***
- So I was thinking this weekend,
we go to Zippieri's for dinner and then go hit that
new indoor free-fall skydiving place.
I'd love to see how you'd deal with all that flipping around
after a fresh plate of spaghetti Bolognese, old man.
OK, her I understand, but you?
- It's a brand new world, kid.
I'm actually dating from the privacy of my own home.
- Wow. I'm in free fall already.
- It's called December Date, and it's for people of a particular vintage.
- You're not virtual dating too, are you?
- My generation doesn't date. - I like the sounds of that.
- We hang out independently in groups of guys and girls.
And then, through the magic of social media,
we "accidentally" meet up in packs.
- Let's go, kiddo.
- Bye, Dad. - Have a good day, honey.
Hey. On my estimation, it's been about a half century
since you went on a first date with Mom.
So word to the wise, Dad: slow and steady wins the race.
- Yeah.
Let's hope.
***
- My Dad's on a dating website, Jules is running
with a teen wolf pack. Did spring come early this year?
- It's a lonely world out there. Everyone wants a cuddle buddy.
- I guess you've got that covered,
Miss Say-it-With-Leather 2016. How is your mystery man, anyway?
- Have you figured out why you're so obsessed with who's dating whom?
- I get the sense you're about to tell me.
- Maybe... you're in a slump? (Matt laughing)
- Nothing like laughter to brighten my day. Thank you.
- Happens to everyone now and then, you know.
How long has it been? What's a dry spell for Matt Shade?
- Can we keep the investigation focused on our client?
- She's not just a client; Vanessa's a friend.
- Yeah, I know. I looked her up. Big-time architect. Very impressive.
- She's completely a self-made woman.
I helped with her divorce case last year.
Found proof her husband was cheating on her.
- So why's she calling now? - That's what's strange.
She didn't sound like herself at all on the phone.
All she would say was to come quickly.
- I'll call the police and have you charged with theft!
Please, stop it. OK, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Look, there's been a mistake. Let me make some calls
and get this straightened out. Please!
You can't just take it! Please, my God.
- Vanessa, what's going on? - They stole it.
They stole my whole life.
- Identity theft? - Apparently it was a two- phase plan. They got a hold
of my passwords somehow and set up phantom credit cards
in my name. Made a few small purchases
to see if I'd catch on. - You didn't.
- No. Once they learned they were in the clear,
they set up multiple lines of credit against my house
and made huge withdrawals. That's when the bank called.
- Aren't the banks insured against things like this?
- That's only if your credit cards are stolen.
The thieves stole my passwords.
- So the banks can't prove you didn't do it all yourself.
- No. They're saying I'm on the hook for seven figures.
What am I gonna do? - Everything's going to be OK.
Trust me, I've been there before.
My ex-manager cleaned me out.
- Did you talk to the police?
- They say they don't have the resources
for this kind of crime. They did tell me that most of the money
was used to purchase rare coins.
- That's a hell of a way to pad your coin collection.
- The thief flew to Miami, New York, Colorado to buy them.
First class. - I've seen it before.
The biggest obstacle that scammers face is converting
credit to cash, so they buy high-value items to resell.
Coins don't attract attention. - You toss a million dollar coin
in the tray at airport security and nobody looks twice.
- What about your routine? Anything changed there?
- I work 80 hours a week. There's no room for change.
- Anyone new in your life recently?
- You know how it is, Angie. Running your own business, there's no time.
- We're going to find out who did this. OK?
- Thank you. Just excuse me for a sec.
- I've worked high-level identity theft cases before.
It's brutal. - You mentioned an ex-husband.
You think this is personal? - Let's start with him,
check for proof of lavish spending lately.
- Follow the money trail. - And hope.
- ** I see you and you see me
* Watch you blowin' the lines when you're making a scene *
* Oh boy, you've got to know
* What my head overlooks
* The senses will show to my heart *
* When it's watching for lies
* 'Cause you can't escape my
* Private Eyes
* They're watching you
* Private Eyes
* They're watching you, watching you, watching you *
* Watching you *
- So why am I the one going through her ex-husband's trash?
- Your first dumpster dive! It's a time-honoured tradition.
- Ugh. Is this really necessary? - Trust me. Everyone throws out
their secrets with the trash. - There's two dozen units
in this building. We're never going to find anything.
Oh, it's disgusting!
- OK, well, you can get out now, anyway.
- You sure?
- Yeah. I found this in the third bag you threw over.
- Why didn't you tell me? - I wanted to be
absolutely sure. (Matt sighing)
- It's a car detailing receipt
made out to a Dean Barnwell.
2016 Porsche Panamera.
(car engine revving) - You mean like that one?
- Oh, my God, it's him.
We need to hide! If he sees me, he'll get suspicious.
- He doesn't know me.
Karma is a fickle mistress.
- Shut up and give me a boost.
- Watch out for the-- - Ew!
(engine roaring)
(Angie grunts.)
- What's all this? - You know, the raccoons
get bigger every year. You might wanna get a new parking spot.
Hey, that's a sweet ride. You get a chance to open her up yet?
- Uh, its top speed's 285, but I chicken out around 240.
- Yeah, I got a'69 911T myself. My ex-wife would freak out
if she ever caught me in anything like this.
- Luckily mine doesn't know. - How'd you manage that?
My ex was all over me. Even hired a private detective
to follow me around. - Mine too.
And like a dumbass, she caught me cheating. Ruined my life.
- Wow. Well, things can't be that bad.
- I lease it. I can barely keep up the payments.
Well, see you.
- Do you ever think about trying to get back together
with her? Your ex?
- Sure, but she's back out there already.
She's apparently been dating again, with a vengeance.
Wasted no time. Take it easy.
- Hey, you too.
There's nothing in your ex-husband's financial records
that indicates he had anything to do with this.
In fact, he's pretty much broke.
- He did say you were seeing people again. Is that true?
- About a thousand creditors. - So you haven't been dating?
- I wish.
A friend and I did go
on a speed-dating event about four months ago.
- Where was that? - The company was called
Constellations. I'm sorry, I totally forgot.
But I didn't go out on any dates after that.
- Speed-dating still works the way I think it does, right?
A bunch of guys sit across from you
for a couple of minutes each? - Ask you as many personal
questions as they can, as fast as they can?
- Oh, my God. You think I set myself up?
- Just give us a ballpark. How many guys are we talking about?
- Welcome to Constellations.
My name is Enrique Villanova.
I want to congratulate you on making the first step
toward a happier, more fulfilled life.
- Well, Vanessa picked a popular dating company.
- So a lot of guys then.
- If our thief is swimming in these waters...
I think we're diving in.
So how honest should we be on this speed-dating questionnaire?
- Honest-ish. - It's kinda genius,
using speed-dating. You grill someone for two minutes,
it comes off as interest. - Meanwhile, you're learning
all the common passwords: first pet, favourite movie,
even mother's maiden name. - What are you putting down
as a profession? - Urban planner.
It's close to architect. I'm trying to emulate Vanessa's profile as much as possible.
- Smart. - What about you?
- Owner of a sports memorabilia company.
- Not the sexiest...
- Hey, I could put down pet food taster and I'd still be catnip.
- So you are using this to break your slump. - Nothing here to break, sister.
And I'm starting to wonder if that "stride of pride" of yours
was all front. - Oh... You still frustrated that you don't know who it is?
- People in slumps are frustrated. Ergo,
I'm not frustrated at all. - OK.
- Favourite music...
- Remember, this is a vulnerable step for people.
So I'd go with something empathetic, like...
Sarah McLachlan.
- (scoffing): Sarah McLachlan...
Hey, honey! - What's the rush?
- I've got to get dressed. I got a date tonight with 20 women.
OK.
What's going on? I just teed one up for you. You let it go.
- I was wrong. - Wow, that's a first.
- Apparently, my generation does go on dates.
Liam just asked me out. - On a date.
- I don't even know what "on a date" means. Do I have to act
differently? Do I have to worry about what I'm wearing?
- I'm sure I'll worry enough for the both of us.
Where's this date happening? - He wants to take me
to Symphony Star Trek at the planetarium.
- No, no. The planetarium is out.
Planetariums are for making out. No one looks at the stars!
- Well, not looking is a given. We're going for the music.
- No. Honey, this is moving way too fast for me.
- You know, Dad, I could have used some real advice here.
But I'm glad we got your feelings on the subject straightened out.
- Honey, honey, honey. Look, I'm sorry.
It's just... I'm used to being the Liam in this situation.
When is this date happening?
- You can't tail us!
***
- How can we guarantee the thief's going to be here?
- We can't, but it's the only speed-dating event this month.
Ooh, I'll take one of those.
- It may be speed-dating, but they know how to do it up right.
- Yep.
- Did you pick up that eating technique at finishing school?
- I missed dinner.
Is there something on my face?
- Ladies and gentlemen, welcome.
Before you take your seats, let's review the rules.
You'll have two minutes to connect with each person
before the bell rings and you move on.
- So what's your plan? - I'm gonna trick our thief
into overplaying his hand. - How will you know
when someone's a suspect? - Identity thieves,
they feed on the minutia of your life and schedule.
If someone's overly interested in my personal trivia,
I'll get a second date request from them.
- Just like that? - Candy from a baby.
- ...you can "ping" anyone you wish via our app.
The ping comes with our patented emoji, requesting a date.
My advice to you all: be open,
and love will find you.
Now please take your seats.
- Meanwhile, I'm looking for victims of identity theft.
Meaning I have to find a way to ask these ladies
about their financial history without looking like a creep.
- Which should be a cinch. Unless you're in a slump?
(Matt laughing)
- 20 bucks says I get more dates off of this than you.
- I don't want your money. - 50? - Done.
***
- Ladies and gentlemen, time to get speed-dating!
- How about this? Instead of leading with our strengths,
we could do something completely crazy.
- Like, um... arm-wrestle?
- Or we could talk about the worst thing that's ever happened to us.
I'll go first. My manager stole all my money.
- All of it? - Every last dime.
- So what's the money issue? I'd love to help with it,
or with anything at all. - I'm debating taking my company
public, but I'm not sure I want the oversight. Call me crazy--
- You're crazy.
I mean, you asked me to call you that, right? I don't actually
mean you're crazy. I think you're amazing.
I'm blowing this. I am blowing this, aren't I? Oh, crap.
Your turn. - OK.
My dad shot my dog. - That's terrible.
- For eating his hoagie.
(whispering): Bang.
Ping me? (bell ringing)
- How much money did your manager take?
- I lost everything. Anything like that ever happen to you?
- Ugh. If I lost everything, I'd be a complete mess.
- Surprisingly, it's not the end of the world.
- Way to put on a brave face.
A cute, brave face. (bell ringing)
- I don't think it's wrong talking about money on a date.
- My CFO is worried about security, but I guess that's--
- How much money are we talking about?
- A very healthy sum. Why?
- I've got a Kickstarter campaign for a zombie repellent.
- Cool. (bell ringing)
- Do you want to know why all your money was stolen
by your ex-manager? - You bet I do.
- It's because you haven't given yourself over to him.
Completely. - Him...
Satan? - And you know what else?
People think believing in the occult means you can't
have a fun social life. Not true.
He will strip away false desire
and satisfy only the needs that matter.
- Well, I don't know much about pagan rituals,
but I like what I've heard. (bell ringing)
- I mean, I don't usually like to talk about my financials--
- Wow. Beautiful, smart, savvy and funny?
You're the whole package. And I know packages.
As a lawyer, I mean.
Corporate lawyer. Bay Street lawyer.
- So you're a lawyer. - Either that or medical school.
(bell ringing) (chatter)
(phone ringing)
- Why are you calling me?
- My date recognized me.
She thinks all pro hockey players are players...
...which makes sense, because we are. How's it going?
- It's not going anywhere because I'm talking to you!
- Well, have at it. Oh, FYI, I'm crushing it.
- Hanging up now. I'm crushing it too.
Sorry. - No problem. Jeremy.
- Angie. So what do you do for a living?
- Oh, I own an ad agency.
It's mostly web-based.
But talking about our jobs is just so boring.
- Ad agency. You must be
terrifically visual and very organized.
- I guess. - Probably really great
at managing money. I'm hopeless. - I'm worse, trust me.
(Jeremy sighing) Did you grow up in Toronto?
- What can that teach you about me?
- I only have two minutes. Less.
- OK, yeah. I grew up here. Downtown. - Cool. High school?
- Jarvis. - Favourite subject?
- English. - Pet?
- Like... first pet?
A cat. Mittens.
- No way! I had a cat named Mittens.
- What a crazy coincidence.
- This is so much better than talking about money, isn't it?
- You're so right. Can I tell you a secret?
I think it's so boring when people wait until the third date before they--
(bell ringing)
Right. Forgot about this. - Is this where we act like
we're really into each other? - So we make other people jealous. Good idea.
- OK. You go first. - OK. Your ex-manager.
What exactly happened there? - We'd need more
than two minutes to get through that story.
- Fine. Gimme the spiel. - The spiel?
- What would Matt Shade's closing arguments be
if this were a real date?
- I know we've just met,
and I know I'm only getting 10 percent,
but that 10 percent in my corner?
There's nothing I couldn't do.
And there's nothing I wouldn't do
to earn just five percent more.
And that is why I'm crushing it.
(ping) - Oh! Got another one.
(ping) - Can you call me?
I think my phone is busted. - It's OK if you didn't get
any date requests. Women are tough nuts to crack.
- Did you sandbag me with that whole Sarah McLachlan thing?
- What immense pleasure would I get from that?
And they haven't seen our profiles yet.
- Or are you right? Am I in a slump?
- Oh, come on. I was just kidding.
(pinging) It's really starting to pile up.
Let's go grab Vanessa and see if she recognizes
any of these guys. - You go ahead.
I'm going to take a little detour.
- Self-help book? Good for you, Shade.
- It's for my daughter.
- I know it is. (ping)
I'll put it on vibrate.
(buzzing)
- That's not helping.
(music playing quietly)
- (French accent): Teenagers. They are the ultimate challenge.
- Yeah.
Sign language?
- My teenage nephew is deaf
and I'm pretty sure he's swearing at me in sign,
so I hope to blow his mind with this.
- That looks dangerous. - Trust me, it is.
So, your teenager? - A daughter.
14. Actually, she's legally blind.
- Brave girl, I imagine.
- Sometimes I worry too brave for her own good.
- That can only happen when children feel secure
in their home life.
- That's the nicest thing anyone's said to me in a while.
Sorry, I normally make it a rule
to not just stand and stare at people like an idiot.
- It's OK. I normally make it a rule
not to interrupt people in bookstores
when they are reading.
But sometimes it's fun to break your rules, no?
- Matt.
- Sylvie.
Good luck with your daughter, Matt.
- Sylvie? Would you be interested in getting together
over coffee and discussing more about teenagers...
or any other subject you want?
- Lady's choice? - Definitely.
- Don't lose the bookmark.
- And... ping!
- (Angie): Recognize any of these people?
- I remember this guy from my speed-dating event.
Ken Barnes. He's a doctor.
- He told me he was a lawyer.
Add him to the suspect list.
- I honestly think the worst part of this
is never being able to trust anyone again.
- Angie doesn't trust anyone already, so that's the only part for her.
- One of life's little efficiencies.
- So how do we get this guy? - He'll slip up eventually.
They always do. - Here's another one
of your pings. Look where he's been in the last month.
Miami, New York, Colorado.
- The same cities the ID thief bought the rare coins.
Jeremy Cairns.
Rosedale address. Nice digs.
Do you recognize him?
- Maybe... - So Jeremy Cairns thinks
you're an easy mark. What's our next move?
- You look into doctor slash lawyer Ken.
And...
I've got a date with an identity thief.
- I understand you need me to be a different kind of parent
in different situations.
Sometimes you need me to be a confidant.
And other times, you need me to be a...
Uh...
Other...
"Cheerleader." Other times you need me to be a cheerleader.
(phone ringing)
Hey. I still think I should be out there with you in the field.
- We're looking for an identity thief, not a serial killer.
I've got this. - We could put a wire on you
and I could follow behind, listening.
- Does this scenario involve you helping me put on a wire?
- It's hard to do solo. - [Stick with the plan.]
Stake out Ken so you can figure out what he really does for a living.
- OK. You call if you need backup. Or help with a zipper.
(doorbell ringing)
- Hey! How do I look?
- What, are you going to a funeral?
(knocking) - Get the door.
- Liam. - Hi, sir.
- Well, come on in. - Thank you.
- So. Graduating from study buddy, huh?
- Ha, yeah. - Hey, Liam. Tell me about
your mother. Three things. - My mom?
- Yeah. - Um...
She's really smart. She works at a research council
as an epidemiologist. Oh, she has, like,
over 200 books and she says she's going to get rid of them
but never does. Uh... - That's enough. The kid's fine.
How does this look?
- You're going on a date.
- Yeah, well, us December Daters can't waste any time, you know?
But seriously, is this OK? - Yeah, you're rockin' it, Dad.
Just don't mention the Illuminati.
- Those no-good bastards. See you!
- See you!
- Liam, what you said about your mom was nice.
Means you respect her.
My dad thinks that it means you respect all women.
- I do, sir. I really do.
- Uh-huh. Look, Liam, I've been you.
So I don't want to be the Dad that threatens the boy
who comes over, courting his daughter. I don't want to be
the Dad who goes into vivid detail
about what'll happen to the boy if his daughter gets hurt
in any way, on any level.
But I will be that Dad.
I'll be that Dad all day long if I have to be.
- Hey, Liam. - Hey.
- Hey, honey.
Liam...
Would you give us a second? - Uh... uh...
It's kinda cold out here, sir-- - Yeah, just a minute.
Look, honey. I know you need me to be a different parent
in different situations. - OK...
- Sometimes you need me to be a confidant. And other times,
you need me to be a...
Other times, you need me to be-- - Did you rehearse this or something?
- I didn't want to screw this up, honey. I read a book.
- Keep reading, Dad.
(indistinct conversation)
***
(streetcar bell ringing)
- "And sometimes all you need is love"?
Seriously?
(cell ringing)
Hey, you OK?
- Fine. How's it going with Ken?
- [Well, our doctor, or is it lawyer,]
[lives in the crappiest building I've ever seen.]
- Oh, well...
if he's our identity thief, then he's keeping it on the down-low.
- You got that right. Is your date over?
- No. He just went to check on our reservation.
- Uh-huh. You sure you don't need me there?
Looks like Ken's turned in for the night.
- Aw, are you cold?
Did someone forget to bring their sleeping bag?
- I've decided to be the P.I. who stares down the cold of a stakeout.
- Well, I'm fine here, because it's an identity thief,
not a serial killer, remember? I'll see you tomorrow.
***
- They said 10 minutes. Don't know if I believe them.
You ordered more drinks? I like your style.
- Thank you, Jeremy.
I have a feeling that I could use your help with something.
- Sure. Anything.
- I'm thinking about re-branding.
Are you taking on new clients? - Yeah, new clients.
See, the thing is I'm actually pretty booked up.
For, like, six months. - Are you sure?
- I'd really love to help you out,
but learning about you seems like a better use of our time.
- So you keep saying.
- Beautiful, smart, funny...
Your own urban planning business?
Let's keep the focus on the more interesting party.
- Careful. Flattery will get you everywhere.
- I never should have tried to memorize the book.
I realize that now. - You have a lot to learn
about teenage girls. - That's why I bought the book
in the first place.
The problem is I'm still playing with the weekend-Dad playbook.
This fulltime thing is new to me.
I mean, it's great, but it's tough being a rookie again.
I just don't want to be the Dad who doesn't get it, you know?
- Have you tried telling her that?
- See, that sounds smart when you say it.
I'd really like to take you out again.
For a whole meal this time.
Appetizers. Desserts. The works.
- Ooh, big spender.
- How about tomorrow night?
What's wrong? - I'm sorry, Matt.
I should have told you, but I...
I leave tomorrow, for Paris.
- OK.
That sucks.
- So close to departure, I usually wouldn't go out
for coffee, but...
I think it's because I felt a real connection.
- Yeah, me too.
- Do you ever feel like
the difference between an average night
and a night you'll never forget
is simply making the choice to have it be so?
- It's all about attitude.
I've seen lesser teams beat better ones
for exactly that reason.
- So what about tonight?
Average?
Or never forget?
- Dad was a carpenter, huh?
What about your mother? What does she do?
- She works at the racetrack. - What's her name?
- Married? Or maiden?
- The more the merrier.
- As much as I'd love to talk about my mother,
I'd rather discuss my third date theory.
The theory about what a waste-- - I remember.
You wanna get out of here? Go back to your place?
- Unfortunately, my place is being painted.
I couldn't put you in that-- - I don't mind--
- Couldn't put you.
Unless, of course, you want to just call it a night.
- No! No, no, no.
Um... it's fine.
We can go back to my place.
- OK. ***
I thought you lived in Rosedale?
- I moved.
- Your place? - Five minutes away.
(ringing) (soft moaning)
Ah, I gotta get this.
Hey. Yeah, I don't know how your date's going, but mine's--
- [Wow, this street's so quiet.]
And deserted.
427 Elmore Avenue. Cute.
I didn't know you could find such a quiet,
[quiet spot in the city.]
- Is everything OK? - I gotta go.
- What? - I'm sorry.
You're amazing.
- What?
(door closing)
- Suspend all judgment, ye who enter here.
- Funny. - I wish I was joking.
(engine roaring)
(intense music)
(crash)
- Don't worry, Nanna. Stand down, soldier.
Jeremy's not our guy.
He's another victim.
(muffled): Coffee cake?
- I always thought that I was untouchable,
and then along comes this thief in the night
and steals your life away. - It proves how little
control you have.
- You know, I actually tracked down where they spent my money.
The trail didn't go very far, though.
- Let me guess: rare coin shops? - In Florida and Colorado.
They wouldn't tell me anything. - They guarantee the privacy of the purchaser.
- Even when he's spending somebody else's money.
- He or she. - I can't believe this happened
because I went speed-dating. - Join the club.
- The fact that you both used the same speed-dating service
is the strongest lead we've got. - But neither of you went
on a date after the session. - Which means that
only Constellations would have seen your questionnaires.
- Meaning we need to find out more about Enrique the love god.
- [Enrique's inside. We just have to sit here listening]
[and see if he makes a move.]
Keep the mic still! - [Yeah, yeah.]
[How come I gotta sit on the cold, hard pavement?]
And don't give me that "time-honoured tradition" speech
like at the dumpster. - Because homeless women
garner too much attention.
Sh, sh. - It's Enrique.
Listen. Our current arrangement has stagnated.
It's time to turn things up a notch.
How long before you can get here? Good. See you soon.
- That sounds promising. - [Let's sit tight.]
- Sitting tight is all I've got.
My ass is frozen.
- How's it going with Jules?
- [She's dating and not talking to me.]
My dad is dating and talking way too much.
(phone ringing)
I gotta take this.
- Stay in character! (beep)
- Hello? - [I never had a man]
[run away from me like that before. At least not that fast.]
- I'm sorry. It couldn't be helped.
[Maybe we could try saying our goodbyes again in person.]
- [I wish I could. But I'm going back to Paris tonight.]
- So miss your flight. - So romantic.
- [It is very tempting, but I think last night]
[may be all we have. It is a wonderful memory.]
- I bet we can amp that memory up, if you catch my drift.
- Subtle.
- I'm really sorry, but I have to go.
Again. Be well, Sylvie.
- [Adieu, Matt.]
- [What was that?] - Look who's coming.
- Ken Barnes.
- No. Forget it. Speed-dating is one thing,
but going on a real date afterwards
is completely different and you know what? It rhymes with "no."
- I'll make it worth your while. - Ah, look at this.
Cupid and Stupid hatch a plan.
- We're not taking applications today--
- That's not why we're here. We're representing two former
Constellations customers who've become victims of identity theft
after attending one of your speed-dating events.
- So you can hand over their money in full, or our next stop can be the 57th division.
- Slow down. I'm happy to offer a refund
to any dissatisfied customer. But my business here is totally legit.
- Yeah, we can tell you're totally on the up and up.
You and Lawyer-Doctor- Lumberjack here.
- I don't know anything about this.
- Oh, yeah? Then what's your story, hot stuff?
- I'm an actor.
- He's a ringer. Ken of the multiple identities
and fabulous ass is a plant.
You're gaming your own system.
- I consider it value-added, OK?
The people that come to these events, they're vulnerable
and fearful. Employees like Ken ensure they leave here
feeling at least somebody finds them completely fascinating.
- "Be open. Love will find you."
- We're going to need information on every employee that works for you.
- I can't do that. - Or I can call my friend
over at The Star. Ask him to do a profile on Constellations,
featuring Ken here as the kind of guy
that women can expect to meet at one of your speed-dating events.
How does that sound?
- I'll get you the files.
- Any employee with access to Constellations's customer files
could have easily set up an identity theft.
- With that access, choosing the right target would be a breeze.
- They wouldn't even have to participate in the speed-dating part.
Are you OK? - Yeah, I am. I'm fine.
Would you mind if we split these files
and I worked on this from home? It's Jules.
I missed her getting home from her date last night.
I'd like to be there when she gets home today.
- Of course. Just meet me at the office when you're done.
Mon petit chou-chou.
- Hey. - Hello.
- I thought we said goodbye? - We did.
But I couldn't leave without a parting gift.
- What about your flight?
- I pushed it. - Until when?
- Tomorrow.
After that I guess...
- We think someone gained access to your personal computers,
possibly through Constellations's
computer system. - I'm beginning to lose
all faith in humanity. - I've lost mine completely.
- Now that would be a genuine shame.
- Let me know if any of these employee pictures look familiar.
Now, you said after the speed-dating event
that neither of you went out on any dates, correct?
- I didn't get any pings. - I seriously can't believe that.
- Forget about other speed-daters.
Did you meet anyone new around that time?
- I became friendly with a woman at my gym, Helene,
but Cyclefit isn't a strong basis
for friendship, I suppose. - I met somebody too.
Veronique. I really thought we had a connection,
but it fell through. - Fell through how?
- She had to move back home, to Paris. - To Paris.
There! - Veronique.
- Oh, my God. Helene.
- Paris.
***
- Hey, what's the rush?
- I didn't want it to be awkward
in case your daughter comes home.
But...
how about you relax,
and I make us breakfast for dinner?
- I love breakfast for dinner!
- Mm, good.
Leave it to me.
Have a shower and...
take your time.
- OK.
(door closing)
***
(tapping)
(beeping)
(soft music playing)
- * Your love is better than ice cream *
- Adieu, Matt Shade.
- You lost? - No, I wanted to surprise you.
I've rebooked my flight.
- Fantastic.
- So...
Do you like it? - I'm curious.
Why would you buy me this CD?
- Well, it was playing in the bookstore when we met.
I'm sure I saw you singing along.
- Liking Sarah McLachlan is a lie I told
on my Constellations questionnaire,
along with the lie I told about what I do for a living.
- I saw the pictures in your office.
So you've lived a whole other life.
- I did, before someone stole it from me.
Now I'm focused on my new life,
as a private investigator who's been hired
to catch an identity thief.
And I bet if I looked in your purse right now,
I'd find a couple of rare coins, wouldn't I?
- Matt.
What happened upstairs, between us?
That wasn't business.
- It felt a lot more like pleasure, I'll give you that.
- Work with me.
We could make a lot of money together.
A lot.
- See, here's the thing.
I've already got a partner.
In fact, you should meet her.
- Hi.
- Agh! It burns!
- I know. Try rubbing your eyes really hard.
(groaning)
(muffled conversation)
(Sarah McLachlan playing)
- No, don't. Don't.
(whispering): So cute.
Aw.
- It's the pepper spray. - Yeah. Me too.
- (Sylvie): Ow. - Ah, ah, ah!
***
Sylvie was a systems expert who did some work
for the speed-dating company over a year ago.
- She set up a mirror site that allowed her access
to everyone's profiles.
- The police found her rare coin collection.
It may take some time, but you'll get your money back.
- Thank you.
I feel like you've given me a new lease on life.
- I can echo that.
You know, the strange thing is this really feels like
one of those worst thing-best thing scenarios.
- Oh, yeah? How's that? - Sometimes it's good
to remember starting over's not the end of the world.
- Shall we?
- (quietly): Yeah.
- Wow.
We could give Constellations a run for its money.
(music playing in earphones)
OK, look.
Honey, this is over. - What is?
- Us not being able to talk to each other. - Yeah, I don't like it either.
- I trust you and I know you're smart.
But these boys coming around,
all I can see is my little girl
and all I want to do is protect you.
I was talking at you and not to you,
and I'm sorry, OK? - (whispering): OK.
- Man. I have just come from the best...
run.
- In hard-soled shoes? - Dad, maybe you should...
go take a shower and get cleaned up.
From your run.
- That's a good idea.
(inaudible)
- So that's what they mean by "walk of shame."
- Honey, I know I said that we should talk about everything,
but not that. Never that. - Agreed. Yeah.
- Yeah. Wow.
(ping) (Matt laughing)
- What's with you?
- Part of Sylvie's M.O. was to make sure her victim
didn't get any date request pings after the speed-dating event.
- To make them feel vulnerable. - Mm-hmm.
- Smart. - Once her mirror site
was dismantled, my phone blew up. Ping city.
- Are you going to answer any? - We'll see.
- So tell me, does it count as the end of a slump
if sex was part of the con?
- Again -- there was no slump.
- You're evading the question. - A gentleman never tells.
You know, I feel like we never really
gave our speed date a chance.
- As the French say: c'est la vie.
- What else do the French say? - I think you're the expert there.
- Most of the time, she was speechless.
- Ugh, too much information. - You wanted to know.
- Speaking of which, we have time now.
If I asked about your ex-manager,
would you deflect with some funny line
or tell me what really happened?
- In a nutshell? I trusted the wrong person.
- Hate when that happens.
You know, this speed-dating thing
reminds me of what my dad used to call the "two-minute you."
- I'm listening. - Well, anyone can put on a show for two minutes.
But it's someone you want to spend that third minute with...
that's the person you're looking for.
- That's a solid theory.
***