 1368 01:29:05,470 --> 01:29:07,096 Oh. 1369 01:29:11,350 --> 01:29:14,103 He was just angry about Daniel Cleaver. 1370 01:29:16,814 --> 01:29:19,817 - He must still love me. - He fucking must. 1371 01:29:20,401 --> 01:29:22,195 Taxi? 1372 01:29:22,361 --> 01:29:23,696 Yes, please. 1373 01:29:25,490 --> 01:29:27,658 [All shriek] 1374 01:29:27,825 --> 01:29:30,036 Get in the cab! 1375 01:29:30,203 --> 01:29:32,246 [All shout] 1376 01:29:33,706 --> 01:29:35,374 Hurry! 1377 01:29:59,690 --> 01:30:03,444 Oh. I forgot about you. 1378 01:30:04,529 --> 01:30:07,532 Er, I, I, I just wanted to, um... 1379 01:30:07,698 --> 01:30:09,826 say something to Mark. 1380 01:30:09,992 --> 01:30:12,370 He's at the office. Do you want to come in? 1381 01:30:13,663 --> 01:30:17,041 Oh, no. No, no, I don't think I will. 1382 01:30:18,376 --> 01:30:21,796 I really hope that you'll be happy together. 1383 01:30:21,963 --> 01:30:24,090 - Sorry? - You and Mark. 1384 01:30:24,257 --> 01:30:28,219 I really hope that you'll be very happy together. 1385 01:30:28,386 --> 01:30:30,471 No, no, no, Bridget, listen... 1386 01:30:30,638 --> 01:30:33,057 you've got it completely wrong. 1387 01:30:33,224 --> 01:30:35,518 I'm not in love with him. 1388 01:30:35,685 --> 01:30:37,979 How could I be when I'm... 1389 01:30:38,146 --> 01:30:41,315 seriously heartbroken and smitten with someone else? 1390 01:30:42,650 --> 01:30:44,735 Someone else? 1391 01:30:44,902 --> 01:30:47,697 - You, Bridget. - Me? 1392 01:30:48,322 --> 01:30:51,951 Ever since I saw you here with your hair messed that night 1393 01:30:52,118 --> 01:30:55,079 and bits of garden stuck to you. You must have noticed. 1394 01:30:55,246 --> 01:30:59,542 I try to hide it, but every time I see you, I light up. 1395 01:31:01,711 --> 01:31:04,088 I thought you were just, you know... 1396 01:31:05,131 --> 01:31:06,340 ...lying. 1397 01:31:06,507 --> 01:31:08,676 Was every look I ever gave you a lie? 1398 01:31:08,843 --> 01:31:10,595 I've been looking forward to this. 1399 01:31:10,761 --> 01:31:13,097 Lovely to see you, Bridget. 1400 01:31:31,115 --> 01:31:33,284 - [Rebecca sighs] - Thank you very much. 1401 01:31:34,785 --> 01:31:36,913 That was lovely. 1402 01:31:38,247 --> 01:31:40,082 Really lovely. 1403 01:31:40,249 --> 01:31:42,793 But I'm afraid it's still men in general, 1404 01:31:42,960 --> 01:31:46,798 and Mark Darcy in particular, that I love. 1405 01:31:47,215 --> 01:31:48,549 Right. 1406 01:31:50,510 --> 01:31:54,472 If, er, if I ever do decide to, um... 1407 01:31:54,972 --> 01:31:57,809 you know, bat for the other side... 1408 01:31:59,185 --> 01:32:01,604 ...well, there's no-one else. 1409 01:32:02,271 --> 01:32:03,648 Only you. 1410 01:32:06,567 --> 01:32:08,611 [# Jamie Cullum: Everlasting Love] 1411 01:32:11,447 --> 01:32:14,200 - Hello, Giles. - Hello, Bridget. 1412 01:32:15,868 --> 01:32:17,995 # Open up your eyes 1413 01:32:18,162 --> 01:32:19,872 # Then you'll realize 1414 01:32:20,039 --> 01:32:21,749 # Here I stand with my 1415 01:32:21,916 --> 01:32:23,835 # Everlasting love 1416 01:32:24,001 --> 01:32:25,878 # Need you by my side 1417 01:32:26,045 --> 01:32:27,755 # Girl, to be my bride 1418 01:32:27,922 --> 01:32:29,590 # You'll never be denied... 1419 01:32:29,757 --> 01:32:32,343 Inns of Court, please. Fast as you can. 1420 01:32:36,514 --> 01:32:39,142 What do you think of this jacket? 1421 01:32:39,308 --> 01:32:41,936 - Yeah, very nice indeed. - No, be honest. 1422 01:32:42,103 --> 01:32:45,481 What do you think of the whole jacket/trouser combination? 1423 01:32:46,065 --> 01:32:50,069 - Disaster. - Actually, can we take a tiny detour? 1424 01:32:51,070 --> 01:32:53,823 I'll be back in literally two seconds. 1425 01:32:55,533 --> 01:32:57,660 # Where life really flows 1426 01:32:57,827 --> 01:32:59,370 # No-one really knows 1427 01:32:59,537 --> 01:33:01,122 # Till someone's there to show 1428 01:33:01,289 --> 01:33:03,040 # The way to lasting love 1429 01:33:03,207 --> 01:33:06,711 # Need a love to last forever 1430 01:33:07,170 --> 01:33:10,548 # Need a love to last forever... 1431 01:33:16,637 --> 01:33:18,389 Oh. 1432 01:33:22,935 --> 01:33:26,147 [# Barry White: You're My First, My Last, My Everything] 1433 01:33:29,984 --> 01:33:31,652 # You're the first 1434 01:33:31,819 --> 01:33:33,529 # The last 1435 01:33:33,696 --> 01:33:35,656 # My everything 1436 01:33:37,283 --> 01:33:39,494 # And the answer to 1437 01:33:40,244 --> 01:33:42,413 # All my dreams 1438 01:33:44,874 --> 01:33:46,459 # You're my sun 1439 01:33:46,626 --> 01:33:48,169 # My moon 1440 01:33:49,712 --> 01:33:51,547 # My guiding star 1441 01:33:53,174 --> 01:33:55,593 # My kind of wonderful 1442 01:33:56,928 --> 01:33:58,721 # That's what you are... 1443 01:34:00,139 --> 01:34:02,600 - You look gorgeous. - Thank you. 1444 01:34:02,767 --> 01:34:05,394 Very important at this moment. 1445 01:34:07,146 --> 01:34:09,357 # There's no way 1446 01:34:09,774 --> 01:34:12,193 - # They could have made two... - [shrieks] 1447 01:34:13,444 --> 01:34:15,696 Doesn't matter. It's not about looks. 1448 01:34:16,447 --> 01:34:18,199 [Shrieks] 1449 01:34:18,366 --> 01:34:21,911 - # Your love I'll keep for evermore - As I was saying. 1450 01:34:22,078 --> 01:34:23,454 # You're the first... 1451 01:34:24,121 --> 01:34:27,291 Excuse me, I'm looking for Mr. Darcy. 1452 01:34:27,458 --> 01:34:30,711 Down there, right along the corridor, and just to the left. 1453 01:34:30,878 --> 01:34:32,672 Thank you very much. 1454 01:34:32,839 --> 01:34:35,842 [# Beyoncé: Crazy In Love] 1455 01:34:42,473 --> 01:34:45,101 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1456 01:34:45,268 --> 01:34:47,311 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1457 01:34:47,478 --> 01:34:49,689 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1458 01:34:49,856 --> 01:34:52,024 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no... 1459 01:34:53,609 --> 01:34:56,487 I love you. I always have and I always will. 1460 01:34:59,490 --> 01:35:01,617 Oh, um... 1461 01:35:01,784 --> 01:35:05,121 I don't love you, and I never have, and... 1462 01:35:05,705 --> 01:35:08,249 ...I never will. Sorry. 1463 01:35:18,509 --> 01:35:20,303 Come in. 1464 01:35:25,850 --> 01:35:27,977 Hello, Bridget. 1465 01:35:28,144 --> 01:35:30,146 Hello, Mark. 1466 01:35:30,688 --> 01:35:32,523 Er... 1467 01:35:33,232 --> 01:35:35,193 I'm sorry, I'm disturbing you. 1468 01:35:37,403 --> 01:35:40,281 - Well, yes, a bit. - I'll just... 1469 01:35:40,448 --> 01:35:42,658 sit outside while you finish. 1470 01:35:42,825 --> 01:35:47,205 No, no, no, please, say what you have to say, young lady. 1471 01:35:48,206 --> 01:35:51,542 Mr. Santiago is the Peruvian Secretary for Trade. 1472 01:35:52,168 --> 01:35:54,462 And Mr. Hernández is his number two. 1473 01:35:55,546 --> 01:35:57,590 Hello. [chuckles] 1474 01:35:57,757 --> 01:35:59,300 Hello. 1475 01:36:00,092 --> 01:36:02,220 Hello, hello, hello. [laughs] 1476 01:36:06,682 --> 01:36:09,018 How can we help you, young lady? 1477 01:36:10,144 --> 01:36:11,896 Well, er... 1478 01:36:13,022 --> 01:36:15,066 Er... [Bridget laughs] 1479 01:36:15,233 --> 01:36:17,985 I just wanted to tell Mr. Darcy here 1480 01:36:18,152 --> 01:36:23,032 that I heard what magnificent work 1481 01:36:23,199 --> 01:36:26,202 he actually did releasing me from prison. 1482 01:36:26,369 --> 01:36:28,454 [Muttering] 1483 01:36:28,621 --> 01:36:34,627 Tiny, tiny misunderstanding to do with an enormous stash of cocaine. 1484 01:36:34,794 --> 01:36:37,463 And I also wanted to say, 1485 01:36:37,630 --> 01:36:41,843 since having found out that his girlfriend is actually a lesbian... 1486 01:36:42,009 --> 01:36:43,803 [man coughs] 1487 01:36:45,263 --> 01:36:47,014 ...that I love him. 1488 01:36:50,143 --> 01:36:53,271 Always have. Always will. 1489 01:36:54,689 --> 01:36:57,567 And that I'm... 1490 01:36:58,693 --> 01:37:00,194 ...you know... 1491 01:37:00,778 --> 01:37:02,822 ...available for dates... 1492 01:37:03,447 --> 01:37:06,075 ...if he should feel so inclined. 1493 01:37:10,663 --> 01:37:13,332 So, er, your girlfriend is a lesbian. 1494 01:37:14,625 --> 01:37:18,254 Look, if you'll all just excuse us for a second... 1495 01:37:18,880 --> 01:37:20,673 I think we should... 1496 01:37:38,900 --> 01:37:42,778 Bridget, that was not the most romantic proposition I've ever heard. 1497 01:37:43,779 --> 01:37:46,407 Well, maybe it is romantic 1498 01:37:46,574 --> 01:37:48,993 because it's not. I mean... 1499 01:37:49,160 --> 01:37:52,914 I know there's no music playing, and it's not snowing, 1500 01:37:53,873 --> 01:37:59,420 but that doesn't mean that it, that it can't really be something. 1501 01:38:01,672 --> 01:38:03,674 You're right. 1502 01:38:05,676 --> 01:38:08,763 In fact, there's a question I've been meaning to ask you. 1503 01:38:08,930 --> 01:38:12,183 All right. As long as it's not "Will you marry me?" 1504 01:38:18,898 --> 01:38:22,276 Oh, God. It is "Will you marry me?" 1505 01:38:22,443 --> 01:38:24,779 Well, I'm not gonna say it now. 1506 01:38:24,946 --> 01:38:27,615 - Is it "Will you marry me?" - The moment's gone. 1507 01:38:27,782 --> 01:38:29,992 No. No, no, no. No, wait. 1508 01:38:30,785 --> 01:38:32,411 Wait. 1509 01:38:32,578 --> 01:38:33,955 - Bridget. - Start again. 1510 01:38:34,121 --> 01:38:36,165 - No. - Start again. 1511 01:38:36,332 --> 01:38:38,334 I'm not gonna... It's... 1512 01:38:38,501 --> 01:38:42,004 We've just stepped out into the corridor, 1513 01:38:42,171 --> 01:38:44,382 you say "I've got a question to ask you" 1514 01:38:44,549 --> 01:38:46,759 and I don't say anything. 1515 01:38:52,557 --> 01:38:54,809 And... And... 1516 01:38:55,893 --> 01:38:57,562 You say... 1517 01:39:05,736 --> 01:39:08,573 Bridget Jones, will you marry me? 1518 01:39:29,886 --> 01:39:33,723 [Vicar] Dearly beloved, we are gathered here this day 1519 01:39:33,890 --> 01:39:36,559 to unite this couple. 1520 01:39:37,143 --> 01:39:40,229 Do you affirm your love, one to the other? 1521 01:39:41,272 --> 01:39:43,566 I do. Again. 1522 01:39:43,733 --> 01:39:45,610 And Colin? 1523 01:39:45,776 --> 01:39:47,695 I do. Again. 1524 01:39:48,279 --> 01:39:50,406 As well. Of course. 1525 01:39:51,491 --> 01:39:54,243 [# Marvin Gaye: Let's Get It On] 1526 01:39:54,410 --> 01:39:58,289 # I've been really tryin', baby... 1527 01:40:00,249 --> 01:40:04,212 [Bridget] December 31st, year-end summary. 1528 01:40:04,378 --> 01:40:06,506 Prison stays, one. 1529 01:40:06,672 --> 01:40:09,425 Lesbian kisses, one. 1530 01:40:09,592 --> 01:40:11,969 Pounds lost, minus one. 1531 01:40:12,136 --> 01:40:16,641 Boyfriends lost but then regained following major diplomatic incident, 1532 01:40:16,808 --> 01:40:18,893 one. 1533 01:40:19,060 --> 01:40:21,979 Marriage proposals, one. 1534 01:40:22,146 --> 01:40:24,649 An excellent year's progress. 1535 01:40:24,816 --> 01:40:29,821 Bridget Jones has cocked things up for the very last time. 1536 01:40:30,822 --> 01:40:32,573 [Shrieks] 1537 01:40:35,368 --> 01:40:37,703 # [Will Young] Your love is king 1538 01:40:38,704 --> 01:40:40,832 # Crown you in my heart 1539 01:40:40,998 --> 01:40:43,042 # Your love is king 1540 01:40:44,043 --> 01:40:45,795 # Never need to part 1541 01:40:45,962 --> 01:40:48,464 # Your kisses ring 1542 01:40:49,382 --> 01:40:52,051 # Round and round and round my head 1543 01:40:52,218 --> 01:40:54,512 # Touching the very part of me 1544 01:40:54,679 --> 01:40:56,973 # It's making my soul sing 1545 01:40:57,140 --> 01:40:59,684 # Tearing the very heart of me 1546 01:40:59,851 --> 01:41:02,145 # I'm crying out for more 1547 01:41:02,311 --> 01:41:04,272 # Your love is king 1548 01:41:05,398 --> 01:41:07,316 # Crown you in my heart 1549 01:41:07,483 --> 01:41:09,694 # Your love is king... 1550 01:41:09,861 --> 01:41:14,866 [Bridget] So, as you can see, I have found my happy ending at last. 1551 01:41:15,032 --> 01:41:20,163 And I truly believe that happiness is possible. 1552 01:41:22,999 --> 01:41:27,170 Even when you're 33 and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls. 1553 01:41:27,336 --> 01:41:30,882 # Your love is real # 1554 01:41:34,677 --> 01:41:36,929 [# Beyoncé: Crazy In Love] 1555 01:41:44,395 --> 01:41:46,898 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1556 01:41:47,064 --> 01:41:49,233 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1557 01:41:49,400 --> 01:41:51,694 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1558 01:41:51,861 --> 01:41:53,946 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1559 01:41:58,993 --> 01:42:01,454 # I look and stare so deep in your eyes 1560 01:42:01,621 --> 01:42:03,873 # Touch on you more and more every time 1561 01:42:04,040 --> 01:42:06,292 # When you leave I'm begging you not to go 1562 01:42:06,459 --> 01:42:08,628 # Call your name two, three times in a row 1563 01:42:08,795 --> 01:42:11,088 # Such a funny thing for me to try to explain 1564 01:42:11,255 --> 01:42:13,883 # How I'm feeling and my pride is the one to blame 1565 01:42:14,050 --> 01:42:16,010 # 'Cause I know I don't understand 1566 01:42:16,177 --> 01:42:18,721 # Just how your love can do what no-one else can 1567 01:42:18,888 --> 01:42:20,473 # Got me lookin' so crazy right now 1568 01:42:20,640 --> 01:42:22,767 # Your love's got me lookin’ so crazy right now 1569 01:42:22,934 --> 01:42:25,144 # Your love's Got me lookin’ so crazy right now 1570 01:42:25,311 --> 01:42:27,730 # Your touch got me lookin’ so crazy right now 1571 01:42:27,897 --> 01:42:30,149 # Your love's Got me hopin' you'll page me right now 1572 01:42:30,316 --> 01:42:32,735 # Your kiss got me hoping you'll save me right now 1573 01:42:32,902 --> 01:42:34,904 # Lookin’ so crazy Your love's got me lookin' 1574 01:42:35,071 --> 01:42:37,532 # Got me lookin’ so crazy in love 1575 01:42:37,865 --> 01:42:40,117 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1576 01:42:40,284 --> 01:42:42,537 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1577 01:42:42,703 --> 01:42:44,956 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no 1578 01:42:45,122 --> 01:42:47,375 # Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh no no... 1579 01:42:47,542 --> 01:42:49,836 [# Jamie Cullum: Everlasting Love] 1580 01:42:55,133 --> 01:42:57,802 # Hearts gone astray 1581 01:42:57,969 --> 01:43:01,347 # Deep in her when they go 1582 01:43:02,890 --> 01:43:05,184 # I went away 1583 01:43:05,351 --> 01:43:08,938 # Just when you needed me so 1584 01:43:10,523 --> 01:43:12,859 # You won't regret 1585 01:43:13,025 --> 01:43:16,487 # I'll come back begging you 1586 01:43:16,988 --> 01:43:18,072 # Hmm 1587 01:43:18,239 --> 01:43:20,199 # Won't you forget 1588 01:43:20,366 --> 01:43:26,539 # Welcome love we once knew 1589 01:43:28,166 --> 01:43:31,836 # Open up your eyes Then you'll realize 1590 01:43:32,003 --> 01:43:35,381 # Here I stand with my everlasting love 1591 01:43:35,548 --> 01:43:39,302 # I need you by my side Girl to be my pride 1592 01:43:39,469 --> 01:43:47,977 # You'll never be denied everlasting love 1593 01:43:50,521 --> 01:43:53,107 # Hearts gone astray 1594 01:43:53,274 --> 01:43:56,611 # Deep in her when they go 1595 01:43:57,945 --> 01:44:00,323 # I went away 1596 01:44:00,865 --> 01:44:04,285 # Just when you needed me so 1597 01:44:05,661 --> 01:44:08,372 # You won't regret 1598 01:44:08,539 --> 01:44:12,126 # I'll come back begging you 1599 01:44:13,336 --> 01:44:15,588 # Won't you forget 1600 01:44:15,755 --> 01:44:21,803 # Welcome love we once knew 1601 01:44:23,471 --> 01:44:27,058 # Open up your eyes Then you'll realize 1602 01:44:27,225 --> 01:44:30,937 # Here I stand with my everlasting love 1603 01:44:31,103 --> 01:44:34,607 # Need you by my side Girl to be my pride 1604 01:44:34,774 --> 01:44:38,277 # You'll never be denied everlasting love 1605 01:44:38,444 --> 01:44:42,281 # From the very start Open up your heart 1606 01:44:42,448 --> 01:44:53,042 # Feel that you fall in everlasting love 1607 01:44:53,209 --> 01:44:57,046 # Need a love to last forever 1608 01:44:57,213 --> 01:45:00,842 # Need a love to last forever 1609 01:45:01,008 --> 01:45:04,554 # Need a love to last forever 1610 01:45:04,720 --> 01:45:17,567 # Need a love to last forever #