1
00:00:01,251 --> 00:00:09,092
♪

2
00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:20,020
♪

3
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:21,813
The success of
the James Bond films

4
00:00:21,813 --> 00:00:25,317
has made household names
out of actors playing Agent 007.

5
00:00:25,317 --> 00:00:26,276
Bond.

6
00:00:26,276 --> 00:00:27,778
The name's Bond.

7
00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:28,987
James Bond.

8
00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:30,822
Except for one.

9
00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:32,574
The forgotten James Bond.

10
00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:40,499
♪

11
00:00:40,499 --> 00:00:42,793
George Lazenby went from
being a car salesman

12
00:00:42,793 --> 00:00:44,753
in Queanbeyan in the 1960s

13
00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:46,338
to playing 007.

14
00:00:46,338 --> 00:00:49,258
Is it true that, as I think
you put it yourself once,

15
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:52,135
you told a pack of
lies to get the role?

16
00:00:52,135 --> 00:01:03,647
♪

17
00:01:03,647 --> 00:01:05,190
And now it's our great joy

18
00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:07,985
to welcome the new James Bond.

19
00:01:07,985 --> 00:01:20,205
♪

20
00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:21,957
Now this is a fascinating
situation, isn't it?

21
00:01:21,957 --> 00:01:22,916
Because you've, what,

22
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:26,086
you've refused
to do a second Bond?

23
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:45,856
♪

24
00:01:45,856 --> 00:01:47,441
(light clicks)

25
00:01:49,026 --> 00:01:50,902
So you're gonna
tell me your story.

26
00:01:50,902 --> 00:01:53,196
I'm wondering what
can I expect from it?

27
00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:54,239
Drama?

28
00:01:54,239 --> 00:01:55,699
Do I have drama about what?

29
00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:57,993
In your life story
that I'm gonna ask you.

30
00:01:57,993 --> 00:02:00,412
Is there drama?

31
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:01,788
What do you mean
"is there drama"?

32
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:04,875
-There's drama all my life.
-Is there romance?

33
00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:06,418
-Huh, yes.
-Is there romance?

34
00:02:06,418 --> 00:02:08,503
-Is there comedy?
-Yes.

35
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,213
Sex?

36
00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:11,256
A little.

37
00:02:11,256 --> 00:02:12,507
Drugs?

38
00:02:12,507 --> 00:02:13,759
Drugs, yeah, a little.

39
00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:15,594
-Violence?
-A little.

40
00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:17,262
Are there twists and turns?

41
00:02:17,262 --> 00:02:20,265
-Yes.
-Is it a good story?

42
00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:22,684
Oh, well, it depends

43
00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:26,188
if you like those
kind of stories, you know?

44
00:02:26,188 --> 00:02:33,779
♪

45
00:02:33,779 --> 00:02:36,907
Well, it all started, my life,

46
00:02:36,907 --> 00:02:38,617
from what I remember,

47
00:02:38,617 --> 00:02:39,951
being in hospital.

48
00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:41,078
Scalpel.

49
00:02:41,078 --> 00:02:43,413
♪

50
00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:44,539
Hold that, hold that.

51
00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:46,208
When I was three years old...

52
00:02:46,208 --> 00:02:48,418
Oh shit, he's awake!

53
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:52,381
Shh, go back to sleep.

54
00:02:52,381 --> 00:02:54,466
...they found that
I was peeing backwards

55
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:55,801
into my kidneys.

56
00:02:55,801 --> 00:02:56,802
♪

57
00:02:56,802 --> 00:02:59,596
They opened me up 67 times.

58
00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:01,139
I was left with half a kidney.

59
00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:02,641
♪

60
00:03:02,641 --> 00:03:05,727
My doctors told my mother
that I'd probably pass away

61
00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:07,104
around 12.

62
00:03:07,104 --> 00:03:08,438
♪

63
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:09,815
Maybe 13.

64
00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:11,233
I suppose, subconsciously,

65
00:03:11,233 --> 00:03:14,152
there was a part of me that
said I better get on with life

66
00:03:14,152 --> 00:03:15,696
because who knows?

67
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:17,739
It could be over any time.

68
00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:22,119
♪

69
00:03:22,119 --> 00:03:23,829
The first time
I ever stole a car

70
00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:25,163
I was six years old.

71
00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:26,081
♪

72
00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:27,374
I think I said to myself,

73
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:30,085
"I better make the best
of the time that I do have."

74
00:03:30,085 --> 00:03:31,236
♪

75
00:03:33,004 --> 00:03:34,423
And my dad never had a car

76
00:03:34,423 --> 00:03:36,466
because we were
a poor family.

77
00:03:36,466 --> 00:03:39,177
But my uncle used to
drive a '36 Ford.

78
00:03:39,177 --> 00:03:41,847
And I mean, I loved that thing.

79
00:03:41,847 --> 00:03:44,015
He'd always left
his keys in it.

80
00:03:44,015 --> 00:03:45,016
Crikey.

81
00:03:45,016 --> 00:03:47,269
And I had to get
underneath the dashboard...

82
00:03:47,269 --> 00:03:49,855
(engine roars to life)

83
00:03:49,855 --> 00:03:51,273
♪

84
00:03:51,273 --> 00:03:52,732
...and then I'd stand up

85
00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:54,234
and let the clutch out.

86
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,861
♪

87
00:03:55,861 --> 00:03:57,487
Then it would kangaroo hop.

88
00:03:57,487 --> 00:04:02,951
♪

89
00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:04,161
(horn honks)

90
00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:08,999
♪

91
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:10,333
That's how it was.

92
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,377
♪

93
00:04:12,377 --> 00:04:14,671
I was a larrikin.

94
00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:16,840
I was a wild larrikin

95
00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:18,341
doing whatever I liked

96
00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:20,635
and I'd been that way forever.

97
00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:21,720
(school bell rings)

98
00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:24,181
Hurry up, kids,
take your seats.

99
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:25,474
Settle down.

100
00:04:25,474 --> 00:04:26,683
Pencils out.

101
00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:27,893
♪

102
00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:29,603
So, as I was saying,

103
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,146
science is all around--

104
00:04:31,146 --> 00:04:33,774
Yeah, no one expected
much of anything from me.

105
00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:34,900
George.

106
00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:36,067
Pay attention!

107
00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:38,028
I didn't see
the point in school.

108
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:40,614
So this island here
is where we live.

109
00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:42,157
School was so boring.

110
00:04:42,157 --> 00:04:43,575
So boring.

111
00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:44,868
You know, it was, like,

112
00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:46,787
"God, I gotta learn
this geography thing."

113
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:50,749
China and Russia
and Hungary and the Ukraine.

114
00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:53,376
I had no use knowing
where England was

115
00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:54,753
or where America was,

116
00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:55,962
I was in Australia

117
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:57,005
and I wasn't going there.

118
00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,507
And the largest
clouds are called

119
00:04:58,507 --> 00:05:00,425
the cumulonimbus clouds.

120
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:04,179
Science, who gives
a shit about science?

121
00:05:04,179 --> 00:05:05,722
Yes, what is it, George?

122
00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:08,517
Is this gonna be
relevant to my life?

123
00:05:08,517 --> 00:05:09,976
♪

124
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:12,687
You know,
that was my attitude.

125
00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:16,107
George Lazenby,
outside right now.

126
00:05:16,107 --> 00:05:19,236
♪

127
00:05:19,236 --> 00:05:21,905
The vice headmaster,
Chook Warner.

128
00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:23,114
He hated me.

129
00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:24,241
♪

130
00:05:24,241 --> 00:05:27,327
Now, put out
your hands palms down.

131
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,663
He would cane me
for no reason frankly.

132
00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,206
Quickly now.

133
00:05:31,206 --> 00:05:32,457
"Who did this?

134
00:05:32,457 --> 00:05:34,334
Who brought the snake to school?

135
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,502
I bet you Lazenby did it.

136
00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:36,795
Come out outside."

137
00:05:36,795 --> 00:05:39,214
Because I did and I brought
a snake to school one day.

138
00:05:39,214 --> 00:05:47,055
♪

139
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:50,851
I had to find ways to get
me through the day, you know?

140
00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:54,312
Like possibly causing
a little bit of trouble.

141
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:56,815
The sun and it's all
part of the life cycle--

142
00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,316
One girl noticed it.

143
00:05:58,316 --> 00:06:00,694
(screaming)

144
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,487
Wasn't gonna hurt anyone.

145
00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:05,240
Another day I brought
a bag full of bats.

146
00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:06,783
Time for school, bats!

147
00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:07,826
I went down the sewers

148
00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:10,245
and got a whole
bag full of bats.

149
00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:12,163
I put them in my school bag

150
00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:13,707
and then I opened the bag

151
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:16,001
and they flew in the daylight.

152
00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:17,502
It was so much fun.

153
00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:19,713
People screaming, yelling,
and running everywhere.

154
00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:22,757
Children, try to remain calm!

155
00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:23,967
(chuckling)

156
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:26,344
It was worth getting
the cane that day.

157
00:06:26,344 --> 00:06:30,140
(engine revving)

158
00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:35,562
♪

159
00:06:35,562 --> 00:06:37,022
You know,
to be honest with you,

160
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:38,189
the things I was interested in

161
00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:40,275
were pranks and having fun.

162
00:06:40,275 --> 00:06:42,319
But when I turned 15,

163
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:43,737
things changed.

164
00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:44,905
I can remember one morning

165
00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:46,781
riding down the hill on my bike,

166
00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:49,701
there was a girl
sunbaking on the lawn

167
00:06:49,701 --> 00:06:51,494
around the corner
from my place.

168
00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:52,454
♪

169
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:53,913
June Green.

170
00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:57,542
She was 23 and I was 15.

171
00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:59,628
She had a fascinating body.

172
00:06:59,628 --> 00:07:00,629
♪

173
00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:01,713
So I stopped the bike

174
00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:03,548
and pretended something
was wrong with it.

175
00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:06,968
Okay, what is the problem here?

176
00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:08,720
Tire pressure seems fine.

177
00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:11,222
-I was fiddling with it...
-Might be the gas cap.

178
00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:13,266
...you know, and looking at it.

179
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:16,061
I had no idea how to
approach a girl at that time.

180
00:07:16,061 --> 00:07:18,188
Might be this thing here.

181
00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:19,189
♪

182
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:20,357
And she finally said,

183
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:22,359
"What are you looking at?"

184
00:07:22,359 --> 00:07:24,444
And I said, "Oh,
my bike's broken down."

185
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:27,113
Um, my bike's broken down.

186
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,573
Uh...

187
00:07:28,573 --> 00:07:31,242
can I come in,
you got any tools?

188
00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:32,869
♪

189
00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:34,579
Yeah, okay.

190
00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:35,830
(tools clattering)

191
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:36,790
♪

192
00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:39,668
Next thing I know,
I'm on top of her.

193
00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:41,586
This is fun.

194
00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:42,671
Yeah?

195
00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:43,963
Oh yeah, okay.

196
00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:46,174
-Okay.
-Cool.

197
00:07:46,174 --> 00:07:48,093
-Is that right?
-And we were dry rooting

198
00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:49,719
on the kitchen floor.

199
00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,262
Wait, what's dry rooting?

200
00:07:51,262 --> 00:07:54,307
That's doing it
with your clothes on.

201
00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:55,350
♪

202
00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:58,937
My arms are starting
to get tired a little bit.

203
00:07:58,937 --> 00:08:00,480
I had no idea what I was doing.

204
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:03,024
-You okay?
-Uh, uh, my pants

205
00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:05,318
are bunching up a little bit.

206
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:08,279
Eventually, she invited
me down at night.

207
00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:09,656
All right.

208
00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:13,034
And I can remember when we
made love for the first time.

209
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:15,120
♪

210
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,621
And it was fantastic.

211
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:17,831
♪

212
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:20,500
And all of a sudden
something took over my body.

213
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,127
♪

214
00:08:22,127 --> 00:08:25,171
I was, like, in space
and it was magnificent.

215
00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:27,006
The best feeling
I've ever had in my life.

216
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,300
(explosion)

217
00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:37,934
-I went, "Holy shit."
-Holy shit.

218
00:08:37,934 --> 00:08:39,060
What?

219
00:08:39,060 --> 00:08:41,521
I thought I'd blown
my penis apart.

220
00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:44,315
I got out of the car

221
00:08:44,315 --> 00:08:45,817
and struck a match
and checked it out

222
00:08:45,817 --> 00:08:48,737
to see everything
was still there.

223
00:08:48,737 --> 00:08:50,488
♪

224
00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:51,865
Are you okay?

225
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:54,325
Yeah, we're good.

226
00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:56,453
My penis is fine.

227
00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:58,830
And then I couldn't wait
to get back in the car

228
00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:00,707
and have another one.

229
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:03,793
I ended up going down
to her place every night.

230
00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:05,503
Why isn't everyone
doing this all the time?

231
00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:06,838
-Shut up!
-Okay.

232
00:09:06,838 --> 00:09:09,591
Until the school teacher
wrote a letter to my family

233
00:09:09,591 --> 00:09:12,510
that I couldn't keep
my eyes open during class.

234
00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:13,428
♪

235
00:09:13,428 --> 00:09:14,888
Michelle Cunningham.

236
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,473
(applause)

237
00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:17,807
Michael Dickens.

238
00:09:17,807 --> 00:09:19,225
Well, there's a hall
in Queanbeyan

239
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:20,727
called the Masonic Hall

240
00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:23,021
and that's where
all the kids go

241
00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:25,023
to graduate high school

242
00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:26,900
and you get an
intermediate certificate.

243
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:28,234
Sarah Kinsworth.

244
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,903
My mother came with me

245
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,030
and I thought it's a given,

246
00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,114
everybody was getting one.

247
00:09:33,114 --> 00:09:34,365
Brendan O'Connor.

248
00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:36,242
Very rarely
someone doesn't get

249
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:37,368
an intermediate certification.

250
00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:40,914
Andrew Lange.

251
00:09:40,914 --> 00:09:43,166
Finally, after about an hour...

252
00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:46,044
And George Lazenby...

253
00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:47,378
did not graduate.

254
00:09:47,378 --> 00:09:50,423
To the 1954 class of Goulburn,

255
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:53,176
congratulations
and farewell.

256
00:09:53,176 --> 00:09:55,095
♪

257
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:57,055
I was the only one
in the whole hall

258
00:09:57,055 --> 00:09:58,723
that didn't get a certificate.

259
00:09:58,723 --> 00:10:00,725
♪

260
00:10:00,725 --> 00:10:02,769
I'm thinking, "Jesus,

261
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:04,729
couldn't even get
an intermediate certificate."

262
00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:05,855
♪

263
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:08,441
I mean, I knew I wasn't
gonna be a public servant

264
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,401
or a lawyer or a doctor

265
00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:13,488
or anywhere I thought
you might need an education.

266
00:10:13,488 --> 00:10:15,782
♪

267
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,242
It's embarrassing.

268
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:19,160
I didn't give a damn
about the certificate

269
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,579
but it was the embarrassment
of not getting one

270
00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:23,039
that was hurting.

271
00:10:23,039 --> 00:10:29,003
♪

272
00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,296
If you didn't
graduate high school,

273
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:34,217
you had to redo the same
class over again for a year.

274
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:35,927
And I wasn't about to do that.

275
00:10:35,927 --> 00:10:39,806
So my uncle helped me out
and got me a job as a mechanic.

276
00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:43,351
There was no money in it.

277
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:46,187
I got paid very poorly.

278
00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:47,438
Look at this thing.

279
00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,357
You're gonna look amazing
going down the street in it.

280
00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:51,609
Imagine it; here,
come on, sit down, sit down.

281
00:10:51,609 --> 00:10:55,238
Look, you can
look out at the stars...

282
00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:57,448
And one day, I saw
the car salesmen

283
00:10:57,448 --> 00:10:59,617
were having much more fun
than us mechanics.

284
00:10:59,617 --> 00:11:01,119
Mount myself on this hood,

285
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:02,620
then I'll mount you
on the hood.

286
00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:03,997
I'd look out from
underneath the car

287
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:06,499
and I'd see the guys
chatting up the girls and...

288
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:07,876
Of course I come with the car.

289
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,670
I can come, I can sit in the
backseat the entire time.

290
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:13,131
We can both sit in
the backseat if you'd like.

291
00:11:13,131 --> 00:11:14,716
...going to work in a suit,

292
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:16,634
going to nice places for lunch,

293
00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:18,344
you know, having
a car to drive

294
00:11:18,344 --> 00:11:20,513
-and I'm thinking...
-What am I doing under here?

295
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:23,224
♪

296
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,517
So I said to the boss,

297
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:25,977
"I want to be a car salesman."

298
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,479
♪

299
00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:31,482
But then I couldn't
sell anything.

300
00:11:31,482 --> 00:11:33,318
No, I saw this
old girl in the shop

301
00:11:33,318 --> 00:11:34,903
and worked on her
more than most actually

302
00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:37,322
but, um, fair bit
of room in the back.

303
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:39,032
I can tell you like that.

304
00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:42,577
And, uh, you guys up to date
with your tetanus shots?

305
00:11:42,577 --> 00:11:44,245
I would, I'd get
ahead of the game there.

306
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,288
Look on the bright side,

307
00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:46,748
it comes in a bunch
of different colors.

308
00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:49,500
-What do you say?
-I don't think so.

309
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:50,710
Yeah.

310
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:52,879
Yeah, you don't want to rush
into a decision like this

311
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:55,840
but, um, I'll be here
if you change your mind.

312
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:57,759
♪

313
00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,302
I was hopeless.

314
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,304
I couldn't sell a bloody car.

315
00:12:01,304 --> 00:12:02,764
♪

316
00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:04,307
Comes in a few different colors.

317
00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:05,350
♪

318
00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,936
One guy there
who'd come out of university,

319
00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:09,854
-Johnny Horton.
-It's all yours!

320
00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:11,689
Here's the keys.

321
00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:13,733
Congratulations, beautiful!

322
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,193
He was selling
30 a month

323
00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:16,319
and he knew nothing about cars.

324
00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:17,862
Don't forget to
tell your friends,

325
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,197
Johnny Horton.

326
00:12:19,197 --> 00:12:21,699
♪

327
00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:23,534
(gunshots)

328
00:12:23,534 --> 00:12:25,245
(blows softly)

329
00:12:25,245 --> 00:12:26,746
(musical flourish)

330
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,582
That used to piss me off.

331
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:30,875
Oh, shit.

332
00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:34,045
Finally, the boss had an idea.

333
00:12:34,045 --> 00:12:35,380
He sent me down to Melbourne

334
00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:40,343
to a "How To Win Friends
and Influence People" course.

335
00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:42,553
And the only thing
I can remember learning

336
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:44,597
was "Listen, don't talk."

337
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:47,392
Listen to them,
see what they're interested in,

338
00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:49,227
and then only talk about that.

339
00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:50,645
Don't bother with the car.

340
00:12:50,645 --> 00:12:53,189
Listen, don't talk.

341
00:12:53,189 --> 00:12:54,857
I started listening
to the customers...

342
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:56,067
So anyway, I was
saying to my friend,

343
00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:57,235
it's gotta be the other leg

344
00:12:57,235 --> 00:12:58,236
but then Rhonda says to me,

345
00:12:58,236 --> 00:12:59,404
"What about the paintings?"

346
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:00,780
And then suddenly
I realized

347
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:03,283
I'm totally out of gas
and my pet turtle Shelly

348
00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,909
needs to use the toilet.

349
00:13:04,909 --> 00:13:06,077
Anyways, I'll take that one.

350
00:13:06,077 --> 00:13:07,954
So, Shelly, she's in a mood.

351
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:10,081
One time she almost
took off my pinky finger.

352
00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:11,082
But you know what?

353
00:13:11,082 --> 00:13:13,001
Pulled it back,
gave her a carrot,

354
00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:14,085
all was well.

355
00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:15,253
(laughing)

356
00:13:15,253 --> 00:13:16,879
God, what a twist.

357
00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:18,214
(laughing)

358
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:19,924
My sales went up to 30 a month.

359
00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,175
Excellent choice, sir.

360
00:13:21,175 --> 00:13:22,802
All right, you're gonna love it.

361
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:26,431
And so, the boss now knew
that I knew about cars

362
00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:28,308
and I also could sell them.

363
00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:31,060
Next thing, he promotes me
to used car salesman.

364
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:32,270
♪

365
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:33,646
(car horn honking)

366
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:36,774
The embassy people
had to get rid of their cars

367
00:13:36,774 --> 00:13:38,860
and they'd come to me,
I was the embassy guy.

368
00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:40,278
Au revoir.

369
00:13:40,278 --> 00:13:41,571
Dasvidaniya.

370
00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:42,739
♪

371
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,866
Ta-ta, Raju.

372
00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:46,117
My love to the wives.

373
00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:48,453
There's no way that I would
have known it at the time

374
00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,288
but getting out
from underneath that car

375
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:53,666
was putting me one step
closer to becoming James Bond.

376
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:55,710
Tell your friends
to stop by, say hi.

377
00:13:55,710 --> 00:13:58,421
George Lazenby,
used car manager.

378
00:13:58,421 --> 00:13:59,380
♪

379
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:10,683
♪

380
00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:11,768
I was feeling good.

381
00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:14,520
Selling cars,
going to embassy parties.

382
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,272
♪

383
00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:17,398
-Hey, sport.
-I started to get

384
00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:19,150
more sophisticated

385
00:14:19,150 --> 00:14:22,779
and understanding how
the classy guys operate.

386
00:14:22,779 --> 00:14:24,238
♪

387
00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:25,823
Champagne, sir?

388
00:14:25,823 --> 00:14:27,617
♪

389
00:14:27,617 --> 00:14:28,993
You don't mind a drop, do you?

390
00:14:28,993 --> 00:14:32,497
And this one night,
I was invited to a party

391
00:14:32,497 --> 00:14:34,624
and so I got
dressed up in a suit.

392
00:14:34,624 --> 00:14:38,461
♪

393
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:40,129
There was this one girl there...

394
00:14:40,129 --> 00:14:42,006
♪

395
00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:43,424
...and she stunned me.

396
00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:46,344
♪

397
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:47,804
Her name was Belinda.

398
00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:49,305
♪

399
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:51,474
But she was with a boyfriend.

400
00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:52,934
♪

401
00:14:52,934 --> 00:14:54,685
And I followed her
around all night,

402
00:14:54,685 --> 00:14:56,729
trying to say
something to her alone.

403
00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:57,688
♪

404
00:14:57,688 --> 00:15:00,566
But this guy, he was
stuck to her like that.

405
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:04,529
♪

406
00:15:04,529 --> 00:15:05,905
Caviar, sir?

407
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:08,324
It's Royal Beluga,
north of the Caspian.

408
00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:09,534
I'm good, thanks, mate.

409
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:12,203
I was trying to get a spot
where I could talk to her

410
00:15:12,203 --> 00:15:14,539
but he never left her side.

411
00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:15,915
Even when she went
to the bathroom,

412
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,416
he'd wait outside.

413
00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:19,085
♪

414
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:20,503
And when she was leaving,

415
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:22,755
I don't know what
made me do it, but...

416
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,715
-it just came out of me.
-Excuse me?

417
00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:27,552
I said, "I'm gonna
take you out next week."

418
00:15:27,552 --> 00:15:30,388
You know, I don't know
how long I got,

419
00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:31,347
let's get on with it.

420
00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:34,934
I am gonna take
you out next week.

421
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,395
And they both looked at me
like, "He's a loony,

422
00:15:37,395 --> 00:15:40,690
he's mad."

423
00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:41,941
♪

424
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,985
They didn't say a word,
they just left.

425
00:15:43,985 --> 00:15:44,861
♪

426
00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:46,946
So then I found out
where she worked

427
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,407
and I called her
up and I said,

428
00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:50,825
"I'd like to go out with you."

429
00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:54,829
She said, uh, "I don't go
out with strangers, I can't."

430
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:57,415
And I said, "Well,
how about Sunday?"

431
00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:58,958
I can take you out
during the day.

432
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:00,626
And she's working
as a dental nurse.

433
00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:01,586
-Uh, uh...
-What do you say?

434
00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:03,671
Uh, what's that;
I'll be right there.

435
00:16:03,671 --> 00:16:06,883
-Uh, okay.
-Okay, great, thanks.

436
00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:09,844
And she just said that
to get me off the line.

437
00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:13,139
She rang, I suppose,
20 times to cancel

438
00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:14,473
and I told all the guys,

439
00:16:14,473 --> 00:16:16,934
"If she rings,
I'm not here," you know?

440
00:16:16,934 --> 00:16:18,519
Because I knew she'd do that.

441
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:20,062
♪

442
00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:22,523
So I show up at
her place on Sunday.

443
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,817
♪

444
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,110
As soon as I got there...

445
00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:27,320
(man yelling)

446
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:28,237
♪

447
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:29,780
What do you think
you're doing, mate?

448
00:16:29,780 --> 00:16:31,199
...and her brother
jumps on me

449
00:16:31,199 --> 00:16:32,325
and he's got a headlock on me.

450
00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:33,492
You trying to fuck
my sister, huh?

451
00:16:33,492 --> 00:16:35,286
-Your sister?
-Yeah, do you wanna know

452
00:16:35,286 --> 00:16:36,954
what it feels like,
huh, fuck you, aye?

453
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,122
What the hell is wrong with you?

454
00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:39,207
Yeah, fuck you!

455
00:16:39,207 --> 00:16:41,292
And I'm trying to get
this headlock off me.

456
00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:43,211
Oh, come on, now!

457
00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:44,295
Deal with it!

458
00:16:44,295 --> 00:16:45,713
Her mother came out and said...

459
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:47,924
Greg, get off him.

460
00:16:47,924 --> 00:16:49,133
Sorry, Mum.

461
00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:51,219
♪

462
00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:52,386
Bloody hell.

463
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:53,512
♪

464
00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,348
Just, uh, wait here
a moment, love,

465
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,183
I'll get Belinda for you.

466
00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:58,392
Goodo.

467
00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:01,020
I get invited in
the house by the mother

468
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,147
and the dad and this other guy

469
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,024
are sitting in
the living room...

470
00:17:05,024 --> 00:17:06,317
G'day.

471
00:17:06,317 --> 00:17:08,444
You must be Belinda's dad.

472
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:09,946
You look just like her.

473
00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:10,863
I'm George.

474
00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:11,948
And I said to the other guy,

475
00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:13,824
"Jesus, mate, you look
like Bob Menzies,

476
00:17:13,824 --> 00:17:15,660
the prime minister."

477
00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:18,621
And it was the
prime minister of Australia.

478
00:17:18,621 --> 00:17:19,956
(laughing)

479
00:17:19,956 --> 00:17:22,500
It's unbelievable.

480
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:23,793
Anyone ever told you that?

481
00:17:23,793 --> 00:17:28,589
♪

482
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:29,924
Oh my God.

483
00:17:29,924 --> 00:17:30,967
♪

484
00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:33,761
-I got you these.
-Oh.

485
00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:35,513
Sorry, they're a
little roughed up.

486
00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:37,139
Your brother...

487
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:38,349
Uh...

488
00:17:38,349 --> 00:17:39,976
These are lovely.

489
00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:40,851
♪

490
00:17:40,851 --> 00:17:43,020
I told you I was
gonna ask you out.

491
00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:44,605
You did.

492
00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:46,065
And here I am.

493
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,359
Here you are, okay.

494
00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,695
Um...

495
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:52,488
Bye, Dad, bye, Bob.

496
00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:53,614
Let's go.

497
00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:56,325
-What, his name's Bob too?
-Of course it is.

498
00:17:56,325 --> 00:17:58,578
-What a coincidence.
-What are we doing?

499
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:00,955
Oh, we're just going
up the river for a swim.

500
00:18:00,955 --> 00:18:03,040
Then she said, "Up the river?"

501
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:04,792
"Yeah, it's a
great river up here,

502
00:18:04,792 --> 00:18:06,252
we can go for a swim."

503
00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:08,212
I wanted to get
her alone somewhere.

504
00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:10,548
♪

505
00:18:10,548 --> 00:18:12,550
So is this where
you take all the girls?

506
00:18:12,550 --> 00:18:15,845
Hey, what kind of guy
do you think I am?

507
00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:17,138
No, this place
is special to me.

508
00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:20,266
I used to come here
when I was a kid.

509
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:21,392
It's beautiful, isn't it?

510
00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:22,727
Yeah.

511
00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:25,980
Yeah, it's nice
and private, you know?

512
00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:27,940
We can do pretty much anything.

513
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:31,652
Can you unzip me?

514
00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:34,155
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.

515
00:18:43,748 --> 00:18:45,499
So...

516
00:18:45,499 --> 00:18:47,543
shall we?

517
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:52,840
Well, you don't actually
have to go for a swim.

518
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:54,508
Now, Belinda, hang on.

519
00:18:56,510 --> 00:18:58,512
I thought she'd be too
afraid to go in the water.

520
00:18:58,512 --> 00:19:00,389
She just took off in the water.

521
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:01,724
-Are you coming?
-When I said swimming

522
00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:02,933
I didn't think we'd actually...

523
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,727
Come on.

524
00:19:04,727 --> 00:19:06,103
I'm just a little rusty.

525
00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:07,855
Um...oh God.

526
00:19:07,855 --> 00:19:10,566
Go in, go!

527
00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:12,109
Come on, let's go up the river.

528
00:19:12,109 --> 00:19:14,445
-Come on.
-And I took off after her

529
00:19:14,445 --> 00:19:15,780
and the fact is,

530
00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:17,948
I was about to quit chasing her

531
00:19:17,948 --> 00:19:19,450
when she stopped

532
00:19:19,450 --> 00:19:21,744
and she told me if I couldn't
have kept up with her,

533
00:19:21,744 --> 00:19:23,663
she'd never see me again.

534
00:19:24,914 --> 00:19:27,541
-It's nice, huh?
-It's really nice.

535
00:19:27,541 --> 00:19:29,502
♪

536
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:31,170
So everything was working out.

537
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:34,465
♪

538
00:19:34,465 --> 00:19:36,217
We started seeing each other.

539
00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:43,933
♪

540
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:46,727
I had a date with her
at night three times

541
00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:48,229
and the third one...

542
00:19:48,229 --> 00:19:49,438
♪

543
00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:51,816
I like your perfume, that's...

544
00:19:51,816 --> 00:19:53,234
-It's really nice.
-It smells good.

545
00:19:53,234 --> 00:19:55,277
-Yeah.
-Thank you.

546
00:19:55,277 --> 00:19:56,862
I like that.

547
00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:59,490
I'm being nice to her in the car

548
00:19:59,490 --> 00:20:00,866
and she says,

549
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:02,576
"Are we gonna do it or not?"

550
00:20:02,576 --> 00:20:04,787
♪

551
00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:07,665
Oh God, my heart
started going--

552
00:20:07,665 --> 00:20:08,999
I was just doing
the right thing,

553
00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,418
I didn't wanna blow it.

554
00:20:10,418 --> 00:20:12,920
Um...so, now?

555
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,839
♪

556
00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:16,257
Yeah.

557
00:20:16,257 --> 00:20:23,889
♪

558
00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:25,516
I thought, "This is her.

559
00:20:25,516 --> 00:20:27,393
I'm doing it with her."

560
00:20:27,393 --> 00:20:29,228
And my erection...

561
00:20:30,938 --> 00:20:32,898
...just went down.

562
00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:35,067
And I thought, "Oh my God,
what's happening?

563
00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:36,944
This never happened before."

564
00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:38,195
You okay?

565
00:20:38,195 --> 00:20:41,198
Just give me one second,
I'm gonna get some fresh air.

566
00:20:41,198 --> 00:20:42,408
Okay.

567
00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:43,534
♪

568
00:20:43,534 --> 00:20:45,536
Go out the next night,
the same thing.

569
00:20:45,536 --> 00:20:47,329
Go out the next night,
the same thing.

570
00:20:47,329 --> 00:20:48,497
And I'd want to
spank it, saying,

571
00:20:48,497 --> 00:20:49,665
"What's the matter with you?"

572
00:20:49,665 --> 00:20:52,626
because it had never
done it before, you know?

573
00:20:52,626 --> 00:20:54,545
Who are you talking to?

574
00:20:54,545 --> 00:20:56,213
Oh, uh, nobody.

575
00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:58,507
Uh, I'll be there in a minute.

576
00:20:58,507 --> 00:20:59,550
♪

577
00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:00,801
I was too in love with her,

578
00:21:00,801 --> 00:21:02,386
too fascinated with her.

579
00:21:02,386 --> 00:21:03,804
When you're in love,

580
00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:07,057
you're intimidated
by these--by the love.

581
00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:08,350
I don't know what it is.

582
00:21:08,350 --> 00:21:09,310
♪

583
00:21:09,310 --> 00:21:11,395
I didn't know what to do.

584
00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:12,396
And she says...

585
00:21:12,396 --> 00:21:13,773
So my boyfriend--

586
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:17,902
or my ex-boyfriend
is coming into town.

587
00:21:17,902 --> 00:21:20,571
And she was gonna
go to this Marine ball.

588
00:21:20,571 --> 00:21:23,574
He's invited me
to this Marine ball.

589
00:21:23,574 --> 00:21:25,951
♪

590
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:27,161
-And I said...
-You go with him

591
00:21:27,161 --> 00:21:28,829
and I'll never see you again.

592
00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:30,748
♪

593
00:21:30,748 --> 00:21:32,833
-And she said...
-I have to go.

594
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:40,966
♪

595
00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,259
Can I tell you a secret?

596
00:21:42,259 --> 00:21:45,930
♪

597
00:21:45,930 --> 00:21:48,766
I didn't get an erection.

598
00:21:48,766 --> 00:21:51,811
So I went to the pub
and got totally drunk.

599
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:54,438
Lock me up and...

600
00:21:54,438 --> 00:21:56,565
Lock me up,
throw away the key

601
00:21:56,565 --> 00:21:59,109
because my dick
couldn't get hard.

602
00:21:59,109 --> 00:22:02,530
Oh, okay, that's a crime, is it?

603
00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:04,573
That's a crime?

604
00:22:04,573 --> 00:22:06,283
Fuck off!

605
00:22:06,283 --> 00:22:07,993
And I kept thinking
about Belinda

606
00:22:07,993 --> 00:22:09,620
and her boyfriend.

607
00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:12,331
Belinda's boyfriend
was in the Australian Army.

608
00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:13,833
You can get
pretty bored sometimes.

609
00:22:13,833 --> 00:22:16,544
You know, all the guys
are 18, 19, 20

610
00:22:16,544 --> 00:22:18,963
so they can get a hard-on
at the drop of a hat.

611
00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:20,965
♪

612
00:22:20,965 --> 00:22:23,008
And they have this competition.

613
00:22:23,008 --> 00:22:24,885
They tie the boots together

614
00:22:24,885 --> 00:22:26,679
and then hang them
on the penis

615
00:22:26,679 --> 00:22:28,973
and see who can hang
the most boots on the penis

616
00:22:28,973 --> 00:22:30,391
before it goes down.

617
00:22:30,391 --> 00:22:31,475
♪

618
00:22:31,475 --> 00:22:33,978
Well, Belinda's boyfriend
was famous for winning

619
00:22:33,978 --> 00:22:35,563
that competition.

620
00:22:35,563 --> 00:22:37,273
(cheering)

621
00:22:37,273 --> 00:22:41,485
♪

622
00:22:41,485 --> 00:22:43,153
So I was in a torturous state.

623
00:22:43,153 --> 00:22:44,113
♪

624
00:22:44,113 --> 00:22:45,531
I'm in a torturous state.

625
00:22:45,531 --> 00:22:46,782
And I got so drunk

626
00:22:46,782 --> 00:22:48,409
and my mates wouldn't
even talk to me.

627
00:22:48,409 --> 00:22:49,493
♪

628
00:22:49,493 --> 00:22:50,828
And I'm leaning
against the bar...

629
00:22:50,828 --> 00:22:52,621
(door opening, bell ringing)

630
00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:54,665
...and all I remember
is this white gown

631
00:22:54,665 --> 00:22:56,083
coming through the door.

632
00:22:56,083 --> 00:22:57,626
♪

633
00:22:57,626 --> 00:22:58,878
George?

634
00:22:58,878 --> 00:23:01,130
♪

635
00:23:02,631 --> 00:23:03,924
♪

636
00:23:03,924 --> 00:23:05,009
Next thing I remember

637
00:23:05,009 --> 00:23:06,719
was waking up
in the morning.

638
00:23:06,719 --> 00:23:11,515
♪

639
00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:12,558
There was a note.

640
00:23:12,558 --> 00:23:14,852
♪

641
00:23:14,852 --> 00:23:15,853
"You were fantastic.

642
00:23:15,853 --> 00:23:18,272
I've taken the car,
I'll see you for lunch."

643
00:23:18,272 --> 00:23:21,275
♪

644
00:23:21,275 --> 00:23:23,485
I was fantastic?

645
00:23:23,485 --> 00:23:25,279
And I don't even remember it

646
00:23:25,279 --> 00:23:27,615
but I was okay from then on.

647
00:23:27,615 --> 00:23:29,116
I was fantastic.

648
00:23:29,116 --> 00:23:37,041
♪

649
00:23:37,041 --> 00:23:38,626
I totally fell in love.

650
00:23:38,626 --> 00:23:40,336
♪

651
00:23:40,336 --> 00:23:42,880
She was the...

652
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:46,175
My idea of a perfect woman

653
00:23:46,175 --> 00:23:47,593
was her.

654
00:23:47,593 --> 00:23:50,012
♪

655
00:23:50,012 --> 00:23:52,556
My life was changing
because she was operating

656
00:23:52,556 --> 00:23:54,725
on a different level than I was.

657
00:23:54,725 --> 00:23:57,770
My family lived day-to-day.

658
00:23:57,770 --> 00:23:59,563
If they had a bad day,

659
00:23:59,563 --> 00:24:02,316
they wouldn't have
money for the next day.

660
00:24:02,316 --> 00:24:04,068
She was high society.

661
00:24:04,068 --> 00:24:07,071
Like, her mother's father
was governor-general

662
00:24:07,071 --> 00:24:10,574
of New South Wales, lived in
a big castle down in Sydney.

663
00:24:10,574 --> 00:24:12,242
I remember we had
a trip planned,

664
00:24:12,242 --> 00:24:15,079
it was a black tie,
we go to dinner,

665
00:24:15,079 --> 00:24:19,166
and then the father said,
"You're not invited, George."

666
00:24:19,166 --> 00:24:22,795
In other words, I had to stay
at the house while Belinda went.

667
00:24:22,795 --> 00:24:26,548
And Belinda looked at me
and looked at her dad and said,

668
00:24:26,548 --> 00:24:29,635
"I'm not going
unless George goes."

669
00:24:29,635 --> 00:24:31,553
So he left us both there.

670
00:24:31,553 --> 00:24:34,056
He saw that I had
some control over her.

671
00:24:34,056 --> 00:24:36,183
♪

672
00:24:36,183 --> 00:24:37,935
He didn't like me.

673
00:24:37,935 --> 00:24:41,271
He, in fact, encouraged
her to go to London

674
00:24:41,271 --> 00:24:42,439
to get away from me

675
00:24:42,439 --> 00:24:46,402
for three months
and see what happens.

676
00:24:46,402 --> 00:24:49,196
I've got the best job
that I could imagine,

677
00:24:49,196 --> 00:24:52,157
I've got the girl
I wanted in my life,

678
00:24:52,157 --> 00:24:55,077
and the most
important thing was her,

679
00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:58,414
and she took my heart and
went to England with it.

680
00:24:58,414 --> 00:25:00,916
♪

681
00:25:00,916 --> 00:25:04,962
I thought, "Three months,
that's a long time."

682
00:25:04,962 --> 00:25:09,550
Next day, when she was out
in the ocean somewhere...

683
00:25:09,550 --> 00:25:11,427
Man, I feel sick, she's gonna--

684
00:25:11,427 --> 00:25:13,095
The salesmen were telling me,

685
00:25:13,095 --> 00:25:16,056
"Girls go crazy when
they get out in the ocean."

686
00:25:16,056 --> 00:25:17,016
All my mates.

687
00:25:17,016 --> 00:25:19,059
She's probably got
another fill already.

688
00:25:19,059 --> 00:25:20,936
Oh, come on.

689
00:25:20,936 --> 00:25:22,438
♪

690
00:25:22,438 --> 00:25:26,150
We started writing to
each other after she left.

691
00:25:26,150 --> 00:25:30,320
I was getting
five letters a day.

692
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:32,031
Then four.

693
00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:34,658
And then three.

694
00:25:34,658 --> 00:25:37,494
And all of a sudden,

695
00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:39,163
no letters.

696
00:25:39,163 --> 00:25:40,664
I was going to the post office.

697
00:25:40,664 --> 00:25:42,332
"Hey, you must be mixed up."

698
00:25:42,332 --> 00:25:45,836
"Uh-uh, we haven't got
any letters for you."

699
00:25:45,836 --> 00:25:48,172
I knew that she
had someone else,

700
00:25:48,172 --> 00:25:51,008
and I wanted to go over
there and get her back.

701
00:25:51,008 --> 00:25:53,844
♪

702
00:25:53,844 --> 00:25:56,305
(boat whistle)

703
00:25:58,557 --> 00:26:02,102
♪

704
00:26:02,102 --> 00:26:05,272
I got on a boat to
Tilbury, England,

705
00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:08,192
and I was four
levels below water,

706
00:26:08,192 --> 00:26:12,029
in bunks with three
other guys from Brisbane.

707
00:26:12,029 --> 00:26:14,823
But the darn thing went
around Australia first.

708
00:26:14,823 --> 00:26:16,950
♪

709
00:26:16,950 --> 00:26:19,787
I went to Melbourne,
Adelaide, Perth,

710
00:26:19,787 --> 00:26:23,707
Singapore, and then
over to Delhi,

711
00:26:23,707 --> 00:26:26,460
and then over to Port Said,

712
00:26:26,460 --> 00:26:29,296
and there's another place
further up on the left,

713
00:26:29,296 --> 00:26:31,757
probably it's in a war now,
I don't know what it is.

714
00:26:31,757 --> 00:26:37,262
And then we hit Italy,
Marseille, and Gibraltar,

715
00:26:37,262 --> 00:26:39,264
and then finally Tilbury.

716
00:26:39,264 --> 00:26:47,272
♪

717
00:26:47,272 --> 00:26:49,149
When I first landed in London,

718
00:26:49,149 --> 00:26:51,902
I expected to see Belinda there.

719
00:26:51,902 --> 00:26:53,779
Every port I pulled into,

720
00:26:53,779 --> 00:26:57,241
I'd write her saying
where I am, where I'll be,

721
00:26:57,241 --> 00:27:00,619
telling her how in love
I was and everything else.

722
00:27:00,619 --> 00:27:03,205
But here I am with
two big suitcases

723
00:27:03,205 --> 00:27:04,790
and no Belinda.

724
00:27:08,627 --> 00:27:10,504
She wasn't there.

725
00:27:10,504 --> 00:27:14,466
I had her address, but there was
no one that answered the door.

726
00:27:14,466 --> 00:27:18,262
I waited outside
where she lived

727
00:27:18,262 --> 00:27:19,638
until the pubs closed.

728
00:27:19,638 --> 00:27:21,265
I kept going to the
pub and coming back,

729
00:27:21,265 --> 00:27:24,935
my suitcases were just
left there on the doorstep,

730
00:27:24,935 --> 00:27:26,937
and she didn't come back.

731
00:27:26,937 --> 00:27:34,444
♪

732
00:27:34,444 --> 00:27:36,113
(pounding)

733
00:27:36,113 --> 00:27:37,447
Belinda!

734
00:27:37,447 --> 00:27:46,790
♪

735
00:27:46,790 --> 00:27:48,041
Then I pulled a cab down,

736
00:27:48,041 --> 00:27:50,586
I said, "I need a room,
I need a room somewhere."

737
00:27:50,586 --> 00:27:53,797
And the cabbie said, "I know
exactly where to take you."

738
00:27:53,797 --> 00:27:56,508
But I had a "g'day, mate,"
Australian accent...

739
00:27:56,508 --> 00:27:59,303
♪

740
00:27:59,303 --> 00:28:00,721
...so he took me
to Earl's Court,

741
00:28:00,721 --> 00:28:03,473
got me a room where you sleep
with the doorknob in your mouth,

742
00:28:03,473 --> 00:28:06,727
and it's so bloody small.

743
00:28:06,727 --> 00:28:08,979
I kept thinking about Belinda.

744
00:28:08,979 --> 00:28:10,147
Where is she?

745
00:28:10,147 --> 00:28:11,481
Automatically, my mind's going,

746
00:28:11,481 --> 00:28:14,359
"She's sleeping somewhere
with some guy, blah-blah-blah."

747
00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:17,321
♪

748
00:28:17,321 --> 00:28:18,488
(sighs)

749
00:28:18,488 --> 00:28:20,574
'Cause there's no way
of finding anybody

750
00:28:20,574 --> 00:28:21,825
in England in those days.

751
00:28:21,825 --> 00:28:24,077
In the '60s,
you couldn't find anybody.

752
00:28:24,077 --> 00:28:25,287
You didn't have cell phones,

753
00:28:25,287 --> 00:28:27,664
you didn't have
any way of doing it.

754
00:28:27,664 --> 00:28:29,499
Does she look familiar?

755
00:28:29,499 --> 00:28:31,960
♪

756
00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:35,505
I'd come all this way,
and she wasn't there.

757
00:28:35,505 --> 00:28:38,133
I'm thinking, "Oh my God,
what have I done?

758
00:28:39,968 --> 00:28:41,219
About three months later,

759
00:28:41,219 --> 00:28:43,722
I was in the Earl's Court
business club,

760
00:28:43,722 --> 00:28:47,184
and I was alone
feeling sorry for myself

761
00:28:47,184 --> 00:28:49,061
when a guy from
my hometown said,

762
00:28:49,061 --> 00:28:52,189
"I just saw Belinda
down the road in a pub."

763
00:28:52,189 --> 00:28:53,565
I said, "What?"

764
00:28:53,565 --> 00:28:55,734
My heart starts going like this.

765
00:28:55,734 --> 00:29:00,364
♪

766
00:29:00,364 --> 00:29:02,032
And my heart stopped.

767
00:29:02,032 --> 00:29:05,410
There she was, and she's with
the whole Oxford cricket team,

768
00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:08,664
and her boyfriend is the captain
of the Oxford cricket team,

769
00:29:08,664 --> 00:29:09,915
I found out.

770
00:29:09,915 --> 00:29:18,048
♪

771
00:29:18,048 --> 00:29:20,050
I want to talk to you outside.

772
00:29:20,050 --> 00:29:22,344
And she says, "Whatever
you got to say to me,

773
00:29:22,344 --> 00:29:23,887
say to me here."

774
00:29:23,887 --> 00:29:26,098
No, I want to talk
to you outside.

775
00:29:26,098 --> 00:29:27,432
You heard what she said.

776
00:29:27,432 --> 00:29:28,976
My fist came out, bang,

777
00:29:28,976 --> 00:29:30,811
even before he got the line out.

778
00:29:30,811 --> 00:29:33,230
I don't know,
it was just instinctive.

779
00:29:33,230 --> 00:29:34,356
Hey!

780
00:29:34,356 --> 00:29:39,236
♪

781
00:29:39,236 --> 00:29:40,612
All right, get in.

782
00:29:40,612 --> 00:29:42,572
♪

783
00:29:42,572 --> 00:29:46,076
Went around the other
side of the car...

784
00:29:46,076 --> 00:29:47,577
and she jumped out.

785
00:29:47,577 --> 00:29:50,122
And all these cricketers
are coming out towards me.

786
00:29:50,122 --> 00:29:51,581
I said, "Oh, shit.

787
00:29:51,581 --> 00:29:54,251
I'm gonna get beat up
if I hang out here."

788
00:29:54,251 --> 00:30:00,424
♪

789
00:30:02,134 --> 00:30:03,802
I was confounded,

790
00:30:03,802 --> 00:30:06,096
devastated, lost.

791
00:30:06,096 --> 00:30:08,306
I didn't know what to do.

792
00:30:08,306 --> 00:30:10,183
And then it was only
a few weeks later

793
00:30:10,183 --> 00:30:12,519
that I didn't have any money,

794
00:30:12,519 --> 00:30:15,105
and so I went down to
where the car dealers are

795
00:30:15,105 --> 00:30:17,107
and I said, "I need a job."

796
00:30:17,107 --> 00:30:19,860
I was almost concluding
that this relationship

797
00:30:19,860 --> 00:30:21,278
wasn't meant to be,

798
00:30:21,278 --> 00:30:23,572
and I was going through
the withdrawal of that,

799
00:30:23,572 --> 00:30:26,908
and a couple of days
later, I got a letter.

800
00:30:26,908 --> 00:30:29,953
She wrote, "We can see
each other platonically."

801
00:30:29,953 --> 00:30:32,748
"Platonically,"
what the hell does that mean?

802
00:30:32,748 --> 00:30:35,459
I think it means emotionally,

803
00:30:35,459 --> 00:30:38,128
like spiritually,

804
00:30:38,128 --> 00:30:40,630
like seeing each
other eye-to-eye.

805
00:30:40,630 --> 00:30:43,383
I don't think that's right.

806
00:30:43,383 --> 00:30:44,551
"Platonically"?

807
00:30:44,551 --> 00:30:46,928
Pla--platonically...

808
00:30:46,928 --> 00:30:49,973
-Yeah.
-She underlined it.

809
00:30:49,973 --> 00:30:51,058
That's good.

810
00:30:51,058 --> 00:30:52,809
I said, "Well,
better than nothing."

811
00:30:52,809 --> 00:30:56,313
She said, "We can see
parts of England together."

812
00:30:56,313 --> 00:30:57,355
My lady.

813
00:30:57,355 --> 00:30:58,815
And I went and asked the driver

814
00:30:58,815 --> 00:30:59,983
who delivers cars,

815
00:30:59,983 --> 00:31:01,860
"Where's the furthest car
you got this weekend?"

816
00:31:01,860 --> 00:31:04,613
I said, "I'll take it for you,
I'll do it for nothing."

817
00:31:04,613 --> 00:31:06,865
Said, "Bristol,"
which is not a--

818
00:31:06,865 --> 00:31:09,326
it's not a tourist resort.

819
00:31:09,326 --> 00:31:11,328
-Bristol, here we come.
-Yeah.

820
00:31:11,328 --> 00:31:12,788
Can't wait, I hear good things.

821
00:31:12,788 --> 00:31:15,582
She said, "I'll go...
platonically."

822
00:31:15,582 --> 00:31:17,292
Platonically.

823
00:31:17,292 --> 00:31:18,835
I know what that means.

824
00:31:18,835 --> 00:31:21,088
Always did, didn't
have to look it up.

825
00:31:21,088 --> 00:31:24,758
This "platonic" word
was starting to bug me.

826
00:31:24,758 --> 00:31:26,093
You look lovely.

827
00:31:26,093 --> 00:31:29,179
Oh, thank you.

828
00:31:29,179 --> 00:31:32,099
We go over there and
we're having dinner.

829
00:31:32,099 --> 00:31:34,351
I could smell her.

830
00:31:34,351 --> 00:31:36,019
Here, you're falling behind.

831
00:31:36,019 --> 00:31:37,771
Oh.

832
00:31:37,771 --> 00:31:40,857
Oh, that's--that's
fine, thank you.

833
00:31:40,857 --> 00:31:43,318
Finish her off.

834
00:31:43,318 --> 00:31:44,361
It was something else.

835
00:31:44,361 --> 00:31:46,446
You know, just smell
and taste and touch

836
00:31:46,446 --> 00:31:49,533
has got a lot to do
with who you're with

837
00:31:49,533 --> 00:31:50,659
and how much you love.

838
00:31:50,659 --> 00:31:52,536
God, if it gets any
livelier up here,

839
00:31:52,536 --> 00:31:54,204
a funeral's gonna break out.

840
00:31:54,204 --> 00:31:56,540
(laughing)

841
00:31:56,540 --> 00:31:58,291
Tonight was, um,

842
00:31:58,291 --> 00:31:59,793
it's really nice.

843
00:31:59,793 --> 00:32:02,462
It was, wasn't it?

844
00:32:02,462 --> 00:32:06,716
-This is me.
-This is me, so...

845
00:32:06,716 --> 00:32:08,844
-Good night.
-Good night.

846
00:32:08,844 --> 00:32:17,811
♪

847
00:32:17,811 --> 00:32:19,229
I'll see you in the morning.

848
00:32:19,229 --> 00:32:21,565
-See you in the morning.
-Okay.

849
00:32:21,565 --> 00:32:22,566
Okay.

850
00:32:22,566 --> 00:32:25,527
What she didn't know is
that I had stolen a key

851
00:32:25,527 --> 00:32:28,905
to her room from
the reception desk,

852
00:32:28,905 --> 00:32:32,534
and so I'd just give her
time to get tucked in

853
00:32:32,534 --> 00:32:35,704
and be naked, hopefully,

854
00:32:35,704 --> 00:32:37,581
then I'll go to her room

855
00:32:37,581 --> 00:32:39,875
and surprise her.

856
00:32:39,875 --> 00:32:42,294
I'm thinking, "I can't wait
to get back with her,

857
00:32:42,294 --> 00:32:43,712
I can't wait."

858
00:32:43,712 --> 00:32:47,716
♪

859
00:32:47,716 --> 00:32:50,427
Next thing, my stomach
starts to rumble.

860
00:32:54,097 --> 00:32:56,516
(flatulence)

861
00:32:59,186 --> 00:33:03,231
And I got the worst
diarrhea I have ever had.

862
00:33:03,231 --> 00:33:17,329
♪

863
00:33:17,329 --> 00:33:18,663
Every time I walked to the door,

864
00:33:18,663 --> 00:33:20,790
I had to turn around and
go back to the bathroom.

865
00:33:20,790 --> 00:33:22,792
Every time I walked to the door.

866
00:33:22,792 --> 00:33:29,966
♪

867
00:33:29,966 --> 00:33:32,469
I just was sick,
and then I'd wash myself

868
00:33:32,469 --> 00:33:35,305
and start to go back
to the door again.

869
00:33:35,305 --> 00:33:39,434
Nope, nope, you are
gonna man up and...

870
00:33:39,434 --> 00:33:41,269
(flatulence)

871
00:33:41,269 --> 00:33:43,939
♪

872
00:33:43,939 --> 00:33:46,358
(mumbling)

873
00:33:46,358 --> 00:33:48,693
♪

874
00:33:48,693 --> 00:33:51,238
I did this about
six or seven times.

875
00:33:51,238 --> 00:33:53,281
♪

876
00:33:53,281 --> 00:33:54,950
Wait, six or seven times?

877
00:33:54,950 --> 00:33:57,535
Didn't you think that maybe
you should give up after one?

878
00:33:57,535 --> 00:34:00,538
Well, no, I was, you know,
bathing myself well

879
00:34:00,538 --> 00:34:04,042
and hoping I could go out.

880
00:34:04,042 --> 00:34:05,502
You know, it'd be
embarrassing there

881
00:34:05,502 --> 00:34:08,713
if you were in the
middle of it and, uh,

882
00:34:08,713 --> 00:34:11,383
getting brown smoke
out of your butt.

883
00:34:11,383 --> 00:34:14,886
♪

884
00:34:14,886 --> 00:34:16,513
(flatulence)

885
00:34:16,513 --> 00:34:26,898
♪

886
00:34:26,898 --> 00:34:28,233
-Oh.
-Oh, thank you.

887
00:34:28,233 --> 00:34:30,402
Saw her next morning
for breakfast,

888
00:34:30,402 --> 00:34:31,695
and she said to me...

889
00:34:31,695 --> 00:34:32,988
I'd bet anything

890
00:34:32,988 --> 00:34:36,700
you would've tried to get
into my room last night.

891
00:34:36,700 --> 00:34:40,203
You've changed.

892
00:34:40,203 --> 00:34:41,955
What can I say?

893
00:34:41,955 --> 00:34:43,331
I have.

894
00:34:43,331 --> 00:34:49,629
♪

895
00:34:49,629 --> 00:34:51,339
This was fun.

896
00:34:51,339 --> 00:34:53,758
Yeah, it was.

897
00:34:53,758 --> 00:34:55,969
Thanks for coming.

898
00:34:55,969 --> 00:34:57,846
I'm very glad that I did.

899
00:34:57,846 --> 00:35:00,223
We were driving back to London,

900
00:35:00,223 --> 00:35:02,767
and we're on the
motorway, the M4...

901
00:35:02,767 --> 00:35:04,728
Wow, it's really coming down.

902
00:35:04,728 --> 00:35:06,187
It was a dark night and rainy.

903
00:35:06,187 --> 00:35:08,690
I'll just pull over up here
just to be on the safe side.

904
00:35:08,690 --> 00:35:10,567
And I could just see
the lights of London,

905
00:35:10,567 --> 00:35:11,901
I said, "I'm gonna do it."

906
00:35:11,901 --> 00:35:14,529
And I went down
under the freeway.

907
00:35:14,529 --> 00:35:22,078
♪

908
00:35:22,078 --> 00:35:23,830
Grabbed hold of her.

909
00:35:23,830 --> 00:35:25,749
♪

910
00:35:25,749 --> 00:35:27,375
And we made love.

911
00:35:27,375 --> 00:35:32,005
♪

912
00:35:32,005 --> 00:35:34,132
Afterwards,
I was looking at her,

913
00:35:34,132 --> 00:35:35,550
and she was sort of...

914
00:35:35,550 --> 00:35:37,510
up against the window crying.

915
00:35:37,510 --> 00:35:39,262
(sniffling)

916
00:35:39,262 --> 00:35:45,685
♪

917
00:35:45,685 --> 00:35:47,187
Belinda.

918
00:35:47,187 --> 00:35:49,439
♪

919
00:35:49,439 --> 00:35:51,399
Next thing she turns
around and comes at me,

920
00:35:51,399 --> 00:35:53,777
and I put my hand up,
I thought she was gonna hit me

921
00:35:53,777 --> 00:35:56,196
'cause she was crying.

922
00:35:56,196 --> 00:35:58,448
I love you.

923
00:35:58,448 --> 00:36:01,576
I still love you.

924
00:36:01,576 --> 00:36:03,828
Move in with me.

925
00:36:03,828 --> 00:36:06,456
I can't, my dad would kill me.

926
00:36:06,456 --> 00:36:09,876
♪

927
00:36:09,876 --> 00:36:11,753
He's not gonna be there.

928
00:36:11,753 --> 00:36:15,006
This place isn't big enough.

929
00:36:15,006 --> 00:36:20,053
You'd have had my
dad to live with you?

930
00:36:20,053 --> 00:36:22,097
I'd put up with him if you--

931
00:36:22,097 --> 00:36:23,264
Come here.

932
00:36:23,264 --> 00:36:33,650
♪

933
00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:36,569
I love you.

934
00:36:36,569 --> 00:36:39,948
I love you, too.

935
00:36:39,948 --> 00:36:43,034
-Platonically.
-Platonically!

936
00:36:43,034 --> 00:36:48,790
♪

937
00:36:48,790 --> 00:36:49,916
Ahh.

938
00:36:49,916 --> 00:36:51,167
I love you so much.

939
00:36:51,167 --> 00:36:52,585
I love you.

940
00:36:52,585 --> 00:36:54,879
All right, I'll see you tonight.

941
00:36:54,879 --> 00:36:56,131
♪

942
00:36:56,131 --> 00:36:58,717
Have a great day, honey!

943
00:36:58,717 --> 00:36:59,926
She moved into my place,

944
00:36:59,926 --> 00:37:02,846
and I thought I'd died
and gone to heaven.

945
00:37:02,846 --> 00:37:06,808
That's why I came to
London, was for her.

946
00:37:06,808 --> 00:37:10,103
I'd moved on from
a little car dealership

947
00:37:10,103 --> 00:37:13,356
to Mercedes-Benz in Park Lane,

948
00:37:13,356 --> 00:37:15,525
and there was a guy
who was a photographer,

949
00:37:15,525 --> 00:37:18,987
Charles Jenkins,
he walks in one day

950
00:37:18,987 --> 00:37:21,656
and we're looking at this
particular Mercedes, he says,

951
00:37:21,656 --> 00:37:23,366
"Look, I'll tell you what..."

952
00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:24,701
I'll buy this off you

953
00:37:24,701 --> 00:37:27,495
if you let me take
some pictures of you.

954
00:37:27,495 --> 00:37:30,540
I said, "Hello, I got
a homosexual on my hands."

955
00:37:30,540 --> 00:37:32,751
Why would anyone want
to take pictures of a man?

956
00:37:32,751 --> 00:37:34,085
That's how naive I was.

957
00:37:34,085 --> 00:37:37,255
So, I sent Belinda along.

958
00:37:37,255 --> 00:37:38,548
Then he comes back to me,

959
00:37:38,548 --> 00:37:40,800
he took pictures of her
'cause he's polite...

960
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:43,720
No, you fool, I want to
take some pictures of you.

961
00:37:43,720 --> 00:37:45,388
I said, "What are
you talking about?"

962
00:37:45,388 --> 00:37:47,891
I didn't know there was
such a thing as male models.

963
00:37:47,891 --> 00:37:50,226
I just thought people took
pictures of people smoking

964
00:37:50,226 --> 00:37:52,812
or on horses or whatever,
that's how it happened.

965
00:37:52,812 --> 00:37:54,272
He said, "You're in."

966
00:37:54,272 --> 00:37:57,567
You know, they're looking
for men like you.

967
00:37:57,567 --> 00:38:00,153
You know, rugged guys.

968
00:38:00,153 --> 00:38:02,197
Rugged guys are in now.

969
00:38:02,197 --> 00:38:04,574
Really?

970
00:38:04,574 --> 00:38:06,785
-Huh.
-Yeah.

971
00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:09,037
Oh, George, you look fabulous.

972
00:38:09,037 --> 00:38:10,622
Let's have another one.

973
00:38:10,622 --> 00:38:12,916
Oh, you were born to do this.

974
00:38:12,916 --> 00:38:14,918
What do you call
them, head faces?

975
00:38:14,918 --> 00:38:17,462
These are your
head shots, darling.

976
00:38:17,462 --> 00:38:20,799
-Head shots?
-Head shots, of your face.

977
00:38:20,799 --> 00:38:22,675
He says, "There's
a lot of money in it.

978
00:38:22,675 --> 00:38:25,220
Take these pictures down
to Scotty's Modeling Agency

979
00:38:25,220 --> 00:38:26,513
in Bond Street."

980
00:38:26,513 --> 00:38:28,473
I thought, you know,
it was a waste of time,

981
00:38:28,473 --> 00:38:29,933
but what the hell?

982
00:38:29,933 --> 00:38:31,100
(chuckling)

983
00:38:31,100 --> 00:38:33,394
♪

984
00:38:33,394 --> 00:38:36,231
So I waited there
half my lunch hour.

985
00:38:36,231 --> 00:38:39,108
They didn't come out to see me.

986
00:38:39,108 --> 00:38:42,403
They knew I was there,
but they didn't come out.

987
00:38:42,403 --> 00:38:45,615
So I just threw 'em up
in the air and walked out.

988
00:38:45,615 --> 00:38:49,160
♪

989
00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:50,662
The next thing, they call me.

990
00:38:50,662 --> 00:38:53,957
Said, "You've gotta get up to
Times Building straight away.

991
00:38:53,957 --> 00:38:57,001
Bert Stern, one of the biggest
photographers in the world,

992
00:38:57,001 --> 00:38:58,127
wants to use you."

993
00:38:58,127 --> 00:39:01,214
He had lost the male model
he was working with

994
00:39:01,214 --> 00:39:03,466
'cause the babies
he was working with

995
00:39:03,466 --> 00:39:05,218
were above his head
and he was holding them

996
00:39:05,218 --> 00:39:06,511
and they were all peeing on him,

997
00:39:06,511 --> 00:39:08,721
and after the third one,
he said, "To hell with this,"

998
00:39:08,721 --> 00:39:10,765
and walked out.

999
00:39:10,765 --> 00:39:12,684
Next thing I know,
I've got the job.

1000
00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:15,645
Smile, smile at
this enfant, smile.

1001
00:39:15,645 --> 00:39:17,105
He's a cute little kid, eh?

1002
00:39:17,105 --> 00:39:19,274
You know, I thought, "Well,
it's a job, what the hell?"

1003
00:39:19,274 --> 00:39:21,860
You are doing very well,
George, very well.

1004
00:39:21,860 --> 00:39:26,322
Ooh, um, you're about
to burst, aren't you?

1005
00:39:26,322 --> 00:39:27,657
Oh, yeah.

1006
00:39:27,657 --> 00:39:28,908
Then they peed at me, too.

1007
00:39:28,908 --> 00:39:30,994
I'd just duck it and
dive it, and, you know,

1008
00:39:30,994 --> 00:39:33,788
I didn't get upset, you know,
I was just dodging baby piss.

1009
00:39:33,788 --> 00:39:38,585
Ugh, what have you
been feeding this baby?

1010
00:39:38,585 --> 00:39:39,961
(spitting)

1011
00:39:39,961 --> 00:39:42,255
Well guess what happened,
it came out three months later

1012
00:39:42,255 --> 00:39:43,590
and everybody wants me.

1013
00:39:43,590 --> 00:39:45,425
W-wait, I want
to pause there.

1014
00:39:45,425 --> 00:39:48,928
How much of this story
that you've told me is true?

1015
00:39:48,928 --> 00:39:51,764
-Which one?
-The whole story.

1016
00:39:51,764 --> 00:39:55,101
Hey, how can I remember
it if it wasn't true?

1017
00:39:55,101 --> 00:39:58,730
♪

1018
00:39:58,730 --> 00:40:01,524
♪ There'll be a change
in the weather ♪

1019
00:40:01,524 --> 00:40:03,693
♪ And a change in the sea ♪

1020
00:40:03,693 --> 00:40:08,364
I became one of Europe's top
models, male models, overnight.

1021
00:40:08,364 --> 00:40:10,366
So I'm booked up
seven days a week.

1022
00:40:10,366 --> 00:40:12,201
I had to give up my job.

1023
00:40:12,201 --> 00:40:14,913
Yes, I'll just, uh,

1024
00:40:14,913 --> 00:40:19,042
grab the old...

1025
00:40:19,042 --> 00:40:22,462
putting wedge.

1026
00:40:22,462 --> 00:40:23,504
I'm sophisticated.

1027
00:40:23,504 --> 00:40:25,298
I didn't know anything
about modeling, I just--

1028
00:40:25,298 --> 00:40:26,799
I didn't even know
where the camera was.

1029
00:40:26,799 --> 00:40:29,719
I mean, I don't even know what
the hell I'm advertising here.

1030
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:32,889
The whiskey or the chair?

1031
00:40:32,889 --> 00:40:35,683
And then this job came along
that's called "Big Fry,"

1032
00:40:35,683 --> 00:40:39,729
the biggest commercial project
in London at the time.

1033
00:40:39,729 --> 00:40:41,940
Big Fry comes into
town, boom-boom,

1034
00:40:41,940 --> 00:40:43,650
with a big box of chocolates.

1035
00:40:43,650 --> 00:40:45,234
♪ Big Fry's are comin' by ♪

1036
00:40:45,234 --> 00:40:46,235
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

1037
00:40:46,235 --> 00:40:48,363
♪ Big Fry ♪

1038
00:40:48,363 --> 00:40:49,572
It was fun.

1039
00:40:49,572 --> 00:40:51,741
They hired little
people around me,

1040
00:40:51,741 --> 00:40:53,826
so most people thought
I was seven foot tall

1041
00:40:53,826 --> 00:40:57,080
or eight foot tall, so they
didn't really recognize me.

1042
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:58,915
I mean, I used
to see things like

1043
00:40:58,915 --> 00:41:03,503
"I'd like to meet Big Fry"
written on toilet walls.

1044
00:41:03,503 --> 00:41:05,213
My life was on the up and up.

1045
00:41:05,213 --> 00:41:07,131
I'd just settled
with my girlfriend,

1046
00:41:07,131 --> 00:41:08,800
and we're all happy
and everything.

1047
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,427
Then I was asked to go
on a job down to Spain

1048
00:41:11,427 --> 00:41:13,221
with three beautiful girls.

1049
00:41:13,221 --> 00:41:24,565
♪

1050
00:41:24,565 --> 00:41:26,275
Oh, it's a party!

1051
00:41:26,275 --> 00:41:28,695
♪

1052
00:41:28,695 --> 00:41:30,363
All right!

1053
00:41:30,363 --> 00:41:35,284
♪

1054
00:41:35,284 --> 00:41:37,286
So the first night I'm there,

1055
00:41:37,286 --> 00:41:39,789
there's this girl,
she's from Germany,

1056
00:41:39,789 --> 00:41:41,708
her name was Gundel.

1057
00:41:41,708 --> 00:41:44,669
She was one of
Germany's top models,

1058
00:41:44,669 --> 00:41:47,005
and she was a stunner.

1059
00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:49,298
Is something the matter?

1060
00:41:49,298 --> 00:41:51,968
Uh, no, no, not at all.

1061
00:41:51,968 --> 00:41:55,722
In fact, everything is perfect.

1062
00:41:55,722 --> 00:41:59,392
It is, isn't it?

1063
00:41:59,392 --> 00:42:01,144
I'm thinking, "Oh, God,

1064
00:42:01,144 --> 00:42:02,520
I'm in trouble."

1065
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,272
Eyes up here, George.

1066
00:42:04,272 --> 00:42:05,857
Uh, yeah.

1067
00:42:05,857 --> 00:42:07,650
Please, stay focused.

1068
00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:16,242
♪

1069
00:42:16,242 --> 00:42:19,495
George, could you
pass me a banana?

1070
00:42:19,495 --> 00:42:21,080
♪

1071
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:22,665
Not that one.

1072
00:42:22,665 --> 00:42:24,208
The bigger one.

1073
00:42:24,208 --> 00:42:44,937
♪

1074
00:42:44,937 --> 00:42:46,397
Mmm.

1075
00:42:46,397 --> 00:42:56,866
♪

1076
00:42:56,866 --> 00:43:00,787
We worked together for two
weeks and I behaved myself.

1077
00:43:00,787 --> 00:43:04,082
Then I'm at the airport
to go to London,

1078
00:43:04,082 --> 00:43:06,042
and she came up
to me and she said,

1079
00:43:06,042 --> 00:43:09,087
"I'm going to see
my mother in Minorca.

1080
00:43:09,087 --> 00:43:10,963
Would you like to come?"

1081
00:43:10,963 --> 00:43:12,882
I was shocked, I said,

1082
00:43:12,882 --> 00:43:15,343
"But my bag, my bag's
going to London."

1083
00:43:15,343 --> 00:43:16,385
And she said...

1084
00:43:16,385 --> 00:43:18,513
Oh, too bad.

1085
00:43:18,513 --> 00:43:30,066
♪

1086
00:43:30,066 --> 00:43:32,193
I never saw that bag again.

1087
00:43:32,193 --> 00:43:36,572
♪

1088
00:43:36,572 --> 00:43:38,741
I just called Belinda
and said I'll be--

1089
00:43:38,741 --> 00:43:40,618
I've been extended a week.

1090
00:43:40,618 --> 00:43:43,579
♪

1091
00:43:43,579 --> 00:43:46,165
And she said, "Okay,
I'll see you in a week."

1092
00:43:52,088 --> 00:44:05,643
♪

1093
00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:07,895
And when I got back...

1094
00:44:07,895 --> 00:44:10,773
♪

1095
00:44:10,773 --> 00:44:14,235
...she, uh, she knew that
I'd been with someone else.

1096
00:44:14,235 --> 00:44:24,579
♪

1097
00:44:24,579 --> 00:44:26,122
She was smart.

1098
00:44:26,122 --> 00:44:40,261
♪

1099
00:44:40,261 --> 00:44:43,472
I cried over her before,

1100
00:44:43,472 --> 00:44:45,141
when I couldn't find her.

1101
00:44:45,141 --> 00:44:46,767
Then when I found her

1102
00:44:46,767 --> 00:44:51,022
and just living out
your fantasy with her,

1103
00:44:51,022 --> 00:44:53,691
doing what you thought
you might've done.

1104
00:44:53,691 --> 00:44:56,569
♪

1105
00:44:56,569 --> 00:44:59,697
Then I think the picture
changed in my mind, you know,

1106
00:44:59,697 --> 00:45:01,991
in the subconscious mind.

1107
00:45:01,991 --> 00:45:03,409
(door closing)

1108
00:45:03,409 --> 00:45:04,952
♪

1109
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:09,081
I was being untrue to the girl
I was living with, loving.

1110
00:45:09,081 --> 00:45:10,791
♪

1111
00:45:10,791 --> 00:45:12,543
I was sad.

1112
00:45:12,543 --> 00:45:14,212
♪

1113
00:45:14,212 --> 00:45:17,965
So that was the end of Belinda.

1114
00:45:17,965 --> 00:45:22,470
♪

1115
00:45:25,306 --> 00:45:27,266
(rain pouring)

1116
00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:32,355
So Belinda moved out,

1117
00:45:32,355 --> 00:45:35,524
lived with her father who
was in London at the time.

1118
00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:38,694
And it's a strange thing,

1119
00:45:38,694 --> 00:45:41,864
you'd think that I'd be
broken-hearted for years.

1120
00:45:41,864 --> 00:45:45,743
♪

1121
00:45:45,743 --> 00:45:48,037
But it was a different era.

1122
00:45:48,037 --> 00:45:50,289
It was make love, not war.

1123
00:45:50,289 --> 00:45:53,042
And I was a young, 24-year-old,

1124
00:45:53,042 --> 00:45:54,460
crazy Australian,

1125
00:45:54,460 --> 00:45:59,590
and girls were--not all girls,
but some were attracted to it.

1126
00:45:59,590 --> 00:46:03,552
It was the craziest sexual
time that I'd ever had.

1127
00:46:03,552 --> 00:46:07,515
♪

1128
00:46:07,515 --> 00:46:12,019
The women in the '60s were
just as sexual-orientated

1129
00:46:12,019 --> 00:46:14,897
as the men, and they
were breaking out.

1130
00:46:14,897 --> 00:46:20,152
♪

1131
00:46:20,152 --> 00:46:22,321
G'day, mate, Ken,
male model/actor.

1132
00:46:22,321 --> 00:46:24,657
-Good to meet you.
-I was modeling in Germany

1133
00:46:24,657 --> 00:46:26,742
and I met a guy
called Ken Gaherity,

1134
00:46:26,742 --> 00:46:29,662
who was a fellow
Australian model.

1135
00:46:29,662 --> 00:46:31,747
We got to know each
other fairly well

1136
00:46:31,747 --> 00:46:33,291
through mainly women.

1137
00:46:33,291 --> 00:46:35,459
So, uh, what are you
doing after work?

1138
00:46:35,459 --> 00:46:37,253
-Oh, um...
-Yeah, well, Ken and I

1139
00:46:37,253 --> 00:46:41,048
were just thinking about having
a get-together at our place.

1140
00:46:41,048 --> 00:46:43,009
Yeah, a little Truth or Dare?

1141
00:46:43,009 --> 00:46:45,094
Here's how it works,
we'd truthfully tell you

1142
00:46:45,094 --> 00:46:46,679
that we want to
make love with you,

1143
00:46:46,679 --> 00:46:48,973
and then we dare you to do it.

1144
00:46:48,973 --> 00:46:50,558
I'd pull the women
off the street

1145
00:46:50,558 --> 00:46:52,601
and I'd take 'em into
Ken's place, and...

1146
00:46:52,601 --> 00:46:55,021
♪

1147
00:46:55,021 --> 00:46:57,481
Next thing you know,
we got a threesome going.

1148
00:46:57,481 --> 00:47:01,944
♪

1149
00:47:01,944 --> 00:47:04,405
We did this dozens of times,

1150
00:47:04,405 --> 00:47:06,866
and it was sometimes
two or three times a day.

1151
00:47:06,866 --> 00:47:08,826
No, you're not quite
getting it, say it with me.

1152
00:47:08,826 --> 00:47:09,994
"G'day."

1153
00:47:09,994 --> 00:47:11,162
G'day.

1154
00:47:11,162 --> 00:47:13,956
Yeah, you know, you've got
a very... talented tongue,

1155
00:47:13,956 --> 00:47:15,624
I can tell.

1156
00:47:15,624 --> 00:47:17,626
There was this one day
I picked up a girl

1157
00:47:17,626 --> 00:47:18,794
at King's Road.

1158
00:47:18,794 --> 00:47:20,046
I said to her, "Come up,

1159
00:47:20,046 --> 00:47:23,007
we gotta meet a friend of
mine, have a cup of tea."

1160
00:47:23,007 --> 00:47:25,718
-Sure.
-All right.

1161
00:47:25,718 --> 00:47:28,471
And we're sitting up there
having a cup of tea,

1162
00:47:28,471 --> 00:47:31,891
and then she said,
"Well, I've gotta go now."

1163
00:47:31,891 --> 00:47:35,394
No, no, you shouldn't
go anywhere.

1164
00:47:35,394 --> 00:47:37,980
-Why?
-And Ken said,

1165
00:47:37,980 --> 00:47:39,982
"I put acid in your tea.

1166
00:47:39,982 --> 00:47:42,068
And I put it in
yours, too, George."

1167
00:47:42,068 --> 00:47:43,319
(laughing)

1168
00:47:43,319 --> 00:47:44,320
What's that?

1169
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:46,280
And I didn't know what acid was.

1170
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:48,282
He goes, "LSD.

1171
00:47:48,282 --> 00:47:50,326
Haven't you ever heard of it?"

1172
00:47:50,326 --> 00:47:53,162
He's not the sort of
guy you could trust.

1173
00:47:53,162 --> 00:47:54,663
It makes walls melt,

1174
00:47:54,663 --> 00:47:56,707
your brain feel
like it's on fire.

1175
00:47:56,707 --> 00:47:58,834
♪

1176
00:47:58,834 --> 00:48:00,961
What are you three
talking about?

1177
00:48:00,961 --> 00:48:02,671
♪

1178
00:48:02,671 --> 00:48:05,299
-I weigh a thousand pounds.
-(laughter)

1179
00:48:05,299 --> 00:48:07,009
♪

1180
00:48:07,009 --> 00:48:10,179
I weigh a thousand pounds
and my legs are bicycles.

1181
00:48:10,179 --> 00:48:12,890
Next thing, I saw my breath
going across the room

1182
00:48:12,890 --> 00:48:13,849
and the curtains moving.

1183
00:48:13,849 --> 00:48:15,559
My arms are also bicycles.

1184
00:48:15,559 --> 00:48:19,271
And I'm thinking, my god,
Ken, what have you done?

1185
00:48:19,271 --> 00:48:22,024
It's weird, I can taste colors.

1186
00:48:22,024 --> 00:48:24,693
(chuckles)

1187
00:48:24,693 --> 00:48:26,362
(exhaling)

1188
00:48:26,362 --> 00:48:28,030
Well, I might hit the hay.

1189
00:48:28,030 --> 00:48:30,282
What do you say,
you going to come?

1190
00:48:30,282 --> 00:48:31,784
(laughs)

1191
00:48:31,784 --> 00:48:33,369
And I'm laying in bed
and all of a sudden,

1192
00:48:33,369 --> 00:48:35,871
I'm looking in this guy's ear.

1193
00:48:35,871 --> 00:48:37,706
And I say, "Whose ear is that?"

1194
00:48:37,706 --> 00:48:39,250
Whose ear is that?

1195
00:48:39,250 --> 00:48:40,251
Then I went back a little bit

1196
00:48:40,251 --> 00:48:42,169
and still couldn't
figure it out.

1197
00:48:42,169 --> 00:48:43,879
Went right up to the ceiling.

1198
00:48:43,879 --> 00:48:45,423
Whose ear is that?

1199
00:48:45,423 --> 00:48:47,633
And I looked over, I saw her.

1200
00:48:47,633 --> 00:48:49,718
Said, "That's
the girl I'm with!

1201
00:48:49,718 --> 00:48:51,011
Shit, that's me!"

1202
00:48:51,011 --> 00:48:53,806
I was looking in my own ear,
I didn't even know!

1203
00:48:53,806 --> 00:48:55,975
Zoom, back in the body.

1204
00:48:59,603 --> 00:49:02,731
Now it's daylight
the next morning,

1205
00:49:02,731 --> 00:49:05,234
and she said, "Can you
get me out of here?"

1206
00:49:05,234 --> 00:49:08,612
I thought I'd only
been there an hour.

1207
00:49:08,612 --> 00:49:10,531
Yeah.

1208
00:49:10,531 --> 00:49:12,408
Mm.

1209
00:49:12,408 --> 00:49:14,618
(chuckling)

1210
00:49:14,618 --> 00:49:16,120
So I take her downstairs

1211
00:49:16,120 --> 00:49:18,456
and there's a line of
people on the bus stop

1212
00:49:18,456 --> 00:49:21,542
going to work
on the King's Road.

1213
00:49:21,542 --> 00:49:25,045
And they're all staring at us.

1214
00:49:25,045 --> 00:49:27,923
And I'm going, "What
are you staring at?"

1215
00:49:27,923 --> 00:49:29,592
I look down,
I had no clothes on.

1216
00:49:29,592 --> 00:49:31,385
I had my clothes
underneath my arm

1217
00:49:31,385 --> 00:49:32,845
and so did she.

1218
00:49:32,845 --> 00:49:36,015
♪

1219
00:49:36,015 --> 00:49:37,641
We thought we'd put them on.

1220
00:49:37,641 --> 00:49:41,395
That's how out of it we were.

1221
00:49:41,395 --> 00:49:43,731
Whoops.

1222
00:49:43,731 --> 00:49:45,941
It was a crazy time in my life,

1223
00:49:45,941 --> 00:49:48,777
but it was about
to get even crazier.

1224
00:49:48,777 --> 00:49:53,866
♪

1225
00:49:53,866 --> 00:49:56,327
So I was hanging out with Ken,

1226
00:49:56,327 --> 00:49:57,369
and he said to me,

1227
00:49:57,369 --> 00:50:00,456
"Hey, mate, got to
help me out tomorrow."

1228
00:50:00,456 --> 00:50:01,624
I said, "What?"

1229
00:50:01,624 --> 00:50:03,542
He said, "My girlfriend's
coming back into town,"

1230
00:50:03,542 --> 00:50:05,419
and he had
double-booked himself.

1231
00:50:05,419 --> 00:50:07,129
Got a meeting with an agent
that I've been wanting to meet

1232
00:50:07,129 --> 00:50:08,797
for so long.

1233
00:50:08,797 --> 00:50:11,091
Well, yeah, but
it was an agent.

1234
00:50:11,091 --> 00:50:12,134
Film agent.

1235
00:50:12,134 --> 00:50:13,344
Ken was just doing modeling

1236
00:50:13,344 --> 00:50:14,970
to get some money.

1237
00:50:14,970 --> 00:50:16,305
He really wanted to be an actor.

1238
00:50:16,305 --> 00:50:17,765
You've gotta help me out.

1239
00:50:17,765 --> 00:50:19,475
Can't stand her up.

1240
00:50:19,475 --> 00:50:20,976
She's going to take
you to a screening.

1241
00:50:20,976 --> 00:50:23,103
-What's that?
-I had no idea.

1242
00:50:23,103 --> 00:50:24,897
Well, they show movies
that haven't come out yet.

1243
00:50:24,897 --> 00:50:28,150
Can you do it for me?

1244
00:50:28,150 --> 00:50:29,693
Okay, I'll do it.

1245
00:50:29,693 --> 00:50:31,487
That's great!

1246
00:50:31,487 --> 00:50:32,988
-That's great.
-No worries.

1247
00:50:32,988 --> 00:50:35,616
-Great, great.
-Yeah, it's fine.

1248
00:50:35,616 --> 00:50:36,909
Thanks, man.

1249
00:50:36,909 --> 00:50:38,410
No worries.

1250
00:50:38,410 --> 00:50:41,539
-You all right, love?
-Mm-hm.

1251
00:50:41,539 --> 00:50:43,666
That's how casual it was.

1252
00:50:43,666 --> 00:50:46,460
I went the next day and
there was Maggie Abbott.

1253
00:50:46,460 --> 00:50:49,255
Wackadoo, hey?

1254
00:50:49,255 --> 00:50:51,257
So you're a friend of Ken's.

1255
00:50:51,257 --> 00:50:56,303
Yeah, yeah, we've
mucked about a bit.

1256
00:50:56,303 --> 00:50:59,598
Are you close with Ken?

1257
00:50:59,598 --> 00:51:01,892
Oh, we see each other
once in a while.

1258
00:51:01,892 --> 00:51:05,938
Mm, yeah, same,
we have mutual friends.

1259
00:51:05,938 --> 00:51:07,314
Friends who connect us.

1260
00:51:07,314 --> 00:51:09,483
Sort of--yeah.

1261
00:51:09,483 --> 00:51:10,818
Can't remember the movie we saw,

1262
00:51:10,818 --> 00:51:13,571
but I saw the Rolling Stones.

1263
00:51:13,571 --> 00:51:15,114
Know the Rolling Stones?

1264
00:51:15,114 --> 00:51:17,741
Do I know the Rolling Stones?

1265
00:51:17,741 --> 00:51:20,703
And I saw the Beatles there.

1266
00:51:20,703 --> 00:51:22,496
Paul!

1267
00:51:22,496 --> 00:51:23,914
You know Paul McCartney?

1268
00:51:23,914 --> 00:51:26,166
Of course, of course.

1269
00:51:26,166 --> 00:51:29,211
They all show up
at these screenings

1270
00:51:29,211 --> 00:51:31,046
and I was very impressed.

1271
00:51:31,046 --> 00:51:33,591
I'm very impressed.

1272
00:51:33,591 --> 00:51:38,721
I was now sitting in the middle
of all these important people.

1273
00:51:38,721 --> 00:51:40,973
And agents and people,
I was told later,

1274
00:51:40,973 --> 00:51:42,933
were asking who I was.

1275
00:51:42,933 --> 00:51:45,477
♪

1276
00:51:45,477 --> 00:51:47,730
I went back to Paris,
I was living in Paris,

1277
00:51:47,730 --> 00:51:50,733
and I was in a girl's
house who I just met.

1278
00:51:50,733 --> 00:51:53,902
-(sighs)
-Bonjour?

1279
00:51:53,902 --> 00:51:56,739
And she says, "Pour tu."

1280
00:51:56,739 --> 00:51:58,407
She passes me the phone--for me.

1281
00:51:58,407 --> 00:52:01,243
I said, "It can't be,
nobody knows I'm with you."

1282
00:52:01,243 --> 00:52:02,536
And it's Maggie Abbott.

1283
00:52:02,536 --> 00:52:04,204
George, it's Maggie Abbott.

1284
00:52:04,204 --> 00:52:05,748
Maggie had rung my house.

1285
00:52:05,748 --> 00:52:08,584
My roommate had sent I went
to La Coupole restaurant.

1286
00:52:08,584 --> 00:52:10,336
Rang the maître d'
and the maître d' says

1287
00:52:10,336 --> 00:52:13,339
I left with this girl,
and she called me.

1288
00:52:13,339 --> 00:52:15,466
Wouldn't you think I would
think that's important?

1289
00:52:15,466 --> 00:52:16,550
What do you want me for?

1290
00:52:16,550 --> 00:52:18,636
There's a film I think
that you're right for.

1291
00:52:18,636 --> 00:52:19,887
What's the name of it?

1292
00:52:19,887 --> 00:52:23,974
Well, I'm not going
to tell you on the phone.

1293
00:52:23,974 --> 00:52:26,602
Get straight back
to London, George.

1294
00:52:26,602 --> 00:52:31,357
And I hung up and I went off
making love with this girl

1295
00:52:31,357 --> 00:52:32,900
and forgot about it.

1296
00:52:32,900 --> 00:52:34,068
About three or four weeks later,

1297
00:52:34,068 --> 00:52:35,486
I was back in London with Ken,

1298
00:52:35,486 --> 00:52:38,030
and he asked me, "What
did Maggie want you for?"

1299
00:52:38,030 --> 00:52:39,782
I don't know, she
wouldn't tell me.

1300
00:52:39,782 --> 00:52:42,826
God, she was just calling
everywhere looking for you.

1301
00:52:42,826 --> 00:52:44,745
Why didn't you call her?

1302
00:52:44,745 --> 00:52:46,246
I don't know.

1303
00:52:46,246 --> 00:52:47,706
Mate, I'm not an actor.

1304
00:52:47,706 --> 00:52:51,293
She wanted me to act
in a movie or something.

1305
00:52:51,293 --> 00:52:52,586
Come on.

1306
00:52:52,586 --> 00:52:54,838
Let's go find her.

1307
00:52:54,838 --> 00:52:57,091
Ken, we're right
in the middle of a--

1308
00:52:57,091 --> 00:53:00,010
So we went up to her office
and she told Ken to wait outside

1309
00:53:00,010 --> 00:53:01,303
while she talks to me.

1310
00:53:01,303 --> 00:53:03,847
All right, you got me here.

1311
00:53:03,847 --> 00:53:05,891
Now what do you want with me?

1312
00:53:07,726 --> 00:53:10,521
And she said, "I think
you're right for James Bond."

1313
00:53:10,521 --> 00:53:12,773
-I said, "What?"
-What?

1314
00:53:12,773 --> 00:53:14,483
"What makes you say that?"

1315
00:53:14,483 --> 00:53:16,735
She said, "You're just
very sure of yourself."

1316
00:53:16,735 --> 00:53:17,903
Very arrogant.

1317
00:53:17,903 --> 00:53:19,196
They're looking for this.

1318
00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:20,614
Arrogant?

1319
00:53:20,614 --> 00:53:21,699
(scoffs)

1320
00:53:21,699 --> 00:53:23,200
And I didn't know that
arrogance was a bad word,

1321
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:24,326
so I said, "Thank you."

1322
00:53:24,326 --> 00:53:26,495
You've gotta get in
to see Dyson Lovell,

1323
00:53:26,495 --> 00:53:28,997
the casting director.

1324
00:53:28,997 --> 00:53:31,166
Go down there.

1325
00:53:31,166 --> 00:53:32,751
Let him see you.

1326
00:53:32,751 --> 00:53:34,753
♪

1327
00:53:34,753 --> 00:53:37,172
James Bond, eh...Bond.

1328
00:53:37,172 --> 00:53:39,967
And she said, "Go down
there and let him see you."

1329
00:53:39,967 --> 00:53:40,926
Yeah, all right.

1330
00:53:40,926 --> 00:53:43,762
But she didn't tell me
I had to sneak in.

1331
00:53:43,762 --> 00:53:45,347
♪

1332
00:53:45,347 --> 00:53:47,182
I went down, just walked in.

1333
00:53:47,182 --> 00:53:48,642
Get in, walk in.

1334
00:53:48,642 --> 00:53:49,643
G'day, love.

1335
00:53:49,643 --> 00:53:51,061
I'm here to see a Dyson Lovell.

1336
00:53:51,061 --> 00:53:53,021
-Name?
-Lazenby.

1337
00:53:53,021 --> 00:53:54,690
George Lazenby.

1338
00:53:54,690 --> 00:53:57,484
I'm sorry, no,
you're not on the list.

1339
00:53:57,484 --> 00:53:59,695
Um, you sure--you want
to double-check?

1340
00:53:59,695 --> 00:54:01,196
Maggie Abbott
told me to come by.

1341
00:54:01,196 --> 00:54:03,490
This job is for
union actors only.

1342
00:54:03,490 --> 00:54:05,159
Are you in the union?

1343
00:54:05,159 --> 00:54:06,577
Yeah--oh no, of course.

1344
00:54:06,577 --> 00:54:09,246
Yeah, absolutely,
lifelong member.

1345
00:54:09,246 --> 00:54:10,330
Call them if you want, ask them.

1346
00:54:10,330 --> 00:54:12,207
-All right.
-Well, don't call them now.

1347
00:54:12,207 --> 00:54:13,375
I mean, it's
probably a bit early.

1348
00:54:13,375 --> 00:54:14,418
Don't want to wake them up.

1349
00:54:14,418 --> 00:54:16,670
Which union are you in?

1350
00:54:16,670 --> 00:54:17,838
The main one, the big one.

1351
00:54:17,838 --> 00:54:19,548
-DAFDA.
-Yep, that's the one.

1352
00:54:19,548 --> 00:54:20,549
-Wrong.
-Shit!

1353
00:54:20,549 --> 00:54:22,384
I'm sorry, you're
going to have to leave.

1354
00:54:22,384 --> 00:54:23,886
Daniel?

1355
00:54:23,886 --> 00:54:26,054
You're up, love.

1356
00:54:26,054 --> 00:54:28,098
Daniel, lovely to see you.

1357
00:54:28,098 --> 00:54:30,893
And the woman kicks me out,
says no, you're not on the list.

1358
00:54:30,893 --> 00:54:32,060
So I called up Maggie.

1359
00:54:32,060 --> 00:54:33,645
-Maggie Abbott.
-Maggie!

1360
00:54:33,645 --> 00:54:34,938
Said they wouldn't let me in.

1361
00:54:34,938 --> 00:54:36,190
-They wouldn't even see me.
-(Maggie sighs)

1362
00:54:36,190 --> 00:54:37,900
And she said, "You've
got to get in there!"

1363
00:54:37,900 --> 00:54:39,610
Just--just get past that girl.

1364
00:54:39,610 --> 00:54:40,903
Channel your inner James Bond.

1365
00:54:40,903 --> 00:54:43,405
Do whatever it takes
to get in that room.

1366
00:54:43,405 --> 00:54:46,408
Fortunately, I saw all
these guys there waiting

1367
00:54:46,408 --> 00:54:48,744
who were looking
like Sean Connery,

1368
00:54:48,744 --> 00:54:50,412
and I wasn't.

1369
00:54:50,412 --> 00:54:51,622
So I went out and I knew,

1370
00:54:51,622 --> 00:54:52,873
when I was a car salesman,

1371
00:54:52,873 --> 00:54:55,751
that Sean Connery got his
hair cut down the road.

1372
00:54:55,751 --> 00:54:58,462
After that, I went
to his tailor.

1373
00:54:58,462 --> 00:55:00,297
♪

1374
00:55:00,297 --> 00:55:01,590
Went in there, I said,

1375
00:55:01,590 --> 00:55:03,258
I want a suit
like Sean Connery.

1376
00:55:03,258 --> 00:55:04,760
Can you do it for me today?

1377
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:06,261
They went, "Huh!"

1378
00:55:06,261 --> 00:55:08,138
Six months, my friend.

1379
00:55:08,138 --> 00:55:09,806
Well, jeez.

1380
00:55:09,806 --> 00:55:12,184
♪

1381
00:55:12,184 --> 00:55:13,310
What about that one?

1382
00:55:13,310 --> 00:55:14,937
That's Connery's.

1383
00:55:14,937 --> 00:55:16,313
A suit he didn't pick up.

1384
00:55:16,313 --> 00:55:17,648
Hasn't picked it up in months.

1385
00:55:17,648 --> 00:55:20,609
Off about the world doing
some photo shoot or something.

1386
00:55:20,609 --> 00:55:21,860
Is that right?

1387
00:55:21,860 --> 00:55:23,278
I thought, Jesus, if they're
looking for James Bond,

1388
00:55:23,278 --> 00:55:25,489
they want me to look like that.

1389
00:55:25,489 --> 00:55:29,159
You know, on second thought,
I'll just get that hat.

1390
00:55:29,159 --> 00:55:30,452
That one?

1391
00:55:30,452 --> 00:55:32,037
Mm-hm, that's the one.

1392
00:55:32,037 --> 00:55:33,622
Very well, sir.

1393
00:55:33,622 --> 00:55:39,461
♪

1394
00:55:39,461 --> 00:55:40,963
(chuckles)

1395
00:55:40,963 --> 00:55:43,298
So here I've got Connery's suit.

1396
00:55:43,298 --> 00:55:45,092
I already had a Rolex.

1397
00:55:45,092 --> 00:55:47,302
I got my hair cut where
he got his hair cut.

1398
00:55:47,302 --> 00:55:50,264
I go back, I wait
outside the door,

1399
00:55:50,264 --> 00:55:53,559
and the girl at the desk
who wouldn't let me in,

1400
00:55:53,559 --> 00:55:56,436
she bends down
to get something

1401
00:55:56,436 --> 00:55:58,397
and I just run right
past her up the stairs,

1402
00:55:58,397 --> 00:56:02,150
and she's going,
"Hey, you, stop!"

1403
00:56:02,150 --> 00:56:04,695
No, Harry, look, we're talking
about replacing Sean Connery,

1404
00:56:04,695 --> 00:56:06,029
it's not an easy thing to do.

1405
00:56:06,029 --> 00:56:08,323
Dyson Lovell,
the casting director,

1406
00:56:08,323 --> 00:56:10,826
was on the phone
talking to Harry Saltzman.

1407
00:56:10,826 --> 00:56:12,327
Listen, we are going
to find this guy.

1408
00:56:12,327 --> 00:56:15,247
No, Roger Moore is
totally wrong for it.

1409
00:56:15,247 --> 00:56:16,665
Hold on... who are you?

1410
00:56:16,665 --> 00:56:18,625
And I was standing there
with my hand like this,

1411
00:56:18,625 --> 00:56:19,710
with the Rolex.

1412
00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:23,046
I said, "I heard you're
looking for James Bond."

1413
00:56:23,046 --> 00:56:25,841
I didn't have any
acting experience.

1414
00:56:25,841 --> 00:56:28,927
But to me, you know,
as a car salesman,

1415
00:56:28,927 --> 00:56:30,304
you don't know what
this car's about,

1416
00:56:30,304 --> 00:56:31,555
but you'll tell
everybody it's good

1417
00:56:31,555 --> 00:56:34,016
so you can sell
the bloody thing.

1418
00:56:34,016 --> 00:56:35,559
He said, "Harry,
there's a guy out here

1419
00:56:35,559 --> 00:56:36,727
I think you should see."

1420
00:56:36,727 --> 00:56:38,353
And Harry said,
"Bring him over."

1421
00:56:38,353 --> 00:56:40,230
Right.

1422
00:56:40,230 --> 00:56:41,356
Let's go.

1423
00:56:41,356 --> 00:56:42,733
And as we were
walking across the road,

1424
00:56:42,733 --> 00:56:44,610
he was saying, "Tell me
your life story."

1425
00:56:44,610 --> 00:56:45,694
I said, "What"?

1426
00:56:45,694 --> 00:56:46,862
Tell me what you've done.

1427
00:56:46,862 --> 00:56:47,946
How many movies have you done,

1428
00:56:47,946 --> 00:56:49,489
what have you--
where have you worked?

1429
00:56:49,489 --> 00:56:54,620
Oh, jeez--China, Hungary.

1430
00:56:54,620 --> 00:56:56,455
Russia, Ukraine.

1431
00:56:56,455 --> 00:56:58,248
All the countries
I could think of

1432
00:56:58,248 --> 00:57:00,876
that they wouldn't
be able to check on.

1433
00:57:00,876 --> 00:57:02,544
♪

1434
00:57:02,544 --> 00:57:04,129
Well, I think
it's pretty simple.

1435
00:57:04,129 --> 00:57:05,464
He's a distributor!

1436
00:57:05,464 --> 00:57:08,383
He's supposed
to distribute movies!

1437
00:57:08,383 --> 00:57:11,803
We get up there and Harry
has got an intimidating office.

1438
00:57:11,803 --> 00:57:13,096
It's simple.

1439
00:57:13,096 --> 00:57:14,890
And Harry was sitting there
with his feet up on the desk,

1440
00:57:14,890 --> 00:57:18,393
and he points for me to sit
right at the bottom of his feet.

1441
00:57:18,393 --> 00:57:20,520
I don't like sitting
in front of people's feet.

1442
00:57:20,520 --> 00:57:22,189
-That's his job!
-Sit.

1443
00:57:22,189 --> 00:57:24,107
So I went over and
looked out the window.

1444
00:57:24,107 --> 00:57:28,445
You're an idiot,
you're an idiot!

1445
00:57:28,445 --> 00:57:31,323
You know what,
I gotta go, I gotta go.

1446
00:57:31,323 --> 00:57:35,494
♪

1447
00:57:35,494 --> 00:57:36,578
Who are you?

1448
00:57:36,578 --> 00:57:37,788
I said, "George Lazenby."

1449
00:57:37,788 --> 00:57:40,082
He said, "Tell me
your life story."

1450
00:57:40,082 --> 00:57:42,042
I thought, "Oh my god,
I've just told him

1451
00:57:42,042 --> 00:57:43,960
a bunch of lies;
if I screw up--"

1452
00:57:43,960 --> 00:57:45,879
I was shitting myself
underneath all this.

1453
00:57:45,879 --> 00:57:47,631
I said, "I'm getting
in over my head."

1454
00:57:47,631 --> 00:57:51,134
I said, "I just told him,
let him tell you."

1455
00:57:51,134 --> 00:57:53,720
Oh! Um... he's been working--

1456
00:57:53,720 --> 00:57:55,013
My attitude got to him.

1457
00:57:55,013 --> 00:57:56,306
Every other actor
he'd had in there

1458
00:57:56,306 --> 00:57:58,308
did exactly what he asks.

1459
00:57:58,308 --> 00:58:03,271
And Hungary... um, yes.

1460
00:58:03,271 --> 00:58:06,024
He said to Dyson Lovell,
he said, "Where's the director?

1461
00:58:06,024 --> 00:58:07,401
Where's Peter Hunt?"

1462
00:58:07,401 --> 00:58:09,778
Uh, he's in Switzerland
doing location hunting.

1463
00:58:09,778 --> 00:58:11,029
When will he be back?

1464
00:58:11,029 --> 00:58:12,114
Four o'clock on Friday, sir.

1465
00:58:12,114 --> 00:58:15,826
Harry said, "Be here
four o'clock on Friday."

1466
00:58:15,826 --> 00:58:17,452
I said, "I can't be
here at four o'clock."

1467
00:58:17,452 --> 00:58:18,745
Why can't you be here?

1468
00:58:18,745 --> 00:58:19,830
I said, "I gotta
get out of here,

1469
00:58:19,830 --> 00:58:22,124
these guys are gonna
find out I'm a phony."

1470
00:58:22,124 --> 00:58:23,959
I said, "I'm doing
a film in Paris,"

1471
00:58:23,959 --> 00:58:25,293
which is bullshit.

1472
00:58:25,293 --> 00:58:26,628
How much are they paying you?

1473
00:58:26,628 --> 00:58:28,213
I said, "500 pound a day,"

1474
00:58:28,213 --> 00:58:30,632
which was about
50 weeks' wages.

1475
00:58:30,632 --> 00:58:31,591
Yep.

1476
00:58:31,591 --> 00:58:33,969
All right, go down
and see Stanley Sopel

1477
00:58:33,969 --> 00:58:35,554
and he'll give you 500 pounds.

1478
00:58:35,554 --> 00:58:38,390
Be here four o'clock on Friday.

1479
00:58:38,390 --> 00:58:40,726
Stanley Sopel, okay.

1480
00:58:40,726 --> 00:58:42,018
What are you so confused about?

1481
00:58:42,018 --> 00:58:45,105
Get the fuck out of here.

1482
00:58:45,105 --> 00:58:46,732
I couldn't say anything to that.

1483
00:58:46,732 --> 00:58:48,442
So then I go out
and I ring Maggie.

1484
00:58:48,442 --> 00:58:49,985
So, how did you do?

1485
00:58:49,985 --> 00:58:52,195
Well, they gave me 500 pounds
to come back tomorrow.

1486
00:58:52,195 --> 00:58:53,530
Oh, George, be serious.

1487
00:58:53,530 --> 00:58:55,198
-How did you do?
-Maggie, I got the check

1488
00:58:55,198 --> 00:58:57,075
in my hand, 500 pounds.

1489
00:58:57,075 --> 00:58:58,160
She said, "What did you do?"

1490
00:58:58,160 --> 00:58:59,411
What did you do?

1491
00:58:59,411 --> 00:59:01,830
Nobody gives anybody 500 pounds
to come back for a callback.

1492
00:59:01,830 --> 00:59:03,790
Well, I can show you,
if you'd like.

1493
00:59:03,790 --> 00:59:06,501
-What are you doing tonight?
-Bye, George.

1494
00:59:06,501 --> 00:59:12,007
♪

1495
00:59:12,007 --> 00:59:13,675
(sighs with satisfaction)

1496
00:59:13,675 --> 00:59:15,594
I get to see
Peter Hunt on Friday.

1497
00:59:15,594 --> 00:59:16,803
I go into the office.

1498
00:59:16,803 --> 00:59:19,306
So, they flew me
all the way back

1499
00:59:19,306 --> 00:59:22,392
from my location
scouts in Switzerland

1500
00:59:22,392 --> 00:59:24,186
just to meet you.

1501
00:59:24,186 --> 00:59:26,062
And he is fuming.

1502
00:59:26,062 --> 00:59:28,523
He was pissed off
when I walked in.

1503
00:59:28,523 --> 00:59:30,859
Because of me,
he had to come back.

1504
00:59:30,859 --> 00:59:33,278
Looking at me like,
"So tell me.

1505
00:59:33,278 --> 00:59:35,697
What have you done?"

1506
00:59:35,697 --> 00:59:37,115
(clears throat)

1507
00:59:37,115 --> 00:59:39,201
♪

1508
00:59:39,201 --> 00:59:41,119
I don't know what
made me do this,

1509
00:59:41,119 --> 00:59:42,704
but I just came out
with it, I said...

1510
00:59:42,704 --> 00:59:43,955
"Peter...

1511
00:59:43,955 --> 00:59:49,044
♪

1512
00:59:49,044 --> 00:59:52,964
I've never acted in front
of a camera in my life."

1513
00:59:55,509 --> 00:59:57,177
Do you mean to tell me

1514
00:59:57,177 --> 01:00:01,306
you've never acted
a day in your life?

1515
01:00:01,306 --> 01:00:04,935
And he looked at me
for a few seconds.

1516
01:00:04,935 --> 01:00:08,396
(maniacal laughter)

1517
01:00:08,396 --> 01:00:09,606
And he was holding his stomach,

1518
01:00:09,606 --> 01:00:12,317
looking around the room
belly-laughing.

1519
01:00:12,317 --> 01:00:14,778
(snickers)

1520
01:00:16,404 --> 01:00:17,405
(clears throat)

1521
01:00:17,405 --> 01:00:19,241
Do you realize

1522
01:00:19,241 --> 01:00:21,743
you've fooled two of
the most ruthless men

1523
01:00:21,743 --> 01:00:24,037
that I know?

1524
01:00:24,037 --> 01:00:25,580
Stick to your story
and I'll make you

1525
01:00:25,580 --> 01:00:27,624
the next James Bond.

1526
01:00:27,624 --> 01:00:31,461
♪

1527
01:00:31,461 --> 01:00:36,007
"On Her Majesty's
Secret Service."

1528
01:00:36,007 --> 01:00:38,009
That's kind of a long title.

1529
01:00:38,009 --> 01:00:42,097
♪

1530
01:00:42,097 --> 01:00:43,473
Peter was on my side.

1531
01:00:43,473 --> 01:00:45,600
He wanted me to be
the next James Bond,

1532
01:00:45,600 --> 01:00:48,395
but he took me over to meet
Broccoli and Saltzman.

1533
01:00:48,395 --> 01:00:53,859
And they'd already
investigated my background.

1534
01:00:53,859 --> 01:00:55,652
♪ Big fries are comin' by ♪

1535
01:00:55,652 --> 01:00:57,320
-Yeah, yeah!
-♪ Big Fry ♪

1536
01:00:57,320 --> 01:00:58,321
Here comes Big Fry.

1537
01:00:58,321 --> 01:01:01,783
We go into the office,
and Harry said,

1538
01:01:01,783 --> 01:01:03,618
"Get him out of here,
he's a clothes peg.

1539
01:01:03,618 --> 01:01:05,829
We'll be the laughingstock
of the industry."

1540
01:01:05,829 --> 01:01:06,788
Because in those days,

1541
01:01:06,788 --> 01:01:08,456
no one used a male
model as an actor.

1542
01:01:08,456 --> 01:01:11,167
Peter said, "I want to test him
whether you like it or not."

1543
01:01:11,167 --> 01:01:12,878
You're wrong here.

1544
01:01:12,878 --> 01:01:14,045
You're acting like
a buffoon, stop it.

1545
01:01:14,045 --> 01:01:15,422
It's my money!

1546
01:01:15,422 --> 01:01:16,798
Listen, he's gonna be Bond
whether he likes it,

1547
01:01:16,798 --> 01:01:17,883
-whether you like it...
-Peter says,

1548
01:01:17,883 --> 01:01:19,134
"I'll test him at
your place, Harry.

1549
01:01:19,134 --> 01:01:20,135
No one will know."

1550
01:01:20,135 --> 01:01:21,303
I don't want to have
this discussion again.

1551
01:01:21,303 --> 01:01:23,680
We're testing him,
done, goodbye, goodbye.

1552
01:01:25,098 --> 01:01:27,309
Screen test, Lazenby, take one.

1553
01:01:27,309 --> 01:01:29,227
(slate snaps)

1554
01:01:29,227 --> 01:01:31,855
The screen test is where
they put you on camera

1555
01:01:31,855 --> 01:01:33,189
to see what you look like.

1556
01:01:33,189 --> 01:01:35,317
They want to see
how you move,

1557
01:01:35,317 --> 01:01:36,192
how you talk.

1558
01:01:36,192 --> 01:01:39,362
And there were
300 tested on film.

1559
01:01:39,362 --> 01:01:42,699
And I was doing one for stunts.

1560
01:01:42,699 --> 01:01:43,742
They said, "Do you ride horses?"

1561
01:01:43,742 --> 01:01:45,702
I said, "Yes, since
I was this high."

1562
01:01:45,702 --> 01:01:47,495
So they brought one over
and it's got no saddle on it.

1563
01:01:47,495 --> 01:01:50,498
I just grabbed it by the mane
and jumped on it, took off.

1564
01:01:50,498 --> 01:01:53,460
And I rode it until
it ran out of steam.

1565
01:01:53,460 --> 01:01:55,503
They said, "You can ride
a horse, that's for sure."

1566
01:01:55,503 --> 01:01:58,673
Then they took me
to the swimming pool.

1567
01:01:58,673 --> 01:01:59,841
I thought I impressed them

1568
01:01:59,841 --> 01:02:00,967
by swimming
underneath the water.

1569
01:02:00,967 --> 01:02:03,345
So I dived in and
came up the other end.

1570
01:02:03,345 --> 01:02:04,846
"No, on top of the water!

1571
01:02:04,846 --> 01:02:07,641
Want to see you swim!"

1572
01:02:07,641 --> 01:02:10,393
I had to first of all
get past Harry and Cubby,

1573
01:02:10,393 --> 01:02:11,686
because when I was a male model,

1574
01:02:11,686 --> 01:02:13,647
they wanted to chop me out.

1575
01:02:13,647 --> 01:02:16,316
I was inside, not showing it,

1576
01:02:16,316 --> 01:02:18,652
that I'm way over my head here.

1577
01:02:18,652 --> 01:02:21,905
I'm just going
to make a fool of myself.

1578
01:02:21,905 --> 01:02:23,031
(knocking at door)

1579
01:02:23,031 --> 01:02:25,659
And one night,
this guy came to my door.

1580
01:02:25,659 --> 01:02:26,701
Can I help you?

1581
01:02:26,701 --> 01:02:28,036
He had this
beautiful girl with him.

1582
01:02:28,036 --> 01:02:30,205
Said, "She wants
to make love with you."

1583
01:02:30,205 --> 01:02:32,540
I said, "What?"

1584
01:02:32,540 --> 01:02:34,417
She stripped her gear off.

1585
01:02:34,417 --> 01:02:35,877
Please come in.

1586
01:02:35,877 --> 01:02:42,217
♪

1587
01:02:42,217 --> 01:02:44,886
Interesting design in here.

1588
01:02:44,886 --> 01:02:47,555
(panting, moaning)

1589
01:02:47,555 --> 01:02:49,724
I got on her and

1590
01:02:49,724 --> 01:02:51,434
he was sitting in
a chair right next to me.

1591
01:02:51,434 --> 01:02:53,228
I'm saying, "Aren't
you going to join in?"

1592
01:02:53,228 --> 01:02:58,274
I thought he'd be
going second or something.

1593
01:02:58,274 --> 01:03:00,568
He said, "No, no, no,
that's all right."

1594
01:03:00,568 --> 01:03:03,989
And I thought,
"He's a bloody pervert."

1595
01:03:03,989 --> 01:03:06,241
(crunching into apple)

1596
01:03:06,241 --> 01:03:08,410
It's just hard to concentrate.

1597
01:03:08,410 --> 01:03:10,578
♪

1598
01:03:10,578 --> 01:03:13,039
The next thing I know,
she gets dressed and leaves.

1599
01:03:13,039 --> 01:03:15,917
Uh...thank you?

1600
01:03:15,917 --> 01:03:17,210
They said you were a male model,

1601
01:03:17,210 --> 01:03:20,088
and the studio, they were
afraid you were gay.

1602
01:03:20,088 --> 01:03:23,675
But you're not, so.

1603
01:03:23,675 --> 01:03:26,511
I had no idea at the
time it was a test.

1604
01:03:26,511 --> 01:03:29,264
I just thought
I got lucky, you know?

1605
01:03:29,264 --> 01:03:30,932
♪

1606
01:03:30,932 --> 01:03:33,727
I went through
a series of tests

1607
01:03:33,727 --> 01:03:35,812
that went on for four months.

1608
01:03:35,812 --> 01:03:37,105
(yelling)

1609
01:03:37,105 --> 01:03:45,905
♪

1610
01:03:45,905 --> 01:03:50,118
Mm--shaken, not stirred.

1611
01:03:50,118 --> 01:03:51,286
After all of that,

1612
01:03:51,286 --> 01:03:53,413
United Artists wanted
to see me do a fight scene.

1613
01:03:53,413 --> 01:03:55,206
Peter Hunt kept saying,
"He's Australian!

1614
01:03:55,206 --> 01:03:56,624
All Australians can fight."

1615
01:03:56,624 --> 01:03:59,169
The stunt men gave me
five minutes' training.

1616
01:03:59,169 --> 01:04:00,295
-Action!
-Missed the first

1617
01:04:00,295 --> 01:04:01,212
couple of guys,

1618
01:04:01,212 --> 01:04:02,797
and one of the
stunt guys came up

1619
01:04:02,797 --> 01:04:04,966
and I hit him
right in the chin.

1620
01:04:04,966 --> 01:04:06,801
He went down, he's wriggling
on the ground like this.

1621
01:04:06,801 --> 01:04:09,137
I'm thinking, "Oh my god,
what have I done?"

1622
01:04:09,137 --> 01:04:10,555
Harry steps over
and grabs my arm,

1623
01:04:10,555 --> 01:04:11,806
takes me up against the wall.

1624
01:04:11,806 --> 01:04:13,099
We're going with you.

1625
01:04:13,099 --> 01:04:15,435
-I said, "It's about time."
-It's about time.

1626
01:04:15,435 --> 01:04:16,352
What?

1627
01:04:16,352 --> 01:04:18,980
I said, "Thank you very much."

1628
01:04:18,980 --> 01:04:20,940
Harry said, "You should
call your mother."

1629
01:04:20,940 --> 01:04:22,275
Call your mother!

1630
01:04:22,275 --> 01:04:25,320
So I call up Mum,
she says, "Oh, hello, son."

1631
01:04:25,320 --> 01:04:28,907
And I said, "Mum, I just
got the James Bond job."

1632
01:04:28,907 --> 01:04:29,824
"Oh, did you?

1633
01:04:29,824 --> 01:04:32,619
You know your
license has run out."

1634
01:04:32,619 --> 01:04:37,832
♪

1635
01:04:37,832 --> 01:04:41,795
If someone told me back
when I was in my teens even

1636
01:04:41,795 --> 01:04:45,173
that I would one day
become James Bond,

1637
01:04:45,173 --> 01:04:47,801
I would think
he's out of his mind.

1638
01:04:47,801 --> 01:04:50,470
I felt that every man
wanted to be like him.

1639
01:04:50,470 --> 01:04:51,930
I did.

1640
01:04:51,930 --> 01:04:56,392
Here's a guy who had every
thing that every man wanted.

1641
01:04:56,392 --> 01:04:58,686
He used to win at gambling,

1642
01:04:58,686 --> 01:05:01,147
he always got the girl,

1643
01:05:01,147 --> 01:05:03,149
and he could shoot
people who got in his way.

1644
01:05:03,149 --> 01:05:06,319
I mean, what more
could a man want?

1645
01:05:06,319 --> 01:05:09,364
My name is Pussy Galore.

1646
01:05:09,364 --> 01:05:10,907
I must be dreaming.

1647
01:05:10,907 --> 01:05:12,283
So I had the role,

1648
01:05:12,283 --> 01:05:16,079
providing I didn't
mention it to anybody.

1649
01:05:16,079 --> 01:05:19,541
They had the cover
of Life magazine,

1650
01:05:19,541 --> 01:05:22,418
front-page picture of me
as the new James Bond,

1651
01:05:22,418 --> 01:05:23,878
before anybody else.

1652
01:05:23,878 --> 01:05:25,463
And Harry said, "Get lost.

1653
01:05:25,463 --> 01:05:27,715
Go to my travel agency,

1654
01:05:27,715 --> 01:05:28,675
go anywhere,

1655
01:05:28,675 --> 01:05:30,051
call me when you get there."

1656
01:05:30,051 --> 01:05:34,514
He didn't want any of the other
press people to get hold of me.

1657
01:05:34,514 --> 01:05:38,685
So I went off around
the South of France.

1658
01:05:38,685 --> 01:05:39,978
And guess who I called?

1659
01:05:39,978 --> 01:05:41,563
(phone rings)

1660
01:05:41,563 --> 01:05:44,482
♪

1661
01:05:44,482 --> 01:05:46,276
Hello?

1662
01:05:46,276 --> 01:05:48,111
-Belinda.
-George?

1663
01:05:48,111 --> 01:05:49,904
My heart was just pounding.

1664
01:05:49,904 --> 01:05:53,366
I told her that I got
the role of James Bond.

1665
01:05:53,366 --> 01:05:54,742
That's incredible.

1666
01:05:54,742 --> 01:05:56,953
I want you here
with me to celebrate,

1667
01:05:56,953 --> 01:05:58,121
just like old times.

1668
01:05:58,121 --> 01:05:59,497
Her dad picked the phone up.

1669
01:05:59,497 --> 01:06:01,749
Oh, you got lucky,
George, I hear?

1670
01:06:01,749 --> 01:06:03,251
I said, "Yeah, yeah, I did,"

1671
01:06:03,251 --> 01:06:04,711
and he didn't
like me, of course.

1672
01:06:04,711 --> 01:06:08,923
Classwise he was
on the top of the heap

1673
01:06:08,923 --> 01:06:11,342
and I was somewhere
around the bottom.

1674
01:06:11,342 --> 01:06:15,722
I felt "Now, Jack, I'm on
your level," you know?

1675
01:06:15,722 --> 01:06:17,223
He said, "What are you
going to do with my daughter

1676
01:06:17,223 --> 01:06:18,641
down in the South of France?"

1677
01:06:18,641 --> 01:06:22,604
I said, "Nothing I
haven't done before."

1678
01:06:22,604 --> 01:06:24,981
Did he just say, "Nothing
I haven't done before?"

1679
01:06:24,981 --> 01:06:26,608
Yes, that's
exactly what he said.

1680
01:06:26,608 --> 01:06:27,817
Mm-hm.

1681
01:06:27,817 --> 01:06:28,943
(slams receiver down)

1682
01:06:28,943 --> 01:06:30,028
And she got on a plane,

1683
01:06:30,028 --> 01:06:31,654
she was heading down
to the South of France

1684
01:06:31,654 --> 01:06:33,281
from London.

1685
01:06:33,281 --> 01:06:35,325
(phone rings)

1686
01:06:35,325 --> 01:06:38,281
But in those two hours,
Harry calls me up.

1687
01:06:38,281 --> 01:06:39,027
Hello.

1688
01:06:39,027 --> 01:06:40,622
He said, "Hey, get
your ass back to London."

1689
01:06:40,622 --> 01:06:41,831
I said, "What for?"

1690
01:06:41,831 --> 01:06:44,292
He said, "We're having
a press conference tomorrow."

1691
01:06:44,292 --> 01:06:45,501
Clunk.

1692
01:06:45,501 --> 01:07:04,354
♪

1693
01:07:04,354 --> 01:07:08,816
(laughter)

1694
01:07:08,816 --> 01:07:10,443
-Um...
-Oh.

1695
01:07:10,443 --> 01:07:15,615
♪

1696
01:07:15,615 --> 01:07:17,575
What's the matter?

1697
01:07:17,575 --> 01:07:21,496
And I said, "I've gotta go
back to London straight away."

1698
01:07:21,496 --> 01:07:22,455
What?

1699
01:07:22,455 --> 01:07:25,625
Yeah, I--things are
so crazy right now.

1700
01:07:25,625 --> 01:07:27,752
But it's good, really good,

1701
01:07:27,752 --> 01:07:30,046
but I just got a phone call

1702
01:07:30,046 --> 01:07:31,673
and they need me
back there now,

1703
01:07:31,673 --> 01:07:33,299
I have to go.

1704
01:07:33,299 --> 01:07:35,385
When are you coming back?

1705
01:07:35,385 --> 01:07:38,888
Oh, god, tomorrow,
day after tomorrow, max.

1706
01:07:38,888 --> 01:07:41,683
-I promise.
-Okay.

1707
01:07:41,683 --> 01:07:43,559
So I sent her to the hotel,

1708
01:07:43,559 --> 01:07:45,853
and I said, "I'll come
back as soon as I can,

1709
01:07:45,853 --> 01:07:48,231
it'll probably be tomorrow
or the day after tomorrow."

1710
01:07:48,231 --> 01:08:06,291
♪

1711
01:08:06,291 --> 01:08:08,376
Never happened.

1712
01:08:08,376 --> 01:08:11,421
I thought that I'd be back
in a couple of days.

1713
01:08:11,421 --> 01:08:15,133
I had no idea
it would be many years

1714
01:08:15,133 --> 01:08:16,843
before I saw her again.

1715
01:08:16,843 --> 01:08:21,389
She, meanwhile, got
married and had kids.

1716
01:08:21,389 --> 01:08:23,725
We ran into each other
I think it was about

1717
01:08:23,725 --> 01:08:25,560
20 years later.

1718
01:08:29,939 --> 01:08:33,901
Life would have been different

1719
01:08:33,901 --> 01:08:35,611
if I'd have come back.

1720
01:08:38,114 --> 01:08:40,158
Phew.

1721
01:08:40,158 --> 01:08:43,953
She was a beauty, good woman.

1722
01:08:43,953 --> 01:08:45,204
I just...

1723
01:08:48,875 --> 01:08:50,209
You know, it's one
of those things

1724
01:08:50,209 --> 01:08:54,297
when timing doesn't work out
the way you want it to

1725
01:08:54,297 --> 01:08:58,718
and it was meant to be.

1726
01:09:07,518 --> 01:09:10,104
Tell me, what were
you doing before this?

1727
01:09:10,104 --> 01:09:12,148
I was a model.

1728
01:09:12,148 --> 01:09:13,232
If you want to go right back,

1729
01:09:13,232 --> 01:09:15,193
I was a salesman and
a mechanic before that.

1730
01:09:15,193 --> 01:09:17,695
What really drew you
to applying for this job?

1731
01:09:17,695 --> 01:09:20,907
Well, it was on the
recommendation of a friend

1732
01:09:20,907 --> 01:09:22,241
called Maggie Abbott.

1733
01:09:22,241 --> 01:09:23,618
Peter Hunt, you have
there next to you

1734
01:09:23,618 --> 01:09:25,745
a man who is not an actor

1735
01:09:25,745 --> 01:09:28,289
and who is going to be
perhaps the most famous actor

1736
01:09:28,289 --> 01:09:29,332
in the years to come.

1737
01:09:29,332 --> 01:09:30,458
No, you're making a mistake.

1738
01:09:30,458 --> 01:09:31,959
Nobody's going to make
him a famous actor.

1739
01:09:31,959 --> 01:09:35,296
They're going to
make him a film star.

1740
01:09:35,296 --> 01:09:38,549
There were a lot of press there
from all different countries.

1741
01:09:38,549 --> 01:09:41,302
-George?
-George?

1742
01:09:41,302 --> 01:09:43,971
And I was sipping on
a white wine or something

1743
01:09:43,971 --> 01:09:47,600
and smoking a cigarette,
just talking to them.

1744
01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:48,726
I didn't know what I was doing.

1745
01:09:48,726 --> 01:09:50,812
What worries you most
about taking on

1746
01:09:50,812 --> 01:09:53,815
a multi-million-dollar
movie like this?

1747
01:09:53,815 --> 01:09:55,817
♪

1748
01:09:55,817 --> 01:09:57,276
Being able to do it well.

1749
01:09:57,276 --> 01:09:59,070
That's what I'm hoping
to be able to do.

1750
01:09:59,070 --> 01:10:01,155
And I was thinking,

1751
01:10:01,155 --> 01:10:03,783
"What the fuck have
I got myself into?"

1752
01:10:03,783 --> 01:10:05,618
(laughing)

1753
01:10:05,618 --> 01:10:08,287
♪

1754
01:10:08,287 --> 01:10:09,789
So we went off to Switzerland,

1755
01:10:09,789 --> 01:10:12,875
and now it's time
to shoot the movie.

1756
01:10:12,875 --> 01:10:14,711
I'd never been on a film set.

1757
01:10:14,711 --> 01:10:15,795
You've got hundreds of crew,

1758
01:10:15,795 --> 01:10:18,381
you've got stunt crew,
you've got helicopters,

1759
01:10:18,381 --> 01:10:21,342
and it's really
a big, big thing.

1760
01:10:21,342 --> 01:10:22,927
And you're the central figure.

1761
01:10:22,927 --> 01:10:26,431
Everyone was experienced
in the major roles.

1762
01:10:26,431 --> 01:10:28,933
Diana Rigg and Telly Savalas.

1763
01:10:28,933 --> 01:10:31,769
They'd been working
as actors for decades.

1764
01:10:31,769 --> 01:10:33,730
George, obviously, there's
going to be some comparison

1765
01:10:33,730 --> 01:10:35,815
between yourself
and Sean Connery.

1766
01:10:35,815 --> 01:10:37,024
How do you think
this comparison

1767
01:10:37,024 --> 01:10:39,944
will affect your image?

1768
01:10:39,944 --> 01:10:42,321
Sean Connery
created James Bond.

1769
01:10:42,321 --> 01:10:44,574
How can I be better
than Sean Connery

1770
01:10:44,574 --> 01:10:46,033
playing James Bond?

1771
01:10:46,033 --> 01:10:47,368
Mr...

1772
01:10:47,368 --> 01:10:50,663
Bond, James Bond.

1773
01:10:50,663 --> 01:10:53,040
I'm not an actor,
I never had any thoughts

1774
01:10:53,040 --> 01:10:54,375
that I might
be good as him,

1775
01:10:54,375 --> 01:10:58,129
because he created the
character from his character,

1776
01:10:58,129 --> 01:10:59,964
from his personality.

1777
01:10:59,964 --> 01:11:04,010
I realized very early
that people wanted to see

1778
01:11:04,010 --> 01:11:05,553
Sean Connery's version.

1779
01:11:05,553 --> 01:11:08,848
♪

1780
01:11:08,848 --> 01:11:11,851
I had a "G'day, mate"
Australian accent

1781
01:11:11,851 --> 01:11:14,562
that they couldn't
use for James Bond.

1782
01:11:14,562 --> 01:11:17,023
And they said, "He's
gotta change his walk too,"

1783
01:11:17,023 --> 01:11:19,567
because when they
put me on CinemaScope,

1784
01:11:19,567 --> 01:11:21,194
I walked like this,

1785
01:11:21,194 --> 01:11:23,988
and so I'd go right
across the screen.

1786
01:11:23,988 --> 01:11:26,240
So they said,
"Gotta change his walk

1787
01:11:26,240 --> 01:11:27,742
and you gotta change
his accent."

1788
01:11:27,742 --> 01:11:29,577
So it wasn't,
"My name's Bond,

1789
01:11:29,577 --> 01:11:31,370
James Bond.

1790
01:11:31,370 --> 01:11:32,663
007."

1791
01:11:32,663 --> 01:11:34,999
Hey, give us a martini.

1792
01:11:34,999 --> 01:11:36,876
Shake it, stir it,

1793
01:11:36,876 --> 01:11:38,252
I don't care,
I'll drink anything.

1794
01:11:38,252 --> 01:11:40,963
My voice coach, she would
lay me down on the floor...

1795
01:11:40,963 --> 01:11:42,423
My name's Bond.

1796
01:11:42,423 --> 01:11:43,508
Put a match in my mouth...

1797
01:11:43,508 --> 01:11:45,176
James Bond.

1798
01:11:45,176 --> 01:11:46,677
Then draw that out.

1799
01:11:46,677 --> 01:11:48,012
James Bond.

1800
01:11:48,012 --> 01:11:49,472
But she'd stop
the muscles moving

1801
01:11:49,472 --> 01:11:51,098
that creates the
Australian accent.

1802
01:11:51,098 --> 01:11:53,226
Make you talk
like an Englishman.

1803
01:11:53,226 --> 01:11:58,189
My oh my, what a
lovely ceiling you have.

1804
01:11:58,189 --> 01:12:00,942
I had to be
this English toughie.

1805
01:12:00,942 --> 01:12:03,778
My, what a lovely
ceiling you have.

1806
01:12:03,778 --> 01:12:05,571
Moneypenny, shut up.

1807
01:12:05,571 --> 01:12:08,366
You shut your mouth,
Miss Moneypenny.

1808
01:12:08,366 --> 01:12:11,953
My name's Bond,
James Bond.

1809
01:12:11,953 --> 01:12:13,287
And then as I was leaving,

1810
01:12:13,287 --> 01:12:15,248
my voice coach said:

1811
01:12:15,248 --> 01:12:16,833
"You know...

1812
01:12:16,833 --> 01:12:18,626
I feel sorry for you."

1813
01:12:18,626 --> 01:12:20,044
And I thought,

1814
01:12:20,044 --> 01:12:21,879
"Sorry for me, why?"

1815
01:12:21,879 --> 01:12:25,132
Said, "You're taking
on a hell of a role."

1816
01:12:25,132 --> 01:12:27,134
♪

1817
01:12:27,134 --> 01:12:29,595
Your life is
going to change.

1818
01:12:29,595 --> 01:12:34,475
♪

1819
01:12:37,812 --> 01:12:40,648
Next day,
we're doing the titles.

1820
01:12:40,648 --> 01:12:42,525
They said, "Do it the way
Connery does it."

1821
01:12:42,525 --> 01:12:44,110
"Just turn and shoot."

1822
01:12:44,110 --> 01:12:45,987
-Ready?
-I don't know why I did it.

1823
01:12:45,987 --> 01:12:47,738
-Action.
-On the first take,

1824
01:12:47,738 --> 01:12:48,865
for some reason or other,

1825
01:12:48,865 --> 01:12:50,241
I went to one knee...

1826
01:12:50,241 --> 01:12:52,285
(gunshot)

1827
01:12:52,285 --> 01:12:53,327
What was that?

1828
01:12:53,327 --> 01:12:54,829
Must turn and shoot.

1829
01:12:54,829 --> 01:12:56,664
I said the way
Connery does it.

1830
01:12:56,664 --> 01:12:58,666
What's this
kneeling down business?

1831
01:12:58,666 --> 01:13:00,334
What's the point of
doing it like Connery?

1832
01:13:00,334 --> 01:13:01,794
You've got Lazenby.

1833
01:13:01,794 --> 01:13:03,629
Do it like George
doing Connery.

1834
01:13:03,629 --> 01:13:06,674
Standing, turning,
standing, shooting.

1835
01:13:06,674 --> 01:13:08,134
No kneeling down.

1836
01:13:08,134 --> 01:13:09,760
So just a turn
and shoot then.

1837
01:13:09,760 --> 01:13:11,012
Turn and shoot.

1838
01:13:11,012 --> 01:13:13,973
-Did that.
-Like Connery.

1839
01:13:13,973 --> 01:13:15,308
Write down "silly."

1840
01:13:15,308 --> 01:13:17,602
He's being a silly boy.

1841
01:13:17,602 --> 01:13:19,020
(clearing throat)

1842
01:13:19,020 --> 01:13:21,522
Here we go.

1843
01:13:21,522 --> 01:13:22,773
(gunshot)

1844
01:13:22,773 --> 01:13:24,150
Oh, now you're
having a little laugh.

1845
01:13:24,150 --> 01:13:25,359
No, I thought I saw
someone behind me.

1846
01:13:25,359 --> 01:13:27,028
Oh, yes,
of course you did.

1847
01:13:27,028 --> 01:13:28,154
Do you want to play games?

1848
01:13:28,154 --> 01:13:29,697
Sure, we'll play
games with him.

1849
01:13:29,697 --> 01:13:30,865
Isn't this fun?

1850
01:13:30,865 --> 01:13:32,033
Back to one, let's go.

1851
01:13:32,033 --> 01:13:33,367
Behave yourself now.

1852
01:13:33,367 --> 01:13:34,493
It's your time too.

1853
01:13:34,493 --> 01:13:35,453
But out of the first two,

1854
01:13:35,453 --> 01:13:37,038
which--which one
did you prefer?

1855
01:13:37,038 --> 01:13:37,914
Quit it!

1856
01:13:37,914 --> 01:13:39,624
I've had enough
of this bullshit.

1857
01:13:39,624 --> 01:13:40,875
I think I'm getting
it, I'm getting it.

1858
01:13:40,875 --> 01:13:42,793
Stop mucking about
and do it right.

1859
01:13:42,793 --> 01:13:45,046
♪

1860
01:13:45,046 --> 01:13:46,255
(gunshot)

1861
01:13:46,255 --> 01:13:47,673
My God, I've had it.

1862
01:13:47,673 --> 01:13:49,258
I'm taking five,
everyone take five.

1863
01:13:49,258 --> 01:13:51,135
That's it, come on.

1864
01:13:51,135 --> 01:13:52,303
It was a warning shot.

1865
01:13:52,303 --> 01:13:53,763
♪

1866
01:13:53,763 --> 01:13:55,806
I thought that's how
the blood trickles down

1867
01:13:55,806 --> 01:13:57,058
in front of the camera.

1868
01:13:57,058 --> 01:13:58,768
In my film,
they used the one

1869
01:13:58,768 --> 01:14:00,353
that they told
me not to do.

1870
01:14:00,353 --> 01:14:01,729
(gunshot)

1871
01:14:01,729 --> 01:14:02,939
I'm so creative.

1872
01:14:02,939 --> 01:14:04,065
(chuckling)

1873
01:14:04,065 --> 01:14:05,483
♪

1874
01:14:05,483 --> 01:14:06,525
Good morning.

1875
01:14:06,525 --> 01:14:08,903
My name's Bond,
James Bond.

1876
01:14:08,903 --> 01:14:10,112
And after a while,

1877
01:14:10,112 --> 01:14:12,073
I started having
fun with it.

1878
01:14:12,073 --> 01:14:14,075
I--I really didn't know

1879
01:14:14,075 --> 01:14:15,660
whether I was good or not.

1880
01:14:15,660 --> 01:14:17,703
I was just doin'
the best I could.

1881
01:14:17,703 --> 01:14:20,081
You're very sure of
yourself, aren't you?

1882
01:14:20,081 --> 01:14:22,124
Suppose I were to
kill you for a thrill.

1883
01:14:22,124 --> 01:14:24,752
I can think of something
more sociable to do.

1884
01:14:24,752 --> 01:14:26,170
I was working
with good people.

1885
01:14:26,170 --> 01:14:29,340
Telly Savalas,
Diana Rigg, and...

1886
01:14:29,340 --> 01:14:30,466
Angela Scoular.

1887
01:14:30,466 --> 01:14:32,093
She was quite funny.

1888
01:14:32,093 --> 01:14:33,594
We played a trick
on Angela.

1889
01:14:33,594 --> 01:14:35,262
Angela had to
put her hand up

1890
01:14:35,262 --> 01:14:36,973
inside the kilt,

1891
01:14:36,973 --> 01:14:39,767
and put a room number
on the side of my leg.

1892
01:14:39,767 --> 01:14:40,935
And so just before that,

1893
01:14:40,935 --> 01:14:45,356
the props guys heated
up a big German sausage...

1894
01:14:45,356 --> 01:14:47,274
and taped it to
the inside of my leg

1895
01:14:47,274 --> 01:14:48,484
when I had a kilt on.

1896
01:14:48,484 --> 01:14:50,444
Of course,
if you think so, Fraulein.

1897
01:14:50,444 --> 01:14:52,488
And she put the
hand up there...

1898
01:14:52,488 --> 01:14:56,909
♪

1899
01:14:56,909 --> 01:15:00,621
And completes the scene
without a reaction.

1900
01:15:00,621 --> 01:15:01,956
♪

1901
01:15:01,956 --> 01:15:03,416
And all the crew
guys are goin'...

1902
01:15:03,416 --> 01:15:04,583
♪

1903
01:15:04,583 --> 01:15:06,669
And then she
whispers in my ear,

1904
01:15:06,669 --> 01:15:08,087
"You got no pants on."

1905
01:15:08,087 --> 01:15:10,464
♪

1906
01:15:10,464 --> 01:15:13,134
Is anything the matter?

1907
01:15:13,134 --> 01:15:15,344
Just a slight
stiffness coming on.

1908
01:15:15,344 --> 01:15:16,470
(laughing)

1909
01:15:16,470 --> 01:15:21,350
♪

1910
01:15:21,350 --> 01:15:22,935
All right,
let's do take two.

1911
01:15:22,935 --> 01:15:24,437
Action!

1912
01:15:24,437 --> 01:15:26,230
There was all kinds
of crazy stuff.

1913
01:15:26,230 --> 01:15:27,940
Run!

1914
01:15:27,940 --> 01:15:29,650
Stunt fighting.

1915
01:15:29,650 --> 01:15:31,402
Hangin' off ropes.

1916
01:15:31,402 --> 01:15:33,029
I can remember
the knife thrower

1917
01:15:33,029 --> 01:15:34,196
couldn't hit
the target.

1918
01:15:34,196 --> 01:15:36,907
I'd been throwing knives
ever since a little kid.

1919
01:15:36,907 --> 01:15:38,701
So I took over
the knife throwing.

1920
01:15:38,701 --> 01:15:39,952
♪

1921
01:15:39,952 --> 01:15:41,287
One of the stuntmen said,

1922
01:15:41,287 --> 01:15:43,164
"George shouldn't be
jumpin' out of the helicopters

1923
01:15:43,164 --> 01:15:44,874
and hangin' off cables.

1924
01:15:44,874 --> 01:15:46,459
What if he dies?"

1925
01:15:46,459 --> 01:15:51,422
♪

1926
01:15:51,422 --> 01:15:53,632
He said, "No one's
seen him yet.

1927
01:15:53,632 --> 01:15:54,675
We can get a new one

1928
01:15:54,675 --> 01:15:55,968
and do it all over again."

1929
01:15:55,968 --> 01:16:01,140
♪

1930
01:16:01,140 --> 01:16:04,101
After a while, I felt
really comfortable on the set,

1931
01:16:04,101 --> 01:16:06,353
and if I was in fear,
I wouldn't show it.

1932
01:16:06,353 --> 01:16:08,355
I think he's
a little bit of every man,

1933
01:16:08,355 --> 01:16:10,441
or at least every man
thinks he...

1934
01:16:10,441 --> 01:16:12,193
has some of
James Bond in him.

1935
01:16:12,193 --> 01:16:13,819
Have you seen
our new James Bond?

1936
01:16:13,819 --> 01:16:15,571
He's tall, dark,
and handsome.

1937
01:16:15,571 --> 01:16:18,199
I was startin' to feel,
you know, important

1938
01:16:18,199 --> 01:16:19,366
in my own self.

1939
01:16:19,366 --> 01:16:20,785
I think he's gorgeous.

1940
01:16:20,785 --> 01:16:21,786
Charming.

1941
01:16:21,786 --> 01:16:23,329
'Cause I'm no longer
a male model,

1942
01:16:23,329 --> 01:16:24,872
I'm now a superstar.

1943
01:16:24,872 --> 01:16:27,541
I think he's very sexy
and very confident,

1944
01:16:27,541 --> 01:16:29,627
a natural for
James Bond.

1945
01:16:29,627 --> 01:16:34,006
♪ Luck be a lady tonight ♪

1946
01:16:34,006 --> 01:16:36,133
There were a lot of
women on the film.

1947
01:16:36,133 --> 01:16:39,970
♪ Luck be a lady tonight ♪

1948
01:16:39,970 --> 01:16:41,097
And thank God for that,

1949
01:16:41,097 --> 01:16:43,474
because I was
there nine months.

1950
01:16:43,474 --> 01:16:44,433
(clears throat)

1951
01:16:44,433 --> 01:16:46,185
And you get to know them.

1952
01:16:46,185 --> 01:16:47,686
How do you do?

1953
01:16:47,686 --> 01:16:48,729
Thank you.

1954
01:16:48,729 --> 01:16:50,731
Like, uh...

1955
01:16:50,731 --> 01:16:52,399
which one do
you fancy first?

1956
01:16:52,399 --> 01:16:53,734
(laughing)

1957
01:16:53,734 --> 01:16:55,778
I remember one morning
I opened the door.

1958
01:16:55,778 --> 01:16:59,323
The girls got one
of the stunt dolls.

1959
01:16:59,323 --> 01:17:00,407
They had a note on it,

1960
01:17:00,407 --> 01:17:02,827
"Here's one you
haven't had, George."

1961
01:17:02,827 --> 01:17:04,245
That's true.

1962
01:17:04,245 --> 01:17:05,579
You were having fun.

1963
01:17:05,579 --> 01:17:07,289
They were having
fun with me.

1964
01:17:07,289 --> 01:17:09,250
I don't even
know your name.

1965
01:17:09,250 --> 01:17:12,086
I'll tell you
all about myself...

1966
01:17:12,086 --> 01:17:13,337
later.

1967
01:17:13,337 --> 01:17:15,005
♪

1968
01:17:15,005 --> 01:17:17,508
(speaking French poorly)

1969
01:17:20,302 --> 01:17:22,138
Another coffee,
atta boy.

1970
01:17:22,138 --> 01:17:24,932
On my day off,
I was in a cafe,

1971
01:17:24,932 --> 01:17:25,975
and all of a sudden,

1972
01:17:25,975 --> 01:17:28,144
the front of the shop
was completely smothered

1973
01:17:28,144 --> 01:17:30,187
with people telling
other people that,

1974
01:17:30,187 --> 01:17:31,397
"That's James
Bond in there.

1975
01:17:31,397 --> 01:17:32,648
That's the new one."

1976
01:17:32,648 --> 01:17:35,442
♪

1977
01:17:35,442 --> 01:17:37,570
And that kind of gave
me a little bigger head.

1978
01:17:37,570 --> 01:17:39,321
(laughing)

1979
01:17:39,321 --> 01:17:41,448
(chuckling)

1980
01:17:41,448 --> 01:17:42,491
Ah, it's all right.

1981
01:17:42,491 --> 01:17:44,243
I can remember being
in the production office

1982
01:17:44,243 --> 01:17:45,244
one day on the film.

1983
01:17:45,244 --> 01:17:46,328
I'm here to get
my per diem.

1984
01:17:46,328 --> 01:17:47,538
To get my per diem.

1985
01:17:47,538 --> 01:17:48,873
It was a hundred
dollars a week.

1986
01:17:48,873 --> 01:17:51,041
How come I'm only makin'
a hundred dollars a week?

1987
01:17:51,041 --> 01:17:52,293
How much the
other fella get?

1988
01:17:52,293 --> 01:17:53,961
Says, "A thousand a week."

1989
01:17:53,961 --> 01:17:56,338
And I looked at Harry
with a look like...

1990
01:17:56,338 --> 01:17:57,965
"I'm doing the same thing."

1991
01:17:57,965 --> 01:18:00,926
Fine, give him
a thousand a week.

1992
01:18:00,926 --> 01:18:02,970
-That was my confidence.
-Good on you, Harry.

1993
01:18:02,970 --> 01:18:05,723
Where other people were
going around kissing ass,

1994
01:18:05,723 --> 01:18:08,350
I'd be tellin'
'em what I want.

1995
01:18:08,350 --> 01:18:17,484
♪

1996
01:18:17,484 --> 01:18:18,944
I said, "Peter,
that's the last time

1997
01:18:18,944 --> 01:18:20,821
I do my own bloody
stunts, you bastard."

1998
01:18:20,821 --> 01:18:22,781
They allowed me to
have private planes

1999
01:18:22,781 --> 01:18:24,658
and go into town.

2000
01:18:24,658 --> 01:18:26,410
So I'd take one
of the girls with me.

2001
01:18:26,410 --> 01:18:27,703
Oh, sorry--ooh,
I have a feeling

2002
01:18:27,703 --> 01:18:29,455
there's a little bit
of turbulence here.

2003
01:18:29,455 --> 01:18:30,915
♪

2004
01:18:30,915 --> 01:18:32,291
It's okay, I've got you.

2005
01:18:32,291 --> 01:18:33,500
♪

2006
01:18:33,500 --> 01:18:35,920
(laughing)

2007
01:18:35,920 --> 01:18:37,087
You feel better?

2008
01:18:37,087 --> 01:18:38,797
♪

2009
01:18:38,797 --> 01:18:41,091
I'd find somewhere
to go every night.

2010
01:18:41,091 --> 01:18:42,509
(laughing)

2011
01:18:42,509 --> 01:18:45,054
I said, "Telly,
you get a haircut."

2012
01:18:45,054 --> 01:18:46,055
(laughing)

2013
01:18:46,055 --> 01:18:47,181
That's the truth.

2014
01:18:47,181 --> 01:18:49,683
I was drinking at least
a bottle of vodka a day.

2015
01:18:49,683 --> 01:18:52,228
Whoa, I was about to say!

2016
01:18:52,228 --> 01:18:55,022
♪

2017
01:18:55,022 --> 01:18:56,732
Mm, more, more,
more, more.

2018
01:18:56,732 --> 01:18:59,526
And smoking, you know,
as many weeds as I could.

2019
01:18:59,526 --> 01:19:01,320
♪

2020
01:19:01,320 --> 01:19:03,364
That's Bond,
that's the new Bond!

2021
01:19:03,364 --> 01:19:05,115
Oh, is that him?

2022
01:19:05,115 --> 01:19:07,451
-What's his name?
-Hey, Bond!

2023
01:19:07,451 --> 01:19:11,121
♪

2024
01:19:11,121 --> 01:19:12,957
I didn't go to bed
till three or four

2025
01:19:12,957 --> 01:19:14,708
in the morning
every night.

2026
01:19:14,708 --> 01:20:03,340
♪

2027
01:20:03,340 --> 01:20:07,553
It's a fascinating
experience, fame.

2028
01:20:07,553 --> 01:20:11,932
Changed my life
in lots of ways.

2029
01:20:11,932 --> 01:20:13,600
People would
offer me money

2030
01:20:13,600 --> 01:20:14,935
to go to a party,

2031
01:20:14,935 --> 01:20:18,022
to show up
at their party.

2032
01:20:18,022 --> 01:20:19,940
And it's not me,
I didn't do that.

2033
01:20:19,940 --> 01:20:21,984
It was James Bond.

2034
01:20:21,984 --> 01:20:23,777
You know, "James Bond's
comin' to my party."

2035
01:20:23,777 --> 01:20:26,322
You know, that's
not George Lazenby.

2036
01:20:26,322 --> 01:20:28,073
(laughing)

2037
01:20:28,073 --> 01:20:30,451
Were you aware of
that at the time?

2038
01:20:30,451 --> 01:20:32,786
Uh, not totally.

2039
01:20:32,786 --> 01:20:34,496
You kind of...

2040
01:20:34,496 --> 01:20:35,622
you think you're somebody,

2041
01:20:35,622 --> 01:20:37,207
you know, until the
rug gets pulled out

2042
01:20:37,207 --> 01:20:38,417
from under you.

2043
01:20:38,417 --> 01:20:40,878
♪

2044
01:20:40,878 --> 01:20:42,379
The new Bond.

2045
01:20:42,379 --> 01:20:44,173
♪

2046
01:20:44,173 --> 01:20:46,467
If you think you
know your Bond,

2047
01:20:46,467 --> 01:20:48,010
think again.

2048
01:20:48,010 --> 01:20:49,428
This one's different.

2049
01:20:49,428 --> 01:20:50,804
It's true!

2050
01:20:50,804 --> 01:20:52,222
Lazenby,

2051
01:20:52,222 --> 01:20:53,766
George Lazenby.

2052
01:20:53,766 --> 01:20:55,267
The different Bond.

2053
01:20:55,267 --> 01:20:57,061
♪

2054
01:20:57,061 --> 01:20:58,479
So after we
wrapped the movie,

2055
01:20:58,479 --> 01:20:59,855
the film was coming out,

2056
01:20:59,855 --> 01:21:01,106
and I hadn't seen it,

2057
01:21:01,106 --> 01:21:02,775
but I must have done
a pretty good job

2058
01:21:02,775 --> 01:21:04,360
because they
wanted me to sign

2059
01:21:04,360 --> 01:21:06,445
for six more Bond films.

2060
01:21:06,445 --> 01:21:08,280
♪

2061
01:21:08,280 --> 01:21:11,116
The film is a fantastic
box office success.

2062
01:21:11,116 --> 01:21:13,035
♪

2063
01:21:13,035 --> 01:21:14,953
But in America,
Mr. Lazenby himself

2064
01:21:14,953 --> 01:21:16,789
has been voted the most
promising newcomer

2065
01:21:16,789 --> 01:21:18,540
of the year.

2066
01:21:18,540 --> 01:21:22,461
I went the whole film
without signing the contract.

2067
01:21:22,461 --> 01:21:24,171
And the United Artists

2068
01:21:24,171 --> 01:21:26,715
were getting
on their case.

2069
01:21:26,715 --> 01:21:29,343
"How could you let
that guy finish the movie

2070
01:21:29,343 --> 01:21:30,928
without signing
the contract?"

2071
01:21:30,928 --> 01:21:33,680
♪

2072
01:21:33,680 --> 01:21:36,183
So they had to
coax me along.

2073
01:21:36,183 --> 01:21:38,936
Sign the fucking contract.

2074
01:21:38,936 --> 01:21:40,020
♪

2075
01:21:40,020 --> 01:21:41,855
It was called
a slave contract

2076
01:21:41,855 --> 01:21:43,524
where they tell
you how to dress

2077
01:21:43,524 --> 01:21:45,526
and what you can do
and what you can't do,

2078
01:21:45,526 --> 01:21:47,194
what kind of films
you can be in.

2079
01:21:47,194 --> 01:21:48,570
It's simple.

2080
01:21:48,570 --> 01:21:51,281
Sign it, become rich.

2081
01:21:51,281 --> 01:21:52,783
What have we here?

2082
01:21:52,783 --> 01:21:53,867
♪

2083
01:21:53,867 --> 01:21:55,119
That's when Harry
offered me

2084
01:21:55,119 --> 01:21:57,246
a million dollars
under the table.

2085
01:21:57,246 --> 01:21:59,456
Yeah.

2086
01:21:59,456 --> 01:22:01,959
To sign the effing contract.

2087
01:22:01,959 --> 01:22:03,877
Ronan O'Rahilly, who was
my manager at the time,

2088
01:22:03,877 --> 01:22:04,878
said, "Don't worry
about that,

2089
01:22:04,878 --> 01:22:06,839
there's a guy called
Clint Eastwood.

2090
01:22:06,839 --> 01:22:08,215
He's gettin' 500 grand.

2091
01:22:08,215 --> 01:22:09,383
You'll be able
to make two movies

2092
01:22:09,383 --> 01:22:11,427
in six weeks,
you'll get a million bucks."

2093
01:22:11,427 --> 01:22:13,262
Go ahead.

2094
01:22:13,262 --> 01:22:18,892
♪

2095
01:22:18,892 --> 01:22:20,227
I'll have to
think about it.

2096
01:22:20,227 --> 01:22:21,228
♪

2097
01:22:21,228 --> 01:22:22,563
You're an idiot.

2098
01:22:22,563 --> 01:22:24,273
You really are an idiot.

2099
01:22:24,273 --> 01:22:26,150
What's there to think about?

2100
01:22:26,150 --> 01:22:27,276
♪

2101
01:22:27,276 --> 01:22:28,694
And he got up
and stomped off

2102
01:22:28,694 --> 01:22:30,696
because if I won't
change my mind

2103
01:22:30,696 --> 01:22:32,030
for a million dollars,
what can I do?

2104
01:22:32,030 --> 01:22:34,575
He's a man who appears
to know his own mind,

2105
01:22:34,575 --> 01:22:36,118
and has maintained
a stubborn sense

2106
01:22:36,118 --> 01:22:37,494
of individuality.

2107
01:22:37,494 --> 01:22:38,745
He grew a beard,
for instance,

2108
01:22:38,745 --> 01:22:39,746
and refused
to shave it off

2109
01:22:39,746 --> 01:22:40,998
for the film premiere.

2110
01:22:40,998 --> 01:22:42,458
I naturally
grew a beard

2111
01:22:42,458 --> 01:22:43,417
because first of all,

2112
01:22:43,417 --> 01:22:45,752
it would stop me
being recognized,

2113
01:22:45,752 --> 01:22:48,755
and I can remember
gettin' a call saying:

2114
01:22:48,755 --> 01:22:50,549
Don't come to the
premiere of the movie

2115
01:22:50,549 --> 01:22:51,800
if you're gonna
have a beard.

2116
01:22:51,800 --> 01:22:53,635
You ruin everything
with your beard!

2117
01:22:53,635 --> 01:22:54,595
Don't you get it?

2118
01:22:54,595 --> 01:22:56,180
Bond doesn't
have a beard!

2119
01:22:56,180 --> 01:22:57,347
Hippie piece of...

2120
01:22:57,347 --> 01:22:58,557
♪

2121
01:23:00,309 --> 01:23:02,269
But I did show up...

2122
01:23:02,269 --> 01:23:03,604
with a beard.

2123
01:23:03,604 --> 01:23:07,816
♪

2124
01:23:07,816 --> 01:23:10,110
It was, you know,
royal premiere.

2125
01:23:10,110 --> 01:23:11,612
♪

2126
01:23:11,612 --> 01:23:14,948
I was recognized
and photographed.

2127
01:23:14,948 --> 01:23:15,991
♪

2128
01:23:15,991 --> 01:23:18,285
And I was standing
in line meeting the royals.

2129
01:23:18,285 --> 01:23:19,286
♪

2130
01:23:19,286 --> 01:23:22,206
The producers didn't
want me to go there,

2131
01:23:22,206 --> 01:23:25,667
but I had these guys
by the short and curlies,

2132
01:23:25,667 --> 01:23:27,836
'cause they had
finished the movie

2133
01:23:27,836 --> 01:23:30,631
and I hadn't
signed the contract.

2134
01:23:30,631 --> 01:23:32,132
When the film
was finished,

2135
01:23:32,132 --> 01:23:34,009
you went on
a publicity tour

2136
01:23:34,009 --> 01:23:35,010
of the United States,

2137
01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:36,553
which you paid
for yourself.

2138
01:23:36,553 --> 01:23:38,805
-Mm.
-Why?

2139
01:23:38,805 --> 01:23:41,016
Uh, on principle.

2140
01:23:41,016 --> 01:23:43,393
Uh, I was promised
a tour of the United States

2141
01:23:43,393 --> 01:23:44,728
to publicize the film.

2142
01:23:44,728 --> 01:23:46,647
I was looking
forward to it.

2143
01:23:46,647 --> 01:23:48,524
And because of
my beard and long hair,

2144
01:23:48,524 --> 01:23:49,483
I wasn't allowed to go.

2145
01:23:49,483 --> 01:23:50,817
I was allowed to go
on the condition

2146
01:23:50,817 --> 01:23:52,402
that I looked
like James Bond.

2147
01:23:52,402 --> 01:23:54,029
The new James Bond.

2148
01:23:54,029 --> 01:23:56,406
Will you welcome
George Lazenby?

2149
01:23:56,406 --> 01:23:58,951
(applause)

2150
01:23:58,951 --> 01:24:00,160
♪

2151
01:24:00,160 --> 01:24:03,038
Most people wanted to
meet the new James Bond.

2152
01:24:03,038 --> 01:24:05,040
People like...

2153
01:24:05,040 --> 01:24:05,999
that guy.

2154
01:24:05,999 --> 01:24:07,334
And I said,
well, anyone--

2155
01:24:07,334 --> 01:24:09,211
anyone can understand
that James Bond

2156
01:24:09,211 --> 01:24:10,712
isn't a real person,

2157
01:24:10,712 --> 01:24:12,548
and they're not gonna
mind the fact that I--

2158
01:24:12,548 --> 01:24:14,341
that I haven't had
a shave for a month.

2159
01:24:14,341 --> 01:24:16,468
Welcome, and, George,
very good to have you with us.

2160
01:24:16,468 --> 01:24:18,679
One doesn't think of
James Bond with a beard.

2161
01:24:18,679 --> 01:24:20,347
Do you wear
a beard in the film?

2162
01:24:20,347 --> 01:24:22,641
Uh, no, David,
as, um...

2163
01:24:22,641 --> 01:24:24,977
as a matter of fact, uh,
I'm out of the film now

2164
01:24:24,977 --> 01:24:26,979
and I'm George Lazenby
again, you see?

2165
01:24:26,979 --> 01:24:28,772
They wanted me to stay
in the image of Bond

2166
01:24:28,772 --> 01:24:29,690
at all times.

2167
01:24:29,690 --> 01:24:31,567
Do you carry on
the James Bond thing

2168
01:24:31,567 --> 01:24:33,068
offstage, off camera?

2169
01:24:33,068 --> 01:24:34,319
No, like I said before,

2170
01:24:34,319 --> 01:24:36,947
James Bond was, uh...

2171
01:24:36,947 --> 01:24:39,116
me being an actor,
as an actor.

2172
01:24:39,116 --> 01:24:41,868
And I don't think anyone
can carry on that way.

2173
01:24:41,868 --> 01:24:44,871
It's a tough
umbrella to walk under,

2174
01:24:44,871 --> 01:24:46,832
that James Bond thing.

2175
01:24:46,832 --> 01:24:48,542
It's great
entertainment, James Bond,

2176
01:24:48,542 --> 01:24:49,793
but I don't think
it happens to us

2177
01:24:49,793 --> 01:24:51,253
in our real life.

2178
01:24:51,253 --> 01:24:54,756
You know, you've gotta
be real with yourself,

2179
01:24:54,756 --> 01:24:56,758
and it's not easy

2180
01:24:56,758 --> 01:24:59,761
with all the influences
you have coming at you.

2181
01:24:59,761 --> 01:25:00,887
My next guest is someone

2182
01:25:00,887 --> 01:25:03,348
who very soon is gonna
be a household name.

2183
01:25:03,348 --> 01:25:05,809
He has taken over
the role of James Bond

2184
01:25:05,809 --> 01:25:06,810
from Sean Connery,

2185
01:25:06,810 --> 01:25:09,229
so let's please welcome
George Lazenby.

2186
01:25:09,229 --> 01:25:11,440
(applause)

2187
01:25:11,440 --> 01:25:13,525
After I did the
David Frost Show,

2188
01:25:13,525 --> 01:25:16,194
I went on Johnny
Carson the next day,

2189
01:25:16,194 --> 01:25:19,906
and it's hard to imagine

2190
01:25:19,906 --> 01:25:22,326
someone doing this,

2191
01:25:22,326 --> 01:25:24,369
what I did, who's sane.

2192
01:25:24,369 --> 01:25:25,704
(laughing)

2193
01:25:25,704 --> 01:25:27,164
-And when he asked me...
-So what was it like

2194
01:25:27,164 --> 01:25:28,248
to be James Bond?

2195
01:25:28,248 --> 01:25:29,249
I said...

2196
01:25:29,249 --> 01:25:30,876
It was fun, but I...

2197
01:25:30,876 --> 01:25:32,294
I don't want to
do it anymore.

2198
01:25:32,294 --> 01:25:33,420
(laughter)

2199
01:25:33,420 --> 01:25:34,421
Oh, this...

2200
01:25:34,421 --> 01:25:35,922
That's good,
you should--

2201
01:25:35,922 --> 01:25:37,299
you should be over
here in my seat.

2202
01:25:37,299 --> 01:25:38,717
-Is that funny?
-He was laughing,

2203
01:25:38,717 --> 01:25:40,218
the audience was laughing.

2204
01:25:40,218 --> 01:25:41,428
That's a good line;
you're, uh,

2205
01:25:41,428 --> 01:25:42,721
you're joking, right?

2206
01:25:42,721 --> 01:25:44,222
You're not serious?

2207
01:25:44,222 --> 01:25:47,517
Yes, quite serious.

2208
01:25:47,517 --> 01:25:50,020
(crowd murmuring)

2209
01:25:52,814 --> 01:25:55,108
I turned it all down.

2210
01:25:55,108 --> 01:25:56,401
♪

2211
01:25:56,401 --> 01:25:59,363
The seven picture deal,
million dollar bonus,

2212
01:25:59,363 --> 01:26:00,781
and I said no.

2213
01:26:00,781 --> 01:26:02,157
That's a lot of money
you're passing up.

2214
01:26:02,157 --> 01:26:04,242
I mean, you ever
thought about, uh, maybe,

2215
01:26:04,242 --> 01:26:05,702
you know, just
changing your mind

2216
01:26:05,702 --> 01:26:07,788
and doing another
picture or two?

2217
01:26:07,788 --> 01:26:09,206
Well, I think I'll be okay.

2218
01:26:09,206 --> 01:26:10,415
You in the market for a car?

2219
01:26:10,415 --> 01:26:11,333
(laughter)

2220
01:26:11,333 --> 01:26:12,751
I have to wish you
the best of luck.

2221
01:26:12,751 --> 01:26:14,127
You're a very
confident young man,

2222
01:26:14,127 --> 01:26:16,296
charming young
man, and, um...

2223
01:26:16,296 --> 01:26:18,090
mm, ladies and gentlemen,

2224
01:26:18,090 --> 01:26:19,424
George Lazenby.

2225
01:26:19,424 --> 01:26:21,968
(applause)

2226
01:26:21,968 --> 01:26:31,478
♪

2227
01:26:31,478 --> 01:26:35,482
I really didn't know
how to explain it.

2228
01:26:35,482 --> 01:26:37,317
Why I did it.

2229
01:26:37,317 --> 01:26:39,861
What I was
thinking and feeling.

2230
01:26:39,861 --> 01:26:42,572
I still don't know why

2231
01:26:42,572 --> 01:26:45,325
I just didn't
feel in my heart

2232
01:26:45,325 --> 01:26:46,993
it was the right thing.

2233
01:26:46,993 --> 01:26:47,911
♪

2234
01:26:47,911 --> 01:26:49,538
It's an instinctive thing

2235
01:26:49,538 --> 01:26:51,790
that's a voice inside you.

2236
01:26:51,790 --> 01:26:54,918
And you don't think
of the consequences.

2237
01:26:54,918 --> 01:26:56,712
♪

2238
01:26:56,712 --> 01:26:59,005
I was totally
blacklisted after Bond.

2239
01:26:59,005 --> 01:27:01,425
I couldn't get on
any known film set.

2240
01:27:01,425 --> 01:27:02,759
♪

2241
01:27:02,759 --> 01:27:04,803
Five years down
the road after Bond,

2242
01:27:04,803 --> 01:27:06,722
hardly anybody took
much notice of me.

2243
01:27:06,722 --> 01:27:07,806
♪

2244
01:27:07,806 --> 01:27:09,099
Poor old George,
I don't know what

2245
01:27:09,099 --> 01:27:11,893
he's doing now,
but he--he's definitely

2246
01:27:11,893 --> 01:27:15,731
the architect of his own
demise as a film star.

2247
01:27:15,731 --> 01:27:18,525
♪

2248
01:27:18,525 --> 01:27:19,943
My name became a punch line.

2249
01:27:19,943 --> 01:27:21,111
George Lazenby,

2250
01:27:21,111 --> 01:27:24,906
legendary actor because
he played James Bond once.

2251
01:27:24,906 --> 01:27:26,450
Pope Benedict
figured he'd be

2252
01:27:26,450 --> 01:27:28,076
a mere palate
cleanser pope,

2253
01:27:28,076 --> 01:27:30,912
the George Lazenby,
if you will,

2254
01:27:30,912 --> 01:27:34,040
to John Paul II's
Sean Connery.

2255
01:27:34,040 --> 01:27:36,501
It's a famously
bad decision.

2256
01:27:36,501 --> 01:27:38,712
Yes.

2257
01:27:38,712 --> 01:27:39,713
That's fame for you.

2258
01:27:39,713 --> 01:27:41,381
I can remember
when it fell off.

2259
01:27:41,381 --> 01:27:43,967
I was, uh--
I used to get a table

2260
01:27:43,967 --> 01:27:47,012
at the Dorchester Hotel
sometimes for dinner.

2261
01:27:47,012 --> 01:27:49,222
I'd ring up and they'd
give me the best table

2262
01:27:49,222 --> 01:27:51,266
right there.

2263
01:27:51,266 --> 01:27:52,267
Rang up one day
and they said,

2264
01:27:52,267 --> 01:27:53,310
"I'm sorry, Mr. Lazenby,

2265
01:27:53,310 --> 01:27:54,811
we haven't got
any tables,"

2266
01:27:54,811 --> 01:27:57,647
after I got some
bad press and whatnot.

2267
01:27:57,647 --> 01:27:58,774
"Haven't got any tables."

2268
01:27:58,774 --> 01:28:00,525
"Oh, okay."

2269
01:28:00,525 --> 01:28:02,277
So I'd ring back
and say, uh,

2270
01:28:02,277 --> 01:28:04,488
"Oh, it's Cary Grant here.

2271
01:28:04,488 --> 01:28:06,865
Uh, do you have
a table for four?"

2272
01:28:06,865 --> 01:28:08,033
"Oh yes, Mr. Grant."

2273
01:28:08,033 --> 01:28:09,242
And I'd show up
and I'd say,

2274
01:28:09,242 --> 01:28:10,410
"Cary Grant's comin'."

2275
01:28:10,410 --> 01:28:11,661
And then I'd
call 'em and say,

2276
01:28:11,661 --> 01:28:12,704
"Oh, he just called me.

2277
01:28:12,704 --> 01:28:14,080
He's not coming now."

2278
01:28:14,080 --> 01:28:16,708
Just to stick it
back up 'em, you know?

2279
01:28:16,708 --> 01:28:19,294
Judy, Judy, Judy,
this is Cary Grant here.

2280
01:28:19,294 --> 01:28:20,504
Well, looking
back on it now,

2281
01:28:20,504 --> 01:28:21,838
it's taken up
a year of your life.

2282
01:28:21,838 --> 01:28:23,965
You've taken a few kicks
from some of the critics

2283
01:28:23,965 --> 01:28:25,008
and some of the press.

2284
01:28:25,008 --> 01:28:26,259
Has it been worth it?

2285
01:28:26,259 --> 01:28:28,762
I think so,
I hope so anyway.

2286
01:28:28,762 --> 01:28:32,390
I've always done what
I thought was the right thing,

2287
01:28:32,390 --> 01:28:33,850
and it's not always
the right thing,

2288
01:28:33,850 --> 01:28:36,561
but I thought it
was at the time.

2289
01:28:36,561 --> 01:28:37,687
You know,
when I look back on it,

2290
01:28:37,687 --> 01:28:38,814
I should have done two.

2291
01:28:38,814 --> 01:28:39,773
(laughing)

2292
01:28:39,773 --> 01:28:42,275
Just to prove to
people I wasn't fired.

2293
01:28:42,275 --> 01:28:43,693
But it was a mistake,

2294
01:28:43,693 --> 01:28:45,278
but in a way,

2295
01:28:45,278 --> 01:28:47,948
this is who I am.

2296
01:28:47,948 --> 01:28:49,699
I don't know why,
it doesn't make sense

2297
01:28:49,699 --> 01:28:52,160
to some people, they say,
"He's mad, he's crazy."

2298
01:28:52,160 --> 01:28:54,329
But I live my life
the way I want to.

2299
01:28:54,329 --> 01:28:55,622
♪

2300
01:28:55,622 --> 01:28:58,625
I regret breaking
up with Belinda

2301
01:28:58,625 --> 01:29:00,544
from time to time.

2302
01:29:00,544 --> 01:29:03,713
She taught me
what love was about.

2303
01:29:03,713 --> 01:29:05,715
She taught me
how to love.

2304
01:29:05,715 --> 01:29:07,467
♪

2305
01:29:07,467 --> 01:29:09,302
You can't get hung up
on something like that

2306
01:29:09,302 --> 01:29:11,096
or you--your life's over.

2307
01:29:11,096 --> 01:29:12,138
Does it concern you at all

2308
01:29:12,138 --> 01:29:13,974
that you may well
have turned your back

2309
01:29:13,974 --> 01:29:15,308
on a large fortune?

2310
01:29:15,308 --> 01:29:16,351
Oh, it does in a way.

2311
01:29:16,351 --> 01:29:17,435
I mean,
everyone would like

2312
01:29:17,435 --> 01:29:19,312
to be secure moneywise.

2313
01:29:19,312 --> 01:29:22,148
But, uh, I've never
been that secure with money,

2314
01:29:22,148 --> 01:29:25,360
and, uh, I think
I can make a living

2315
01:29:25,360 --> 01:29:26,987
at a few other things.

2316
01:29:26,987 --> 01:29:28,613
Which would you prefer?

2317
01:29:28,613 --> 01:29:30,907
To be a stereotyped
James Bond

2318
01:29:30,907 --> 01:29:33,660
or a car salesman
like you used to be?

2319
01:29:33,660 --> 01:29:35,453
Car salesman
like I used to be.

2320
01:29:35,453 --> 01:29:38,206
♪

2321
01:29:38,206 --> 01:29:41,251
Becoming Bond was
never my end goal.

2322
01:29:41,251 --> 01:29:43,628
While he admits there are
days he regrets his decision,

2323
01:29:43,628 --> 01:29:46,089
Lazenby says he's put
James Bond behind him.

2324
01:29:46,089 --> 01:29:49,551
I got married,
I had couple of kids.

2325
01:29:49,551 --> 01:29:50,886
I went into real estate.

2326
01:29:50,886 --> 01:29:52,762
I was very successful there.

2327
01:29:52,762 --> 01:29:54,431
♪

2328
01:29:54,431 --> 01:29:55,765
I ended up racing Motocross.

2329
01:29:55,765 --> 01:29:58,268
I always wanted
to race motorcycles.

2330
01:29:58,268 --> 01:30:01,021
It's very hard for
people to understand,

2331
01:30:01,021 --> 01:30:03,732
but living life
on your own terms

2332
01:30:03,732 --> 01:30:05,358
in your own way,

2333
01:30:05,358 --> 01:30:08,028
you feel like
it's much fuller.

2334
01:30:08,028 --> 01:30:11,156
The best thing you can
do is know yourself

2335
01:30:11,156 --> 01:30:14,034
and feel yourself
and be yourself.

2336
01:30:14,034 --> 01:30:14,993
♪

2337
01:30:14,993 --> 01:30:16,953
Yeah, I may not be great,

2338
01:30:16,953 --> 01:30:18,830
but I'm an original.

2339
01:30:18,830 --> 01:30:20,957
Perhaps the most
controversial choice

2340
01:30:20,957 --> 01:30:23,251
to play James Bond
was my next guest.

2341
01:30:23,251 --> 01:30:24,753
He took over for
the first time

2342
01:30:24,753 --> 01:30:25,712
from Sean Connery.

2343
01:30:25,712 --> 01:30:27,047
If that wasn't
tough enough,

2344
01:30:27,047 --> 01:30:28,048
he wasn't an actor,

2345
01:30:28,048 --> 01:30:29,132
but nonetheless
the film he made,

2346
01:30:29,132 --> 01:30:30,926
On Her Majesty's
Secret Service,

2347
01:30:30,926 --> 01:30:32,302
is celebrated by some

2348
01:30:32,302 --> 01:30:34,137
as one of the
best Bond films.

2349
01:30:34,137 --> 01:30:36,473
Welcome, please,
George Lazenby.

2350
01:30:36,473 --> 01:30:39,017
(applause)

2351
01:30:39,017 --> 01:30:41,061
♪

2352
01:30:41,061 --> 01:30:44,314
I'm proud of my life.

2353
01:30:44,314 --> 01:30:46,775
When I look back,
I was very fortunate

2354
01:30:46,775 --> 01:30:47,776
to have half a kidney

2355
01:30:47,776 --> 01:30:50,487
and expected
to live till 12.

2356
01:30:50,487 --> 01:30:51,446
Here I am 76,

2357
01:30:51,446 --> 01:30:54,532
and I've done
everything and more

2358
01:30:54,532 --> 01:30:56,117
than I ever expected to.

2359
01:30:56,117 --> 01:30:58,078
♪

2360
01:30:58,078 --> 01:30:59,829
I was happy to be
a motor mechanic,

2361
01:30:59,829 --> 01:31:01,247
happy to be a car salesman,

2362
01:31:01,247 --> 01:31:02,499
happy to be a model,

2363
01:31:02,499 --> 01:31:04,584
happy to be James Bond,

2364
01:31:04,584 --> 01:31:06,544
happy to marry
the person I married,

2365
01:31:06,544 --> 01:31:08,254
happy to have kids.

2366
01:31:08,254 --> 01:31:10,006
And they've all
been wonderful.

2367
01:31:10,006 --> 01:31:12,050
♪

2368
01:31:12,050 --> 01:31:14,844
I can't think of
anything I'd change.

2369
01:31:14,844 --> 01:31:17,013
Yeah, I'd probably have...

2370
01:31:17,013 --> 01:31:19,057
a few more pretty
women around, but...

2371
01:31:19,057 --> 01:31:20,100
(laughing)

2372
01:31:20,100 --> 01:31:21,351
What the hell.

2373
01:31:21,351 --> 01:31:22,435
♪

2374
01:31:22,435 --> 01:31:25,313
What do you hope people
remember about your life?

2375
01:31:25,313 --> 01:31:26,940
♪

2376
01:31:26,940 --> 01:31:29,401
Ooh, that's a good one.

2377
01:31:29,401 --> 01:31:30,777
So tell me,

2378
01:31:30,777 --> 01:31:31,903
what have you done?

2379
01:31:31,903 --> 01:31:33,238
♪

2380
01:31:33,238 --> 01:31:34,489
(clears throat)

2381
01:31:34,489 --> 01:31:35,782
♪

2382
01:31:35,782 --> 01:31:37,283
I'd like 'em to know

2383
01:31:37,283 --> 01:31:39,160
that you can defy

2384
01:31:39,160 --> 01:31:40,704
what is expected of you.

2385
01:31:40,704 --> 01:31:42,122
♪

2386
01:31:42,122 --> 01:31:43,707
And write your own story.

2387
01:31:43,707 --> 01:34:52,437
♪

2388
01:35:11,915 --> 01:35:14,667
♪