The following programme contains strong language and violent scenes.
QUANE: His wound is not healing.
DIVIS: What if he dies?
Does the prophecy say the chosen one catches up
and cuts the Veran's throat?
We have entered a new age. An age so dark
the words of the prophets can no longer be seen.
HEMPLE: You have gone a bit soft here.
You underestimate me at your peril.
I'm Aulus fucking Plautius! Then where is she?
The girl had a sister.
I want you to go and talk to her.
She's dead.
I'll go to the underworld.
But if we are gonna work together, there has to be some ground rules.
You don't eat anyone without my say so.
Agreed.
ANTEDIA: I was born sweet and cheerful, and I changed.
Your Majesty. (CHOKES)
(LAUGHING) ANTEDIA: Brace yourselves.
(FIRE ROARING / PEOPLE SCREAMING) Can you hear me, Aulus Plautius?
I'm coming for you!
She's on to you.
He may buy all of this, but she doesn't.
My name is Lucius.
I know who you are.
It was you. (SKIN BURNING / MAN SCREAMING)
Cait!
You can't escape this! None of us can!
QUANE: Whatever is unfolding, it is not yet written.
She won't desert us.
QUANE: How can you be sure?
DIVIS: Because I know her.
(HORSE SNORTING / DOG BARKING)
(HORSES WHINNYING)
No, no, no, no, no. It's the left one.
No, Dad, it's the middle one. Look, I know what I'm doing.
It's there. I saw it.
Ugh. Dad, I told you it was the middle.
It was the bloody middle!
Again?
You can choose two.
(RUMBLES CONTEMPLATIVELY)
You sure?
Shame.
(HE YELLS ANGRILY) Anyone else want to try their luck?
I'll give it a go.
Always like to gamble. Mm.
This one.
Oh, beginner's luck.
Another? Why not?
I saw you out on the road about three days ago.
Did you? You don't remember?
This one.
Hmm.
Another.
I'm sure it was you.
You stopped, stared at me and then said,
"What are you staring at?" What were you staring at?
Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear. You're not very good at this, are you?
Do you want to gamble or not?
Can you cover this?
Easily. I don't see it.
Buried. Out there. Oh, that's smart.
You win, I'll take you to it.
Damn right you will.
MAN: How much is that? MAN 2: Shh!
This is almost painful, but...
Wait.
Well, come on, sweet cheeks.
Let's see the lady.
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
Oh, fuck!
Keep it. Oh, go fuck yourself.
Why don't you?
Cos that's the way it's ever gonna happen, you ugly old bitch.
(SHE GRUNTS)
Everyone take a step back.
Game's over.
You gonna take that? Cockless ponces!
Ugly old bitch? It worked, didn't it?
Yeah, yeah, sweet cheeks. Mm-hmm.
Yeah! Come on!
♪ T. Rex, "Children of the Revolution" ♪
♪ Yeah!
♪ Well, you can bump and grind
♪ It is good for your mind
♪ Well, you can twist and shout
♪ Let it all hang out
♪ But you won't fool the children of the revolution
♪ No, you won't fool the children of the revolution
♪ No, no, no
♪ Well, you can tear a plane
♪ In the falling rain
♪ I drive a Rolls Royce
♪ Cos it's good for my voice
♪ But you won't fool the children of the revolution
♪ No, you won't fool the children of the revolution
♪ No, no, no
♪ Wooo-hooo! ♪
I did it! I did it!
Once you get the first bit, it all flows.
Look, it's finished. My new friend here helped me.
It's good, right?
(SMASHING)
Everyone's a critic.
Who are you? I'm Rain.
Cool name, hmm? Shut it, gaunt.
We're the White Ravens. We were summoned as guardians of the Veran.
Veran doesn't have guardians.
He hasaguardian.
Or did. Now he has an arrow.
Yeah, that's right.
Veran's arrow.
Right here.
Right there is my novice.
Don't, don't, don't kneel. Just...
Well, OK, it's fine.
Forgive the misunderstanding, Great Arrow.
It is the new Veran I guard.
The what?
Poor thing.
Poor, poor thing.
And you, Veran? The time has come.
You have travelled many times to the underworld.
That is useful to us now. What?
Do you know how to prepare for the deep sleep?
How to prepare the Veran?
"The" deep sleep.
Has it come to this? The new Veran is prepared.
Can you do it?
(SIGHS)
(HORSE NEIGHING AT A DISTANCE)
You understand your task?
I do.
Good.
Now go.
High Priestess.
(COOING)
(WHISPERING)
(SOLDIERS CHANTING)
HIGH PRIESTESS: You summoned me.
Indeed. I have devised a list of rules.
One, you and your friends are to remain indoors
after the hours of darkness.
Two, under no circumstances
are you to approach, speak to,
or fraternise with any of the serving men.
Three, your, erm, attire.
We'd appreciate it if you adopted
a more sober style of dress.
Something akin to this, uh? Help you blend it.
Local customs. Send the right message.
(WOMEN WHISPERING) Hey, hey.
No, no, no whispering.
Hey, stand over here where I can see you.
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
OK.
Now, have I made myself clear?
Can I try it on? What?
I like it.
Can I try it on?
Sure. (PRIESTESS CHUCKLES)
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
AULUS: General, quick word about the new arrivals.
I'm a little bit worried about the effect they're having on the men.
Oh, Widicus, Widicus, Widicus.
I've tried to tell her over and over, but does she listen?
Yeah, I'm a Roman general, I'm here to do a job.
YELLING: I am trying to build a fucking empire here!
Quell an insurgent populus.
Not bring your fucking wife to work day, is it?
Are you married?
Ay... Helen.
And where is Helen?
Back home with the kids. Exactly!
Hey, will you do me a favour? Anything, General.
The next time you see my wife,
you tell her exactly what you've just told me.
Right. Be firm, tell her what's what.
Don't hold back, because I've got a feeling
that she will listen to you.
Leave it with me. Thanks, mate.
Oh, and Widicus. Sir?
You just tell me how that goes, will you?
Mm-hmm.(LAUGHS)
(WOMEN LAUGHING)
Oh!
We were just talking about the underworld and your return to it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop!
What's wrong?
Excuse us.
First of all, that is my witch. Bought and paid for.
What is the reason for this... You stay out of this.
To find a sister, Islene.
Get her to lean on the girl. The Chosen One.
Right. Anybody else you want to tell?
I presume she's told you about the dangers.
Oh, dear, bit trembly-wembly? Oh, piss off.
Knocking knees, scaredy sparrow.
You were perfectly fine last time.
You know nothing of last time. Give me a day to prepare.
Hear that? Witch says, "Yay."
You're cleared for entry. You do not enter the underworld.
The underworld enters you. Ouch!
Save your breath - I've heard it before.
Veran spoke the truth.
Relax, Witch. Aulus is a big boy.
Then I shall prepare, as should you.
Spill it then. Spill what?
Why are you being such a chickeny boots?
What happened last time to give you the willies?
Nothing. Exactly.
Or you'd have told me.
Say, for example,
you started seeing things.
Things from your past, things which haunt you.
You wouldn't keep something as important as that to yourself.
You simply wouldn't dare.
How could I?
There is nothing I can hide from you.
Splendid.
Then I suggest you calm down, man up and prepare.
ANTEDIA: One for me. (COINS JINGLING)
One, two for you.
One for me and one, two for you.
CAIT: I don't mind down the middle. No, no, we shook.
It was your plan.
You're the one with the skills, though.
But may I give you just a little tip?
The fastest way to get gold out of a man
is to make him think he's getting one over another man.
Imagine a queen has two suitors.
If she goes on to A about how much gold B is lavishing on her,
it makes A jealous.
Before long, they're both lashing it around.
Then you simply flay them both alive and take the lot.
I think I could learn a lot from you.
That's just basic diplomacy.
But, right now, I'm on a mission.
What mission? Oldest one of all.
Revenge. On who?
A man. Well, there's a surprise.
I trusted him and he betrayed me,
and I lost... everything.
I'm going to find him, and I'm going to exact glorious vengeance.
Big plans don't come cheap.
First, I need my war chest.
War chest?
Yeah, like queens have when they really want to fuck up an enemy.
See, my big plans have several different phases.
Phase one, emancipation.
Also known as murder three in-bred butt-fuckers,
steal their horse and get the hell out.
And this, this is phase two,
Operation War Chest.
So it's like a quest.
Yeah, I like that. My quest.
I don't like quests. I'd rather just be.
Be what? Search me.
No, no, no, search yourself,
because that's where you'll find it.
Not out here, but in there.
(MAN SHOUTING IN THE DISTANCE)
(HORSE NEIGHS)
Patrol.
I don't expect you to join me.
Just as soon as I get enough scratch together,
then we can go our separate ways.
And when I find him,
and as I'm looking in his eyes
as I'm about to feed him his remaining testicle, I'll say,
"This one's for Maggie, a young girl I met on the road.
She helped me do this."
Thanks.
What is it?
The new Veran. He's very...
..small.
They always are.
Can't believe it's over.
It may be, my son.
It may be.
There will be other Verans.
But what power will they have?
QUANE: When the first man was vanquished,
he fell into the Lake of Tears
and the underworld was born.
From this darkness sprung light.
Light to light the way.
Now the flame flickers.
The way ahead darkens.
Until the day comes when the sun does not rise,
the earth lies black,
the rivers stilled,
Permanence will pass,
and in its place an endless, soundless void.
All our prayers, our sacrifices
will be silent screams,
bellows into nothing.
A sea of blood will not bring it back.
We will have failed the Earth,
we will have failed the sun,
we will have failed the river, the wind, the trees.
We will have failed our dead.
We will have failed our children.
We will have failed...
..what comes after.
Blood.
Only blood.
MAN: Have you never asked yourself
why I let you into the underworld?
(MUFFLED SCREAM)
(FIRE RAGING)
You think you understand this game, rogue?
WOMAN: It looks shiny.
Shiny or slippery?
(WOMAN MOANS) Like a newborn baby.
Our baby.
(AULUS GASPS)
MAN: Our baby.
Bad luck, boys. (MEN LAUGHING)
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)
(WOMAN GROANS) No!
We need to go. Not yet.
Over there, in the corner.
Massive purse around his belt.
Are you ready?
You lead. I'll follow.
♪ The Zombies, "Time of the Season" # It's the time of the season... ♪
Evening, treacle.
Are you buying?
What are we toasting?
Friends on the road.
Huh. If you like.
♪ And let me try it with pleasured hands ♪
Oh, you'll know the name. Surprise! It's Ravenhead.
I'm in oil. Oil?
Lamp oil. Finest lamp oil in the territory.
An oil man, how wonderful!
What brings you to these parts?
Two fine horses and a shared reckless spirit.
Pretty reckless yourself, taking that amount.
You mean this, or... this?
Take your pick, sweetie. (MAN LAUGHS)
♪ Has he taken (Has he taken)
♪ Any time (Any time to show)
♪ To show you what you need to live... ♪
I disguise the cargo
as something far less valuable.
Turnips.
Turnips. How clever! Genius!
♪ Of the season for loving ♪
Off you go. Enjoy yourselves.
(LAUGHTER)
Whoa! Not so fast!
Take this off first. Yeah. Oh.
You leaving too, love?
Suck my cock!
You little tart!
(STRUGGLING) What's this?
Hazelnut.
Look very, very closely.
Here you go.
What is that?
♪ What you need to live ♪
This cart of yours.
My secret archive. Mm. That's the one.
Where is it?
♪... Of the season for loving ♪
Turnips. Turnips.
You're a fast learner.
(WHIPS)
(SOBS)
I love you!
Rome would meet with the Veran again.
Go yourself.
Buy time.
They cannot suspect what happens here.
(VERAN MOANS) Be at peace, brother...
..if that is what calls you.
ANTEDIA: Do you have any idea what this is worth?
CAIT: I don't even know what lamp oil is.
We burn pig fat in buckets.
I'll tell you what lamp oil is.
It's phase three of the big plan.
What? Whoa!
I need a slash.
(SHE BREATHES HEAVILY)
(HORSES NEIGH AND MEN CALL IN DISTANCE)
There's a better road below through the valley.
We're safer up here.
How would you like to have to carry
a truly beleaguering weight of silver by this time tomorrow?
Thought so.
Change of plan, horsey.
You straying far?
We're oil traders. WHISPERS: What are you doing?
We heard there's a Roman camp nearby.
SOLDIER: What sort of oil?
Top quality lamp oil.
Six dozen jars - and a fair price for your quartermaster.
My daughter, Ivy.
Shy.
Don't worry, darling.
SOLDIER: Come on, you lot.
WHISPERS: This is a bad idea. WHISPERS: Trust me, Maggie.
Ivy. Ivy.
After this, we'll be living like queens.
What?
WIDICUS: What are you doing here?
I summoned the other one.
The general's wife.
You summoned Hemple? (CHUCKLES)
What's so funny?
Let's pretend you summoned me instead.
Here I am.
Summoned.
I'd appreciate it if you and your friends
could keep your activities to a bare minimum,
out of sight and earshot. (CHUCKLES)
And you are not to speak to the men
or touch any of the men.
You've got nice eyes...
Thank you. ..And mouth.
I'm married. We know.
Helen. Back home, with the kids.
How did you know about that?
Is she a good mum?
She's the best.
Bet she is, back home,
while you're here, doing your duty.
Is she a good wife?
She's... excellent.
I can be Helen.
Oh. (CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
(HORSES NEIGH)
No smoke, no stink. Top notch.
Why haven't I seen you before?
We're new to these parts.
Just like you.
Who'd you say you worked for?
We didn't. We're free agents.
Free agents, huh?
If your Emperor can't afford the best, don't waste our time.
Come on, Ivy. They don't want it. Let's go.
Sixty pieces a jar. (SHE LAUGHS)
A hundred.
Sixty-five.
Dear, dear, dear, dear... 95.
Our centurion's away. He doesn't return until morning.
Without his authority, I can't go above 70.
So 70's my final offer.
Your centurion's away?
Here's our final offer.
His quarters, his food, his wine, his bed.
And, in the morning, we'll shake on 70. Take it or leave it.
I can't do that.
And I'll throw in an extra jar...
..just for you.
Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oh!
Are you nuts?
This is a Roman stockade.
And this is Roman wine.
We should've taken 60.
And missed my first decent bed in years? Mm.
Life lessons, darling.
Always add some sprinkles to the bun.
I'm not happy.
You're very welcome to leave.
Aah! You have to admit,
it's better than the back of a cart.
First light. Huh?
We leave at first light.
Deal.
(PIGEONS COOING)
What did you mean last time...
..when you said I was your baby?
(SIGHS) My baby.
That's what you said. You and Veran.
You're shaking.
Just do it.
(PEOPLE YELLING MERRILY)
Who's gonna get me another drink?
Thought there were gentlemen around here.
I am a gentleman - around here. (LAUGHS)
(CHATTER FADES / CAIT BREATHING HEAVILY)
MAN: Hey, watch out.
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
Quartermaster, come with me.
Come.
That's Hercules...
No, it's not.
It's Epona.
Who's Epona when he's at home? She.
The horse goddess, and she is.
She is what? At home.
Unlike me.
So who's this Hercules then?
Hercules... stole the Girdle of Hippolyta.
Queen of the Amazons.
If you say so.
What's your name?
Listen, if you're looking for, you know...
I like boys.
Yeah?
Ivy. Caius.
Your mum's fun.
She's not my mum.
We met on the road. Hmm. Is that when you became a thief?
A thief, and a liar.
You stole that oil cart.
I was at the tavern. Saw the whole deal.
Took some real balls trying to sell it to our Quartermaster.
He'd love to know. Do you reckon?
He'll have your oil and flay you for fun.
Yeah, I wouldn't... I'm trained to kill.
Lucky for you I'm rubbish at it.
Plus, our Quartermaster's a total wanker.
Come on, don't be shy!
Oh, go and get a drink, boys.
I'll take it from here.
I've got something very special in here for you.
Nice and comfy in here.
Good boy.
Well, are you coming in?
(WHACK) Thank you.
So you won't tell anyone?
I've met real thieves. And you are not one.
So what am I? You're a bit lost.
Like me.
I think you may be right.
The worst part is, I can't tell anyone.
You just told me.
Do you ever see things? Things that aren't real.
Like what?
I don't know. Sorry. Stupid question. Forget it.
I said I was lost, not mad.
Whenever I am lonely...
I look up there and I pick one.
I send a message home.
To Mum.
Let her know I'm thinking about her.
And that I'm alright.
And I know she hears it.
She hears it.
I've really gotta go.
There's a northern boy I'm trying to pull,
and he is just about drunk enough. (SHE CHUCKLES)
It was nice meeting you.
Wish me luck.
Good luck to you, too... wherever you're going.
(JAR SMASHING)
(MEN YELLING MERRILY)
Dad... I miss you.
I miss everyone.
It's been a long road, but I've found someone.
And she's taking good care of me.
(CART APPROACHING) (ANTEDIA YELLS)
Oh, no.
(EXPLOSIONS)
MOUTHING: Oh, fucking hell.
(MAN SCREAMING)
(ANTEDIA YELLS)
Aulus Plautius, I'm coming for you.
(CHANTING IN LATIN)
So I'm your baby, am I?
(INHALES DEEPLY)
(PANTING)
Wait! Islene.
You have a sister in the other world.
Where is she?
You wish to visit the dead,
to know the way?
This way, my child.
This way.
ISLENE: Our beautiful child.
(GASPS)
(KNOCKING) (HE GASPS)
(KNOCKING)
Hello?
AccessibleCustomerService@sky.uk